#i isolate myself
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Middle America by Gregory Crewdson
#gregory crewdson#photography#I’ve been a fan of Crewdson far before I began taking photos myself#I’d love to work with actual people but I’m terribly shy and I have very few friendships#hopefully maybe someday#no one captures the liminal spaces and isolation of middle America quite like Crewdson#midwest#rural america#american gothic#liminal
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not to demon post but like. sometimes i think about the "friends" label and the fact that it's a little bit of a haha in-joke but also... i mean. when dan said he didnt have a best friend for the first 18 years of his life he meant it yknow. like i do think that out of all the possible labels he's used, soulmates husbands arch enemies furniture who the fuck knows, best friends is amongst the most meaningful... if you never had a best friend and then met him and he stayed in that spot for fifteen years the fact that he's also the love of your life can maybe be just a bit of a bonus.
#dnp#dan and phil#phan#my point with this is that like. growing up not having a best friend is so devastating and isolating#not dating is whatever. not everyone dates. but it's expected that you have friends! it's expected that in 18 years you connect enough -#- with someone to call them Your Best Friend!#so idk. i think for dan to go 18 years without that. and then to click with phil so perfectly. sometimes i do think the best friend label -#- is actually the most meaningful out of the bunch. For Him.#i just think he's very very happy that the love of his life is his best friend and that his best friend is the love of his life.#anyways im gonna make myself cry. whatever LOSERS. whatever SOULMATES. WHO CARES. not me!!!!
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reminder that making time for your friends, even when you're tried and socialising feels overwhelming is important to do every so often. it's especially important to do this actually.
time alone can be good, for a time, but humans are social creatures and we need to talk to people, there's nothing wrong with that!!
sometimes the more time you spend alone the more your brain will tell you to stay alone. that's not true, you're allowed to (and should!!) see people that are important to you. sometimes that alone can be surprisingly healing.
#hello again!!#ive been in a bit of a SLUMP and started isolating myself but i just visited a friend and saw a show they worked on#and then stopped at a cute little coffee shop on the way home and seeing people being kind to each other and my best friend#was exactly what i needed!! truth be told i secretly hoped this trip would get cancelled somehow but im so so glad it didn't!#feeling very much in love with the world again <333#reminders#social anxiety#love letters to you
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some business to take care of
#i was tempted to caption this as she was a skater boy and she was also another skater boy but#duck scribbles#midoyuzu#enstars#whats up guys im being embarrassing again on main#been wanting a new phone wallpaper and this was born. its the lesbian version though im not showing that#midori takamine#yuzuru fushimi#yuzumido#ensemble stars#also have additional doodles that r kind of corny and im too ashamed to add into the main post so i might add on a reblog or maybe not#midterms were so awful i had to keep reminding myself i can go ham drawing whatever i want once im done. and naturally its this#anyways ive always liked midos city rider fit it suits her so well#always wanted to find a good one to pair w it and the wink killer 2nd half xscout was toooo good i was inspired immediately#finally could use this good ref pic ive had saved since forever i need to draw backgrounds more too it was rather fun somehow#mental state has been yoyoing an insane degree lately like come on i dont need to be reminded i am a useless hunk of meat every other day#with nothing good going for them. college is amazing at reminding me of such god bless#i have bad tendencies to self isolate behind the excuse of concentrating that i am trying to fix . but its hard to get back when i do#not to mention the entire Big Event happening over in good ol amerika serikat!!! my apathy is naturally immense#but whats some peace of mind here and there idk. im gonna read yuri
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JEAN ARTHUR in THE MORE THE MERRIER (1943) dir. George Stevens A FOREIGN AFFAIR (1948) dir. Billy Wilder
#filmedit#filmgifs#filmblr#classicfilmedit#classicfilmblr#classicfilmsource#cinemaspast#jean arthur#the more the merrier#a foreign affair#1943#1948#1940s#parallels#*mygifs#happy bday jean <3#i will voluntarily self isolate myself and give my cat a million kisses just for you <3
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i often think about kevin adjusting to life outside the nest. we see how unfathomable a different lifestyle is for jean after 5 years, and kevin grew up there
how long did it take until he got used to seeing the sun every day
how often does he have nightmares. does he look at the other bed every time he wakes up
was he surprised that the foxes were allowed to eat, drink, wear whatever they want
did he learn from watching the foxes practice that their playing style isn't quite as violent and that there's no 'contrition'
did he expect to get violently punished when he started doubting evermore's teachings even in the privacy of his own mind
has he started learning how to be a person outside of his ability to play
#my posts#my aftg posts#aftg#all for the game#kevin day#the foxhole court#the sunshine court#aftg meta#i also think about how isolating his position in the nest must've been#and how foreign it must feel to finally have people in his corner#people who see him for who he is and still consider him family#ok i just made myself cry
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Just watched boys night. Will never be normal again.
