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peterspinkrobe · 1 year ago

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Communion | AU Priest Miguel O’Hara x female Reader

A/N: I commissioned the above Priest Miguel. Ever since the artist sent the sketch, (@ ejpuki on twitter plz go show love!) this story has been a brewin’ in my cranium. I am not a newbie when it comes to fanfic, but a virgin to writing Miguel. Please accept this offering to the mania that is fandom. Feedback is appreciated. I know the tenses are probably all over the place. Part 2 is live!!. Let me know if you’re interested ~~

Warnings: Religious content, parents, dirty-minded reader, no mention of Y/N

As you sat in the middle pew, aisle seats, you fiddled with the dress your mother guilted you into wearing. The hem of the skirt had a little fraying and you couldn’t help but pick at it.

The meddling was met with a small smack on your wrist from your mother.

“Stop! You’re going to make it worse! I know it’s an old dress but it will only look that way if you pick at it.” The sharpness in tone and the lacy lilac dress from high school brought you back to all of the Sunday mornings you’d been ripped from the comfort of your bed to attend church.

Church. Your head was already starting to hurt from the early morning light pouring through the stained glasses windows, but your tried to remain neutral to spare mom.

Your relationship with the Almighty soured not long after your father passed. Faith was hard to come by and the struggles you’d faced recently only strained that even further.

“Sorry, mama.” You say quietly, acting like you’re still twelve and not in your mid twenties.

Ever since you moved back in you’ve had to live under “her rules”. Sunday service is one of those rules. Considering the headache you’ve caused her recently, you ignore your own and do as she asks. It’s only fair.

But church? Last week was your first time back inside a church since leaving for college five years ago. It was the same one you’d been dragged to in your younger years. The same stained pews, same old books of Psalms, same feeling of estrangement despite being surrounded by the same old folks.

Your mom had turned her attention to the lady that lived on our street and you turned your own attention to your fingernails, scraping underneath them for dirt that wasn’t there. You think about how you had dropped the habit until moving back in, but was interrupted by microphone static.

You pulled your gaze to the front of the church and saw Father Steen tapping the microphone. Despite only being five years since you last saw him, the man seemed to have aged decades. His frail frame balanced on the podium as he spoke. You realized why the microphone was needed when he started speaking - amplifying the hushed tone of the elder addressing his congregation.

“Good morning and many blessings to you all this Sunday morning,” he began and you couldn’t help but lower your gaze back to the frayed bit of your dress. His monotone voice was… kinda boring. You hated thinking that way because Father Steen was such a good man and he cared for your mother greatly when dad passed. He was mentioning an upcoming surgery and you were back to picking at your fingernails. His voice eked on through the speakers, “so we will be having a transitional deacon come in to take over my position until I recover. This fine young man has graciously accepted this position as he is working to become a priest himself. Please welcome Mr. O’Hara as he leads us in prayer to begin communion for this month.”

There is respectful applause and your eyes are still on your hands until your mom elbows you gently. You start to apologize again for not paying attention but notice she and her pew neighbor are giggling as they clap. You start to clap your own hands as you look up at what they were giggling like schoolgirls about when your hands freeze in their clapped position - almost like you’re praying.

The deacon that Father Steen introduced was… gorgeous, and he was looking at you. You blushed, embarrassingly, under the gaze of the dark eyes. Could he tell you hadn’t been paying attention?

Well, you most certainly were now.

You pulled your eyes away from him to look at your mother who was wiggling her eyebrows at you, causing you to blush even deeper and turn back to the front.

The first thing you notice about the man standing at the front of the church was his height. He towered over the podium he placed a hand on. Father Steen came up to only just above his elbows with his hunched body.

The eyes that were watching you now surveyed the room and the light from the windows shown dark, warm pools of irises. His face…

Sharp symmetry made up his countenance. Distinct cheekbones bobbing as the smooth bronze skin stretched upwards into a smile. The strong jawline accentuated with the muscles of his lips pulling back, revealing a dazzling toothy smile.

When he spoke for the first time, you understood why your mom cried during Psalms at times. His voice was gospel.

“Thank you, all, for welcoming me into your parish. I know that you have received excellent spiritual guidance from Father Steen. I can only hope to at least partially fill his shoes in his absence.” His voice boomed throughout the church with no need for a microphone. “Before we begin the sacred ritual that is communion, let us bow our heads in prayer.”

The church around you dutifully lowered their heads, and you did the same. Hating closing your eyes to the alluring man in front of the church. At least his voice still filled your ears with song.

“Heavenly Father, we are gathered here today, in your house, in the name of your Son to receive the Body and Blood of Christ…” you decide it won’t be such a terrible sin to sneak a peek during prayer. You lift your head up to catch another glimpse at the ethereal creature leading prayer while he wasn’t looking.

But he was looking. Right at you as he continued to recite, “We are all sinners, and we are all in need of your grace and forgiveness.” You start to think about how much you needed his grace, when you pinch yourself for the blasphemy.

You’re still staring at each other as he finishes, “We pray that You will bless this communion and that it will deepen our relationships with You.” You instantly feel heat in your gut when you wonder just how deep it can go..

You think you see him grin slightly, but he pulls his eyes away from yours and you quickly put your head back down.

“In Your Blessed Name, Amen.” He ends. “Amen”, the church responds in unison and you squeak it out as well.

The first pew stands and approaches the front of the church, choir boys retrieving the communion goods. You notice that there is a split in the line as one is given the small wafer and grape juice shot by Father Steen and the other line the new deacon.

You can’t keep your eyes off him as he offers the sacrament to each person in line. He is taking longer than Father Steen, seeming to ask questions before presenting the body and blood of a savior.

As it came to be your pew’s turn, you stood. With only a few people in front of you, you studied Miguel’s figure in short glances.

Along with being a towering figure, he was a wide one as well. Muscles filled in the long-sleeved black button down shirt. His large upper body tapered off into a slim waist, tucked neatly into dark pants. A belt accentuated the fit waist even further. Your eyes trailed quickly across the thick neck that was accessorized by the all too familiar white collar of priesthood. When you were just behind one more person, your eyes fell to the floor.

Part of you wished you would be on Father Steen’s side as you feel as though you’re about to burst from this proximity of the giant man. He was bent over speaking to an elder of the church, giving her a soft smile as she blessed him for coming to ‘our little church.’

The man in line in front of you stood to Father Steen and the woman was letting Mr. O’Hara go from a sweet embrace.

Thank God, you guessed, for the years of attending communion as your muscle memory tore your legs from their form rooted position at the altar.

You approached the tall figure and your eyes are locked on the lips of the man in front of you. You see them move, hearing nothing but the beating of your heart in your eardrums.

“I-I’m sorry. What?” You sputter the words and heat creeps into your chest and face.

A soft chuckle escapes his full lips and he smiles as he repeats, “What is your name?”

You give it to him. And he says it. The way your name sounds in his music makes you smile up at him. He holds your gaze for a moment before speaking again.

“The Body of Christ.” He extends his hand in an upward position, the white wafer between his index finger and thumb.

You bow your head slightly in reverence of the offering. As you start to pull your head up again, his pinky and ring finger catch under your chin, lifting your face the rest of the way.

You breathe out a small gasp and open your mouth. He seems to mirror the action slightly as his own mouth drops slightly open. You extend your tongue a little as he places the thin wafer onto it.

His gaze is heavy as he watches you take the offering into your mouth. Your breath hitches when he runs his thumb across your pouted bottom lip, catching some saliva with it.

“Amen.” You respond and it’s not until he pulls his hand from your face when you turn to grab a small glass of grape juice. “The Precious Blood.” You hear him say behind you as you bring the glass to your lips, relishing the sweet refreshment.

Your face is red hot as you turn to walk back to your pew, ignoring your mother’s glances as she had already been back to her seat.

The burning in your cheeks is even more fiery as it dawns on you that the whole church saw the exchange. You hope, you pray, that it was perceived as a normal moment between a new Shepard and a member of his flock.

Communion wraps up and Father Steen takes a seat behind the the new head of church as he begins his sermon. The slight pressure of his thumb on your bottom lip created a pool of heat in your belly that wouldn’t go away.

You try to pay attention to the Good Word, you really do, but your mind is other places. Definitely not holy places.

Maybe coming to church won’t be too bad after all…

#miguel o'hara #miguel x reader #priest au #atsv miguel #miguel x you #how do i even tag this #fanfic #spiderverse fanfic

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depressopax · 8 months ago

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hiii! im not sure if you write for gus (brba/bcs) but if you do, could i request a few headcanons (sfw or nsfw) of him with a gender neutral partner if possible :0 maybe qualities he finds attractive/would like in a partner, physically or personality wise or whatever you have in mind:] tysm ! i hope youre having a good one ♡

Tysm for the request!! <3 I made it into some relationship headcanons but tried mentioning what he likes in a partner etc… It may have turned out a bit dark lol, sorry ‘bout that 😭 Anywaysss hope ya like it! Have a good day anon!! 🫶

Gus Fring relationship headcanons

Fandom - Breaking Bad/Better call Saul

Gus x gn!reader - (N)SFW headcanons

Pairing: Gus Fring x gender-neutral reader Genre: Fluff, smut, (kinda angst too??), headcanons Warning(s): Slightly possessive Gus, cuss words. Sexual content (marked further down as “NSFW”, MDNI! Dom/sub dynamic, degradation. Words: 1.4k Summary: Being in a relationship with Gus Fring would include… English is not my main language, if I make any spelling mistakes please let me know so I can improve my writing! <3 || AO3 link || Masterlist || Request ||

SFW

First time Gus saw you was at Los Pollos Hermanos.

You were there with some friends and you immediately caught his eye.

Maybe it was your smile, your eyes or the way you talked to your friends that made his heart skip a beat

That, or the fact you and him made eye contact at least 4 times.

But because of his dangerous life and past relationship traumas, he let you slip through his fingers, to not drag you into his chaos.

Or so he thought at least.

Truth is, you felt a spark, too. There was something dangerous about him, but also something charming.

Curious as you were, you went to LPH more often, hoping to catch a glimpse of the mysterious man - eventually learning he’s the manager.

Gus of course noticed you being there more often. Ignoring you got harder.

One day you decided to shoot your shot - the same day he decided to strike a conversation with you.

You learned his name is Gustavo Fring.

There was something about his smile and way of talking that charmed you.

But he also seemed very reserved and troubled. He seemed afraid to answer your flirting and got really flustered from it.

Just as you were about to give up your flirting attempts, he surprised you by asking you out on a date.

Of course, you said yes.

Gus enjoys good food and luxury, so it was no surprise he took you to a 5-star restaurant for the first date - his treat.

Not having been on a “real date” in over a decade, Gus was a nervous wreck lmao

Luckily he is good at handling stress. You barely noticed the emotions he kept under the surface.

The date went really well. Gus is a good listener and listened to you in a way that was rare.

Even when you got a bit too nerdy about your interests, he listened with a smile.

But it did make you a bit concerned when he dodged questions about his own personal life.

He realized himself how weird that must've come across, getting anxious that you wouldn’t contact him again.

Luckily, you did.

