#i don't want to get my hopes up. but also i very much do | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

mtcloudsworld · 21 hours ago

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Hi, I asked you a few days ago if you take requests I was too scared to bother you by sending an actual request. But would you do a Valentine’s Day smut/fluff for Jason x fem reader. Jason actually being super Sweet and romantic and spoiling her on Valentine’s Day, I know it’s late you don’t have to if you don’t want and thank you for responding to my question a few days ago 🤎🤎🤎

Awe please bother me!! 🥺

I really don't mind if you guys inbox me. If you have a request, wanna say hi or have a question, please don't be afraid to message me! I'm all ears 😁👍🏾

Sorry it took me so long to respond. It took me some time to muster up your request. I hope you didn't think I was ignoring you or anything. I did have something in my drafts and was having a hard time articulating the way I wanted it to go. Luckily your request came in clutch, I appreciate that very much.

I feel like my brain was going into a hundred different directions with this one 😂 please forgive me if it's not exactly what you wanted but believe me when I say I really tried.

I feel with Jason Valentine's Day is an every single day thing with him, I got nothing but love for that man.

Don't be afraid to comment your thoughts, also like and reblog if you want. Ty!! Enjoy lovebugs :) 🩷🦠

(p.s.) do y'all like regular fonts or tiny fonts? Please lmk your preference when it comes to reading. Hopefully everyone is on the same page, I know that'll kind of be hard because everyone reads differently but I'm curious either way.

- ☁️

𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐎𝐍𝐋𝐘; 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐄

⏜︵♡︵⏜︵୨୧︵⏜︵♡︵⏜⏜︵♡︵⏜︵୨୧︵⏜︵♡⏜

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 | +18, mdni, fem!reader, vigilante/bf! JasonTodd, good ol' missionary, love making, oral (f receiving), lovey dovey, a little bit of masturbation, submissive, pet names: babe, baby, mamas, doll, love, sweetheart. This is a pretty long one, longer than I expected so please forgive me for that. Edited, but in case of any errors, ignore :) ty <3<3<3

𝐕𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐀 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐉𝐀𝐒𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐄, hits his nose upon entering your apartment. The sight of your spacious living room made him freeze as it was pristine and polished...not at all clustered with clutter or seen as untidy like it usually does.

Junk mail shredded and thrown to the trash. The floor in every room vacuumed and mopped.

Rose petals along the floor.

Books and vinyls were placed on the bookshelf in alphabetical order. The numerous polyester blankets you loved collecting were placed in the wicker basket near the brown entertainment center.

The lamp beside the couch was dimmed low. A few candles lit around the space. Gentle, slow music played lightly through the record player.

On the coffee table was a box of assortments, chocolate covered fruit with a drizzle of white chocolate on top, two glasses of wine and a red heart shaped gift bag on the side.

The atmosphere was warm and cozy. Intimate and sacred meant for two. Undoubtedly, there was something so perfect and elegant about this space that it had his heart fluttering.

It was subtle and simple, it made him grow impatient wanting nothing more than to see you and hold you. After a day of patrolling, dealing with Bruce and so on, he couldn't wait to get home.

This morning, he gave you breakfast in bed, surprised you with six different banquets of flowers, a diamond necklace with matching studs and ring that had the words "my one and only," engraved around it. He went as far as to give you his debt card.

Now, you never liked to spend his money on anything. You didn't even like the fact that he was spoiling it on you, but because he was as stubborn as a mule, he had cleared out your schedule anyways. He scheduled an appointment at the spa to get your nails done and an appointment at the hair salon. Although you pouted out of appreciation and told him he didn't have to do that, he rebuttal with a kiss on your lips and said, "I would do anything just for you."

After a day of getting pampered, you figured since your schedule was cleared, it was the perfect opportunity to tidy up the place, make it all presentable with rose petals on the floor, some vanilla scented candles, dim lighting-- make it look intimate and homey. Setting a few gifts in line, a box of chocolate covered strawberries and red wine on the table. You wanted it to look perfect before Jason came home.

It had only taken two and a half hours to shower, drench yourself in vanilla scented soap, moisturize your soft skin with Shea butter and spray on some perfume. You applied on some mascara and blood red lip gloss before slipping on a little something something.

And while you got yourself ready and the night began to set, you hear the apartment door shut.

"Baby, I'm home!" Jason feels his body relax when he hears the sound of your soft hums coming from down the hall, "Be right there!" Presumably believing you were in the bathroom since your bedroom light was off.

While he occupied himself with placing his weapons in a nearby safe box and leaned down to untie his boot laces, he hears you emerge from out of the bathroom, down the short hall towards the living room. You find him hunched over by the door placing his shoes to the side.

"How was it tonight?" You ask.

He hears your steps grow slow, pacing around.

"Slow as fuck. Don't know why Bruce called me in when he could've been back home with Selina. There was barely anyone out tonight." He states with slight irritation in his voice.

You nearly giggle as he continues to grumble underneath his breathe. When he stands up straighter, he's taken back by the sight of your appearance.

