#i have a research problem

[toadlessgirl]

20 Names More Common in the Regency Era than any of the Bridgerton Girls' Names

Araminta

Asenath

Brittania

Cherry

Christmas

Cleopatra

Dorcas

Dove

Easter

Etheldred

Happy

Keren-happuch

Mehetabel

Peace

Petronella

Philadelphia

Seabright

Urania

Virtue

Zilpah

[yeoldenews]

I fell down a rabbit hole last night researching this girl and found some photographs of her that are just peak Weird Little Girl (affectionate) energy, so I'm sharing.

Gladys (sometimes spelled Gladyce) Ditmars was born October 16, 1903 in the Bronx.

Her father, Raymond L. Ditmars was, at the time, the assistant reptile curator at the Bronx Zoo, and would later be appointed curator of the entire zoo.

Raymond met his future wife, Clara, when she was visiting the zoo and witnessed Raymond break up a fight between two venomous snakes. She was so impressed she asked to meet him. They were married eight months later. The venue was decorated with snake skins and Clara wore a live gopher snake around her neck during the ceremony.

Gladys first made the papers at the age of two and a half in the article @yesterdaysprint posted, which was reprinted across the country, as well as appearing in newspapers as far away as Australia.

The photograph of Gladys above dates to the same time as the article, and I believe the snake she is holding is likely 'Indigo', a four-foot long black-snake the article mentions her rocking to sleep.

Gladys was fascinated by snakes from infancy, and loved both the live animals her father sometimes kept at home overnight before giving lectures, as well as the preserved specimens he kept in jars in his office.

Mr. Ditmars stated in the 1906 article that Gladys appeared to have "no inborn fear for any animal" and reported that she "claps her hands with glee" upon seeing bears fight in the zoo.

Mr. and Mrs. Ditmars, Gladys and her younger sister Beatrice (born in 1905) were never out of the news for long. Prior to his marriage Mr. Ditmars had briefly worked for the New York Times, and the close relationship he maintained with his former colleagues kept the Bronx Zoo, and with it the Ditmars family, as a convenient source whenever the Times required a public interest story on a slow news day.

Mrs. Ditmars and the girls often accompanied Mr. Ditmars on his trips to collect new specimens for the zoo.

At the age of 14 Gladys captured a 6-foot diamondback rattlesnake in an improvised trap of her own design.

In her early 20s Gladys once again made headlines for speeding her roadster through the streets of New York City in order to get a vial of antivenom on a departing train, saving the life a man who was bitten by a diamondback rattlesnake in upstate New York. Her adventure grew comparisons to the story of Balto which had occurred only a year previously. A picture of Gladys posing with the famed Balto statue in Central Park, at the time only a few months old, appeared in newspapers across the country.

Raymond Ditmars was also a pioneer in the development of using motion pictures to record the natural world. Over his career he produced dozens of nature documentaries and educational reels, many of which are now unfortunately lost films. Gladys appears to have been very active in assisting with these films and can be seen (and heard!) in a surviving 1931 film reel titled "Monkey Whoopee!" playing a newspaper reporter opposite her father.

Gladys appears to have never held any official salaried position at the zoo, but served as her father's unofficial assistant until his death in 1942. She was a near daily fixture at his office and worked developing film, organizing and typing his notes and letters, as well as accompanying him into the field - including an expedition to Trinidad which resulted in the first ever capture and display of live vampire bats.

After Raymond Ditmars death, Gladys assisted in the publication of his biography.

After a brief marriage in the 1930s to a talent agent, which resulted in him allegedly cheating with a radio singer and a $100,000 lawsuit, Gladys remained single for the rest of her life. She lived quietly with her mother and sister in Westchester County, dying in 1979 at the age of 75.

The Great Bend Weekly Tribune, Kansas, March 2, 1906

[kenapiece-main]

Can you believe I'm having to make this meme even after successfully finishing up taxes and applying to job

[notbrucewayne48]

"aphobia doesn't exist"

bitch literally not that long ago an aroace youtuber animator was insulted by almost half of its community for being it

[probablyanalienindisguise]

my favorite thing is explaining to people one of my favorite fictional characters is an entire fuckinh spaceship who is also in a love-hate relationship with another ai

[toadlessgirl]

#how do we know this is a bridesmaid dress#was it worn in that context at a wedding at some point? I'd love to see the background! (via @tattedpetticoats)

This dress was donated to the MET by heiress Agnes Miles Carpenter in 1941.

As Agnes was born in 1865, she would have been 30-31 in 1896, so it seems likely it may have been her dress and she explained the context she originally wore it in at the time of donation.

Also donated by Agnes the same year was this Worth wedding gown, also from 1896. (The bridesmaid dress is a Worth design, but was actually made by a local NYC department store.)

Agnes never married, so I'm unsure where she acquired the wedding gown. I suspected it may have been the wedding dress of her sister Edith, who was married in 1896, but Agnes isn't listed as a bridesmaid and the dresses don't really match the descriptions of the dresses at Edith's wedding I've found in newspaper accounts. I didn't find any additional context in the MET archives or accession records so idk where the wedding dress came from, or if it was originally worn alongside the bridesmaid dress.

