#i think some parm would also work!!

[whoopseydaisy]

Sky’s Secret

rich, complex, caffeinated. something fiddly, something red.

muddle 2 roasted (then chilled) grapes

2 oz. triple crème brie and aged white cheddar fat washed vodka (mostly brie, cheddar aged 1 year — get cheese with some crystals)

1/2 oz. cold brew (tangerine, light berry, sweet almond tasting notes, medium roast)

1/2 oz. — sweet red vermouth. the good local stuff.

stir over ice and double strain

serve in your most audacious martini glass garnish with gold flakes

my thanks to the muses @worldsbeyondpod @quiddie and @onsereverra for reminding me that obviously i should start with coffee when building a drink for suvi 😘😘😘

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #405

I had a weird dream that I don't remember very well. Something about needing to rehome all of our cats, for reasons I can't recall. I do, however, remember crying a lot.

Weird.

Today I scoured through the website for state jobs, looking for ones that I qualify for. I found a bunch of potential openings that I can maybe fill. But... I hit a roadblock. Apparently, a non-trivial number of them want me to attach a record of my unofficial college transcripts.

In order to get those, I need to access my college email, which I don't remember, because it has been like 13 years since last I've used it. I tried to get that info, but to do that, I need a PIN, which I also don't remember. So I tried to follow the process for that, but the PIN was sent... to the email address of an old high school teacher, because I didn't have my own email address back when I applied.

Sigh.

So I contacted the IT department over there to change the personal email address associated with my data over there (because I'm a big adult human now, with my very own email address and everything). But in order to do that, I need the address of where my mother lived at the time I applied, which I also don't remember.

...Sigh.

So I guess I'll go in person tomorrow; thankfully, the place where I gotta go isn't very far. I suppose I'll get it done after the orthodontist appointment, which is after physical therapy. So... tomorrow is probably gonna be pretty busy.

Aside from that, I... probably spent more time reading the news than I should have. The state of my brain right now... isn't great. Watching one's country descend into fascism in real time is really not good for the blood pressure, lemme tell ya. Still, what can I do aside from trying to keep my chin up and trying to be a source of support for those who need me?

We got burgers today. And I'm staying hydrated. In fact, I'm gonna get more water in like 10 minutes. I should probably eat again soon, too. Though admittedly, everything seems like it's either too much, or kinda gross.

...I wonder if you've experienced this. You wanna eat, but your body has decided that all food is illegal. Or maybe your body wants all the food, and can't choose, so it would rather sit, paralyzed and hungry. I'm in these states with some frequency. And, as insane as this is probably going to sound, sometimes I am in both states simultaneously, and the results are very weird, to say the least.

...Oh well. Maybe I'll ask M and J for suggestions or whatever, when I go down to get water.

I thought about playing Hades, but it feels incorrect. Continuing work on the crafting project also feels incorrect. I'm trying to get my brain to figure out what does feel correct, but it's being... uncooperative. I'm not really sure why.

On the bright side, I did get some pretty good pictures of the sky today. Here, check 'em out. I took one with the lamppost in front of me, and one with the lamppost behind me...

I decided to get pizza with mushrooms on it. I also got garlic naan and tzatziki sauce to dunk it in, and macaroni and cheese bites. They'll arrive soon. If they're pretty, I'll take pictures.

While I waited for the things to arrive, I decided to do some leisure writing, and I got clarity on a thing that has been bothering me for... gosh... a very long time. There's this thing I've been trying to do, and I thought I've been doing it wrong the whole time, but... actually I wasn't doing it wrong at all. I'm just not used to moving within the space, which makes it a little hard to navigate. But... I think I have a slightly better understanding of what I'm supposed to do. I guess time will tell me if I'm right.

Anyhoot. Here are the snacks we got...

This was a pizza with onions, mushrooms, and alfredo sauce:

This was a pizza with sausage, apples, and candied pecans:

These were gouda macaroni and cheese bites with garlic parm sauce:

...And this is tzatziki sauce made with goat milk yogurt, with some garlic naan:

...There are so many delightful things in my world. I wish you'd pop by someday so I can share them with you. Even though it's impossible, think about it anyway, okay?

I think I will sink a little more into some leisure writing; it's been a while since last I've done that, and it might explain why I've felt so disconnected from various things.

Today's letter is short. Sorry about it. With tomorrow being so busy, maybe I'll have a little more to write to you by then.

Please stay safe and healthy out there, Sephiroth. Please do your best to make choices that won't lead to you disappearing. Because I love you, and... I don't want to imagine what my life might have been like if I hadn't had your example to look to when I was struggling the most.

I'll write again soon.

Your friend, Lumine

[iamdieterbravo]

Saw Cooking Headcanons!!

Lawrence: He’s able to cook basic shit like mac n cheese for Diana but he’s always so busy with work that he can’t make much else. He and Alison take turns making dinner to fit their schedules.

Adam: He’s only able to make microwavable/preprepared food, but he really likes making sandwiches. If he does make something from scratch he doesn’t use a recipe and it ends up being a concoction of different canned/frozen foods.

John: Cooking master… like Yeah he can cook let him cook… Cause Jill is so busy working at the clinic he was the one who ended doing a lot of the cooking. Also he likes to bake he loves making bread.. baking is a destresser for him. When he was less sick he would cook meals for the apprentices if they were staying long hours in the warehouse.

Amanda: I’d say she’s probably about the same as Lawrence. She can make some simple dishes but doesn’t really have time to make anything else. I think she also would like baking a bit… Something about the precise measurements she’d enjoy.

Lynn: Way too busy with work and grief to have time for cooking. She’s able to make easy dishes for her daughter but they’re not that great so they end up getting takeout instead.

Rigg: He can microwave shit but would be completely lost in a kitchen. His wife (bless her) does most of the cooking and if she’s preoccupied he just gets takeout.

Hoffman: Autism be damned my boy can work a grill! I actually think he’s OK at cooking.. he had to learn when taking care of Angelina and then picked it up as a hobby. Now, he’s not a prodigy in the kitchen by any means but he can make a mean chicken parm. Also he loves butchery.. he loves cutting that shit up like Yeah go get that oyster steak..

Strahm: Do NOT let him within 20 feet of anything in a kitchen.. that shit will be broken or explode if he so much as gets near it… If burning water was possible, he’d do it.

Jill: She’s able to cook and likes cooking with John but doesn’t really enjoy it beyond that. Plus she’s busy with the clinic so she doesn’t have much time.

[strawberrytoki]

Hey there ❤️

May i request some hijikata × reader who's an incredible cook that doesn't mind his mayonnaise addiction but also makes him lots of hijikata's specials and how his reaction will be 🥰🥰

a/n: thanks for my first ever request, anon! hope this doesn't disappoint. Sorry this took me a while to put out, I've been balancing my internship and two summer courses, all while trying to not pass out at 8PM (love that for me!)

.・。.・゜✭・..・。.・゜✭・..・。.・゜✭・..・。.・゜✭・..・。.・

You and Hijikata met when you were working at the small restaurant right around the corner. He frequented it all the time because of the homey, cozy feel that the restaurant had, which he definitely appreciated after being bombarded with his shinsengumi force partners' incompetence all day. He also did not mind ample servings of his favorite condiment, mayonnaise, and a certain waitress that he took a liking over the course of his many visits.

After he eventually worked up the courage to ask you out, you two quickly took a liking to each other's company, and grew comfortable around each other. However, there was one thing that piqued your interest.

His concerning mayonnaise addiction.

You took notice of it the day you made him a plate of chicken parm for date night, and he took out a whole tub of mayonnaise, piling dollops upon each other on the dish, resulting in an absolute monstrosity. You were almost offended but you loved him too much to be.

"This tastes impeccable, thank you love." His plate was almost clean. "You mean with or without the excessive mayonnaise?" you nudged his shoulder, teasing him. "I mean... I'd have loved it either way, I do love my mayo though."

You also noticed how he'd order a truckload of mayonnaise when he ordered his bowls of rice before you started dating. Putting two and two together, you concluded that he must've been eating his rice with an ungodly amount of mayonnaise.

Ever since then, you've been incorporating the condiment in the meals you'd make for him, and he always subtly expressed his gratitude. Time had flown by and you came to the realization that your one year anniversary was approaching, so you had to get your gears turning to think of something special.

Hijikata was a simple man, and for that, you were grateful. You shouldn't have been racking your brain trying to think of what to do for him, but you were too much of a perfectionist to give it a rest. Then it dawned upon you.

You just had to make him his special dish that he, oh, so loved. He didn't crave anything Michelin-star levelled, or anything crazy fancy. All he would yearn for is his simple bowl of seasoned rice and mayonnaise, and you figured it was a good idea to make him just that.

You planned on surprising him with the...revolting dish when he came back from a shinsengumi meeting, and you did.

He came home to the inviting aroma of your scented sage candle, and a dimly lit room with the inviting dish set on the small dining table you two shared. You were clad in the flowy little black dress that he loved on you, and had our hair in an updo.

