#i need to find that thing again honestly
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i got into it bc awwwn and all the individual asmr were super cute and some were just a little spicy. but then i saw the shippy ones. and the first ones were also nice, little dates and sharing a bed and all that but when i got the ones with Deku in it EVERY SINGLE one needed to end with that guy's ass being destroyed or the promise of it. esp the bkdk ones.
and either that's a pattern or there's something seriously wrong with me that needs to be adressed
help???
#when i was into chara asmr i exclusively listened to the spicy ones bc i did not care for being comforted and such#i will 4ever remember the villain deku x listener asmr that for some reason has 5 minutes dedicated to izuku obsessing over kacchan.#bbgirl im? right here? i thought you were yandere in lvoe with me and thats why im tied up in your basement? wahts with moaning kacchan's#name suddenly?#i need to find that thing again honestly#ask//#spicy mumbles//
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Do you think this is the Finale of book 7? qwq
at this point I'm not going to believe it's actually over until we get the Diasomnia dorm reruns! those will be the portent I cling to in these times of uncertain anime character drama. 😰
honestly I'd been pretty convinced that 13 would be the end -- or that there might be, like, an epilogue chapter or something, but this would at least be the end of the main plot of 7. but now it looks like the Armor of Dawn Silver card is actually going to be for the second half next week, so...now I'm right back in "WHAT IS HAPPENING" camp! like, I can see a couple of possibilities of how that might still work out, but...well. I guess we'll find out tonight. :')
#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 13 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 13 spoilers#like. i could see something like. say. we get malleus' wrapup in this first half but then something happens with silver#and he has to help us save him#that's 100% just spitballin' though#honestly i think it's more likely the second half is just gonna need a lot of setup or something!#but again. we will find out. tonight.#i can't believe it's so soon auuuuugh#the timing of this just feels so specific to the anniversary that i'm even like#was this just a fun timing thing they wanted to do or was there some reason they needed to hit a certain point or something#like. idk. ortho's college gear#silver gets DOUBLE silver hair or something#my early-on theory that his name was legally silver silver turns out to be true#this is just more spitballin' don't take me too seriously#we will be able to look back on this tomorrow and laugh about how wrong i was#i'm just going into full hype mode here#'man i gotta stop playing the updates immediately when they come out at 2 am' WRONG past self you FOOL#who needs sleep when there are video game characters having emotional problems
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@scimagic Uhhh made this because I just think they’re dynamic is neat. Also completely agree with the Puzzle headcanon super fun silly and very on point. As we speak he is clinging for his dear life :))
I really enjoy seeing the illustrated storyline you have unfolding between the two and figured it would be nice to see this motorcycle sequence in motion. So tadaa here it is! In animated form! Now your obligated to make a full length written novel in-depth about their relationship /j
Sincerely though thanks for the creative inspiration and keep on being a swagger artist 👍✨
#Whoops seems my hand slipped—silly me these aren’t my characters! Here’s your lovelies back sorry for abducting them momentarily :))#tagging people is scary I’m just going to hide under a rock after this gets posted jksjsksp#my brain goes ‘teehee my genius hidden evil scheme no one saw coming—yess I shall gift lovely artists fanart when they least expect it’ >:3#and then once it’s actally time to post my brain goes crisis mode and implodes#like why am I drawing attention to myself huh? why can’t I scutter off as a masked anonymous figure into the night#oh well at least we made a dope ass motorcycle animation hell yea. Hopefully you like it <3#honestly in retrospect kinda surprises me that Puzzles doesn’t have a helmet…pretty sure his screen is durable but not THAT durable#one oopsie woopsie and that thing will get cracked again <<#but then again where are you ever going to find a rectangle screen shaped helmet to fit his head jksjsksp#there’s simply no winning#oh uh also incase anyone wishes to know the logistics of making this….didn’t take too long just three days! Pretty speedy :3#ok now this is the part where I twiddle my hands and await results lol#…..also just occurred to me the motorcycle model should’ve been a Harley or Suzuki I’m just dumb and forgor#even tho it was specified in the tags of the initial post I referenced heavily#like I was staring at the art for reference + online material but that useful tidbit of tag information flew over my head :P#sorry all you get is the generic motorcycle model….mission failed better luck next time *dies*#hplonesome art#not my characters#gift for someone else#do I even need to specify that in tags NO CLUE I’M PARANOID/j
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*sigh*
Sorry folks- no update this week. Things at the day-job have gotten.... busy. Like, 60+ hour work weeks busy. -_- I'm kind of dying.