Agnes was a globe trotter and an apparent fashionista (she donated several other dresses to the MET including gowns by Callot Soeurs and Fortuny, as well as a large collection of 18th century fans).

Edith was instrumental in the early foundation of the Girl Scouts, (apparently at one point inviting socialites over to her apartment to view her art collection and then locking the doors and refusing to let them leave until they agreed to join the board of directors) and several sources credit her as the origin of the idea for Girl Scout cookies.

Bridesmaid dress, House of Worth (French, 1858–1956), silk with pearl trim, 1896

[idontmindifuforgetme]

I think my life would be fixed if I fell asleep at a beautiful 8 pm and woke up at a beautiful 4 am bc it means I’m asleep when most people are awake and I’m awake when most people are asleep and honestly? Couldn’t ask for more

[kurthummeldeservesbetter]

tbh I don’t think therapy would have fixed Jayce and Viktor lmao. maybe would have softened their self-destructive tendencies but there’s no fixing that co-dependent relationship. Heimerdinger Mel and Sky are told “yeah, I can help treat their individual depressions but nothing is gonna reduce their co-dependency. I’m pretty sure separating them makes it a lot worse for not only them but much worse for everyone else. for everyone’s safety I suggest they’re not allowed to be more than a buildings length away from each other and even that is pushing it.” That therapist then quits on the spot cause now they’ve literally seen everything.

It’s like that scene in Brooklyn nine nine where all the physiatrists are observing and talking with Gina but instead it’s a whole crew of therapists and neurologists and physiologists trying to find out how these two men literally mind-melded together. They go to couples therapy but it’s literally just individual therapy held together because why tf not it’s the only way to get them to go.

[multi-fandomdisaster]

Hear me out: A game of Call of Cthulhu, but it takes place in Hatchetfield and the eldritch horrors that you're dealing with are the Lords in Black

[jinxedshapeshifter]

Why Kristoph Gavin Is Like That: An Essay

Alright so common sentiments I've seen regarding Kristoph are "Why is he like that" and "I want to study him in a lab" and I am a psychology nerd, so I decided to analyze Kristoph. Obligatory disclaimer: I am not a psychologist. Wanting to analyze Kristoph's behavior may or may not have gotten me interested in criminal and forensic psychology but I am not a psychologist. I am simply a guy who likes to psychoanalyze fictional characters from the most clinical perspective I can get to without actually being a psychologist. So let's begin.

Part 1: Diagnosing Kristoph Gavin

The thing about Kristoph is I think to fundamentally understand him, you need to diagnose him. In fact, I haven't posted my analysis of Kristoph's black Psyche-Locks because of it. As I said, I'm not a psychologist, but I do enjoy looking through the DSM-5 every once in a while, so I'm going off of that.

When you first look at Kristoph's behavior, you would (understandably) say he's a narcissist. From a purely colloquial perspective, this is absolutely true. However, I also think he very likely has narcissistic personality disorder. To be completely clear, I don't think his behavior is inherently a result of this. I think his behavior is a result of realizing he has a problem (even if he doesn't realize it's narcissism, he does acknowledge that he's fucked up because the reason he gives for killing Zak is "I am an evil human being") and not bothering to get help for it. In fact I'd argue he embraces it. So let's go through the DSM-5's diagnostic criteria for NPD (I don't need to explain where most of these are applicable but I'm going to anyway).

Criterion 1: Has a grandiose sense of self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements) - While I don't personally think the examples provided by the DSM-5 are reflective of Kristoph's behavior (although I think an argument could be made about him exaggerating his achievements, depending on if you think he was forging evidence before the Gramarye trial, which I personally do but I'll get into that later) I absolutely think he has a grandiose sense of self-importance because he canonically has a god complex, which is implied to be why he became a defense attorney; by doing that, he made people depend on him and literally had people's lives in his hands.

Criterion 2: Is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love - I don't really know exactly how applicable this is, and it might've been more applicable when he was younger. However, he was so determined to get a win over Klavier in Klavier's first trial to forge evidence over it, so there's something to be said about him having a preoccupation with success not unlike Manfred I think.

Criterion 3: Believes that he or she is “special” and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people (or institutions) - He literally says this himself. He literally says the jury is made up of "ignorant swine" and says they're soiling the courts, I don't know what else to say on this point

Criterion 4: Requires excessive admiration - I will once again point you to the implication that he became a defense attorney specifically to make people dependent on him. The judge calls him the best defense attorney in town so I think it's safe to assume he's never lost a trial (which I will bring up again later). The nanosecond it's implied Apollo is turning on him and losing admiration for him, Kristoph takes it as a fucking betrayal, specifically saying "Et tu, Justice? You would betray me, your teacher?" Reminder, this is because Apollo decided to listen to Phoenix's testimony.

