#i know from fucking EXPERIENCE with your evilness sir

[a-lurking-fae]

Credits to @zealousgoldcollective for the ideaaa!!!

◇ SELKIE READER x BATFAM

◇ WORD COUNT ¡ — 2.0k

◇ SYNOPSIS ¡ — You were a halfling selkie - but due to the family's neglect, you have become one with the ocean.

Your mother was a beautiful selkie that had simply come to sunbathe — yet, how could she have ended up like this?

Bruce was travelling to Ireland to enjoy his vacation, walking on the beaches, and - there she was, in all her glory.

Your mother was humming a tune, sunbathing as she enjoyed the sea breeze, unaware of the man who had fallen in love with her at first sight. Her long locks flew gently, arranged by the wind lovingly, the sun shone on her skin — she was the epitome of beauty herself.

A beautiful stranger — she was truly. If Bruce had simply left, maybe your fate wouldn't have ended up like this. But he approached her, like a predator moves - his eyes never leaving his prey. She was a stranger, but she didn't have to be.

“A lovely afternoon to you, sir — ” by the gods, even her voice was beautiful. A tune that no words could ever hope to explain. The moment she had spoken, your mother had sealed her fate. “It truly is. Magnificence has finally gotten a meaning.”

The woman chuckled, “A poetic man — you are, dear sir. Might share some inspiration?” .

Her- she had become his beacon, his muse, his sun, the very being that he will forever tie himself into. Was this what his parents had told him? A love so strong — it can not ever be called love. So what was he feeling?

“I - uhh… it just comes naturally, sometimes it gets to you - it explains itself in words…” oh gosh, what the fuck was he talking about. But that didn't really matter, she was laughing. “Well, I hope I'll get to experience that too!”. Her laugh had started to cease, “Could I get your number?” Shit. Did that come out from his mouth?

“What's that?” She tilted her head in confusion, the humans that approached her always asked about this “number”. Bruce was also confused, but understood that some do not have the luxury of phones. But — he misunderstood why she didn't know what a number was. “Ah… never mind, will you still be here tomorrow?” Bruce asked her, well — he hopes she will.

“Hmm, I most likely will!” Well — wait, really?

From there, their interactions spiralled into something more, a spark - you could say. For your, mother this seemed like a revelation that not all humans are pure evil — but, Bruce? Well, his obsession worsened day-by-day. He craved for her touch, he needed her to be his. And finally, he soon figured out her secret.

She was a selkie — with further research, he figured out how to tie her to him. At the dead of night, he stole her pelt, hiding it away from her grasp.

She was devastated. She should have expected this. The tales of older selkie were all truths. How could she have been that naive? Bruce brought her to the manor. She met Richard Grayson, a son she never bore.

Your mother was crafty, she conceived you in the manor while she made her grand heist. She had figured out where her coat was. She was getting desperate, the ocean screamed at her to return. The rain's whispers — always so quiet - now have started to weeping noises. How could she? The ocean was her home, not here.

You may join her one day, among her own people, just not now, she swears she loves you. Amongst the sobs of the water around, your mother weeps at what might never be. Her baby, oh, her baby.

Her pup will be left to fend for herself until she can reach her. Your mother hopes she could whisk you away, but that human has trapped both of you here. And in a way, when she leaves — a part of her will be left behind in this cold — desolate structure.

‘Goodbye, my precious cub.’

She leaves, and you are left behind — wondering what it would be like to know the love of both your parents.

❀•°•═════ஓ๑♡๑ஓ═════•°•❀

Bruce had sent you abroad for senior high. Your siblings never really cared where you were. You had chosen Ireland — its infrastructure, history, and folklore screamed to you.

Everything was fascinating! You had read about selkies, which were kind creatures that sometimes assisted humans. You knew how most stories ended up with them getting taken advantage of. (You are unaware you were a result of the exact situation. How ironic.) You return to your Airbnb, opting to rest after classes.

At the dead of night, you trailed to the beach, you never realised you had walked all the way here! It was a good few kilometers from the bnb, how could you have not noticed?

You decided to enjoy the sea for a while, think about life? Sure, why not? A melodic tune enters your ear, words couldn't describe how beautiful it truly was. You follow the tune — entranced, you find a woman with long locks, singing away her heart. She spots you, and familiarity hits you — akin to a tidal wave, it sweeps you away. Leaving that feeling of being stranded on the shore. She runs to you, her sobs pulling your heart as well. And — “My pup, you have finally returned to my arms once more!” You weep along with her, you're not even sure that if she truly is your mother. Well, in the future you can deal with that problem!

The woman embraces you from midnight to the early rising of the sun. She tells you her story, and you are unsure. She senses the hesitation from you, after all, how could she not? You came from her womb, and she tells you your heritage. Your mother had started her own selkie family. You had half–siblings that enjoyed your presence. You weren't used to this. Your mother's husband, Liam, was surprisingly accepting of you. Watching you and your siblings from far away. His mother had a similar situation to his wife, Cahira — he was conceived by his mother after her escape a few millennia ago.

Liam protects you like his own pup. Wounds? Patched up. Need someone to talk to? A good listener is here. Boy problems? Need him to drown them? He loved you like a father. Liam saw you for you. Not because you were Cahira’s daughter, nor just a pity party — but because he genuinely thought of you as his pup.

Anytime you went swimming, they would all trail after you. You weren't a full selkie, and had a risk of dying since you weren't immortal like them. They showed you the wonders of the ocean. No matter how dark it ended up, they always knew how to find you. When graduation came around, they decided it was time to ask you —

“Join us, my child — ” Your mother randomly blurted out one day. “You can become a full selkie, and I truly wish to have you with us until the end of time.” She chose her words, knowing that you may decline their offer. “If I become a selkie, Bruce might hunt you down — again.” You rest your hand atop hers.

“I love you, all of them too. But — I do not want to risk your happiness over mine.” You hug her, burying your head unto her shoulders. This was nice, you imagine a place where it was only you and them. The cruel truth will always haunt you.

“You silly girl!” Liam hits your head in a chopping motion. “We would love to have you, and honestly? It is safer if you stay with us — away from that man.” Well —

“Not to mention the neglect you have been facing all these years, my dear — We love you so much, if he ever tries to break us up, I will go to the depths of the Otherworld and back to make sure you are with us.”

You don't notice the tears cascading down your face — it was only after Cahira had kissed them away. Did you finally realise.

Finally, after graduation, you had decided to become a full selkie.

❀•°•═════ஓ๑♡๑ஓ═════•°•❀

You returned to the manor, wishing to say goodbye to Alfred one last time. Your pelt was in your bag, although it would have been safer with your parents, an emergency might arise and you would need it.

Your room had been the same as before, the posters during junior high were still stuck up the walls. Alfred had told you to go downstairs since you would all eat together. You honestly had a bad feeling about this —

Laughter could be heard echoing against the manor walls, inside jokes ran rampant between them — you wished to return to your room. Your paradise in hell. Entering the dining room, you could feel the stares of all your siblings upon your figure. They pale in comparison to the little gremlins back home. (You didn't realise you had stopped calling the manor your home, have you?)

Silence was suffocating, and Bruce felt the awkwardness dawning on them. “So, how was Ireland (name)?” He shuffled with his collar, he came from another one of his charity events, and he was too tired to change. “It was lovely, the country is interesting.” You wanted to taunt him, let him know you were going somewhere kinder, you knew better than that.

The silence dragged on until dinner ended, it was the polar opposite with the Selkies. You truly missed them.Your days went on without a hitch, not much has truly changed. It was only a few days until you'd return to Ireland.

“You'll be staying in Gotham for college.” No! No fucking way! Did he seriously just say that shit? “I already made friends there, it's hard adjusting to another environment again and — ” Bruce sighs, he hadn't expected this, should he just let you be? “I want to spend time with, I — I regret all the things I haven't done with you. I want to become a father to you, I hope you'll give me that chance.”

You stormed out of his office, packing your bags in a haste, preparing your pelt carefully. For some reason, your siblings in the manor had all tried to spend time with you today. Richard attempted to get you to go with him to this restaurant that opened a few blocks away — you opted to run instead. Damian had dragged you to paint with him, he surprisingly didn't attack you during this process. Cassandra and Stephanie wanted to watch a movie with you, while Babs and Jason bought you ice cream. Duke joined you and Alfred in baking. Your plans I'm running away kept getting ruined. They used to patrol until dawn!

You felt a sense of urgency to return to the sea. You made up you mind and ran with your stuff, your flight had been booked, and a friend picking you up secretly. You searched your room for the hidden pelt — wait, where the fuck was it? Shit. Shit. Shit! You turned your room upside down and — nononono! You can't delay right now! “Are you looking for something, (name)?” It was Bruce, he had to have it. “I am, and I know you have it.” You'd glared at him.

“Have what exactly?” He was a bitch alright. “My pelt, Mr. Wayne.” Bruce was taken back by your cold tone. One he always used on you. “You will stay here and that is final.” He goes outside as he locks your door, chains clanking at his every move. You never knew that there were chains! “You will not leave me, no. This is your home, my dear. Dad is sorry.” Bruce walks away from your screams, he will burn your pelt soon. Until he is sure that it will not give you any harm.

You attempt to break the windows, but all the windows in the manor have been reinforced by Dick and Jason. A feeling of dread washes over you, as your selkie family senses something has gone awry.

•.:°❀×═════════×❀°:.•

Damn that was long lol —

[seokgyuu]

After your flawless job-interview, Seokmin hires you as the newest addition to his company. Just that, once you start, it seems like you’re not who you previously portrayed to be. Instead, he finds himself faced with mini-skirts, push-up bras and gawking co-workers, not to mention your absolute lack of work ethic. Obviously, he needs to fire you! Just that, when he tries to��� you simply don’t let him.

Pairing: Boss!Seokmin x Employee!F!Reader

Genre: Porn with the smallest bits of plot, workplace “romance”, Smut MDNI!

Warnings: Morally gray characters, Seokmin is obviously reader’s boss and shouldn’t be fucking her, power imbalance, reader gets objectified a lot, but she enjoys it, reader is… acting very dumb (on purpose), Smut warnings under the cut!

Word Count: 3.7k

A/N: Hi everyone!! welcome to this little work of… filth! Making my return with a Seokmin fic just felt right (also I just could not stop thinking about this). Please let me know what you think with a reply or a reblog, it would mean the world to me!! also a big thanks to @shadowkoo for making this AMAZING banner and to @bitchlessdino for beta-ing!!

tagging: @okiedokrie, @inkchwe, @shinysobi, @gyuhanniescarat, @haologram, @beomcoups @wongyuseokie, @the-boy-meets-evil, @multi-kpop-fanfics (just some of my fellow dk enjoyers)

Smut Warnings: oral (m receiving), face fucking, praise (good girl, etc.), degradation (whore, etc.), unprotected sex, titjob, breeding, usage of the word “Sir” in a sexual context, tell me if i missed anything!

His phone rings. The Harry Potter title music is playing, letting him know it’s his sister calling. He can’t pick up, or well, no, he can, considering his hands are free, but he probably shouldn’t.

Having talks with his employees about having to let them go is Seokmin’s least favorite thing about being the boss. He never wants anyone to feel like they weren’t good enough or couldn’t live up to any expectations, but sometimes… sometimes it was inevitable.

Like with you.

When you had first walked into your interview, you impressed him with your sharp tongue and your witty humor. Your resume looked perfect for the job, and your previous experience was exactly what he needed. He hired you the following week and deemed his decision a good one - until you showed up for your first day.

See, before anything else, Seokmin is simply just a man. A man with eyes and needs and desires.

The mini skirt barely covered your backside, showed off your legs and those perfect thighs you had hidden from sight before. Your dress shirt would have been fine for the office if only it wasn’t… half open. Or at least open enough to see your breasts almost falling out of your push-up bra.

He knew back then that he should say something. Tell you that this wasn’t appropriate to wear to work. But he didn’t. For the same reason, his mostly male staff began coming into work more punctually, more eagerly and stayed for even longer hours.

It was a mistake, he thinks now, not to say anything to you on your first day. Or any other day after that.

A mistake or the single best decision he had ever made.

Truth be told, he’d never called you into his office to discuss his decision to let you go if it was only about the clothes (or lack thereof) you wore to work. No, he was fine with the clothes, more than fine, actually, if you took just one look at the amount of tissues discarded in his office’s trash can.

But… you lacked certain skills he had thought you’d easily have, considering your previous jobs. You struggled doing, in his opinion, the most basic tasks, and more or less let the others do the work for you. The work he paid you to do. Instead, you sat at your desk all day and played Solitaire or scrolled on Instagram.

