#i wont let you get you get in my way tumblr
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Announcement: The side blog @circusmxnkeys has been....shadowblocked. I, Uraume, have been temporarily hired to manage all administrative affairs, take messages, and handle replies. This includes plots. Thank you for your patience while we battle to retrieve all of Kenjaku's hard work and dedication. It seems that Kenjaku's plan backfired. He's trapped in the creepy eyed rubix cube instead.
EmOtionAL dAMaGE!!!
#i wont let you get you get in my way tumblr#sugu will return#alex is in a lot of emotional pain#emotional DAMAGE#OOC#save#announcement#update
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#....well#here we are again#'hello tumblr notes my friend#ive come to vent in you again'#i need the universe to Leave Me Alone#today my credit card got hacked#got it cancelled and set up to get a new one#but then when I went to use my debit card it wont work either#i have no way to pay for gas#and I cant call to see whats up till the morning#and my apartment door's automatic lock wouldn't let me in either#im in now but at this point in afraid to leave this room tbh#gosh im tired#i really hope things can just go easy with the credit card company tomorrow#cuz i dunno what im gonna do otherwise :(
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i am genuinely very sad about the way the anime characterization of akutagawa has seeped into the fandom (and is also made worse by fandom) for many many reasons but also it's a shame given that bsd fans really love insane yaoi and i think people tend to overlook how fucking weird akutagawa is about atsushi
#sskk#making a fandom post because this is what my life has come to#it's sad though it really is. akutagawa has a lot of really interesting complexities and little human traits that people don't seem-#-interested in engaging with. let him have his sweets and his antiques and his calligraphy and bitch about turning lights off#oh my god what the fuck is this new tagging system my fucking Grammarly widget is in the way#tumblr im gonna kill you#anyway. im complaining about akutagawa bc im of the silent rabid dog proclivity but atsushi arguably gets this worse#i wont write fanfiction. i wont. i wont. i wont. r#let's hear the details#bsd
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Don't mind me, I'm just fucking depressed
#life feels meaningless again and i don't know how to make it go away#i have friends but i cant find the energy or the mental ability to be around them#i cant even get myself out of my house let alone see people#ive got no car again which means you habe 0 autonomy#the VA has zero empathy for anyone and im left stranded for help#ive got my parents winter depression to deal with on top of my own#I'm basically the primary bread winner in my house because of my disability being more than my dads SSI#everything is breaking and i have no money to replace it#my country hates me in multiple ways#my avenues of enjoyment are being priced out or gotten rid of#there's no third spaces#no places to hang out#my grocery bill is 2x the price now#my body hurts my brain hurts my heart hurts my teeth hurt everything fucking hurts#i cant even use Tumblr anymore because the account ive been using for the last few years wont get un shadowbanned#i dont even get the reprieve of dreams when i sleep
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ok i am actually so very angry and there's literally nothing i can do to fix it. life keeps going on. she might even be happy. and fuck dude, i'll make sure im happy too, i was a fully developed person before she was in my life and i'll continue to be one without her. but God Damn, the fact that she can just do something so blatantly awful and unfair to me and then run off without any actual repercussions is just so fucking rankling to me.
like perhaps she feels guilty. she said she did when it was all going down. but it was just something she "needed to do". so obviously she didn't feel guilty enough or she wouldnt have done it like that lmaoooo
i really did deserve to have a good solid yell at her. but unfortunately, by the time i did see her in person i just wanted her out of my fucking life. so. no yelling was done, unfortunately.
#speculation nation#the duality of being a deeply resentful and angry person. and being a person that Tries to be mature and peaceful.#like im not gonna actually Do shit even tho i keep wanting to message her just to yell at her some more again#it's like there's a beast in me that keeps yelling for retribution. she wronged me in such a disrespectful and humiliating way#and yet she just gets to walk away like it was nothing? live her life like it was nothing?#be in 'love' with her new 'soulmate' after cutting me off like a rotten limb?#i feel so DEEPLY angry. i want to spit vitriol and fire. i want to dig my claws into her bones. make her really FEEL how i feel.#i want to wander into her dreams and make her experience what i felt. every miserable second of silence.#the humiliation of admitting you might be falling in love only to be told you were never loved at all.#and i want to knee her in the gut and spit in her face and really make her regret ever fucking wronging me#but unfortunately im a stupid fucking pacifist so all the aggression and anger and violence has no FUCKING outlet#ive been. trying to not think about it too much. ive been trying to just live my life. because i dont want her to run my life.#but the anger keeps catching up to me. filtering in when i dont expect it. endless constant fucking thoughts coming back to me#on and on and on and on i live and i eat and i read and i game and i hate and i hate and i hate and i hate and i hate and i HATE AND I HATE#the greatest injustice is that i cannot make her truly feel every single ounce of my resentment and anger#it's so overwhelming i think i could choke on it. and she gets to live her FUCKING happy little life with her stupid fucking 'soulmate'#i hope it collapses around her and she loses her too so she's single and alone and miserable and regretting all of her fucking impulsivenes#she deserves to have it fail after what she did to me. and all i can really do is hope that karma has its fucking kiss for her.#if only curses were real. what i wouldnt give to put some energy into that karmic payback lmfao.#ok . ok ok ok ok love and peace on planet earth. i am shifting out of vitriolic little shit mode.#just had to let some of the steam out. im still angry but i am going to go back to not thinking about it.#i think i should go on a nice long bike ride tomorrow. to decompress and work some of the steam out.#it's something that she can never take from me. something that is so wholly mine. fuck that stupid bitch and fuck her new girlfriend too#...............................ok NOW im shifting out of vitriolic mode. lol#negative/#WAHOOOOOO i am certainly not taking this breakup well. but i dont think anyone would be lmfao.#all things considered i think im doing a pretty great job at handling this breakup.#bc at least im only recounting unrealistic threats and fantasies on my tumblr dot com instead of messaging Any of this to her.#i may kinda want her to read it so that she knows anyways. but i wont message her directly. bc i am Trying to be at least a little mature.#complaining on my tumblr dot com so i dont message my ex with more vitriol. gotta cope Somehow.
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what is my art doing on know your meme HELP ME !!!!!