Criterion 5: Has a sense of entitlement (i.e., unreasonable expectations of especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her expectations) - Can I say his cell is evidence of this? No? Alright. He seems pretty fucking upset when he's reminded he's not the defense attorney in Phoenix's case. What does this imply? He acts like he's entitled to acting as the defense attorney during the case. This in comparison to the other defense attorneys who have acted as co-counsel at some point (Mia, Diego, Phoenix, Apollo, Kazuma, Athena) who let the acting defense attorney do their damn job. Like it might even be that no other lawyer acting as co-counsel has ever acted as entitled as Kristoph does that makes it feel like Kristoph comes off as entitled in the first place (in which case, I very much think Kristoph is meant to come off as entitled during Turnabout Trump).

Criterion 6: Is interpersonally exploitative (i.e., takes advantage of others to achieve his or her own ends) - I'm not explaining this. Phoenix's disbarment hinged on this, I refuse to explain this. I already made a post about it in regards to Apollo, I'm not explaining this here

Criterion 7: Lacks empathy: is unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others - I think in order to be as horrible as he is, he would have to lack empathy. Idk. Like he obviously lacks empathy but I don't know how to explain it.

Criterion 8: Is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of him or her - Literally his motive for everything. He got Phoenix disbarred because he was upset over Zak firing him.

Criterion 9: Shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes - I will once again direct you to him calling the jury "ignorant swine" in Turnabout Succession.

That is 8 out of 9 criteria he definitely meets and one that's debatable. You only need to meet five of the critera to be diagnosed. The only reason one is debatable is because we don't get into Kris's head. Conclusion: "Kristoph has NPD" isn't an unreasonable assumption. Kristoph having NPD is actually why I haven't posted the analysis on his Psyche-Locks; I didn't think I could explain Kristoph having NPD well in that post and having that explanation is crucial to understanding that analysis (which will be added to this one instead of it being its own post).

As I said at the start, I do not think Kristoph having NPD makes him a horrible person. I think he knows he has a problem, and instead of getting help for it, he embraces it. He chooses not to get help and that choice and him borderline embracing his narcissistic traits is what makes him a horrible person. This is yet another thing that makes Kristoph and Klavier so interesting; Klavier exhibited similar narcissistic tendencies at 17 (although not near as bad as Kristoph) but it feels like he recognized that he had a problem and got help for it. Narcissistic personality disorder can be caused by trauma, and it wouldn't surprise me if Kristoph and Klavier had very similar yet very different responses to whatever traumatic event they experienced. In Kris's case, this resulted in NPD that he didn't get help for and arguably embraces.

Part 2: Evidence Forgery & A Perfect Trial Record

The judge explicitly refers to Kristoph as "the best defense attorney in town" when he asks about Apollo's status as the acting attorney and Apollo refers to Kristoph as a "top-notch defense attorney" when he asks Phoenix why he wanted Apollo to be his attorney. In my opinion, both of these statements would imply that Kristoph has never lost a trial. Even Phoenix has lost trials, and he basically had Kristoph's reputation before being disbarred (which has some super interesting implications actually). This is where Klavier comes into play.

For Kristoph to forge evidence to guarantee a win, he's either not as good a defense attorney as his reputation would have people believe, or he was confident Klavier had a chance to win the trial. If we really think about it, I think the first option, that Kristoph just isn't as good a defense attorney as people think, is more likely, and this also leads into the evidence forgery discussion. He had no qualms about spending $100k on forged evidence. This implies one of two things; either he's forged evidence before or he's von Karma levels of rich. I think it's much more likely that Kristoph forges evidence to make up for the fact that he's not actually as good a defense attorney as people think he is.

He's a year younger than Phoenix, so if we assume he became a defense attorney at the same age as Phoenix (24), he'd already been a defense attorney for two years at that point. Going a bit further, if we assume he became a defense attorney at the same age as Apollo (22) instead, then he'd been an attorney for four years by the time Zak's trial was happening (and he had been an attorney long enough by Zak's trial to be well known, as Klavier says "Ah, figures my bro's more famous in this part of town" when the judge asks if Klavier and Kristoph are related). There's plenty of room for him to forge evidence there, as long as the decisive evidence doesn't require replication of something that would be unique, like handwriting. He could (probably) easily forge a murder weapon or a bloodstain. This would explain why he's so willing to pay $100k for a forgery too. If we keep with the assumption that he forged evidence his entire career but never had to do anything with something like handwriting, he'd probably pay an arm and a leg to get the evidence he needs.

Considering Kristoph is also willing to murder people over a seven year old case, I wouldn't be surprised if he defended people he knew were guilty. Depending on the case, he would probably have to forge evidence at some point.

Part 3: Black Psyche-Locks

Kristoph having black Psyche-Locks when he's asked about why he killed Zak is interesting. It makes a lot more sense if you keep in mind that he is a narcissist. To fully explore Kris's Psyche-Locks, we need to go back to something Spark Brushel mentions in Turnabout Succession's MASON system section.

Spark says that Kristoph started stalking everyone who could conceivably be involved in Zak's case out of paranoia. In Kristoph's brain, this was probably completely justified. His paranoia was specifically rooted in the belief that Zak would appear to someone involved in the case and expose Kristoph's forgery. Kristoph stalked Spark, he stalked Phoenix, he stalked the Mishams, I wouldn't be surprised if he (attempted to) stalk Klavier. If the fact that he forged the evidence that got Phoenix Wright disbarred ever got out, his reputation would be tarnished beyond repair, and to him, his reputation is the most important thing he has. He was so careful about how he handled the forged diary page that nobody suspected anything was even wrong with it except Klavier. All of this adds context to his Psyche-Locks being black instead of red.