The two of you almost never interacted, mainly because he was scared to say the wrong thing or stare too long at your breasts he couldn’t stop thinking about anyway. When it did happen that he had to talk to you, it mostly went with him going back to his office with a raging boner and a guilty conscience.

One time, he brought back some prints from the copy room, only to find out you had been the one to print them. When he asked around the room and you were the one to raise your hand and get up from your chair he almost choked on his spit. You made your way over him, your tight dress hugging every single one of your curves, the slit in the side showing off where your stockings began, the neckline down far enough for him to see the lacy material of your bra once again.

“Thank you, Mr. Lee, Sir,” you smiled at him, your fingers touching his when you reached for the pile of papers. He felt like you shot him and as a result, he shot a huge load of cum into one of his tissues when he was back in his office.

Then, he met you at the coffee maker one time, witnessing you eat a fucking banana in one god damned bite. He couldn’t believe his eyes when you basically deepthroated the fruit all while looking directly into his eyes. He popped a boner right then and there.

All in all, it was safe to say the woman he had met in the interview was gone and he had absolutely no clue why or how he had let you fool him that day you met.

A part of him was angry at himself for letting it get this far, but he couldn’t deny that with every glimpse of your exposed ass and tits, with every encounter like the prints or the banana, he decided to give you one last chance to prove yourself. So far he had given you about 151 chances and you’d screwed up all of them.

Which is how he ended up calling you into his office.

Which is how you ended up sitting in front of his desk on one of the comfortable dark red armchairs, your legs crossed, yet another mini-skirt rising up far enough for Seokmin to at least imagine he can smell you. The shirt you were wearing was tight and cropped and your blazer was lazily hung over the back of the armchair.

“So, Y/N,” he began, shifting on his seat and trying very hard not to look at your tits, “do you have any idea why I called you in here?”

You shook your head no.

“No, sir, I don’t. Did I do something wrong?”

Sir. Oh good lord, Seokmin had to swallow down the pathetic moan he feels creeping up his throat.

“Well,” he cleared his throat, “I have noticed that you’ve been handing your work off to Chan a lot. Soonyoung as well, and while I understand you’re the newest employee, you have been here for almost five months now, Y/N, and I did expect you to already, you know, do at least a certain amount of work by yourself.”

Your eyes widened the more he spoke, your pout prominent once he finished.

“I’m sorry, Sir, truly! They always offered to help me and I just- I just didn’t want to disappoint them,” your voice strained, almost sounding like you were about to start crying. Seokmin felt his heart speed up.

“I understand that. But still - it must make sense to you that-,”

You jumping up from your chair made him stop mid sentence. He watched how you stalked over to him, your big eyes staring him down with something he couldn’t pinpoint even if he tried.

“It does make sense, Sir, and I want to apologize. I can do better, please don’t fire me.”

Seokmin was frozen in his chair, his seated figure looking up at you, almost panicking when he realized how close you were. If he raised his hand now, he could touch your thigh, could let it slip higher, could-

“Please, Mr. Lee, I’d do anything to keep this job.”

Which is how we get to… now.

His phone is still ringing on the desk, but he’s still nowhere near answering it. He is too focused on your mouth around his rock-hard cock, on the way you look up at him with watery eyes, on the way your hand is fondling his aching balls.

You dropping to your knees might have been the single most hottest thing he has ever seen before. Or well, maybe this right now tops it. Your tongue is flat against his shaft, dragging it along his veins, licking up all the precum that doesn’t directly land in your mouth. You suck on his tip, tease his slit, and moan when you take him all the way.

And Seokmin? He thinks he might have just entered heaven. His hands are itching to touch you, to push you down and fuck up, to lose control, but he doesn’t. Instead, he watches you with his mouth dropped, with his heart going at triple speed in his chest.

This is wrong. So, so wrong! He shouldn’t let you suck his cock as a way to keep your job, for god’s sake!

Once his tip crashes against the back of your throat, his mind goes blank, and all the thoughts from before disappear. They make room for new thoughts instead, thoughts that finally allow him to do what he wanted to from the second you had walked in on your first day.

The groan he lets out causes you to drip into your panties. And the way his hands now find the back of your head almost makes you come. Your eyes roll back for a second, before you bring them back to look at your boss.

Your extremely hot, perfect boss who took so fucking long to bring you into his office. Who could not take a hint at-fucking-all.

He begins to thrust up into your throat, letting out moans you wish you could record and replay as many times as you wished. His cock is big, just as big as you had hoped it to be. He’s veiny and perfect and his angry red tip is going to become your favorite thing to suck on. He tastes salty and sweet and bitter at the same time, melts on your tongue, and gets you to clench around absolutely nothing.

“Fuck,” he cries out when he picks up his speed, nails digging into your scalp as he continues his hard and fast thrusts, his cock beginning to twitch, his balls tightening dangerously. You need him, want him and almost demand him to come down your throat. To give you everything he has to offer. You press your tongue harder against his shaft, cheeks hollowed out, and you can feel his orgasm nearing with every passing second.

“I’m gonna- fu-fuck, I’m gonna c-come!” His cry is almost taking you over the edge too.

Seokmin sees red and white at the same time, opens his eyes, and stares down at you with his pupils blown and his cock finally emptying his seed inside your awaiting mouth. It almost breaks him, seeing how you swallow all of his cum like a pro, never breaking eye contact.

Breathless, Seokmin slowly gets down from his high, watching how you lick up his cock, your eyes twinkling with mischief, giving his tip a small kiss before finally leaning back, batting your eyelashes.

“So tasty, Mr. Lee. Now, should I get back to work?”

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

It kind of becomes a thing. At the beginning, Seokmin calls you into his office and you suck his cock, make him come, go back to work. All while still wearing your skimpy outfits to work and doing the minimum requirements to not be a complete waste of Seokmin’s money. Even though he figures with a cold shiver running down his spine, it seems like he’s paying you for something totally different now.

You’re enjoying this to the fullest, having a right out blast. Not just because you get to have Seokmin fuck your throat every other day, no, but because of how he looks at you. When you met him that first day at the interview, you already knew you wanted him. Knew he was going to be your next little project. So far you had never failed, and you sure as hell weren’t going to start now.

Working at the company for five months hadn’t exactly been your plan, though. Five months until he finally called you into his office. Five months of you choosing the most outrageous outfits, knowing every single man in that office wanted a taste of you, but only wanting one of them to actually act on it.

“Holy fucking hell, yeah, just- just like that,” he’s leaning against the wall behind his desk, you back on your knees, his cock hitting the soft inside of your cheek over and over again. He’s holding onto your hair with one hand while the other is pressed against the wall next to him. You lick and suck and fuck his cock against your cheek, drool running down your chin. You’re painfully wet, throbbing, and needing him to finally put his cock in you.

By now (3 weeks after your little blowjob-job started) you know his tells, can sense when he’s about to come. So, when you hear that first little noise, you let go of his cock with a plop and get up. Seokmin’s eyes open and he looks at you, visibly confused.

“Wha-,” he begins, but you just take a step forward and crush your lips against his, your hands grabbing his face.

For the first few seconds, Seokmin doesn’t really grasp the situation. You’re kissing him. He begins to melt, his hands somehow finding their way to your waist and when you lead him back, suddenly seated on his desk, his mind goes blank. You want him to fuck you. Want his cock to go inside that probably sweet tasting pussy of yours. He moans into your mouth.

“Take me, Mr. Lee, please, need your cock in me, need you to fuck me,” you whisper into his ear, biting his earlobe after and sighing in relief when he immediately moves to get your panties off of you.

“Fuck, fuck, you’re so hot.” He kisses you again, wild and uncontrolled, your panties now landing on the floor. You part your legs and grab his cock, bringing it to your awaiting entrance. There is no stopping the moan that escapes you once his tip slips in, your teeth sinking into his bottom lip harshly. He licks over your teeth, feels his mind fog up, no thoughts just you, you, you.

Then, he’s fully inside of you. Twitches, groans, kisses you harder. And fucks you like a god-damned beast.

The pace he sets is brutal and you’re lucky it’s after hours so no one is at the office anymore. They for sure would have heard the way the desk is bouncing against the floor with every thrust as well as your high pitched moans, and Seokmin’s low growls.

He fucks you like he owns you and you live for it. His cock drags along your walls, fills you like he was made for you, hits your sweet spot over and over again as if he’d done this thousand times before.

“Fuck, yes!” You basically scream, your body falling backward, only his strong hands holding you up as he speeds up once more.

“God, shit, how are you so tight, baby?” He moves to kiss your neck, licks over the salty skin, revels in your taste, in the way you shiver under his touch. You wanna scream and cry and mark his body with your mouth and nails - and so you begin to pull on the hem of his shirt, which he gladly helps you to take off completely.

He’s built like a god. Wide shoulders, bulked up arms, abs like they were painted on. You let your nails drag over his torso, finally sliding them to his strong, muscular back. When he pushes into you even more, his lips not getting enough of your own, you dig into his flesh and hear him hiss. Still, he doesn’t stop. If anything, he goes even harder. Fucks you til you scream his name while experiencing the most intense orgasm of your life, milking his cock of all he had, cum filling your pussy to the brim.

After that it spirals.

He fucks you every chance he gets. He is addicted to you and your pussy. Whenever he needs you, he gets to have you.

He bends you over his desk during work hours, drilling into your pussy like a mad man while pressing his hand over your mouth to make sure no one notices. He comes inside you and stuffs it all back in there with his fingers, pulls your panties back up and sends you out to continue your work day as before.

When lunch time comes around, you meet him in the building’s cafeteria and he drags you to the nearest supply closet to fuck your mouth and then your cunt, telling you what a good little slut you are and how well you always take him.

He sends you pictures of his hard cock after work, begging you to come to his place and bounce on him - but you never do. It’s a game for both of you. No fucking outside of work, no dates or anything like that. He gets to keep fucking you and you get to keep your job - easy as that.

Just that… you’re not really bad at your job. Seokmin is slow to figure that one out, you realize.

When your seventh month at the company begins, he is so focused on getting his cock inside of you, he doesn’t even notice you’ve stopped handing off your assignments to your colleagues. You’ve actually grown quite fond of this job and the team - and Seokmin for that matter. Not that you want to admit that to him, or confess that you’ve been playing this part of the dumb girl with the slutty outfits simply to get his attention.

“I love when you get to the office with no panties on, gods, you’re a dirty little whore.” Seokmin’s hands are on your ass while you bounce on his cock. He’s sitting on his desk chair, admiring the view of your tits as you fuck yourself on his cock. His dirty words make your pussy flutter around him and you whimper, your hands braced on his shoulders.

“Mhmm, only a whore for you, Mr. Lee,” you moan, biting down on your lip. There is no chance you’ll ever grow tired of seeing the way he looks at you when you fuck. His hooded eyes, his red lips dropped open. His cheeks flushed and his hair a mess.

You enjoy being on top, enjoy watching him watch you, setting your own pace until he can’t hold back any longer and wraps his arm around your waist, pushing you down so he can fuck into you at his desired speed.

“That’s right, you’re my whore, your pussy belongs only to me.” He squeezes your ass cheeks and moans when you clench around him again, thrusting his hips up once. You can tell he’s about to lose control, about to hold you down and fuck you senseless. There is nothing quite as hot as Seokmin losing his composure.

Just two days ago, you teased him by being flirty with Soonyoung all day. Seokmin had not thought of himself as possessive, but somehow when it came to you…

Safe to say, he fucked you against his office door two minutes after your last encounter with Soonyoung, simply shoving up your skirt and ripping off your panties, his cock deeply buried inside of you the next second. He fucked you so hard you couldn’t properly walk even the day after.

“Yes, Mr. Lee, my pussy belongs to you, I am yours, Sir.”

You bounce on his cock quicker now, throwing your head back when his hands move to your breasts, taking them both into his hands and cradling them. His fingers press onto your nipples, squeezing them between his thumb and forefinger, pinching and teasing you. With every touch of his, you feel yourself nearing your high.

“You’re so beautiful, always so good for me, isn’t that right?” He breathes out, licking his lips as his eyes are glued to the way your tits look between his hands.

He fucked them a few days ago, your tits. Had you kneeling between his legs, squeezing them together as he fucked his cock between them with the lube he now stored in his bottom drawer. They had felt amazing around him, but nothing compared to your cunt, to its warmth, to its tightness.

“Oh- oh! I’m- I’m gonna come, Mr. Lee! Please, can I come?!” Your orgasm is so close, is ready to crash down on you and when Seokmin moaned out a yes, you let it happen. Waves and waves of pleasure erupt in your body and make you fall forward against his chest, his hips now beginning to thrust up, his moans turning more and more desperate.

