#i dont know what to tag this as but im also screaming to the void so

[myenemytolover]

i love you (but I cannot survive you) — a thiam playlist

i. All I Want | Kodaline

'Cause you brought out the best of me, a part of me I'd never seen. You took my soul and wiped it clean; our love was made for movie screens.

ii. The Killer Was a Coward | Dermot Kennedy

And when I think of you, I think of spirit defined, and I think of all the love that we shared in a very dark time.

iii. Demons | Imagine Dragons

Don't wanna let you down, but I am hell-bound. Though this is all for you, don't wanna hide the truth.

iv. Take on the World | You Me At Six

And nobody knows you the way that I know you; we'll fight, we'll crawl into the night. I won't let go; with you by my side, the calm, the storm, we'll face it all.

v. Eyes on Fire | Blue Foundation

And just in time, in the right place, steadily emerging with grace.

vi. I Found | Amber Run

And I found love where it wasn't supposed to be, right in front of me.

vii. Litost | X Ambassadors

And how long must I stay? Will I lay by your side just to say that I'm yours and you'll never be mine?

viii. Another Love | Tom Odell

And if somebody hurts you, I wanna fight, but my hands been broken, one too many times, so I'll use my voice, I'll be so fucking rude.

ix. Fortnight | Taylor Swift; Post Malone

And I love you; it's ruining my life.

x. The Show | Niall Horan

Life is like a board game some of the time; mistakes and heartbreaks are no crime, but there's a lot creeping through under broken skies.

xi. Guilty as Sin | Taylor Swift

What if the way you hold me is actually what's holy? If long-suffering propriety is what they want from me, they don't know how you've haunted me so stunningly.

xii. Us | James Bay

I still hear the howling, I still feel the rush; over the riots, above all the noise, and through all the worry, I still hear your voice.

xiii. Fade | Lewis Capaldi

That I'd end up so caught up in need of your demons that I'd be lost without you leading me astray. Guess I'm such a fucking fool for the way that you caught me.

xiv. Saturdays | Louis Tomlinson

My heart might be broken, but I won't be broken down.

xv. Fine Line | Harry Styles

You've got my devotion, but man, I can hate you sometimes.

xvi. The Great War | Taylor Swift

It turned into something bigger. Somewhere in the haze, got a sense I'd been betrayed.

xvii. Holding On To Heartache | Louis Tomlinson

I called you twice, but then regretted it and changed my number.

xviii. Hoax | Taylor Swift

My only one, my kingdom come undone, my broken drum; you have beaten my heart. Don't want no other shade of blue but you; no other sadness in the world would do.

xix. I miss you, I'm sorry | Gracie Abrams

Nothing happened in the way I wanted; every corner of this house is haunted.

xx. my tears ricochet | Taylor Swift

And I can go anywhere I want, anywhere I want, just not home. And you can aim for my heart, go for blood, but you would still miss me in your bones.

xxi. favorite crime | Olivia Rodrigo

I defended you to all my friends, and now, every time a siren sounds, I wonder if you're around 'cause you know that I'd do it all again.

xxii. Somebody to Die For | Hurts

And there's no hell that he can show me that's deeper than my pride 'cause I will never be forgotten. Forever, I'll fight.

xxiii. So High School | Taylor Swift

No one's ever had me, not like you...Truth, dare, spin bottles, you know how to ball; I know Aristotle.

xxiv. Complex | Katie Gregson-MacLeod

I need him like water; he thinks that I'm alright. I'm not feeling human; I think he's a good guy, but it's complex. It's a complex.

xxv. Ghost Of You | 5 Seconds of Summer

So I drown it out like I always do. Dancing through our house with the ghost of you, and I chase it down, with a shot of truth, that my feet don't dance like they did with you.

xxvi. Give Me Love | Ed Sheeran

Give me love like never before 'cause lately I've been craving more and it's been a while, but I still feel the same.

xxvii. illicit affairs | Taylor Swift

And you know damn well, for you, I would ruin myself a million little times.

xxviii. Holding On And Letting Go | Ross Copperman

It's everything you wanted, it's everything you don't.

xxix. Atlantis | Seafret

Now all the birds have fled, the hurt just leaves me scared.

xxx. Hurricane | Fleurie

Though I am breaking down again, I am aching now to let you in.

xxxi. You and I | PVRIS

We can meet in the middle, bodies and souls collide. Dance in the moonlight when all the stars align.

xxxii. Crazy in Love - Remix | Beyonce

I'm not myself. Lately, I'm foolish; I don't do this. I've been playing myself, baby I don't care.

xxxiii. this is me trying | Taylor Swift

And maybe I don't quite know what to say, but I'm here in your doorway.

xxxiv. Can't Catch Me Now | Olivia Rodrigo

You can't catch me now, I'm coming like a storm into your town.

xxxv. Perfect | Hedley

I'm not perfect, but I keep trying 'cause that's what I said I would do from the start.

xxxvi. Til My Heart Stops | Too Far Moon

I almost died the day I lost you; I'll keep breathing til my heart stops.

xxxvii. The Alchemy | Taylor Swift

There was no chance, trying to be the greatest in the league. Where's the trophy? He just comes running over to me.

xxxviii. The Exit | Conan Gray

Feels like we had matching wounds, but mine's still black and bruised, and yours is perfectly fine now. Feels like we buried alive something that never died.

xxxix. Don't Forget About Me | CLOVES

Lost through time, and that's all I need: so much love, then one day buried. Hope you're safe, 'cause I Iay you leaves; is there more than we can see?

xl. Hurts Like Hell | Fleurie

I don't want them to know the way I loved you; I don't think they'd understand it, no. I don't think they would accept me, no. I loved, and I loved, and I lost you.

xli. Is There Somewhere | Halsey

'Cause I clutched your arms like stairway railings, and you clutched my brain and eased my ailing.

xlii. Burn with You | Lea Michele

We're not healthy, barely breathing, but this pain keeps my heart beating.

xliii. Cringe | Matt Maeson

Lover, come hold me; could you forget? That I got a secret, digging a ditch.

xliv. Him & I | G-Eazy; Halsey

We got that love, the crazy kind. I am his, and he is mine, in the end, it's him and I.

xlv. An Evening I Will Not Forget / Furthest Thing | Dermot Kennedy

Days with nothing but laughing loud underneath my coat, when you tap my shoulder, hold my hand; nights with nothing but dark in there, you could be my armor then.

xlvi. Call It What You Want | Taylor Swift

You don't need to save me, but would you run away with me?

xlvii. I'll Never Love Again | Lady Gaga

And I want to pretend that it's not true, oh baby, that you're gone 'cause my world keeps turning, and turning, and turning, and I'm not moving on.

xlviii. This Town | Niall Horan

And I know that it's wrong that I can't move on, but there's something about you. If the whole world was watching, I'd still dance with you.

xlix. Without Fear | Dermot Kennedy

And now I really think you're heaven-sent 'cause you've been forcin' all these hollow hearts to feel again. And now I really think you're heaven-sent, but there's a beauty in being broken; I've been seein' it.

l. Waiting Room | Phoebe Bridgers

Know it's for the better.

li. Only Love Can Hurt Like This | Paloma Faith

Burning hot through my veins, love is torture; makes me more sure only love can hurt like this.

lii. Still Falling For You | Ellie Goulding

And just like that, all I breathe, all I feel, you are all for me, I'm in.

liii. Daylight | Taylor Swift

I once believed love would be burning red, but it's golden.

liv. Margaret | Lana Del Rey; Bleachers

'Cause when you know, you know.

lv. Lost Without You | Freya Ridings

You were the only safe haven that I've known; hits me at full speed, feel like I can't breathe and nobody knows this pain inside me.

lvi. I Fell In Love With The Devil | Avril Lavigne

Got me playin' with fire, baby, hand me the lighter. Tastes just like danger, chaotic anger.

lvii. Million Reasons | Lady Gaga

I've got a hundred million reasons to walk away, but baby, I just need one good one to stay.

lviii. But Daddy I Love Him | Taylor Swift

No, I'm not coming to my senses; I know he's crazy, but he's the one I want.

lix. Ultraviolet | Freya Ridings

No, I can't hide it, and you're reading all of me.

lx. Sunday | Dermot Kennedy

You're one of few, boy, who can safely say they had somebody truly love them back.

lxi. golden hour | JVKE; Ruel

You know nothing compares to the shattering feeling I get, oh, when you're not right there.

lxii. Daylight | David Kushner

You and I drink the poison from the same vine. Oh, I love it, and I hate it at the same time.

lxiii. Half Hearted | We Three

The fighting is done, and nobody's won, so now I'm just laying here in pieces on the floor.

lxiv. Always Remember Us This Way | Lady Gaga

So when I'm all choked up, but I can't find the words every time we say goodbye, baby, it hurts.

lxv. Latch | Sam Smith

Now I've got you in my space; I won't let go of you. Got you shackled in my embrace, I'm latching on to you.

lxvi. Say Don't Go | Taylor Swift

'Cause you kiss me, and it stops time, and I'm yours, but you're not mine.

lxvii. Put A Little Love On Me | Niall Horan

When the lights come up and there's no shadows dancing, I look around as my heart is collapsing 'cause you're the only one I need.

lxviii. Ho Hey | The Lumineers

I belong with you; you belong with me; you're my sweetheart.

lxix. XO | John Mayer

Your heart is glowing, and I'm crashing into you.

lxx. Strange Love | Halsey

Everybody wants to know about how it felt to hear you scream; they know you walk like you're a God, they can't believe I made you weak.

lxxi. You Mean The World To Me | Freya Ridings

And it kills me that you might not know after all, 'cause I know I don't let you see, but you mean the world to me, and I know that I can be pretty mean, but you mean the world to me.

lxxii. Dark Paradise | Lana Del Rey

Love you forever can't be wrong; even though you're not here, you won't move on. That's how we played it.

lxxiii. Oceans | Seafret

I want you, and nothing comes close to the way I need you. I wish I could feel your skin and I want you from somewhere within.

lxxiv. The Archer | Taylor Swift

All the king's horses and all the king's men couldn't put me together again 'cause all of my enemies started out friends; help me hold onto you. I've been the archer; I've been the prey. Who could ever leave me, darling? But who could stay?

lxxv. MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT | Loveless

In the middle of the night, just call my name; I'm yours to tame.

