#i have no idea why ive been feeling the way ive been feeling and why why i have been struggling w some things | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

oli-ribbun-ver · 11 hours ago

Text

EP 4 RAMBLE PART 3 FINAL!!

(ft the other episodes! but mainly ep 4!)

okay actually i think this is more of a gangle ramble now but thats fine

part 1

part 2

CONTINUATION OF THE GANGLE PEOPLE-PLEASER PART OF THE RAMBLE FROM PART 2!

lets see... where did i leave off... RIGHT!!

There are a lot of parts in ALL episodes where she doesn't want to cause problems for people. Which is typically normal for everyone, HOWEVER. Her idea of 'causing problems' is her opening up to people about how she truly feels, or even voicing her feelings in general if they're about someone.

I've already gone over the Pomni conversation and the bit where she has a mini breakdown, and I said I'd include even more of the other episodes in this, so! Let's begin at Ep 1!

Let's talk about what I've observed in episode one.

YES THIS IS IMPORTANT.

Notice how it's emphasized she says it quietly? (I know it's for comedic effect, but EVERYTHING seems to be important for every character, like how the darkness from the bucket on Kinger's head in Ep 2 helped him remember something about Ragatha before immediately forgetting it and then the reason he only remembers things in the darkness is explained! Seems like a minor detail that means nothing, turns out to be HUGE.

She doesn't want to cause a problem. In this case, the 'problem' would be her fully interrupting the conversation because she's worried about her friend. In the mind of a people pleaser, even if it helps someone out, you feel a sense of pressure on you when mentioning someone needs help to others, because "What if I cause a problem or make them mad? I don't wanna do that!", those thoughts are pretty normal, ESPECIALLY for people-pleasers.

"Wait, what about Zooble?" Is said so quietly, you can barely hear it. She either doesn't want her voice to be heard, or she DOES but is too scared to say it more loudly because of some version of the thoughts I described.

not as important but I'd like to note how she literally says NOTHING. like. nothing. i just think its kinda funny but also she just. doesnt give her opinion at all? she wasnt even asked if she wanted to go with them to check on kaufmo they just dgaf about her 😭

ANYWAY

This is the only time she gives her opinion and its not even an opinion HELP

Also I'm trying to save space so I don't have to make a part 4 so shortly into this, since I know I'll have to make one anyway, but I wanna mention how she hides behind her broken mask to protect herself after he screams which kinda hits different now that we know more about her mask.

But anyway, I'll make a seperate little portion of this ramble for that!

I'd like to mention too, anytime she is shoved, has something mean said to her, or has her comedy mask broken, she doesn't complain or say anything about it except for maybe an "ow". I find that interesting, because I think the reason for this is that she doesn't want anyone worrying about her. AKA, she doesn't want to cause a 'problem'.

She wants to please. One does not please by being a 'problem', right? That's probably how she thinks, anyway.

When Jax tells her to do something she doesn't want to do, whether he pressured her like that or not, it wouldn't have made a difference, because she can't bring herself to say 'no.'

In my opinion, from what it sounds like when she says "I don't think we—" she probably would've ended up saying yes regardless. Hell, if he'd just followed it up with "do it," I don't see a world in which she wouldn't, although she'd probably be more hesitant.

also why does his back bend like that he looks like hes gonna become an old man any second now HELP 😭

Also, when Jax threatens her by saying "Do it, or I'll tell Ragatha about the figurine thing," I think that really does something to her.

Every time she's either built up the confidence to say no, or someone has tried to help her say no, she's kicked down in one way or another INSTANTLY.

Episode 4 did not help with that. I believe in the next few episodes, she will not be better about saying no. She might even be worse off, knowing Ragatha thinks her being happy is annoying.

People-pleasers are in different worlds. Being the type of people-pleaser Gangle is, it's an entirely different world from others. It carries a lot of what I can only describe as delusion to it.

If Pomni had not stepped up when Gangle thought she was alone after work hours, Gangle would have abstracted. I am a firm believer in that. She was breaking. Losing her mind.

Gangle tells herself to stop trying to achieve her dream while breaking down over the fact her efforts to achieve her dream might not be enough.

So let's go there, and get a

Closer look at Gangle's mental state.