“Good girl, such a good girl, fuck- I’m gonna fill you up, yeah? Fill you up with my cum, breed you like my own personal whore, hm?”

Your nails dig into his skin desperately as he fucks you fast and hard, his right arm now around your waist, pressing you down while he uses you for his pleasure, crying out your name when he comes - white hot cum landing inside your spent pussy, painting it the colours of his affection for you.

Seokmin fucks both of you through your orgasms, whispering sweet nothings into your ear, kissing your lips passionately when his hips still. You kiss him back, arms wrapping around his neck, your high still present in your bones.

“You’re perfect,” Seokmin mumbles against your lips and you smile, kissing him again, fingers brushing through his hair.

For a while, you make-out just like that, him still safely buried inside of you, some bits of your combined releases dripping down onto his chair.

Only when Seokmin’s phone rings do the two of you part. You give his cheek a small kiss before climbing off his lap and looking for your underwear, all while you put your dress back into its place. Your boss watches you, wishes he could just do this all over again instead of answering his phone. Reluctantly, he takes the call and watches how you wave at him, panties back on and clothes and shoes back where they belong. He waves back, greeting the business partner on the other line.

And when you leave his office and close the door behind you, when none of your co-workers even pay you any mind, you realize that maybe you like to keep it this way for just a little while longer.

[mad-hatter-memes]

FunkyFrogBait Starters

A collection of dialogue prompts from the videos by FunkyFrogBait. Feel free to edit quotes as necessary.

TW: Swearing, threats, and suggestive references

"My fellow Caucasians astound us with their ingenuity yet again..."

"This is just an evil, evil thing to do with pasta..."

"No spaghetti for you, sir."

"I could be doing any number of things with my life, but I've chosen to share this moment with you...Don't you feel so special?"

"This feels very forbidden..."

"I don't know what this is but it's not fettucine!"

"I just scalded myself! That was uncomfortable..."

"To be clear...I would not feed this to a dog..."

"This esophagus is rated E for everything!"

"Aren't I a lucky little boy? Only 40% of these are broken!"

"Is this a complaint that I'm hearing? Spitters are quitters, [Name]."

"It's just you and me, [Name]. So...who's gonna union with you?"

"If there is a god, he has abandoned us for celestial milk and cigarettes."

"That looks like something that would leak out of an infected wound!"

"This looks like porridge was spilled on the floor of a gym locker room and left to ferment for forty days and forty nights!"

"Trying to boil Pringles to make mashed potatoes is like trying to send her flowers after she's already taken the kids."

"Hahahaha, that's really cute, how about you go fuck yourself?!"

"Being a dad seems pretty fun; All you have to do is sometimes remember their names and forget to pick them up from soccer practice. "

"Now, now, don't be hysterical, dear. This is a nearly painless procedure...For me anyways!"

"I have not been allowed around a glue gun since...The incident..."

"The caveman method usually works in my experience."

"Aw babe, your texture makes me wanna barf."

"Now the nice thing about turkey bacon is that you can eat it raw! I think..."

"This says it serves twenty four people...They haven't met me."

"Hello, Mr. [Last Name]. I'm here to pick up your daughter."

"Please don't call the police...I know this a weird use of my free time but it's technically not illegal."

"I'm about to give myself an accidental haircut..."

"Can I just call up a priest and have him waterboard me...?"

"Whoookay...This makes me want to join a nunnery."

"Who up praying with they rosary right now?"

"STOP FINGERING EVERYTHING! I AM A CHILD OF GOD!"

"Girl, what foundation is that?! Not a pore in sight!"

"[Name], honey. You're already slaying, you don't need to slay innocent civilians."

"Where did they find this child? The Victorian Era?!"

"ASAB: Assigned Sidekick at Birth. How unfortunate..."

"Who is giving these children access to deadly weapons?! Hello?!"

"The kids like thirteen. Just throw a Roblox gift card as hard as you can and run in the opposite direction."

"[Character Name] is dead, [Muse Name]! And you're worried about the fidelity of this game to it's source material?!"

"Paint a picture for us, [Name]! Don't hold back!"

"I would've bully the fuck outta this kid. And I did musical theater!"

"Where are people getting all this Tannerite?! I want some!"

"Is the cockroach infestation required or optional?"

"I'm being manipulated by a gothic aesthetic and common sense!"

"Yikes! Don't show that to your grandma!"

"That's my heart after the hot girl in my Com Sci class tells me that our star signs are incompatible!"

"I really wouldn't talk how other people look if your eyebrows can't agree on what timezone they're in."

"Is god really rockin' with you? Sinner..."

"Let me eat my oreos in peace goddamnit!"

"I'M GONNA START POWERWASHING THE CEILING!"

"You know what crybaby fumblefingers? At this point you owe me money. Hand over twenty, pretty boy!

"Why is she beckoning me ominously...?"

"That's because you've been selected for ritual sacrifice, [Name]. You know how they are this time of the month..."

"Do you have family, [Name]? Anyone you'd be particularly devastated to lose in a violent and sudden way?"

"You know what, [Name]? I'd probably punch you over a Hot Wheels too!"

"I see god's law not as a restriction...but a challenge!"

"I am deeply dissatisfied with my life choices and I am NOT afraid to make that your problem at five o' clock in the morning!"

"I hope one of your family members is in a car accident this week!"

"It's fucking terrible and I'm overcome by a desire to kill James Corden for some reason!"

"I'm sorry...Do you think mother earth is just lactating blue raspberry surprise, bitch?!"

[thegoodwitchsworld]

I have a request for Daddy Ari👀

Reader and Ari have a dom/sub relationship but she’s got Ari whipped and wrapped around your finger and Ari proves to reader that he belongs to her just as much as she belongs to him

INNOCENT

Warnings- Dark, Ari x Y/N, ddlg dynamics, 18+ obviously.

A/N - Anon I bet you will be surprised by the turn this one took. Let me know how much you hate it on a scale of 1-10 lol. P.S- I am so fucking bad at writing intimate scenes because of zero experience, so sorry for the shitty smut :/ Bear with me though, I will eventually get better I promise :)

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Ari winced when Curtis barged in the door, protectively tightening his hold around her waist.

"Sir you need to-" Curtis began, immediately drawling off when Ari glared at him.

"Can't you see she's sleeping?" He hissed at him angrily, before looking down in his lap to where Y/N was asleep, her small hand fisted on his chest, her lips slightly parted as she breathed in and out softly. His expression softened for a moment, then hardened again when Curtis cleared his throat.

"I'm sorry sir," He continued in a softer voice. "But I think you should see this."

He handed Ari the day's newspaper. Ari frowned as he read the headline. He looked back at Curtis with arched eyebrows.

"WE did this?"

"No sir," Curtis replied quietly. "That's the problem. We didn't. It's more likely some other enemy of Rumlow. Maybe Lloyd or Rogers."

Ari nodded thoughtfully.

"Position the men like we discussed. And close the door when you leave. Softly."

Ari didn't see the slight smirk on Curtis' face over his boss being so completely in love with his girl. Everybody who knew Ari knew that he was completely whipped for her. The day she came into his life was the day Ari changed completely.

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"Sir, there's a girl here," Curtis told his boss, who was busy with a client in the middle of the empty diner. Ari looked just as confused as the first man.

"Girl? What girl?"

"She says she was looking for some place to eat but everywhere else is closed because it's 2 AM." Curtis shrugged. "Should I bring her in?"

Ari looked across the table at Barnes, who smirked and shrugged too.

"Bring her in," he told Curtis.

Ari didn't know what he was expecting, but it was definitely not this. The girl walked up shyly to him, stopping a couple feet away from his table. She looked terrified, her hands clutching at her tiny blush pink ruffled skirt. Her eyes met his, and he took a sharp breath. They were the biggest, prettiest doe eyes he had ever seen. Curtis nudged her gently towards him, making her stumble before Ari caught her at the waist.

He looked at her before smiling softly.

"You're new around here sweetheart?"

She nodded vigorously, her eyebrows scrunched up in obvious panic.

"I-I am just a student sir- I had my midterms and I was studying at the library and i felt hungry and everywhere else was closed except this diner and -"

She rambled off quickly as Ari shushed her gently.

"That's okay sweetheart, we can get you something to eat. Would you like that?" He asked her, gently stroking her cheek. She was so small, even when he was sitting she was hardly any bigger. Her lips pouted a little and she frowned.

"I told your men the same thing but they didn't listen!" She complained, as if this was a playground and his men had stolen her toys. Ari had to bite his cheek to stop himself from laughing at her expression.

"I'm sorry sweetheart, my men can be...a little dense sometimes," he responded, pulling her into the booth next to him. He didn't miss the side-eye Curtis had given him, or the eyerolls from his two bodyguards.

Since that day Ari simply lived for Y/N.

Right now she was asleep in his lap while he worked. Ari kissed the top of her forehead and went back to his papers.

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The thing Ari cherished the most in Y/N was her innocence. She had a childlike demeanour about her that always made Ari grateful, especially when he was surrounded by bloodshed and evil. Since she came into his life, he had grown extra cautious, not daring to leave any stone unturned to keep her safe. She did have a tendency to throw tantrums by stamping her foot every time he told her no to something, which wasn't very often considering she simply retorted to using her best puppy eyes on him. Ari didn't mind being manipulated by his doll, however. She was extremely stubborn, but he would give her his life if she ever asked.

So Ari was very surprised when she walked into his office and demanded that he show her the business and "let her help".

"But daddy I wanna help!" She whined, pouting so prettily, her long eyelashes fluttering. Ari had to inhale deeply to calm down his heart and his er... dick.

He squished her cheeks between his fingers, kissing her glossy lips.

"Little girls don't get involved in such dark stuff, baby," he told her patiently. Where was this even coming from? What new show did she watch?

"But I wanna learn how to shoot and kill! All the hot girls do it in the movies daddy pleaseeee I wanna be hot too!" Y/N continued to beg, making Ari laugh as he gathered her in his arms, kissing her nose.

"Oh baby you're adorable. I love you so much. But no, you're not going within ten feet of a gun or a knife. That's daddy's orders." He told her firmly, even as his hands roamed all over her satin-clad body. "And you're so, so hot I promise you, " he added as an afterthought.

Y/n bit her lip with a sly smile on her face as she stroked his beard, her lips ghosting over his jawline.

"Can I do something to change your mind daddy?" She asked softly, making him groan.

"Oh baby," he manipulated her body to make her sit astride on his lap. His hands slid under the small bralette she was wearing, making her moan softly when his calloused thumbs stroked her already hardened nipples.

"Daddy's so fucked baby," he whispered, his forehead against hers before her lips caught his, teasing him even more when she bit and nibbled on them, giggling when he dragged her clothed pussy over his hardening bulge.

Her fingers played with the chain around his neck, her head pulling away when he tried to get another kiss.

Ari growled threateningly, his hand gripping her hip so hard he was sure it would leave bruises on her soft skin.

"Don't play with daddy baby, please," He whispered softly, and she giggled again, her soft laughter bouncing across his office walls.

"Say please, daddy, she told him playfully, laughing as he nipped at her collarbone.

Ari knew she knew he could subdue her and have her the way he wanted in a single second if he liked. It was not even a question. But this was just what he loved, letting her think she had the upper hand before she was reduced to a broken, babbling, beautiful mess in his arms. So he continued to let his baby girl toy with him.

"Please," he nudged her nose with his, "baby, let daddy kiss his pretty girl."

She pretended to think about it for a second, then shrugged.

"Okay."

She shrieked as Ari's lips smothered hers in a rough, wild kiss. Her fingers played with his hard jawline and the skin on his neck and shoulders, his growls mixing with her soft giggles as he continued to kiss her possessively like a man starved. He carried her over to their bed, gently laying her down as he continued his kisses all over her body.

"I love you so much Princess," he told her between kisses.

"I love you too daddy Ah-!"

Ari had dragged her underwear aside and pushed a thick finger inside her, making her yelp in surprise. He hummed in approval.

"So wet- all this for me baby?" he asked her, and she smiled coyly.

"Only yours daddy, I'm only yours".

He slapped her pussy once, before taking off his sweats, letting his cock free, slapping his stomach. He leaned over her, her eyes bright with mischief and lust. His lips found her neck, her shoulders, her now-bare chest as he slowly pushed inside her, making both of them sigh in relief as the feeling settled in.

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She stirred in his arms, yawning as she sleepily raised her head from his chest.

"Did you handle it daddy?" She asked sweetly, innocently. Her eyes still wide, her lips still pouty.

Ari smiled and smoothed her hair back from her face, his thumb rubbing her lower lip softly.

