#i haven't really seen anyone talking about this and it was bothering me
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heycrymeariver · 5 months ago
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five and many more: a timeline summary
(For legal reasons, all of this is alleged.)
Ref. links: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6
1984, is the first time Neil Gaiman released a book. 
In 1985, he got married and started his career as a comic book writer and in 1986, he assaulted Julia Hobsbawm.
This took place in Chalk Farm, London, where he forcibly kissed her and shoved her down on the sofa at her own studio flat before she escaped. According to The Crown Prosecution Service, “sexual assault is where one person intentionally touches another person sexually without their consent. The touching can be done with any part of the body or with an object.” In her own words, she described it as “an aggressive, unwanted pass” and that she still remembers it even now. 
Through 1987 and 2002 he progressed his career and published the famous book Coraline. A new year happens and he is in his early-forties and is thriving off of the success of his several money-making works, at a book signing event in Sarasota, Florida. There he hits it off with a young 18 year old (K) and they start dating. Two years later, in 2005, with two more awards under his belt, he forcibly penetrated that young twenty year old who told him not to because of a painful infection.
After another two years, he and his first wife divorced.
It's 2012, five years later and one year into a new marriage and at another book signing, Neil, age 52, immediately assaulted Claire (pseudonym) with a non-consensual kiss. Throughout keeping contact Neil had escalated this with video and phone calls that had a heavy sexual connotation where he appeared to either be naked or tried to instigate something. All of this accumulated into sexually assaulting her on a tour bus. Neil’s contact with her lasted until 2014 where he had promptly accused her in a text message that she had used him for sex.
Within the same year, Neil had enough money to buy a property, and met Caroline Wallner, 55, and her at-the time current husband. With a deal to do odd jobs for Neil and his wife to live there until she could own a five-acre plot, it wasn’t long before things turned sour. A divorce in 2017 sent everything spiraling, with her former husband fired, she in a once financially stable position, was now completely dependent on Neil Gaiman who used that to his advantage. Using her lack of financial stability to get himself sexual favors, he coerced her into a sexual-only, notably uninformed BDSM-entering territory while she was emotionally vulnerable, not accepting denials. This lasted until the summer of 2021, and in December of that year she and him went to court, what awaited her was $275k of compensation and a non-disclosure agreement (nda).
It wouldn’t take long for another woman to experience Neil Gaiman’s repeated offenses as well because in February of 2022, Scarlett (a pseudonym), age 23, a newly hired nanny, was sexually assaulted in the bathtub at his house. Neil, age 61, climbed into the bathtub with her and coerced her into having sexual relations. He too, in his coercion of her, made her financially dependent on him and brought BDSM elements to an inexperienced young woman who could not say no.
Since July 3rd of this year, 2024, five women have come out with sexual assault allegations aimed at Neil Gaiman. They all have several things in common with each other: either being young and naive, a fan of his, or put in a vulnerable spot financially or emotionally. Throughout the years and according to the stories, Neil progressively gets more bold and aggressive in his attempts for sexual gain. There are many more stories out there and whispers on the internet of how predatory Neil Gaiman has been in the industry. However, focusing on the five women who came out to speak and pushing their voice is an important part of the discussion.
Staying silent will only protect his peace.
(If you want to help keep this topic alive, please check out this post by @taraljc to see what steps you can take.)
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thelilylav · 8 months ago
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Hmmm... very interesting to me that Taylor Swift is trending rn and yet for some reason no one in that tag is complaining that her trending is taking away from what's going on in Palestine and what's happening in Rafah. And yet for some reason, people couldn't seem to shut up in the Kendrick Lamar tag when he was trending about how the whole beef was just two celebrities beef (it's much deeper than that) and were making up theories abt how the whole thing was taking attention away from Palestine and everyone talking about it should feel ashamed of themselves (every single account I saw in that tag was posting about Palestine too).
And the thing that's really getting me is that Taylor is trending bc of a change to the Eras tour. An objectively unimportant change to make, especially when compared to what's going on in Rafah. But that's not what gets hate, no, it's the predator getting called out in an industry known for exploitation by one of the biggest artists in said industry. The racism isn't even implicit atp...
Edit: ok so just to clarify no this wasn't meant to insinuate that Taylor trending was some setup of Israel (that's just... like objectively wrong lmao), it was to point out that when it comes to a black artist in hip hop (a predominantly non-white genre) people wouldn't let fans of said genre just enjoy the music and shenanigans happening in that genre and that's it's hypocritical to act like people can't care abt two things at once, but they can enjoy their white "feminist icon" pop star (a much whiter genre) without anyone bringing hate into that tag. like i put in the tags, the anti taylor tag is for filtering bc i honestly don't see this post as particularly negative for taylor swift, it's a critique of the fans. and i'm calling out swifties particularly bc the ones who were saying that the beef was manufactured to take eyes off of rafah were swifties, and the ones being racist in the kendrick tag were swifties. i'm not exaggerating like almost every hate post i saw mentioning the beef being manufactured was a swiftie account. it is weird to act like people caring about very serious allegations happening in a genre of music isn't reason enough to make a big deal of the situation and go INTO THE TAG and complain, but it is especially hypocritical and frankly quite infuriating to see the same people who complained about a big deal of a situation being a "distraction" from gaza and then blog abt taylor swift . it's fine if u want to blog abt music u like, honestly idc abt that, if that's all u do then this legit isn't targeted at u, this is targeted at the swifties who came into the kendrick tag to complain and then went back to talking abt swift two seconds later like they weren't doing the same thing they were complaining abt two minutes before. (sry for the long explanation, but i just don't want ppl taking my words out of context and i rlly tried to word this all clearly, but idk man sometimes u think u word something well and then nobody undrestands wtf u were on abt so i wanted to make sure it was clear) also, if you're a zionist or israel supporter, i will be blocking u if u interact with this post. ok ty bye bye
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babacontainsmultitudes · 9 months ago
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[just venting a bit into the void you understand you understand 😌] Lately I've been feeling very caught between "I have a lot of thoughts on Sparrow and Normal and all that with the ending and teen talk and feel like I need to get them out and voice them for my own piece of mind and resolution" and "I am lacking the strength and energy to actually sit down and write it all out and kind of really just want to fully move on to other things (AUs, fics, anything else)" but my brain can't seem to commit to either and that's quite frustrating cause it's just left me very restless. *Sigh*. Idk! Just needed to complain about that a bit ig, it's silly but this is what has been ailing me as of late.
#Then there's also a part of me that's like “does anyone even care at this point? haven't I already talked about them too much?”#but I have seen many a take that irk me...#and perhaps at the center of it all nagging at me is that persistent conflation of love and pride#Less about that in Normal's mind so much as in Will's and the fandom's 🤔#Also that reoccurring issue of the fandom going ''Normal thinks this therefore it is The Truth'' though I believe I've discussed this befor#And... Hooks Will could have grabbed onto but didn't... Quite a few of those...#And the double standard/negativity bias in fandom of ignoring that Sparrow says both that he loves and likes Normal while doodlerized#But not treating those with the same legitimacy we do the pride thing. And ignoring Sparrow's demonstrations of love and change...#And what the love wolf scene actually implies about Sparrow (as I see it) with his own explanation of the pride thing in mind#But also!!! Also on Norm's epilogue and how despite everything taken at face value (i.e. no teen talk influence) I don't actually hate it#and I think it's plenty salvageable#And gah also that like *regardless* of how things turn out with Normal and his dad-#Well I haven't listened to much of the teen talk just the directly Sparrow-relevant clips#so I don't know quite how cynical Will is or isn't about Normal's future#But like. UGH. What I'm trying to say is even if things didn't find resolution vis-a-vis his dad#(which tbh I could go either way on- it's the meta misinterpretations of Sparrow that Bother me not so much Normal's)#(Well that's complicated. Again it comes back to the love vs. pride thing gosh this is so vague of me lol)#With all the positive influences in his life (and just the fact that life is long? and therapy is a thing?) I just don't see Normal-#being Miserable for the rest of his life. Like. I mean I won't elaborate here really but damn it no he can absolutely turn out alright stil#blugh#BUT YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN THAT'S A LOT OF STUFF AND THAT'S ONLY VAGUE RAMBLINGS ABOUT *SOME* OF IT#Like I'm proud of a lot of my essay posts (which I'm hoping to eventually compile in a masterpost eventually actually) but they take a whil#And if my heart wants to do other things... Ah idk...#ANYWAYS a vent to vent a vent to vent
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lynnie-ee · 2 months ago
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Day 10; Fight.
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╰┈➤"Your boyfriend's goals were very clear; Make you happy, spend time with you and defend you from anyone who dared to insult you in any possible way."
╰►Gender neutral reader, one-shot, 1.9k words. Kinda based on that one tweet that was like "My girl can wear whatever she want cause I can fight."
╰► Characters: Deuce, Jade, Floyd, Epel.
╰►Note: The prompts are based on words I found interesting and then I put them on a roulette to decide when I would write about them, lol. English is not my first language, so please let me know if there are any grammatical mistakes <3. Not proof read, I haven't written in a long time, so I apologise if anything is out of character.
╰►Masterlist / Inktober Masterlist.
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﹙❥﹚Deuce Spade ❜ ˖ ࣪⊹ ִֶָ
He tries his best, most of the time.
Every time he gets jealous or mad at someone else, he has to remind himself that he’s no longer a delinquent. 'Top students don’t engage in fights', he’d say to himself, even though he was well aware he had been in a few arguments with other students ever since he joined Night Raven College, each time promising himself it wouldn’t happen again.
Until it came to something related to you.
It was Halloween, it was supposed to be fun. You wanted to try a different costume this time, and decided to wear a more eccentric outfit, trying to match the extravagance of the other dorms.
You looked really cute, and Deuce was quick to compliment you, taking your hand with an excited demeanour, walking with you towards the Heartslabyul stand to show the rest of your friends your outfit.
He was really happy, as he walked along you, entertained as he listened to you talking about how you went into town and tried in many costumes before choosing that one, when he was able to hear a comment made by another Hearstlabyul student as they walked by.
"Well, they got no magic and no style, huh? Where did they even get that costume, at the kid's section?"
"Repeat what you just said." Deuce was quick to stop his walk, turning towards the student with a frown on his face.
"I said they look terrible." He answered with a defiant demeanour.
"They look perfect, are you out of your mind?" He got closer to the student with a menacing aura, ready to punch him if it was necessary.
"Not really, I've seen better-dressed scarecrows, why are you even letting them go outside like that?"
That was it.
Before you could even stop him, Deuce threw a punch directly at the guy's face, who wasn't even brave enough to defend himself, instead he just stood there holding his now bleeding nose, seemingly out of words now.
"And just so you know, they can dress however they want! And they got their costume at the adult section, don't say such stupid things!" He screamed as you dragged him out of the place, trying to avoid the small crowd that was starting to form due to the sudden commotion.
"Riddle's gonna kill you if he knows about this, you know?" You commented as you both walked to Ramshackle now, deciding to wait a bit before going to Heartslabyul.
"And It'll be worth it! He had no reason to say that kind of thing about you."
"I don't care, really."
"But I do! No one will insult you in front of me without getting what they deserve."
You giggled softly at his attitude, stopping briefly to plant a kiss on his cheek.
"Well, thank you, my Prince Charming." You watched as he blushed, timidly holding your hand.
"Whe-whenever you need it, my love!"
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﹙𖧵ֹֺֽ໋໋݊﹚Jade Leech ❜ ˖ ࣪⊹ ִֶָ
He can definitely fight, but it won't be his first option, unless the other person is the one who starts it, which never happens, because, well, he's Jade Leech.
He prefers to use more efficient techniques to make sure people never bother you again, which is why is widely known around school that no one should mess with Ramshackle's Prefect.
So imagine his surprise when, in the middle of one of his shifts, as you were sitting on one of the stools of the bar while waiting for him to be done, he heard a most unfortunate comment.
"Doesn't Azul always bother everyone about how this is a very distinguished place? I wonder who let them in while looking like that, they look like they came here straight out of bed."
As Jade was walking to a different table, he heard two students from Scarabia, making him promptly direct his gaze towards you, sitting by the bar with your headphones, without being aware of the words directed at you. It was Saturday, and you had stayed at his dorm last night, so you had decided to wear something comfy as you waited for your boyfriend. The outfit of the day was one of Jade's hoodies, which had a small embroidery of a mushroom on the front, along with a loose pair of jeans, as you supposed nobody would look at you in the secluded corner you chose to be.
You looked absolutely adorable in his eyes, and he wouldn't stand for malicious comments about you.
"Is everything alright? Are you enjoying your meal?" He asked politely towards the group of Scarabia students, who froze up immediately when Jade appeared out of nowhere, his smile more frightening than usual.
"Ye-yeah, everything is fine."
