#i’m still incoherent

[frnkiebby]

okay and last here’s The Killers set. (stitched vid also up on youtube bc yk it’s long. and the vid that’s purely somebody told me)

i died. was deceased and came back with a vengeance bc i finally got to see the killers. i would have recorded mr brightside but they played it as an encore and i was already mid religious experience.

the. fucking. killers.~🎃

[timethehobo]

A missed apology.

[maumausie]

Am I the only one who thinks about how impersonal Bell’s death was?

Like, from their perspective, the man who’d been their best friend for decades, fought alongside them, betrayed them. Even if they had some time to process it between the interrogation and Solovetsky, it had to have hurt.

Especially because he didn’t even give them the decency of an intimate death. That was phrased weird but let me cook.

It was just a bullet wound. He didn’t even give them an emotionally charged death. Not even point-blank. Adler was standing few feet away from him. I feel like they would’ve been more content if they’d been, say, stabbed or strangled. Because at least then they’d know Adler felt something towards them. But Adler didn’t do that. He downed them like he would’ve any other target. Quick. Disinterested.

Even after giving up everything, he still took more. He put them down, just like what he thought they were. A dog.

[wellwhatnowlove]

The longer I sit with the ending of Wind and Truth, the more I think it’s really funny that

🚨WIND AND TRUTH SPOILER RAMBLING BELOW🚨

Kaladin is just hanging out with Chana, with absolutely no idea that she is Shallan’s mother. Because like… he has a weird amount of information about the Davars…. Like about Shallan’s dad and the abuse in their home and also he killed Helaran… who is apparently a bastard… but still viewed Chana as his mother…. And also if Chana was at Shallan and Adolin’s wedding.. do we think she knows how close Kal is with her daughter?? I keep imagining Kal putting the pieces together during a therapy session with Chana and the dawning realization of just how INSANE Shallan’s secrets are or even wondering if Shallan KNOWS that her mom is a herald and also like NALE TOLD CHANA THAT IF SHE DIDNT KILL SHALLAN THEN HE WOULD and that’s not completely related but like HOLY SHIT. and okay fine I could sit on this for 7 years and still not have time to unpack all of this.

THE MORE YOU SIT WITH IT….. THE WILDER IT GETS.

Or MAYBE ITLL NEVER COME UP. AND ITLL ONLY COME OUT WHEN THEY ALL HEAD BACK FOR THE DESOLATION AND SHALLAN WILL LOOK AT CHANA AND BE LIKE “hey mom:)” and Kaladin will be like “😶” …. Assuming Shallan somehow gets out of Shadesmar or like idek who has what information or if anyone has any information? I have no clue but i am sure having fun with it.

Gosh THIS IS GOOD SOUP.

[dreamingthroughwords]

wulian fucks me up you have someone so devoted and in love and you have someone who can’t let themselves accept it or even feel at all. but that one who is devoted stays so anyways, and refuses to leave the others side, and defy their requests that come from a place of self-hate. because wuming will always remind xie lian of who he is even when xie lian himself doesn’t want to be reminded ‼️that in itself is the truest devotion and loyalty of all

[myokk]

For writers:

What’s your favorite piece of writing you’ve done, and why??

Idk I just woke up thinking about this & now I’m curious!!! & may or may not be compiling a tbr based on your responses since I really haven’t had the time to read any hl fics yet🫶🫶🫶

[specific-dreamer]

daryl!johnny sounds older. i don’t wanna say more mature but he sounds like. yk he sounds like the real johnny. not the johnny pony sees, not the johnny that the gang sees, or a soc sees. but the real johnny. johnny who’s a 16 yr old kid who just killed somebody, johnny who alongside his best friend is wanted for murder. his best friend who’s always been a little wise for his age but, he’s really acting his age now. he really looks like a child now to johnny. daryl!johnny who’s parents hate him but even still he’s never really had to take care of himself and someone else because the rest of the gang were always ready to jump in. daryl!johnny is suddenly forced to be in control, forced to make sure they’ll be alright because one look at pony and johnny can’t bring himself to make him do anything. daryl!johnny who forgets he a child too for a moment. daryl!johnny who knew the whole time that pony was never going to run away, he loves his brothers too much, and johnny knew how much it was returned. all he can think abt is he’d loved it if his parents were even half as worried as pony’s brothers. all he can think about is that it’s his fault ponyboy can’t see his brothers, it’s his fault they’re in hiding, ponyboy didn’t do nothing. johnny may not have a family who’d be this scared or worried so he’s no reason to go home, but who is he to stop pony from being able to see his brothers.