(and why she's most likely the least unwell character)

Gangle is mentally ill. Everyone knows that already, but to what extent?

I'm not sure if we'll ever know.

But what we do know is this.

More likely than not, Gangle almost abstracted in Ep 4. And out of everyone who has EVER vented so far, Gangle has shared relatively nothing. Even after the Spudsy's adventure, what we've seen so far is her never mentioning her feelings except that she feels like she messed everything up.

Gangle doesn't know how to help herself. Zooble can make her feel better, but not for long, because Gangle doesn't think she can get better.

When she was about to vent to Pomni, she stopped as soon as she felt like her feelings were REALLY about to come loose, put her new happy mask back on, said she had no time to talk about her feelings, and fled.

What I think is that Gangle thinks everyone is more important than her, so when she FINALLY got to be important she was happy. Really, truly happy.

The worst thing you can do is make someone think they're not wanted or loved.

Something that makes me sad is that Gangle does not feel wanted or loved.

Gangle was almost gone in Episode 4.

We almost lost Gangle. Had Gangle abstracted, she'd die without ever feeling like people cared about her.

For all we know, she could be the first person to abstract after Kaufmo.

I personally believe that.

The end of Episode 4 was a su¡cide attempt. (is that word allowed? im not sure..l ill censor it anyway)

I saw someone say this in the comment section of either the episode itself or a reaction video, and I completely agree.

They say before people commit su¡cide, they have a sudden boost of joy. Everything will be over soon. Why not enjoy that fact?

I think it was a subconscious su¡cide, at the very least.

She was happy. For the first time without a happy mask to hide how she feels deep down, she was happy.

She had a sudden boost of happiness, and then stepped backwards into oncoming traffic. When someone experiences a near-death situation by their own hand, there's a moment of regret before they are gone. I've experienced it myself, and it is horrid. That feeling is one I will never be able to forget. Even if I never so much as blacked out, I felt faint, and I will NEVER forget that fear, that horror, dread, regret.

The shock. Wondering if it was truly me who did it.

And I think. That is what Gangle experienced.

And then, that feeling was brushed off by Caine, whether she knew he doesn't understand the feeling of wanting to disappear or not, she was quick to blame herself for it all. Both about her performance to Caine, and alone, to nobody but herself.

"I guess I just... cracked under the pressure I suppose."

And maybe, just maybe.

That crack will never heal.

Thank you for listening and reading my ramble, everyone!! I appreciate it more than you know!

Bye bye for now, friends! Have a lovely day!

23 notes · View notes

iminyourwallsbabe · 14 hours ago

Text

Arcane characters as different types of kpop enjoyers

Not stans, you'll see later.

Jinx- Hardcore noise music girlie. The more obnoxious the better. If the beat makes you audibly go "what the fuck is going on", she's eating that up. That's groups like Stray Kids, Ateez, NCT (don't ask which one, the answer is all of them), etc. She also likes G-Idle because Isha fucking loved Queencard and Wife and has since put those songs on Sevika's arm, much to her annoyance. It's grown on her though, since Isha quit being a trainee at Breathing entertainment (GET IT BECAUSE SHE'S-)

Vi- I don't think she'd like any particular group, if she comes across some kpop and it sounds good to her then it's whatever. She's shown some consistent interest in BTS' earlier music (so from like 2 Kool 4 Skool to The Most Beautiful Moment in Life). She doesn't understand the obsession some people have with it but she respects it to some extent. However some people think she's a huge kpop stan because she keeps going out to buy albums for Jinx. She used to just steal them but then she decided to date a COP and now she has to "obey the law" or whatever. Kinda cringe.

