#i love the world. i love people. you motherfuckers are killing everything and im not stopping you and you're getting in the way of me loving

[skrunksthatwunk]

not to doomer post. but. american politics is like here's a conservative warmonger who wants to burn you alive personally and here's a different conservative warmonger who definitely wouldn't stop someone from burning you alive BUT who might raise the minimum wage by $0.30/hour for you, but only like eight years from now (so re-elect me please!! >w<). yes one of them has to be president they are the only two options we'll let you have. no neither of them will stop the government from killing you or anyone else, but at least one will say "it's kind of bad to kill people :( someone should really do something about that..." while giving the people-killers $20,000,000,000,000 to keep doing it then saying they can't afford to help you at all, but oh shucks, maybe next cycle, if you vote for me again! and also everyone will pretend as though they are extremely different political entities covering two highly polarized ends of the political spectrum despite nearly identical policy views obscured by their slightly different ways of addressing their target audiences, many of whom are also conservative warmongers. and also if you don't vote or vote third party the other guy will win and you will watch as they burn everyone you love alive in the same way they've burned so many strangers so you kind of feel like you have to vote for the other warmonger because even though they both have blood on their hands you'll take a handshake over an uppercut. even if you can still see the bodies piling up behind them. even if you can only save like five people you know and not the thousands of people who are dying in the other room. because you believe the difference between 30,000 and 30,005 is still worth it even though no one needed to die in the first place and no one seems to agree with you. you have to keep living in this world every day. if anything changes it will take decades and it will never be enough. if this takes a toll on you good fucking luck surviving off the generosity of the warmonger state that claims to serve you. happy voting!!

[blackbeautifulqueen]

You dont love me anymore

Oswald Cobb x Black!reader

Y/n thinks Oswald is cheating on her.

You and Oz had been married for about a year at this point everything was good. Then when Vic came everything was better that is until Sofia came back. Sofia was gorgeous you couldn't deny that. Way prettier than yourself you believed. And when you say how close Oz and Sofia had gotten it made you sick to your stomach. He would never talk about business when he was home it was a rule you created. You didn't want to know how many people he had killed you never liked knowing those things. But that same rule had you hurt in the long run. You wanted to know what they were doing and any time you’d ask about Sofia hed say “there aint nobody else in the world I want but you” or “your all I need baby you know that” or even “its just business” but something was off. 

You had waited for Oz to come home and it was around 12 when you decided to go to bed. About 15 minutes go by of just laying there and you were so close to sleep but you heard the door open and soon after felt the bed dip. You took in his smell It wasnt any perfume you owned or any he owned. It killed you. 

The next moring you saw oz getting ready and wanted to do something nice so if he was cheating youd hope hed fell bad and this would pull him back to earth a bit, so you made him breakfast.

“I made you breakfast ozzie” I say with a smile he walked into the kitchen and kissed me then just held me for a moment.

“Thank you sweetheart” he said and took a piece of bacon popping it into his mouth.

“Hm this is good baby”

“You think so?” I said with a smile

“I know so” He said grabbing my hips

“Whats the plan today huh?” I ask

“Im going with Sofia-” I and with that name my face fell and I bit my lip. All noise was drowned out. Thank god he was behind me. 

“Hey sweetheart you good?” he asked I shook my head, yes bitting my lip. I didn't want to come off as the jealous wife so I just stayed silent as he continued with what he was gonna do today. Then he looked at his watch and said

“Oh, shit I've gotta go baby. I love you”

“Ok have fun. I love you too” I said as we kissed and I watched as he walked out the door.

I walked to the living room and went to the record player. All these albums that Oz had brought for me all cuz I said I like this song or this album. I pulled out beyonces lemadae album and started to blast it full volume.

And keep your money, I got my own

Keep a bigger smile on my face being alone

Bad motherfucker, God complex

Motivate your ass, call me Malcolm X

You operator, or innovator

Fuck you, hater, you can't recreate her, no, no

You'll never recreate her, no (hell no)

I started to sing. After my “concert” I went to get a bottle of wine. Withing 30 minuted a full bottle was gone and I got another. The pain of Oz wanting another women was to much for me. So instead I drowned my feelings. Almost as if it was a movie we find love starts playing and Oz walks though the door.

“You dont love me anymore

Lets see how you like this song”

“Baby?” Oz questioned and I stayed silent tears threatening to fall. 

“What the hell?” he asked

“What are you doing?” and I just looked at his through my tears and sang with the song

“You don't love me anymore” And stood up and walked to him. Pushed him back and sang

“Let's see how you like this song” cocking his head to the side

“What?” he asked

“You” I emphasise by pointing at him

“Don't love me” I say pointing at myself then laughing to keep myself from crying.

“Sweetheart, what the hell are you talking about?”

“Do I need to repeat?” I said in a conceding tone

“y/n” 

“Dont even start that “there's no other women for me” shit I fucking know what the fuck you do”

I say as he stares in shock

“Baby”

“Don't baby me why don't you baby that bitch your with instead of your fucking wife!” I yelled showing my ring

“y/n” He said loud enough so he wasn't yelling at me but I stopped talking

“y/n, baby, you talking bout Sofia?” he asked eyebrows raised

“...yes” I said quietly 

“Baby I'm doing this for us. I wasn't gonna tell you this but I killed Alberto Falcone. I'm hanging around Sofia to get in her good graces or whatever so she doesn't think it was me and more importantly she stays away from you.” It was silent for a moment then I asked

“Why did you kill him?” 

“...He laughed at me baby”

“Aw baby” I said and I reached for his face with my right hand

“Im sorry” I said with a sympathetic smile

“But you know I can take care of myself… right?”

“I know but I like to take care of ya doll. Its my job I gotta look out for you.” he said pushing your braids out of your face and giving you a kiss.

[insideliascrazyhead]

Sannoh Rengokai´s instagram shenaningans remix Sleepy Lion is actually a baby snake?!

Sooo I will keep the explenation short.I got a request to do some social media au for my fic.So here it is!Enjoy<3

Ice:Yo slutz!Take a fucking guess what I found?!

Sara:That party was legendary

Jesse:Hey,my husband!I gotta clutch my pearls at that shock....

Ice:Nah,bro.He loves me more.

Jesse:Whatever go fuck yourself as the only one Cobra fucks is me.

Dan:I still nearly vomit at the thought of that nasty ass hangover.

Yamaro:You´re weak.

Cobra:That was hilarious.

Dan:Yeah,you laugh Cobra!At least I learned a lesson that night! Cobra:Entertain me? Naomi:Us all please I need a god laugh...

Dan:That I´m a emotional people pleaser.More exactly a woman pleaser.

Cobra:No Dan.I´m a woman pleaser,you´re a lonely guy that was full of vomit.

Tetsu:You got Jesse though?

Jesse:Open relationship.At least when it comes to the sexual stuff

Yasushi:Hey Tsukasa guess what? Tsukasa:Yasushi I swear take your nasty paws away from my father or I will kill you dead!

Hyuga:So you and Cobra whore around

Rocky:No slut shaming only slut encouraging,but yeah

Jesse:Tsukasa log out.

Jesse:When I would do all the hella kinky shit Cobra´s into I would be dead...

Yasushi;Oh how I love this shit.Tsukasa I swear I´m gonna be your step dad soon.

Fujio:You got Kiyoshi.

Kiyoshi:So,Yasushi and your dad´s could easily use a fortht!

Sara:Heart eyes motherfuckers.

Cobra:Where on earth do you get those?

Sara:I´m a hoarder for media evidence.

Tsukasa:Why do they look like they went to a fucking LMFAO concert?

Yamasto:Drugs.

Cobra:Yamato!

Jesse:Stop it you fucking prick. Yamato:I´m sorry I mean PartySmarties,DiscoMints etc....

Rocky:Where did yall put Tsukasa then? Jesse:Granny´s house for the weekend.He get´s spoiled.We get fucked up on a rave.

Murayama:Cobra-chan and techno? Tetsu:Fuck yeah when he´s wasted enough he can listen to everything.

Naomi:I saw him poledance to Taylor Swift

Yamato:Hah.Weak.I saw him twerk to orchestra!

Rocky:I will pay you whatever you want for that video

Hyuga:Whatever Discoboy is bidding I double it!

Jesse:„Take that fucking thing outta my face or I will choke you till you´re dead!“

Tetsu:Cobra.Not in the mood.

Cobra:Fucking stalker

Jesse:Yeah,you´re fucking your stalker

Yasushi:Then whack your weasle from now on,I will marry Cobra.

Cobra:Not even in my worst nightmare.But the crazy kid is right,you´re whacking your weasle from now on.

Tsukasa:Yasushi,go and touch some fucking grass

Noboru:Cobra doesn´t have a crazy people fetish.

Yamato:No.He´s the crazy one in this relationship.

Chiharu:No.Really???

Yamato:Once when someone tried to rob the gas station Cobra dowsed both of them in gasoline.Took out a cigarette and told that guy he should run,if he doesn´t want Cobra to blow the entire gas station up.

Hyuga:That´s hilarious.

Fujio:Something Yasushi would do.

Shidaken:No way!That´s insanely suicidal.

Yasushi:Nah,I´m not suicidal.The world would be a better place without me and that´s exactly why I have to keep on living.

Fujio:Weirdly motivational

Jesse:Sleeping beauty.

Murayama:Now that´s what I come here for!

Hyuga:That´s borderline pornographic

Jesse:What?I didn´t even upload our sex tape! Yamato…. Ice:Exmotherfuckingscuseme?!