"Well? Do you like the set-up?"

He slowly started making his way towards you, opening his arms wide open to engulf you in an embrace. "I love it." He softly said, whispering in your ear.

The dish caught his eye, and his eyes lit up. He then immediately got to digging. Hijikata really appreciated how thoughtful and observant you were, because he often had trouble expressing his feelings and emotions, and often came off as unpleasant or aloof. So you being able to pick up on the small things and take note of what he loves is something he will always be grateful for.

[microraptorreactor]

I feel like dumping out my box of OCs like one would do a box of lps so very long post filled with very many doodles ahead!

Reference for my Rainworld oc, Lost! He's an idiot kid I made for one joke but now he lives in my brain. I think I made this reference for him last year? Idk I don't remember. I'm just now realizing that Lost snuck into my V2 characterization lmao.

Elysium art of various ages! Made between 2021-2023 I believe. This is the oc I made before I knew what Ultrakill was and everyone thought I was making an Ultrakill joke. Tbh if it wasn't for the fact that I MADE Elysium and have their early sketches I wouldn't believe they weren't an Ultrakill reference either. Speaking of which, here's some animations from when Elysium was both a quadruped and a model of robot instead of an individual. These were both made for a class in 2021.

VERY old art (2020 I think? I wasn't using my screen tablet yet) that I normally wouldn't include if it weren't for the fact my friends would explode me if I mentioned Elysium and Lost without mentioning Nerve. She was an anxiety-ridden warforged cleric who got tragically sent to the vampire realm. Whenever Nerve comes up in discussion one of my friends brings up how I made him cry with her final speech. I don't remember tf I said lmao.

Art of my His Dark Materials OC, Zurial! Art would have been made 2022 onwards. I made her WAY back in 2019 before Hazbin Hotel even had a pilot but unfortunately now she looks like a Hazbin angel and I feel weird drawing her. Which is really unfortunate because I love her dearly, she's one of my favorite OCs. She's also the only oc I have who I've made a plushie for. Why did my character design have to accidentally look like the works of famous youtube animator Vivian Medrano T-T

(here's her plushie btw. I'm really proud of it lol.)

Here's Niphit, one of my Warframe OCs! Some of y'all might recognize her as my AO3 pfp, but her design has changed since then. The bottom reference sheet is her most recent design. She's kind of conceptually similar to Baeri/Sleet/-31 from SftBT, in terms of hacking shit and having a snout and teeth. Biggest difference is that she is a whole ass hivemind, usually pretty harmless, and also considered pretty young.

Shameless CR:K fanchild OC. Her name is Golden Parmesan Cheese Cookie (Parm or Parmesan for short) and she's also, like, an AI copy of a dead person. Or a dead person's soul trapped inside an eternal simulation? Either way she's got SO many issues. I have a massive chatfic wip from when I decided to try writeing something with her.

Okay I know technically this is a Homestuck OC but I like to say she's a Hiveswap OC. Because I played Hiveswap and loved it but never read Homestuck. Anyways her name is Vintan she's a yellowblood.

Whoa an original character! Yeah this is Corion, they come from my brain. I have a whole story concept about post-apocalyptic robot cowboys (and human cowboys) that I've done a couple doodles from but never written down. Corion serves as a sort of living taxi, guiding or carrying people across the wasteland. They are a secondary protagonist, I don't think I have art of Pike and Amelia, the actual protagonists. One funny fact about this universe is it contains a character named V1 (pronounced Vi, still written as V1) who I can no longer use for obvious reasons.

But yeah! Ramble over! Not anywere near all of them I just wanted to talk about my brain children XD

[3gremlins]

i made a gluten free focaccia/flat bread type thing using a mix from my current favorite gf bread maker* (young kobras, they're based out of sf so shipping's not too bad in california at least) and you know, it's not half bad at all?!?

i did add salt and some herbes de provence for flavor (their gf bread is good but it def could use a little more seasoning imho) and then didn't feel like making full on pizza so just kind of went the flat bread route with what i have (it's the end of the grocery cycle, so it's just basil/parsley, then some parm + goat cheese. probably pair it with some kale/balsamic vinegar later, but honestly it could go with lots of things).

the mix came with all the dry ingredients you need- it came with a little yeast pack which was amazingly still good and rose decently as you can see (i think i bought the mix a few months ago, at least 4). it also didn't take too long (45 min to rise, then 25 min in the oven). One mix packet makes one pizza/flatbread

i don't think it'll ever make my favorite sort of pizza (which is ny style, really thin and foldable)- it was def harder to roll out thin without breaking (i probably could have rolled it out a little more) but honestly decent! esp given that gf pizza recipes can be a lot of work for less than stellar results, this is a decent low effort alternative.

(i'm also low on olive oil and used "earth balance" in the batter, which seems to have worked fine. i'm sure olive oil would have been better, but i wanted to use what i had left on the top)

[i normally don't use mixes outside some of the pre-made flour blends like better batter's etc, and usually go about working on recipes the hard way so this was a nice surprise] *if you just want to try their bread, i really like their fake "rye", the seeded buckwheat and the regular "plain" sourdough flavors. i haven't tried the others tbf (they feel less versatile tho).

[louisisalarrie]

Hi! Let me start by saying that I am a follower of your blog because I enjoy your take on things. Not because I hate follow you like some people seem to do. With that said, I’m very excited you get to meet Louis on Sunday! How fun for you! But I have an honest question. Not one to argue with you or even question you. But something I’ve wrestled with myself. Since you know all of the lies we’ve been fed about F being his son, and you see the gaslighting that goes on regularly from Louis to his fans. Most recently, the infamous chicken parm tweet, how do you separate that as a fan of his? How do you get so excited to meet him without wanting to look him in the face and say please stop lying. Maybe it’s just me. I’m just having a hard time with him continuing to lie to us and scold us and then out of the other side of his mouth he says he has the most freedom he’s ever had. That just tells me he choosing to lie and use F for his gain. His gain means money and fans. I don’t know… again, not trying to judge you. Just trying to understand and figure out where my brain is. I hope you have a wonderful time at the show!

Hey anon! Thank you for the kind words. It’s perfectly normal to feel this way, and a lot of us have these moments as well! So don’t stress x

I think what’s important here overall is to remember that record labels, managers, everyone involved in Louis’ team make money from Louis’ fame and publicity too. It’s certainly not just louis, and a huuuuuge chunk of it goes towards them, particularly if he’s signed to a Global Deal which I imagine he would be. Remember how in one direction they were worked to the absolute bone? Barely having a break, nonstop touring, recording every second they could (a good example is that one scene from This Is Us where zayn was asleep for 10 minutes before he was woken up to record more vocals) and they were just kids. They signed a contract without a personal lawyer due to X Factor rules, were taken advantage of, and used as a money making machine for S*co and his bunch of monkeys. But I’m sure you’re already very aware of this, so let’s fast forward to 13 years down the track with this in mind…

Louis was roped into a wild stunt contract, also known as bbg, with a half assed promise of more freedom for him, a potential end result of him and harry coming out, and probably a bunch of other promises and opportunities thrown his way if he signed off on it. He received solo PR while still being in a band, meaning he had a bit of a safety blanket if the band broke up and wouldn’t immediately disappear from the public eye (like Liam did). And you know what? BBG was probably meant to go for a much shorter time than it has. I imagine the proposed stunt, and the alterations it’s had over the years, look pretty bloody different. But without going into too much detail on that stunt specifically, Louis is incredibly smart in the way he communicates with us. He does juuuuust enough to meet his contractual obligations. He knows what he can get away with. He knows his fandom is majority larries. He knows what we talk about and what we say.

The consequences if he didn’t sign this contract? Probably pretty dire, if I’m honest. When you have one of the biggest labels in the world (the other two are WME & Universal) throwing you a bone, it’s pretty hard to turn it down. These 3 labels (also known as The Big 3 in the industry) have a monopoly over the music industry and can make or break someone pretty damn quick. So I imagine he would’ve signed to cover his own ass and not lose his whole career, because he’s been manipulated into that. The music industry can be evil and brutal and it’s all about money. All about PR.

Particularly in this day and age where we are oversaturated with celebrities, media, etc., it’s hard to stand out from the crowd. The Big 3 are good at what they do, and that’s why they are The Big 3. They know how to do PR, they know how to write contracts and get artists to sign off on them, they know how to dangle carrots and make deals that benefit themselves greatly (oftentimes more than the artist). So being in louis’ position, it was more like he was coerced into it, if that makes sense?

Sorry, im tired from work and rambling now, but have you heard the phrase “separate the art from the artist”? It’s an interesting take that some people agree with, so they can enjoy that artist’s music while ignoring their faults/bad choices/problematic behaviour, because the music is what’s important. I don’t necessarily agree with that take, and I’m not gonna go down a rabbit hole on it, but I do think some fans do this with louis. And that helps them still enjoy the music, without getting involved in bbg or any other stunts, ya know? It helps to just think about the cutie happy wholesome louis that we know and love, and not his PR image. And that is absolutely fair enough, I just can’t do that because I know too much and I’ve been here for too long and I WILL see this through hahahah.