The next page is *almost* done, but I have had so little energy between 11 hour shifts that it's just not happening this week. I need to do some hard thinking about the update schedule on this, especially if my job keeps doing.... this.
#we literally went from 20 hours a week to over 60#and i don't know when it'll finally balance back out#honestly i need to try and find a new job#...again#things are going to be bumpy here for a bit#I'm sorry#the comic will update when i can#but i don't think i can commit to a proper schedule at the moment#thank you for understanding
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I'm going to be so real I do not understand tim & steph shippers who feel that Steph dating Tim again would save her character. You can make an argument that giving Tim a more compelling love interest would be beneficial for him! And you can at least make an argument that the fujo mischaracterization of Steph would stop. However she'd still, inevitably, be treated as a prop character/extension for someone more popular 😭 it also wouldn't make her appear in more books! Tim doesn't have many frequent appearances at the moment either! You can just say you like the couple and want them back together without acting like you have some kind of moral stance
#ramblings of a lunatic#dc comics#dc#NOT character tagging. for reasons j feel are obvious#honestly i shouldn't even be posting this here I'm responding more to twitter sentiments but they'd cook me on there if i posted this#anyway sometimes i think ppl (again the twt ppl specifically. tumblr timsteph fans mostly normal) are doing that thing-#-where you get so deep into a hyper online discourse cycle that you end up reproducing mainstream sentiments from scratch#''let men date women!'' this is what some of you sound like when talking about timsteph to me /j#there's a lot to critique about how Tim's been written since canonizing his bisexuality!#personally I've noticed (and seen other ppl notice to) that some writers seem unaware that tim is bi#not in the sense of making him straight but in the sense that they seem to think he's gay bc none of his relationships w women-#-are acknowledged as having been. relationships#or if they are there's an idea that tim was using them to 'hide from his true self' or something#genuinely problematic sentiment!#i also don't really find the ''he should cheat on bernard!'' jokes funny#like lets bffr Tim's cheating was NEVER acknowledged as cheating he was seen as a good all-american boy#so like. bringing that trait back and acknowledging it as cheating ONLY after he comes out as bi? i get it- ironic homophobia but-#-i really don't like it!#anyway. close your eyes and focus on the daminika like the rest of us /j#or the stephcass jason dancing image which will live in my head and heart forever despite arguably being ooc as well <3#bc it's funny <3 and at least I'm self aware <3#also much MUCH more importantly DC POWER SPECIAL EXTREMELY GOOD GO READ IT FOR DUKE#and jace but i haven't read future state yet bc i tried and got. extremely bored 😞 sorry jace you seem really cool#but he's great in the story dynamjc duo with duke. loved it love them want more#special was sold out at my comic shop tho so i couldn't grab a copy. might hit the other shop in town today to see#BOOST THE NUMBERS WE NEED A POWER COMPANY ONGOING GANG#anyway yeah. tim & steph thoughts. you can just say you like them you don't have to do all that
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hey, random person on the internet, maybe don't do this?
