#i just kind of ache

[selescope]

watched a very distressing movie and like it’s not hitting me that bad but it is slowly setting in on me and like why did it need to do that

[skellydun]

who wants to lay on top of me like a weighted blanket and fix me

[shalom-iamcominghome]

If anyone is interested, please feel free to light a digital candle through Illuminate. I got a name a few years back, and it's a name I won't forget. May every name we have found be a blessing. May their names never be forgotten. May we never forget.

Never again means now.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Good morning, Sleepyhead.

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[fallen-mario-bros-au]

Decided to play around with the designs for fallen Mario and Luigi. Their personalities are the same, although mostly based off the Mario and Luigi games, which is why the letters on their hats are black. Their sweaters were also important. You can't be a fallen human without a cute sweater. Both got a bit scuffed up when they fell, but thankfully they weren't injured or anything.

I also wanted to play around with soul colors because I had no idea what I was gonna do with those. Ultimately, I decided to keep them red and green so they could be easily distinguished, but Mario has a more orange red for determination + bravery (and as a reference to the Firebrand) while Luigi's is more of a teal-ish green to reference kindness + patience and also his iconic Thunderhand. I was really worried about using the same colors on top of their clothes but after playing around with the lighting I decided I really liked the look.

But yeah I feel like it fits them pretty well! Lemme know what y'all think!

[kyouka-supremacy]

Can you imagine the drama that would spawn during Atsushi and Akutagawa's wedding preparations on whether inviting Dazai or not

[moghedien]

If Lae’zel raises that egg, the kid is gonna end up as a bard and it will be 100% because of her influence

[maingh0st]

@belabellissima's tags on this post deserve a post of their own, i—

[hilema]

gosh working out really makes a difference

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

words will never be able to express just how much solace and comfort the submarine soundtrack brings me 💙

[ldpdlfiles]

listened to the button house archives audio book and i cant stop thinking about the captain and his diary entries.

particularly the one from June 6th 1940.

this is his personal diary. no one to have access to read it but him. he writes about havers leaving for the north africa front. how he couldn’t dissuade him. says he hopes the war will be over by christmas. and then he rips the page out and crumples it up.

and i cant help but wonder how many times hes done that. ripped out an entry bc of the contents. did he do it for fear of someone reading them or because of his own emotions? has he had to hold back tears while writing…

[blamemma]

Daniel Ricciardo on being back in the Red Bull simulator (x)

[a-force-dyad-in-space]

🎇BREAKING NEWS🎇 Yi City Man Known for Mass Murder is Speechless and Shy as He Experiences Kindness for the First Time in His Life

More news at 8!

[domsaysstuff]

I find it so funny that both steddie and ronance are Eddie and Robin looking at KiNg Steve Harrington and Nancy "suCh a PRisS" Wheeler and realizing that they're actually really badass and kind and sweet and having a lot of gay feelings about that as they should

[mitamicah]

An aromantic autistic reading of Joker Out's "Bluza"/"the Blouse"

I have a few words about Bluza. The Blouse.

When I first heard the title, I felt a connection to this song yet in a very tongue-in-cheek way. Because I read the working title was a nod to the white holed sweater blouse (the slut shirt) Bojan forgot at Jere’s place last autumn. But then thanks to JokerOutSubs I realized that this song really speaks to me in another way.

Disclaimer: I am speaking about this from an autistic aroace point of view and as a person who has masked most their lives and doesn’t drink. I hope to explain why this matters in the post below.

The lines that especially spoke to me are these: Ja ko pijana budala Ali čaše nisam popio Jamislim da sam se zaljubio u tebe

I’m acting like a drunk idiot But I haven’t had a single glass I think I’ve fallen in love with you

As a person who has spend most my life being critical about what to say, do, and how I show of myself to people I see the drunkenness described here not as literal but as a form of unmasking. When you find that one person you feel so comfortable around that you know that they won’t leave you or care if you stop being presentable in the eyes of society.

The result is that you may seem drunk and out of character when you are close to them. Drunk as in unlike yourself but also much more yourself. You dare to be authentic and to be silly and vulnerable because this person next to you gets you. No alcohol you could consume would fill you with as much giddiness as being with this person does. There is something about this one person that just speaks to you and let you know that you are safe.

While not having been drunk myself this is what I expect is the feeling most drunk people are searching for: the experience of not caring about what other people might think about them anymore. They just exist outside time and space in a bubble of bliss.

The person in the song is that for Bojan. His bubble of bliss – his safe space.

I’ve been lucky enough to have people like that too for small periods of time. And just like the next line I have felt very strongly connected to the person in those moments thinking “is this was love feels like?”. And here I don’t necessarily mean romantic attraction/love. I mean love as in a deeper, more profound level. The love that is outside of bodily desire. It is two spirits – two beings finding a home in the other person. A home where you can be giddy and drunk without having touch a single drink.

It is no secret that I love the idea of queer platonic love. When I read this, I read it as queer platonic. I read it as beautifully strange, brotherly, romantic, and platonic all at once.

The chorus kind of develops this feeling and adds and aromantic layer to it: Baš ja Koji nisam verovao Da za nekim biću lud

Yes, me who didn’t believe I would be crazy about someone

I read this as a very much an aspec experience.

You may have gone most of your life feeling othered for not experiencing those feelings of romantic attraction the world around you constantly tell you that you should.

Then this person comes along. This person that is your haven, that you can fool around with and open up around. There’s something that seems different, seems honest and so it brings you that feeling of bliss I mentioned earlier. That feeling the world around you have tried to tell you exists for years, yet you never believed would happen to you.

You may have believed yourself to be broken or maybe the world around you too much for seemingly being crazy about love. But now in this moment of bliss, drunk without having drunk, you get it. You want to be with this person, do all the silly things the media tells you are romantic. Not because you are forced to but because it would mean spending more time with your person. And every little second you can spend with your person feels like a blessing.

That is my take on the song at least. Thank you for reading.

[keepthetension]

still stuck on mhok's trauma, unsurprisingly. i keep thinking about the opening scenes of this show, showing us day losing his sight, and mhok losing rung. i really thought that the show would spend equal time and care on both

my first post about this show was pointing out that the first shot of day is a close up of his eyes, and the first time we see mhok, he's holding something in his mouth. and i thought it was so interesting that we see mhok gagged, because society generally doesn't care what people who've been incarcerated have to say. or poor people. and by and large, it doesn't care about the voices of traumatized people, either

and i was so curious to see what the show was going to do with that. i can't believe the show itself was never really interested in what mhok has to say

and i'm stuck on mhok's time in hawaii. the show highlighted over and over again how poor he is, and we know that he didn't like studying. what are his english skills like? we saw singha there, and i think one other thai person. was that the extent of his social circle? he seemed pretty happy to leave hawaii behind, so did he make no new friends? did he spend his days off just sitting in his room by himself, the way day did when he went to songkla with mhok?

i assume he and porjai were still in touch, but he moved abroad at a time when his ptsd was getting worse, and in the wake of a terrible breakup, and he just walked all of that off? alone???

feeling overly protective and over-responsible is absolutely an understandable trauma response for mhok, but you know what else is? losing a relationship, and feeling like you HAVE to go back and fix it, and that if you can just get a do-over, you'll be able to do everything perfectly this time, and you'll get everything right, and everything will be okay! this makes more sense to me in the final episode than the idea of mhok and day having a happily ever after does