#i love them all very much but i think my future health should be a concern? :(

[vingler-mirror]

Reverse 1999 KR released a special video for Pepero Day (Pocky Day), so here's an amateur translation of it by me:

Sonetto: Timekeeper, we organized all the letters we received on the day of the celebration and distributed them to everyone in the suitcase.

Vertin: Except for those who didn't receive the letter because of their duties, everyone replied with sincerity.

Sonetto: That's right! X sent us this "Scene Recreation Phonograph." How about we read the letters aloud with this?

Vertin: Then let's listen to it together.

"Regulus, take off your sunglasses!"

Regulus: Huh? You still haven't seen this Captain's face? That's okay, you'll get plenty of opportunities to see this Captain's cool appearance in the future. Save that moment for a bigger party!

"I never thought I'd like apples in my life... Mr. APPLe... don't drink too much and live a healthy life with Captain for a long time~!! To Mr. APPLe"

Mr. APPLe: Ah, a letter full of affection for me, Mr. APPLe. Thank you very much, but don't worry. The juice of this Apple flows smoothly and won't be thickened by alcohol.

"The Best First Line of Defense Discipline Assistant in the world!"

Matilda: Huh! It's obviously a letter addressed to me! But you must have been nervous? I think you forgot to write your letter. It's okay, I know what you want to say to this great Matilda Bouanich.

"To Alphabet No. 1. Stop drinking coffee and exercise."

X: Hahaha... the "Automatic Eating Sandbag" and the "Step Controller" are both working well. I don't think I'll need any more athletic inventions for the time being.

"Dear Ms. Campbell, you've always worked hard. I'm a human, but if you want, I can show you how I eat 100 tooth fairies. May all the people in the world eat tooth fairies as you wish... I love you, Ms. Campbell"

Tooth Fairy: Tooth fairies have good healing properties and taste delicious. But if you eat too many at once, it's not good for your health. I appreciate the thought, but please don't eat 100 tooth fairies, okay?

*The letter is a doodle of Marcus saying "Maaang"

Marcus: "Maaaang." "Maaang?" "Mang..." "Maaang!" (I beg you to listen to the VA saying this line, you won't regret it)

Marcus: I saw this word written a lot in the letters I received, but what does it mean? No matter how much I read it, I can't understand it...

"37 = 1² + 6²"

37: What a witty letter! The person who wrote this letter must have a cool number. 29, 41... or maybe 53?

"Dear Lucy, are you thinking of adding a USB-C charging port in the future?"

Lucy: It is true that experiments on the efficiency of data transfer via USB are being conducted in Laplace. The so-called USB charging method USB-C...

Lucy: Data error

Sonetto: Timekeeper, are you all right?

Vertin: It's okay, X's invention must have broken again

Sonetto: I'm glad you're okay, but the play button on the phonograph seems to be broken. Fortunately, the record function is working fine, so we should be able to record our replies to the letters.

Vertin: I trust X's machine, but we still have to be careful.

Vertin: Okay, let's get started.

Sonetto: Look at this, Timekeeper. It's a letter with a drawing of me! Next to the drawing, it says, "you found a good poem for me."

Sonetto: Thank you so much! I should probably write a poem in return, but... it'll take some time, so I'll express my gratitude instead.

Vertin: *reading the letter* "Vertin, please eat well and have a good time."

Vertin: Of course, I don't only eat sugary candies instead of food. I'll take care of myself. Thank you.

Sonetto: Don't worry, I'll be responsible for the Timekeeper's diet.

Sonetto: By the way, can I deliver this recordings to the people who wrote the letters?

Vertin: X's machine always give us surprise, so let's trust it again this time.

[fxggotclown]

sometimes i want my friends to care enough about me that they wear masks to reduce the likelihood that i get covid or the flu again and get more chronically ill . but currently thats like . too much to ask of anyone apparently. ughhghg

[brujaluas]

what made you and them unique to each other?

double tarot reading from each other's perspective <3

you guys… this reading gave me a lot of work SO I THINK IT WOULD BE GREAT IF YOU SHOW IN SOME WAY IF YOU LIKED THE READING, BE IT BY COMMENTING, OR AT LEAST FAVORITE IT HERE, IF NOT I WILL LET MY LATIN MOTHER SPIRIT ACT UPON YOU, but this is obviously not a threat, I love you like I love Hello Kitty, without further ado, let's go!!!!

pile 1

why did your future spouse choose you over anyone else?

hm, your future spouses are the naughty type hehe, they felt an intense attraction to you right from the first moment, as soon as they laid eyes on you they wanted to infiltrate your skin, they found you the hottest, most interesting, most attractive and captivating person they have ever met and look, they have met a lot of people lol but don't think superficially, they felt that you are the light of their life, the sun, the earth, the moon and the stars (too poetic)

why did you choose your future spouse over another?

They gave you a sense of freedom and space, some here like or need to learn to be alone, in their solitude and they gave you that space, for you to love yourself, and they also saw your worst, you may meet them at a bad time in your life, you may even be frustrated because you didn't want to meet your spouse in such circumstances but they will see your worst, you think you should trust only to yourself but this not true, they will choose to stay, without any strings attached and leaving you free the way you like but always giving you a message of being close by.

pile 2

why did your future spouse choose you over anyone else?

they will see you as someone very cool, you will be the best friend they were asking the universe for, it is as if you brought relief to their lives, even if you fight a lot here, you find a way to get back together, it is as if they had a lot of traumas and were starting to have new deep connections with people and you would be there from the beginning

why did you choose your future spouse over another?

they have an excellent masculine energy that makes you feel very good and comfortable, they are responsible, they are great providers in your life, they love and adore you very much and you feel this love, it is as if they tell you exactly what to do for you to see that you are truly loved by them.

pile 3

why did your future spouse choose you over anyone else?

Well, they may have been through a lot of turbulent things in their lives, including health problems, and you may have the chance to meet them when they are feeling down, but somehow, you will act as the best doctor they could ever receive, a therapist, a friend, a shoulder to cry on, the solution to their problems, they will start to find life beautiful again because you will show them that life is worth living.

I AM IN TEARS

why did you choose your future spouse over another?

Hmm, you have had bad relationships where your partners brought out the worst in you, you could have constant jealousy, possessiveness and aggressiveness with words or attitudes, when in fact you are not like that, but unfortunately when we are with low vibration people they always bring out the worst in us, which is regrettable, you have already sacrificed a lot in this life, but now with your spouse all this is behind you, you can act like the loving person that you are, the sweet person you were born to be

(hug me sisters and brothers)

[tarotwithavi]

What do you need to know right now?

How to choose a pile?

Close your eyes and take a deep breath and ask the angels to show you the right pile for you and open your eyes. The first pile that catches your attention is the right pile for you.

Masterlist

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THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR LOVE AND SUPPORT 🫶🏻💗

Pile 1

Is there something you should not be eating? I see that you use food as an escape or whenever you are sad, you eat something specific; this can be bad for your health, especially if it's popcorn, chocolate, or some kind of processed food. Try to eat mindfully and healthily. Pay attention to what you're consuming. If you want to, you can decorate your room with fairy lights because I see that it will help you a lot. Do not sit in complete darkness. Think of being alone as an opportunity to expand and grow. Don't be upset; you can utilize your time by doing things that will help you in the future. Your time is really precious, and you should not waste it.

Pile 2

Do not rush into conclusions and give your decisions some time. You are being told to wait until winter comes because there is something you are planning to do now, but it will be better to do it in winter. All your hard work is going to pay off, and you need to prepare yourself for the upcoming abundance. For that, you will need to release any mental blocks that you may have and know that you are capable of doing anything you want. There is a new beginning in something; some of you may be starting college this year. Your next chapter is going to be really beautiful. You are going to make a lot of connections and befriend people who actually want the best for you.

Pile 3

Be very honest and clear about what you want to attract in your life. Be really careful of what you wish for because some of you are not really considering what you want. You are being told to step forward without looking back. Let your past go, learn lessons from it, and use it as motivation rather than something to get upset over. Let yourself shine; do not dim your light for others because others want to get their light from you. Do not feel guilty for getting attention. You are meant to do great things in life. Why are you afraid of transformations? In my perspective, transformation is one of the most beautiful things. Yes, the process can be painful, but the result is always beautiful. Write down your wishes on a piece of paper and things you are grateful for on another piece of paper and read them out loud.

Pile 4

You need to go outside and have fun; you won't be a teenager forever. You need to see your current situation with crystal-clear clarity. Realize you're actually living the life you once dreamt of. Sometimes it's actually you who is holding yourself back from getting all the things that you want, and you need to recognize your unhealthy habits that are not helping you. Some of you may resonate with pile 2 or 3 too. You are being told to work on your intuition. Trust yourself, your emotions, and your instincts. Stop ignoring your feelings and start working on them.

