#i'm so annoyed that this can't be the assumed base line

[crooked-wasteland]

Stolen from @pinkandpurple360 anonymous ask.

"Blitz still has a long way to go with character development”

That's great. I can't wait to never see it.

This was an issue I tried working into my Fizzarolli Dissection but it kept feeling less about the character and more an overarching writing issue, so let's just take it here.

Every bit of character development in the series is inconsistent or entirely spontaneous. Stolas being in love with Blitz seemed like a slow burn until out of nowhere in Ozzie's he is so head over heels for Blitz in specific. Asking why Blitz only now is asking him out "after all this time", like he has been waiting on and expecting it despite that never being a thought towards their dynamic before. Going from being entirely obsessed with their sexual contract and seeing Blitz as a sex object to suddenly wanting cuddles on the couch with no strings attached?

That change was never shown in the series. It was never developed. There is no character growth, they merely are different to suit the new direction to the plot.

So again, I'm so glad Blitz has more character development to go through, can't wait for it all to be implied off screen like every other ounce of character we've been gaslight into believing has "grown".

If you never show it on screen, the dynamic, the relationship, the change, it never happened. Loona at the end of Queen Bee seems to get closer to Blitz but the next time we see her she's trying to assault him. We never saw any moment of change following the end of Queen Bee where we felt her character actually develop. Even after calling Blitz dad in the episode, she ignores him in favor of strangers at the party. She expressed clear disgust with Blitz before leaving with him, and her mild softening towards him at the end could just as easily be seen as nothing at all as it could be a character growth.

However growth requires reinforcement. If you never reinforce that moment meant something, it isn't growth, it's a cheap emotional scene to get a reaction from an audience. A short scene of Loona simply telling Blitz good morning to show some kind of change was all that was needed, but it was not as important to establish change in the characters as it was to have the most cringe scene in existence. Priorities.

One of the biggest issues with the series is how blatant the meta agenda of the writing is. They never allow the space to establish characters or change, instead citing these one off moments as “proof” of story when they do not amount to anything at all. There is unfortunately a distinct difference between a story and a scene, and it is painfully obvious by how Medrano and Nylan utilize these scenes that it is entirely for a superficial effect.

The relationship between Fizzarolli and Blitz similarly is extremely vapid and has no foundation to establish what their dynamic actually was growing up. Additionally, the two scenes of them being younger are fundamentally contradictory. Younger Fizz from The Circus is assertive and confrontational. He threatens to punch Blitz for being annoying and not playing the way he wants to play. He's bossy without necessarily being mean and not only knows he's popular, but also how to utilize it as manipulation, seen in how he draws attention to himself to spare Blitz the embarrassment of his failed joke. This Fizzarolli actually lines up also with the Fizz from Ozzie's. It's hard to claim that Ozzie's Fizz was "just an act" when as a literal child he has all the same traits

Then in the Special he is insecure, timid, has very little self esteem and is an anxious people pleaser with a mousy voice. There is nothing to establish this as the same person at all, and all the narrative context clues around his popularity does not support the direction of change this character has experienced. Fizzarolli has only gotten bigger between being what appears to be six years old and what I can only assume to be thirteen based on his cracking pubescent voice and gangly limbs. All we can go on is context clues and extrapolation, but arguing of a non-existent event that humbled Fizzarolli to this extent, while maintaining his stardom prior to ever meeting Mammon, is founded on nothing, when there is a much simpler answer.

His whole personality has taken a 180 turn for the sole purpose of the episode’s narrative. Fizzarolli being the pathetic whump he is in the episode is not founded anywhere else in the show, but we need that so people feel bad for him. There is no confidence in this writing. It shows that instead of believing the character is likeable as a whole for a complex personality, the only way anyone will like him is if he is just the softest jellybean in the bunch.

It is only this way because it suits the episode right here and now. And when his character changes, it isn't founded on any concrete narrative of growth and actions having consequences, but on what the writers need to get the audience to feel a certain way. So I say it again:

That's nice, I can't wait to never see it.

[loriache]

Notes on the World Map: Melini

I'm kind of annoyed the complete World Bible doesn't have a version of the World Map with Melini filled in... unless it does and I missed it, but I literally bought it and looked at the relevant pages for this post! Anyway, I think this is the closest we have. I'm looking at this and -- Kahka Brud literally doesn't have a coast anymore. No wonder they're pissed!! Any industry involving the sea, trade, fishing, etc. is basically impossible now - you'd have to get to the coastline on the west side of the continent. That's probably miles!

Speaking of miles... how big is Melini?

This is where I got... really unwell. So first off, let's assume the official Dunmeshi World Map is a Mercator projection. I think the stage cartography in the Dunmeshi universe is at, it's going to be most important that maps are useful for marine navigation. So we can't just drop an approximate scale onto the grid and leave it at that; we have to work out where the equator is.

The way I've done that is via two places that seem like they have a close(ish) real world equivalent - in terms of climate and culture - Utaya and the Island of Wa (Toshiro's home). The Island of Wa is obviously Japan, and I've seen plausible arguments that Utaya is probably a climate/location similar to Nepal.

So, here's the (approximate) location and latitude of those places on a Mercator map of Earth:

If we arbitarily superimpose the two maps, asssuming they're the same size, we can draw a theoretical equator line that puts the two places at the same latitude, though on a different side of the equator. Putting them on the same side as Earth made the equator really low. I feel like that's ... unlikely, so we're going with this.

That puts Melini at a rough latitude of .. ~55? which would, using the same scale as the previous map, make two squares (at that latitude) about 600 miles. Very roughly calculating the size as given on the map based on that, that gives a width of (approximately) 250 miles and a length of 400, coming in at a bit less than 100,000 miles² due to the shape. Probably it's between the sizes of the UK and Aotearoa.

That really helps me visualise what Laios is working with here when I think about post-canon. Though I reckon what I've done here is "Just enough research to really annoy an expert". Sorry if you're that expert. I really don't know much about cartography <3 It's like that xkcd comic:

On distances, as someone who lives in the UK; with a car, you can get almost anywhere in a day if you're prepared to drive until late. But they don't have cars, so getting from one end to the other would take multiple days of travel. It'd take about 7 days to walk the approx "length", 400~ miles (from the top of Scotland to Liverpool) (according to Google Maps) and 2 days cycling, so probably 3-5 days with horses, depending on how you pushed them. That'd vary a bit depending on terrain, of course.

[sissylittlefeather]

Your Love's Been a Long Time Coming: Chapter 4

A/N: Please don't give up on Vivian. It's about to get so good. This is the next chapter in my series about Elvis and Vivian Choquette.

Warnings: 18+ minors DNI, masturbation (male), fantasies about oral sex (f and m receiving), fantasies about p in v sex, small mention of blood from a football injury

Word count: ~1.6k (the next one will be long probably)

If only he would love her.

******

In the morning, Elvis rolls over and reaches his hand out to find Viv in the bed. When he can't find her, he opens his eyes and sits up.

She's gone.

She must've left sometime before he woke up. He sighs deeply and lays back down. Part of him hoped they might talk or at the very least she might let him hold her for a bit. But she only seems to want that when she's been drinking. He closes his eyes and tries to go back to sleep. Maybe that'll get rid of this feeling.

******

Elvis doesn't see Vivian again until they get back to Memphis. She shows up at his house with some of the mafia members and acts like nothing ever happened. They've all come over for a game of "touch" football one afternoon. This is the first time Viv has been there when they play. He assumes she'll stand on the sidelines and be a cheerleader of sorts, but she doesn't. When it comes time to pick teams, she stands with the rest of the guys.

"Viv, what are you doin' over here?"

"I wanna play."

"No. No way." Elvis shakes his head vehemently. He knows how rough these games can get.

"What the hell? I can play." The guys all chime in cajoling Elvis to get him to let her play. It seems like they're all excited at the prospect of tackling her.

"Alright, fine! But nobody touches her."

"That's literally impossible." It's George that speaks up first looking slyly at her. Viv tries to suppress a giggle. Elvis looks between them and has to swallow a surge of jealousy.

"If you get hurt, it's your own fault."

"Yes, sir." She gives him a fake salute.

"What position do you play, anyway?" Elvis asks as a kind of test.

"Quarterback." He and the guys laugh and she purses her lips. Then she grabs the ball away from him, steps back, and throws it.

The ball sails through the air with a perfect spiral and lands about 30 yards away. Every guy on the field turns and stares at her with his mouth hanging open. Elvis swallows deeply and tries to ignore how attractive that was.

"I grew up on army bases and my stepdad always wanted a son. I know how to play football." She says sternly.

"Okay, then. You can play quarterback on the other team."

"Thanks." The teams line up for the first play with Elvis as quarterback and Viv's team on defense. The game starts and goes on without much drama until the third time Viv is on offense. Elvis is on the sidelines panting and sweating, annoyed that she's beating him. The rest of his team is annoyed too and they're tired of letting her get off easy. Without thinking, she tucks the ball and takes off running, but one of the guys gets to her quickly and absolutely pummels her. He knocks her to the ground and she gets stepped on unintentionally by several other players.

