#i think the burnout got me
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umblrspectrum Ā· 11 days ago
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happy solvermas
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poorly-drawn-mdzs Ā· 4 months ago
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I know those eyes.
[First]Ā PrevĀ <ā€“-> Next
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petrii-dish Ā· 3 months ago
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A piece of home
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meerphanim Ā· 1 month ago
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And the day we became one.
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snakes-of-the-undercity Ā· 21 days ago
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Vi is gifted kid burnout but in the english major way
#sheā€™s the best characterization Iā€™ve seen of gifted kid burnout outside of super-genius characters#like. as a burnt out gifted kid by legal designation. she is me#trying to succeed at everything because thatā€™s what youā€™re told to do or what you think needs to be done to be worth anything to anyone#being rigid to change because itā€™s not being done right but at the same time accepting change so long as people stay with you#and also how that ties in with being an eldest sibling#because ik folks love the whole ā€˜gifted kid jinxā€™ thing (not me but yaā€™ll do you) but yaā€™llā€”#YAā€™LL DO NOT UNDERSTAND MY NEED FOR BURNT OUT ACADEMIC VIā€”#because Vi never got the chance to be a kid and learn and grow and find what she actually enjoyed in the world outside of the last drop crew#but look at her. the way she speaks and the way she tried to teach powder the lessons she earned the hard way in the gentlest way possible#in the way she so desperately clings on to people and memories#my girl would be a WRITER#my girl would be writing poetry drunk in her shitty basement apartment after hooking up with a girl#my girl would be writing novellas in prison and getting her degree#because you know she sees the world like a romantic. her world is art and emotion and devotion. to her family. to anything she cares about#i need more literary! student vi. i need more academic vi. i need more grudging debate-team captain vi#i need vi getting her own place and having an extensive book collection that she develops because of the loneliness#Her gkb is going from a leader & soldier to someone who could be useful regardless to someone who is useless & being okay w/ it ->#to being needed again and not knowing how to handle it but knowing she refuses to fuck it up this time#GIVE ME VI W/ MY GIFTED KID ARCCCCCC#this probs makes no sense and is like 4 tangents but Iā€™ll expand on it later ā€˜cause im tired#coherency is for losers and the well-rested#vi arcane#arcane#arcane season 2#arcane spoilers#arcane season two#vi
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iwanttobepersephone Ā· 2 months ago
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So, my mom was telling me how much free time I have, and I was like, "I have no freetime wth do you mean?????" And I just wanna see if this is like. A normal way to think of things?
Things I need to do:
Finish reading icebound land
Make a whole lotta art that I promised people
Research study abroad programs
At least one Dutch lesson a day
Keep my room clean
Talk to my friends so they know I love them (and so I don't go insane)
My math homework
Keep myself clean (showers, finally brushing my teeth after months, etc etc) so I don't go insane
Eat at 7pm
Various things I enjoy as to not go insane
All from 6pm to 9 pm, every day, after being at school from 8 am to 3:30 pm and then The Public (teen center) from 3:30 to 5:30, and I need to be in bed by 9:30 and asleep by 10:00
So, basically, I'm "on the clock" from 7 am (When I start getting ready for school) until 9 pm, with no breaks
But yeah no I totally have free time. Yeaup
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elitadream Ā· 3 months ago
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Going anon for this one because I was feeling embarrassed but I also gotta know-- How did you manage to leave the Mario fandom? You seemed really passionate about it, and your posts were some of the best I've seen and read. What made you able to stop and focus on other things? Asking because as a small writer I kinda wanna do the same but I fear losing the few followers I have, so I feel stuck.
Do you have any advice for me?
Hi. ā˜ŗļø Thanks for reaching out!
While I wouldn't say I entirely left the Mario fandom (as I still have a genuine fondness for the games and part of the lore), I did let go of it quite a bit as an artist and I appreciate that you sought my perspective on what is a rather complex and delicate issue. šŸ¤²
Fanwork and involvement in itself can be really fun and quite harmless when done right, but there are three things that I believe should always be kept in mind when participating more actively:
1- You are not getting paid for what you do. A vast majority of creators online receive absolutely no compensation for their contribution, and those that do usually obtain it strictly through commissions. For the most part, it's hours of hard work spent creating and then sharing content for free. And while this isn't inherently problematic per say, it's important to never lose sight of what your efforts go into and in what way it benefits you (or not).