#please they are so deeply awkward with each other it’s my favorite thing ever#these kids were entirely socially isolated and lonely until they met each other#I’m so glad that they just kind of don’t know how to be friends sometimes#PLEASE#popular kids who are so cool and also SO not cool I love them#the bad boys#(some of them aren’t even boys if you think about it..)#fantasy high#d20#d20 fantasy high#dimension 20#d20 fanart#fantasy high fanart#fhjy#fabian fantasy high#fabian seacaster#fabian aramais seacaster#gorgug fantasy high#gorgug thistlespring#riz fantasy high#riz gukgak#fh#the bad kids#I’m playing a game right now where I try to let myself post doodles instead of only finished work and it’s so much harder than I thought#undescribed#not described#my art
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[ cw: death mention / sibling death mention / isolation / ]
Thinking about how Leo’s portal and teleportation powers have both directly (and in one instance, indirectly) been the cause of him being separated from his brothers at least four times now.
There’s that time in Portal Jacked, where his inexperience leads to his portal being messed with and his brothers ending up in Tahiti.
There’s the Bad Timeline, where Leo’s portaling led to them losing the Key, therefore indirectly leading to the apocalypse and in turn, ending with Leo being the last of his brothers alive (though just for a few minutes.)
There’s him teleporting him and Krang into the Prison Dimension, cutting him off from his family so wholly that the only way to fix this was a literal mystic miracle.
Then there’s the comic, where Leo’s powers act up again and make him lose months of time completely isolated from everyone and everything he knows.
Just, looking at all of this, it’s like the universe gave him the powers of distance on purpose to test him (and his bros), literally seeing if they can overcome unimaginable space and still make it back together. Imagine if it doesn’t stop here, and Leo has to learn to either deal with the occasional complete isolation or deal with time travelers coming back to stop some terrible event his powers (whether directly or indirectly) have caused, events that always lead to separation in some way, shape, or form.
It’s worth noting, too, that his portals often led to accidental separation, but his teleportation was the one power of his that was used to isolate himself on purpose…and was also the one that in any other scenario would have been the most permanent.
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#rottmnt headcanons#rise leo#rise comic spoilers#tmnt 40th anniversary#adding those last two just in case even though it’s been months lol#anyway hiiii I still think about Leo all the time and the Implications of his abilities#I truly do think their powers matter sooooo much to their characters frfr#and it’s very very interesting to me that Leo’s whole lineup has everything to do with space and distance#and he himself is constantly forced away from his family#no but imagine this happening all the time - like…his abilities almost PURPOSEFULLY causing his separation in some way#maybe as a test? to test his and his family’s bonds? their bonds are what ultimately power them after all#Leo in particular has lacking faith in himself and his powers despite his confidence in other areas#and I wonder if that comes through in his abilities#I love Leo getting better and better at his powers but the innate self isolating/self destructing nature of them never leaves#Leo: no I don’t wanna be vulnerable#His Powers: no? but what if *this*#Leo: w h y#Leo: actually what if I do it MYSELF *teleports himself into the Prison Dimension*#His Powers: 👍#Mikey: 👎 ⁉️⁉️⁉️⁉️ NO????#leos over the years isolating themselves for training and/or self punishment indirectly leading to rise leo being cursed#(also I’m still gone haha this just hit by brain and I’m too tired to not write it out lmao)
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Some really rough expression sheets I did for fun today! They're really coming along - it's almost like we're professionals hah
Hey! Dahlia has a last name finally! Do you like the logo?