Okay now to actually answer your question, about me personally, of course I would want to tell him to leave his contract and get a better deal and come out with Harry and trust that his fans will still love him and he’ll still have a career, but that’s not possible. It’s not possible because I’d get throat punched by security, but it’s also not possible because that’s not realistic. He knows what we all say, and what we think of larry. He understands our frustration and can literally see it online every day. His hands are tied, until they’re not. And we can’t do anything about that. So it’s just about appreciating him and his music because we can’t control anything else.

So, just remember that he’s beautiful and sweet and caring, watch some old one direction videos/larry deep dives, and take a breath because we know him, and he’s not this asshole that his image has radically become.

[marcholasmoth]

OSRR: 3596

today was my momma's birthday! she turned 70 today.

today i ended up going with momma to walmart and getting a bunch of stuff. we walked around the store and i had an increasingly hard time walking because - you guessed it! - my heel hurt!

honestly i don't know why i don't just have it in my file to never see that doctor. she doesn't listen to me. ever. it wastes my time and money and it's fucking terrible. i practically couldn't waste that money worse than this - if i gave it to just about anyone else it'd be beneficial and not a waste! god i hate that woman. what's the point of being a doctor at all if you're not going to fucking listen to your patients???

anyway.

while we were out, though, mom and i were walking along the back wall past the shoe section, and we spotted some slider sandals, the first of which that caught my eye were DBZ. my mom first saw the spongebob ones, but since i would rather have my retinas disconnect again than own spongebob merchandise, i was happy to point out the other kind i saw next to them - naruto ones.

so mom got me naruto sliders which are wicked comfy and will be great if my foot doesn't heal the way it should.

mom and i spent the afternoon watching some more episodes of the flash, before i went and made us dinner and brought it back up. we watched the end of a season of the great british baking show and then plopped the flash back on before it was time for bed.

nothing from joel today, but the man (1) needs his space and (2) usually has a game on tuesdays. i let him breathe. he lets me breathe. living together full time will be interesting, but nice - i'll get to cuddle with him and talk to him even on work nights because eventually i will be working a job with normal hours. inshallah i will get a normal hour job.

below is a bunch of stuff about my relationship with my mom. you don't need to read it if you don't want.

it was nice to just spend time with my mom without any other pressure or whatever. i think it's fun to spend time with her. she's silly. i love my mom a lot. yes our relationship at its core is complicated, and yes there are a lot of things that she's done that i resent. i won't deny that. and i know the argument of "but she's my mom" isn't always a good one because of one thing or another, depending on the situation. but even after all of that, i still love my mom. our relationship has improved since i've been out of the house more and more, and i'm confident that's why this is my perspective. but i love my mom. i like spending time with my mom. no she won't know everything unless she gets real cool with a lot of things real fast, but having a good relationship is a damn good start.

the older i've gotten the more i understand her actions, the choices she's made, the decisions she makes, the more i understand her as a person. which is nice to be able to do. understanding and relating are two different things but i can translate what she says and does into something i can understand - usually. of course the differences in communication leave her angry and me overwhelmed because she's NOT clear when she communicates and i am trying to bridge the gap she leaves, but i often do an okay job. but she has a short temper when it comes to asking questions and getting answers and then the answers i give are unsatisfactory. which is frustrating. "what do you think of _____?" if i don't say anything i am thinking??? what do you want me to do, keep useless information and analysis on file??? nah. "do you want chicken parm for dinner?" no, because i don't like chicken parm. i never have. i have been your child for 31 years. you should know that i don't like chicken parm.

so it's shit like that that drives me fucking bonkers. and if i'm short back she gets defensive which is also fucking annoying, so whatever, it is what it is. i try to control my tone as best i can. whether or not it works is a different question.

this turned into a long discussion of my mom and that's not really what i was aiming for today, but it is what it is.

in spite of all of it, i still love my mom. i'm glad she's still here to help me, when i have hard times or when i need advice. and i'm glad i can be present to temper her attitude toward others because good lord that woman is a nightmare of judging.

so i continue to keep the peace. 31-and-a-half-plus-years running.

[thetastytable]

I made this tonight and it was very good! I do have notes, though, for future me and anyone else who'd like to try it:

The recipe says it takes an hour, it took me about 1.5 hours. Which is pretty good, honestly, I was hustling. Plus I ~embellished~ the sauce and was working with tiny slices of eggplant.

(I used eggplant from the farmer's market, which was small and globe shaped, so I used all 8 or so of those. [I also bought mozzarella that came in 4 medium-sized balls. All of this slicing slowed me down considerably!])

Normally I make my family's spaghetti sauce recipe if I'm making something like this or lasagna, but it adds a lot of time. Here, I just sautéed some diced onions and bell pepper and mixed it in with my fave sauce (Classico fire roasted tomato and garlic 😜). It was fine!

I think the whole dish could be moister. Next time I'd add a 1/4-1/2 c. of water to the sauce so it doesn't dry out in the oven.

I had quite a bit of breading left over after breading the eggplants, so I just used it to top the whole dish before baking it. This also saved me from needing the other 1/4 c. of parm.

I used 2% milk (what we had on hand) instead of almond milk for the wet eggy stuff and it was just fine. I don't know why they call for almond milk.

I did not have fresh basil for topping, which was a shame! I had already maxed out my totally arbitrary quota of fresh herbs I allow myself to buy at the store. But fresh herbs are the star of the dish!

(The fresh thyme was certainly worthwhile.)

I baked the eggplant for 20 mins and really should have cooked it longer (n.b., I think my oven runs cool).

I served it with veggie Italian sausage but it's hardy enough that the sausage was totally unnecessary. A light salad and garlic bread would be 😘👌 That's all!

[mermaidsirennikita]

I feel like I’ve really been struggling to find books that I enjoy/am super excited to read. Can you recommend any books that you love or that have helped you get out of a reading slump? Contemporary/historical/paranormal are all great! Thank you!

Yeah, for sure! I haven't been in a true slump for a while. I have been through a bit of a book hangover these past few days just because I keep wanting to reread what I read before versus committing to new stuff, but that's different. I will say that I think combining audiobooks and standard reading has helped me avoid slumps. But audiobooks aren't for everyone, obviously!

Anyway, here's a lot of books with more info than you needed.

Okay, so.... I've been trying to lay off ranting about them too much because I still have friends who need to read them, and I'm working on a powerpoint/intro thing about them, but it's hard because Mila Finelli's Kings of Italy series is like. The best shit I've read in a while. Easily the most a series has consumed me since the next series I'll mention, which I read around October of last year--and it's a lot shorter, so it's easier to read through. I literally just ran through these books like a madwoman. I read through the wee hours of the morning; I read on a bus with a weird individual reading over my shoulder; I read on the subway; I read waiting for the subway; I read on a bench; I read in a restaurant while doing a solo bottomless brunch which was one of the most transcendentally peaceful experiences of my life. And now I've just been reading again, and trying to convince myself not to get the audiobooks because that would be RIDICULOUS but IS IT??? IS IT THO???

The series should be read in order, imo, and the first two books are a full duet, so not standalones. What I think makes this series stand out, aside from the emotionality combined with eroticism (these are.... definitely among the very hottest books I've ever read) is the choice to focus on the mafia in Italy, versus the mafia in America, which is what a lot of mafia books do (from what I'm told). So you get like, actually Italian characters and culture, versus Eyetalian (the Americans that love chicken parm and have their own unique culture that is nonetheless *nothing* like Italy Italians, who to be fair have many different cultural nuances due to the regionality of Italy, dialectal differences, economic--). I'm not Italian, but I have lived in a couple different parts of Italy and make it a priority to travel there whenever it's possible (which isn't often because money, but if I can I do it). The dudes in these books feel like Italian men, albeit with obligatory romance novel exaggeration. In most romances, they feel Eyetalian.

Mafia Mistress and Mafia Darling are about Fausto Ravazzani and Frankie Mancini; he is a don in Siderno, her dad is a part of a Toronto branch of the organization who runs afoul of him, Frankie is basically given to Fausto's son and heir Giulio in marriage. But before Giulio and Frankie can marry (she is not happy about this arranged marriage thing, and tbh neither is Giulio) Fausto decides "fuck it, she and I are vibing, she's not a virgin anyway, she's gonna be my new mistress" because Fausto is That Guy. It is age gap, it is very daddy, it has a heroine who's like defiant but is she really? Because she really does love the daddy thing. There is spanking and some light degradation and rough sex and a loooot of spoiling. And also DRAMA. If you have ever wanted to try an age gap romance.... this shit nails everything I personally love about it. Fausto is classy and old school and will also cut a man up into a million pieces and feed him to dogs, probably.