"Hey!" Elvis hollers and runs onto the field. "I told you not to touch her!"

He drags the guy up by his shirt and is just about to hit him when Viv pops up off the ground and grabs his arm.

"Elvis, don't! I'm fine!" He looks over at her as she wipes the blood from her busted lip. Her ponytail is knocked sideways and she's covered in dirt and grass. He has to fight the mixed inclination to hurt the guy who hurt her and go to her and make sure she's okay. "Let's line up again. We have two more downs to kick your ass."

He smiles despite himself and nods. She's ridiculously cute in her determination, but he knows he can't mention it. He runs back over to the sidelines and the game continues. She gets roughed up a couple more times before the game ends, but Elvis keeps himself in control. He finally calls the game over when his team is up and she yells from the sidelines.

"You just couldn't lose to a girl, could you?!"

"I don't lose to anyone!" He yells back. She laughs and wipes the blood from her lip again. He runs over to her and throws his arm around her shoulders. "C'mon, kid, let's get you cleaned up."

Everyone makes their way into the house talking and laughing loudly. Elvis takes Viv to one of the bathrooms and gets a washcloth wet for her. She dabs at her lip in the mirror while he watches.

"I don't think I need stitches. No harm done. Does it look bad?" She turns to him and pouts so he can see her lip.

Don't kiss her. Don't kiss her. Don't kiss her. He has to repeat it to himself.

"Nah, it looks fine. You'll be back to kissing my friends in no time." She pushes his shoulder.

"Yeah, you just wish I was kissing you." She goes back to dabbing her lip with the washcloth and then starts wiping the dirt off of her face. She's right. He does wish that with everything inside him. But he knows better than to push for anything.

He leaves her in the bathroom to finish getting cleaned up and goes back to the rest of his guests.

******

Eventually, everyone goes home or goes to bed. Elvis watches as Viv walks out with George and gets in his car for him to take her home. He sighs deeply and then goes upstairs to get in bed.

He changes into his pajamas and lays down, trying to ignore how empty his bed feels. He knows there are girls he could call and they'd be there without hesitation. But the one girl he wants wouldn't come even if he called her.

His mind drifts back over the day and he thinks about her on the football field: the way she threw the ball, her laugh as she ran, the way she insisted she was fine after getting demolished. He thinks about the way she pouted her lip in the bathroom to see if she was really hurt. And then he imagines kissing her. He thinks about how he could've taken her chin in his hand and then so gently pressed his lips to hers, being careful not to cause her any pain. Maybe she would've wrapped her arms around his neck and let him slide his tongue into her mouth. Maybe she would've pressed her body up against his or rolled her hips against him. Maybe she would've let his hands roam over her, down to her...

Before he realizes what he's doing, Elvis has his hand wrapped around his hardened cock, imagining Viv's long fingers on him. He pushes his pants down to his knees and goes back to stroking himself, sliding his foreskin back and forth. He groans softly and moves his hand gently, creating just enough friction to drive himself crazy. He focuses on Vivian and her beautiful body. He's held her in his arms before; it's not a stretch for him to imagine her undressed and pressed against him. His hands long to feel her soft skin, his thumbs playing with her nipples until he presses his mouth there. He can almost hear her moans as he moves his tongue on her. He strokes himself a little faster, hips bucking into his own hand at the thought of Viv, writhing and pulsing under him as he licks her clit until she reaches a climax. He swipes his thumb over the tip of his dick to collect the bead of precum that's gathered there. What would she be like with her pretty little mouth wrapped around his cock? The thought makes him feel guilty, but he grunts anyway and continues pumping himself. And oh, what it would feel like to slide himself inside her. His dick twitches in his hand at the thought. She probably has a beautiful little pussy and he wants to know what it feels like so badly that it hurts. He wants to give her the most intense pleasure, to hear her moan his name and see her face when she cums. His hand moves up and down on his cock, pinching the foreskin at his tip and rubbing it together as he grinds into his palm.

"Oh, god, Viv!" He whispers as he reaches his release and hot ropes of cum spurt out of him onto his hand.

"Yes, baby... yes, Vivian..." he whispers as he continues to cum, shuddering into his own palm. He sits and breathes for a second as his cock softens.

Annoyed and sad, he finds something to clean himself up with. Why will she fuck everyone but him? But it's more than that. Why won't she love him the way he wants her to, the way he needs her to? He'd be so good to her, if she'd let him.

But, he can't keep thinking about her like this. He needs something else, someone else. His mind drifts back to Priscilla and the letters she keeps writing to him. It's probably time to bring her here and make that official. What does he have to lose? Not Vivian.

******

Vivian rolls over away from George, who is asleep in her bed. She wishes he would leave so she could cry in peace. She seems to be right about Elvis not wanting her anymore, based on his actions today. Even when she made that joke about him kissing her, he stayed aloof. She squeezes her eyes shut to keep the tears from falling.

Oh, Elvis, she thinks. Why won't you come and rescue me from myself?

*******

Until chapter 5!

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Taglist:

@ccab @elvisfatass @elvisalltheway101 @aliypop @18lkpeters @dkayfixates @tacozebra051 @your-nanas-house @deniseinmn @joshuntildawn13 @lookingforrainbows @60svintage @littlehoneyposts @epthedream69 @louisejoy86 @rjmartin11 @from-memphis-with-love @deltafalax @jhoneybees @everythingelvispresley @returntopresley @atleastpleasetelephone @cinnamoroll-things

[dootznbootz]

A bit of a weird rant but I feel like people have to stop erasing Odysseus and Penelope's European roots. I'm tired of these extremely americanized versions of GREEK people. Don't get me wrong, I love my Americans! I've got so many got friends over there and there are genuinely great people over there. But in general I've seen Americans, and definitely not just white Americans, are most guilty of this. Europeans are just as culture-filled and beautiful people as Asians and Americans and Africans are, so why is their culture being erased for "representation" purposes? Why is European culture just a blank slate for representation of other cultures. It feels so invaliding, especially with the "White people have no culture trend". Oh, in that case the Italians, Greeks, Slavs, Germanic people, Northern Europeans and so many more just don't matter?? And I'm not talking about casting people of color in films about Greek mythology, no no no, I think that's fine! I'm just saying when adapting Greek Mythology, people should be more thoughtful of Greek culture, traditions, names, and they should have respect for it. At least enough respect to not bash their gods and their history and call it "just a copy of other mythologies" or to call their religious figures stupid names. But nooooo, people don't care because europeans BAD they did everything WRONG their cultures are INVALID and they have plague carrying rats carrying in their dumpsters 🤦 Okay the plague carrying rats joke is actually kinda funny imo but I've seen people making really racist claims about Europeans along those lines. Like holy they're not to blame for something people did 400 years ago?? Tf??

It's absolutely not a weird rant at all, I'm American and even I get frustrated and annoyed by it, I can't imagine how frustrating it is as someone who is Greek and seeing something you hold so dear and love so much becoming something completely different and taking what makes it Greek Mythology no longer feel Greek. ｡:ﾟ(;´∩`;)ﾟ:｡

Like, I literally just saw a post recently (which, ofc, people can post and create what they want... but I also get to complain :3 ) about how they would love to see a Bacchae horror movie done in modern day, (which hgoly shit, yes??? please??) but then talked about it being in RURAL AMERICA!!!

Like, I'm from rural America and I genuinely love it so so much, I love my woods, my rivers, my valleys, my small AF towns, etc. BUT IF SOMETHING IS BASED ON THE BACCHAE, IT SHOULD BE DONE IN GREECE!!! (in my opinion) Greece has plenty of Rural areas where such a film could take place!

Greek Mythology, and many other religion/mythologies as well for that matter, aren't something where I feel like it's necessarily "fine" if you change the background/culture of where it takes place, because that is most likely going to change the entire story! It's not like it's Legend of Zelda or Lord of the Rings where the setting is vaguely medieval and fantasy in nature and therefore one can change it's background/setting and it's not going to change the story too much. These myths are very central to a lot of Greece's history and culture! Changing the culture honestly WILL change the story quite a bit!

And just in general, I hate the whole joke of "The amount of misogyny here is on the level of the Ancient Greeks" and/or the stereotypes and/or just... cruelty?? that some folks have for Greek Mythology?? Or like the fact that it seems that folks will always take any sort of nuanced/complex situation and always assume the worst. ("Agamemon happily killed Iphigenia! Horrible bloodthirsty father!" when y'all, he was a MESS!) Or then making a big deal about affection and touch in Greek Texts, when that's just... that? Affection and touch. Stop looking at these texts with an American Lens!

And even just, like, researching culture and history. ;~; I've literally never been outside the US (money :') ) and while it's hard to research sometimes (I find a lot of shit that's for the perspectives of tourists, which is not what I wannttttt) it's not like it's incredibly hard to add Greek culture and life to retellings/fics!!!