#The organizing is the hardest part#hiring a concept artist made me realize how....messy it all was aha#but here!!#For the sake of future concepting I did some isolated expressions of the crew!#they are not yet finished even pfff#Im always getting ahead of myself#Bailey - they will HATE you#Dahlia - needs a big hug#Lulu - my handsome little gremlin#WB - ....you're doing great buddy!#Nimrod - punt sized <33#corduroy stew#nimrod honorary stew#wb stew#lulu stew#dahlia babel
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it’s that time of the year (sketch dump time)
stiles is talking nonsense and derek’s amused
#sterek#derek hale#stiles stilinski#teen wolf#eternalsterek#ive been feeling like shit lately#and i keep isolating myself#miss my cats#sorry the last time i was here was like 3 months ago#my art#cant wait for down by contact part 4 bitches i noticed siand saying in the comments it’s happening rn#i guess i have a reason to keep living
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trying to cheer myself up
#messyr#doodle#artists on tumblr#mood#i draw myself a lot to express mood/emotions bc irl i don't/ hardly express jackshit HAHAHA#my classmates always gets surprised how expressive my drawings are or how i am in media/works when 90 percent of the time i look emotionles#idk whats going on w school anymore bc i isolated myself lately due to intense mood swings and it's stuck to its low lmao#nobody has to see that
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absolutely fascinated by young dee who is criminally under-discussed so here is my dissertation on what happened in her college years (ft. dr. gainer, setting her roommate on fire, being institutionalized)/my idea for a fic that I will almost certainly never write/my way too serious take on a few throwaway dee lore lines
timeline background: we know that dee majored in psychology ('charlie got molested') and got "three fourths" of the way in (meanwhile dennis finished his psych minor.) assuming this was a four year program, I'm gonna guess that in her third year she got institutionalized and most likely had to drop out ('gun fever too: still hot'.) we also know that she had her back brace until she was twenty ('underage drinking'), so I'm guessing that means she got her back brace off in her third year.
we know that dennis fancied himself a psychologist since he was young, but I think dee did too. in particular I think she was wary and interested in her brother's psychology; she seems very aware of his psychopathy and bpd in 'making dennis reynolds a murderer' and 'psycho pete returns.' in my head she's been interested in dennis' psychology since they were kids and she saw him snapping crows necks. so instead of forcing her way into acting school, she studied psychology to better understand her brother (and also deep down, herself, who is very much the other side of the same fucked up coin.) it also meant she could tell herself she could study her characters even better when she became an actress.
i think she put in (her version of) genuine academic effort to get in, fuelled kind of by spite (remember the way she studied that thick medical book in 'hero or hate crime' or her very quick math in 'boggs: ladies reboot'). she studies books and gets cricket to quiz her and she still fails to get into penn. but frank always pitied her (i think she was his favorite of the twins-remember "let your sister into the gang", "that's my girl!", "i'm sorry the grift didn't work out, sweetie") so he shells out cash to get her in, but also to get her away from home so he has to deal with her even less.
dennis wants to do anything dee does but better and he wants to keep her close by (to watch her crash and burn, and also because he's weirdly possessive-see 'the gang broke dee' "i'm your select!"). and obviously he's barbara's favorite. so barbara gives him money to get in too. she also gets him into a frat and pays for his classes and his rent and everything he needs. dee has to live in a dumpy dorm with a female roommate.
but college presents dee a chance to moult her previous place in life where she was known as a monster (remember how insistent she was that "people can change!" in 'franks pretty woman'. I think dees always wanted to believe she can shed that feeling she's inferior, but she never has). in my head her female roommate is basically normal-has real friends of her own, mentally stable, attractive-which is exactly what dee craves. dee wants to be popular and well liked and she wants to infiltrate her roommates life, imitate her, be in the Cool group. and she places all her hopes on a friendship with the roommate but dee has never navigated real female friendships before, not with someone like her. deep down she also wishes she found what dennis found in mac, whatever it was, because ever since dennis met mac he's never been as close to her. and i do think dee is some flavor of queer. and the roommate is well liked in the way that dee admires and envies. so there is that blurriness between wanting to be her and wanting to be with her. in my head her roommate looks like the woman from dee's fantasy in 'the gang saves the day' (and they both represent that promise of escape from dee's shitty life).