Mafia Madman, my favorite in the series, comes next, and it is a VILLAIN ROMANCE. The villain of the previous duet, Enzo D'Agostino, kidnaps Frankie's sister Gia as a part of a REVENGE PLOT, because he is both very smart and incredibly cracked. Like, my dude is living on a VILLAINOUS YACHT. His plan is to keep Gia in a cage and break her will and then dot dot dot, he hasn't thought it COMPLETELY THROUGH, but then! Gia turns out to be the greatest weakness for a man such as he: a FUCKIN' BRAT. This bitch is doing naked yoga in her cage, she's telling him all the filthy things she'll do to him (not that she waaaants to ohhh nooooooo, she haaaates him especially when he DOES STUFF to her), she's driving him out of his mind which is already very tenuous! A new classic for me, I can't stop thinking about it, and again, even better if you read the first two books first (and they're absolute bangers so you should). 15/10, would stay in the cage. Enzo and Gia are a perfect match of wills, and watching them break and fall in love is gorgeous. A top tier grovel, too, if you see

Mafia Target, the most recent release, also incredible. This one follows Giulio, Fausto's oldest son, who's hot as fuck, and naturally a MAFIA TARGET. Someone, someone whose name perhaps rhymes with Schmenzo, has in fact taken out a hit on Giulio (and semi forgotten about it? Because Gia's pussy is God? Gia fucked that man so good he deadass forgot about a really important mafia hit he put out? I love them) and has hired the best assassin in the game, Alessio Ricci. Anyway, Giulio sees a guy in the club, he gets head from him, as he does, and then he's advised that Alessio Ricci is trying to kill him and realizes THE GUY IN THE CLUB WHO SUCKED HIM OFF WAS ALESSIO RICCI LMAO. Anyway, this one is a extremely hot, extremely emotional, and probably the most straightforwardly romantic book in the series? Because Giulio and Alessio are better at Feelings than Fausto and Enzo, if still very Bad At Feelings. Another top fuckin' tier grovel. (For the record, Fausto does a good grovel in his duet, but imo the subsequent books have better grovels.)

These books are pEAK. And if you're interested in an historical series by the same author with a different name to break you out of your slump--Mila Finelli is Joanna Shupe, and I'd recommend reading her Uptown Girls trilogy for slump breakage. I also love love LOVE her Fifth Avenue Rebels series, but Uptown Girls might be a bit more... compulsively readable? The similarities and differences between her historicals and her mafia books are fascinating (Clay Madden -> Enzo D'Agostino... there is a pipeline).

The other series (and I do feel like a good series is a great slump breaking tactic, because if the series is good you domino them) I find incredibly readable is, of course, Kresley Cole's Immortals After Dark. There are like, 19 books in this series, I enjoyed all of them though some are stronger than others. They are probably best read in order. I just blazed through them, but you could always read a few, break, read a few, break.

Of course, Lisa Kleypas's Wallflowers is a great historical series. I also find her Gamblers of Craven's duology so so good from a duology POV, and I say this as someone who read Dreaming of You by itself and read Then Came You years later.

Lorraine Heath is obviously incredible. I'd read her Once Upon a Dukedom series for slump breakage; I adore the first book as one of my favorites of hers, and the second is a general fan favorite.

Tracey Livesay has an amazing contemporary called American Royalty, which is about a British prince falling in love with an American rapper. It's very "Harry and Meghan if Meghan was MEGAN (Thee Stallion)" and it's super hot and lovely. The sequel is out this summer, so you might wanna get a head start!

Heated Rivalry and The Long Game by Rachel Reid are two of my favorite contemporaries ever--and it's a duet! Focuses on Ilya Rozanov (cocky, charming, self-assured) and Shane Hollander (golden boy, uptight, anxious), hockey arch rivals who have been hooking up on the DL since their rookie season. Very much a FEEEEELINGS duet, but also very, very hot. I've read both a billion times.

The Queer Principles of Kit Webb and The Perfect Crimes of Marian Hayes (in that order) by Cat Sebastian is a pair of queer historicals that can be read as standalones but read better together and in order. Kit is a retired highwayman who's approached by Percy, a nobleman. Percy and his stepmother, Marian, need Kit's help to rob Percy's father; in the process of training Percy to do it, Kit, of course, falls in love with him. Percy is one of the more relatable characters ever, he is a BITCH AND A HALF LOL.

Something Fabulous and Something Spectacular (out today!) are a pair of hilarious queer historical romcoms by Alexis Hall. Begins with Something Fabulous, which is about Valentine (a duke!) proposing horrifically to a woman he's been pledged to since childhood. She responds by running away, and Valentine goes on a cross country adventure to catch her, alongside her twin brother, Bonny--who he begins falling for.

Lush Money by Angelina M. Lopez. Self-made lady billionaire wants a baby, and convinces a prince of an impoverished nation to marry and impregnate her in exchange for a financial bailout. HOT. ENEMIES TO LOVERS. INSANE.

Nobody's Baby But Mine by Susan Elizabeth Phillips, for an older contemporary. A fucking insane book wherein a genius scientist tricks an aging NFL star into knocking her up so that she can have a baby of middling intelligence, who's "normal". Her thought process is that she's super smart and he's super dumb, so they'll make an a average kid. Except oops, this motherfucker is actually QUITE smart, and when he figures out her deal he's like "nO KID OF MINE WILL BE A BASTARD" and forces her to marry him. Has a scene where he shows up at the class she's teaching, leans against the doorway, and menacingly goes "CLASS IS OVER" and honestly? It worked real hard.

Priest by Sierra Simone. Erotic romance about a Catholic priest who starts getting worked up by the woman telling him all this dirty shit during confessional, except they actually fall legit in love and there's some really gorgeous religious pondering throughout.

Queen Move by Kennedy Ryan. Childhood friends torn apart by circumstance meet again later and feel sparks, but she's a hardcore political fixer and he has a id and a baby's mother. Angsty drama and reconnection, I fuckin love it.

Ruby Dixon's Aspects and Anchors series, which is a cross-universe fantasy romance series in which the heroines get thrown through portals into this high fantasy world. They basically have to serve these gods as their tethers to the mortal realms, and obviously... the gods fall for them. Can be read a standalones but I'd read them in order. Hot, romantic, and fun in a way Ruby Dixon excels at.

Preferential Treatment by Heather Guerre is a romance about a woman who becomes her CEO billionaire boss's dom. It's hot, it debates whether or not a billionaire can be ethical, and he gets. on. his. kneeees.

[zouislover]

hii no worries!

lol well i try to include him in stuff but we’re just into wildly different things. and yeah for sure, it’s weird bc we have a pretty big age difference i just saw her as a baby for so long, until one day she was old enough to talk about more stuff and we’ve been besties ever since. being an older sister is definitely not for the weak but i wouldn’t change it if i could (though i do wish i had one a bit older than me too lol). oof gosh i don’t think it’s possible for me to just pick one…. we find ourselves in laughing fits so often. going to a txt concert together was pretty incredible though!

they are def movie vibes. they properly met (had seen each around before) bc my dad worked at a brewery and my mom came looking for a job, and he pretended he was the manager and hired her. his actual boss said he would hire her but only if my dad trained her. they worked together for a while, my dad told his friend who also worked with them that he was gonna marry her one day. friend said good luck lol. then my mom had to leave town, and that morning my dad showed up and tossed his bag in the car and said i’m going too, and they’ve been together ever since.

ok tbh i usually make it without the vodka too lol, only if i have the patience. also my sibling Swear they can taste it when there’s alcohol in the sauce and they prefer it without so i’ve just gotten in the habit of making it that way. oh yeah veggies in pasta is my favvvv! my all time fav pasta dish is just pasta primavera (aka with roasted veggies and olive oil and salt) and then topped with an ungodly amount of fresh cheese (parm or any kind at all). we’re having soup for dinner tonight but i’m not sure what kind yet 👀 probably some sort of italian chicken soup.

ooooo those sound amazing!! yesyes i lovvveeee naan i love indian food in general. i love samosas and butter chicken and palak paneer and lentil curry and everything else i’ve ever tried. i’m from the US so we have a lot of access to different foods. i can’t imagine it’s AS good as actually being there, of course, but i do love what i’ve had! i’ve never had those two things tho. modak sounds sooooo 😻😻

yesss my little forest town was the coziest. christmas party that sounds fun!! i wish i had a party to go to lol. i did go see my trees yesterday tho!! i’ll show u pics after i’m off anon if u wanna seeeee 👀 i don’t think it’ll let me add pics anonymously? maybe through submission but not asks.

