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#i wonder if it was the dragon who told gaius to
arthurslesbian · 2 years
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NO MORGANA YOU WERE RIGHT 😭😭😭
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larluce · 7 days
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Arthur and Merlin travel back in time without knowing the other is from the future too AU
I'll be putting the tag list at the end now ❤️
LINKS TO THE OTHER PARTS OF THIS AU HERE: PART 1 , PART 2 , PART 3 , PART 4 , PART 5 , PART 6 , PART 7 , PART 8 , PART 9 , PART 10 , PART 11 , PART 12 , PART 13 , PART 14 , PART 15 , PART 16 , PART 17 , PART 18 , PART 19 , PART 20 , PART 21 , PART 22 , PART 23 , PART 24 , PART 25 , PART 26
Merlin: (thinking, reciting Gaius words) Deny, be submissive, be respectful. Deny, be submissive, be respectful (enters the throne room and bows) Did you call for me, Sire?
Uther: (siting on his throne, pulls out the neckerchief and asks very serious) Do you recognise this.
Merlin: (thinking) Straight to the point then... (pretends to analyse the item and then says) No, I don't believe so, Sire.
Uther: Are you sure?
Merlin: Pretty sure. I've never seen it in my life.
Uther: (puts the clothing back in his pocket) This clothing is part of a serious investigation, so I wanted to make sure.
Merlin: A investigation, Sire?
Uther: Early in the morning this clothing was found deep in the woods with dry blood stains. There were some blood stains on the ground nearby too.
Merlin: Oh... Well, good luck with your investigation then, Sire. 😅 (smiles nervous, thinking) Deny, be submissive, be respectful. Deny, be submissive, be respectful.
Uther: And more recently the bodies of Aulfric and Sophia Tirmawr were found.
Merlin: (confused) What? 😨
Uther: They are sending the corpses to Gaius to analyse them as we speak.
Merlin: (between worried and confused, to himself) But... that's not possible. (thinking) Or is it?
Uther: And why would that not be possible? 🤨
Merlin: (thinking) Shit! (says, trying to stay calm) Because I saw them leave Camelot with Arthur, Sire. They should've been away long ago. Why would someone kill them? Are you… Are you sure it’s them, Sire? (thinking) Deny, be submissive, be respectful. Deny, be submissive, be respectful.
Uther: (thinking) I never said they were killed (says) They could've died in the way. Who knows? Robbers, landslides, wild beasts. There are many hidden dangers on a road trip.
Merlin: Exactly! Maybe even the raiders that sacked their home?
Uther: (laughs dryly) Incredible… you dare to lie to the King right in front of his face. You don't fear the consequences at all.
Merlin: Why would I fear that, Sire? (thinking) Deny, be submissive, be respectful. Deny, be submissive, be respectful.
Uther: Do not insult my intelligence, I'm not Arthur. If you had told me that the garment was yours but you didn't know how it'd got there, I would've believed you. That would've confirmed what Gaius told me about you. That you are a boy without guile and malice, because that is what an honest and pure-hearted person would have said. They would've told the truth even though that would've put them under suspicion because they would trust in their own innocence. But you did the opposite, you denied that this was yours, which shows that you are not only cunning but also calculating. I do not blame you for lying, any wise person would avoid having any connection with murder case's evidence. The thing is that only a person who is aware that a murder occurred would do so, because if Sophia and her father had really left as you say then you wouldn't have seen the need to lie.
Merlin: (thinking, between nervous an impressed)I always wondered how he managed to almost erradicate the entire magic user community, the dragons and almost all the dragonlords. Now I know, he's very fucking smart! Okay, Merlin, just stick to the plan. Deny, be submissive, be respectful. Deny, be submissive, be respectful.(says) Or maybe the neckerchief really is not mine, Sire.
Uther: (enraged, he hits the throne and stands up) Stop lying to your King! Stop thinking you're so clever and disrespecting me! (pulls out the neckerchief and walks to Merlin) I know for a fact that this neckerchief is yours. It’s the only thing I knew for sure before you entered this room. And before you spout any more lies from that vile and poisonous tongue of yours, I can also prove it. (stops infront of Merlin) The first thing I did upon receiving this neckerchief was to research this fabric. This color is something only royalty uses, but there are many royal families in Albion, so each royal family has a different embroidery pattern so they can differentiate their belongings from other royals, and this fabric! (raises the cloth in a fist) was made especially for the Pendragon royal family. This is something only I or my son could wear. It goes without saying that this does not belong to me or Arthur. And before you come up with another pathetic excuse to defend yourself, I'll tell you that each batch that the fabrics are dyed with is not only expensive, but limited. Only a certain amount of purple dye is made each year so only a few yards of fabric are dyed. That's why the yards of fabric my son and I received are all recorded. (takes out log book and opens it) In the last year I received 4 meters of fabric, Arthur 2 meters, of which he used to make a tunic and... guess what he did with the leftover? A neckerchief (closes book and puts it back in his pocket)
Merlin: ...
Uther: So what do you have to say for yourself now?
Merlin: (thinking) Deny, be submissive, be respectful. Deny, be submissive, be respectful. (says in the calmest voice he can) I don't know what you want me to say, Sire. It seems like you already decided I'm guilty.
Uther: (drops the neckerchief and lifts his sword at Merlin, threatening) Where are Aulfric and Sophia?
Merlin: (thinking) Deny, be submissive, be respectful! Deny, be submissive, be respectful! (says) Didn't you just say you found the bodies, Sire?
Uther: (raises his voice) Don't play dumb with me! You knew they weren't found! Where did you hide them?!
Merlin: I didn't kill them!
Uther: One more lie and I'll cut your throat! At first I thought you were just some peasant after some coins, but your ambition was way bigger, wasn't it?
Merlin: (thinking) Deny, be submissive, be respectful! Deny, be submissive, be respectful!
Uther: And, since Lady Sophia was getting in the way of your plans, you got rid of her! An innocent, lovely lady-
Merlin: Oh, please! She was anything but innocent.
Uther: (can't believe the audacity) What?
Merlin: (thinking) Fuck! Deny, be... how was it? (says) I mean, how do you know she was innocent, Sire? You are SO suspicious of me, and yet didn't bother to corroborate Aulfric's story was true at all! "We are from Tirmawr and our home was sacked by raiders, boo", really? Anybody could enter the castle claiming they're nobels like that! But sure, lets invite these outsiders we've never seen in our lifes. What do we have to be afraid of? It's not like we are someone important like royalty and recieve assesinations attemps on a daily basis! (composes himself)... Sire.
Uther: (lets out a small laugh of triumph) So that's the excuse you gave Arthur! That they were impostors that were trying to kill him, so that he would cover for you.
Merlin: No! I'm just saying they could've been-
Uther: If Sophia really wanted to kill the Prince of Camelot she would've waited til they were alone at their honeymoon. Yet she ran away, because YOU humiliated her! And do you really want me to believe Arthur wouldn't be able to defend himself of a defenseless young lady and an old man? Arthur, a trained knight!.
Merlin: (thinking, trying very hard no to explode) Submissive and respectful. Stay submissive and repectful (says, gritting his teeth) I'm just saying first impressions aren't always the right ones and it's not wise to understimate people even if they look harmless, Your Majesty.
Uther: Oh, I'm definitely not going to understimate you. (sheaths his sword) I heard what I needed to hear. You're days here in Camelot are over. You are going to go back to your stinky little village with nothing but what you're wearing and never return!
Merlin: (shouts, alarmed) What?! You can't do that! You can't separate me from Arthur!
Uther: (shouts back) I'm the king, so yes I can! And if you dare to cross the border you'll be executed immediately. I'm never letting you near my son again!
Merlin: (his face contorts with disbelief, anguish and anger, thinking) Deny-submi-respec-FUCK IT, FUCK IT ALL! (suddenly, he laughs and laughs and laughs, saying) You are so, SO funny!
Uther: (surprised at his reaction, but says very serious) I don't recall saying anything funny.
Merlin: (Stops laughing) Sorry, let me correct myself. You are SO SCARED it's funny.
Uther: ...What?
Merlin: You say you are so certain I killed Aulfric and Sophia, but instead of just arresting and execute me for murder, you had to lock up Arthur in the dungeons for what? To make this stupid test and then threaten to do stuff you can't actually do, because you know Arthur wouldn't allow it! The truth is, Uther Pendragon, you can't do ANYTHING to me. You can't HURT me.
Uther: (slaps Merlin, furious)
Meanwhile, with Arthur in the dungeons.
Arthur: (trying to force the door open) Come on. Come on!
Sir Innprudence: (from the celd beside) It's useless, Sire. We tried.
Sir Ewan: (from the celd in the other side) No, we didn't!
Sir Innprudence: Right, we didn't, because that's wrong.
Arthur: What are you doing here?
Sir Ewan: You sent us here, Sire.
Sir Innprudence: And it's being a nightmare! I miss my family and friends. I'm starting to forget their faces! 😭
Arthur: You've just been here for a day. 😒
Sir Innprudence: But you've been here for less than an hour and you're trying to escape, sire.
Sir Ewan: (scolds) Innprudence! 😠 (to Arthur) I'm sure that's not what you were really doing, Sire.😅
Arthur: No, that's exactly what I'm doing. My father is planning to do something to Merlin, I don't know what, but if he had to imprisoned me here to do it, it mustn't be good. I have to get out, now!
Sir Innprudence: Well, I have a little spoon here, Sire. Maybe we could use it to make a hole in the wall-
Arthur: That would take years!
Sir Ewan: I managed to make a stick with a little hook to try to grab the keys, but the guards that have them are too far.
Arthur: So it's pointless.
Sir Ewan: ...yeah.
Arthur: (exasperated, to the ceiling) Can't I have a useful knight for once? Just once!
Sir Ewan: I'm sorry, Sire.
Sir Innprudence: There isn't really much we can do. The King's will is above anyone else's.
Arthur: (to himself, whispering) The King... (calls out one of the guards) Hey, you! Come here! Your future King is talking to you!
Guard: (comes) Do you need something, Sire?
Arthur: I demand to be release this instant.
Guard: That's not possible, Sire. The King-
Arthur: Your King now.
Guard: ...Excuse me, Sire?
Arthur: My father won't be King forever. And, once he passes, I'll be your King. A King who will remember this very day when he was imprisoned against his will. And guess who is going to be the first to receive my rage?
Guard: ...
Arthur: However, if you help me out now. Rage will be replaced by gratitude that will come in the form of lands, money... or even status. More than enough for you and your family.
Guard: (tempted, but scared) Sire... please. I can't disobey the King. It's treason.
Arthur: What are you talking about? You didn't disobey the King. I got a hold of you and you fighted hard, but I'm a very skilled knight, so I managed to knock you out and that's when a took your keys and escaped.
Guard: ...
Arthur: So? The keys?
Guard: (pulling out the key, still doubtful) But... if the King finds out...
Arthur: (smiles, reassuring) He won't find out. I'll make it believable. (extends his hand) The keys.
Guard: (extends the hand with the keys)
Arthur: (pulls his arm instead and hits his head with the iron bars)
Guard: (falls to the floor, unconscious)
Arthur: I told I'd make it believable. (takes the keys and opens the cell) Thank you. (leaves running)
Sir Innprudence: Wait! Sire!
Sir Ewan: You forgot about us! Sire!
Sir Innprudence: ...
Sir Ewan:...
Sir Innprudence: Hey, I think your stick might work now. He left the keys there.
Back at the throne room.
Merlin: (brings a hand to his cheek, eyes wide in shock and offended)
Uther: (with barely contained fury and hatred) Until you finally showed your real face, scum. Who do you think you are to speak to me like that? You are nothing but a serving boy!
Merlin: I'm much more than that.
Uther: (red with fury) How dare you? (shouts) You are speaking to your King!
Merlin: (shouts back) You are NOT my King! Arthur is. And he will be a better and more worthy king that you ever were.
Uther: (about to slap him again)
Merlin: (stops Uther's hand by holding his wrist midway) I don't think so.
Uther: (even more red with fury) You! Little- (brings a hand to his chest suddenly in pain)
Merlin: (all his boldness gone) Sire?
Uther: (twitches and falls to the ground)
Merlin: (in panic) Sire! (kneels and starts checking him frantic, but there is no response and thinks) Oh, Gods! OH GODS! I killed him. I killed the King! No, no, no, no, no! This wasn't supposed to happen so soon! What have I done?! Am I mad? Why did I say all those things? I think I believed he was Uther's ghost for a second. Well, he is a ghost now... NO! He can't be dead! Arthur will be devasted! He can't be dead! Please, please, please, wake up!
Arthur: (opens the door with force and enters, frantic and worried) Merlin! (stares in shock at the scene before him)
Merlin: (looks up in panic and tears of desperation and guilt run down his eyes) Arthur, I-I don't what happened-I didn't-I didn't mean to. He was...and then I...I'm so sorry!
Arthur: (walks to Merlin in silence)
Merlin: (in more panic) I swear on my mother's life I didn't think this would happen. Arthur, please, belie-
Arthur: (kneels and hugs Merlin)
Merlin: ...
Arthur: (pulls away just enough so he looks at Merlin in the eye) Are you alright? He didn't do anything to you?
Merlin: (confused) Uhm... not really.
Arthur: (cups Merlin's face with one hand and hardens his features) He hit you.
Merlin: (getting out of his stupor) It's nothing. But, Arthur, your father! (points at Uther, alarmed)
Arthur: (gives Uther a glance in silence. Then stands up, pulling Merlin with him and calls out) Guards!
Guards: (enter)
Arthur: The King fainted. Bring the Court Physician inmediatly.
Guards: (worried) Yes, Sire (leave quickly)
Merlin: (thinking, a strange feeling in his guts) How... how is that the guards seemed more worried than Arthur himself?
...
Let's remeber this happened before the events of "To kill a King" and "La Morte d'Arthur", so no, Uther didn't die. But how did Merlin get away with insulting and almost killing the King? What did Arthur do? You can make your guesses in the comments ☺️
Tagging @aceauthorcatqueen , @fallenxjas , @smileytrinity ,@lucifertookmyshoe , @an-entity-i-think , @thecornerofbelu , @griffonskies , @odinjm , @cinnabon-sweetroll-tiramisu , @thelady-mary , @bennedict , @nightninjaboy , @st8-of-grace , @star-rie , @error-username-not-available , @dogberryrowan , @jamieweasley13 , @tansyuduri , @tercais , @robynnemrys , @evadne01 , @serasvictoria02 , @hairdryerducks , @hopeaha , @curiously-lazy , @ harriettesthings , @andrealux16 , @wacko-weirdo , @greatdonutenemy , @yougottobekittenme , @anxiousosaurus , @kinkforwings , @someweirdassnamee , @impracticalantlers , @miyriu , @hobipabo , @whitemaskcd
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felassan · 4 months
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Hello friend :) I was wondering if there is a definitive list of known spies of Fen'harel? In Trespasser we meet one ("The elven guard that led you to the Qunari body, who intercepted the servant with the gaatlock barrel? Mine.") but can't remember if there are any other such cases we can look back on. Thanks!!!
hello! ◕‿◕ oh, good question! I don’t know that there is a definitive list.
there is the elven lady - the guard from Trespasser - as you say
Solas mentions in Trespasser, but doesn’t name of course, the existence of multiple spies of his that were within the Inquisition (the ones that “tripped over” the Qunari spies within the Inquisition)
a Trespasser epilogue slide reads “After the events at the Winter Palace, elves left the Inquisition under mysterious circumstances, as did elven servants across Thedas. None could say where they went, but those who believed the Inquisitor's story about Fen'Harel wondered just how large the Dread Wolf's forces were... and what the ancient elven rebel had planned.” – it’s likely that at least some of these were working as his agents/spies at the time of the events of DA:I, and those that weren't, well, they’ve left their lives in Thedas to go join him and are his agents now. tying to this, in Tevinter Nights, the rumors going around Thedas that “dozens” of elves have gone to join him are mentioned
In Half Up Front in TN, there is the elf who hired Irian and Vadis to try and steal Dumat’s Folly, who then poisoned herself rather than be caught
In the same short story, Gatt mentions a male agent of Fen’Harel who was within the ranks of the Ben-Hassrath, explaining that he tricked them also into trying to steal Dumat’s Folly
In Dread Wolf Take You in TN, the Carta Assassin relates his tale and it has three elven agents in it: the one with the regular Fereldan accent (as opposed to Dalish) who is presumably a former Fereldan City Elf, the one whose accent does sound Dalish only more formal and poetic (who from this is implied to be an ancient elf**), and the Dalish elf who they accidentally killed, who was the one to originally make contact with the Carta assassin’s boys and who told them that he learned of the idol being in the statue of Meredith from a dream.
