#i feel like my body is a weird shape

[cherryhomo]

does anyone have any tips for when your body image is real real bad

[muchmossymess]

hey we all agree that ed gets nightmares about ling absorbing the philosophers stone right

[sunnibits]

GOT TO DO MORE FIGURE DRAWING YESTERDAY WOOOOOO <3333

[fuckdamn]

everytime i’m faced with wild overt misogyny that’s just platformed like it’s nothing i remind myself that people don’t actually have to feel this way about women. men are fully capable of treating women like human beings and viewing them as such. “but socialization but male fantasies but patriatchy speaks through us even when we don’t recognize it” sure but actually regardless there exist men who are fundamentally not raging misogynists and they generally seem happier and better adjusted. misogyny to me isn’t disappointing because “oh i can’t believe Men, as an essentialized category of person, are like this” it’s disappointing because people make the choice to be like this. “it’s my biological imperative as a man to dominate you” okay well it’s my biological imperative as a freaky bitch to dominate you so what now. what biological imperative is making you comment “onlyfans detected opinion rejected” on every picture of any attractive woman. i think i will always be understood by most people as a woman and i’m learning to accept that and trying to like it but misogyny makes me feel very trapped of course. but misogyny is a choice. which means some people make the choice to be misogynistic which is profoundly frustrating. but many other people choose not to be actively misogynistic and i believe anyone could choose not to be actively misogynistic if they wanted. so it’s a whole thing

[puppppppppy]

for like 3 weeks i was wondering why i was sleeping so much and felt listless. and just now I managed to email 3 people and responded to a month old message in the span of an hour because I got back to TAKING MY FUCKIN MEDS..........

[nexus-nebulae]

thinking about when i had such intense phantom limbs as a kid i told my math teacher about it

[sysig]

Very important to implement a goof-off break (Patreon)

[crimeronan]

opened my rheumatology intake papers (for a very serious rheumatology clinic that's HELL to get into because you need to be like, On Death's Door for the referral to be accepted) and they started out like "is your whole family dead yet?? how young were they when they kicked it?? what hospitals have you been in for more than a day in the past year?? what major surgeries have you had??" and i was like "god Damn, okay, i think i'm NOT sick enough to come here. there's nothing wrong with me at all actually. i'm wasting the time of these doctors who should be taking care of patients whose entire families are dead"

then i got to page two.

which was like, "please tell us about your quality of life over the past week with these fatigue/pain/fog/functioning scales, plus check off new symptoms that have appeared in the last year from this long list, also please shade in the parts of your body that experience pain on this diagram"

and.

uh.

well. folks.

i am Definitely sick enough to come here.

[fruitsyrups]

hello 😽

[verdemoth]

thunderstorm came in suddenly and the second rumble was Sooooo loud and apparently hit the yard next to us and i was very nervous and did a self portrait abt it. and then horses got brought up in some way and i did another self portrait abt it. also i got new glasses today yippee

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

me for the majority of the night:

me remembering that my grandma gave me a quilt that was handmade in the 60s by my great grandma:

[churmandurr]

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[sysig]

Okay actually, the OG Just Desserts style was onto something (Patreon)

[uninspiringdyke]

quarterly body issues rehash! (throws confetti)

[imavikingo]

kinda personal (again)

The other day I was scrolling through ig reels and a dude talked about how you don't really need to know every single thing about anatomy to draw accurate/good proportioned bodies, but instead have a good sense of spatial awareness and... Fuck man. I don't have that.

I suck at it so badly in every sense of the word... Like I have had a ton of bruises for being clumsy and hitting myself with furniture or things. I often miss a step and fall of my ass (one memorable time I fell down the stairs like a turtle -bc I had a backpack- and couldn't stand up. Fun times). I also can't seem to draw things without having to check over and over with references (And I still can't get them to look right! And don't get me started at perspective or backgrounds. I've literally cried for/because of those fuckers. That's also why I get so weirded out/perfectionist/nitpicky about my own stuff. Because I can't seem to look at it with "normal" eyes. I've tried, it doesn't work). I often have difficulties with a lot of shit because of it and then some (yay for having a roomba brain, I guess).

And it's not something I can really get better at fast or without a lot of work and time (and patience! Something I also lack, because who has time for that. I need things like yesterday! Chop chop brain. And shit... I can't really wait for stuff man) sure I can have some cheats and help (and the delightful use of references, muaks) , but I can't get better at it in a timely manner (meaning now or soon and for forever. Because I constantly forget how to draw and how to paint and other stuff. It's a real struggle. Also for me to use references means to do a finished drawing and that means fatigue and suffering and nitpicking and self doubt). I never knew about this when I was younger and I never thought it was weird or a symptom of something else. I was always just clumsy, couldn't differentiate from left and right and drew weird proportioned bodies besides other "weird" shit. I didn't have a clue because people (adults) didn't have a real problem with my behavior or way of being because I was overall a good student/kid and had good grades and was mostly quiet (I don't blame them nor my parents, it's just weird to be like that since forever and suddenly realize I can't function like I should as an adult or that I have disabilities that have always been there. The chronic pain doesn't help either, but hey! I'm trying and my life is normal-ish so it isn't terrible. It's just annoying and difficult sometimes)

The point is!!! I'm shit at spatial awareness and I get frustrated because I want to be better at it without the constant fight and struggle!

[yoshistory]

-_____- ive been wanting to wait until i have like much better insurance when my permanent position comes thru but i might just cave and make a dr's appointment for my. ongoing ear infection thats been on-and-off for like. years at this point