Even some modern stuff and/or stuff that wasn't around during that specific era of History (can't find EVERYTHING if it's over 3000+ years old lol :') ) but slang, mannerisms, dances, etc. can be added! Even if folks DO take liberties with their stories and such, (I do!) you can add lil bits that like, "This is Greece!". It's my goal that if someone who is Greek happens to come across my Fics/headcanons, I hope to at least try to have as often as possible where they can have a "Hey! :D That's something I do!" moment.

And yes! It's sometimes hard with like, what is natural and instinctive to me as an American from rural Wisconsin. I say "y'all" a lot, it's an everyday word for me, (not normal for most Wisconsinites but it's what I personally grew up around) but Greeks don't say that and so I refrain from using it when I have characters talk to one another. BECAUSE IT'S NOT MIDWESTERN AMERICA! IT'S GREECE!!! slkdjfdslk Even if I'm writing in English, it just feels wrong to have them say that! I can't speak or read Greek but I'm still gonna try and stay with what feels true to Greek!

(I once saw a headcanon that started off good, and that I agree with as well, for Odysseus having a different accent from many of his fellow kings as he's from Ithaca (all having different accents based on where they're from but you get the gist) and with him being from small, rural island, people assume him to less well spoken like Antenor did in Book 3 of the Iliad but soon realizing that despite his rural accent that he's incredibly intelligent and cunning. Which yes!!! super fun! But then they said that he'd speak like a Cajun or an Appalachian. He's Ithacan! And would have an Ithacan accent! Rural accents exist in every languageeeee lskdjflj

Like I tend to get silly with historical context and getting subversive with characters and such. I definitely am not historically accurate in many ways and nor do I claim to be. I also tend to play around with the characters in ways that I don't think many others do (whether people enjoy it or not, I'm having fun. You'll have to rip my Water Wife away from my cold, dead hands 😤) but I think it's SUPER important to still have it feel at least a LITTLE like Greece! I'm definitely not perfect in my representation of Greek culture in my characterization and story but I think it's important to at least TRY.

Penelope telling a young Telemachus, "To have his eyes fourteen" as he goes out to play, characters moving hands around a lot when talking (something that's really fun for me as I naturally do that haha), etc. It IS possible to have these little snippets of Greek Culture in stories while still writing your own story and having fun with it!

Small things such as Telemachus, Odysseus, and Laertes doing a Nisiotika together (possibly Odyssseus and Telemachus helping support and steady old man Laertes a bit) as a lil bit of a soft "Three generations finally dancing together"

Did Mycenaean Greece have the same instruments that are often used for these traditional dances nowadays? Nope! They also wouldn't be wearing foustanellas and such, probably tunics or skirts. But it's still something that shows a lil love to GREECE. Something that is showing a little love to its history and current culture in a way. (Yes, I could do it with what is known with the dances of the Mycenaean Era, but the image of all three of them holding hands in a line, Laertes in the center as his son and grandson help support him, all of them smiling and happy. Laertes doing the footwork a little slower but Odysseus and Telemachus don't mind. Penelope laughing as she watches her family being silly together again. like?? lsdkfj It just melts my heart, okay???)

In my opinion, it's kind of like how some folks draw Penelope in a Chiton even though the Odyssey takes place in the Mycenaean era. While she would've had a layered skirt and most likely would have worn her breasts out and painted suns on her cheeks, Penelope is still Penelope even in Chiton because it's still GREEK in nature. She just got with the new fashion trends of later eras💃😂

And okay, I DID read Percy Jackson as a kid and I was really obsessed with it. I know better now (In all honesty, I was mostly attached to the KIDS and the humor) and now I'm like, frustrated with Rick Riordan. He says that he has everything take place in New York because he loves where he grew up so much, when like... THIS IS STILL GREEK! The story mostly emphasizes the whole demigod aspect than the GREEK demigod aspect ;~;

And I'm sorry to say, but Athens exists xD A BIG CITY WITH LOTS OF PEOPLE. Sure, it's still different from New York, as every city has its own culture and stuff but big cities are still big cities! Why couldn't Percy have grown up there??

I mean, I know that I for sure am having fun with putting my own experiences with my writing (Penelope being the youngest sister with so many big brothers (and Iphithime :3 ), I am very much using my own grandpa as some inspiration for Laertes (short, stocky, quiet, stubborn, loves plants, loves his wife and family, etc), I'm making Hector's Horse, Xanthos, a cremello because my horse is a cremello, etc.). I mean, I play a lot with the fact that Penelope has a lot of possible Naiad ancestry as I live near so many rivers, fishing is big in my family, playing in creeks as a kid, and just really loving freshwater settings. It's really fun and self-indulgent for me to have a small Penelope playing the creek and hanging out with her family in the rivers. BUT GREECE HAS RIVERS TOO! The Eurotas River isn't the Mississippi river, but I know that plenty of Greek folks have probably had some of the same experiences that I've had 🥹 And I've genuinely been having a lot of fun researching the natural flora and fauna of Greece for this! :D

I'm all over the place and rambley but lskdjf dsklj I almost feel like some Americans feel like it being ancient Greece makes it as though it is a completely different world and there is no way to still keep it at least somewhat Greek in nature and make it relatable. As though it's impossible for an audience to relate to cultures that aren't their own and time periods from long ago. It's so baffling to me.

[besaya-glantaya]

Thoughts on Alex being wrong and loving it

Red White and Royal Blue (2023 movie)

Remember the little quip Henry makes about admiring Alex's willingness to admit when he's wrong? It's such a great moment of foreshadowing, especially since Henry has no idea just how right he is.

Alex prizes himself on being someone who is skilled at reading people, at seeing the person beneath the surface, but he's never come across anyone quite like Henry before.

Alex must be used to people hiding who they truly are - he's been steeped in American politics for years - but he probably isn't expecting anyone from such a legacy of historic power and entitlement to be, at their core, an actual cinnamon roll.

Their initial meeting also comes at a time in Henry's life when any chink in his armour reveals only pain and anger, leading Alex to assume that what lies behind the carefully controlled façade isn't pleasant.

This assumption is only reinforced by further antagonistic interactions, fuelled by Henry's attempts to balance civility while protecting his heart as Alex consistently pulls Henry's metaphorical pigtails.

The fallout from cakegate forces them into extended periods of proximity and we see Alex start to glimpse pieces of the real Henry beneath his bland public persona. Each further piece that's revealed surprises and delights Alex and it's a joy to watch Taylor Zakhar Perez bring those moments to life.

Allow me to ramble about some of these:

1. Alex's pause of panic followed by surprised relief as Henry suavely responds to the interview question, "How did you end up on the floor of Buckingham Palace, covered in cake?" Alex's relief is two fold: he was floundering with no idea what to say (shouldn't have rebuffed Henry's request to prepare for this interview, Alex...) and Henry's answer is not at all what Alex was expecting. Henry could easily have attributed the event to clumsiness or tomfoolery on Alex's part - even just by subtle implication. That wouldn't have been out of line with some of Alex's answers (e.g., "Three words to describe Henry? Um... White, blond and British.") but Henry chooses a more protective route, deflecting attention from Alex, which comes as a pleasant surprise. [Of course he can't show this, so instead retaliates with something as annoying as possible. Cue side eye from Henry.]

2. Alex's big-eyed expression of sympathy as Henry tells him the Palace insisted on parading him around while he was grieving for his father. It's the key moment Alex realises he's built a lot of assumptions on a misunderstanding and has probably treated Henry rather unfairly.

3. Alex frowning at Henry talking and laughing with the little girl in the hospital bed. He's seeing Henry through a new lens and realises this picture doesn’t fit with a lot of his previous assumptions.

4. Alex shaking his head at Henry's joking attempt to decline an invite to his NYE party that most people would kill to get. "That's perfect, you kill me and then I won't have to go." It's the first time Henry uses his sharp wit to share a joke with Alex, rather than directing it at him in a fit of pique. It's an olive branch and I don't think Alex was expecting such easy forgiveness.

5. The sublime series of text based interactions where Alex is surprised and charmed by Henry flirting (under the guise of gentle ridicule).

6. The iconic "I can't believe how wrong I was about you," while he and Henry are as close as two people can get.

7. My all time favourite: Alex's reaction to Henry pointing out the yellow roses on his tie. Henry employs this in a sweet distraction during a moment of all encompassing anxiety for Alex. It's enough to bring Alex out of his fog, to realise how much strength he draws just from Henry being there to support him. The way Taylor says "Oh my god. I'm so grateful you are here," is perfection.

I'm a gooey mess thinking about all the future moments where Alex is surprised and overwhelmed by Henry's kindess.

[Sobs]

On a related note @mulderscully has a great post titled: Alex's headshake of Love™, which captures several of these moments, and more, in perfect gif form.

[wrestlingisfake]

I was reading this week's Wrestling Observer and Dave Meltzer went on at length about how AEW's big problem is a lack of strong babyfaces. I can't say he's wrong, exactly, but I thought it was interesting that I hadn't noticed because I've been satisfied with all the shows lately. They're clearly setting up some big face pushes, but it's a glass-half-empty kind of thing--Dave acknowledges the risk that the current plan won't succeed, whereas I'm assuming it will work based on nothing but good vibes.