Felassan, of course
Gaius, from the comic Dragon Age: Deception
** not a wild idea, Felassan was another example, there are also groups around like Abelas and the sentinels in the Temple of Mythal, Solas alludes to other groups of them too in DA:I with his dialogue line to Abelas "There are other places, friend. Other duties. Your [ancient elvhen] people yet linger." were these other duties.. being agents of Fen'Harel and helping out Solas with his plans?
Honorable mentions:
at one point the Qunari thought Solas himself was an agent of Fen’Harel (Charred Note reads "These walls of blue flame were cast by the agent of Fen'Harel as he ran through this place bringing chaos and destruction. [...] Fen'Harel's mage-servant made them to hamper us, and they bring only death.")
at one point the Qunari thought the Inquisitor was an agent of Fen’Harel
his agents once tried to recruit Irian Cestes, but she turned them down.
(lmk if there’s any I missed.) :>
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achillesuwu · 1 year
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People said that Merlin would never leave Camelot on his own but
But
Hear me out
What about amnesiac Merlin? Depending on when it happens :
1. There is no dragon to tell him about prophecy
2. If Gaius is not there for X or Y reason he would not know about the prophecy
3. If he get amnesia when he is outside of Camelot for (exemple he fellowed some dude in the wood and then killed him) he won't even meet Arthur and thinks "oh maybe there is a reason why I stay 🤔
Like, amnesiac Merlin has zero (0) reason to even wonder if he has a life in Camelot. After all, why would a sorcerer like him live there?
I think Amnesiac Merlin is a fucking unexplored golden mine.
"I can't take you apart with less then that" merlin but with some "I have 0 trauma about living in a kingdom where magic is outlaw/they will enslave you for it" meeting his friends again? Can you imagine the angst? The betrayal?
Or Merlin who work for another kingdom? Arthur who find Merlin years later because Camelot doesn't really have good relationship with magic friendly kingdom.
Amnesiac Merlin who get "fired" (Merlin : oh, well, guess I will go somewhere else?) / get told he was "fired" / resign (Arthur : *pikachu face* when it happens) and has 0 feeling about the whole thing because it's just a job, right?
Or Merlin who live in a little cottage in the wood with his dragon child?
You can even put MORE angst if Merlin doesn't believe Arthur when he says they know each other. After all it isn't the first time someone try to get Emrys ™ on their side.
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veryace-ficrecs · 8 months
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Merlin Magic Reveal Fic Recs
This list will include all ratings and tags, so read at your own discretion! :)
Prioritizing is a Thing, Merlin, Look it Up~ by Merlioske - Rated M
Gaius has a Paper Door and is Far Too Loud for someone with Secrets to keep. or Merlin you /idiot/ Privacy Wards maybe??? or Magical beasts don't die from steel and Arthur finally Gets a Clue.
Wanted: One Merlin. Big Ears. Memory of King Arthur Optional. by watchriverdale - Rated T
Merlin had been having quite a good day, actually, until some bloke calling himself King Arthur turned up and tried to get him to run away with him.
A Tapestry of Scars by psychotic_fangirl369 - Rated G
“It’s okay,” he said, although it really, really wasn’t. “I’m okay. Look, all I’ve got is a scar!” And he lifted his shirt up to show Arthur the new scar from todays death.
That was the wrong thing to do. Arthur paled and reached out, yanking Merlin’s shirt over his head and tossing it aside.
“Hey!” Merlin grumbled, but shut up the instant Arthur’s fingers were on his chest.
“So many,” Arthur murmured. “Merlin, there are so many.”
“So many what?”
“Scars.”
Or, the one where Merlin is immortal and Arthur finds out.
Branded for Gold by arcturus7 - Rated M
Years of calling Merlin the idiot, it turns out it is him that is the idiot. Not just any idiot. An absolute buffoon. An useless, oblivious, tunic. Heck, even a tunic is more observant than he is.
OR
Merlin's a badass mf, as always. Arthur is impossibly in love (he doesn't know it yet). They take down a few bandits. More than just a few.
You Know What They Say by DragonflyonBreak - Rated G
Nothing good ever comes from eavesdropping. Or, that one time Leon and Gwaine decided to commit treason.
Unexpected meetings by dreaminreality - Not Rated
When Merlin, Arthur and the knights decided to go for a hunt they didn't expect to be attacked, or to run in to the Dragon Arthur is sure he was supposed to have killed.
all oak and iron bound by numinousnumbat - Rated M
Some of those born with magic are repelled by iron. Merlin wished he knew how much iron there was in Camelot before he started his new life there.
In A Name by StarlightInHerEyes22 - Rated G
In the middle of some quest or another, Merlin, Arthur and the knights find themselves stuck in the middle of a shrine being told that, if they wish to proceed unharmed, they need only speak their true names and titles. Straight-forward enough, right? Wrong. Merlin really hates the Old Religion sometimes.
They Can Only Cut Your Head Off Once by Drag0nst0rm - Rated G
In hindsight, handing the exhausted Arthur his breakfast before announcing, "I need you to cut my head off," was possibly not the best way to introduce the subject.
Into Thin Air by foxy_mulder - Rated T
Merlin has fulfilled his destiny. Albion is united and magic is restored to the land- but nothing in the prophecies had mentioned what to do afterward. Merlin's old roles are suddenly filled by people more competent than him, and there is no need for him any longer.
 
So Merlin disappears.
Where the Lost Things Go by EmrysOfStorybrooke - Rated G
When one started receiving lost items from their soulmate, it was supposed to be an exciting day. It was an opportunity to learn things about them and about their life. People loved making speculations about who their soulmate was based on the clothes, childhood toys, or other things that their soulmate lost, and therefore ended up in their possession. Everything was going fine until Merlin found a crown belonging to the prince of Camelot.
Hot Water by LadyAJ_13 - Rated G
Leon shuffles, a move so unlike him that Arthur is immediately concerned. “It's about Merlin, sire.” He wonders what he's done now. Something stupid no doubt, insulted a noblewoman or broken something valuable. A day in the stocks might be required to make the aggrieved party happy. But then, that's not unusual enough for his most capable knight to be fiddling with his sword scabbard. “I believe he has magic.”
Would You Let Me Die by Noel803 - Rated M
What if Arthur was awake when Merlin reveals his magic to Uther’s ghost? Plus a few other minor changes to turn this scene into the hurt/comfort I desire.
Five lessons on how to not kill your best friend by injeong - Rated T
In which Arthur Pendragon gets kidnapped by a strange mystical being who decides that the best way for him to learn about the things he doesn't know is to send him to five different alternate futures in which his past self had made the wrong choices. Arthur gets a sneak peak preview of what could happen if he messes up majorly, ends up discovering more than a few things about himself and Merlin, and has to make a choice on everything he's ever known. aka Five alternate futures in which Merlin is not having a good time (due to alternate-future Arthur) and present-Arthur decides that he is not letting that happen, ever
Strange Lights by Noel803 - Rated M
Throughout Arthur's life a strange blue light has seemed to always save him when he needs it the most. All Arthur wants is to find out who is behind this little helpful light so he can thank them. The pieces finally start to come together when he gets a new manservant.
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This sounds like it could be terrible for everyone involved! 10 for Gaius and Rytlock if you're still doing the writing prompts!
The Way You Said "I Love You"...
Not to me
Rytlock didn’t like waiting. It wasn’t that he was impatient, not really, but when there was nothing he could do but wait, he began to feel useless. What was the point in being a four-hundred pound wall of sharp teeth and sharper instinct if there was nowhere to direct that ferocity? At some point he’d learned that sometimes it was better to wait–he didn’t know when it’d happened, but life was like that. You clawed and roared and railed and suddenly half the soldiers you grew up with were ashes spread throughout the valley and your bones ached and your cub was betraying everything you stood for. 
His tail lashed and he shivered, wishing that there was something–anything–for him to fight. A fight would be easy, much easier than huddling in an icebound cave. Anything that wasn’t waiting for Horncleaver to wake up.
The commander’s face and right paw were covered in bandages; makeshift rags torn from Rytlock’s own clothes. It was hard to look at Horncleaver as he lay there–he looked small, and peaceful, and not at all the way he’d looked when he’d died, but wasn’t this how it worked when war didn’t take you? The last time, he’d been torn and ragged, ferocity frozen in a defiant snarl. This was slow and peaceful and awful while those who were left watched, and even though it wasn’t Rytlock’s fault this time, he couldn’t shake the lingering guilt.
“When he wakes up, you should tell him how you feel,” Crecia commented from where she sat nearby. “Glad that got you to stop snarling at thin air.”
“Don’t know what you’re talking about,” Rytlock growled–it was harsher than he’d intended, but with Cre, when wasn’t he? He could never be direct and say what he wanted; that was a conflict she’d never shared.
“You love him, fool. You should tell him, before he moves on without you.”
He turned, finally peeling his eyes off of Horncleaver, and found her watching him tiredly. Her chartreuse eyes didn’t seem bitter, but–he stopped that thought before it could go further. It’d been the dragon wringing those words from their throats back in the marshes. There was no need to bring up that hurt, however true it may have been–or however much they believed it to be, at least. Despite himself, the growl still grew in his throat, and Crecia cut him off with a sigh. 
“I know you, Rytlock. I’ve known you a long time, and I know, even before this mess,” Cre paused, gesturing around the cave, “you were mooning after the commander during the whole rally, like he’d hung the stars. It doesn’t take a love doctor to see it; seeing him in action, I can’t even say I don’t understand why.”
And, burn her, she wasn’t wrong. At any point that Horncleaver wasn’t avoiding him or he himself wasn’t busy, Rytlock was watching him. He’d approached once or twice, but for the most part, just allowed the commander to feel out the valley on his own, even when showing him around was the best excuse in the book. No, there was no chance Rytlock would have actually spoken to him–being in the valley was too disorienting, altogether too nostalgic and too different all at once.
“Doesn’t matter if I love him, Cre. I already fucked over that ship.” He lashed his tail and huddled closer to the fire. “Just like I did with you.”
Cre sighed. “That’s not an apology.”
Gaius whistled through his nose, and Rytlock wondered, vaguely, if he was dreaming, and what it might be about. That damned Norn arrow–or rather the bow, Rytlock supposed–was keeping him under, and the anxiety of waiting for Horncleaver to surface turned into a morbid curiosity for whatever it was the sleeping charr might be experiencing. He remembered, distinctly, that Gaius had never told him what it had been like when he was dead. 
To be fair, though, he hadn’t answered when Gaius asked what had happened in the Mists, and well. One thing had definitely led to the other.
“You’re snarling again,” Cre sighed.
“I haven’t said anything.” 
“It’s on your face. Don’t you feel your muzzle pulling up?”
Rytlock felt his hackles rise, and he found himself on his feet, standing over her. “My muzzle’s none of your business, Cre. Leave it.”
Rytlock turned and stomped away from the fire and towards–nowhere. Outside the cave the wind howled like ghosts calling their names, carrying snow not in flakes but in thick, congregating flurries that threatened to strand them if it kept up as it was. He sighed and kicked against the growing wall of snow, causing the accumulation to collapse into the cave and cover his paws in the frosty stuff.
“When you’ve realized you can’t run away from this like everything else, why don’t you come back here and change his wraps?”
“And what,” Rytlock asked, brows furrowing as he turned, “does that mean?”
“It means exactly what I said, Rytlock. When things don’t go your way, you get angry, and then you run. But there’s nowhere to go out here, unless you want to wander right into the grave, or worse, into Jormag’s claws. So you finally have a chance to confront something and make up for one of your fuckups, or are you going to gripe and groan until your pet dragon comes and saves us all, and you can keep on pretending–poorly I might add–that you don’t care?”
“She’s not a pet!”
“You all keep saying that, and I’m still not sure what it means. It’s not your pet, and it’s not a weapon, but it is a dragon.”
Rytlock crouched over Gaius and busied himself with peeling a shred of what had been Rytlock’s undershirt off his face. He wondered, idly, if he’d so those eyes look his way again; a moment later, he realized this one was a loss. “She’s as close to a daughter as he’s gonna get.”
Crecia was quiet while Rytlock tended to Gaius, long enough that he was almost done and was beginning to think that she’d finally moved on when she spoke.
“You changed the subject.”
“Why won’t you let it be?”
“There’s nothing else for us to talk about,” she said, pointedly. Rytlock growled, but knew better than to challenge her, given how low the bar was for more preferential conversation topics. 
“I don’t know what you want me to do, Cre. He’s not even conscious. He might not–”
“He’s going to wake up. I want you to be ready for that.”
“So?”
“So practice, Rytlock. Tell him what you need to.” 
Rytlock huffed, and the wind howled outside their cave. He felt very much as if he was on the spot, even though Gaius wasn’t even conscious, and Crecia was more or less inconsequential to what he had to say. He paused, and considered; he didn’t want to sound desperate–and then he felt stupid. It didn’t matter how desperate he sounded now, that was the point of practice.
“You haven’t said anything yet,” Crecia observed.
“I’m thinking.”
Or, of course, desperation was what he needed. Maybe if he’d fucking pushed aside his shame, and anger, and…fear, Horncleaver wouldn’t have spent the entire rally as far away from him as he could get. 
“I love you,” he hears himself whisper. He knows the murmur is easily lost in the howling of the wind, and he clenches his eyes shut tight and wrings the remains of the bandages in his paws as if tearing it to shreds would make it give the commander back his sight. 
He remembers the fear and the guilt that had followed him like a dark cloud back in Elona, and the disgust in Horncleaver’s eyes when he’d offered him Sohothin to replace his souldagger in the confrontation against Balthazar.
“I love you, Gaius.”
There was a rustle of fabric, and a groan, and Rytlock opened his eyes, holding his breath, as Horncleaver shifted, and remained unconscious. Rytlock watched his chest rise and fall for several moments, and then felt a whisper tickle the back of his mind, “‘I love you’ isn’t an apology.”
Rytlock inhales shakily and shifts his gaze away; Crecia is watching him, but he can't tell if there's bitterness in her eyes. He doesn't say anything else, and they wait in silence for the blizzard to end.
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tiodolma · 1 year
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You know that moodboard you reblogged of Merlin and Morgana not being able to sleep? You know what occurred to me?
I'm thinking of season 3. These two with their love/hate thing and UST going on and their fights about evil plans, and you know... What if in one of those heating discussions, Morgana accidentally blurts out that she felt something and a lot of things for Merlin before the poisoning fiasco and then Merlin admitting the same.
And like both are in their minds... 😳 Oh, crap, what did I just said? So, both flee from each other, because this isn't good at all and neither can now sleep because of the whole situation. 😂😂
..... ok meta time
I think morgana has been honest enough even in s3 though (heck through s4-s5). Merlin is the more guarded one.