[starwell-tarot]

PAC: What part of you requires some introspection this summer? ⛱️

Pick a pile reading: What aspect of yourself or your life needs some thinking over? What questions should you be asking yourself this summer to get to know yourself better?

Pile 1-3, left to right

Pick the picture you feel most drawn to. If you feel drawn to more than one of them, you can read the interpretation to multiple piles.

Disclaimer: All my readings contain themes of mental and emotional struggles and pains as they strive to comfort those. I don't intend on rubbing you the wrong way and I'm doing this with the hope I can help people feel better, but if it doesn't work I might just not be the right person to comfort you.

Disclaimer: I'm not a mental health professional in any way. Although my tarot readings focus on giving emotional and mental reassurance, I can only give you as much as a friend could give you - encouraging words, friendly advice, a shoulder to cry on or a metaphorical hug. Please take in the information responsibly, and if your mental health is greatly affecting your day to day functions, please consider looking for a professional if possible. I'm afraid I can't be more than a tarot-enthusiastic friend.

Take what resonates and leave what doesn't. Take care of yourselves and remember hope is your best friend. 🖤

Pile 1 - VIII of Pentacles, Four of Wands, Knight of Swords, Balsamic Moon

Who do I dream of becoming?

The key elements in your reading are your dreams and hard work.

It seems like you have a very clear idea of how your ideal life would look like, and it's beautiful. So beautiful in fact, that the cards depict a twirling dance, gracious and romantic. There is a version of you that you have fallen in love with, but I fear you think it's unreachable. You might have put some work into it already, into reaching your goals, and yet you still feel far away from what you want to achieve. But do not rush.

No big dream in life is easily accessible to grab. They require patience and perseverance, and a lot of obstacles must be overcome before you can finally feel you've gotten everything you ever wanted. The key here is, you must avoid self-sabotage. Perhaps you are insecure, or you lack self-belief, or you get easily discouraged. Know that failure is only the path to success, so look into the lesson you can learn from your mistakes, instead of letting them consume you. Look ahead to the future fully, and break down the demons in your head into tiny little digestible pieces. Identify all of your obstacles, the things (or people) that might stand in-between you and the version of you you dream of. Think of ways you can solve these obstacles, one by one, slowly and surely. Go into the smallest of details when you question what is stopping you, where exactly you stand right now, and everything you want to achieve. Plan and be meticulous.

The balsamic moon gives the advice that, in order to become this dream version of yourself, you must first let go of all the limitations you've put onto yourself, taken from the past you've lived. Your past circumstances should not define you anymore, and you must allow yourself to change and live as though you are truly reborn into the person you want to be. 💚

Pile 2 - The Lovers R, Knight of Wands, Balsamic Moon

Who am I becoming?

The key elements in your reading are self-image and transformations.

It seems that for a very long time, you thought you knew exactly who you were and what you needed. You didn't feel much need to change the way you were doing things, and you were wearing your own personal colors permanently, and they were painting a self image of you. And lately, there's new colors on the canvas. And you don't know what to do with them. It is almost like discovering there's a whole another person living in your body, a strange experience of newly acquired self-knowledge. This can be uncomfortable, but know we as people are always expanding. Whether you are changing for good or for bad (this is also subjective) it is something you must embrace and address. If you fear you are turning into an unknown, malefic force, figure out what is making you act this way, and face the demon in the mirror. There's darkness in all of us, and we're allowed to be imperfect, but we must not let it consume us. Tell the darkness you see it, you acknowledge it and you'll work hard to heal it so that it doesn't burst out again. If you feel you're turning into something unfamiliar and strange, but not exactly bad, you must address what it brings into your life. Perhaps it's a change you needed. Perhaps you're on your path to growth, and that's always confusing.

All in all, do not resist strangeness and changes in yourself - instead, identify these changes, welcome them in, and let them talk to you. Let them tell you what they need from you, what presents they bring, or what old beliefs they want to replace. The balsamic moon gives the advice that you should be open to change, for that's what defines the future moment. The past cannot change, it is merely a limitation. Do not limit yourself, and instead let the future gently sway you. 💛

Pile 3 - Ace of Cups, Knight of Wands, New Moon

Why am I afraid of saying yes?

The key elements of your reading are self-love and opportunities.

I feel like you are in a very strange situation of almost… procrastinating self-love. You know you deserve more, but you cannot bring yourself to accept it. But deep inside, you know.

Deep inside you know you bring beautiful things into the world. Deep inside you know your quirks are not negative as you see them. Deep inside I think you know you deserve all the love in the world. You simply must accept it, so that you can finally let yourself receive all the beautiful things you've been denying yourself of having. I fear what is keeping you stuck is heavy and tangled, binding you to this version of yourself that is afraid to ask for more. These binds must be untangled. Try to think why you are denying all the blessings - what makes you believe all of these negative things about yourself? Once you find the cause, ask yourself if that situation is, in fact, still relevant to the person you are today. Once you let go of your old belief systems, you can finally be free. And if the fear of change is strong, or you cannot let go of your beliefs, ask yourself: what is the worst thing that could happen if I love myself a bit today? Who's stopping me from doing that?

The new moon gives the advice that the hardest part of everything is always the start. However, once you begin to allow a little kindness, a little love to grace you, things will slowly become less and less uncomfortable. Baby steps can take you a long way. It is time you allow your life to become beautiful. 💙

I hope this reading was useful to you!

Please consider leaving some feedback so I know if my readings resonate well. 🖤

While introspection is hugely important for self development, do not forget having fun is just as important for the mental health! So go have fun this summer 😉

If you enjoy my work, please consider buying me a Ko-Fi.

©starwell-tarot do not copy, translate or repost.

[hoseoksluna]

YOU'RE NOT DIRTY | myg

pairing: ex boyfriend!yoongi x f. reader

genre: fluff

word count: 2.4k

summary: he, who has always been able to untangle the ropes of chaos that is your mental health, helps you when you need to not be alone for once.

warnings: demonization of sex, anxiety, fear, crying & all kinds of iffy feelings about sex, yoongi being perfect

note: this was purely written as a way to heal and cope with the fact i felt extremely dirty after writing my last smut fic 'story'. if you've been following me and reading the little updates i post, you already know this. while this fic is loosely based on 'story', it's not necessary that you read it if you haven't, although namjoon is mentioned. i'd spent over a week writing this and every day had been a step closer to feeling better and it's all thanks to yoongi. he's always been the person who helped me with my mental health, especially when d-day came out. it had to be him. he's linked to this part of me forever. enjoy reading guys &lt;3

“You’re not dirty.”

Those words should comfort you. Those words should rip away those sleazy fingers of the ghost that touches you—the ghost of shame, who mocks the touches of the lover you were with barely an hour ago. But those words do anything but. 

The man, who uttered them, studies your ashen face. He doesn’t see the demon’s large body on top of yours, constricting your airflow. Nobody ever does.

He doesn’t see the way the ghost scrapes the surface of your skin with its long claws; how its flimsy, wet and tattered cape deepens the wound with its rough fabric as bile rises in your throat. How could anyone?

It hurts.

It hurts to the point that you think your sexuality is that demon. That anytime a person of the opposite sex would touch you from now on, he would somehow beckon that hostile creature to come and collect you, slimy hands grasping yours and pulling you in—the touch so deathly that the sordidness would seep into your skin and make a bed in you. Then, the torture would begin all over again.

Shortness of breath. The feeling of your body being dirty and heavy. The distaste towards sex and men that follows after. The despair; the loss of hope that life could be possibly normal for you sometime in the future.

Despite it being such a hefty feeling, only a small part of you regards as true that this is someone else’s fault. It’s devastatingly pathetic.

The majority of your being believes that the foulness is yours. That you’re the one to blame. You believe that it’s your decision and your repulsive actions that stain you. And if that wasn’t enough, the certain question of why links arms with that belief, troubles you along the way, and it becomes much, much worse.

Why does filling a dose of hormones that you lack, that you need for your well-being leave you feeling like you did something very bad?

And, also, another one.

Why does enjoying yourself with another person—becoming close with them in a way that is tempestuous, dizzying and beautiful in such a simple sense, in a way that makes life truly worth living—why does it leave you with those burdening thoughts, soiled body and even grimier conscience? 

Those questions fill you up with dark clouds with no stars, dense and thick ones that weigh your body down. You walk through your daily life with trembling legs. And it’s all forced. You’d rather not feel that way, but it comes over you, swallowing you whole, and you have no strength to fight back. It’s all very frustrating. There’s nothing you can do.

The man’s words should take the edge off this discomfort, the lull and the softness of his tone—the maturity, complexity and dependability of his persona the very warmth that coats his voice—like a damp towel to all your gashes and sores. Help you in some way that you’re unable to help yourself. Perhaps lift the body off of you like Atlas held the world above his head. But they don’t.