#it wasnt anything i actually put a ton of effort into it was team sonic as autism creatures. but still#i dont know if i should be annoyed that they reposted my art without credit#or if i should be thankful they didnt credit me because that means a bunch of people from that website wont be coming to my blog#found it on accident because i was fucking around on google images looking at tbh images because i was trying to get a picture of him#for that last post. and then i saw it but it was with a know your meme link instead of a tumblr link and i was like ?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!?!#this is like the second time within the past couple months that ive accidentally run into#an uncredited repost of one of my silly low effort drawings that was done without permission or even just letting me know they did that#one of them was literally a screenshot of one of my text posts that had a drawing attached#and the person went out of their way to crop out my url like. hello#i guess i would rather people take those than stuff i actually worked really hard on#and its kinda funny in a ''holy shit what are you doing here'' kind of way. but im also not a big fan of people doing this
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#oh god i feel so suffocated here i think im going to die#like genuinely feel like im in a prison cell and so trapped no way out#there's no real other option other than suffer#and i feel so. not lonely. because im fine most of the day when im busy studying#but when the only break is talking to my dad. i start crying at even the littlest things#and i can't in front of him it never ends well so i have to control it and it's so difficult im a crier and i have to wait and wait#and then immediately as soon as the door is locked my knees get weak and i break down crying#i just want to talk to someone. never felt so alone before#like i want to tell my mom because he offered a way out like go back live at home in st#but mom will live here and you cook for your brother abd yourself on your own#and i wont let u go to a public gym and u have to visit every 1 month#i considered it but like. i think about her despressed as fuck in rishikesh#and me being like okay i finally made friends aftery trying and crying for one year i can't believe you're moving me again#i mean i didn't tell her but i thought it#but like yeah she says she was so depressed there because she was too away from her beloved relatives#so like how can i do this to her#and like. i mean i don't want to just live there for the sake of it i do study better under anxiety here#and food and no gym it's stupid#but like this whole option is so unfair and#he says dumb things like isn't it so nice to have a business like this we earn so much money and we're so independent#im like we?? excuse me?? you and you only#fuck i don't want to vent on tumblr about this it's not#it doesn't feel enough#it's just#the one person i could tell this to and she'd understand perfectly. and would somehow make me feel instantly better too#i can't talk to them anymore i don't know maybe my own fault but yeah#fuck at times like these i realise i haven't moved on ive just become good at not thinking about her#ill admit this now atleast. i miss her#feels weird to say her instead of you on tumblr of all places#it used to be ours
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.....i just had to block the guy again
#i feel terrible but if i let in and just keep talking to him ill get mixed up in something i cant get out of#he messaged me from another tumblr and sounded so sad.....i feel sick to my stomach tbh#i wish i could do the good person thing and be his friend but the way he texts is too much for me#like i physically feel sick i dont wanna hurt him but i cant deal with emotional stuff rn#ugh...#i dunno what to do i feel like a total bitch#he just kept saying we're friends and that hes here for me#but i cant take him on his promise that i wont get triggered#i feel like such an evil hearted bitch i wanna throw up n cry#if i could handle it i wouldve been there for him but i cant handle it#'you didnt have to block me on tumblr n discord i promised i wouldnt talk about my personal life'#i dunno some his comments reek with weaponized guilt and ive been thru too much with that kinda guy before#i honestly feel sick that i had to block him 3 times but i dunno what else to do#i hope he's okay.....he needs a friend that can handle the sadness
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ABSOLUTELY UNHINGED COMEDIC RELIEF
ASSORTED QUOTES FROM TUMBLR TEXTPOSTS, X (formerly known as twitter) POSTS, TIKTOK, MEMES, AND OTHER SOURCES AROUND THE INTERNET
CHANGE gendered words and in-universe phrases as needed.
SPECIFY muse for multimuses.
“ Currently considering becoming a bother and a nuisance, maybe even a menace or a rascal. ”
“ Hungry? Eat the government. ”
“ Yes, I wanna fuck after every argument. ”
“ Silence, you uneducated peanut! ”
“ They should invent a being alive that isn’t so difficult. ”
“ Women have to think I’m hot or none of this matters. ”
“ Due to personal reasons I will be named an enemy of the state. ”
“ Being overdressed is a myth made up by people who didn’t want you to have fun and be sexy. ”
“ What even are daddy issues? Just traumatize your father back. ”
“ I LOVE complaining! You can’t take that away from me! ”
“ I went to the silly goose convention and they all knew you. ”
“ I’m simultaneously ‘I’m tired of this grandpa’ and ‘that’s too damn bad!’ ”
“ The word ew coming out of a pretty girl’s mouth holds so much power … I think that it can tear apart nations. ”
“ Someone made fun of my shoes and the whole time I just thought of ways to push them out the window. ”
“ If you’re short, simply get taller. ”
“ I better think twice? Buddy I don’t even think once. ”
“ My off putting looks, awkward demeanor, and strange behavior have captivated you. ”
“ There’s something deeply, fundamentally wrong with you. Can we kiss? ”
“ You are a fool. When you walk, clown music plays. ”
“ I mean yeah he’s evil and all but what if I were his favorite? ”
“ I really do hate thinking. ”
“ In my defense, I simply do not vibe with the law. ”
“ I’ve done nothing wrong. Except all the atrocities. Besides that, I’m innocent. ”
“ Sorry I couldn’t hear you over my internal monologue. ”
“ Of course you have white hair and trauma. ”
“ So apparently the bad vibes I’ve been feeling are actually ‘severe psychological distress’. ”
“ Stop calling me a bad person just because I’m orchestrating your downfall! ”
“ The more lip gloss I collect the longer I live. ”
“ Sorry that I am obsessed with you in the unhealthiest way possible. As if it's my fault ”
“ The multiple failed assassination attempts against me have helped build both character and self esteem. ”
“ I could be your loser boyfriend. Do you ever think about that? ”
“ Accidentally went and got myself killed yesterday, but god wont let me die so I’m back ”
“ What do you mean napping isn't a good coping mechanism? What do you mean my problems are still here? ”
“ Academic validation is required for my sanity. ”
“ RIP to everyone killed by the gods for hubris but I’m different and better. Maybe even better than the gods. ”
“ Researching the stages of grief to see if I can get them finished in ten minutes tops. ”
“ My parents were like I’m gonna make a child that is so beyond help. ”
“ It’s not easy to admit when you’re wrong, and that’s why I won’t do it. ”
“ Why can’t this family ever have a funky good time? ”
“ How do I show people that I’m more than my unethical career choice? ”
“ I fucked my way into this mess, and I’ll fuck my way out. ”
“ You look so biteable today. ”
“ Why am I suffering? I have so many correct opinions and takes. ”
“ I AM HAUNTED BY A PAST THAT I CANNOT GO BACK TO! anyways ”
“ Challenging authority, angering gods. The family business. ”
“ Third base is me telling you about my father. ”
“ Hey girl. Plagued by terrifying visions? ”
“ Got caught giving a fuck. Embarrassing. ”
“ I didn’t ‘miss’ the red flags; I saw them and thought that they looked sexy. ”
“ Do my dark circles and deteriorating health make me look hot? ”
“ I get my news from the only reliable source, cryptic symbolism in my dreams. ”
“ Another day of being a bisexual disaster. ”
“ I’m going to let myself be a little unhinged today, as a treat. ”
“ Some of you act like murder is such a big deal. ”
“ You wanna hunt me for sport so bad that it makes you look stupid. ”
“ You’re not a girlboss unless you’ve killed someone. ”
“ It’s so weird how no one ever has correct opinions about things except for me. ”
“ Hello, my love — I mean, my rival ”
“ No one is calling me baby and it’s outrageous I can’t believe it. ”
“ No talking stage. Mutual obsession and you see god in my eyes or nothing. ”
“ I DON’T UNDERSTAND HOOKUP CULTURE DIE IN MY ARMS ”
“ Yes baby your emotional walls are high and impenetrable can we kiss now? ”
“ Affection is disgusting. Drown me in it. ”
“ I am gatekeeping my respect from you. ”
“ Well, well, well, if it isn’t the consequences of my own actions. ”
“ I am equal parts fuck around and find out and please don’t yell at me I’ll cry. ”
“ Short legs, big butt. I’m a corgi. ”
“ Fuck being the bigger person; I’m going to start biting people. ”
“ Well that wasn’t very slay of you! ”
“ May I please get a crumb of affection? ”
“ I crave power! Please don’t yell, though; I’m sensitive. ”
“ You call it a near death experience; I call it a vibe check from God. ”
“ Here are some scissors. Now cut it out. ”
“ Might commit a little tomfoolery, maybe even some shenanigans. ”
“ All these flavors, and you choose to be salty. ”
“ How can I live, laugh, love in these conditions? ”
“ What if I said ‘to be honest’ but then lied? ”
“ I'm financially at a stage where I understand why people do fraud. ”
“ Yes I may be evil and morally corrupt, but I’m also incredibly beautiful and I think that makes up for it honestly. ”
“ Debates are stupid. Why would I want to sit down and argue with someone blatantly dumber than me? ”
“ I forget but I do NOT forgive.. I'm just walking around hating bitches can't remember why ”
“ Ding dong your opinion is wrong! ”
“ I’m coming for your kneecaps. ”
“ You dropped your nose you fucking clown. ”
“ Are you a fire alarm? ‘Cause you are really fucking loud and annoying. ”
“ Call me an escalator, because I let people down. ”
“ I love me a good lesbian scandal! ”
“ If you can’t run away from your problems, you’re not running fast enough. ”
“ Everything I want to do is illegal. ”
“ Don’t make me hit your ankle with my Barbie scooter! ”
“ I tell gay jokes because I am a gay joke. ”
“ Fuck! I dropped my mental stability! ”
#askbox meme#askbox prompt#rp ask meme#ask box#roleplay sentence meme#sentence starters#roleplay prompts#roleplay sentence starters#* sentence meme
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the fake princess
pairing: reincarnated male reader x yandere prince oc
fic includes: arranged marriage, cross dressing, reader's death (briefly mentioned), Dom to sub bottom male reader, rough sex, rimming 2x, gruwhdbwb will add more in the morning
note: THIS IS NOT FINISHED!! tumblr is rlly messing me up by posting my work earlier whenever i save my draft lol. feel free to read as i write the ending. reader is male! a male!! a certain character will be calling him "lady" for the plot!! i wont spoil much but please keep that in mind ;; this is messy lmao
poor you were just on the way back to your apartment after a barbeque party with your friends— until a drunk man grabbed you from the dark alley way and stabbed you in the stomach and pussied out after he realized what he did.