Based on Colin Morgan’s interpretation in many interviews, Merlin was the one who was self-aware enough that he loved her and deeply cared for her at some point. The show confirms that sort of acting decision coz he’s also always revealing his true feelings for her in front of kilgharrah and gaius. (plus the other character/actors have talked about it)
Meanwhile Katie Mcgrath doesn’t characterize Morgana in that way: that Morgana was self-aware enough that she loved him. I am of the opinion that Morgana was still on her way to falling in love with him when Fires of IDirsholas happened. All we know is that she deeply feels for him to the point where even Morgause didn't seem to know the whole depth of her feelings. KM insists that Morgana only wanted Merlin’s honesty and trust. We can see it In the show. Morgana had always told Merlin what she felt about him.
So if there was one who should admit their feelings then it should be Merlin.
Morgana already laid out everything she felt for him from S1-S3: “you are the actual hero here!” “I am your friend” "i don't feel so alone here," "i trust merlin” "you’re a good friend” “i have magic, merlin” “I now know what i am”. “i am afraid merlin” “i get that you only wanted to protect your friends” “i am upset that i was poisoned and you hurt me” “why should i care about people who dont care about me?” “Uther hates me and everyone like me” “you dont know how it is be be an outsider” “i thought we were friends then why are you against me if you understand me like what you claimed” “how can you hope to understand” “i dont really get you.” “Make me understand, merlin” "you're just a pathetic lowly serving boy to me," "you're a thorn in my side," "you condemned me to live in this poor state."
Meanwhile merlin is always like "i care for her", "i trust her," "she should be told that magic can be a force for good and it can be a gift" "she has a good heart," "she’s my friend," "i know her," "i feel sad for her," "she’s undergoing a hard time," "i understand her most of all," "i shouldnt have trusted her," "i dont wanna be bitter, angry and so full of hate like her," "i will never be like her," "i thought we were the same”
---but he says these only To the dragon and Gaius.
See how they contrast? With regards to to his feelings for Morgana, Merlin is only honest to his bosses, meanwhile Morgana is honest of her feelings for Merlin towards Merlin himself.
Merlin and Morgana were never meeting/fighting on the same ground.
It's honestly heartbreaking, especially since Merlin never holds back on saying the same wonderful words of affirmation to Arthur, to Gwen, to the Knights, to Freya, to literally everybody else.. but he could never say them to Morgana's face.
btw saying only "i understand" and not much else sometimes isn't enough anymore.
....
I honestly do not know what else Morgana could say that will push Merlin to honesty. I think she might as well strip herself naked and he still wouldn't give in (and s4 showed us that he can and will use that kind of weakness against her. he already used her nightmares against her after all).
All I’m saying is that Morgana had always been so so so vulnerable and raw in front of him. Normally that would give an opening to the other person to let down their guard and rely on her. (see agravaine, helios, aithusa, mordred)
But Merlin never did that. He had so many chances to tell her the truth and be vulnerable himself but he never allowed himself that kind of right in front of her. We know that he desperately wanted to but he couldn't because had been repeatedly and ceaselessly warned/conditioned/brainwashed/manipulated that it was the worst idea, that going against his job orders will have consequences.
.....
But as they are in s3? where they are just free to pursue whatever goals they have independent of each other... with how radicalized and extremist they both already are? With how Merlin has already lost at least 4 loved ones for the sake of protecting camelot and destiny (sunken cost fallacy and all that)? nah. I can't see him being honest to anyone, especially enemies who have done and said things he morally detests, anymore.
Personally i think the only way for merlin to finally tell her his truth is to trap both them in some situation where they have to work together, or where morgana’s magic isnt enough , or where they both have no magic, or where the have joint responsibility of another life. THEY HAVE TO BE TRAPPED. TRAP THEM TOGETHER.
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luminara123 · 2 years
Text
Chapter Four: The Dragon’s Call
    “Hey, Gaius… can I talk with you about something?” I said gently as I walked to go sit next to him at his work bench. 
    “Yes, dear. What’s bothering you” 
    “It’s Lady Helen,” I answered vaguely.
    “What about her? Does this have to do with your knowledge of the future?”
    “Uhhh, In a way yes. I find myself having this knowledge and wondering if I should do something about it? I just don’t want to mess things up…”I began to tear up a little and Gaius placed his hand on mine in a fatherly comfort kind of way. “Lady Helen… the one that’s here. She’s not what she seems”.
    “What do you mean?”
    “Do you remember the man who was executed a few days ago” he nodded,” well his mother had promised to avenge him. She said Uther would share in her tears before the end of the celebrations. ‘An eye for an eye. A tooth for a tooth. A son for a son’... if my knowledge is correct, then she killed the real Lady Helen and took her place. She’s plotting to kill the Prince” I explained worriedly.
    “Oh dear… the ‘show’, is that what you called it?”
    “Yeah”
    “What does it say about the outcome?”
    “Arthur survives. I don’t know what I can say about it. It could prevent that favorable outcome from happening…”
    “Then, what do you need advice on? You seem to know what you can do. What worries you?” Gaius asked, confused.
    “What if my being here has already changed more than I could ever imagine”
    “I’m sorry, I don’t have the answers you need”
    “That's alright, Gaius. I am going to find Merlin”
    “Be careful”
    “I will” I figured I would find him in the lower town by now. Once I got there, I could hear the ruckus of Arthur and Merlin bickering. 
    “Ahhh, don’t run away,” Arthur teased.
    “From you?” Merlin answered.
    “Thank, God! I thought you were deaf as well as dumb” First of all that is offensive to the deaf community but he is already a Prat, so I guess just another thing to work on.
    “Look I’ve told you, you were a Part. I just didn’t realize that you were a royal one” (I know the show is different but I don’t particularly like curse words so I am changing it a round a bir)
    “I could take you apart with one blow”
    “I could take you apart with less than that” Merlin started and then noticed me in the crowd behind Arthur and his knight ‘friends’. I shook my head to tell him this was a bad idea, but he never listens to me when it comes to things like this.
    “Are you sure”
    Merlin took off his jacket and Arthur tossed him a mase,”there you go, big man”. Unfortunately, Merl did not catch the weapon so he had to pick it up off the hay covered ground.
    “I warn you. I’ve been trained to kill since birth”
    “Wow, and how long have you been training to be a Prat?”
    “I told you, you can’t address me like that”
    “Sorry. How long have you been training to be a Prat, my lord?” the knights ‘oooh’ed(?) as Merlin, the idiot, did a fake bow to Arthur. Arthur swung the mace at Merl and the infamous fight began. I decided best just to stand back and watch. Then, I can lecture Merlin later on about his stupidity and apparent death wish. 
    Crowds of people gathered to watch as the two spared/fought one another. In the end, despite Merlin’s efforts (magic), he lost. Luckily, Arthur decided to let him go. I walked up to him as Arthur finished talking to him, you know the whole ‘there’s something about you Merlin’ thing. I walked up to him silently, grabbed his arm and dragged him to the chambers.
    “How could you be so foolish!!”
    “He needed to be taught a lesson”
    “Magic must be studied, mastered, and used for good! Not for idiotic pranks!”
    “What is it that there is to master? I could move objects like that before I could talk!”
    “Then by now you should know how to control yourself!”
    “I don’t want to! If I can’t use magic then what have I got? I’m just a nobody and I always will be. If I can’t use magic, I might as well die” Merlin turned to go into our room.
    “Merlin. Merl. Wait!” I said I got into the room and shut the door so that we may have some privacy between friends.
    “What! Are you here to lecture me about my misuse of magic too?”
    I sat next to him on his bed,”No” he furrowed his eyebrows,”I just wanted to say that you're not a nobody. No person ever is. You are more than just your magical gifts… your someone’s son, you My best friend. You’re a kind and funny person, with the most sass I have ever seen in anyone from this time. You accepted me for me, when most would have assumed I’d gone mad”
    “You really think all of that?” he asked as he looked at me with teary eyes,
    “Of course I do” I pulled him into a hug,”don’t ever forget”. We sat there for a while hugging and then Gaius entered, holding a few vials and clothes.
    “Come here and take your shirt off” He instructed as he came to sit down on the opposite side of Merlin that I was. 
    “You don’t know why I was born like this, do you?”
    Gaius replied with a simple, “No”, as he began to treat Merlin’s bruises and I grabbed Merlin’s hand as a show of support.
    “I’m not a monster, am I” Merlin let out with a dry laugh.
    “Don’t ever think that” Gaius said seriously as he looked Merlin in the eyes.
    “Then why am I like this? Please, I need to know. Why?”
    “Maybe there is someone with more knowledge than me”
    “If you can’t tell me than no one can”
    “Uhh. Maybe I could help, even just a little..” I hesitantly said as they both turned to look at me.
    “I can’t tell you everything I know, at least not yet… but I can say that your magic has a purpose. A good one at that and I know that very soon you are going to meet someone much wiser than me. Someone who has been around much longer than me and has way more knowledge”
    “Can you tell me when? Who?” Merlin asked desperately.
    “I don’t know… I really, really want to. I just don’t want to mess things up” Merlin looked at me extremely confused but somewhat relieved. 
    “You’re really cryptic sometimes, you know that?”
    “Yeah, sorry”
    “Here, drink this. It’s for pain” Gaius handed Merlin a vial of an orange-ish brown liquid. Which he gulped down and winced.
    I stirred in my sleep that night and heard Merlin get up and leave. I guess he is finally going to meet ‘The Great Dragon’. It is really late and I don’t want to follow him though. I will ask him about it in the morning in private. Maybe some other day I will go talk to Kiligarah and ask him if he knows how I ended up here.
    ‘Oi!! Have you seen the state of this room!” Gaius came in yelling the next morning.
    “Not my fault” I pointed at Merlin,”it’s all him”
    “It just happens” With that I rolled my eyes and left the room as I was already dressed for the day. 
    While Merlin delivered Morgana’s sleeping draught. I figured he can deal with that all on his own. It certainly will be funny to hear about later from his point of view. Oh no, that also means that poor girl is going to get killed by Mary and I don’t know where her room is. Crap!
    We arrived at the banquet hall where we were helping Gaius with whatever needed done. Just after us, the Lady Morgana entered the hall closely followed by Gwen. I swear I could hear Arthyr whisper,’God have mercy’ under his breath. If only he knew that she was his sister. Man, wouldn’t that be a different response altogether. 
    “She looks great doesn’t she?” Gwen asked Merlin and I as she walked up to us.
    “Yes” we both answered at the same time.
    “Some people are just born to be Queen,” Qwen added.
    Merlin faked a shocked, “No, really?”. I know that she really won’t be queen but Qwen will with luck. No that I would ever tell her that. It’s for her to figure out.
    “I hope so. One day. Not that I’d want to be her. Who’d wanna marry Arthur?” You would, I thought.
    “Oh come on, Gwen. I thought you liked those real, rough, tough, save the world kind of men” I nudged him for that comment.
    “No, I like more ordinary men. Like you” Merwen for the win. 
    “Qwen, believe me,  I’m not ordinary”
    “Oh! I didn’t mean you. Just, I like much more ordinary me, like you” she added nervously.
    “Thanks” Harsh one, Gwen. It is ok, I know she didn’t mean it like that.
    We all took our places as Uther entered and gave his speech and introduced ‘Lady Helen, of Mora’ and the sleep spell began. Everyone began to fall asleep so Merlin and I covered our ears and I slowly made my way towards Arthur while Merlin focused on stopping Mary. In the end, Merlin and I both pulled Arthur out of the way of the dagger. Everyone was shocked by what had just occurred. While Uther decided to award not only Merlin, but me as well. Which caught me by surprise as he also made me Arthur's servant. That should be interesting.
    Once we arrived back in our chambers, I gave Gaius and Merlin some space to talk. AKA, the giving of the magic book. Then, a pager came to get us for Arthur.
    “Seems you destiny awaits’
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layzgal · 1 year
Text
A Merlin Fanfiction thing that will never get finished
I own nothing but my own ideas and o/c’s!! Everything else belongs to its rightful owners!!
(Also, feel free to take ideas but don’t copy the entire thing please. Although this is likely to not get finished, I still treasure it dearly.)
“No young man, no matter how great, can know his destiny.”
~The Great Dragon
    “Merlin come on!” Meris told her twin from the top of the hill.
    “I’m coming hold your horses!” He shouted from the middle of the hill. When he made it to the top he stood there a moment, panting and catching his breath.
    “You’re very slow you know that?” Meris remarked.
    “Why did they have to make this road so hilly?” Merlin panted.
    “Just to annoy you, now come on slow-poke.” Meris began down the hill and her brother came trudging behind her.
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    In Camelot…
    The twins stared in wonder at Camelot, seeing as how they’ve never been outside of their village, it was truly a sight to see. They came into the citadel to find a group of people gathered around something. As the two newcomers watched, they realized it was an execution. As some guards brought out a young man in chains, another man in a crown upon a balcony spoke,
    “Let this serve as a lesson to all. This man, Thomas James Cullens, is adjudged guilty of conspiring to use enchantments and magic, and pressed to the law that I, Uther Pendragon, have decreed that such practices are banned, on penalty of death. I pride myself as a fair and just king, but for the crime of sorcery, there is but one sentence I can pass.” The king nodded to the guard, who made the accused man kneel at the cutting block. The executioner came beside the accused, raised his axe above his head, and brought it down upon the accused as Uther gave the signal, causing a gasp to fall across the crowd and people to look away. “When I came to this land,” Uther explained, “this kingdom was mired in chaos, but with the people’s help magic was driven from the realm, so I declare a festival, to celebrate twenty years since the great dragon was captured, and Camelot freed from the evil of sorcery. “Let the celebrations begin.”
    As the people began to disperse, a cry of grief rang across the citadel. The people parted to reveal an elderly woman with tears streaming down her face. “There is only one evil in this land it is not magic, it is you! With your hatred, and your ignorance,” She pointed to the execution block where the corpse now lay. “you took my son!” Her face turned from grief to anger and her voice became sharper than a knife. “I promise you, before these celebrations are over, you will share my tears. An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a son for a son!”
    “Seize her!” The king ordered.
    The old woman reacted by chanting a spell into her jewel and disappearing into nothing, escaping from the guards.
    “Merlin,” Meris grabbed her brother’s sleeve to get his attention, “you know what this means.” She whispered to him. “No magic.” She told him with a serious voice.
    “I know.” Meris gave him a look. “I know.”
    Meris rolled her eyes. “Come on, let’s find Gaius.”
    After making their way through the castle’s halls to Gaius’s chambers, they waited a moment before Merlin knocked on the door. After a moment they went inside to find Gaius studying some books upon a small loft.
    “Gaius?” Merlin asked, then cleared his throat. Gaius turned, but lost his balance and fell, then the next thing they knew, Gaius lay in a bed that wasn’t there before, unharmed. Meris knew how the bed got there.
     “Merlin!” She hissed at him, then went to Gaius. “Are you alright?”
    “What? What did you just do?” Gaius asked as he got up off the bed. The twins paused, unsure of how to answer. “Answer me!”
    “I… I have no idea what happened.” Merlin uttered.
    “If anyone had seen that…”
    “No that had nothing to do with me-“
    “I know what it was, I just want to know where you learned to do it.”
    “No way.”
    “How is it that you know magic?”
    “I don’t.”
    “Where did you study?”
    “We didn’t learn this from anywhere.” Meris interjected.
    “Are you two lying to me?” Gaius asked in a threatening tone.
    “What do you want us to say?” Meris questioned.
    “The truth!”
    “We were born like this.”
    “That’s impossible.” He paused a moment. “Who are you?”
    “Oh, I have this letter.” Merlin grabbed the letter from his backpack and handed it to Gaius.
