#i still feel like i don't know what i'm doing 95% of the time
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ectonurites · 2 years ago
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I love your Henry el art! do you have any digital painting tips? Do you physically brush stroke over and over the same spots like you would with traditional art? I can never wrap my head around digital painting but I want to get better at it! I just don’t know how to blend or get that nice painterly look where you see strokes and it’s not so flat :(
first of all thank you!!! and oh god okay. trying to explain this stuff is hard kjhgjkh
I do definitely like, work over the same areas in a way tht i think is vaguely reminiscent of traditional painting—wait wait ok here's like. a few different stages along the way tht i'd saved things at on a different piece (bc on the el & henry one i didn't save at too many points along the way):
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[Also i usually do most of my painting-style stuff as a value study in black & white (or sometimes a fun different color & white. to spice things up) which i then color on top of with an assortment of blending layers, then do some little touch ups on after merging it all together. which is why this is in b&w but the final version i'd posted is not]
but so it's like. a lot of working and reworking the same areas and utilizing the fact that with a digital painting you CAN select certain pieces and move them around/resize them (within reason, if you do it too drastically with the resizing then the quality gets fucky. but normally even after i resize something i'll paint back over it at the new size to help compensate for that/refine it).
in terms of the strokes and how visible/not visible they are, i think that's something where just... you experiment with brushes & pen pressure to be able to achieve certain things? (I personally use the DAUB brush set, overall there's LOTS of fun stuff in here & i had bought it in the first place bc it's what comic artist Belén Ortega uses and i always love the texture of her linework. but if you don't want to buy brushes there's definitely LOTS of great free ones out there to play around with). The brush I specifically use for this kind of thing is like a 'watery acrylic' so it's got some texture to it and blends things a bit but still loads new paint onto each stroke.
I'm sorry if none of that is particularly helpful though, but like the main thing is just practicing and experimenting until you find things that work for you! it's something that like... can take a lot of time & effort to get the hang of!!
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medicinemane · 3 months ago
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At least I could disable the suggestions but just... I'm sick of it, I'm sick of companies trying to think for me
I'd rather be miserable but doing shit my own way than placid and glass eyed and just taking whatever companies tell me to
Like... literally just asking what I get out of writing a post on tumblr... zero suggestions, just letting me say whatever dumb stuff comes to my head
#the problem is that doing things my way is actually working well; it's just really slow and it's coming from a bad starting point#everything that makes me miserable was even more miserable growing up#you maybe see me and think that I'm doing really horribly; and that may be true; but I'm also truthfully at my peak right now#and frankly as much as I worry about it A LOT; I'm kinda still on the rise in a lot of ways#...I just take way too long to do things; I want to be quicker because a lot of this stuff isn't... it's not being slow and steady#it's being depressed and having trouble working on shit#but... when I do stuff my way the end result tends to be strong#I got a house in 2019 for instance... like in that economy; I feel like that counts as a pretty high roll outcome; you know?#the parts of my life I hate are all... it's like Marley in the Christmas Carol; I've got all these chains around me#and... about 80% of those chains are just my mom or my mom's choices... she blows through so much money all the time#it makes me want to die#but all that shit... it's the past haunting me and drowning me#but shit's better than it was and... I have more friends now that I did in the past; I'm closer to making money than I've been in the past#(part of it is that I kinda want to get shit stabilized in the household; be doing stuff like cooking before I try and sell shit)#(also understand that everyone in high school liked me... we just never saw each other outside of school)#(so it was a situation where I had 'friends'; by that standard everyone at school was a friend)#(but I didn't have a single person I was close with and I was totally isolated in a crowd)#(friend is just a word in english that has to cover a really really wide range of relationships)#(but these days I do have actual friends... just a shame none of us live in the same town... or even state; you know?)#(I like all the people I went to high school with; they all cared a lot and were very bad at it)#(couldn't figure out that like... just give me some company; that's a good 80% of what I'm lacking)#(...I think part of it was they were all stoners and I wasn't; so they felt like... eh... like something something)#(and when I say all stoners I mean... I think... easily 80% of the school; probably 90% and maybe higher were all stoners)#(it uh... was not an easy thing for the staff; cause they obviously all knew; but... figuring out how to best handle it)#(like hell; I wouldn't want to deal with that)#(also like 95% were smokers... you have to understand that most of these kids were rich kids)#(off the top of my head I can only think of 2 other kids who were poor... just... uh...)#(if I named the city the school was in; you'd probably be like 'oh... makes sense')#(I liked everyone there; everyone liked me... just... they were very bad at just basic stuff like spending time together)#(eh... you don't need to hear more)
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theladygazingatemptiness · 2 months ago
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#wak#negative /#tag vent /#man.. why is everything so draining#like.. fr it seems like I can't do Anything for an extended amount of time without burning out and wanting to quit#like. when I was little it was my absolute dream to be able to do nothing but draw all day every day but#now as an adult the thought of it stresses me out and makes me sick to my stomach#I used to get so excited about getting commissions but#now every time I see that someone's commissioned me I just dread doing it as if it's something I'm getting graded for in two days#(note that this isn't a slight against people who've commed me by any means. if you've commed me you're a saint)#(but. that's just how I feel and I wish it wasn't)#which is why comms are closed rn and idk when I'm opening them back up#rn I'm doing commission-based editing/proofreading work for a small publishing comp#something that I Also once aspired to do full-time#but.. I'm already kinda getting tired of it? probably bc my current project is 140+ pages that I have to get done in two weeks#like.. it's not Bad and I'm not quitting (I don't have a choice anyway. this is the closest thing I have rn to a consistent-ish job)#but it.. just gets less fun w every manuscript and I hate that#and like... whenever I go out no matter where I am I just want to go back home#I have no 'dream job' anymore. I have no goals. I don't want to go places or do things I just want to be home sleeping#but. as we all know that's not an option in the capitalist hellscape we live in#hell... even if we Didn't live in the hellscape it probably still wouldn't be an option lol#and of course my mom will not hear any of it and just thinks I'm being spoiled and lazy and 'using my aut as an excuse'#and most people including supposed '''''leftists'''' would probably agree with her too#bc 95% of '''"radical communists''''' on here are Adults Aren't Allowed To Exist Outside Of Working And That's How Things Should Be truther#who vocally treat unemployment as a moral failing and as a Bad Person Trait™ inbetween making Capitalism Bad posts#but I'm getting offtopic. Maybe I Am Useless And Lazy And A Leech Or Etc#but what I'm trying to say is I feel like I'm going to be miserable and feel like just a machine no matter what I do#and like I'm never going to have a happy or fulfilling life#and that my only option is to go to sleep never wake up and hope I'm reborn with no mental illnesses or trauma and into a rich family#but.. fat chance.
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ohara-n-brown · 1 year ago
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As a late diagnosed autist I will say one of the most damaging but transformative experiences I've ever had was being misdiagnosed with BPD.
Everyday my heart goes out to people with BPD.
