#idk guys I should sleep more
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I’m still SO ITCHY like agonizingly so but it’s almost 6am here and my family are starting to wake up so I can’t even go to the car or anything 😢 idk what I’ll do I feel like I’ve never been this snexually frustrated before
#gonna start using snexually frustrated#for times whe you really wanna sneeze but can’t because of all the vanilla present#or because it’s stuck#or whatever#snz#self obs#idk guys I should sleep more#sorry for spamming
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HE FELL IN LOVE WITH HER AFTER LEARNING SHE WAS JUST A BIRD
The whole show. The whole show. We have this long running character beat of Duck beloved she, as she truly is, is unloveable and once people see her to her very core they will abandon her. But simultaneously!!!!! We have this subtle plot building of fakir, fully aware the girl has feathers, falling in love with her! And it’s so slow it doesn’t come to the forefront until the very end and AAAAAAAAA the amount of times Duck laments how no one would care about her as a bird meanwhile fakir looks at her with the most adoring eyes shut up!! Shut up literally shut up!!!! People will love you for the things you hate about yourself and you’ll have no goddamn idea because you’re so wrapped up in how YOU see yourself!!!!! HE LOVED THAT LITTLE BIRD MORE THAN SHE HATED HERSELF
#going insane I need to go to sleep#not a coherent meta post sorrt#I needed to scream#as I do#constantly#wait I have a smarter post to make in the morning#i have thoughts about needing other people to boost your low self esteem vs genuinely growing to like yourself more because of others#positive impact on you#if that makes sense#idk I’m sleepy#I may have made up a straw man#but I feel like there are people out there who are like well why should she need some guy to feel better about herself#which! yeah she should be able to feel confident with or without him#but she was at such a low point she needed a friend to pull her out#we don’t see her given time to heal#lea talks#princess tutu
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obligatory kh1 Paopu tree scene redraw
og under cut <3
#click for better quality as always#this is so messy but it was so fun#ITS ALSO LIKE SOMEHOW THE FIRST TIME IVE PROPERLY DRAWN KAIRI <3 SORRY GIRL IDK HOW IT TOOK THIS LONG#i wanted to shift this a lil more toward my style but other than riku i got kinda lazy icl ASKDNKJASNDKJSN#yes the bg is a bunch of squiggles. no i have not drawn a bg in several years. no i do not care. dont @ me#still tryna figure out how to shade on krita#ALSO ACTIVELY SPREADING DESTINY TRIO FRECKLE PROPAGANDA !!!!!!!!!#blue eyed freaks. miss them <3#Sora's hair i hate drawing u but its so iconic#not intended sorikai but do what u want !!!#this was soooo fun to do#i should do more redraws and drawovers#drawing is so fun but beware. time will pass#it is (checks watch) 3:30am#well im gonna have a lovely sleep gn guys LMAO#i cant tell if i like the end product tbh so this either will be here tomorrow or it will disappear ig#but again it was so fun to do#OK ENOUGH TAGGS BYBYE#kingdom hearts#destiny trio#destiny islands#kh1#kh sora#beverly says stuff#kh kairi#kh riku#soriku#kairi kingdom hearts#riku kingdom hearts#sora kingdom hearts
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was watching apocalypse with my brother and once the cerebro scene popped up he was like 'charles has a helmet like erik, only instead of keeping people out, he tries to reach out and connect with others' like guys i need to bash him with a rock
#xmen#xmen apocalypse#xmen movies#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#is this cherik. probably#snap chats#GENUINELY what is his deal#'snap i thought you were watching x2' and i finished it and then my bro came up so i decided to rewatch apocalypse while he was here#hello chat. im aware the people enjoy my brother's quotes so here i am sharing another as it has damaged my brain#GUYS I HATE MY BROTHER WHY DOES HE KEEP SAYING THIS SHIT BEFORE I CAN THINK IT#so real tho ..... also i may be drunk so maybe im more emotional about this revelation than i should be but still#basic observation im aware but still ... doesnt become less wack when you say it out loud ....#thats so fucked ... i mean 'people' being charles but still ... why would you say that#i still have some of my whiskey left so im gonna pound it and then drink some water and probably cry myself to sleep#or ill doodle a sketch idk. im inspired.#for now good night !!!!!!!!!!!!! all my brother does is accidentally inflict psychic damage upon me#AGAIN you never expect it from your brother but thats what makes it esp whiplash inducing .......