"I'm glad to hear that, but..." His smile widened as he got closer to the student who made the comment earlier, whispering so only he could hear. "I wonder if you'd be still fine if Professor Crewel knew about how you cheated on his last exam?" An innocent tone could be heard in his voice.
"How-how did you-?"
"This is a very distinguished place, as you know. It'd be inappropriate to allow patrons with such immoral attitudes to be seen in here."
"Let me talk to Azul, you can't-"
"Uh? What was that? I can't do it, you say?" He raised an eyebrow, a curious expression on his face, as he expected an answer from the nervous student, who knew better than to make Jade Leech angry.
"We-were finished either way, right? Thanks for the service, we'll be going!" The other student interrupted, quickly getting up to get ready to leave.
"Ah, I hope you enjoyed your time here." The vicehousewarden bowed politely. "But I hope you're aware that, if you make such inconvenient comments about my partner, I won't let you go as easily." He added with a close-eyed smile that didn't match his words in the slightest, as the students went away as fast as they could.
"Uhm, Jade? Your shift is about to finish, isn't it?" You asked taking your headphones out of your head to speak to your boyfriend more properly, as he placed one of your favourite drinks in front of you, his smile remaining on his face, but this time being softer.
"Yes, my love, just wait a bit more."
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﹙𖧵ֹֺֽ໋໋݊﹚Floyd Leech ❜ ˖ ࣪⊹ ִֶָ
Some days he fights, someday he doesn't care at all, some days he'll let you defend yourself if you want.
Either way, same as Jade, you weren't bothered often. No one would risk enraging the unpredictable Leech twin, and at first, when you started dating, some people wouldn't even look at you at risk of being misunderstood by the Octavinelle second-year.
It was less extreme now, as you've dated him for a while, but there were still some people who preferred to be more cautious around you.
But of course, there'll be always stupid people who'd make rude comments even when Floyd was near.
"Wish me luck, shrimpy!" Your boyfriend looked at you expectant, an excited smile on his face.
"Good luck, Floyd, score some points, okay?" You kissed his cheek softly, giggling when he accommodated the hoodie you were wearing, before going back to the basketball court.
You were in the stands, waiting for the start of a match between Night Raven College and another school which you didn't much about, you just knew that you were supposed to be there to support your boyfriend, and your friends too.
Floyd played better when you were around, and he liked to find you right away in the middle of the crowd, which is why he gave you his hoodie before the match. A hoodie that he likes to wear loose, and considering his height, you wondered if it'd fit you right when he offered it. You were wrong, and now you were sitting while completely drowning in the piece of clothing, making you look a bit out of place. But you didn't care, as long as he was happy.
The match started and everything went smoothly, as Floyd seemed to be on top of his game, scoring points left and right as he watched you cheer on him.
Until a student from the other school spotted you in the middle of the crowd, laughing to himself and then commenting on it with one of his classmates.
"Did you see that one student over there? I wonder if all the students here dress like such a mess, that hoodie is at least four sizes bigger than them."
"Perhaps they didn't even look themselves in the mirror before coming here, how embarrassing."
Floyd frowned as he heard such a comment about you, quickly deciding his strategy. He wouldn't allow words like that to be directed at his little Shrimpy.
"Hey, Floyd, pass it to me- what are you doing?!"
BAM.
The whole gymnasium fell into silence as Floyd threw the ball in the air. The thing was, that instead of being aimed to score a point, it landed on a different place...On the head of the student from the other school.
You could only watch in surprise, as Floyd turned around to show you a thumbs-up, as if he had solved a problem you had no idea about.
"Floyd! What was that?!"
It was a very effective strategy, at least.
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﹙𑁍﹚Epel Felmier ❜ ˖ ࣪⊹ ִֶָ
He'll fight at any opportunity that he gets.
After all, that's what a good boyfriend does, right? Defending you from stupid people it's his number one priority, and he wants to show you that you can depend on him.
It reaches a point in which Vil has to intervene, as it has been a regular thing lately, something the housewarden can't allow. 'Brutes don't belong in Pomefiore', is what he tells Epel one day as he scolds him, reminding him there are more ethical ways to solve things. Now he's on observation; one more fight and he'll be punished by cleaning all the windows of the dorm.
Ever since, he has been doing good, and you help him calm down when some stupid student from another dorm says something mean, telling him they don't know anything about the two of you.
But one day, as you both hang out in the Pomefiore lounge, he hears some second-years speak to each other across the room, as if you two weren't literally a few meters away from them.
"Did you see that atrocious sweater? No matter how you look a it, it doesn't match their jeans at all. Vil should stop letting people with such bad taste enter Pomefiore, don't you think?"
"What did ya say about (Y/n)?!" Epel startled you as he suddenly got up from the sofa you both were, quickly walking towards the other Pomefiore students, who observed him with a superior demeanour.
"We were talking about how badly your partner dresses. You're a Pomefiore student, Epel, you should know better than to let them walk outside with such ugly clothing."
"I gifted them that sweater! Take back your words, you idiot!"
"Even worse, you're absolutely tarnishing Pomefiore's reputation by-"
"And the next I'm gonna tarnish is gonna be your face if ya don't apologise to them, so hurry up, would ya?" Epel interrupted, promptly getting ready for fighting.
"Epel, let's just go to my dorm, okay? If you get into another fight you'll get punished." You tried to talk some common sense into him, considering that Vil would immediately know if there was an argument in his dorm.
"They're insulting you, ain't no way I'll letting 'em get away from that."
"But Vil-"
"I don't give a damn 'bout Vil-"
"What's the meaning of this scandal?!"
Well...You'll help him clean those windows, would you?
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dreameralive · 6 months ago
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i think one of the most noteworthy things about Blaise that i haven't really seen anyone discuss is his tendency to liken others to children, his weaponization of it, its relation to him being a child abuser, and its relation to his defeat.
one of his first lines of dialogue, before he even introduces himself, is him humiliating Franziska by calling her 'little von Karma', and then bringing up something retroactively embarrassing she did as a little girl.
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he frames this as genuine nostalgia, but to me, it's pretty clear this was a purposeful, and almost sadistic, powerplay.
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there's also these lines. these aren't too strange, out of context - "let's all play nice" is a relatively common phrase, and in the second screenshot where he's discussing Kay and Edgeworth's friendship, they are literally youths (well, compared to him). but in context, it's clear that this is part of him attempting to assert his dominance over everyone else.
he wants to let everyone know that he is the adult here, and all they are is children - and thereby, they are completely powerless to his end-all authority, so they shouldn't even bother attempting to resist. this is further emphasized during his logic chess segment.
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he calls Edgeworth 'my boy', he reminds him that he is his 'senior in life', he tells him he's being naïve. he threatens to never give back his prosecutors badge if he doesn't stop trying to question his authority. he asks him, mockingly, if he's scared. then, while grinning, he tells him that there is nothing he can do, and he should give up already.
he once again, more blatantly this time, is attempting to force someone else into accepting that they are the weaker party and that he could do anything he pleased to them, and once again, he is weaponizing the societal power imbalance between a child and an adult to do so.
i could go on and on for a while with more examples of this, but then that would make this post really long and rambly. so, instead, i'm going to discuss what his behavior ultimately results in.
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this is probably one of the most disturbing interactions in Ace Attorney.
he does this purely so Sebastian will feel humiliated and ashamed in front of his colleagues, people he respects and who in turn are supposed to respect him. he does this to remind Sebastian that he is his father, and Sebastian is his child. to Blaise, that means he has complete control over him. and until this point? he actually does.
he has controlled every aspect of Sebastian's life to be exactly how he wants it. his path in life, his school, his tests - even Sebastian's constant usage of his surname serves as a reminder that Sebastian's only purpose to his father is to be an extension of him, a tool to feed into his ego. an object. something he owns.
note how, in their sprites, Sebastian is typically tilting his head slightly downwards, and in his crying sprites, he's leaning down. meanwhile Blaise stands high, and in his grinning sprites, his head is tilted up, as to literally look down on the person he's talking to.
but in the end, right before Blaise is convicted, right as Blaise tells him he should just remain his idiot son, Sebastian is looking up as he tells him goodbye. a way of saying that he's not beneath him, and he won't let him act like it anymore.
Blaise is immediately infuriated by this, and says all you've ever been able to do is depend on me. he screams Sebastian's name in anger - but it's cut off.
in fact, there is no more dialogue from Blaise after this. because he has no more authority, no more ability to scare Sebastian or anyone else into submission. in the end, Sebastian has finally taken back his autonomy that Blaise has robbed him of. so has Kay. so has Simon. all of them are children he has mistreated, threatened, and jerked around for his own selfish gain, but ultimately, they all still have more power over their own lives than he ever will again.
there's a lot more i could say on this, but these are all my thoughts i could organize. thanks for reading.
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pacifierbby · 2 months ago
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★ . . . . . 𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑𝐒 𝐓𝐎 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒
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Summary , Lando is drunk, out of it and alone. Reader decides to help him out until he can find Max. They spend a lot of time together while she tries to help Lando out and eventually helps him find Max and they part ways The next day they meet at a coffee shop and Max remembers her and re-introduces them
| Lando Masterlist | Main Masterlist | Request |
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The club was alive with music people dancing on the dance floor some on top of the tables you clearly didn't understand how they wasn't thrown out yet.
Your friends decided it was time to go out and what they say is "to party" since a new club has just opened in your town. Still, you were just more focused on spending your Saturday night tooked under some blankets and watching back-to-back episodes of Murder documentaries but your friends literally pulled you against that plan and told you to "go out more!" and here you are now with too many rowdy people and you knew that you were going to have to babysit these fools and make sure that they all got home safely so you weren't really planning to drink that much.
The night was slowly dragging more people walking in making it more crowded than it was before you were sure that they had capacity in these places and if they didn't then it was a little stupid since people more easily get lost from their friends and that what happened to you your friends left you to go dance and you haven't seen them since.
Walking towards the bar sitting down on the stool waiting for someone to take your order a young boy sitting next to you a beer in front of him looking in every direction seems to be trying to find his friend "Are you looking for someone?" you softly spoke the young boy turning towards you "yeah my friend left me to go to the toilet haven't seen him since" he slurred the words mixing a little but you understood him a little "what does he look like?" looking at the direction of the man's toilets to see if anyone was looking for someone but unfortunately no one was there looking back at the boy who you didn't get the name off just yet seeing that he was struggling with his phone "stupid thing" he softly spoke making you laugh a little "do you want me to help you?" he nodded instantly passing you his phone putting his past code in first making you a little surprised that he remembers it while drunk
Looking through all his photos the same man jumping out at you every time turning the phone around
"is this him?" you asked his attention elsewhere not even bothering to acknowledge you making you sigh "Excuse me" tapping his back a little
"uh sorry what" he began to tremble his eyes leaving the woman instantly his eyes looking at his phone he just nodded not really bothered about his friend anymore but the girl that on the other side of the club
"um well here's your phone hopefully he finds you soon" getting up from the bar stool and slowly grabbing your bag from the bar not really wanting to help the guy anymore which you still didn't get the name from since his attention is elsewhere.
"where are you going?" he began his attention fully on you now
"um, your attention was on her so I thought" pointing your finger to the exit of the conversation that you are in at the moment making you a little uncomfortable since you don't really know what he's talking about. but you can say that he is really cute you can definitely fight for that
"don't be stupid please sit back down she's a slut anyway" slurring his words a little but you kind of knew what he was saying but the slut part making your eyes nearly pop out of your head.
The conversations flowed instantly after that little thing you knew more about him he was an F1 driver and called Lando but you knew the F1 thing was probably to try and to impress you but you didn't want to hurt the poor guy. the drinks were coming more quickly than you hoped Lando became more drunk and one thing you hated was babysitting drunk people but for this cute lad, you would do anything. but one thing you did wish was for his friend to randomly appear.
"you alright mate" a voice came from behind you both the same accent that Lando has turned around to see the same guy that in half of his photo gallery "You must be Max" you began putting your hand out so he can shake it
"I am indeed, just want to say thank you for looking after this drunk lord was slightly hoping he wasn't dancing on top of the tables somewhere when I came back".
making you laugh, however, you really didn't have the guts to even ask where he wandered off to since he was a grown arse adult "well enjoy the rest of the night and looking after this one" you pointed next to you
"Think we going to head home actually thinks he drunk enough of his own body weight for one night" Lando just sulked knowing that the both of you was talking about it.
"thank you for looking after me beautiful" leaning in to kiss you on the cheek making you blush a little watching lando and Max walk out of the bar you slowly following from behind.
The next day came quicker than you hopped and the whopping headache followed making you instantly groan and promising yourself to not go out again which you swear this time you're actually sticking to it. However, the boy from the club instantly fogs your brain making you kind of regret that you didn't even ask for his number but you did remember that he told you he was an f1 driver quickly searching on Google F1 Lando a link and photos slowly popping on your screen making your mouth drop a little he wasn't actually trying to impress you you thought he was actually being genuinely serious.