    “Well, I don’t have my glasses.”
    “He’s Merlin and I'm Meris.” Meris introduced them.
    “Hunith’s children. But you’re not meant to be here till Wednesday.”
    “It is Wednesday.” Merlin and Meris said together.
    Gaius paused. “Ahh, right then. Well Merlin you can put your bag in there,” He pointed to a doorway right behind him. “and Meris can set hers in there.” He pointed to another room.
    The two began to walk to their new rooms but stopped and began to ask, “You won’t say anything about-“
   “No.” The twins sighed. “Although,” They turned back to face him. “I should say thank you.”
    The two split and went into their rooms. Meris set her bag down on the bed in her room. After unpacking her things she glanced at her closed window, went over, stepped onto a table, opened the window, and gazed out into Camelot. Let’s hope nothing bad happens to any of us. She thought solemnly, reminiscing back to the woman at the execution.
    The next morning…
    Meris, a voice spoke out in her mind. Meris. Her eyes fluttered open to see sunlight streaming through her window. She sat up, stretching the tiredness out of her, got dressed, then went to Gaius’ chambers. Gaius had made porridge, which Meris accepted gladly while Merlin came out of his room.
    “I got you water.” Gaius told him, gesturing to a bucket full of water on the table. “You didn’t wash last night.”
    “Oh, sorry.” Merlin apologized.
    “Help yourself to breakfast.” While Merlin started eating, Gaius knocked over the bucket and Merlin reacted by freezing the bucket in place for a second, then letting it fall. “How did you do that? Did you incant a spell in your mind?”
    “I don’t know any spells.” Merlin said.
    “Then what did you do? There must be something.”
    “It just… happens.” Meris explained.
    “Can you do anything?” Gaius asked Meris as Merlin went to clean the water up.
    “I-I’m not sure, nothing like this has ever happened with me.”
    “Well, we better keep you both out of trouble. You can help me until I can find some paid work for the both of you.” He set a small sack on the table. “Here Merlin, Hollyhock in fever dew for lady Percival and this is for sir Orwin.” He held up a bottle with some yellowish-orange liquid inside. “He’s as blind as a weevil So warn him not to take it all at once.”
    “Okay.” Merlin told him.
    “And here.” Gaius gave Merlin a sandwich to eat. “Off you go.” Merlin went to the door and was about to leave before Gaius told him, “And Merlin, I need hardly tell you that the practice of any form of enchantments will get you killed.” Merlin nodded and left.
    “What do you want me to do?” Meris asked after Merlin left.
    “Well, to keep yourself busy you can sort those old books.” Gaius gestured to a shelf of unorganized books as he mopped up the spilled water.
    Meris went over to the shelf and took a look at the different book titles. They were all out of place so she began to sort them out. Pretty soon Gaius had to run an errand so that left her by herself. She picked up a book with the title Lylye of Medicynes and began to read. For some strange reason, she loved reading the book. She wasn’t one to just read books, not that they had any in their home village, she always stayed with her mother while her brother played with William when they were children.
    “Meris.” Gaius said as he came through the door, startling Meris.
    “Uh, Yes?” She spoke as she quickly put the book up.
    “I don’t suppose you know how to classify wormwood, sage, and balm?”
    “Yes, do you need me to pick you some?”
    “Yes, here.” He handed Meris a basket and sent her off.
    Finding the herbs was easy enough, it was coming back that was troublesome. Meris was walking back past what looked like a training ground for soldiers and knights. She looked and saw a blonde young man holding a familiar black-haired sibling.
    “I’ll have you thrown in jail for that.” The blonde said to Merlin.
    “Who do you think you are, the king?” Merlin replied.
    “No, I’m his son, Arthur.” He put Merlin on his knees and let some guards take him to his cell.
    Meris sighed angrily and went to Gaius’ chambers. “Gaius, Merlin’s in jail.”
    “What for?” Gaius asked panicked.
    “It wasn’t for practicing magic, he just got tangled up with the king's son, Arthur.”
    “There’s not much I can do now, but maybe I can pull a few strings in the morning.”
    “Thank you Gaius.”
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    Meris. A voice rang through her head. Meris immediately aroused and glanced around her room in a futile attempt to find the source. Her vain search only ended when a knock on her door alerted her of someone on the other side.
    “It’s Gaius, are you decent?” The physician called out from outside.
    “Oh, um, yes it’s alright.” Gaius came into the room. “Yes?”
    “Come on, let’s get your brother.”
    Meris hurridly got herself dressed and followed Gaius out of his chambers and down flights of stairs to an area of the castle she had never been to before. It wasn’t long before Meris realized that they were headed to the dungeons, where they found Merlin laying on the ground in his cell. “Merlin!” Gaius called out to him. “you never cease to amaze me. The one thing that someone like you should do is keep your head down, and what do you do? You behave like an idiot.”
   “I’m sorry.” Merlin apologized.
    “You’re lucky, I’ve managed to pull a few strings to get you released.”
    Merlin became excited at the news. “Oh, thank you, thank you! I won’t forget this.”
    “Well, there is a small price to pay.” Meris added.
    The next thing Merlin knew, he was in the stocks with vegetables being hurled at him. Meris stood to the side along with Gaius holding back a chuckle. "Remind me again, why I'm here Meris." Merlin asked his sister.
    "Well, someone decided they needed to draw attention to themself." Meris recalled.
    "And how did that land me here?"
    "Play foolish, games-"
    "Win foolish prizes." Merlin finished as a tomato hit him square in the face.
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    "Do you want some vegetables with that?" Gaius asked Merlin as he sat down for lunch, earning a small laugh from Merlin and a brief smile from Meris as she sat down.
    "I know you're still angry with me." Merlin told Gaius.
    "Your mother asked me to look after you both."
    "Yes." Merlin played with his food a bit.
    "What did your mother say to you both about your gifts?" Gaius questioned them.
    "That we were special." Merlin answered.
    "You are special, the likes of which I had never seen before."
    A puzzled look came across Meris' face. "What do you mean?"
    "Well, magic requires incantations, spells that take years to study. What I saw you do Merlin, was... elemental, instinctive."
    "Well, what's the point if it can't be used?" Merlin wondered.
    "That I do not know. You are a question that has never been posed before Merlin."
    "Did you ever study magic?" Meris asked Gaius.
    "Uther banned all such work twenty years ago." Gaius answered.
    "Why?" Merlin inquired.
    “People used magic for the wring end at the time. It threw the natural order of the world into chaos. Uther made it his life’s mission to destroy everything from back then, even the dragons.”
    “What, all of them?”
    “There was one dragon he choose not to kill, kept it as an example. He imprisoned it in a cave deep beneath the castle, where no one can free it. Now, eat up, the both of you, and when you’re finished I need you to take a concoction to Lady Helen. She needs it for her voice.”
    “Wait, both of us?” Merlin asked. “Why?”
    “Well, considering where you were just a few hours ago,” Meris spoke, “I’d say you need someone to keep you out of trouble.”
    “Fair enough.” Merlin pouted as he finished his food.
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    “I think her room is right over there.” Meris told Merlin as the twins made their way throughout the vast halls of the castle. Once there, Meris knocked on the door. “Lady Helen?” When they were met with silence, they went inside and Merlin set the concoction on Lady Helen’s vanity.
    “Meris, look at this.” Merlin had picked up an object on the vanity.
    “Merlin,” Meris scolded him as she snatched the object from him, “you shouldn’t be going through someone else’s things, least of all a royal guest’s. Do you wish to end up back in the cells?” Meris had finally noticed what was in her hand and looked at it curiously; it was a straw figure tied together with strings, and looking at the mirror, Meris noticed it was mostly covered by a sheet. Holding the straw figure gave Meris a bad feeling, so she put it back as she saw Merlin examining a book bound by string.
    Before she could reprimand him again, they heard a noise and Merlin hurriedly put the items back in their place. Just as he put them back, Meris turned to see Lady Helen herself. The two had never seen Lady Helen before, but her talented voice was the talk of many kingdoms.
    A moment of silence passed as Lady Helen glanced between Meris, Merlin, and her vanity. "What are you doing in here?"
    "Uh-uhm," Merlin stuttered. "We were asked to deliver this." Merlin got the vial containing the concoction and handed it to Lady Helen. While he did, Meris noticed Helen's behavior, it seemed odd. Once he handed the vial to Helen, the twins left, not being able to shake an uneasy feeling.
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    The two went through the town on more errands for Gaius when they walked pass a group being led by a blonde male partially dressed in armor. "How's your knee-walking moving along?" Merlin tried to ignore him at first but the blonde persisted. "Oh, don't run away!"
    Merlin stopped. "From you?"
    "Aw thank God, I thought you were deaf as well as dumb."
    "Look, I told you you're an ass," Merlin said as he turned to face the blonde that Meris had recognized as Prince Arthur, "I just didn't realize you were a royal one. Oh, what are you going to do, you got your daddy's men to protect you?"
    The prince laughed. "I could take you apart with one blow."
    "I could take you apart with less than that."
    "Are you sure?"
    Merlin stared at them for a long moment before removing his jacket, much to the prince's amusement and to Meris' worry. Meris grabbed Merlin's arm in a feeble attempt to de-escalate the situation. "Merlin, it's not worth it."
    Merlin didn’t listen as Arthur took a flail from one of his men and tossed it to Merlin, who failed to catch it, being so unused to the weapon.
    "Come on then." Arthur told Merlin as he swung his flail above his head. "I warn you, I've been trained to kill since birth."
    "Wow," Merlin replied sarcastically, "and how long have you been training to be a prat?"
    Arthur scoffed. "You can't address me like that."
    "Sorry, how long have you been training to be a prat," Merlin mockingly bowed, "my lord?"
    Arthur responded by taking a swing at Merlin, and Meris ran off to find Gaius, who she hoped to de-escalate the situation before someone, mainly Merlin got hurt. She got to Gaius' chambers to find him looking at the window. "Gaius!"
    "Don't tell me." Gaius started.
    "Merlin's got into a fight with the prince."
    The two went back where Merlin and Arthur were to find Merlin standing over Arthur in victory. The victory didn't last king since Arthur got his hands on a broom and knocked Merlin to the ground with it. As the guards began to seize Merlin, Arthur stopped them. "No, let him go. He may be an idiot, but he's a brave one." He stopped and looked at Merlin. "There's something about you. I can't quite put my finger on it."
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    "How could you be so foolish?!" Gaius asked Merlin angrily as the trio entered his chambers.
    "He needed to be taught a lesson." Merlin answered.
    "Magic must be studied, mastered, and used for good, not for idiotic pranks!"
    Merlin turned to Gaius. "What is there to master? I could move objects like that before I could talk!"
    "Then by now, you should know how to control yourself!"
    "I don't want to! If I can't use magic then what have I got? I'm just a nobody, and I always will be.  If I can't use magic, I might as well die."
    Merlin went into his room, as Gaius began to gather his medicinal supplies. Meris stood, shaken by Merlin's words. Merlin had never said anything like that before, even back home, though she knew that he always felt different than the rest for obvious reasons.
    Gaius began to head to Merlin's room, but Meris stopped him. "Just tell me what I need to do, I'll go talk to him." As Gaius gathered the supplies she would need, Meris asked, “You don’t know why he has magic, do you Gaius?”
    “Truthfully, no, but maybe there is someone with greater knowledge than me.” Gaius gave her the tonics she needed, and Meris went into her brother's room to find him chest-down on his bed.
    "Come on, get up and take your shirt off."
    Merlin did as Meris set the medicines on his nightstand and sat beside him. As she got the tonic for the wounds on Merlin’s back, Merlin asked, “Gaius doesn’t know why we were born like this, does he?”
    “No, but I’m sure that there is a good reason why you have magic.”
    “I’m not a monster, am I?”
    Meris lightly hit Merlin. “Am I a monster?” Merlin shook his head. “Then you’re not either.”
    “But I wish I knew why I have magic.” Merlin told Meris as she poured a liquid into a cup.
    “Gaius mentioned that there might be someone with greater knowledge than him.” Meris said as she handed the tonic to her brother. "Drink this, Gaius said it will help with the pain." After he drank the liquid, Merlin handed the small cup back and Meris stood to leave, ruffling Merlin's hair as she did.
    "Meris?"
    "Hm?" Meris stopped at the door.
    "Thank you."
    Meris softly smiled. "Just try not to get yourself into any more trouble, alright?"
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    Meris. Meris. The young lady shifted in her sleep as the voice called to her. Only when she saw flashes of a chandelier falling and dagger being thrown did she startle awake. She got out of bed, put on her cloak over her underdress and boots, and crept out into Gaius' room.
    To her surprise, she found Merlin in there, looking as surprised as she was when he realized she was awake. They made gestures to each other as if having a silent conversation with each other until Merlin accidentally knocked a metal object over, causing them to flinch in fear of waking Gaius. His only response was shifting over away from the two. Merlin gestured for Meris to come to him, and before the two left, Merlin used his magic to cover Gaius with his sheet. Once they left the room, quietly shutting the door, they finally spoke in whispers.
    "What the hell are you doing up?" Merlin whispered to his sister.
    "I couldn't sleep, what the hell are you doing up?" She whispered back
    "I kept hearing a voice in my head."
    "You're hearing one too?"
    "Come on, let's go find out what it is."
    The twins made their way throughout the castle. They were careful to not alert the guard on patrol. As the two walked across the courtyard, they heard the voice calling their names again.
    The voice called them to the dungeons where they halted due to a pair of guards keeping watch over the entrance. Merlin looked to see they were playing with some die, so he used his magic to move the die away from the guards until they were out of the room entirely. Before heading into the entrance, Merlin grabbed a torch and lit it before the two descended down a flight of stairs behind an open metal door, the voice calling to them as they did.
    Before they knew it, the twins found themselves in a large cavern, lit only by the moon from outside and the torch in Merlin's hand. A moment later they heard a chuckle echo throughout the cave.
    "Where are you?" Merlin called out into the cavity.
    Out of the darkness, a large, scaly, figure flew onto a rock where the twins could see it. The two stared in wonder at the great beast. The only word that could come to mind as far as describing it was, dragon.
    "I'm here." The dragon said as he and the twins studied each other, having never seen anything, or anyone, like them before. "How small you are, for such great destinies."
    Merlin and Meris glanced at each other for a moment before turning back to the dragon. "Why, what do you mean?" Merlin asked him.
    "What destinies?" Meris inquired.
    "Your gifts, Merlin, and Meris," The dragon answered, "were given to you both for a reason."
    "So there is a reason?" Merlin sounded hopeful.
    "Arthur is the Once and Future King who will unite the land of Albion."
    "Right."
    "But he faces many threats from friend and foe alike."
    "I don't see what this has to do with me."
    "Everything." The dragon told the two of them. "Without you, Arthur will never succeed. Without you, there will be no Albion."
    "No, no you've got this wrong." Merlin told the dragon.
    "There is no right or wrong, only what is and what isn't."
    "I'm serious, if anyone wants to go and kill him, they can go ahead. In fact, I'll give them a hand."
    "Merlin!" Meris scolded him. "You can't mean that."
    The dragon simply chuckled. "None of us can choose our destiny, and none of us can escape it."
    "No, there must be another Arthur, because this one's an idiot." Merlin spoke.
    "Perhaps it's your destiny to change that."
    "You've got this all wrong." Meris told the dragon. "I don't have a gift. I can't make things move with my mind. I'm completely ordinary."
    "No one person can bear such a great destiny alone. That is why you have strengths to help Merlin fulfill his destiny, and why he has strengths that will help you fulfill yours." The dragon flew away, despite the two begging for more knowledge about their so-called 'destinies'.