And it’s Yoongi. The man you love, even if the state of your relationship is chastely friendly at the moment.

It’s Yoongi, who picked you up in the rain pouring down on you woefully, perfuming your hair with the sweetest, most heady scent of the forest. Yoongi, who gave you his clothes—boxers that fit you comfortably, even if they are a little loose in certain areas, gray sweatpants that decorate the ivory waistband of the Calvins, an old shirt, quite an expensive one, warm and cozy from the dryer. 

Yoongi, who let a velvety blanket fall on your shivering figure once you’ve showered, dressed, and rested comfortably on his couch, placing a light pink bowl filled with cheese puffs on your lap, knowing how much you love the color and the snack, too. Yoongi, who typed the title of your favorite Korean drama into the Netflix search bar, thumb clicking on the up, down, left and right buttons on the remote control, even though he hates doing so and prefers the voice search. Yoongi, who opted for muted leniency to waft through the room, turning off the big lights, sound low, fingers having finished typing the title: ‘It’s Okay Not To Be Okay’.

It should do something. But it doesn’t.

You’re incapable of looking him in the eyes. You just numbly gaze down at the orange tastiness, plopping another one into your mouth, swallowing down the bile. You dissociate, eyes defocusing, the pressure to respond to him a distant siren alarm at the back of your mind. 

A solid, peculiar peace steps over the threshold of your mind to check if it’s welcome before it takes a step back and walks the other way, the stench of the mold of your feelings pushing it away. 

Must have been his. 

He’s careful before he says what he wants to say in its entirety.

Yoongi takes his hands off of your forearms. The glint of his silver watch pulls you out of your detachment. Guilt pricks you at the nape of your neck over the fact that he’s trying and you’re too numb to receive it from him. You will your body to be normal, but it stays the way it is.

You had told him briefly in the car, amidst the onrush of your liquid emotions, that you felt that way. Dirty, soiled, ashamed of your perverseness. He didn’t comment on it, driving in silence. He knew that if he spoke too soon, you wouldn’t hear him—choosing to place your palm on the stick shift instead, holding your hand like that.

It struck you with the notion that you spoke too much. Did too much. That you should’ve just stayed quiet, stayed without feeling until he killed the engine at your apartment, until the door softly clicked behind you. You didn’t hear the language of his hand, all the words that gesture said. Instead, you listened to the false words in your brain.

You’re bothering him. He doesn’t care. He thinks you’re annoying. You should’ve called an Uber or you shouldn’t have come at all. You should’ve been home, depriving yourself of life, of excitement, of love and pleasure. 

But Yoongi didn’t drive you home—he didn’t drive down the familiar path to your apartment. And Yoongi didn’t speak because he knows you better than you know yourself. 

He wanted you to pour out the rain of your clouds before his words could tear them apart with sunlight. It wasn’t his intention to make you suffer more than you already did. 

You didn’t know this, though.

“Did you hear what I said?” the grim man asks, the grave acrimony to his voice alerting you and you feel so bad. So, so very bad.

A silky waterfall of his ebony hair brushes the tops of his cheekbones. You notice how the similarly colored hood of his sweatshirt envelops his neck in warmth, merging the hues into one color within the dimness of the living room. Looking down at your crisscrossed legs, mimicking his, you unfurl the blanket over his thighs. It pulls you into one unity with him, his steadfastness reaching for you.

“I did, Yoongi,” you say, wanting to be honest within the environment you find yourself in. “I just don’t know what to say.”

“Did he make you feel that way?” Yoongi folds his arms over his chest. Leans over the backrest. Suddenly you’re aware of the distance between the two of you. Glad that the blanket is big enough. “Dirty?”

It’s a question that hurts because you wish you could change your answer.

“I wish he did.” Your voice wobbles. Somehow his calm demeanor cracks yours, pushing the voices aside. “It would’ve been easier.”

If Namjoon were the one who hauled the words at you instead of your brain—if it were his touches that dug a hole in your heart instead of the ghost—you wouldn’t be sniffling your nose, willing your tears to go back where they came from. It’s all you and the broken interior of your body. Namjoon treated you perfectly, having invited you over to his residence near the woods. He didn’t make love to you, but he did play with you, coaxing moans out of you that echoed through his mansion. You enjoyed yourself, even though you enjoyed pleasuring him a little more.

Perhaps, that’s the biggest problem of it all.

“What do you mean by that?”

“It would’ve been easier ‘cause I would’ve blamed him.” You sigh, averting your gaze, plucking out fluff from the blanket on your knee. 

Yoongi runs his fingers through his hair to sweep it away from his eyes. His leisure position sinks him deeper into the dimness as he lowers his body into the cushions, arms back on his chest. 

“There’s no one to blame, though,” he says simply, biting his lower lip. 

You don’t know what to say. Busying yourself, you take a sip of the can of Sprite Yoongi got for you, aware of the strange emptiness within the walls of your mind. There’s always some kind of noise, some kind of accusation towards you. You’ve become used to it, learned to live with it. It’s a strange newness, this silence. You don’t know what to do with it. 

“You did nothing wrong,” he continues, voice so warm and so deep, despite its monotonicity. 

You merely shrug your shoulders. 

Yoongi reaches forward and places a hand on your left shoulder. As if to stop your stubbornness from overwhelming your body. You feel the heat of his palm and your mouth rounds in a pout. There’s energy in it—some kind of energy that mends you. His words are tall pillars that you slowly make your way over to, leaning against their coolness. Lukewarmness. 

You discover that it feels better. The heat of his touch, the coolness of his solemnity. It creates a temperature that your body responds to, walks away from the hostile creature. 

Before he had spoken, Yoongi touched you. Placed his palms in the crooks of your arms. But it didn’t affect you—and it’s because he hadn’t spoken. Now that he has, it whirs with some kind of spark in you that speaks the language of your body. 

“Do you understand what I’m saying?” Yoongi asks, lowering his head, eyes up, so he can look more deeply into yours. Perhaps read an answer. Any reaction that would tell him that he can move forward. 

You remain quiet, but you reciprocate the eye contact. And you do it for a reason. Now that your mind is empty, you desire for him to fill it. 

You shake your head.

Yoongi cups the side of your neck. Brushes your hair away from your face with his other hand. Inches closer. Pecks you gently on the forehead. 

The gesture squeezes the clouds in you and rain pours out. It trickles out of your tear ducts, down your pallid cheeks. Yoongi leans against your temple. Doesn’t let himself see those raindrops, but he knows they’re there. 

“You did nothing wrong by enjoying sex and you’re not dirty because you had it. It doesn’t stain you. Do you know what it does instead, though?” He whispers, keeping his voice low just for you; waits for your response. 

You shake your head ‘no’ once more, your shoulders relaxing now that you’re being held, now that you’re being spoken to, filled, made new. 

“It paints you golden. Glittery. And all colors of the rainbow are in that glitter. It’s all over you and it’s in you. And do you know the reason?” 

This time he doesn’t wait. Your tears soak the thick fabric of his sweatshirt and a rosy flush floods your cheeks in their place. You sob, and the sound is muffled.

“It’s because you had a good time. Good experiences paint you in all kinds of different ways. You just have to open your eyes to see them. All those colors.  Wait a bit before you can try ‘em all out. It takes time, doesn’t it?” 

You nod, and you do it so many times that your head spins, whimpering at the sudden lightness that your body welcomes. Yoongi hugs you, enclasps you in his arms. The blanket falls to the ground and it’s his body that keeps you warm, the ghost shoved away. You continue to cry until not one cloud fits in your ribcage, Yoongi’s words being the bodies that settle there, cleaning up the disorder they left there. Bodies speckled with the same glitter he talked about, myriads of silver, violet and blue flakes spelling the abbreviation of his name: MYG. 

I have glitter inside of myself.

You repeat it to yourself as your lungs calm down, regular breaths soothing your fragile form still held by Yoongi. He caresses the back of your head, fingers smoothing down your hair, making sure it cascades down your back in one singular stream. 

Lifting your head like a toddler on its belly, you do the same for Yoongi. You brush his hair away from his face, thumb stopping to caress at his cheek. Yoongi puckers his lips at you, hauls you a bit further upwards on his body. Mimics you again, fondling your cheek blooming with a new color. 

“No matter what you do with whoever you choose, you’ll always be a good girl,” he murmurs, the pad of his thumbs flicking away the last teardrops under your eyes, swiping tenderly across the intricate fan of your wet eyelashes. 

You believe him, so you nod, chin quivering with another onrush of emotions but nothing comes out. You don’t say it, but you have a confidence in the notion that your body will be eternally his. 

And you ponder it in your brain, softly, as Yoongi leans over and sets a tangerine down on the top of his chest. You come to terms with it being the current reality while he peels it for you. And you fully believe it and accept it when he feeds you the half moons. One by one, painting the walls of your mind with the faintest color of orange—the very reflection of a morning sunlight pouring in. 