Sara:He´s showing chesticals for locals in heat.

Yasushi:This man so hot I´m pissing steam bitch

Cobra:Im not sleeping im dead leave flowers then go fuck yourself

Jesse:a dead person wouldn´t kick me outta the bed four fucking times with the way u move in ur sleep

Cobra:at least i don´t snore as loud as a chainsaw

Jesse:I don´t.You´re mean!Meanie Mouse!

Tsukasa:My bed vibrates fromn ur snoring old man

Jesse:grounded

Fujiio:You do though.I once thought it´s an earthquake

Jesse:Fujio you´re grounded too.

Fujio:You can do that?He can´t.Right?Cobra-san!

Murayama:Skipped to Itokan to visit Cobra-chan and look who I found!Sleepy-Lion/Baby snake! Leopard fur and cupcakes!That´s such a adorable remix of Cobra-chan and * ewww * Jesse

Fujio:Gotta go and buy a wedding ring!

Jesse:*clutching my pearls and dramatically wiping away a tear* Yasushi:Why he so relaxed tho?!Sannoh Stoner Squad?

Tsukasa:No.I´m just relaxed when you´re not around to force my will to live to jump from Oya´s roof.

Murayama:No Sleepy Lion No Rude Boying down the roof!

Kiyoshi:What´re you gonna do bout it old man? Shibaman:Lean over the railing and scream Tsukasa come back!

Rocky:I get that Cobra wants his genetics out there,looking like he does.But why Jesse?! Hyuga:How you know the kid won´t turn out ugly like Jesse tho?Made with love and not a quick nut?!Jesse probably takes two minutes in bed and I´m being generous here.

Kizzy:Rocky´s right tho.Cobra?Sexy.Jesse?Not so much.Cobra?Beautiful!Jesse low key ugly.

Ice:it´s crazy that Jesse didn´t scare baby Tsukasa to death with his ugly mug

Yamato:Okay can we move on now.I got it.Jesse looks so ugly that he should hide his face till halloween so he gonna scare the kids better.

Jesse:Low blow bro! Sara:The only one that´s blowing´s Cobra.

Noboru:most kids should be swallowed and not concived anyways.Not Tsukasa tho,he´s an angel and we´re thrilled to have him.

Naomi:Cobra´s treat now that he goes to therapy!Text wouldn´t fit on a cupcake. Cobra:Gonna take em anti sad bitch skittles like candy now.

Ice:Swollowing pills like candy will keep your grippy sock vaccation away!

Hyuga:Or cause him to loose the last marble and send him straight to the nut house! Chiharu:We´re gonna miss you Cobra-san.

Tetsu:Don´t forget us in there with your new friends.

Dan:What friends his hand he´s gonna start talking to? Cobra:Relax you drama queens.I ain´t gonna go to the nut house before I killed all three of you too avoid going to jail:)

Yamato:Hey,at least Noboru studied law for like two minutes!He can recommand a lawyer!

Yasushi:You know what they say about crazy guys,they´re the best in bed!

Hyuga:Yeah wait and see Cobra in the padded cell making boats outta popsicle sticks

Rocky:Miss thing....Too much.Hyuga,too much.

Cobra:It´s crazy i don´t snort glue around yall crazy bastards.

Yamato:You´re grumpy today.What´s the matter? Sara:Easy.Didn´t get laid in a while.

Yasushi:I´m available.

Murayama:I´m not gonna say I´m judging.All I say is I understand.

Tsukasa:I am judging tho.Heavily.Fuck you Yasushi.

Cobra:Had a beautiful trip to Oya today!Guess what I found!Murayama!Wanna explain what fun game yall where playing? Dan:of course first time Cobra posts anything it´s to cause drama

Tetsu:Or a gang war!

Murayama:Cobra-chan nooooo

Murayama:also to my defence i never heard of part time stakes...

Todoroki:Cobra never said the name of the game.

Fujio:Woah!What´s that?And why am I not on it? Nakaoka:Better question.Why do yall bid on the Yasu-kiyo jerks? Furuya:Cause they´re crazy enough to fight a crackhead and stab him with his own spoon

Yasushi:When Kiyoshi the bitch that he is got stabbed by a chick

Kiyoshi:Most beautiful day of my life.

Hyuga:That Yasushi kid is my kinda bitch.A bone to pick and not a fucking care in the world.?Oh yeah.Oya!That kids Daruma now.

Tsukasa:That was when all the factions fought er who will take over the full timers Fujio.

Shibaman:Also why does every photo taken look good as fuck.Even Yasushi.And that almost had me gagging.Exept Kiyoshi...

Yasushi:You can stop gagging when you don´t deep throat Todoroki´s dick! Tsuji:Kiyoshi kinda looks like he´s yerking his chicken.

Fujio:Murachi!Long story short the others will kill you...

Todoroki:Guys we´re not that ghetto.We´re not gonna kill anyone. Yasushi:Speak for yourself,sugar tits.The night´s still young and I´m craving violence.

Cobra:Man you gotta be the wet dream of every psychiatrist who enjoys a challenge huh?

Tsukasa:That treassure is hanging in Yamato´s garage.Thought I share this beauty with the world.

Fujio:I love this!Noboru looks ready to tap out as soon as Yamato looses conciousness.

Yamato:I was only attacked by this feral squirrel you call a father when I was seated.Other wise that garden gnome would´ve needed a ladder to even have eye contact with me.

Cobra:Seated because you we´re eating.If you continue Naomi´s gotta feed you with a pitchfork.

Yamato:At least I eat like a normal human being!Not only cupcakes and tequila.

Jesse:I saw him once eat fruitloops,with marshmallows,candy and beer cause we we´re outta milk

Noboru:That´s nasty man

Kiyoshi:Hey!Yasushi does that with energy drinks! Yasushi:I also use energy drinks instead of water for coffee.Your point. Todoroki:That explains everything

Rocky:I love how Cobra and Jesse are in a relationship for years and have a kid together when this photo exists and is a year old

Jesse:Foreplay.

Cobra:Jesse!

Jesse:Oh yeah,my mistake.Foreplay would be a lot rougher.

Cobra:At least I didn´t loose my shoe mid fight like fucking cinderella.

Jesse:All I hear is that I´m a princess and I agree.

Ice:*wiping tears*remember in your early relationship?When you destroyed Jesses bed,couch and kitched table to the point of no repair?Good times.

Sara:They had a good time.I fucking wish I would be deaf.

Yamato:At least you´re not living two houses down.I heard that once.

Dan:Why does Cobra get so much action anyways and then there´s me.

Tetsu:Overworked and underfucked.Got it.

Naomi:Oh calm down you big baby.

Tetsu:Partying hard just like his fathers! Jesse:*le gasp* Zebra!Traitor.

Cobra:You dramatic little bitch.Stop crying.

Ice:Grown up so quickly.

Rocky:Oh yeah where where you when your son got wasted`? Cobra:Nowhere with no one doing nothing with nobody.

Noboru:It wasn´t even in Club Heaven...

Yamato:That´s it!Innocent!Lawyers decision! Naomi:He´s not a lawyer dumbass. Chiharu:Half a lawyer then!Congratulations he´s half innocent! Tsukasa:Relax,fun police.I was only slightly tipsy. Fujio:You tried to go to Jamuo in the middle of the night with a highlighter,cause he´s important.

Jamuo:At least you´re not Yasushi.I sleep with a knife under my pillow and a emergency sedative in a syringe near by bed strong enough to knock out a horse! Yasushi:Wow.Lovely.Fuck you you little woodland creature.

[molqr]

the ask game. can we get the soy

of courseeee you can its always spy pussy indulgence hour here. or however the meme goes. smiles face

this is loooowwwngg so im putting it under a cut for any poor fucker who may stumble upon it when they open the app lmfao. thanks for the ask mr musichead aka heavy tf2's husband. grins

how i feel about this character - gestures to bio and pfp and everything about me. god. im sick in the head about her. i originally didnt like spy all that much but, like a horrible mold, he grew on me when i realised that while he claims to be better than everybody else, he really isnt. maybe even a bit worse, and god, isnt that just the funniest, stupidest fucking thing ever. have you heard some of those voice lines, shes a fucking clown. anyway. i love spy tf2 but also dear god i hate him. if he was real i'd throw a brick at him and then kiss him. terrible choice really but i wouldnt have it any other way. thank you shithead frenchman with terrible horrible problems i like to study. as for a more comprehensive thing though: i really do just think spy is interesting. i think its weird and fascinating that hes so put together and so off-putting all at once. i love thinking about what happened between him and scout's mother. i like making him a pathetic absentee father. i like that he has identity issues. i like that i can make her a woman. that spy can be a bit of a wreck and extremely put together at the same time, that when a character wants to keep everything a secret, any information you have on them feels personal. i like it when spy is written the way thick fog feels. oh and did i mention i desire him most horribly. id assume thats obvious by now. spy is like a rubix cube to me. a boring little square who i regretfully want to shoot my shot at piecing together despite the fact i am not good at puzzles.

all the people i ship romantically with this character - ME MOTHERFUCKER!! kiddinggg. well. its true, but heres a better answer. tf2 is like the yaoi franchise to me, and spy is the most yaoiful of all simply because i specifically want to suck face with him, therefore, i make him suck face with many others. gay, i know. i fuck with most spy ships really, as long as theyre Good then i'll give them a shot. engiespy and sniperspy are classic general go-tos, but well written spoovy? yummmm my fucking dinnaaarrr. i also think that demospy and soldierspy can be fun if gotten right, and pyrospy just because i think it's really fucking funny. oh right and of course spyma. christ. they make me feel sickkk and one of them is barely even a proper character. sad. endlessly intruiged by their love nonetheless <3 still gotta write a fic for them sometime, i want to chew on em like a dog with a bone.