Suddenly breathless and speechless, his eyes scaled over your gorgeous anatomy moving around the coffee table to grab yourself a chocolate covered strawberry.

Jaw clenched and body slightly tense, a wave of emotions hit him all at once. He watches you approach the end of the sofa and perch yourself up on the armrest of the couch. Your soft, glowing legs crossed one over the other as you take small bites at the sweet fruit.

Flushed and piqued, his eyes grew wide from beneath the helmet. In all your glory, you looked so plushy and soft as your body was snugged in a sexy cherry red two piece lingerie.

It's material hugged around the bust of your tits, giving them an extra lift from the band underneath. Your nipples were hard from the lukewarm air seeping through the vents, causing them to surface through the thin fabric. The delicious sight of the thong hugging around the curves of your hips and richness of your thighs made you look all so yummy.

More yummy than that damn chocolate covered strawberry in your mouth right about now. He thought.

You nodded towards his direction, smiling a little when you noticed he hadn't moved an inch since you made eye contact, but, was just standing there, staring at you. "Need some help taking that off, handsome?" You say teasingly, impressed and aroused by the newly improved suit branded in all black hugged and defined every muscle and thick part of his anatomy. The symbolic red bat emblem placed in the middle of his chest, some pieces of his suit were still kevlar and others were leather.

He chuckles, finding himself stunned by you entirely. He thinks he might go insane just by the way you were looking at him. Ruin you and devour you. He had to take a moment to register your words, finding it hard to focus on anything but you.

"Uh, well....that's if you're up for the challenge, babygirl." He reckons, the modulator within the helmet making his voice ten times deeper than usual. "Otherwise, I'll gladly strip this off for you."

"Mmm, a strip tease? I believe you got me there, baby." You purred, tilting your head to the side curiously. The sound of clicking is heard, hissing from underneath causing pressure to be released. His hands reach up for the red helmet, slipping it off carefully to reveal his head.

"Personally I think that option would be more... sexier." You thought out loud allowing your shiny red lips to wrap seductively around the berry and deliberately suck on the chocolate.

He releases a deep chuckle as he sets the helmet to the side. His short black and white streak hair sexily tousled and curly from the humidity of the helmet.

The sight of his handsome face and those piercing sapphire eyes made you feel a storm brew from within, butterflies swarming in the pit of your stomach, your nerves tingling. You felt a wave of excitement circulate through your system as he glances between you and the living room.

"I love what you did with the place."

He stood tall, glaring over your gorgeous profound frame. He doesnt take his eyes off you as he begins to slip the gloves off, setting them on a nearby shelf. Carefully unzipping the leather jacket, he slips it off and lays it to the side.

"I wanted it to look extra special for tonight."

Your words were sweet, too sweet, to the point, his own teeth were about to rot. Effortlessly, you had him in a chokehold, you lived rent free in his mind. With all your cuteness, your down right innocence and flaws, you had a way of tugging at his heart strings.

Like any other time, you always found yourself swooned at the sight of him. Whether he's in armour, shirtless with grey sweatpants, roaming around here in only boxers or just outright naked, his fine ass could never fail to amaze you.

You fell hard for Gotham's most favorite vigilante.

The way he treats you, cares for you, makes you feel like a queen, practically worshiping the ground you walk on and then some, he would do just about anything to see you smile again and again and again-- he had your heart, and you had his.

"Hm, and this?" He points to the lingerie you were currently settled in, walking up to you with his hands buried in his pockets.

"Oh this? I bought it after I got my hair and nails done. Which thank you by the way, it was very much needed." You stated twinkling your fingers his face. "I figured I'd give it a shot," you shrugged intentionally running your hands over your body, "I wanted to see how it looked on me and honestly I think I made the best decision in my life, don't you agree?"

Purposely wanting his eyes to stay on you at all times, you stood up from your seat to give a little spin. It was slow and cruel as your hands roamed down along your sides to the band of your thong, fingers curling underneath the band to then hear them smack against your skin from the tight restriction. His eyes examined closely with a low hum in satisfaction at the sweet roundness of your ass cheeks.

"So, what do you think?~ You like it?" You chimed in a sing-song tone.

"Hm, I do," He draws you closer, your hands resting at the tops of his shoulders to feel his own squeeze at your sides and slowly draw lower, pressing you possessively against his hard torso. The tip of his nose brushes against your cheek, delicately planting kisses to your skin feeling how your flesh begins to heat up. He whispers into your ear "In fact, I love it on you so much, I just might fuck you in it."

You'd be lying if you said that wasn't your plan from the beginning. However, somewhere in your goofy mind, you didn't think it was gonna be this soon.

He kissing along your cheek and adventuring to ghost over your lips. He feels you lean into his embrace, reaching up on the tops of your tippy toes to place your delicate hands along his face, he engulfed every ounce of you.

With half lidded eyes, Jason watches how your lashes kiss at your cheeks, brows scrunched at the savoring taste of mint and chocolate on each other's tongues made you moan softly. With each peck, the kiss grew deeper and deeper. With needy intent, his fingers began to dig into your flesh, groping at the fat of your sides.