lxxvi. Train Wreck | James Arthur

You can say what you like 'cause see, I would die for you. I'm down on my knees, and I need you to be my God, be my help, be a savior who can unbreak the broken.

lxxvii. Walls | Louis Tomlinson

For every question, why, you were my because.

lxxviii. Infinity | Jaymes Young

'Cause you're the reason I believe in fate, you're my paradise, and I'll do anything to be your love or be your sacrifice.

lxxix. Salvation | Gabrielle Aplin

Just a trick of light to bring me back again, those wild eyes, a psychedelic silhouette. I never meant to fall for you, but I was buried underneath, and all that I could see was white.

lxxx. Sleep On The Floor | The Lumineers

Take all your savings out 'cause if we don't leave this town, we might never make it out. I was not born to drown, baby; come on.

lxxxi. Castle on the Hill | Ed Sheeran

I still remember these old country lanes when we did not know the answers.

lxxxii. The Other Side | Ruelle

I don't want to know what it's like to live without you; don't want to know the other side of a world without you.

lxxxiii. Angel With A Shotgun | The Cab

They say before you start a war, you better know what you're fighting for. Well, baby, you are all that I adore; if love is what you need, a solider, I will be.

lxxxiv. Black Friday | Tom Odell

You look so pretty, pretty like the wind. Every time you touch me, I feel adrenaline.

lxxxv. Die With A Smile | Lady Gage, Bruno Mars

So I'ma love you every night, like it's the last night, like it's the last night. If the world was ending, I'd wanna be next to you.

lxxxvi. Northern Attitude | Noah Kahan

If I get too close and I'm not how you hoped, forgive my northern attitude. Oh, I was raised out in the cold. If the son doesn't rise until summertime, forgive my northern attitude. Oh, I was raised on little light.

lxxxvii. "Slut!" | Taylor Swift

Half awake, takin' your chance. It's a big mistake; I said, "It might blow up in your pretty face." I'm not saying, "Do it anyway," but you're going to.

lxxxviii. Backroads | Lonely The Brave

So the sinners stopped, and the villains turned, and I'll be the sky, and you be the bird.

lxxxix. Angel By The Wings | Sia

Oh, so, your wounds, they show. I know you have never felt so alone. But hold on, head up, be strong.

lxxxx. Too Deep | Ritual, Delilah

You said my signs were vital, that every touch was tidal. You held me, you held me so right, you held me so tight.

[fadeintolight]

pont pont vesszőcske

[mementoasts]

posting stuff online because i truly just love sharing my silly creations with anyone who may also love them vs. wanting to deactivate and move to a forest every time i'm met with positive feedback (i am terrified of people and of being recognized/acknowledged)

[bitchkay]

Free anonymous ask to talk about Quartus and any headcanons you have about him lmao

Heck, make this about a fanfic if you want

Talk about him, go crazy, go stupid, go batshit insane even

[Ask received: oct 2nd 2023]

You dont fucking understand I'm so fucking feral about him.

Its the fact I should probably be embarrassed about it but yall I'm too far gone😣😣

You know how you see comments like "oh I hear sumn puring😼😼" that was me.

Literally as soon as that man came on the screen I was like 'oh... *gulp*... why my pussy thumpin--'

Like bro is saying the most horrifying, terrible shit and I'm like

I'd literally let that man do unspeakable things to me.

Quartus was introduced in the second to last chapter of book four so in the last chapter yk when Secondus was introduced literally as soon as he popped up on the screen I was like "Hi daddy😋" OUT LOUD‼ LIKE I SAID THAT SHIT‼

IM SO FUCKING DELUSIONAL YALL IM SO MENTALLY ILL ABOUT HIM

Bro said this —THIS EXACT SCREENSHOT TOO- and I was like... I need to fuck him right this minute😋😋

Yall I'd let him face fuck me until I throw up all over it.

I'd literally let him ruin me.

Tear me the fuck apart.

I'm but a hole.

I'd literally let that man use my mouth as a cum dumpster.

My throat is a daycare.

As soon as he has an erection I'm on my fucking knees. Tongue out. Ready to serve. Bent over. Pussy wet. Cock sleeve ready to be filled.

I wanna be fucked.

I want him to fuck me.

Yall do not fucking understand, every and all ounce of decorum just goes straight out the fucking window

He can misgender me and I'd call it degradation bitch I'm moaning louder‼

Slap me around like a whore‼

Quartus: *literally just on the screen*

Listen

I'm not gon lie yall.

I'm so horny rn--

Nah cus look, the gold chain is enough for me.

BUT THE RINGS--⁉️⁉️

IM LITERALLY OUT OF COMMISSION

IM DONE

IM FUCKING DONE

IM SO FUCKING FERAL YALL

no cus--

YALL--

those rings will be covered in cum when hes done with me.

listen--

WHEN HES KNUCKLES DEEP IN MY--

im gonna cry yall.

I want that gold chain swinging in my face while he wrecking my shit up.

That goddamn necklace be slapping me in the face and shit all while hes plowing me into oblivion.

HIS DICK IS SO BIG YALL😭😭

YALL

NAH CUS HIS DICK IS SO BIG YALL IM GOING INSANE

it's so meaty and thick--

MY BRAIN IS BRAINING YALL

Oh I bet it's heavy too--

IM SHORT CIRCUITING

I probably wouldn't even be able to take it🤭🤭

It's like shoving a sausage into a key hole😳

He'd make it fit tho😋(by force)

Yall lucky I'm flexible, bro would break my fucking back

Fortunately for me I have scoliosis so my back would hurt either way😼😼

HE HAS BOOBS YALL

BIG BEEFY BOOBIES MMMFFHSHSHIWHENDMDKDHDHD--

I'm not okay.

I'm so unwell yall🤒

This how you know I'm gone😵💫💫

Cus all self respect I ever had for myself just goes flying out the windows poof💨 gone

It's not even like bro is morally grey, bro is just evil and I fuck with it😋

I wanna fuck w/ him👁👁

I wanna fuck him.

Yall I think I been celibate for too long-- LMFAOO--

Cus yall I want him so bad

I need him to be injected into my bloodstream(sexual)

Literally toss me arround like a slut😵

I will be nothing if not a concubine for him.

Quartus can literally break all my bones and I'd cum.

Like it's crazy

I'd drink his cum like a fucking milkshake yummy

Fill me up daddy😩😩

Me when he's done w/ me:

I'm not okay yall

Like I'm so out of sorts rn😣✨

He can kill me and I'd just like "harder daddy😋😋" like I'm so fucking crazy

Like bro literally showed up on screen and worked his way into my fucking prefrontal cortex.

This man makes my mars sign go haywire like I'm so fucking horny for him😣😣

Yall I think I need a lobotomy--

Like I need to fixed

I'm so not normal

I'm not okay

I'm so fucking unwell

I need Quartus literally inside my body.

I'm literally just a vessel. A hole. A pussy.

Bro showed up on the screen and made me his bitch.

[fire-but-ashes-too]

get to know my oc!

thank you so so so much @flock-from-the-void for the tag <3

im so excited to do this, finally all the unnecessary traits I gave her will be useddd so so happy

gently tagging: @leisoree @rmgrey-author @digital-chance @maewrites13 @briannaswords @tea-and-mercury @anonymousfoz and anyone else who'd like to join :)

this is my forever beloved (and one of my first ocs that managed to not get tossed away) Giada from Flowers and Homicide (before it was murderous roses)

As I step in the lab, a rotting smell fills my nostrils. I'm seriously tempted to drop this crazy interview and go back home, but then I think of my boss.

And so I keep on walking through hell, knowing that the previously cited boss's rage would be even worse.

There's some guy cleaning a syringe near what I presume is a corpse (don't vomit, don't vomit, dont' vomit) and so I approach him and ask him if he knows where a girl named Giada could be.

After a couple seconds, he sends me off in direction of a room with glass panels, through them I catch sight of a dark, curly mass of hair and knock on the door.

"Hello, are you by any chance Giada?" the foreign name is still new on my tongue, I hope I didn't pronounce it wrong.

"Yes, that's me! What can I help you with?" she answers smiling brightly at me.

"I'm from Tumblr-News," I explain "I was hoping you'd have time for a couple of questions..."

"Oh! Sure! I'm on my break right now, so we have a good 20 minutes for talking"

Are you named after anyone?

Huh, interesting question. No, I wasn't named after a person, but an object. A gemstone. See, my family's half Italian and Giada, in Italian, means jade, also my grandmother's favourite stone.

I think she said something about a ring and a proposal.... doesn't matter though.

When was the last time you cried?

Ha haa... Is this really necessary? Yeah? Ok..Yesterday. I just'd just gotten my period and ice cream fell on my shirt. Don't judge, it makes me really emotional.

The period. Not the ice-cream.

Do you have kids?

Do I really look that old? Damn. And no, I don't have kids and don't plan on them.

Do you use sarcasm?

I believe sarcasm should be a love language. Yes I do, anytime I can, I love it, it's half of my personality.

What's the first thing you notice about people?

Well, I'm a med student, so probably the overall appereance, if they're sleeping enough, if they're eating enough, stuff like that.

Also if they look like a murderer. Or like a person who killed someone.

Guilty, in general.

What's your eye colour?

They're jade, like my name. Just kidding, I'd love to have green eyes but I don't have them.

She leans closer to me and opens her eyes more than I thought was humanly possible.

I don't know if you can see through the glasses, but there is a bit of mud green in the brown, so technically my eyes are a bit green.

Mostly brown though.

Scary movies or happy endings?

I'm literally standing in a lab full of cadavers. What do you think?

Any special talents?

Oh oh I know this! I can lick my nose! Want to see?

she brings her tongue to her nose and makes a muffled scream while pointing to it.

I also have an apparently worrying knowledge about poisons and death, but I'm studying forensic, can you blame me?

Where were you born?

In an hospital? Duh. It was in San Francisco if you care to know.

What are your hobbies?

I've already said poisons but I'll say it again, they are super interesting, did you know we exist just because some ancient monkeys got high? many times, and those chemicals extended their brain cells and so they got smarter. It's amazing!

I also love magic, I've thought about joining a cult or something, but those people are mad. Worse than me. I've been to a session, and they were all dressed up strange, candles everywhere, there was the star on the ground, you know that star in the circle? That one.

But I firmly believe in faeries, coincidences do not exist, it's them meddling with our lives. You can't change my mind.