i strayed so far from the plot BUT daryl!johnny is the real johnny. he’s not the “puppy of the gang”, sure he looks young and the way he carries himself doesn’t help, but he’s not 14. at the end of the day, he’s the same age as soda ace and steve. he’s just as mature as they are. daryl!johnny is the johnny that remembered to buy soap, he’s the johnny that stands up to dally and is on equal footing with him. daryl!johnny is the one who’s dad beat him with a 4x4 and didn’t cry. daryl!johnny is the johnny who’s been jaded and quiet snd thoughtful and overall a lot more reserved since bob first jumped him.

[gojoest]

this new official art by gege is my roman empire ngl

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

so… i met miles last night 😭😭

i’m still trying to formulate the words to express how special it was to meet him and how unbelievably lovely he was. i mean, i obviously already knew how lovely he is - but getting to experience it in person is truly something else altogether. he just absolutely radiates good vibes and warmth and truly feels like sunshine in human form ☀️ i also loved that because i tend to be on the quieter side in these situations (after telling him how amazing the show was my brain went pretty blank lol), he actually asked me questions about what songs i’d most enjoyed etc and really engaged with me and also gave me the LOVELIEST hug 🥹

if possible, meeting him has only made me adore and respect him even more than i already did (truly quite an impressive feat), and i just feel so unbelievably grateful to have got to witness the smile on his face when i told him how much i’d loved the show 💖

[zishu-arts]

I know everyone likes Agent comforting Victim, but I kinda wanna see Victim comforting Agent. I kinda like the angst that he blames himself and manz doesn't rest because of it 🙃.

anon i COMPLETELY agree. i mean ik vic is sad cause his wife died (“i miss my wife agent i miss her a lot”) but i feel like agent literally watching her die before his eyes is a little overlooked. sick of relationships where it’s almost reduced to therapist-patient(which ik is a stretch for most of the depictions of vic and agent but) — there are good agent angst don’t get me wrong but there should be moreeee

like maybe they were friends. maybe they were all in a poly relationship. maybe they were nothing more than coworkers. but even so they knew each other and cared abt each other. agent watched her die and could do nothing about it and he was supposed to protect them — he was the guard. he was meant to protect and he failed and in this essay i will *gets shot*

[velvetjune]

Jesse would probably have the same reaction to Saga’s profiling as Tor or Odin, being able to directly communicate, which would lead to the best situation of both of them just staring into space while they’re silently and psychically communicating at random times

[timethehobo]

Sketchy thingy. It’s literally releasing this week ahhh.

[dragonologist-phd]

i’m sorry what the FUCK is that armor

[drivebyanon]

Me, coming into Tumblr, all excited to spoil myself a little in the Bucktommy tag before watching the episode:

Wow. What terrible timing to have a breakup like this (at least for our side of the fandom) when we all just want (desperately need) love and hope.

Saying that, I have a different perspective than most but please mind you, I haven’t read the interviews and I’m an overly optimistic person. I’m hoping this is NOT the end.

This is 911, they love to torture their characters and their fans and I’m not convinced it’s over. Some things I am considering:

Oliver has hinted recently about how will they/won’t they make the best stories so I kinda knew something might be coming

A major Abby bomb was dropped and that was just going to be it? They really decided to go there after all our joking about it. And that is it? 🫤 There is more story to be told. Especially how Tommy Freaked the Fuck out! We need, dare I say deserve, a deeper conversation.

People have ignored the Glee conversation with Josh. How silly it may seem, it is important because yes, there was two different realities for lgbtq+ people before and after acceptance became more mainstream because of shows like Glee & Drag Race. Tommy as an older gay man who lived closeted, especially under the misogynistic tyrant of Gerrard, is a wounded bird. And so he reacts like one, by protecting himself from more pain. He can’t seem to accept that Buck would want him forever. He’s afraid. He’s just waiting for Buck to leave him. It would be such a loss if the writers didn’t address these story plots they just dropped in this episode. To really tell this story of what it was like to exist before Glee.

Buck went to old patterns. He is afraid of losing someone so he jumps right in to moving things forward fast, 0 - 60 in 5 seconds. “Will you move in with me.” Right after dropping the Abby bomb? Like come on man! That’s enough to make anyone’s head spin.