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Huevember 11
Karen and Rick but in the DND AU. (I just look at this and think 'Barbie learned eldritch blast' but ya know. Whatever.)
#my characters#oops i fell in love#shocking zero people rick is one of the most side characters you can side aside from erin#like at least he appears in canon OIFIL#he and karen are platonic soul mates for the record and that is SO important to me#karen is always surrounded by guys and decides to try a dating app and then matches with rick#and is like omg what a handsome guy ??? score?#and then goes on a date with him and is like sorry but has ANYONE told you that you're way cuter in person#and he is like excuse me? is that bad?#and she is just so devastated to explain sorry man you just make me want to treat you like a brother#i cant help it - youve got a stellar profile pic but dang the real deal is just. cute. bummer#and then they ghost each other and then they match on a different app#and after a while they start to meet up after matching but in a strictly friendly way to mourn the shot at romance#also karen is surrounded by bisexuals but is straight and then meets rick who is also straight and shes like#really im not shocked im feeling NOTHING for the only other straight person in my life#im going to go lie in a bag and sleep i hope#gotta take care of me and me has a headache#so i guess i should go get more water before death i mean sleep#idk why my hues are only for oifil ??? brain no work with hues and fanart ???
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people will think im ordinary until they say one (1) thing about tmnt and all of a sudden im explaining the entire lore starting from the 1990’s movie & why donatello is the best turtle i fear… T^T
tag limit fights me… i must yap… please listen… SOB </3
#tmnt yap in the taggies !!#would you believe me if i said my cat is named after donnie… teehee !! ^_^#i have been a tmnt lover since i was the ripe age of 6 years old SOBSOB#i used to write bf headcanons on wattpad way long ago… thats where my love for writing started i fear…#i probably have more tmnt merch than i do anime merch which is soso crazy to think about PHEW !!!#notebooks cups plushies legos shirts pajamas stickers tins action figs keychains name something and i have it… is that weird… SOB#im not joking when i say i know the entire lore and could explain everything from start to finish… FOR EACH AND EVERY REBOOT EVER…. wowza…#other than rottmnt because i’ve never been a fan of that reboot sigh…#the only reason donatello hamato isnt on my blorbie list is because i do not want to seem out of touch… he used to be there though !! :3#also i love raph too sigh#i fear donnie was my start to my love for nerdy men… raph was for the mean ones… cough cough akaashi and bakugo#tall lanky men… yeah hes a turtle… i know… let me speak… pls… i beg… T^T#tmnt 2012 will always be my star my light my beloved#i can recite every single episode </3 ALSO THE 2014 & 2017 MOVIES DONT GET ME STARTED i have them on dvd :3#i also have the 1990’s movies on dvd teehee theyre sososososoo good T^T my comfort franchise forever and always#i may always speak of anime but just know tmnt will always be the start of it all and my most beloved <3 its everything to me#also i was and still am an avid tmnt 2012 april oneil hater someone get her out of there i loathe her >:/#was never a supa big fan of leo im very sorry… idk who im sorry to… where are my tmnt fans… am i alone in this world… hello… tmnt fans…#omigosh im back after looking at my old wattpad story IM GIGGLING why was the writing kinda good… it was first person though sigh… goodness#i should create my own tmnt yap tag i fear… i will never shut up about it EVER SOBSOBSOB !! i even had a tmnt party when i was younger </3#donnie ( & mikey ) are so misunderstood UGH i could yap about the lore all day. donnie deserved more recognition he was always doing so muc#FOR ALL of his brothers and they never appreciated it… ill cry right now. donnie you will always be famous to me. april doesnt deserve you.#raph and his temper are so misunderstood too like please. always making him the bad guy HE JUST WANTS TO BE A GOOD BROTHER HES JUST AWKWARD#remembering when i had a crush on a guy names joseph in first grade and he liked tmnt too… joseph just know we were soulmates… i promise </#i used to go up to the tv and kiss the screen when donnie showed up. i was like 6 years old tho its okay… still sleep with my stuffie tho.