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    The next morning, Meris woke with a start to the same images she saw the night before. After she recovered from the nightmares, she got dressed and went out into Gaius' chambers to find him preparing a drought. "What's that for?" Meris asked curiously.
    "This is for the Lady Morgana," Gaius explained, "the poor girl is suffering from nightmares. Will you wake your brother so he can deliver this to Morgana?"
    Meris walked over to her brother's room and knocked on the door. "Merlin, are you awake?" A faint,'Hmm' was the only answer she got, so she went inside to find the room in a chaotic state. “What is this? We haven’t been here a week and your room is already a mess!”
    Merlin held his hands up in a, ‘I don’t know’ manner. “It just happens.”
    “By magic?” Meris sarcastically guessed.
    “Yeah.”
    “Right, and now I’m sure you can clean it up. Without magic.” Meris tossed a pair of trousers at Merlin’s face. “After that Gaius needs you to deliver a tonic to the Lady Morgana.”
    After she made sure that Merlin was getting himself out of bed, she went from Merlin’s room back to Gaius. “Ah, Meris, I need some herbs.”
    “Of course, what are they?”
    “Henbane, wormwood, and sorrel. Here,” Gaius handed Meris a small book for classifying plants, “to help you find them. The plants shouldn’t be too far from Camelot.”
    “Thank you Gaius.” Meris grabbed her basket and cloak, then headed off.
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    Once she finished gathering herbs, Meris returned to the castle with just enough time to wash up for the celebration. Once they were all ready, Merlin, Meris, and Gaius entered the hall where the celebration was being held. The twins looked about the hall in wonder, which made sense since the two had never been exposed to such wonderful architecture before.
    Meris caught Merlin glaring at Arthur and his comrades laughing and joking, more than likely about the quarrel that happened the day before. Meris rubbed Merlin's shoulder in comfort. "Put them out of your mind Merlin. They're just bullies, nothing more."
    Then, Lady Morgana walked in with a stunning red dress, leaving the majority of the room speechless, including Merlin. Gaius caught Merlin gazing at the Lady Morgana. "Merlin," he whispered, lightly scolding him, "remember, you're here to work." Gaius went to mingle with the others as a young brunette came up to Merlin and Meris.
    "She looks beautiful doesn't she?" The young brunette asked.
    "Yeah." Merlin answered dreamily.
    "Some people are just born to be queen."
    "No," Merlin said in disbelief.
    "I hope so, one day. Not that I'd want to be her. Who'd wanna marry Arthur?" The young lady noticed Meris beside Merlin. "Who's this?"
    "I'm Meris." Meris introduced herself, sticking her hand out to shake. "Merin's sister."
    "Nice to meet you, I'm Gwenivere, but most people call me 'Gwen'." Gwen accepted Meris' handshake.
    Suddenly, the king arrived with the flourish of trumpets, and everyone bowed as he made his way to the table where he stood as he gave a speech. "We have enjoyed twenty years of peace and prosperity. It has brought the kingdom and myself many pleasures. But few can compare with the honor of introducing Lady Helen of Mora." The king sat with his son and ward as the entire room gave a round of applause to Lady Helen, who began singing.
    As her song echoed throughout the room, the twins realized that everyone had begun to sleep, and covered their ears as the flames in the rooms died out and cobwebs began to cover every nook and cranny of the place. As this was happening, the 'Lady Helen' moved closer to Prince Arthur and pulled a dagger from her sleeve. Thinking fast, Merlin caused the chandelier above Helen to fall onto her, pinning her to the floor and causing the spell to wear off.
    Everyone stirred from their short sleep to find the Lady Helen pinned to the floor from the chandelier, only, it wasn't the Lady Helen. Meris looked to see it was the elderly woman from the first day she and Merlin arrived in Camelot. Everything made sense, the elderly woman had sworn vengeance to the king for killing her son, so she impersonated Lady Helen to kill Prince Arthur. Thankfully, now she seemed unable to do any more harm...
    ... or so everyone thought. The elderly woman used the last of her strength to throw the dagger she had where Arthur stood. As quickly as they could, the twins pulled Arthur out of the way of the dagger. Luckily, the twins acted in time and the only thing the dagger harmed was Arthur's chair. Her strength spent and her life gone, the elder woman took a final breath as she slumped onto the ground, dead.
    The twins and the prince stood, taking in what had just happened. The king was the first to speak. 'You saved my boy's life. A debt must be repaid."
    "Ah, well, I." Merlin stuttered.
    "It's nothing, sire, any good citizen of Camelot would have done the same." Meris assured the king.
    "Don't be so modest. You shall be rewarded." The king told them.
    "No, honestly, you don't have to your highness." Merlin replied.
    "No absolutely, this merits something quite special."
    "Well..."
    "You shall be awarded with a position in the royal household, you shall be prince Arthur's manservant." He noticed Meris. "What about you?"
    "Sire, there is no need-"
    Gaius came up to the small group. "Sire, if I may, I have been needing some help as of late, and the girl has shown promising talent in the field of science."
    "Then you shall be awarded as Gaius's assistant." The king walked away as the room burst into thunderous applause.
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    "So," Meris found her brother staring into the lit candle in his room, "how does it feel to be a hero?"
    Merlin snapped out of his trance. "I suppose I could ask you the same question."
    The two turned when the sound of knocking grabbed their attention as Gaius came into the room. "Seems you two are heroes."
    "Hard to believe, isn't it?"
    "No, I knew it from the moment I met you two."
    The twins shared a glance, remembering how they met their new guardian just a few days ago. A moment later Meris realized, "but that was Merlin's magic."
    "And now it seems we've finally found a use for it." Gaius told them.
    "What do you mean?" Merlin asked.
    "I saw how you saved Arthur's life." Merlin tried to protest, but Meris gave him a silencing look. "Perhaps that is its purpose."
    Melin sighed. "My destiny."
   "Indeed." Gaius handed Merlin an object wrapped in cloth. "This book was given to me when I was your age, but I have a feeling it will be of more use to you than it was to me."
    Hesitant at first, Merlin opened the cloth-bound object to find it was a book held closed by two clasps. Opening the clasps, he flipped through the book and found the contents to be interesting. "But this is a book of magic."
    "Which is why you must keep it hidden."
    Merlin turned to Meris. "What about you?"
    "Merlin, I've never shown any sign of being able to use magic." Meris told her brother. "The book is of no use to me."
    A knock at Gaius' door drew the trio's attention away from the book. "Merlin? Prince Arthur wants you right away." A servant called out.
    Gaius turned back to Merlin. "Your destiny is calling. You'd better find out what he wants."
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itsybitsybiderman · 3 years
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running from fate+fate finding you anyways ft.Merwaine
Saw this post and had ideas but ran out of tag space
S1, Killy speaks to Merlin he Nopes out of there.
Merlin walking right back to Ealdor.
 But you can't fight fate, and on his way he runs into a rogue wanderer with gorgeous hair and a bright laugh.
 Gwaine accompanies him back to Ealdor.
 They fought bandits with magic swords on the way, and Gwaine mentioned sorcery in a negative tone. 
Merlin wilted but Gwaine didn't notice, he was too busy trying to impress merlin with the sword flip thing he does, accompanied with his hair flip. 
When merlin arrives in Ealdor, Will is thrilled and so is Hunith but also Hunith is concerned bc what?? happened???
Merlin explains everything to Hunith as Will gives Gwaine the shovel talk.
 When Gwaine eventually packs up to leave after an incident involving a goose, a felled apple tree, and a pair of underpants (an incident that gets him kicked out by the village leader) he returns in s3e4 fashion to help the fight against cenred's men
Merlin thinks travelling with Gwaine and helping people doesn't seem like a bad idea
Hunith sees the decision in Merlin's face before Merlin himself does.
Will pulls his soulmate since childhood down and rubs his knuckles in his hair while Hunith silently packs some bread and cheese, a single tear falling because her boy is leaving yes, but he’s also in love and isn’t that wonderful? 
Merlin asks Will to come but Will says he has duties as 'prince william of ealdor' but he softens and says eventually. when the time is right
in their travels they run into a handsome but sad swordsman, a man who could never be a knight of camelot for he wasn't nobility. 
merlin gasps and gwaine sighs. they were always ready to fuck with the elite anyways
the identity theft thing happens except lance doesn’t get caught ‘cause. its not like anyone KNOWS who gwaine is
on their way to camelot gwaine promises to fight arthur and merlin mournfully says as a knight of camelot lance would have to defend arthur and merlin cant fight his FRIENDS.
they are having this conversation when they are attacked by a griffin.
they barely make it to camelot, and it is while merlin is being treated by gaius for the cut he got, all while valiantly ignoring killy's calls, gaius presses a book in his hands- the enchanted lance happens, lance knows, and Lance accepts him.
 when Merwaine leave there is a steady flow of correspondence between merlin/gaius and merlin/lance
this is how merlin knows when the dragon escapes (killy switched tactics and spoke to morgana) and gaius writes to merlin and says ‘hey ur dad is alive lol’ 
merwaine finding balinor who dies and merlin cries and gwaine realizes oh. this was his father. and theres pain cause he realizes merlin never told him because gwaine was never quiet about being anti-magic
on their way back to camelot they run into a badass blacksmith 
turns out he’s going to camelot too, his sister and father are under seige by a dragon after all. 
when merlin defeats the dragon, the knights were knocked out and so everyone thinks Elyan is the dragonlord
gwen rolls her eyes fondly as arthur asks her if she’s a dragon lady. 
just. merlin running from fate. and fate finding him anyways
I firmly believe the only reason Merlin didn’t turn around and walk away when that is such a Merlin thing to do was plot purposes. Had Merlin left Arthur would have been dead a hundred times over
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Long Lost Prince Part 2;
Merlin leads his people home and Arthur grapples with whether he should keep his feelings to himself or not.
Part 1
Just like Arthur promised, a portion of Camelot's army mixed with around fifty of Merlin's knights are marching towards the Dragonlands within a month.
Merlin and Arthur lead the way, Sir Thornway, Sir Leon, and Sir Mordred following closely behind. It was decided fairly quickly that Hunith and Gaius would stay in Camelot; they were desperate to get home, but they weren't fighters, and whilst the chance of attack was fairly low considering the army behind them and the two dragons circling ahead, Arthur and Merlin were unwilling to risk it.
At a quick pace, Arthur reckons they could've made the journey in a week, but the army is slow-moving, and it takes them almost three to reach the border. They don't hear a peep out of anyone as they move through the countryside, though Arthur does raise an amused eyebrow at Merlin every once in a while, as and when the Warlock chuckles at Kilgharrah whispering in his head about all the various pathetic mercenaries and bandits running away screaming at the sight of his silhouette against the clouds.
The Dragonland, in comparison to Camelot, was a very small kingdom, but it’s capital city was near the far border, backed by miles and miles of towering mountains. In one of the many sessions of reminiscing that Merlin, Thornway, and Kilgharrah have in the evenings, they discuss the mountains at length. They were mostly uninhabited by people, even before the purge, they were far too treacherous for those without a guide and strong magic, and even then the paths were still dangerous.
The great mountains were where the Dragon’s resided; in a network of twisting tunnels and great caverns carved with fire and magic. Merlin vaguely remembers being taken there a few weeks before... before they left. Thornway told him that retreating into the mountains was one of the back up plans, if Uther’s army was too big and there was no hope of escape through the countryside.
(Arthur frowned at that. He was frowning at a lot nowadays, but Merlin just squeezed his leg under the blanket they were sharing (Leon did NOT smirk and Arthur did NOT blush) and whispered, yet again, that he was not his father.)
The escape through the mountains was planned to be a last ditch effort though, even with the dragons leading them and their strongest sorcerers protecting them, the perilous paths, with their knife edge drops and loose rocks and harsh snow, would have taken too many casualties to count. Though, in the end, escaping through the countryside had been just as deadly.
Arthur also used the journey to think about what Leon had said. Though Merlin and The King stuck close by for the whole trek, conversation was sparse (though the silences were comfortable); Arthur was unsure how to bring up the inevitable change in their relationship, though he knows that, for his own peace of mind if nothing else, he should.
They were deep into the Kingdom, having passed all the now doubly abandoned outer villages (Arthur was right in thinking that two dragons and a marching army scared away all the various mercenary groups and bandits) and now only a day’s ride from the capital, that Arthur asked Merlin the question that had been plaguing his mind for weeks. The two of them were sat against a fallen log, the night flourishing around them. The silence over the rest of the camp was tense, the knowledge that they were close hanging in the air, but the silence between Merlin and Arthur was comfortable, peaceful:
“What are you planning on doing?”
Merlin took a noticeably deep breath and Arthur turned to him, trying desperately to keep the worried frown off his face:
“I don’t know. I didn’t really discuss it with ma, we just... wanted to get home, and work from there, see what happens I guess.”
Arthur nodded, gulping slightly before he responds:
“Do you think she wants the throne? Your mother? Or will you become King?”
Merlin chuckles, but Arthur clenches his hands and looks away at the humourless lilt the noise has:
“I’d love to see her back in her crown, on her throne, but it’s been a long time. She did everything with my father by her side, I don’t know if... if she would want to do it on her own. I don’t know that she would cope.-”
The Warlock turns to face Arthur, and it strikes The King how close they are when he can feel Merlin’s breath on his cheek. He turns to meet his gaze once more:
“-What would you do, Arthur? In my place?”
Arthur can only hold his stare for a few moments before he looks to his lap, shaking his head slightly:
“I don’t know, Merlin. Tell me what’s on your mind, I... I can’t promise that I’ll have the answers, but maybe saying things out-loud will help.”
Merlin nods as he shuffles in his spot slightly, and Arthur likes to think that he was moving closer:
“I... I’m desperate to get home. But at the same time, I waited. I waited for twenty years, I’ve built myself a life in Camelot, I’d... given up on ever returning home, and I was just about coming to terms with the fact that Camelot was my home now. And then... this. I have to lead my people back, I know that, I owe it to them, it’s my job to protect them and give them back their heritage-”
Arthur interrupts quietly:
“Your heritage.”
Merlin sighs:
“-yeah, my heritage. My mother, and Gaius, and my people, and... and I, we deserve to go home. But I was only six when we left, I never got all the lessons on how to be a Politician, a King. Yes, I’m the heir, yes, I remember home and the crown and being a little Prince, but I am not built to be a King, Arthur, I don’t want to- I can’t fail my people, but I fear I will. I... I’ve been putting up a brave front for my mum, for Thornway, but I’m terrified. I have no idea what I’m doing, Arthur. What if I mess up?”
Arthur allows a small smile to slip onto his face as he takes Merlin’s fidgeting hands in his own. He shakes his head as he huffs out a short laugh and Merlin looks at him incredulously:
“You couldn’t possibly, Merlin. I know you well, do I not?-”
Merlin nods his head vigorously:
“Better than anyone.”
Arthur fights the blush:
“-And I’m telling you, that you have nothing to worry about. You may not have had official lessons, but you have the mind for politics.-”
Arthur glances to his lap briefly as he takes a fortifying breath, stroking his thumbs over the back of Merlin’s hands, still clutched in his, and looking up to him again:
“-I had all those lessons. All that training, and practicing, and tutoring. But I was still so... lost when I became King. I don’t think I ever told you, Merlin, but the only thing that got me through was you, always by my side. Because I knew that you would never let me fail, because I trusted you to see my shortcomings and make up for them without fuss, without fault. And you did, without asking for any thanks, or recognition, like you do with everything. To this day, you think I’m a good King because of destiny, but that’s utter bollocks and I’ve always known it. I’m a good King, Merlin, because you made me a good man first. And on days when I doubt my own rule, I remind myself of how much faith you have in me, and it gives me strength, because I know you would never allow me to fail, and on the off chance I fall, I know you would catch me. Every good King who cares about his people has doubts, Merlin, but however much faith you have in me? I have the same amount, if not more, in you. You’ll do just fine.”