Caitlyn- Christian horse girl music. For the uninitiated, this is an unofficial sub genre of kpop. It's literally just the most squeaky clean, probably heard it in a kdrama type songs. So GFriend, Berry Good, Lovelyz, a little bit of Loona, April, Apink, WJSN. No this is not all she's ever been allowed to listen to, she acquired this taste herself. She's a basic bitch at heart and we love her for that ♥️

Jayce- Caitlyn may be basic, but this man is BASIC basic. knows two BTS songs and it's Dynamite and Butter. But good news! He's not completely out of the loop. He knows about the Butter remix with Megan Thee Stallion. He also liked Neva Play by Megan Thee Stallion, RM just happens to be on that song. And he listened to the Mamushi remix featuring Twice. Mamushi, by Megan Thee Stallion. Are we seeing a trend here, perchance? Anyway, besides that, remember when Jungkook was popping off in the states for his solo stuff back in 2023? He was into that too. In fact he still consistently listens to the Golden album. At some point he wanted to get into New Jeans but then he googled how old they were and said FFFFFFUCK NO. (Go ahead, look up how old they were when they debuted. Also, on that note, FUCK HYBE, WE'RE BOYCOTTING THEIR ASSES- or at least we were supposed to for the past year because they can't help but hire Zionist weirdos but people didn't get the memo till they fully fucked over New Jeans so)

Anyway, on with the post!

Viktor- He is all the way a Red Velvet stan. Their music is just calm enough to where he doesn't find it distracting and just hype enough for him not to find it boring. He's the type of guy who puts on music to hear it, not to forget it's playing. He usually keeps songs like Bad Boy, Feel My Rhythm, and Psycho in rotation. That's really all the kpop he listens to but he loves Aespa's aesthetics and lore. Does he understand what's going on? Vaguely. He doesn't have the time to do a deep dive but he knows enough to think it's cool. Jayce does too, mostly because of Viktor.

Heimerdinger- He's a Once, next question.

Mel- I'm not too sure how to categorize this, all I'm gonna say is that her taste matches her tax bracket. She's listening to Kiss of Life, IVE, Le Sserafim, Mamamoo, Chungha, and she's fully caught up on the scandals. She could tell you who Hyuna's married to and why that's a problem, she knows who shat on the floor at that one award show, why Jimin and Jeongyeon had beef, she can explain kpop pipelines you didn't know existed. Jayce will listen to all of this very intently even though he has no idea who the fuck these people are. Like at all. He's lost. She knows he doesn't really understand but she appreciates that he gives her the time of day. She's also the type of person to decorate her photocards, all the decorations are gold.

Ekko- He likes a lot of the same groups Jinx does but in a different way. The way she likes their insane, loud songs, he likes the ones that are a little more chill. But sometimes when he misses her, he'll play the songs she likes. So, that being said, it's entirely possible that he cried his eyes out to fucking Sticker by NCT 127 (I think? Idk I be forgetting). Like from the other room you'd hear some weird ass recorder noises and violent sobbing. Besides that, he also enjoys really obscure groups. He's the nugu king. Some of the artists on his Spotify wrapped have like 10,000 streams combined. Where did he find this? Nobody knows. He also likes K/DA and his bias is Akali. That makes more sense when you remember True Damage exists

#arcane #arcane spoilers #kpop #bts #nct #megan thee stallion #please laugh #timebomb #ekko arcane #jinx arcane #mel arcane #arcane jayce #viktor arcane #sevika arcane #isha arcane #girl group #boy group #christian horse girl music #true damage

23 notes · View notes

mc-tummy-blur · 3 months ago

Text

I’ve been so busy with other stuff but I really want to get back to drawing WHF art so I went and cleaned up a wip. Not sure how I feel with some of the angles but I just needed to get this out of my system

Based off of this clip

Click for better quality

Check my pinned post to see links on how you can help the people in Palestine

#mcart #we happy few #whf #uncle jack #jack worthing #whf uncle jack #nick lightbearer #norbert pickles #whf nick lightbearer #is this lightfog?#yeah it is ngl so #lightfog #listen any ship art I make usually nine times out of ten it’s nothing romantic it’s usually shitposts like this #but the subtext is there #and this is toxic yaoi anyway ain’t no way they’d have a proper romantic relationship #their dynamic compels me though #it would work more in his foggy jack form but also I think it would be funny if this is how jack acts to him in his uncle jack form #just slightly unhinged #anyway uhhh if you’re still reading the tags uhh mayhaps you’d like to send me a request for a whf art idea?#gonna be honest I only have so many ideas I want to do but I feel like I need to be motivated so #it would be so awesome. it would be so cool #read my pinned post though and take into consideration for that cause there’s just some things I won’t do so I may end up rejecting an idea #would like to draw something with uncle jack cause like lately ive been trying to draw him but been having the hardest time idk why #he just looks off in my artstyle rn so maybe if i get a request id be able to lock in #anyway uhhh thats it

84 notes · View notes

sidesteppostinghours · 3 months ago

Text

ok. question.

ortega ended up hallucinating sidestep after they "died", but sidestep doesnt know about that. they know it got bad, but never the full extent of how their death affected them. so if your sidestep Did learn, if they found out ortega looked for them in every little piece they could, would that change anything for your sidesteps? would their relationship with ortega be any different?