"God, you smell so good." He murmurs between kisses. Burning with desire, your heavenly intoxicated touch made it so hard for him to detach from you. It left him breathless, forgetful and completely immersed in the presence of you.

It was the kind of intoxicated that made things feverish and desperate, lips feeling more like petals as they move in sync with his. Intoxicating to the point you had him grunting lowly, growling a little as he starts to become greedy.

Everything moved so swiftly as he laid you on the couch. His massive body proceeding to loom over you. You giggle as he tries to follow in pursuit, smiling a little while he leaves a trail of kisses up the navel of your torso.

Laid beneath him in a vulnerable state, your hands were above your head feeling breathless and overwhelmed. You couldn't process everything at once as you felt like the predator had caught its prey in one go.

You observe how his large palms effortlessly veiled around the bust of your breasts. Squeezing them with a gentle yet firm grasp, his thumbs graced ever so gently over your nipples in circular motion. Attentive to the shaky exhale, he notices how your buds become swollen and hard. Taking one in his mouth, he sucks on it gracefully while he teases and pinches the other.

Although you were growing anxious, impatient and needy, you found yourself staring at the boxes of fruit.

"Mmph, jason?"

"Mm'yes baby?"

Your nipple pops from out of his mouth, going in to give the other a lick, he proceeds to leave more kisses down your navel. Mentally thanking God for every imperfect perfect flaw he had placed along your body.

"Shouldn't we...ah, shit...put the fruit away before they melt?"

Jason was too enthralled, in his own little world, to worry about that damn fruit. The way you were worrying your pretty little head over the littlest things had him chuckling wholeheartedly.

He was too bothered to say a word as he was preoccupying himself with your cunt. It looked like a beautiful sloppy mess after he pulled the thong to the side. To see your pretty little pussy glisten under the dim lighting, had his dick twitching in his pants.

"I don't want them to melt...if we...don't put them... Oh my god..." You gasp out of surprise when you feel something soaking wet and warm lapping at your cunt. Gripping onto the cushions, your body tenses as you grew a frown on your face. "Ooh Jason" He spots the rise and fall of your chest as your breathing altered and had grown rapidly.

He moans at the taste of you, closing his eyes to concentrate on the way you lingered on his buds. As large as his hands were, you felt comfortable in the warm callous of his palms. Holding your thighs wide open in place, Jason caresses your skin lovingly while he coaxes you in a deep trance, completely wiping your mind clean as you focused on the way his mouth maneuvered.

It left you speechless, surprised, mind blown, mouth gaped open at the wet muscle gliding between your folds and over your clit. You felt frozen in place, gripping at the cushions as you moaned his name in bliss.

"Fuck, you taste so good, baby."

Relentless and quenching for thirst, the more he inhaled your scent and continued to wallow in it, he found himself growing careless while he devours you.

Your arousal messily drips from around your thighs onto the sofa. You nearly clench your legs closed to the weird sensation of smacking, slurping, squelching and gushing from your pretty little hole.

As he latches his mouth around your lower lips, he dips two fingers into your heat. The vibrations of his grunts sends a tickling sensation to your clit. His other hand gripped your thigh steadily in place, feeling a surge of shivers go down your spine when you feel him pull away.

"Mhm, there you go, baby, that's it, just relax for me." He instructs, watching as your head lulls back in the armrest, shoulders slumped as you tug at the cushions.

"Focus on me. Focus on the way I make you feel, feels good now doesn't it?" You nod, humming in response. "Good...you always got your mind wondering about the littlest things, sweetheart." he chuckles observing how your body responds to him, hips bucking for more. "As much as I love you catering to me, tonight I just want it to be all about you. You deserve to relax, to feel good, you deserve to shut your brain off and let me take care of you. Let me treat you to something more soft and sweet. I wanna make sure you're at peace. You deserve to enjoy yourself, mama. You think you can you do that for me?"

You nod but he grunts in disapproval, "use your words, y/n, I wanna hear you say it."

"G-God yes, I can do that." You moaned.

Jason's fingers enter inside your leaking cunt, long and intruding, he thrusts them into your gummy walls. Feeling your sticky walls contract around his digits, he hums pleasing to her sucking him further in, each time getting deeper and deeper. Receiving a glossy shine from your arousal, he smirks moving forward between your thighs.

He takes charge effortlessly controlling and molding your body the way he wants. Massaging at your calves, up around your knees to your thighs where he skims his fingers down and over the inner parts of your thighs and around your hips.

The tips of his fingers reaches towards the curve of your breast, fondling and playing with your hardened nipples, he feels you start to move against him. His tongue thrusting in and out of you, you begin to moan loudly as you swivel your hips to match his pace.

"How does that feel baby? Feels good? Am I doing okay?" His voice grew an octave lower, deeper and raspier than before.

He was near the brink of wanting to ravenously eat you out the more he inhaled your essences. He felt your hands begin to tug at his hair and whine and whimper to the nibbling of teeth at your neck, tasting your perfume along his buds.