AEW's problems are always a hot topic because there's a lot at stake and there's always something going on that you can point to as a sign of trouble. For example, I'm annoyed that they aren't using Ricky Starks in AEW, and nobody seems to know why. I can see their side of the GCW issue, but pulling Starks from his GCW bookings is going to make them look like the bad guys. It's exactly the sort of thing people want to point to when likening AEW to WCW in 1999, or WWE pissing away the goodwill from the Attitude Era. But people are always going to be making those arguments, and there will always be something to point to. That doesn't mean this is AEW's jump-the-shark moment.

Along those lines...I saw that someone on Twitter is revisiting the wisdom of AEW airing the CM Punk/Jack Perry footage back in April, and in retrospect it seems silly that anyone made such a big deal out of it. I don't think it helped Tony Khan clap back at Punk (which was clearly the main reason they did it), although it helped establish context for Perry joining the Elite, so it wasn't wasted effort. But the discourse framed the stunt as though it needed to be a knockout blow that would make them red hot again, or else it could only be a fiasco that would spell the end of AEW. Everything the promotion does is treated like a make-or-break decision, even when it clearly isn't.

I'm not saying AEW doesn't have real problems. They do. But the perception that any of those problems are about to kill the company is not a real problem in and of itself. Dave's right that they need to get hot again. They're working on it, but they can't turn it all around in one week. The key is to accept that there will be a lot of weeks where nothing earth-shattering happens...but that doesn't mean AEW isn't gradually making progress.

[mama-qwerty]

Okay, so I read this post, and for the most part kinda agree with the frustrating way IDW seems to be shoving Amy into the grouping by excluding Knuckles. Trying to make her into some girlboss who is on top of everything and doing that "she worries herself sick because she cares so much about everyone else" thing that a lot of media does with female characters.

And yes, I get it, Amy's character IS that she cares. It's who she is. And I like that they're pulling her back from the "girl who chases after Sonic" thing that Sega seemed to define her as for the longest time. Make her a more formidable member of the group, someone who can take care of herself and contribute. By all means, give her a little attitude that shows she can be just as dangerous as the others.

But they don't have to shove Knuckles to the side to do so.

Amy's always been strong. But the scene with Silver and the giant hammer seemed a little too strong. Teamwork, anyone?

The whole "dissolved the resistance on a whim" thing is repetitive and annoying, but I could see her point. She's a little bitter that all this was dropped on her head without warning. She stepped up because someone had to.

But I also see this from Knuckles' pov. He's a very straightforward guy. The way he sees things is PROBLEM->SOLUTION->RETURN TO NORMAL. That's the way he's lived his life.

BUT

That being said, I don't like how IDW is making Knuckles out to be Shrek, always wanting people off his island asap. In this instance, the Zombot thing had just finished, and he's already kicking everyone off?

I get that he's being gruff and that's part of his "Knuckles charm" but it could also come off as being really 2 dimensional into his character. "Oh, he's grumpy and tells people to get off his island." He's also very loyal to his friends, and wants to make sure innocent people are not harmed. Kicking everyone off like 5 minutes after they recovered from being changed into zombots is cold, even for a 'grumpy' character like him.

But okay, let's psychoanalyze him for a moment, based on these panels.

Amy cranks about Knux dissolving the resistance, and Knuckles responds with essentially "The war was over, we didn't need a resistance anymore". Which, he's right. They don't need a resistance if there's no threat to resist. What she was doing is recovery and restoration. That's not his thing. That's a different focus, and not something he's good at.

The threat was eliminated, so he saw the job as done. HIS job was done.

His next lines, about her helping everyone everywhere, could be seen as him being frustrated that she'd always taking the care of others onto her own shoulders. Maybe he sees her as too kind-hearted, and worries it'll come back to hurt her in the end. He doesn't want Amy to be hurt, but he can't come out and say that. So he assumes his gruff demeanor once again, to fall back to the "get off my island" schtick.

Look at his expression. He doesn't look angry. He looks, annoyed maybe? Resigned that he KNOWS she's gonna run herself ragged in trying to help everyone, but there's not a damn thing he can do to stop her.

Now, consider that this little exchange took place when a lot of other people were around, and he was already feeling hot because Sonic brought not only trouble to Angel Island, but a contagious 'disease' that could have compromised everything.

By contrast, look at this back-and-forth:

They're both much more relaxed, and capable of addressing the elephant in the room without their individual shields up in front of others. She pokes at him about it, and he looks honestly a little guilty for leaving her a mess to clean up. And he apologized.

I do love their little interactions, they're very sibling coded and I'm all here for it.

I don't know where I was going with this. 😆 I guess I share in the frustration that Knuckles seems to be shoved to the side in favor of giving other characters his traits and abilities (Shadow has taken over a lot of Knuckles' abilities when it comes to sensing chaos emeralds, it seems), and it's very frustrating how there is so much potential in his story, yet all we see is him in relation to Angel Island or the Master Emerald. Yes, those are important to him, but they're not ALL there is to him.

[whetstonefires]

I think you’d write a fic where Jiang Cheng has to care for Wen Yuan for some reason, knowing that he is Wei Wuxian’s adopted son. And tries to work through his feelings about Wei Wuxian, chosen sons, parents, and himself in relation to the intersections of all of the above, so that he doesn’t mess up too badly.

Hah, fantastic! I'm honestly very impressed by your command of this narrative based on secondhand information.

This is fascinating, because yeah on the face of it that ought to be something I would write, it lines right up with the kind of thing I keep on writing across fandoms, and I am admittedly very hung up on Jiang Cheng's brain. By all accounts you should have me dead to rights.

This however isn't actually something I'd be very likely to write, unless I read someone else doing it in a way that was really interesting but which I disagreed with passionately in some way. And I've just spent a while trying to isolate why.

I think it's:

1) I'm generally loath to move things around in the death-timeskip part of the story unless I'm going for a really dramatic final result, so if Jiang Cheng got Wen Yuan I'd need to work out why, and what this would cause, and it would have to be interesting. And I'd be worried about Lan Wangji and this would distract me.

2) For me, Jiang Cheng assumes his final form at the unseen moment he makes that irrevocable choice to commit to the siege of the Burial Mounds. In a lot of ways, the entire construction of Jiang Cheng's personality is all designed to bring him to that point, and make him live with it forever.

He is The Kind Of Guy who would Do That under the right conditions, that's the point of him.

That is to say, one of the major functions of Jiang Cheng as a fictional construct is that he's occupying the same niche in the my-beloved-sect-brother-became-a-dark-lord cliche that Star Wars cribbed for Obi-Wan Kenobi, but in a deconstruction of the cliche. Meaning, among other things, that his throne of lies is hiding much dirtier pain than Obi-Wan's.

So I instinctively don't want to situate a Jiang Cheng character study in a timeline where he avoided making that choice, at least not if the timeline is like that mainly to create a more functional Jiang Cheng, and that's not just a side effect. I find that unaesthetic. I could get over this aversion with motivation, but it's definitely there.

But if he's taken that damage, he cannot take responsibility for this child.

3) Okay, I'm sorry gecko, but I can't explain myself further without some reference to harm-to-children; almost entirely hypothetical but in some cases somewhat specific. You can just skip the rest of the post if you're not feeling up to entertaining that kind of scenario, or go forward warned.

I honestly do not believe Jiang Cheng, at that point in his life, would be capable of being sufficiently okay in the face of this situation to not harm the child in some way, and even trying would be self-harm on a frightening scale. I think unless you introduce some fairly enormous changes into the circumstances of Wei Wuxian's death, Jiang Cheng could not do this.

Elaborating under a cut for length, not because the references to canon-typical violence are that bad.

I can't entirely buy a Jiang Cheng characterization compatible with this scenario, and when I have seen characterizations intended to have a similar effect, they have mildly annoyed me. His inability to not lash out under strain is a defining feature; the way it interacts with his exquisite consciousness of who 'acceptable targets' are and how that list is defined is key to his characterization.

I've read a few fics doing a less intense version of this idea, and (especially if you use softened cql Jiang Cheng) it can work, but I have to aggressively suspend my disbelief to invest, in a way I can't do while writing.

The Jiang Cheng that killed this child's family as part of a symbolic rejection of this child's foster-father being his foster-brother cannot pivot to interacting with the child in basically any way at all while acknowledging the context, and not break.

I don't think he could be the one to kill A-Yuan, either, mind you, because he's not a person with all that much capacity for evil.

And like his mother, he is extremely reliant on self-vindicating narratives to hold his shit together when he does behave badly, and I doubt he could sustain one about child murder--like, he went those 13 years assuming his actions killed that kid indirectly, but I'm sure he didn't think about that ever.

I can see Jiang Cheng in a mental health crisis backhanding Wen Yuan across a room, I can see him pretending he didn't see him in a situation where that means the kid will almost certainly die one way or another, because he canonically did a more abstract version of that; I don't think he could go through with his murder, and I give him only 50% on the ability to deliberately and consciously let someone else do the deed in his vicinity, even with the most stringent political pressures to do so and even if he didn't have to watch.