A solid peace, no longer peculiar, steps over the threshold of that suddenly illuminated room, and it doesn’t leave this time. It swings the door closed, the sound of the click the very announcement of stability coming to stay. 

© 2024 hoseoksluna, all rights reserved

BACK to masterlist

[factual-fantasy]

25 asks! Thank you! :}} 👹

I have it in the back of my mind, but I haven't actually made any steps in making more master posts.. 😔

ReBLOGGING is good! Its a feature of Tumblr and helps more people find my artwork! Very nice :))

RePOSTING is stealing my art and posting it on your own account. Giving you and only you all the credit. That's theft and no good!

I think I remember wanting my sona to be an object head of some kind. I think I doodled probably a dozen different ideas before I got frustrated and just scribbled my most recent attempt out.

But then it hit me. I doodled two little white eyes on the scribble and I knew I had found my sona XDD

@xxthedragonrebornxx

XD Thank you for remembering my boundaries and respecting them! :)) And THANK YOU FOR THE CUPCAKE!! :DDD

I haven't read it, but I've seen it blowing up all over tumblr. It must be pretty cool! :00

@milk-powrit

<XD I won't lie, Bill is a fantastic villain. I just "hate" him because Stanley is my favorite character and Bill put his family through hell 💀

Most of the team: "Aww 🥰💞💞"

Gloria: "WHO ARE YOU AND HOW ARE YOU HOLDING ALL OF US UP AT ONCE"

@pink088

<XD These past 2-3 days have just hammered me health wise, but I can at least say that I've been sleeping enough!

And thanks for the check in! I wish you the best :))

(Pokemon violet comic(?))

:DD Thank you!! I'm glad you liked it!! :)))

If I ever really go into those series I would :00 But I cant remember the Godziilla movies- plus that would be really hard to draw <XDD

There's so many sonic medias that i wouldn't know which one to go by- and I've seen playthroughs of Poppy playtime but it never really grabbed my interest.. <XD

I'll do my best to keep up with all that <XDD Thank you!

(Frank butterfly post)

Oh there's no need to worry about Frank! It might be hard to tell- but that was actually a moth! Frank had bags under his eyes because he was out late studying moths :))

<XD Well considering Homes intentions are intended to be unknown- you're free to imagine that! :D

@skywillow28022

ohmygosh the third movie is so good I actually cant watch it anymore lest I burst into tears 😭😭😭💞💞💞 10/10 WOULD recommend cars 3--

Anyways- I ADORE the cars franchise and absolutely would have drawn them more.. if cars weren't so hard to draw <XD Plus my favorite thing to draw is angsty cuddles and hugs and big droopy eyes and tears- that's kiiiind'a hard to pull off if your characters are cars-

Of course I could always draw them as humans like many other artists have.. but idk, it just doesn't feel the same you know? <XD

Also thank you! I hope you day goes well too! :))

@neo-metalscottic (Welcome home post(?)) (Octonauts eye study) (Oxem and Pepemijo comic)

AAAAA Thank you sop much! :DD I'm glad you've been liking my recent posts!

As for Oxem and Pepemijo, I cant show images because of the stupid 30 images limit-- But Pepemigo is based on/inspired by the Year of the dragon mask, and Oxem is based on the current season of Duets seasonal guide mask! :00

I imagine there are other dragons out there, like that other sky dragon that I made one time-- <XDD I don't really have any ideas for their powers or their story, but I had intended that Pepemijo at least knocked the krill out in self defense. Thankfully they wont be hunted by krill following that event- Oxem got them to a safe place and he knows that he should steer clear of krill territory in the future <XD

And of course! I'd love to see any critters that you've made! :DDD

@sussyhahag

uhg, always disappointing to see.. thank you for letting me know though 😔

*VERY LOUD CARTOON BROKEN HEART SOUND* (I LOVE THISSS)

<XD yup.

Also even though that disclaimer is there for FNAF and Octonauts, I still get people harassing me anyways!.... :')

@vesselofmanythings

AAAA THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! :DDD And I wish you luck on your slime rancher creative adventure!! :}}}

AAA THANK YOU SO MUCH!! :DDDD That means a lot!!! :))

@starsbee

This shouldn't have made me laugh as much as it did XDD

@wolfie-777

Oh no.... THAT MUST BE ME WELCOME HOME AU COMING BACK--

@anikakitty11

Somethin ain't right with that dog <XDD

@edelgeist (Referencing this post)

oooh :00 I wasn't aware of that- thank you for the info! Perhaps I should invest in a cooling pad <XD

I have not <:( But after googling it- I love the artstyle! :DD

[fumifooms]

Honestly I wonder if anyone’s ever read Chilchuck’s “I cheated on her” admission as an implicit reference to prioritizing alcohol over his marriage and feeling guilty abt it.

Ohh… "I cheated on her" as a half-truth because something ended up taking priority over their marriage, because emotionally he was elsewhere… "I cheated on her" because after having all the time in the world to think about it now that he’s alone, he realizes that that might have been how she felt, and that’s how it felt like to him too.

Love that. I def think he’s ironically someone who deflects guilt a lot, in a similar way that he compulsively goes "You’re wrong! I don’t care about you guys at all! I’m an asshole!" he flees emotions by making the problem something else that’s fake, a burden easier to bear, he’s so used to being seen for what he’s not after all. I went into it a bit in one of my fics and in a couple meta posts, but when it comes to his wife he was very much like an ostrich with his head in the sand, seeing her fall into a bad mood on the outing before she left him but dismissing it as something "sudden" that’s not worth thinking deeper about. Overdrinking is a problem for future Chil. I think he did a lot of "You want me to drink less and you’re afraid for my health? Get over it lol" and "I should be less strict with the girls and raise my voice less? My father was a strict drunk and look at me, I turned out functional and great! The girls are literally fine and love me" and "Oh? My drinking is affecting our family? No it’s not smh smh get off my back"< Drunk a significant portion of the time he spends at home since he’s off-work and somewhere he can relax. Type of guy to always dismiss any issues that might exists because he prefers ignoring them as if they’ll go away. All his problem solving energy is spent during work and the issue is with his family he already likes things as they are, they’re his comfort zone and change is scary, he doesn’t want the change, even if it’d be better. He doesn’t want to change, his unhealthy habits are guilty pleasures he wishes people didn’t try to make him feel guilty for

BUT POINT IS he struggles with guilt and like. Letting it be a feeling that he gets sometimes, so it’s all bottled up and festers and gets twisted into frustration or such like how his worry usually does. I like this take, wether it’s something he’s already thought a lot about or it’s something he’s repressed that came suddenly pouring out of him like blood out of a wound, now that he’s putting it into words with someone for maybe the first time.

It’s interesting how he didn’t refuse going up to the bicorn, I’m sure part of him wanted to see if it would like him, like the virtue test it is. Would a monster that loves despicable men be magnetized to him? Would it confirm his fears?

[deramin2]

Absolutely love that Marisha was probably going to make a tamer choice, but Matt saw the perfect opportunity to push her as a Delilah, and really feed Laudna's paranoia. I think that really pushed her over the edge and Marisha fully ran with it.

And Liam really thought through what he knew (this was Laudna and she's being manipulated by Delilah but not intentionally hurting Orym), vs. what Orym knew (something he couldn't see attacked him in his sleep and he needs to defend himself from it because he had no idea what it's intentions were and has every reason to assume it's trying to kill all of them). Honestly Orym remained pretty defensive overall. Love that they both learned into how much both of them felt totally justified and like they were defending the party from harmful corrupting influence.

———

I'm someone with mental health problems that cause intrusive thoughts that can make me feel so absolutely certain that I'm justified in viewing other people as being intentionally harmful and lash out at them. In the moment it feels completely justified and righteous and a truth other people need to hear even though they'll resist it. I try really, really hard to resist expressing those thoughts. I try to remind myself I will end up regretting it and pushing people away permanently who (justifiably) won't put up with that treatment.

But sometimes it's so strong or I'm so triggered by the awfulness around me and despair that it escapes me. It feels like everyone else is lying to justify evil and I'm sick of it. Consequences be damned. It feels protective of other vulnerable people. And then I lash out and say things I regret and get yelled and blocked or dropped or otherwise lose people in my life and get more and more isolated. And feel like they're totally justified because really it's me who's the evil monster and need to be isolated for other prep people's protection because I can't be trusted and can't be better. I don't even want anyone too comfort me or love me because they don't deserve to be hurt by me eventually. (I'm not saying that's actually true, but that's how I feel and it feels very real to me while it's happening.)

———

Marisha absolutely nailed that depiction. In an ongoing way but particularly in CR C3 E95. And I love that it came right off the joyous mania of the shopping spree for and crafting season where they were all bonding and making plans for the future and letting off steam. But then she was triggered and all of that didn't matter. Off anything the strength of those emotions was a pendulum whose momentum helped her distress swing harder in the other direction.