"S-So good, you're treating me so well." You stutter.

Groans and moans grew intense, finally giving in and throwing in the towel. Your body submits to the need of yearning, allowing him to stubbornly tend to your aching need.

He took his time appreciating, glorifying, worshiping your body and you as whole. He knew the right words to say, ones that made you feel bubbly inside. He knew how to make a girl feel special.

You always found yourself worrying about something or someone. You could never catch a break. You could never just take a breather for once. But that's what he wanted from you, for you to catch a break. To let someone else take the reins for once and just let you lay back and relax.

At some point you felt so weak and helpless emitting these pathetic whimpers as he slowly took his time to cherish you. But you couldn't help it, that's just how you felt, you were vulnerable underneath his care.

"M'gonna cum, Jay..." You stifled, arching into him.

"Mm, go on baby, cum for me." He instructs benevolently.

Once you release your final shakey exhale, your eyes fluttered close. Your lower abdomen churns and twists as if a knot had become undone, the rushing feeling of liquid exiting from out of your entrance spurts all over his fingers, a creamy substance coating them prettily.

"Mhm, there you go, baby. Such a good girl." He praises, licking your cum from off his fingers and down from your center. "Damn, you taste sweeter and sweeter every time." He murmurs, cleaning the rest of the mess you made before planting a kiss.

"Mm, off...please," you demand eagerly.

"Heh, needy baby?" He puzzles, pecking your lips repeatedly with an amused yet teasing tone to his voice.

"Very." You say trying to search for an opening any where in his suit.

"Okayokayokay! Hold on, love. Patience." He laughs prying your hands away from his body.

You watched as he strips of his suit, when he feels your gaze on him, he turns to you with a mischievous smirk, eyes filled with lust. "How you want it, baby?" He asks voice sultry as he kisses between your jaw and neck.

"Like this," you respond, pouting. "I wanna see your face."

"As if you don't see this face enough, every single day." Brushing his hair from out of his face, he groans to the feeling of his hand wrapped around his dick. Thick and long, precum protruding from his pink mushroom tip, you glimpse at the way his thumb begins to smear it around the tip and along his shaft, collecting salvia halfway, he slowly strokes himself off.

"When we have sex it's different. It's more intimate and sweet, gratifying even." You say seductively, biting on your lip.

Pussy beginning to ache and throb at the sight of him. Your delicate fingers draw south of your body like a magnet, gliding them between your folds, up and down and around your clit, you start to apply more pressure.

He notices you start to work yourself through, twitching in the palm of his hand, he glares over the way you handle yourself with such elegance.

Silky and sultry, he's vigilant to the way you moan his name, persuading him to come closer with just one single look.

Gradually with close and careful precision, the tip of his dick asserts itself inside you. Inch by inch, the girth of him painfully yet pleasing stretches you out.

Immediately groaning at the tightness, you praise him for the way he completes you, fulfilling every inch till he was half way in.

He fitted right on in like a missing puzzle piece clearing the void perfectly with the roll of his hips.

With a blissful sigh, your head goes back.

Welcoming the agonizing warmth through your body, your bottom lip gets caught between your teeth. As you focus on the way he thrusts in and out of you steadily, slowly you try to adjust to his size, cursing underneath your breath, "F-fuck it's been too long. You're so big, baby." You whimper.

"I know, baby, I i know, just relax for me, m'kay?" he coos burying his face into the crook of your neck.

Danity hands running past his shoulders, the rippling effect of his muscles beneath your fingertips to then wrap your arms around him completely, drawing him closer.

Eyes fluttering shut the scent of his heavy cologne and gunpowder overwhelms you, traces of your kisses left on his shoulder and neck, your right hand moves towards the roots of his hair, curling around his silky strands.

Veiny hands brushing between the ends of your thighs to the roundness of your ass, your knees bend and legs open a little bit more for him to bottom out. His cock domineering into the dark enclosed space, he feels you pucker around the base of his dick, sucking him in deeper and deeper till he reached your pillowy cervix.

Your beautiful raunchy melodies grew louder and louder with every passing minute.

"Shit, Jay yes, right there."

Moaning his name repeatedly, his pace accelerates, hips starting to rut in rhythmic motion. Breaths bated, heavy grunts and cursing underneath his breath, he listens to you begin to wail as your nails dig into his skin. Skin slapping skin from the result of his hips pounding into yours, the continuous squelching of your arousal coaxes around your thighs with a fervor.

Nose ghosting over your pulse, he hums at the increase of your heart beat, lips placing a delicate kiss to the inimate space, he hears you start to speak gibberish.

"Fuck... I love you, I love you so much."

Without second thought, your words overflow like a fountain.

Joyously overcame with the idea of being adorned and desired from someone worth loving. You chose him out of all people, you chose him to be the love of your life.

And hearing those three little words slip from out of your mouth, made his movements go slow.

Eyes shot open and wide, he swears his heart just skipped a beat.