2- There are thousands upon thousands of communities out there, for nearly every subject imaginable. The one(s) you're currently focusing on may mean the world to you right now, but that could very well change tomorrow, or next year. My point being: it's nice to have a notable passion towards something, but I don't think we should let it reach a point where it takes up all the room and seeps into our every waking thought. Being open to discovering and learning about other things can be an eye-opening experience, and having different interests is very good for the mind.
3- Views and likes don't matter at the end of the day. They really, truly don't. They won't make a significant impact in your life nor bring anything substantial to the table. Essentially, it all circles back to why you're creating something and who you're making it for. Having followers can be very exciting and uplifting for sure... But it shouldn't be your sole motivation for staying in a fandom, because chances are this will make you very unhappy longterm. If you want to draw or write about something, please do it for yourself above all. It's the only lasting way you'll get a genuine sense of joy and gratification out of it, trust me.
As far as the online experience goes, I consider friends and enthusiastic exchanges about common interests to be THE ultimate purpose of any community. Not fanwork. Not the followers count. Only good vibes. And the greatest thing about this is, the close friends you make will stay with you no matter what you choose to focus on next, I can assure you that. šŸ’«šŸ’™
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neptunesailing Ā· 4 months ago
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me when the 18 trips i dont know
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puppppppppy Ā· 1 year ago
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your artstyle looks like it would make really cute mlp fanart and its making me want to ask if youve ever drawn mlp characters so here i am
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Now I have!
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dannybobany Ā· 7 months ago
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Hey omori fans! new genre of omori au that we should be making:
Previous iteration of headspace where Sunny got bored and decided to do a themed one, think about it right? Thereā€™s been dozens of different headspaces over the four years Sunny isolated himself he couldnā€™t have literally been doing the exact same thing the entire time right?
If the cycle can repeat in as little time as three days IMAGINE HOW MANY THAT MUST BE OVER FOUR YEARS And to be entirely fair it is said that this particular iteration is shorter then usual but even still I canā€™t imagine one headspace adventure ever lasted more then a week or two
Maybe one time Sunny decided he wanted a sc-fi headspace or a steampunk headspace, THE POSSIBILITIES ARE INFINITE PEOPLE!!!
(And yes, I did realize halfway through typing this that this is just the undertale au phenomenon.. but should that stop you? Absolutely not)
Me? I wanna make one where sunny got bored of how PG everything was so he made headspace gothic grimdark, the characters are allowed to curse now and the enemies bleed but.. like in the way a 13 year old boy would think is cool ā€¦ right? Thatā€™s funny to me and I would absolutely like to make designs for it
But thereā€™s so many ideas someone could do here, where was the truth contained? What areas are new and whatā€™s consistent? What form do the keys take?
Omori fans I WANT TO SEE THIS. Itā€™s crack itā€™s absolutely crack!! but do it anyway because it can also be fun !!!!
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awfullybigwardrobe44 Ā· 7 months ago
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look Iā€™m not saying that gifted kid culture wrecked my entire self esteem, made me feel like I was never good enough or special, or low-key affected 20+ years of my life
ā€¦actually, yeah, I am saying that. but hereā€™s the kicker.
i wasnā€™t the gifted kid. I was the average one.
i get that gifted kid culture wasnā€™t good for the gifted kids, but geez, I canā€™t be the only one out there who WASNā€™T gifted and was still hurt by the system and is still dealing with emotional and psychological fallout.
can we start recognizing the impact gifted kid culture had on the non-gifted kids too?