Merlin looks at him with wide, teary eyes, and Arthur flushes under the scrutiny. The King goes to say something, maybe a flippant joke to de-charge the atmosphere, but before he can utter even a word, Merlin throws himself at him, wrapping tight arms around his shoulders and burying his face in his neck. Arthur almost falls back, but he holds steady, chuckling slightly as he returns Merlin’s hug with equal intensity. Merlin’s muffled voice from his shoulder has Arthur tightening his grip:
“Will you catch me? If I fall?”
Arthur moves a hand up to cradle the back of Merlin’s head:
“You won’t fall. But I’d spend the rest of my life stood below you with my arms out ready, Merlin, if that gave you just a fraction of the belief in yourself that you should have.”
Neither pulled away for what felt like hours, and by the time Thornway wondered over to check on them, they had fallen asleep against the log, arms still firmly wrapped around each other.
He smiles mournfully as he drapes a blanket over them. You would have to be blind to miss the odd moroseness that had overtaken them both, and the old knight knew that his Prince was dreading having to leave Arthur, and that Arthur was dreading the same. They shuffle in their sleep, and Thornway freezes, worried that he had woken them, but when Arthur just mutters Merlin’s name and moves impossibly closer to the other man Thornway sighs. This is going to be... painful for the two of them, and he’s not quite sure how he can help.
~
After another day of travel, they find themselves moving through the capital city, towards the castle sitting at the foot of the mountains.
The army was left with orders to methodically clear the city whilst Arthur, Leon, Thornway, and Mordred headed straight for the citadel gates. Though the city had fallen into disrepair, the castle looked like it had barely been touched, even by the elements, and Thornway explained that powerful enchantments laid over the ancient building, preventing it from being invaded or damaged by even the strongest of armies:
“It was meant to be a stronghold, somewhere we could hide and keep our people safe in emergencies, but we knew if we did that we would have backed ourselves into a corner. Uther was taking over more and more of the city every day, if we locked ourselves in... we would have just starved. Trying to escape through the city and out into the wilderness was our only hope.”
Merlin nods absent-mindedly as he stares up at the main door:
“Can we even get in?”
His voice is quiet and shaky, and Mordred steps forward to put a hand on his shoulder as Thornway replies with a small smile:
“You’re the heir, the doors will always open for you, Little Falcon.”
Merlin replies with a weak smirk and flushed cheeks:
“You know, I’m not all that little anymore.”
Thornway barks out a laugh as he shakes his head slightly, ruffling Merlin’s hair as the younger man pouts:
“Well, you’ll always be littler than me.-”
Merlin goes to retort, but before he can, his knight steps back and gestures to the great doors in front of them:
“-Go on, it’s time for us to finally come home, I think.”
Merlin gulps and nods, and Mordred lets his hand fall back to his side as the older Warlock takes the steps two at a time, hesitating only slightly before he wraps his hand around one of the doors’ metal rings. It twists easily in his grip, and the door swings open. Merlin has to take a step back and cover his mouth with his sleeve as he coughs, the billowing clouds of dust being disturbed for the first time in two decades making it almost impossible to see into the dark hall.
It settles after a few moments and Merlin takes a deep breath, reaching behind him wordlessly and relaxing only when he feels Arthur take his hand. The blonde King gives his hand a comforting squeeze, and Merlin takes his first shaking steps across the threshold.
He walks through the dark corridors slowly, one hand tightly clenched in Arthur’s, the other trailing along the wall next to him. The rest of the group is silent as they follow him, and nothing can be heard bar their muffled steps over the dusty rugs, and the deep breathing of Merlin and Thornway.
Merlin seems to know where he’s going, so no one questions the corners he turns and the rooms he passes without second thought. The deeper into the castle they get, the darker it becomes, until finally Merlin stops, a long hall stretched out in front of him. His eyes flash gold and the torches lining the walls flare up, illuminating the corridor in golden light. Arthur turns to look at the Warlock beside him, empathetic tears gathering in his eyes as he sees tracks on Merlin’s cheeks. 
Merlin turns to glance at Thornway, whose in a similar state, before closing his eyes and flattening his free hand against the wall, digging his fingertips into the cracks as his voice comes out quiet and raspy:
“I know these halls, this stone.-”
Thornway takes a deep stuttering breath, muttering Merlin’s name. Merlin steps away from the wall, looking back to his knight with a weak, teary smile:
“-Do you remember? Chambers filled with golden light, vast halls bustling with people and dragons and magic?”
Thornway gulps and nods, slowly moving towards Merlin and putting a hand on his shoulder:
“I remember.-”
He nods down the corridor, taking a deep breath and clearing his throat before asking:
“-You remember what’s down there?”
Merlin smiles and nods, squeezing Arthur’s hand and leading the group down the hall, obviously impatient to get to wherever their destination is, but unwilling to walk any quicker.
Leon and Arthur share a confused and slightly concerned look but don’t say anything, allowing Merlin and Thornway to lead the way. Once again, Merlin hesitates only slightly before pushing the door at the end of the corridor open. and the six of them gather inside the immense chamber. Like the rest of the castle, it was dusty, but untouched; unlike the rest of the castle, it was bathed in colourful light. The walls were high, the ceiling obviously stretching far above the surrounding rooms, and the afternoon sun shone brightly through giant stained glass windows. 
Reds and blues and greens and every other colour imaginable were splashed across the stone floor, painting pictures of dragons and flowers and family, but everyone’s eyes skip over the colourful artwork, instead being drawn to the two golden thrones sat on a dais at the other end of the hall. Merlin lets go of Arthur’s hand, walking towards the thrones with wide eyes as the others stay back, watching with a mix of pride and grief. Thornway follows after a few moments and Leon has to put a hand on Arthur’s shoulder, shaking his head slightly when the King looks at him. Arthur clenches his hands and looks away, but stays by the door, wanting more than anything to be with Merlin through this but also understanding that it wasn’t his place.
Merlin finally reaches the thrones.
He wipes the thick dust from the armrests with shaking, but reverent hands before sitting down on the steps, slightly to the side of the golden seats. He runs his fingertips over the stone, remembering every bump and crack and texture, and Thornway stands behind him, in line with the thrones, putting a hand on his shoulder and muttering:
“Now this brings back memories.”
Merlin nods, looking up at him, tears no longer flowing, but still gathering in his eyes:
“I... I don’t remember much, but I still... know. I know this is where I sat, with you behind me, ma and dad next to me on their thrones. I remember dad promising that when I was older, they’d have a throne made for me, so I could sit with them.”
Thornway nods, slowly moving to sit beside him, ignoring the creaking in his bones as he lets his weight fall onto the stone steps:
“Hmm. foreign royalty and dignitaries thought it odd that the King and Queen let you sit in on meetings, even as a young child, but they were always adamant; they didn’t want to hide you away. You were always safe, of course, but they wanted you exposed to the people and the people exposed to you. I suppose they wanted to nurture a natural love and protectiveness of your people in you; how could they expect you to serve the Kingdom well if you were only doing so out of duty, and not genuine love?”
Merlin hums thoughtfully before smiling briefly up at Arthur, still stood on the other side of the room. When Arthur tentatively returns the smile, despite not hearing the hushed conversation, Merlin looks to Thornway next to him, bumping shoulders with a short giggle:
“Probably why I’ve always been so disrespectful to Arthur, everyone in here was equal, no matter what. I guess that’s why the treatment of servants and commoners was such a shock when I moved to Camelot, I don’t really remember much of home, but it definitely felt different.”
Thornway nods as Merlin stands, holding out a hand to the knight and pulling him to his feet. Merlin’s gaze moves around the room, though he stays rooted to the spot, and Thornway asks his question quietly:
“What do you want to do? Do you want to finish clearing the castle and the city first, or fetch your mother and uncle first?”
Merlin gulps before taking a deep breath, staring at the floor and saying in a small voice:
“I don’t know... what do you think I should do?”
Thornway chuckles and shakes his head:
“This is your decision, Little Falcon. You are the Crown Prince, this is your Kingdom, your city, your people, trust your instincts. What should be done?”
Merlin looks to Arthur once again, reminding himself of the King’s promise to catch him should he fall, before looking back at Thornway with a determined expression:
“Send Kilgharrah to fetch ma and Gaius. We no longer need him as a deterrent, and we’ll still have Aithusa. He can make the journey to Camelot and back in a week at most, knights, even on horseback, will take at least twice that. It’s been a while since either of them went flying, but they’ll remember soon enough, and I trust Kilgharrah to keep them safe. We can keep clearing the city and start rough plans for rebuilding whilst we wait.”
Thornway grins and nods proudly:
“Exactly what I would have suggested. See? You’ll be just fine.-”
Merlin returns his grin shyly, blushing slightly as he rubs the back of his neck. Thornway rolls his eyes good-naturedly before gesturing to the others:
“-Come, My Lord, we should let the others know and head out to send Kilgharrah off as soon as possible.”
Merlin pushes the older knight’s shoulder playfully at the use of a title, but Thornway just smirks and waves Merlin ahead of him.
~
Arthur, Leon, and Mordred were told of the plan as the group made their way out of the castle again, having to cover their eyes when they step into the bright sunlight. They all smiled fondly as they saw Merlin’s growing confidence, though Arthur had to stamp down the growing anxiety swirling in his stomach; he refused to be sad for himself.
Kilgharrah was flying back towards Camelot within the hour, and Merlin was separating the army into groups and assigning tasks with a strong voice and straight back, taking every question and suggestion in his stride and organising hundreds of people without issue.
Arthur knew that there was still a conversation to be had between himself and Merlin, though with every day that passed he questioned whether it was the right thing to do. He wasn’t oblivious enough not to notice the way Merlin always asked for his council, even when he didn’t need it, always searched for his eyes in the crowd when he addressed his people, but that didn’t mean that his... affections, were returned.
Everyone, even Thornway now, kept shooting him pitying looks, and he figured out fairly quickly that he wasn’t as subtle as he’d like to believe. Leon was the only one he could rely on to convincingly pretend nothing was wrong, and Arthur used that to back up his deliberate ignoring of his stupid emotions.
Six days had passed and the clearing of debris from the lower town was well on its way when Kilgharrah landed in the castle courtyard, his two passengers tense and teary. Only Hunith, Gaius, Merlin, and Thornway took the journey through the castle this time; the others continued to help with the work in the town, not quite feeling that they would be welcome on the emotional tour.
Hunith decided fairly quickly that she would move on to become Queen Mother. Merlin would be crowned King (though he put his foot down and insisted that it wouldn’t happen until everything was properly sorted, and the people were settled back in the city), and though Hunith would still be the most senior of the royals, Merlin would technically have the most power. 
Arthur had mixed feelings about that. 
As King, Merlin would be a lot busier, would have a lot more responsibilities, but equally, he would have much more control over the use of his time; somehow making it both harder and easier to organise visits between the two of them. Though Arthur, of course, didn’t mention such feelings, just pulled Merlin into another tight hug and congratulated him with a grin.
With the help of Merlin and Mordred’s magic, and the few sorcerers scattered throughout the army they had brought, clearing the town of debris and rebuilding what they could with whatever was left went fairly quickly. Soon enough, the blacksmith’s and an infirmary were up and running, and the farms were ready for work to commence, just as soon as the resources from Camelot arrived.
The castle, whilst it had been fully explored by Merlin, Hunith, Thornway, and Gaius, had yet to be opened up to others or cleaned properly, but no one mentioned it. The gang slept happily in homes rebuilt in the upper town, and accepted Merlin’s excuse of wanting to focus on the people’s infrastructure first.
It was a week or so after Hunith and Gaius had arrived, Kilgharrah and Aithusa had disappeared into the mountains with Merlin’s approval, and Arthur once again found Merlin stood in the otherwise empty, still dusty throne room, staring at the golden seats with his hands in his pockets and his face tense.
Years ago, Arthur would’ve been wrong in his assumption that Merlin hadn’t heard him approach, but just this once he knows that he’s right. Arthur had slowly become an expert on picking up Merlin’s ticks, and even in the low light of the evening the blonde could tell that Merlin had no clue he was there.
Arthur didn’t want to feel like he was intruding, so cleared his throat quietly, only walking closer to the other man when his head whipped around, smiling slightly when he saw it was just Arthur.
Arthur stepped up next to him, and they both stared at the thrones in silence, shoulders brushing ever so slightly. Everything had been so busy in recent weeks that, other than the conversation two weeks earlier, Arthur and Merlin had spent barely any time together, just the two of them; every other time Arthur had found Merlin alone in the throne room he had shut the door quietly behind him and left, too afraid to intrude, not quite ready to start a conversation. The conversation.
After a few minutes, he clears his throat again and speaks in a quiet voice, not looking to the Warlock next to him:
“What’s on your mind?”
Merlin responds almost immediately, but like Arthur, he speaks quietly and doesn’t move his gaze from the thrones:
“Nothing, everything. I’m... doing ok, I think.-”
Arthur nods with a small smile, but Merlin continues before he can say anything:
“-But I’m scared that I’m only doing well because you’re here. You have to go back to Camelot eventually and... it sounds stupid, but I... I don’t want you to go. I need you, Arthur.”
Arthur gulps, finally looking to Merlin’s sorrowful face, though the other man refuses to meet his gaze. He takes his hands out of his pockets, fiddling with them roughly, rubbing his knuckles together and scratching his palms harshly. Arthur clenches his jaw, taking one of Merlin’s hands in his own gently and running soothing fingers over the younger man’s callouses:
“I know what you mean.-”
Merlin looks to him in surprise, his eyes widening, and Arthur continues with a small smile:
“-I told you, Merlin, I’m only a good King because of you. I’ve never had to rule on my own before and I’m dreading going back to Camelot without you.-”
Merlin shakes his head roughly, but Arthur continues once again, before he can disagree:
“-No, Merlin, don’t argue, it’s true. I... I need you as well, I don’t want to be without you, and I’ve no clue how I’m going to cope with a week’s ride between us. Leon tried talking some sense into me back in Camelot, and I know he was right, that all relationships take effort and we’ll have to work incredibly hard to stay in each other’s lives in any significant capacity, and I’m absolutely willing to do anything to keep you close, if not physically then... otherwise, but I’m still...-”
Arthur sighs and looks away, his cheeks just a little bit pink as he continues quietly:
“-I’m still scared to be without you.”
Merlin gulps and squeezes Arthur’s hand in his own, waiting for the blonde to finally look up at him again. The Warlock smiles at the eye contact and Arthur returns it weakly as Merlin finally replies:
“The last ten years of my life have revolved around you, completely and utterly, and I know it’s selfish of me to... not want that to change. I know I’m staying here, with my people, as their King. I would never consider abandoning them, not really, but I desperately want to, just so I can stay with you. We... we’ll figure something out, find some way to communicate quickly. I’m magic incarnate, there has to be a way, I... I’ll make a way, if I have to.”
The tears in Arthur’s eyes finally overflow at Merlin’s determined tone, but before the other man can say anything about it, Arthur pulls him into a tight hug, clutching his cloak in shaking fingers and burying his face in his shoulder, for once feeling grateful for the extra inch in height that Merlin has on him. Merlin returns the hug without hesitation, closing his eyes against the tears, though not managing to stop them from falling as he quietly speaks, his voice thick:
“I promised that I would stay with you until the day I died, but I... I have to leave, I... I can’t-”
Arthur tightens the hug as he interrupts him:
“No, Merlin, you owe me nothing, you don’t have to explain. You’ve already given me my kingdom, now it’s my chance to return the favour. I would never ever ask you to leave this behind just for me.”