She was triggered, and Delilah was a second layer of intrusive thoughts that made her feel so sure of her feelings and actions. 100% justified as Marisha said. And she would have been totally justified in just waking Orym up and having a conversation about the sword and at least putting it in the Bag of Holding overnight until they could make a long term decision. I think that's what Marisha was planning to do until Delilah showed up. She wasn't justified in hurting Orym in a unilateral decision that she should feed the sword to Delilah. Her thoughts were very real to get but not based on facts. Whatever her intentions she hurt Orym and avoided apologizing.

And I loved how Imogen pushed back this time. So often she's enabled Laudna because she loves her wants to comfort her. But this time I think she saw that's not what Laudna needs. She needs someone to check her and keep her from escalating. She's feeling complicated feelings right now because she loves Laudna, but she hates Delilah and what Delilah is getting Laudna to do. Like the partner of an addict who loves them, but hates what the substance is doing to them and how they're acting to feed that addiction. I can't wait to see how that plays out in the future.

The whole thing was incredibly real representation to me. This is an incredibly triggering situation that they're all in and they're all crumbling in the face of it. Chetney and Orym both made deals with Nana Mori. Chetney for fame, Orym for power. Ashton secretly took the fire primordial shard and nearly killed themselves in front of Fearne and then the other others. Imogen tried to flip her mom on the cult that's indoctrinated her for decades. FCG did blow himself up. Fearne was lured away by her shitbag sperm donor in the night so he could try to kill her and have a copy take her place. Dorian watched Lolth's crown take over Opal, his brother die, and his friends scattered. Laudna is feeding Delilah's power. None of them are okay and they're all being totally reckless. They're both bonding over their recklessness and being pushed apart by it. Can't wait to see what happens next.

[the-hawthorns-ocs]

Soothsayer Spindle'stare

MY ABSOLUTE FAVE OC EVER! MY SKRUNKLY!!!!

Character Bio:

Kinship: The Hawthorns

Queer (loves wife <3); what's a gender? (agender); it/she

Age: 3 cycles, 11 moons; ~31 Hyrs

Voice Headcanon: Entrapta - She-Ra - And The Princesses of Power (but like if she smoked a pack-o-sigs a day???)

Title meaning: -stare = uhh stares, like a lot, its weird, does it blink???; Soothsayer specific -> this cat can see into your soul and across the vail of death and see what your future holds

Role: Soothsayer

Mother: River'riddle

Father: Monarch Bat'flight

Siblings: Monarch Light'fall

Mate: Worm'soil

Other notable kin: Heir Night (nephew)

Extra Notes: her name was originally Garlicnose but after a series of polls I have decided on Spindle'stare as it's new name! Hooray!

Character Summary:

this ones long bec she's my blorbo, sorry not sorry :P

Soothsayers are born absolute weirdos, that's actually how a Kinship can tell that a cat is probably a Soothsayer. They are all not entirely there, because they walk the line between the living and the dead, this gives them the gift of foresight into the future and the ability to commune with the dead, but it also makes them distant, odd, they act like their minds are often in a whole other plane from regular cats.

In Spindle'stare's case, its just really kooky, an absolute creature. Though she is also very traumatized, which is kinda a given for Soothsayers... but it's even worse for her. As a kit her connection to the Stars was almost entirely cut off, and was instead taken over by the Dark Maw... The Maw wanted control over the Hawthorns, and becoming their future Soothsayer's spiritual source was one of the best ways to do this.

Deep deep down I think that Spindle knows there is something off about her spiritual connection, but she doesn't really process this at all. She pretty much believes that she has a normal connection and is totally talking to the Stars and not the Dark Maw. Sometimes she gets a random breakthrough connection to the Stars and is bombarded by so many messages and warnings from the ancestors she is pretty much unable to process it and just becomes even more confused and overwhelmed, acting even more strange than normal.

As a result of the Dark Maw's hold on Spindle, the Soothsayer has not been able to aid the kinship in ways it should be able to. During Spindle's training and apprenticeship the Kinship went through a horrible illness that killed many many cats, everyone questioned why Spindle was unable to receive prophecies foretelling these deaths, or guiding them to a cure... Spindle was simply helpless and useless in a time what the kinship needed a spiritual guide the most... This event has left the Kinship not all too trusting of Spindle's guidance, and has left Spindle lost and confused as to why the Stars do not with to help her.

Though Spindle seems like an old kooky lady she is actually only around 4 cycles old aka. in her early 30s in human years. Spindle was littermates with Monarch Light'fall, they were extremally close, and Light was often the only one who could keep her stable, in the present, and more herself. Spindle was devastated at Light'fall's death and she fell deeper into the spiritual plane as a result, only Spinde'stare's mate Worm'soil is able to bring Spindle into clarity these days, and it is far more difficult to do so.

Spindle spends much of it's time with her mate Worm'soil, they are one of the few cats who are not creeped out by her, they understand her and love it deeply despite it's strangeness. They were childhood friends, and grew even closer during the era of illness in their youth... both of them bonded over the extreme pressure on them at the time, Spindle with the expectation of life saving prophecies and omens, and Worm with the health of the Kinship as a Healer apprentice.

The two of them are now two fucked up middle aged women(ish) who are just trying to survive their high stress roles in their very problematic kinship... They can often be found hanging out on their lonesome together, with Spindle buried in Worm's fluff <3

[starsinkpop]

ATEEZ Kim Hongjoong Tarot Reading - Personality

Disclaimer: I do tarot readings for fun, so please read them with a grain of salt. Don’t take my words too seriously and just keep an open mind. Tarot is a divination tool that can’t predict the future, as every single individual has their own will and makes their own decisions. Tarot is not a fixed fate. It should be seen as a guidance and a good friend that just has your best interest and gives you advice when needed. I’m not putting anyone in my readings on a pedestal nor am I trying to harm anyone. One last side note, I’m not a native speaker, so please excuse any wrong spellings or poor grammar.

Date of reading: June 30th 2024

Decks: Edgar Allen Poe Tarot, Wild Mystic Oracle

is often confused about his own emotions

this makes him quite insecure and he could be dependent on others opinions

he’s very stubborn

but this comes from a place of self protection

at times he could lose control

has his head everywhere and nowhere

like he’s having so many projects (in his career but also privately) running at the same time and wants to give his 100% in every single one but that’s just impossible

he regularly has some quite dark and negative thoughts

those thoughts are creating extra obstacles in his life

he’s very nurturing and takes good care of his loved ones

finds beauty in things and people society would usually reject

he’s incredibly creative (obviously lol)

i also see him being very romantic and soft

doesn’t shy away from change and growth

i’m getting crazy mood swings

one second he’s stuck in a negative spiral and the next second he’s a happy little sunshine

he’s unpredictable in a way

is easily bored

focuses on building wealth and security for himself but also his loved ones

he’s sometimes restraining himself from a fun time because of that, work comes first

he’s very hard working but ignores his mental health at times

he’s often exhausted and stressed, which again, could end up in him losing his temper when triggered

has a hard time finding a good work life balance

but he loves to ignore that, literally blind for his own wellbeing and he could therefore burnout himself pretty easily

he often feels like his dreams are out of reach

he almost seems shameful to think too much about his dreams

it’s coming from a place of false hope and doubt

got his heart broken very often and could have a hard time opening up to new people, especially if there’s a romantic interest

he has a hard time showing his true emotions

he feels like he has to be a strong person at all times, even when he sometimes feels very deeply broken

is very protective over his loved ones but often wishes someone would protect him this much so he could rest his mind and let his guard down

when people cross his boundaries he can get aggressive

he sometimes feels lost and lacks direction in his life

he wants to embrace his softer side more often but feels like society won’t allow him to

he easily feels discouraged and could find it hard to find joy and happiness

he’s a loyal and reliable friend and lover

but could deal with jealousy

hope you enjoyed!

love, nicky 🫧

masterlist

[indigosabyss]

Part 2 of my DCST Time Travel Snippets

"Lemme get this straight. To stop this impending doom, you want us to build a spaceship that will take a small crew just past the Moon. Where they will then negotiate with parasitic alien robots and convince them that humanity is stupid and not worth being frozen into stone." Markus, one of the oldest scientists at NASA, surmised. He sounded incredibly tired.

Everything the people from the future told them was tiring.

"Pretty much." Dr Xeno from the future said, "It's a big ask, I realize. And a lot of lives depend on it."

"Who would we trust with such a mission, though?" Another NASA scientist asked, "There's a lot of factors to take into account. Personality, and training, and there's not enough time to conduct proper astronaut qualification exams for the wider public."

"Good point." Dr Xeno allowed.

"Ah, how about you get your version of the Five Wise Generals to go?" Brody, the future's top mechanic laughed, "They'll all be little babies now, so we'll knock off a couple hundred kilograms from the weight limit."