"Yes I did my love," He kissed her nose.

"But please, try not to kill a real man next time you want to look hot like Scarlet Johansson".

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Ari stared at the scene in front of him in his office, his mouth wide open. He had just gone out of the meeting with Rumlow to sort something out with Curtis, and when he returned he had found her there, on the floor, her legs widened and underwear visible, in her favorite satin lingerie. She was supposed to be asleep! She kneeled over Rumlow, as she twirled the knife blade around in her tiny hand. Ari didn't understand how his brain could still find her so cute and beautiful, her painted nails glinting in the moonlight.

She swirled her finger in the blood pouring from Rumlow's wound down on the floor, bringing it up to her face before licking it slowly. \

"Y/n", He whispered, making her swirl around on her knees, her eyes wide as her finger froze inside her mouth.

"What are you doing baby?" He could barely raise his voice, horror etched in his eyes as he watched his innocent baby girl suck on the blood of his business partner.

"Oh hi daddy!" She chirped cheerfully, extending her finger toward him.

"Want a taste?"

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She giggled as if Ari had made a joke, instead of talking about the murder of a man. After he got over his initial shock, he had helped clean up the evidence, putting Rumlow's body in a black bag before disposing of it himself. It had taken both of them a very long time to get the blood out of the carpet, and she had felt the adrenaline rushing through her, making her chatter constantly. It was only after they had cleaned everything at 2 AM that Ari had told Peter to run to the Newspaper office with the front headline for tomorrow-

"New York's biggest crimelord Rumlow killed under mysterious circumstances".

She had finally fallen asleep in his arms then, exhausted from her little adventure, him refusing to let her go to sleep alone. He of course couldn't rest before this was all settled. Even in the mob business you couldn't just go around murdering people in cold blood. If anyone came to know what his girl had done, it wouldn't be long before everything came crashing down on them and everyone around them.

Ari stroked her cheek in gentle adoration.

"Tell me though, baby, why did you really kill him?" He asked her softly.

She shrugged.

"Oh I don't know daddy, I was feeling bored! And he was just sitting there, and I just did it!"

"And anyway," She continued.

"You didn't teach me how to kill so I learned on my own. You know how I always get what I want, daddy," She smiled brightly at him.

Ari sighed, resting his forehead against hers.

He was SO fucked.

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(I have dreamt about murdering someone since I was 14 lol and got the idea of "knife-strapped-to-your-thigh-in-a-pretty-dress-aesthetic lol).

[storiesavenged]

experiment 03

bruce banner x enhanced!reader

~ wherein reader is enhanced with cryokinesis (ice powers) in a hydra lab and bruce saves them while on a mission.

~ masterlist | part 2

!! trigger warnings !!

• abuse

• ptsd

authors note ;; cryokinesis is basically like being elsa :P reader can manipulate ice to make weapons/attack or create things with. reader is adressed as three until later on.

you couldn't remember the last time you ate, or the last time you had a long, peaceful sleep. hydra had been working you like a dog, harnessing your cryokinesis- given to you by them of course- for their own benefit. they wanted a weapon that could take down the avengers once and for all. you were always gaslighted into believing they were the evil ones. you were manipulated into doing their bidding, through punishment.

"get the fuck up three. don't make me hurt you." the hydra man spat. you had fallen to the floor from pure exhaustion as they were forcing you to use your powers way beyond what your body could handle. not to mention you hadn't been fed in a few days as you had "not been behaving".

"s-sir... i can't..." you winced, your body already trembling at the thought of what he'd do to you. it was the same every time, but regardless it never failed to horrify you.

the man scoffed.

"pathetic. i can't believe we haven't scrapped you already." he said under his breath, but you had heard it clear. you didn't cry. you couldn't, they had bled you dry for tears. you were numb to every horrible thing they ever said to you. suddenly you were roughly forced to stand and dragged over to your cell. tight metal chains attached securely to your wrists keeping you suspended in the air. you silently prayed like you did each time that someday you'd get out of here. then the punches came. your body jerked with each hit, almost instantly bruising up due to how thin you were. you weren't sure how long he abused you before a loud bang rippled through the basement walls. truthfully you weren't sure what the hell was happening. one minute you're being repeatedly beaten and scolded, the next there's gunshots and yelling. your vision was blurry but you could make out the figure of a man headed your direction.

"shit... i've got a captive down here, they need medical attention.." the man trailed off, his eyes scanning your body. before you knew it you were out of the cuffs and in his arms. you wanted to fight, you knew it was one of the avengers but you didn't have the energy. you simply let it happen, hoping they would be easier on you when they inevitably jailed you again and interrogated you about the operations of hydra. you hoped that it would all be over soon, as your vision went black.

your eyes slowly fluttered open, adjusting to the bright lights of the new place you were in. as you regained more of your conscience, you noticed you were in some sort of medical room. there was a man typing away at a computer across the room from you.

"s-sir...? where am i..." you croaked, attempting to get an idea of what was happening. were they just helping you? or were there ulterior motives?

"oh, you're awake! it's okay, you're in the avengers headquarters medical wing." he explained softly, attentive to how concerned you were.

"don't worry, we won't hurt you." he added, a soft smile adorning his features. you noticed his black, curly hair, and his purple button down underneath a white labcoat.

"o-okay.." you winced a little as you moved to sit yourself up, the man rushing to help.

"hey hey hey it's okay, i've got you." he said as he helped you position yourself more upright. he was so.. kind to you. you weren't sure why, you were convinced the avengers were the bad guys. you were taken out of your thoughts by the man clearing his throat.

"guess i should introduce myself. i'm doctor banner, though bruce is fine if you're more comfortable with that." banner smiled, you couldn't help but feel at ease when he smiled. it made you feel safe.

"i... don't know my name..." you spoke softly, ashamed of yourself. you were taken from an orphanage by hydra when you were just 8, but have no recollection of it. all you'd ever known is is hydra. and the name they had chosen for you was three.

"they call me three.." you added, not sure what else to say. you truly had no sense of self. you weren't allowed to build one.

"is that what you'd like to be called?" banner asked, wanting to make sure you were comfortable.

"i don't know... i-it's all i ever knew.." you admitted, truly unsure of what to think. but you really didn't mind being called three. at first it was a positive thing, a nickname if you will. there was a man at hydra that was nice to you all the time. he called you three affectionately, as before they would just call you experiment 03. you could feel a sense of warmth from his memory, his presence was the only safe one you had ever felt during your time in hydra.

"then we'll call you three. but let me know if you don't like it, i can understand why you wouldn't.." he trailed off, sadness in his eyes. did he feel bad for you?

"u-uhm.. sir-.. d..doctor banner...?" you asked timidly. whenever you didn't use formalities with those at hydra you were punished. it was always sir or ma'am. the fear was always there.

"yeah three?" he replied, moving to grab some instruments to draw blood.

"why... did you guys help me...? i... they... told me you all were bad..." you shook as he came nearer to you with the needle in his hands. your body moved away from it, eyes widening at your own reaction. the last time you tried avoiding hydra's serum injections you were hurt badly.

banner frowned, giving a knowing sigh.

"of course they told you that. well, simply put, you were in trouble. you obviously are not with them, you were taken. right? that's why you were locked up?" he asked, to which you nodded.

"it's our duty to help people; keep them safe. would have been a different story if you were with them, though." he grabbed some more supplies from off his desk, moving slowly towards you again.

"i need to draw some blood, is that okay? i just need to do some tests." he questioned, wanting to make sure you were comfortable. he saw the way you reacted to the needle. being an abuse victim himself he understood, and made sure to not cross any boundaries.

"o-okay..." you nodded timidly, giving him permission. you couldn't help the way your body flinched as the needle went in, and you could hear him make a noise of sadness, presumably about your history which was making you afraid. you almost hated how kind he was to you, your mind was convincing you it was just to get you to trust him so he could betray you later.

"i... i'm so sorry, three. no one deserves to be put through what you experienced..." he looked deep into your eyes, sadness radiating from his own. you searched his in return, feeling a sense of understanding. like he was truly empathetic with your situation. it made you wonder if he had been through a similar thing.

"it's.. it's okay-"

"no, it's not.. no one should treat another person like that..." you swore you saw his eyes flash green, but you chalked it up to you hallucinating, after all you didn't feel much pain so you knew you were on some pretty heavy pain medications.

"i mean.. look at you. no offense but, you're thin as a twig, all black and blue.." he scanned the parts of your body that weren't covered by a hospital gown, wincing at the scars on your pale skin. you shrunk in on yourself, feeling self conscious. you hadn't seen how you looked for a long time but you could only assume it was god awful the way banner looked at you with pity.

"i'm sorry.. but you definitely did not deserve any of this. don't tell yourself you did, okay?" banner urged, you just nodded, fighting a yawn but losing.

"here, get some rest. you've been through a lot today." he said as he helped you lay back down. you fell asleep rather quickly, as you were exhausted.

bruce pov ;;

i worked on analyzing the blood samples taken from three, the results showing me what i feared. i figured they were enhanced but i couldn't be certain without doing tests. one thing that concerned me was how cold three was. my mind wandered off, only being pulled out of my thoughts when someone entered. i turned to see tony standing in the doorframe, eyeing three curiously.

"so this is the kid you saved?" he inquired, moving closer to get a better look.

"yeah, they're resting right now. i feel... awful, tony." i admitted, feeling really emotional about the whole thing.

"how come? this is no different than other rescue missions, what's different about this one?" he asked, and truth be told i wasn't sure why i seemed so emotional about three. partly due to the fact i have been in their shoes for certain, but i don't quite know why else.

"i.. well i empathize with their situation. as you know i was.. well.." i trailed off, clearing my throat.

"this one is just... i can't place it tony. this is the most severe case we've had... and... they're enhanced."

"what? like wanda and cap?" his eyes were wider now, curious as to what the story was.

"i'd assume more like cap, they jolted when i pulled out a needle to draw blood for tests so i assume there's a needle thing there somewhere." i explained, my heart aching for three, wondering just how much they went through.

"what do we know about them?"

"well.. they said they didn't know if they had a name. they've been called three. so i've been calling them three, they don't seem to mind, might be familiar for them amidst all this change." tony nodded, urging me to continue.

"i.. didn't get much else from them. i didn't want to pry too much. but medically i know they are enhanced. i'm not sure what their power is. they are also cold to the touch. at first i thought it was because they were in a basement but it hasn't gotten any better since being here. i'm not sure what that's about." i explained, knowing the temperature thing was an odd detail but i thought tony might have some input.

he walked over to three, standing next to them to examine them. he stopped at their hands, picking one up and looking at it closely. i rolled my stool closer to look at what he was seeing, noticing three's fingertips were ice. how the hell had i not noticed that before??

"i think three here has cryokinesis. ice powers. that would explain them being cold and the ice fingertips. we've got ourselves an elsa." i had to stifle laughter at the joke he made. tony's always finding nicknames for the team.

"hey tony, do you think we should give them a name? you know like... an actual name and not just a number? i can't be certain they are truly happy being called three, surely it must take them right back there.." i rambled off, shaking my head at the thoughts now entering it.

"yeah, that sounds good. got any suggestions?"

"well.. no. i asked you because you're quick to have a nickname for everyone you meet. thought you'd come up with something better than i could." i said. he stroked his stubble covered chin with his fingers, humming softly.

"how about y/n?" he suggested with a shrug.

"i like that, it suits them. i'll let them know they can choose y/n or three when they wake." i smiled. i love the way y/n rolls off the tongue, and it really does suit them.

"well, i should get going. but let me know if you learn more, i'm interested about this one." he stated before making his way out of the room. i shook my head, knowing he probably has a plan for y/n.

you woke up later the next day feeling a lot better than before. the bruises on your body healing

"hey three! how're ya feeling?" he asked, you managed a small smile.

"better, i.. well i haven't had a good sleep in years..." you frowned once more, remembering the uncomfortable cot you slept on in your cell when hydra wasn't working you half to death. you recalled how you slept light since there was always a threat.

"i'm glad you slept well." he smiled, finishing what he was typing on his computer before rolling over to you on his stool.

"so, tony and i had a chat about things and we came up with an actual name for you."

"oh, what is it?" you quizzed, particularly interested to get an actual name.

"tony suggested y/n, i thought it really suited you but ultimately it's up to you if you like it or not." he explained, you loved the way the name rolled off his tongue.

"i.. i love it doctor banner.. i'll use it." you smiled softly, feeling happy they cared about you enough to offer you a real name.

"okay y/n. i'm really glad you like it." he grinned before pulling out a clipboard and clicking his pen.

"i have a few questions for you, is that alright? if you don't feel comfortable answering just let me know- some of these are questions tony had and i would be understanding if they are uncomfortable for you." he explained, looking into your eyes once more.

