#i just...have a lot of criticisms of it lol

[corrodedcoffins-blog]

Meetings On Window Sills

masterlist

note: I fucking love 60s-70s music so there's a lot of it mentioned, and also remus is a full blown music nerd so why would i not make them bond over music?? also this was inspired by 2007s Jump In! starring my first crush: corbin bleu lol

warnings: didn't edit (don't care), little tiny bit of angst between remus and his dad, smoking, remus having back problems since 11 and a city boy, reader has hair long enough to put in a claw clip

word count: 3.8 k

♡ summary: Many don't know that during summer, Remus goes home to a muggle girl, and he spends more time on his fire escape than in his room some days

♡ Remus Lupin x fem!muggle!reader

request ✗

1971

He’d known her his whole life, well since he was 6 months old. Their mums had both gone to the same ‘mommy and me’ class and hit it off when they both took a smoke break. Since then their mums had noticed they didn’t have much in common and grew apart, not after buying apartments in the same building.

Remus stretched his back, hands on his waist while leaning back, just having done all his folding, getting ready to organize in his trunk. As he stood from the small single bed in the corner he heard the soft hum of music coming from outside, the young boy lifted his widow, needing much more force than when it was made. 

“I don’t know! I don’t know!” 

Remus looks to her widow, seeing the record player playing on her desk while she reads, not seeming to be doing a whole lot of that though. From his view it looks to be Little Women, which he had read and which he would never tell her, but he had been bored on a visit to his grandparents before they died and that was the only book in his moms childhood room, so he read it and enjoyed it enough to finish and not have much of a critic.

“You always sing that song much louder than the rest.” 

His sudden voice caused the girl to jump in her seat, putting the book down and turning down the record she looked at to him, slightly embarrassed at him catching her. 

“It’s my favourite.” She said moving to sit on her window seat. Remus of course noticed this as a sign that she wanted to continue the conversation, he also noticed the way she played with the bottom button of her cardigan. The boy exited his window onto the fire escape to sit on the window sill.

“It’s The Beatles?” “Yeah, my mum got it for me for Christmas last year. Along with George Harrison’s solo album, ‘cause he’s my favourite Beatle- he actually wrote the song I was singing.” She knew she went on a little too long but Remus wouldn’t stop her, that was the type of person he was, kind hearted. When he listened to her, he really listened, he heard every word and took it in.

“Because he wrote your favourite song?” “Not just that, but I guess that’s where it started then I looked through all my albums and all my favourite songs he wrote.” She briefly pointed behind her and he saw the self of records behind her.

“What ones?” He asked, getting more comfortable by leaning his back on one side of the window frame.

“Umm, I’m happy just to dance with you, and of course here comes the sun.” “That’s me mum's favourite, tells me every time it’s on the radio.” 

The conversation stalls, to avoid awkward stares Remus looks down to the street and watches a man with a yellow jacket cross the street, it glowing in the yellow street lights. His stare only breaks when he hears her voice ask, “What’re you packing for?”

“Oh- That..” Her brows furrow at the nervous tone, he wasn’t sure how to tell her, it wasn’t like they were best friends, they talked once in a while like how they are now and would see eachother at school, “I wasn’t sure how to tell people, I’m going to a different school next year.” “Where?” “It’s a boarding school up in Scotland.” “Why are they making you go?” 

Remus would be lying to say that didn’t surprise him, she sounded like she would miss him a little more than he thought she would, and that deeply confused him.

“My father went so-” It’s interesting how much truth he could say while withholding the biggest piece of information from her.

“That sucks. Aren’t you going to miss your friends.” “I never had many friends.” Overstatement. He had no friends, never really did, kids at school made fun of his scars, or for being a nerd, or for having second hand clothes that his mother still had to sew to be wearable; take your pick really. 

“Not many people like me.” “I like you.” Remus’s head lifted from its stare at his swinging legs, “As- as a friend of course.” “Of course, I like you as a friend too.” 

-

1973 

As soon as he walked through the door, Remus set on the way to his window, leaving his trunk at the door. 

“Hun! Where’re you going so fast?” His mum asked, placing the keys in the bowl by the door, and putting her hands on her hips. His father made his way past her to the kitchen.

“I missed my room!” He yelled, never slowing down the hall. Once they believed he was out of ear shot, he heard his father say, “He wants to see Jen’s girl.” 

As he got closer to her window he saw the girls laying on her back legs up resting on the wall while she read. Her head snapped to the window after the first knock, a large grin making its way to her face. She rolled off her bed and opened the window for him and he heard the tune of Bowie flowing through the room.

She crawled half out the window to hug him, her arms going around his neck and he held her back, his hands felt warm, his embrace felt safe. He wore a thin jumper that felt soft on her skin.

“I’m so happy you’re back.” “Me too.” They say, pulling back and getting comfortable on the window sill. She was still smiling at him, and him at her, before Remus felt he had to look away or he would explode. He took the moment to look at her room and it had changed quite a bit since last summer; bed against a new wall, something she did when she felt she needed a change. He noticed her vinyl collection had grown.

“You finally got Ziggy Stardust!” “Oh yeah!” She jumped off the ledge they sat on and made her way to put it on. 

“I went with some friends to London and we got to go to a huge record shop. Remus you wouldn’t believe the stuff they had there- they had Bob Dylan’s first album so my collection of his is complete.” “Brilliant.” Remus sat down on her window seat bench and grabbed the album from her shelf to get a closer look. With the Bowie record set up, she nudged the volume dial up before returning next to the boy. She hit his leg to get his attention, “Listen to this first one it’s my favourite.” 

He put the Bob Dylan album down to give his full attention to the music. 

Many hours later, the two were still perfectly content listening to album after album, pausing their conversation when a particularly good verse came. They were now on the floor of her room, the girl laid out on her carpet flooring, looking just as carefree and stunning as ever. 

“Joni next?” She said as the album playing came to a close, before he could respond they heard a knock on the window, it was his dad.