Gus kept taking you on dates.

The more he got to know you, the harder he fell in love.

Actually - he figured he was in love already after the first kiss.

Once getting clarity in what he felt, he knew what he had to do - Telling you the truth about who he is.

The fear of losing you was big.

…But the fear of you staying, becoming part of his dangers - was bigger.

He explained to you how he had fallen in love with you, before dropping the bomb.

You were shocked, of course.

After some days of thinking about what he’d told you, you made a decision.

Upon telling him; Gus felt a wave of emotions: Confusion, happiness, relief but also anxiety. But he put all that aside.

Gus officially became your boyfriend and you couldn’t be more happy - neither could he.

All dangers aside - Gus does everything to be “boyfriend material” lol

His love language is touch, and words of affirmation.

He doesn’t let a day go by without telling you how much he loves you.

He always wants you close - just holding your hand makes him feel good.

He also likes spoiling you - expensive gifts, homemade dinners, road trips with him etc…

He basically spends all his spare-time with you.

You spend a lot of time in his house, with or without him.

He has money, enough to provide you safety.

Because of his enemies, and dangerous life, Gus gets very overprotective and a bit possessive.

Ngl he’d probably hire a bodyguard for you whenever you are away in another town with friends/family 😭 Or ask Mike to keep an eye on you lol

He’d be too paranoid to openly be in a relationship with you - but tell a few people he really trusted. If he could, he’d tell the whole world tho. He loves you and it frustrates him to not be able to tell people.

Gus is very good at reading people, so he often can see if something is wrong.

He’s a good listener and tries to always see things from your POV

He rarely gets mad at you either.

Most of the time he’s calm and understanding.

He tries to always be there for you, if not with advice, at least with support and to offer you comfort.

He also gives really good hugs 😌✨

Same goes for your interests/hobbies. He learns for example how to crochet, paint or whatever so you can make it a date.

He’ll let you talk about things you like for hours

Gus is not the type of person that likes indoor activities. Of course he appreciates movie nights, but I feel like he enjoys spending time outdoors.

Going hiking, walks in the forest, sightseeing etc etc

Weather doesn’t really matter to him. He’s def one of those that tells you to “Dress depending on the weather 🤪🤪”

He enjoys cooking food for you, but also with you.

He’ll teach you some old family recipes

When eating, he lits candles and makes it cozy so it feels like a restaurant.

Gus appreciates movie nights too. Snacks, wine and cuddles whilst watching something.

Gus is cheesy in the way of envisioning his future with you.

He knows that one day, he wants to marry you.

As for starting a family, he’d like that - if you want to have kids too, ofc.

Otherwise he’ll just be happy to marry you and always have you by his side.

To summarize: Gus is very overprotective when it comes to you, but his criminal lifestyle aside - he loves you deeply and a relationship with him would be passionate.

NSFW

I feel like he’s definitely a dom

But more of a soft dom.

He’s on top, always. Convincing him otherwise is not easy.

He can get pretty rough, but would never hurt you or make you uncomfortable.

His sex drive isn’t that high, but he makes an exception for you.

Besides, you just happen to turn him on a lot 🤭

He prefers to do it at home and in bed

However… If you happen to tease him when in public, he’ll find a private spot and just take you there. “You couldn’t wait until we got home? Pathetic” …As he thrusts into you and muffles your moans with his palm

He prefers to take you at a fast pace, one that’ll leave you breathless.

He has a lot of pent up frustrations and releases all tension in the bedroom.

He’ll have you laying under him, pinning your wrist over your head as he makes you into a moaning mess.

He has a lot of stamina and can go at it for hours.

If he’s feeling rude, he’ll have you beg for him and/or plead for him to slow down to give you a break.

Only for him to laugh and tease you for it “My poor baby… Look at me.” “I’m not done with you just yet.” “Be good for me, my love.”

When it comes to you, he likes both praising and degrading you - doing so equally.

He’ll have sweet nicknames for you as well as insulting ones.

After sex, you’ll be covered in hickeys, which he’ll praise you for.

He prefers giving oral, merely because he’s in full control of your pleasure.

When going down on you, he’s a tease.

He’ll have you begging for him to use his mouth on you.

And he knows how to do it, too.

Gus likes using his hands too, to stimulate your area or other body parts.

He’ll grab your hips, thighs etc roughly, hard enough to leave marks.

When receiving, he likes being in control too.

He’ll hold your head still and move his hips to his own liking.

Gus prioritizes aftercare. He wouldn’t go to sleep without being reassured you’re ok after a rough session.

He’ll clean you and the bed up, run a bath for you, cuddle, give massage etc

Although he can be meanie during sex, he gives affection, praise and love afterwards, putting the dominant act away.

He falls asleep after you.

Since he’s rough in bed, you often end up falling asleep faster than usual - especially when he hugs you lovingly too.

He likes seeing your sleeping figure and falling asleep knowing that you’re all his…

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baldurs-gape · 5 months ago

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You have been perceived.

Oh Nonnie, trust me, I know. I have spent the last couple of days alternating between the sheer panic of having been perceived and also the deepest desire to know why?! There's over 2000 Bloodweave fics out there. Just how and why did Shores end up being the one he picked?! Especially with those tags. I almost feel compelled to profusely apologise that he had to read those with his own eyes. But then I remember that while the story is my sin, I'm not to blame for him noodling around on AO3. And if he did have a sneaky read, I bloody hope he was polite and at least left kudos.

Anyway. More importantly. You sent an ask and so you shall have a ficlet of thanks for finding my little corner of the fandom and interacting.

Mortal Hands

The room at the Elfsong Tavern was the height of luxury compared to the road the party had been on for so long. Various exclamations of relief and gratitude mixed with sighs and grumbles about who gets which bed. Perhaps the one Astarion picked wasn't ideal but as least it was in the corner, he could see the entrance to the room and, if needed, could probably make an escape route through a window. Without any discussion or ever question, the bed next to his was left empty for Gale. It took a few minutes for their wizard to drag himself in, looking more haggard and tired than usual. Obviously the message from Elminster about seeing mystra hadn't gone down very well. He looked ready to crash face first into the pillow and not resurface for tenday or so.

"You're going to get the bed filthy," Astarion drawled as he watched Gale blink at the bed with confused longing. "Get cleaned up. You can thank me when you're awake again."

A pout. The great Wizard of Waterdeep, the Chosen of Mystra, an archmage of great renown was pouting at Astarion like he'd just told him he can't have a second helping of pie and custard. That was just rude. Being the more mature of the two of them, Astarion rolled his eyes in response.

"Must I do everything? Come along." For all his griping, Astarion was up and leading Gale towards the wooden tub he'd spied earlier. It didn't take long to arrange for it to get filled with steaming hot water and he barely had any time to grab Gale by the arm and hoist him back before the other got in. "Were you raised by boars? You get in there like this and you'll be sitting in your own much. I should call you a filth wizard."

"But-" Gale began and was cut off with a hand gesture.

"Sit."

Thankfully Gale sat and actually looked grateful for it. His eyes closed as Astarion went about drawing a couple of buckets of water from the tub. Towels, a bar of soap from his own pack (pilfered from Raphael's rather decadent bath) and Gale's shaving kit.

First things first, Astarion bullied Gale into stripping, frowning at the bruises that were revealed. Not to mention that his wizard looked more slender than before. They were going to have to pay more attention to supplies it seemed. Once naked, Astarion picked up a bucket.

"Close your eyes and hold your breath."

"Wha-" The word morphed into a splutter as Gale spat water out. He was dripping and glaring, and it really shouldn't have been such a good look on him.

Not missing a beat, Astarion set about washing him from top down. Working shampoo into Gale's hair, he listened to the soft exhales, watched as Gale's shoulders slumped, head tipping into the touch. Astarion used his fingers to find tangles and gentle teased them out. Half a bucket rinsed the suds out. Next was the unsightly scruff of beard. It had been much better maintained but the shadowcursed lands hadn't exactly afforded them much opportunity for personal care.

"Is this really necessary?" Gale asked even as his hands settled on Astarion's hips to steady him in his lap. "Surely it can wait."

"You'll feel better. We'll go see Mystra tomorrow and tell her where she can shove the crown."

"She doesn't care about looks."

Astarion raised an eyebrow. "I don't care about what she thinks. I want you to feel good about yourself."

As he spoke, his hands worked gently over the scruff, cleaning it and working up another nice lather. Reaching for the razor, Astarion waited a moment, knowing all too well that Gale would try and speak whether he had a sharp blade against his skin or not. Sure enough, he was right.

"She won't be impressed by a bit of grooming. Not even hunting down a bit of magic would impress her."

"Do you know how much effort I'm having to put into not making a comment about Mystra and grooming?"

Gale sighed. "She's a goddess. She doesn't need to worry about things like grooming or wind blowing a wisp of hair out of the way."

Rather than say anything, Astarion stared at him and shook his head before taking a gentle hold of Gale's chin. The aim wasn't to get rid of the beard, just to tame it and return it to its more usual look. He felt the moment Gale realised the meaning of his words and his jaw flexed. In response, Astarion tightened his grip a little to keep him quiet.

Once satisfied with his work, Astarion used a towel to wiped him clean before reaching for another lotion. Yet another thing he'd lifted from Sharess' Caress, it was something to keep a beard softer. Rubbing it into Gale's facial hair felt oddly meditative and Astarion got lost for a moment in the feel of the hairs against his palms. It was only when Gale's head fell forwards before jerking back up that he realised they were both drifting.

"Only a little longer," he murmured and got up.

The last bucket of now tepid water was used to wipe the worst of the grim off Gale. His arms and legs were lifted on command and Astarion did his best not to laugh too much when he worked on cleaning ticklish feet and Gale squirmed, nose scrunched up.

Finally satisfied, Astarion nodded to himself and gestured at the tub which was warm but no longer scaling.

"Get in."

The groan Gale let out as he sank into the water came from the soul. Knees bent, he sank in until his shoulders were under the water, eyes closed. Astarion flipped a bucket upside down and sat on it behind him. Starting without a word, he let himself play with Gale's hair, fingers digging into his scalp as it turned into a massage. Deftly he moved down to his jaw, knowing that Gale had a tendency to grind his teeth which left him aching and frustrated quite often. Once his mouth was slack, Astarion returned to playing with his freshly tidied up beard, touching for the sake of enjoyment.

Under his care, Gale all but melted. He sleepily nuzzled into Astarion's palm, resting comfortably against it like it was the world's most decadent pillow. The trust of it had Astarion's throat tight. Nobody before Gale had put so much faith into him. The assumption that he would hold Gale, keep him above water and allow him to rest was the purest form of love Astarion could imagine.

"Come along, before you become the Wizard of Watersleep."

Drying a half awake Gale off, Astarion led him to the bed where Gale happily burrowed under the blanket. There was just one problem. Sleepy brown eyes stared at him imploringly. Astarion found it almost impossible to resist.

"Let me quickly get cleaned up. Then I'll join you."