#pulp speaks #Am i thinking of my “ortega sees sidestep posthb” fic again? perhaps #shameless plug btw yall should read it its called 'seen' on ao3 and i still like it #but anyway the important bits: ive been thinking about it with my sidesteps and its really interesting to me how different they are #but theyre all some variation of “i didnt know you /cared/”#caine is. uncomfortable with the idea #i genuinely dont know why but i do know that in the end their feelings on the matter are “whats done is done and im back now” with a small #“ill try not to leave again” mixed in #meanwhile cyrus is a deer in headlights over it #itd be way worse if he learned it when they met again- i feel like if he learned ortega was still that attached he wouldve left and never-#-come back. he would still want to Now but hes too tangled in his relationships and ortega is his /friend/ and leaving would just explode i #-his face‚ god Damnit ortega you son of a bitch‚ he shouldve just run. you werent supposed to drag him into caring about people again.#cecilia would have mixed feelings about it. i think shed resonate with it a lot for reasons she doesnt want to face #but it would also hit her like a goddamn Truck that he chose to move on/replace her rather than try get her back and its easier to get mad-#-about that than question her own feelings. but also maybe she could use this to her advantage? maybe this time he knows theres always a-#-chance hell come back for her next time. maybe. shes hoping there wont be a next time.#cynthias an interesting case because shes in love with ortega. deeply. but ortega /never came for her/ when she /promised/ and cynthia-#-is still furious about it #ortega hallucinated her in death but she couldnt put the pieces together and go looking herself? she cared enough to look for her but-#-not enough to save her?#she would still end up settling on bitterness for abandoning her but the information would shake her to her core #anyway. i think ortega should be used as a squeaky toy 👍#caine lynzal #cyrus becker #cecilia rider #cynthia garcia #ortega #sidestep #fhr

56 notes · View notes

deoidesign · 5 months ago

Note

Hello! I just discovered your blog and I immediately became captivated by your webcomic, but I'm unsure where to read all of it. I know it's on Webtoons, but I can see it hasn't been updated for a while, and you still post about it.

Are your physical novels just prints of the webcomic? Are they a continuation? Is the story complete? Thanks in advance!

Hi there!

Glad you found me and are enjoying my comic!

It's only on webtoons, and the story is not complete yet! We're 2/3 of the way through right now. It's currently on hiatus, and it's scheduled to come back in about 2 months!

I'll explain why it's been so long if you're curious, but also for my followers who might also be wondering about it under the cut. Sorry, it's pretty much just me complaining haha

I took a month off I took 2 months to get the books printed I took a month to prepare my next comic and I took 2 months to write the rest of the series (I knew the character arcs I wanted, but not the time periods or mysteries!!!) I've been working on actual episodes since then

I had to take some time off because of some pretty extreme burnout due to the sheer amount of work it was to draw over 800 pages and write 6 complete stories in a year and a half... I was getting sick almost weekly due to the overwork, it was really really bad honestly. I was having to work 60+ hours every week just to keep up...

The nature of the comic itself is also difficult... Each of the arcs is a complete, self contained story which can be read (ideally) without context, and my arcs need to be about 10-13 episodes each... And since I have an exact number of episodes to work with, it's even harder.

It takes a ton of planning and a ton of refinement, and working week to week with no breaks I was forced to put out second or even first drafts, so I just wasn't happy with the work I was doing... And to do that for the rest of the series? I wouldn't be proud of the work I did.