#thank you to my yaya for buying me that when i had the flu hes still in perfect condition SOB donatello i love you so much UGH im crying#‘thats a mutant turtle ew !!’ HE IS VERY BEAUTIFUL AND LOVEABLE TO ME. YOU WOULDNT UNDERSTAND EVERYPONY </3 nia reference woah hi nia :3#whos in favor of tmnt. raise your hands up high so i can see them. im giggling. tmnt lovers rise we sha’ll prosper… WE RIDE AT DAWN 🦅🦅🦅#is this like totally crazy of me… has anyone read this far… if you have jusy know i love you. i cherish you. you are my everything <3#₍ᐢ..ᐢ₎ — lene’s latest gossip .ᐟ
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would they ever let lear or any of the rest of the pokemas originals appear in other games. the chances are so low but they're too fun to just leave in the mobile gacha game :(
#clai speaks#emmet this volo that. the person who gets isekai-ed into legends za should be Lear#paulo's cool i liked his whole thing#pasio as a whole i wish could be a mainline. a whole artificial region that you dont get to explore bc there isnt any walking around#theres very very Very few sections where you get some screens to move from but you get stuck in one place and just pan about the scene#like idk. ash and team rocket got to be in pokemas and team rocket also got to be in lets go. give me more cameos and things#if they do bw remakes you could put prof neroli from sleep into the dream world mechanic idk!!#idk who else wants more neroli but i do!!!#this just goes back to that post i made about being upset that pkmn stopped doing cameos in gen 8#its inevitable. pkmn has such a MASSIVE cast a lot of them are just going to be oneoffs#but its fun to see them pop up even for minor things like how grimsley is just. in alola for whatever reason and he's not plot relevant#this ramble got away from me uhhhhh point is i love the pasio guys i should probably actually. draw them bc i never have BJDBFJFJ
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like on the one hand language matters and i too sometimes find slang trends annoying and/or concerning and on the other hand sometimes women do actually make jokes and talk shit on the internet with their friends and it is not actually that deep and commentary on phenomena gets to a weird point where i’m like i don’t know how “these idiot losers on the internet using a two to four word phrase they will have moved on from in a year are basically the primary cause of patriarchal oppression” is the feminist take. like sometimes i start to think the plot has been lost.
#girl dinner sort of radicalized me on this#but i recently saw (can’t remember where) a really impassioned and genuinely angry and upset deep reading of ‘i’m just a girl’#which more than anything made me think of the anti taylor swift redditors who think it’s super weird when swifties call her mother#bc they’re online but in that particular reddit way where they’re still offline enough to like. think swifties invented this#and that it came from their troubling psychosexual obsession with taylor swift#and is uniquely revealing of the swiftie mentality#instead of… well i don’t have to explain it to you.#like are there people as accused in wherever i saw this trying to use ‘i’m just a girl’ to dodge accountability or refuse to grow or w/e?#yeah probably. people with bad personalities do all kinds of things!#i don’t really believe in the hypothetical adult woman who would be learning and growing if only she had not encountered#people on the internet saying ‘i’m just a girl’ who gave her permission to thus infantilize herself#i think that’s making up a guy to get mad at. girl to get mad at. whatever.#and like it’s complicated and if for example you said girl math to me i would become the joker instantly….#but…. idk. sometimes it feels weird! sometimes the vibes are off!#also i should be sleeping but i have had the HICCUPS#although working myself up about this seems to have distracted me while they calmed down
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I have gotta figure out a way to smash my interests together but that's kinda difficult when it's fucking saw and the stupid 80s band that's cursed me for more than a year (read: devo.)