Never in his life had he washed himself quicker. It was still too long. By the time he returned to Gale's side, the wizard was already asleep, blanket clutched to his chest in lieu of another body to hold. Somewhat disappointed, Astarion sat on the edge of the bed to watch. The dip in the mattress didn't wake Gale fully but he did snuffled and shuffled towards the edge of the bed, making more room. Taking the invitation, Astarion curled up next to him, smiling to himself when the blanket was kicked away in favour of Gale wrapping around him more securely than a mindflayer's tentacles around a head at feeding time.

Rest was quick to draw Astarion into a trance. It had been a long road and they weren't anywhere close to being done just yet. But at least he had Gale and Gale had him. That was going to have to be enough when they faced the monsters of their past in the next couple of days.

#bloodweave #astarion x gale #astarion/gale #astarion #bg3 astarion #gale dekarios #gale of waterdeep #bg3 #baldur's gate 3

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kiwiana-writes · 9 months ago

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Six(ish) Sentence Sunday

Don't forget, Fandom Trumps Hate bidding opens 8am EST on March 5th! Details of my offerings are here, and a roundup of all the RWRB offers can be found here.

Remember a couple days ago when I said thanks to the people who tagged me in the WIP ask game but my list had just hit 62 and I couldn't be bothered writing them all out? Well, welcome to #62. I watched a film, realised how many fics I've read based on it across a ton of fandoms in the last couple of decades, entered some sort of weird fugue state, and then there was a Google Doc open. As usual.

2019 Outside Kensington Palace, with the car waiting to take him back to the royals’ private airstrip, Alex seriously considers taking Henry’s phone out of his hand and plugging in his phone number. It’s the same tug in his gut that led him across a Buckingham Palace ballroom to poke and prod at Henry’s perfect princely veneer; the one that dragged him across the room to introduce himself at Rio; the one that used to pull him out of his bedroom and into June’s to open a magazine. But that’s not what’s happening here. They’re not friends, even if Alex did see a glimmer of something resembling a personality while lying elbow to elbow with Henry on the dusty floor of a cupboard. It’s a PR stunt, nothing more, and they both have people who are literally employed to make sure they both come out of this looking good. No point in complicating it. In the end, Alex only reaches out when it’s time to shake Henry’s hand in farewell, and then he climbs into the back of the car and ignores the nagging sensation of something left unfinished. 2029 Alex rolls out the crick in his neck as he steps off the plane in Austin, his shoulders relaxing with every step into the familiar terminal. A couple of months into his second congressional term, he’s only just starting to feel like he really has a handle on the House schedule and the punishing weekly commute back and forth between Texas and DC��but just because he doesn’t have a spouse and kids to come home to like many of his colleagues on the Hill, it doesn’t mean he’s not still spending as much time in his district as he possibly can. Even if it does mean he has an even heavier reliance on caffeine than he did during college and more frequent flyer miles than he’ll ever know what to do with.

Tagging @agame-writes @affectionatelyrs @anchoredarchangel @anincompletelist @celaestis1 @celeritas2997 @cha-melodius @clottedcreamfudge @cricketnationrise @cultofsappho @daisymae-12 @dumbpeachjuice @firenati0n @getmehighonmagic @happiness-of-the-pursuit @heybuddy-drabbles @hgejfmw-hgejhsf @indestructibleheart @indomitable-love @inexplicablymine @leaves-of-laurelin @littlemisskittentoes @lizzie-bennetdarcy @magicandarchery @matherines @myheartalivewrites @ninzied @nocoastposts @notspecialbabe @orchidscript @rmd-writes @sherryvalli @ships-to-sail @smc-27 @sparklepocalypse @ssmtskw @stereopticons @three-drink-amy @tintagel-or-cockleshells @welcometololaland @whimsymanaged and, as always, anyone who wants to play! (If you take the open tag please tag me so I can see!!)

#six sentence sunday #kiwiana-writes #fic: chemistry without a recipe

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olderthannetfic · 1 year ago

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Just curious, is Astolat fine with often being brought up in these talks and arguments about AO3's reason for existing? Just as a general thing, not like "talking about her being the origin for AO3" but more the focus on her works and her as a creator-expanding towards her work as a person in fandom.

I mean, I guess if things came down to it she could just dive down and make a new account for full anonymity for her fics again, but her Astolat name will still be THE ASTOLAT". I'm just interested from a perspective of interest I guess. Not to shame, or be like "How dare you drag someone into your arguments", and I'm not trying to make it sound like that! I genuinely I'm just curious about her stance on it, and since you apparently know her in a way I thought it was a simple way to ask. I know some creators, writers, artists try to distance themselves from certain things, and people parroting that to anyone who asks, so it's interesting to see someone not seemingly have a problem with it at first glance?

LOL.

Dude, astolat is a fellow fan. If you want to know how she feels about things, you should ask her.

I used to go to cons further from the West Coast, including ones she went to. I know her generally, just like a hell of a lot of LJ Olds know each other generally. We aren't, like, bosom buddies or anything, and IDK where she's actually hanging out these days. Her tumblr's pretty dead most of the time.

But as for whether she minds people bringing up Thorki... why would she mind?

Astolat is a bit older than I am, so she's, what, around 50? Why would she ~distance~ herself from perfectly good fic like a craven child?

Anyone who's a fandom old used to get flamed for liking m/m and had to build spaces that deterred the haters. AO3 is one of those spaces. We would no more take "Boo hoo, fictional incest turns people into perverts!" seriously than we would any of the other accusations we've gotten over the decades.

Anonymity isn't really a thing for that kind of fandom either. Sure, many people do hide their wallet name from the internet (though at this point, astolat's wallet name is extremely well known and she has openly connected her names online a few times), but I don't mean this.

I mean that for people of the LJ era or 90s slash zine era or whathaveyou, you pick one fannish handle and you stick with it. You're the same you forever and the people around you know you even if you aren't a BNF. I've had friends of friends of friends from LJ recognize me by my old LJ icon. It's a very small world.

It's a type of fandom that discusses. To write fic anyone at all bothered to read is to be discussed. Astolat has written more fic that more people have liked over a long period of time, so she's more discussed, but it's just a question of degree.

I assume she rolls her eyes when people treat her like an alien or a celebrity instead of a more-popular peer, but I've never actually asked her.

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bedlamsbard · 4 months ago

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Greetings from a Fan, I felt compelled to send this message after reading your posts regarding Queen's Gambit. My intent is not to upset or harm you, but I sincerely apologize if I do so nonetheless. I just wanted to say how much I absolutely *adore* the Ouroboros series. It's one of my favorites of all time across all the fandoms I'm interested in. It's also the reason I fell head over heels in love with the Obi-Wan/Anakin/Padme pairing. You've written the characters so incredibly well and I just cannot get over your amazing worldbuilding. I am an absolute sucker for the way you wrote Padme and the rich culture/history you created for Naboo. Those little details just added so much breath and flavor to your stories that to this day I remain speechless as to what you've created. With regards to Obi-Wan, oh my dear lord, what a heartbreaking masterpiece you created. The sheer level of love and anguish you brought forth after he lost Anakin was just devasting. He's such an incredibly complex character and you did a smashingly exceptional job with him. You really did him and his relationship with Anakin justice and I truly thank you for that. And Anakin, what can I say, there are so many layers to Anakin that there's never an easy way of writing him. But through his relationships with Obi-Wan and Padme, we can peel back those layers and you really took the time and care to do that. The entire series was an incredible concept in it's totality, and I love weird alternative universe/time-travel/fix-it fics. I will eternally lament that the series will never be finished because I would have loved to have read what happens in the next entry of the series which is where Obi-Wan fell to the Dark side (unless I'm mistaken). Nonetheless, I like to think that in the end they have their happy ending with one another (wherever it may have led them) and I thank you for sharing and posting this series with us. I know it meant a great deal to me and I would like you to know how I much I do sincerely mean that. Thank you. ❤️

Aww, thank you, I'm flattered to hear that! I know that Wake and Gambit (as well as the ancillaries Tales and Sound) are very loved stories for a lot of people, even when I get grief for them, which has been going on for more than a decade now. I'm always very glad to hear that readers do enjoy those stories.

The third Ouroboros story, which takes place in the universe that Padme arrives in during the last scene of Gambit, was supposed to be called All Along the Watchtower. There are bits and pieces of it in the all along the watchtower tag dating back about a decade now. It is a universe where Obi-Wan fell to the dark side and a bunch of other stuff happened as a result -- the three universes in Ouroboros are all meant to be the worst fears of the main three characters, thus canon (Wake) being Anakin's (he goes dark side and kills everyone he loves), Gambit being Padme's (she becomes a warmongering demagogue who causes a Jedi to betray himself for her), and Watchtower being Obi-Wan's (he goes dark side and is responsible for the downfall of the Republic and the Jedi Order). This is the most recent summary of what I remember that I was thinking; it went through a lot of development over the course of ten years, and as late as 2021 I was still trying to back into it via Rebels: the alternate universe where Ezra had been during The Starry Crown is the Watchtower 'verse, during the point in time where the Wake trio was there -- a.k.a. the Rebellion era, so they're also time traveling again. The Wake trio had all ended up in different locations in the Watchtower 'verse: we see Padme where she ended up at the end of Gambit, Anakin was on Coruscant, Obi-Wan was on Tatooine, and they're all dragged into the political events of that universe, which are very different from Wake, canon, or Gambit.

The intention was always for the Wake trio to end up back in their own universe, probably picking up Rex along the way; the base Wake universe is obviously suffering from Code Name Retribution, but the situation is not as bad as it could have been.

#curiously quiet #bedlam replies #ouroboros #all along the watchtower #feedback #bedlam vanity file

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solarwynd · 9 months ago

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Seeing how HYBE continues to move for JK honestly makes me sad. I thought they'd just give up on their vision after seeing how he failed to blow up, but they are clearly determined to keep at it until they succeed, and how long do you think it's gonna take?

They are already winning with the mediaplay, convincing people that JK is the most talented and successful member and people just don't seem to care how he got that success. And his solos and Armys who bias him are truly the most insufferable; talking about how he's untouchable. When pjms complained about that recent BB chart placing Jimin at #21, they got so smug about it saying pjms thought they touched heaven with LC's #1 on BB but Jungkook went on to achieve way more than Jimin and now they're lashing out because reality doesn't match with their hopes and dreams.

They say the BB #1 is the only thing JM has going for him and his fans are clinging to it for dear life to make ourselves feel better about the fact that he'll always be inferior to JK.

It just makes me sad because it's clear that JM's success can't be compared to JK's because JK had all the privileges while JM received the bear minimum combined with sabotage from all fronts and numerous articles from his own label downplaying him to make JK shine. Armys are even bragging about that BB article about JK having proved himself to be the "golden" one of BTS.

Is this really how it's going to be? JK is gonna go on to become successful, well-known and BTS' breakout star just like that? No consequences for him the fraud Scooter Braun and BPD have been committing for him? And Jimin is forever gonna be restricted to the kpop bubble without ever breaking out? JK is gonna be more successful than him?