(Now that's an interesting scene to write. Picks up the Jiang Cheng that held Wei Wuxian back from protecting Mianmian; picks up the Jiang Cheng who clutched the hem of his mother's skirt and begged her not to maim Wei Wuxian.)

But he could not take him home, the way his own father took Wei Wuxian home. Especially not if he had any expectation of getting to do any of the caring for baby Jin Ling, which it's popular to depict him doing but I really question if the Jin would have allowed it.

If he did take him, on some mad impulse, like if he hid an entire toddler under his fancy cloak after tripping over him in Demon Subdue Groddy Cave and smuggled him out, he would need to pass him off to some random family and never see him, if he wanted to stay functional.

...except having laid hands on him, he might not be able to completely let the kid go; Jiang Cheng has never let anything go in his life. But you can't stick a child at the back of a drawer like you can a flute. So I guess he'd stick the kid somewhere, like a couple towns over, and discreetly check up on him occasionally, like a huge creeper?

He might be able to do that, and even be better off for it, as long as he didn't let himself think too hard about it.

(This is genuinely compelling now that I've started trying to problem-solve it sdkafjskl; lmao.)

Hmm. Are his powers of denial strong enough that he could steal the baby from the middle of the massacre, after watching Wei Wuxian gruesomely self-destruct, take the Last Wen home from his own killing ground while half mad with grief and rage, and then just not think about it every time he saw this one junior disciple that was actually Wen Yuan?

I don't think they are, but it's fascinating to try to imagine what the process of pulling that off would look like.

That one would be so delicate to write but it has some fun meat, in that in this scenario, Jiang Cheng would be raising his disreputable dead best friend's son as a Jiang disciple and giving him no special treatment. Not even acknowledging him in any way. No intimacy whatsoever.

Exactly like his dad should have done with Wei Wuxian, according to Jiang Cheng's most resentful brain worms.

I don't know how that would go, and that's interesting. It's basically impossible Jiang Cheng wouldn't occasionally remember, even if he didn't let himself consciously remember, and have a fit of temper in A-Yuan's general direction. He probably wouldn't single him out as the one to hit when he got mad at the group the way Yu Ziyuan did with Wei Wuxian...or actually maybe he'd do that once and then never again.

There's basically no way Jiang Cheng doesn't do something fairly awful at some point in the proceedings, though; leaning into all the worst habits his mother taught him is a vital coping mechanism for him in this stage of his life, which means emotional violence as a routine self-soothing tool, and the threat of physical violence sort of lurking in the wings.

He's not nearly as cruel as she was (aside from however much murdertorture of demonic cultivators was actually going on, but I mean like, he's not nice to Jin Ling exactly but he also doesn't target his insecurities the way she did to him) as far as I can tell, but I think that's partly because none of the people he's really mad at are present in his daily life. And his schema for differentiating acceptable and unacceptable targets is noticeably influenced by his father's principles, even as it diverges from them at certain points.

Anyway so Jiang Cheng wouldn't be as casual about hitting even a teenage Wen Yuan as his mother was about hitting Wei Wuxian, but unlike his mother Jiang Cheng has been through war and killed a lot of human beings, so my impression is that his whole relationship to violence is more intense than hers was. He can't resort to it casually, because his instinct to stop before he goes too far can't be relied on.

...the thing is, Lan Sizhui is talented. He's not a genius but he's gifted. Even with a certain amount of shifu neglect, I think he'd be near the top of his age group. And he's about three years older than Jin Ling.

If Jiang Cheng ever saw That Kid helping Jin Ling with his swordplay or anything like that, I think he'd have a stroke.

~

So yeah conclusion I've reached is, it would be ooc for Jiang Cheng to wholly refrain from child abuse in this scenario, which it would be ooc for him to put himself in to begin with, and thus I'd struggle to write it. You could make both happen, but at that point you're cramming the narrative into a small enough space within the greater possibility space to avoid Upsetting Events that it loses dynamism.

Having thought about it this hard, I might wind up doing it anyway though lol.

Maybe like ten years later, if Lan Wangji messed up and allowed Jiang Cheng to put together the clues to Sizhui's identity and he was placed in an emergency situation where the kid needed protection? With that kind of distance from the traumatic events, he could probably handle it short-term at least.

Hmm. He'd be doing his best to compartmentalize, but it would be imperfect, with no run-up, so you could get more direct thoughts on the subject in this case....

[big-ass-magnet]

OKAY gotta do this before the action starts and my theories are irrelevant.

I went back to the scene where Gil and Higgs go into the time stop, and took a closer look at the speech bubbles, which we now know are likely to be from the upcoming time-fight.

WARNING: this is going to involve me doing some real Charlie Day red string crazy board stuff over single letters.

From the final panel of the May 21 2014 page:

There's multiple speechbubbles, and not all of these speech bubbles seem part of the same sentence, so I've broken it down.

Central speech bubble:

kill thhhee aaaabbberrr aeessss kkiilll

These "misplaced" r's are what I mean by written to sound like slow-mo talking; we have aberraess like we have talzakirng. I won't be the first one to say that that central speech bubble is almost certainly

Kill the abbess kill

referring to the traitor in the red cathedral who let Martellus escape with Agatha.

The one on the right is both upside down and backwards; I had to flip it to be able to make any sense of it.

cenn(t/i?)e--rr

I'm going to guess center.

The first line ends in 'yy', and I think the second does as well, but otherwise I can't make anything out behind the main speech bubble.

The left speech bubbles are much easier to read. Kinda.

Top:

azerrrbecknarl...

Bottom (flipped as it was originally backwards):

downn megaloxigaaar ssstree--

down megaloxigar street

I'll confess to making guesses on that last word based on the fact I know English doesn't have stp or strff at the start of any words.

Before I figured out "street" I was sure "Megaloxigar" was going to be the name of a dreen and an order to duck; so I also assumed Azerbecknarl was going to be a dreen's name or a swear word.

And I still mostly am, but now I'm also wondering if it's someone calling out the streets they're running past.

From the final panel of the June 18 2014 page. Unlike last time this seems to be all one sentence, so I lumped it together:

hehhbbbli(zzt or tzt?) i wa ssn'tt talllzzz aalkirrrng tooooo hyyu...

heh blitz I wasn't talking to hyu...

It's Blitz instead of Blitzengaard but I'm pretty confident this is being said to Martellus. I don't think we've heard anyone call him that, but it's a casual diminutive that anyone could guess would annoy him. (I hope it means something/someone is about to hit him.)

The hyu suggests a Jäger, and while it is wasn't instead of vasn't (this is what I meant about me fussing over individual letters), the Jägers' accent does shift.

Or (dare a girl dream), perhaps it's a Jäger without the accent, who has slipped up on the you/hyu before. (Please, Foglios, let Higgs return from the war Skifander.)

There is no conclusion. Here is a picture of me:

[the-cat-and-the-birdie]

Hello!! I love your blog so much!

I wanted to ask you for whenever you get a chance, why do you think Hobie doesn't like Peter B? Do you think he knew about Peter B's relationship to Miles since before The Spider Society was created and was disappointed with him not defending Miles somehow? Or something else? I find it hella interesting that Hobie DID only have something to say about Peter B but not Miguel despite everything happening in that scene.

Thank you! 💖 Absolutely.

I feel like Hobie without a doubt knows everything about what happened. And he dislikes Peter B. because unlike Gwen - he doesn't have an excuse. And she does.

And that's why

Peter B. Parker is far more toxic of a person and a mentor to Gwen than Jess could EVER be. a.k.a Peter's influence on Gwen, his trust of Miguel, and 'Why was Jessica Gwen's mentor to begin with?'

[An analysis where I yell about the fact that Peter B. left Gwen homeless instead of opening his house to her. And how he didn't step up to be her mentor. And why Hobie Brown should hit him with a guitar.]

Am I saying that Jessica Drew is basically innocent. I might be. _____________________________________________

Peter B. Parker joined the society before Gwen, because we see him with Miguel when his daughter dies. Let's keep that in mind.

Gwen is adopted into the society as an emergency recruit - based solely on the fact that she's homeless. Had her father not shot at her, Miguel and Jess probably would've left her there with him, and she wouldn't have joined.

So, Gwen joined specifically to escape homelessness. She didn't know they didn't know about the Spider-verse and the Society's distaste for Miles until later.

Imagining what that must've been like for Gwen is wild.

I bet she was delighted to see Peter B. I bet her first thought was "Where's Miles? Peni's here, you're here, I'm here, Where's Miles?"

Peter and Miguel probably had to be the ones to tell her why Miles wasn't there. Peter probably had to help Miguel convince Gwen, otherwise, how else would get her SO on board? Who is she gonna believe more, Jess telling her Miles is a mistake -

or Peter telling Gwen Miles is a mistake?

And I imagine she'd be looking at Peter like '??? What do mean????? You know Miles, this Miguel dude doesn't. Peter wtf????'