my non-romantic otp for this character - while i did literally just mention spoovy lmfao, i also just like it when heavy and spy are just close friends. they have many layers! im a sucker for the idea of spy knowing russian and that's how they start talking. i think they'd be teerrrribllleee gossips it'd be great. heavy never thought he'd be glad nobody else on the base can speak russian until he started gossiping with spy about the things hes seen on base. i know they talk sooo much shiiittttt. they probably have a bookclub too. // i also really like it when spy and pauling get to be friends, i feel like they entered some sort of understanding that while its paulings job to kill him if he keeps on snooping around, spy is going to snoop around anyway and just hope that when it happens, pauling kills him painlessly. but thats all theoreticals, right now they're talking about nothing- both kind of infuriating and relaxing for the both of them- while disposing of corpses. yknow, people who acknowledge that they might hate eachother in a slightly different world but right now they're friends because they realised overworked, tired, definitely too smart for this but still here anyway style bitches have to stick together. i think about the 'youve lied for her then?' 'oh! uh! not to you of course!' ' ,':I mhm...' interaction a lot. spy doesnt take it personally because she knows thats just paulings job, shes not surprised. she gets to be annoyed about it though, and will then do the same thing to pauling. i like their friendship. smilllessss.

my unpopular opinion about this character - i originally couldnt think of something to say in regards to spy but then it hit me like a flash of lightning. i think people make too much dark spyhead content. and i dont understand acting like the blu spy is better than the red one when theyre the same lady. back on the head though. like i cant lie i have a paticularly weakness for it at times but theres So Much Hard Angst. and it usually makes medic overly sadistic and horrible about it when i know thats not the case. 'but he kept him alive in the fridge!' says a theoretical hater. engineer was smiling when he blew of a guys arm in meet the engineer. soldier cuts off the blu teams heads and collects them. truly you can make near everything shit scary about these guys, but i just want to see more silly spyhead stuff if its going to be done so much. not to say i hate it perse i think its really fun, it just veers really heavily into overly sadistic torture stuff really fast?? my feeling on it is 'guy who watches cartoon violence and says what the fuck thats so fucked up what the hell hes dead you just hit him with a huge hammer' or something. its meant to be silly and i get wanting to have a dark spin on it, you cant forget its still silly at its core. i feel like ive complained about this before. anyway. lollipop chainsaw his ass! let him get back at medic but not in a paticularly sinister way! like, i dunno, dyeing all his birds an ugly shade of green or something. this seems more like me complaining about a trope of spy uhhh whats something more general about him as a character. errr. hes not as put together as it might seem? i think he'd be a bit more bloodthirsty about killing people when its not neccesary on missions and its just gross and weird? that people need to like, play into his grossness a bit more because hes wearing a full piece suit on a battlefield i know hes gross and sweaty. oh and that he wouldnt try to parent scout once he(scout) figures out theyre related because scout is 27 and doesnt give a fuck anymore. spy would sorta feel the need to from guilt but scout doesnt want that father-son relationship with spy because its too late and too weird. its just that spy is trying to project almost thirty years of feelings by imagining his son needs a father in his life as much as spy wanted his son in his life. but its too late. is that an unpopular opinion? idk. i just like making spy more torn up about the absentee father issue than scout is because i think its true. yeagh. out of all of them i feel like this is relatively tame in the 'unpopular opinions' levels. i have way more hot takes about the others. shruggssss

one thing i wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon - more making fun of him. stomping on his ego. being afraid of pyro for no reason. acting like a weird cat. acting like he hates hanging out with the others when its obvious hes having fun deep down. getting to be a weirdo. i need to see what the finale of the 'pretends to be tom jones while scout is dying' thing is. my prediction is that soldiers going to talk about killing tom jones in comic 7 and scout goes WHAT!! BUT HE WAS THERE WHEN I DIED!! and it all comes piecing together and spy has a Horrible day. if it was up to me i'd get to see more of spy and scout's ma on dates too or something because i think theyre really cute. i want more people to mention he smells bad because of the cigarette breath and to have him wheezing and coughing and spluttering after every 5 breaths. can medic have an organ transplant hall of shame with 3 pairs of spys shrivelled lungs? please.

anyway. im very normal about The Soy.

i had to do something like this or id die. xoxo

oh and the ask game itself x <- behold

[queenerdloser]

also i AM playing veilguard and i made a wee pocket sized lad of a man for my first rook and i love him and his boyband hair. spoilers & reactions below the cut.

my first rook is a lord of fortune mage w/the plan to romance lucanis. he's very snarky and i love him.

i'm glad they made the call to go back to the like. da2 style of dialogue.

me so far every time rook talks to solas: get his ass!!!!!!

that said, i feel like they're making solas like rook too quick. what the fuck. it took my inquisitor like YEARS to build a rapport with this motherfucker.

i hate the combat lol. maybe i'll enjoy it more when i get used to it but there's too many moving pieces to keep track of for me. my favorite combat is where i can just like mash one button and easily kill everything in my path, i don't want to be strategic and have to micromanage everything. also what is this three potions bullshit. even dai gave you 10. and i have to like find them in random pots????? what the fuck????

very fun to sprint and jump. makes me feel zoom.

why do the elves just accept that their gods are back and evil? like. it feels like they accept it WAY too quickly lol.

dialogue so far is uh. very cheesy. a lot of "we're all great so let's work together!" stuff that is like. fine. but cheesy.

i'd die for lace harding. she looks so cute in this game.

when solas stabbed varric i SCREAMED. i was like. do NOT kill my boy in the first fifteen minutes!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm still only like a couple of hours in but varric was being suspiciously sick in the cutscenes so i have feeling he is going to die :((((

me: where is my BOYFRIEND (lucanis) and my FUTURE BOYFRIEND (davrin)

i love neve but i have a feeling we are going to butt heads a lot lol. i'm playing my rook as the reckless, confident type with a saving person thing that feels true to what we know about his backstory and he's already disagreed with neve several times. whoops.

i love the little marker showing me exactly where to go. hell yeah, hold my hand with this bullshit. kind of glad they dumped the open world of dai and got us back on rails.... tho that may change as i get further in the game???

when i say i spent HOURS in the character creator.... like i love it but it honestly felt like TOO much tbh. esp. when i had to do it for rook and then immediately again for my inquisitor too.

i ended up going lord of fortune background almost entirely bc i liked their casual look the best but i think i'll definitely try to play most of the backgrounds. they're so fun! i was THIS close to doing shadow dragons.

honestly minrathous is really cool???? all the locations so far have been great, love the lighthouse. (v. funny 2 me that we get all of these cool locations thanks to solas. man knows how to find a cool spot and name it i guess.)

the updated blight is VERY creepy. also those new darkspawn??? i gasped.

i do like that they're playing solas as this like. enemy who is begrudgingly allied due to worse enemies. but i'm so curious how they'll play it when the inquisitor gets involved. i'm doing my kai lavellan inky who DEFINITELY is going to try to stop solas at all costs... uh oh lol.

i know people were salty about not getting to integrate a lot of dai choices but tbh i'm fine with it. i'm more happy we got to include our inquisitor tbh.

morrigan showing up looking younger than she did in da:o.... um okay lol. also i kind of hate that she's considered an expert on elven history yet again. stop that.

im going to say again i hate the combat bc i really do hate it. praying it grows on me as i get more used to it bc otherwise i'm enjoying the game a lot.

[cinnaminsvga]

zee. im just thinking. do you perhaps… remember…. that pirate yoongi fic you wanted to do? zee, the way it still has my whole heart. im not even pushing you to write it or anything i just want you to remember. the idea is a masterpiece zee, yoongi yearning for waitress yn in the inmese vast sea…. zee i can hear the waves and birds and the bustling bar and yoongi’s heartbeat when he sees her for the first time after months….. how hoseok knows whats going on and kinda everyone knows but hes his captain and as intimidating and powerful he comes off to everyone else he knows how awkward matters of the heart are for him, hes so quiet that its painful to see him so in love and unable to do shit about it, i can see yn smile being so bright and how she thinks yoongi is as handsome as ever, as charming and effortless charismatic, how he grabs everyone’s attention but is maybe too intimidating for anyone to actually go and interact to him and how the stares bother him, how it makes him itch to go run for the sea and sail far far away to places no one knows about and people so different and stuff so marvellous she cant even imagine, so shes just nice to him. what can she do? she cant compare to the inmense beauty of the world, shes just a girl he used to know, just the past, so she’s just nice to him. but she hopes that maybe, maybe she’s just nice enough for him to feel a bit at home. a bit at ease. and everyone keep telling her he’s here for her but they are just teasing. hoseok is just pushing it, and seokjin is an asshole, and jungkook just loves the drama. it cannot be. so she’s just nice, never desperate nice, never please stay nice, even though she’s dying to beg, so she doesnt stay long, just to make sure, and yoongi watches her leave with both regret and relief cause her presence is so overwhelming and hes already used to the yearning but by god he loves that woman and just wants a second more, of calm, of making sure she’s still everything she dreams of at the sea, and UGH ZEE its too good, im so grateful you thought about this.

THE WAY I WAS JUST THINKIN ABOUT PIRATE YOONGI BC I WAS GOING THROUGH MY OLD WIP TAG ON MY BLOG LMAOOOO

"how it makes him itch to go run for the sea and sail far far away to places no one knows about and people so different and stuff so marvellous she cant even imagine, so shes just nice to him" <- do you know how much this kills me. like you get it, anon. YOU GET ME!!!