During Seven - GOLDEN era when all the fandom's hypocrisy was exposed about them dragging JM for the bare minimum vs. supporting JK's blatant payola, and more people spoke about him "cheating" with endless remixes and the charts being manipulated for him all while they are making sure to suppress JM and keeping JM from rivaling him on the charts, I thought that the world was finally waking up, that more people outside the kpop bubble would speak out against the disgusting injustice done to JM and that the investors behind HYBE wouldn't let something like this be done to their most valuable asset.

But I guess I was naïve, and I'm ignorant about how the music industry/powerful companies actually work..

It just hurts so much. I even have tears in my eyes as I'm typing this, and I can't express to you just how much resentment I hold towards JK because of this. Sometimes I wish he'd just dye. And I know that's a terrible thing to wish upon someone, but I can't help it

I want to believe you guys who say Jimin will always be successful no matter what, that he'll commercially break out eventually as a soloist and that Scooter and Bang PD's plans for JK will fail, but I don't see any of those things happening. Instead it's the opposite. JK is slowly becoming known outside the Kpop bubble, while Jimin seems to be fading into obscurity. And JK clearly has new things coming up and probably a few more collaborations with well known American artists, or will eventually once he's out of MS. It feels like it's only a matter of time before he does a collaboration with artists like Chris Brown, Justin Bieber, Zayn or Shawn Mendes. And what do you think will happen then? His career will most definitely skyrocket.

This whole thing has just made me so pessimistic about life. Does karma not exist? Do people who do bad things always just get away with it just like that? Probably two decades since Scooter Braun has been working as a music producer and probably for more than a decade people have seen just what an evil human being he is and what he's done to others, and none of these people have tried to come together and get rid of him?

I wish I never discovered BTS and Jimin.

“Instead it's the opposite. JK is slowly becoming known outside the Kpop bubble, while Jimin seems to be fading into obscurity.”

“It feels like it's only a matter of time before he does a collaboration with artists like Chris Brown, Justin Bieber, Zayn or Shawn Mendes. And what do you think will happen then? His career will most definitely skyrocket”

I need you to be so serious right now because the incessant pessimism some of y’all have is truly preventing y’all from seeing what’s real.

JK got “featuring” popping up next to his first name more times than his last and his biggest claim to his current relevancy/success is his inability to not latch onto western artists. If that’s what he has to continue to do for his supposed “solo” career to skyrocket why would I stress over that when jimin’s the only one out the two of them that’s proven he can stand on his own? Jk being a serial collaborator means little to me in general but especially when everything that you mentioned is due to the connections that jk has gotten through Scooter. Not off his own ability or initiative.

Referencing that random top kpop list is even more of a joke when you remember jimin (not jk) is still the only k-idol to hit #1 on artists 100. The real one. Not the one made up one by that rent for hire white kpop aficionado Jeff Benjamin. Like Crazy, a korean track has spent more or just as much days on usa spotify than multiple songs that were taylor made for the states, dropped by jk have. SNTY, a song released just this past November, is doing almost the same amount of streams as Like Crazy is and LC is almost a year old. And so what if we praise Jimin for getting that #1 on hot 100? That’s nothing to be embarrassed about. Him getting that #1 is the main reason jk got dragged out that apartment to record seven so scooter could pay to get him his 😭. Plus armys are always gonna be full of it when it comes to recognizing the truth about jk’s career so you taking whatever they say or do to heart is a waste of your time.

Claiming Jimin’s fading into obscurity is objectively a ridiculous statement. Music wise after Angel dropped, Jimin went MIA and people still had his name constantly in their mouths the months following. All it took for him to go viral were 3 dance covers he did on a whim. Probably better promo for him than his own solo debut ever got and he didn’t need Scooter or Bang spending millions to do that. For his ambassadorships, he had people lining up in the streets just to see him walk in and out of a building for just for 5 seconds. It’s been 11 years since he debuted and 8 since BTS really blew up and he’s still the most relevant name in kpop out of hundreds of other idols.

I’ll always get the frustration of jk having it so easy in his solo career over jimin. I’m not blind to the disadvantages he’s facing, but some of y’all really need to stop acting like jimin’s solo career is a lost cause or doomed because of it. It’s getting aggravating now.

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literarynecromancy · 1 year ago

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𝒢𝓇𝒾𝓂𝑜𝒾𝓇𝑒 ❤ He/They/She ❤ Main Blog (Re)Introduction

Quick Overview

Heyo - My name is Grim(oire) and I'm a writer trying to get back into the habit of things! This is just where I'm going to store writing tidbits and maybe even post some of my original stuff on occasion.

(I'm also hoping to make a writing buddy or two so we can bounce ideas and hype each other up - but I'm almost effectively a social hermit so that is rather....hard. 😅)

I'm big on:

Fantasy, Mystery, & Romance as genres to both read & write

Worldbuilding waaay too in-depth

Tropes like Became Their Own Antithesis, Dark Magical Girl, & Jerk w/ a Heart of Gold

Many different fandoms (I grew up in a cinephile household) & their stories

❤️Quick Access to my pieces❤️

--Works In Progress & Tagging System Under Cut--

(Edited 05/23/2024)

All Things Concerning Chaos

An unimaginable evil once sealed away is unleashed upon the world due to the fuck-up of one man and his band of thieves. To make the situation worse, he drags the name of his ex down with him and get her and her daughter into just as much trouble by naming them as conspirators. Given prison collars and a time frame of three years they are tasked with finding this evil and resealing it before their time is up and the collars take their lives. ○Steampunk cities, trains, cults, and witches. All set in a world that takes place post an apocalypse. ○Diverse cast of over 12 notable characters! ○Told over the course of three different novels.

Death Rattle

Business partners Roswell and Necro work on cases involving feral Cryptalters that would take the Law & Order branch ages to figure out. With one of them being a Cryptalter himself and the other using a drug called Witchblood to gain Cryptalter-like powers: they make for a good one-two punch out of problems. But things are starting to heat up in the city. A known gang has gained a new head and working with outsiders to make life hell for the average Cryptalter and Ros and Necro are dragged into all of it fairly quickly. Especially when it seems like family is getting involved. ○Urban fantasy in a world that's trying to change with the times. ○Features characters that have lived rent-free in my and my partner's brains for over a decade. ○First book in a potential series!

The SKC Project (Working Title)

Murderers Will Foreman and Tina Greene meet due to playing the same underground game in which you get points for killing. The winner of this game takes home a disgusting amount of money and there are only two rules: 1) Do not harm other players 2) Do not get caught Unfortunately for them, they are having trouble with both of these rules. ○Will be released for free via AO3 or some other similar way ○Bad people doing very bad things ○Love letter to the early 2000s

Aesthetic Tag - For inspiration or general aesthetic things Haha Tag - For the funnies Resource Tag - for resources Advice Tag - for advice Askbox Games - to send some asks for me That Hopeful Thread - inspirational things to help keep me going Other Writers: Intro - Other writeblr's introductions Other Writers: Writing - Other's writing pieces Other Writers: Cool Shit - Other cool shit about other's projects ATCC: Funny - funny things about or reminding me of ATCC ATCC: About - Things about ATCC ATCC: Helpful - Helpful things for me to use for ATCC

Death Rattle: About - Things about Death Rattle and the world

#writeblr #writblr #writeblr community #creative writing #writers on tumblr

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avelera · 3 months ago

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I think there's 2 things that have kept me from reading IWTV show fanfic and/or QotD-informed Devil's Minion fic, despite the fact I'm really excited to see where the show takes that ship and the fact the Vampire Chronicles used to be my entire personality growing up:

Adjusting to a prose voice for IWTV characters that's not Anne Rice. Thing is, I used to read Vampire Chronicles fic back before it was banned on FFN! But it's been so long, and it's been so forbidden for so long that it feels weird even thinking to go looking for it and, honestly, Anne Rice's prose style is very accessible to fic readers, that it's a little like having your favorite fic writer in a fandom and then it's just :-/ not all that interesting to try to go read the same characters in someone else's voice, let alone sifting through anything less that NYT Bestseller-adjacent levels of prose. Basically, wherever am I going to find either someone who perfectly captures the show voices OR perfectly captures the actual author's fanfic-adjacent voice?

How to say this gently.... fanfic has a tendency to soften certain characters and polish off the rough edges? In particular with Daniel/Armand, I'm really not all that interested in fluff or soft fic or even get together fic at this point since that's nowhere near where they're at in the show. I kinda just want to see them hashing out all the decades of drama between them more than I actually want to see them hook up just yet? Like, I think there's some hints, if you squint, that Old Daniel is attracted to Armand, but if they did have a relationship, hooo boy, holy shit that means Armand (probably) non-consensually wiped Daniel's mind of what might have been one of the most significant relationships and most significant periods in his life. It means he's been living a lie since the goddamn 70s. Like... that's still lightyears away from a "romance" just yet, that's goddamn knock-down, drag-out, screaming fight that needs to happen before Daniel would begin to worry about things like, "Do I find this person attractive? Do I want to be on the same continent with them, let alone in the same room?"

And the thing is, that is the kind of fic I'd be interested in reading for show-version Daniel/Armand! If anyone has a rec for a much rougher, sharper, more conflict-driven taken on Daniel learning that 70's Devil's Minion happened (all except for him getting turned) that actually includes Eric Bogosian's trademark tough talk with Armand and his take-no-shit attitude, I'd love to read it.

But at this point I'm almost afraid to even go look because so much of the fandom stuff I've seen on Tumblr around Daniel/Armand is (understandably! fandom tends to write what is missing from canon!) more established relationship or fluffy or even flirty but like I don't even see them as flirty at this point? Except in the most hostile hate-fucking of manners from Daniel and the most otherworldly disconnected way from Armand where even he can't articulate what he wants (honestly, what does Armand want? Does Armand know what Armand wants?? I think the most appealing thing about Devil's Minion is that Armand seems like he can be his own weird self around Daniel, especially in QotD but it feels almost like baby steps in terms of his actual sense of self??).

Anyway, this has gotten away from me, but tl;dr if anyone has like really really tonally show or book aligned IWTV fanfic they'd like to rec I'm all ears! Even as I'm still immensely, fundamentally weirded out at being able to read Vampire Chronicles fanfic again after 20 years ^^;;

#iwtv #devil's minion #fic rec request #no shade intended towards IWTV fanfic writers I just don't even know where to begin #and I'm worried about seeing stuff that's so OOC that it turns me off from the fandom idk #i don't want wish fulfillment yet I want show continuation in tone?

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palmtreehero · 1 month ago

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Hi!

I don’t know if you’ll even see this or if you’ll even remember what I’m about to tell you, but I want to say it anyway.

Almost a decade ago, before I even had this alias, i emailed you one day because I’d seen one of your kagepro arts on deviantart. I loved it so much that I wanted a copy of it for myself, and I asked you in that email if I could have your permission to print a copy.

I was very surprised and elated when you said yes. Perhaps it was more than you actually envisioned me doing or wanted me to do, but I downloaded it onto a flash drive and went to the local Walgreens where, for the price of a 6x6 photo, I printed a copy on photo stock and put it on the wall in my house.

When I moved, all of my fanart had to come down and many of it could not be put back up in my new, smaller place, so I had to be very selective, based on my interests at the time, with what I could display.