The amount of stigma and silencing they face is astonishing and sickening.
I took DBT for years. Therapists use to turn me away because of my diagnosis.
I would be having full blown autistic meltdowns, crying for help literally - but because I was labeled as BPD ANY time I cried I was treated as manipulative and unstable.
As if the only reason I could be crying was if I was out to trick someone.
95% of the books out there with Borderline in the title are named shit like 'How to get away from a person with Borderline', 'How to stop walking on eggshells (with a person who has BPD)'
I was never allowed to feel true pain or panic or need.
That was 'attention seeking behavior', not me asking for help when a disability was literally inhibiting my ability to process emotions.
There were dozens of times where I had a full meltdown and was either threatened with institutionalization or told I was doing it for attention.
My failing relationships weren't due to a communication issue, or the inability to read social cues. No, because I was labeled borderline, my unstable relationships were my fault. Me beggong nuerotypicals to just be honest and blunt with what they meant was me pestering them for validation.
Borderline patients can't win.
And the funny thing is - I asked my therapist about autism. I told her I thought I was on the spectrum.
BPD is WILDLY misdiagnosed with those with autism and I had many clear signs.
Instead - she told me 'If you were autistic we wouldn't be able to have this conversation'. She made me go through a list of autistic traits made clearly for children, citing how I didn't fit each one.
And then she told me that me identifying with the autism community was the BPD making me search for identity to be accepted - and that I wasn't autistic, just desperate to fit in somewhere.
I didn't get diagnosed for another ten years. For ten years I avoided the autism community - feeling as if I were just a broken person who wanted to steal from people who 'really needed it'.
Because of my providers - I began to doubt my identity MORE, not less.
Ten years of thinking I was borderline and being emotionally neglected and demonized by a system meant to help me.
To this day, I still don't trust neurotypicals. Not fully.
I know I'm not borderline now - but my heart aches for them. Not for the usual stuff. But for the stigma. And the asshole doctors. And the dismissiveness and threatening and the idea of institutionalization hanging over their head.
I love Borderline people. I always will. I'm not Borderline but if you are I love you and I'm sorry.
You're not a bad person. You're not a therapists worst nightmare, you are a human with valid feelings and fears.
Borderline people I'm sorry.
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sophiamcdougall · 1 year ago
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I am never going to complain about Greek Duolingo again
I mean, I am. But still.
So, as some of you know, my family has been coming to this tiny Greek seaside village for several years. Just over a week ago I came out here with my mum, under the impression that early September, after the height of the summer heat, would be a good time to have a holiday. ANYWAY Storm Daniel had other ideas about that. Locally things are improving (I'm actually really pissed off about the disaster-porn tone of most English-language media coverage, but that's another post). The power is back on, there's running water most of the time, and though the latter is not drinkable, a truck from the government came and handled out free bottled water yesterday. But we are currently kind of stuck. Can't do tourist things. Can't go home. There aren't any local flights out until Saturday and the road to Thessaloniki is still closed.
So this evening, feeling kind of aimless and depressed, I go down to the nearest beach with a couple of binbags and start cleaning up in an effort to at least do something positive. I always try to do this at least once out here and obviously, after the storm, there's a lot more plastic and rubbish than usual.
At some point I find this large, round bit of metal - some kind of machinery part, I think -- that's too big for the bag, so I take it to the bins on its own, leaving the rubbish bag on the beach. And when I come back for it, something among the stones beside it moves.
Specifically, it pulls its head sharply inside its shell
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So, meanwhile I've been trying to learn some Greek with the help of Duolingo.
I currently have a 33-day streak and... I have questions. Shouldn't I be able to use the past or future tenses by now? Shouldn't I be able to say "x is like y"? I can't do those things. But one thing I absolutely can say all day long is έχω μια χελώνα : I have a turtle.
This is far from the limit of Duolingo Greek's turtle-related content. "An obsession with turtles" is my mother's characterisation. I can inform you that the turtle is not a bird, and, improbably, that the turtle is drinking milk. I can introduce you to a turtle in company with a horse and an elephant. As far as Duolingo is concerned, it really is turtles all the way down.
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Now this, you may be able to see, is not a turtle. It has claws rather than flippers. It is a tortoise. I know there are wild tortoises in Greece: my aunt once rescued a pair of them shagging in the middle of the road -- but that was up in the mountains. I've even seen one myself, but it was also on a road and very dead.
I am 95% certain they don't belong on beaches. There's nothing for it to eat, except, unfortunately, a lot of plastic. Even if it gets off the beach it will immediately find itself on a road where it could get hit by a car. I'm pretty sure it must have been washed down by the floodwater and has been just sitting there, dazed, ever since.
Now obviously the first thing I want to do on encountering this unusual animal is to go and tell my mummy, so I do. The tortoise immediately brightens her day. She agrees that the tortoise is not happy on the beach and needs to be taken somewhere safe. it gets surprisingly wriggly when picked up so we put it in a carrier bag with some grapes and cucumber and go looking for somewhere to rehome it.
We find a path leading up between the houses towards a likely-looking field, but before we get very far a dog in a yard goes berserk and a man's head pops over a fence and demands to know what we're doing. He does this in English, as evidently we're just that obviously tourists.
"I found a tortoise on the beach!" I explain. "We want to find somewhere to put it."
"A what," he asks.
"It's like a, you know," I begin and then to my astonishment I find myself saying... "μια χελώνα"
"Oh! A turtle!" he says.
"But from the land. δεν είναι χελώνα", [it is not a turtle,] I say, as I am worried he will tell me to put it back near the sea where I found it. As it turns out it actually IS a χελώνα, Greek does not distinguish between turtles and tortoises, but I don't know that; I can't even name the days of the week or identify any colours other than pink yet, give me a break.
The man's entire demeanour changes and thaws. He does not worry about my turtle-that-is-not-a-turtle conundrum. He knows where οι χελώνες come from and where η χελώνα μας belongs. He leads us through a gate into a courtyard area.
"[somethingsomething] μια χελώνα," he explains to the assembled onlookers, of whom there are, suddenly, a surprising number.
"ΜΙΑ ΧΕΛΩΝΑ!!!" crows the throng of delighted small children, who are, suddenly, everywhere.
"μια χελώνα!" I agree, accepting that at least for current purposes, that is what it is.
"Μπορούμε να δούμε τη χελώνα σας; [can we see your turtle?]" asks an adorable little girl, shyly, and I understand??
The children fucking love looking at the χελώνα and showing it to them is kind of magical?
I finally put the tortoise down on the grass of this wild area off to the side of the courtyard, and marvel aloud that it is weird that I barely know any Greek except how to say μια χελώνα.
"I think she will soon run off," a kind lady called Aspasia assures me, seeing I remain slightly anxious about its fate. "I don't know why I'm saying 'she'. I suppose because χελώνα is feminine in Greek."
"Yes! I know that!" I exclaim, thrilled.