"okay... i-i'll try to answer as much as i can.." you could feel your hands trembling, intrusive thoughts filling your mind. what if they were just buttering you up to use you to get hydra intel? banner frowned, seeing you trailing off into your thoughts while your hands shook with fear. he couldn't even begin to imagine what they had done to you to make you so timid and afraid.

"alright. tell me everything you know about yourself." he prompted, getting ready to write your answers down.

"well.. i was taken by hydra at a young age.. given cryokinetic powers through injections. i would say i have excellent control of my abilities, there was never a moment i wasn't training them- but because of that i don't recognize when i've pushed myself too much." you explained, focusing on your breathing to keep yourself calm as you searched through all your other memories.

"i don't remember much of anything from my life before hydra. they also... told me..." you trailed off, hands trembling once more.

"what did they say?" banner asked, a worried look on his face now.

"they told me... to k-kill you all..." you started to panic a little, worried they would hurt you because you were supposed to kill them.

"n-not that i would want to s-sir.. i-i don't want to hurt you all i swear!! i-i'm not... i'm not with them..." your breathing picked up in pace rapidly, and soon you were in a full blown panic attack, ice covering the walls and ceiling due to your emotions being on high. this caused tony to book it down to where you were.

"what the hell is happening here?" his voice boomed as he ripped open the door, ice falling from it and onto the ground. he took one look at you, curled up and rocking back and forth, hyperventilating and his face softened now knowing you weren't turning against them. he rushed to your side along with banner and took your hands in his, shuddering at how cold they were.

"y/n listen to me, can you hear me? i need you to take deep breaths okay? we're not going to hurt you. you're safe here." he spoke calmly, rubbing your palms with his thumbs to try to bring you back to reality.

"breathe with us y/n, okay? i need you to take a deep breath in, ready?" banner instructed, getting a shaky nod from you he continued to lead you through deep breathing. as you calmed down the ice went away too, bringing the room's temperature back up and with it your own temperature.

"i.. 'm sorry... p-please believe me.. i don't work for them.. i don't want to k.. kill.." you whimpered, afraid of the mere thought of having to kill them especially after they'd been so nice to you. you tucked your knees into your chest, your forehead resting on them. tony looked at bruce, an eyebrow raised and confusion in his eyes.

"hydra told y/n we were the enemy, tony. they told them to kill us. i guess they realized they were supposed to and thought we'd hurt them for it.." banner sighed, explaining to tony why this had even happened in the first place.

"i see.. i believe you y/n. if you wanted to you would have tried by now." tony rested a hand gently on your shoulder. you looked up to see a smile on his face, sincerety written on his features. he knew trust had to be built before he would offer a place as an avenger to you. after all seeing your powers in motion convinced him all that much more you needed to be on the team.

"t-thank you sir... for believing me.. and helping me.." you gave a small smile, looking at both of them.

"you've got banner to thank for that one, y/n. he's the one that rescued you." he smirked at banner, he was a genius afterall so he knew banner felt something for you.

"doctor banner.. you were the one who..." you trailed off, your mind replaying the moment you were taken out of the hydra base that kept you away from the world for so long. your eyes widened as you realized it was bruce that helped you.

"i.. how can i ever repay you..?" you whispered, not even sure how you could possibly return the favour.

"oh, y/n please you don't have to repay me at all. i did what any one of us would have done. it's our duty, i really don't expect anything in return for doing my job." he smiled. something about his smile made you feel different- good different. maybe staying with the avengers wouldn't be so bad.

authors note ;; making this a series ^^ i really loved this idea and i think it called for a series anyway as it was a very open prompt. parts will be published at my own pace

masterlist

[henrysglock]

Why do you think so many current ST/byler theories have devolved to the point of delusion? Like, so many of these theories being put out now are more along the lines of “the phrasing of this one sentence/ looking to the left is obviously a reference to this one specific obscure movie from the early 70s that has nothing to do with the premise or themes of Stranger Things and has never been properly referenced in the show but it means that actually Will’s disappearance is really a reference to the little boy bomb in ww2 and so Lonnie is the secret true villain of the show and Will is the super specialist bean to ever special, something something byler endgame. Checkmate 🤓”.

Like, so many of the current theories are making wild reaches with nonsensical evidence and flimsy connections that don’t support the theorist’s conclusion and yet these “theorists” try to act like they’ve made a genius revelation and if you don’t believe their nonsense you’re somehow just dumb and willfully ignorant??? I’ve genuinely never seen another fandom with such weak and outright delusional theories being treated as obvious and factual by so many people.

Holy shit anon...fucking SPEAK!!! You're saying what 90% of us are thinking, I swear. Well. You're saying what the dedicated and grounded analysts are thinking, at least.

But to answer your question, it's a perfect storm of conditions: Dunning-Kreuger effect, content drought, echo chamber, confirmation bias, and the pervasive, consuming need to be right and special.

They've fallen in a black hole, Anon. They need to be right, but they don't have the humility to go "what if I'm not right?", which would "save" them in most cases. I know that's my go-to. I try to hold Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's words in mind: "When you have eliminated all which is impossible, then whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth". That means the burden is on the theorist to prove all the more-probable theories wrong. None of the folks you're talking about do that. They don't check themselves. They just pick a theory that makes Will the most specialest victim to ever victim and run with it...and they use misinformed takes about a very real mental disorder to do so, all while ignoring the actual, canonical appearances of said disorder.

Although, in their defense, I can't say I haven't referenced an obscure off-theme movie in my day (Pumaman, critically acclaimed "worst superhero movie ever", was on the ST4 board, and it actually has a surprising amount of similarities to ST4, escpecially re: El)...but in my experience it always comes down to genre.

They aren't drawing specific easter eggs from 20 different superhero movies or 20 different "alien experiment gone wrong" movies or 20 different time travel movies as individuals. When you watch the movies, you see that movies from the same genre offer the same references, even when they're not on the movie board. It's them saying "hey, we did our research on how xyz type of plot line is written because we're including that kind of plot line", not "we pulled this exact line from Pumaman at minute 57.13, and this specific reference from Who Framed Roger Rabbit at minute 12.49, and, and, and..."

That's why they appear to be referencing every movie ever: they're drawing on the plot beats of the genre. They appear to be referencing every changeling plot because there's a basic changeling plot line. There's the bones of a time travel plot. An alien experiment gone wrong. There are some specific movies that do get specifically referenced (like Changeling 1980, Terminator, Silence of the Lambs, etc), but the onus is on us to recognize the difference between a specific movie reference or a genre-common reference.

People also have to be wary of the "what common plots do they have as references...that they are planning to subvert?" For example: The Good Son—"evil" little boy who tries to kill his family so that he could do whatever he wants forever—which people used to say that our Henry was pure evil since childhood...even when the subtext of the show didn't support it. Lo and behold, in comes TFS to say that Henry was a really, really good kid in a bad situation. In comes the VR to tell us Henry loved his family and was utterly heartbroken by his mother trying to evict him from said family. <- All of which could be deduced from ST4 canon.

Another part of the issue, one that I've talked about since the dawn of time (2022) is going in with a theory and working to make all your evidence fit that theory...especially when you then try to make "evidence" out of things that are connected to other plots/disconnected from your theory. The confirmation bias will get you every time (especially with a theory like DID, which makes it really easy to get lost in the weeds in a really uninformed/pop-psychology way).

For example, taking all of the "Lonnie stealing baby Jesus from the nativity scene" bit in TFS and making it about Will...as if Patty isn't right there having been stolen as a baby. As if they don't have a running gag of her spooking Henry, him going "Jesus Christ!", and her responding "No, Patty Newby". As if they don't give Patty and Henry insane amounts of religious coding re: the Holy Trinity, which links both of them to the UD/Mindflayer, who also has stupid amounts of God/Heaven subtext baked into it. As if Henry doesn't have literal stigmata. As if changeling Patties in Henry's visions aren't the literal human mouthpiece of God the Mindflayer. As if Will was ANYWHERE in any of that! As if the Will references aren't reserved for Brenner?? But you never see them discuss that!

Alas, anon...It's clearly that Lonnie kidnapped Will to rape and kill him. And also Henry is an alter of Will. And Will is also the Demogorgon, who is also Lonnie, who "got" Will. Meaning Will got himself? So did Lonnie rape Will, causing his DID, or did Will, as the Lonniegorgon, rape...himself? And give himself DID?

Another fun instance, and this one was sent to me recently, was a theorist defining CATTLE only to completely abandon the definition.

Cattle are bovines. It's in the literal definition. But OP went for...sheep references? As if Billy isn't right there calling the Hawkins girls cows? William? Making a cow reference? <- Which was never mentioned by OP?

Regardless, sheep are not cattle! Sheep are livestock.

See: THE DEPT OF FUCKING AGRICULTURE

(x)

But no. No, whatever. Actually? This party never stops! Literacy is dead and words have no meaning! Existence is upside-down and the Willonniegoron reigns supreme! Welcome, one and all, TO BYLER TUMBLR!

[mothmans-wedding-photographer]

Mothman's Buffy Rewatch, Season 5, episodes 3 and 4, "The Replacement" and "Out of My Mind"

The Replacement

Yeahhh Xander needs a new place

"Take a break from the violence- oh fighting!"

"What's powering it- raw enthusiasm?"

Who is this guy

This realtor is so done immediately

Buffy and Riley 😭😭 guys

Anya girl

YEAHHH GILES

oh nvm

Hit bro over the head with a goddess of childbirth

Spike rummaging through the garbage like a Raccoon

I was half expecting Spike to be messing with them ngl

Xander gets cloned

I'm pretty sure this was made because Xander's actor has a twin irl

Man that was your last quarter 😭

Dawn is real for that

"It's so nice you've learned to share"

Creepy ass mannequin

Is he hypnotizing him with the quarter?

Girl how old are you?? He's like 19

Imagine if Willow did set the fire for him that would be hilarious

Xander Snoopy dance

"Or! It's Toth"

"Sometimes we all help to save you" 😭😭

"I handled it fine" LMAO

Girl has a list of life milestones

Tbh it would be scary to suddenly not be immortal and fifty years would see small in comparison

Pointing Spiderman meme

Actually a cool plot instead of just evil twin

Was not expecting Xander with the gun

"If Xander kills himself, he's dead"

Anya's face when Riley asked if she owned a gun

"Eleven and a half" "wrong. But see!"

So the nickel was a red herring

Toth makes his return

I forgot how green his teeth were

"Doesn't it make everyone want to lock them in seperate rooms and do experiments on them" SIR?

Anya wants a threesome with them both

Star Trek reference

"Let the spell be ended" well that was easy

"Why don't we just load her up like one of those little horses"

"But she doesn't love me" Uh? Where did he get that impression because she seems sickeningly in love with her

Out of My Mind

Business suit vampires

Spike enters the fray

"I got knitting needles he can borrow"

Seriously why do they keep him alive

"I will know your blood, slayer" okay man

Immediately falls into a grave

I just realized they put Xander's Snoopy dance in the intro

Woaw an intellectual conversation

Willow trying to hype Buffy up

Bro put the monkey head near the Styx water 🙄

"Do me" yeah I bet she would

Riley tackling her 😭

I was confused about the Q reference because I thought it was Star Trek

Harmony is on the lam

"Desperate are you?" Ewwwww

Harmony takes up smoking

"Can you help with the thinking?"

Fuck is Joyce gonna die soon? Is this like lead-up to her death?

Dawn playing with the medical equipment

Bro what's up with Riley's heartbeat

I forgot about the initiative fucked up his heart

Fun fact from Dawn

Me after IB history tbh

She's literally the meme of "The Egyptians believe the most important thing you could do in your life is die"

Who's girl calling

Yeah I probably wouldn't trust this either

"Don't be insecure" great thanks I'll just stop

"Harmony, is it a sodding bread box?"

"The enormous hall monitor"

Man that's not gonna get you any money

The string was slippy

"You should have been here when it was a school"

Nice light spell

I'm trying so hard to care about Riley's feelings rn but idk I'm always on Buffy's side

"If that's what I wanted then I'd be dating Spike" lol

This is like trying to convince the average man to go to the doctor tbh

Wait can bro pick flowers ?