"I don't think we can have infants piloting a rocket and saving humanity." One of their current day scientists sighed. It was weird to think that a group of people called the Five Wise Generals were currently babies.

"No, no, you misunderstand. They should be fifteen at the youngest. Twenty four at the oldest." Xeno clarified, "And one of them won't exist until thirty seven hundred years, so right now, it's more like the Four Wise Generals. But I agree with Dr. Brody, except for my Stan, there's no one I'd recommend more. Byakuya Ishigami's an option, but I also don't trust him enough to not launch into a passionate speech about all the good humanity has done."

Byakuya Ishigami. He was a newbie astronaut, just inducted into the program. Normally, such love for humankind was admirable but...

"Brief us on these Generals." He decided. Just to have that option.

----

First was Senku Ishigami, the man who had made the first phonecall to the past. The son of Byakuya Ishigami. So far, they had avoided looking up the kid in the modern world.

Currently, he was fifteen years old, and a high school student. With a criminal record of setting off bombs in public parks.

"Oh, yeah. He likes making rockets." Xeno from current day confirmed blandly, "I had no idea he was setting them off in parks."

He was definitely lying.

"But you'll let me go to space without me having to build my own rocket, right?" A high-pitched voice asked. A boy with the wildest hair was suddenly standing in the control room.

"How'd you get in here?!"

"Xeno and my dad kept me updated on the situation here." He picked at his ear, "I couldn't care a millimeter less about the situation here now that we've figured out the secret behind the stone swallows. I just want to go to space. As soon as possible."

He vibrated slightly as he spoke, clearly excited, but hiding it well.

---

Second on the list, Asagiri Gen.

Nineteen years old, and a... moderately famous stage magician.

"Doesn't look like he has the muscle for a space trip."

"What good's a mentalist? We can drill anyone into saying things."

And so, Asagiri Gen was overlooked.

Somewhere in the world, a magician with two-toned hair was very offended.

---

Next was Ryusui Nanami, one of the Nanami Conglomerate's CEO's brood. A bit of a disgraced one, because of a dramatic love affair, but given the same allowance that any of the others got.

At 20 years of age, he had the biggest and most diverse collection of sailboats in the world. The kid was a dedicated adventurer, with all the health that came from it.

They could use that.

"Ryusui Nanami." An escort of suited officials approached him on a beach.

He looked up over the frame of his sunglasses, taking them in. He grinned, "Aw, man, they're really going to assassinate me this time, huh?"

"No, we're from NASA. How would you like to visit the final frontier?"

He snapped his fingers, laughing, "Name your price!"

-----

And lastly...

"Saionji Ukyo, you've been transferred last minute."

"Eh???" He looked at his CO in confusion.

"It's a matter of international security."

Did they think he'd overheard something? Oh God, he'd known his crazy hearing would get him killed one day.

"You'll be working with an American strike team. Full debriefing back at the base. For now, prepare yourself to meet Commander Stanley Snyder."

What was going on???

[put together an avengers intiative recruitment scene lol. i love gen i swear, they just dont understand him yettt TTATT]

[azure-cherie]

PAC : Messages from Aset

Hello loves , first of all a very big thank you to Aset for helping me in conveying through my divination, this reading contains general messages so take what resonates and leave the rest , i used tarot cards , intuition and runes for this reading , likes , reblogs and feedbacks are very very appreciated , thank you for letting me read you :)

Pile 1 -3

Pile 1:

My dear pile 1 , Aset wants to convey that she is proud that you have achieved a lot of abundance in your life but you are focused to earn more when in reality you should be happy in what you already have and you should also share with others what you have made since kindness is the greatest of virtues that will help you to achieve great heights, be cautious when you serve others , help them but don't help them to the point of exploitation , when you need ask for help and always help will be provided when you are in search of a financial need . You are someone who has come a long way without any support you have been worried and fought all the odds to come to this point and she is very proud of you for doing all this but remember that a small thing can destroy a lot of things so when in times of haste take time to sit down shut the world and reflect, I think you have a habit of getting to angry at the wrong people and this is going to create a problem in the wrong runs so you are advised to work on it and stay away from people at that time so that you don't end up in problems and learn to be more grateful about your surroundings and whatever has been provided to you or else it could go away you , you're going to enter a very abundant period in your life in terms of emotional needs You are going to create new horizons and new plans for yourself marriage business deals and child birth news can be heard for you your ancestors are rooting for you , I see symbolism of marigold flowers you can do some water magic or worship with water as an element that will help you in getting clarity about yourself .

Runes :

Berkanan

Beware of incorrect choices, take time to contemplate, some family functions maybe cancelled due to health issues take care of your health , you might experience stagnation , heal your relationship with your mother , get yourself a visit to the gynaecologist, you might experience some menstrual issues , watch your expenditure.

Hagalaz

Change has to occur , some things are destroyed so new things can be built, unexpected meetings and realisations, destruction now will end up making something good for the future keep hoping, you could have a breakup, moving houses , someone fake in your friend circle will be unmasked.

Pile 2 :

My dear pile 2 , she really wants you to take a stand for yourself , my dear file 2 you have been relying on the guidance of a person for too long and at this point you have almost become dependent on that person but she suggests you to go for a soul searching and finding what you really like to do because the end of the day you should grow old fulfilling your passions and desires , you are already abundant and blessed because of your family hierarchy and how rich have you been You should explore forest and small places for learning about life it feels as if you have grown old but your wisdom needs to be increased, You should pay attention to your hair as it holds wisdom and ancestor knowledge right now You may have dreams crazy dreams take notes of them somebody is trying to communicate to you , your future is in your hands You don't have much time there is a big change coming in for you with the onset of the new change . There could be an extra marital Affair that could change the course of your life beware and make sure you have enough resources to make out of it I see the symbolism of red and white candles you can use them and ask your guides so that they can provide you a clear part of what you can do ahead but they can only help you when you ask for help yourself . Take the stand for yourself to do whatever you are interested in.

Runes :

Dagaz

You're are in the path of self discovery and awakening, re evaluation, talk to your children or the children in your neighborhood, invest in family planning, keep hustling it will be worth it , evolution in relationship, take your medicines regularly.get an eye checkup .

Eiwaz

You could be entering or interested in shamanism , you're going through an awakening, you may think something has ended but it's yet to be fulfilled, you could work with chaos magick , there could be some delays but don't worry about it , it will work out , are some of you consuming weed , there's a union in the spiritual plane .

Pile 3 :

Dear pile 3 , Aset wants to convey that you should be looking after things you choose to nurture , maybe you brought a plant or a pet but you are not paying attention to it she wants you to take into account your responsibilities maybe it could be about the older members in the family, you will be going out on a trip soon and you should take care of yourself physically as well as spiritually I see the vision of an amulet that will be protecting you You should search signs for protection or make a sigil for yourself that will help you for sure , all that you have dreaming will come true, but remember to put efforts for it as nothing comes without trying you are blessed in every field , you will be meeting a new partner soon that will help you realise your potential remember to not sabotage the relationship because you are not healed, try to focus on making yourself stable and creating a balance that will be very essential for you ,work on your sacral chakra , don't dwell on the past the future is brighter than you can imagine , go somewhere near a pond and feel the healing energy, in the next 3 months we will be undergoing a lot of changes and a lot of things that you like but are not good for you will go away from you but remember to know that there is always something that serves in exchange of something that doesn't serve , if there's a group project coming your way then remember to include everyone and not take too much on yourself you are divinely protected.

Runes :

Ingwaz

protect your home , work on your masculine energy, make necessary sacrifices, new births , changes , expansion, process of manifestation, look after your well being and health, reorganization.

Dagaz (came up in pile 2 as well you can check it if you want )

You're are in the path of self discovery and awakening, re evaluation, talk to your children or the children in your neighborhood, invest in family planning, keep hustling it will be worth it , evolution in relationship, take your medicines regularly.get an eye checkup .