Plus... To be entirely honest, webtoon has treated me quite badly IN MY OPINION... They deprioritized me before I launched (I had to beg for more promotion, I'm not exaggerating), they outright denied me the opportunity to even ask for a raise, I don't make any money on fast pass and they pay me less than my partner makes working at trader joes. My first editor left me completely hanging, my second editor (who I loved) was fired... And they told me I wouldn't get a third season before my first season even finished. So it was just repeatedly completely demoralizing.

I'm sorry it has taken so long, it'll have been 10 months by the time I come back. But I realized... I won't get promotion either way. I won't get more episodes either way. I won't get more money either way. So to finish everything, to make it feel good, to make it something I'm proud of, I chose to take longer to make it better.

I am fully aware I will lose a significant amount of my readership for this and it might genuinely affect my career moving forward. But it's what I had to do! So I'm sticking to my guns on it, and I'm confident long term it'll be worth it. It never could have been this good if I didn't take this much time.

#asks #steakandpeanutbuttersandwiches #I'm SO sorry youre new and you asked me such a benign question and I responded with... this... LMAO #I swear to god I tried to make it as short as possible #theres just a lot auauuaghkhgjk #basically. way too much work. not enough money.#so it either is gonna be good and take longer or be worse but come back faster #and I chose to take longer #so.#I'm really sorry and I wish that this decision didn't also come with the... pretty much guarantee that it will negatively impact my career.#I will lose readers. I will lose potential readers for my future work. it looks bad on me as a creator to take such a big break. etc. etc.#but it's good. it's so good. you have to trust me it's like the best stuff Ive ever written #it. ok well to be honest #it'll probably feel extremely simple and extremely natural #but it's been SO much work LMAO #I am not exaggerating I have written over 200 pages of scapped ideas to get to where it is #I'm sure it won't make sense why it took so long while reading but you gotta trust me LMAO #ideally it doesnt even 'feel' different right. cause its gotta be cohesive with the whole thing #but there is SO MUCH TO WRAP UP #THERES SO MUCH #and to make that feel natural in this little space oh my GOD it is so hard #ok omfg I'm doing it again I'm going on way too long again IM SO SORRY #YOURE NEW HERE AND IM DOING THIS IMMEDIATELy #this is like 90% for my followers who I know are curious about this and I'm just using you as a jumping off point to talk about it #cause I don't really like to make standalone posts very often #I likely will make some kind of official announcement about it when the date is extremely set in stone #right now I think it's still only tentatively scheduled so it could still change #and I'll say something more... refined and restrained... then.#but for now this is like. actually everything. I think #I'm sure I forgot something but whatever lmfao

43 notes · View notes

pleasedontcareaboutme · 3 months ago

Text

It's missing my father hours rn so imma just dump a bunch of pictures here and cry

( sorry i don't know the source of anything I just had them on my phone)

(also dont read the tags i just need to let it out lol)

#I just realized I can call him dad easier than my real dad and now I understand why am I so damn attached to him #I always knew he was a parental figure for me #but now I connected the dots #How when u have an absent dad and a d34d mom a guy shows up in ur life #that tells u life advice that both of ur parents failed to do so #and makes u feel safe the first time in ur life #ofc ud become attached #i know for sure its unhealthy how much i love and miss him #he occupies most of my thoughts honestly #But how could i not cling to him so much when he was the only one who gave me hope in life #i try to keep going and even tho he is not here i keep telling myself whatever he taught me. i keep reminding myself he wants us to live an #bloom and be free #and that's what ill try to do #but you know somedays i wish i could just disappear and be wrapped in eternal happiness #its so fucking hard to pull yourself out of the slump man im so fucking tired im so so tired #somedays i wish id have the courage to off myself but i know that deep down i want to live and ive always wanted to live but i have no idea #how to live. i feel like i finally found a purpose and someone i love. but at the same time im always doubting myself and im scared of losi #g this little hope again and i know i should cherish and use it instead but each day i have this anxiety because rn i have nothing else if #lose this i seriously will lose everything atp. but ill still try bc rn its this or death so i should try im just damn tired yes anyways #sorry for being depressing some days just dont work out but thats okay #yes at the same time i want to get out of my head and try to find some friends but i cant deny that im highkey fucked up and i just cant le #go of my past and i still feel like that helpless unloved kid and idk how to form relationships this way. i dont trust myself at all so idk #how to trust others. and i feel like in order to find ppl that would love me i have to overshare abt my whole lifestory bc it still dictate #my life heavily. and since i met this band its better cuz im learning to deal w it and i want to heal from everything but yes at the same t #me who would wqnt to be friends w. someone that has like a year of life experience and 18 years of depression lol #so yes its complicated. bc i have friends but im like the funny friend. the one that is as shallow as puddle and has no problems but honest #y im genuinely sufferint qnd have been sufferinz all my life so i want to come out of my funny friend role. but that wojld mean i have to t #ll the shit i went through to all my friends but tbh it would be so random so ye. i do have a plan though. how it could work. But yes im ti #ed have been tired for 7 years now. But this time around i hope i can successfully get out of this torture cycle lol.#ok sorry this is what happens after puberty guys i could beva research case for a damn mental institute atp xdd