#shoot from the hip#sorry if this is a little too serious :(#but it really is something that annoys me#like I just don't get how people find this funny#am I just taking things too seriously? probably#is it just a small edit that doesn't warrant a whole post to be made about it? again probably#is it a good use of my time and energy to get mad at the person for making the edit? absolutely not#but frankly I don't care#between this and that one “racism” edit on luke's page I'm getting tired of humouring these people's malicious edits#I was able to revert the edit almost immediately so it didn't *really* matter#but it's more so the fact that someone did this to begin with that really bothers me#this fandom is incredible and I'm in no way accusing anyone on here of doing this#honestly I just need a place to vent about my frustration#anyways rant over#(man I hate being serious like this lol praying to god that serious junyu never appears on this blog again)
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ok, once more I realize that my own kindness and friendliness has been taken for implied consent, and as always, the troubles that are brewing now are connected to OCs.
So let me be clear and frank one more time, one last time, because I have NO INTENTION of going through what I went through in 2021.
While I am always immensely happy that my Original Characters are enjoyed and that they can serve as source of inspiration, they are NOT however a template for anyone to base their OCs on.
They are not something that you can take in their entirety, change whatever suits you, and then call it your own.
It doesn't work like that, especially because, and allow me to reiterate this once and for all, OCs are *immensely* personal.
They are an extention of the soul of the person that creates them.
So taking whatever suits your fancy and use it for the "aesthetic" or the "vibes" is immensely disrespectful and, dare I say, rather impertinent, especially when both characters happen to belong to the same fandom.
Now, I am not talking about certain tropes and subjects that are typical of certain genre, of course not.
We are all somehow reinveting something that's already there when we work with OCs and stories.
What I am talking about is taking certain specific idiosyncrasies that make a certain character unique, change them to suit your character, and then being SO IMPERTINENT to just call it your own and parading it around without even having the courtesy to quote the person that has inspired you, taking advantage of the fact that I am just a small creator with a small following.
This is a huge No No for me.
Huge.
I appreciate that other creators might have a different opinion or perspective when it comes to OCs, and while I do not share entirely in that, I sure as hell respect it.
But allow me to be crystal clear: if this happens to me, like it had in 2021, that's the *easiest* way to lose all respect I might harbour for you, and I seldomly get mad or angry.
I am always accomodating, always supportive, and I think I have proven it aplenty in the past few years.
But this is something that I cannot condone nor agree with.
And it's not just a matter of ethic, in this sense: it's a matter of also hurting me, and literally put my whole creative process into shamble.
It's a matter of having respect of others.
Now, you might say: who cares if they hurt you? they are characters that do not exist, just move on and have thicker skin!
Well, as I said above, for when it concerns myself, my OCs are an extention of my own soul, a way for me to formulate and explain feelings that sometimes I have a hard time let out; a way for me to actually face, fragmentize and analyze my own trauma through them;
and most important of all, they are OFTEN a love letter to both the world I am exploring with them AND my own husband and child, such as in the case of Jacob and Dorothea,for whom, as I said often in the past 5 years, I have poured A LOT from myself and my husband's own story.
You could say that it probably my fault for having bared my feelings so much and poured so much of myself into a character;
And you might be correct, because I have learned my lesson, and ever since Dorothea and Jacob, no other character has been infused with as much of my own being as they were.
but that doesn't mean that it stings any less when I see it unravels in front of my eyes.
I am tired.
#Nemo vents#I cannot do this anymore#honestly#I am so tired#so so tired of all of this#I was supposed to work on something today to share later on but now I feel so drained that I cannot even fathom to pick up a pen#and I am always compelled to share them with the people I love that I know would support me and respect me#it's in these moments that I wish I never shared my OCs around#we'll see maybe I will manage to find a way to channel all I feel through something#I know the risk#I always weight pros and cons between the two of them#it's just too much sometimes#sorry about the rant#I just needed to let things out#no it's not about BG3#no it's not about FFXV#it's always about my favourite brainchild#it's always about Dorothea#sometimes I wish I NEVER found my way into AC Syndicate#my husband tried to console me#telling me that if it happened again it means that I created something to aspire to#but I don't want to do that#I don't care#I don't want to be an example or anything#I do not want to wear this hat and just suffer afterwards#it's a hat that I didn't ask for and that I do not want#I am just so tired#I know I have no power over this#I can do virtually nothing#I just wish things were different
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I've come to realize that I very much lack an "identity" when it comes to my interests, so when I am asked about them irl it becomes awkward. Everyone around me is a gamer to some extent and everyone is nerding on some pop culture something-or-other, but I cannot group myself into any of these things clearly.