Do you have any pets?

I've always wanted a lizard or something like that, maybe a snake even if I'm low-key scared of them. They're absolutely stunning, but what if one bites me? They are super venomous.

But when I was little I had a goldfish, his name was Alastair, it was my favourite character from a book, can't remember which. It died after month.

It's buried in my parents' backyard. Poor little thing.

Any sport that you play/played?

I think you can tell that I'm not the sportiest person ever, but I was on the track team.

I absolutely sucked, but I was in it.

Oh and in winter I always went skiing with my family so also that.

How tall are you?

I'm 5.3 and I hate it. At least I can wear heels. But I usually don't cause they hurt my feet, apart from a pair of boots, those are my salvation. Sometimes I even wear them here, not today tho.. sorry I'm blabbering.

What's your favourite subject?

Oh, it's the first year I'm taking it but it's super interesting, it's called anesteti- anast- anesthesiology... Yeah anesthesiology. Hate the name love the subject. I think I like it because most anesthetics are also poisons.

But yeah, right now it's my favourite subject.

And finally, what's your dream job?

Coroner. Or working in the forensic squad.

Right now I'm in an internship, but if it goes well they might keep me around even next year.

"And that's it, thank you so much or answering, I'll leave you to... whatever you'll be doing" I smile uncomfortably and hug her quickly.

"Just in time, by break's over so I better get working"

She sets down her cup and shrugs on a white lab coat, quickly waves at me and just like that she's gone.

I walk as fast as I can, anxious to get rid of this disgusting smell.

[alchemiclee]

i've been told/keep seeing posts about people suddenly not liking when people add tags to their posts with their own thoughts/feelings/opnions/experiences, and even people that say not to tag with certain common organizational tags (like ships for example i see the most. some people use a ship name for organization purposes and not necessarily for shipping. for example i use "collei and her dads" for cyno, tighnari, collei art for my organization so I cam find them again and theres been a few artists screaming not to use ship tags and that could be seen as a ship tag. so what do i do? not organize your art into my tags and let it get lost and never seen again? not share your art at all? kinda silly but whatever, ill just ignore your art).

I personally think that's all a bit ridiculous....i don't know if that's a more recent thing (like with twitter people coming here suddenly and expecting to act like this is twitter) or if it happened in the years since I took a break from tumblr. but bAcK iN mY DaY we used tags as a little whisper to add our own thoughts without interrupting the main post. adding hard comments or replies was more seen as "too much/too loud" if it wasn't something directly meant for OP. tags were usually never meant for OP and were always for the reblogger and their followers. these days more and more people seem to think tags on their posts are all speaking to them directly or interrupting their post (not to say you can't speak to OP through tags, like i'll say nice things about their art in tags) but not everything in someone's tags on a post they reblog from you is for you! you can ignore it!!!

I know on twitter (where I went after leaving tumblr a while back) people use quote retweets to speak to the OP often. but not always. I sometimes would quote a tweet to add my own thoughts while using the quote as like a citation to credit OP for the idea. but I have a few times where the OP thought I was speaking to/about them and got very upset about it. one was a large account who quoted me back and got very nasty and sent their minions after me. quotes are louder than tumblr tags. so that's more understandable, and I was always very hesitant to do it, but I personally see indirect tweets about another post as extremely rude and posting screenshots of tweets on twitter is also rude.

I loved coming back here mainly for the tag system! I missed being able to share a post and also quietly add my thoughts. go on long rambles related to the main post without stealing their post completely or needing to make a whole new post. I know most old tumblr users get that and don't care, probably. I NEVER saw anyone complain about it in the past. only say how much they love it. it was just part of how this site worked for us. a culture thing we naturally created. so i'm assuming it's mostly new users who don't get this culture? it also doesn't help tumblr made it so you now see tags in your notes tab and not just comments added and replies. before, you would have to go to "someone reblogged your post" to see if they added tags because tumblr only showed comments. I personally LOVE when people add tags to my post with their thoughts and stories and whatnot. ai i'd go to every reblog I got to see if there's tags added. it's like an uncommitted interaction. they dont expect a reply, i don't expect a reply. they are isolated thoughts, but still related. it's still a form of interaction, without the pressure of being direct, and I feel seen/heard when they add them. (it means they're not a bot, auto reblogging my posts /hj) seeing tags on my posts i'm not just shouting into the void alone and someone sees me. me adding tags to a post is a gentle "you're not alone/I hear you/im a real person not a bot" from me. but it also could be me saying "your post inspired me! I want to write something too! but im being quiet about it so i dont take away from your post and your post gets all the credit" when I add my own little tag ramble.

so the fact that people are now suddenly being upset by people adding their own experiences and thoughts to tags is super disappointing and and frankly annoying. tags don't take away from your post and you can just ignore them! no one is forcing you to expand the tags in your notes and read them! hardly anyone will see them. most will only read your post and not people's tags! I know no one usually reads my tags because i've added secret messages to the end of my tags and no one ever responds to it lmao things like send a pic in my ask and i'll draw it for you.

yes I know "RESPECT PEOPLE BOUNDARIES" but it kind of disrespects my needs as well. theres a thin line between someone's boundaries being crosses and someone's needs not being met. but that's a whole debate i'm not willing to have so don't start it. (not that kind of boundary is easy to not cross. not bringing up arguments. but asking people to not use a main function of a website is kind of pushing it imo...) yeah I want to respect boundaries the best i can, but unless you say in the post "don't reblog and add your own tags" no one will know and you get upset when no one knows. and no, no one will read your profile/pinned post before reblogging. no one will go to the original post and read your tags. they will only reblog it right off their dash if they aren't seeing it directly from you in the tags/for you page. some people will reblog 100 posts a day. they won't go to every profile/original post before reblogging just to see if you have any special conditions and rules for your random one post out of hundreds they see a day. that's too much to expect, honestly, sorry to say!

but this is tumblr. maybe it's better for people to accept the culture/etiquette here and let it happen without complaining, or realize this isn't the place for them! because it doesn't meet their needs and boundaries! and that's ok! it doesn't have to be your place. you don't need to stay here if you don't like how it works! asking an entire website to "respect your boundaries" by not participating in a basic or essential function of the website is a little ridiculous to be fair....

no i'm not saying your boundaries don't deserve to be respected. i'm saying this probably isn't the place to have those boundaries in the first place. because there's am established way this site functions that works in counter to your wanted boundaries, so it just doesn't fit your needs. and like I said that's ok! you don't need to stay here if it upsets you that much! it's better if you find a social media where people can't share your posts. like a simple blog site that doesn't have a share function! or like Instagram? people cant share those posts. (sorry, I dont know much about social media) if you really want people to stop adding tags that bad, either turn off reblogs completely, or ask staff to add a notification option to turn off seeing added tags on reblogs! (if you're veeerry lucky, and not a trans woman, they might listen to you)

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

ok its me again hi AAAHHHH this is so nice i feel so warm im lying on my bed kickin my lil legs i cant believe this thank you for being nice omgggg now im on a roll im gonna say things about julian hkdhjgdgjf

only one song really that i scanned the whole tag looking for to see if anyone said it before and i was so surprised that i didnt find it and i went to check the official playlists on spotify cause maybe its on there already and thERE ISNT ONE WHAT???? i had the muriel one liked on here and id never checked any other ones out lmao but like i swear there had to be one?? like maybe they made it first and its somewhere separately??? julian is like the most popular one how the hell does he not get a spotify list is that how this tag was created?? *gasp* am i discovering the ~fandom lore~

(just gonna say you dont actually need to answer any of that in detail dont waste your time gksgkydgjf im just screaming into the void cause i was so flabbergasted after those 3 whole minutes of research i put into this)

ANYWAY the actual song would be House of Wolves by our lord and saviour MCR! its so good for him with his whole Woe is Me drama king vibe lol and the plaguey thematicssss mmmm delicious TELL ME im a BAD BAD BAD BAAD MAAAAN aight you lil masochist i see u and the "you better run like the devil cause they never gonna leave you alone" you get it caUSE HES A FUGITIVE DO YOU GET THE DEEP UNRAVELABLE METAPHORS DO YOU GET IT DO YOU G aight shut up hkhfjtdy anyway

ok i lied jystfhte heres another one i just remembered i really wanted to put here its not new but just in case somebody hasnt seen it yet lmao its such a masterpiece ill do anything to give it its due here ya go

https://youtu.be/61HltPN_k3g

and the other thing im really glad to have seen people mention here is musical songs cause thats one of the things i love about him the most like yass we love a thespian king slay grl so then anytime im binging a musical there always come the intrusive thoughts of "aw hed love this one" and "oh hed be great for this role" like i went to see f-ing swan lake with my f-ing grandpa and one of the major takeaways i got from the experience was (UH IM GONNA PUT A SPOILER WARNING HERE? I GUESS? IN CASE ANYONE CARES HELLO JULIAN BAD ENDING SPOILERS AHEAD DO MOVE ALONG NOW IF YOU DONT LIKE THAT AVERT YOUR GAZE CITIZENS LMAO LIKE YOU HAVENT SEEN FANARTS N ADS ALREADY ALRIGHT ALRIGHT) "omg jules would be so perfect as that bird guy villain IN HIS BIRD GUY SHAPE TOO OMG WITH THE WINGS ON STAGE THIS IS AWESOME WHY CANT I DRAW GOOD GODDA-"

anyway hed love hadestown (hed at least try to cast muriel as hades cause hes perfectly intimidating for it but theres way too many lines which okay Maybe but AND he has to sing???? nah hes out bkgdhkdt) i dont know what hed think of pierre natasha & the great comet cause its maybe a little eccentric i suppose but i think hed appreciate the cultural roots of the vibe with him being fantasy ruso-slav-ukrainian-whatnot heritage i reckon and hed definitely have a blast at a live performance and hed ABsolutely join in with the actors in between the rows at some point and theyd ABSOlutely let him cause hes that good and game recognize game cmon hes gonna show you amateurs what a real kazotski looks like

i can also see him enjoying sweeney todd, for its delightful edgyness, maybe even some themes relatable for him, and his sappy ass would SO memorise Pretty women to whip it out at an opportune serenading moment khgdturshc im so cringe and loving it

well i cant think of any more shows to throw him together with so thus ends my soliloquy wow i cant believe thats how you spell that anyway i hope anybody who knew what the hell im talking about enjoyed all that jgfztits see you in another 20 minutes when i come back like "AND ANOTHER thing-

Yay, it's the character song essays anon!! :D

I'm glad to see you back, and I will once again be re-linking the song you shared below and adding your suggestions to the tag ^.^

And frankly, I'm 76% certain that one of Julian's love languages is theatre, especially musical theatre. That could be tickets, that could memorizing the lines from one of this favorite scenes and reciting it back to him, it could be showing up to every single performance he's involved in :)

I'm glad to see you back in my inbox, friend, feel free to message me if you ever want to obsess over the characters together! Cheers -

brainrot

[lecuntification]

Music Through Your Eras Tag Game!

thanks for the tag @ifritfan !!!