In the wake of Kagepro Day, however, one of my good friends has fallen deep into kagepro and has dragged me back into the fandom with them. In short order, I pulled out the stack of unposted fanart and found, to my joy, that very same print still in there.

On the back I had written your socials so that I would remember who the talented and kind artist was, and the information I wrote down all those years ago has led me here today.

All I wanted to tell you is, nearly 10 years later, I still think very fondly of you and that I get to see your artwork daily once more.

I just want to say I'm so stunned?? I can't believe I missed this, I've been away from tumblr for a really long time but I'm so glad I decided to look at my messages now and ?? ?? I'm so speechless and just so incredibly happy…!!!!! This message means so much to me. You have no idea how much you have made my day.

I can't articulate into words how meaningful it is that something I had made over a decade ago could still be valued by someone. Thank you for taking care of my art, and for taking the time to make a note and remember me. I think so many artists out there get discouraged because we're treated as just some content-making machine and so many of us are being erased by such things now that generative AI is so prevalent… but I don't think this kind of connection could ever be replicated by something as soulless as that.

Thank you so much for sending me this message. I still can't believe I didn't see this until now. I apologize for taking so long to get back to you and I'm very honored that my art is being displayed so thoughtfully in your home ;v;

#reply

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stupendousfoxthing · 5 months ago

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The way you shippers get defensive when someone points out the inconsistencies in your logic and narratives should be studied because why are you getting so defensive? I didn’t send you an ask in bad faith and I certainly wasn’t trying to save you from shipping either but as a blogger when you put out certain information and open your inbox for people to send asks, shouldn’t you be ready to get asks that disagree with some things you say? I was honestly just trying to hear what you thought about the ever changing narratives because i noticed that you are one of the more non delulu tkk blogs on tumblr but you got so defensive and even a little insulting for what? Is your ego so big that you can’t handle people challenging your beliefs or questioning your logic? I wasn’t planning on dragging this topic because I honestly just wanted to get your take on one thing but let me see how many things you can disagree on or how many more insults you have in you. Ofcourse you can choose not to post it, it all up to you.

“I've been in the fandom for almost a decade, and a Taekooker since 2016, I promise you they did not just become a thing in 2023”

Ofcourse taekook didn’t just become a thing in chap 2 and neither did all the other numerous ships we have in BTS. They all didn’t start now but the fact that a ship has always existed and seems to get more attention at a certain time doesn’t mean that ship is real. I have seen tkkrs argue that taekook is one of the OG ships so that means something. Yes, it means that people were able to spot their closeness and bond very easily because of how obvious it was but that doesn’t mean that bond and closeness remained exactly the same through out the span of 10 years and that certainly doesn’t mean the ship is real. How long a ship has existed doesn’t determine if the ship is real or not.

“Meanwhile, despite that previous anon going ass over tit trying to make it look like it was Taekookers narrative that changed, it didn't. At all”

Tkkrs, or most tkkrs narratives changed and it will continue to change. If you don’t know that it did you are either not very aware of what most tkkrs say or you are lying. Are you trying to tell me that tkkrs didn’t go back to, “the company is separating them and forcing Jk not to mention Tae” after the Taennie incident? Before this, tkkrs said taekook were finally free and they could be themselves but after taennie what did tkkrs say? I have literally seen tkkrs send asks to tk blogs commenting abt the increase in tk content. What were the narratives when most tkkrs felt like they didn’t get enough tk content? It is beyond ridiculous to claim that tkkrs narratives didn’t change when all you need to do to know that this isn’t true is to visit some of the biggest tkkr accts on twitter and search their tweets from the era before chapter two. I am aware that tkkrs are not monolith but you can get an idea of how much a narrative is accepted within a fandom by how most of them react to it can’t you? Ofcourse there will always be those who don’t agree with the narratives but from my observation, majority of tkkrs did. I have noticed that the tkk community on tumblr is a non toxic one but don’t think that just because few of you on tumblr aren’t negative, the rest of the tkkr community isn’t because you need to visit twitter, instagram, tiktok and facebook to see what tkkrs there do and say.

“For people who thought Taekook weren't close until they were very close in 2023, the cognitive dissonance has got to be louder than a jet engine. “

Are you trying to say that after all the years of BTS being together you don’t think some of their dynamics changed over time? You don’t think some members at certain points grew closer while others grew more distant? Just because taekook seemed visibly closer in chapter two doesn’t mean they didn’t go through periods where they grew a little distant. That is perfectly normal in every relationship whether you like to accept it or not and maybe if some of you took off your shipping lenses for a moment, you would be able to see things a little more clearly. People didn’t just start thinking Taekook weren’t close out of thin air. People started thinking they weren’t close because they gave people the impression that they had grown a little distant and this impression was further strengthened by them barely been seen together and a very visible shift in their dynamic which even taekookers noticed at the time and complained about or are you also about to tell me that tkkrs didn’t complain about something feeling off with taekook and then convinced themselves that the reason for that was because the company was keeping them apart? Will you say this didn’t happen too?

“But the truth is that when the group was given the freedom to go their separate ways after a decade, freedom to pursue their lives and goals as individuals, Taekook remained at each other's side. In the way we always believed them to be.”

This is where you lose me because there was never a time when members were required to spend time with each other except when working and if you believe anything contrary to this, you are too far gone. Even while living together in the dorm, they were not required to spend off time with each other if they didn’t want to were they? Have there not been a few instances where Tae mentioned that he didn’t know Jungkook’s rooms while they were on tour? Would you say the company also forced them apart them or hid them? We are also talking about members who moved out of the dorm in 2019 and were free to spend time with who they chose outside of work because they weren’t bound together by the same living area again but taekook still didn’t seem to spend time together did they? They had a break in 2019 but taekook didn’t see each other at all did they? I mentioned other moments like on birthdays where they also mentioned not seeing each other to celebrate with each other and you said it is jkkrs narrative, well I don’t know what jkkrs say about that, I am speaking based on the information we all got from the members themselves or are you saying that if we search we wouldn’t be able to find things like that which they said? The only difference btwn chap 1 and chap 2 is that they didn’t have to do group activities anymore and see each other frequently at work. They temporarily dispersed but only as a group at that time because they had already dispersed individually way before chapter two as they didn’t live together anymore. It’s not like they were given any extra freedom they weren’t allowed before. It is beyond ridiculous that these are the narratives you have to cling to inorder for things to make sense. Do you think that before chap 2 the boys were held prisoner and forced to only spend time with certain members? So what do you mean they were given freedom as if they were all locked up together before? Yes they had freedom to do solo activities for the first time and not only work as a group but this freedom had nothing to do with who they choose to spend their time outside of work with. If your narratives were true, then yes we probably wouldn’t have seen much of taekook on official content since some tkkrs claim they were edited out of official content but we would have seen or heard about them hanging out in their free time like we did in chap two wouldn’t we? Instead didn’t we constantly hear of or see them both choosing to constantly spend time with other people? Tae mostly with wooga squad, Bogum and some other friends and Jk with members like Hobi, Jm and his 97 line friends and then taekook confirming themselves that they didn’t see each other or spend time together? During their break didn’t Tae choose to travel with his wooga squad and didn’t see any of the other members for the entire break, while Jk hung out with his friends (wasn’t that when we got the mijoo scandal?) and also with members like jihope? When they had some time off in 2017 didn’t Tae travel with his family and Bogum and Jk with Jimin? After PTD in LA didn’t Tae travel with his family and Hobi’s to Hawaii to vacation there while Jk went back to korea? These are instances where they had free time and choose to be with other people instead of each other over the years but you say they prioritized each other in chapter two? You keep saying taekook spent time together but then you show a twitter post from the time when all members were still living together and the other proof you have are noises in the background of lives or sightings with no proof whatsoever. Didn’t taekook themselves make it clear that they weren’t involved in each other’s lives as much? Is this a lie too?

Now you say that in the one moment where they were free to do their own things they choose each other. This would have made sense if all the members were deep in schedules or free at the same time but taekook still made time exclusively for each other but this wasn’t the case was it? You cannot say people choose each other or made time only for each other when everyone else pretty much wasn’t available because of work and they were the only ones who had some free time to hang. Isn’t it instead an issue that at the moment when all the members schedule aligned and they were still together as a group but living separately Taekook didn’t spend time together but only did when only their schedules kind of aligned out of everyone else’s? It’s just like saying that two people made time to be together just because they were the only two left at home while everyone else had to go out to work. If we saw other members constantly hanging out in different pairs and taekook with each other then ok, that would have made sense but other members didn’t do that and we know for a fact that all of them were busy. Taekook are friends so they can hang out when they want to and also in their free time but your narrative that they prioritized each other over anyone else just because they hung out the most just isn’t true. This narrative would have also made more sense if taekook kept up with the constant hang outs even after they both got busy with their own individual stuff and Jk stopped being a couch potato but they didn’t did they? When taekook hung out alot we could tell because of the knowledge they both had of each other and also the fact that Jk shared 7 first with Tae but it was obvious to anyone who isn’t biased that it wasn’t the same after they both got busy with their own stuff. When Jk made 3D, RM and Yoongi heard it first, Jk didn’t know if Tae’s album had been announced already, Tae didn’t know about the process of Jk’s album and Jk himself said he didn’t know where Tae was and that he didn’t keep up with the members all the time. This was very different from taekook at the beginning of the year who had alot of knowledge about each other because they hung out alot in their free time don’t you think? If all the members were extremely busy at the same time including taekook and they both still made time to be with each other, then I would have seen your point but right now, you are the one not looking at things from every angle. You are only paying attention to the angle that favors your argument.

“ It was not work, it was not any other obligation that kept them together during that time. _Their_ time.”

Someone hearing you say this will think that taekook both did everything in their power amidst busy schedules and loads of work, jumped through hoops to make sure they spent time together. They wouldn’t believe this happened when Jungkook had nothing doing and used to spend 6 days in a row at home doing nothing. Ofcourse it wasn’t work or any other obligation that kept them together at that time, it was their friendship and the fact that they had time on their hands to spend with each other like normal friends do. None of the other members need work or any other obligation to be with each other. They spend time with each other when they can and when they want and other times they spend time with other people in their lives and as Jk said, don’t keep up with each other all the time. Just because it is in the past you are trying to act like taekook have always spent time together when there is more than enough evidence showing that they didn’t at some point and not only because we didn’t see it but because they said so themselves but I guess we should continue arguing with them about things they said while continuing to believe that the sounds in the back of their livestreams or made up sightings with no proof are proof enough that they spent time together.

The way you shippers get defensive when someone points out the inconsistencies in your logic and narratives should be studied because why are you getting so defensive?

You asking the questions and me answering puts me in the defensive position by default. This is just another example of how all of your asks have been in bad faith. You send me something you want a response to, and when I respond I'm "defensive". In the most literal sense I am in the defensive position here. Do you see how that works? You didn't point out inconsistencies in my logic and narratives, because the logic and narratives you asked about aren't even mine.

I didn’t send you an ask in bad faith and I certainly wasn’t trying to save you from shipping either but as a blogger when you put out certain information and open your inbox for people to send asks, shouldn’t you be ready to get asks that disagree with some things you say?