And no, I refuse to open up about my artwork or vocal synth nonsense. I would rather keep that strongly barred from anyone off the net unless I trust them enough.
So partly it's my fault since I want to come off as unassuming as possible, but I can't help it when I worry about being scrutinized for every little thing I do or enjoy. But who hasn't felt that way, right?
In short, I know who I am but what are you going to do with that information? I don't know and it kinda scares me.
#I mean I'm kinda like this online too#I prefer to “like what I like” but that isn't as much of a big deal#because I don't necessarily need to make an impression online#but in forming relations in person it helps to find those common threads#or maybe I'm just enjoying all the “wrong” things that aren't the majority so I'm at a loss#in that case oh well I guess#I'm thinking about this aloud because I got asked about what games I'm currently playing at work#because I don't... play games regularly#and there are some things in between those genres that were asked that I do play but it's not Every game in there#and everything I'm exploring currently are older things#so I don't think people care#I don't wanna play these new games. not now. I'm sorry.#the last thing I want is to be known that I draw and I'm asked those same pain-staking questions again and again and again#so I'll remain boring to everyone around me-- and honestly it's for your own good#mew and the hot dogs
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wait a minute
stop.
stop it.
#bnha#bnha manga spoilers#mha spoilers#mha 423#I didn't hate this chapter before that#but now I am#because this is just cruel level of REMEMBER THIS?????#yes. I do remember this. I rewatched and reread this arc VERY recently#so... he killed Kurogiri with a punch like the one he did in USJ and again to save Izuku#I don't care honestly.#I reread this chapter and I cried again bc I REALLY refused to believe that Kurogiri died then#but he did with a death words to Shirakumo's friends and recall of old chapters#even if people want Tenko alive I doubt that Kurogiri will ever materialize again#and I'm deadly serious when I say that this is the worst part of this chapter#I worried for Kurogiri's existence ever since it was revealed that Shirakumo is in there#but that literally took FIVE YEARS TO APPEAR AGAIN HAVING AN IMPORTANT ROLE#and he left while crumbling just like Tomura's body before Katsuki hit him#and the last thing he thought about was about protecting Tomura even though he was partly Shirakumo's dead corpse appearing more and more#even Mic now understood that it's really is him in a way ending his arc from back in Tartarus with Aizawa#and you know what's worse??? TOMURA KNOWS THIS#the way he used “...........” with Kurogiri's name while the page literally showed his black smoke disappearing was heartbreaking before#it's worse now#like... okay he's dying too and he doesn't even know if spinner is ALIVE or not and he saw Kurogiri disappear#all while protecting him from harm one last time#AND WE STILL HAVE NO FUCKING FLASHBACKS OF HIS TIME WITH TOMURA OUTSIDE OF WHAT WE HAD IN MANGA#I'm getting more and more furious by the minute HAHA#I need to find that one sketch I did way back in 2019 with them after spoilers of Kurogiri in Tartarus#I NEED SOMETHING LIKE THAT NOW AND I CAN'T DRAW#I want to just curl up and cry myself to sleep like a 13 y.o that found out the bird that she looked after died while she was sleeping#kurogiri
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#I know this is gonna come across as a bit pathetic#but I was already feeling a bit untethered today#wondering if I actually have a purpose here#ever since I came back to tumblr after my 4 month break I've felt very alone here#it feels a bit like everyone moved on without me#and I dunno i guess I hoped I'd be able to dive right back in again and just start engaging and enjoying it#but honestly I have been plagued with anxiety and intrusive thoughts about not being wanted#and the last thing I needed was some asshole anon#I'm already wondering if people are finding my event annoying#like maybe i should just shut up and quit#but I really fucking like doing this stuff I just wish I didn't feel so isolated#I'm being stupid i know#you should never trust how you feel about yourself after 9pm#but bleurgh its a horrible feeling#shut up saz