my christmas holidays start the day after thanksgiving lol, i mean i’m not in school and nothing is on a strict schedule and my mom looovvessss christmas so we just do as much as possible leading up to it. i honestly don’t think i relax any more or less than a typical day, bc i usually am pretty chill and i always like having things to do equally? so im kinda just like making my regular relaxation and activities and festive as possible. we’re gonna make gingerbread houses tomorrow i think? and have more christmas lights to look at and baking to do and stuff. i love it im very big on holidays in general i love having things to celebrate and do special things for. ^-^ are there any festive foods from another country’s winter holidays that you really want to try?❄️🌸

hiiiii 💙

yeah that does make sense if u guys are into completely different things it becomes a bit hard to include them into things, especially if they're younger than u (i'm assuming he's a teenager/early 20s and that age period is truly so whack) ooh what's the age gap between u and ur sister! my sister is 5 years younger than me and i knowww i get u because she was so tiny and now she's about to be 20 and i don't know how i feel about it. and it's been weird because i moved away from home when she was 12 and it's wild that she's in uni now like where did all the time go (and the way things are going for me rn i'll probably only get to see her for her graduation and that's a whole other leap i don't want to think about because what do u mean i saw her before she started uni and next time i see her she'll have graduated 🥲)

how was the concert! i really don't know much about kpop so i apologise but pls do tell me who ur favourite member is and what's ur favourite song by them 👀

someone should definitely make ur parents' story into a christmas rom com movie because it's literally begging to be done! that is so so so romantic oh my god! like it's got the exact recipe for a good small town christmas romance 😭😭

i haven't really tried it with vodka (i only kinda started drinking this year and i am taking it slow) but is the hint of vodka that strong in the sauce usually? god yes i love a good primavera with crunchy veggies in. i only like broccoli when it's in pasta because it just goes so well with a red creamy sauce! ooh most important question : what's ur favourite pasta shape! sooo how was the soup? 👀 i'm vegetarian but i love a good hot n sour noodle soup with loads of pepper in it!

i feel like u can never go wrong with indian food because it's got something for everybody! but god yes the dishes u mentioned are some of my favourites too! i know u said samosas but have u tried samosa chaat? it's basically a samosa broken into pieces and then we had some mint sauce, tamarind sauce and sweetened yoghurt on top of it! i haven't been to the usa, but while i was in the uk there were so many indian places and some of them were really good and reminded me of home so i'm guessing that that's the same with usa too! especially with how many indians live there now. and yes modak is truly so so good! maybe next year during ganesh chathurthi u'll be able to get it in the states!

it was fun! i only just started working here and it was a good way to meet everyone and also learn spanish. yes yes please do send me pictures after! i think u can't submit media while staying anonymous so it will have to sadly wait 🥲

oh so u pretty much have the entirety of december off! do u celebrate thanksgiving? how was it this year for u? i'm guessing that u guys put up the lights and decorations after halloween itself then! do u guys go get a tree from a christmas tree farm? 👀

i feel like my life has been so all over the place for the past couple years that anytime i get days off i just rot in bed but i do like staying active too. like i need some form of exerting activity between bedrotting to keep me sane! do u have any hobbies that u do during holiday season? what other festivals do u celebrate 👀

ooh i don't know much about festive foods in particular but i would loooove to have authentic pizza and pasta in italy! what about u!!

[srldesigns6277]

How does teaching summer school work? Do you get to teach History? Sam, do you not have a case on your phone? Does the crack hinder the use. I cracked my screen protector and have been putting off changing it every if my thumb gets caught at times. Also what did you have for dinner? Sorry for all the questions, you don't have it answer.

Hi lovely,

I dont mind the questions so no worries. Teaching summer school is teaching the basics of multiple topics at an accelerated pace. So instead of really in depth analysis of certain historical issues or time periods, it's more of a thematic overview of courses. So in World History it would be a week of imperialism as a concept with some examples. Same with Nationalism in Europe, where you mention some specifics not all, though I do mention Poland's history of elected kings because I find it fascinating.

Regarding my phone, ya I have a case one that's considered heavy duty I think my phone just hit a pressure point. It's 4 years old and this is the first crack so it's not too horrendous. I thought I had a screen protector but I did not, so I might have cracked that years ago.

We (I still live with my parents) a Chicken Cutlet pizza braid. Kind of like a chicken parm calzone, minus the excess ricotta cheese. It's always really good, and I get the left overs as school lunch. :) thanks for asking.

[eclipse-song]

Do you have tips for building big salads on a budget? Since you've also mentioned that you're able to keep your grocery bill pretty low before.

hmmmm well depending on the budget you're working with and the grocery prices in your area it may or may not work! Also we may have different definitions of big salad but I'll do my best. My go to method is that my general staples that I buy every week are tomatoes and cucumber. I go through a cucumber almost every week and buy however many tomatoes I think I'm going to use (I average around 3 or 4 a week). I generally buy roma tomatoes since they're the cheapest at the store. I will also buy a head of lettuce often and chop it all up immediately when I get home and wash all of it on the spot to put in deli containers so that I have it easily accessible (ADHD method of making myself eat healthy foods). Especially with iceberg lettuce this method gives me enough to have a salad with all of those ingredients most nights of the week which makes up a big part of my meal. You can also add a red onion if you want but if I don't have one I go without. I'll usually have some other protein on the side like some fish or meat, though a container of feta cheese can last me a long while honestly. That kind of salad I'll usually use either a balsamic vinegar dressing or this one japanese salad dressing I really like that I found at a multi-cultural grocery store near me..

If you don't want lettuce though, you can also do an easy mediterranian salad (not as big but equally yummy) that's just cucumber, tomato, olive oil, lemon juice, salt, and maayyybe some parsley if you want/have any.

In the summer when it's warmer I like to make greek pasta salad also because that can last me a couple days if I make a big bowl of it and it's a lot more filling than just lettuce and veggies.

For my budget I tend to average around $150-$175 on groceries a month just for myself. I also like to buy a lot of things to help myself make stuff from scratch since in the end it's going to be a lot cheaper when I break down the costs. Some months things end up being more expensive if I'm out of the bigger stuff I buy but it's things like that that I like to make that I find really tasty.

So my staple things to keep around that are pretty cheap where I live are:

-multiple roma tomatoes -english cucumber -lettuce (iceberg is nice but romaine is sometimes cheaper and you can just make a caesar salad without the chicken or bacon if you really want to. My mom would just use the caesar dressing and croutons plus parm when we were kids and my family was on a tight budget) Things I sometimes have around but not always that you can add to these:

-red or yellow pepper (why tf are bell peppers so expensive) -red onion

[zero-insignificance]

DND Recap: Infection au?

So update the mlp arc

Cast includes:

Rose, Mark, Patrick, Alfie, Quinn, and the newest player Miss Houdini the cleric and their companion a white buffalo.

During Mark and Discord's fight Mark is absolutely kicking Discord's ass and Mark says "Just say I win and I'll spare you-" and is cut off and Discord just says "I win!" and poofs away in a cloud of bubbles. Mark shakes his head and in the afterlife Alfie says "I smell some bullshit." and Discord admits that he is doing a tactical retreat and that he underestimated Mark and that they'll fight again at a very inconvenient time for him. Mark says "he retreated. I win." and Bob says that it was a monkey's paw situation, and he gives Mark his soul back saying that he doesn't want his "dirty Philidelphia soul" and that he can keep his memories. Racist prick. Mark is about to burn Ponyville to the ground and gets the feeling he should go to the afterlife instead and hops into the portal.

Cut to Patrick, Quinn and Alfie who are making their way to Fluttershy's cottage and Alfie asks Bob if he can traverse universes that aren't a part of the whole connected universe thing and Bob says he cannot unless there is a preexisting way to get there. Alfie's just like "Damn I guess you can't dissect my corpse that's in my old universe then." "Of course not, it has to be fresh" "Well I do have my dead body from Dinkleberg" but Bob also denies this. Alfie brings up that he knows some others that he thinks he might be interested in dissecting specificaly from his old party. "Which ones?" "there's the owlin who had this parasite, that immortal clown satyr, a demon, there was that bard... Several members of royalty and nobility including that prick who killed me..." "So you're saying that you can give me a bunch of new minions?" "Pretty much." "Then why would I release you from my possession?" "I can give you them all at once. I have a list that I'm happy to give you once I'm freed." "We'll talk about this later." and he disappears and Alfie says that he really wishes Bob would stop calling him his property and Bob reappears. "Oh, dear I didn't know I was making you uncomfortable. Now poultry poultry poultry, we're more like acquaintances you and I. except I own your soul" and Alfie mumbles that he missed when his old party would just call him chicken parm and chicken nugget. "Then I guess I shall call you nugget. Tata!" and he throws a smoke bomb and books it to the Everfree forest.

We make it to Fluttershy's cottage and it's surrounded by a thick purple smoke. Alfie tries to clear the smoke with his wings and it does not move. He pulls out a fishing rod and attaches a steak to it and casts it into smoke. The steak comes out a perfect medium rare. Patrick groans "oh come on you ruined a perfectly good steak, it's got mud on it!" "oh, that steak was on its last legs-" and then it grows legs. "Are you okay little guy?" questions Alfie. "NEVAH BETTAH!" in a New York accent and Alfie removes the hook, and the steak is freed. It runs into the Everfree forest, and we hear a very high-pitched scream from Bob as he is pursued by the steak. "AHHHH GET AWAY FROM ME GET AWAY FROM ME!" "AAAYYE WHAT'S THE MATTAH PRETTY, BOY? WHY YOU RUNNIN? AIN'T YOU EVAH SEE A STEAK WITH LEGS?"