1️⃣first song/artist you remember liking: Maroon 5, Melanie Martinez and Marina.... 

👶middle school anthem (age 11-13): mostly DAMA songs (portuguese band) but esp Luísa and Às vezes, they werent new songs at the time but we were crazy over them for no reason lmao, and ALSO I loved ariana grande so some of her songs as well

🚗roadtrip must have song: i dont know. I have no idea dude. im gonna say A minha casinha and Homem do Leme by Xutos e Pontapés bc I have distinct memories of listening to those in the car

🙈Guilty pleasure artist: Chico da tina. if any of you guys knew who he was id be bullied relentlessly but idgaf. his music may not be good but fuck do I love it

💯I know all the lyrics to: year zero, ritual, con clavi con dio, prime mover, all by ghost, probably some more but these are the ones that come to mind lol, the Damned by cos sylvan, not allowed, cigarettes out the window, song about me and The blonde by TV Girl, The Fall, Perfume and Sex sells by lovejoy + p much every Wilbur Soot song (LEAVE ME ALONE OKAY), almost every public void song (penelope scott album. again leave me alone), a bunch of Mariana and ashnikko songs, almost every single melanie martinez song, first love/late spring by mitski, literal legend by ayesha erotica, I can keep going

🤬A song to yell to: i dont know??? mr. self destruct by NIN?? I cant think of more I dont yell to music bc i cant scream at home 👍

❤️‍🔥 Current favourite music video: Ive always loved the square hammer mv, and also call me what you like by lovejoy is cool. OH AND THEIR COVER OF KNEE DEEP AT ATP I love that mv

🥰current favourite band: dude cmon now. thats so hard. its between ghost and radiohead but Ive also been getting into goth music esp sister of mercy lately and theyre great

🏟️Would kill to see them live/again: ghost obvs, Chico da Tina, brother his concerts are such a fucking vibe!!! rammstein, theyre coming here this summer and I want to go sooo bad

🏝️if you could listen to one song on repeat for the rest of your life: the Damned, woodcutters or night sculptor by cos sylvan I love all of those songs very very much

🔁stuck on repeat: climbing up the walls and my Iron lung by radiohead, absolution by ghost, and a bunch more that Ive already mentioned here

Tagging: @sphylor @owlghuleh @s01ar-3cl1ps3 @purple-moonglade @finch-does-stuff @everybodyshusband

[ooglywooglies]

i know that discourse thingy was some very ignorable shit, i think it normally would be but detox makes me stupid and moody so im gonna keep complaining (sorry)

but that particular thing of people just like assigning you a specific ideology and making assumptions about your beliefs based on that assignment that THEY made is so... why do we do that, and im clearly also guilty of it on some level considering i saw proship in that one persons bio and went oh that means they enjoy fiction that promotes harmful ideas (there is nuance to what proship can mean but generally i dont trust it bc i associate it with incest and pedophilia which i dont think are concepts one should be even exploring on a public space like the internet but im not against dark topics in fiction, explorative or otherwise)

like you wanna talk about food and animals with me, you assume im either a vegan or not a vegan, technically im not a vegan. technically im a weirdo whos very into the demystification of death in general (i could also go on about our obsession with corpse preservation/decay avoidance and how i think its bad and wrong) im a zoologist, i like hunting and fishing but not for sport, i dont eat beef as a choice (for multiple reasons i dont care to explain right now but none of them involve my feelings about the cow itself)

like truly we do not know each other why would you or i or anyone else be confident enough to make a debate out of any stray perspective you find. thats generally how i like to be on the internet is like, im just out here saying shit i dont expect anyone to respond, youre not invited to either. im not familiar with all the ways tumblr has changed in the past couple years but i swear people did not used to be able to find your posts if you did not tag them, but i guess its good that you can turn off reblogs now. like i know its on me to take some responsibility and make sure my void is really a void but i also dont feel like shit i post has ever screamed HEY YOU THERE SCROLLING THROUGH A TAG I DIDNT ACTUALLY ADD, IM TALKING TO YOU SPECIFICALLY, WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT ALL THIS

and no one has any way of knowing this because how could you but its not based on my assumptions about you but i hate strangers, so fucking much. theres not much that makes my blood boil more than someone talking to me when i have 0 familiarity with them, unless i asked for it i guess. like im an artist i have to grapple with that sometimes. if were not mutuals or ive never seen your name before im NEVER talking to you and i despise you for trying. it doesnt matter because its impossible to know this beforehand, but its still the case anyway.

okay my drowsey medicine kick't in hmmm maybe i get to takes a nap at 7 in the morning teehee

[antisocialgaycat]

feel free to ignore im kind of just screaming into the void here

so i love my friends right like theyre great people however there are some things that they do that kind of make me dislike them and i feel so bad abt it cos i love them but some of the shit they do makes me so uncomfy and i dont want to say anything cos what if they hate me for it and want to stop being friends with me and even though i know that they wont it still scares me lol but some of the shit they do makes me so uncomfy like some of them are hella transphobic and dont even realise it hell some of them say homophobic shit like in a joking way but it still kinda scares me also one of them uses autistic as an insult and that absolutely does not sit right with me and like this one isnt even that bad but they constantly refer to me as the gay one and they dont even seem to think of me as more than that sometimes also i have asked them a hundred times to call me lesbian instead of gay but nope im the gay one in the friend group and nothing will change that and that kind of doesnt vibe with me too good also theres this person who they keep referring to as my girlfriend or my wife and that absolutely is not okay with me and if asked them to stop so many times but they either cant or wont cos they keep calling her that and the thing is that the person they keep calling my wife is a really good friend of mine and we also have a lot of friends in common and i hang out w her and her friends a lot and whenever my friends see me with her they always take photos and shit which makes me so uncomfy i hate having photos taken of me and theyre also really unsubtle about calling her my girlfriend and shit when shes around and when her friends around and im so scared that either her or one of her friends will figure out that i like her and she'll be like ew thats mank and ill lose yet another friend and even tho i know thats so so unlikely cos shes a great person but it would at the very least make things awkward between us and i dont want that cos shes a good friend (better than my fg) so if my friends mess up that friendship i swear im gonna have no friends at all cos ill likely get pissed as fuck at them and my other friends will think im mentally fucked up and then i may as well just leave the entire fucking school and go to my local one and even though i know im catastrophising to the end of the earth and back it still doesnt take away from the fact that some of my friends are making me feel so uncomfy that i dont want to hang out w them even tho i love them also theres these two really toxic people in my grade who sometimes hang out with us (one more than the other) and theyve told the one whos not nice per se but less bad than the other one and hangs out with us less to fuck off and the homophobic transphobic bitch who uses so many slurs its not ok at all they seem to have no problem with oh and theres this kid in the year below us who always dabs up the rest of my fg but whenever he sees me he just says ew no ur a lesbian and one time he said that i prolly jerk off to furry porn and first of all what the actual fuck second of all that made me feel so uncomfy and third of all my fg just laughed and they still bring it up so often and they surely can tell it makes me feel so so fucking scared and i dont even fucking know why oh and one of my closest friends has the most terrible taste in guys like i swear she lies the most toxic people and im the only one who can actually see that cos all the others think theyre hot and they dont realise just how bad its gonna end every time theres literally only 2 people in that group who actually dont ever make me feel like my skeleton js gonna fucking scuttle out of my skin and crab walk to the nearest trash can and jump in so tysm to sarah (i aint gonna tag u cos i dont want u to see this post lmao im still gonna post it tho) and arkie (she doesnt even have tumblr and will never see this post but i still want to put it in writing) anyways yuh thats my lil vent

[dinosaurzzz]

Hi! Welcome to my account! I'm Dino, also known as the (self-proclaimed) CEO of XVials (Ink/XGaster)! I'm multiship but I don't talk about the other ones as much since XVials kind of runs my life.

My art account is @dynobitezzz and I post finished works there and sketches here; my art tag is 'dynobite art'

This is mostly a main/reblog account and I do tend to spam when I'm in a good mood about something I really like. Please be aware.

READ MY XVIALS ROYAL AU

JOIN MY XVIALS DISCORD SERVER

Here are some things about me:

PLEASE let me scream into the void about xvials. i won't bite, i promise. literally shoot me a message, tell me the most obscure thoughts you have on them, even ask questions about what i think on them!! i want it all. i need people to hear the xvials propaganda. these two goobers are so in love it HURTS that they aren't talked much more about, and i can give you a list of everything that has happened, and every concious decision jakei has made to develop their friendship. on top of that: i reocgnize their aroace identities and respect it VERY much. they are my lil guys. 🫶

i have a difficult time regulating my emotions and can come off as really rash and sensitive. it's not personal, i've just had a stressful(re: trauma-filled) life and my diagnoised ADHD and undiagnoised autism really go hand in hand. im also very bad at telling where a line may be crossed.

im kind of really dumb and big paragraphs, sentences, and words can short circuit my brain. english was something i used to be kind of good at but now i dont know whats going on with it. despite being a fanfic writer. so i may ask you to elaborate or word differently.

i AM 19yo and sometimes my work can become less than sfw. actual nsfw content is posted elsewhere.

im trans masc and bi/aroace(general term) and have a loving bf who i just adore! i go by he/it pronouns. <3

i used to powerlift competitively in highschool, my maxes are as follow; bench 140lb, squat 215lb, deadlift 240lb. i unfortunately couldnt get the last deadlift since its really strict about how you do things, but i could pick up the weight which meant more to me than some score. :]

im an aspiring video editor and im actually certified to use adobe premiere pro! i got the highest of my class with 920/1000 and im so proud of that !! <3 im obviously a beginner but ive edited tons of things before! Here's the proof because again. So. Proud.