is this how you die? fuck, he couldve do you a favour by taking you out in one go and not run away?? loser behaviour.
you laid down in your own blood in the dimly lit alley way, your vision slowly getting blurry as your surrounding turns into a blur of colours and into nothing.
before slipping into darkness, you heard a loud voice shouting out your name. its too late, bootlicking shitfuck.
you opened your eyes by the sound of bird chipping, you stared up at the bright blue sky accompanied by someone with dark brown hair and green eyes staring back at you.
"Lady Amador.. it's time to go back to the palace. the prince is looking foward for you during lunch time."
who the fuck is lady amador, and why are they wearing a maid outfit?
sitting up, you take note of the grass underneath you instead of the rough concrete floor from earlier- are you hallucinating to the point youre in this nice garden..? huh, why are you wearing a dress, did a creep kidnapped you and dress you in one of their grandma's dresses?!
panicking, you got up towards the pond and looked into your own reflection. you still looked the same as before, you cant say the same since your hair looked much longer and the light makeup on your face.
lady amador.. prince?? garden.. holy- is that a palace behind you?! whats going on?!
before you could brainstorm any longer, the person from earlier waved their hand in front of you, catching your attention. "lady amador, its time to go. prince sebastian is looking for you."
prince sebastian? sebastian..
slowly, everything clicked to you, did you really reincarnated as one of the characters in the novel "The Villainess's Ultimate Plan!" holy shit.
you touched your face, and then looked into the pond again, that face..
the villainess younger brother?!
the one who disguised as the protagonist.. the one that planned the entire scheme to assassinate the crown prince but end up getting beheaded one day after the wedding night?!
with that information, your vision fade into black once again.
"My lady?!"
jerking awake, you hunched over, clasping a hand against your face. you slowly takes a few deep breathe, you slowly brought your hand away.
you looked to your side, the same person from earlier is standing next to you with a worried expression. not only them, a man with bright gold hair is sitting on a chair nearby reading a book.
prince fucking sebastian. the man that you're supposed to kill during you and the prince's wedding night.
he looked up from his book and walked up to you, you flinched away when he raised his hand, he stopped his action before he promptly caressing your face.
"you, please step out of Lady Penelope's room." he ordered the person (the maid maybe?), and they complied.
there was an awkward silence in the room, he was still holding your face, you looked at the side, scared to hold any eye contact with the man in front of you.
"look at me." he said in a stern voice, like a mom scolding her child.
so you did, afraid of any consequences. (since he was the same man that's willing to destroy the kingdom for your supposed sister.)
he let go of your face before sitting onto the side of the bed, his face is blank,, as if he dont care about you, but the worried tone in his voice said otherwise.
"y/n." you jumped at the name, how did he know your name- wasnt he supposed to call you by your sister's name ?! before you can say amything, he cut you off.
"..i was waiting for you at the dining table, but i got the news of you fainting in the garden right after waking up from your nap."
"..i apologize."
he leans in towards you, settling his hands onto your face once again as if to inspect for any injuries, he lets go once again when he saw no visible injuries.
"i know you prefer to be called lady amador when it comes to appearing as your sister, but a maid was here, and i have to convince people we have a medium love with each other.
especially when our wedding night is two days from now on."
what. the story already started?! no- screw that, how did he know you were pretending to be penelope?!
"how did you know im not lady penelope?" you kissed your teeth, gripping onto the comforter, subtly slapping the prince's hand away when he tried to reach for yours.
"lady penelope had sent a letter to me, personally stating about her plan, and we agreed on one term: i keep you safe and she sends me information of the war, simple.
though, i shall say, youre quite the beauty."
you were about to curse at penelope but your ears becoming warm after he said that, he chuckled before getting up of the bed.
"most married or engaged couples have monthly night together, and ours is two night from now on. we wont do anything sensual, do not worry."
"what-"
"see you tomorrow at lunch, dear." he kissed you on the forehead before walking out of your room.
for the next two days, you learnt the person at the garden is your personal maid, Andrea. apparently she found you laying on the ground at the garden (that sebastian built for you.) after you stated you were gonna take a stroll.
you also met your personal knight, William, Penelope's second love interest but was sadly killed when he defended you during your trail.
the three of you got along well, often seen having conversation near the garden or having tea party together. sebastian watched from his office and smiled at the sight of you chatting with Andrea.
william on the other hand,, have been too close to you for his liking. he nearly ripped an important paper when he saw william wiping off some biscuit crumbs from your face- why is he so touchy? Andrea couldve done that using a napkin.
he broke his pen, the black ink soaked his hand and his paper work. did you like damian better than him? why did you become flustered when the knight spoke about something?
should he get rid of him?
how troublesome.
he remembered when a butler and notify him what happened to you. he nearly tear down the entire palace when you didnt wake up for two hours he almost frown when you flinched and move away from him when he reach out to you. the way you were nervous around him,,
he slowly calmed down, reminding himself that you and his night together is tonight. he sighed, he should finish his work first then meet you tonight.
back in your chamber, Andrea and a few other maids helped you to get ready, even helping you to take a bath. you enjoyed the smell of lavender from the soapy water, an old maid massaged your body when you're just soaking inside the bathtub.
the old lady was kind enough to even offer you a drink as she tells you stories of her youth.
after that and when Andrea deemed you 'clean', began to dress you into a white night gown made with the finest silk, the strap of the grown barely hanging on your shoulder. the maid had explained that you have to wear this because 'the prince gave the gown as a gift.'
was he not shameless when his gift includes a set of lingerie?!
you fidget around with the ring, Andrea styled your hair into a loose braid, making sure you look presentable before leading you to the prince's chamber. you insisted that you walked by yourself, so she went back to the maid headquarter.
walking down the dimly lit hallway, no one is wandering except for a few knight patrolling. you soon arrived in front of his room, knocking a few time to make your presence known "sir sebastian-"
before you could finish, sebastian opened the door and grab you by the waist, dragging you into the room.
he lifts you up and carries you to the spacious bed, he gently laid you down and take a whiff of your scent before mumbled out a "you smells nice.."
you looked at him with wide eyes, he was only wearing a robe- your eyes wonders down and sees his toned body that he had clearly worked on. he noticed you and grinned, taking your hand and putting it on his chest
"like what you see?"
if you could kill him right now you would.
instead, you pushed him down the bed, him lying down on the bed and you on top.