Mark meets us at Fluttershy's cottage with Twilight and Alfie say we have to get in there and save Fluttershy. Twilight tells Mark that he will be banned from Ponyville and gives Alfie a permanent library card cuz we are chill now and Alfie does a happy dance "You're not neurotypical are you?" "What gave that away?" "the happy stimming- wait who's Fluttershy" and dread washes over Alfie's face.

Alfie: That mother fucker. I SWEAR TO GOD IF HE KILLED FLUTTERSHY-"

Patrick: But she already dead.

Alfie: Well then we resurrect her.

Patrick: Would that work on a spirit?

Alfie: I DIED AND WASN'T REVIVIFIED.

Patrick: WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DIED?

Alfie: I MENTIONED THIS BEFORE- *sighs* In my old world I was power word killed and became a lost soul for I don't even know how long and there are things in the In-Between that I don't like to talk about. There was a weak point in the fabric of reality, and I popped into this universe and Mark found me. I wasn't revived and I'm alive.

Twilight: WHAT ARE YOU EVEN TALKING ABOUT? WHO IS FLUTTERSHY?

Alfie shows her pictures of Fluttershy in the Filly Vanilli episode turned comic book and Twilight doesn't know her. "What are the elements of harmony and who are they bound to?" and Twilight lists them stopping at kindness, saying that they haven't found someone who is bound to the element of kindness.

"That piece of shit" and from the cottage we hear a familiar laugh of the gnome who was the false hydra. A fire is lit in Mark's eyes. He was going to the door and Bob appears and says "Ah ah ah! I figured you could use this." and turns around and pulls out a 6'3" Eladrin elf woman. And she is pink and fluffy with a white buffalo that is covered in pink bows.

Mark says "move I have a gnome to kill." and the Eladrin is like "hold on I don't think that's a good idea-" and Alfie shouts "FAMILY MEETING." and everyone freezes. "THAT INCLUDES YOU." pointing to the Eladrin. "SIT YOUR ASSES DOWN." and levels an intense stare at each party member plus Twilight until they sit down, and we are all in a circle.

Alfie starts clipping everyone together with carabiners and bungee cords saying he will not have another "Forest of fears situation."

The Eladrin raises her hand. "I think I should probably introduce myself to ya'll. My name is Miss Houdini and I'm a healer."

"We need a game plan. Mark can you use Echo to clear the smoke?" it doesn't work the smoke grows bigger. Miss Houdini cuts in "I heard something about a false hydra? In all my years I believe that murder is not the answer. Let me try to talk with it" "How old are you? "I will not answer that question." "Okay understandable just know that if you fail I will stab it or cast multiple fireballs at it."

Alfie then consults Hank the orb asking what the smoke is. It's pure chaos magic. There's no way of knowing what will happen to us but we have to take the risk. The balance of an entire realm is at stake. Alfie also asks what a false hydra's weaknesses are. Hank has no answer. "Is he okay or is the orb magic?" Miss Houdini asks, and Mark responds with 'Oh it's magic. It talks telepathically. You have to touch it to hear it." "Do I want to?" Patrick interjects with "THAT ORB IS A BITCH." and Miss Houdini hesitantly places a hand on the orb and is told to roll a wisdom check. Nat 1. A voice booms throughout the party's heads.

"YOU ARE NOT WORTHY, YOU'RE WORSE THAN THE TWINK."

"NO I'M THE WORSt- WAIT A FUCKING MINUTE-"

Alfie puts Hank away and thanks him for the infromation.

We all enter the smoke and the DM says to roll a d100.

Mark grows an additional 4 limbs and his speed is halved because the new legs haven't been used before. Alfie's strength is now a 3 for the next 3 hours. If Patrick rolls a nat 20 it is treated as a 19. Miss Houdini becomes an alicorn the size of Celestia. Other than that she is fine but the DM tells her to roll a d4 because the number she rolled causes one member to have the effects of confusion. Alfie is the unlucky winner. He is now confused, weak and very tipsy. He crashes into Miss Houdini, and she lifts him onto the Buffalo "oh you poor thing...'" and Alfie slurs out "you're so sweet- omigosh you're so soft!" and he starts petting the buffalo. Twilight stutters out "what is happening to all of-" and she devolves into speaking giant. Alfie can make out what she's saying only because he speaks autism not to be confused with Autism Speaks.

We enter the cottage, and we see the gnome on a throne with an egg.

"Well well well..."

"What did you do to Fluttershy- you look shorter than last time..." Alfie slurs.

"Just a light transferring of consciousness." and then the buffalo starts peeing on the hardwood floor. The gnome is disgusted but keeps playing the whole "I'm the BBEG I'm going to make you fight the sweetest character you'll ever know" card and sinks into the ground laughing.

The egg starts to hatch and this comes out of it:

Fluttershy grows five more heads and lets out labored breaths becoming the Flutterhydra.

Alfie just starts crying and is like "WHAT DID THEY DO TO YOOUUUUU? Wait didn't you say you were going to try and talk to it?" and Miss Houdini starts to talk to the Flutterhydra and offers her a bow which she accepts, and Patrick tries to summon Discord.

"It's Beetlejuice rules" says the DM.

Two names are spoken thrice unbroken. Both Discord and Beetlejuice are summoned, and Alfie just says "I love that musical..."

Discord was clearly taking a shower before being summoned and Patrick is like "Soooooo we don't know how to deal with this. Can you turn her back?" "Only once she is out of the afterlife."

"Now sugar can you walk?" Fluttershy lets out a raspy "No."

"Well that's okay we can carry you there I got some friends that are willing to help." and Fluttershy seems unsure.

I don't remember how but Miss Houdini brings up revenge and all of the Flutterhydra's heads turn to face Mark.

"MARK YOU SHOULD PROBABLY START RUNNING!" shouts Patrick and Alfie starts crying even harder.

Mark turns to Alfie and gives him his bag of holding, and his sword Echo. Alfie cries even harder saying that he can't lose him too. Not like this and he is helpless to stop this. And Mark turns to the Flutterhydra and kneels before her.

"If my death will make you feel better... If it'll fix it... Then do it." The heads go to strike him in sync and time freezes.

We're all aware and able to move and from behind the Flutterhydra steps Will Smith from YouTube Rewind.

"Aw shit. It's rewind time."

Time itself splinters and reforms rewinding back further and further until we are back to where we started when we first came to Equestria. Gorg is not with us, but Miss Houdini is along with her companion. We're back to normal in our original forms.

"Hi! Welcome to Equestria!" Alfie hops down from the buffalo and shakes Spike's hand "It's excellent to meet you Spike for the first time ever."

Mark: Can you fly?

Spike: no, I can't.

Alfie: You will eventually.

Mark: Would you like to?

Alfie: Mark I will kill you.

Spike: You're saying you can make me fly as high as the pegasi and alicorns?

Mark: Yes

Mark golf clubs Spike with Gorg's hammer and he lands in the Ponyville square fountain and from the heavens we hear

HOLE IN ONE

and then Mark summons Discord.

Mark: DISCORD DO YOU REMEMBER ANYTHING.

Discord: Ugh yes, I remember. Will Smith's power doesn't work on me.

Mark: Oh. Uh are we good?

Discord: *disgruntled noises* I suppose we are... GOODBYE! *disappears in a cloud of bubbles*

Alfie: WAIT I HAVE SOMETHING TO TELL YOU ABOUT FLUTTERSHY!

*the bubbles coalesce back into Discord's form*

Discord: Yes?

Alfie: You and I both know that you have feelings for her. I can tell you when you should pop the question.

Discord: Do tell.

Alfie: After Twilight's first pupil graduates ask her out.

Alfie has to talk with Twilight in the next session about research things.