Flushed out of shock, his head stayed at the base of your neck. You, however, continued to hold him. Knowing that your words were gonna come off as unexpected and sudden, you didn't want to let him go, you weren't going to allow him to run away from the fact that the moments you've shared together wasn't all for nothing. That feeling that scared the living shit out of both of you was there.

Jason was terrified to say it. Maybe because he didn't ever want to run into the possibility of his lover being taken away from him? How his lifestyle is, he never had the problem of losing anything but when he met you, it was different. There was a chance, a possibility, that you could be gone in a blink of an eye. It was hard to fathom how someone, like you, could be so precious and yet so sweet, live in a world that was all dark and gloomy, his world, specifically. It didn't add up and didn't make any sense why you stayed with him after knowing what he does, after knowing about his messed up past and who his family truly was and what he was all about. How could you have stayed all this time?

There was silence.

You feel his head lift to give you a studied gaze, your hands coming up to cup his cheeks. Your thumbs stroke at his scarred face.

He leans into your embrace, his forehead meeting yours, nose brushing against yours, his breath bated just as much as yours. This unfamiliar emotion growing deep within his chest made him suddenly shy, eyes flickering between yours with swollen gaped lips.

"It's okay, Jay, you can say it." You coerce in a hush tone, glancing between his orbs.

He completely melts into you, his gaze softening with grace and adoration.

"I love you, y/n," He utters, feeling his chest tighten. "I love you so much. I love you with fiber in my body. I love you to the point of living...to the point of death." His jaw clenched, swallowing hard. "Fuck... you make me feel so alive...I couldn't lose you to anything, baby, I can't...you'd be the death of me."

All you could do was smile and reach in to give him a sloppy kiss.

Like countless times before he proves himself right.

Without even telling you, you knew from the way he cared for you time after time again that he's always loved you and vise versa of course. You knew deep down inside he loved you from the start. It was evident in the way he kept engaging with you, there was consistency, constantly making effortless eye contact with you and attentive to you mentally, physically and emotionally. He loved you past your flaws. Equally, you both loved how you two just connected with a snap of a finger.

Even after this moment you were so sure of his promise-- his oath, that you were his one and only.

And after a few rounds of endless love making, intensive fucking and tainting each other's skin, Jason and you were tangled up on the floor with your backs against the couch. While opening the last bit of gifts, a polyester blanket covers your lower halves as you feed each other chocolate covered fruit and sip on some wine.

Aside from the necklace you'd gotten this morning, you received a pair of your favorite shoes. You've been keeping your eyes on them for awhile now. They were expensive as hell and you were just waiting for them to get on sale.

Jason, however, went ahead and bought them without hesitation. He also bought a couple of outfits to even complete the look. You'd receive a goody basket of all your favorite snacks, a big stuffed teddy bear and another vinyl to add to your collection.

For Jason, he was gifted another book from a vintage store, a brand new pair of shoes since the last ones were starting to get a little raggedy, two matching hoodies and sweatpants, and a recipe book that he had been meaning to get but completely forgotten about it.

When the boxes were all empty and red wrapping paper was all over the place, he noticed one more sitting on the coffee table by the half empty bottle of wine.

"I'm assuming this one's for me?" He points, cocking a brow at you.

You frown following his gaze.

"Oh shit, yeah, that's yours alright." You confirm stuffing your mouth with a gummy bear, propping your arm up on the couch and resting your head in your hand.

He chuckles with a shake of his head, reaching for the red heart shape bag and settling back down beside you.

You study carefully as he starts to pull the paper from out of the bag. Expecting to see the present right then and there, he scoffs when he lifts the box in his hand.

"What did you get me, woman?" He grumbles playfully, putting the bag and paper to the side.

"Open it and you shall find out." You state smartly drawing closer to him with anticipation.

The last gift you'd gotten him was a military dog tag, a locket with a picture of you and him inside it. It captured the moment when he had asked you to be his girlfriend in midwinter. Around the falling snow at a nearby park. There was a wide smile on your face when you had said yes. Jason was so nervous that day, he thought he was going to shit his pants.

Beside it was a silver sterling ring with gold edges around it and along the inside of it were the words "forever mine" engraved on it.

Although he wasn't the kind of person to lavish in jewelry, this was something worth showing off... aside from you of course.

He looks to you with gratitude, leaning in to give you a passionate kiss, you move half way. Your noses brush before your lips collide.

The lingering taste of pineapple kiwi from the candy along your tongue evolves in his mouth as he deepens the kiss.

Sucking the sweetness off your lips, his hand wraps around your neck, engulfing every sense of you as your mouths moved leisurely.

"I love you." He whispers once more, after parting from you.

Observing the sparkle in your under the candle lighting, he notices the smile across your face grew wider, nudging your nose against his sweetly.

"I love you too, Jason. Happy Valentine's Day, baby."

𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓𝐒 𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐕𝐄𝐃

𝐃𝐎 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐀𝐋 ©𝐦𝐭𝐜𝐥𝐨𝐮𝐝𝐬 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟓

Masterlist | 𝕾𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋

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kaiquesrambles · 2 days ago

Text

A Realistic Outlook on dating Hawks

Distorted Reflections - Hawks

This ended up kind of only focusing on the bad parts lmao-

Now lets get this straight- dating Hawks? Miracle. My next question is why?

He's... he's not an easy person to love. He's sarcastic and a sassy little shit most of the time when you actually get to know him properly, but flips on a dime to be the well-known and well-loved, kind-hearted, gentle hero everyone assumes he is.

The hero he lets everyone see.

He is not easy to love. Yes, he'll cherish and adore you, just shy of worshipping you, but he's also not very often around. He's a hero, and in his universe, that means he's spending weeks upon weeks out of town in the fucking trenches. He's shedding blood, hunting people down, planning. And if he's not doing any of that, he's patrolling.

"Hawks." You murmur gently, relief filling you as he settles quietly against the balcony. You stare at him- his golden eyes reflecting yours, catching the dimming sun and sending the warm light dancing. The smile on his face looks just a little less forced, just a little more real. "... hey, chickadee." He whispers, voice soft and affectionate. You slump into him, he catches you in a firm embrace. ... so many words are always left unsaid between you. It's better that way. You don't want to spend the time you have together fighting.

Hawks doesn't like being called Keigo, full stop. In fact, it triggers his flight or fight response and he gets very violent.

He would never, ever, ever raise a hand to you intentionally- but this man has undiagnosed C-PTSD with violent outbursts if he's ever triggered. He doesn't want to hurt you- god he doesn't want to hurt you- but he needs you to be patient with him.

Please, be patient with him. He's trying. He's never had a meaningful relationship in his life where both people's lives weren't on the line. He's never truly loved anyone.

So please be patient with him. He's trying his hardest but he's far from being perfect.

Oh- and don't think you went into this relationship unaware of any of this. He warns you that loving him, caring for him, being by his side is not going to be easy.

... which, I guess, brings us to the next part-

This man does not sleep. He has hallucinations, near constant ones that flicker at the corners of his visions and sometimes right in front of him because he won't let himself sleep. He can't. He's been conditioned to keep going until he passes out- and he does. And you can't force him to sleep, as much as you want to, because you can see the way he gets silently panicky whenever he even oversleeps for even a few seconds.

He never tells you about what he's been through, but it's not hard to see the signs that whatever it was, left him severely fucked up.

We don't even talk about how damn well he can mask. How he can cover up his emotions as if he can perfectly control every part of his body. Every inch. Every muscle. So sometimes you can't even tell. Not even his wings give him away.

You tell him you want more time with him.

"When the world is quieter." He offers you a lopsided smile- one that you're sure holds exhaustion and guilt behind it, "when I'm sure the world will finally leave you alone."

Because it's always for you. He always does everything for you. It's for you, or for others. You don't think he's ever done anything in his life.

The life of loving the number one pro is hard, but he's trying.

God, he's trying.

He just hopes that you can handle dealing with him and wherever the relationship ends up.

#bnha hawks #mha hawks #mha #mha au #keigo takami #hawks #distorted reflections #takami keigo #bhna #mha aus #hawks x reader #keigo takami x reader #takami keigo x reader

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my-rose-tinted-glasses · 1 day ago

Text

Whenever there's a line up event, one of the things that I'm starting to look forward to the most are the show's english names. They are always...interesting. Anyway, a lot of new stuff. They are certainly rivalling gmmtv in terms of content and the event itself. That was looooong and there were a LOT of announcements.

Before I go into new shows. We finally got a date for The Next Prince and it's April. Also Zomvivor has a new teaser and it will air...soon. Goddammit. Speaking of elusive air dates, Khemjira is also coming...soon. It's like they don't want me to be happy. I need all the horror. Your Sky of Us will be a special 3 episode event that will follow the characters into adulthood. I like the idea of seeing the couples after the show's hea so this should be nice. Now for everything else. I added link to the mdl pages and the trailers, so if you don't want my unsolicited opinions just click on the links below the pics.

[ MDL | Trailer ] Love Upon a Time - It's not exactly a new announcement but we finally got a pilot with the new cast and I really enjoyed it. I'm convinced that Net is one of those actors that can have chemistry with anyone so this should be good at least when it comes to the main couple. When it comes to fantasy thai bl, I never want to get my hopes too high because a lot of the time they tend to forgo internal narrative consistency for the sake of the romance, but either way, I will be watching this one.

[ MDL | Trailer ] Your Third - MaxNat romcom, why not? When it comes to the romance, I think they can pull it off, but the comedy? Not so sure. I don’t hate anything here, but I can’t say I really love anything either.

[ MDL | Trailer ] Mr.Fanboy - Well this should be interesting. I do like when bl goes a bit meta, so I'm looking forward to see what DMD has to say about this. AuAu and Save fans must be losing it to see them as leads, and I was surprised to see James. I thought he wasn't gonna be in any series for a while, but I'm not as well informed about these things. Interesting cast and concept. I will be tuning in.