dee is so desperate for the roommates approval and her love and her life that she goes insane, copying and flattering and competing with her. ever the shitty actress, she tries to emulate her, but comes off as manic and creepy. and maybe her roommate is nice enough to not completely shun her, recognizing that she's struggling. maybe in dees mind they actually are becoming friends when her roommate asks things like "are you okay?"
and dee has to talk about her plan with dennis because he's the only person who would Get It. and she makes it sound like it's almost working. dennis feels jealous and worried and threatened that maybe dee might actually be seen as normal, especially when she gets her back brace off in the third year. so dennis fucks her roommate, more of a show that he owns and controls each and every pathetic part of dee’s life than anything else. and so that dee knows she'll never be as good as him, she'll never as easily charm people as dennis does. (or at least he tells her he does).
to prove that To Someone dee is Good Enough, and so desperate for attention, dee (who's been groomed all this time) enters a sexual relationship with her professor dr. gainer. she tells herself she has the power in it, that she seduced him ("he didn't molest me. i had sex with him 'cause i wanted to.") and she has a mental break, because the thing she told herself held her back from being loved (her back brace) is finally gone by now and yet she still feels like a monster, and the only scrap of "love" she can get is from her professor.
and then she can't take the fact that she can steal her roommates clothes, can emulate her sexual prowess (in dee's own fucked up, delusional way), and still neither be well liked like her nor be loved by her. so maybe dee will always be a monster. so dee tried to burn her roommate in her bed, because she represented the promise of change and popularity, and that promise was a lie and dee's effort was for nothing. and she's institutionalized.
and i think there was kind of a falling out between the twins and their parents, because barbara wants to abandon dee but dennis can't help but visit her. and frank doesn't even step foot in a place that reminds him of his traumatic childhood, and avoids dee even more than he used to because she is his childhood mirror image. so the family becomes even more fractured and estranged.
and maybe dee becomes medicated and slowly crawls her way halfway to normal by the first season (her acting classes are so well-adjusted, taking part in healthy hobbies of her!). until her father comes back into her life and everything falls apart <3
side note, even though dee is crushingly lonely-"I just got a cat 'cause I wanted something to hang out with. I don't have, you know, a roommate or anything, and I don't really have anyone to talk to..."-AND she struggles to pay rent whenever frank cuts her off, i hc that she refused to ever get a roommate in particular female roommate again after this because both her internalized misogyny got worse and she was afraid of what would happen (what she would do) again.
#THIS IS FOR THOSE WITH THE DEE BRAIN ROT WHO SEES HER AS A SHAKESPEAREAN TRAGIC HEROINE WHO JUST WANTS TO BE THE BELOVED COMEDIC RELIEF#also no way in HELL dee was genuinely ever like nice roller rink ep dee. in my head that was the guys absolving themselves for turning dee#even more traumatized and isolated and jaded thru their treatment of her. bc it was obviously a freak accident shes Like That right#(in the sense of like unreliable narrator/faulty memory/lack of any care or attention given to dees life)#dee reynolds#iasip#iasip headcanons#nina.rambles#posts with an audience of me myself and i#tw grooming#tw mental illness#not sure how to tag this!#to me she is the main character.#dennis reynolds#bc there is heavy mention of him too#trash twins#frank reynolds#barbara reynolds
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You know what drives me crazy? The fact that Camp Creteceous has an episode called "Chaos Theory". It's season 2 episode 8 by the way. And ik we should be aware already cause we all watched the same shows, but I don't wanna gatekeep. And I need some input too. But I re-watched that to see if it had ties. And I didn't see any AT FIRST. But saying it out loud made me realise.