Uhhhh, I kinda think Lawrence might've (very casually) liked some of nutra, but like, that's all I got
#idk billy and booji being in the same room is mildly amusing#I just badly want them to cross over and I can't unfortunately#like it kind of works with twin peaks cause its set in 89 and also theres direct connections between the band and david lynch#ie: them playing in heaven live and mark was supposed to be in a lynch movie that never got made#and like#there is a tie of association between saw and devo (nin being used in saw 0.5 to which devo covered head like a hole)#(which also also trent has stated he likes devo; he did not enjoy the cover though which is understandable)#sorry tags fear me I love rambling#like I can connect a decent amount of music I like from adam being shown with an industrial song in his apartment#but I cannot in good faith say anyone in saw would like devo more than a couple radio hits and even then thats a stretch#okay okay I should sleep and not get scared to post (again)#uhhhhh actual tags this time#devo#saw#sawtism#yeah okay thats enough big fandom tags scare me way more than they should#wait actually the idea of lawrence in the nutra pomp is quite amusing as well#(<- original thoughts that no one should ever think of)#okay okay im leaving guys goodbye and good night#jesus christ the tags are twice as long as the post#me when I get scared to blog on The Blogging Website
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sometimes when a con is coming up my coworkers and hang out after work at some space at our workplace making our cosplays which is great and chill bc i love doing my crafts in an environment where i feel at ease. anyways. one of them needs to look after her cat and she suggested that we do our thing at her place. which. yeah ofc! but also day instantly ruined from slight deviation to plans. i was supposed to go home. grab my materials. eat. grab an energy drink to go and drink it while sitting on the floor of a meeting room doing stuff to foam clay. but now i have to go to someone's house. i havent been there before. i am not at ease at anyone's house almost ever. i will be too anxious to get shit done. i will not be able to enjoy my energy drink as i dont want to be sipping it at someones House yknow. and i'm also terrified of being in the way or in someone's turf when im not at all familiar with the place. i cant sit on the floor at someones fancy home idk if i can manage working under conditions that aren't shrimp pose.
#i will be SO brave tonight at the cost of my social battery#which is fine ig since i dont have work tomorrow. just fun things.#but friday and saturday will b suuper busy as there's a music festival i actually enjoy and im going there with 2 friends 2nd year in a row#which will also be fun#but draining#but not so draining that it would require anything more than sleeping in on sunday#anyways do you guys think i should finally do something about my social anxiety#i mean i should and i could bc of work healthcare but idk how to do that#i need a step by step#and i cant get one bc ill just get a ''just call there''#which. i can do phonecalls nowadays. but i will not be able to say anything i want to so i will need to prepare#anyways welcome to my anxiety rant i will now go back to editing on the clock lmao#leevi talks
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SUPRISE ART DROP! May you enjoy this May.
#pokemon may#this was. SUPPOSED to be half of a valentines piece.#but drew was giving me ISSUES#I spent three days messing with his linework before I gave up#BUT NO WORRIES I have other plans#might reblog from myself again tomorrow since i'm posting this when most est timezone friends are asleep OR SHOULD BE#GO TO SLEEP GUYS.#I may finish the other half of this one day when I'm not utterly fed up with drew#probably in an altered art style since he kept getting into uncanny valley territory for whatever reason. idk how#i think it was the softer shading/rendering over just sharp shadows and stuff#but congrats! you guys get two art pieces out of me in the span of a week.#so basically more this week than most months#may#coordinator may#pokeani#taylor's tag#art
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In hindsight it's. not that surprising that my anxiety is really bad since I had the night hallucinations that make me see Creatures in my room since I was like four. For the longest time I was like ah yes part of it are the nightmares I had as a child and only now I'm realizing that oh yeah. probably the Creatures as well. that was a thing.
#they should've made Venom metal gear hallucinate more that would've been awesome#can you tell that I had a really shitty sleep guys#small amount of these type of hallucinations is considered normal and somewhat common btw#but uh let's say I do not think I have them a small amount#do we think I should see a doctor about it chat. I think maybe it's time#idk which one though internet is not helpful#anyway yeah Venom metal gear I've been thinking about him a lot what a guy#girl who has hallucinations voice wow I wonder why I find the themes of loss of grasp on reality so compelling. we'll never know.#faksyan talks#eghh dunno if I need any tws on that it's a personal post anyway hope no one gets it recommended
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Just a bit of a rant but yashiki overly-sugared coffee actually makes me feel nostalgic:
Back when i was little my dad always stayed up late to organize and remix some musics for each shows he comissioned. I liked watching him worked so sometimes i sat next to him and copied each and every moves he made, including drinking coffee on work. So like a naive idiot, i tried that hot black coffee that sitting next to the organ, and bc the coffee was hot and bitter and strong i spilled the hot bitter coffee all over myself. And yes i hurt myself in the process. Dad didnt get mad eventhough some of the music sheet was stained by the coffee. So he comforted me and gave me a shot of espresso with a amount of sugar that fit toddle me taste for a try. (Which btw the right amount of sugar to mask away the bitterness). That was a detrimental mistake dad made since who’s in the right thought to give a sugary nicotine black water to a kid in the middle of the night? He wasnt the perfect parent but i know he was trying to be at that time.