You knew your day couldn't be frowning about the guy that you met and didn't get the number from so you thought on going to your local coffee shop and getting your favourite drink and food.
The coffee shop door makes a ringing noise when you open it Helen is behind the counter like every other day "You okay my dear?" she asked you loved Helen she was like a mother to you always finding some time out of her busy schedule to talk to you "morning and yeah just a small hangover" you laughed a little making her roll her eyes "wish I was your age again. anyway the usual? " making you nod.
The door rang again behind you to guys walking in with sunglasses on hiding their eyes from whatever they did last night even though you couldn't fully recognise them the face features do look awfully similar.
"Y/N is that you" the man spoke taking his glasses off that's how you knew them you thought its the same people from last night
"uh that's me" you spoke Max touching Lando's shoulder "This is the lady that looked after you last night" Lando taking his glasses away from his face
"thank you hopefully I wasn't that hard to look after" making you laugh a little the same feeling from last night instantly coming back
"honestly no trouble Lando you defiantly kept me entertained"
"well um I uh um" he spoke softly the nerves getting the better off him a little "Can I get your number just in case I need another babysitter" making you laugh a little the nervous from lando instantly forgotten about but making your heart swell passing him your phone both off you exchanging numbers
"well I'll defiantly see you around" making you blush a little you nodded watching them leave the café the same way that they did last night
"I sense some romanceeeeee" Helen spoke behind you grabbing your order from the counter "maybe you can be the bridesmaid" you both laughed.
You and Lando met once again the energy from you both pulling you both in making it a romance story the one you always wanted.
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klausysworld · 3 months ago
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Hey so i was wondering if maybe you could possibly write me a smutty story with Klaus like about how even though he turned me made me a hybrid or vampire now he still wants to celebrate my birthday? My birthday is on the 29th of August so its literally 4 days away id love that
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Happy Birthday, Sweetheart.
Turning wasn't something I had intended to do or wanted really, it was out of necessity that Klaus had given me his blood and it was an accident that I died with it in my system.
Klaus had convinced me to complete the transition, promising to be there with me and for me throughout the highs and lows of vampirism.
In all fairness, he had been with me but sometimes the lows were really low. Especially when it came round to my supposed to be birthday. However I was never going to get older again, there was no point in blowing out some silly candles and making a wish that would never come true. I couldn't celebrate that I was a year closer to any major life event or be able to talk about stupid things like a slight pay rise as I get older.
So when I woke up, and checked to see the dreaded date, I didn't bother getting out of bed. Well not until I felt an arm round my waist, pulling me back against a firm body. My eyes cracked open when his deep voice rumbled from behind my ear.
"Happy birthday, sweetheart." He muttered, a kiss pressed to the back of my ear and then my cheek before I was rolled over to face him. My face was level with his as he brushed the tip of his nose over mine and I groaned.
"Can we just not?" I mumbled, my voice croaky from sleep but I knew he got it as his brows pulled together and his eyes crinkled ever so slightly at the edges.
"No, we definitely will." He argued, his face returning to relaxed again as he pecked my lips. "Believe it or not but we all still celebrate our birthdays, Rebekah insists upon it."
"Were calendars even a thing back then?" I ask, still just about coherent and he hummed.
"No...but we had our ways to know...or perhaps we simply chose our birthdays a few years down the line. Nevertheless we celebrate and I refuse to let you go without." He whispered, kissing my temple and offering a smile.
"I've been here ages and haven't seen any of your birthdays, you're lying." I murmured, eyes narrowed.
"Well..." He sighed, a click to his tongue. "We celebrate as often as we can, the past couple months or so have been very complicated to say the least."
"Fine but I better see you with a birthday hat and badge on- when was your birthday?" I question and he sighed.
"March time. Doesn't matter, it isn't about me. This is about you. Now come, the festivities have only just began." He teased before both arms were hoisting me up and over his shoulder like a rag doll making me whine.
"Klaus!" I squirmed but only for a second, I wasn't awake enough to fight him. His hand patted my ass playfully as he carried me out of our room, making my body tense but he shushed me.
"I won't let anyone see this pretty little behind of yours." He chuckled, bringing me down the stairs and spinning me round and placing me on the breakfast stool. My head spun a little, attempting to adjust as a warm plate was placed in front of me by a softly smiling Elijah.
"Congratulations on your birthday, Y/N." He uttered, keeping his voice quiet which I appreciated before Rebekah's voice bellowed out.
"For christs sake Elijah! Just say normal things like 'happy birthday'!" She tutted, rolling her eyes and dropping down beside me. "Happy birthday, darling. It'll be spectacularly, I guarantee." She grinned and I could feel the dread forming as I pushed a smile to my face and bit the end of some bacon to keep my mouth preoccupied so I wouldn't have to find any words to keep the magic of my fantastic birthday alive.
Klaus's hand ruffled my hair, his chuckle a distant sound in the air as he left the room. My head turned to find him but Rebekah was nudging my side.
"Don't look, he's going to get your presents. Keep eating, and try to contain your excitement." She practically bounced beside me, smile brighter than ever as she pulled out a party horn and blew it in my face.
Just seconds later an elastic band snapped under my chin, a card hat on top my head and Hayley kissing my cheek before catching my ear. "Just go with it, it'll get better." She whispered and I listened.
By the time I had finished my breakfast, Klaus was behind me.
I had just slipped off the stool, Elijah had already taken my plate and when I turned around there was an array of differently shaped and sized presents wrapped and displayed across the room. Klaus standing infront of them, slowly coming towards me with a hand outstretched.
I took it after a second and let him lead me over, arms going round me from behind as he lifted the first gift to my hands. "Please...just enjoy yourself." He whispered, nose in my neck.
Presents took a while. By the end I couldn't be upset. Klaus knew me like an open book and had hit every mark possible. Bringing me to tears several times with extra special gifts.
Which was why my face was buried in his chest, eyes closed and fingers curled around his henley as he kissed the top of my head.
I found myself back upstairs soon after, stripped bare and soaking peacefully in the bathtub whilst Rebekah and Hayley yelled through the next room, going on about the party they had planned.
The dress Rebekah had designed fit like a glove and I couldn't deny how beautiful I felt in it, especially once the girls had done my hair and makeup.
"Everything's perfect." Bekah uttered, hands fixing the last few strands and checking the hairspray had set.
"Klaus is gonna go crazy." Hayley whistled and my eyes rolled though a smile pulled at my face.
They were right too, he was all over me as soon as I got to the bottom of the staircase. Lips kissing mine and hands on my hips, gripping them like he usually does in the depths of our room.
"Happy birthday, my love." He whispered and I hummed before adjusting his bowtie.
"You are adorable when you dress up." I teased and he smirked.
"You may never cease to surprise me with your...unique compliments for me." He chuckled and I hummed, kissing him again.
"Lets go dance." I whispered and he shook his head with a grin.
"Birthday toasts, my love." He told me and I groaned softly as I pulled him over to where everyone was spinning each other around happily. He relented of course and gave into a few dances before pulling me onto the stair case and having me held to his side whilst he toasted my birthday before his siblings and Hayley followed. All expressing their appreciation and love for me.
It was quite lovely actually. I was glad to have celebrated my birthday when I hugged each of them before we all got back on the floor.
So many people had brought me gifts, said such kind words and I had to wonder if they were compelled but I didn't even care by the end of the day when Klaus had me held against the wall. Mouth on my neck, sucking his beautiful marks into my skin and hands bunching up my dress.
I could still hear the music and chatter of guests just a wall over as his fingers stroked their way up my thighs. I could feel the warmth spreading through my body. I clung onto his suit jacket, tugging relentlessly with need as I tried to contain the moans that clawed up my throat.
A gasp escaped me as his teeth bit my skin, not his vampire teeth but his human ones. Not quite making me bleed but still breaking the skin.
I tried to pull him closer, my legs pulling at his waist letting me feel how hard he was against me.
"Oh god" I breathed, my eyes looking down quickly but all I could see was dress as he ground himself against me.
"You have no idea how badly I want to take you right now." He whispered and I moaned softly.
"God..yes, do it." I begged and he hummed.
"Not yet...you need your gift." He muttered before he was holding the backs of my thighs tightly. I glanced at him, confused before groaning softly as he got down to his knees and placed both my legs over his shoulders.
"Klaus..." I whispered as his head was completely covered by the skirt of my dress.
Despite not being able to see him, there was absolutely no doubt he was there as the heat of his treasured mouth kissed my wetness through my thong. God he was good, he was always so good.
If euphoria were a person, it would be Klaus.
He knew exactly what to do, how to touch, how to love me so good that I love myself too.
My hands pressed to the walls around and my head went back to rest. He was pure heat between my legs and he made my legs shake against my will.
"One day you're gonna really kill me." I whispered, my words a blur as I felt my back arch off of the wall behind. I could feel his lips move against my cunt as he mumbled something back. The wet vibrations of his mouth making my insides twist delightfully. "God- fuck!" I cried as he chuckled, only adding to the intensity.
A laugh escaped him whilst he pulled his face away though my dress still hid him from my view.
"You'll alert the whole party if you keep screaming sweetheart." He reminded and I nodded in acknowledgment. My mouth closed in an attempt to muffle my sounds as the warm touch of his fingers stroked my pussy tauntingly.
I felt blood pool my mouth when my fangs sunk into my own tongue in time with his fingers plunging inside me. He made my nails penetrate my palms; a shiver to run down my spine.
My mind drew a blank at the methodic pump of his fingers, each curl and stroke hitting so unbelievably perfect that I seemed to be falling apart before he'd truly even started.
His laugh was amused and teasing as my legs were dropped to his waist where both his hands grabbed my thighs.
"I'm very serious when I tell you that the entirety of next door just heard you my love." He grinned before lifting my as he got to his feet and carried me to our room.
I was dropped to the bed with a soft thud, his body covering me like a blanket would as he nuzzled beneath my ear. "You know...I sincerely considered wearing a ribbon for you, my love." He murmured making me giggle at the idea.
"Oh yeah? Where would you have worn it?" I teased, my hands lifting to cup his face; my thumbs brushing over his stubble. "What part of you would I have gotten to unwrap." I whispered and a soft rumble travelled through his body.
No words left him as I felt my dress be tugged, a quick rough tug which caused a loud tear to sound through the room. I didn't have to look to know the extent of his damage, the cool air spreading down my front told me enough. His hands pulled the loose material away, leaving me completely bare beneath him. Open to him in all ways.
"Must you always break things?" I whined, despite not truly being annoyed.
"Oh love. I don't break things, I ruin them." He uttered, his words sharp on his tongue as his calloused hand stroked the side of my face. "Now lay back, my love, and let me ruin you."
I knew it wasn't a question but a demand and a demand that shot straight to my core.
The silence rang as I laid back, head against the pillows.
I accepted my fate wholeheartedly, and under no circumstances would I even consider skipping out on my birthday next year if I knew this was coming.
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You have no idea how sorry I am for this being so god damn late. I know it’s not my best, I hope it’s still something that can make you smile even just a little bit @nerdygamer829
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kat651 · 4 months ago
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touch starved (Bucky x reader)
warnings: none, pure fluff.
word count: 1473
Everyone lives au
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Bucky had been dating you for almost a year now and he hasn't given you much physical contact except for the occasional holding of hands. Even his kisses, though sweet, were always short but passionate. You hadn't pushed it, figuring he just wasn't big on physical touch. Which was hard for you since touch was something you loved. You got your hugs and snuggles elsewhere though. Thor, and Steve didn't mind prolonged hugs. Thor was huge on touch, and always knew when you needed a hug. And Nat was your go to for cuddles. You'd cuddle Thor if both you and him were single but you weren't and it would be weird for you to do so, also it wouldn't be the most appropriate thing either. And Morgan! Morgan saw you as a big sister, she loved to watch movies with you while snuggling up in your lap. 
At first Tony would tell Morgan to leave you be, but you immediately told Tony that you didn't mind at all. Morgan was a little snuggle bug, which you needed. 
Bucky sat on the couch, watching tv, well he had it on but he didn't really care for the film he was just wondering how on earth to tell you that he was craving touch. He had been since he got his mind back, but why would anyone want to snuggle up to an x assassin/ murderer?
“Something bothering you Buck?” Steve asked, sitting down on the couch.
Bucky sighed, “i- i just… i don't know how to tell y/n that i…” bucky looked away. “Nevermind it's dumb.”
“Bucky what is it?” 
Bucky sighed. “I… I feel empty…”
“Empty?” Dr. Strange asked, sitting. “Empty how?”
Bucky sighed, he knew that Strange was the one person he couldn't argue with. “I…it's rather personal…”
Dr. Strange used his magic to make his lips zip closed. Bucky sighed but knew he'd have to speak eventually… “I don't know, I guess I just feel almost… cold inside… like a warmth is missing…" Bucky paused. “I don't know why i feel this way, y/n has never made me feel like she doesnt care i just…” 
Bucky paused as you walked in with Morgan on your shoulders. “Have you guys seen Tony?” you asked. 