“Bit late, innit? ‘S past one, Remus.” “Sorry, Mr. Lupin, we lost track of time.” “‘S alright, dear, but come to bed Remus.” “Okay.” 

His father went back through the window and waited. Remus stood the floor and stretched his back, the girl stood as well, “Tomorrow?” “Yeah.” “G’night, Rem.” “G’night.” 

He joined his dad out on the fire escape as they made their way back to his room, once they got inside and closed the window his father broke the silence. “I know you like that girl, but you’ve ‘ot to keep her out of this world, especially with what you are.” 

And just like, an otherwise perfect night, ruined by one comment by his father. 

“I know.” “Alright. G’night, son.” The door shut behind him, and when he heard that click he let the tear drop.

He knew from his friends that  some people don’t care, they found out this past school year and he still hasn’t told his parents that fact. But for all his life he’s heard otherwise, and he can’t help but think one day the boy’s will come to their senses and leave him all alone again. Y/n though, a muggle, if he ever told her he can imagine that  best case scenario is him having to use obliviate.

-

1975 

Remus retreated to his room after dinner, wanting to sleep or read or something that didn’t involve more people, it had been a long day even before he got on the train home for the summer. As he grabbed the book on his desk he saw a trail of smoke leading to a certain girl’s bedroom, he leaned forward to see her with her glasses on, smoking a cigarette, and wearing mismatching pajamas.

He lifted the window with ease, causing the girl to flick her eyes back to him, “You're back.” “Same time every year.” Both shared a look with smiles on their faces, the girl broke eye contact to grab her pack of cigarettes, and overing him with one.

“Yeah.” He climbs out the window and comes to now sit on her window sill and takes his own cigarette, she grabs the light from behind her and he lets her light his. Her fingertips brushing against his check as she blocks the blooming flame from the soft summer breeze.

He takes the chance to gaze at her lips, wrapped around the cigarette, residue of lipstick left behind, a soft red. She never needed the makeup, but sometimes if he woke up early he could watch her put it on. A moment that he found she looked the most beautiful, practiced movements, mouthing the words to whatever song she was listening to, and the funny faces she made made him smile. 

“I missed you.” “Yeah?” A smile creeped on his face as he looked into her eyes. “Yeah.” “I missed you too. I always do.”

The girl looks away, a smile on her face, unaware that Remus continues his stare looking from her eyes to her smile and the way her hair falls in its clip. She wore a thin olive green tank top, he could tell she wasn’t wearing a bra so he moved his eyes to the clouds she was looking at. 

“How’re your friends?” Sometimes she felt as though she knew the boys, with how much Remus talked about them, her mind began to wonder if they knew as much about her as she knew about them.

“They’re just the same pricks they’ve always been.” “James got any farther with Lily?” She muttered, flicking off her cigarette and taking another puff, she looked so beautiful and natural. She had glasses that fell down her nose, messy hair that she liked that way, and a laugh like no other.

“Lils would like me to say ‘no’, but I think she likes him a lot more than she cares to share.” “That’s the way it always goes.” She trailed off, to look at him and he was already looking at her.

It was second year Remus became friends with Lily, they were paired up for a project together and became close. At first she was jealous of the girl, she felt that Lily was going to take her spot in Remus’ life, it weirdly enough was when she heard of James’ fondness for the ginger girl that she no longer worried. Well that and the fact that Remus never did anything to insinuate that he was any less friends with her because of Lily. 

And what she didn’t know was that half of the time he was with Lily, he ended up bringing up her.

-

1977 

Y/n was waiting all day for Remus to come home, she never left her room the whole day in waiting. Looking to his window every ten minutes in hope she would see her lanky boy crawling out his window.

It was late in the evening when she came back from the bathroom and immediately went to check, she almost didn’t believe her eyes when she saw the lamp beside his bed on. The girl shrugged on her cardigan that was lying across her desk chair, and crawled out the window.

Remus had just gotten back from a nice dinner with his parents, this was his last summer as a kid and they wanted to make it special from the beginning, especially since next week he was going to spend a month at the Potter’s. 

He was interrupted from changing by a knock on his window, he turned on his heels to see the girl he’s been waiting all year to see. Her smile lights up his face, she looks away and it takes him a moment to realize it’s because he isn’t wearing a shirt, clad in nothing but pajama pants gifted to him by Peter. He quickly slips on a jumper before he opens the window and she stumbles into his room. 

“Hey.” “Hi.” They each silently take this moment to get a look at eachother, the girl noticed that she could see that scar on his chest end just where his jumper begins, it’s surprising that she could know him since they were babies yet doesn’t know when he got that scar. To be honest she never asked about them, she could tell he was insecure about the way he looked, though in her mind there was no need to be.

During this Remus is having his own thoughts about her looks, she was wearing that cardigan she’s had since she was ten, underneath was a tank top like she commonly wore. Her hair was up in a clip, the same ones Mary always wore, small pieces of hair falling out. She was beautiful.

“Urm.. How have you been?” The boy asked justering for her to sit as he took a seat on his bed. She joined him, leaning against the wall and pulled a carton of cigarettes out of her cardigan pocket. 

“Good, yeah I’m good. You?” She replied, feeling around her pockets, “No lighter.” He stood from the bed and went to his dresser drawer, retrieving the pink lighter and throwing it to the girl, she caught it with ease yet didn’t begin to light.

“Is this the lighter I gave you?” 

When they were fifteen, they first smoked weed together, at a nearby park in order to not get caught by their parents. And Y/n, high, had given Remus her lighter when they had climbed back up the fire escape to their windows and told him, “This is my favourite lighter. I don’t know why? I think ‘cause it’s pink, so that means it’s lucky- ‘cause the lighter is lucky it’s pink and not some boring lighter like yours- No, you know what Remus? You should take this one, ‘cause it’s luckier and prettier than yours. But keep it safe, it’s my favourite.” 

That night Remus put it in his sock drawer to keep safe, he never wanted to use it or worse lose it, so he kept it safe just as she asked.