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speaking of movieverse charles i rlly wanna know ur thoughts on the whole dark phoenix charles villain arc they try to do
i dont think they were trying to make him a 'villain'- antagonize him a bit maybe. STILL THOUGH it felt pretty forced, if at the very least out of nowhere (just like the whole bit of hank and erik bonding over raven ..... if i may be so bold to say....). raven's generally been edgy about charles throughout the movies but why did hank have to do him like that too 😭😭
i dont mind when media portrays charles as less-than-perfect- that's what makes him such an interesting character: wanting to do the right thing but inevitably being human and messing up along the way to do so, or thinking his way is right And Maybe On Paper It Is but then in action its.. not that simple
if the movie did it better then id be chill maxing Ok Cool Love It- but having hank try to act as though charles couldnt POSSIBLY be more distraught over raven's death was actually insane 💀💀💀💀
#snap chats#see this is my thing with dark phoenix#it gave me everything i wanted in terms of charles- or at least theoretically#yk showing his imperfections/he has the capacity to be imperfect.. more of him in his wheelchair AND ON THE BATTLEFIELD#bald... and then i acknowledge the rest of the movie and i need to be shot on site like UGH.#ill still be mad In General they tried to run the dark phoenix arc again like whyyyyyyy .... we didn't need to do that .....#i repeat if they wanted to do a space thing they shoulda brought in the shi'ar .... oh but i guess they.. they go into dark phoenix ...#i just wanted to see lilandra ill admit it im greedy 😔 just wanted to see charles and his space bird wife ....#honestly no if they couldve adapted another xmen plot properly i woulda like to see juggernaut done right#like its so weird that theyt just. Werent Brothers in the movies???? beyond cain suddenly being a mutant anyway#idk .. i just think it woulda been funny if raven had to find out she technically got two brothers .. explain that one to me fox...
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in a secondary, follow up note, in which no one cares (but me), full disclosure i'm a big fan of commonplace books. i keep one for every character i rp which...means i currently have a grand total of one (1) for @transistorized and it's full of mechanical and electrical engineering, space stuff, notes from books he canonically has mentioned he enjoys and i decided to read (i really do need a refresh on le morte d'arthur), stuff like that. character knowledge for the sake of having knowledge that character would have, just because i don't pick up characters easily, and when one decides to hang around, we're in it to win it.
so i guess that means i need to start a second one, because while i have a friend i can bug for mortuary stuff (he's a mortician) i'd also like to collect other fun tidbits like a magpie. and unlike with tony, who would scribble on a napkin and therefore would not give a tin shit about paper quality, it gives me an excuse to maybe use one of my everyday books from galen leather with the cosmo air light paper.
#( tbd )#// honestly i'ma be real#// i think those of us that do stuff like this#// even for rp#// (i'm an academic at heart and these are habits i can't break)#// we should talk about methodology more often#// if we do research for stuff how why how do we keep up with it#// stupid things i'll do for the vine#// like picking a specific fountain pen and sticking with it#// (maybe the 1930s sheaffer balance jr or one of the bazillion esterbrooks i've restored)#// (you know to be that much extra about it i guess)#// maybe a specific ink#// (i have a bottle of late 1940s permanent blue black just sitting there)#// (yes i am that guy leave me alone)#// anyway it makes it more fun#// than doing a google search for me#// and now i can just flip back and find that tidbit when i need it again#back by unpopular demand - me / ooc.