I AM GRABBING YOU BY THE SHOULDERS. YOU GET HIM FR DAWG!!! THE FUCKING YEARNINGADKNGKSDJVD but oh GOD how they refuse to let themselves yearn bc they see each other as Untouchable but for totally different reasons.

"never please stay nice" is such a perfect description for pirate!yoongi's oc. like you get it. YOU GET IT. I THINK IM GOING THROW UP FROM HOW MUCH YOU GET IT!!!!!

and the worst part is that they can have each other sooooo easily. like nothing is keeping oc back home, and despite what yoongi and oc may think, nothing is keeping yoongi at sea either. they're both stubborn but out of selflessness bc they'd never be the reason either of them were the cause of regret.

they are literally "love me if you wish but please don't let me be the reason you give up being yourself" but then also "oh but my love i am not myself without you" AND IT TEARS ME APARTSDKFKSDKCS

head in hands, anon. head in my motherfucking hands.

[carebeartherese]

Semi-live blogging the finale of Loki:

-HERE WE GO

-hoping for Lokius this ep

-Im terrified and also have a whole monster in my system

-backwards intro????

-I BELIEVE IN YOU LOKI

-ok how we fix

-Aw mobius checking on him

-oh and he spaghettied again

-you got this Loki

-mobius is so confused

-also love the upbeat music

-confusing literally anyone

-skin? pt2

-again ig

-this shits not working

-love that mobius and sylvie are worried

-lmfao Loki is so tired of this shit

-mobius is so cute trying to help Loki

-NO NOT CENTURIES LATER

-what the hell is happening

-Loki is actually so funny rn

-wow he’s kinda hot when he’s smart

-NOT THE FINISHING MOBIUS SENTENCE

-NOT THE LAPELS GRAB

-THIS IS A CODE RED GAYS

-they should kiss already fr

-Aw the little arm grab

-OK I BELIEVE

-THIS MAY WORK

-GO GO GO GO GO

-GET IT TIMELY

-PLEASE

-“you’re being so brave.”

-the deadpan

-timely fighting for his life while Loki is so unenthused

-PLEASE LET THIS WORK

-HIT THE DAMN BUTTON

-EHATS HAPPENING

-DID IT WORK?????

-WE DID ITTTTTT

-COME BACK TIMELY

-HE MADE IT

-FUCK YES

-ITS WORKING HOLY SHIT

-THIS FEELS WAY TOO GOOD

-no

-no please

-this was supposed to work

-IT CANT BE OVERLOADING

-WE JUST FIXED KT

-EHAT THE FUCK

-MOTHERFUCKER

-timely no please

-not a scaling problem

-Loki is so tired man

-well it was nice knowing y’all ig

-why the fuck is the world like this

-now there’s no fixing

-wait i don’t wanna be back in the time tower thing

-PLEASE DONT MAKE THIS A SYLKI THING

-:0 MAYBE KILL HER???

-NO NO NO FUCK

-srsly how many times must we fight her

-maybe she does have to die if you want to stop everything

-is time frozen???

-ok he who remains is kinda funny

-Loki is literally so tired

-LET THE MAN REST

-reincarnation baby’s

-oh shit Loki can pause now

-damn

-hes kinda fine

-Alr chitchat time

-a failsafe??

-the tva is not easy to rebuild

-what about the people???

-“kiddo”,”champ”

-but why does he always loose

-where do we go from here??

-WHEN do we go from here

-wait break the loom?

-yea your friends would die loki

-tough choices = big chair

-ok let’s go find another way ig

-this sucks

-break loom or kill sylvie???

-wait this sucks actually

-wait mobius???

-Aw the og interrogation

-they should be gay already

-wow mobius is the one loki goes to for advice???

-oh mobius story time

-wait was the hunter mobius??

-dude this is crazy shit

-babygirl that was just a kid

-mobius are you ok

-NO I LOVE HIM

-oh that was ravonna!! who pruned that kid!!!

-mobius has some wise shit to say

-WAIT WHY DOES THIS FEEL LIKE A GOODBYE

-WAIT MOBIUS COME BACK

-omg he’s flashing back to the times he’s lost his people :(((

-oh wait he paused

-ok it’s either the loom dies or sylvie dies

-I feel like there’s probably a clear option bbg

-DONT KISS PLS

-this should end on friend terms

-you two are so fucking poetic and for what

-no don’t tell him that sylvie

-Loki make the right choice please and just kill her

-ok where are we going back to????

-and why???

-for what

-oh it’s all his people in one place :(

-NO NO LOKI

-mobius got worried

-LOKI STOP

-DUDE NO

-LOKI STOP BEING SO AMBIGUOUS

-both of them are so in love with him

-but which will he choose??

-love island shit

-while Loki fucking dies????

-THE HORNS

-HES BACK BITCH

-IM TERRIFIED

-THE TIMELINES ARE EVERYWHERE

-EHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING

-this is spooky y’all

-ewwww bad noise

-what did he just do

-THE BRANCHES ARE DYING?????!

-hes aliving them???

-hes so babygirl

-I need him to make a choice in lovers tho

-LOKI WHERE ARE YOU GOING

-YOURE LEAVING YOUR LOVES BEHIND

-NO NO NO

-WHAT IS HAPPENING RN

-no HES the new time bitch

-Im actually so scared

-no no he can’t stay here at the end!

-NO HE CABT BE ALONE THIS ISNT FAIR TO HIM

-HE CANT HOLD TIME TOGETHER ALONE

-what in the seven fucks is happening

-not after

-this shit is unfair

-POOR MOBIUS

-hes just lost the only friend he ever had

-how do these people live without the one person holding them together

-HE REQUESTED LOKIS FILE

-not to be a bitch but it should’ve been sylvie

-HES LEAVING??

-FOR WHERE

-HE JUST WANTED TO BE WITH HIS FUCKING BOYFRIEND AGAIN

-ok I love you b-15 but he is heartbroken fr

-THE LACK OF LOKIUS IS HURTFUL TO ME

-wow the war room is pack today

-aww hi OB

-HES MAKING NEW COPIES

-victor grew up a candle maker

-ravonna is at the end of time!!!!!!!!

-hahahahah bitch

-oh she’s boutta get eaten

-MOBIUS PLAYING WIRH HUS KIDS

-HES SO FATHER FIGURE

-aww look at present mobius

-ugh why is sylvie here

-NO SHIT ITS WEIRD LOKI ISNT HERE

-mobius seems more fucked up about this than I thought he’d be

-meanwhile sylvie is fine

-oh Loki check-up????

-hes doing???

-hes alive I guess???

-did he see mobius????????

-I cannot believe that’s the end omfg

-Im kinda upset that I got queerbaited again but like I knew it was gonna happen 🤷‍♀️

[butcherfoxes]

GRGRGGFGH ok so bioshock right. Well eleanor lamb is from bioshock 2 but the base knowleghe you need of bioshock is that This Motherfucker made a city underwater bc he sucks ass. and used the final pam morals of No Rules Just Right. WELL they discover The Slug That Gives You Superpowers and go hrmm how could we make a profit from this (the city is capitlism world except its worse than captilism bc the guy thought american captilism was Too good to poor people) anyway so they figure out if they put the slug in little girls they can make super power drugs. WELL now they have a bunch of freakish little girls running around and people keep killing the little girls to get the drugs which is No Bueno. so theyre like “hey!! lets take our prisoners and brainwash them so heavily they genuinely cant think of anything Except protecting the girls!” yay! ok so this chick Sofia Lamb comes to rapture to be an awesome psychiatrist who loves to help poor people and also shes a single mom. Well andrew ryan the guy who made the city is like hrm. helping poor people is bad. and has her arrested. and then custody of her daughter Eleanor goes to this other chick who Loses Her Immediately and now shes being taken care of by this other guy whos like man fuck them kids and sells eleanor to the little sister orphanage which is really a sort of factory to make the freak girls. except this is Before they figure out the “brainwash prisoners to protect the girls” so theyre still figuring that out. WELL they figure it out by expirimenting on this one guy Yay! so they do it some more to other guys and As It Turns Out if the brainwash dudes get seperated from their little sister too long they either Die or Go Insane oh fuck! anyway back to subject delta whos the first guy to have that bond and eleanor the first one to. also have that bond. ok so now eleanor is Really attatched to subject delta and calls him her father also shes like 7 years old. anyway so theyre chilling Yayy! except her mother sofia lamb escapes from prison and is like fuck youuu die thats MY daughter. die. forever. and kills subject delta and does Things so that eleanor isnt a little sister anymore shes just a little girl. ok so while delta is dead sofias like hrmm wouldnt it be awesome if we created the perfect person whos super awesome by injecting them with Every Drug? well this goes bad. also sofia is a cult leader now. so sofias like Well eleanor my young daughter should be immune to the drug bc she was exposed to the drug. so actually im going to raise my daughter completely isolated from everyone so she wont be tainted and the cult is going to revolve around this little girl sacrificing herself to be the perfect most special guy in the world. yay! Well 10 years pass eleanor is a Teenager now and figures out how to revive subject delta bc kind of her mom sucks. this is the start of the plot of bioshock 2 Well subject delta goes on this epic journey to save his adoptive daughter and makes Moral Decisions which is to say the player gets to make moral decisions. and this seemingly effects nothign until closer to the end where when (spoilers) delta saves eleanor by turning her into a badass big sister (girls with big knives) u get little Hints of oh ! oh my choices mattered ! bc eleanor will either be viscously murdering everything in her path Including Children and laughing maniacally abt it OR going lalala..dont hurt my dad ok..and i save the children..anyway skip to the end there are like a bunch of endings but the one my profile pic is inspired by is where (more spoilers) subject delta dies but also so does eleanors mom But Also so do all the little sisters but eleanor escaped the city so eleanor is Completely Alone and also she was born and raised in the city so this is her first time on the surface and basically bioshock 2 is like undertale 5 years before undertale

jaw dropp...this sounds so interesting ill likely never get into bioshock but that sounds cool as hell