So you do know how this works. You did send me three asks in bad faith. I explained why. There's multiple reasons these arguments you brought here are bad faith ones. If you weren't trying to save me, you were trying to save other "delulu" Taekookers and you can start your own blog for that if you want.

I was honestly just trying to hear what you thought about the ever changing narratives because i noticed that you are one of the more non delulu tkk blogs on tumblr but you got so defensive and even a little insulting for what? Is your ego so big that you can’t handle people challenging your beliefs or questioning your logic?

And the "changing narratives" you asked about were things that you had twisted them into yourself. Narratives that were never mine, that had no logic, and that I'd never seen anywhere. Narratives like "Taekook are real because they're never seen together". You even had to backtrack because you know that was absolute bullshit that no one had ever argued.

🤦‍♀️

I had to post your starting "point" in its entirety because oh my god, we have gotten nowhere. No one said, and I certainly didn't, that how long a ship has existed or how much attention it gets is what makes it real. You're starting off again with some twisted logic that makes no sense and trying to act like that's my or other Taekookers' position. This is crazy. I talked about the fact that I've been a Taekooker since 2016 to establish that I've been here for a while and my narratives haven't changed, and that specifically the Jokers' new fave talking point that Taekook weren't close until 2023 is false. You want to talk about changing narratives but I can't say "I've been here since 2016 and my narrative hasn't changed?" I'm not saying that to argue for the validity of the ship itself. You seem to have some sort of reading comprehension issue and it's tiresome to have to answer to absolute bullshit like this.

No they didn't. So I either agree with you or I'm a liar now? 😂 The only "narratives" I had during this time period is that Tae got way bolder in his queer expression, and that they were busy as hell and had very successful solo debuts, but that Taekook stayed Taekooking. Jungkook talked about Tae before and after the "Taennie incident". How would the company even separate them in solo era? They clearly didn't. After the "Taennie incident" we saw them at Yoongi's concert and they arrived, watched, and left together. They wore the matching Sweetheart shirts, Tae supported JK at Inkigayo. 😭 Whatever narrative switch you're talking about once again was not mine.

Before this, tkkrs said taekook were finally free and they could be themselves but after taennie what did tkkrs say?

Free to what? Come out? You use these no nuance set-ups to try to make everything a gotcha and you fail miserably. No one expected them to be free to come out or that risks didn't continue even after the group went on hiatus. Taekook were exactly as free to be themselves as far as their relationship is concerned before and after, which is what you're talking about.

I have literally seen tkkrs send asks to tk blogs commenting abt the increase in tk content. What were the narratives when most tkkrs felt like they didn’t get enough tk content?

What. What Taekook content? Do you consider all of the solo era outings and moments as...content? I don't know about you, but "content" to me is official releases from the company. There was no marked increase in Taekook "content", and if you want to argue with me about my position on that go read my first response to you and the "drought" I called overexaggerated. I'm done with you after this, but it would have been great if you had considered even a single thing I actually said before coming into my inbox with your third essay.

I have noticed that the tkk community on tumblr is a non toxic one but don’t think that just because few of you on tumblr aren’t negative, the rest of the tkkr community isn’t because you need to visit twitter, instagram, tiktok and facebook to see what tkkrs there do and say

Do you think I live here? 😂 I'm well aware of the toxic mess on Twitter where I have over 100k accounts blocked. Instagram is a cesspool. I don't know why you think I'm interested in answering for the positions of some of the worst and dumbest people in the community when I place no value on what they have to say myself. Go ask them. If you're trying to use that to point out inconsistencies in MY narratives and logic, you can understand why we have a problem here.

Where did I say that. I'm 42 years old, I'm well aware of how things change. That's not what you asked me about and you kind of just shot your own argument in the foot here. People changing over time, circumstances changing, is not the "narrative" changing. Do you know what a narrative is. It's a story of connected events. Over time. Through changes in people and circumstances. Do you get how those changes can happen within the narrative? If you can't grasp that that might be the core problem here.

People didn’t just start thinking Taekook weren’t close out of thin air. People started thinking they weren’t close because they gave people the impression that they had grown a little distant and this impression was further strengthened by them barely been seen together and a very visible shift in their dynamic which even taekookers noticed at the time and complained about or are you also about to tell me that tkkrs didn’t complain about something feeling off with taekook and then convinced themselves that the reason for that was because the company was keeping them apart?

Once again, I do not care what other Taekookers complain about. I have zero complaints. A Taekooker who is "complaining" about Taekook is the kind of person that would get an instant block from me and over 100k people on Twitter have.

I didn't lose you, we were never on the same page. And you did not get the point I was making about them working and living together. They were required to spend time together working, nowhere did I say that working and living together forces a relationship to happen. You came at me with, the point you backtracked on, that Taekook were never seen together. I was saying there is no point in trying to argue that Taekook did not spend enough time together in chapter 1. You can try to break it down and say "But they didn't spend THIS day together", but as I also said that is not what I do. I don't know their day-to-day and I don't need to. There is a ton of their time unaccounted for. What I believe is the narrative that has emerged for me when looking at all of the connected events over the years. That's it.

The rest of your essay goes on the exact same way and I'm tired, but I'll post with my added notes. I don't think responding to all of this will accomplish much, because I can see that you are going in circles with the same "logic" while missing the basic point of these three attempts I've given to answering. I'm not blocking right now but if I find myself in the mood to answer you again I'm doing it with this essay. This is plenty. You send me more of the same, I'm deleting it.

#asks #taekook

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anxious-witch · 11 months ago

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What a year, huh? We all know I have to be emotional on tumblr.com whenever the opportunity arises because that's one way I allow myself to have an emotional catharsis (for legal reasons this a joke)

In all seriousness though, this year has been a lot for me. Both in a good and bad sense, but Käärijä and Joker Out improved it significantly. And more importantly, their fandoms. (More inder the cut bc this is long af)

I have never really been someone who knows anything about the artists' whose music I listened to. Before this, I don't think I ever listened to a full album of someone, just random songs that I liked. Finding stuff from personal life of bands/musicians I liked usually made me depressed so I didn't bother.

Then, ESC 2023. happened. I frankly have no idea what flipped the switch in my head. Bojere interactions? The way people on tumblr were so welcoming even back when I was mostly posting about Let 3 and Käärijä only? I don't know, I only know that we are here now, regardless.

Another thing about me is that I used to be very pessimistic person. Likez genuinely. I have been "unofficially"(long story) diagnosed with depression and anxiety since I was 11, which is over a decade now. I always had a lot of bad experiences with people and really awful trust issues. I have been doing better for some time now, but it is very hard to let go of the feeling of pessimism and helplessness. In a world where awful things happen every second, what can I possibly do that would change anything?

Then ESC happened. Käärijä lost and I thought "another injustice that will never be corrected". Except, instead of feeling defeated, everyone just loved him more. In those weeks after and later on months, all I have seen had been unrelenting love and acceptance of Jere. Reminding him that despite not winning Eurovision, he is our winner and we'll forever think of him as such. Jere who has a wonderfully belly and strong thighs and is short and by no means is he conventional in any sense. And people loved him not despite all that but because all that. Because we all found ways to relate to him, or to what he went through.

His story of almost dying and still getting where he did only served to highlight that more. Because of he did it, why can't we get to what we want? Why can't I? It shifted my whole perspective.

Then, Joker Out. It is so, so funny to me how I barely paid any attention to them during ESC, except for bojere interactions and was dragged in it by the shared fandom, when now I post most about them.

But yes, JO. A band from Slovenia that while tehnically isn't Balkan, felt so close to me. Like they could understand all the things I kept to myself because of where I was. And then they showed me there is still hope.

I have never seen a band from around here take a pride flag on the stage. Never. I know it's a thing, especially abroad, but God I have never seen that happen here. And with how much love they always took it! That's...wow. It gave me hope that not only is it possible for injustices to be corrected, but that ot's possible to do it even in the environment I'm in.

And then...the Virtual Letters Project happened. Or well positive confessions that @spockowhales turned into Virtual Letters Project.

That's when I knew it's truly possible. I have seen tumblr posts, yes. But getting stuff so directly addressed about or to JO made me realize how much of a "wave" they all created. So many people said they helped them with their depression, with viewing their world differentky with meeting new peoplez with daring to do something new.

I have no words to describe how much that meant to me and I really hope that when they read those letters, they understood the impact they had.

But even that aside, I want to thank everyone in this fandom. People I have talked to, people I have interacted with it any way, through replies, reblogs, likes, anon asks. I appreciate every single one of you for helping create such a wonderful space. We had our ups and downs in the fandom, but we are all here because we love these fandoms, these people so much to keep talking about it even months after.

Thank you and I wish everyone here a wonderful New Year with even more laugh, love and positivity ❤️ have a good one

#rio rambles #käärijä #joker out #man this is so long but I couldn't stop myself #rio writes a love letter to jere JO and the fandom in general I guess lmao

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starspray · 2 years ago

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Power & Desire: The Silmarils vs The One Ring

Can also be read on the Silmarillion Writers’ Guild

Every so often I see discussions in fandom about the Silmarils and the One Ring that end up equating them—treating them as though they are direct parallels to one another. This always happens by way of bringing the Silmarils down to the level of the Ring, often treating characters’ refusal to surrender the one Beren and Lúthien retrieved as the result of the same kind of corrosive possessiveness that the Ring induces, which renders its bearer literally unable to give it up willingly or destroy it.* This reading is not just wrong, it undermines the agency of the characters involved and undercuts the tragedy of The Silmarillion. The Silmarils and the One Ring are made by very different characters for very different purposes. They also act in the narratives of their respective stories very differently.

What do the Silmarils and the Ring have in common? They are both the titular objects of their respective books around which the major plot turns, it is true. They are both made by powerful individuals, and are desired by many different people, and when they are lost and/or stolen their makers are desperate to retrieve them. Characters die for them, and kill for them. At this extremely surface level reading they do, indeed, seem very similar. But the deeper you look at each object the more glaring differences show themselves, until you realize that they do not parallel, but rather oppose each other.

Due to the nature of each narrative it’s much easier to see the full nature of the Ring and the effect it has on people around it. It is an object created explicitly for evil and malicious purposes: One Ring to rule them all, and in the darkness bind them. Sauron makes it so that he can ensnare all others who hold rings of power, “for he made that Ring himself, it is his, and he let a great part of his own former power pass into it, so that he could rule all the others. If he recovers it, then he will command them all again, wherever they be, even the Three…”

The way the Ring works is that it sneaks into the bearer’s mind and starts to twist their thoughts to its own purposes. It wants to be used, and it wants to isolate its bearer. It makes itself desirable so that its bearer will do all kinds of mental gymnastics to justify the means by which to take and keep it. See Gollum’s insistence on his “birthday present.” See Bilbo’s tale of winning it in the riddle game. At the Council of Elrond he says: “But I will now tell the true story, and if some here have heard me tell it otherwise”—he looked slidelong at Glóin—“I ask them to forget it and forgive me. I only wished to claim the treasure as my very own in those days, and to be rid of the name of thief that was put on me. But perhaps I understand things a little better now” (emphasis mine).