"what if i do?
also.. i will be the one in charge tonight."
you leaned down, opening his robe hastily and take one nipple into your lips.
sebastian nearly flipped you over, but he held himself back. he moaned when you grinned onto his crotch, he lightly tugged your hair, leaning in as if asking for a kiss.
you gave him what he wanted, he softly moaned into the kiss, slowly his hand make its way towards your shorts, pulling it down your ankle before he pulls away from the kiss.
he sat up against the bed frame and settled you on his lap, he took in the sight of you wearing his gift- that he had commissioned for it to fit you, and god.
you are so pretty.
hair messy from the kissing session, the collar of the gown was low enough for him to see the lacey bra, a garter designed with silver lining tightly wrapped around your thigh and the underwear that only covered your erected cock-
he want to eat you up,,
so he did.
Sebastian was known to be a beast in bed as he was known in the battlefield,, was what the novel described him.
Unfortunately they were true to their words, his thrust was harsh and deep, creating impacts thats enough to make you cry out.
so much of being gentle?! he even ripped off your outfit, leaving you naked!
he was nice enough to eat you out earlier, even giving you to opportunity to ride his face.
sebastian continue with this harsh pace, holding one of your leg onto his shoulder while another holds your hand. his apologized multiple times while grunting, saying things likes
"im sorry- ah! youre so tight!"
"mm- if you keep moaning like that- hng! i wont be able to slow down-"
"dear.. mmh.. im sorry.. i'll take care of you later-!" im gonna kill you, you handsome bastard!!
you clung onto him on each thrust, it just feel so-! sebastian suddenly changed the position, pushing you on your knees while holding your arms at the back,
"se-sebasti- ah! wait-! mngh!" he holds your hand behind you back tightly to ground you, the position didnt help at all, you couldnt muffle your moans and his dick reach deeper than it did in the previous position.
he panted, letting go of your arms fearing that your arm is sore. he gave an apologetic kiss on your forehead before continuing .
he grunted when you tighten around him, he tried to sooth you by giving stroking your cock, but that only add to the pleasure as you cried out of overstimulation.
you felt like you were melting.
you had climax into sebastian's hand, fuck- why isnt he stopping-?! you continued to cry out before he stuff his finger with your cum into your mouth, you immediately bit onto his fingers to muffle your moans.
his climax came sooner than you expected, he twitched and came inside. he slowed down his thrust, riding out his climax before pulling out.
you panted, thinking its over,, until sebastian gripped your aas and spread them apart revealing your winking hole, dripping out his children batter.
without hesitation, he dive in as if its his last meal, slurping and eating his own cum. you moaned at this, trying to push him away but he stayed still.
"what are you-"
"round 2? gotta have heirs for the future y'know.." he said with a toothy grin, flipping you over your back and pressing you thigh until your ankle reach your chest.
"ah?!"
the knights guarding outside sebastian's chamber looked at each other then looked down, the two of them had an erection from your moaning- tone it down sometimes!
a/n: not proud with this one, will check and edit it in the morning (its 3.56 am right now) goodnight ^_^
#mayi'swriting—#oc x male reader#male reader#bottom male reader#bttm male reader#sub male reader#yandere x reader#yandere oc x reader
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BOYFRIEND MATT, headcannons!
boyfriend matt would, give you piggy back rides from the car to the front door when coming home from getting your toe nails painted and trimmed.
boyfriend matt would, be afraid to get comfortable in bed, not wanting to take up too much space and make you uncomfortable.
boyfriend matt would, press kisses on the tip of your nose when you cry, as an attempt to cheer you up.
boyfriend matt would, compare hand sizes, acting intrigued just so you’d put your hand on his, too afraid to ask for physical intimacy at times.
boyfriend matt would, always offer you his hoodies, loving the way you look in them.
boyfriend matt would, stock up on santitary/ period products for whenever you come to stay, leaving them in your drawer in his bathroom.
boyfriend matt who, hugs you at anytime of the day, either your cooking pasta for dinner and he envelopes you in a hug from behind.
boyfriend matt who, would purposely spill crumbles off his plate onto the bed to get a reaction from you while your mad, wanting to hear your voice.
boyfriend matt who, loves pampering you, whether it’s helping you in the shower, colouring in with you, buying you all the gifts you want, doing everything for you while your in a shit mood.
boyfriend matt who, refuses to leave you alone when you cry. “nuh uh, were gonna hug it out, okay? m’ not leaving my precious baby alone while she cries.”
boyfriend matt who, helps you out of your comfort zone, taking you to social gatherings, trying new foods with you.
boyfriend matt who, encourages you to join in on group activities, knowing your an introvert. “cmon babes, just kick the ball f’ me, ‘kay?”
boyfriend matt who, takes you away from a crowded area when noticing you keep pulling at your dress, biting your nails.
boyfriend matt who, without asking takes your hand and takes you to the bathroom with him. “cmon, just wait here ‘f me. i’ll pee quick i promise.”
boyfriend matt who, let’s you play your songs in the car, even when he doesn’t enjoy them as much as you “is this gigi perez or gracie abrams?”
thing’s matt sturniolo would say!
“i dont know how to do this. am i doing it right? the words of affirmation thing?”
“wow, babes.. you look stunning.”
“please.. please just listen to me.”
“no more drinks, ‘kay? i dont want you doing things you’d regret.”
“you look like you need a hug.”
“how can you still manage to look so beautiful while crying? i look like a wet dog when i do.”
“just talk to me, i promise it’ll help.”
“we’ll get through this.. problem, okay? it was just a small relapse. you tried baby, and im so proud.”
“im not letting you sleep on the couch, come on. get under the blankets.”
“i mean.. im cool with sharing a bed if you are.”
“i bought you some flowers, ‘knew how much you needed them.”
“where’s my goodnight kiss?”
“you can stay as long as you wont, my mom loves you.”
“next time, just give me a heads up, ‘kay?”
“im just glad your okay, baby.”
“i couldn’t- i couldnt find you and i just thought something happened, alright?”
“just, sit down! please. god.”
“no, dont cry. i hate it when you cry”
“hey, no more of that. stop it, you’ll hurt yourself.”