[majoringinsarcasm]

Oh I’m gonna fucking cry. That really was the last story she read to them before leaving

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FUCK NOT TAI NOT SAD DAD SHIIIIIIT

She’s lying this isn’t an Oz mission. Does she leave her emblem behind on each mission is that the promise. She leaves it with the girls and picks it back up when she comes back that’s the promise is this a routine. I’m gonna throw up

OH MY FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOD ROSEBIRD USER IS GONNA FUCKING DIE RAVEN RAVEN KNEW

IM. speechless this is everything

I’m gonna THROW UP

IM LITRRWLLT I’m shaking what the fuck

Is. Is he gonna die. Are they. Are they really gonna kill him is the saving a sacrifice I’m gonna

WHAT THE FUUUUUUUCK CAL IS GONNA SHIT HOLY FUCK

Please now iM THE ONE WHO CANT DO THIS PLEASE

STOOOOOOOOP IM CRYING

SHUT UP SHIT UP SHIT UP SHUT THE FUCK UP ATOP STOP

RED LIKE ROSES PART THREE IS THAT YOU MY BELOVED IS THAT YOU WHAT WEVE BEEN WAITING FOR MY DEAR

IM STILL WORRIED ABOUT JAUNE IF HE FIES I WILL NOT BE OK EVER AGAIN

TUBY FIDNT FIE BC SHE DRANK THE TEA WE STILL DONT KNOW IF ALYX BEVAME ANYTHING AFTER THE CAR KILLED HER IF HE FIES WILL HE STAY. DESD FOR REAL

The fact that she’s smiling as she grabs crescent rose. It’s so hard to save people it’s So hard to fight a battle you think you can’t win it’s so hard to believe you aren’t the cause for misery. But Ruby MADE that weapon. That is part of her bc she put her love into making it all on her own. The burden will always feel heavy. She’s not strong enough to do it alone but she’s not alone. She’s strong enough to carry herself though. She’s Enough and she ALWAYS HAS BEEN EVEN WHEN SHE FAILED I CANT SEE IM CRYING SO MCJJ

Y’all don’t understand how. Fuck dude. Ruby is my favorite character after Penny like Penny is S+++ and Ruby is right after her. This volume has meant so much to me and to not only see her SMILING IN A FIGHT I don’t think we’ve seen her GRIN like that in a deadly fight that’s usually Yang. To see her be so confident with HER weapon. You can come back to yourself. You can forgive yourself. You can have all the support in the world but supporting yourself is so hard and she thought she lost it she thought she had to be someone else in order to be better. But she didn’t. All she needed was actual time to grieve. To breathe. To be alone with herself to GIVE HERSELF MORE CREDIT TO LOVE HERSELF AS SHE IS SHE NEEDED TO LOVE RUBY ROSE AND JUST

I took my glasses off bc I just the tears

You ARE enough. Just as you are. We grow and change with time. We make mistakes. We WILL fail. But we are enough even in failure bc there is always another chance to do better. To be better FOR OURSELVES

LMAO FJDKDBDJDNDJFNDJDJNDJDJDJD NEO???!!?

So I’m pausing right here to say something I know people won’t like and I’m NOT trying to justify anything. But I’m going to say this: You can regret hurting someone very badly. You can regret hurting someone who you sincerely wanted to hurt. This won’t earn forgiveness. This won’t earn sympathy. Regret is a feeling you carry On Your Own. It won’t erase past actions. It won’t dictate how others see you in the future. It won’t make those you hurt forgive or even care about your sad backstory. But you can FEEL regret. Regret is not something you have to earn. It’s just a feeling you have. What you do with that regret is ALSO on you and if nobody ever forgives you then feeling regret doesn’t mean they should.

But Neo is allowed to feel regret. It doesn’t change what she did or how people will feel about her. It wasn’t written to make people feel BAD for her. It’s just showing she is capable of regret. Doesn’t erase the gleeful murders. Doesn’t erase what she did to Ruby. It’s just a Feeling.

No motherfucking way. Oh my god Cal must be convulsing holy shit bricks no WAY

This episode is W for everyone so FAR BUT IM STILL SCARED FOR JAUNE

BABY BABY BABY BABY

CUT THE CAMWRAS IM GONNA XEH AGAIN

THEY HAVE A LITTLE CAPE

THE HEART RARELY FORGETS

Sorry I was crying so much about Somewhat I forgot the actual lore of the show lemme pay attention

The brothers CAME FROM THE TREE

Damn thank you Blacksmith for giving us the stopping Salem from ending the world or whatever she actually wants to do cheat code

THIS WILL BE THE DAY I HEAR YOU

MY BOY MY BABY BOY THERE HE IS THERES MY SPECIAL LITTLE GUY

Ok so it’s kinda like Narnia it seems. The trip happened for all of them but maybe once they leave they will pop out with not a lot of time passed?

NO IM NOT READY FOR THIS TO BE OVWR NOOOO

Fuck me man

I am forever changed I truly think something healed today

[bpdonni]

im falling apart and i dont know if i can fix it.

ive never felt worse in my life. ive been in the psych ward twice, but those times don't hold a candle to now.

i cant afford to live. i cant afford to die. my family can see that im struggling-the very ugly and worst parts of myself are on full blast. im hurting everyone, especially cedric. he's just trying to keep everything afloat, but im too busy in my own head to do what i need to in order to make up for it. most people who interact with me hate me. i always wondered why, but as i lay around in this ball ive been in all day, im realizing that everything i was put through was too much. it made me into a monster. im always mooching off my mom and brother but they hardly ever even message me anymore. my own fucking father hates me. my best friend in the world got tired of my shit. ive become tired of trying, so i only really try at the one thing that keeps me useful at all. the only thing that is keeping me alive, but killing me even more: work. i like my job! but its lonely because of the night shift, and that im too awkward to try to make any friends there.

my coping mechanisms are further dragging me down. ordering food when we can't afford it at all. hypersexuality. self-isolation. it's making me a selfish, horrible person. but was i ever not a shitty person? i don't think so. all i have to offer anymore is the money i make that very barely keeps us afloat. and i keep going to the train station, but i just... can't end it. i want to. but i can't bring myself to do it. whether it's because of the stop being crowded, or chickening out, or realizing me dying won't actually lessen the load on my family... i know this last point to be true in theory, but what good am i doing here? i dont have the energy to be the parent i need to be. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO BE A PARENT I LOVE THEM I SHOULDN'T FEEL LIKE THIS BUT WHY DID THEY DO THIS TO ME WHY THE DUCK AN I THE ONE PICKING UP THE PIECES IM BIPOLAR AND BPD IM DOOMED BY THE MOTHERFUCKING NARRATIVE WHY ME WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY IM DESTINED TO KILL MYSELF IM NOT GONNA LIVE PAST 30 SO WHY AM I THE FUCKING ONE WHO HAS TO DO THIS WHY COULDN'T THEY STAY OFF METH WHY DO THEY REFUSE TO LOVE ME- ah i can't blame them on that last part i hate me too. that's in large part their fault. and the part of my life that i cling to, the one thing i know for certain: my queerness. i love it but why couldn't it be something that you know people liked? so many people voted for donald fucking trump so they could see people like me kill themselves for their comfort? why do i need to be the bigger person and deal with it? i can barely think of anything else besides death, WHY? my baby polar bear. it occurred to me that i think she was actually only 10 or 11. what did i do wrong? i know the answer to that. couldn't afford to take her to the vet when i KNEW something was wrong? now instead of paying back the vet, im drowning in the costs to cremate her. god, i cant get her face out of my mind. i tried to close her eyes, her mouth, but rigor mortis had set in too much. i could smell the death on her not quite breath. i took the responsibility of making sure the kids and my partners didn't have to see that. i wish she hadn't been alone. i wish that i had checked her cage as soon as i came home. god, the smell of death is one that you never forget. i can still smell it now. from when i saw the decapitated corpse and her sloughing skin, to boo boo... this is the most raw look of death ive ever seen, two instances in the past couple of months. it's gross, it's ugly, it's scary. so why do i want to be dead so bad? why do i want to do this to everyone i love? why can't people see that im in complete fucking ruin? it's starting to become pretty apparent now, but still. i can't really... get this out. because if i tell anyone the extent, my trips to the train station, typing my legal information in my phone when i forgot to bring my id, because i was so sure that time that i was going to do it. ive also been staring longingly out the window of the 7th floor at work, thinking about taking the elevator to the 10th floor and jumping. it'd be a nice view before i go at least. i could also take all the pills in the house (except the others prescriptions.) weve got all these huge bottles of tylenol- talked to my husband. theyre making me a grilled cheese.

[noorkasamundar]

~im patched up, and sewed with scars all over again, it hurts~

I can feel my palpable hunger. It's growling slowly, softly eroding the acid in my stomach. But this is not about food. This is not about how much I long to be fed and cared for. This is about me doing nothing to curb my insane hunger. Nothing at all. I cannot leave my seat until it is time for me to eat. I am not allowed to eat before that. My existence means nothing earlier than the time assigned to me.