“He’s in the lab with Bruce.” Steve said. 
“Ok. thanks Steve.” you said turning and walking back out.
“I want that…” bucky said, pointing to where you had been moments earlier. 
“You want to ride around on y/n’s shoulders? Buck no offense but I think you'd break her back, you're too big." Steve said.
Bucky growled. “No, I want her to.. To…” bucky mumbled the rest of his sentence under his breath. 
“What?”
Bucky sighed. “I want her touch… you know, her to curl up against my side like Morgan does with y/n… i… i don't know why, i don't-”
“It sounds like your touch starved…” Strange said. “When's the last time you've hugged someone for longer than ten seconds? 
“1945.” Bucky said without even having to think. “I haven't danced since then either…”
Strange frowned. “Yeah, if you want that empty and cold feeling to go away you're gonna need to let her hold you.” he said before standing and walking off. “Wong's calling. I have to take this…”
Bucky frowned. “What so I'm just supposed to go up to her and say ‘hold me’ like I'm some baby. No thanks…”
“What are we talking about?” nat asked, plopping down on the couch. 
“Buck's too scared to tell y/n he needs a hug.” Steve teased.
Bucky punched Steve, “I will kill you.”
Nat chuckled. “Then don't tell her, just randomly come up behind her and hug her. Don't tell anyone but that's what Bruce does every morning. If he doesn't randomly hug me I know he's angry about something…”
Bucky thought about this as Nat and Steve got a call for a mission. 
“Tonight’s movie night, you can snuggle up to her for over an hour!” Steve shouted as he ran out of the room behind nat. 
Bucky smiled and stood before heading to Bruce’s lab. He decided he was going to try the surprise hug from behind thing on you.
When he arrived in the lab you were braiding Morgan's hair as she sat in a chair. Bucky smiled, Pepper had asked you to watch her one time during the blip and now wherever you went Morgan was almost always following you. If she wasnt that was probably because she was with her ‘big brother’ peter. Bucky also knew that Morgan was a little shy around him. Which didn’t surprise him, Bucky was tall, quiet, and muscular and his arm was made completely of metal. 
Bucky waited for Morgan to go over to Tony before wrapping you in a surprise hug. 
You shook your head. “Thor, how many times do I have to tell you not to do that?’ you turned and a smile spread across your face. “Oh hey bucky…” you pressed a kiss on Bucky's cheek. “Hi…” you whispered, leaning back so you were even closer to him. “What did you do?”
“What?” 
“Bucky you only hug me after you've done something you regret. What did you do?”
Bucky turned you around so you were facing him. “I honestly just wanted a hug this time…ok?”
You let your head fall on Bucky's shoulder. “Ok…”
Morgan ran back over and paused, she wasn't sure what to do. She would never tell anyone but Bucky Barnes scared her. 
Bucky gave Morgan a smile before pressing another kiss on your temple. “Love you…” he whispered before walking off. 
.-.-.
When movie night rolled around, Bucky grabbed his sweater and threw it on before heading into the main room where everyone sat together for the movie. Bucky then realized that everyone had their ‘spot’ ; this was the first time that Bucky had decided to join the movie night; he normally just used this time to have the training room all to himself. Heck, even Fury was there. 
Bucky then realized there was only one empty spot, the one right next to you. He smiled and went to sit when Morgan ran up and jumped into the empty spot. Bucky frowned. So there wasn't an empty spot for him after all.
“Bucky, come on, sit!” He looked over and saw that there was another empty spot, next to Sharon. 
“Actually, Bucky is going to sit with his girlfriend,” Nat said, getting up from her spot on Morgan's other side and going over to the empty space next to sharon. 
Sharon scowled as nat sat down next to her. “Really?” 
“What? y/n is Bucky's girlfriend.” nat said, settling down and getting comfortable. Sharon left and didn't return. Bruce pointed to Sharon's empty spot and whispered something to Steve and Sam before walking over and sitting next to Nat. 
You scooted over so he could sit. Bucky sat and slipped an arm around you while Morgan curled up with a blanket. You were surprised by Bucky's sudden hunger for touch but you weren't complaining you wanted this. You nuzzled closer and Bucky pulled you into his lap before motioning for Morgan to get in your lap. 
Tony and Pepper walked in and raised a brow. “Morgan, why don't you sit with Peter tonight?” Tony offered. 
Morgan looked up at you and you nodded. “Go on…”
“Wait, I got an idea.” Peter walked over and sat in the now empty spot on the couch and Morgan sat on his lap. “Mj isn't here tonight…”
Morgan smiled, she was a very happy five year old girl. 
Tony shook his head and sat down, opening his arms so Pepper could snuggle into his embrace. 
Once the movie started, Bucky began to feel a warm feeling in his chest as you nuzzled closer to him. “I love you, bucky…” you whispered in his ear. Bucky smiled and put his other arm around you, this was exactly what he needed, your embrace and love to fill his tired and slightly shattered heart.  
By the time the movie was half way through, Bucky had fallen asleep within his head on top of yours, making you smile. Who were you to wake him? When the movie ended, you did end up waking a very groggy bucky and pulling him to his room. You covered him with his blanket and turned to leave when Bucky grabbed your hand and held open the blanket, beckoning you to sleep in his arms.
A smile spread across your face and you slipped into the bed. “Bucky?”
“Hmmm?” he hummed, already half asleep. 
“I like this new cuddly version of you…”
Bucky smiled. “Me too…” he mumbled, placing a soft kiss on your cheek before drifting off as he held you close.
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crownmemes · 4 months ago
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Concerned Sentences, Vol. 8
(Concerned sentences from various sources. Adjust phrasing where needed)
"I don't think you can go back to the way it was before."
"You look like you could use some company?"
"Are you sure you don't want to see a doctor?"
"I still think this is deeply irresponsible - and believe me, I would know!"
"Maybe you should tell me what's bothering you?"
"Research shows that it's easier to open up when relaxed. It allows you to talk about what's really bothering you."
"If I know you at all, this isn't the only reason you're here."
"You're acting like you've lost your mind!"
"I think you've had enough to drink."
"You've forgotten what it's like to feel emotions!"
"I've never seen much good come from looking to the past."
"Sometimes an emotional injury doesn't show itself right away."
"This may be something of an understatement, but you are not doing well."
"What secrets are darkening your brow?"
"Grief can drive people to extraordinary lengths."
"You're self-medicating with homemade drugs?"
"Shouldn't you be resting?"
"You do look stressed! Would you like some ginger tea? Or maybe just some gin?"
"If there's one thing I've learnt, it's you can't run away from your own life."
"Don't torture yourself with hypotheticals."
"I know this is serious, but you can still smile. You're allowed to enjoy things."
"I know you want to help me, but I don't think you can this time."
"You've always blamed yourself for things that weren't your fault."
"You can keep on telling yourself that you're fine, but you're not fine!"
"Don't worry about me. I don't want it, I don't need it. Just don't do it."
"If you keep going down this path, something really bad is going to happen."
"I know I don't know you well enough to say this, but you haven't seemed yourself lately."
"You haven't left the house in over a week! You can't just stay inside watching old movies all the time!"
"Does anyone know how sick you are?"
"I have experience with this - this sort of pain - and you can't escape it by building walls around your heart."
"You seem uncomfortable."
"When was the last time that you had a hug?"
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icarusredwings · 1 month ago
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Do you guys ever think about dementia Charles seeing Pietro and getting sad or becoming really happy because his poor mind connects the dots that he's Erik? It dosn't compute that this wouldn't be Erik because hes too young to be Erik rather assuming that he is young Erik and not exactly having the logic to understand that they are so differently aged.
"Oh! My old friend, you've gotten a haircut. Quite bold of you. It makes you look much younger."
".. yeah, yeah, old man.." he mutters, trying to avoid him best he can, but sometimes, when the others are busy, he can't stand to leave him alone. Coming to sit with him just to litsen to him gab about random nonsense, talking so fondly about his X-men and memories dear to him.
"Do you remember?"
"Do I remember what?"
"When Jean got her first bad grade and she cried to you about how cruel I was to her." He chuckles softly. "And all she got was a B-"
Pietro stares at him like he's crazy. Jean cried to his father? But why? He had his own children to take care of. So why would he treat her like that? It makes him a bit angry. "No.. I don't. What else?"
"Hm?"
"What else happened? With jean and my da- erm. Me."
"I believe it's Jean and I." He corrects his grammer, making the younger man roll his eyes in annoyance. Once a professor always a professor I guess.
"Sure. Jean and I.."
"You acussed me of being too hard on her, but when I explained it, you laughed... I haven't seen you laugh like that in so long.." It's sort of now that Charles remembers what's going on. Who he's talking to.
"..Im sorry. Who are you again?"
"Well you like to call me speedster."
"Pft. No I do not. Mr. Maximoff.. you've grown so big since the last time ive seen you."
'You just saw me yesterday' he thinks but makes that awkward smile and nods. "Yup.."
"Youll have to forgive me. Im not always.... here."
"I know.. are you alright?"
He shrugs in his chair. "About as alright as anyone could be in my situation." Ah yes. The paralyzed old bald man who was losing his mind still had jokes. Funny. But sad. He remembered him being so similar and yet.. so different.
It's not long before Jean comes to give him his medicine again, convincing him that it was for the kid's saftey. "You don't want to hurt them. Do you, Charles?"
"No... but I'm not that gone yet. I can decide when it's best to take my medication."
She smiles so sweetly at him. "Professor, you made this time schedule yourself. Im just doing what you told me. You always knew best for us."
"Oh.. well, alright then."
Before Jean can walk away, He stares at her.
"....Why did my father like you?"
"Excuse me?"
"Charles... he said.." He trails off, not sure how to say it without talking too quickly.
"He said you cried to my father. And.. he defended you."
Jean tilts her head. "I wouldn't say defended. I was just a child having a fit." She admits then shifts, looking at the walls as if remembering.
".. He was here a lot.. and then he just.. stopped coming. Im sorry. I don't know why. Like I said I was just-"
"Didyoureadhismind?"
"Uhm.. just a couple times."
"Jean used to con you into getting her ice cream." Charles smiles, closing his eyes, reminiscing.
"He.. got you ice cream?"
Jean's not dumb. She understands his frustrations, glancing at the old man and then to Pietro again. "Like I said.. I was just a kid.. I was just excited to be able to use my powers. I didn't mean anything by it. I didn't even know he had other children."
"...He never got us ice cream.. he didn't even bother sign my birth certificate.."
"Im sorry, Peter... Professor? Tonights dinner is potatoes gravy turkey with apple sauce. Remys making it so it might be a little spicy."
"Oh, that's alright. He means well. Erm.. thats the blue one right?"
Jean snorts. "No Professor. He's the card one."
"Oooh yes. Reeemmyy... right." He says his name slowly as if trying to connect 'the card one' to 'Remy' in his brain.
"...Bye Peter." She says, now awkwardly leaving.
"Remys that rat from the cooking movie" Pietro whispers and Charles' eyebrows raise. "Ahhh! Remy! That's right."
He might be an x-men. But he could still pull a little evil here and there.
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celtrist · 22 days ago
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This was a planned thing I had around the time I had this little rant (appreciate everyone who's bothered reading that thank you!)
Seeing as we have three canonically Asexual characters, I thought each of them having a different romantic orientation (and varying asexuality on the scale) would be fun and neat to show the variations to the orientations! But I was really stumped on Mammon since I was pretty set on Alastor and Octavia, but Mammon not being any form of aromantic didn't feel right, not terribly ooc, just definitely felt a bit more like "he's the leftovers" sort of thing when divvying up the romantic orientations. But lo and behold, the new episode of Helluva came out and helped solved that little quandrie. So here are my thoughts below on each!
Alastor (Loveless Aromantic) If you've seen my rant, you probably have a good idea why I labeled him as a "loveless aromantic" (meaning in this sense I'm talking about, he just wouldn't have any form of romantic affections or go into something like a QPR or the like). And I do genuinely think he would be! But I know there's A LOT of bias for Alastor NOT being aromantic (or at least open to some sort of relationship), and I will admit I might've been a bit biased here too! I've just seen a lot of love for only specific parts of the aro spectrum that "allows" Alastor to get with someone, and I wanted to give some love to the aro spectrum that gets little to no appreciation (plus I do just genuinely think he'd be this). If you don't agree, all is fair ദ്ദി(• ˕ •マ.ᐟ The point is, I realize I'm probably in the minority here. Plus, it's all a guessing game more or less until something is officially stated, which probably will never happen for any of these three.