You can see it in Isildur, too. The films misrepresent this scene: Elrond says nothing of dragging Isildur up Mount Doom to try to get him to destroy the Ring; he says that “whether we would or no, he took it to treasure it” but at that time there is no way anyone present could know what kind of effect the Ring would have on someone other than Sauron, because Isildur is the first person after Sauron to hold it. But Elrond telling the story has the benefit of Gandalf’s recent decades of research, and the reader also can see the red flags popping up almost as soon as Isildur touches it. He “will have [the Ring] as weregild for my father, and my brother” he claims, which is a similar kind of justification to Bilbo’s story of winning the Ring instead of finding it. Weregild is, per dictionary.com: a term used in Anglo-Saxon and other Germanic countries for “money paid to the relatives of a murder victim in compensation for loss and to prevent a blood feud.” It’s something paid to prevent further bloodshed. It would have been weregild if Sauron had handed it over after Anárion had died, as part of some kind of peace brokerage. But it can’t be weregild if you’re taking it off the dead body of your enemy; it’s too late by then. Isildur does have every right to it as a spoil of war, and no one disputes that right. But the fact that Isildur has to change it and further justify it even in his own mind is a sign that the Ring is already working on him. And if that is not enough (which it might not be—weregild is a very archaic term), Tolkien further illustrates the effects of the Ring taking hold on Isildur in the document that Gandalf discovers in Minas Tirith’s archives: “But for my part I will risk no hurt to this thing: of all the words of Sauron the only fair. It is precious to me, though I buy it with great pain.”

This effect of the Ring is not something that can be defeated easily. Only twice is it given up willingly: once by Bilbo, who needs all of the help Gandalf can give him, and once by Sam, who has born it for a very short time—and even then “Sam felt reluctant to give up the Ring and burden his master with it again.” There you see another justification—perfectly in character for Sam to want to spare Frodo, but also a thought that the Ring can latch onto and use, to twist for its own purposes.

And though Sam is able to return it to Frodo with relative ease, he tries to compromise: “If it’s too hard a job, I could share it with you, maybe?”

Frodo’s reaction illustrates just how far gone he is—made more tragic by his awareness of it:

“‘No, no!’ cried Frodo, snatching the Ring and chain from Sam’s hands. ‘No you won’t, you thief!’ He panted, staring at Sam with eyes wide with fear and enmity. Then suddenly, clasping the Ring in one clenched fist, he stood aghast. A mist seem to clear form his eyes, and he passed a hand over his aching brow. The hideous vision had seemed so real to him, half bemused as he was still with wound and fear. Sam had changed before his very eyes into an orc gain, leering and pawing at his treasure, a foul little creature with greedy eyes and slobbering mouth. But now the vision had passed. There was Sam kneeling before him, his face wrung with pain, as if he had been stabbed in the heart; tears welled from his eyes.

“‘O Sam!’ cried Frodo. ‘What have I said? What have I done? Forgive me! After all you have done. It is the horrible power of the Ring. I wish it had never, never, been found. But don’t mind me, Sam. I must carry the burden to the end. It can’t be altered. You can’t com between me and this doom.’”

And that is only looking at what it does to people who possess it. Saruman never comes near it, but the mere desire twists him from someone noble and wise and good into a miniature Sauron. Boromir also falls—he is a good man, an honorable and brave and ambitious man desperate to protect his home, and the Ring takes that and twists it until Boromir breaks and attacks Frodo. The Ring is a thing made with evil and malicious intentions, for explicitly evil purposes, and it cannot be taken and used for good—in fact it will take even the best of intentions and twist them to evil. Gandalf knows this, and that is why when Frodo asks if he will take the Ring his response is immediate and vehement:

‘No!’ cried Gandalf, springing to his feet. ‘With that power I should have power too great and terrible. And over me the Ring would gain a power still greater and more deadly.’ His eyes flashed and his face was lit as by a fire within. ‘Do not tempt me! For I do not wish to become like the Dark Lord himself. Yet the way of the Ring to my heart is by pity, pity for weakness and the desire of strength to do good. Do not tempt me! I dare not take it, not even to keep it safe, unused. The wish to wield it would be too great for my strength. I shall have such need of it.’

And Galadriel has a similar response when Frodo offers it to her. There is of course her famous description of what she would become were she to take it, but then Sam says to her:

‘But if you’ll pardon my speaking out, I think my master was right. I wish you’d take his Ring. You’d put things to rights. You’d stop them digging up the gaffer and turning him adrift. You’d make some folk pay for their dirty work.’

‘I would,’ she said. ‘That is how it would begin. But it would not stop with that, alas! We will not speak more of it.’

That is why the plot of The Lord of the Rings centers around the Ring’s destruction. Everything else—the battles, the politics, the power struggles, Aragorn’s rise to kingship—all of it is secondary. And the Ring itself is an active player. I will not go so far as to claim it has sentience, or any kind of active thought, but there is a significant part of Sauron’s will and his power held within it, and there is a drive to be found and kept and used—and ultimately to return to its maker.

The Silmarils, on the other hand, are the greatest creation of Fëanor at the height of his powers in Valinor:

For Fëanor, being come to his full might, was filled with a new thought, or it may be that some shadow of foreknowledge came to him of the doom that drew near; and he pondered how the light of the Trees, the glory of the Blessed Realm, might be preserved imperishable. Then he began a long and secret labor, and he summoned all his lore, and his power, and his subtle skill; and at the end of all he made the Silmarils.

As three great jewels they were in form. But not until the End, when Fëanor shall return who perished ere the Sun was made … shall it be known of what substance they were made. Like the crystal of diamonds it appeared, and yet was more strong than adamant, so that no violence could mar it or break it within the Kingdom of Arda. Yet that crystal was to the Silmarils but as is the body to the Children of Ilúvatar: the house of its inner fire, that is within it and yet in all parts of it, and is its life. And the inner fire of the Silmarils Fëanor made of the blended light of the Trees of Valinor, which lives in them yet, though the Trees have long withered and shine no more.

Fëanor’s motives in making the Silmarils are not wholly clear—whether he had some foresight of the death of the Trees, or whether he just wanted to see if he could do it, or to show off his skills, or what. But whatever his motive is, it is not to enthrall or ensnare anyone. On the contrary—while the Ring seeks to isolate its bearer, the Silmarils, though “even in the darkness of the deepest treasury [they] of their own radiance shone like the stars of Varda; and yet, as were they indeed living things, they rejoiced in light and received it and gave it back in hues more marvelous than before.” They are at their most beautiful when out in the light, where they are most likely to be seen and enjoyed by everyone.

They are then hallowed by Varda. To hallow a thing is to to make it holy, and in the case of the Silmarils it also means that “thereafter no moral flesh, nor hands unclean, nor anything of evil will might touch them, but it was scorched and withered”. The mortal flesh bit is contradicted later when Beren handles one with seemingly no issue, but Beren is an exception to many rules, and what remains consistent is that nothing “of evil will” can touch the Silmarils and come away unharmed.

Like the One Ring, the entire plot of The Silmarillion is the great desire of various characters for the Silmarils. This begins with Melkor, whose lust for them inflames his desire to destroy Fëanor, and the friendship between the Valar and the Elves. But this should come as no surprise to the reader; Melkor has historically lusted after sources of power and Light, going often into the Void in search of the Flame Imperishable. The Silmarils themselves are not doing anything to Melkor; they are the objects of his desires, but not the source.

This pattern continues throughout the The Silmarillion. Fëanor and his sons swear their famous Oath, but the Silmarils don’t make them do it. Then Thingol tells Beren that he must retrieve a Silmaril before he can marry Lúthien, he is setting what seems to everyone present to be an impossible goal, especially after the Dagor Bragollach and the breaking of the Siege of Angband. I’m not saying that Thingol does not actually want a Silmaril; he is very happy to have it once he gets it, but it’s a very different desire from the kind inspired by the Ring much later. Then someone is the bearer of the One Ring, the last thing they want to do is give it up, as discussed above. But the Silmaril that Beren and Lúthien retrieve from Morgoth is passed around without any issue through many different hands. Nowhere is it even implied that Elwing, for example, has trouble giving it to Eärendil to take to the Valar, or to take with him when he sets sail in Vingilot.

Thingol’s desire for the Silmaril I mentioned above; it comes closest to mirroring the kind of obsession triggered by the Ring, but it is not the same. Although “as the years passed Thingol’s thought turned unceasingly to the jewel of Fëanor, and became bound to it,” which sounds a lot like Ring-esque obsession, it does not drive him to isolate himself, or to keep the Silmaril hidden away where only he can see or find it, the way Bilbo keeps the Ring in his pocket and never takes it out when others can see it. Thingol does become “minded now to bear it with him always, waking and sleeping,” but by its very nature that can’t be done secretly. There is also no use to the Silmaril the way there is to the Ring—it cannot turn one invisible, and it does not give one power over others. The Silmarils have a power—more on that later—but it’s of a very different kind.

An explanation can be found for Thingol’s obsession through a study of his character arc and his relationship with Valinor and the Trees (which is another essay unto itself). Thingol, along with Ingwë and Finwë, goes to Valinor as an ambassador, and when they return to Cuiviénen there is nothing in the text to indicate that he is more or less enthusiastic than his companions to convince the Eldar to go to dwell with the Valar, and he in fact leads the largest faction of the Eldar over Middle-earth on the Great Journey. It is only by chance (if chance you call it) that he stumbles upon Melian in Nan Elmoth, where “a spell was laid on him, so that they stood thus while long years were measured by the wheeling stars above them; and the trees of Nan Elmoth grew tall and dark before they spoke any word.” Famously, they remain lost in Nan Elmoth so long that Ulmo comes back to get the Teleri that have lingered to search for him, and under Olwë many of them depart, and those that remain give up the chance to get to Valinor—and that includes Thingol when he finally returns to them. Thingol does not choose to remain behind; he gets left behind. And when The Silmarillion speaks of Thingol’s desire to go to Valinor, it specifically says that it is the light of the Trees that he desires: “Greatly though he had desired to see again the light of the Trees, in the face of Melian he beheld the light of Aman as in an unclouded mirror, and in that light he was content.”

Fast forward to the Flight of the Noldor, and Thingol learns that Morgoth has destroyed the Trees (and murdered his friend Finwë), so that even if he were to reach Valinor, their light is gone forever. Fast forward to the Dagor Bragollach, and the Siege of Angband has broken and Beleriand is swiftly growing ever more dark and dangerous as the power of Morgoth grows. Then Beren comes, and the Quest happens, and now Thingol has a Silmaril. He no longer has to be content with the reflected light of Aman in Melian’s face, however unclouded a mirror it may be. Now he has the real thing, a real piece of Laurelin and Telperion at Mingling. Of course it might become an obsession.

Less readily explainable is the Dwarves’ decision to insist upon the Silmaril and the Nauglamír as payment, when Thingol commissions them to combine the two. They have been coming and going between their mountain halls and Menegroth for many generations by now, and there is no mention of any kind of prior dispute over payment—certainly not one that results in bloodshed. Yet when Thingol goes to take up the finished Nauglamír they “in that moment withheld it from him, and demanded that he yield it up to them, saying: ‘By what right does the Elvenking lay claim to the Nauglamír, that was made by our fathers for Finrod Felagund who is dead? It has come to him but by the hand of Húrin the Man of Dor-lómin, who took it as a thief out of the darkness of Nargothrond.’”