That's all , thank you so much for reading i hope it resonates and helps you 🤍

[lilyvalerieorchard]

As much as I hate Lily Orchard, white favoritism is a thing in pretty much every fandom. One example I can think off the top of my head in the toh fandom, was back when Thanks to Them aired, and many people mocked Luz's scene in the classroom (despite being literally a display of suicidal ideation) while writing thinkpieces about Hunter's mental health and abuse, basically ignoring the Black main character's mental health issues to focus on the white boy (hopefully this doesn't come off as me hating Hunter, I like him a lot, it's just an example)

Speaking of season 3, there was quite a group of people who hated on Luz due to her mental health issues, calling her selfish and ungrateful while she was struggling with self-destructive behavior while, once again, Hunter didn't get as much backlash for his ""selfish"" behavior in For the Future, as people mostly understood he was struggling with his mental health and grief. It's a sadly common thing in fandoms to narrow Black characters down as one dimensional and "bad", while white characters get a pass and sympathy from fans

Another example of racism in the fandom, is whitewashed art of Black and brown-skinned characters, mainly Luz, and how many artists don't take this topic seriously - that was more common in the early fandom, though, thankfully becoming less frequent as time went one

There's some other examples: in 2021, there was a Skara/Edric comic that spiraled huge controversy on Twitter due to Odalia objectifying Skara and referring to her as an "it", which has very clear racist undertones. Also, art on Twitter of Luz saying she's gonna "ruin" Amity's bloodline by joining her family, also having clear racist undertones (There's likely more, but these two are the first ones to come to my mind, as they received tons of deserved backlash)

So yeah, once again, I dislike Lily Orchard, but denying racism in the fandom is just... wrong. It may be a minority of fans, especially nowadays, but it's there and it harms people of color in the fandom, who tend to get mass harassment for calling it out. I also hope this doesn't come off as rude, the post just brought back some memories of my personal experiences in the fandom, and I thought I should share

Oh my...I never knew it was that bad. The large majority of the fandom loves Luz but to hear some truly nasty people treat her and the other BIPOC characters like this is just wrong. Speaking as comic and video game fan: I know how most of the Batfam fandom will erase Cass, Duke and Steph all while propping up white/white-passing male characters like Dick, Jason, Tim and Damian (nothing against either of them); how Marvel comic fans will downplay characters like Kamala and Miles or slut-shame MJ; how lead female characters of color in games like Forspoken, Dustborn and Mirror's Edge are lambasted as "too angry", "too vulgar", "too snarky", "too unlikeable" by gamers AND critics alike while angsty white male leads in certain popular games are given free passes. I feel you, There is rampant cishet white male favouritism in ALL of nerd culture and I absolutely hate it. For the record, I have nothing against cishet white male characters in general, I just cannot stand double standards that force female and minority characters to jump through multiple flaming hoops to prove their "authenticity". I looked up the whitewashing "fanart" people were drawing of Luz, Gus, Willow, and-

Disgusting.

*To those so-called "fans"*

If you think Luz, Guz, Willow, Darius, Camilia and others would be better if they were white, if you so happen to be inbred, racist piece of crap.

Get the Hell out and NEVER set foot in this fandom (or any fandoms) EVER AGAIN. Dana didn't create a beautiful whimsical masterwork of animation just so you could hijack it for portraying your own twisted Hapsburg utopia. In fact, she hates everything filth like you stand for. So once again, get out and get drenched by acid rain.

*sighs* That felt good.

Just remember: Plasma Lily stands with marginalized voices.

[iknowimdespicableme]

My top 5 Doctor Who Episodes; And why!

DOCTOR WHO SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT!! I say the season and episode before I start analyzing, so feel free to skip some.

5. Vincent and the Doctor [5x10]

This episode was so touching to me on many different levels. Firstly, as a creative person who deals with mental health and ostracization, seeing a version of Vincent Van Gogh on screen felt almost healing. Acknowledging the hurt he experienced while not ignoring his joys was very special. On a technical level, the way that the episode visualized a way Vincent Van Gogh may have seen the world was incredibly eye opening and better allowed me to appreciate his art. Furthermore, the confusion Amy experienced during the episode regarding her memory was such an experience for two reasons; Firstly, it proved to us, the audience, how much she has grown to love Rory. Before, she was dating him because he was the only half-decent guy around. But, after learning more about him and spending more time with him, she is truly in love with him and this episode gives proof of that. Secondly, I experience dissociative fugue, wherein I may forget large aspects of my life, and this episode was so comforting regarding that experience. Yes, sometimes there are things you can't remember that make you happy or sad. You should embrace the feelings rather than ignore them or feel scared. And, finally, the moment where Vincent Van Gogh is able to see what the future of his art holds is a touching moment; and I like that it didn't save him in the end. Like the Doctor said, “The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things. The good things don't always soften the bad things, but vice versa, the bad things don't always spoil the good things or make them unimportant.”

4. The Husbands of River Song [2015 Christmas Special]

I looked forward to finally watching this episode for so long leading up to it because I had heard such flattering things about it; and it didn't disappoint. After many episodes that felt lacking or one dimensional, this special brought back an element of camp, humor, and fun that had been missing, all the while including beloved characters and dramatic sequences. Allowing the Doctor an opportunity to see how one of his companions, especially River, acts when he is not around gives the audience so much more insight into her character and the Doctor a chance to learn and grow. Asking her about himself and learning that, although she may be worried or grieving, she finds these feelings worth it just to keep loving him. Considering how much River puts a mask on around 11 to not show her age and sadden him, it was refreshing to see a new side of her. Not to mention, the storyline for the special was interesting and compelling without being overwhelming in a way that took away from the characters. Although it's unlikely that the Doctor doubted River's feelings for him, this episode gave ultimate proof regarding how much she cares about him. Unfortunately, it also showcases how little River thinks of herself in relation to the Doctor. And, yet, there 12 is to prove her wrong when it mattered. Best of both worlds! Finally, the tenderness mixed with grief and understanding that we end the special with is such a perfect conclusion to River's story with the Doctor as it reflects their whole saga together perfectly. River's argument to the Doctor that, "Happily ever after doesn't mean forever, it just means time." was so special and the Doctor finally allowing himself to settle down (if only for a little bit) was exactly the kind of growth the character needed.

3. Wild Blue Yonder [2nd 2023 David Tennent Special]

I watched this episode yesterday and by gods it quickly skyrocketed to one of my favorites, where do I even start. Within the first few minutes of the episode, we are given many similarities and differences when comparing this Doctor and Donna adventure to their previous excursions. While they still compliment each other well, offering understanding and push-back, it is also clear the ways they have matured. Donna seems more in touch with her emotions and how she is truly feeling. When we first met her, she had a lot of anger and frustration within her from constantly being scrutinized and ignored. Now, we can see she is more peaceful and secure, even if below the surface some hesitation still lingers. Whereas, in the Doctor's case, he is so much more open to affection and vulnerability. The lessons he learned as 11 and 13 showed him that he could trust others, even if it is slowly. Although he is still trying to ignore or repress many things that have happened to him, he is at peace with them more than he was as 10. They both are less rageful. So, from a literary standpoint, just the beginning of this episode was wonderful. The classic "TARDIS fucks off somewhere leaving the company stranded" and "Doctor loses his sonic screwdriver and doesn't know what to do with himself for a bit" tropes came back swinging, and the way it affected the duo was wonderful to watch. The reality of the situation wasn't quickly swept under the rug or ignored because of a bigger problem, they got to sit in their fear for a while which was beautiful. The slow realization throughout the episode as if the audience is figuring out the answer at the same time as the Doctor just felt satisfying. Small, seemingly disconnected things coming together to form a compelling mystery. And, because it takes so long to give us the answer, we feel the carnal fear of the unknown just like the Doctor and Donna. I was tense when I realized they weren't talking to each other, but copies. I was scared when they were separated. And, the best part of the whole fucking episode, I didn't know who was who. That was terrifying! Up until the last second, I thought the Doctor had made the right choice, too! It kept me on the edge of my seat, informed me so much about the characters, explored a terrifying "what if" in a way only sci-fi can replicate, and was silly as hell. Loved every second. Also, the little robot guy was cute as hell.

2. Heaven Sent [9x11]

Explodes everywhere I love 12. This Doctor is characterized as a less nice, but still very kind regeneration. He holds so many conflicting feelings regarding the loss of the Ponds, his changing relationship with Clara, his perception of himself. I loved how he acted in his episodes. as socially confused, because it felt very familiar to me. The way his brain always seemed too loud and his loner energy was such a switch-up compared to 11. and yet so in character all the same. This episode carried this perfect essence of Doctor Who that felt lost in the majority of the last couple seasons. An entire episode where the Doctor is alone, and grieving, and loving, and problem-solving all at the same time was so compelling. Although it is clear I am more of a fan of episodes that focus on the characters and not the current storyline, this story was enthralling even if it took away from character moments sometimes. Do I wish we had more chances at the beginning/middle of the episode to properly address or reminisce about Clara? Yes. But, after watching the whole episode, it is clear why it was done. The setting for Heaven Sent was so intriguing, and the whole episode we are just wondering as much as the Doctor is; Why? Why is he being chased, why was he brought here, why are there shovels? It reeled us in. And then, once we realize the torture he is putting himself through, the dramatics, character information, and emotion we are given is so heart-wrenching. Evidently, Clara gave the Doctor a comfort greater and worth more than 5 billion years of torture. Could you imagine that? The depth of his love for Clara is given so much of a spotlight in this episode, and I am frothing at the mouth for it. Especially considering how they may frustrate or hurt each other, they still know each other. They help each other. And goddammit, he is not going to let her go. But, this stubbornness isn't necessarily a good thing. One important thing about loving someone is knowing when to let them go. This love for Clara was selfish the same way her love was for him in these intense moments where they sacrifice themselves for each other. They were doing it to prove something to themselves, to get the other back because they couldn't accept they were gone, not because it would be a better existence for the one in danger. Clara didn't want to be saved, she was being brave. And this imperfect grief the Doctor experiences was so achingly realistic. When I lost my cousin, it was so hard to accept. I wanted to ignore it, I wanted to be angry, I wanted him back. But, in the end, it was his time. This journey the Doctor goes on regarding yet another loss felt so powerful. He was forced to feel this and it hurt, he couldn't just try and quickly forget about it or sulk on his own terms. At the same time, the revelations he comes to throughout the episode were so reassuring to hear someone outside of my own head say. "It’s funny. The day you lose someone isn’t the worst. At least you’ve got something to do. It’s all the days they stay dead."