“Um, yeah.” He mumbled, a little embarrassed at the amount of sentiment he put into that cheap lighter. 

“You kept it?” “Yeah, you told me to.” 

He becomes even more embarrassed when she chuckles. She looks down at it in her hands, her chuckle dying down and smile slips. There's a moment of silence as Remus doesn’t know what to say so he just returns to his spot on the bed next to her. She doesn’t look up at him still as she asks, “Why did you keep it?” 

Truthfully Remus does know why he kept it, it was just because she gave it to him, but if that sounds lame in his head it will most definitely sound lame if he says it to the girl he likes, no love, he’s always known he loved her. So once again he’ll chicken out and doesn’t respond.

She waits for his answer, and when it never comes, “Is it.. For the reason I think?” She boldly asks, looking at the side of his face as he has not looked away from the spot on the wall in front of them. 

Another moment, and the beautiful girl tries to get his attention by leaning her face in his line of vision. His gaze is unnerved, he’s too consumed by the thoughts running in his mind, until they all go silent.

She presses a kiss to the side of his mouth and says, “I like you too.”

Head snaps to look at her, eye to eye, nose to nose, and finally lips to lips as Remus presses a hard kiss right on her lips. She immediately begins kissing back, and trying to take control but to her surprise Remus is a lot more comfortable in his actions now and is the one leading the kiss and pushing his tongue between her soft lips, which she gladly accepts.

The girl trails her hand up the inside of his thigh before skipping up to hold his jaw, Remus at the same time grabs her hips and squeezes, causing Y/n to swing one leg over his and straddle the boy’s lap. Her hands fall from his jaw, to his neck, to his chest and pushes him away lightly.

Both slowly allow their eyes to open and look at eachother, smiles mirroring each other. 

“So-” “Boyfriend girlfriend?” “Yeah, that’s cool.”

-

1977

“I’ll get the Bowie album, then we can listen to it when you get back.” “When’s it coming out?” “October.”

The girl replied, her head lying on his bicep as she played with his hand, drawing shapes and tracing his veins. In his other hand, resting on her stomach, Remus held the book he and Lily decided to read over the break for their informal book club. 

Y/n thought about asking what she’s been wanting to ask since they’ve gotten together, “Are you going to come home for Christmas?” The last time he did was fifth year, last year he had gone to his friend James’ house. And from what he told her, he had the best time, so you can see she was a little worried he would do that again and she wouldn’t get to see her boyfriend till next summer.

What she didn’t know was that Remus was hoping to avoid this at any cost, it was a full moon this christmas. So even if he did come home, he wouldn’t even get to see her much.

“I haven’t thought about it.” “Oh.” Damn, wrong thing to say. She thought about it. She asked him. She wanted him there.

“I mean- I would love to come home and see you! I just- I don’t know if-” “What?” 

She saw the hurt in his face, she knew whatever he was thinking about he was trying to push down and resist it, she sat up and sat crisscrossed facing him. She leaned down and grabbed his hands, gently taking the book out of his hands and marking the page by folding the corner.

“What’s wrong, Remus?... You can tell me.” “That’s just it- I can’t, or rather I shouldn’t.” “Okay, now I’m confused.” She scoffed, shaking her head and standing up to get some space, “What can you not tell me. I tell you everything.” 

Remus sat up, leaning against the wall on his bed, head in his hands, thinking about everything. Everything he ‘couldn’t’ tell her, if he couldn’t trust her he believed he couldn’t trust anyone ever again.

“Okay, you have to believe me though, and it’s going to sound like I’ve gone mad. So just remember that I know how absolutely insane I sound, and that I’m still telling you because I trust you. More than anyone.” Met with slight hesitance, Y/n replies, “Okay.”

“I’m a wizard.” He waits for the big reaction that never comes, he stares at the confused face of his girlfriend before he stands and goes to his bottom desk drawer and grabs his wand.

“Levioso.” The boy says, pointing at his record player and directing it as it levitates, before ultimately placing it back in the same spot on his dresser. When he looked back at the girl, her jaw opened in shock. 

“Holy fucking SHIT!... That just- in air! You are!” “A wizard? Yes.” “How? I mean- you- what?” 

Remus came to her side, guiding her to sit with him on his bed, “I know this is a lot to take in, but I’ve got more.” “MORE?” She looked towards him, concerned for what was to come.

“Yes. Okay, I’m also a werewolf.” “If I didn’t know you, or see that pissing record player float- God, I’d think you were too far gone.” Her words were a relief, causing Remus to chuckle, but truthfully a weight lifted off his chest, to have the most important person in his life to not judge him, “You have no idea how much that means to me- I’m the same Remus you knew, you just know everything now.” 

-

1977

“So I werewolves are real, what about vampires?” “Yes.” “What?! Am I going to have to worry about them?” “Don’t visit Romania.” “That’s not funny.”

They laid together, well Remus laid done while his girl moved every few moments, very excited about the new world she was learning about, at this moment she sat on the boy’s thighs with her legs straddling them on either side.

“What’s your favourite subject in school? For real, now that I know you don’t actually take English.” “Defence against the dark arts.” “That’s a class?” “Yes, a very important one.” He replied, moving his hands up the girl's thighs, from her knees to grasping her hips. He keeps his hands there, squeezing when he feels like it.

“What’s your least favourite?” “Flying. But I haven’t taken that since first year.” “WHY would you hate flying? That’s the dream.” “I don’t like heights.” “But you’re FLYING! Through the air!” “Really? Well, now I’ve got to rethink things.” “Oh, shut up.” 

Remus was laughing now, and he could tell she was trying hard not to. He pulled her down to him, keeping her there with his hands on her back as he attacked her cheek with kisses, “Ah!” 

The small scream falls on deaf ears as Remus continues kissing her cheeks to her jaw and burrows his head to the crook of her neck. He mumbles something she can’t quite hear, but she can just barely make out the word ‘love’. But still continues to fight him off, “Ah! Rem- tickles!” “Don’t care.”