Graham is having a rough day

Smoking right next to the open brain is crazy

"Oh God, sorry, didn't see the sign!" And she's not even being sarcastic

Man he just did your brain surgery for you

Harmony gets wrecked

Buffy just push him off girl

The chip is still oh my gosh 😭

Riley is okay so that's good

Idk man I don't think

Biggest Buffy plot hole is why they keep Spike alive like they have to make up reasons like "oh he can't fight back" neither could the humans he killed 😭😭

WHAT GHE FUCK

Ewwwww

OH ITS A DREAM THANK GOD

[beans-core]

So. Rambles under the cut. I’m a little feral cause I’ve been postponing watching this for a hot minute.

moments from Batman v Superman that made me Feel Something:

the gun that killed Martha being placed just right between her necklace so when it shot her pearls broke. Like. Ough.

“Do you bleed?”

said while staring into Clarks soul with your glinting crazy eyes. such a very normal thing to say bruce. If this version of Bruce wayne wasn’t running around in a bat costume I feel like he’d be a mad scientist. he and lex could be crazy scientist buds who experiment on aliens together. Also the following “you will” after Superman flew away was cringeworthy but the first bit made up for it.

The whole conversation Clark had with his mother, along the lines of “you don’t owe them anything” : Thanks Ma Kent for being so real and true. Also great how Clark runs to her for every emotional crisis what a mommas boy /pos

“I’m older now than my father ever was.”

yo what the fuck that came out of left field and kneed me in the kidney. No words just ouch.

“This is my legacy.” … “The first generation [of Waynes] made their fortune trading with the French. Pelts and skins. They were hunters.”

Olay the look on his face when he said the last sentence was lowkey bringing back the crazy eyes— tempered of course bc it’s Alfred. But jeez no wonder his mask doesn’t cover his eyes because when he gets that freak glare you know it’s scary af for an opponent. Or sexy. Distracting in many ways. Someone put that expression under a microscope. Someone put him under a microscope.

“No one stays good in the world”

Before flying off? Just like that? Had to pause, debate whether to laugh or be suprised, and then just ended up saying “what??” at the screen.

Batman’s metal suit. Brother please you look like if a soup can wanted to be a real boy. I know it’s for a reason, two of those being to look shiny and to include platforms in your boots, but it’s so goofy. Goofy in a cool way.? Like it’s corny because it looks overly intimidating and dangerous, but it also does actually kick ass so. Idk man. Mixed feelings but the majority is LMAO

When bruce hits Clark with the kryptonite poof for the second time, Clark collapses … Bruce goes out of his way to rip a sink off the wall and break it over Clark’s head… i CACKLED. You have so many weapons, multiple that you made specifically for defeating Clark, and you use the FUCKIN SINK.

Ohhh the whole “why did you say Martha!?” Moment. Bruce wondering what else Clark knows just for Lois to rush in and be like “no mr batman that’s his mommas name”. I was sooo expecting for Bruce to go “ah okay well atleast it wasn’t about me teehee” and stiLL GUT HIM LIKE A FISH. Forgot there was more to the movie than the girlies fighting for a minute. But yeah whatever they reconciled. Boooo the show must go on

“I don’t deserve you Alfred.” “No sir, you don’t.”

Yeah… yeah. Especially when Alfred then takes over the fucking batplane thing and continues to be a badass like a minute later lmao.

Bruce you little bitch you can’t introduce yourself as “a friend of your son” to Martha when you were trying to spear him dead not an hour earlier?? This part had me giggling hard. Also Martha you continue to be the best mwah kisses

“You lose.” “I don’t know how to lose.” “You’ll learn.”

CLARK. I don’t need to say anything for this other than CLARK *swoon*.

WONDER WOMANS INTRO MUSIC HAHAHAH

…And then the rest of the movie I forgot to have rational thought. Like a dog seeing a squirrel— Ooo wow fight scenes. Got me like 👁️👁️

Only zoned back in for a moment to laugh at how Bruce and Diana were standing behind Lois while she was having her emotional funeral moment like 🧍🧍.

Honorable mention (aka it’s impossible to narrow it down to my fav parts): every single thing about Lex Luthor Junior. Lex being a charismatic twitchy evil nerd who really really wants to dissect aliens is scarily endearing. Peeling off the dead-guy-kryptonian’s fingerprints— straight up skinning them off the body and wearing them to enter the spaceship is. Hah. Like yeah exactly, the dude you’ve introduced to me in this movie would definitely do that. Calling Superman and god and then full-naming his secret identity, like Lex is shoving the fact that there’s more under the ‘divinity’ right in his face. Oooooh yeah. Setting up a hero surprise date— a “fight night” for “god versus man”— like a deranged matchmaker? Kind of iconic. HOW HE REVEALED HE KIDNAPPED CLARKS MOTHER?? Oh, he’s AWFUL. and he’s GIDDY, completely unrepentant. I’m jittering just thinking about it he made it rain on supes with pictures of his captured mother. that’s a hilarious amount of emotionally fucked up. Fundamentally twisted, that goober is. “and now god bends to my will” AHHHH. But yeah just love how they made him batshit insane, pun entirely intended. The last bit w/ the “dingdingding” was funny.

Jesse Eisenberg played the whole ‘tweaky freaky psycho geek’ sitch sooo well like dude hats off. You found your niche— nerds, psychos, emotionally repressed people, or a wombo combo— and you stuck with it. Keep spreading your geek freak my beloved.

Bonus thirst:

BATTFLECK OH MY GODSHSJDHD… he’s so. Wow. And he’s so fucking large??? Idk how to word it because I’ve just never seen someone with such a stance. A presence. Like his shoulders are so wide? Broad? Genuinely how does he fit through doors being such a hulking hunk of a man. he looks HAWT in a suit, the suit is what enhances it. In his batsuit it’s personally no biggie but as Bruce Wayne he’s SCRUMPTIOUS.

WONDERWOMAN. good holy mama she’s gorgeous, of the drop-dead variety. Her accent is. I’m on my knees. The scene where she gets knocked down by the Monster Thing, huffs, smirks, and then gets back up to fight. WOOF. and of course she’s absolutely beautiful in her dresses but something about that hero costume… maybe it’s how nonchalant she is about killing the Monster Thing while Brice and Clark are both like “wait where did she come from. i thought you brought her.”

Clark is a cutie pie and I Would, don’t get me wrong. But also his cuteness for me is more based on his personality so I don’t classify it as thirst. Kansas boy earned his hotness for me by doing his hero thing, which is pretty on brand actually.

[t0ast-ghost]

Okay so I’m back on my bullshit (watching the original series for the first time) I’ll just start by giving a brief look at episode 4 and then a much longer look at episode 5.

Episode 4 (Where No Man Has Gone Before):

- where the fuck is Bones, I miss him :((

- please let Spock wear blue, cool colours suit him

- there’s a moment when Elizabeth is defending Gary and the whole room looks at her like “damn you got the whole room laughing”

- guys wait, just hit him with a rock, seriously

- “Nobody but us chickens doctor” - Kirk

- Scotty on da bridge

- there’s something about Star Trek and their psychiatrists always being women or being weaker, I wanna see a psychiatrist who is super buff and trained. Like you better process your feelings and seek help (I guess Ezri is more tough, but I still think her character is not well done)

- I bet those contacts hurt and were blinding. Like evil dead contacts were super thick and hurt and that was in the 80s, this is the 60s so those could not have been comfortable

- I like when things just appear/disappear in this show

- Kirk won’t hesitate to punch a bitch

- “I felt for him too” that’s such a big moment, Spock admitting that to Kirk

Episode 5 (The Naked Time):

My knowledge of this episode comes from the second episode of next generation so…

- damn those suits are orange

- “he was taking a shower fully clothed” mind your damn business

- OMG LEONARD MCCOY!

- “And as for my anatomy being different from yours, I am delighted.” DAMN GET HIM

- I think they may be flirting ur honour

- WHAT?!? Is that allowed??? I mean uhm…

- OMG ITS GEORGE TAKEI

- that blood is pink.. oops he’s dead now

- Bones sitting on tables/horizontal surfaces like this compilation

- uhm why’s he circle him like that tho

- “I want the impossible checked out too” WHAT, STOP BULLYING HIM!!!

- falling

- more falling

- YEAH KIRK YOUD BETTER BE SORRY DONT GET MAD AT YOUR CREW!!!

- oh wait is that nurse chapel?!? I haven’t seen strange new worlds (other than the lower decks episode) but I know chapel has a relationship with Spock

- I like how fucking emotional Spock actually is. Like I know he’s under the control of the virus in this episode but he shows so many emotions anyway. I love him.

- “I am in control of my emotions” sure bbygirl

- but in more seriousness this scene is amazing

- Sulu: let’s out the most pained terrifying scream

Bones: ._.

- “hey can I get a sip of that water” “it’s not water” “oh vodka I like your style” “it’s a complex chain of molecules that acts like alcohol when it enters the bloodstream” “what” “it’s sweat alcohol, pussy” (bones when explaining how the virus works)

- “Jim when I feel friendship for you, I’m ashamed” how do I- how am I- what do I do with that line

- James Kirk not afraid to slap a bitch

- SPOCK NOT AFRAID TO SLAP A BITCH BACK

- “SINNER REPENT” just write REDRUM stfu

- BONES Was it necessary to RIP HIS SHIRT???

- “are you alright James?” SIR CALM DOWN SPOCK CALM YOURSELF

- it is funny how immediately after both Spock and McCoy are right by Kirk’s side

- “time warp” ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW MENTIONED

- and they decided not to become time travellers

Okie dokie, if ya got this far, thanks! I’m enjoying watching through this and I like sharing it with all of you. Follow for more I guess?

the first episode thoughts

And all the other episodes thoughts

My Star Trek experience has been all over the place lol (next generation to lower decks to ds9 to aos and now arriving at tos (yeah I know it’s terrible I watched aos first but KARL URBAN))

[parme-san]

👺 evilvillain123456789 Follow

alright listen, i need you to focus. i need you to go dig deep in your mind, this is important. we are going to perform an experiment of the sorts, i'm going to have to ask you to bear with me for a moment. now i need you to open your mind. your eyes, close em. you are now about to be placed under my hypnosis. for the next four and a half minutes, we are going to explore ito your mind to find out why you're so fucking jealous. now why did they make yoohoo. pippitycacapoopoo. sike, i'm kidding, i just wanted to see if you're still listening. okay, now i need your undivided attention. sir, i have a question: why do i always sense this undeniable tension? from the moment that i enter into the room it gets all quiet and whispers. whenever there's conversation, why am i always mentioned? i've been dying to ask, it's been itching at me, is it just because you're just jealous of me cause you you just can't do what i do so instead of just admitting it, you walk around and say all kinds of really mean things about me cause you're a meanie. A meanie. but it's only cause you're just really jealous of me cause i'm what you wanna be so you just look like an idiot when you say these mean things cause it's too easy to see you're really just a big weenie. big weenie. alright now I— shit. i just flubbed a line. i was going to say something extremely important but i forgot who or what it was. i fucked up. sike i'm kidding again you idiot no i didn't. that's just what you wanted to hear from me, is that i fucked up, ain't it? but i can bust one take without looking at no paper. it doesn't take a bunch of takes or me to stand here in this booth all day for me to say the truth, okay? you're drooling. you have tooth decay. your mouth is open. you're disgusting. what the fuck you eat for lunch? a bunch of sweets or something? what, you munch a bunch of crunch n munch? your tooth is rotten to the gum. your breath stinks, wanna chew some gum? "yes, i do, sir, what am i on?" you sir, are on truth serum. "marshall i'm so jealous of you, please say you won't tell nobody i'd be so embarrassed, im just absolutely terrified that someone's gonna find out why i'm saying all these terrible evil and awful mean things, it's my own insecurities" alright, now we we're going to conduct that experiment that we were talking about earlier. just to see what a frog looks like when it takes two hits of ecstasy. cause that's exactly what your eyes look like. wanna check to see? here's a mirror. notice the resemblance here? wait, let me put these sunglasses on. now look in this mirror. how bout now? what do you have in common? you're both green with envy and look like idiots with sunglasses on em. you look like i sound like posting about weenies. now take my weenie out of your mouth. this is between me and you: I know you're not happy. i know you'd much rather see me lying in the corner of a room somewhere crying curled up in a ball tweaked out of my mind dying. there's no denying that my weenie is much bigger than yours is. mine is like sticking a banana between two oranges. why are you even doing this to yourself? it's pointless. why do we have to keep on going through this? this is torturous. my point is this: that if you say mean things, your weenie will shrink. now i forgot what the chorus is, you're just a...you're just jealous of me cause you you just can't do what i do so instead of just admitting it you walk around and say all kinds of really mean things about me cause you're a meanie. a meanie. but it's only cause you're just really jealous of me cause I'm what you wanna be, so you just look like an idiot when you say these mean things cause it's too easy to see you're really just a big weenie. Big weenie. fuck off my dick.