Anyway back to the present, i liked my coffee flatwhite and cappuchino with sugar ofc
#minty rambles#minty posting#idk if i should tag death mark in this#nostalgia#reminiscing#old memories#childhood#childhood memory unlocked#childhood memories#time capsule#death mark#death mark fans u guys can ignore this post it has nothing to do with death mark it just me being sentimental#but feel free to ask more about it#minty being sentimental and should be sleeping#shiin#now that i think about it how come does yashiki like overly sugared coffee#i like to think he had the same childhood experience as mine except with dolls but idk how is yashiki dad like#yashiki did said that he used to poke holes on the painting as an act of rebelious which is so cute
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semi-vent/semi-headcanon but making specifically a police officer the narrator (lockstock) was kind of crazy and perfect because like. they have the ego to be narrators. does that even make sense? you could argue that it's because he's in the middle between the rich and the poor because he's part of the law, but that's not true because cops are intrinsically harmful and biased. in a way, lockstock is an unreliable narrator. he's still violent to the poor when he's not narrating. he still kills bobby. from a story-telling point of view, this doesnt matter because to the audience he's more of a narrator than he is a cop, but from the point of view of the poor people, officer lockstock kills one of their own. i feel like there's a joke there that lockstock doesn't actually protect the city because he's too busy narrating, and when he does, he's just as violent as barrel.
#urinetown#this one might be grasping at threads but i had an experience today where i called 911 because i was worried about the wellbeing of this gu#who was literally fucking sleeping in a bush and i was worried he was fucking dead or something so i called 911 and they sent a cop to chec#and he was literally just like “yeah i know who that is. i know his name that's just what he does he's fine”#like they dont fucking do anything man#this sounds really naive and privileged and it is and i feel so fucking shitty about that but the more i become aware of fucked up shit tha#goes on in reality the more i realize how fucked up urinetown is and would be#i mean they REALLY hit the nail on the head with that play#and i dont mean to like project that experience onto some stupid musical im still worried about that guy and it was a shitty experience but#its a paralell i noticed a couple hours ago and feel like people should know about? maybe not idk its been a long day#delete later probably
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survived Badly (argh) but going to work on fic for as long as I continue to enjoy doing so then switch over -- see if I can find somewhere to watch The 400 Blows and probably cry forever and dehydrate and feel soooo sad and then feel better after. Thank you French New Wave
#boooo whatever saying nonsense nothing matters delete later#somebody should invent a proximity to your parents that doesn't immediately make you so emotionally weird forever#overdramatic. Im feeling fine im eating some crackers and lying around chilling. Just. Weird. Off Balance..#Mild Disturbance in my Year of Exceptional Emotional/Mental Chill#not gonna let it break my 2024 streak of feeling generally Pretty Freakin Good and mostly Recovered From The Lost Year#Which btw. can I say... have i said...? Genuinely having one of the nicest years of my life so far... feeling really pretty good#mfw having more control over your life + surroundings + choices + living circumstances means you can genuinely#meaningfully improve ur day-to-day lived experiences and find what works for u to keep u happy + healthy + excited about life... magic#anyway. brief Huh I Feel Kind Of Bad And Sad In A Deeper Way Kicked Off By But Unrelated To Events Of The Day moment earlier#really made me realize how exceptionally good I've had it so far this year... i think... it's possible... things Do Get Better#anyway. ok done Tag Blogging now. just hope everyone enjoys a nice treat or something. get good sleep enjoy ur time change if it applies#watch a movie or something. idk have fun guys have a good night
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spinel: passion, devotion, longevity
#man. just. man#i might make these drawings a series with the explorers?#idk#anyways i started thinking this one up before the newer episodes#but i think it's still pretty appropriate#i think the whole eye taunt might have been more fitting for coral?#i think that's her name#but it still works for spinel ig#i tried to make him look a little more ominous compared to amethio#i really like spinel#at first it was just bc he's a competent and scary villain and very fun#and also the type of guy i love to hate#but seeing more of him and seeing other's thoughts about him have made me really like him!!#i have so many thoughts#but i'll leave that there#it's getting late and i should sleep#pokemon presents tomorrow!!! yippee!!#shark's scribbles#pokemon#pokemon horizons#pkmn#art#fanart#pokemon fanart#spinel#spinel pokemon#pokeani#anipoke
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