Turn Left [4x11]

This comes as a surprise to no one as someone who has been PREACHING character > story. This episode, while being a perfect set up for the finale, tells us so fucking much about the Doctor and, more importantly, ABOUT DONNA! Without Donna, there's no Doctor. Without the Doctor, everything goes to shit! Seeing as we, the audience, are usually seeing the universe by following the Doctor, a companion-focused episode was so refreshing. We got to learn so much about who Donna is, what her life back home was like before we met her, and gave realistic consequences to her actions. FUCK YEAH! It felt grounded, it felt interesting. I also adore the theory that every action we take splits us off into a new universe or timeline, so this episode was so perfect for me. DONNA'S INTERACTIONS WITH ROSE!!! Their comradery and understanding, the way Rose takes Donna under her wing, a moment where we see them as real people without the Doctor intervening or affecting the discussion. The importance of Donna to the universe being made so clear. WILF'S FLASHBACKS!! It's been forever since I saw this episode, but it is so rewatchable and makes me so interested every. single. time. The end of the episode is bone-chilling, with her literally killing herself to save the universe. And then!! The Doctor being out of the loop for once and understanding the severity of the situation with the return of the Bad Wolf. Explodes everywhere, words do not do justice the pure love, respect, and admiration I have for this episode and every actor, producer, tech person, writer, involved. Thank you GODS for this episode, I love you turn left. This lesson that every single person is indispensable and important sets up that conversation in later seasons and eventually becomes the main reoccurring theme of the show. Every Donna Noble, Rose Tyler, and Martha Jones of the universe is important and loved and unique and dbiubibjbjbgiufgbfgu you get me?

Honorable mentions:

The Parting of Ways [1x13]

The first finale of new who, and it was so gooooood!! Tied up the Bad Wolf hints, gave interesting endings to the TARDIS crew, told us so much about the ninth doctor, gave us confirmed ninerose, had a compelling storyline behind it, and just a classic good episode to go back to.

Tooth and Claw [2x2]

I know I've been mostly talking about the character implications of my favorite episodes, but this one was just interesting and fun. I loved the dynamic between the Doctor and Rose, the adventure, the silliness, the royal family being involved. Just a good, well-paced, wonderful episode.

The God Complex [6x11]

This episode was so yummy. While I was watching 11's seasons, I did get the vibe that Amy looked up and admired the Doctor in an unhealthy way and I loved how this episode addressed this. The idea that this thing was taking the forms of people's worst fears, the mystery of what the Doctor saw, the interesting characters, the understanding on what a God Complex actually was, its wonderful!!

The Timeless Children [12x10]

This may be controversial and I don't care!! I loved the way this episode was structured. I was confused and interested the whole time and when it fell into place I actually had to pause and pace around because OH MY GODS!!! it was a well-done reveal that had such interesting implications and I believe every reaction was in character and made sense. At first, I was upset about the loss of the former perception of the Doctor; Just a regular ol' guy who decided to act out and, above all, be kind. Suddenly, she was from another universe and was the original timelord and i was a little sad. But, the way it has been handled after feels so fitting, and it puts the rest of the show into perspective. All of the confusing things that set the Doctor apart from the others, it made sense now! I loved this episode, I thought it was a great.

The Village of the Angels [13x4]

I LOVED THE FLUX!! getting to have a old-school style season wherein the who season was just one problem was so cool and allowed for so much information! This episode specifically was so compelling. I loved the Professor Jericho; was SUCH a great addition to the TARDIS crew, and the way the handled the angels was arguably better than Time of Angels + Flesh and Stone. They were terrifying, the mystery was intriguing, and the characters were interesting!!! The only difficult part of this episode was keeping track of who was who as someone who has difficulty recognizing faces. Besides that, I fucking loved The Village of the Angels.

[piss-stained-jorts]

RIGHT

-claps hands-

some of you are new to this despair. it ain't fun. as someone who is no stranger to hopelessness, despair, fatalism, misanthropy, and an undying bitterness, I'll give it a go trying to offer some semblance of help. my soul has been a strange kind of melancholy for over 15 years. I experience a few seconds of true happiness once every few months. and yet, here I stand. I think it'd be better if the whole world burned, but I ain't holding a match. point is, it's entirely possible to keep going, even in this state.

even in saying this, I have my doubts it'll do anything positive at all. I'm doing it anyway. I do it with the same defeatism I experience when I go to vote in a deep South red state. a single drop of blue dye in a sea of red blood. I know, objectively, that nothing will come of my actions. I do it anyway. for selfish reasons, I do it anyway.

I'm not here to help you out of it. I'm gonna offer some advice on living on inside it. I don't know how to get out of it yet, either. I'm working on that. again, maybe it helps, maybe it does nothing. here we go.

I recommend booking a therapy appointment. this is my biggest, most helpful advice TBH. I didn't go for a long time. didn't think i could afford it. turns out, there's secret little things in the world to help you afford it. me, I went to healthcare.gov, found some cheap ass insurance, and now I'm in therapy for severe mental health issues. I'm getting a second therapist, too. there's some deeeeep rooted shit in me. there's very likely deep rooted shit in you, too, and it's a great time to find someone who can help dig it out. ain't a cure all, and you'll have to see it as a conversation instead of someone coming and fixing you. they aren't a knight in shining armor with all the answers, but two heads are better than one.

I also recommend poetry. not just reading it, but writing it. the angrier and sadder the better. every raw, honest feeling. do not judge whatever comes out. don't worry about structure. don't worry about making it readable. make vent art, too.

I recommend familiar, comforting foods. things that remind you of those pockets in time when you were warm and safe. old foods, old games, old imaginary friends. yes, the imaginary friend thing extends to grown ups. a positive voice that is only ever kind and loving to you, no matter what. it's your own voice echoed back, after all.

I recommend caring about people. it helps to keep you in this world if you have someone else in it you love so, so fucking much.

I recommend bitching. bitch about your feelings and the world and the state of things with someone who also wants to bitch.

I recommend sad, angry, bitter, hopeless songs, under the caveat that it won't make you want to kill yourself. if listening to sad music makes you wanna die more, do not do this. me, I find songs about dying and being miserable comforting because I feel seen and understood in a way I feel I have been failed. maybe that's not how your brain works, though. just be safe and don't die.

under no circumstances kill yourself. you don't want to die. your brain is coping and trying to take back a sense of control when you feel powerless, and that's the solution it can think of because it's straightforward. do not do this.

if a sense of hope does come, don't push it away. if it leaves quickly, breathe and enjoy the few seconds you have with it. don't berate yourself if you don't feel the way you "should." there is no should or should not with emotions or the lack of them.

I recommend finding something to do, or something to put off. me, I keep saying I'll write a book, make a game, do all sorts of things. maybe I will, maybe I won't. it's something to do or say I'll do in the future. a sense of purpose. even if I never do it, it's still there.

learn to see the worth in both the retching pain and the numbness. when I am overcome with despair and anguish, I find the worth in that I'm still able to care that much, that I have a consistent muse for my work, and that crying is cathartic. when I'm numb, I find worth in the cool, calm gray color that mutes my existence, and the lack of pain makes the boredom a welcome respite. it still blows, and I'd trade it for joy and hope any day of the week, but the joy machine doesn't work anymore. working on that one.

listen. listen. I don't know what the fuck the future holds. pithy statements of hope don't help me, so I won't give them to you. be there for your friends, be there for yourself, give space to your feelings. I know. I know these new feelings are scary. you've never felt them like this before. you're new to this, I know you are. I promise you, you can keep living. I promise you, it's possible to find little joys, even here in the nightmare. I know the feeling of drowning in the ocean with hardly a sail to keep you is scary. I know from lived experience that it's possible for it to become bearable. I still believe, though I'm not there yet, that it's possible to leave this dark forest. I am bitter and resentful and I feel cheated and I don't think feeling any of this makes anyone a bad person.

it hurts so much, I know. I know it hurts. I know words can't make it all better. this world we live in is not what it should be. you are so cherished.