Anyway, like I said, I just don't see Alastor really getting as close to anyone even as a QPR. At the VERY LEAST, not in a QPR that has a lot of romantic parts to it (kissing on the lips, cuddling, etc.). My man wouldn't have any interest in marriage or anything romantic, he's very happy on his own and probably gossips about OTHER people's love lives. Then again, he seemed pretty close to cracking when he heard Charlie ranting about her own love life... With that said, I do think he DOES like the company of others, he's VERY social after all. But actually, getting intimate with someone? Mmm, that doesn't feel right for him to me. A kiss on the cheek or PERHAPS a cuddle here and there at most, but nothing like bathing with someone or kissing with tongue. He's also a man of the roaring twenties, so you KNOW how he thinks about intimacies that might have no romantic/sexual connotations by themselves (like bathing with someone) are romantic on their own just because being that close to someone was seen that way in his time. Plus again, I just don't think he'd be interested in that stuff as is (potentially he could be both touch-starved and touch-aversed. And oh boy, wouldn't that be a conundrum!) On one hand, I like and can see Alastor being sex-repulsed, on the other I can also see him just feeling nothing towards it. Considering Angel's "advances" in both the first episode and the pilot, he does have a bit of a strong reaction towards sex, but nothing crazy either. I can see him being lukewarm to the subject (so he could read a book or read a script out loud with sex in it), but he could be repulsed when it actually INVOLVES HIM. I can definitely see him somewhat annoyed with the subject for how everywhere it is though.
Octavia (QPR Aromantic) It's a little hard to pinpoint, but I can personally see Octavia getting into a close QPR sooner than Alastor, but maaayybe only be a hair. Octavia could possibly get into a platonic relationship with someone that would have remnants of seeming romantic. I do think she's probably the most sex-repulsed of the three, if in part because of her father's inclinations that he doesn't seem to hide even when she's around. Honestly, I feel like we still haven't seen enough of her to get a good grasp on this aspect of her character in if she would be interested in getting as close as to a QPR with someone. But I'd certainly like to think so, because damn does our girl need it. Her falling into some sort of relationship would probably be hard seeing as how her parents' relationship was so awful. So she could be hesitant about doing something like that.
Mammon He was the big toughy! And while his advances on Leviathan might have been meant in a more platonic way or just for show to go against Ozzy's and Bee's romantic relations, I'm going with what's there! So Mammon seems like he could be straight or bi/pan. But I don't have a hard grasp on which so I'm tossing that in the air. I don't think he'd be sex-repulsed just because of how "sex makes money". Like, there's no question that sex appeal is a big part of business even if something isn't even that sexual. So while I think he's not largely interested in doing anything sexual, I can see him being okay or even lukewarm to the subject, maybe just not getting the appeal entirely. Maaaayybe he's sex-favorable? Of the three I would imagine he would be the most likely to be sex-favorable, but I dunno.
I like the idea of Octavia being the only one aware as to what her orientations are. Alastor is... well he's Alastor, and Mammon doesn't seem like he'd be too interested in the details of things. Just that "there's straight, gay, and the between area".
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st6rrrs · 10 months ago
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TRAITOR || rafe cameron x fem reader
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summary: the pogues find out yn's secret
warnings: cursing, arguing, soft rafe!!!, fluff?
a/n: idk if i should keep this into to a one shot or make a story!!!!
Part 2
˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗
you and rafe were in his bed talking when you realized what time it was, 5:29pm
"Shit rafe i gotta go" you said
you jumped off of the bed and quickly put your clothes on
"where are you going?" he asked getting off the bed also
"i gotta go to the chateau to meet up with the pogues"
he groaned.
you grab your backpack and head to the door but before you could open it rafe got in front of you.
"do you have to leave" rafe whines
"yes rafe, i'll be back in a couple of hours" you say
"fine" he groans again but louder this time, he walks back to the bed laying on it getting his phone out, you roll your eyes and exit the room.
˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗
you get on your bike and start pedaling towards the cut.
you and rafe have been dating for a couple of months now but you guys haven't told anyone yet. if the pogues find out that you and rafe have been dating they would be PISSED
thats one of the reasons you dont wanna go public, rafe honestly doesn't give a shit if anyone finds out because he will still love you and you would still love him.
you arrive at the chateau and you see the pogues on the front porch, Sarah was sitting next to john b? why was Sarah here?
kie disliked Sarah for as long as you can remember. When kie and Sarah were friends Sarah threw this party without inviting kie and kie got mad and called the cops.
"you know we were all extremely comfortable until you brought her."
you hear kie say as you approach them
"stop talking about me like im not here" Sarah says
"then leave."
"umm whats happening?" you mouth to pope and jj passing kie, Sarah, and john b them to busy arguing to notice you. You walk over to sit in between jj and pope.
"john b is banging Sarah" jj says while laughing
"WHAT" you almost yell
"oh look y/n is here, why dont we ask her opinion is on this" kie says
"please don't" you whine "but if im being honest i dont think its a good idea"
Sarah's scoffs
"oh you can talk" she says looking at you
"what?" you laugh
"like you aren't fucking my brother" she says rolling her eyes and looking away
you immediately go pale.
"is that true y/n?" kie ask you in disbelief
you don't answer her
jj gets up from beside you and just looks at you in disbelief. you look over at pope his hand on his forehead and he's shaking his head disappointed.
"you cant be fucking serious!" jj yells at you "he beat up pope with a golf club and then jumped us with topper and kelce"
jj has had a crush on you ever since you guys were 14 but you didn't feel the same way. Everyone always shipped you guys together but you wouldn't force yourself to date someone you didn't like You only liked jj as a friend but he never really listened to you.
"i-i-im sorry!! but he's different with me" you try to explain to them
"hes just gonna use you like he does every other girl on this island" Sarah says
"no he-" but before you could finish your sentence pope interrupted you
"just leave y/n." he said annoyed not looking at you
"g-guys please!"
"JUST FUCKING LEAVE JEEZ!" jj yells at you, you have never seen him this angry in the whole 7 years you knew him.
tears rolled down your cheeks as you looked at him. He had no remorse for what he said he was very angry and you could understand why but none of them even gave you a chance to explain yourself. You quickly grabbed your bag pack and left without looking back.
"AND DONT BOTHER COMING BACK EITHER! HAVE FUN WITH YOUR KOOKY BOYFRIEND" jj yelled before you could leave
˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ' -
you open the front door to the camerons household, rafe gave you the key when you guys started dating. the house was so quite and cold, you walk up the stairs to rafe room still sobbing.
you open his room door and hes sleep on his bed, it was sometime pass 7 you didn't want to wake him and you were exhausted yourself so you just laid next to him and got under the covers still sobbing quietly. you couldn't believe that jj would ever say that too you, it wasn't like him
you hear rafe groan awake
"y/n is that you" he says in his sleepy voice
"yea"
"are you crying?"
"im fine go back to sleep rafe."
"no.,whats wrong come here" he gestured so you could lay on his chest
you gave in and sobbed in his chest for a while until you fell asleep.
part 2?
this might be bad but i tried 😪 👍🏻
taglist:
@bbsxsaa @xxbutdaddyilovehimxx @drewstarkeyslut @stvrkey. @blondbrat @sevenwivesofrafecameron @tracymbcm
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hms-no-fun · 1 month ago
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Hi! I just read your post about your opinion on "AI" and I really liked it. If it's no bother, what's your opinion on people who use it for studying? Like writing essays, solving problems and stuff like that?
I haven't been a fan of AI from the beginning and I've heard that you shouldn't ask it for anything because then you help it develop. But I don't know how to explain that to friends and classmates or even if it's true anymore. Because I've seen some of the prompts it can come up with and they're not bad and I've heard people say that the summaries AI makes are really good and I just... I dunno. I'm at a loss
Sorry if this is a lot or something you simply don't want to reply to. You made really good points when talking about AI and I really liked it and this has been weighing on me for a while :)
on a base level, i don't really have a strongly articulated opinion on the subject because i don't use AI, and i'm 35 so i'm not in school anymore and i don't have a ton of college-aged friends either. i have little exposure to the people who use AI in this way nor to the people who have to deal with AI being used in this way, so my perspective here is totally hypothetical and unscientific.
what i was getting at in my original AI post was a general macroeconomic point about how all of the supposed efficiency gains of AI are an extension of the tech CEO's dislike of paying and/or giving credit to anyone they deem less skilled or intelligent than them. that it's conspicuous how AI conveniently falls into place after many decades of devaluing and deskilling creative/artistic labor industries. historically, for a lot of artists the most frequently available & highest paying gigs were in advertising. i can't speak to the specifics when it comes to visual art or written copy, but i *can* say that when i worked in the oklahoma film industry, the most coveted jobs were always the commercials. great pay for relatively less work, with none of the complications that often arise working on amateur productions. not to mention they were union gigs, a rare enough thing in a right to work state, so anyone trying to make a career out of film work wanting to bank their union hours to qualify for IATSE membership always had their ears to the ground for an opening. which didn't come often because, as you might expect, anyone who *got* one of those jobs aimed to keep it as long as possible. who could blame em, either? one person i met who managed to get consistent ad work said they could afford to work all of two or three months a year, so they could spend the rest of their time doing low-budget productions and (occasionally) student films.
there was a time when this was the standard for the film industry, even in LA; you expected to work 3 to 5 shows a year (exact number's hard to estimate because production schedules vary wildly between ads, films, and tv shows) for six to eight months if not less, so you'd have your bills well covered through the lean periods and be able to recover from what is an enormously taxing job both physically and emotionally. this was never true for EVERYONE, film work's always been a hustle and making a career of it is often a luck-based crapshoot, but generally that was the model and for a lot of folks it worked. it meant more time to practice their skills on the job, sustainably building expertise and domain knowledge that they could then pass down to future newcomers. anything that removes such opportunities decreases the amount of practice workers get, and any increased demand on their time makes them significantly more likely to burn out of the industry early. lower pay, shorter shoots, busier schedules, these aren't just bad for individual workers but for the entire industry, and that includes the robust and well-funded advertising industry.
well, anyway, this year's coca-cola christmas ad was made with AI. they had maybe one person on quality control using an adobe aftereffects mask to add in the coke branding. this is the ultimate intended use-case for AI. it required the expertise of zero unionized labor, and worst of all the end result is largely indistinguishable from the alternative. you'll often see folks despair at this verisimilitude, particularly when a study comes out that shows (for instance) people can't tell the difference between real poetry and chat gpt generated poetry. i despair as well, but for different reasons. i despair that production of ads is a better source of income and experience for film workers than traditional movies or television. i despair that this technology is fulfilling an age-old promise about the disposability of artistic labor. poetry is not particularly valued by our society, is rarely taught to people beyond a beginner's gloss on meter and rhyme. "my name is sarah zedig and i'm here to say, i'm sick of this AI in a major way" type shit. end a post with the line "i so just wish that it would go away and never come back again!" and then the haiku bot swoops in and says, oh, 5/7/5 you say? that is technically a haiku! and then you put a haiku-making minigame in your crowd-pleasing japanese nationalist open world chanbara simulator, because making a haiku is basically a matter of selecting one from 27 possible phrase combinations. wait, what do you mean the actual rules of haiku are more elastic and subjective than that? that's not what my english teacher said in sixth grade!