"Well done!" she says. And also she asks if we are OK for drinking water after the storm and if we need any help with anything and is just generally incredibly lovely and now we know more of the neighbours!
So "μια χελώνα" has just become, by a long way, my most-used and most understood and all-around most conversationally successful phrase in Greek. So I guess I have to admit I was wrong to doubt Duolingo's wisdom: it is correct to be obsessed with turtles. And I concede that prior to learning how to count to ten or to distinguish right from left, the simple ability to yell the word TURTLE over and over again is, it turns out, a crucial element of the responsible traveller's social skills.
(I am pretty fluent in Italian and turtles haven't come up in conversation even once?)
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verstarppen · 10 months ago
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haiii plz ignore this if your requests are closed 🙇🏻‍♀️ but I'm begging you to give us george who's totally in love with someone from the camera crew and the drivers start making fun of him for it but it's all fluff ♥️
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summary; mercedes have a strict policy regarding office romance, but that can't stop Totally Spies because they can't read
pairing; george russell x fem! camera operator! reader [ no faceclaim ]
a/n; im so sorry if this isn't as funny as usual im rusted and dusted from exam season anyway HERE WE GOOO HERE WE GOOO ON A MISSION UNDERCOVER AND WE'RE IN CONTROL HERE WE GOO HERE WE GOOO WE'RE TOTALLY SPIES SO WE'LL GET ON WITH THE SHOW
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liked by charles_leclerc, landonorris, lilymhe and 625,801 others
alex_albon He's going to look back at this post and curse my entire bloodline isn't he
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georgerussell63 Alright then, what's all this about
alex_albon It'll all be revealed in time... georgerussell63 Your old wizard impression is serving
scuderiayummy the f1 gc must be booming rn bc what does this even mean, alexander.
charlielecunt If I see "breaking news: george russell found dead in a ditch" in 30 mins I'm gonna lose it
pierreleftsock "time to take george to football, live up the bugatti weeee"
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liked by alex_albon, landonorris, charles_leclerc and 755,105 others
georgerussell63 I won in the name of the people
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miss.sainz55 this is better than 95% of the enemies to lovers books i've read
typicallyleclerc what happened to the original plot of the movie
applenorizz bitches be like "can't stand her fake ass" 10 minutes later "me and the bestie"
landonorris i feel the urge to bash your head in a wall
georgerussell63 Digital footprint
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liked by 36rg, britney_alex_clover and 15 others
ynusername on a mission undercover and we're in control
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36rg Alexa, play "They Don't Know About Us" by One Direction
ynusername THEY DON'T KNOW HOW SPECIAL YOU AREEEE
britney_alex_clover Now all you have to do is avoid being spotted together by the public eye, your boss, all of your friends, your family and also the entire human population
britney_alex_clover also please stop flirting on promo vid sets that shit is cringe as fuck britney_alex_clover I find it adorable britney_alex_clover no one cares what u think charles britney_alex_clover Wow. britney_alex_clover Guys britney_alex_clover Sorry britney_alex_clover Hello 👋 britney_alex_clover alright who let maximilian in 36rg Who let any of you menaces in britney_alex_clover careful loverboy, i've got HR on the phone 36rg And I know what you did with the trophy after Vegas britney_alex_clover OKAYYYY LET'S ALL JUST CALM DOWN britney_alex_clover what the fuck 36rg Eyes and ears everywhere, Norris britney_alex_clover Wait, is that why I still can't get it to light up? Did you break another one??? britney_alex_clover can someone ban max off this account thank you
britney_alex_clover and while you're at it can you tell the trophy company to start making trophies that look less edible
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pic credits: instagram and pinterest
blog taglist: @coffeehurricanes @iifloweringnightsii @jsjcue @lanando4 @fastcarsandshit @christianpulisic10 @allygatcr @marshmummy @ravisinghs-wife  (happy race week everyoneee im so glad to be back)
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juniperdugong · 6 months ago
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Relationship Quirks 95s ver.
Aka habits I can see the boys doing in a relationship || 95s || 96s || 97s || Maknae line ||
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Scoups Calls you his "wife" while you guys are still dating
NOT AROUND YOU... at first but I doubt that the guys wouldn't secretly take video of him whining during practice talking about, "I miss my wife..." all pouty and everything (he saw you this morning), and NOT send it to you.
He's awkward when you bring it up because he doesn't know if you feel that way about the future of your relationship but once he knows you do feel the same way WHEW you do not hear the end of it.
Suddenly, all the reservations he makes are preceded by "Well, me and my wife...", anytime you're brought up in a conversation dude glitches out and HAS to mention you as his wife at least once (especially if it's to someone he thinks might be interested in you), and the yearning only gets worse! He'll leave for tour and after he texts his customary airplane goodbye message to you your phone will be blowing up with texts from the boys complaining about having to hear their leader practically sobbing about how much he misses his wife.
Jeonghan Steals your stuff
Has big "What's yours is mine" mentality, but don't worry! What's his is yours too! He swears it! Despite the drastic difference in how much he's using, borrowing, or straight up taking your stuff...
Let's be clear though, he never takes things he thinks you'll miss and if he finishes something of yours he always makes sure to replace it pronto. If you do get upset he makes a mental note to not mess with that particular item ever again.
Have you noticed a suspicious amount of your clothing (mainly hoodies, hats, and bags) go missing and suddenly see your boyfriend wearing them during a live? Yes. Has there been multiple arguments about this behavior? For sure! Does it absolutely warm your heart when you're at a concert and see a staff member run on stage to hand Hannie his current comfort item (a childhood toy of yours that you didn't even know was missing from your room)? Absolutely, it does. (Apologizes profusely once you find out...doesn't mean a single word of it and you know it because he's giggling the whole time)
Joshua Buys 2 of everything
Since the dawn of your relationship, Shua has gotten 2 of every item he buys. His initial reason was to get to know one another better by trying out things the other liked. This then spiraled to him doubling every single grocery item, clothes he buys, and pretty much anything he orders. Could be an insanely valuable item worth thousands that he's getting paid to promote but if there isn't a matching one for you then it's off the table. And no, he doesn't necessarily want to be "matching" all the time but he likes knowing that you guys could match whenever you wanted to.
He also gets extremely offended if you question why there's so much of everything, seriously he doesn't even want to hear it, like "Because it's ours! And we share! So we need double! Do you hate me or something!?"
"Babe, why do we have so much shampoo..." "I'm promoting it." "There's 2 of every type in here." "Yep." "We don't ne-" "We do need it." "It's too much." "I don't understand what you're saying to me right now."
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A/N: The brainrot I have for these men is so real rnnnnn. I just had to separate these by years bc it was getting too long :( I'll have 96s up by today too, so stay tuned for that 96 line OUT NOW!! (Have to do it for my babe Nonu) Reblogs and Comments are much-appreciated lovelies!!
TAGLIST (open): @bemybabiibish
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vismoney · 2 months ago
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- LIKE HIM.