[keferon]

NO BECAUSE. YES. AHAHA. LITERALLY talking about like. The continuities I know

Optimus does a lot of vanilla ass choices and perhaps the only reason Decepticons haven’t won instantly is just because Megatron is also prone to very stupid bullshit.

99% of Megatrons I see are completely unable to exist in the same room with smarter bots. If your vocabulary doesn’t consist primarily of “yes my liege” and “brilliant idea my liege”. He will. Well. Sometimes he will punch you, sometimes he will throw you out, sometimes he will just yell SILENCE!! His ego is made of glass and world thinnest paper. He also likes the concept of physical punishment.

He thinks it’s acceptable to beat other bots if they

1 - Betray him (somewhat understandable)

2 - Didn’t do their job good enough (really?)

3 - Walk past him while he’s in a bad mood (wtf)

4 - Made him feel stupid (sigh)

5 - for fun (bruh)

So yeah. Prowl would still probably thrive amongst the Decepticons but he would need to perform such a tricky mind gymnastics to convince Megatron to follow his plans and strategies. He would also regularly get yelled at I imagine lol.

Also Megatron’s critical thinking skills are so bad in most continuities it’s insane. Remember when in tfp Silas basically gave him a laser that could destroy anything from space and it didn’t perfectly work on the very first try? And he didn’t even for a second think that MAYBE he needs to try again? Yeah. If Prowl was there he would be having aneurism on the background.

Megatron’s ego weighs more than his brain I believe haha

I'M SORRY I AM DYING WHGWEQHDASKJASEWRGREWDS

[velvetvexations]

I need to talk about this'n cuz katrafiy* has a voice in publishing and could fuck me up if she wanted to.

First of all, about 'TRF' being a replacement for 'baeddel:

TRFs call themselves baeddel and associate with it caring that it was the name of a group that sexually abused other trans women, but people were upset about being called the thing they label themselves so I obliterated it from the vocabulary of most people opposed to them, and now it mainly lives on in the URLs of trans women who are fine identifying with a group that sexually abused other trans women.

So like...you're welcome? Literally thank me lol.

Secondly, what the fuck does race have to do with it? Where is that coming from? What about me using that term is racist? Even if you wanted to say I was doing Talia unfairly, is the meaning of racism now just when you're mean to a PoC for any reason in any context? Seriously think about that.

Then maybe think about the fact that, if you want to discuss racism, Talia is followed by a lot of racists. She herself is Indian and has every right to criticize Hinduism, but her grudge is so powerful she held on to one of the extremely rare times I briefly mentioned practicing Hinduism for months after it was posted to go on an unhinged rant about how Hinduism is a uniquely evil religion that "inspired the Nazis" and cannot be practiced ethically, which just like Arabic TERFs from Muslim countries talking about eradicating Islam, was uncritically swallowed by a very White audience. Like Katra, apparently.

Finally, Katra's slander rests on the idea that Talia Bhatt's book is "unpublished" - but does not explain how a book selling itself on making radical feminism fit trans politics and proudly identifying one's brand of politics trans radical feminism cannot then be used as a label for people who subscribe to those politics. They aren't angry with what the term implies because they're totally down with that, it's literally the description that's used to sell the book, they're just angry people say it with a negative tone! There's no conspiracy theory because they readily admit they're adopting radical feminism to a trans framework! But if you call them TRFs and you mean it as a bad thing, then it's a problem.

*I'll also briefly mention that the last time I spoke to her had been her telling me I'd "been in her notes" for awhile, to which I apologized and explained that I try to avoid reblogging the same person very often, but after checking it turned out this meant like, interacting with her publicly tagged posts about transfeminism three or four times over the course of a year, so I'm not really convinced she just doesn't like trans women disagreeing with her.

[putschki1969]

Hi Puts, I saw dramas news. TBH i'm totally disagree with all of those idea about "sides" "betrayal" etc concepts. From my perspective as an asian there's big difference in culture stuffs. Everyone of them, YKJ as well are just one musician. (Being able to live without messing with JP train rush hour are blessing enough LOL). they pursue nothing more than Arts. I think they has much less "self" concept nor "possession". I believe YKJ expect Kalafina's songs to be 気働き as well. :D

Hi there!!

I am not sure I completely understand what you want to convey with your message but I think I am getting the gist of it so I can hopefully provide a suitable response.

I also received a reply from @toshiroukajiura on THIS POST. It's very similar in nature to the above ask so I thought I'd include it here and just answer both in one go.

Your assumption with Yuki is so sad. Yuki kajiura is not a manager. Remember that. Hikaru is under a different management. And Kajiura invited Hikaru a lot of times. Kajiura is a soundtrack composer. Remember that.

All right, let's go...〈(•ˇ‿ˇ•)-→

All of this sounds like the two of you are trying to make excuses for Yuki. I don't know why you would "disagree" or consider it "sad" when I am simply pointing out the reality of things. Despite me saying that I wasn't sure if I could be unbiased, I think I've actually made quite fair assessments of the situation, especially in the above post. I tried my best to remain rational and look at everything from an objective point of view. Yuki Kajiura is not infallible and certainly not exempt from criticism, there's nothing wrong about pointing out certain problematic behaviours.

Common themes among those coming to Yuki's defense seem to be

that this is just a cultural thing that cannot be changed and is horribly misunderstood.

that Yuki wouldn't ever do anything petty like this because all she cares about is her art/music.

that she couldn't possibly be pulling the strings because she is in no position to do that.

I would argue that you are mistaken on all three accounts.

Re 1) Yes, their actions are indeed heavily influenced by cultural peculiarities, there's no doubt about that. None of the things we see them do are out of the ordinary for the Japanese entertainment industry. But just because these things are rooted in culture, doesn't automatically make them okay or provide an excuse. The non-confrontational approach with an emphasis on shunning, avoidance and denial, the continuous attempts at keeping things under wraps and sweeping all possible issues under the rug, the passive-aggressive behaviour towards each other with no direct insults but lots of subtle and targeted mini-attacks. Basically mean-girl tactics up to eleven. Very toxic, unhealthy and counterproductive.