I am external to my own hopes and feelings. I am a creature of habit, lost and so fucking confused because all my patterns are changing now. I don't bite all my nails off at once. I'm eating and sleeping and living. What the actual fuck? Where are my habits, pulling me into those cyclical bouts of depression and anxiety?

Wait, slow down.

Numbness engulfs me. I want love. Someone to hold and kiss. Oh gosh, this is crazy. Did you know insane people dress really well? I cleaned and ate and worked and I'm breaking all my natural habits to co-exist with criminals.

Criminal behavior is cool. I want to kill them. Preferably kill me, burn all my notes to the fucking ground, and forget I ever felt a single fucking thing.

I'm so lonely. I'm laughing internally. No, those are tears of blood. Fuck, Fuck, Shit. Ha ha ha.

I stole shit when I went shopping. I steal things and cry about pants that don't fit my ugly legs anymore. Self-deprecation is so much fun! Ha, you thought I was getting better. What in the world does getting better even mean?

I am literally a social construct and would not exist if everything never existed and existence is so taxing. I need sleep. I want to kill you, maim your skin with scars given from a Swiss knife. I carry poison around like it's something to be proud of.

FUCK, FUCK, SHIT.

Bye bye bye.

Materialistic shit is so fucking cool. Buy me stationary thanks, wait not those pens. My favorite color is green, idiot.

Do you think Dolphins know they will all die one day? I want to taste pizza with ketchup again. Let's get pizza and watch the stars and no, never mind, you remind me of my dead father.

Grave? Oh you mean mine? Yeah, it's already prepared. A death note, a step-by-step process. I intend to be a rich dead motherfucker that takes her own life. Gunshot to the head, blood names on the walls, and a shit ton of cash floating in that bloody bath.

Blood money. Use it at will.

Bye bye, fuck.

[cowboy-robooty]

ok actual review for people who gaf.

SPOILERS BELOW

i am a die hard deadpool fan and watched the first two when they came out in theatres. Ive been waiting on this one for a loooooong time and ngl it disappointed me. I dont think it was the worst thing in the world but it definately had marvel disney aids infect it. Somehow it feels less raunchy and vulgar compared to the last two? I feel like the film steadily declines in quality as it goes on, with the last third feeling like its just dragging on. I dont think there were enough fourth wall breaks or meta quips despite the fact that many were included. It felt like it was still lacking... like a blizzard without enough brownie pieces. I think deadpool doesnt have enough quips or little jokes sprinkled in throughout fight scenes and there actually felt like a distinct lack of comedic homoeroticism somehow. Like deadpool and wolverine definately had insane tension and that car fight was them having merry sexmas until the literal crack of dawn and deadpool even did that whole gay orgy joke in the beginning, but like this is nothing compared to the gay shit hed do to colossus with in the first two movies. I know I sound biased because I love deadpool x colossus, but seriously this couldve been fixed quite easily by just adding more yaoi lolz to the existing scenes with deadpool and wolvarine. If i were to give suggestions like.. how about in that scene where they are clawing/shooting eachothers sides why doesnt deadpool instead tickle his sides for a moment and then for a bit it turns into some fairy gay tickle fight for the lolz. or how about more on screen dick fondling from deadpool during any of the many, many scenes they have where they're laid down together/pressed against eachother. just anything like that really you know like remember deadpool is all about the jokes. I felt like sometimes he wasnt distinct enough in calling shit out. Like the joke where we see dramatic openings for the random motherfuckers in the boarderlands as a way of making fun of how marvel movies always have the "audience stand and clap" intro shots too. Its obviously a joke, but I wish deadpool mocked it a little more and talked more about it out loud, since his entire thing is not letting anything go and having to be annoying about everything. There were a lot of moments like that, especially when wolvarine forced deadpool to spare cassanova. I was expecting a lot of banter for that moment and honestly deadpool killing her because thats the deadpool way. I thought at the very least if they didnt kill her (because marvel rules) he would at least go "if she becomes a problem later im saying I TOLD YOU SO!" and then a call back to that when she inevitably ruins everything from being spared. but there was nothing and it made the movie feel less deadpool because of that. He just simply doesnt make enough quips. Also there were some jokes that actually made me cringe in a way of thinking "this will age so poorly". I like deadpool because its cringey and vulgar in a way that it makes you regress back into a 12 year old again where swearing and violence is the coolest shit ever (bc it is). But i really didnt like how deadpool used some lingo that obviously will age badly like saying "let him cook!" I know deadpool is all about using popular slang and referencing popular media, but the first two movies still feel timeless because they never cut out exact phrases like that which will be so distinctly dated in a few years. The pop culture references are timeless ones in the first two movies and anything that will become dated is subtley put in like the adventure time watch he wears n stuff. I actually like that theres references like these only in the visual details, because I think that him wearing a watch like that and having small details in the bg with his items makes the pop culture references feel much more deadpool and funny, since it isnt him just saying shit to sound relatable, its just him owning this stuff because he genuinely likes watching the show.

Theres an entirely different feel to this movie and it is definately from the heightened budget and change in management from the shit going on with studios or whatever. The first two movies felt closed off in a way. The world honestly felt kind of empty but I liked it because it was acknowledged in universe and utalized to make the limitations of a lower budget just apart of the joke. This movie feels like an open, normal world and it is definately because now they have the resources to make it have more than like 3 guys talking. I like both feelings honestly, and this is a neutral change to me since it is just a fundamentally different sensation for the movie experience. The problems i have with the different vibes though is that the first two movies felt distinct from other marvel movies. The plot is small. its simple. the movies feel succinct and the limited cast is worked to its advantage so you really feel a dynamic between everyone. And most importantly, the stakes are hinged upon primarily interpersonal relationships rather than saving the world. I think that deadpool is so fun because wade wilson has never been about doing the right thing for justice, hes about just doing the *right* thing. I like that the first two movies had stakes that boiled down to being like saving his gf or a stupid kid (since cable was gunna kill him anyways lol like the world would not end if deadpool didnt save him). It fits his character and gave him the wiggle room to do marvel movie sins like actually killing the bad guy without giving a fuck and just doing fuck all sometimes. It really does feel like Deadpool 3 is suffering from catching a case of marvel aids and honestly that is the biggest thing that let me down. Its the root cause of all the other problems I see like the lack of incorporating previous movie characters and shit, having too much shit going on, unsatisfying execution of core themes, etc etc. I dont want to keep writing about this, but yeah deadpool 3 like didnt kill my grandma but it is SIGNIFICANTLY worse than the first two movies. I'd definately rec the first two as i adore them and theyre classics but the third is really mehhhh if you wanna watch it go ahead *shrugs*

watched deadpool & wolverine wif wiener today.... 0/10 no deadpool x colossus yaoi what was even the fucking point

[tarobytez]

disability in the Six Of Crows Duology; an analysis of Kaz Brekker, Wylan Van Eck, and the fandom’s treatment of them.

****Note: I originally wrote this for a tiktok series, which im still going to do, but i wanted to post here as well bc tumblr is major contributor to what im going to talk about

CW: ableism, filicide, abuse

In the Six of Crows duology, Leigh Bardugo delicately subverts and melds harmful disability tropes into her narrative, unpacking them in a way that I, as a disabled person, found immensely refreshing and…. just brilliant. 

But what did you all do with that? Well, you fucked it up. Instead of critically looking at the characters, y’all just chose to be ableist. 

For the next few videos paragraphs im going to unpack disability theory (largely the stuff surrounding media, for obvious reasons) and how it relates to Six Of Crows and the characterization of Kaz Brekker and Wylan Van Eck, then how, despite their brilliant writing, y’all completely overlooked the actual text and continuously revert them to ableist cariactures.

Disclaimer: 1. Shocker - i am disabled. I have also extensively researched disability theory and am very active in the disabled community. Basically, I know my shit. 2. im going to be mad in these videos this analysis. Because the way y’all have been acting has been going on for a long ass time and im fuckin sick of it. I don’t give a shit about non-disabled feelings, die mad

Firstly, I’m going to discuss Kaz, his play on the stereotypical “mean cripple” trope and how Bardugo subverts it, his cane, and disabled rage. Then, I am going to discuss Wylan, the “inspiration porn” stereotype, caregivers / parents, and the social model of disability. Finally, I will then explain the problems in the fandom from my perspective as a disabled person, largely when it comes to wylan, bc yall cant leave that boy tf alone.

Kaz Brekker

Think of a character who uses a cane (obviously not Kaz). Now, are they evil, dubiously moral, or just an asshole in general? Because nearly example I can think of is: whether it be Lots’O from Toy Story, Lucius Malfoy, or even Scrooge and Mr.Gold from Once Upon A Time all have canes (the last two even having their canes appear less and less as they become better people)

The mean/evil cripple trope is far more common than you would think. Villains with different bodies are confined to the role of “evil”. To quote TV Tropes, who I think did a brilliant job on explaining it “The first is rooted in eugenics-based ideas linking disability or other physical deformities with a "natural" predisposition towards madness, criminality, vice, etc. The Rule of Symbolism is often at work here, since a "crippled" body can be used to represent a "crippled" soul — and indeed, a disabled villain is usually put in contrast to a morally upright and physically "perfect" hero. Whether consciously on the part of the writer or not, this can reinforce cultural ideas of disability making a person inherently inferior or negative, much in the same way the Sissy Villain or Depraved Homosexual trope associate sexual and gender nonconformity with evil. ”

Our introduction to Kaz affirms this notion of him being bad or morally bankrupt, with “Kaz Brekker didn’t need a reason”, etc. This mythologized version of himself, the “bastard of the barrel” actively fed into this misconception. But, as we the audience are privy to his inner thoughts, know that he is just a teenager like every other Crow. He is complex, his disability isn’t this tragic backstory, he just fell off a roof. It’s not his main motivation, nor does he curse revenge for making him a cripple - it is just another part of who he is. 