I think it's incredibly likely that whether through paranoia-fueled delusion or just not being able to consciously acknowledge that he did kill Zak (which, if revealed and then investigated, could absolutely expose all of Kristoph's wrongdoings, something I think he would've realized), he genuinely didn't realize he killed Zak. I 100% think it's possible that Kristoph genuinely thought he'd killed some random guy on impulse. "But Jinx," I hear you saying, "why would he have gone after Zak if he didn't realize who he is?" As I said, I think it's possible that Kris thought he killed a random guy on impulse. He didn't plan to kill Zak. If he had, he would've been more prepared for it. I think some part of his brain recognized Zak which is what gave him the impulse in the first place, but he didn't become consciously aware of it until Turnabout Succession. Alternatively, he got so far in denial that he managed to delude himself into genuinely thinking he hadn't killed Zak, and he had just killed some rando named Shadi Smith. Phoenix didn't even recognize Zak when he introduced himself as Shadi. If Phoenix, who played poker with and defended Zak and has a picture of him in his office, didn't recognize Zak immediately, why would Kristoph?

It's also not impossible that there are multiple other murders Kristoph's committed that we don't know about. Hell, he tried to poison the Mishams after Zak's trial. At the very least I don't think that was his first time attempting murder. Kristoph's not an idiot, he's just careless (which doesn't surprise me, considering he is so convinced that if he ties his loose ends he won't get caught that he doesn't even tie his loose ends all the way, nor watch what he says in regards to murders he committed). That's not to say he's some kind of mastermind either, but he is intelligent. I don't think he could pull Simeon Saint levels of bullshit but he's very much capable of successfully and skillfully manipulating people. My point here being, if he has murdered other people before he murdered Zak and after he attempted to poison the Mishams, he probably wouldn't be surprised about having the impulse to kill some random guy, making him more inclined to believe he did just kill some guy.

I also think it's worth it to compare how Athena's Psyche-Locks broke in Dual Destinies to Kristoph's behavior. Athena was able to be eased into her Psyche-Locks breaking. She didn't have any reason not to trust the things Phoenix was saying. Kristoph is so paranoid that he doesn't trust anyone. He wouldn't have been able to have his Psyche-Locks broken because he would just deny everything that's being said until he can't deny it anymore and breaks down, something at least directly related to his paranoia, if not also his NPD. This is why I mentioned in this post that breaking Kristoph's Psyche-Locks would always be a bad idea. He'd never get to a point where he'd be able to mentally handle the truth. Kris's trust issues run so deep that he'd never trust anything anyone's saying until the damage is already done and the Psyche-Locks are broken. In Kristoph's case, there's no way to break those fuckers without causing the damage Pearl mentioned as something that'll happen if they're broken when they're not ready to be. I wouldn't be surprised if this is why Kristoph's breakdown in Turnabout Succession is so intense.

Part 4: Kristoph's Personal Relationships

For this section, I'm going to discuss each of Kristoph's relationships separately, then go into what his relationships say about him in general. So let's start.

Kristoph & Klavier

Kristoph and Klavier's dynamic is genuinely one of the most interesting in the Ace Attorney series to me.

Klavier doesn't really talk about Kristoph much, and the same sorta seems to apply to Kristoph. We don't learn anything about Klavier and Kristoph's dynamic until Turnabout Succession, and we know Kristoph didn't talk about Klavier because Apollo didn't even know Kristoph has a brother. When we do see what their dynamic was like in 2019, it's Klavier being used by Kristoph. Kristoph used Klavier to get Phoenix disbarred, and it weighed on Klavier's mind for seven years.

I also think it's worth noting the following exchange from Turnabout Succession:

Klavier: Let's clean out the family closet, eh, Kristoph? Kristoph: You're spinning out of control. Calm yourself before you say something you'll regret. Klavier: Spinning out of whose control? Mine? …Or yours?

Which implies that Kristoph exhibited some kind of controlling behavior towards Klavier. It doesn't surprise me because Kristoph's a control freak. I'd also be more surprised if Klavier wasn't afraid of Kristoph killing him at some point. Additionally, something I mentioned in my Klavier analysis is that in the 2019 section of Turnabout Succession, Klavier does have a good view of Kristoph and even seems to look up to him. He takes Kristoph at his word that Phoenix is going to present forged evidence despite (by 24 year old Klavier's account) finding it weird even then, and keeps him anonymous when he brings up the fact that Phoenix presented forged evidence. Another thing I mentioned in the aforementioned Klavier analysis is that based on Klavier's behavior, he didn't realize Kristoph was manipulating him until sometime after the 2019 section of Turnabout Succession. Something made Klavier realize he was being manipulated. Could be age or that Kristoph did something that made Klavier realize Kristoph was a piece of shit, but no matter what it was, something happened that made Klavier's view of Kristoph shift.