Peter was probably a HUGE influence on Gwen staying in the society and accepting their propaganda around Miles. He was the only adult she knew in a strange futuristic society. Peter was probably smiling and happy to see her, and because she trusted him and he trusted Miguel - that probably fed into Gwen trusting Miguel.

So, One reason I think Hobie hates him is his loyalty to Miguel and that influence on Gwen.

Secondly, I think it's also that Hobie knows everything that has happened from beginning to end.

Hobie's first line to Miles - "This the yungun-" implies that Gwen has told him about Miles. And I'm assuming that also includes their first meeting - as well as the other Spider-people.

Gwen met Miles and Peter at the same time, and in telling Hobie this - he learns a lot about Peter B he didn't know before. Hobie met Peter B. through Miguel. Whether he knew Peter knew Miles personally before Gwen and told him - we don't know. But he knew Peter through the Society. And Gwen came later.

Before - Peter was probably just an annoying dad at HQ. But now, Hobie suddenly had context about him. Coming from someone he cares about - Gwen. Not only do Gwen and Peter know each other - but Peter ALSO knows Miles (the Original Anomoly on Campus) and he's not sticking up for EITHER of them?

I feel like as soon as Gwen told him about Peter knowing Miles - Hobie would hate his guts.

From Hobie's POV:

Gwen has an excuse. She didn't know about Miles until after she joined, she can't leave or else she'll be homeless, and the ONE adult she knows is completely 100% in Miguel's pocket.

I feel like Peter B. is soo much more dangerous and influential to Gwen than Jessica could ever be.

And the fact that he had months to step up and mentor her but just..didn't. That speaks volumes.

Sure, Gwen admires Jess. But Gwen knows Peter, she trusts him to be a person to fight for good, because they'd done it together before. She's scared, she's alone, and she's found one person she trusts. And he says to trust Miguel.

That would absolutely be more powerful than anything Jessica could possibly do or say in my opinion.

I feel like that's something that the fandom just ignores. Peter is there, all the time. Anytime Jess is pressuring Gwen - shouldn't he be the one to watch out for her?

But when he's yelling and throwing things at Gwen it's "Aww chill out Miguel - hold my baby, you're so uptight."

Dude. Defend her.

You can't tell me "Peter didn't know that Miguel yells at kids-" OH? So where was he when Miguel and Jessica where probably disciplining her for months. Gwen walks in expecting to be yelled at, so it's not like its a rare thing.

Peter knows Miguel yells at Gwen.

PETER LITERALLY COUL'DVE JUST HAD GWEN MOVE IN WITH HIM!!!! HE HAS A HOUSE!!!!!

But instead he let her be HOMELESS, and sleep at Hobie's house.

That's. Not okay. Peter entirely in the wrong on so many levels that Jessica isn't even in the picture anymore.

I think Hobie would HATE Peter's guts. Because he has had every chance to call Miguel out, to protect Gwen, to look out for her - hell, why isn't HE her official mentor? Why isn't he the one asking her for mission reports. Instead of passing it off to the pregnant black women she's known for less than six months?

Everyone is like "Oh, Jess is so mean. She treats Gwen so mean-"

She's doing her job. That's what she sees it as. If Gwen wanted comfort from an adult - she should have Peter there for her.

But he wasn't. He expected Jessica to do that for some reason. A pregnant woman who Gwen just met.

He could've housed her. But he didn't do that. He expected Hobie to do that.

Peter saw Gwen come in homeless, scared, and depressed. And what did he do - he didn't try to help her. He hold her to trust Miguel. An adult.

And then he walks around like father of the year with Mayday - when he can't even step up for Gwen OR Miles? Couldn't even offered her a bed, or actually tell Miguel to not raise his voice at a teenager.

He didn't. But hold the baby.

I'm surprised that Hobie ain't approach Peter like - "Gwen HAS to be here, you don't. Jess and Miguel don't know Miles. YOU DO. Why shouldn't I hit you with the guitar right now? Answer quickly."

You already know Hobie don't play that. He's being nice for Gwen's sake.

'Humbling Reality Spider-man' Indeed.

[beeseverywhen]

The site manager (volunteer lackey for landlord) (usually acts like he hates me tho I strongly suspect he doesn't and has no idea that he rubs everyone up the wrong way.) came to talk to me (even tho I'd done a circuit of the nearby park after I saw him at the gate when I arrived). I'd successfully avoided him for over 6 months so was gonna happen eventually I guess lol. And he was surprisingly nice! He was still passive aggressive and kinda rude but he was only at the level he shows to everyone else and had left off the extra level he usually reserves for me.(He's harsh to everyone but usually has a special axe to grind where I'm involved.) He didn't even threaten to evict me! Just kept congratulating me on 'finally doing what needs to be done.' He did tell me about all the other ppl he's intending to evict which I suspect was an attempt to remind me that eviction is always on the table but hey! No direct threat!

Him being so nice kinda gave me whiplash tbh. First of all he's let me avoid him for months which??? Suspicious. And now he's being all nice???

Ugh very possibly overdid it at the garden today and concerned about the energy payback next week. But!!! Made massive progress in the war against the veg patch returning to grassland. Managed to water as well so hoping next batch of strawberries might be a bit healthier (at first they were the usual size but tasted pretty bland but recently they have been growing absolutely miniature and lumpy. I strongly suspect its cause they are dehydrated cause we've had no rain!!! and I've been too tired to water them at all (any watering I do manage has been going on the establishing plants and those that won't grow at all without it))

I've got celery, squashes, corn and beets all doing well and tomatoes, cucumber, celery and kohl rabi doing less well, but yes! Hopefully some will survive till harvest. No strawberries to pick this time (I didn't look tbh. They are overwhelming me lol) but loads of raspberries! They are strangely thriving this year. And I've got multiple varieties doing well (3 different colours!!!)

Thyme and rosemary are doing very well too

Flowers pretty much all died this year but there's a few that have come up themselves in the beds

[crownmemes]

House Sentences, Vol. 3

(Sentences from House (2004-2012). Adjust phrasing where needed)

"I want to know how you feel about me."

"You live under the delusion that you can fix everything that isn’t perfect."

"I'm not going to like you, am I?"

"It’s a basic truth of the human condition that everybody lies."

"If you can fake sincerity, you can fake pretty much anything."

"We went on one date. It didn't go very well."

"I assume you have a reason beyond wanting to make me completely miserable?"

"Do you know why people are nice to other people?"

"It’s all about speed isn’t it? One thing to another; never standing still."

"I'm not going to kiss you, no matter what you say."

"She's scarier than you are!"

"Why are you so curious about his curiosity?"

"You’re not happy unless things are just right, which means two things: you’re a good boss, and you’ll never be happy."

"By the way, why does everybody think you and I had sex?"

"You think I have a hypocritical attitude to hypocrisy?"

"Can't we just agree that you're incredibly annoying?"

"You're trying to objectively measure how much I value our friendship?"

"If love's based on lies, does that mean it's not a real feeling? Doesn't bring the same pleasure?"

"Do you really think this is going to end well for anyone?"

"I need to know - do you hate me, or do you love me?"

"You'd be surprised what you can live with."

"Everyone says you slept together."

"Such a hero; always righting wrongs. Who cares who you have to manipulate?"

"You're mad at me for letting you know what I did because you liked where things were going."

"If there's a screw up, it's your screw up."

"Work smart, not hard. That's my philosophy."

"I teach you to lie, cheat, and steal, and as soon as my back is turned, you wait in line?"

"For once in your life, will you shut up?"

"Did you iron your shirt?"

"Are you being intentionally thick?"

"If I never tell him, it'll never hurt."

"You can either have a life with me, or you can have a life with him. It can't be both."

"Do you think he's capable of having a real relationship?"

"Can you please be a human being for one minute and talk to me?"

"You're not ready for this."

"Knowing is always better than not knowing."

"At some point, you'll need something more. You'll need someone who can give you something I can't."

"You don't like yourself, but you do admire yourself. It's all you've got, so you cling to it."

"You're so afraid if you change, you'll lose what makes you special."

"Being miserable doesn't make you any better than anyone else. It just makes you miserable."

"Have you even read an ethical guideline?"

"You get distracted by pain. It leaves less room for the things you don't want to think about."

"If you've got a problem with a call I make, question the call. Don't make it personal."

"Gifts express guilt. The more expensive the expression, the deeper the guilt."

[randomnameless]

So considering how feudal nations work and if one is willing to focus on the lesser nobles, actual people (so not just showing Edelgard loyalists but those who dislike her too) and if Ludwig manage to escape capture, it would be reasonable to have a civil war happen?

I think it can since Hubert wouldn't just be able to get the network system of his father after murdering him, and the nobles of Adrestia are the worst in terms of opposition to social mobility and primitive form of gender equality, so the lack of civil war is stupid.

I base my thoughts on how France (I'm French too) had the Vendée rebellion and subsequent massacre and how devotion to the Church fueled support to the Spanish nationalists.

Adrestia is somehow the least interesting nation because of how it lack any of the noticeable internal strife shown, and Hubert being so effective at killing dissidents despite being only 20 (before the war) and having been at odd with many of the Seven who would actually have networks on their own is really Mary-sue ish.