I have several tags that I use that you can find and use below to navigate through my stuff. I believe most of them are self explanatory!

dinosaurzzz rambles is a general tag i use to talk about things, so reblogs, other posts, myself. just a lot of things. i dont ever tag reblogs btw so you won't get a cluttered screen!

Okay peace! Drink water, eat a snack, sleep well!

[edgelordfucker]

i don't write for fun i write because i'm compelled. don't even like it that much just gotta do it.

[roman-o-cheese]

Not my friends needing to tell me a relationship toxic because at this point I cant tell🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️

[bringingglory]

-

[localvoidwhumper-moved]

HELLO WHUMP COMMUNITY.

A GREMLIN IS FINALLY COMING OUT OF THEIR LITTLE CAVE AND THAT GREMLIN IS ME

so hi there and welcome to my INTRO POST!

(despite having tumbr for years, i still suck at post formatting so please bear with me dkdhj)

I'm a person of many names, but for the sake of brevity I'll give you three

feel free to call me Yeehaw, Void or Isaac, whichever you prefer

I go mainly by they/them

English isn't my first language so please be patient with the occasional grammatical mistakes jdldjdldjdkdh

This is my main, chaotic blog where I'll reblog and try to post whump along with lots of stuff about my ocs and some other things.

For a bit about me: I am a writer, an artist, and a long time fan of whump. Ever since i was a wee child i found great joy in brewing up dark scenarios in my little mind to hurt the fictional people i made. And so i continued and now, here we are.

ONTO THE CREATIVE INFO!

(and buckle your seatbelts, this will be a long ride)

My favorite tropes:

i adore anything to do with dehumanization, which is why pet whump is one of my favorites! Nonhuman characters are very much my bread and butter, be them whumpers, caretakers or whumpees. That brings us to vampires in specific. I love those. mwah perfect. i also love creepy and intimate whumpers ohooo yes.

i like to see my whumpees break. i like my whumpees terrified. i like watching the last shreds of hope be ripped away from them and see how they scream and cry because what did they do to deserve this? BUUT i also like a hardy defiant whumpee who instead of breaking, snaps. and oh the desire for revenge... delightful. i like many things dkhdkdjd

gore, torture, kidnapping, lab and medical whump, restraints, heavy conditioning, the "damned if you do damned if you don't" trope, illness whump, all of those are absolute FAVORITES of mine

when it comes to comfort, i like seeing the recovery process, eg: a heavily conditioned and traumatized whumpee slowly learning that life isn't all pain. oh yesssss. i enjoy comfort and specks of hope being granted just before overwhelming torture strikes. it's about the contrast

when it comes to squicks, i don't really have a need to list them. i simply Dont Look at what makes me too uncomfortable once i find it so as long as a work has its themes properly tagged, it's all fine and dandy :D

I have a fuckton of ocs. might just make a big ole post cataloging all of them and let people send in asks requesting an oc and a prompt, who knows!

I have many ideas but it's hard to organize them so expect random disorganized idea dumps every now and them (voidrambles? maybe)

I'll also post lots of art, mostly oc drawings and some whumpy ideas!

AND FEEL FREE TO SEND ME ASKS!!! i love interacting and i promise i dont bite im just shy

MAIN STORY:

My main wip still doesn't have a proper name so I've been calling it the "wolf and rabbit story". It's mostly a recovery story that takes place in a world where hybrids, humans with animal characteristics, are mistreated and oppressed by most governments at large, and as such often end up becoming pets (i still gotta organize this worldbuilding *sobs*). The story follows Aleksei, a wolf hybrid who escaped the system and is now a citizen, and Vincent, a pet rabbit hybrid who ran away from his old master and is now living as a stray. Well, was living as a stray, untill Aleksei found him bleeding on the streets and made the impulse decision to take the rabbit in. Features lots of caretaking and comfort and past trauma and that wip is my baby basically.

if you've read up until this point, thank you! now it's time to play tag

(if anyone tagged here wants me to remove the tag, please let me know)

here are the main blogs which inspired me to write whump and dive into this lovely community! they're all amazing and i recommend checking them out!

@just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi was the first whump blog i saw! Her Tool series just awoke something deep in my heart and i haven't stopped since

@whumpster-dumpster 's delightful prompts have carried me through many a writer's block!

@wumpzone was the blog which actually inspired me to start my wip! her stories are all worth checking out they're so good

@whumpsday 's kane and jim series is just UGH PERFECT it sparks so much joy all their blog sparks joy

and @whumpshaped is the one who gave me the last push i needed to finally post this! (thank you whumpshaped of the lake <3) its writing and drabbles are all perfect and amazing and i love it all (devil hot.... my beloved) go check it out!

and i think this is basically it, folks.

if there's anything i should change around for more clarity, please do tell

and thanks for listening to my whump intro!!

have a good earth rotation :D

[jangofctts]

Sink Your Teeth In (Part 2 of Are You In Or Out?)

Rated: Explicit (Paz is in the next chapter DONT WORRY)

Word count: 7.5k

Warnings: mentions of violence, blood, the cold?, reader is in PERIL YET AGAIN, vaginal fingering, oral female receiving, unprotected vaginal sex (wrap them schlongs yall), brief hand jobs, swearing, angst, very VERY light choking, din is a sub sorta?? bottom energy 

Summary: Well. At least you aren't dead. After a solo hunt gone wrong, you’re dumped in a cave on Csilla. Hopefully someone finds you before you freeze to death.  

a/n: hey…so uh. HOW ABOUT THAT EPISODE HUH?!? aheM anyway--yall I just wanna thank everyone first off for all the love and support!!! I see all of your comments and tags and AH IM SO LUCKY TO HAVE ALL OF YOU GUYS. ALSO SPECIAL SHOUTOUT TO @djxrxn​ THIS WOULDNT HAVE BEEN DONE WITHOUT YOU BB GORL

Well—

Here you are. 

Taken by surprise by another bounty, further proving how irrevocably incompetent you are at this line of work. You blame the binders. An older, clunkier model—easy to pick if you’re clever enough and yes. Maybe you should’ve asked to borrow a carbonite chamber, but hey—where’s the fun in that? 

Not much, as it so happens. 

Your feet had been kicked up on the dashboard, dozing and unaware of the freed bounty creeping up behind the pilot’s seat. Something delightfully blunt smashed against your temple, jolting you into a brief conscious state where the only thing you could think before passing out again, was a resounding— 

Oh, fuck me sideways with a fucking lightsaber—

The rest is hazy. A blur of colors and the fuzzy shapes of your bounty’s face sneering in amusement when she bound your wrists and ankles and left you in the cargo hold. Vaguely you recall your ship being commandeered, swung into an unidentified atmosphere and landing on said unknown planet Or planets. Planet hopping to cover up a trail. 

The bitter cold, sharper than a needle through skin is what shook off the last dregs of unconsciousness. The bounty’s hand was hooked into the collar of your clothes, dragging your limp body through drifts of snow and ice. You would’ve fought back—should’ve even though each extremity felt like a numb block of lead. Not very useful in a fight…

Soon, the snow turned to mud and the mud to stone as a mouth of a cave slid over the impossibly blue sky. Dumped in a cave, and left to die—perfect way to bite the dust. Your bounty turned captor lands a sharp kick to your ribs, mouthing some curse in a language you don’t understand, and left without a second thought. 

Seems about right. You have a knack for lying helpless and half dead in places you ought not to be in. 

Two days and counting, you’ve been holed up in this blasted cave with no food, no supplies and no comlink. It’s going be a fucking chore to find you—nearly impossible. You’re lucky in that aspect you guess—you know enough bounty hunters to sniff out a a needle in a whole stack of needles, so all it is is a race of time against the elements and how long it takes for one of them to notice.            

Aeris is no help. He left a day before you had—hired as personal protection for some syndicate leader halfway across the galaxy. Ives is in a similar boat, off-world and unavailable to drag your ass out of the hole you’ve dug. Which leaves…

You sigh and pinch the bridge of your nose between your forefinger and thumb. Anytime you even think of those two a migraine cumulates behind your eyes. It’s…it’s not like anything bad happened in the aftermath—there’s been no fallout or arguments with barbed words as weapons. It’s been quiet. Like stepping onto a sheet of cracked transparisteel in a library full of tight-lipped academics. 

The questions lurk under the surface of every conversation and longing look cast your way. You’ll need to clarify and sort things out eventually, but fuck—it’s such a mess of frazzled heartstrings and fine strands of impossible thoughts that lead into an endless void of doubt. You’re shoving that emotional time bomb to the very back of your mind—everything is still so raw…  

So you ran. 

Picked up any and all jobs that the Guild provided just to escape the looming decision of confronting a certain pair of Mandalorians. That and with them having their own tasks to complete, it was rare to see them, let alone together in the past few weeks. A simple run in here and there in the halls of the Covert, but you were too busy to stop and chat—forced a chaotic schedule upon yourself as an excuse to avoid staying in once place at a time.    

Coward.

The word knots in your stomach like gnarled tree roots escaping their prison of dark soil on untrodden land.  

Maker—how did everything become so tangled? 

You draw your knees up to your chest and release a long, drawn out exhale that echoes through the cave. You sniff and force the swell of tears that prick at your eyes away. You’re pretty sure they’ll freeze and you’re not hoping to find out. 

The only good thing about being dropped on this Maker-forsaken, wasteland devoid of anything but snow, is the free ice for the nasty gash on your forehead. A nice little parting gift. 

It’s shallow…you think—it stopped bleeding the night before and is now just a scabbed over, tender wound that throbs whenever you move your head too fast. Concussion maybe—a mild one.  

Maker willing when someone finds your sorry ass they’ll have bacta. Or a blanket. Either would be peachy.     

Sitting up with a wince, you shuffle to the mouth of the cave for the thousandth time and scour the skyline for a familiar ship. Or, any ship really. The only thing you do see is a lonesome wisp of cloud against the grayish blue sky much to your chagrin. You scowl and stalk back into your little hovel and slump back onto the ground. 

The hours drag on, the watery light of the dying sun barely doing anything to warm you. Sulking is hardly what you should be doing—not great for the burdened mind and all that, but ah, it’s so fun to wallow in misery. You curl your knees up to your chest and you must slip into a doze because when you’re snapped back into the present, footsteps punch through the frozen tundra outside your cave.  