Kristoph & Phoenix

Kristoph and Phoenix are also really interesting to me because Kristoph's end of their friendship is fueled by paranoia, and Phoenix's side is fueled by a desire to keep Kristoph close and basically investigate him. It's toxic on both their ends, and that makes it really interesting. Their dynamic also has a really good example of "Kristoph will lash out if someone even minutely slights him" in both Phoenix's trial and Vera's.

During Phoenix's trial, Kristoph gets so upset over the trial even slightly alluding to the potential for him being present to kill Shadi that the judge has to remind him that Phoenix is his client. Phoenix is also so determined to get Kristoph caught that he forges evidence (technically twice) and revamps the entire justice system (and this was exclusively to get Kristoph caught). They're both incredibly petty with each other. I'm not really sure what to add here, they're just so toxic they should come with a radiation warning.

Kristoph & Apollo

Apollo looks up to Kristoph. Kristoph uses this to his advantage during Phoenix's trial, using the fact that Apollo is loyal to and looks up to both Kristoph and Phoenix to emotionally manipulate him. He then probably tries to use "You would betray me, your teacher?" to further manipulate him, but Apollo's desire to find the truth overrides his loyalty to Kristoph (something Apollo literally tells Kristoph).

Kristoph has one final instance of trying to emotionally manipulate Apollo; he gets Klavier to the point where he essentially shuts down then blames Klavier shutting down on Apollo. This doesn't work of course, and Apollo bulldozes on through anyway.

In general I think we can come to a pretty solid conclusion that Kristoph will either manipulate and gaslight people to get what he wants or stalks them out of an intense paranoia that's directly related to how he sees himself as a result of the NPD he didn't get treatment for. Instead of coping with things like a normal fucking person, he resorts to both physical and psychological violence and stalking.

Part 5: Conclusion

So here we are. Almost 3k words later. I do not want the takeaway from this to be "Kristoph's a manipulative, violent asshole because he's a narcissist" and if that's your takeaway you need to rethink literally everything I said here. The fact that Kristoph could be diagnosed with NPD has nothing to do with him choosing violence. NPD has nothing to do with him choosing to stalk everyone involved with Zak's trial instead of getting help for his paranoia. I want that to be perfectly clear. The thing with NPD is it can be hard for the person suffering from it to realize they have it and subsequently get help for it. Kristoph's problem isn't exactly that he has NPD. It's that he never got help for the thinking patterns the NPD caused. Had he gotten help I don't think he would've ended up stalking and murdering people. He'd still have NPD, but he wouldn't be near as fucked up.

It's why Klavier and Kristoph are so interesting as characters. Klavier has narcissistic traits but he evidently got help for them, as he's nowhere near as egotistical at 24 as he was when he was 17, although he does start exhibiting those traits again under high stress situations. He's still not completely okay mentally (otherwise he wouldn't regress like that), but he's also better than Kristoph at managing his symptoms when they do show up. Kristoph doesn't even try to get help for his symptoms, which leads to his downfall. Had he gotten help for his narcissism, he might've ended up a bit more like Klavier.

I hope Ace Attorney's prison system has a proper therapy program. I hope Kristoph's able to get help when and if he decides he wants it, because I am personally of the belief that everyone deserves help if they want it, and Kristoph's no different. I don't think he deserves to have Phoenix, Apollo, or Klavier back in his life, and I wouldn't blame any of them for never talking to him again, but that doesn't mean I don't think Kristoph deserves help. He would just have to realize he has a problem first, which I doubt happened soon after Apollo Justice and I'd frankly be surprised if it ever happens. But I hope the offer for help is there if he decides he wants it.

So why is Kristoph Like That? Untreated mental health issues that he's implied to realize is a problem.

*Again, please do not act like I'm saying Kristoph having NPD is an excuse for his actions. He chose not to get help. He chose to stalk people. He chose to kill people. Him having NPD isn't an excuse for that. My goal here was simply to answer "Why is Kristoph Gavin like that?" Do not misconstrue my intentions here or what I'm saying. Kristoph's NPD isn't what drove him to do what he did. Him choosing to embrace symptoms that hurt people did.

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

🩵

[toadlessgirl]

This afternoon I found a really cute Dear Santa letter where a mom transcribed her four-year-old son's imaginary phone call to Santa - full of such important Christmas-related information as his mamma's name is "just mamma" and "All our bees are dead."

One six hour research rabbit hole later - and I just listened to a recording of the same little boy making a phone call 60 years later. This one was to Richard Nixon.

[lilithofpenandbook]

Do you think that Snape, after being yelled at by McGonagall for showing her attitude and somehow the fight escalating to their past when Snape was a child, and told that if he was actually traumatised by her actions, he'd be afraid of her, not rude to her, would lock himself in his room and cry, cry, cry, because despite the fact that he fought back and screamed that he IS traumatised, that she DID hurt him by not being there, that she IS responsible for him being this way, he isn't sure? Because every single person around him tells him that he's the problem. That he's rude. That it's his fault the other party was offended. Even though he didn't mean to be rude, he was just being him, but surely he's the problem if everyone's saying it? Or maybe he's surrounded by the wrong people? Or maybe he is wrong, and he is a horrible person, he is a piece of trash, he's wrong and just stubborn?