[ MDL | Trailer ] You(r)Tuber - Do you see what I mean? These names kill me. Looks cute. Surprised to see Earth and First but nothing really excites me about this one. Oh wait, I'm wrong, there are pets and more importantly a cat. That makes me happy.

[ MDL | Trailer ] Duang With You - My crumbs have graduated and I'm screaming. I love everything about this, but honestly, I love TeeteePor. They are beautiful. I also love a shameless flirt that will thaw the heart of a brooder. So I'm winning either way.

[ MDL | Trailer ] Restart - This is giving Elite but with some extra bullying for good measure. It's also giving nakedness galore. DMD knows their audience. I'm guessing we will be seeing a lot of showers. I'm happy to see Tommy again. I'm not sure if this is exactly bl, but with the amount of naked boys in the pilot alone, might as well be.

[ MDL | Trailer ] Magic Lover – I guess it was only a matter of time for BL to start playing with magic. I mean, we're in our vampire season, so this was the next logical step. Anyway, ThomasKong are back. And Keng… I have to admit, very few actors illicit a strong reaction from me solely based on their looks, but Keng is one of them. That guy has an absolutely flawless face. I like that we have 3 different couples and I like fantasy and fated mates so I'm definitely on board.

[ MDL* | Trailer ] HUG E-Lhee The Musical - Ok, I LOVE musicals. Seriously. And let’s be real, when it comes to musicals, especially the more comedic ones, there’s always a built-in level of cringe. Which is fine. People randomly breaking into song pretty much guarantees that. But throwing BL into the mix, along with some folks who aren’t exactly great singers? That might just be a step too far for me. No shade, just a personal preference. (*no mdl page yet)

Also announced was another ThomasKong show, Unknown Lover, and a DMD Sitcom, หอตัวดี, with literally all the boys.

Well, that's everything from me. Obviously most of these will come in late 2025 and 2026. And despite everything I just said, I’ll probably still end up watching the first episodes of all the shows.

#dmd lineup 2025 #the next prince #love upon a time #your third #mr fanboy #your tuber #restart the series #duang with you #magic lover the series #HUG E-Lhee the musical #upcoming bl #rose rambles #domundi #thai bl #multi bl

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xoxoavenger · 20 hours ago

Note

Hi, I saw your post about wanting some bycky requests I may have one.

Could you please write some Bucky x Fem!Reader where the reader is Tony's daughter? You can choose the plot, I kinda like imagining her being a cop or something like that tho

Feel free to ignore if you don't like it ♡

thank you for getting the ball rolling! I always have reader be adopted, just to have the story be more inclusive (and also to help make the age gap less crazy lol) and I also made reader a SWORD agent instead to fit the storyline, but this helped so much, thank you!

Win

pairing: Bucky Barnes x Fem!Stark!Reader

summary: Bucky's running for Congress, and he needs a win to help make some change. Y/N's just trying to support him the best she can.

word count: 2799

warnings: reader is adopted, age gap (MCU is in 2027 everyone so by my math reader is like late 30s, Bucky is mid-fourties, but you can imagine it however you want there's no specifics), if you're new here reader calls Bucky 'James' bc i like that and think it's cute, Bucky has some issues, written pre-Thunderbolts movie release so there could be some future inaccuracies

masterlist

Bucky knew he could never actually retire.

It was a nice thought, but in practice he hated how fucked the world was, how much he seemed like part of the the problem. It's why he's running for Congress, so he can make a difference in a way that doesn't have anything to do with violence.

He's in a deep in paperwork when she walks in, pantsuit ironed to perfection and a folder of papers he's sure are for him in her arms.

"Mr. Barnes," She smiles, and Bucky's never been more happy to see her. "I've brought some papers from Media, most of them about you smiling more. I told them you shouldn't lie before you've even gotten into office, but they refused to see how smiling could be this big of a problem. So clearly, they don't know you very well." Y/N Stark is a ray sunshine in Bucky's office, and he doesn't know how he got her.

SWORD agent Y/N Stark, adopted by Tony Stark after Nat saved her from the Black Widow program just before meeting Tony in 2008 while she was in Budapest, believing that Y/N had been the last of the Red Room. Y/N had been just 16, and Natasha wasn't in the greatest place to be a guardian. To be fair, neither was Tony, but at least she also had Pepper. Y/N changed her last name before she turned 18, since her parents had given her up as a baby and she didn't like her past defining her. Bucky had first met her when fighting at the airport in 2016, and after they went into hiding Bucky had talked Steve into sending Y/N a package just like Tony had gotten, and she had called. They began dating in secret, as she helped SHEILD rebuild itself as SWORD, and was granted entrance into Wakanda to visit him as he healed from the trigger words. They were finally getting back to where they had been before the snap, when Bucky had disappeared and Y/N had lived five years in grief.

But now Bucky was trying to figure out how to get her to retire and work with him, because he thinks a change might be exactly what he needs to make him feel better. The more he learns about politics, the more he doesn't know how to make the change he wants to.