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Finally started watching severance, I'm a few episodes in and I have several questions, first off why does Helly only seem to own 1 pair of shoes
#ive gotten some like vague spoilers off the dash#is the wellness lady marks wife#cause i feel like ive seen 'gemma casey'#and the fact that she had gemmas candle#also the fact that shes clearly not really dead#also the fucking neighbour boss lady who's name i cant remember#do we like her or not. i honestly cant tell#whos side is she on#her own ?#also petey </3 thought he was gonna last longer i liked him#also i need to see more like innie vs outie of the same person bc i love innie helly but i hope outie helly never comes on screen again#i hate that bitch#but its the same person ??#i saw a post about how their personalities are inherent but their values are circumstantial and i find it rlly interesting#also outie irving sounds like a bad bitch based on his wellness routine thing#if all that was actually true and not just shit they make up to make the innies feel better...#oh also bringing it back to marks not dead wife#if that is true then :/ i kinda shipped mark and helly so idk how thats gonna work#i feel like outie mark and innie helly would get along great at first but ultimately crash and burn#innie mark and outie helly from what ive seen so far would be great#well not great. great as in theyd work out#but theyd be toxic af#HOWEVER both of their outies would fucking despise each other#and honestly the dynamic between their innies is probably my fav i love them wtf#hes known her for like thirty seconds and hes already taking the fall when she fucks up and trying to save her and what have you#like im sorry idk what this says about me but. that would absolutely work on me#also irving & christopher walken <3 wtf <3 im obsessed <3#although theres defo something weird going on with christopher walken so i hope he doesnt break my heart#...or irvings heart but more importantly mine#also i love christopher walken in literally everything hes in hes such a treasure
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if dorian didn't show up, do you think louis would have shot minnie?
I do. I know some people think either he wouldn't have or he would've missed so that's why the writers had him shoot Dorian instead, but mmmmmm no, I don't personally think so. I like to think that if he had taken the shot, his shaky hands would've caused him to shoot her fatally.
Mostly because I'm already so normal about the fact that of the Ericson crew, Marlon and Louis are the only ones with a body count. Well, that we know of, but shown to us in the game, at least. Plus, we know it's Louis' first kill.
Like yeah, Clementine and AJ become part of the crew and they have bigger body counts, and if we're counting indirect kills caused by actions, then Tenn has a count... and I guess everyone has blood on their hands for blowing up the boat... but I'm talking about killed directly with a weapon like....... I lied, I'm not normal about that at all, Louis and Marlon are the ones who have killed someone in Louis' route. I'm also not normal about the fact that Louis kills Dorian and then even as he's clearly in shock, he tries to go with Clementine to get AJ, and then later on when they talk about it, he says it feels like bile but not quite and he's glad he has it in him to do it.... listen, listen, listen... I'm obsessed with that.
Anyway, so if Louis shot Minerva, I think he would've accidentally killed her and can you imagine? He's already enough of a mess after killing the woman who pinned him down and tried to cut his finger off [or succeeded] but he knew Minerva, they were friends before the twins were taken. Even Violet couldn't kill her even though that would've been the smarter thing to do, and we know thanks to meta knowledge that killing her would've saved lives, but Violet couldn't, and I don't think Louis would intentionally either.
Speaking of Violet, if Louis killed Minerva, I hate to think about what that would've done to Vi. I think she might've actually left at that point, like what was planned before it got changed to her being burned. I don't think she would've attacked Louis over it, though, like yeah she attacked Clementine in the cell but Louis? I don't know, but I don't think so just because it's Louis and he'd be a mess about it anyway.
Though if he did kill her, it would be a neat parallel to draw... y'know, because Louis forgave AJ for killing Marlon even though he was pissed and heartbroken, and Violet was annoyed with him the entire time... but could she ever forgive Louis for killing Minerva? Y'know? We already have a similar parallel with AJ shooting Tenn, but still.
If Clementine killed Minerva in that moment, though, then I could see Violet attacking her since in her eyes, Clem proved her right.
So yeah, I get why they added the Dorian kill to his route. It adds another compelling element to Louis as a character, but we also need Minerva alive for episode 4; Louis can't kill her, he can't miss, and he's not going to stay with her because we need Violet to stay on the boat and him to be on shore for all routes.