[clariongradiation]

Resippy

sauce

1/2 white or yellow onion

red and green bell pepper

as much garlic as you want

salt, pepper, olive oil

flour

milk

8oz package cream cheese

Chop onion and bell peppers to small size, peel and mince garlic. In a big pan saute onion with salt, pepper, and olive oil until translucent, then add garlic and cook until good garlic smell. Add bell peppers and cook until they're just starting to get soft. Sprinkle in 3 (ish) tablespoons of flour and stircook until its evenly distributed among the veggies. Add milk a little at a time, stirring and letting it thicken between each addition (gonna be honest I did not measure the milk, you wanna have like four cups of sauce at least). Once everything is saucy and warm, add the cream cheese and stir it in until combined

other stuff

9 lasagna noodles

1 bag spinch (I think the popeye ones are 15oz)

2 cans artichoke hearts, I get the pre-quartered ones

tub of ricotta cheese

2 cup bag of shredded mozzarella

2 cup bag of shredded parmesan (I got a package of mixed parm/asiago/romano cuz I was feeling fancy)

more olive oil

While sauce is cooking put a pot of salted water on to boil. When it starts bubbling stuff your spinach into it (I happen to have a metal strainer that fits into my pot perfectly, so I can put the spinach in there and just pull it out with the strainer. If this does not work for you, you can just pour it into a strainer like normal). Cook for a minute or so until the spinach is wilted, then drain and squeeze it to get as much water out as you can. Then boil the noodles (make sure you have plenty of salted water so they don't stick together) until al dente. Drain those too, rinse with cold water so they dont cook more, and toss them in a tiny bit of olive oil to help them not stick together. Also drain ur artichokes at some point

draw the rest of the owl

Preheat oven to 375F. In a 9 × 13 inch baking pan, pour a little olive oil and use a paper towel to spread it around and coat the sides/bottom. Scoop 1/4 of your sauce into the baking pan and spread it over the bottom. At this point I added my drained spinach to the unused sauce so it would get mixed in and evenly distributed

Lay 3 noodles over the sauce in the baking pan to make your first layer. Then scoop 1/3 of the remaining sauce/spinach mixture and spread it evenly over the noodles. Top that with 1/3 of the artichoke hearts, some scoops of ricotta, and 1/3 of both shredded cheeses. Then do another layer of noodles, sauce, artichokes/ricotta/cheeses. Then add your last 3 noodles, the last of your sauce, the remaining artichokes, and more shredded cheeses

Cover the baking dish with tinfoil, be sure you tent it up so the foil doesn't touch the cheese. Bake for 45 min (if you want a brown top, take the foil off for the last 10 minutes or so) and try not to immediately eat the whole thing

(I like this w/o meat but you could probably add some bacon or ham or chicken or tofu if you wanna have more protein!)

I made spinach and artichoke dip but in lasagna form and proceeded to eat almost half the pan

[finnofamerica]

One Powerful Motivator - Bucky Barnes x Reader | Smut

Summary: Bucky gets jealous when another man puts his hands on his property.

Word Count: 2,993

Date Posted: 08.21.2022

TW: Choking, Breeding, Bondage, Orgasm Control, Praise.

Note: This is a D/s fic, please do not try ANYTHING that you read without doing the proper research or getting the proper training. It is extremely important that you do not accidentally hurt someone. Remember that kink is customizable and there is no right way to do it as long as you’re keeping safe. We play here by Safe, Sane, and Consensual, but there is also Risk Aware Consensual Kink, and Personal Responsibility, Informed Consensual Kink. Don’t yuck anyone’s yum, I am willing to answer any questions that I can.

🔞MINORS DO NOT INTERACT🔞

|| Masterlist || Request Here || Ask Me Stuff || Request by Anon(s)

B: Don’t forget about our play date later. 

Bucky sent you that text early this morning, reminding you of your plans to meet up. The thought of what he had planned shot heat through you. You had to push the thought away as you got prepared for your work day, the freezing winter morning setting you right. 

The day passed slowly as you kept checking the clock every twenty minutes, wanting the day to be over from the moment it began. 

J: Girls night! 

The text from Jade came through. Shit, You thought, I totally forgot. You texted Bucky, telling him of your mistake. 

B: Have fun! I’ll pick you up from the club at 8, I don’t want you driving. DO. NOT. GET. DRUNK.

Y/n: Yes, Sir. 

B: Good girl

You were practically vibrating with excitement. Yet, somehow you think that Bucky planned your play date on girls night purposely.

You’d met Bucky over a year ago by accident. Quite literally by accident. You spilt your drink on him at your office’s annual holiday party. It just so happens that you’re actually really good friends with the boss’s personal assistant Jade, and the two of you conspired to get the party hosted at a local club. A favorite club of the two of you, that you frequented for your monthly girls night with Eve from accounting. Turns out accounting girls party hard. She could out drink you most of the time. 

- Over a Year Ago - 

“God,” You gagged, half hiding behind Jade, “Adam from IT will not stop flirting with me.” 

“What do you have against the IT boys?” Evelyn laughed, another mini-shot of rum into a cup full of coke. 

“I don’t have anything against them, it’s just that Adam never showers! You’re lucky he doesn’t hang out at your desk every chance he gets. Anytime he has to deal with an IT issue for us he always stops at my desk for like a half hour after. He smells like a gym sock.” You whined. 

“Thank god HR can’t hear you.” Jade chuckled, “Oh wait, you are HR.” 

“And yet, you’d think Adam would be more aware of the sexual harassment policy.” Eve handed you the spiked drink. 

“Yeah, and I can’t get him fired because he’s our boss’s son. Stupid fucking rich people. Fuck that’s strong, Eve, I’m not built like you!” 

“God, I can’t stand Carver.” Jade snorted. “But he pays me too fucking much for me to quit.” 

“Yeah don’t remind me that you’re the most over paid person here.” 

“Do you want to get calls at two in the morning to help him with his B.S? Cus I’ll trade.” 

“Nope!” You and Eve said at the same time. You wouldn’t wish Jade’s job on anyone, for any reason. 

“I’m gonna go get food from the bar.” You dismissed yourself from your friends, taking your drink with you. 

“Y/n,” The bartender greeted you with a smile. “Your usual?” 

“Hey Dave!” You grinned, “I would but I have to be on my best behavior tonight.” 

He chuckled at your little pretend pout. “Ah, you’re with the Obrams party.” 

“Correct, so it’s soda sippin’ for me. Anyway I need some food, you got mozz sticks? Tell me you got mozz sticks.” 

“Don’t worry, Girl, I got your Mozz sticks, I’ll even get them garlic parm like you like.” 

“You’re the love of my life Dave.” 

“They’ll be up in 10, I’ll put them on the Obrams’ tab for you.” 

“Beautiful.” 

You turned away from the bar, hardly taking a step before slamming into a thick sturdy chest, spilling your rum and coke all over this poor man’s pristine white t-shirt. 

“Fuck me, I’m not even drunk!” You whined. Today was just not it for you. 

“I’m sure that wasn’t an invitation,” The person in front of you chuckled, causing you to actually look up at him. Fit chest ran up to a beautiful bitable neck, all the way up probably the most handsome face you’d ever seen. Blood rushed to your cheeks, feeling much more embarrassed than you would’ve been had you ran into, say, Adam from IT. 

“Hi,” You whimpered, unable to look away from his hypnotizing blue eyes. 

“Hi,” He grinned, clearly enjoying being able to look down at you. “How about you buy me a drink as an apology.” 

You nodded, turning back to the counter, staring at Dave with big eyes. The sentiment was clear, how fucked am I. Dave shook his head with a fond smile. 

“One sec, Darlin, I’ll be right back to you.” 

The man took a seat at the bar next to where you stood, “I’m Bucky.” 

“Y/n,” You shook his hand, taking notice of his tattoo sleeve, “Listen, I am absolutely mortified right now.” 

“Well, it’s hell of an ice breaker.” He chucked. “Not to sound like an over used pick up line, but do you come here often?” 

You rolled your eyes, “I don’t know if I should answer that, what if you’re a stalker?” 

“You’re on first name basis with the bartender, so you either come here often, or  you’re one of those annoying people who addresses the staff by their names.”  He joked. 

“Okay, you got me, I’m one of those annoying people,” You joked back. “I like your tattoo sleeve.” 

“Thank you,” He rolled up the sleeve of his tee to show off as much of it as he could. It was incredibly detailed piece, and your realized that they were clockwork flowers. They were stunning. 

“May I?” You asked, tentatively reaching out your hands. 

“Go ahead.” 

You were extremely gentle as you traced the work, feeling some scar tissue underneath the negative space. 

“I’ve always wanted to get a tattoo, but I could never find the time.” You told him, more or less thinking out loud. 

“You should,” He looked at you. You could swear somehow he was checking you out without looking like he was checking you out. “Some ink would look good on you.” 

You could feel your skin heating up at his words. 

“Y/n,” Dave interrupted, drawing your attention, “Your sticks aren’t up for another couple of minutes did you need something else?” 

“Yes, I’m gonna by this man a drink, and I, uh, spilt my coke, could you get me another one please?” 

“Of course, girl, should’ve figured it was all over that man’s shirt,” The bartender teased, turning to Bucky, “Listen you don’t want nothin to do with her, she crazy.” 

“Dave!” You squealed, shocked at his antics. 

“I don’t know, I’m always up for a challenge.” Bucky didn’t take his eyes off of you. Dave looked at you like, Girl you’re in trouble. “I’ll take a rum and coke, seeing as I’m covered in one anyway.” 

You pushed yourself onto one of the stools, making yourself comfortable. You figured the girls wouldn’t miss you for a little while longer. You and Bucky spent the rest of that party talking, and boy did you really like him. You liked him so much that you gave him your number that night. 