This is the essence of the feud between Team Space Craft and Team Yuki. And yes, I keep calling it a "feud" for a reason. It is not a natural thing that should just be shrugged off as harmless. It is a long-lasting dispute between two parties fueled by wounded pride and fragile sensibilities. I have no doubt that Team Yuki was wronged at some point in all of this and I am sure that Team Space Craft has also felt slighted on multiple occasions but throughout all these years, both parties have just stubbornly kept this feud alive, unwilling to make any concessions that would finally resolve it. So yeah, even though I wish it wasn't the case, there are clearly "sides" in this feud and certain associations are seen as "betrayal" and get reprimanded as such. To deny this would just be ignorant.

Re 2) I used to think that Yuki prioritised her craft beyond anything else but recent events (in combination with some of her past decisions) have led me to believe otherwise. She basically abandoned Kalafina (arguably her best artistic project) all those years ago when she decided to leave Space Craft and follow Mori. Was it her prerogative to leave? Of course, she surely had her own interests in mind and thought it was for the best (it probably was, at least for her personally) but the fact remains that Kalafina and its members have had to bear the brunt of this decision and their interests have mostly been ignored. It must have been very obvious to Yuki that her departure would mean an end to Kalafina. With the girls not willing to continue the group without her but also unable to just follow her and revive Kalafina under Yuki's new management, they were faced with a dead-end and forced to make very hard decisions. So we know that the Kalafina project and its members did not mean enough to Yuki to try and arrange herself with the higher-ups at Space Craft. If we assume that all the rumours from back in the day contain at least a grain of truth, then Mori and Yuki did not leave because of some inconceivable or unforgivable thing being done to them, it was mostly petty stuff. For this reason, it is still baffling to me that they couldn't have found a way to navigate around their issues. While I would not expect the execs at Space Craft to have art and the interests of their employees as their first priority, I had hoped that Yuki at least would've felt a stronger commitment to those things, especially considering that the Kalafina project was her baby and the girls gave everything to bring her vision to life. But alas, that wasn't the case.

And even now when she claims that she's tried so much to make a Kalafina reunion possible but sadly with no success, I cannot help but wonder what exactly it was that she could have tried. It probably wasn't a proper attempt at reconciliation. Because let's be real here, I am sure Space Craft are difficult to deal with and they certainly have a bunch of outrageous demands but what could they possibly want that Yuki wouldn't be able to give them? They used to work together just fine with shared rights, shared revenues, etc. I find it hard to believe that something similar can't be recreated now (with different parameters and a little effort from both sides). Yuki is at the top of her career whereas Space Craft have pretty much reached the bottom of the barrel. Why not just be the better person, take pity on the petty old guys at Space Craft and give them what they want? There's no way that Space Craft aren't willing to negotiate something, I mean, at this point they have no other choice. They are probably not smart enough to know that they shouldn't be greedy with their demands in their lousy position but then again, their future existence is most likely contingent on Yuki making large concessions so I kinda understand that they would have rather audacious demands. My interpretation of all of this is that Yuki deliberately decides not to reach out to Space Craft due to being petty herself. If your pride is wounded, you will do a lot of things out of spite, even going as far as to sacrifice your own project.

After Keiko's exclusion from YKL, one has to once again wonder, what is more important to Yuki. Her craft and the quality of her music or her wounded pride? As I have explained in previous posts, I believe that this was mostly Yuki's decision and just a natural progression of the usual shunning process. I am willing to be proven wrong on the matter, maybe it turns out that Space Craft actually have entrapped Keiko in a super restrictive contract but for the time being, more signs point towards Yuki being behind this exclusion. Meaning, she would rather let go of the backbone of her music, instead of finding a solution with Space Craft.

By the way, I was never trying to insinuate that Yuki was completely indifferent to the members' problems. I think she does care about them, at least to some extent. We've seen her provide support on some occasions to Keiko as well as Hikaru and she has given them work opportunities but most of that was actually in her own interest so make of that whatever you will.

Re 3) I think some people may be underestimating the power she currently holds. Even back in her Space Craft days, she was left to her own devices and was pretty much given free creative rein by her manager Mori. She may not have been in charge of all organisational decisions but aside from that, she didn't have to deal with any restrictions. After leaving Space Craft, she founded "Fiction Junction Music", her very own management company. She is the head of this company so in a way, she is in fact a manager and more or less her own boss. Looking at the credit pages, FictionJunction Music is always listed as Yuki's management alongside Highway Star so we can assume they have some sort of shared management arrangement. When you check the Highway Star homepage, you'll notice that Yuki isn't listed under their regular clients, she is listed as "partner artist", this implies a peer to peer relationship. It's fair to come to the conclusion that she is the one who calls the shots when it comes to her activities and that the agency is merely there to help with formalities or to find some new jobs for her. Do they get a say in her decisions, yeah, probably but Mori strikes me as the type of guy who would gladly support Yuki's wish to exclude Keiko for aligning herself with Space Craft.

[quenthel]

There is so much discussion rn Abt romances in Avowed n how in pillars the romances were bad and RPGs need romances yadda yadda and honestly it's kind of crazy...

Like saying that they are going to lose out on players is probably not true bc if you are a type of player who plays RPGs for the romances then I don't think you are or ever were the target audience for this kind of rpg or pillars of eternity to begin with. Like ik sorry if this sucks to hear but pillars was always a story more focused on an old-school type adventure where you find out the secrets of the world while also being a game that builds upon this rpg legacy and tries to improve on the general ideas while at it.

Tbh to me it's a bit strange ppl are either like UGH I won't play this trash bc no romances!!! Vs. UGH you can just make up headcanons Abt romancing npcs like ok I suppose you can do this but why not just let a story speak for itself once it releases and why not interact with the narrative and setting.... Like pillars has a crunchy and rich fantasy setting you can get lost in imo and the writing of previous games was very good and ambitious. These games do interesting stuff with the basic fantasy premises and tell relatively focused stories about a couple of intertwined themes.