#asks#twdg louis#twdg minerva#twdg clementine#twdg violet#twdg marlon#twdg tenn#honestly whenever i see someone say louis is the boring option i'm just like '.......that's your opinion but also how can you say that??'#then again i'm sure other people look at me saying violentine just isn't for me and they say the same thing so y'know... i can't talk haha#also time is such a weird thing because i look at the entire cell scene in louis' route and like... i'm not even mad about violet anymore#like yeah i still don't believe she was brainwashed like i'm sorry y'all only believe that because kent said something about it#not because there's all this evidence toward it in game like vi being pissed at clementine makes sense she doesn't need to be brainwashed#for it to work like her being vulnerable and easily manipulated into submission makes perfect sense especially with minerva there#it's like everyone was pissed that she attacked clementine and people needed a way to excuse it so it's not violet's fault when like...#that's literally what makes it interesting like calm down it's okay if violet is pissed and scared and behaves accordingly#also my controversial opinion of the day that i'll hide here in the tags so maybe people won't find it sksksk but#I personally find the concept of vinerva and the doomed tragedy of it more compelling than anything violentine did#like i'll defend violentine and i do believe it's an important and good ship it's just not my personal favorite#anyway but then the whole thing with lilly and minerva is so good and louis screaming FUCK YOU at minerva?? amazing love it so good#i love when the soft character who never chooses violence is so pissed off that all that anger they have boils to the surface and it's raw#like... he's SO mad he's SO furious he's SOOO UPSET like he wasn't even like this when marlon died or anything like he hit his limit#and then shooting dorian through the mouth while an accident is just well done i love it and i love his reaction of mortification#and apologizing and YET he still tries to go with clementine he's trembling and can barely string together a sentence but he wants to go#he wants to help her he wants to save aj THAT is the gut reaction he has after everything that just went down#'louis isn't loyal or good for clem because of the vote' babe tell me you don't understand any nuance of louis' character without telling m#it's fine IT'S FINE you don't have to agree and i just have to remind myself that it's fine not everyone likes louis we're okay#this drives me crazy in the best way like y'know what? i love the cells scene in louis' route all of it even the stuff i used to rant about#even the stuff that used to piss me off now i'm just like 'no wait past cj was dumb she wasn't looking at it this way aaaaaaaa' sksksks#that was my tag ted talk about the cell scene thank you
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I think about that tiktok trend where you like paint your partners eye color on your nails or make a bracelet or something with the color a lot actually
#like its so cute honestly but sometimes i wonder how hard it would actually be to like find the right color match#maybe one day... but for now probably expect oc art with this trend in it maybe 💀#the thing about it too is i have like dark eyes and idk if ive ever seen like a dark brown nail polish. beads or thread yeah but ya#oh nvm i googled. it exists i just dont pay attention ig#OH you know what i can do... i can paint pepperonis eye color on my nails.... my baby... my kitty......#dude it feels like 5 am why is it only 2#amyways. 4 monsters was a big mistake i think... i feel quite icky...#it doesnt help i didnt eat for a majority of the day it was just monster. im really unhealthy. need water maybe#wait i was talking about nail polish how did i get here#i just want to actually do cute couple things. i must heal. im gonna be so healthy.#its fine. lmao. i just know im not ready#oh i did eat btw dont worry lmao i had. chicken nuggets#i actually have to eat more bc i need to gain back some weight or they wont let me donate plasma#my extra pokemon money..... nawr...#i dropped like 10 pounds. my current job is very physical. lots of scuttling around.#i thought about working out too? i had a short phase last year in like spring or something where i started doing workout type stuff#so like.. maybe. probably should. healtly mindset shit yk#i also maybe want some more clothes. like update my wardrobe a bit. really figure out my style.#like some cool shirts and maybe pants. cause i wear a lot of the same stuff#also again. dropped weight so. need better fitting pants.....#i want more mens pants. big pockets... gender....#anyways. nice chatting with you besties. love you guys my silly little tumblr besties.#some of you that follow this sideblog have supported me on here for a while. i see you. i appreciate you. thank you 💖#genuinely there are names that pop up and im like !! hello!!! its you!!!!!#you guys probably know who you are. go get yourself a little treat you deserve it. or like. idk what you enjoy.#play a good game. watch your favorite show. idk. be happy. love yourself.#this also goes out to those of you who are more passive on my blog. i appreciate you too!! thank you!#all my little tumblr followers.... my besties..... unles you are a bot i havent cleared out lmao#k i might have to go to bed idk im tired well see
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Okay I haven't talked about Judas OR the Judas album in a while so I'm going to share this analysis I finally placed and I'm losing my mind about
In the song Field of Blood (song 5,) the chorus ends with a line I've never quite been able to find a suitable conclusion about. Right. (Putting my rambling under a read more, the screenshots make this long)
Oh, okay, "what is my god," he's having a crisis of faith. Why is God so cruel as to order Jesus be killed (reminder that the album is a mix of biblical and Gnostic canon, where Jesus asked Judas to be the one to betray him.)