Do you think that sometimes he doesn't even know if he's right or wrong? That he doesn't even care, all he knows is that he's so, so angry, he's in so, SO much pain, he wants to scream, he wants to cry, it all hurts and no one's coming to make it better and he can never get it out, he can never truly vocalise it because the words won't come, and he looks hysterical, insane, and selfish.

He's just tired.

[inky-duchess]

WIP Hospital: Surgery

*Meredith Grey monologue voice* Writers really batter their characters and sometimes the damage is so great that they have to be seen to by the professionals and if you've really messed them up, they may need surgery.

Before Surgery

Before any surgery, the patient must be prepared for the procedure. They will be prepped by nurses and doctors but there are things every patient must go through before the surgery especially if they undergo general anesthesia.

No drink/food for a set period of time before the surgery.

Removal of necessary hair

Possible enema but not always necessary

Thoroughly bathed and cleansed, the patient should not use any makeup, nail varnish or perfume

Tests maybe run prior to surgery such as blood tests

All piercings, protesthetics

The preparation of advance directives such as DNRs and wills etc

What is in an OR?

OR or operating room is where operations take place - or would be if your character was having surgery at hospital (they aren't, are they?)

Surgical Lights: Surgeons have to see why they are doing so high powered lighting is used to illuminate the patient and cavity.

Operating Tables: Operating tables are where the patient lies while the surgeons are trying to save their life. also known as surgical tables, are essential to any operating room.

Surgical Displays: These are screens that magnify the cavity for the OR, sort of like tvs that allow everyone a view of what's going on.

Blanket Warmers: Or warming cabinets. These are where the IV fluids, linens, and blankets are kept.

Scrub Sinks: This is where the surgeons abd nurses and technicians get washed up, sterilised and gowned.

Vital Signs Monitor: This is a machine that tracks the patient's heart rate, oxygen saturation, breathing rate and blood pressure.

Ventilator: A ventilator helps the patient breathe while on anesthesia.

Anesthesia Machine: This machine delivers anesthesia to the patient and monitors the level.

Diathermy or Electrocautery Machine: This is used to cut tissue and control bleeding

The Surgical Team

These are the people present in the OR besides the patient. It is up to them to keep the patient alive of course but to also ensure that safety and cleanliness are upheld.

Surgeon: Is the lead of the team and responsible for the planning and cutting of the patient. Most surgeons are specialists.

Surgical Assistant: They work alongside the surgeon, helping the surgeon.

Scrub Nurse: Scrub nurses are in charge of making sure everything stays sterile. They sterilise the surgical instruments and are in charge of minimalising contamination.

Anesthesiologist: The doctor who specialises in anesthesia who monitors the use of anaesthesia.

Circulating Nurse: Circulating nurses manage supplies, equipment and may run messages if needed outside the OR.

Observer: Sometimes med students or other surgeons will observe the surgery. They aren't essential.

General Surgerical Tools

These are just a few tools used with surgeries.

Scalpel – These are the blades used to cut into tissue.

#10: Scalpel with a large curved edge used for making large incisions.

#11: Scalpel with a triangular blade used to make short, shallow cuts.

#12: A small, crescent-shaped blade used to cut sutures

#15: used for short, precise cuts because of its small blade. Ideal for making short, precise incisions because of its small, curved cutting edge. Mostly used in cardiac surgery.

#17: Flat, chisel-like blade for narrow cuts

#18: Narrow, chisel blade for deep cuts and scraping

#20: Large curved blade, used when making a puncture or cut.

#21: Large curved blade, for slicing tissue and puncturing. commonly used for cutting tissue and other procedures that require a puncture or cut.

#22: Like the #10, it is flat and curved cutting edge, used on thick skin.

#23: Large blade that is slightly narrower but pointier

#24: Wide, flat blade with an angle used to make cuts at the corner, used to trim and strip

Forceps - are a gripping tool. Not to be confused with hemostats.

Allis Forceps: Have little teeth running along in them and are for firm tissue such as fascia.

Babcock Forceps: Smooth ended jawed forceps that are used for delicate tissue.

Dunhill Forceps: Small curved, serrated forceps used to hold vessels before ligation.

Lane Tissue Forceps: Forceps with interlocking teeth used to hold tough tissue

Littlewood Forceps: These forceps have blunt teeth, used for tough tissue as well as gaining entry through the umbilicus in laparoscopic surgery.

Sawtell Forceps: curved serrated forceps with a serrated end used to grip vessels

Spencer Wells: Can be curved or straight. They are used to clamp medium/large vessels before ligation

Debakey Forceps: Smooth forceps used for many things but used to grip tissue

Lanes Forceps: Toothed forceps used to grasp most tissues but not the bowel.

Gillies Forceps: Narrow forceps with teeth used on skin.

Scissors - are used to cut sutures and snip things during surgery.

Mayo Scissors: Heavy scissors with blunt ends, either curved or straight, used to cut thick tissue and sutures.