@dianaflynn22 pointed out that the parallel storyline was Maddie and Chim. Need we remind people that the 1st season Maddie arrived she became friends with Chim, decided to date him, got kidnapped by her crazy ex and then took a break dating Chim before the season even ended. The road to love on this show is NEVER smooth. I mean come on, even Hen and Karen broke up for awhile after she cheated!

We also haven’t talked about THE dinner date. That was filmed awhile back and we all know was supposed to be reflective of how they began. And once again they were interrupted, and once again Tommy’s insecurities reared their ugly head. Because even if he denied it, he was jealous, he was worried, he remembered what happened with Eddie before (PTSD much).

Apparently Oliver hints at Buck going back to his old ways? I hope I’m not wrong about this, but I think he will fail spectacularly. He’ll try and realize he has moved forward. Am I being too optimistic? Most likely yes. I would like this to push him forward to to confront Tommy and be like “What the hell! You’re a self-sabotaging moron!” And have the real conversation/argument that’s needed. And Tommy needs his own “Come to Jesus” moment. Maybe for once he needs to fight for his own happiness and fight for Buck.

And now that I read this all back and think about it, this was an episode not about Buck but about Tommy’s demons, his failings at his engagement, his emotional shutdown, his insecurities, his self-sabotage. For a show that’s going to move on from this character, they sure set up A LOT to build upon with Tommy.

So I am hopeful that this is not the end. That this is the story they always meant to tell and they are dragging it out. 😬🤞🏽Sometimes I wish Pandora kept that damn box closed because hope can be a cruel creature thing.

[zazrichor]

A heavily condensed process video of my latest piece. Since I didn’t think it’d go anywhere near where it went, I only hit record a little way in. This is 30 hours in 30 seconds and a little test whether I should upload the full 25 minutes ghghghfh so I thought I’d do a little no-nonsense poll on this

[wickmitz]

any thoughts/opinions on vikdecai?

i don’t believe i have any complex thoughts that haven’t already been said by the community at large! mostly my opinions just correlate to a very fond i like them, since mordecai kneecapping viktor in order to save himself from having to hurt him later is really one of the first things that humanizes his character. makes you realize he’s not nearly as cold or practical as he tries leading you to believe -- a front that unravels further given his atlas obsession. and i like that! my favorite thing about mordecai is his subtle longing for the lackadaisy crew, how much he doesn’t wish to hurt them, and how venomously he loathes his current life … what he’s doing now isn’t what he wants to currently be doing, but merely what must be done for his goal, one which is already layered in lackadaisy sentiment. so his bond with viktor is important to me, given how much it highlights this inner struggle and earnest truth within his character. but then again, this can also be applied to mordecai’s relationship with mitzi, atlas, and ivy, so let me discuss them in a more romantic sense. which i’m sure is what this question is trying to get at!

romantically, i view mordecai and viktor’s dynamic as … favorable? it’s entirely plausible there were feelings there, an intimacy only they shared as men inside atlas’ arsenal, people who were entirely knowledgeable of the lackadaisy’s nasty underbelly. it’s their slaughter of people deserving and of many, many innocents that help their boss’s speakeasy run, and this violence ( this constant watching one another’s back ) would only breed closeness in spite of the horror it’s built on. and, of course, they have core things in common outside of their job and efficiency for bloodsport! like their love for family, their devotion towards those who matter most, and how out of place they equally feel on this soil - - in this world and era, where everything feels like it’s out to get them in some way or another. their ability to connect beyond their surface level traits and quirks ( mordecai and viktor are very much opposites on their surface, and they have a habit of bickering about these differences, albeit lightheartedly ) demonstrates the profoundness of what they have and what they’d do to protect it. they care for one another in little gestures, insignificant to most but in a way that truly matters to them … as they can see the genuineness in it, since they’re putting themselves into the careful actions and aren’t just doing things for politeness sake. for example, mordecai tries adorning them in matching cloth so they’re two equal halves, symmetrical, and then we have viktor who pocketed mordecai’s glasses to give him later when they were done with their mission. i like to imagine there are more things like this in their relationship! stuff that isn’t as severe as life or death, like saving your friend’s skin by a mere inch or dragging each other to a finish line every day. any of atlas’ men can offer that. it’s the extra things, done out of agency and personal desire, that bring them closer than any other regular joe on atlas’ payroll. it’s rather clear that they were close canonically, and that viktor was perhaps mordecai’s closest friend in a way that atlas could never be due to the pedestal he was constantly put upon. and while we have less insight on viktor’s feelings, i’d imagine the betrayal has never, and will never, fully heal. it is not a wound he can easily patch up, and it isn’t something one could just forget either. how can you dismiss someone who used to be your hands and eyes and ears? when you two functioned as another man’s extra body in your entirety? you may as well have shared a mind when out on the field, and that’s a closeness and a trust which is hard to lose. viktor hardly lets anyone in as is, just as anti social as his spectacles wearing companion, so to lose that in such a violent was is an unspeakable pain he bears, i’m sure. mordecai took whatever remained of his life from him with that shot. he’s permanently robbed viktor the ability to defend the last few hairs he cares to protect. his purpose is now up in the air. and all this anguish from someone he completely and utterly believed in … there is a lot of hurt, is what i’m saying. a hurt that’s too deep and life altering for it not to be supremely personal too. it’s deep and festering and viktor ignores it, and mordecai ignores it, mostly, but sometimes his paw strays near his wound and he itches at it, and it reopens the ache all over again. there is metaphor to be found there! an abandonment and a departure that leaves you bloodied from maiming or being maimed. it is very easily a multi-layered sentiment!