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Pairing :: Charles Xavier x Female!Reader, mentions of Father!Erik Lehnsherr x Daughter!Reader.
Summary :: After 8 years of asking Charles the same questions about your father, Erik Lehnsherr, you finally asked him the one question that had been plaguing your mind the most.
Warnings :: Brief mention of smut at the end. Some angst, some fluff. Charles is weird for sleeping with a former student that he used to teach one-on-one, no use of y/n (there will never be on my blog), reader is over 18+ (but then again she was his student for the past 8 years), and reader's mutation is not specified.
Note :: I literally didn't know how to end the story as a whole, so I tried my best 😭 Currently obsessing over Like Him by Tyler, The Creator right now, so this story is inspired by that. Set before the events of X-Men Apocalypse, so Erik is very much still in Poland with his wife and daughter. I'm very nervous since I don't know how to write broken familial relationships, but I hope you guys enjoy it!
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“I don’t know where he is.”
Charles had repeated that exact sentence to you for the past 8 years of your life at his school everytime you asked if he knew where your father was, but you were 95% certain that everytime he answered your question, he did know where he was located.
At exactly 8 years after being enrolled at the school by your human mother as soon as the Institute reopened after the Vietnam war, you sat right across Charles at his office, as you two celebrated the anniversary of your enrollment over a competitive game of chess and some reminiscing of some nostalgic memories. The warm lights of the lamps and the soft glow of the fireplace gave the environment a warm setting, in contrast to the cloudy darkness of the night sky outside, it had been raining a lot in Westchester after all.
Being the affair daughter of one of the greatest mutants living on this planet automatically granted you the terrified respect of the people around you, one that you abuse endlessly without consequences, especially with the Professor. You did wonder if he only answered your many questions about your father because he knew if he didn’t, you would either figure it out yourself by leaving the school and endangering yourself, or you’d give him the silent treatment, the latter being the most likely.
You could feel his eyes on you as you debated what move would grant you an easy win with the least amount of chess pieces sacrificed. To most people, Professor Charles Xavier was a serious man who would stop at nothing if it meant it protected mutantkind, or the students at his school. Before you graduated, you had certainly held that opinion of him, even though you were one titled as one of his special students, the kids who had the privilege of chatting with him on the daily and received one-on-one lessons with him, like Jean.
As you moved your rook to take his knight, you leaned back onto your seat and met his gaze. You wondered again if you were only one of his special students because you were Magneto’s daughter or if your powers were truly special and powerful enough that he felt the need of having private lessons with him. 
“I thought you’d have more newer questions about him tonight.” He remarked as he took a sip of his whiskey out of his glass, while retaining his intense eye contact with you. “I thought you wouldn’t ask me again where his location was.”
“It doesn’t hurt to try.”
“You know that I would immediately tell you first if I had information on Erik’s whereabouts.”
“Really? I thought Hank would have the privilege of that first.” 
Charles quirked up a small smile at your sarcastic remark. He downed all his whiskey at once and placed his glass back at the table. “The last time I checked, he isn’t related to Erik at all; unless Erik has some more unknown children that I don’t know about.”
You smirked as you considered the thought of your absent father having more unknown kids somewhere. “Well, you know him better than I do, Professor, what do you think?”
Charles chuckled and shook his head as he moved one of his bishops to take your rook. “I bet on it, my dear.” He said smoothly.
The discussion about Magneto was quickly forgotten as the night went on, the quiet and peaceful atmosphere of his office was disrupted by quiet grunts and groans filling up the room as you and Charles entangled yourselves in a passionate exchange. 
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The early rays of the sun shone in the room as you drew lazy patterns behind Charles’ back as he  laid asleep. The quickly turned innocent celebration to the intense encounter had quickly worn him up, something that you had teased him about multiple times before. As you watched him sleep, the thought of your father crossed your mind again, sending you down into a spiral of endless unanswered questions. Did he know that you exist? How would he treat you if he found out that you are his daughter? Would you look like him?
For an enemy of the US Government, they sure don’t hold any pictures of him at all. From searching the web, or going to the library, there were many accounts of who Magneto is, not what Magento looks like. Even when you managed to sneak out of your dorm in the past after curfew to look around the mansion for any pictures that the Professor might have of his former best friend, he had nothing. Out of all the questions that you had repeatedly asked Charles about, asking “Do I look like my father?” was the one you dreaded the answer for.
As if on cue, the man laying in front of you slowly stirred awake and met your gaze. “Good morning, darling.” He whispered softly and leaned in to kiss your lips. “How long have you been awake?
“Just a few minutes ago.” 
He hummed and brought your head to rest on his bare chest. “Thinking, again?
“When have I ever stopped thinking?” You chuckled against his chest and sighed in contentment. Comfortable silence filled the room as he caressed your hair with such gentleness, that a newborn baby would be jealous.
“Do I look like him?” You asked suddenly, as if your mouth had a life on its own.
He stopped caressing your hair and tilted your chin up to meet his gaze. “Look like who?”
“My father.”
He paused, his eyes looking over your face; from your eyes, to your nose, to your lips. “..No. You don’t look like him.” He answered honestly but bluntly, not sugarcoating his answer in any way, shape, or form. “You look much more like your mother.”
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galaxythreads · 5 months ago
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hey psa for newer fanfic lovers!! :) got this comment on a fic today:
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i updated this fic in november, around 8-9 months ago. which probably feels like an enormous amount of time, but isn't unreasonable for a fic. sometimes they don't get updated for years, but they do still get updated. i know of a fic that wasn't updated for over fifteen years, and then the author came and took the like 50k they'd written, edited it, and wrote a 300k+ fic in the span of like six months.
This fic is not abandoned and it feels a little bit frustrating to me that rather than wait, this person - who I love that they love the idea so much they want to continue it themselves, to be clear. that's really nice to know, but - this person wanted to just take over the fic for me. I do have a life outside of fics. and outside of that, I'm very mentally ill. I completely understand the instinct to want more of the story, but part of the culture of fics is that sometimes you've just gotta wait. it sucks. It's not enjoyable. But that's just the nature of how fics work. And to make this clear:
95% of authors will let you know if the fic is discontinued.
until that point, encouragement, support, and reassurance that you're still there waiting for the next update is always welcomed. A detailed analysis of why you love the fic will probably get you an update within 3 months, or at least the reassurance of knowing that the author knows how much the fic means to you.
Please don't offer to take over the fic unless the story has been explicitly stated to be discontinued, no matter how much you love it. I understand the instinct, i promise, but all this did was make me extraordinarily anxious. I've responded to the comment and made it clear that they don't have my permission to continue the fic, but part of me is like. do i have to give an update this week to prove that it's not abandoned and they don't disregard what I said and take over the story for me? Do i have the energy and mental space TO write an update that quickly? Am I going to be able to finish this fic or will be stolen out of my hands because I didn't write fast enough? Do I have the right to say that I want to work on it if I'm not updating quickly? What if they still ignore me saying no and then they start working on their own version before getting pissed with me for continuing?
