#i fear it’s kind of changed idk

[cada4us]

reed and val REDRAW

[randomfandomsgobrrrrrr]

tma au where Jon works from home and basically gets a job similar to home safety hotline where he had to categorize the "calls" he's getting (basically statements), and giving said callers information on the entity hunting them.

But like. At first he only has 3 entities that he has information about and so that wildly screws his perspective (atleast until he gets clearance to learn more). So he totally thinks that Mr. spider was from the corruption or smth until around the end when he gets a infopacket on the web and has a panic attack on how many people he miscatagorized and told them something other than what the needed to hear and how he has walked into the webs trap and can't escape. And all the while due to his lack of information he's been accidentally sending people the wrong instructions which get them killed.

[myopicry]

sometimes I think so much of "queer" discourse surrounds semantics and identity labels because people engaging in these spaces legitimately do not live life outside of the internet. I don't just mean they don't go outside or talk to real people, but the way they interact with real people is never truly free from the internet. I think this is just sort of how gen z are now unfortunately, so much of our lives are consumed by handheld devices and social media platforms, but I find it way more prevalent in artsy, liberal, tra-positive communities. (the amount of times I just hear people straight up quote popular tumblr posts or tiktok trends...)

and surrounding yourself in real life with people who frequent the same internet circles as you and thus hold the same beliefs is a great way to not end up experiencing anything actually real, and thus you never really learn anything from your life experiences or from other perspectives, much less experiences of relationships or sex or romance. leading to people caring way too much about words and perception with things like pronouns or microlabels or "validity." everything is about optics and holding the "correct" opinions because that's the state of the internet these days! of course they'd ignore the actual material aspects of oppression, what is the internet if not a breeding ground for consumerist distraction from dealing with the various staggering issues in society?

"touch grass" isn't even a good enough solution anymore. can you partake in any hobby without thinking of how other people would percieve it? can you have a conversation without parroting the words of a tiktok post? can you seek love and relationships without obscuring it in layers of branding? can you understand yourself, truly understand who you are, without obsessing over how it looks on a screen?

[ategods]

[thirdmagic]

one day this blog will inevitably return to the regular scheduled mostly-fandom-with-only-occasionally-politics blogging state that i intend it to be and enjoy more, but, man. even if i return to blogging like normal, i will not be doing it as the same person i used to be because after all this i myself am just not the person i used to be.

[oneroomjestershow]

Haii, how are u doing? :>

[velvet-games]

the latest 666 update has been haunting me all morning lmao

[lockhartandlych]

tfw you're so used to the body you're in feeling foreign that you might look in the mirror one day and not even recognize your real self looking back

[opera-ghost]

me laughing at the same jokes i’ve heard 1000 times every time i listen to/watch a recording of phantom

[danothan]

i’ve been having a hard time realizing and grieving my naivety/lack of intuition, especially relating to autism and ocd. there’s smth so helpless in feeling like you can’t trust yourself. but i think i’m starting to reach a point of balance. ik i don’t have the best judgment, but maybe my intuition can be the kindness i judged as naivety

i just couldn’t accept the idea that kindness (as far as i understood it at least) could have led me into harm’s way, especially bc protecting myself feels so “cruel,” so maybe that’s not the narrative i have to accept. sometimes i feel like i’m slipping into old habits when i catch myself giving someone a second chance, or the benefit of the doubt, but it’s not the same now as it was before. kindness never led me into harm’s way, it was my lack of trust in myself. i don’t need to dial in my kindness, i just need to strengthen my trust. i need to practice informed kindness

[robotpanties]

a bit grateful people are receptive to the whole. pregnancy thing because ive had the horror aspect of it itching around in my brain for so long. months. maybe a year.

[maretriarch]

turns out how not to be deficient in fat in your diet is to stop eating only low fat versions of foods

[perilegs]

ok i might need to force myself to not romance astarion bc i don't want to know what it says about me to turn down karlach, the woman of my dreams, the character made to cater me personally, like, if she was real i'd bring the moon and stars down for the chance to see her smile, she's everything i've hoped for in a rpg companion, what does it say about me if i turn that down for someone like astarion

[lexydakitten]

been debating if i should try to get a drawing tablet and whatnot recently. as of now and as i have for the past 3-4 years i've just fingerpainted on my phone using ibispaintx, so if i did get one i'd have to actually believe i'd use it . and i do have a tendency with art to fixate on one new art-related thing or skill that i don't have, hard to tell if it's just that or if i actually am interested. i only started thinking abt it more cuz like.. the only reason i havent looked into that stuff already is because im under the assumption i would NOT get along with styluses. but i also know next to nothing abt that technology. i feel like it would help since my main frustration with art is that it takes me forever as i'm only using my fingers. it might make things like lineart something i can actually do without getting irrationally angry. shrug

really only yelling into the void here cuz im tired again uaaghh... do i want or is it just a whim... i wouldnt know if i'd actually like it or not but i feel like it could help with a few things just a lil bit..

[mist-the-wannabe-linguist]

There is your favourite song, there is your go-to song when you're sad, there is your childhood nostalgia song, and then there is That One Song you heard once when you were five years old and then never again and it ripped straight through your soul, rewired your brain, got absorbed into your DNA and changed something fundamental about you as a person. It has been fifteen years since you heard it and you can still recall the memory almost perfectly. It's not present in any of your playlists because it is simply Too Powerful. That song is your personal patron god

[diddlesnap]

I think there were some serious growing pains when katniss and peeta were starting to "grow close" again.