It didn’t take long for casual conversation to turn into something more. When you learned that power that Bucky could hold over you, the power that you wanted to give him, it was addictive. It took many discussions of likes, dislikes, limits, desires for you and Bucky to find something that truly worked for you. 

- Present Day - 

You and your girls found a table off to the side in the crowded club where you spent most of the last hour and a half unwinding from the work day. You were taking it slow, following Bucky’s orders to not get drunk, but that didn’t mean you couldn’t enjoy the fuzzy warmth that the milkshake-like drink spread through you. 

“I wanna dance,” Eve grabbed your hand pulling you away from the table. 

“Eve, I am not nearly drunk enough to dance.” 

“You may no be, but I am and I need someone to dance with so your sexy ass is coming with me.” 

You laughed and rolled your eyes, joining Eve on the dance floor. You got lost in the music as you danced together, not really paying attention even as another body joined yours, or perhaps that was the alcohol. You let yourself relax, to be honest, you enjoyed the feeling of being sandwiched between the two warm bodies. 

Suddenly you were ripped away from between them, lips smashing against yours. Your urge was to shove whomever it was away and then you caught it. The familiar smell of one James Buchanan Barnes. You melted into him, returning his kiss with fervor, arms winding their way around his neck. His hands roamed your body, groping you ass over your skirt. Behind you you could hear a man scoff, and presumably move on to the next available target. 

“If you’ll excuse us, Eve,” Bucky pulled away, leaving you panting. “We have plans tonight.” 

“Of course, Handsome,” Eve play flirted from behind you, “As long as you keep bringing her back in one piece.” 

“My bag,” You whispered, “I’ll grab it, just give me a minute.” 

You rushed back over to the table, making sure to give Jade enough money to cover your drinks, before Bucky could haul you back to his apartment. 

He had a scowl on his face during the drive. 

“I may have to cancel play time, Doll.” Bucky said, frustration latent in his voice. 

“Did I upset you, Sir?” You asked, fiddling with your hands, “I obeyed all your rules. I didn’t get drunk.” 

“Yes, but that man’s hands were all over you, and you were letting him touch my property.” 

“I’m sorry, Sir, I thought the dancing was innocent enough.” 

“He certainly didn’t - the way he was feeling you up.” Bucky growled - and not in the sexy way. You fiddled with your collar, a symbol of your commitment to him. 

“Sir, may I make a suggestion,” he gave you a nod, “We could take a bath, relax.” 

He let out a sigh, “Yes, that sounds nice.” 

Bucky seemed satisfied for the time, though you could practically see his racing thoughts. You reached over taking his hand that was resting on the car’s emergency brake. He held it lightly, and you knew that he truly was not mad at you. 

He started stripping the moment his front door was closed and locked, b-lining for the master bath. Bucky sat on the edge of the tub as if filled, giving you plenty of opportunity to admire the beautiful work of his tattoo. 

“Strip and kneel.” He stated, though not coldly. Your eyes never left him as you did as he requested, unbuttoning your blouse slowly, letting it fall from your shoulders. Next was your skirt, undoing the zipper just enough to let it slide over your hips, pooling at your feet. 

“All the way, Doll.” 

You turned away from Bucky, reaching behind you to unclasp your bra, letting that too fall to the floor. You pulled your panties down seductively, giving your Sir a good show of your ass. You faced him again, taking to your knees in front of him, if you just leaned forward, you could kiss his thighs. 

Bucky cupped your chin, stroking your face softly, his other hand went to your throat, playing with the ring on your collar. Tentatively, you leaned forward to rest your cheek on his knee.

“You are my sweet doll,” He petted your head, “aren’t you, pretty girl?” 

You nodded, smiling softly.  You could feel the soft haze of submission setting into place. You trusted Bucky more than your trusted anyone in your life, you knew without a shadow of a doubt that you were safe in his hands. 

“You know that no matter how frustrated or angry I may be at one time, I still love you. You’re my good girl.” 

“Of course, Sir, I love you too.” You responded dreamily, enjoying his touch, only for it to be interrupted by him turning off the water. He helped you into the bath, settling himself in behind you. He held you tightly, and you could feel his frustrations slipping away with the steam. 

Ten minutes passed without a word, it wasn’t needed, you were just enjoying your time with him. 

“Do you still want to play tonight with Sir, Doll?” Bucky asked in your ear, his voice deep and playful. One of his hands reaching down, just barely brushing your clit. 

“Yes, Sir, if you’re feeling up to it.” You nodded. 

“Get out of the bath, Doll. Dry off. Go to the bed and play with yourself. I will join you in a few. You are not allowed to cum.” 

You didn’t need any other direction, you were up the moment he asked. You dried yourself hastily, leaving the towel for him. You picked out your favorite vibrating wand, plugging it in and settling on the bed. You lost yourself in the pleasant vibration, making sure to have your legs pleasingly spread open when you heard Bucky emerge from the bathroom, the tub draining loudly. Bucky took his time with his approach, letting your heart flutter with anticipation. 

Bucky reached over, taking the vibrator from you, shutting it off and setting it aside. 

“Move to the middle of the bed, Doll.” 

You did as he said, then let him take over adjusting you. Bucky pulled the ankle cuffs from under the bed skirt, fastening each to your ankles. 

“How’s that? Good?” He asked, making sure that they were snug, but not so tight as to hurt you. 

“Yes Sir.” You nodded, admiring the way he looked while he was strapping you down. 

“Hands above your head, Doll,” He directed, moving to get the wrist restraints. He strapped you in, repeating his question from before. 

“Its good, Sir.” 

“That’s a good little doll,” He praised you, slipping a blindfold over your eyes. Your breath hitched when you felt him take one of your nipples into his mouth, sucking and biting the pert bud, massaging your other breast in his hands, playing with the nipple. 

A sharp pain took your nipple that was just in your lover’s mouth, making you cry out, panting as wetness flooded you. Bucky lavished your other nipple with his tongue, followed by that same sharp pain that made you whimper pathetically.

He kissed down your body, loving every inch of your skin, until he finally kissed your clit. The contact made you gasp, sending a shock of pain through your chest as it jostled whatever Bucky had attached to you. Bucky took his time eating you out, enjoying the little whimpers you let out from the torturous devices he affixed to your nipples. 

“Remember, Doll, you are not allowed to cum until I tell you to. Is that understood?” 

“Yes, Sir, I understand,” You whimpered and moaned under his ministrations. Though you could feel yourself getting close to the edge, and you knew that Bucky knew it too. 

“Sir,” You whined, “I need you to stop, I’m gonna-“ 

Bucky issues a swift smack to you clit, the shock holding you off from your orgasm. 

“So wet for me, Doll,” Bucky praised. You could feel the tip of his thick cock pressing against your entrance. “Such a good girl.” 

He leaned in to kiss you. You could taste yourself on his lips as he finally penetrated you, moving slow as you stretched to accommodate him. 

“Fuck,” He groaned against your lips, “always so tight for me, such a perfect little doll.” 

His hand crept to your throat as he began pumping into you. He didn’t choke you at first, just traced the band of your collar, but as he fucked into you roughly he cut off that blood rush to your brain. Keeping his hand in a ‘U’ shape to keep from hurting you. 

You were putty underneath him, moaning from the pleasure he was giving you, whimpering from the pain in your breasts every time he thrusted into you. You gripped his arm as his hand tightened around your throat restricting your air flow. 

“Sir,” You coughed out, getting wetter by the second. You could hear how sloppy your pussy was as he pounded into you. 

“You’l’ breathe when I fucking tell you you can breathe,” He growled in your ear, making you moan. You loved it when Bucky got rough with you, and he knew it. “God, I’m gonna breed this perfect cunt of yours, Doll.” 

You whimpered underneath him, as he released your neck. The blood rushing back to your brain made you dizzy. 

“You come when I tell you to, Doll,” He demanded, counting you down. When he hit one, he pulled the devices off of your nipples, making you cry out in pain as your orgasm rushed over you. Bucky groaned in you ear as his thrusts got sloppy, the feeling of you clenching around his cock pushing him over the edge, spilling his hot seed into you. 

His weight was heavy as he rested on you for a moment, panting. Reaching up he undid your wrist restraints with one hand, allowing you to remove the blindfold yourself. When he pulled out of you, you could feel his cum spill down on to the mattress. 

“I’m gonna get you cleaned up, Doll,” He promised as he undid your ankle restraints, “You did so well for me.” 

You relaxed in your happy haze as Bucky got a warm towel, and cleaned you up gently. Once finished, he climbed back in bed with you, holding you close to his chest. He rubbed your back, praising you softly as you came back to reality. 

“How’s your throat doll? You okay?” He asked, caressing your cheek. 

“Mhmm.” You nodded, “Can I have a pudding?” 

“Yes, you can have a pudding for being a good girl.” He kissed your forehead.

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