Arthur can feel Merlin’s body shaking with silent sobs, and he runs a hand through his hair softly, breathing deeply in an effort to hold in his own bawling. 
They stand wrapped in each other for a while, neither willing to let go even when their tears dry up and their breathing evens out. Eventually Merlin rasps out a whispered:
“I don’t want to lose you.”
Arthur pulls back at long last, but doesn’t go far, leaning his forehead against Merlin’s and closing his eyes before replying:
“You won’t. We’ll take turns hosting Yule celebrations, and I can visit on your birthday, and there’ll be tournaments of course, and trade routes, and shared patrols near the border. I refuse to let you slip from my grasp, Merlin, you’ll never be without me, not for long anyway.”
Merlin huffs out a gentle laugh, and Arthur thinks the flutter of his breath over his cheeks and through his eyelashes is the most beautiful thing he’s ever felt. Both of them open their eyes, but they don’t move away from each other, even as they stare, becoming increasingly aware of the very little amount of space between them. Arthur’s brows crease slightly but he ignores the concerned question in Merlin’s eyes, instead lifting a hand to gently cup his jaw, gulping as Merlin’s expression falls into a soft smile.
The King takes a deep breath as he summons his courage, eyes filling with tears again as he clears his throat, whispering so quietly that it’s a miracle Merlin hears him, even with only inches between them:
“Merlin, I... you mean a great deal to... I mean I... -”
He cuts himself off with a quiet huff, and Merlin smirks at the slight blush dusting his cheeks, patiently waiting for him to continue. Arthur shuts his eyes tightly, taking another deep breath before opening them with a newfound determination. He meant it, he’d come this far, he was not going to let Merlin slip away:
“I love you, you are the single most important person in my life, and I would go to the ends of this world just to see you smile. I owe you my life, and so much more than that; you’ve been making promises and swearing oaths to my crown for years-”
Merlin interrupts him quietly:
“To you, to Arthur, not the crown, to you.”
Arthur huffs slightly and rolls his eyes:
“I’m trying to confess my undying love here Merlin, and I’m not very good with this whole... expressing shit, so shut up and let me finish.-”
Merlin snorts but stays otherwise silent, raising an eyebrow to prompt Arthur to continue:
“-Like I was saying. You’ve been swearing things for years, and now it’s my turn.-”
Arthur steps back, taking Merlin’s hands tightly in his own as he lowers himself to one knee, pressing his forehead to the Warlock’s knuckles:
“-I swear on my crown and in the name of Camelot, that I will always love you, that I will always be ready catch you, and that I will never stop putting the work in to make sure I don’t lose you, that you don’t lose me.”
The blonde can hear Merlin’s stuttered breathe and barely has time to process Merlin’s whispered-
“I accept your oath.”
-before he’s being pulled to his feet and urgently kissed.
One of Merlin’s hands settles on the side of Arthur’s neck and the other grips his hip. Arthur’s arms flail for only a moment in his shock before he moves to clutch Merlin’s collar tightly, closing his eyes and kissing back, pushing as much of his devotion into the action as possible and wanting nothing more than to sooth the stress-induced bite marks on Merlin’s lips.
They pull back far too soon, as far as both of them are concerned, once again resting their foreheads against each other as they catch their breath. Arthur’s face slowly morphs into a grin as he says:
“And to think I was stressing over whether I should tell you for weeks.”
Merlin rolls his eyes in response, snorting in amusement as he admits, much to Arthur’s chagrin:
“Believe me, I already knew, you weren’t very subtle. You’ve been sulking.”
Arthur lets out an incredulous huff and pulls back, still holding Merlin’s collar but staring at Merlin’s amused raised eyebrow with wide eyes:
“I am a King, Merlin, I do not sulk.”
Merlin chuckles:
“Well so am I, and yes you do.”
Arthur narrows his eyes slightly:
“Not yet you’re not. That’s besides the point, if you knew... why didn’t you say anything?”
Merlin’ face falls slightly, and if Arthur had to guess, he’d say that Merlin looked a little guilty. The blonde furrowed his brows but pulls his Warlock close again, stroking his jaw softly with his thumb as he waits for an answer:
“I... I love you, Arthur, more than anything, but... I wanted see if you would do anything about it. I knew I would do anything for you, but I needed... I needed to know if you thought I was worth the distance, the effort. If I said something first, I never would have known... I would always be second guessing if you were about to... to break it off, because you didn’t want to put in the frankly ridiculous amount of effort it’s going to take to keep things... good.”
Arthur smiles and shakes his head disbelievingly, landing a quick kiss to the tip of Merlin’s nose and smirking at the way his face scrunches in response:
“Well, now you do know. I will do anything, everything, to keep you happy and safe and loved. You will always be in my heart, if not by my side.”
Merlin smiles, and the two of them resolutely ignore the tears gathering in their eyes as he whispers his reply:
“As will I. I’ll talk to the Druids, Kilgharrah, Thornway, I’m sure we’ll be able to figure out some magical way to communicate.”
Arthur just smiles and nods, taking Merlin’s hands in his own once more:
“Ready to head to sleep? It’s late, and I know you’re tired.”
Merlin takes a deep breath, glancing to the thrones before walking towards the door, keeping Arthur’s hand securely in his:
“Yeah. Though unless we sneak past the others I doubt we’ll get to sleep for a while. Morgana’s been speaking to me in my head and teasing me for weeks and my mum keeps hinting at how politically beneficial a marriage between the kingdoms would be.”
Arthur doesn’t even try to hide his snort, but nods in agreement and squeezes Merlin’s hand, following him out into the star-lit evening with a newfound enthusiasm to see what the future will bring.
~
THE END OF PART 2!!!
I think I’ll write one more reeeaally short part, a ten years later sort of thing, just because I have a few more ideas about this, but no real huge plot points, just cute little things I want to add in but haven’t found space for yet.
This took a little longer than I expected to come out, but I hope y’all enjoyed it!!
(and yes, I may have taken a little inspiration from The Hobbit movies, sue me (pls don’t, I’m kidding))
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larrikin-is-a-himbo · 3 years
Text
My friend watches Merlin: Part II
How many fucking things are under this castle The water supply, catacombs, dragon cave, the dungeons, and now mystery death cave
Killing magic stuff seemingly runs in the family Great-something grandpa ordered to kill a wizard just because he was powerful
“This isn’t more than just a story” ARE. YOU. KIDDING. ME.
This motherfucker just straight up ready to replace Merlin after all the things he’s done for him Or at least seemingly so far
Arthur better get the fucking Zuko treatment in the end or I’m suing
AH FUCK I hate gargoyles Unless they’re designed specifically for monsterfuckers
Mmmmm I know it’s in the mythology but I’m not sure I like the Gwen X Arthur ship
Back to the fucking dragon I suppose
Oh the fucking king is going to be even more insufferable this season isn’t he God bless Merlin’s patience
Oh we playin’ switcheroo
Also I saw the name Odin on the wikipage about Nimue and I was expecting the actual god, not just some random king I’m low-key disappointed yet again
Merlin just absolutely spilled his feelings and he’s 100% correct No wonder he’s tired He’s been doing everything in this fucking kingdom
For a bounty hunter this guy is surprisingly charismatic
GO TELL HIM GIRL TEAR HIM TO SHREDS
Gwen single handedly carrying the friend group
Girl you think letting the guy who never touched a spatula cook the dinner is a good idea
See, told you Merlin has to do everything. Again.
Morgana is doing magic unknowingly And she’s scared And Merlin is like “let’s ask the druids” You know, the people who the king tries to murder for no reason Surely that’s a wonderful idea
WHY ARE THERE SCORPIONS IN ENGLAND
See I told you They’re on a hunt for the druids
This is bad this is bad this is bad
DEADER LIKE DRUID GUY SEE I FUCKING TOLD YOU
Damn Mordred is really something isn’t he According to the myth he’s like evil or something from what I remember And I 100% see why he would turn that way after all this bullshit
LMAO Arthur was like “Stop hitting on her, she’s out of your range”
Really when Gaius dies (which I fucking hope he’s not going to but he probably will) my heart will shatter
Nooo they got best girl
“She’s more than just a friend for us” I’m sorry but I can’t unsee the queer in this
Noooo I hate these things I’m usually fine with naked mole rats But these are so bad
Woooh boy they kissed I low-key like this pairing more honestly Just on vibes
This motherfucker is going to die in the most glorious way By a naked rat
You know how this series should have ended Poly relationship Morgana, Gwen, Lancelot, Arthur and Merlin
A troll is about to catfish the king I’m only like, 50% seeing the problem here Cause for all I care the king could just marry one of those rats from the last episode
Nu uh, you ain’t talking to my boy Gaius like that
Eeeewwww
Seriously? THIS is the first double episode? The fucking troll? I’m about to throw up from this fucking Troll
NGL Arthur is finally growing on me He’s having his moments
The king is bad as he is originally, but now under the curse he’s even worse
This bitch needs to die as soon as possible Cause I can’t take the king being like this one more episode I’m done with his bullshit on regular mode
NA AH YOU FUCKER YOU WON’T LET THE GANG’S HARD EARNED WORK ON ARTHUR TO GO TO WASTE
LISTEN IM A MONSTERFUCKER BUT I DRAW THE LINES
FINALLY
We’re done I never want to think about these episodes again Ever In my life
Awkward almost hug is awkward But I guess it’s a start
These two episodes Were probably my least favorites from the series so far
MERLIN YOU ARE A FUCKING IDIOT YOU HAVE BEEN ALMOST KILLED WAY TOO MANY TIMES WHEN YOU *HAD* TO USE MAGIC, AND WHEN YOU DON’T HAVE TO, YOU JUST DO IT FOR FUNSIES LIKE “OH I’M SURE THIS WILL BE FINE”
Oh goodie, one anti magic freak wasn’t fucking enough
DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE HURT GAIUS YOU HALF BALD MOTHERFUCKER OR I SWEAR TO ALL THE GODS
Morgana honey, you’re not helping
OHH THIS FUCKER
Yet again, Gwen is the MVP
Hah, get fucked
LEAVE MORGANA ALONE
YEAH, GET FUCKED
“Yeah I sentenced you to death despise everything you’ve done to me over the years, but I’ll pay for everything my people trashed in your house. We good, right?”
TELL HIM GAIUS MY MAN
I feel like magic ladies in shadowy places is going to be a recurring theme in this show Also stalking the royal family
Dang girl I always love a women who has “I can kick your ass” energy
Why do I feel like the king is lying about not knowing this woman
What’s with all the people and their names starting with “Mor” Morgana, Mordred, Morgause
Mmmm She’s weird I don’t know if I like her vibes or not
I’m gonna give the misogyny a pass because this is like, around or older than the middle ages
Yeah the king definitely knows her
LMAO Why did he think letting MERLIN hold the rope was a good idea He’s a fucking twig
Bonding over dead parents, how nice
Ooooo family drama Half sisters
Arthur is growing on me
Dude I’m gonna cry
Mmmmm girl you’re a little sus
I would be ABSOLUTELY GLAD if he killed his father right then and there MERLIN W H Y I really fucking hope he knows he’s cutting the branch under himself everytime he says something bad about the magic, cause I can feel it all my 206 bones there will be a liar reveal episode or 2 where he tells Arthur about him being a wizard and it will be nasty
Yep, yep, fucking here we go again Merlin gets 2 black dots for this action, 1 for making the magic look bad and 1 for letting the king live
That’s exactly what I’m saying Gaius
Merlin you’re also a better person than me
Freya is so pretty
Aww, Merlin is trying to pick up a girl
Merlin trying to convince Arthur that he’s getting fat is true comedy Like how does he expect this won’t bite him in the ass later
Oof, there’s something wrong with this girl and it’s out of her control. It just reeks that energy
Oh shit I’m gonna cry by the end won’t I
✨kiss✨
Merlin you can’t just raid Morgana’s closet
LMAO Gwen
Arthur doesn’t even want to ask questions anymore At least he doesn’t judge 🤷‍♂️
KC I WENT THROUGH TOO MANY OF THESE SITUATIONS BEFORE NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO KC IT’S SO CUTE I WENT THROUGH SO MANY EMOTIONS IN SO LITTLE TIME
Poor Arthur They keep fucking with him by making him fall in love with random women
Oh she’s a bitch
Ah shit, Mr. Magic Man
Oh my god This is going to end very bad
Gee, Merlin, it’s not like we had this exact fucking scenario last season KC THIS IDIOT IS CLIMBING A WALL
Woah there, that’s not consent Nevermind
Poor Gwen, she’s the real victim here
Damn, Arthur is getting his ass kicked Of course the answer is love What else would it be
Gwen saves the day
Oh shit Mordred is with bandits Oh i dont like where this is going Mordred is so cute tho And I love Morgana
Merlin what the fuck He straight up set up Mordred to be killed I wouldn’t forgive him either honestly
Ah shit, future vision spoilers
Honestly I’m still pro magic people in almost every way I’m also on the same side with Morgana Morgana is on thin fucking ice honestly But I get it I would do the same
Uther is just cutting the branch under himself day by day He got almost killed by his biological kid and got disowned by his adopted kid now officially after 2 times she tried to coup against him Honestly at this point if he doesn’t realise he’s doing something wrong then there’s no hope for him at all
Magic lady bringing back the dead: check
Couple of girlbosses having a chat in the middle of the woods Oh she’s back at her room, convenient
Oh no Plagues?
Baby’s first battle scar
Oh shit, we Sleeping Beauty now?
Mmmmmm girl, that’s sketchy
Props to Gaius’ actor for keeping that face
Holy shit even the fucking dragon’s asleep Nevermind
Oh my god KC I’m so worried Whaaa Holy shit he’s about to Socrates Morgana NOOOOOOO NOOOOOOOOOOO
As much as I hate this dragon If I were in his place I would burn this place to the ground too
I hate how much I sympathize with the villains in this series Well “villains” There are no sides in this series
Oh my god Off to find daddy Well damn, daddy’s not half bad honestly
He is 101% correct
Such a nice moment I honestly teared up a little Yep, that’s what I expected It was too good to be true
They grow so much since the beginning Oh Merlin, you’re so humble You deserve the world Yeah close that window And never open it again Holy shit this was a good episode And a long one
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weakforarwen · 2 years
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The Witch’s Quickening
This was an exciting episode, and an important one; too bad it’s kinda riddled with plot holes?
Mordred was found by a group of renegades with magic whose leader convinced Mordred, and later, Morgana, to fight his cause. What I don’t understand is why this group rarely used magic. When Arthur attacked them, Alvarr was captured and all his people killed. Why did no one use magic to fend off the attack? The only time Alvarr used magic was to escape from prison with Morgana’s aid, and even then all he did was open a lock. I guess having magic and being able to use it are two different things. 
Something else I didn’t understand about Alvarr’s escape was how Morgana was able to drug the guards stationed outside his cell with only a small vial of Gaius’s sleeping potion. Just how powerful is that potion? It could knock down a horse, apparently, yet failed to stop Morgana’s dreams... 
Morgana’s central in this episode. Her connection to Mordred is as sweet as it is mysterious, but it’s her connection with Alvarr that drives her actions. Mordred convinced Morgana to steal the crystal from Uther, but Alvarr charmed her into switching sides and risking everything for him. His death, or sentencing, deeply upset Morgana and made her lash out at Uther, but I understand her anger and she was brave for “disowning” him. Morgana’s changed. This wasn’t the first time she criticized Uther for being a murderer (she did it in the pilot episode), but every confrontation takes her one step closer to the point of no return. 
Morgana has slowly been losing it this season: her relationship with Gwen is all but gone - she was even rude to Gwen this episode and didn’t apologize, and she despises Uther and knows everyone in Camelot would turn against her if they knew she has magic. She’s all alone in the castle... If only there was someone else like her, with magic, who could make her feel less alone, huh?