I was a Edelstan at first (though I don't think too extreme) , but the more I see things, the more CF, SB and Edie annoy me (though the toxic fans are key in me stopping from preferring Edie).

Ooh!

Cher compatriote,

Thing is, Fodlan has been shown to be... not so feudal at all, especially the Empire.

I mean, Ludwig is jailed by word of the newest Emperor, when Ludwig is the PM and Edel was only the Imperial Princess at that time.

If we assume PM is just a big title (like the Fraldarius being Dukes) and in a feudal setting, Ludwig would have had a lot of lesser Houses and feudal Lords under his authority - the Emperor jails him? I can't see his bannermen - especially since this imprisonment isn't in reaction to anything he did (recently?) - just stand still and continue with their lives - how come no one reacts "wrongly" when he is jailed, in his territory, or the people affiliated to his name (maybe cousins, cadet branches, or what not)?

FWIW, Ludwig managed to escape and sort of mount a small army of men in SB... But that's nowhere what I would expect from the former PM - when we are told he was the one running things at the end of Ionius' rule - to have/raise, the number 1 of the country drops to a nobody by the heir of the puppet ruler, and apparently, the only ones number 1 can have to help him is 15 guys ?

I mean, Ferdie can have his Aegir personal battalion when he ends his paralogue (i know, it's a gameplay mechanic!) - can't we imagine the Aegir Astral Knights would have been something else than 10 dudes following Ferdie in gameplay, and be instead an entire battalion Ludwig could have used to defend himself, or at least run away with? Or imagine those knights tried to locate and liberate him from his prison in Enbarr?

Adrestia is so not developed that, as you say, it ends up being the most boring place of the three (even if I'll argue on this point : both Adrestia and Leicester are completely empty and without interest, but at least, Adrestia had some history landmarks to imagine things, when the Alliance has... Gloucester and his sheep, I guess?) - but at the same time, it could have been much more : Adrestian Emperors claim to descend from Jesus... but there's an Archbishop around (who is actually Jesus and not their ancestor (or is she?), but that's a secret!) so, to everyone who is supposed to buy the official story... Why should the CoS be administred/ruled by a random archbishop, when Jesus' direct line is still alive and kicking? Why should the Emperors share Fodlan - that was liberated by Seiros herself from corrupted people in the North ! - with the descendants of those corrupted people in the North?

The game instead gives us MAGA "Make Adrestia Great Again" with a resentment for the CoS that isn't explained (in Nopes, it's suggested the Emperor who disbanded the Southern church already was pissed with the Central Church!) and we can only guess it's either about Faerghus existing or something else...

I confess my only interest in Adrestia stems from the country being seemingly, during the WoH and post WoH the country were people are happy and peaceful etc "country of a blue lord", and then, 10 years after the end of the War of Heroes, instead of having some "and Renais was rebuilt and Ephraim became the new King of Restauration and helped everyone" we have "and then Lycaon dies mysteriously and the political situation is so "stable" that his successor duels for her throne", complete with a novel having in the background "and Adrestia still didn't leave the Roman Ludi and had northerners being torn apart by beasts as a form of entertainment"* which is, uh, very very very far removed from Marth'n'Tiki finishing their adventures and returning home.

As you pointed out, Adrestia, for what is developed in-game or mentioned about the place, is incredibly bleak and involves child prostitution, heavy class divide and an extreme misoginy in the current times... when it was created/overlooked, at least in the beginning, by Rhea herself ! When Rhea's current home is a rather peaceful place, Adrestia by comparison is a chamber pot, so what the frick happened there? 1000 years are 1000 years, but damn.

We don't have any intel about it - only mentions here'n'there that Hubert and Supreme Leader (but mostly Hubert because he can be criticised in game having a very... biased view of events and refusing to reconsider, but in the end, Adrestia... cannot be developed or have a civil war, because Adrestia isn't the focus of the story - from what we have, we already know it's a bleak place before and after Edel's coronation so... Her goal is to bring reforms to the world, but it's fitting enough that she doesn't deal with her own turf before bringing "reforms" to the rest of Fodlan.

There's also the very doylist reason of Edel having to be marketable, so in Houses, we cannot have people rebel on-screen for what happens in the Empire, else the Emperor... will not sell. Hell, Nopes had to have her brainwashed to have people react to Agarthans killing her randoms right and left, while the Nobles aren't doing a thing - always hammering the fact that "she's brainwashed so it's not her doing this or condoning this by not moving her army to protect her people it's Thales's fault".

Hubert being hyper-competent is an assumed trait at this point lol, unless he really really works with the Agarthans who lend him their tech and spy reports and whatnot. FE isn't a "realistic" as, say, ASOIAF, but without Hubert, Adrestia doesn't function and Edel's plans don't work so Hubert is both a McGuffin plot device (apparently he can pinpoint shambala because Thales fire nukes? Without access to any satellite?) and the character we all love.

Given how Supreme Leader planned her coup coronation and subsequent attack on GM - especially since Leopold already was in her pocket during the mock battle - I'm pretty sure Hubert, or Leopold's army or hell, some of her "allies" already envisaged this, and had either Aegir's "close allies" Hubert'd or monitored.

Or worse, imagine a scenario where Aegir runs to his friend Varley to explain him what happened, how the Emperor sent an army against him to usurp the throne and how they must warn everyone and Leopold to raise the army against her... Only to have Varley reveal he is now the Bishop of the Southern Church, and Leopold sided with her since the beginning...

I know it's not comparable, but Seteth (or some nuns?) mentions how he hasn't heard a thing about the faithful in the Empire... so either they were killed because they were practicionners of the Seiros faith, or because they rebelled/protested against the war and were, uh, disposed of (tfw the games never care about telling us who were the humans used to create the various imperial demonic beasts we see).

FWIW, I have a plotbunny idea where someone pretending to be Hresvelg bastard - with a crest of Seiros - wants to ask for Nopes!Rhea's help to support his claim to the throne, since Supreme Leader declared her war against the Church, he can put an end to it if he becomes Emperor, right? The CoS is torn between accepting "it would create at least some instability in the Empire, so the Kingdom could breathe a bit and maybe use this opportunity to finally fend them off if the Emperor calls back her troops in Enbarr" and "the CoS doesn't meddle in the affairs of humans like succession issues and only does so if it's to prevent a war but here you want us to create a civil war??"

*it's a novel so historical accuracy isn't that high, and yet, even if it's a porn book, why adding this detail in the background - just like people listening to music - I doubt it was written by a Faerghian writter so what, was this detail "northmen were slaughtered by beasts in the background and it was very funny lol" added just as a background thing, like fish being served as a meal ("historical" detail that might have been true!) or...?

[pempeeeperem]

ok so thank u for pointing my attention to those lines.

BECAUSE WHAT DO YOU MEAN GETTING HUNGERIER WHY ARE YOU HUNGRY FOR SYLVIA FINN? SEEMS LIKE HE WANTS TO DO A DIFFERENT KIND OF EATING IF YOU KNOW WHAT i'M SAYING.

Also two more things before I go back to replaying Potionomics again because I have an addiction

when you touch a sharks nose it kinda makes them go dumb and stop moving to make it simple because it's a sensitive area for them, so I think i'd be funny if Finn and Sylvia get into an argument over something stupid, Sylvia would touch his nose to make it so he has to listen to her, cause, he can't move. for example

"Minnow, cmon it ain't that big a deal" Finn studied Sylvia's annoyed expression, furrowed brows, and a puff of exasperation?

He's sleeping on the couch tonight

But he's pulled from his thoughts when he notices Sylvia right in front of him and right before he can ask her what she's doing he goes almost slack, barely standing up right.

"Now you have to listen to me!" Sylvia said, her smile turning into a smug smirk.

their arguing about how Finn cheated in their game of itsy bitsy Kaiju btw

2. what does Finns house look like? cause we know he has one based on the tv hangout but like, it's never described, ALSO WITH THAT MONSTER OF A TAIL WOULDN'T NORMAL CHAIRS BE DOWNRIGHT PAINFUL TO SIT IN? my guess is he just opts for stools instead of chairs but what do you think

3. I have more, I lied >:D but anyways, just like their noses, Sharks gills are sensitive too, but it's a more pottant version of the nose thing, were if the gills are hit or touched the shark comes to a full stop so liked Imagine this Finn is snuggling with Sylvia but he keeps moving his heavy ass tail onto her to mess with her. and she has enough.

"Ok thats it, no more moving for you" Sylvia declared, moving her hands from resting on Finns back to his neck where his gill rested. Finn now realizing what his girlfriend was about to do, tried to bargain with her.

"Minnow, Minnow, no need to stun me, I promise I won't rest my tail on you again" Finn did his best to make his case, however Sylvia didn't buy it, and lightly tapped his gills on each side, stunning him for a minute or two, which gave her enough time to move his tail off her, and to snuggled up again, resting her face on the comfiest pillow, Finn's chest.

ok thats all for now, also I request a name 🐟 Fish anon 🐟 pls just so you know who I am. :D

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

But in all seriousness, Finn has some huge physical disadvantages - if you somehow pull off triggering his tonic immobility reflex (the nose thing) or manage to touch his gills (I mean, he's huge) - for Sylvia to take advantage of that... makes me shiver.