“i could use a hug.”
writers note: whoever sees this and want’s tumblr friends pls comment cause i’d love to talk to yalll💝 also it would really be appreciated if i get sent some requests !!
hashtags ꨄ
#mattsturniolo#blurb#headcannons#sturniolo triplets#fluff#tumblr fyp#matt sturniolo#sturniolo series
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i know its a classic. possibly cliche already. but i do wonder about Tumblr In The Death Note Universe probably more than i should
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💅 toxicbff Follow
if i see one more post attributing kira's powers to ~supernatural powers~ instead of the obvious fact that the cia is doing a coup I'm going to start giving You the heart attacks
💅 toxicbff
of course i saw the news how does that not prove my point further
the idea that all the police around the world could be mobilized by one single person is ridiculous (just look at this list of how many civilian militia there are globally)
heart attack victims don't seize the way "lind l tailor" did
i don't know how to tell you that You Can't Kill People Just By Knowing Their Name And Face because this is Real Life and not the newest grimdark marvel villain
people need to stop being scared of the ~bogeyman in the closet~ and wake up to the fact that usamerica is trying to take over the goddamned world
💅 toxicbff
im going to kill you all and nuke this website
#sayonara you weeaboo shits
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👾 lets-go-geeks Follow
DO TRUMP NEXT
🕵🏾���♀️ penny-penelope Follow
LIKES TO CHARGE REBLOGS TO CAST
16,375 notes
❤️🔥 lovesickened Follow
i know its stupid but im so fucking scared for my brother i heard that seven people died this week at the prison he's in and iinjust dont kenow what to do ihate him for ehat he did to mom but i never wanted him to die
#vent tw #delete later
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🏎 fastandyurious Follow
if i get a single more comment about why i don't tag "genderbend" on my kiratective fics i'm going to blow up the entire building. we don't know EITHER of their genders. why don't YOU tag your mediocre yaoi genderbend instead
🔆 sparkling-world Follow
…OP, you realize the news reports all consistently use "he," right?
🏎 fastandyurious
of course i do???? just because you see something on the news doesn't mean you have to believe it?????? they don't have any information on kira yet but i'm supposed to believe the fbi knows their gender already??????? also kira is literally a fucking girl's name my classmate in elementary school was called kira
🔆 sparkling-world
Kira comes from the Japanese romanization for "killer," it isn't gendered whatsoever.
Also, evidence shows the majority of serial killers are male, so I'd argue that the statistics favor the fujoshis here.
🏎 fastandyurious
well evidence shows that female serial killers are just more fun to write about and I'd argue that you're ignoring my fucking POINT which is that we DON'T KNOW KIRA'S GENDER and if people don't want to read lesbian kiratective they can FUCK OFF MY BLOG
🥚 i-offer-eggman Follow
I offer you an Eggman in these trying times.
🔮 I-stands-for-le-gay Follow
@lashitpostcalligrapher yo can i get "the statistics favor the fujoshis" on my tombstone
#fandom: kira rpf #ship: kiral #never heard it called kiratective before… #also uh. prayer circle for op's classmate lmaoooo
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💃🏻 modelingmadness Follow
BOYCOTT EIGHTEEN MAGAZINE
THEY ALLOW KIRA-SUPPORTING MODELS AND ARE COMPLICIT IN THIS MASSACRE
SOURCES HERE AND HERE (TRIGGER WARNING: KIRA DISCUSSION)
PUSH BACK AGAINST HEART ATTACKS
🧚🏽♂️ harubaru Follow
golly gee ^_^ suddenly i feel like taking to the high seas in a way that the eighteen company cant get profit from. oh no ! who left this link here
🐦⬛ kuro--misa Follow
thanks for the link but jesus fucking christ man what happened to free speech. misa-misa's parents were killed by a burglar who kira punished. did you all expect her to just sit there, look pretty, and say nothing about it?
you people only like models when they're nice pictures for you to consume. you only like them two-dimensional and smiling and hot. the second a woman actually speaks her mind she's thrown to the wolves
💃🏻 modelingmadness
DID YOU NOT SEE MY BANNER YOU PIECE OF SHIT
#BLOCKED
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🐦⬛ kuro--misa Follow
lol. lmao even
#they blocked me but whatever #official eighteen site just said misamisa wont be in the next issue #(eighteen sucks but i kind of want to use it more out of spite now) #so much for apologism huh? #god. i feel sick. #hasn't she been through enough.
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🥷🏻 kira-imagines Follow
Imagine you're going home after a long day. Suddenly there's a sound. "Huh? Whose there" you ask, dropping your keys on the floor. Then you feel it. A knife pressing in your neck.
"Don't move kitten" Kira purrs behind you. "You're all mine now…"
#kiraxreader #kiraxoc #kira #kira rpf #kira investigation #kira fucker #kira fudger #kira lover #kira haters dont touch #kira haters please touch #kira supporters please touch #l
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asahi-the-student-deactivated201
Hello, everyone! My little sister told me about this microblogging platform (I admit, I'm a Twitter refugee) and that many of you are discussing the Kira investigation on here. I'm really interested in hearing what your thoughts are!
💋 sunny-sayu Follow
let the record show he lasted like. a day
#i think it was the imagines that did him in #bro is so sensitive :p
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kiyomitakada
the world could be beautiful
[ @deathnotetober day 14: trigger ]
#death note#light yagami#sayu yagami#misa amane#lawlight#by uh. technicality.#does 'trigger warning' fit the prompt i hope it does…#also there are two (2) rickrolls in this post#the other links are all to actual fun stuff :3#good luck#deathnotetober#edit: fixed the FUCKIGN reblog dividers GOD DAMN IT#unreality#caps#edit 2: fixed the reblog dividers again theyre transparent now#…………wow i really just. spent four hours on this huh.#maybe i am experiencing slight mania#only slight#death note tumblr
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ive talked about it before but i wanna talk about it again and that's
body types in drawing especially in terms of one piece characters
and i know its because official art presents them all the same but it just does not feel right to me, y'know? especially when i look at fanart and it looks like they just drew the same body multiple times with different faces (talent in that yes but god change it up a bit PLEASE)
like with my style i like to draw semi-realistic cartoon type beat, and that means im thinking about an abstract of shape language in the way that i present the characters. i consider their fighting styles and workouts when i think about what their body type would be, not just for op ive done this with mha and jjk characters too because god dammit gege, maki deserves bulkier muscles for her efforts
so here it is. my analysis of more semi-realistic designs for these characters. all my opinion and not meant to be a call out to anyone.
also, not including the women because we all know how unrealistic they look and i dont need to explain that to you im begging just use reference.
LUFFY
rubberhose arms are ESSENTIAL in his design so when i draw him, i never put too much definition in his muscles. real definition should be reserved for gears that alter his muscles
noodly arms and stick ass legs that is his Charm thank you i dont need super definition
ZORO
on the opposite end of the spectrum, zoro.
though, i see many people draw him more bodybuilder silhouette when he should be powerlifter silhouette, youve SEEN how this man works out. stereotypical bodybuilder physique that's all muscle and no fat is EXTREMELY UNHEALTHY TO MAINTAIN and you know theres no damn way sanjis letting someone on the ship watch their weight for the sake of visuals. he should be defined and bulky, but softer edges on the abs.
USOPP
Speaking first on pre ts, what does he excel at most? long range weapons and running.
obviously he gets proper strength training during timeskip, but i really think the best representative for him is olympic sprinters
muscular, but still pretty skinny
SANJI
hear me out. ballet physique.
i see him drawn w the same physique as Zoro and it just feels so wrong. he doesnt train his upper body, so most of his definition would be in his core and legs. not to mention his flexibility tracks with that.
maybe ill come back with a figure study on these later to fully show how it translates into my drawings but. for now. tumblr wont let me add any more images to this post
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hello hello I hope you're having a wonderful day/night! Request for TADC!!
Okay so jax x bunny y/n? what if y/n was like lola bunny?? I really don't know how to describe her personally so I would base it of like the one from space jam 1? Like the first movie?? (IF yk what I mean😭) And I imaged if y/n was called doll/toots/ect by jax or anyone (like how bugs bunny did to lola in that one sence) she would get the most heaviest thing near them and throw it at jax or like punch him or something!! 😭😭
THATS ALL I COULD IMAGE BUT HAVE FUN WITH THIS IDEA!!😌
Jax x Bunny!reader
Imma admit I'm mostly going off what I heard ab Lola's original personality as well as this ask; typically I would do a quick look over in a fandom wiki (not always reliable, I know) but my eyes feel like they're full of soup (it's getting late 😭😭)
Writing this on mobile! So typos and mistakes are likely to be more.. dudjdkf??