Uther often talks about the days of The Purge, but I still don’t understand how he managed to eradicate magic from Camelot. For example, he used Merlin’s father to imprison Kilgharrah, but even if Balinor called the great dragon to Camelot, someone else had to trap him inside the cave, right? And if dragons are so hard to kill how is Kilgharrah the “last” of his kind? Dragons can’t be killed with magic, and the season finale shows humans can’t kill them either. Did the dragonlords, who are supposed to respect dragons, kill them before being killed by Uther? Uther had the help of Nimueh, a High Priestess, to help Ygraine give birth to Arthur. Did she help trap the dragon? I can’t see why she’d do that... And how did someone as powerful as Nimueh let Uther destroy everything related to the Old Religion? How did Uther manage to track down and steal so many powerful magical objects? How did his Army hunt down and kill those with magic? Are most who are born with magic too weak to defend themselves? I fear that must be it. Most don’t even learn how to wield their magic properly... But it’s still impossible to believe that Uther alone could trick so many warlocks and witches and destroy so much of the Old Religion. He must be some kind of genius. 
Also, did Uther suspect Morgana of freeing Alvarr after their argument? I believe he did, but he let it go...
Merlin’s role this episode was to stop Morgana, Mordred, and the group of renegades from getting the crystal. At first, I wondered why he would stop them from killing Uther, but then Alvarr told Morgana he would destroy everyone in his path... Honestly, Uther waged a war against magic and took many innocent lives, so if people with magic wanted to take back their rights, they had little choice but to wage a war against Uther. However, innocent people would die in the progress and Alvarr himself didn’t seem too trustworthy, so I understand why Merlin wants to stick to Arthur. If Arthur can become King and bring back magic, there’s no need for bloodshed. In theory, Arthur is the “peaceful” solution - except that, in order to prevent a war between Uther and those with magic, a lot more blood ended up being spilled. 
Merlin is seduced by the crystal to see the future, and I believe he saw Kilgharrah taking his revenge on Camelot. Shouldn’t the crystal have shown Merlin something a tad more exciting and important? Also, Merlin lowkey tried to kill Mordred this episode, and Mordred told him he’d never forget what he did, but fast-forward to season 5 and he’s forgotten everything... How did Mordred survive without a family? Was he taken in by the Druids? What happened to him between seasons 2 and 5? So many questions, so little answers.
Lastly, is it just me or was Arthur an even bigger asshole to Merlin than usual in this episode? After watching seasons 4 and 5, I got used to Arthur being almost decent to Merlin, so their dynamic in the early seasons is shocking. Just in this episode, Arthur screamed in Merlin’s face that he was good at nothing, called him useless and a coward a dozen times, and threatened to kill him. Merlin was barely even fazed, which is either impressive and shows he’s confident enough to not be bothered by Arthur’s petty insults, or sad because he just takes it... 
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flashhwing · 2 years
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“I never should’ve trusted Morgana because she’s evil now” she never would have turned against you if you HAD ACTUALLY trusted her! do you know why she was so susceptible to Morgause? because YOU lied to her! YOU kept her at arm’s length! YOU isolated her from any other, more positive magical support system! YOU helped wipe out the druids and everyone else trying to help her! is it any wonder she turned against Camelot when everyone in Camelot seemingly wants every magic user dead? fucking THINK Merlin! the only reason you’ve been thriving is because you have Gaius, you have the dragon, you have Lancelot, you have people who know about your magic and support you. Morgana has some strangers who almost helped her and then died, and You, who never told her the truth about yourself, who encouraged her to hide and turn away from her magic, who literally fucking poisoned her. she’s not evil, she’s traumatized!
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natvrefairy · 3 years
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Hi, I saw ur request rules and wondered if I could ask for a merlin X reader (romantic) and it's like really fluffy? Thx 😊
A/N: Of course! I'm so happy my first request is for Merlin, because both him and the entire show are just so iconic. I really hope you like this. :)
Something Meaningful (Merlin x Reader)
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Requested: Yes!
Reader Pronouns: They/them
Word Count: 1,529
C/W: Uther is dead. A little bit of self-doubt on Merlin's side. Occasional rant. A little bit of stream of consciousness. (Cause I'm experimenting with that technique.) Fluff!
Context: Morgana's alive and good. Mordred and the rest of the knights are also still alive, but they're not really mentioned. Arthur and Gwen are King and Queen. Arthur's allowed magic in Camelot, and they know about and accept Merlin! And LGBTQ+ is accepted! (Cause reader is they/them, and there's no angst here. ^^)
✎﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏
When Uther died, Camelot was a bit of a mess. Not that it wasn't before; Uther's reign wasn't a particularly cheerful one. But although he wasn't the kindest person, people still loved him, and his death simply came as a shock to everyone.
Arthur took it the hardest. But honestly, that was to be expected. When most people lose their parent, they get time to grieve, but Arthur didn't have the luxury of time. Uther died, and Arthur was thrown into power.
The first few months were the worst. Not just for Arthur, but the whole castle. But with Guinevere and Merlin by his side, he got through it. And with Arthur as King, it no longer mattered what anyone thought of his relationship with Gwen, because she was now the Queen.
But with Guinevere becoming Queen, a small issue arose. The Lady Morgana no longer had a servant.
Morgana, being as lovely as she was, truly didn't care about the loss of her maidservant. She still had her friend, and enjoyed her independence. But her brother thought it necessary, so the job was given to (Y/N).
Gaius didn't appreciate losing his other helper, but he couldn't say no to the King, so that was that.
But then, Gwen also needed a servant. And once again, the job was given to (Y/N). Merlin most definitely did not approve of his best friend's drastic increase in work load.
"I always knew you were an ass, but I didn't realise you were stupid as well." Merlin told Arthur the following morning.
Arthur's new title as King didn't change Merlin's attitude towards him in the slightest.
"Merlin, you can't address me like that."
"I did before, why is it any different now? Your highness."
"I am the King."
"Doesn't change the fact that you're an ass."
(Y/N) managed to talk Merlin down, but that didn't mean he liked the idea of them having to rush around everywhere all the time. Although, at least it was only Gwen and Morgana, who were both perfectly capable of taking care of themselves.
If it was two Arthur's, that would be an entirely different story.
That was about two years ago now. Camelot has had law changes since; such as the lifted ban on magic, allowing people to freely practise their gift, and the new acceptance of anyone identifying as other than cisgender/heterosexual.
And finally, at long last, the land of Albion was united.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
Having both grown up in Ealdor, Merlin and (Y/N) were always close. (Y/N) would constantly seek out Merlin and William, the three of them soon becoming best friends. When Merlin set off to Camelot, (Y/N) tagged along to look out for him, Will staying behind with his father.
Unlike Merlin, (Y/N) didn't possess any magic. But although being completely normal, they always went out of their way to try understand what their friend was going through. They never understood Uther's hatred towards magic. Even without having any themself, they absolutely adored Merlin's gift. Witnessing him in action never failed to put (Y/N) in a state of awe.
But of course, Merlin is much more than his magic. That, (Y/N) always knew, even when he didn't believe it himself. They were always there for him, and he was always there for them. That was how it always was, and how it always will be.
Which is why it was so hard for either of them to pinpoint exactly when their feelings grew. They always cared deeply for each other, but at some point, both completely unaware, those feelings blossomed until they were both completely and utterly in love.
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
The two friends were granted the evening off, and unbeknownst to (Y/N), Gwen and Morgana had something up their sleeve. Having long figured out the pair's mutual yet oblivious feelings, the women decided to take matters into their own hands.
This involved giving them the evening off, and directly telling Merlin to confess.
"I'm sure they feel the same way," Gwen encouraged, "I know it's hard, but try something meaningful. If you can't say how you feel out loud, do something special instead."
So here Merlin was, a nervous wreck as he lead (Y/N) outside of Camelot, to a small forest clearing. What if they didn't like it? What if they turned him down? Then it could lead to disaster and they won't want to be his friend anymore and everything they had built will go to waste.
"Merlin," (Y/N) grasps his hand, immediately gaining his attention, "whatever has you stressing out, it's okay. I'm here, and I always will be. We'll face it together."
Taking a deep breath, he had them close their eyes, before gently leading them in the right direction. Glancing around to make sure everything was in place, he tried his best to calm his nerves.
'You can do this,' he thought to himself, 'you can tell dragons what to do, and they listen. This should be easy.'
"Merlin?"
"Oh, right, sorry. You can open your eyes now."
Opening their eyes, (Y/N) gaped at the scene before them. A rug laid out on the grass, all their favourite snacks and fruit laid out in front of them. Glancing between the dinner and Merlin in a combination of joy and surprise, they struggled for words.
"You did all of this?"
"Well, I may have stolen some things from the kitchen, but... I hope you like it?"
(Y/N) laughed - one of Merlin's favourite sounds - and pulled him over to sit down.
"Thank you."
Just their smile was enough to calm Merlin's nerves, and everything melted away as they began to eat, telling stories and laughing. Everything between them seemed perfect.
That is, everything except for the unsaid feelings.
As they finished and the moon began to rise, they cleared up a bit before laying down to stargaze.
"Star-gazing was a good idea," (Y/N) said softly after a while, turning their head to face Merlin, "but I have to ask, what was this all for?"
"What? Aren't I allowed to just spend time with my best friend?" Merlin replied, a little too quickly.
"Of course, but that's not what I mean. You seemed really nervous earlier. I can tell when you want to say something, Merlin."
He turned his head away in embarrassment, so (Y/N) shifted their body to properly face him.
"Hey, look at me," they said, placing their hand on his cheek and tilting his head back towards them, "you know you can always tell me anything. We've been through so much together. Nothing will scare me away."
Merlin gazed into their eyes in silence for a moment, before speaking up, voice barely a whisper, "It's hard to say it out loud. Can I just show you?"
"Of course. Whatever's best for you."
Slowly, he moved one hand to rest on (Y/N)'s cheek, hesitating slightly as his gaze shifted between their captivating (E/C) eyes and plump lips. Finally, deciding it's either now or never, he leaned forward, tilting his head as he captured their lips in a tentative kiss. He felt them stiffen slightly, his heart racing as his mind flooded with unwanted thoughts. This was the end. They were going to shove him away and never speak to him again.
But then, the thing he expected least of all happened; they actually reciprocated the kiss.
Their hand moved to his hair, butterflies going wild in their stomach. They never expected him to feel the same way about them, and now they couldn't even think straight. The only thing they could concentrate on was the feeling of his lips on their own.
Eventually, the sweet moment came to an end, leaving each of them completely breathless, faces only inches apart. They gazed into each other's eyes, catching their breath while they both tried to process what just occurred.
Then, all at once Merlin freaked out and started a rant, desperately trying to explain himself. Apology after apology flooded out of his mouth, raving on and on about how much he loves them and how he probably ruined everything and should have just kept his feelings all to himself.
(Y/N) cut him off with a small kiss on his lips, leaving him staring at them in shock when they pulled away.
"I love you too, Merlin. I thought I was so obvious about it," she laughed softly, gently running her fingers through his hair. "I'm so lucky to have you in my life, and I'm glad you feel the same."
His shock vanished, and he gave that heartwarming smile of his as he wrapped his arms around them, pulling them close. "You have no idea how happy that makes me."
And so they stayed there like that, laying and enjoying each other's company in the comfort of their mutual feelings. They stayed there until they decided it was time to head back and face Gaius' concerned wrath on them staying out so late. But for once, it didn't bother them listening to his lecture, because their lives had just changed for the better.
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panharmonium · 4 years
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Hey! I know you really dislike the merlin finale, but I was wondering what you think about how they revealed Merlin's magic to arthur. Sorry if you've already talked about this. Thanks!
Hi!  Yeah, you’re right, I do really dislike the finale X)  And as for the magic reveal - aka the scene with the “i use it for you, only for you” line?  Yeah, it’s not really my cup of tea.
I try not to talk about the finale too much, because I mostly try to engage with Merlin in a positive way and the finale is something about which I really only have negative things to say.  It’s a failure of storytelling on a catastrophic scale, and I don’t think this scene is any better than the rest of it, personally.
It’s - it’s kind of hard for me to critique individual scenes in the finale, because for me the entire premise of the last two episodes is just so flawed that analyzing bits of it in more detail just feels silly, but some of the things I find unsatisfying about it are these:
- I don’t think Merlin would confess.  I just don’t.  Especially in a situation where it wasn’t unavoidably necessary.  There was no reason why Gaius couldn’t just tell Arthur “we need to get you to the Lake of Avalon to be healed; Merlin will take you.”  There wasn’t any inescapable need for Arthur to be told that Merlin has magic, and without being forced to, by circumstances beyond his control, I don’t believe Merlin would ever willingly give up his secret.  (Maybe later, when they’re approached by soldiers and Merlin has no choice but to use magic to fight them off - but I don’t think Merlin would ever reveal himself without his hand being forced.)
- I do not think Merlin desperately scrambling to justify his existence as a person with magic by saying “I use it for you; only for you” was the right tone for the writers to have him take at the end of this show.
- to clarify: I despise that line.  What message, exactly, are we trying to communicate here?  The point of the ‘liberate magic from oppression’ storyline was that we were trying to get to a spot where people with magic could proudly say it is not a crime to fight for the right to be who you are.  The story was supposed to be driving at the world’s recognition that there is nothing inherently wrong with having or using magic, and Merlin was supposed to be the one ultimately championing that cause.  But instead we chose to end on a flinching, desperate note of ‘i have magic, BUT!  i only use it for you, so it’s okay.  i’m not bad like all those other people.’
That’s bullshit.  Merlin should not have to provide a “but - ” at the end of “i have magic.”  That is not the message this show was driving at for the previous five seasons.  Merlin was supposed to reach a point where he could genuinely declare what Dragoon confuses Camelot’s dungeon guards with: i am who i am and i am who i was and i am who i always will be.  And Arthur was supposed to reach a point where he would acknowledge that magical folk do not need to apologize or make excuses for their existence.
Moreover - the line ‘i use it for you, only for you’ is untrue, no matter how much shippers love hearing it.  Merlin does not and has never used his magic solely for Arthur’s benefit.  Never.  Merlin uses magic for his own purposes, his own missions, for things he personally thinks are important.  He protects Ealdor, hides Freya, helps Lancelot become a knight, retrieves the dragon egg, releases Kilgharrah, saves his mother, heals Gwen’s father, rescues little Mordred.  He does his chores with magic so he can sit around and read books.  He cleans stained shirts with magic so he can show off for his friend.  He makes horses out of smoke and dragons out of sparks because it's fun.  His magic is not and has never been a gift for Arthur alone; it’s part of who Merlin is.
I just think the show missed the mark with this moment.  There is nothing about it that I find compelling or emotionally satisfying.  It does not take Merlin’s character anywhere near the place where he was ultimately supposed to go.  And trying to wrap up Arthur’s “change of heart” on magic in one episode was impossibly ill-conceived.  It doesn’t feel believable.  There is no way that a situation of this magnitude could have been resolved so quickly.  The way they zip Arthur from “magic bad” to “magic good” does his character a terrible disservice.  He’s never allowed to grow or come to the conclusion “magic good” on his own.  He never has to work for it, so his turnaround feels completely empty.  It’s not a victory.  It’s a waste of his potential.  He didn’t have to do any hard work to change himself, so he didn’t actually achieve anything.
I know there are other people out there who really like the finale, and that’s fine; I’m glad folks are enjoying themselves!  It’s just not something I can engage with, personally.  I don’t recognize the last two episodes as good storytelling, so most of the time I just try to ignore them and focus on other things.
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