It's made it a lot more convoluted for me than it needed to be. So just. Just wait. Please. Thanks.
-very tired fic author
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secretariatess · 2 months ago
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I've said it before and I'll say it again.
I think it's a dang shame that we'll put celebration of the day the church split over the day the church was formed.
It's not that I think what the Catholic Church was doing at the time that instigated the Reformation was good or in no need of correction, but rather that God's church was split and created factions upon factions where we now squabble with each other. We went from a united church to one with many denominations that fight with each other about which ones are the "true" ones, or which denominations are "wrong."
Don't get me wrong, I like being Nazarene. I like what the Nazarene church offers, and I agree with Nazarene theology. And it wouldn't be possible without the Reformation. I don't agree with Catholic theology. I think there are many things where they are off base. But there are still those in the Catholic church who are Christian, and I'm not going to write them off because of the Protestant/Catholic chasm.
The Reformation was necessary. I'm not sure it was necessary to celebrate. The Church split. It split. The Church, where Jesus said that the world would know us by the love we have for each other, split.
To put it another way: God's family split. How is that not heartbreaking? I am under no delusion that everyone was working in harmony previously, but still . . . .
When Martin Luther nailed the 95 theses up, his goal was not to split the church. It was to correct the church. But he had lobbed a hand grenade at a festering rot, gone too far deep to accept correction and instead desired to keep its corruption.
There's a lesson in the Reformation. There was good in the Reformation. I do believe God worked in the Reformation. But I feel like the lesson and warning of the Reformation is lost when we celebrate "no longer being Catholic!"
The Reformation should be sobering.
And if we are going to celebrate a formation of the church, why are we putting so much stock on the Reformation, and ignoring the Pentecost, where God came down again?
What is the purpose in celebrating the Reformation, and what is the excuse in forgetting Pentecost?
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murderandcoffee · 10 months ago
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okay so. here are my thoughts on the characters we've been re-introduced to.
celia, gerry, gertrude, and georgie exist in this universe. those are facts. however, we do not know which versions of them they are. the possibilities, however, give us some insight into how the whole situation works.
celia: high chance that she's the original celia from the tmaverse (member of melanie and georgie's cult, trapped in the not!them's domain, previously told the institute about her experience with a flaming ghost) and was carried over when the fears left her world. if that's the case, then she's probably had some time to adapt and establish herself, as she has found a job at the OIAR and befriended georgie. nonetheless, still possible that this is a different version of celia, who has been in this universe from the start. if so, that calls into question how she met georgie and got interested in the institute.
gerry and gertrude: definitely not the original ones. we have proof that this gerry has been here for decades (his time at the institute). also, both he and gertrude were confirmed dead in the tmaverse. these versions of them must then be originally from this world. this confirms (with like... 95% confidence, on my part) that there ARE versions of at least SOME people in both worlds.
georgie: I am inclined to believe that she, like gerry and gertrude, is the protocolverse's version of herself, NOT the original tmaverse version. I say this because we heard her after the fears left her world. we don't know if the gap at hilltop road remained open, but as of mag200 she was still in her original world after the fears disappeared. if the georgie we heard about today IS the original georgie, then she would have had to find a way across worlds. if she did that, then I see no reason why celia would be researching time travel, multiple dimensions, and the like--surely georgie would have at least some answers for her. thus, I think that this is a different georgie--this world's version of her. likely a version who can feel fear (but I wouldn't be surprised if something else had happened to her along those lines).
so with this, we know that there are multiple versions of people (at least some people--we don't know if that's the case for everyone, and if I'm being honest, I really doubt it) across universes. however, we don't know how many similarities their lives in the protocolverse bear to their lives in the tmaverse. gerry had a much different experience with the institute and gertrude is not the archivist, but georgie still has her podcast.
the one really interesting part is celia--if this IS the tmaverse celia, then how did she get here? was she caught in the tide that swept the fears through the gap in reality at hilltop road? if so, were there others--people who helped bring down the tower? if not, how DID she get here?
I'm intrigued to see what we learn about each of these versions of people, and what comes to light as we learn more.
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xerith-42 · 10 months ago
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I was wrong
It takes a lot to admit that, even more for me to admit that about MCD, but I was wrong about something in regards to this series. In a previous post I said that the worst episode of MCD was Season 2 Episode 95, because it was the culmination of the absolute failure that was Laurance's character arc. And I wasn't wrong about that, S2E95 is an objectively bad episode and I stand by it being one of the worst. But it's only one of the worst episodes of this series. Probably second or third worst.
The actual worst episode of Minecraft Diaries happens far earlier in it's run time than I anticipated. The actual episode that begins the degrading of every single main character happens within it's first season. The worst episode of Minecraft Diaries is Season 1 Episode 65, Our Fears.
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For those of you who haven't watched MCD in a minute, or aren't insane like I am and recognize what happens in an episode from just a number and a thumbnail, this is the episode where Aphmau and Dante get chased into Malachi's abandoned castle and fall victim to his uncontrollable magic. A magic that shows people their greatest fears.
Now the concept of a ghost that forces the audience and the characters to come face to face with the leading characters greatest fears is a fantastic idea. I'm serious this is one of the best concepts for character work in the entire Aphverse. This is great, this can go so many good ways.
Aphmau's fear is pretty weak mostly because it shows her house on fire, nobody hurt, and Malachi comments that she's "Scared of losing the ones you love." My honest reaction to this was "She lost her house in episode 36 and didn't seem to care because her loved ones are safe. You wanna communicate that she's scared of people dying just show Zoey lying on the ground or something smh." It gets the job done, but not very well.
Dante's fear is the only one that's well done because it's an image of Gene about to rip apart the realm barrier in the Nether. This works surprisingly well despite only being one shot because it gets across Dante's connection to Gene and the Nether pretty well, setting up for the reveal later on. Dante's existence is this episode's single redeeming quality. And as much as I like the guy, he's not enough to hold up the episode after what happens next.
Now, dear viewer who presumably knows the plot of MCD because you've read this far into a post about this single episode, you know that at this point in the series Garroth has been found out by his brother and has the looming threat of the entire O'Khasis military on his mind all the damn time. Zane has already hurt members of his village in direct ways, and only didn't do more damage because he was called away for an emergency. Garroth has already failed to protect one lord, and he's nearly failed to protect another.
Laurance is a shadow knight. And even though the lore of shadow knights is still flimsy at this point, we know that they are very prone to killing lords, it's why Laurance renounced his position as head guard of Meteli and refuses to return. But that doesn't mean his desire for blood is gone. It just means it has a new target. Like say, the lord he comes to the castle in search of? That he has explicit romantic feelings for?
Again, this idea of forcing the audience and the characters to face their greatest fears is such a good idea, especially with these three, because they can all be interlinked. Aphmau fears losing her loved ones, Garroth fears failing to protect his people, and Laurance fears that he'll give into bloodlust. Are you picking up what I'm putting down? I don't know if I can make it anymore obvious where the show should have gone from here.