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mondaymelon Ā· 1 year ago
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ignore the fact i disappeared that was simple winter hibernation ( still sick and coughing out my lungs btw )
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for a basically nonexistent context itā€™s currently 1:50 am my paper is literally just on my mattress hello hard surface who and this is the most abhorrent lighting and i COOKED (dubious) šŸ”„šŸ”„šŸ”„ā€¼ļøšŸ„¶šŸ„¶šŸ„¶šŸ„¶šŸ„¶šŸ„¶šŸŒ¶ļøšŸŒ¶ļøāœØšŸŒ¶ļøšŸ˜‹šŸ˜‹šŸŒ¶ļøšŸ˜‹šŸ˜‹šŸ„ŗšŸ„ŗšŸ’–šŸ’–āœØāœØ
one of my ocs grgrggrjekslalksj I need to talk about them more on here nyways yeah uhm bye read the tags thanks
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angrybatart Ā· 2 months ago
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Someone needs a Rev Up.
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nyctoheart Ā· 2 months ago
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idk what came over me but i like this series again
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edge-oftheworld Ā· 25 days ago
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I donā€™t really talk about it much on here because Iā€™m extremely lucky to be able to understand exactly whatā€™s going on in my body, but itā€™s scary to live for years as someone who Gets Things Done in a way your peers donā€™t really understand, be putting effort into so many things you care about, and then suddenly lose the ability to do not only that but also basic tasks overnight after a deadline, and bit by bit after many. itā€™s scary getting really irritable sometimes to the point of violence, just when you were meant to be celebrating the rewards from your hard work, the only impact of the work you did that you can see is that you overdrafted your ability to do anything. including have a basic conversation without getting grumpy or crying. and your body is going to make you pay it back with interest, you already know that, but you donā€™t know how to start filling yourself back up. youā€™ve only ever enjoyed being on the grind, hard at work on exciting things.
I donā€™t know how many of you have been through the kind of burnout thatā€™s years of needing 12hrs of sleep a night but with terrible insomnia, waking up to what feels like a hangover for weeks on end with little relief then rinse and repeat without having a single drink, feeling too sick to eat and needing to exercise to emotionally regulate but being unable to, anxiety that doesnā€™t come from worry but youā€™ll pick that up too at some point, dissociating every time you try to do mentally taxing tasks that youā€™re PAID for so it takes an hour of grounding yourself just to get five minutes worth of productive concentration, falling asleep the minute you feel a little safe by being in the presence of loved ones. but I suspect Iā€™m not the only one.
Iā€™ve had songs for the energetic and angsty times leading up to this. for the exasperated times and the brain fog and the times where all my limited energy is tied up in feeling things. that I need to, need to acknowledge, but itā€™s overwhelming and I live in a haze for weeks as a result of. songs telling of the kind of youth I wish I had, even when I was sold something else. songs for the months spent as a teenager trying to be there for my friends, worrying for them, distracting me from worrying for myself, trying to cling on to positivity and hope amongst it when I had to choose to make a discipline of always seeing that. Iā€™ve had songs for healing and when healing is harder than expected and songs that have the right level of musical complexity to capture the layers of everything thatā€™s happening in my head, making it sound good, telling me itā€™s gonna be okay.
I donā€™t know how I could ever say thank you for this. but I do know that I see parts of myself in the people behind these songs, of course I do, and I worry for them as a result and ache for them because itā€™s hard enough to feel this way when no one knows me or feels the need to control me or mould me into what they think I should be. Iā€™d do anything to keep them all healthy and happy and all of their loved ones too and I donā€™t think itā€™s strange as a fan to take that seriously. I hope we can understand the need to treat them gently, and to while not questioning their privacy and the fact that theyā€™re never going to tell us everything they go through, listen to our intuition when we catch something we relate to and treat what theyā€™ve shared with us or hinted at with the dignity we would if someone we love told us something vulnerable. be kind in our expectations and be intentional in the fan culture we create because it does make its way back to them.
and the same goes with all of you. weā€™re bonding over the same things. I know a lot of this fandom is in the stage where interpersonal relationships are hard. we donā€™t mean to be grumpy of frustrated but we are. and Iā€™m sending love to all of you. we can get through this together. itā€™s what theyā€™ve always longed for isnā€™t it?
