#i guess this... technically counts as

[sgtjamesrogers]

I don’t even go here but I’m not gonna see this title and not ask?

3- Stripper Johnny i GUESS

THAAAANK you alyssa, i'm hoping to finish this one in the next month or so because it's really such a slam dunk- daniel's cousin thinks he's being an incredible hastag ally by hiring a male stripper for daniel's bachelor party night, but of course the stripper ends up being johnny lawrence.

This ‘exotic dancer’ gig is not a forever job, Johnny knows that much. 

Not that Johnny was thinking about his potential life-long career path when he joylessly flipped through the classifieds after getting all but a boot in the ass out the door from his last place of employment. He still feels like he got the raw end of that deal; after all, he managed to haul the golf cart out of that water hazard, right? 

At any rate, this dancing gig is a good way for Johnny to get from point A, to point B… whatever point B ends up being. He might not have even considered it, his thumb and index fingers already trapping the thin powdery corner of newspaper in preparation to flip through to the ads for junker cars and free kittens, but.

He could remember overhearing a conversation between a tableful of women while he pushed a wheelbarrow piled high with rolls of sod past the golf course’s outdoor patio. Johnny had slowed a little when he felt their attention alight on him over their martinis, and he’s only a man! So sue him if he wanted to enjoy the sensation of their eyes taking in the damp cut of his abs while he wiped the sweat out of his eyes. 

While he’d lingered there, frowning vaguely at the dirt-sweat streaks on the hem of his shirt and trying not to look too intentionally clenched, he hears the middle of their conversation drift over to him. Their voices are low but in the conspiratorial way of ‘you won’t believe this–’ rather than an attempt at concealing information from Johnny. 

It never stopped being numbly surprising, the sensation of being little more than wallpaper (albeit devilishly handsome wallpaper) among the sort of people who had previously counted him as ‘one of us’. 

[gibbearish]

just saw on the hbomb subreddit that james somerton briefly reactivated his twitter and changed the name to agayraconteur, then 8 hrs later deleted it again because people were noticing, so. everyone who went all in on "he'll keep popping up again and again in new forms" cash your bets in now LMAO

edit: hey yall this post is very out of date but has been getting spikes of notes since the second apology video so i'm gonna be marking it unrebloggable

[claraoswalds]

THE DOCTOR + last words

[zarla-s]

"that isn't how terastilizing works" look do you want this silly joke or not

i was going to have him say his tera type but i couldn't decide on which one would be the flashiest/fanciest and bother him the most. fairy? psychic? dragon? like being the first human to terastilize wouldn't get him enough unwanted attention as it is.

(clearly kabu has to hide him at his house from the reporters and watch over him and help him get a cure and and and)

[patreon]

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

love how Solar Opposites started out as a sitcom about two aliens who can't stand each other, stuck with their teenage clones (whom they also can't stand) & a toddler antichrist (whom they view as a sort of self-sufficient free-roaming hamster?) on a stupid planet they can't stand

and 4 seasons later it's a sitcom about a family of genderqueer aliens, headed by a gay couple in a happy & horny open marriage (with a graphic off-screen sex life, despite their canonical lack of genitalia?) teaching themselves to be okay parents to their 3 kids (whose Sci-Fi Antics now slightly-less-frequently revolve around wreaking havoc on human bystanders, and slightly-more-frequently revolve around alien-clone-sibling-bonding*), to the point that the central plot point becomes "We need to provide our toddler antichrist with a stable home environment."

(also the grumpy alien husband is too busy ingratiating his family with their suburban neighbors to even remember whom or what he dislikes. what is this show)

[absoluteminimum]

an unexpected but in hindsight predictable obstacle to drawing transformers in clothes: I'm bad at drawing the way cloth falls

[gilly-moon]

Another favorite fairy, this time my number one fav!! I had a W.I.T.C.H. obsession as a kid (books/comics only, I could never get past how meh the tv show style was in comparison so I never watched it ^^;;) and Will was always my fav girl! Taranee was a close second though ♡

[possamble]

for your consideration

BDHSJSJDJD THE SHAKY THUMBS UP IM,

[meirimerens]

[The Herb Brides] are no one’s. They’re… the Earth’s. [...] And each other’s, sometimes.

Shörmös and Yyrghene 🌸🌾

[thresholdbb]

what's the threshold theory

There was a post about how Tom is the only crew member who isn't really affected by the Borg, and there's a theory that he has so much luck because he saw the past and the future when he crossed the transwarp threshold. He saw the past and the future, all of time and space. There's some subconscious part of him that remembers that experience. In fact, Tom refused to play a part in Chakotay indulging Annorax's temporal incursions, probably because a part of him knew nothing good could come of it.

If we extend that same theory to Janeway, some of her wild luck with time travel and other crack plans starts to make sense. She doesn't verbally hate time travel until after the events of Threshold, since it happens in Time and Again without complaint. Janeway has an uncanny knack for time travel, as evidenced every time she deals with it. She hates time travel, but it might be because part of her knows exactly how to manipulate the timeline. She manages to avoid the "inevitable" temporal explosion in Future's End, saving both Voyager and Braxton. She resets the entire timeline in Year of Hell, and no one else followed her reasoning. She pulled it off flawlessly. In Relativity, she senses the incidents are all related, despite it being just one reading that connects them. By the time she's involved, she has a temporal incursion factor of .0036 and a time travel protocol named after her, even if that may just be Braxton's personal grudge. Then there's Endgame, where she intentionally changes the timeline. Up until this point, she has been dragged into time travel, but for the first time, she jumps in on purpose. How does Admiral Janeway know how to get them home sooner in a way that completely avoids the Temporal Integrity Commission? It's because she has seen all of time, and part of her knows exactly what needs to happen so she can get Voyager home and do it in a way that becomes baked into the prime timeline. Maybe she doesn't consciously remember what happened during her transformation, but the experience lives in her mind somewhere, guiding her decisions.

[ddd-guy]

"All you need to create your own world is a creative mind."

A simple role-swap AU.

It started as "hahah, what if Test Tube and Cobs switched roles" but ended up evolving into something more.

I haven't decided on all the roles yet, but I have some ideas in mind.

Everything shown here is subject to change.

[cuppajj]

"Once a lowly jelly worm with aspirations beyond anyone's belief, with a bit of magic (and perhaps convincing) it turned into something even stronger... finally, after rigorous training and a bit of dough, it has now achieved its dream and become a - dragon? That's a dragon, right? Whatever he is now, Jelly Dragon(?) Cookie is sure happy to finally have a chance to stick it to the cookies who once laughed at him!" - im being weird on my first crk post kasjhf look i love jelly wormy and i think he deserves to be a dragon... what if he went on a quest and cried so hard at one of the actual dragons that they made him one (air quotes). it was perhaps out of pity but more likely morbid curiosity to see what would happen if a jelly worm of all things got a little taste of power. like giving admin commands to a child on roblox

[sangthael]

this was totally him in jjk270 just trust me

[adobe-outdesign]

[mousethe]

First fanart for this game and of course it's for the body horror fucked up part of the game

[biracy]

Sucks that "likes milfs" was one of the "bits" they dropped abt Jesse as the show went on I really think that they should've kept that around. There's an extremely funny potential outcome of this that I'm thinking of. Can anyone figure it out