I think it's telling of the current social climate around RPGs (on Tumblr) that romances are dominating the discussion this heavily. And before you I get accused if anything no it's not "bad" to like romances. Romantasy especially is an incredibly popular genre of fiction. And it's popular for a reason.

But like what's weird to me is how so many ppl just very loudly dismissing a game that looks good so far just bc of no romances. It's like do you critique other games like this too? Do you want like idk Balatro to have romances in it too?

Personally I'm glad there are no romances. And it's not bc i don't like rpg romances (I do love them) or bc i think the romance of deadfire were lackluster (they were fine and fit the vibe of the game). Im glad bc that means the ppl who made this thing probably focused on the things they actually wanted to make and hopefully were passionate about. Playing games where you can feel that passion and which are not just churned out to be popular for popularity's (and money's!!) sake to me always feel more impactful and charming like that's the "good stuff".

Ofc Avowed is super fucking expensive even shockingly so. I can only hope some of that money goes to obsidian and not all of it gets drained into the pockets of EA. I also hope that the same kind of passion n ambitious writing we can see in pillars 1 & deadfire will be still here, but I won't speculate (yet) since I haven't seen the game (since it's not out). I think tempering your expectations about a game is a smart thing to do IG lol.

To be fair the marketing of this game is a mess already. And the pillars games were never rly super popular to begin with so ik a lot of ppl are confused and might be getting the wrong idea. Also we are off of the back of bg3, which was a game strategically focused on romances and characters even when it made the overall narrative suffer. It was also very popular (and a good game!) so it gave a lot of ppl (esp ppl who did not particularly played a lot of RPGs or video games in general) the idea that THIS is the "blueprint" for an rpg. But the thing is it is not.

Honestly I just don't rly get the scorn for this game lol. Idk. Temper your expectations and if a game is not for you then you can just say that n move on. Ofc it's good to be critical (I'm a hater too I get it) but idk msging random ppl who are excited Abt avowed about how you think this game will suck ass is perhaps a bit too much.

[thebreakfastgenie]

I did not have numbing and if I'd been offered it I would have said no because being injected in the cervix sounds worse than the IUD lmao. I think there was a pinch during the actual insertion?? The part that was hard for me was the speculum honestly, I have that issue with paps too. I can tolerate for a while but it hits a critical point of being in too long and just becomes intolerable. I was given medication a few hours in advance to soften my cervix and I think that helped a lot! Apparently this is not always done. I actually forgot to take it so they rescheduled my appointment for later in the day so I could lol, I had had to reschedule my insertion because I got COVID so I'd gotten the instructions and filled the prescription a couple weeks before and I think I was still COVID brained (also unmedicated ADHD at the time). They had me pre-med with ibuprofen too.

Okay I’m about ready to say I’m opposed to the whole “IUD insertion is horribly painful” thing. I keep seeing examples of women saying they’re terrified before their appointments and I think there’s a very really concern that talking about it this way will scare women off.

[artilite]

many many isabeaus... and some sloopis's of course :^) !!!!

i like consolidating my doodles so that's probably what i'm going to do for the most part from now on (^^ゞ!

[raiiny-bay]

Love, Dhes

Parker,

It's unfair how time with you feels so short. How the last 10 years have felt like no time at all. I like to think there are other versions of us out there, somewhere. Maybe in another timeline, another universe. I like to think we find each other no matter where we are or what we're doing. That we're together and happy and I get to love you in a dozen different lifetimes. That's what I hope, anyway. And I hope when this lifetime ends, we get to start over and do it all again. Because once just isn't enough. Not for me. Not with you.

I hope the next 10 years pass slower.

Love, Dhes

[tackykachowch]

Idk if I'm gonna get jumped for this but....Iiii don't know if it's really appropriate to call Vander Jinx's dad. He definitely was her guardian, with huge uncle energy for sure, but dad? Like, dad is something really personal and requires a high level of closeness, and they didn't seem to share that bond. Out of all the kids Powder seemed to be the most removed from him and share very little traits/interests with him, and after growing up we don't see Jinx care about him at all. So, idk, to call him her dad seems more like a fanservice to me rather than what can be confirmed by the show.

He's defo her dad in the au, tho, because there he would spend a lot more time with her and because of Vi's death pay more attention to her, therefore tightening their bond.

UPD: I mean, Vander isn't even a part of her hallucinations. Now, you could argue that it's too traumatic for her even to remember him as is seen in season 1 ep9, but I think it's the opposite, actually. Knowing Silco he probably yapped about Vander all the time (and he literally does this in ep5), so Jinx definitely remembers him and thinks of him to some extent. But why then his hallucination appeared only once? Well, I think it only happened because Jinx was under extreme pressure already, plus she recently had a shimmer operation, which could've worsened her mental state, hence Vander appearing as a hallucination. Again, this is just how I see it, I may be wrong, but I do think this view of their relationship is rational enough.