But, no, unfortunately Jesson wrote this series. So what could have been one of the best moments of character work in the entire series, instead became the beginning of the end for our would be love interests. I'm of course referring to how it's revealed that their actual "worst fear" is Aphmau getting with... Another guy. Not even her picking one over the other, just her holding hands with and kissing some guy that Garroth and Laurance DON'T EVEN KNOW!
And despite Laurance saying he's happy as long as he has Aphmau in his life, he starts getting enraged that another guy would have the audacity to kiss her. Even though the scene he's shown seems to be entirely consensual. And in response to this, BOTH OF THEM DECIDE TO TRY AND KILL THIS ILLUSION OF DANTE JUST FOR KISSING THE GIRL THEY LIKE!
AND THIS IS SEEN AS A GOOD THING BY THE SHOW!! Attacking this illusion breaks the barrier around the real Aphmau and Dante, and Garroth and Laurance are never punished for their actions here. Aphmau is barely concerned that her guards, the men she's willing to trust with her life, were willing to kill someone for the crime of kissing her. Hot fucking take, Aphmau maybe shouldn't trust these people after seeing that they're willing to kill a man over the crime of loving her when they want to.
And even hotter take, GARROTH AND LAURANCE WOULDN'T DO THIS! Both men have been shown to be highly protective over Aphmau, which makes sense it's literally their job to keep her safe, but that protective nature shouldn't cross over into actively interfering with her romantic life. They're fucking lucky it was just an illusion, what would have happened if Malachi used mind control? What if he was using Aphmau and Dante's bodies as puppets? What if Garroth and Laurance just killed an amateur guard whose only crime was being forced to kiss the girl they liked?
This is one of those writing decisions that truly baffles me. It was RIGHT THERE, HOW DID YOU MISS, IT (the perfect piece of character work) WAS THREE FEET IN FRONT OF YOU! The answer is that Jesson don't really care about the interesting character work, they care about tropes. They care about the main character being in a love triangle with two guys who equally suck but in different ways. They care about fans getting excited and debating over which ship is better. They care about pushing this love triangle onto viewers regardless of what makes sense for the characters involved because the writers fail to see the nuance of the characters that they fucking wrote the nuance of.
I fucking hate Episode 65. Easily the worst episode of MCD. Any episode after this when Garroth and Laurance act horrendously out of character in service of this love triangle (I'm looking at you episode 77, and episode 90, and season 2 episode 95, and season 2 episode 98), know that it started here. It started with episode 65.
Fuck this episode.
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jeonscatalyst · 3 months ago
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What difference do you think we would have gotten to see if it wasn't jk with jm but let's say tae? I'm only using tae as an example cause he's the same age as jimin so the 95-97 remains there and the "dynamics change because of age" reason wouldn't be there. Or else i would have used other members as an example
TK bicker too, jungkook was teasing tae (Basically when vmk are together it's fixed that one of them is going to get ganged up by the other two, happens with TK-Jm, Jkk-TH, Vmin-JK so that's a given. He was considerate of tae as well given he was asking him to join when tae was on the phone or when he said to let's eat near tae even before he knew tae was unwell. It's of course basic manners to make ur supposed guest feel involved and they both did. he also said jeju was better because tae was there so i was just wondering what difference would it have made in the show if it was a TK show. like we obviously would have gotten them enjoying their time doing all the activities and I'm sure they know how to hangout without a third party involved so i kinda don't see much difference so it would be nice to see a different pov.
Hi anon,
I think we can only try to imagine how different things would have been if it was just Jk and Tae because we unfortunately have rarely seen just the two of them interacting for that long without other people as buffers and the few times we did get to see them together without any other members like the Taekook Carnation Vlive of 2020 and their joint instagram Live last year, it wasn’t really anything to write home about in my opinion.
Pre 2016 taekook together would have been pure comedy gold in my opinion because those two were hilarious and so much fun together when they were younger. They had amazing chemistry and knew how to go with the flow with each other so well but I don’t think things remained the same after they grew up and matured over the years. I think that biggest thing which made them to be able to relate to each other so much was not there as much anymore so things became a little strained.
Taekook can definitely hang out with each other without other people but I don’t think they can do it for as long as Jimin and Jungkook do it. Take AYS episodes 3-5 for example. Things were so much fun when the three guys had all those fun activities to do on the first day. They had climbing, racing, motorbike riding, it was so entertaining to watch all 3 of them having so much fun and just running around like 5 year olds but look at what happened the moment those fun physical activities were done. Tae was literally almost always on his phone and barely interacted with Jikook. While at the restaurants jikook were the ones always talking with each other while tae was either on his phone or was quiet. Even back at home after their day’s activities, he usually went to bed much earlier than Jimin and Jungkook while these two stayed up and just found fun in whatever silly thing they were doing. This, is the difference between taekook and Jikook.
When there is physical activity which they consider fun, taekook gel so well and could be so interesting to watch but one of them tends to lose some interest after a while or gets tired and retires while one is still in the mood to play around. This doesn’t happen with Jikook. Jikook don’t necessarily need a lot of physical fun activities to have fun together because they know how to create their own fun in any situation they are in. They know how to talk and laugh about the most random things, they have an insane amount of inside jokes, and more often than not, you would see them making decisions on what to do together. They also don’t always feel the need to fill the silence with noise. They are very capable of just being by each other without saying or doing much and would not feel bored but when you look at how tae was in episode 4 and 5 after the physical activities (plus his neck pain) it isn’t hard to see that he probably had, had enough. So imagine the show with just taekook in a situation like this. Tae probably spending alot of time on his phone, taekook barely saying anything to each other while eating at restaurants, Tae wanting to go to bed way earlier than Jk who is still hyper and just wants to play around and when you add to the fact that both of them are not big talkers, then you can imagine what it would be like.
Jimin is very good at starting and holding conversations and keeping things interesting with words. I don’t think Tae is good at this and Jk isn’t either but the thing is, when Jk is with Jimin, he talks more, he is such a yapper around Jimin but he is quieter with Tae probably because Tae doesn’t talk much either.
I can see how him being with Jikook in Jeju might have made things better because at the end of the day, things are always more fun with more people. There’s more laughter, more fun ideas etc so I think that is what Jk meant and Jimin too said he was able to run around like a kid again thanks to Tae. Jimin and Jungkook are the two who like doing more mundane and probably “boring” things together. They have always liked staying up late at nights doing the most unserious things together and it is so much fun for them while taekook are the ones who actually like doing fun recreational activities together. Jimin and Jungkook could be locked up together in an empty room and they would still find something fun to do. That is the difference anon.