This does sound rather like the Ring-induced desires we see in The Lord of the Rings, although the Dwarves do not mention the Silmaril. It is Thingol who decides that that is what they want—whether he is correct in this assessment is, in my opinion, debatable. There is another form of treasure that warps people’s minds and desires—dragon gold. And the Nauglamír has just come from Nargothrond, that was for several years under the control of Glaurung. I have thus far only cited the published Silmarillion but at this point I do want to point out that in a previous draft of Thingol’s demise, the gold that Húrin brings to Thingol is, explicitly, cursed.

In the draft of the Quenta Noldorinwa found in The Shaping of Middle-earth Húrin and a few outlaws arrive at Nargothrond “which as yet none, Orc, Elf, or Man, had dared to plunder, for dread of the spirit of Glómund [Glaurung] and his very memory.” There they find the dwarf Mîm, who has come to Nargothrond and “bound [the treasure] to himself with many spells.” Húrin’s companions kill Mîm, “and at his death Mîm cursed the gold.”

This is the gold that, in this version of the story, Húrin takes to throw at Thingol’s feet, and it is this gold that Thingol then summons the Dwarves to make into the Nauglamír in which to hang the Silmaril. The text in this version is extremely explicit about the hold that the cursed gold takes over Thingol and also over the Dwarves who come to work with it. “Yet also they [the Dwarves] lusted for the Silmaril,” is added almost as an afterthought.

In the published Silmarillion there is no explicit curse, though the description of Nargothrond when Húrin comes to it is almost exactly the same as the earlier Quenta, and if one is familiar with The Hobbit, one might remember what else Tolkien has written about dragon hoards. When Bilbo witnesses Thorin’s dealing with Bard after Smaug is slain, the narrator says that “also he did not reckon with the power that gold has upon which a dragon has long brooded … Long hours in the past days Thorin had spent in the treasury, and the lust of it was heavy on him.” This is commonly called the dragon-sickness; its effects are varied in The Hobbit, affecting some more strongly than others—such as Thorin, and also the Master of Lake-town, who “being of the kind that easily catches such disease he fell under the dragon-sickness and took most of the gold and fled with it, and died of starvation in the Waste.”

One can thus infer that both Thingol and the Dwarves of Nogrod are also susceptible to the dragon-sickness, and also to fatal amounts of pride. This puts some of the blame on the Nauglamír, but still none at all on the Silmaril.

None of this is to say that the Silmarils are not desirable. The entire plot of The Silmarillion hinges on their desirability. But in this they are passive objects, unlike the Ring that actively seeks to ensnare new bearers whenever it can. What power lies in the Silmarils lies in the light of the Trees that lives inside them, and that light was made by Yavanna, and is holy and life-giving. The people of Sirion believe that “in the Silmaril lay the healing and the blessing that had come upon their houses and their ships,” and that seems to play a much larger part in their refusal to surrender the Silmaril to Maedhros than the fact that it is an heirloom of Lúthien and Dior. Considering the state of the rest of Beleriand at this time, there seems to be some truth to that belief. It is with the Silmaril also that Eärendil and Elwing are able at last to pass through the barriers around Valinor and come to the shores of Eldamar.

And, much later, it is the light of that Silmaril that Galadriel captures in the phial she gifts to Frodo, and though that phial might be considered as much a reflection of the light of Aman as lives in Melian’s face, there is real tangible power in it—power that works against that of the Ring (and the Witch-king) in the Morgul Vale as the Witch-king and his armies pass by:

There was no longer any answer to that command in his own will, dismayed by terror though it was, and he felt only the beating upon him of a great power from outside. It took his hand, and as Frodo watched with his mind, not willing it but in suspense (as if he looked on some old story far away), it moved the hand inch by inch towards the chain upon his neck. Then his own will stirred; slowly it forced the hand back and set it to find another thing, a thing lying hidden near his breast. Cold and hard it seemed as his grip closed on it: the phial of Galadriel, so long treasured, and almost forgotten till that hour. As he touched it, for a while all thought of the Ring was banished from his mind. He sighed and bent his head.

Later in Shelob’s lair Frodo brings the phial out, and

for a moment it glimmered, faint s a rising star struggling in heavy earthward mists, and then as its power waxed, and hope grew in Frodo’s mind, it began to burn, and kindled to a silver flame, a minute heart of dazzling light, as though Eärendil had himself come down from the high sunset paths with the last Silmaril upon his brow. The darkness receded from it, until ti seemed to shine in the center of a globe of airy crystal, and the hand that held it sparkled with white fire.

Frodo gazed in wonder at this marvelous gift that he had so long carried, not guessing its full worth and potency. Seldom had he remembered it on the road, until they came to Morgul Vale, and never had he used it for fear of its revealing light. Aiya Eärendil Elenion Ancalima! he cried, and knew not what he had spoken; for it seemed that another voice spoke through his, clear, untroubled by the foul air of the pit.

And this is only the light of the Silmaril that Galadriel has caught in the water of her mirror, not the Silmaril itself—a fragment of a fragment of the light of the Trees. It stands and acts in opposition of the Shadow, whether of Morgoth or of Sauron.

All of this has been to say: one can compare the roles that the Silmarils and the One Ring play in their respective stories, as each lies at the center, but there the similarities end. The Silmarils are desirable for their goodness; the Ring is desirable for the malicious power that it promises any prospective bearer. As objects of power they are the antithesis of one another, and for a reader to treat or regard the Silmarils as they would the Ring is, quite frankly, wrong. The motives of a maker matter in Middle-earth, and whatever his deeds later, one cannot equate Fëanor at the height of his power in Valinor to Sauron at the height of his in Mordor.

Bibliography:

1. The Fellowship of the Ring, “The Council of Elrond”, “The Shadow of the Past”, “The Mirror of Galadriel” 2. dictionary.com, entry: weregild 3. The Return of the King, “The Tower of Cirith Ungol" 4. The Silmarillion, “Of the Silmarils and the Unrest of the Noldor” 5. The Silmarillion, “Of the Ruin of Doriath” 6. The Silmarillion, “Of Thingol and Melian” 7. The Silmarillion, “Of Eldamar and the Princes of the Eldalië” 8. The Shaping of Middle-earth, “The Quenta” 9. The Hobbit, “The Gathering of the Clouds” 10. The Hobbit, “The Last Stage” 11. The Two Towers, “The Stairs of Cirith Ungol" 12. The Two Towers, “Shelob’s Lair”

#look i wrote a thing #meta #tolkien meta #silmarils #the one ring #lord of the rings #silmarillion

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lostbetweenvampiresandmusic · 11 months ago

Note

Hey there I was just wondering if you could maybe make a fic about this https://www.tumblr.com/ria-coolgirl/736373015713021952/hey-there-people-who-are-in-the-lost-boys-fandom

If you want to do it! 😅

Yeah, sure! Thanks for asking!💜

---------------------------------

Things had felt different ever since that night. Michael didn't know how else to explain it. At home, he could no longer stand his mother. How could she understand what he was going through? Besides the obvious reason (becoming a half-vampire), there was also this confusion - which was probably the hardest thing for Lucy to understand. So, he became cold towards her, just so she wouldn't ask. Then there was Sam. Sam was perceptive, and he had come close to figuring out what was bothering Michael - too close. So, he avoided yet another family member to avoid questions. Luckily, Grandpa was his old weird self and didn't bother him with anything of the sort.

The vampirism was scary and confusing. Neither David nor Star had explained anything to him, and it didn't seem like they were willing to. And David and Star were confusing. Not that they were, per se, but what they did to him. How they made him feel. How he was so certain that he was madly in love with Star, the girl of his dreams, but after sleeping with her, he just wasn't sure anymore. Every time he thought of her, he could hear the whispers in his head. David, saying his name, dragging him along to the bridge, making him jump and fly and drink - and do all these things he'd never done before.

He would have never done these things if it weren't for David. Or Star, he thought as he walked down the stairs leading to the cave. After all, Star brought him into this mess.

Even though the sun had just stopped setting, the cave was already empty. Or, at least - Michael realised he could sense this - there was only one individual inside. He just didn't know who. Based on the music, the voice of a woman singing a song, he would guess and say that Star was inside.

He didn't know why he felt a slight hint of disappointment. He had wanted to see her, at least to explain why he had just left after sleeping together. Maybe she would understand, but - and this he could understand as well - maybe she would also feel slightly hurt and maybe even a bit betrayed.

Taking a deep breath, he went inside. The words the woman was singing were finally becoming clear. "Look into my eyes, let them hypnotise..."

Michael walked further, expecting to see Star.

"Hello, Michael."

"David?"

The man chuckled, sitting in his chair. He had a cigarette in his hand and a book on his lap. "If you're looking for Star, she's out on the boardwalk."

"Eh, well," Michael grinned somewhat uncomfortably, "I was - eh - not really looking for her?"

David grinned, causing Michael to sigh. Somehow, David always managed to give everyone the feeling that he knew more. That he always knew everything that was going on, or everything about what was about to happen. It was infuriating. And - Michael couldn't help but think - kind of hot, in a weird way.

"It's a brave new world calling, a lovers fantasy..."

"I would have guessed that you'd listen to rock, or metal," Michael said eventually, breaking the silence. After stating that he was not looking for Star, David had just smirked, turning a page. He had not responded at all.

"Don't be blinded by stereotypes. It gets boring after a couple of decades."

"Why can you convince me to do things?"

"Like what?"

"Jumping of the bridge. Trusting you-"

"You did all that yourself. If you didn't want it, I couldn't have done a single thing about it."

"So you did influence me?"

David shrugged. "Nudged."

"Why?"

Now David turned to him fully, cigarette in hand. His book was put aside, and within seconds he was standing in front of Michael.

"How far are you willing to go, Michael?"

Michael felt both flustered and shaken. The music continued on, the hypnotising sound of the singer's voice echoing through the cave. The hypnotising look of David's eyes made it hard for him to think straight. All he could think about was him - that man in front of him. The man that turned him into this - could he call himself a monster? - this thing. The man who stood in front of him with this infuriating smirk, daring Michael to take the next step, to break the tension between them. Michael swallowed, thinking. How far was he willing to go? He sighed, and then he stepped forward.

"Fuck you." Quickly, before he could change his mind or be afraid of David's response, he kissed him. Quick and soft, lasting barely a few moments. Michael pushed David away, stepping back himself.

David looked at him, his cigarette now laying on the floor. "I'd say you're willing to go quite far, Michael."

The half-vampire didn't respond this time. Maybe it was the music, maybe it was David and his mind games, maybe he was being hypnotised - he didn't know. All he knew was that this and felt oddly right.

#the lost boys #marko #david #paul #dwayne #tlb #the lost boys 1987 #tlb 1987 #the lost boys x reader #lost boys #michael emerson #michael the lost boys #david x michael

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