[maythedreadwolftakeyou]

(DATV thoughts with spoilers ahead; i think my tags will keep it filtered but just in case it doesn't since i dont want this in the actual game tags)

i just... man. i don't have a well formulated thought for this yet (and its my PERSONAL OPINION and other people can feel as different as they want, this is not an attack) but it keeps bouncing around my head, so. i know the popular thing right now is coming up with in-universe justifications for The Pantry Almost-Kiss Scene in ways that imply Lucanis didn't mean it/it doesn't represent him as a person/he was Faking It.

and i just don't like any of them. they make me sad!!!!!! i don't like the idea that one of the like 4 romance scenes we get in this game is him Pretending in some way, even if he does at that point like Rook back at least somewhat. None of the justifications i've seen make me feel Better about that being the point where we declare him as a romantic interest, which is what it is in the game, functionally. It doesn't lock you in yet but that point IS where the game says "they will take your flirting more seriously now". I did those same scenes for Davrin, Emmrich, and Taash and this is the formula the game uses (the "interrupted almost-kiss/confession" happens for almost all of the companions).

so if the answer for Lucanis' is "actually he stopped because he Didn't like what he was doing/feel that way yet" or that he felt he had to pretend for Rook's sake... it's kind of a letdown you know? esspecially when it comes right after what seems like an actually authentic moment (dispelling his "perfectly gathered clouds of doom"). Because, at that point in the game from my/Rook's perspective, it was like he finally was reciprocating. It made me hope that he'd acknowledge whatever was between him & Rook more in future scenes, especially because you get so little else from him at any other point, in terms of flirting back/showing you he IS interested. like up to that point I felt kind of bad for continuing to flirt at him, when he'd just change the subject right after! if someone did that in real life i would take it as a hint to stop. This is pixels and not real people so I didn't but they have done "reluctant/fearful interest" better in other characters if that's truly what they were going for in this one.

so after finishing the romance and getting the rest of content... idk. I don't like saying "one of the major chunks of characterization we get needs to be Thrown Out Actually because he was Pretending". because it's not like he or Rook ever actually address it in game--you just don't get to talk about feelings until some dialogue choices only in the act 3 romance scene, and then his speech at endgame (not even a full conversation, so much as his personal declaration). like it takes until the VERY end of the game for him to say the thing about "he was afraid to want you", but that comes after you've already hooked up, even.

I think truly what annoys me is that it's a story choice that can only make sense in HINDSIGHT not AS PLAYING. Only once you have all the scenes can you say "this one is out of character" and then you either have to accept it as bad writing, or come up with some in-universe justification to explain it... and so far none of the in universe ones feel good to me. i wish they did because maybe then I'd be less annoyed, rip. but at the end of the day i think even if there was some intent there, it was a poor choice for his story arc, because it doesn't effectively convey anything... and the reason why we can project a lot of different explanations onto it is simply because it is never addressed again (and again, Lucanis Dellamorte is NOT A PERSON he is a CHARACTER used to further a story for you the player, and so the reasons I don't like this choice are story-level and not a dig at how real life people feel or act).

So yeah at the end of the day. that is simply not a narrative device I would ever personally use in this way on a player/reader. certain kinds of hindsight revelations have their place (see: what the devs tried to do with Varric though I also think that falls apart on close inspection, but at least it has justification in-universe), but for a romance it just makes me embarrassed for Rook. In a game where you don't have nearly as many back-and-forth conversations with characters and have to resort to eavesdropping on them talking to each other, it's sad that one of the like 5 times you actually get to talk to Lucanis one on one we're maybe supposed to believe he wasn't being authentic, and also that Rook can't respond to this ever. It would be different if it had any kind of follow up, imo. or honestly as i've said before i would rather it have been swapped out with something entirely different or where we get to talk about their feelings instead, before i get labeled as one of the "people mad he's not Zevran 2.0/a sexy latin sterotype".

But having to step back to player-level analysis versus in-character analysis when looking at his whole romance arc just feels sloppy. but i'd much rather stick to "bad writing" than "intentional character choice" in terms of how to interpret the scene I guess, at this point, for poor Rook's sake. and i know people disagree with when I've said that before bc as much as I love Mary Kirby in other areas, she has said many times that she doesn't like writing romance, and I think it really does show here. As much as I love Lucanis and the scraps we got I wish I didn't have to do so much filling-in-the-blanks on our own.

[celtrist]

I really want to see a more fucked up version of Charlie in canon. Like, okay, I am a die-hard for sweet bubbly girls in media. But I always see how some people make Charlie actually, oh I dunno... demonic? And it's so refreshing for her type of character. I could honestly see her having low empathy (and we kinda see this with how she handled Angel's situation or even Vaggie's nervousness about taking control on an activity). An exploration of that trait (if it was intended) would be interesting to see for a protagonist, especially when her main goal is about helping others. I would love to see her actually have a level of difficulty in understanding others' feelings from the other residents, sinners, and even her father.

But give her a fucked up side. Not a "she gets more power when she's angey uwu", but a "oh, she's a little fucked in the head". It would give so much to her character that she just doesn't have.

@/murmurmurena (don't wanna bother them so slash there we go) has some fun ideas with Charlie. I highly encourage people to check their stuff out! So many fun dark ideas with her character while also still keeping to her canon personality pretty well! Personally, I think Charlie being a bit more naive to her own messed up traits would work best but her also being aware of these traits can make for some interesting character for her.

THIS FIC, "A Game Between You and I". RIGHT HERE WITH THE FIRST CHAPTER. A bit of spoil for the fic here: but I love how they handled Charlie’s absolute ignorance as to why the idea of Russian roulette is horrifying to Angel Dust. It doesn't feel like her being intentionally malicious or aware that she's the odd man out here. This is also a pretty old fic going by only the pilot, but the point still stands that it was such a fun take for her character!

Charlie is one of my favorite characters in the show in part of the POTENTIAL she could have as being the most bubbly sweetheart character while also being the most messed up character in the show. I can't say I have strong confidence with the show's writing and fully expect them to stick with Charlie being the "nice girl but oh no, don't get her angry or she gets scarwy". Which isn't bad for a character mind you, there's just so much more potential to Charlie outside of that trope, especially when you get into the theories of her either being a doll, Roo's biological daughter, or what have you. And for the MAIN CHARACTER of the show, it would be not only interesting but also bring the spotlight back to her.