26 notes · View notes

unopenablebox · 9 months ago

Text

i admit that i find it a little bit frustrating how Wildly Astonished other antizionist jews act when i tell them my israeli jewish family have lived in the region since [some unknown length of time before 1800 when there start being records about it]

#and then they're like ''ohhh they're mizrahi!'' [connotation nonwhite‚ virtuously indigenous]#and i have to be like. no. it's just that‚ as palestine was in fact ottoman-administered greater syria for most of the last 600 years‚#you could get there from other parts of the ottoman empire. such as the part of now-ukraine your ashkenazi family is also from.#it wasn't actually a hermetically sealed arab-only ethnostate that evaporated immigrants on sight. it was a pretty decent place to live as #a jew by at least some accounts. or better than the front of the hapsburg-ottoman war anyway which is where they were coming from.#i'm not sure who you think it's serving exactly to believe that there were literally no ashkenazim in the middle east before the 1st aliyah #however there were some. and this information does not actually threaten a modern anti-state of israel position like at all.#but since apparently you've constructed your new Diaspora-Centric Identity around the idea that 'palestine' and 'diaspora'#are the two mutually exclusive nonoverlapping regions and the former is ontologically a no-european-jews-allowed zone #i guess i can give you a minute to try to figure it out.#ugh sorry this is nothing it isn't anything. for one thing it's fantastically unimportant #and for another thing i don't know how to like talk about it in a way that doesn't make me sound at least kind of like im trying to justify #myself as being somehow less complicit or something. i mean i think my complicity as an american dwarfs the rest of it honestly but.#i just feel really insanely alienated where the rhetoric of my theoretically most closely politically aligned group is not really built to #like. accommodate the facts of my family history.#sorry. i have honestly no idea why im so obsessed with articulating this concept ive just been chewing on it pointlessly for days #box opener

65 notes · View notes

localchocobomerc · 4 months ago

Text

I tried telling someone about this yesterday and they felt it was very bleak, but it doesn't feel that way to me:

I really like what final fantasy 7 has to say about failure! I read it as showing how much defining something as just a failure and assigning blame exclusively to the fail-er depends on removing it from the stream of causation and isolating it from context...

For instance:

1. Zack's failure to get him and Cloud to safety after escaping the Nibelheim lab. This is an easy one, because who looks at what he did and calls it a failure? It's obviously incredible that he made it that far AND was able to protect Cloud enough. But his goal was for both of them to make it, and he couldn't do it. I don't think he felt like he failed overall (thank goodness), but another person might have. Which, in context, and looking at the effects of the attempt, is ridiculous.

2. Cloud's failure to keep an independent sense of self after Zack died (after being tortured for years, after being impaled, after losing his mother, Tifa, and his hometown, all in succession). Maybe the not-that-rare attitude of blaming him for this is a fault of the OG script, which I think makes it sound like more of a reasoned choice than it is, whether through translation error or through Cloud being the only one to really talk about it after he realizes that's what happened (and blaming himself for it). Regardless, it is a failure, in the sense that Cloud definitely wouldn't want to forget Zack, never mind construct a false self from pieces of his memory, but he did. Looking at all the causes of this, and the effects (including both vulnerability to external control but also the ability to be present with Tifa when they met again, and to continue to function as the situation demanded), it just starts to feel too simplistic to view it as a failure only.