McIndoe Scissors: Curved scissors used to cut/dissect tissue

Hemostats - these are used to clamp vessels to prevent blood flow into the cavity the the surgeons are working in.

Adson Forceps: Can be straight or curved, with either semi-serrated tips or toothed tips, used to clamp vessels and tissues.

Artery Undermining Forceps: Toothed forceps, with ratchetted ringlets. Can be straight or angled, used to hold thick tissues during cardiothoracic surgeries

Bainbridge Forceps: Forceps with long jaws with serrated tips, used to clamp the bowel.

Crile Forceps: A clamp with horizontal, serrated jaws, that can be curved or straight. These are used in laparoscopical practices, for clamping tissue and vessels for cauterization and ligation.

Dandy Forceps: These forces are curved, with half-serrated jaws. Used to control the flow of blood.

Ferguson Angiotribe Forceps: Interlocking blades, curved or straight, used to clamp vessels to control blood flow.

Gemini Mixter Forceps: Curved and serrated, used to hold damaged and delicate vessels during cardiothoracic surgery.

Hartman Forceps: These are narrow, serrated, straight or curved but used primarily for left-handed surgeons. They are used to clamp small vessels.

Jacobson Forceps: Forceps with serrated curved jaws. Used for closing a wound or in tonsillectomies.

Kelly Forceps: Forceps with half-serrated jaws, either curved and straight. They are used for clamp

Kocher Hemostatic Forceps: Has serrated jaws and toothed tips. Used for grasping large blood vessels to control blood flow and holding dense tissue.

Lovelace Forceps: Forceps with fully serrated jaws, used for clamping vessels in gynecologic procedures.

Mikulicz Forceps: Half-serrated jaws with curved tips. Used for clamping the peritoneal sac during abdominal wall closure and the peritoneal tissues in the pelvic cavity.

Mixter Forceps: Right-angled jaws with longitudinal serrations, straight, curved patterns which can be half and fully-serrated. These are used for hard to reach places, used to hold tissue, blood vessels and stitches.

Mosquito Forceps: Short, serrated jaws used for incisions and thin tissues, usually before cauterization.

Rochester Carmalt Forceps: Long, wide serrated jaws. Used for grasping blood vessels.

Rochester Ochsner Forceps: These are used to objects and blood vessels during orthopedic procedures.

Retractors - used to pull back the flesh so the surgeon has better view

Langenbeck Retractor: Hook-shaped retractor, used to separate the edges of wounds. They can come in different sizes depending how deep you want the wound tract.

Norfolk and Norwich Retractor: This retractor is self-retaining, used to keep deep wounds open.

Travers Retractor: Also a self-retaining retractor, but used for much shallower wounds

Other Tools

Cauterization device: used to cauterizate blood vessels to prevent bleeding.

Needle Holder: Used for holding needles while suturing, it looks like a pair of scissors

Rampley Sponge Holding: used to store sponges and gauze

Towel clips: Used to keep towels and drapes in the place

Suction: This machine is sort of like a hose that sucks up blood and other fluids.

Surgical Stapler: Sort of what it says on the tin, a device that staples wounds together quickly.

Laparotomy Sponge/Lap Pad: Is an absorbent pad used to keep the cavity free of excess blood and fluid or to prevent too much bleeding.

Drapes: This is the cloth used to cover the patient and the operating table.

What to Wear to Surgery?

In surgery, contamination is always a fear so the surgeons and their team must dress accordingly in the OR. Most times the patient is draped or wearing a hospital gown.

Protective Cap: This is a cap that covers the hair. Worn by everyone.

Surgical Masks: Worn over the mouth and nose. Usually worn just by the surgical team.

Protective Eyewear: To shield the eyes from blood and debris. Usually worn just by the surgical team.

Gloves: Worn by the surgical team.

Gowns: These are long gowns worn over the scrubs. Worn by the surgical team.

Protective Shoe Covers: Worn over shoes of the surgical team.

Phrases used in the OR

Operations are high stress situations. Often communication is shortened to quick phrases.

Scalpel: Give me a scalpel

Clamp: Give me a clamp

Suction: Suck up this blood/liquid for me.

Retract: Hold back the tissue

Bovie: Give me the cautery equipment

Sponge count: Count the sponges and towels in case we left one in this here guy

Close: Stitch up the patient

Irrigation: Wash out the wound with water

Intubate: Insert a tube in the patient's throat to help them breath

Extubate: Remove the breathing tube

Airplane: Tilt the bed to expose a lateral portion or change the patient’s hemodynamics.

Donut: A support for the patient’s head after anesthesia.

Jump Room: Another OR prepped and waiting for the surgeon for another surgery

Types of Surgery

Surgeons don't just perform every kind of surgery. Most surgeons stick to a practicular specialty.

General Surgery: General surgery focuses on the abdominal organs.

Cardiothoracic Surgery: Deals with everything in the chest, eg. heart and lungs.

Orthopedic Surgery: Focuses on bones and muscle

Neurosurgery: This surgery focuses on the brain, spinal cord, and nervous system.

Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery: This surgery focuses on cosmetic surgery but also reconstructive procedures.

Pediatric Surgery: For babies, children and teenagers.