This one is more platonic/neutral since I wasnt entirely sure how to make this romantic! Sorry if that's what you wanted ^^;
This was originally gonna be longer but I'm eepy and tumblr (on mobile) wont let me save half answered asks in my drafts 😭😭
Honestly he LOOOOOVES teasing you and calling you those endearing names, even before you two foster a relationship, if at all (romantic or otherwise)
He thinks your reaction is funny and more often than not he can dodge whatever it is you toss his way (I mean, did you SEE how fast he ran in the pilot?)
Doesnt feel much in regards to you also being a bunny, since he knows it's not your guys' actual.. real bodies, so why would he feel anything about it...?
Actually... he might use that as ammo for teasing you...
"We're like a match made in heaven!" *side steps a flying book shelf*
He uses the names you mentioned in the request but I feel like he would also get very creative/sickeningly sweet with them to further annoy you
"Schnookums" "my pookie wookie bear" "my sweetheart with whipped cream and sztra sprinkles on top", progressively gets more obnoxious
Stuff like that !!
I just imagine you running after him, throwing things at him while he just has this smug look on his face
#tadc x you#the amazing digital circus x reader#digital circus x reader#jax x reader#jax x you#jax imagine
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so what happens patrick is back from tour and visiting and you're all at his big mansion for a weekend and you're making art absolutely fucking miserable because you keep treading a thin line - flashing your panties to art from behind patrick so he cant see - clinging to arts arm and when patrick asks when you got so close all the sudden you giggle and arts heart nearly drops out of his ass but you just say its because hes been so helpful on campus! he even told off a bully for you! - art could strangle you, you think this is a game like patrick wont literally break his teeth if he finds out and why is that so fucking funny to you?
he ends up cornering you in a moment alone - when you're coming out of the shower and patricks doing something else - he slips into the bathroom - locks it. backs you up against the sink counter when you're in just a towel and you're so excited but art looks furious - and not the horny kind of mad he gets before he caves and touches you - the genuine anger before he cuts deep and you think 'oh shit -' before he lays into you.
Because, what the fuck? Do you think your pussy is more important than his friendship with patrick? Is that it? Are you thinking that if patrick finds out arts gonna pick up his sword and fight for you? Dump patrick for you? Finally date you? Is that the delusional little fantasy you've been cooking in your head?
You aren't the kind of girl he wants to date anyway, he says most painfully. I mean, you let him fuck your ass and slap you around - and throw your pussy at him at every given opportunity. You're not the kind of girl he'd have as a girlfriend. You're the kind of girl guys fuck before they find a woman with some fucking self respect.
It might be the meanest thing he's ever said. Which is why you're both suprised by the slap that rings out - your hand frozen in the air in shock - arts head whipped to the side from the hit, cheek already burning red from your handprint.
You want to say sorry - but art just laughs. Shoves you to your knees - "I'll show you fucking sorry - " and when he fucks your throat you know your tears are from the truth of his words as much as how hard hes hitting the back of your throat.
🥰🌈☀️💐 how life feels when tumblr user poppy-metal in my inbox
It’s two days, but he feels like he’s going insane just one day in. Every single fleeting glance you send his way, he’s sure is going to be the one thing that makes him slip up— that clues Patrick in on every fucked up thing he’s done.
But he gets set off on Saturday night, when the three of you are smoking outside in the garden. It annoys him because it was like he can’t get a fucking second alone with Pat. Like you need to be there to remind him of what a shitty friend he is. Patrick closes his eyes, leans back on a stone bench.
You’re sitting on the fountain with a cigarette dangling from manicured fingers. He sees something dangerous flash in your expression and it makes him sit up straight. You uncross your legs and reveal your bare pussy beneath the little skirt you wear, Art he takes a long drag, but can’t make himself look away like he should.
A strange, mournful tug pulls at his chest when you close your legs, hide away from him again. Your laugh rings through the air when you look at Art, when you feel the palpable want. Patrick sits up, eyes narrowed. “What’s so funny, huh?” Art coughs uncomfortably on his exhale.
You glance over at the blond, duck your head shyly. It’s all a fucking act, Art thinks. He can see you laying out every single clue for Patrick to uncover. It’s fun for you, to make Art squirm, like you have the power. And you do. You could fucking ruin him.
But you just shrug, blow smoke towards Patrick’s face, which makes your brother’s expression wrinkle in annoyance. He ashes his cigarette with a tap of his finger. “You two are pretty close now,” he notes. Not accusatory. Yet. “Do you two have fun at Stanford without me?”
Art opens his mouth to speak, to deny that he spends time with you outside of making sure you don’t get roofied at college parties. But you speak first, your voice ringing out into the air. “Art’s been really good to me at school,” you say, really laying it on thick. “He’s always taking care of me and making sure I’m happy. I can sleep in his room when I’m lonely, and he doesn’t let any guys take advantage of me when we’re at parties. He always keeps me close so nothing bad happens. He actually broke up with his girlfriend because she was being so mean to me.”
Patrick’s jaw ticks slightly, and the brunet forces himself to laugh. Art’s stomach drops, and he takes a drag to distract himself. You fucking bitch. You know exactly what you’re doing, he can read it in the fake, doe-eyed look you wore.
“That’s nice, Donaldson,” Patrick says. “Keeping my little sister happy, huh? Really nice.”
You stand up, like that was your cue to leave. So Patrick could beat Art into a pulp, drown him in the fountain, put out his cigarette on his tongue. It was hard to say. But you just stretched, stubbed out your cigarette on the stone edge of the fountain. “I’m gonna go shower before Daddy smells smoke on me,” you tell Patrick. You ruffle his hair, then turn to face Art. “Goodnight.”
Art is quiet, watches you disappear into the hedges and greenery leading back to the house. The door shuts behind you in the distance like a gunshot, and Patrick glares over at him. “What the fuck, dude?”
Art sighs, runs a hand through his hair. “She’s exaggerating,” he says as calmly as he’s able. He meets Patrick’s gaze, does his best not to wilt. “She’s just trying to convince you that she’s doing fine at school.”
Patrick’s tongue pokes against his jaw, his eyes narrowed slightly. “Whatever,” he says, shaking his head. “I fucking hate this, you know. We’re hardly even talking, but somehow my little sister knows all about your fucking college girlfriend. I didn’t even know you had one, dude.”
Art swallows, nods. “I know, I’ve just been…” He sighs. “Senior year, you know? Things will be different once I graduate and go pro like you.”
Patrick rolls his eyes, shrugs. “Yeah, sure. Whatever, dude. Night.”
Art is left alone in the garden, with the stub of a cigarette burned down to his fingers. He sticks it in a flower pot and bites at his cuticles. They’re practically raw at this point, but he’d already chewed the inside of his lip raw and achy, so he’s running low on things he can use to distract himself.
Once he sees the light in Patrick’s room flick on he stands and walks back to the house. Patrick’s parents were always weird about him wandering the place alone— like he’d steal some random clock that was a gift from a world leader, or something stupid like that. Like his parents weren’t making six figures themselves.
Whatever. You and Patrick are both fucking brats, spoiled and expecting the world to fall at your feet. Expecting him to fall at your feet. Fuck that. Fuck you for screwing up his friendship with Patrick, for making it impossible to talk to his best friend because of the guilt.