The story is full of people trying to protect each other and themselves and not being able to, or not being able to in the way or to the extent they wanted, like failing to:

- Keep the sector 7 plate from falling

- Keep the Black Materia from Sephiroth

- Save Dyne

- Save Aerith

- Save Zack

- Stop Sephiroth from calling Meteor

But if you look at each of those things in context, they both have many causes besides "I wasn't enough" and more effects than just "the loss I couldn't prevent." And in most if not all cases, making the attempt achieved other good things, like saving Marlene or giving Zack the chance to see that it wasn't all for nothing... Things that really matter a lot. Ultimately, saving the rest of the planet besides Midgar is another one of these... a good thing grown in the rubble of failure.

I just feel like, as someone well acquainted with failure, this game is saying it's worth trying and continuing to try after you fail, and that's not bleak to me at all.

#i guess if you dont feel like failure is a given it might seem kind of bleak lol #but its not for people who havent faced big disappointments (in themselves) i think #or at least this facet of it isn't #and i would disallow those people from having opinions about Cloud if I could #well or at least from sharing them where i can hear them lol #ff7 #cloud strife #ffvii #final fantasy 7 #ive been chewing on this idea for a month and im not sure it's new ideas to anyone at this point #but im satisfied #all of this is why Cid going to space felt like such a big deal to me!!#i feel like theres no way to include that in the remake now which is a little sad #but im not mad about it. the OG is enough 🚀❤️#cid going to space... cloud re-committing to saving the planet after waking up.... there's a few moments of triumph like that and they HIT

24 notes · View notes

persy-r-bozo · 6 months ago

Text

#Reds such a unique and sad character to me #No matter what he does he is in a loop somehow. both actually and mentally.#He wants change - but he's afraid of it - But he NEEDS it - but its too scary.#He wants to be normal - But normal is boring - But its safe.#Too weird for people - too normal for freaks.#He Likes those two - But getting attached hurts. - But he truly does love them - But what if hes the issue? what is HE hurts them.#and thats why i think transport was such a big turning point. because he does hurt them #He tries his best and does what he thinks will be best.#him being alone so he issnt an “Issue”#And them being happy and healthy in a place where thier needs are met. and they dont have to be scared anymore.#but he fails and he hurts them.#His torture here is feeling helpless and whenever he tries it fails to the point he feels awful.#He has such complex and battling emotions they loop in his head over and over. too the point he cant do anything #thus making him a neutral character.#But neutral issnt a Good thing #Yes he doesnt hurt anything. But he doesnt help or comfort either #He is in a loop inside and out.#Hes drowning.#SIIIGHH sometimes it hurts understanding him /hj. (i know theres like a gigillion ways to interpret him lmao.}#im actuly kinda sad i havent seen anyone else have the idea of him being torn apart inside and anxious tho.#or that he sees himself as a big monster. maybe even due to him leaveing before (trying to help but failing again)#or that hes easy to manipulate. thus creating danger for the other two.#But im just yapping and making a comic based on my thoughts :]#(as ive been a lil mentally ill about string man lately.#dhmis #dhmis red guy #dhmis fanart #dhmis comic #dont hug me im scared

17 notes · View notes

scintillatingshortgirl19 · 1 year ago

Text

it's just that i reeeally don't think it would have been that hard to find a solution to the timeline problem that didn't involve condemning the main character to an eternity trapped in his own solitary personal hell

#loki #loki spoilers #loki tv series #ive only barely started thinking about possible solutions and i already have one idea #loki could've figured out how to take someone with him as he timeslipped #(no reason why that couldn't have been a possibility considering he can also do things like pause time)#and taken sylvie back to the end of time and had her convince herself not to kill he who remains #also probably would be smart to go further back in time #rather than try to convince her to change her mind at the height of her emotion and rage #that might have. helped a bit maybe #idk it just really feels like there were options here #and that's part of why this all feels so unsatisfying to me #one thing that makes a lot of tragedies satisfying is inevitability #knowing that for one reason or another #the tragic ending was inescapable #that wasn't the case here #it didn't have to be this way #loki series negativity #op