I can see that being funny if it happens by accident, but if Sylvia was to purposefully use that knowledge against him... not good. Very icky. Not cute.

I do like his nose a lot, it's so different from human noses. If Sylvia was to touch it because she's curious... well, I could see that leading to an awkward, possibly panic inducing moment when Finn not only relaxes but goes completely still, slumps into himself or the couch and Sylvia scrambles to call a doctor.

The same happens, btw, if you flip a shark on its back. It goes still, breathing slows down and sinks. It's fine and goes back to its usual self in a few minutes, but uhh yeah. Finn can't sleep on his back anyway, so good luck flipping him.

I can't imagine it being very comfortable for him to lay or lean against the tail much. Will it fall asleep like an arm? The weight pulls on his shoulders, so I think settling it down is an instant relief. And I can't see him drag his tail on the floor, he's too spick and span for that. Rather I imagine he rests the tail on clean surfaces if he can, much like one would an arm or a leg. So, for furniture it would make sense if they have a soft backrest or an armrest that he can drape it over. I assume he has a couch or a sofa on which they watch TV, since the seat is big enough to cuddle on.

If you hang out with the cats and play pranks, we learn that Finn lives in a "shack." Which is not very helpful, especially since I can't see him living in one?? I thought he has money, why would he then live in what sounds like a rundown house? If I remember correctly, it's a seaside shack, perhaps on the beach close to his pep talk shop?

Makes the whole idea of them moving together more difficult. No space in Sylvia's shop, but neither in Finn's shack!

It's probably a learning process for both, finding out what is alright to touch and what not. I mean, is touching the tail like touching an arm or is it more intimate? What is the significance of him draping the tail around her as they kiss? Does Finn know that the skin on her neck is sensitive as well, regardless of gills? What about the webbing between his fingers, is it uncomfortable to link fingers while hand holding or is it imperceptible?

[laststandx3]

I think there’s a case for “heather could have stopped tozer from joining the mutiny,” a big part of why he joined seems to be that hickey could use his grief over heather to convince him that crozier wasn’t looking out for the marines

Exactly!!! very real case!! this why i'm here screaming about it in polls.

Because Heather was THAT important for Tozer than after he died (in an horrific way) Tozer wasn't the same man anymore.

And of course Hickey took advantage of that grief, but what if we have the same story and the only thing we change is that Heather survives? There's still a monster hunting them, there's still the arctic cold around them, there's still people that burned alive at carnivale.

If Heather is there with Tozer after Carnivale there are still point that one can make against Crozier's leadership. There is still a base for a mutiny. To try and save your skin because so far the captain hasn't capitaned much.

Personally I think both Tozer and Heather would have joined the mutiny. And this comes from the fact that they're really close and that we actually see Tozer advocating (in a way) for the marines before Hickey got any chance to even think of a mutiny.

and let's assume it wasn't Heather the last victim of the Tuunbaq. It was another man. There are already dead marines who don't really belong in the expedition.

Tozer is making the Heather is strong speech, yes but he's also pointing out how none of them choose to be there. It's a vent out of fear for his life, for his close friends life. but it's based on a belief he already had. They had no choice, that they had no extra pay, that they were the first line, first to cut down (an acceptable sacrifice because their job as put them there)

If Tozer had these beliefs before the mutiny there's no reason that someone very close to him wouldn't share them.

And Hickey overhears it and that is why he can get Tozer in the mutiny, because they have the some common knowledge that command isn't looking out for you.

Now an extra because I'm obsessed with scenes nobody talks about:

When Sir John visits the marines waiting for the Tuunbaq. You can say whatever you want about sir John but the one thing he was good at was approaching the men. He's always kind, constructive and positive. He's was a man of politics after all. So when he visits the marines he brings them booze, makes jokes and compliments them on their cleverness of using the rats as bait. They take a picture for posterity and like a good politician now that he showed up and did nothing he can go back to the safety and warmth of his ship. Franklin doesn't want to freeze his ass any longer. Already about to shake hands. Then Tozer stops him : Then sit with us Captain, why don't you? Perhaps it can be you who fires the shot that will convince it [Tuunbaq]

Heather: At least be here to see it felled

script dialogue. that tells us that Franklin gets touched by the offer, it leaves us no indication on how to understand Tozer's offer. So when he invites Franklin to stay, my interpretation is that he does it out of being a little annoyed at his boss. Have you seen how Franklin moves around? He has the pose of a man who's never lift a finger in his life, can you imagine him firing a weapon? can you imagine him firing the striking shot? You can't tell me that Tozer invitation is genuine praise for his captain. And then Heather who sees that Tozer aimed to high with Franklin's vanity reframes it a little. (have you ever told a lie with your bestie and they sort of adjust your version of the story?) This is why I think that Tozer and Heather share at least the core idea that pranking your boss it's a good thing to do there's a gap from the marines and anyone else there. They are technically the ONLY ones who give Franklin's authority a lesser weight. You can't imagine this little prank made by anyone else. To everyone else the captain is THE authority and they would never ever imagine that authority wouldn't see thought you. But Tozer and Heather do. they don't owe Franklin/command anything because they're not there looking for glory, the country, or an hawaian vacation. They're there because they got assigned to the job. And they do feel the gap between them and everyone else, and when there's an us and them than it's enough seed to start a mutiny.

[lazyvase]

Dear, @purplekoop

GRRRR RAHH War Bots is consuming me! I keep finding myself thinking about the far off hypotheticals and all the little extraneous details:

What would box art look like? So far I can see Wilderoad and Calber staring at each other from the corners of the art. A random map from the game is the background. Other bots from the game are all rushing towards each other ready for a fight.

What kinds of PvP maps will there be? One idea I had is an abandoned amusement park based on a once-beloved-but-now-forsaken gaming company that is now being used for training.

Also I had the potential* headcanon that the PvP gameplay is the War Bots** training.

*(I say potential because i don't know if you already had that idea. I don't want to assume.)

**(Not to be annoying myself. But I know that War Bots is not the final name of the game nor the team. I just wanted to make that clear real quick. Sorry if this sounds rude. I genuinely don't know how to phrase this without sounding like an asshole.)

What will the trailer look like? I can see a rough draft. A little rendered animation of showing Wilderoad walking onto a PVP map. Chaos is everywhere. We then get quick clips of gameplay footage of characters using their abilities. The obligatory pop song playing in my head bounces between "Cut Off" by Set It Off and "Magic 8" also by Set It Off. (I listened to the album these songs were in recently while I had War Bots on the brain)

By the way, I see Wilderoad as the face of War Bots mainly because they were literally the introduction to it, and if I remembered correctly, they were also one of the first characters made. And if i'm remembering REALLY correctly, I believe you yourself said they were the face.

What will the cosmetics be like? This question really started when you mentioned the quickly scrapped penguin's moveset being given to Velenna. I instantly thought "Alright, Velenna should be given a penguin skin then." Then i realized that I don't recall you ever mentioning cosmetics. Would it be more TF2-esque with a loadout system? Or would it be more Overwatch 2-esque with a simple complete skin system? Speaking of Overwatch, I couldn't help but think of an "Ancient Heroes" skinline that gives our favorite bots a familiar look. Some mappings are rather cut and dry, while some really get you to think (Poppett in particular: Tracer? Lucio? D.va? Kiriko????). I also briefly imagined a "Coat" mechanic of sorts. Where you could merely change the color of the bots bodies. Like putting on a new coat of paint. (As you can see, I'm kinda using War Bots as a cope and a way to wean me off of Overwatch. Or at least attempting to.)

What would the community jokes and memes be like? What would be our nerf Genji? I can already see a meme about Necross, but I won't since I plan to make that one a reality eventually.

Bot Select? I want to see all the bots lined up in rows and columns.

Of course. What game would be complete without your favorite thing: figures! Not to make you drool, but imagine if a Wilderoad figure was right there on your desk. Or Formann? Or Poppett? Or Velenna? Or Navea? Or etc etc etc.

It's all so just- GRRRrrr OHHHhhh, so enticing, so magical, so beautiful. I'm proud to say that I'm on the ground floor of War Bots. I love being a part of this. I can't wait for what comes next.

Sincerely, G

PS: I have absolutely no idea when the rest of The Gardeners posts will be finished. I have solid ideas on all of them (minus one). I just haven't had the time to write them. This week I'm focusing on a big midterm and have the usual load of homework. I'm trying to get a lot done this week so Spring Break I can truly relax and write to my hearts content. Of course, the biggest roadblock to my writing is that I'm busy writing a script for my university's comedy skit program club. And that has a deadline of the week after Spring Break. So yeah. Sometime after that I suppose. I will let you know that the next Gardener I'll be going over is the one with blades.

Thanks for listening to my ramblings!