Bottom line here is that Jk, Jimin and Taehyung are all friends. They all love and care about each other. Jk loves Tae and he loves Jimin too, he is also very close to both of them but Jk just relates or gels with both of them in very different ways. Just because they are all close doesn’t mean they have the exact same kind of closeness with each other. There are certain things that Jungkook might feel are better with Tae and others that he feels are better with Jimin. I think Jungkook prefers doing the extra fun outdoor activities with Taehyung, while he enjoys the more mundane or subtle things with Jimin. He just likes talking with Jimin, being silly with him, or just doing nothing with him. So with Jimin and Jungkook we would probably still see them doing just fine with little to no activity but with Taehyung and Jungkook, we probably need activities to actually see them gel well with each other. That is what I think the difference would be anon, based on everything I know about them and also what we saw on AYS.
Taekook actually don’t bicker much and based on what I have seen, one person usually gets upset when some jokes/ teasing gets too far. Think of Tae straight up getting upset and telling Jk not to take things too far when Jk joked about him being weak or how tae got mad and Jimin made Jk apologize back in 2019 when Tae was trying to say something during a Live but Jk told him that what he was about to say wasn’t important at that moment. Taekook are not used to bickering with each other like Jikook are so while Jikook would laugh about certain things when they joke with each other, Taekook wouldn’t. So you cannot even compare taekook bickering to Jikook’s. Jikook have been used to roasting each other since their rookie days, it is fun for them.
These are just my opinions though anon. Other people might see things differently.
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kyemna · 10 months ago
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Hazbin Hotel Characters Positive and Negative traits
Headcanons
I apologize for any grammer mistakes!
Tw: none
Charlie
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Positive:
-Loves to do things for you.
-Also loves it when you bake together.
-Keeps every single gift you give her in a box with rainbows and glitter on it.
-Unironically says 'yo mama' at the wrong times LMFAO
-Plays with your hair or fingers when she's in deep thought
-Brags to her dad about how you're the most amazing partner ever
-Has the most amazing made up stories and fantasies. Talks your ears off with them
-When you're laying in bed, and she wakes up before you, she'll lay on top of you to wake you up.
I'm not kidding. It can be 6 am, and she'll crawl over to your side of the bed and lay her whole body on yours.
-In general, she's super fun to be around.
Negative:
-Overworks herself.
With that, she forgets to eat.
On a few occasions she actually fainted.
-Becomes distant when something's bothering her.
-She can get too swept up in her ideologies/fantasies, that she doesn't see what's right infront her.
-Lowkey controlling, but doesn't realize it.
(I don't think there are many negative things about Charlie to be honest LOL)
Vaggie:
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Positive:
-Considerate.
-If she sees something that reminds her of you, she buys it.
-Knows how to calm you down/put you in your place.
-Admits when she's wrong, and knows when to apologize.
-Smells good. I have a feeling she just smells sweet. Like coconut or something.
-A surprisingly good artist?
-Has a great wardrobe. Let's you raid it every once in a while.
-Strong asf. Often lifts you up, and throws you over her shoulder.
Negative:
-Aggressive.
Normally, she has no way of outing it, so she bottles it up. Because of this, she can come over as aggressive, simply because her cup overflows.
-Drowns in her feelings.
-Takes things too seriously.
-She hit you in a fight once, and she still regrets it.
-Also hold grudges.
-Gives you the silent treatment if you did something to her dislike.
Alastor:
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Positive:
-Surprisingly understanding.
-I said this once, and will continue to say it, he has AMAZING taste in music. Many of the characters do.
-A great cook.
His mom taught him many recipes, so he loves to make them for you.
-Protective.
-Open minded/open to new experiences
-Intelligent, always knows when you lie.
-Good at boardgames.
Beat you at Uno SO many times, it's getting a little humiliating..
-Aware of your likes and dislikes, whether that be: Music, clothes, topic of conversation, certain foods, and tries to help you avoid those things in your daily life.
-Gets along with your mother very well.
He's always willing to lend her a hand.
Negative:
-Obsessive.
-Has his eye on you 95% of the time. Not in a good way.
-Decides things for you without you asking him/giving him permission.
-does NOT mind his business.
-Not good with kids.
Because he's born in the 1890's he's super old fashioned. Therefore I think he would strike his kids if they misbehaved.
-Doesn't get along with your male friends, and is 'overly' friendly with your female friends, which makes it seem like he's flirting with them.
-He's a murderer. That speaks for itself.
-Blood thirsty as hell.
-A good liar, which makes him seem untrustworthy.
Angel Dust:
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Positive:
-Loves grocery shopping or shopping in general with you.
-Notices small changes in your behavior, whether it's due to stress or simply a bad day, and helps you relax/cheer you up.
-Is great at planning dates!
-Also has amazing music taste.
I personally think a few of his main artists are:
Lady Gaga, Kesha, T-ara, Britney Spears and The Weeknd
-Funny as hell. No pun or joke gets past him.
-Great with animals! If you have a pet, he has a nickname for them.
-Unironically calls you 'Pookie' or 'Snukems'
-Has a good memory. Remembers your favorite color, your favorite flower, etc.
-Chases you around the house/appartment with a bug he caught. (Whether that's negative or positive is totally up to you)
Negative:
-Doesn't really understand/do boundaries, so he'll often take things too far.
-Argumentive. He enjoys a good argument or fight, which makes it difficult to find a solution to the problem your fighting about.
-Holds grudges.
-Overthinks the smallest things.
-Secretive. It takes a lot to get him to talk about his feelings and problems.
-Takes his anger out on you sometimes.
-Passive aggressive.
-Borrows your things without your permission, and doesn't put them back when he's done.
Husk:
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Positive:
-Funny. Like, his jokes are actually hilarious. Unlike Alastor who makes the most awful dad jokes ever.
-Is so fully aware when your bullshiting him, he just pretends not to know.
-As i said in previous headcanons, he LOVES to dance with you.
He's super good at it too!
Has his hands all over you.
Hips, waist, neck, back, you name it.
-Will never admit it, but he likes it when you sneak up on him/jump him.
-In general he's pretty accepting of physical touch.
-He purrs, when you scratch his ears or something.
-Leaves you small gifts and letters around the house/appartment.
Negative:
-Messy. Has trouble cleaning/keeping things clean.
-Forgetful. Often forgets your dates.
-Anger Issues.
-Snaps at you when he's overwhelmed or stressed. Doesn't apologize for it because he's not aware of it. You'd have to point it out to get an apology out of him.
-Easily irritated.
When you're too close to him, when he's in a bad mood or when you take jokes a little too far, he ignores you for a few hours.
Thank you for reading!
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lurkingshan · 3 months ago
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(Different anon) I agree with and understand your points re: ~why you watch GMMTV if don't like??~ and why the question is/feels hostile.
But taking the question itself in good faith as "why do you (should I) keep watching shows I think/know I will not like based on how others have been handled?" in the genuine spirit of "explain like I'm 5 because I don't understand the lingo and background but want to understand the concept, how would you explain it to people not as into/knowledgeable/etc BL and the history of GMMTV?
Hi anon! This is an interesting question, because it depends so much on you as an individual and what makes you happy.