62 notes · View notes

solivagantingrebel · 2 months ago

Text

hey guys who wants another round of tmi

#ive been #this entire day has been a lot and i have no idea how to feel about it #i've never cried this much in an entire day and i can't stop myself from tearing up but it's not because of something sad or traumatic i'm #not used to being loved. or appreciated. or meant to feel like i belong anywhere. i've struggled with being excluded and ostracized and it #has been an uphill battle for a long time and deep down despite my many attempts to heal and get better i've always felt like something was #fundamentally wrong with me. it has been wrong with me from the start and whatever evidence to the contrary ive gotten was rationalised awa #by fluke or maybe people like me because of what i can provide and what i can do for them and not because of who i am and who i am will #always be tolerated or ignored at best and i genuinely was not expecting anyone but a few close friends to care about this and just. andjus #i think something in me is healing and it's still hard to accept but i can conceptualize it and any negative thought in my brain is being #countered by “hey why would you think that when people care about you” and i know it is obvious right. its something i should know but it #has always been so hard to believe that anyone would and the fact that it's hitting right now? i cant fucking stop crying #its almost fucking embarrassing im like this. im a grown ass adult. why the fuck am i still crying like this. i fucking hate trauma man #keeps making me feel like im that kid who was never loved in the ways that mattered. sorry im just #thankful. grateful. i feel like some parts of that gaping wound is stitching itself together and i cant stop crying and for once im not #crying because i'm being hurt. i'm just grateful to be here. genuinely fucking grateful that i'm alive #funny isnt it. how much love can save you if you let it #tmi #rant #embarrassed myself enough i think #sorry about that we'll go to our regularly scheduled ghoap program soon enough #i'll be okay

10 notes · View notes

sonknuxadow · 1 year ago

Text

sorry i dont really like the shadow is silvers dad theory/headcanon/whatever and part of the reason for it is that people keep presenting it as an actual thing that could be possible even though it makes no sense and all "evidence" people use to back it up is easily disputed

#''they both have white chest fur'' okay ? there are so many other characters who have small physical traits in common #doesnt mean they have to be related #''shadow and silver are lancelot and galahad in sonic and the black knight'' okay and .#im sure there might be SOME meaning to the character choices in the storybook games but i highly doubt their lives are 1 to 1 parallels #or that the character choices are meant to imply anything about the characters that we dont already know #plus amy was nimue and nobody tries to argue that shadow and amy are related because of that?#also im aware that a lot of dad shadow stuff takes place in the future when silver is a baby and shadow has still been alive for a long tim #(which. how would that even work wasnt shadow in stasis again in the future)#but sometimes i see people do it with like present day shadow being a father figure to the silver who time traveled there ?#thats like the horrible combination of people infantilizing silver in a way they dont do with other characters his age or younger #and people pretending shadow is an adult when he isnt . what #also i dont get why people insist that if shadow is silver's dad then the other parent MUST be someone from the existing cast #like . silver is not from a few decades into the future hes from 200 years into the future #none of the characters youre saying shadow is gonna get with are gonna be living that long im sorry to say #and why does silver HAVE to be the child of a couple in the existing cast why cant he just be some random guy #and im not saying every au idea has to perfectly align with canon #but a lot of the people who think shadow is silvers dad arent presenting it as a fun little baseless headcanon #theyre presenting it as an actual plausible theory . when it really isnt .#also ive noticed one of the most common pairings for silvers parents is sonic and shadow .#sorry but that is just not happening i feel so strongly about sonic never wanting to get married or have kids #i think shadow being an older brother figure to silver could be cute .#and the idea of a timeline where shadow doesnt die or get put into stasis or whatever the hell and is still around in silvers time #could be interesting . but im not really on board with the dad thing

58 notes · View notes

graff-aganda · 1 month ago

Note

No no ikr. The ENT fandom is so quiet around here. And honestly I'm just excited to see art of my favourite dudes, because we rarely get fanart around here, and when we do it's usually Trip or T'Pol solely. Malcolm gets left in the dust quite a lot so I'm happy you drew him as well - and so well done too!

Anyway, ramble over, lol.

OMG... Well I think I can see why a lot of fanart is of Trip and/or T'pol (those two seem like they're doing some heavy lifting for the show/are just a lot of people's faves. I've got a few half baked ideas in mind for them myself.) but the rest of the crew as a whole do deserve more love I think! :]