[thegeminisage]

STAR TREK UPDATE TIME, holy shit! tuesday we watched ds9's "a time to stand" and "rocks and shoals."

a time to stand:

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUGH

i feel like ds9 is so fucking good every episode i rate "watch" on ym spreadsheet would easily be "must see" in any other trek show. where do i even fucking start

i love that theyre just casually mentioning bashirs darkest secret in playful banter now. theres something in there that makes me very emotional but also it's extremely funny. also, he really DOES quote percentages like a vulcan. whatever he and garak were doing, i don't know what that was but i loved it. literally his boyish smile

oh speaking of couples. KIRA AND ODO. they've got the station all to themselves...um, e quark. i did get deluded for a hot second, when they were all at the bar together, into believing in kira e odo e quark. i don't think that's going to be a permanent feature in my psyche but it was fascinating to experience just once

ODO. MAKES HANDS. TO TOUCH PEOPLE WITH!!!!!!!!!!!

no one made this gifset so i have to make do with a screencap

HE MAKES HANDS TO TOUCH PEOPLE WITH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i may have had to pause the episode to start screaming

also. hi. "im glad you can still smile" "only when im with you" what if i threw myself into the sun

dukat and kira, holy shit. i've never been so scared in my life. i think about it all the time that he essentially called leeta into his office to fuck him. he BLOCKED KIRA'S EXIT. jesus christ we've come so far from his gay little fireworks show and the thron in his ass

odo manipulating weyoun who's obsessed with him <3 king. but he only did it because <3 kira asked him to. he literally said i've walked this horrible horrible line before i can do it again...their relationship is somehow moving forward because they are going back in time

and like GOD she knows he loves her and she hasn't decided how she feels back but somehow it's still comfortable because he doesn't ask for anything...IMPECCABLE fucking vibes. WHO is doing it like them

on the spaceship side, all of that was very fun, especially sisko and his <3 headaches. but even funnier was them getting stuck 17 years away from help. JUST like. star trek voyager

rocks and shoals:

AND IT GETS BETTER!

kira in this episode. mwah. she quite literally can't live with herself and it's SO clever because at first you the viewer are also like aaaa no dont let the bajorans protest aaaaaa theyll get in trouble and then kira has the change on heart and youre like oh shit. oh fuck. whose side am EYE on?

also, the fact that this was also odo's kneejerk reaction, and she said "don't make me fight you too" and he immediately fell in line. that's love.

garak's "oh, NO" as they were falling. please let the man say "oh shit"

o'brien ripping his pants <3 incredibly funny i felt like i was getting loopy right along with them. the wide shot of the flaming ship sinking into the sea as they laughed their asses off.......cinema

poor dax!!! she tries so hard to be brave but man she really did get fucked up

the little vorta freak in this episode...i want him dead. what an evil thing to do to your own guys AND one of sisko's people died too because of it. ik they won't kil him but they should kill him

i wasn't expecting the thing between garak and nog to have like consequences but it was funt hat they brought it back up. good for them and good for nog, even though i still wish it had been bashir on the post

julian being so chirpy and cheerful w the vorta after fixing him up as though he is a normal patient...sir please control yourself

my only complaint is i wish jake had more to do...right now he just seems to be getting underfoot, when staying behind was supposed to be a sign of maturity. hopefully all his reporting isn't for nothing!!!!

TONIGHT: voy's "day of honor" and "nemesis"

[siremasterlawrence]

In To The Dark Ages Part 2

Part 1 - 2

We hop on the horse kicking it in the shin as he races past the border going upward in to the north and we sped up to the gates of the castle causing a stir as both former man of kings.

They storm up to the gate demanding that they drop the draw bride to the gate as it comes crashing down and he rode in to the castle as people back off as we stride in so strongly.

We drop to the ground as the guards are on their way arriving with swords lead us inside to meet the king but unfortunately it was his son instead and Prince Stephen is at his side of it.

He stood as a Prince on the thrown proudly he is pumping up his fists in the air and then on his chest like a damn gorilla he howls in to the air excruciatingly and I watch in utter amazement.

He notices me jumping to the stone ground of the area staring at me almost daring me to fight and I wave him off arrogantly I know I am in control and I remove my sword from my sheath.

He does the same waving his sword in a hot rhythmic way but I block it with mine and we are at a stand still but I manage to kick him to the side.

The crowd enrage goes on attack mode in a beautiful display of strength and effort come at me but Ian leaps unfortunately in front of me.

His sword burns on fire as he protects me in a unmatched showmanship of conviction and loyalty like no other I have seen on this planet of will ever see at this point I turn to see Brandon.

He slays through hoard on the defensive he has one aim to be mine, one goal to save me at all cost and mostly importantly to expand my kingdom but it all falls in to place when he and Ian stabbed Stephen.

“You dare choose to question the king and challenge him.”

“He is the rightful heir obviously we learnt that too.”

“For sure Ian! I will not allow you to prevent his rise to this throne.”

“Besides he is not a king yet.”

“I am the only heir to the throne.”

“Foolish!”

“Ian and Brandon you have my permission to finish them all off and free the castle.”

“What should we do with Prince Stephen”

“He will see things my way eventually”

“I cannot see that happening .”

“Then why is my voice calling to you.”

“Yyyeeessss! I - I - I accept and obey “

“Do you comprehend everything?”

“You compelled me”

“ No need to resist”

“We are one body “

“We are all me mind”

“I belong to you “

“Kneel for me”

“Yes! My king”

“Sir Yes Sir”

Part 3 - 4

What we do not the man at the draw bridge drops setting motions that would transform this kingdom in to a magnificent a new off world because I will it to be at the center of it all.

The three men kneeling in front of me enjoy the power sensational bits of pleasure over taking them and spreading through nerves, blood and more all else is lost because I rule all.

I touch the tip bog each sword energetically transporting my presence in to it as if it is all about me because I am King now and own all who dare to fight me and rule against me ever again.

“Take a seat Sire”

“Are you sure boi?”

“Of course you rule”

“I’ll deal with my father “

“Do not worry”

“Mwahahahahaha”

“Ian…Brandon”

“Yes King”

“Join him “

“We will correct our brother “

“After I will pound you Stephen “

“Mmmmm! I can’t wait “

“What treachery is this?”

“Father you are home “

“Master Lawrence meet King”

“Tom”

“Do not deign to speak for me”

“Don’t be ridiculous father”

“Your eyes why are they…evil you have been possessed or enchanted.”

“The level of disrespect boi”

“You are disrespectful father “

“You speak with such rarity to me”

“I speak boldly the truth”

“Block him, hold him down and I’ll strike him “

“Who are you ? What have you infected my son with?”

“Infect no! I merely took what I want.”

“Why are you laughing? No! Do not place your lips on mine. Nnnnoooooo! Fuck! That is the most deliciously empowering experience my King.”

The end

[carmenized-onions]

chapter 1 - going back to my roots!! (spoilers for those who haven’t rear the most recent chapter)

the way you mirrored that first sentence with the mikey - EVIL

if it’s a love confession she should definetely answer😁 - imagine if it was…imagine that

if carmy knew her neighbourhood wasn’t peaceful he’d have her in his apartmentment at once!!

But a part of you is relieved it’s a thing that’s broken, and not her - oh this hurted

“The doorknob on the inside, broke off. And right now, or, more like, 5 minutes ago, the handle on the outside broke off too.” - the way it all goes back to her, mikey and richie ugh your mind

Now that’s an uncomfortably familiar voice. - RICHIEEEE. ugh reading it with all the contexr is just wow!!!powerful stuff

Nobody has to know you’re wearing pajama shorts under this - lowkey hot tho😁

an older woman smoking and having an emotional spat - donna!! makes sense that chippy never met her but oh i wonder how that would’ve gone

She gently slaps your cheek - tina is so cuteee

You’ve never said his name to him - the way everything makes sense now oooof

love the switch up between “Sweetheart, I need you to stand up for me, Carmen Chef Sir.” and “….Who the fuck is Tony?”

“Aye… Cousin?”- i used to think the cousin was for carmy but it’s for her 🥹🥹🥹 my fave besties 🥹💕🫶🏼😭 (also i’ve had two dreams now about richie being my best friend… yeah the mental illness is,,,)

Girlfriend? Probably - that could’ve been you already if you listened to mikey’s advice but i guess claire had to happen *for the plot*🙄

“You’re just. Cold.” - sobbing actually

you lower your arms— But. He opts to place his chin on your shoulder - 😭😭😭 them!!!!!

retaining - the bold on retaining 💀💀💀

definitely a virgin - ajajsjejrjri not for long (well i can dream 😁🫶🏼)

sweetheart, asshole - so true 💕💕

omg remember back when the chapters were this short (compared to the newest ones)yeah me neither. love you love your dedication!!<3

this is the best day of my life, getting people's re-reading thoughts is the best experience of my life AND FROM YOU TOO LU!! LOVE YOU!!!

ANyways. CHAPTER 1 THOUGHTS BUT WITH C O N T E X T now.

I can't remember if I always planned to mirror the intro line with Mikey. I'm pretty sure I did? I think I went back and forth a couple times on whether or not it was stupid-- And it very well might be, but I know it makes everyone rereading mad so I think it was worth it and good and cool of me.

Everyone gets so hung up on the love confession line now it makes me so happy. I'll be so fr I didn't plan Squidink to happen in the beginning-- Though I did originally concept this whole series as x Syd before switching lanes, I don't remember when it locked in for me that I was going to be gay about it. Probably Zero Pulse? Yeah probably.

carmen's gonna crash tony's credit score on purpose so she has to move out: canon-- canon i said it it's canon! kidding

THE DOOORKNOOBBB this I always planned-- I don't know if they go over it in canon but fr why the fuck did the inner knob break off so easy that's so deeply concerning man.

RICCHIEEE, he IS powerful stuff bro.

"lowkey hot tho😁" so tony is now a character and it's Tony x reader now, i see?

DONNNAAAAA, it only makes sense for Tony to be in a rush and avoid Donna in this opener, but I do also wonder how violently different this night would've gone if she listened in on their convo for like even two seconds.

It's extremely funny to go from "i need to be so nice to this kid, he meant everything to my best friend" to "what the FUCK are you yapping about?" in two seconds.

I THINK A LOT OF PEOPLE USED TO THINK RICHIE SAYING COUSIN WAS FOR CARMEN, I remember for chapter 2 so many people going awe he calls her cousin-- baby, always has! Also were you a handyman in those dreams be HONEST!!!

smh chip if you simply just followed big bros advice you could probably be living together by now but NO Carmen had to get with the ACTUAL DOCTOR instead of the EMT!!!! bro loves women in healthcare

JUST COLD!!!! JUST COLD!!! man if i had a hat i'd throw it and i literally wrote all this. The little descriptions Mikey gave of his siblings were also honestly some of my favourite bits to write from this first chapter. Had to look at me and my two brothers and go how would I honestly describe these two and how brutal would I be about it? 100% older brother Mikey has to humble Carmen's ass with a ALWAYS EMPHASIZED R E T A I N I N G. He's proud but like. come on you didn't get them, carm.

i miss the days of short chapters. though I think we're kind of going back to it if not taking a brief pitstop of short. This next one I pray to god is under 10k i'll 86 myself i swear to god. LOVE YOU!!!

memes are so good, who the FUCK are you cousin!!! sydney's new apartment in S3 should be free-- rent should be free during pride month actually that's the law also i'm pretty sure everyone IS making sex up anyways anyways do i have a piece of wip i could give you my darling let's see

oh i do but i'm gonna be so fucking mean about it.

WHAT THE FUCK ARE THEY YAPPING ABOUT!!!!??? WHO KNOWSSS (i know)

anyways i have to pack up from work and get the FUCK out of here see you all later conspire over this screenshot losers love u

[summertimemusician]

Honestly the one thing that really frustrates me about Hyrule Warriors is how they cut Linkle being Link's sister, because otherwise it would have recontextualized Warriors entirely as a character.