In that episode Tiff and Mitch are trynna hunt dinosaurs to make money from them. And that's basically one of the main plots in chaos theory. Mysterious people are buying dinosaurs for money and to do their bidding. Now I don't think Tiff and Mitch are capable of that, but you never know. Maybe they worked for a group of people who evolved over years, and became way more serious with their dinosaur illegal doings.
Also Mitch and Tiff are dead. I believe they're dead. But I wouldn't fully rule it out that they are alive. Because technically we never saw bodies, they where never mentioned again, and I don't remember seeing blood in the scene where they went on the boat. And the size of the dinos, if Tiff for eaten by them they would have been a mess of blood. Idk. But maybe it's not that deep. But why else would that specific episode be called Chaos theory, and not any other??? It's gonna love in my brain forever and a half sandwich.
#jwct#chaos theory theory#jurassic world chaos theory#jwct theory#jwcc theory#jwcc#jurassic world camp cretaceous#tiff jwcc#mitch jwcc#ben pincus#darius bowman#yasmina fadoula#sammy gutierrez#brooklynn jwcc#also darius still has guilt and isolation 'do it myself' issues in that ep#poor boy don't catch a break#why do I keep forgetting to tag kenji it's funny because he is literally my favorite character#kenji kon#his daddy issues and feeling incompetent capture me#becaue same kenji same 😔#also benrius moments yeeeehhhh#benrius#guys please be crazy with me on this PLEASE#Im sick and should be sleeping but nahhhhhhhhh#they were dinostar moments too ig#can be taken platonically or romanrically tbh#dinostar#love that for them
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my pain doesn't make me a bad person
but it does kinda make me an asshole sometimes
#and that is why I need to occasionally self isolate :)#or I tell my loved ones 'my pain is really bad right now and it has put me on edge. I'm sorry if my words come out harsh. I am not mad'#and then I tell them that I can go be by myself until my pain is better if my tone/the sharpness of my words are making them feel bad#communication is key#chronic pain
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A redraw from something I made in June :)
I make a lot of Narrator art of my own guys but this is what I feel like he would look like. Original drawing from June in the upper left corner
#tsp#tsp narrator#the stanley parable#stanley parable ultra deluxe#art#narrator tsp#tsp fanart#fanart#tspud#LilyDoesDrawArt#I feel like maybe his tie used to be something simple#maybe a standard muted red or a black one#and then in UD he got a little silly#i also stole his signature#i didnt even write that myself im far too lazy#i just isolated the pixels from the actual one
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in my opinion, qphil isolating and exiling himself is only going to make things worse or delay the inevitable: as shown yesterday the enderking wants qphil to isolate, to not tell anyone, and luckily for our evil demigod that is exactly how qphil operates. he holds secrets in hopes of not hurting others, not getting them involved. and we just saw what happens when he has a support network helping him, he broke free from enderking’s grasp even for a moment. but that bit is not the only reason why his isolation is playing straight into enderking’s hands: it’s his insecurities as well. ”i’m a shit dad” ”i need to prove myself worthy of protecting” ”i need to provide better for the family” ”i need to be stronger” - all insecurities that are qphil’s downfall. enderking has already played into his need to provide for the kids as well as the want to be stronger (the buffs in the dungeon), what’s stopping him from digging his claws further to qphil’s core, his insecurities and weaknesses now that he has no one to break him out of his self-deprecating loop? when all he has are his thoughts, the caws of a crow and the voice of him? if no one finds him in exile, i think he will lose himself again, betrayed by his own mind
#historically isolating yourself has always worked and been a great idea /j#literally the only way i can see him making it out of this is if a deity finds him#qsmp#qsmp philza#qsmp phil#philza#shey rambles#literally every piece if mental health advice i’ve ever heard and read started screaming in my head the moment he decided to leave#of*#like you’re doing the exact thing that you’re told NOT TO DO IN ANY CIRCUMSTANCE#my god#when he said in a zombie apocalypse qphil would hide being bitten and just leave quietly to die he was not kidding#also melting point of wax… ’throw caution and myself into the wind’#you sure are!!!!#’i hear the voice of reason screaming after me’ YOU SURE AS HELL DO#THAT���S ME. I’M THE ONE SCREAMING AT YOU#FUCKKKKKK
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