Your bathroom door is open to the hallway to let the steam curl out while you get ready for bed. When he walks past, you ignore him entirely, and it snaps something sharp and hard in his chest. He slips in, shuts the door, pins you against the counter.
You’re wearing a robe— leopard print and tacky. It falls open just slightly, and he’s greeted by a glimpse of your tits. You smile up at him, pretty and amused, expecting him to cave, to touch you the way you’ve been needing. But you know Art— you’ve seen most of his expressions at this point. Good, like when he and Patrick won the doubles tournament and you saw joy written in his face. Bad, when you got too handsy at a party and he dragged you away and laid into you.
But he was more than that, he looks scary. Your smile falls and you press yourself back against the counter so it digs into your spine. His eyes follow the line of your throat as you swallow hard, like he can read your dread in every tiny movement. He grabs your wrist, hard enough to make you yelp.
“Art, that hurts,” you whine, trying to wrestle out of his grip.
“Cry to Patrick then,” he says, and you wither. “That’s right. You don’t want Patrick to find out what a disgusting fucking whore you are, do you?” You give a weak shake of your head. “Then shut the fuck up and listen.”
Your pulse is already hammering, he can feel it thrumming where he holds your wrist. You’re all limp and pliant, waiting for the blow to strike.
“You are actually fucking crazy if you think I would ever choose you over Patrick,” he says, and you exhale sharp out of your nose. “And whatever you think is going to happen here is just one of your brainless little fantasies. If Patrick finds out what you’ve been doing, he’s going to fucking kill me. It’s going to be messy, and fucked up, and he’s going to lose his only friend in the entire fucking world. It’s going to crush him. And when that happens, it’s going to be all your fault. And for what?”
You swallow, blinking at him dumbly, unsure of what to say. Were you supposed to talk back? Were you supposed to just stand there and take it?
“I’m never going to fucking date you. You let me fuck your ass, and you suck my dick and let me slap you around, and I bet if I touched you right now you’d be soaked, but it doesn’t change anything. Because guys like me don’t call girls like you their girlfriends or wives. Girls like you are a stopping point on the way to someone better, someone who has some fucking self respect.”
The sound of the slap startles you, even if you were the one to hit him. Your hand stings where it collided with his face, where it left a red mark behind.
“Art—“ you start, eyes wide as you look at him. Your voice is watery, teary and pathetic. “I’m so— I shouldn’t have— I’m sorry, Art. Fuck, I’m sorry, I’m so sor—“
You whimper as he pushes you hard onto your knees, makes them dig into marble tile. He’s already hard when he pulls down his jeans and boxers, and you feel hot tears slipping down your cheeks.
You’d fucking hit him. You ruined everything, you were always going to ruin everything. You’d fucked him up, you made him twisted and mean and nasty. All your fault. You needed to fix it.
“You’re sorry? Fucking show me then.” He slaps his cock against your cheek, precum smears against the plush skin there. It snaps you back into reality. He rubs his tip against your lips, moves his hand into your hair.
Your heart hurts, actually hurts in a way you’ve never felt before. You wonder if you should go to the hospital, or something, but every cell in your body just says. Show him you’re sorry. Show him you’re sorry. Apologize apologize apologize.
You open your mouth, relax your throat, let him bully his cock inside. He doesn’t give you time to adjust, you try not to need it. Even when he’s slamming into the back of your throat again and again, when you’re gagging and feel drool flooding your mouth and it’s all messy, dripping down your chin.
“That’s it, take this fucking dick—“ His grip on your hair tightens and your cries are muffled around his cock. Your jaw aches from being stretched wide to accommodate him. Your face is smeared with black mascara tears, snot, and sticky spit. You look awful, you feel awful. But Art doesn’t care. He’s getting off on it. “Fucking choke on it. ‘S all you’re good for, isn’t it?”
He pulls you off, slaps you across the cheek. “Isn’t it?”
You sniffle pathetically, nod, and open your mouth wide. Show him you’re sorry. Show him you’re sorry. You let him slide back into your throat until your nose presses firm against the soft curls at his pelvis, until his balls press against your chin and they’re coated in the stringy, slick drool that spills from your lips.
Art grabs your face, holds your nose shut and blocks off your airways. Your throat constricts in panic and you look up at him with wild, frightened eyes. Nails scratching at his thighs as you feel the need for air begin to get to intense.
You can’t breathe. Arts fucking into your throat, and you’re going to puke, and you can’t breathe, and he’s going to just let you black out around him. The tears are flowing hot and fast, you keep pathetically grasping at his thighs. He lets go of your nose, but doesn’t let you pull off of him. He ruts against the back of your throat, and you’re only faintly conscious of something warm and hot shooting down your throat as your body screams for a big gasp of air.
It’s only then that he lets you pull off, with cum dripping from your lips, from your nose. You take large heaving breaths and cry as you try to wipe it all away. It only manages to smear it around your skin.
You feel stupid, but you can’t stop crying. Not because it hurt, not because you were scared and couldn’t breathe. But because what he said fucking stung.
You’re nothing more than a hole for him to use. Worse, you’re nothing to him at all. A stopping point until he gets someone better. He sees you like that, and he treats you like that.
“Stand up,” he says. His cock has hardly even flagged, and you watch him wrap a hand around himself, stroke himself standing above you. “C’mon, I’ll fuck you— I’ll give you what you want. If Patrick’s gonna find out I might as well make it worth it, right?”
You stand and grip the edge of the sink. Your head swims as you look at him. His hand moves between your thighs, probing at your entrance. The first breach of his finger makes you whimper. You’re not wet, not nearly enough.
“Art, stop,” you say, voice wobbly. “I don’t want it.”
“No? You fucking wanted it all semester.” He mouths at your throat, wet and hot, and you shake your head. “Did I hurt your feelings, baby? You need me to lie to you? Does that get you wet?”
Tears well in your eyes again, and you shove at his arm until he pulls his finger out. “Just leave me alone, Art. I won’t bother you anymore. I get it.”
He looks like he wants to say something, but he doesn’t. He fixes his clothes and slips back into the hallway.
You cry so hard that you throw up. Brush your teeth so hard that they bleed and you spit pink foam into the sink basin. Wash the mess off of your face until it’s stinging and raw.
The rest of the weekend, you rot around in bed. Keep your doors locked, pretend that you have food poisoning. You relish in the solitude and watch Lost on DVD. You make it halfway through the first season before there’s a knock on your door.
“Hey, I have soup,” Patrick calls, muffled through the door. “Doctor’s orders.”
You stand up, pad slowly to the door and let him in. Sure enough, he’s got a little tray for you. Ginger ale, Gatorade, and soup. You want to cry that he cares so much— that he’s such a good brother. He sits the on the foot of your bed and sits against the headboard.
“I’m sick, Pat,” you say once you sit back down, a feeble attempt to be alone.
All he does is shrug, press play on the DVD. “Whatever, it’s food poisoning, right? Not contagious. Lemme watch with you.”
You eat some of the soup, but your appetite isn’t there. You just sit it on the floor and curl up next to Patrick. He wraps his arms around you, lets you lean on his shoulder.
It’s only an episode later that he talks. “Did he do something?”
You freeze a bit, then redirect, gesturing to the screen. “John Locke?”
Patrick sighs, jaw ticking. “You know who I’m talking about. You can tell me.”
“What are you talking about?” You ask, feigning confusion. He gives you a look, exhales sharply. “Art? Did he give me food poisoning?”
You feel stupid protecting him still. After everything. You know where you stand with Art, and it makes you sick. There aren’t any more dreams of somehow convincing him to love you through your cunt, like your pussy is some sort of magic love potion. It feels more like poison. It ruined everything— you and your incessant greed.