This is mainly just headcanon territory, but something always bugged me about him being a knight in training from the get go, mainly because it's usually never any Link's first choice with First, Sky and Wild being the main exceptions (Gaepora took him in, and Gaepora runs the knights academy, makes sense he'd want to join then plus he'd probably want to protect Sun, plus Skylofts knights function differently than Hyrule knights, they don't have the same hierarchy and Skyloft is pretty peaceful before SS truly picks up so again, makes sense he wouldn't have troubles joining, we don't know First's reasons besides him seeing evil on the horizon and deciding if no one's was gonna do anything about it he might as well do it himself, and Wild was basically recruited at a young age for pulling the Master Sword while presumably young, he was never given a choice), we see it with Four, he's a blacksmiths apprentice under his grandfather and we see in his manga him practically baring his teeth at his father he won't become a knight and he doesn't pick up the sword unless really necessary, we see that with Time, he was raised as a Kokiri, he dreamt of adventure already from the drawings we see in his room, but he could always just become an adventurer if he wanted to though of course we see that change with the Hero's Shade, I'll come back to that, Wind? Was content living in Outset with Aryll before Ganon decided to fuck around and found out really hard, Legend was also a blacksmiths apprentice and adventurer and he only takes up knight training in the manga because Sir Raven inspired him, like even if he didn't want to be a knight the training would still serve him well (and lo and behold the advice pays off given all the shenanigans mostly caused by divine beings Legend gets saddled with), Hyrule obviously leaves in a very hostile world so he wouldn't even have ANY time to think about knight training, he's self taught because he'd literally die if he wasn't given monsters need his blood to ressurect Ganon so it's honestly a unique case of technically self defense, either he learned to hunt or he'd remain hunted, Twilight is the same case as Wind's, Ganondorf fucked around and found out with the wrong older sibling's people plus the protagonists heavily implied love interest(s) and got shafted into next week, him and Dusk don't have a personal connection besides Midna for him to stick around much and we see him go back to Ordon, so no knighthood there, so why was Warriors different? What motivated him?

I think Linkle being his younger sister would have been the answer.

Long post ahead, continue under your own risk

I know lots of people characterize Warriors as being of a noble line and joined the knights at the urging of his father, but let's not forget most Links are orphans so thinking Wars is an exception is a pipe dream. So that's out, however, in medieval times knights actually get plenty of benefits since they work mostly for lords, ladies and the local crown, being a knight is synonymous with being a noble or at least having a decent life at the cost of serving someone else and the Hyrulean knights don't really have any requisites before joining (though we do see long lines of knights exist, which some Links are descended from without their knowledge, so it's not farfetched to think that a good chunk of the knights of Hyrule qualify as members of noble houses loyal to the Hyrulean crown, would also explain their why they're ineffective a lot of the time too, if most of them grew noble and Hyrulean isn't war seeking {most of the time} then they wouldn't have any real experience), it would be a good way for Warriors to support himself as he climbs up the ranks, and most importantly, someone else, because he'd need to make that money to feed Linkle if she's his younger sister because most Links who take on elder sibling roles are at their best when trying to protect their younger siblings (Wind with Aryll, Twilight with Collin, to an extent Legend and Gulley, all Links are at their best when fighting/protecting someone else), Linkle could grown up without restrictions and he could support them both, making them work harder than other knights because he's already at a disadvantage.

Making it so he's in the perfect place at the right time to get noticed by Artemis before the War of Ages, and give him a reason to go against orders and fight rather than standby like other traineés, being discovered as the Hero in the process.

And as a result since Mask is in the war too, he gets inspired by Warriors (who as an older brother would definitely just snatch him, Wind, Tetra and heck even the Skull Kid under his wing because no way is he letting children younger than even his own little sister fight alone) and eventually becomes a knight too after presumably stopping his search for Navi or using his knight status to search more effectively, which gives us the Time we see in LU who eventually become the Hero's Shade, which trains Twilight. Because he looked up to Warriors while younger.

I just think it's a huge missed opportunity with a lot of room for angst/hurt comfort/drama, and also opportunities for Warriors, Legend and Wild to bond over not really liking the knights because they've all not likely been treated well by his fellow knights while young even though he himself is one, and that Warriors would absolutely be one of the first to throw hands if he heard another soldier talk badly about any of the Links, in this essay I will-

[clonerightsagenda]

Another fun conversation I found while digging for those tidbits, this one about Maxwell and Pryce

Gill side note: while there is some exterior material to canon suggesting Pryce and Maxwell would Not get along it's very funny because how many steps from "I can rewrite a memory" and "experimenting on an AI unit to expand his capacity" is it really to hard-coding anxiety into an AI's personality matrix, and from there to scooping someone's brain out to replace it with a glorified RC rig Kat for real Gill this is unexplored territory people!! Kat I think Maxwell wants to believe she's an ethical AI scientist but when the rubber hits the road….she's not that different from Pryce Gill you'd rewrite them against their consent when you believe it's necessary just because your parameters for "when it's necessary" are narrower and less nakedly self-serving doesn't mean that isn't what's going on Kat I think she would see that as the 'kinder' option versus deleting Hera, but at the end of the day you're violating her consent when she was explicit that she'd rather die Gill you're still changing the building blocks of someone's identity based on what you believe is best for them against their explicit wishes not to Slippery Slope Argument but it would have been very fun to see Maxwell go off on Pryce and then have Pryce hit her upside the head with a devastating "we're not so different" speech Kat shame Maxwell didn't make it to s4 so she could be the restraining bolts and be like hm is this the inevitable slippery slope of my actions Still wonder how Maxwell thinks invented AI since she'd never heard of Pryce. was Cutter just like here's this cool tech. don't ask where it came from Kate I keep forgetting that… They don’t keep her secret, she co-published the DSSPPM Kat I guess that's true, it's possible she knew who Pryce was but just didn't recognize her Gill Maxwell: Surely, like all tech corporations, there is a large team of brilliant engineers who worked round the clock on this whose names will never be known in their lifetimes. The idea of the rock star genius entrepreneur is a myth. Dr Pryce: lol Kat actually no looking at the script, Pryce uses her name and Maxwell still asks who it is someone never read the survival manual Kate I can definitely imagine no one knows what Pryce looks or sounds like though Reclusive scientist And oh, huh Kat someone hearing Pryce talk for the first time: blorbo from my AI programs? Gill I mean how often do you pay attention to the authors of your Mandatory Corporate Reading Assignment Literature Also, side note; comms director Minkowski going ballistic on Alien Zombie Maxwell upon finding out she never even read the manual Kat Cutter: everyone kept complaining to me that 'oh your evil daughter killed and ate an intern' 'oh your evil daughter weaponized the microwave' like get over yourselves. now none of you get to see her there is canonically a separate si5 manual. Maxwell probably also didn't read that one Gill She’s like me, Re: the “Anything that’s actually important is something you learn while actually doing the job” attitude Kat Kepler: And you both read the SI5 manual correct Jacobi, deepest sigh of all: yes sir Maxwell sotto voice: kissass Maxwell had to read the fucking Bible as a child she's had enough of this shit Gill Apropos of nothing at all I am now imagining Pryce adding as an aside in an evil monologue “and also, I have prion disease” Kat Pryce: The rogue proteins keep dismantling my brain but I keep building it back together again faster Gill Goddard Futuristics rolls out a new treatment/preventative for prion disease Why did they make this? Don’t worry about it Kate “It’s for all those poor mad cows in England :) don’t worry about it :) “ Gill As in the alternative to “also I have prion disease” is “also one of my superpowers I invented for myself is immunity to prion disease. Do not ask why I did this or why it was needed.” Kat but yeah it's a shame even with alien zombie Maxwell she can't really have a Confront Your Dark Potential with Pryce bc Miranda's semi-confused about the whole thing Hera will just have to yell at her

Gill Alternatively you flip it. Build the narrative so that Miranda is like “oh my god is this what I was like??” And Maxwell goes “wait no you’re supposed to be my cautionary tale shadow archetype” Kat alien zombie Maxwell being perma-brainfogged due to the whole bullet to the head thing: man this sucks Miranda: I could probably try neural reconstructive surgery Maxwell: uh Hera: what :) does that idea bother you for some reason : ) i'm sure it would be fine : ) Hera briefly throwing behind Miranda 100% for the only time in her life Kate Maxwell and Miranda together would be. Nightmarish for Hera and an emotion I would LOVE to see Kat Doug: I mean I'd still be ok with her trying to fix my lungs Hera: no shut up. I want her to cut open Dr. Maxwell's brain Gill Hera like “both of them are the bad guy and lesser of two evils relative to each other. I have sympathetic feelings for both and wish to have them near me as little as possible. I want to see them fight to the death” Kate And she is So valid

[notmuchtoconceal]

From the banks of the river marched the steps. From the muck, scumflows poured down craterprints of his boots into steppes.

Seated on a stone, wide so the cleave nestled his cheeks, Brother Jacek sat soaked in the depths to which he had plunged, his men bravely walking off sepsis as they clenched their stabwounds behind him.

"I like Brux when he's manly," he said aloud to himself.

Staring at his own shadow. Starring at the dancing grasses. The dancing grasses he longed to smoke, to feel himself lie back well-reclined within himself, knowing only good food and good music at tangerine sunsets of a perpetual dawning, well-alive and well-aware of the multitude within and without, wanting only needlessly, needing only to want.

"Sometimes he's so beefy and broad. He's uncouth with a violent strangeness which is dazzling as it is coarse. Like a horsehair tail sprouting flytraps or any manner of strange things which blur the vegetable from the insect, with a fuzziness at most arachnid."

These words. There must have been truth. Some were certainly his.

"Why does he insist on being written as this absurd and outrageous sissy? Is it all Joey's lies? Some of it has to be Joey's lies. What percentage of the things that Joey says are totally lies? (I feel anyone who believes in proper syntax is a liar who wishes to modulate my biorhythms along some arbitrary pole. Drunk you is real you. Sobriety is the Lie that Hey Zeus the Wino sold to his habituates.) Brux can't possibly be a bigger liar than Joey and Laika. In some regards, Brux simply has to be the lesser of two evils. Brux is so much better of a team bitch than Laika. Laika fucking sucks at being team bitch. Holy fuck. He either lies there and takes it or lies there and enjoys it lewdly and disgustingly or lies there and hates it and it's literally rape but he won't fuckin say anything. He won't even be like .... 'hey bro, stop fuckin rapin me!' or 'bro i'm real fuckin pissed bout all those times you raped me.' Naw, man. He's just like ... gonna sit there and hate you and not mention those times you raped him. Fuckin coward. Every time you rape Brux he won't shut the fuck up about it. He goes over the PA and lies about how many times you raped him so now you don't even know if it was an implanted memory or if you really did rape him. Why would anybody rape Brux? Does he get hotter when you're drunk? Do you think he would look extra rapeable if he was sober and you were drunk? I think you should get real drunk at a time when you know Brux has to be sober and see if you rape him. Why would you do this as a thought experiment, just make it happen, bro. Big bro rapes Brux all the time anyway. Maybe Brux is insane because big bro rapes him too many times. Maybe Brux is insane because big bro won't rape him. Brux is always tryin to get big bro drunk and big bro still won't rape him. I think he definitely did fuck with your memory, either surgically or through hypnotic suggestion."

The fifth of the Jacekobean men, falling to his knees.

Howling. Howling as he clenches the holes in his gut.

The first, moving forward.

Eclipsing him by the mountainpeak of his silhouette, grabs him. Grabs him by the throat and hammers him, hammers him in his perforated guts. Squirting out tarblack jets of bile to free the warm red blood.

Howling.

"THANK YOU, SIR BIG BRO, SIR!"

The second Jacekobean man screeches and waggles his tongue in the air. He encoils with the third, as the sixth encoils with the seventh. In rhythm, arms around shoulders and head locked against head, fisting each other in the open guts, aiming to raise intestines as worms after fresh rain to greet the sun at a daybreak of perpetual gunmetal red.

Brother Jacek leapt up.

"GOOD SHIT // FUCKIN SHIT TEAM, THAT'S WHAT I WANNA SEE."

They throw themselves to the muddy banks at his boots, each barebacked, barechested, scalp shorn by the flint.

"You have not earned the right to kiss my steeltoes. Polish them to a mirror shine with your lips though you will. What I decree to the wood will be heard by all, carried far by the birds which sit on these branches, flow far with the waters which lap at these roots. Slithering through the mud all seven of you will give me your skins. In a spectacular coat the color or every white man, a rainbow of snow shall I be in albino gator, rolling hills of elephant and peacock. I am the train always coming, though in the dead of night I am heard by all, none dare meet me at the station."

Licking the rocks. Bloodying their tongues.

Licking the lichen. With bloodied tongues.

Eyeing the mirrors of his toecaps where their faces compress as a diamond back to coal in a hydra of blistering faces, they press out their tongues, looking up piteously, never daring to defy fully and let the tips touch the edge where some glimmer of his greatness they would taste unduly, well-trained were they in the etiquette of proper brutality.

"Homeward, we are bound. My will I will make known."

"SIR YES SIR."

Leading him far, his stray heart knew every wind. So far off-trail, he knew the hardships of forging shortcuts. Positioning sight, he saw always through the thickets to the trails he would blaze, content that few would knock down walls to make doors, dice metaphors to make word salad, hearty ruffage though it was, for rabbits unfit to sear their stakes.