Adrenaline crackles down your spine—the bounty changed her mind. Ultimately decided she’d be safer in the long run with you dead. Fine.

If this is where your grave is going to be, might as well get in one or two punches. What’s another black eye anyway?

A shadow flickers at the mouth of the cave, curling around the wall as she draws closer. A brown boot kicks through the snow and— 

“Changed your mind? I—“

Your words die on your tongue as relief floods your veins. Din Djarin stands before you, a sight for sore eyes in these trying times. 

Frost glitters on the burgundy chest plate, glinting in the dim sunlight that touches the mouth of the cave. A delicate feathering of the dainty crystals that no high end lace maker could ever hope to mimic curls up the front of Din’s visor and eats away at the edges of his cloak. His heavy step forward reverberates off the walls, some of that ease replaced by the prickle of dread. His silence is unnerving. 

“Din,” you say again, just so he’ll say something. “I can—“

You move to stand, but he interrupts with a halting;

“Sit.”       

Your mouth snaps shut and you drop back on the floor. This…is not good. His footsteps are heavy as he approaches you and every muscle in your frame tightens like a fist wrapping around your ribcage and squeezing. The precise edges of his helmet are not a forgiving sight and even when he kneels onto one knee you have to resist the natural urge to flinch. Like this, despite hunching over, Din is broad. All hard muscle and sinew amplified by the bulky layer of beskar.   

Your tongue runs over the insides of your teeth as you track his hand that he thrusts foreword. You hiss and jerk away at the sudden needly pain when his gloved thumb finds the edges of your head wound. A low sound of disapproval filters out through the helmet in a low metallic buzz. 

“You won’t need stitches,” he says. Din reaches into one of his various supply pouches and pulls out a tiny vile of bacta. He casually pulls off his right glove, unscrews the vile and smears the bacta over his thumb. This time you don’t make a sound, even though your nerves scream at the razor like sensation of his thumb working the bacta into the damaged flesh. He doesn’t ask how the injury happened and you don’t care to tell him. There’s a time and place for stories about battle scars and near misses—it’s much too fresh to be spoken of right now. 

The brief torture finally ends after once last glance over for other presenting injuries. He finds none, replaces his glove and stands with a muted grunt. You know what’s next. You’d rather avoid it—you aren’t keen on the berating lectures—as deserved as they are.      

“I found your ship on Sato 3,” Din begins with a growl. “Imagine my surprise when I found your bounty selling it for parts.”  

Ah, there it is. You wince and study your fingernails. “Pile of junk anyway…”

“I thought you’d be smarter about these things,” he snarls, his sharp tone deadly enough to slice through bone. “Was the hole blown into your lung not enough for you?”

You swallow and bite your tongue.  

The bristling Mandalorian, continues and jabs an orange tipped finger at you. “You are reckless.”

Your chest constricts as you look away, shame blooming in the pit of your stomach.This is a new facet of Din you’ve never encountered. You aren’t naïve—even the most docile of people can harbor a temper, you know that. And you know Din is by no means passive—he’s an elite warrior equipped with a small arsenal at his disposal. You don’t expect him to coddle you or treat you different than any other companion; but…but it’s hard not to take his ire to heart. Not when it’s the kind of anger that boils deep in your chest and erupts with molten streams that leaves scathing wounds and blistered feelings.  

You chew your lip hard enough to taste blood and avoid his piercing gaze. You think if you do you might catch fire and burn to a crisp. “I’m sorry.”   

The meek apology settles in the air like a heavy fog. Din’s anger still brews, looming and dark but he reigns in his temper and switches out the searing cadence of his words with chilly informality. You’re not sure which is worse.   

“No more bounties.” 

“What?” Your brows knit together. The fuck does he mean.  

“No more hunts alone—“  

You interrupt with a scoff. “You’re grounding me?”

He strides across the small space and plants himself on the opposing wall. “Until you’re competent enough, you have no business being out in the field. You might as well be bait at this point.” 

“Competent.” You echo through clenched teeth.  

His helmet dips, leveling a steady glare of indifference. “The Crest is a half cycle’s walk from here. In the morning I’m taking you back to Nevarro.”   

“I’m not a child. You can’t just,” you throw your hands up in dismay, “ban me from bounty hunting.”    

Din’s armor clinks together as he moves to sit. He rests one elbow on his propped up knee, extends his other and rolls his helmet to meet your eyes. “Your actions reflect the Covert now. We can’t risk discovery because of one stupid mistake or a careless loose end.”    

That hadn’t even crossed your mind. Stars, you want to smack yourself. Your ship, as shitty as it was, hosted a good chunk of sensitive information, all encrypted and translated into binary. A mediocre slicer could hack through it in hours. Not exactly foolproof but hey, at least you had something. Good thing your bounty wasn’t in the market of selling stolen ships to the Empire. 

“Din?”

The Mandalorian makes no noise of affirmation that he heard you. You sigh and take his silence as a go ahead and clear your throat. “How long was I gone for?”

Here, in the cave it’s been nearly three days, but the rest of it you’re not exactly sure. Hunting the bounty down took up at least a week or two and even longer to capture her and there’s no accounting for the time lost after your ship was commandeered. Your teeth roll over your bottom lip as you wait for him to respond. 

“Almost two months.” He replies evenly. “Your transmissions were cut three weeks ago and I didn’t think anything of it. Comms are always patchy in Wild Space."

Leather creaks as his fist balls at his side. “You didn’t answer for days. Paz and I tracked the ship to Sato 3, but you weren’t there. Do you know how difficult it was to pick through all the planets recorded on your log?”

You blink and return to picking at your fingernails. 

“You weren’t easy to find, I—“ He severs the rest of his sentence with a crackling sigh and tilts his head back. “You’re lucky.”    

The hesitance lacing his words makes you bite your tongue, the snarky retort crumbling to ash in your mouth. Din doesn’t bother to filter his words—he’s blunt. Efficient and to the point when he does decide to speak. That…well that was different.   

He was worried—

You rub at your cheek—numb with the cold and curl into yourself. Din was worried. Easily the most feared bounty hunter in the parsec, worried that he couldn’t find you.   

A different cold—one that settles deep into the marrow of your bones and hugs your soul with a sheet of frost, makes a home in your heart. The severity of what could’ve happened replaces that sheen of hilarity and fuck. You were closer to freezing to death than Din finding you here—alone in some stupid kriffing cave.  

Somehow the idea of that is worse than the brief brush of eternal slumber you had on Nar Shaddaa. Up to that point you expected to die young—no harm and no foul in it either. You had no attachments, no debt to pay—a drifter in an endless galaxy.    

Now you’re here, buckling under the weight of mismanaged friendships and your uncanny skill at weaseling into any and all trouble. 

Neither you or Din jump to fill the silence. The ashes of disaster settle in nicely with the frozen echo of an endless winter.      

It’d been a couple hours shy from sunset when Din arrived, the sun providing weak light that hardly touched the mouth of the cave. Now as the shadows grow longer and with the temperature dropping, the two of you are swallowed up by the unyielding darkness of night. 

Din shuffles and fishes out the solar light from his supply bag. It clicks on and warm, orange light illuminates the cave. It bounces off his beskar, fracturing the light like a million tiny suns in the tempered metal and in the impossibly dark visor. He looks up, and tosses the light over. 

You catch it easily and despite the warmness of the light it emits, it offers no heat for your chilled fingers. You set it to the side and tuck your hands into your armpits. 

By no means is the cave warm—the natural thermal vents kept the ground dry and free of the ice and snow that rages outside, but it doesn’t protect you from the occasion chilly draft that cuts through each layer you wear. Then again, you weren’t planning on taking an unexpected vacation on Csilla. No time to plan really.  

You sigh and pull your knees up to your chest and cast a glance at your ever radiant ray of sunshine across from you.  

He looks nice and cozy—leaned back against the cave wall, one leg crossed over the other while his hands sit intertwined just below his navel. The beskar must provide insulation—maybe a fancy heater in that bucket of his, or maybe he’s just too stubborn to show anything other than indifference.   

Another bout of shivers tear through your frame and you’re certain Din can hear the enamel of your teeth clack together. You shove your hands deeper into your armpits and tuck your chin into your chest to preserve heat and pray that sleep isn’t far off—can’t be cold if you’re unconscious.    

Metal scrapes over stone as Din readjusts himself and you can feel him looking at you. It’s not a terrible weight to bear; intense and analytic, sure and in the past it would’ve unnerved you. Now, instead of it feeling like he were peeling back each fibre of your soul each time he stares, it’s familiar. A pattern of sorts—

It happens each time Din wrestles with an uncertain question. He deals in absolutes, and it’s no surprise he rarely knows what to say to you. 

“You’re shivering,” he states. You roll your eyes. “Are you cold?”

“Boiling, actually,” you snip. “Why else would I forget a jacket?”

A sharp hiss of air crackles through the vocoder. “Don’t get mouthy with me. It was a simple question.”

“Well—there’s not much to do about it,” you sneer, watching your breath condensate in the air. “I’m freezing, exhausted, and hungry.”       

You know you’re being snide—but your nerves feel like they’ve been severed at the root with a dull vibroblade. You have neither the time nor energy to spare for simple questions. Din should understand that—seeing as he’s a man familiar with short temperament.

The space between you is ripe with crackling tension, and maybe—if you weren’t so fucking cold—you’d play the mediator. Thread stitches into the gash you both sliced into your friendship, as small it may be. You’ve lost friends over less—this could end up no different.

You sigh and turn your head. This is a problem for tomorrow. 

Irritated and upset, you squeeze your eyes shut and chase after sleep. You slip in a doze faster than expected, any and all discomfort fading away a you toe the line between a deeper sleep and waking dreams. You think you imagined Din saying your name—Maker you can’t even escape him in your own fucking head—  

It doesn’t end—like a nagging buzz that swells until it’s right near your ear. Spite spurs you to ignore It and exhaustion convinces you to drift further away. That is, until a hand, gentle and warm curls around your shoulder. You once again hear your name rumble low through Din’s helmet, but it’s much too difficult to open your eyes. Why can’t he leave you be? You barely feel the cold now…

“Stay awake.” Din sounds distant, in some other plane of existence despite the steady hold he has on your arm. “Maker—you’re colder than kriffing ice.” 