But you don’t want to hurt Patrick. Art could hurt you, but he can still be good to Pat. That’s worth something.
“Not the food poisoning, just… anything. Did he do anything to you?”
You meet his gaze, and lie the way you grew up lying to everyone. “Patrick, he didn’t do anything. I don’t even know what you think he would do.“
Patrick nods, but doesn’t say anything else. He stays two more episodes, then leaves.
Art never stops by your room, which is good. You don’t want to see him, because even thinking about it makes you feel sick. You lock your door again and don’t sleep. Art leaves early in the morning to go to the airport, back to Stanford.
You transfer your plane ticket for the next weekend, text classmates to get you notes. You’d be staying home for a while.
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let's talk about project 2025 and smut.
bc I've seen some of my favorite authors already state they aren't writing any more smut due to the mere threat of project 2025 going into effect. And hey, I'm a simple person who likes to read abt sexy times.
pls read through all the way and share if ya like any of what i wrote here - i don't want panic to be spreading through the writers of tumblr/ao3 like wildfire unchecked.
qualifications: BA in political science focusing on domestic policy, activism and ethnic studies.
Part I - what is it?
project 2025 at its core is a roadmap. it was created by the Heritage Foundation (an extremely far right disgusting think tank), and plenty of people associated with the previous and incoming Trump presidency. its like 900 pages of alt-right, christian nationalist bullshit.
but its not uncommon.
think tanks like the Heritage Foundation often create roadmaps like this to plot out what they would most want to see in a future presidency or period of political control. it isn't even particular to right-wing think tanks; left wing ones do it too! the difference in this case is the magnitude and attention paid to the manifesto.
the heritage foundation is a vast organization with a lot of money, and has had a part in US politics for a long ass time now. because of this, what they say/do carries a bit more weight. combined with the fact that dems in the past election used project 2025 as a common refrain (instead of like, developing their own policy but whatevs), you get a general public who is aware of the buzzword "project 2025" but not knowledgeable about what it contains.
what it does actually include is certainly worrying, but among the new freaky shit is a ton of stuff that has been on the republican party's to do list since day one, like dismantling the department of education. just reading that seems really shocking, i know, but if you look back to when the department was created, you will find evidence of republicans trying desperately to dismantle it.
i find the media flurry around project 2025 to be a bit concerning, because while i understand dems wanting to show voters how dangerous this shit can be, its also made it into something far more important than it could actually be. as i stated earlier, these types of policy blueprints are extremely common among think tanks. its like their entire job!! and yes, this one is scarier and more visible than others, but it
a.) isn't the official policy of the incoming admin (and if you look at their actual policy statement, its very clear they don't rly have policies, so who knows what that's gonna look like)
b.) isn't united states federal law
Part II - what's it gonna look like?
i'm not gonna sit here and say you shouldn't be worried about project 2025, bc a lot of whats in it is freaky asf. but that freakiness is what (in my opinion) will be its primary challenge. since its so out there, the extreme right wing republicans are going to have to work their asses off to get the votes they need to pass these things.
which brings me to another point-- project 2025 is a whole list of proposals. its not like republicans can put forth one bill that has the entirety of project 2025 in it and pass it all at once. for a whole laundry list of reasons, that's not possible. the process of getting one bill passed through the house and senate is an excruciatingly long one, and doing this process for 900 pages worth of plans ain't gonna be easy.
i should mention that donald trump has yet to endorse the plan as his own, so there's the real possibility that he wont even want to implement any of the ideas included. i could 100% see him ignoring the entire plan because he doesn't like that someone else came up with it tbh. and while i don't believe he has never heard of the heritage foundation, as he has claimed in the past, i think it is important to note that there hasn't been any confirmation from him that project 2025 is his roadmap.
the plan includes rollbacks of rights for every minority group possible, restrictions on immigration, access to morning-after pills, restructuring of the federal government to allow for easier hiring and firing based on little/no evidence, etc. all in all, not great.
but again, project 2025 isn't united states federal law
Part III - what does it mean for fanfic authors?
the section that has the fanfic-consuming/creating world in a tizzy is the bit about outlawing pornography. this is a concerning policy propsal, but not because of possible fanfic bans. rather, bc project 2025 and the heritage foundation at large sees queerness as inherently and exclusively sexual.
"pornography, manifested today in the omnipresent propagation of transgender ideology and sexualization of children" (The Heritage Foundation, p.5)
thus, if they ban pornography (with a definition that includes/focuses on queerness), they can effectively ban expressions of queerness in the united states.
that shit is scary. and while i never want to rely on foundational documents when the people interpreting those documents (court justices (esp those appointed by the previous and incoming trump admin)), i will hesitantly say that this is gonna be a tough sell. both from a constitutional standpoint, and from a broad base support standpoint.
for the first of the two points, arguing that the first amendment doesn't "apply" to something is always a slippery slope, and defending that point is extraordinarily difficult. obviously this isnt always the case, but especially relating to pornography and obscenity, proving that a work fails the Miller test (a three part test created in Miller v. California (1973) to determine if something is obscene or not) is, like, really hard (heh).*
while the miller test is precedent for specific cases that come up in the court system, if some version of the porn ban goes into effect, the US court system is going to be dealing with challenges from every state, every form of media, every fandom.
which brings me to the second point. broad base support.
while the headline about Grindr crashing in Milwaukee during the RNC wasn't true in 2024, republican events in previous have brought an influx in users to the area in which the events are held if ya know what i'm sayin👀
on a real note though, getting a pornography ban passed in the united states would be exceedingly hard (no pun intended). especially one that includes forms of media like written pornography, not just visual. in terms of feasibility, a ban on video pornography is incrementally more likely than one on all forms of pornography. arguments against porn are weak at best, and the anti-porn movement in the US (usually religious) has been trying, and failing, for decades to ban pornography. most content about porn bans also refers primarily to video-based porn, not written smut.
let's just say worst case scenario something like this does go into action. anything you've written before the law goes into action cannot be used as a way to prosecute you. that would be an example of ex post facto punishment, which is explicitly prohibited in the constitution and by court precedent.
*note: i'm not endorsing the way the US court precedents around porn/obscenity look, as they are another symptom of purity culture and anti-sex culture created in the US
Part IV - what do we do?
well, giving up before a bill has even been proposed ain't it. it makes me deeply sad to see so many writers saying they wont be writing smut anymore because of the vague possibility of this plan. not only does it make me sad, it makes me angry. because that means people have seen so much misinformation about what project 2025 is and how it works that they are too scared to do anything about it. let me repeat again.
project 2025 is not law in the united states of america, nor is it in the process of becoming so. act accordingly.
so go forth, write smut, be gay, do some shit to make the heritage foundation angry today. and don't give up before the battle has even started. bc that's how they win. and i know shit seems really scary, but community and mutual aid is how we are gonna make it through this, so do your due diligence and research what you're scared about! knowledge is power and you gotta wield that sh*t.
i'd like to end with a quote from Timothy Snyder, who everyone and their mother has been quoting recently, but i still think it has value.
"Do not obey in advance. Most of the power of authoritarianism is freely given. In times like these, individuals think ahead about what a more repressive government will want, and then offer themselves without being asked. A citizen who adapts in this way is teaching power what it can do. Anticipatory obedience is a political tragedy." (Excerpted from On Tyranny by Timothy Snyder, 2017)
[Note - i have cited sources where appropriate, but this is also based on my (important to note, informed) opinion. please treat it as such, thank you]
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