His cane (though the shows version fills me with rage but-) is an extension of Kaz - he fights with it, but it has a purpose. Another common thing in media is for canes to be simply accessories, but while Kaz’ cane is fashionable, it has purpose.

The quote “There was no part of him that was not broken, that had not healed wrong and there was no part of him that was not stronger for having been broken.” is so fucking powerful. Kaz does not want nor need a cure - its said in Crooked Kingdom that his leg could most likely be healed, but he chooses not to. Abled-bodied people tend to dismiss this thought as Kaz being stubborn but it shows a reality of acceptance of his disability that is just, so refreshing.

In chapter 22 of SOC, we see disabled rage done right - when he is called a cripple by the Fjerdan inmate, Kaz is pissed - the important detail being that he is pissed at the Fjerdan, at society for ableism, not blaming it on being disabled or wishing he could be normal. He takes action, dislocating the asshole’s shoulder and proving to him, and to a lesser extent, himself, that he is just as capable as anyone else, not in spite of, but because he is disabled. And that is the point of Kaz, harking back to the line that “there was no part of him that was not stronger for having been broken”. 

I cried on numerous occasions while reading the SOC duology, but the parts I highlighted in this section especially so. I, as many other disabled people do, have had a long and tumultuous relationship with our disability/es, and for many still struggle. But Kaz Brekker gave me an empowered disabled character who accepts themselves, and that means the world to me. 

Keeping that in mind, I hope you can understand why it hurts so much to disabled people when you either erase Kaz’s disability (whether through cosplay or fanfiction), or portray him as a “broken boy uwu”, especially implying that he would want a cure. That flies in the face of canon and is inherently fucking ableist. (if u think im mad wait until the next section)

Next, we have Wylan.  

Oh fucking boy. 

I love Wylan so fucking much, and y’all just do not seem to understand his character? Like at all? Since this is disability-centric, I’m not going to discuss how the intersection of his queerness also contributes to these issues, but trust me when I say it’s a contributing factor to what i'm going to say.

Wylan, motherfucking Van Eck. If you ableist pricks don’t take ur fucking hands off him right now im going to fight you. I see Wylan as a subversion another, and in my opinion more insidious stereotype pf disabled people - inspiration porn.

Cara Liebowitz in a 2015 article on the blog The Body Is Not An Apology explains in greater detail how inspiration porn is impactful in real life, but media is a major contributing factor to this reality. The technical definition is “the portrayal of people with disabilities as inspirational solely or in part on the basis of their disability” - but that does not cover it fully. 

Inspiration porn does lasting damage on the disabled community as it implies that disability is a negative that you need to “overcome” or “triumph” instead of something one can feel proud of. It exploits disabled people for the development of non-disabled people, and in media often the white male protagonist. Framing disability as inherently negative perpetuates ideals of eugenics and cures - see Autism $peaks’ “I Am Autism” ad. Inspiration porn is also incredibly patronizing as it implies that we cannot take care of ourselves, or do things like non-disabled people do. Because i stg some of you tend to think that we just sit around all day wishing we weren’t disabled. 

Another important theory ideal that is necessary when thinking about Wylan is the experience of feeling like a burden simply for needing help or accommodations. This is especially true when it comes to familial relationships, and internalized ableism.

The rhetoric that Wylan’s father drilled into his head, that he is “defective”, “a mistake”, and “needs to be corrected”, that he (Jan) was “cursed with a moron for a child” is a long held belief that disabled people hear relentlessly. And while many see Van Eck’s attempted murder of Wylan as “preposturous” and overall something that you would never think happens today - filicide (a parent murdering their child) is more common than you would like to believe. Without even mentioning the countless and often unreported deaths of disabled people due to lack of / insufficient / neglectful medical care, in a study on children who died from the result of household abuse, 40 of 42 of them (95%) were diagnosed with disabilities. Van Eck is not some caricature of ableist ideals - he is a real reflection on how many people and family members view disability. 

Circling back to how Wylan unpacks the inspiration porn trope - he is 3 dimensional, he is not only used to develop the other characters, he is just *chefs kiss* Leigh, imo, put so much love and care into the creation of Wylan and his story and character growth that is representative of a larger feeling in the disabled community. 

That being said, what you non-disabled motherfuckers have done to him.

The “haha Wylan can’t read” jokes aren’t and were not funny. Y’all literally boiled down everything Wylan is to him being dyslexic. And it’s like,,,, the only thing you can say about him. You ignore every other part of him other than his disability, and then mock him for it. There’s so much you can say about Wylan - simping for Jesper, being band kid and playing the fuckin flute, literally anything else. But no, you just chose to mock his disability, excellent fucking job!

Next up on “ableds stfu” - infantilization! y’all are so fucking condescending to Wylan, and treat him like a fucking toddler. And while partly it is due to his sexuality i think a larger portion is him being disabled. Its in the same vein of people who think that Wylan and Jesper are romantically one sided, and that Jesper only kind of liked Wylan, despite the canon evidence of him loving Wylan just as much. You all view him as a “smol bean”, who needs protecting, and care, when Wylan is the opposite of that. He is a fucking demolitions expert who suggested waking up sleeping men to kill them - what about that says “uwu”. You are treating Wylan as a burden to Jesper and the other Crows when he is an immensely valuable, fully autonomous disabled person - you all just view him as damaged. 

And before I get a comment saying that “uhhh Wylan isn’t real why do you care” while Wylan may not be real, how you all view him and treat him has real fucking impacts and informs how you treat people like me. If someone called me an “uwu baby boy” they’d get a fist square in the fucking jaw. Fiction informs how we perceive the world and y’all are making it super fucking clear how you see disabled people. 

Finally, I wanted to talk about how the social model of disability is portrayed through Wylan. For those who are unaware, the social model of disability contrasts the medical model, that views the disability itself as the problem, that needs to be cured, whereas the social model essentially boils down to creating an accommodating society, where disability acceptance and pride is the goal. And we see this with Wylan - he is able to manage his father’s estate, with Jesper’s assistance to help him read documents. And this is not out of pity or charity, but an act of love. It is not portrayed as this almighty act for Jesper to play saviour, just a given, which is incredibly important to show, especially for someone who has been abused by family for his disability like Wylan, that he is accepted. 

Yet, I still see people hold up Jesper on a pedestal for “putting up with” Wylan, as if loving a disabled person deserves a fucking pat on the back. It’s genuinely exhausting trying to engage with a work I love so much with a fandom that thinks so little of me and my community. It fucking shows. 

Overall, Leigh Bardugo as a disabled person wrote two incredibly meticulous and empowered disabled characters, and due to either lack of reading comprehension, ableism, or a quirky mix of both, the fandom has ignored canon and the experiences of disabled people for…. shits and giggles i guess. And yes, there are issues with the Grishaverse and disability representation - while I haven’t finished them yet so I do not have an opinion on it, people have been discussing issues in the KOS duology with ableist ideals. This mini series was no way indicative of the entire disabled experience, nor does it represent my entire view on the representation as a whole. These things need to be met critically in our community, and talked about with disabled voices at the forefront. For example, the limited perspective we get of Wylan and Kaz being both white men, does not account for a large portion of the disabled community and the intersection of multiple identities.

All-in-all, Critique media, but do not forget to also critique fandom spaces. Alternatively, just shut the fuck up :)

happy fucking disability pride month, ig

[zachsreaderinserts]

dream, sapnap, and c!technoblade x abused! reader

what better way to unpack my twauma then by making it into a headcannons list? i’ll see myself out

wc: 1,146

DREAM

this motherfucker right here, your honor, will go absolutely batshit insane

how fucking dare someone hurt you? like, to him, you’re his world and then some. the idea of someone hurting you physically, mentally, or any kind of -ly, will make him go feral

of course, he’ll keep it in at first. if you came to him with this around the start of the relationship, he’ll respect that boundary. he doesn’t want to scare you away, after all

if you’re anything like me, you’ll probably be in tears telling him this. reliving something so traumatic and horrible, something so painful, is hard to do and retelling it would always make you cry, no matter how long ago it happened

seeing this, dream would probably grab you and hold you close, tucking your head into his chest. he can’t say he’s the best at comforting people, but he really does try. he would rub your back and whisper words of encouragement

it didn’t really click until one time when you two were playing minecraft on your shared console together. you had just successfully beaten the wither in your survival world and dream decided it would be sick to high five you.

turning in your direction, he raised a hand and watched in horror as you sucked in a sharp breath and flinched away from him.

he dropped his hand instantly and backed up a little, face struck with disbelief. someone had hurt you that way. someone hit you and made you scared of simple hand movements.

it took him all but three seconds to be on top of you, apologizing at a rapid fire speed while cradling your face. he peppered kisses like it was his lifeline and made sure that when he was done, not a hint of fear was in your expression.

he may not be able to comprehend it at first, but once he does, he will make sure every moment is dedicated to showing you that he would never treat you like that.

and if he finds out who your old s/o was? lets just say that we’re gonna have a glimpse of smp!dream irl

SAPNAP

baby boy. the man, big teddy hunky himbo guy, will also get extremely pissed. unlike dream, he would express it outwardly.