AI is able to slip in and surprise us with its ability to mimic human-produced art because we already treat most human-produced art like mechanical surplus of little to no value. ours is a culture of wikipedia-level knowledge, where you have every incentive to learn a lot of facts about something so that you can sufficiently pretend to have actually experienced it. but this is not to say that humans would be better able to tell the difference between human produced and AI produced poetry if they were more educated about poetry! the primary disconnect here is economic. Poets already couldn't make a fucking living making poetry, and now any old schmuck can plug a prompt into chatgpt and say they wrote a sonnet. even though they always had the ability to sit down and write a sonnet!
boosters love to make hay about "deskilling" and "democratizing" and "making accessible" these supposedly gatekept realms of supposedly bourgeois expression, but what they're really saying (whether they know it or not) is that skill and training have no value anymore. and they have been saying this since long before AI as we know it now existed! creative labor is the backbone of so much of our world, and yet it is commonly accepted as a poverty profession. i grew up reading books and watching movies based on books and hearing endless conversation about books and yet when i told my family "i want to be a writer" they said "that's a great way to die homeless." like, this is where the conversation about AI's impact starts. we already have a culture that simultaneously NEEDS the products of artistic labor, yet vilifies and denigrates the workers who perform that labor. folks see a comic panel or a corporate logo or a modern art piece and say "my kid could do that," because they don't perceive the decades of training, practice, networking, and experimentation that resulted in the finished product. these folks do not understand that just because the labor of art is often invisible doesn't mean it isn't work.
i think this entire conversation is backwards. in an ideal world, none of this matters. human labor should not be valued over machine labor because it inherently possesses an aura of human-ness. art made by humans isn't better than AI generated art on qualitative grounds. art is subjective. you're not wrong to find beauty in an AI image if the image is beautiful. to my mind, the value of human artistic labor comes down to the simple fact that the world is better when human beings make art. the world is better when we have the time and freedom to experiment, to play, to practice, to develop and refine our skills to no particular end except whatever arbitrary goal we set for ourselves. the world is better when people collaborate on a film set to solve problems that arise organically out of the conditions of shooting on a live location. what i see AI being used for is removing as many opportunities for human creativity as possible and replacing them with statistical averages of prior human creativity. this passes muster because art is a product that exists to turn a profit. because publicly traded companies have a legal responsibility to their shareholders to take every opportunity to turn a profit regardless of how obviously bad for people those opportunities might be.
that common sense says writing poetry, writing prose, writing anything is primarily about reaching the end of the line, about having written something, IS the problem. i've been going through the many unfinished novels i wrote in high school lately, literally hundreds of thousands of words that i shared with maybe a dozen people and probably never will again. what value do those words have? was writing them a waste of time since i never posted them, never finished them, never turned a profit off them? no! what i've learned going back through those old drafts is that i'm only the writer i am today BECAUSE i put so many hours into writing generic grimdark fantasy stories and bizarrely complicated werewolf mythologies.
you know i used to do open mics? we had a poetry group that met once a month at a local cafe in college. each night we'd start by asking five words from the audience, then inviting everyone to compose a poem using those words in 10 to 15 minutes. whoever wanted to could read their poem, and whoever got the most applause won a free drink from the cafe. then we'd spend the rest of the night having folks sign up to come and read whatever. sometimes you'd get heartfelt poems about personal experiences, sometimes you'd get ambitious soundcloud rappers, sometimes you'd get a frat guy taking the piss, sometimes you'd get a mousy autist just doing their best. i don't know that any of the poetry i wrote back then has particular value today, but i don't really care. the point of it was the experience in that moment. the experience of composing something on the fly, or having something you wrote a couple days ago, then standing up and reading it. the value was in the performance itself, in the momentary synthesis between me and the audience. i found out then that i was pretty good at making people cry, and i could not have had that experience in any other venue. i could not have felt it so viscerally had i just posted it online. and i cannot wrap up that experience and give it to you, because it only existed then.
i think more people would write poetry if they had more hours in a day to spare for frivolities, if there existed more spaces where small groups could organize open mics, if transit made those spaces more widely accessible, if everyone made enough money that they weren't burned the fuck out and not in the mood to go to an open mic tonight, if we saw poetry as a mode of personal reflection which was as much about the experience of having written it as anything else. this is the case for all the arts. right now, the only people who can afford to make a living doing art are already wealthy, because art doesn't pay well. this leads to brain drain and overall lowering quality standards, because the suburban petty bouge middle class largely do not experience the world as it materially exists for the rest of us. i often feel that many tech CEOs want to be remembered the way andy warhol is remembered. they want to be loved and worshipped not just for business acumen but for aesthetic value, they want to get the kind of credit that artists get-- because despite the fact that artists don't get paid shit, they also frequently get told by people "your work changed my life." how is it that a working class person with little to no education can write a story that isn't just liked but celebrated, that hundreds or thousands of people imprint on, that leaves a mark on culture you can't quantify or predict or recreate? this is AI's primary use-case, to "democratize" art in such a way that hacks no longer have to work as hard to pretend to be good at what they do. i mean, hell, i have to imagine every rich person with an autobiography in the works is absolutely THRILLED that they no longer have to pay a ghost writer!
so, circling back around to the meat of your question. as far as telling people not to use AI because "you're just helping to train it," that ship has long since sailed. getting mad at individuals for using AI right now is about as futile as getting mad at individuals for not masking-- yes, obviously they should wear a mask and write their own essays, but to say this is simply a matter of millions of individuals making the same bad but unrelated choice over and over is neoliberal hogwash. people stopped masking because they were told to stop masking by a government in league with corporate interests which had every incentive to break every avenue of solidarity that emerged in 2020. they politicized masks, calling them "the scarlet letter of [the] pandemic". biden himself insisted this was "a pandemic of the unvaccinated", helpfully communicating to the public that if you're vaccinated, you don't need to mask. all those high case numbers and death counts? those only happen to the bad people.
now you have CEOs and politicians and credulous media outlets and droves of grift-hungry influencers hard selling the benefits of AI in everything everywhere all the time. companies have bent over backwards to incorporate AI despite ethics and security worries because they have a fiduciary responsibility to their shareholders, and everyone with money is calling this the next big thing. in short, companies are following the money, because that's what companies do. they, in turn, are telling their customers what tools to use and how. so of course lots of people are using AI for things they probably shouldn't. why wouldn't they? "the high school/college essay" as such has been quantized and stripmined by an education system dominated by test scores over comprehension. it is SUPPOSED to be an exercise in articulating ideas, to teach the student how to argue persuasively. the final work has little to no value, because the point is the process. but when you've got a system that lives and dies by its grades, within which teachers are given increasingly more work to do, less time to do it in, and a much worse paycheck for their trouble, the essay increasingly becomes a simple pass/fail gauntlet to match the expected pace set by the simple, clean, readily gradable multiple choice quiz. in an education system where the stakes for students are higher than they've ever been, within which you are increasingly expected to do more work in less time with lower-quality guidance from your overworked teachers, there is every incentive to get chatgpt to write your essay for you.
do you see what i'm saying? we can argue all day about the shoulds here. of course i think it's better when people write their own essays, do their own research, personally read the assigned readings. but cheating has always been a problem. a lot of these same fears were aired over the rising popularity of cliffs notes in the 90s and 2000s! the real problem here is systemic. it's economic. i would have very little issue with the output of AI if existing conditions were not already so precarious. but then, if the conditions were different, AI as we know it likely would not exist. it emerges today as the last gasp of a tech industry that has been floundering for a reason to exist ever since the smart phone dominated the market. they tried crypto. they tried the metaverse. now they're going all-in on AI because it's a perfect storm of shareholder-friendly buzzwords and the unscientific technomythology that's been sold to laymen by credulous press sycophants for decades. It slots right into this niche where the last of our vestigial respect for "the artist" once existed. it is the ultimate expression of capitalist realism, finally at long last doing away with the notion that the suits at disney could never in their wildest dreams come up with something half as cool as the average queer fanfic writer. now they've got a program that can plagiarize that fanfic (along with a dozen others) for them, laundering the theft through a layer of transformation which perhaps mirrors how the tech industry often exploits open source software to the detriment of the open source community. the catastrophe of AI is that it's the fulfillment of a promise that certainly predates computers at the very least.
so, i don't really know what to tell someone who uses AI for their work. if i was talking to a student, i'd say that relying chatgpt is really gonna screw you over when it comes time take the SAT or ACT, and you have to write an essay from scratch by hand in a monitored environment-- but like, i also think the ACT and SAT and probably all the other standardized tests shouldn't exist? or at the very least ought to be severely devalued, since prep for those tests often sabotages the integrity of actual classroom education. although, i guess at this point the only way forward for education (that isn't getting on both knees and deep-throating big tech) is more real-time in-class monitored essay writing, which honestly might be better for all parties anyway. of course that does nothing to address research essays you can't write in a single class session. to someone who uses AI for research, i'd probably say the same thing as i would to someone who uses wikipedia: it's a fine enough place to start, but don't cite it. click through links, find sources, make sure what you're reading is real, don't rely on someone else's generalization. know that chatgpt is likely not pulling information from a discrete database of individual files that it compartmentalizes the way you might expect, but rather is a statistical average of a broad dataset about which it cannot have an opinion or interpretation. sometimes it will link you to real information, but just as often it will invent information from whole cloth. honestly, the more i talk it out, the more i realize all this advice is basically identical to the advice adults were giving me in the early 2000s.
which really does cement for me that the crisis AI is causing in education isn't new and did not come from nowhere. before chatgpt, students were hiring freelancers on fiverr. i already mentioned cliffs notes. i never used any of these in college, but i'll also freely admit that i rarely did all my assigned reading. i was the "always raises her hand" bitch, and every once in a while i'd get other students who were always dead silent in class asking me how i found the time to get the reading done. i'd tell them, i don't. i read the beginning, i read the ending, and then i skim the middle. whenever a word or phrase jumps out at me, i make a note of it. that way, when the professor asks a question in class, i have exactly enough specific pieces of information at hand to give the impression of having done the reading. and then i told them that i learned how to do this from the very same professor that was teaching that class. the thing is, it's not like i learned nothing from this process. i retained quite a lot of information from those readings! this is, broadly, a skill that emerges from years of writing and reading essays. but then you take a step back and remember that for most college students (who are not pursuing any kind of arts degree), this skillset is relevant to an astonishingly minimal proportion of their overall course load. college as it exists right now is treated as a jobs training program, within which "the essay" is a relic of an outdated institution that highly valued a generalist liberal education where today absolute specialization seems more the norm. so AI comes in as the coup de gras to that old institution. artists like myself may not have the constitution for the kind of work that colleges now exist to funnel you into, but those folks who've never put a day's thought into the work of making art can now have a computer generate something at least as good at a glance as basically anything i could make. as far as the market is concerned, that's all that matters. the contents of an artwork, what it means to its creator, the historic currents it emerges out of, these are all technicalities that the broad public has been well trained not to give a shit about most of the time. what matters is the commodity and the economic activity it exists to generate.
but i think at the end of the day, folks largely want to pay for art made by human beings. that it's so hard for a human being to make a living creating and selling art is a question far older than AI, and whose answer hasn't changed. pay workers more. drastically lower rents. build more affordable housing. make healthcare free. make education free. massively expand public transit. it is simply impossible to overstate how much these things alone would change the conversation about AI, because it would change the conversation about everything. SO MUCH of the dominance of capital in our lives comes down to our reliance on cars for transit (time to get a loan and pay for insurance), our reliance on jobs for health insurance (can't quit for moral reasons if it's paying for your insulin), etc etc etc. many of AI's uses are borne out of economic precarity and a ruling class desperate to vacuum up every loose penny they can find. all those billionaires running around making awful choices for the rest of us? they stole those billions. that is where our security went. that is why everything is falling apart, because the only option remaining to *every* institutional element of society is to go all-in on the profit motive. tax these motherfuckers and re-institute public arts funding. hey, did you know the us government used to give out grants to artists? did you know we used to have public broadcast networks where you could make programs that were shown to your local community? why the hell aren't there public youtube clones? why aren't there public transit apps? why aren't we CONSTANTLY talking about nationalizing these abusive fucking industries that are falling over themselves to integrate AI because their entire modus operandi is increasing profits regardless of product quality?
these are the questions i ask myself when i think about solutions to the AI problem. tech needs to be regulated, the monopolies need breaking up, but that's not enough. AI is a symptom of a much deeper illness whose treatment requires systemic solutions. and while i'm frustrated when i see people rely on AI for their work, or otherwise denigrate artists who feel AI has devalued their field, on some level i can't blame them. they are only doing what they've been told to do. all of which merely strengthens my belief in the necessity of an equitable socialist future (itself barely step zero in the long path towards a communist future, and even that would only be a few steps on the even longer path to a properly anarchist future). improve the material conditions and you weaken the dominance of capitalist realism, however minutely. and while there are plenty of reasons to despair at the likelihood of such a future given a second trump presidency, i always try to remember that socialist policies are very popular and a *lot* of that popularity emerged during the first trump administration. the only wrong answer here is to assume that losing an election is the same thing as losing a war, that our inability to put the genie back in its bottle means we can't see our own wishes granted.
i dunno if i answered your question but i sure did say a lot of stuff, didn't i?
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adhd-fandom-hyperfocus · 2 months ago
Text
Secret Box
Sorry no fancy formatting or anything here. I got sudden inspired to write this from an anon @moodymisty got Tagging @kit-williams because I know Mr. Turbo is her man Warnings: Hints of NSFW stuff at the very end. Sorry if Turbo sounds ooc I haven't written him at all before so be kind. Also, did not proofread this. MINOR DNI
"Oh I don't know, I would be unhappy too if all I had to was tear things down and war. Maybe he wants to something else?"
"What do you mean? He seems quite happy breaking things."
He watched you frown so deeply, "My little bother was like that, everyone thought he like being mad. Just did not know how to convey his feelings, and felt like he had to stay under father's thumb. But he really just wanted to be an artist. I loved his art!"
"I didn't know you had a brother, where is he?"
"Dead. Died angry and lonely because father wanted a soldier."
His furious hearts stopped in his chest. You saw him. You did not realize it, but you did. It scared him, mad him want to rage and break you. It made him want to keep you close. Show you those things he wanted to forget.
***
"What in the Emperor's name is that?"
"Oh one of those puzzle boxes, some call them secret boxes because once you open them you can keep little important secrets in them!" your smile makes his head spin and his stomach lurch.
He wanted you to smile at him like that more. He needed you to talk to him about the silly little boxes.
"Why do you have so many? They seem pointless, we do not have anything to keep in them."