#thoughts after how worried Iā€™ve been recently. since june I think#Iā€™d love to start a conversation in this fandom about the connection im newly discovering between burnout and mental illness and fatigue#in a way we can be positive about these things and be there for each other without calling anyone to confirm if we interpret some songs#to represent experiences that may or may not be theirs because it doesnā€™t matter in the end. we have these songs and if you get it you get#weā€™ve all been clocked as ā€˜not feeling very wellā€™ recently anyway so. it doesnā€™t need to be specific. but we do need to be kind#like hey. artist. I donā€™t know exactly what youā€™re going through to have written these songs that mean this to me. but Iā€™m here for you#fill in the blanks. all weā€™ve got are our stories to share. I hope mine helps us understand and be a little kinder to those who need it#without thinking we can judge who we think needs it. but rather default to kindness and in the case of musicians etc that means patience#it means we learn together. what it means to connect and have boundaries and the boundaries they might like to have#anyway Iā€™ve not said who these songs are by so if you reblog and wanna tag another artist thatā€™s g Iā€™ve got a few by several others as well#but I know this fandom. I know this band and I know exactly why I worry for each band member though Iā€™m not gonna say here. just. take care#5 seconds of summer#5sos#luke hemmings#ashton irwin#calum hood#michael clifford#exact experience of burnout I have talked about is that of someone with adhd and a pda profile and some form of bipolar#which may be a product of pda profile things or not. these arenā€™t the only diagnoses Iā€™d likely fit but they are the ones that explain the#story and have guided me to understand how to recover and Iā€™m doing that bit by bit. and if you want me to tell you how please ask#but Iā€™m not advertising it cause thatā€™s weird Iā€™d sound like a scammer if I did. even if when Iā€™m hypomanic I think I can heal everyone
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unproduciblesmackdown Ā· 5 months ago
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(genderly) chill as hell if i was only ever glimpsed / detected like this
#Shrouded In A Rectangle neither sleeves nor an open front to be besieged with? yes#just doing whatever else like doesn't matter. tee cargo shorts which is my best guess rn of my ideal outfit. + sandals Absolutely#unfortunately my hair could never do that. somehow neither am i yet like forties fifties? have i not been at this for eons?#i Can be like uh let's just nobody talk to me i'm busy pensively perceiving truths that you don't ever actually wanna hear about#just the other day it was like hey....a [way Having To Talk could be a difficulty / problem] was under my nose in this lifelong pattern#certainly noticing the Verbal Exchange Demand heaped upon burnout as like [delay delay delay struggle weariness stress]#but also who knows like spent plenty of time just probably indeed Not having to have such exchanges while burned out. not noting them#anyway like this isn't even [dysphoric Ideal Outfit until i could [whatever supposed even more ideal than that gender euphoria]]#though shoutout to that but like nah get shrouded anyway. the only [how do i look] im motivated to consider is: when it's a costume#when it's just me it's like. i guess whatever pants and a comfortable enough tee. need glasses. hair's w/e so cut quite short ig#might accessorize w/things that are fun to me like hey yeah yknow i might want a calculator watch#[yea as a kid it was like :( im actively appreciating the animals supposedly Gross or Bad] if i had hated little friends Sure yaay#if i had disorienting light effects like a pelagic creature. but you don't even need that. like hey i'm nd in real life. i got it#chat i'm in the walls too bestie lmao. if only my bigfoot pose reference Step was this good#tl;dr long rephrasing of my being like; now the gender slay....#& nodding & Noting when [worksheet exercise: what's your gender euphoria look?] is like shrug idk. but this is serving maximally to me; so#going Chat how can i up my uncanny stats. looking up ''isn't it like Uncanny knowledge e.g. so like why not....canny''#but i think the un canny is the Uncanniness Accuser's perspective. not of My ken. your literal weird one maybe#so again apt to be like jk i'm just autistic & shit; i got it....horror shit challenge impossible: Don't have sm typical mundane#[disability moment] as like Unsettling danger/malice cues. challenge impossible; again#subverted here like as [horror holding hands touching foreheads w/comedy] w/o Rescinding just casual disabled behavior/qualities#just remembered like three witches weird sisters etc macbeth. weird uncanny soothsaying gendering. word#anyway i should be shrouded (made no any connection whenever i put the blanket now over my head & shoulders in place min ago)#perhaps the real Ideal Look insight: i do not have any way i wish to be observed by people. secret passages / removed room anytime
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