“Go away,” you grumble through numb lips. Such a pest.  

He’s talking—but the words don’t make sense. Muddled—split between that hazy line of dreaming and consciousness where you can’t decipher what’s real. His hands however—you can feel those plain as day. A bare palm cups your cheek—shreds through the layer of frost you’re positive has crystalized over your skin and rouses you to a more coherent level of presentness.       

“Don’t quit on me yet—“

“Nah,” you mumble. “I’m hard to…to kill. L-like a scrap rat…”  

Din grunts in response. “Rat is a compliment. You’re more of a spider-roach.”

The ends of your mouth quirk. It’s the best you can do—a full smile just might push you to the brink of death.        

“C’mon—I won’t let either of us freeze,” Din sighs. His fingers find the magnetized latches on his cuirass and it slips off with practiced ease, the armored thigh plating following a moment later. He neatly sets it to the side and grabs his cloak to fasten it around you. With another sigh, Din shuffles in behind you and wraps an arm around your middle, nestling his legs and body snuggly around yours.   

Maker—you don’t have time to bother about the intimacy of this because all you’re drawn to is the furnace like heat. Fuck, he’s so warm. You have only a second to enjoy it before your body begins to thaw—bringing forth waves of achey pain.   

His chest molds to your back, both arms curling over your own arms that are scrunched up tight around your chest. You shake in his hold, vicious waves of cold clashing against his body heat—it hurts—like sticking your bare foot into hot coals.     

You squirm, little gasps of discomfort slipping out that echo around the cave. Din shifts, tucking you further under his body until he’s nearly crushing you. It’s a bit tricky to breathe like this but hey—you’re not complaining. Not when your nose is buried in his soft undershirt that smells purely of Din.   

Your fingers and toes still throb as they thaw, but it’s working. Cuddling Din Djarin to stave off hypothermia—sounds kriffing ridiculous. 

“You’re still shivering,” he says. “I might…”

Your breath catches in your throat as he trails off. “Might what?”

Another shiver wracks through your body as his frosty helmet catches on bare skin when he dips his head in embarrassment. You don’t quite catch what he says and he doesn’t bother to clarify. “Forget it.”  

You turn your head as much as you can, straining your eyes to meet the strip of visor. “Tell me.”

He mumbles under his breath again and cuddles closer, slotting his hips against your ass. “Might know…know another way to keep us warm…”

Oh. 

A spark breathes to life in the pit of your tummy. You wiggle onto your back, your nose brushing the vizor. “Does it involve me taking off my pants?” 

Din huffs, his hands, previously latched onto your hips, starting to crawl up your waist. “It could…”    

You smirk and rock your hips back, eliciting a low growl that rumbles through his chest. With your whine of approval, Din’s hand slips between your legs and gives the meat of your inner thigh a squeeze. You let your knees fall open as far as they can in this position and it’s all Din needs to cup your cunt through the thin material of your trousers. 

Crackling pleasure flood your veins as the heel of his palm grinds into your clit, and while the pressure is nice, it does nothing to satisfy. Only feeds the growing flames of desire with brittle kindling. 

You pull at his undershirt and whimper, thrilled once his deft fingers, calloused and thick unlace your pants and yank far enough down to fit his hand. His fingers trace your outer lips, a ghost of a touch as arousal swells in your stomach. He parts your folds once your wetness begins to dribble out and coats his fingertips with your arousal. 

Stars—you need him. You arch into him and whine. “Touch me. Din, please—“ 

You jerk as Din’s thumb swirls a slow circle over your clit, a rush of endorphins surging out like unrefined fire whiskey. Din’s head tilts to watch you writhe over his fingers and the sudden chill of his helmet touching the inside of your flushed neck steals away your next inhale. Goosebumps race down your entire being, adding to the influx of your excitement that pools in your lower belly.       

Your hands tangle into his undershirt, pulling him closer until you can’t find where he begins and you end. His heart pounds in his chest, thrumming to the dance of your own heart that yearns to break free from your ribcage. Your breath catches when two of his thick fingers tease at your entrance. Your walls flutter around him as the slip in easily.   

His fingers roll forward and stroke against something devastating inside of you, and he when his palm rolls back, it bumps against your clit with that divine firmness you need. Your cunt tightens around the two digits as they curl.  

“Fuck. Can you hear yourself?” He pants, groping your breast to elicit a high pitched wail. “You always make—make such pretty noises.” 

Butterflies erupt in your stomach at his words and fuck. You’re already dipping head first into release. A moment later you’re arching into his chest as every muscle stiffens in a crescendo of bliss, your stuttered breathing harsh even to your own ears.  

Your quick pants fog up his visor as Din rests the crown of his helmet on your forehead, the metal a cool relief to your flushed skin. He slips his fingers out of your dripping cunt, your chest still heaving with exertion as the last strands of your high fizzle and ebb away. Din shifts and and snakes his fingers, still shiny and wet with your arousal, beneath the lip of his helmet and sucks them clean with an appreciative groan.  

“Fuck—“ You breathe, pushing your face into his hand as he cups your cheek. Din’s thumb brushes over your cheekbone and swings his leg over your hips to hoist himself over you. 

“Do you remember...” He starts, his voice buzzing through the vocoder. His fingers tickle down your cheek and trace the parted outline of your lips. “When you let me taste you?”

You nod, and it’s all you’re able to do. You’re not even sure you can formulate words, let alone voice them right now. 

Din’s thumb pulls at your plush bottom lip, and you can’t help but slide your tongue along the digit. He grunts and slips his thumb into the wet heat of your mouth. “I think about you every night…how you came on my tongue—”

Your stomach flips as a rush of arousal sweeps through your tummy. You groan and you’re half sure you’re gonna dissipate into the floor from how hot your cheeks burn. “Din—"  

He continues without missing a beat. 

“You were so fucking wet for me—dripped all over my hand,” he murmurs, nuzzling his helmet, still chilly and frosted over, into the crook of you neck.  “I want to do it again—can I?”

You’re nodding before he even finishes his sentence. He wasn’t the only one longing for his head between your thighs on those long nights apart. Remembering those plush lips and addictive touches could only get you so far and well—he’s here now. You said it once and you’ll say it again—there’s no chance in hell you’d be passing up this opportunity. 

Din lifts his head and as you watch the light glitter in the reflection of the beskar, a sudden stray thought ricochets into the forefront of your mind. “Din, the light—your helmet.”

He pauses, his body tensing as he mulls over his options. “It’s—I—it’s ok…It’ll be ok.”

Din inhales a stuttered breath and casts a brief glance over his shoulder. It’s a dim light, kicked into the corner and laying on its side. From this angle, his face would be partially obscured in shadow…but still. There are easier ways to go about this. Ways that don’t risk jeopardizing the very foundation of who he is—what he stands for and what he so devoutly follows.    

To say you know anything about his religion is laughable. Everything you know can fit on the back of a thumbtack and even still, you’re sure that half of that is still based upon rumor and speculation. But this—what Din is hinting at, you know is not something to be taken lightly. 

He’s stripping his soul bare for you—allowing you to glimpse at that bleeding heart of his he guards so securely within layers of flesh and bone and impenetrable beskar. Din is gifting you his trust and there’s no where else to put it except for the space beneath your breast bone.   

Yet, even still—this could mean nothing at all. You have no way to know the exact magnitude of what this means to him. If he’s alright with this, who are you to question?

He mumbles one last thing about the light and sits up. Goosebumps rush up your bare skin at the loss of the heavy warmth of his body. You whine and curl up closer to his legs, greedy for any spare iota of heat like you’ve been denied it your entire life.   

Maker you hate this fucking planet—   

Your attention snaps back to Din when he makes a noise of uncertainty. His hands are cupped around his helmet—hesitant, nervous and you suspect if Din’s hands weren’t plastered so tight around the metal, he’d be shaking. You chew on your lip and prop yourself up. 

Cautiously, so as not to startle, you reach up and curl your fingers around his wrist. You can feel his pulse thrumming through his veins—alive, flesh and bone like you. Not some heap of sentient metal built for the horrors of war. You don’t know why you do it—just seems right to pull the fragile and vulnerable skin of his inner wrist to you mouth. You plant a gentle kiss there and smile when he cups your cheek.           

“You don’t owe me anything, Din,” you say, staring into the darkened depths of his visor. “Least of all this.”    

Some of that tension held in Din’s shoulders melts. He utters something in that clipped language of his people, and the only thing you can make out is your name. He lurches foreword and fuck—you’re terrified for a split second he’s gonna cave your skull in but instead he lightly bumps the crown of his helmet over your forehead.      

“I want to. For you—only you.”

Din doesn’t leave any time to unpack all of that. He sits up again, wraps his hands around the beskar— 

The metallic thunk of the helmet reverberates through the cave like a crack of thunder.    

You were right. 

You can barely see his face—if you really look, you can see the murky outline of his nose, dark hair and a sliver of his tan skin that the light touches. Attractive—but you knew that already. You touch his cheek and smile, your thumb catching over wiry facial hair and soft skin. Din makes a sound low in his throat and pushes his cheek into your hand. 

“I still want to taste you,” Din says, his voice richer when stripped of that tinny vocoder. You like listening to him speak without it, you think, and it’s a damn shame you never get to hear it. “Please.”     

Before he can escape and fulfill that fantasy, you yank him into a blinding kiss. He kisses the same—all wild edges and with desperation lining each motion—but there’s a new found tenderness here. Like he’s savoring each gasp and every brush of skin you grace him with like it’s your last night left in the galaxy.   

He breaks away from your mouth and peppers kisses and nips down your jaw, then lower as you arch and expose the bare skin of your throat. There’ll be a plethora of bruises tomorrow, and with no hope to cover them either but fuck it—Din can leave as many hickeys and teeth marks as he wants. 

If not for the cold still latching onto your very soul, you’d ditch the shirt; give Din better access instead of him needing to shove a hand up under and grope at your breasts. He gives the fabric an annoyed tug, but it’s fruitless. There’s no use when there’s better things to be sought. 

He shoves your shirt as far up as it goes, shivering as he mouths down your stomach, licks around your bellybutton and sucks a bruise onto your hipbone. Your pants are already pulled halfway down—one sharp yank and they’re around your ankles and off in the next breath. 

Cupping your knees with both hands he gingerly spreads your legs and drapes them over his muscular shoulders. Din rubs his patchy haired cheek along your thigh and hooks his hands under your ass, his ivory white teeth catching the light as he smiles.  