WRONG
If we move two tracks ahead in the album to Death is Just a Kiss Away, right before the last chorus we have these lines:
Which is insane! Because this part is actually saying "you have two gods, God and Jesus" (sun and moon, as I'll get to) "and no matter which you choose" (obeying the kill command or refusing to kill Jesus) "you're going to piss everyone off"! Okay now I know, "but where did you get sun and moon/God and Jesus" and HERE I TELL YOU:
Jesus is CONSTANTLY referred to with constellation imagery! (There's a whole song about it!) The Gospel of Judas includes the quotes (from Jesus) "Judas, your star has led you astray" and "the star that leads the way is your star." The album takes this and RUNS with it. Makes Jesus Judas's guiding star. There is SO MUCH night/star symbolism going on here, mostly in Constellation, but also from A World Where we Belong:
SO BASICALLY: considering that Jesus is heavily referred to with night sky imagery and they're literally both referred to as "two moons aligned," it isn't unreasonable to conclude that the line from Just a Kiss Away is in fact talking about God/Jesus. WHICH MEANS
When Judas is about to hang himself and he pleadingly asks "what is my god?"
HE DOESN'T KNOW IF IT'S GOD OR JESUS BECAUSE HE'S FUCKING IN LOVE WITH HIM APNDOANSOANS HE OBEYED GOD BECAUSE HE'S GOD BUT HE'S KILLING HIMSELF OVER JESUS. I HAVE MANY OTHER LINES ABOUT THIS (DEVOTION TO JESUS, NOT GOD) BUT THAT'S A DIFFERENT TOPIC
#AGGGGGHHHHHHH#yeah hey long time no judas#in case you guys thought i was over it#i am not fucking tagging this anything searchable no one needs to go in the judas iscariot tag and see me being insane#however much the english major roomie says im doing insane level analysis#i think im just insane actually#like. im CORRECT. but im still insane#also @ the 'what is my god' like. cruelty pondering#i would have accepted that as a face answer IF there wasnt biblical canon mixed in#since heaven and hell are mentioned this is very much not referring to the gnostic figure#nebro/yaldabaoth or saklas#the gnostic and terrible little shits ruling over earth#okay now that this is back from rhode island (the void)#@ the last attached image from a world but also ig the whole post#reminder that judas kills himself after betraying jesus (the whole point of field of blood)#and that its so incredibly interesting that presumably as hes dying judas is asking to be brought to jesus (the stars)#instead of heaven which is honestly also its own thing considering the prior acknowledgement of heaven and hell#because the stars is both jesus and the divine realm (not heaven)#i think im gonna run out of tags i need to stop#im not rereading this again OR adding insane rambling tags again i am hitting post#woe. be subjected to my post boy#okay people have Found this post so clarification this is about the lord of the lost judas album#if anyone else finds this thing i specifically did not tag
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