he has a huge sense of loyalty to people who treat him great. you’re dating him, therefore he feels the need to find your ex and carve out the alphabet on their body with a knife.

he won’t do it, for obvious legal reasons, so he settles for aggressively making sure that you know you’re loveable. hugs, kisses on the face, kisses on the neck. sex. the whole nine yards.

he’s not one for using his words, bc his actions speak louder, so he settles for a tight squeeze of a hug after you told him what you’ve gone through. it’s what he feels like is the best thing he can do for you.

one morning, you’re feeling particularly sluggish and such. you’re busy making your breakfast of choice when sapnap walks in. he seems like a morning person, so the mans is bubbly.

he goes to mess up your hair but stops himself short when you practically bash your head into the cabinet to get away from him. out of instinct, an “i’m sorry” spills from your lips and you look close to tears as you say it.

he just stands there, brain catching up and making the connection between what you told him and your knee jerk reaction to a hand reaching out to you. and for a second, he looks furious.

not at you! never at you, no, no, no. he’s furious at your past ex and how much of a douchebag they were. how evil they had to be to be able to do something like this and make you terrified of friendly gestures

so sappigus grabs your wrist gently and tugs you until you arms length away from one another. instead of a kiss or a hug, he stares into your eyes and with a serious tone of voice, says

“i will never let anyone else hurt you like how they did. i promise.”

im tearing up just thinking about this BITCH WHERE IS MY FUCKING WORDS OF ENCOURAGEMENT--

sapnap feels your pain and will never go a day without reminding you of how much he is willing to do to ensure your safety. he will go into every day saying that he loves you and ends every night with a hug or railing the fuck out of you. your choice.

C! TECHNOBLADE

blood man. blood god. e man. e boy? e. yeah, he’ll kill something. 100% after you’ve told him, he’ll probably need a place to go take his anger out. that cow farm near l’manberg looking mighty sexy rn--

we all know that techno is probably one of the most loyal bitches in the smp. he has an unofficial claim over the people he loves and you’re included in that.

so the idea of someone meeting you before him and having the absolute gall to beat you like you mean nothing infuriates him.

whenever he’s cooled down, he’ll come back (covered in cow blood probably--) and will pull you into his lap and sit there, hunched over you as if he were protecting you from the world.

and you’d probably appreciate it, nuzzling back into his body. you feel safe in his arms and he feels safe knowing that you’re in his arms.

techno and you typically make potions together in your free time. you both just like to stare at the shimmery liquids and swirl them around. while he’s working on a potion of strength, he realizes that you have the blaze powder in front of you but you’re not longer using it.

when he reached over, all you could comprehend was that there was something moving near your face that slightly resembled a hand, and you just panic. you let out a small yelp-like sound and darted you head backwards, looking over frantically.

techno and you just stare at one another, your expression quickly morphing from fear to guilt at how horrified he looked. techno moved quickly and shoved aside the potion you were working on and kneeled in front of you.

the voices were going rapid fire in his brain as he pulled you into a hug and tucked your head into his neck, grounding you and reminding you that you’re fine. everything’s okay now that he’s here.

“i will never leave you if you want me to stay.”

he’d pull back and plant a kiss on your lips quickly before his smile turned a little less sweet and a little more murderous.

“so, what was your ex’s name again?”

there’s no cars in minecraft but you bet your ass he will somehow commit vehicular manslaughter.

[ronkeyroo]

Know what I think is both sad and hilarious? If Verstael hadn't set Ardyn on the path of vengeance as well as absorb Infrit's memories.....he could have been a 2,000 year old hottie just roaming the world with the expression of "i'm so done with this shit". Just this cocktail of depression and a slight lack of empathy with a dash of "fuck off".

Like, "Oh, YOU think you go it bad?! Yes, tell me how you were literally backstabbed back your own brother who also killed your fiance and then turned everyone your ever helped against you to the point they threw rocks and crap at you before being dragged off onto an island where you were left in total isolation for CENTURIES only to be rescued by this short little blond shit speaking gibberish who won't stop poking and proding you in the name of science and war?"

"Ummmm....."

"That's what I thought." The proceeds to just down a bottle of wine before going out to sleep in his car.

He'd be that cynical uncle who has ptsd, depression, and conspiracy theories. Which is ultimately sad and just horrible but like...can you imagine the dialog with other people?!? 😂 Just this whole attitude of, "Oh we're in an apocalypse? Shiiit, drink up and smoke 'em it you got 'em. This is going to be one hell of a ride."

ANON YOU ARE SO RIGHT IT MIGHT AS WELL BE CANON holy FUCK.

Dude his past hurt and resonated with me so fucking much, im still heartbroken. He's been through such unjust shit,,i want to give him everything from the life that was stolen from him to therapy and self care and the meanest- heart cleansing bj for real

i CRINGED SO BADLY when Verst' found him, tortured and alone, after all those years, and literally used Ardyn's pain against him like that. Like If i were Ardyn, i'd still be hot on revenge even if i wasnt manipulated into it, especially after the unforgivable shit somnus pulled out of his ass, but verstael just threw gasoline in those wounds man. Motherfucker literally used him as a weapon for his own gain and I wish someone better was there to find him first...Imagine the POTENTIAL, muah, delicious.

This HC of Ardyn you shared with me is SO well fleshed out and accurate to his character that i can see it ANIMATED and HEAR IT IN HIS VOICE HGGHFNF. Like imagine that half drunk, half spiteful chug of wine at the end of his rant followed by a tipsy head tilt and a dissatisfied, squinting glare before turning away with a "hmph". UGH i love him. I love him in any way. I love him when he's trash jesus and when hes hobo man. Its awful that he suffers in like most of those AU's but i will love him through it all ANYWAYS.

THANK YOU FOR SHARING THIS WONDERFUL BIT, I SHALL BE THINKING OF IT FOR TIME TO COME

[delilahfairchild]

hi request anon here im fine with it being without enemies to lover banter

writing prompts/tips requests are opened (ask box)

enemies to lovers prompts + dialogues

situation prompts

instead of the common "hero helped the villain become better while in a relationship" what about "hero and villain become lovers and take over the world together"

you give your enemy a small gift because they had saved your life. your enemy looks for a second before taking the gift and kisses your hand

unlike common lovers who gift each other cute flowers, chocolate, etc... you and your enemy have an "aggressive" taste in gifts: daggers that make the wound bleed more, necklaces/rings that contain poison, white roses painted in blood, etc...

we both go to a masquerade ball for a mission, without each other's knowledge. when i stepped in the room in my ball gown i immediately saw you looking at me from several feet and holy fuck you look good in your tux/gown

alternatively, you found a moment to discreetly pull me out of the room because you don't want me to be there with those dangerous and cunning people all around me

your enemy rescue you out of the burning building, but when you realized that your friends are still inside you do everything you can to get yourself out of their grip. you kick, you scream, you even threaten to kill your enemy right at the spot, but they would not let you go. when the building exploded and caught you off guard, you saw that your enemy was shielding you with their body (author's note: i know i am getting repetitive with the shielding thing but i just love this trope okay???)

i have you at knifepoint and i am talking about how you didn't take me seriously during our joint mission and you motherfucker is just smiling and complimenting my dress so i stab you and disappear please don't pull out the knife you idiot or you will bleed to death and i don't want you dead yet (@screnwriter i did it)

one of the evil guys has you in his sniper gun but you don't know it. before that guy kills you your enemy puts a bullet in his skull and you are like you bastard that guy was mine to kill

that night your enemy shows up on your doorstep after a nasty breakup. out of pity, you let them in to sleep on your couch. the next morning when you wake up you discover that they have eaten your leftovers pizza. that moment you want to wake that motherfucker up and tear their limbs to limbs

dialogue prompts

"what do you want to do?" "blow up [name's] car maybe? that bastard crashed my motorcycle last week" "okay let's go *takes the oil can*"

"you call that a gift??? for saving your life?? such a poor excuse of a gift my dear" "if you don't want it i will take it back thank you" "i have never said that give me the box *take the gift and kiss your palm*" "*blushes*"

"my love, i get you your favorite red roses" "thank you but why does it smell weird?" "oh, i painted it with [some bitch's name] blood. heard that she stole your gun yesterday" "*falls in love*"

"[enemy's name] you are starring" "it doesn't help that you look like a vicious goddess from hell in that dress, my dear"

"look i need you to leave this building immediately" "i can handle myself" "but those are dangerous people i already have this mission" "then what? it's not like you are not dangerous as fuck, and i am talking to you right now" "no you don't understand. one of them has a fucking bomb that can explode, so i need you to leave, right now"

"LET ME GO YOU BASTARD" "love, it's burning i can't get you go in there" "MY FRIENDS ARE STILL IN THERE I CAN'T LET THEM" *building explodes*

"if i were you, i would wait until a medic goes by to pull this out, so don't do this. it would be a shame to see you die easily like this, i would keep the fun of killing you for later"

"you literally STABBED me. COULDN'T YOU NOT???" "for the record you wouldn't shut your damn mouth, so that was well-deserved"

"you should have wait for it. i would have enjoyed killing him very slowly. "and risk having him killed you?"

*repeatedly hit your sleeping enemy's with a pillow* "that was for my pizza you motherfucker"

spoilers: your enemy did, in fact, survive the attack and as a cheeky ass they are they also pulled you into bed with them.

i had so much fun writing this and i may do a part 2 with nsfw content. i apologized again for not fulfilling your first request anon tell me if you want a different list 😭😭