“Fucking perfect—“ He groans, planting his lips over your inner thigh. His tongue swipes a wet line up, stopping just before your aching cunt to dig his teeth into the sensitive flesh. You jump at the burst of pain and shoot a hand down, tangling your fingers into the soft curls atop his head.  

Din grunts and jumps to your other thigh, leaving no inch of skin neglected and without evidence of his teeth and lips. By the time his thumbs touch the outer lips of your cunt, the aching need for him is burning you from the outside in. He has to still your twitching hips with a calloused palm, and only after you settle does he surge forward. 

His tongue meets your swollen clit, ripping a tangled cry from you vocal cords. He’s just as eager as the first time he tasted you, if not more—every action backed by needy abandon. He sucks at the bundle of nerves then sweeps his tongue lower. Din’s thumbs part your lower lips as he runs his tongue though your soaked folds, the tip of his nose bumping against your clit that send delicious sparks throughout your whole body. Little noises and breathy gasps fill the cave, encouraging Din to push his tongue deep into your aching entrance. 

Your hand fists into his hair as your hips stutter and rock into the searing heat of his mouth. The noises you make are obscene, and Din is no better. Each pass of his tongue over your pussy is matched with his own deep moans that vibrated against your clit. Fucking hell he’s devouring you alive.          

Your orgasm sneaks up on you, robs you blind and crashes over you in deep waves that drag you out to sea and never to be found again as you spill onto his greedy tongue. Your fingers are threaded tight in his hair as you squeak and press harder into his mouth, riding out your pleasure until it shifts and becomes raw and sore.  

Din doesn’t pause for even a second—all too happy to stay put between your thighs for eternity. Your legs are trembling when you force his head away, a nice, tingly warmth settling into your limbs 

A dark thrill rushes down your spine when he looks up, wild hair and mouth covered in your slick. If not for the low lighting you imagine his eyes would be glazed over and Maker you want him again. Din swoops down and presses his mouth to yours, the taste of yourself heavy on his tongue that slips past the seem of your lips. 

You whine after he breaks away and sits up—an opportunity for your eyes to roam down his body. He’s still got his trousers on, a considerable bulge tenting the front. With a smirk you reach up and grab a handful, delighting in Din’s startled grunt. “Easy.”

You flash him a wry smile and give his clothed cock a playful squeeze. “Take them off.” 

Din huffs and pulls at the drawstrings. “Needy.”

He says it with no bite and no coquettish retort on your end springs to mind—especially when his thumbs hook into the waistband and pull. A slow reveal of sun-kissed skin and a sparse happy trail that your eyes eagerly drink up. 

Din’s cock bobs as his trousers fall around his knees, tip shiny and wet and curling towards his navel. You bite the inside of your cheek and reach out, a rush of arousal pulsing through your core at Din’s low moan. He’s heavy in your hand, deliciously thick and throbbing—and all of it for you. 

Din gasps out your name as you lightly squeeze and stroke down, your pace dreadfully slow and teasing. Who knows when you’ll get another chance like this—a Mandalorian willingly on their knees for you.           

Your other hand slips up his chest as you stroke him, intent on grabbing a handful of his thick hair that curls softly against the column of his neck. Your fingernail lightly scrapes across his nipple and he sways, pitching forward before he catches himself and straightens. Din’s eyes are squeezed tight, chest heaving with shallow pants as a smirk tugs at your lips. 

“It’s ok, Din,” you whisper. “I won’t break.” 

Your fingers twist into the hair at the base of his skull and guide him back. He slumps forward with a sweet moan, laying his weight onto your body that you’re all too happy too bare. His nose is nestled into the slope of your neck as his hands lock around the dip of your lower back while the other cradles the back of your head, drawing you into a loose semblance of a hug. 

Something snaps and crumbles deep in your soul that bleeds the heartstring blues, humming with broken chords in the presence of Din’s soft fragility. Your hand moves from between his legs to instead wrap around the wide expanse of his back, squeezing him tight to your chest. You hold each other like there isn’t tomorrow to look forward to and you wonder if this is how it feels to fall apart. Two spinning halves of a supernova torn apart and destined to collide and shatter into a million fragments of dazzling light.  

Yes, you’re scared he might blind you or burn you with his brilliance, but you can’t look away.      

Your fingers crawl up his muscled thigh and settle on his hip. “Lie down for me?”

There’s no hint of hesitation or complaint as he maneuvers himself onto his back, patiently allowing you to clamber over his legs and straddle his hips. His cock rests on your inner thigh, pulsing and leaving a dribble of wetness every time it twitches.    

“Good boy.” It’s subtle but it ripples out like a heavy stone thrown into a still lake. Din shudders and says your name in a cracked whisper. He rolls his hips, both of you groaning at the sensation of his cock running along your dripping center.     

Another time for that game maybe. 

Your desperation is running hot and wild to have him inside you and you know he’s in a similar boat. You grab the thick shaft of his cock and grind the tip of him through your lips, breath hitching when it extracts such a perfect moan from the man below you. 

“Ride me,” he pleads, clamping his large hands over your hips. “Fuck—I need you.” 

How can you deny such a request?

You line the wide head up with your aching center and slowly work him in. Shivers wrack through you, and Maker—he’s splitting you apart, molding your insides to the shape of him. Beads of sweat dot your hairline by the time you’re seated fully on his member, the both of you pushed even closer towards madness.  

Din squeezes your ass and props his knees up, rolling his hips up into you. You whimper and tip forward, propping your palms over his chest as he sets the pace. You may be on top but there’s no changing the bold colors of power and lust that cloud his mind, fueling the brutal movements of fucking up into you. Your thighs burn already and Maker—why the fuck are you already tired? You’re not doing any of the work.  

Quicker than lightning, Din curls forward and manhandles you onto your back. You squeak as he grips your thigh and yanks it around his narrow hips, thrusting in deeper. His right hand crawls up the front of your shirt and wraps his fingers around your throat in a loose hold. His thumb hovers over the dip at the base of your neck but he makes no move to press down—just allows the weight of his palm to do the work. And fuck—it works. 

Choked garbles of his name pass through your lips as you buck and squirm in his hold, feeling your arousal begin to drip down the back of your thighs. You’re skirting the edge of sizzling release that alights your nerves with liquid wildfire. Your nails harpoon into the meat of his shoulders as your eyes squeeze shut. Din won’t allow it.      

“Look at me,” Din snarls, yanking your head back by your hair. “I want to—to watch you cum for me.” 

A blush scalds your cheeks but you listen. Your eyes flutter open for him, sliding to the dark shadows of his eyes that sweep you into their own gravity well with no hope to escape. You don’t mind. 

“You’re so g-good for me—always so perfect.”

White hot light bursts behind your eyelids, and that’s all it takes. Your body seizes, your cunt squeezing impossibly tight around his cock as you cum. This one is different—steals your breath away and leaves you a broken husk of a person lost in most delectable forms of agony and pleasure. The cry of his name pierces the air only spurring the Mandalorian into a jarring pace to seek his own peak of ecstasy.  

Din’s nose nuzzles into your neck, his pants hot and sharp against your flushed skin. “You f-feel so—fuck. Say—say my name.”

You leap to his request and with a playful nip to his earlobe, you whisper it to him with the sweetness of starcherrries and the promise of better things. 

He tips over the edge, his hips faltering into no discernible pace as he cums. Din buries his teeth into the skin below your jaw, a mess of whines and begging gasps of nonsense as he fills your cunt to the brim. 

Your harsh breathing mingles as you both lazily slip down from your high. He rests his head over your sternum, listening to your beating heart that drums in a wild staccato as your fingers carefully comb through his hair. If not for the ache in your hips you’d keep him here forever. Din pulls out and you both groan at the loss. 

He doesn’t completely move away and you’re glad for it. He brushes his knuckles down the expanse of your cheek and dots a tender kiss to your hairline. Your name rumbles low in his throat as he shifts lower and gives your ear lobe a playful nip. His stubble scrapes along your neck, and you can’t help but giggle and squirm—but the weight of his body keeps you pinned. Your name slips from his lips a second time, breathy and drawn out in a sweet sigh, like he’s savoring the sound of each syllable and roll of the tongue. 

Din lifts his head, only slightly—near enough that his nose bumps into yours and his lips scrape along yours that are still parted and wet. “I—can I tell you something?” 

You cup his cheek and steal a kiss. It’s supposed to be quick—but instead he leans into it, guiding your mouth into a slow dance of sticky sweet movements that are caught in a slow draw, like crystalized honey abandoned in a glass jar. You’re enraptured by his touch—his skin mottled with scars yet somehow still unfairly soft. He smells of snow—like metal and soap and something gentler, that’s uniquely Din.            

Fuck—you can feel your mind slipping away, wrapped up so snugly in his presence you almost forget to answer. “Yeah—anything.”

Crackling static suddenly rips through the cave, startling you both. A distorted voice chatters on the comlink that lies forgotten beside your pants. It blinks and the transmission ends just as abruptly. With a sigh Din brushes it off and tilts his head to tempt you into another kiss but—

Whoever’s trying to patch through is persistent. 

His lip curls in a scowl and snatches the comm. “Jorhaa’ir.”

You only catch your name being mentioned twice as rapid Mando’a is exchanged. Aeris maybe judging by the tone, but no that’s not right.   

“Wait—is that Paz?”

The muscles in Din’s shoulders tense, confirming your suspicion.

“Is everything ok?” Din doesn’t resist you when you pry the comlink out of his fingers and patch in. “Paz?”

Your heart skips a beat. 

“There you are,” the comlink crackles and you smile. “You’re a pain in my ass, you know that?” 

Stars—you didn’t think you’d miss hearing Paz’s voice. Your chest aches. 

The conversation is short, he asks you how you are and when you’re coming home and in the time it takes to answer, Din is peeling himself from your body. While you're distracted, he pulls on his pants and sits at the edges of your vision.

You both pretend when you say goodnight to Paz, return the comlink and crawl into his arms that nothing has festered with savage detachment. You don't remember to ask him what he was going to say and he lets you forget. The golden heart that bleeds molten ichor slips from your sight and becomes shut behind walls of beskar and bushes of thick thorns and overgrown ivy.         

He still holds you, but it’s the coldest you’ve ever been. 

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