"Oh, I am far too stupid to open them, but I find them beautiful, each one looks different, opens differently, and all so complex, like people!"
***
Weeks he slaved over his workbench, keeping this secret to all, which was made easy when got the small chance to engage with you. Or most commonly, watch you interact with others, needed to make sure you didn't give his secrets away; at least he tried to convince himself of that.
You thought yourself stupid, but you figured him out in a way not even the damn Emperor himself could. What looked so simple was perhaps the most complex of all.
You wanted to see the art he could create that wasn't for war, how his mind could do if allowed to run free. Called his work art, like it was something to also marvel at.
The primarch looked over his newest creation, the small box was intricate in it's design, how he liked things. But it was what was inside that made his chest feel weak, and yet made him powerful all the same. The primarch of iron was feeling himself soften at the heat that had made a permanent home in his lower abdomen.
When he presented the box to you he did not say he made it, refused to. But as he explained his lie, the look you cast at him shocked him. You knew his bluff. Of course you did.
"Well, whoever made this is a true master! I have never seen something to beautiful before, thank you my lord," you smile up at him, letting him keep his pride and secret, "I know you are a busy man, but should you remember who made this could you be so kind to your serf and tell me?"
Prutabo grunted and nodded, "If I feel so inclined. Let me know if and when you open it."
***
Days and weeks pass and you keep him updated with your progress, he makes comments that hint he isn't too interested, after all someone of his genius would have opened it already. You agree, but you won't give up. You determination makes his hearts feel like they are in knots. How happy and joyful you are over his little toy. The fun you find in testing yourself only just to say you did it. The moments of you updating him live inside his dreams, where he is brave enough to hold your hand and smile back.
The crusade had called him away and like always it kept him longer than anyone else. While his brothers got to reap all the glory he was cleanup, or the brunt hammer to break wills. So of course when the Lord of Iron returned everyone scattered. Hid like cowards.
Not you. Even with him exuding even more of his dour demeanor you came running up to him. Puzzle box in hand.
"My Lord! I know you just returned, but I have been waiting for teran weeks for you to return." you were overflowing with excitement; practically vibrating with it.
It was like a disease that spread quickly, because as you spoke his ire cooled. You were happy he was home.
"Make it quick." though he hoped you took as long as you wanted.
"I am about to open the box, and I wanted to open it with you!" you grin up at him coming closer, "Exciting right?"
You...waited for him. Wanted to share in his happiness with...Throne he thought he was going to burst out of his armor and into flames.
"For someone who cannot easily solve things, I suppose. Well, open it." he grumbled, fighting to keep his mask on.
As you moved the last piece into place and opened the lid, a centerpiece rose up, and thereupon it was a metal sculpting of morning glories rising up and in bloom, the spun slowly as music played. And resting inside the main flower was a small ring, designed to look like vines holding a blooming rose the held a pink diamond.
Oh the look upon your face he would have waited lifetimes just to see it. It made this little box the greatest thing he would ever fashion.
"My Lord...I...forgive me, my words are failing." you whisper still marveling at the spinning flowers, "I love morning glories..."
Perturabo nodded, "I am aware. I do listen..." he wanted to know about the ring, wanted you to wear it.
Let everyone know you were his. That you wanted to be his.
Tears well up in your eyes as you so gingerly take the ring. Without needing to ask he gently holds the box so you might place it upon one of your fingers. He watches intently as you try various fingers before putting it upon your ring finger.
"My..."
"Perturabo. You can call me by my name...should you wish to continue to wear that ring." he spoke so very softly for himself.
Thorne, he needed you to keep it on.
"I will, Perturabo," you say his name to see how it rolls off your tongue and it sounds like heaven to him.
When this crusade is over he will fill this place with sounds of your and his children, and he will cast off all this cold machinery for things that truly mattered to him. Being a toy maker in one's spare time wasn't such a foolish notion. He would not die like your brother, and leave you alone.
"Are you sure you want...I mean... I am a serf, people will talk and I do not want to tarnish your name." you whisper to him, eyes fixed on the ring.
"They would be foolish to speak of it where I can hear." was all he offered.
Your small hands slip over his covered in his massive gauntlets, and he was trembling to get this armor off.
"My Lady, if it pleases you," his voice low and he leaned in close so no other could hear, "I wish to remove this armor, if you would wait for me in my chambers..." he couldn't believe he was doing this! Smoothness and words were not his strong points, but for you, he would try, "There is a puzzle I would like to get to know intimately, work with my hands, would you be willing?"
His face burned as he waited what felt like eons for you to reply. Was this all too much too fast? Was he being a fool?
You take the music puzzle box from him and when you pull back you are smiling with cheeks as flushed as his, "I would love that. Now go before your men see you this shade of red and not yelling. I do not want to ruin your reputation." you tease
Perturabo smiled, "You, I will allow to ruin me." he said before tearing off to get this damn armor off.
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mikaela-the-slut-expert · 1 year ago
Text
The First Glance
Hua Cheng x M!Reader x Xie Lian
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Honestly I'm just having a go at this and I'm technically writing about my OC. If people notice it that's good. if they don't well😔. So don't hate on me 🖤✨
Mentions of the reader having a veil and white hair, facial scars.
No one has requested any stories from me I wrote this for my own pleasure. So if you want something that isn't for an OC and is for a reader then come tell me and I'll write you something 😋
I keep editing the story cuz I keep forgetting details 😭✊ bear with me plz.
Míngqín means song bird it's Y/n's nickname
Previous part: Tea Shop
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You've been by Xie Lian's side for a long time. You've been his guard for as long as you can remember, and a god under him for even longer. A very long time actually, so you'd like to think you know him well enough to predict his movements. Apparently not.
You're at Puqi shrine, cleaning the place up and fixing dinner for you and Xie Lian. You chose to stay while Xie Lian went and to go investigate a ghost groom who was kidnapping brides. It's since then turned dark and when Xie Lian turns up, there's another man with him. You weren't expecting Xie Lian to bring someone home with him, nor were you expecting the strange man to stay the night.
The strange man's name is actually San Lang, but you still think he's strange anyways. After scolding Xie Lian for bringing someone home without any warning you serve dinner at the makeshift table you came up with. You give San Lang yours, you don't really need to eat. You're a heaven official and being with Xie Lian has you used to it anyhow.
"Thank you for making dinner Míngqín, I wouldn't have minded making it myself", Xie Lian says. You cringe at the thought though. You wave a hand, "not necessary I've got it". You sit down and observe as they both eat. Xie Lian and San Lang chat about something but you aren't paying attention. You're staring at San Lang, it's strange how fast the man has clung himself to Xie Lian. You've never seen him before and yet he so easily acts as if he's known Xie Lian forever.
You look away, thoughts straying to the bed laying on the floor. If it can even be called that it's more like a mat. Are all three of you going to sleep on it? Your thoughts are quickly interrupted when you notice San Lang staring at you. He can't possibly see your face not with the veil you've hidden it behind, but the way he's staring at you makes it feel like he's trying to. It doesn't feel like anything bad or alarming, just unnerving. People don't look at you. They usually stray their eyes away, but San Lang does not.
You leave the table, and lie on the mat. Xie Lian and San Lang will eventually lay down too. You take the middle spot. It makes the most sense, you don't want Xie Lian to be in danger. He's always been kind and you don't want that to back fire on him. You figure it's most safe if you stay between San Lang and Xie Lian.
You are already 'asleep', you aren't of course but you're breathing and heartbeat all sound as if you are. You technically don't need sleep but it's still nice to rest sometimes. You can hear San Lang talk about the missing painting on the wall. There's not yet a painting of the God of Scraps, but Xie Lian ushers San Lang to go to sleep instead.
Xie Lian lies to your right, you can tell. After all you've been sleeping next to each other for years. San Lang lies to your left, leaving you stuck in the middle. It's uncomfortable. You aren't worried about your veil slipping off, it's yours to manipulate and you've long since mastered being able to make the veil comfortable on your face. It's the closeness that bothers you.
You haven't really been in anyone's company other than Xie Lian's. No one else tends to like you, not the officials and not ghosts. That's fine you don't like them either but this sudden presence is new and you've never liked touch in the first place. Touch is scary. It always has been since the fall of XianLe. It makes you want to puke. Xie Lian is the only exception to this, seeing as you've been around him your whole life.
It's not that repulsive actually. For whatever reason San Lang's closeness doesn't seem to make you want to hurl. His breath down the back of your neck however makes you nervous. If you weren't a ghost your heart would be beating fast. You can feel him staring holes into you but you play sleep anyways.
"You're not truly asleep are you?" You internally huff as San Lang asks. You didn't think you were bad at it. You ignore him and continue hoping he'll believe your lie. It's not until a shuffle on your right, and a harsh grip on your robes make you realize San Lang isn't talking to you.
"It's not like I was fake sleeping San Lang" you can feel Xie Lian sit up a bit. "You aren't asleep either" Xie Lian exclaims. You can't see of course your eyes are closed even behind the veil you're worried they'd see your eyes open.
"I was too busy staring at your assistant" his voice takes on a teasing tone. 'Assistant' is what Xie Lian had told San Lang you are. Xie Lian is supposed to be a priest for himself and your alias is to be Xie Lian's assistant. Of course it's not who you truly are. You're truly the God of Song and Xie Lian is truly the God of Scraps. San Lang wouldn't know that though.
Your stomach drops when you feel San Lang's hand start to tinker with your veil. You're about to give it all up to move away but a big clap happens right over your face. You suppose it's time to give it up for the night. You open your eyes, and look up at the clasped hands above you. Xie Lian's holding San Lang's, most likely trying to move his hand away.
"Ah I'm sorry we woke you Míngqín, San Lang just needed a blanket he was cold..." Xie Lian smiles down at you. You nod, "It's okay. Let's go back to sleep then." San Lang only laughs to himself and lies back down. You and Xie Lian lay back down too. The night eventually calms again.
**********************************************************
When morning comes, you realize you fell asleep and when you get out of bed you see that Xie Lian and San Lang have already gotten out of bed. You get up as well and you change your veil. The veil is often changed, you don't like keeping the same design everyday. Some veils cover your whole face, and some veils leave your eyes unhidden. Today you choose a veil that only covers your nose and mouth.
You're ready to go outside until something in the corner of your eye stops you. A painting of Xie Lian back when he was Prince in XianLe..? Did San Lang really paint that? Now it's obvious San Lang isn't a mortal. No one would be able to paint it so accurately from 800 years ago.
You admire it for a minute and then go outside. San Lang and Xie Lian are standing by a cut wood pile. They both turn their heads toward you.
"Good morning Míngqín", "morning y/n". You nod back, noticing San Lang's hair is loose.
"Your hair will surely get caught if you don't put your hair up, San Lang" you haven't really spoken to San Lang the whole time since he's been here but you don't hate him. He did somehow make that painting after all. "Let me fix your hair San Lang" Xie Lian offers. He leads San Lang back inside to a bucket of water.
You know Xie Lian is checking if San Lang is a ghost, but San Lang looks like he is enjoying himself, "Are you just going to play with my hair gege?" Xie Lian is quick to get flustered and he puts San Lang's hair into a very messy braid. It looks messier than before.
You don't pay attention to the fact San Lang has started calling Xie Lian 'gege'. You snicker quietly at Xie Lian's flustered face, as he waves his hands telling San Lang he's all done with his hair. Xie Lian is not very good at doing hair, but San Lang looks happy with it. You don't bother offering to fix it.
"A-Lian it's your turn, come sit". You pat the stool. Xie Lian cooperates and you start combing through his hair. You've always brushed out Xie Lian's hair. He doesn't know how to get the knots out. Xie Lian used to just leave the knots there until you forced him to sit down one day so you could brush it out.
When you're finished brushing his hair you tie it up in his usual half bun-half down hairstyle. You step away from him and notice San Lang staring at you. It seems he's very good at staring.
"You should let gege do your hair as well y/n" you grunt and shake your head. No way you were letting Xie Lian put knots in your hair. You love him very much but you also love your hair.
"No it's alright" you wave a hand but San Lang insists. "I can fix your hair then. Gege did my hair, and you did Gege's. I'll do yours" he smiles. It sounds like generosity, but you've found whatever San Lang says sounds like teasing. You almost shake your head no, but San Lang looks like he really wants to indulge.
"I... Suppose" you hesitate. To fix your hair you would have to take off your veil and only Xie Lian has seen your face and even he hasn't seen it in so long. San Lang is very gentle when he removes your veil, as if he's touching something that will shatter. You cover your mouth with your sleeve. To hide the scars, you don't want them to be seen.
Your thoughts are interrupted by San Lang's fingers running through your hair. He combs it out gently. "Your hair is very beautiful y/n, has gege ever told you?" This flusters you, if you actually had the ability to blush then blood would have colored your cheeks. You have strange hair, it's long but it's white. It's always been like that but after ascending the officials were not your biggest fans. Especially since you stayed with Xie Lian. So they often make remarks about your appearance not that it bothers you.