I think there is often a misconception that people who post critical meta are having a miserable time and torturing themselves with media they hate, but it's just not true. For folks like me who enjoy thinking critically, this is how we have fun. When I love something, I want to rip open its guts and see how it's all assembled. It's what stimulates my brain and gets me excited. And when I don't love something wholeheartedly, I am interested in figuring out why. I've often had the experience of watching something that I know should be working on me, and if it isn't, that creates an intellectual puzzle that I find very satisfying to solve. Why isn't it working, and what can that help me learn about storytelling? This is also fun for me.
Another misconception I often see in fandom is that if you like something, you can't have negative thoughts about it and you have to pretend it's perfect to be a good fan. Nonsense! Being a hater is fun, especially about things you truly love. I'll give you a really concrete example: Bad Buddy is one of my all time favorite shows. It first aired three years ago and I still think about it nearly every day. It's a show that stimulates my brain but also hits me straight in the heart. But I do not think it's perfect and I get a lot of joy from thinking about the parts that did not work (Wai's redemption, that stupid fake out in the finale, all of episode 9) and making fun of it (have you heard that PAT GOT SHOT??). This, too, is a form of love and source of joy.
So with those misconceptions addressed, why do I keep watching shows I suspect I won't like? First, because you truly never know until you try, and I like to be pleasantly surprised. Two of my favorite shows of this year, Cherry Magic Thailand and Knock Knock Boys, shocked the hell out of me. I went into CMT deeply skeptical only to be charmed against my will and so impressed by how they adapted it, and I went into KKB expecting it to be like 95% of weak Thai pulps only to realize its writing and themes were stronger than they had any right to be. If I stayed away from all media I thought I might not like, I would have never had the amazing experience of watching and discussing those two shows live with friends who also loved them.
Second, like I said above, I still have fun examining shows that are not quite working for me, and sometimes I am compelled by the ambition of shows even if I don't think the execution is serving. A great example of that is The Sign. I wanted to support that show because of who was making it, and it had so much early promise that when it fell apart halfway through, I stuck it out to try to make sense of what went wrong. In cases like that, I like to figure out what a show thinks it's doing, what it's actually doing, and where the disconnect is. It's a fun puzzle for me to sort through such an ambitious mess of a show. This is why, btw, I am never really moved by fanwanks to fill in gaps in story and characterization. I understand why others enjoy fixing shows in their brains and then pretending that's what they actually saw, but it's not what motivates me. My goal with shows like this is not to get myself to like it no matter what, it's to figure out why I don't like it and what could be changed to address that.
Third, I care about ql as a genre, and I like to be aware of how it's evolving and be part of the collective experience of watching it. QL fandom is tiny and I like to know what my friends are talking about! I can't watch everything because there is simply way too much content these days, but I like to watch or at least pay attention to most of the big buzzy shows to track trends and see what's getting the fandom frustrated or excited. I didn't watch We Are because I knew enough about what it was doing and who was involved to understand it was not for me, but I did pay attention to reactions to it. Watching Jack & Joker with Thai bl fandom right now is some of the most fun we've had since Only Friends killed our spirit. J&J is directed by my parasocial frenemy Tee Bundit, whose shows often frustrate the hell out of me and whom I have ripped to shreds on this platform many times over. But I'm not gonna let that stop me from having fun with this new show, because Joke is The Moment and we're all in this together.
So truly, anon: whether or not you should be like me and watch things you may not like or continue watching shows you don't think are very good depends on what motivates you. You should figure out what is most fun for you re: media consumption, and do that. You can seek out people who enjoy media the same way you do, and also befriend people who think differently if you want to learn from each other and don't mind a bit of productive discomfort from time to time. I have gotten better recently at recognizing when I'm just getting nothing out of a show and dropping it like a hot potato (because some shows are not bad in an interesting way, they are just bad), or realizing which shows I will like better on a binge (usually the ones with terrible pacing, that is not as tortuous for me when I can just watch it all in one go). You gotta do some testing to figure it out.
All of this has all been a really long-winded way to say you should do what makes you happy, and don't assume that just because someone else's happiness looks different from yours, that it's wrong.
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aingeal98 · 8 months ago
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More aos rambles but I find it so interesting that Coulson, despite being the one May and Daisy look to as a man with a good heart when they themselves feel like monsters, is the one who would risk everything including other people to save them. Like if Daisy is in danger and the only option to save her is a plan where every other agent has a 95% chance of dying, he's doing it. And he's very openly hypocritical about it to the point that everyone else calls out his double standards. Mace saying "When it comes to May and Daisy you can't be objective." and Lincoln and May pointing out how he'd sacrifice every inhuman but never Daisy. Like he cares very deeply about Fitz and Simmons but he makes decisions that puts them at risks that I just can't see him doing if it was Daisy. And Coulson very rarely feels bad about it, he stands by his hypocrisy and desire to protect his daughter. Even when it comes to Daisy's own wishes, he cares too much to let her sacrifice herself.
Meanwhile May doesn't love Daisy any less, quite possibly even loves her more by the end of the series, but she also is just more... understanding and respectful of Daisy's autonomy and wishes. Like if Daisy were to die or sacrifice herself May would never recover, would be the last to leave the grave side. But at the same time she wouldn't risk every agent to save her, choosing instead to believe in Daisy's ability to beat the impossible like she's done time and time again. And I don't think she would have knocked Daisy out to drag her home when she was scared of ending the world. She would have stayed with her, and that would likely have been what twisted Daisy's arm to get her home. 'If you're going to be stupidly sacrificial and stay then so am I, because we're too alike. I know how you think and I know that's how to checkmate your self destructive impulses.'
I'm not saying one is morally better than the other, they're both just parents who love their kid and want to protect her. But Coulson, who's viewed by most people as essentially just some suit with a good heart, would order every man he commands to fight a suicide battle if it was the only way to keep Daisy alive. Meanwhile May would be first in line to fight that battle, and she would win! But she would never drag anyone else down. She's as practical and ruthless as Coulson, even more so sometimes. But having been the one to train Daisy, her protection comes in the form of unshakeable belief in the good Daisy is capable of, and a gentle but solid place to rest whenever things don't go as planned. If she thinks Daisy's making a mistake she'll say it to her face, but she's more... open, than Coulson is, to letting Daisy fumble around and find her own way. She'll still be there to beat up anyone that threatens her kid and offer wisdom in the aftermath, but it's less impulsive than Coulson.
Coulson idolizes Captain America as a hero for the same heroic traits he sees in May and Daisy. He believes that they are Special people, and they must go on even if he doesn't. But those very same traits that makes them so special in his eyes are what makes them feel like they have to be the one to jump on the grenade and protect their team, all while Coulson is trying to keep them as far away from the grenade as possible. And they both see a goodness in him and in each other that they don't believe they posses themselves. They're all somewhat correct and also all a little blinded by how much they love each other, but that's just how families are.
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