however, i could still take this or leave it romantically, hence my earlier statement of favorabe rather than unabashed gushing and swooning. this is a ship i like, but i don’t read mordecai as crushing on viktor per se? i’ve always viewed his extreme relationship with atlas as puppy love that’s half bred from devotion, something not entirely genuine but also still genuine enough, which makes for a nice parallel between that and rocky’s bond with mitzi. his rivalry with atlas’ wife and his oddities such as wearing his boss’s shirts read as girlish crush behavior, typical things one does when believing themselves enamored, you know? naturally his views and feelings for atlas aren’t quite that simple nor easy to parse, and i’m not trying to simplify them in any way! i just believe he had a torch for atlas, and thus didn’t carry another for anyone else, at least not as intensely. whatever feelings he might have for someone would always be second to atlas, who was his very reason for living and breathing every day, who was his answer and justification and eventually? his obsession. in many ways i think mordecai was too wrapped up in atlas to properly develop feelings for viktor, even if there were inklings of something inside of him. ironically, the term something is what i love using when thinking about him with viktor or mitzi. mordecai is something with those two, he feels something, an unlabeled sort of thing he can’t really reach -- perhaps he doesn’t even want to, scared of what it might mean, what it could say. and it is different somethings! they are not the same feeling, what he feels towards those two, but it’s not fully known to him in the way that his feelings towards atlas was. it is not as clear! especially now, with things as awful as they are and with mordecai so full of turmoil he’s forcing himself to not share. he also has an intense aversion to emotions, obviously, which doesn’t help matters lol. this man could find some of the closure he’s so desperately seeking if he took more than a glance inside of himself, but then he wouldn’t be apart of this tragic tale, now would he?

still, in a better world where the lackadaisy’s gaggle of traumatized characters are allowed healing without any casualties or major losses, then i’d enjoy seeing a viktor and mordecai slowburn. where they decide to remain steadfast by each other’s side like once upon a time before, and they deal with life as a unit. maybe when given the space for it, mordecai’s affection can finally cement into real love for viktor -- the romantic kind, something sappy and disarming and maddening all at once. maybe viktor will allow such indulgences, finally able to touch upon his heart again and use it in a way that he hasn’t gotten to in a couple ages. or maybe he won’t share the specific feelings that mordecai possesses for him, but he’ll enjoy creating an entirely new thing that’s only for them : he can compromise and he can bend if mordecai is willing to bend just the same. they certainly wouldn’t be your typical couple, their emotions too stunted for regular dates or typical pda, but there’s something more special and intimate to them carving out their own space, and thus having their own secret world. a mix of platonic and romantic affections, a healthy dose of selfishness and desire they couldn’t ever have before but now can hoard so entirely, in small bearable doses. and there will always be some things they both won’t ever be able to shake ( mordecai disabling viktor, atlas, viktor’s daughter, etc ), although they could manage these aches and guilt better together, which is the exact sort of happy ending i’d want for them. if i may be so indulgent myself haha ( <- person who knows lackadaisy’s ending will be mostly dark and tragic but likes playing around with hopeful scenarios and what-if’s regardless! )