"Thank you" you notice Xie Lian looking at you. You're eyes are the only thing that can be seen but he's still soaking up what you've hidden for the past hundreds of years before you hide it behind a veil again.
"How come this one hides his face?" San Lang asks as he does something with your hair. You don't know how to answer that so you redirect, "Does San Lang want to see it that bad?" He only laughs at this, and he moves into your field of vision. "I'm all finished. Gege take a look at y/n's hair is it nice?" You want to see what it looks like. You look into the bucket of water.
San Lang put your hair into a braid. He's tied your hair with a red ribbon, it must be San Lang's but you'll keep it. He gave it to you so it's only fair. You run your hands over the braid. Your hair hasn't been styled in a long time, there was never a reason to put it up after all. Your hair is usually left loose.
"it's very pretty San Lang. Míngqín why don't you keep the veil off?" Xie Lian cocks his head to the side. "Yes, there's no reason to hide your face." You furrow your brows, you could keep it off. You're just scared to have your scars out in the open. "... I'll think about it."
You hesitate, but you remove your hand from covering your mouth. To you, your face has been ruined. Your mouth has been slashed from a sword from a very long time ago. Scars line over your lips. You wished that they were pretty scars, with neat lines. They are not though. It's not so bad to show your face to San Lang and Xie Lian.
They stare at you, Xie Lian's look you can understand. You don't understand San Lang's look, he looks as if he's trying to soak up the details of your face too. As if your face is something he hasn't seen in such a long time. You've never met San Lang though...
Now that everyone's hair is fixed, San Lang is an exception to that - y/n giggles every time he sees it - , now they can start their morning. It's a good start to the day and Y/n thinks that San Lang has fit himself quite well into their routine.
Even though San Lang is a new addition to your group he makes it very easy to like him. Especially with how much he clings to Xie Lian's side, but San Lang also seems to be clinging to you too.
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Criticism or comments plzzzz, I want to know if anyone enjoyed it or if there are ways I can make it better. I also want to know if people want to continue seeing the story! Also don't forget you can request me for stuff! 🖤✨
Maple Robes and Lace Veils
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blackbirdi · 8 months ago
Text
One-Sided pt. II
If you haven't read the first part already, the link to part 1 is here
I'm so sorry this took so long, guys, I was struggling with ideas. Anyways, enjoy :)
Brief Description: Sirius begins to notice how suddenly you're around him a lot less than usual. What could he have done to make you want to avoid him at all costs? And why does your avoidance hurt him this much?
Point of View: 3rd Person
Word Count: 2181
Character: Sirius Black x Reader
House: Gryffindor
Year: Sixth Year
Two weeks. It had been two weeks since Sirius has talked to Y/n last, and it's driving him up the wall. The only other time where he doesn't talk to her for that long is during the summer, but at least they owl back and forth non-stop, and now suddenly he hasn't heard her sweet voice in two damn weeks.
And it's not as though he hasn't tried to talk to her. Hell, he's been going out of his way to run into her just to ask what was up with her, but every time she sees him, she runs away. And now she's changed the time of her daily activities (going to the library to read/study, walk in the courtyard, visit Hagrid, etc.) – not that he knew the times she was going by heart before she changed them – so now he can't even run into her then.
Two weeks. Two damn weeks. And he's not going any longer without her.
It was Saturday and the Marauders were all hanging out in their dormitory, and Sirius was itching to find Y/n and beg ask her to forgive him for whatever he must have done to have her ignore him like this.
"Remus," Sirius calls, breaking the silence.
"Hm?" Remus hums, not even bothering to look up from the book he was reading, which only caused Sirius to grow more frustrated.
He closes his eyes before he snaps at Remus, taking a deep breath to calm himself. The only thing that does is cause his eyes to well up with tears. 
Godric, what was up with him? Was Y/n really causing him to get this upset?
When he speaks next, his voice breaks, which causes all the other Marauders to lift their heads and look at Sirius with concern.
"Why won't Y/n talk to me?"
The other three Marauders share a few glances at one another before looking back at Sirius. The pity in their eyes as they look at him causes Sirius to grow frustrated once again.
His eyes, which were previously filled with tears, harden as he wipes them away. His lips pull back into a thin line as he glares down at his own hands.
"She keeps avoiding me! I haven't said anything to her in weeks!" he cries angrily. "And even when I do say something to her, she just ignores me and runs off! Did I do something to make her mad at me?"
"I'm sure you didn't do anything, Padfoot," James tries to comfort him. "Maybe Y/n just needs space for a while."
"Space from what?" Sirius snaps. "What did I do that would've wanted her to space herself from me? And only me! I haven't seen her ignoring you three, or anyone else for that matter! What did I do!?"
“Pads –” Remus starts, but is quickly interrupted.
“Why do you care so much anyway?” James asks. “It’s just Y/n.”
Sirius, Remus, and Peter all shoot James a glare, all three of them knowing that was not the right thing to ask.
“Yeah, Y/n, my friend,” Sirius sneers. “I care because Y/n is one of my closest friends and now suddenly she’s ignoring me! Do you have any idea how much that hurts? Because it does, a lot.”
“We know, Padfoot,” Peter replies, trying to make his voice sound comforting, although to Sirius it sounded more like pity. “I think James was trying to ask why you’re so … no quiet over dramatic about it … but more upset than you normally would be about something like this.”
“Yeah,” James agrees. “That’s exactly what I was trying to ask, thank you, Pete.”
Sirius glares at the both of them, his teeth gritting together as he tries to hold back from snapping at the two of them.
Why was he upset? Really? One of his best friends just straight up ditched him! Of course he was fucking upset!
“How do you twats not understand that I am upset my friend has fucking abandoned me!” Sirius snarls, his voice wavering as he tries to control his anger.
The others share another, worried glance, which drives Sirius even more insane.
Of course, Remus, James, and Peter quickly caught on that Y/n was avoiding Sirius, and were even quicker to catch on why. It wasn’t that hard to see that Y/n had finally had enough of her silly little crush on Sirius and was trying to stomp it out by avoiding him. And of course, Moony, Prongs, and Wormtail knew that avoiding Sirius at all costs wasn’t going to get rid of Y/n’s feelings for Sirius. And of course, Lupin, Potter, and Pettigrew knew that Sirius’s own feelings towards Y/n were developing beyond friendship.
“I can talk to her if you want me to,” Remus offers.
The usual stormy grey of Sirius’s eyes had darkened considerably in anger, his eyes narrowing at Remus in a glare.
“You’ve done quite a lot of talking to her,” he hisses. “A lot more than I have in Merlin knows how long. Do you know how frustrating that is, Remus? To see that Y/n, who suddenly hates me, is still all buddy-buddy with the three of you? Do you know how shitty it makes me feel when I see her talking to you and then she immediately runs away whenever she sees me? Do you?”
“No,” Remus replies, his voice squeaky at the anger in Sirius’s tone.
"That's what I thought," Sirius snarls, standing up from his bed abruptly.
With quick strides Sirius finds himself at the dormitory door, the door opened an inch before Peter asks curiously, "Where are you going?"
"To fucking find her!" Sirius snaps, turning around and facing his friends. "I can't keep going like this, without her. I - I need her, okay? I need her because ... because I love her. I love her. Holy shit, I love Y/n. I'll be back guys, but I need to find Y/n, even if that means searching every nook and cranny of this godforsaken castle."
He's out the door in another split second, the door slamming closed behind him.
Silence settles over the other three as they share glances, confused evident on each of their faces.
"Well," Remus finally mutters, breaking the silence. "He handled that a lot better than Y/n did when she realized she was in love with Sirius."
–––––––––––
To Sirius's surprise it didn't take him that long to find her. She was sitting in the courtyard, leaning against the truck of a tree with a book on her lap.
Sirius was careful to approach her quietly, not wanting her to spot him and jump up and run away (like she had been doing for two weeks straight).
When Y/n finally looked up from her book, the first thing she saw was Sirius looming in front of her. Her eyes widened as they made eye contact, scrambling to pick up her book and getting to her feet.
"Y/n, wait," Sirius snaps, grabbing onto her wrist with a vice-like grip before she could run away. "Please, don't run again, please."
Y/n sighs, trying to tug her wrist out of Sirius’s grip before she turns and faces him for the first time since the Quidditch game. Her struggling ceases as she sees the pain behind Sirius’s eyes, the pain that she would’ve caused every single time she ignored him or ran away.
“Please, Y/n/n,” he begs in a whisper, pulling her closer to him. “Please, don’t leave me again. I miss you so much. And I am so, so sorry if I did something to hurt you, or did something that made you want to avoid me. I never meant to, I don’t think I have done anything, but if I did just say the word and I will hold myself responsible for it and I will do anything I can to get back in your good graces because I miss you. So, so much. I hate that I haven’t seen you in two weeks, I hate that I haven’t talked to you in two weeks, I hate that I haven’t heard your voice in two weeks, and I hate that you’ve been avoiding me. I’m not blaming you because obviously it must have been something I did, but please Y/n, please, please, please stop avoiding me. I miss you.”
A wave of guilt washes over Y/n as she listens to Sirius, watching tears well in his eyes as it gets increasingly harder for him to talk without choking on his words. However, she can't help the little flutter her heart gives at his words.
Sirius takes a breath, trying to collect himself as he finally says everything he was feeling.
"And-and I hate how much it hurts that you've been doing this. I shouldn't care, I really shouldn't, but I do. I care so goddamn much, Y/n. It's been two weeks, two fucking weeks! I shouldn't be this effected, but I am. I've missed you more in two weeks more than I've missed anything else in my life, more than I miss the Marauders during the holidays, more than I miss Hogwarts during the summer, more than I miss the heat of the summer during the winter, more than I miss the sun in a rainstorm. I missed you, Y/n, and it's only been two weeks. So please, please, please, please, tell me what I did wrong so I can right it and we can go back to how we were before whatever I did."
A pause, a heartbeat before Sirius adds in a trembling voice, "Please."
Y/n takes a shaky breath, trying to stop the heat from rising in her cheeks and giving her away.
"Sirius," she says slowly.
"Please," he interrupts her, his voice breaking. "Please, Y/n. I don't know what I did, but whatever it must have been, I am so sorry. Please, please, please forgive me."
"Sirius," Y/n repeats, "you didn't do anything. I just... I realized something and I shut myself away from you. If anything, I should be saying sorry to you. I never meant to hurt you like this."
Sirius stares at her, confusion bubbling up within him as he listens to her explain.
"I-I don't understand," he admits in a quiet voice. Her stares up at her helplessly. "Why would you avoid me like you have if I didn't do anything? You haven't avoided the others, just me."
Y/n sighs, her heart thudding in her chest as she looks away from Sirius and finally admits in a small voice, "I'm in love with you."
The world stops, for the both of them.
Y/n can't breathe, why would she admit that!? Everything, everything, has been ruined. She ruined their friendship! Why would she do that!?
Sirius can't breathe, did she mean it!? Everything, everything, is going to change, for the better. She felt the same! But why did she avoid him if she loved him?
After what felt like hours of silence, Sirius responds, "I love you, too."
Sirius's heart pounds against his ribcage. Even though she said it first, it's still so hard to admit it.
Y/n's heart pounds against her ribcage. There is no way in hell that he actually feels the same.
"I – w-what?” she stutters, mouth dry.
“I love you too,” Sirius repeats, dropping her wrist. His hands come up to cup her jaw, holding her face in his hands as he smiles down at her. “I-I was thinking about how much I missed you, everything about you – not just your presence – and I guess that led me to realize that I would never feel this way about someone I thought of as my friend. Y/n/n, I realized that I’m in love with you.”
Y/n mirrors Sirius’s smile, relief flooding through her body as her cheeks flush with pink.
“I-I’m glad,” she whispers. “I was scared that you didn’t feel the same; that’s why I started avoiding you. I thought that if I was around you less my feelings would go away, which obviously didn’t work. But I was scared to say something in case I made things awkward between us.”
Sirius chuckles, pressing his forehead against hers, asking in a soft voice, “How could I not be in love with you? You, Y/n L/n, are the most kind, thoughtful, caring, smart, funny, beautiful woman in the whole world; I don’t know how I didn’t realize my feelings for you sooner. I love you.”
“I love you too, Sirius,” Y/n murmurs back. She closes her eyes, relishing in the feeling of Sirius being this close to her.
A comfortable silence fell over the two as they soak in each other’s presence, two hearts beating as one.
Two minutes. It has been two minutes since Sirius has admitted his feelings for Y/n, and it’s making him feel like he’s on top of the world.
Taglist: @littleshadow17 (who asked for a part 2 a month ago. I hope it was up to your standards lol). And @rosieandthethorns (who didn't asked to be tagged but I figured I should let you know so you can stop foaming at the mouth and writhing on the floor lmao)
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