Vascular Surgery: Focuses on arteries and veins, everything on the vascular system.

Urology: Focuses on the urinary tract and male reproductive organs.

Otolaryngology (ENT): The ears, nose, and throat.

Gynecologic Surgery: Surgery focusing on the female reproductive system.

Examples of surgery

There are thousands of kinds of surgery but I've just listed a few well known ones here.

Appendectomy: Removal of the appendix

Cholecystectomy: Removal of the gallbladder

Coronary Artery Bypass Grafting (CABG): Bypass surgery performed to improve blood flow to the heart

Cesarean Section (C-section): The removal of a baby from the womb surgically.

Hysterectomy: Removal of the uterus.

Mastectomy: Removal of one or both breasts

Tonsillectomy: Removal of the tonsils.

Biopsy: Removal of tissue for examination.

Carotid Endarterectomy: Removal of blockages from in the arteries.

Debridement: Surgical removal of skin that is damaged or infected.

Dilation and Curettage (D&C): Removal of tissue from within the uterus.

Skin Graft: The planting of healthy skin over areas of damaged skin

Spinal Fusion: Joining two or more vertebrae

Rhinoplasty: Surgery to reconstruct or reshape the nose

Prostatectomy: Removal of the prostate gland

Hernia Repair: The repair of a hernia

Total Knee Replacement: The replacement of the knee with artificial components

Hip Replacement: Replacement of hip with artificial components.

Heart Valve Replacement and Repair: The repair of valves in the heart.

Aortic Aneurysm Repair: Repair of enlarged aorta to prevent rupture.

Pacemaker Installation: The installation of a pacemaker to regulate heartbeat.

Craniotomy: Opening up the skull to treat the brain for tumors, aneurysms or repairing damage.

Spinal Decompression: The relieving of pressure on the spinal cord.

Deep Brain Stimulation (DBS): This is the treatment of the brain with electrical pulses.

Breast Augmentation and Reconstruction: The implantion of artificial breasts for cosmetic reasons or to replace them after trauma or removal.

Liposuction: The removal of excess fat in the body.

Ovarian Cystectomy: Removal of ovarian cysts.

Endometriosis Surgery: Removal of endometrial tissue outside the uterus.

Nephrectomy: Removal of kidney

Ureteroscopy: Removal of obstruction in urinary tract

Vasectomy: The clipping of the male reproductive tracts to prevent fertility.

Colectomy: Partial or total removal of the colon.

Gastrectomy: Partial or total removal of the stomach.

Esophagectomy: Partial or total removal of the esophagus

Septoplasty: The correction of a deviated or damage septum.

Cochlear Implantation: Surgery to grant the hard of hearing or deaf to hear without hearing aids due to an implanted device.

The Winchester Method

Let's be honest your character is likely not going to hospital for their needed surgery. That bullet is going to be removed elsewhere and that appendix is coming out on the run. We're writers, we sort of use medicine like a fucking jump rope. THIS IS FOR FICTIONAL PURPOSES ONLY. The basic needs of make your own surgerical tools:

Sterilisation: You need something to sterilise your "tools". You can use alcoholic spirits or boiling water or open fire.

Needle and thread: You have to close yourself up, both need to be sterilised. See my post on stitches.

Cauterization: You need may need something to cauterise the wounds or stop bleeding. Something hot, sterile and metal like the flat of a knife can work short term.

Scalpel: You will need a sharp knife, sterilised and appropriately sized like a small paring knife or the blade of a Swiss army knife.

Bandages and towels: Something to soak up blood and cover. Torn up clothes or sheets can be used but most be sterilised.

Anesthesia/Pain Management: Something for the pain. Strong drink can be used to dull the pain but so can over the counter meds.

[angelpuns]

pov i did in fact get a (v cheap) cane to see if it helped any but I'm??? apprehensive about using it or telling anyone about it cause im?? Idk if it will improve my life but it's a temporary solution until I can go to the doctor. Anyway this is just me telling someone( the internet) about it cause it frankly should not be this big of a deal. It just is cause that's the type of person I am. I mean- my friends can attest to me not being able to stand or walk for long periods of time, I just don't want them to??? i don't wanna say judge me, but maybe think I am being dramatic?? It really is temporary to see if it helps so. Idk. I know they probably wouldn't but man im just.ragh. I also was under the assumption that canes are just for support when walking but apparently nthey are also helpful if you have trouble standing. good to know cause that's where most of my issues lie. walking sucks too but I can usually deal cause im too focused on other things such as 'dont get hit by car' and 'dont let knees get too straight'

ALSO SIDE NOTE I WILL BE GOING TO A DOCTOR SOMETIME AFTER JANUARY IM JUST LITERALLY TOO BUSY AND POOR RN TO DO SO

[dionysiaproductions]

For the record the writing research internet search of "dog carrier antique" was a mistake. Half those things look like iron maidens.

On the other hand, I found this banger of an image:

Why yes, just me driving with my child stored on my lap and my goat in the slapped together 2 by 4 rack right next to us. I'm sure the goat won't try to eat the baby's clothes while I'm busy operating heavy machinery.