There's really no question that the side characters steal the show, particularly all the male characters. If I'm honest, Charlie does not feel like she gets a lot of love from the show itself when she's supposed to be the main character. She feels far more flat compared to the rest of the characters (again, the male cast in this "female-lead" show has more depth than most of the female cast currently. I wouldn't be pointing this tidbit concerning the genders of characters if it weren't for the fact Viv defended Helluva's lack of development with their female cast by saying "Hazbin is a female-lead show and Helluva is a male-lead" and Hazbin ended up with it not feeling female lead (to me) and the male cast just completely stealing the show. I don't normally care about gender stuff, especially since I do personally lean interest towards male characters. But using one show as a defense for poor development of the female characters, and then that show not really holding up with no very interesting well-developed feeling female characters irritates me. It's just very clear that these shows don't seem to care much about the female cast :/)

If you like how Charlie is written that's totally fine. PERSONALLY, I just think they're missing so much opportunity with her character by just making her the standard female character type. I honestly don't have a lot of faith they'll actually do something with Charlie's character though. She's a pretty static character in S1 being the same from start to end. Not changing or learning anything to create any development. What does the end of season Charlie do that start of season Charlie wouldn't do? Fight back? Because we see with the pilot (which is the “first episode”) that Charlie does fight people if pushed like with Katie Killjoy and even Valentino. Static characters can work in media depending on the show or their role. But Charlie is the MC of a show about “bettering one's self”. So to have her as a static with not a lot of strong dilemmas for herself (like we see with Angel Husk Al and even Vox) seems silly. Plus, considering Hazbin is telling a whole story and it's not a fun episodic thing, characters are expected to grow on some level. Or else, what was the point of their hero's journey?

[mrs-gauche]

IT'S OCTOBER!!!!

I have no idea what's happening out there, I'm living in this isolated semi offline bubble to avoid spoilers and it's killing me, but WE'LL BE PLAYING THE NEXT DRAGON AGE *THIS* MONTH. AFTER TEN. WHOLE. YEARS. HOW FUCKING CRAZY IS THAT. IT STILL DOESN'T FEEL REEEAL.

[clarissaweasley-10]

reblog if you love both Keefe and the other characters equally (or to an extent equally).

[cosmicgamer]

I'll never understand why the TOH crew changed Luz getting bullied for her weirdness that's not actually hurting anybody in the pilot to her being an actual menace who's usually not properly called out for her bullshit because she's just misunderstood

[butchvamp]

i'm working my way through the final companion quests and i finished Bellara's last night. i feel like my criticism of her story is the same, broader critique i've already discussed which is that she's never really given any time or space to reckon with the truth of the elven gods, she's never allowed any real sympathy or a crisis of faith or even just a genuine conversation about having to literally kill her gods that she's spent her entire life studying... this quest almost gets there, but it's once again... hindered by racism.

i would have loved this quest otherwise, in general Bellara is one of my favorite companions and her character is one of the strongest in the game. plus i like a good sibling dynamic, and i loved her scenes with Cyrian and even the final funeral procession. but the context they're in is frustrating. we don't need to teach Bellara the dangers of pursuing elven history, we already know, she already knew even before this, and now the game has completely demonized the Evanuris beyond a doubt and even blamed Bellara for it herself. we don't need Bellara to "learn her lesson." it's redundant and racist, especially the final choice!

this choice (Destroy the Archive or Preserve It) should NOT be up to Rook. this is when faction and companion approval could have come into play, but unfortunately the reputation system in this game is basically nonfunctional. if it did actually matter, then maybe if Rook has high reputation with the Veil Jumpers, Bellara could ask their opinion, but otherwise, why would she leave the fate of a priceless link to elven history up to Just Some Guy? especially if Rook isn't even elven!

Dalish culture is still valuable, it's worth respect and worth preserving regardless of the Evanuris. this confrontation with Anaris should have made her even more determined to do exactly that, to embrace and protect her culture and explore the truth of their history within the Archive, to share it with her people and keep them safe, rather than just blindly destroy it. this could have been her big emotional catharsis moment, with Rook there to encourage her but otherwise let her be the one to make her own choice and ultimately stop Anaris and save the Archive. maybe Cyrian does always die, but he's her link to the Archive that strengthens her resolve regardless. and depending on how Rook approached it (insisted that she would have to kill him versus encouraging her to try and get through to him) it could result in Bellara either opening up and sharing more about the Archive or hardening and closing herself and the Archive off completely. the funeral procession could change depending as well.

i don't know how the funeral procession changes currently, if you destroy the Archive, but if you save it, i do really appreciate those final scenes with her. we even get actual acknowledgment of the Exalted Marches and the reality of the current elves and their enslavement. Bellara finally gets to express herself and participate in her culture without having to feel guilty or apologize. i just wish she was given this respect beyond this single scene, and that she had more of a voice overall and could challenge both Harding and even Solas, and that the game didn't have to punish her before we got here.

[waltwhitmansbeard]

not to engage in Discourse™️, but i would like to once again remind people that your local dnd actual play show is not a scripted television show that can or should follow the normal rules of narrative flow. this is a collaborative storytelling effort that requires the careful scheduling and coordination of a lot of people. the crown keepers deviation was scheduled before fcg's death. matt couldn't just fuck with all those guests' schedules bc something inconvenient happened just before they were slated to come on. i cannot say for certain, but i'm willing to bet real american dollars that the live show was scheduled and the venue was booked before fcg died too (tho maybe not, i'm not an expert in venue scheduling), but what better place to have the new sam character drop than in a theatre full of your most adoring fans? the most logical time and place to do it? maybe not, idk. but it sure was exciting for everyone watching. not sure when this downfall three-shot was initially scheduled, but there's no way in hell matt and brennan haven't been working on it together for MONTHS, if not even a year. sometimes, things happen when they happen bc that's when you get people in a room together. that's kinda the whole thing about dnd, why so many campaigns fizzle out—scheduling is fucking hard. it wasn't convenient when tal had to miss the session after the huge briarwood dinner fiasco in c1, which was leading directly into the arc that dealt pretty exclusively with his backstory, but that is life! ppl are busy! things happen when they can happen! if you don't like that events and story beats aren't hitting precisely when it would be most narratively satisfying for them to do so, perhaps dnd/ttrpg actual plays aren't for you! sometimes the dice tell the story, and sometimes the google calendar does! that's life!