"Well," Bucky leans back in his seat, stretching his back. He's been sitting all day, a harsh change from his life before, but he honestly likes it. It feels nice to not be conditioned to fight at every second, to be able to relax even just a little bit. "I hope you told them I'm not doing that." He says lowly, and his fiancé rolls her eyes with large grin.

"How did I end up with a hundred and three year old grump?" She asks, walking all the way in and dropping the papers on his desk. Bucky reaches up and pulls her into his lap, pushing her jacket back because he loves to see the leather vest she wears that holsters her gun over the white button up blouse.

"It's actually a hundred and ten." He says. He knows that she knows this, that she knows his actual birthday even if everyone likes to pretend that he wasn't frozen and used by HYDRA for years which makes him actually in his late thirties, maybe early forties.

"Ugh, old man." She says, but her smile is painted on, almost like the opposite of her.

"You love it." He leans his mouth up, and she leans down to give him a quick kiss. This isn't enough for him, and he leans back in to chase her lips.

"James, people actually work in this office. They don't want to see a couple macking in the middle of the day." She says as she gets off his lap, which makes Bucky upset.

"Macking?" He questions, because she's always using these words that he has no idea what they mean.

"Come on, grab your papers and let's go." She doesn't explain the word, instead holding out a hand that Bucky only grabs onto, not letting her pull him up and out of his seat.

"I can't leave yet." He wants to, he really does, but he has so much work to do. The election is coming up faster and faster, and he feels his opportunity to change things slipping through his fingers.

"James," She whispers, yanking on him to no avail. She frowns, and he wishes for a moment that he could just stop everything and go home with her.

"I can't lose." He tells her softly, and she just nods, even though she doesn't fully understand.

"Okay." She lets her hand slip out of his, and Bucky wishes that he could go back to those nights they spent in Wakanda. They were so unrushed, so calm. "I'll see you at home, then." She calls over her shoulder as she exits the room, a smile on her face even though he can hear the hurt in her voice.

"I'll bring dinner." He says, knowing that he always drives past her favorite restaurant. He needs to make it up to her, but she's shaking her head with her lips tight.

"I won't count on it. Maybe we can go out to dinner on the weekend." She says, and he nods in understanding. He's late to get home a lot, but this is important to him. Doing this without Steve, without Y/N's name or money, it's almost like he has to prove that he can make it in society.

"I love you," He says, and when she responds he turns back to his work. It's the last thing he wants to do, but he refuses Y/N's offers to get him a full team with a full New York office. He's going to do this on his own.

He can do this.

When Bucky loses the election, he wishes he could say that he saw it coming.

He knew about the people calling him unfit, knew about how a lot of people thought he was emotionally unstable despite his record of therapy. The people who never forgave him for his crimes, the ones that he was under mind control for, the ones he doesn't even remember committing. But for a second, he thought that they could look past that and see the good he was trying to do. Y/N calls as soon as the news is announced, but Bucky is already packing his shit up and leaving the the office.

When she gets home, his metal arm is disconnected from his body and hidden away somewhere. In his right hand, he has a stiff drink, and he's staring at the tv, on a low volume but playing the news.

"James," She whispers, slipping her shoes off and walking over to him. "I'm so sorry, babe." She tells him, walking onto his couch and folding a leg under her as she puts a hand on his shoulder.

"I wanted to do something." He says, eyes glassy. He doesn't even look at her, but he's not really looking at the TV anymore. "Ever since I fell off that train 1945, my life hasn't felt like my own. I haven't done anything to help anyone. All I've done is watch my own life pass before my eyes, watch the families of people I killed," A tear falls, and his face scrunches as tries to hold it in.

"You helped save the world." She says, not mentioning the fact that Bucky doesn't seem to think that she was a good thing. He's clearly in a dark place right now, and her bringing herself up isn't going to help anything. All these comments from people who have nothing better but to hid behind a screen have him slipping back to before he went to therapy, and Y/N hates this. "You saved those hostages when everything was going down with the Flagsmashers. You are a good man. You have done good things. You can't let these people who think they know your past get into your head."

"I just feel so helpless." He finally looks at her, and her heart breaks. "I saved the world, but did I really make a difference? I didn't sacrifice myself like your dad did. I can't lift Thor's hammer like Steve. I'm not Captain fucking America. I thought that maybe, just maybe, I could do this one thing. This one fucking small act. But my life doesn't change. I can't be the White Wolf, because I'm already the Winter Solider." His voice cracks, and Y/N pulls him into her arms. She wishes people could see Bucky Barnes the way she does, the way he loves, the way he cares.

"You would have made a great Congressman." She tells him honestly, pushing some of the long hair he's been growing out away from his face. "And I'm proud of you for trying. We'll find a way to get you to make a difference the way you want to. This wasn't your path, but that doesn't mean that you aren't destined for change." He smiles through his tears, and they share a chaste kiss before Y/N helps him to the shower.

Three weeks later, Y/N wishes she could say she was surprised when she sees Bucky standing in the middle of New York, staring at the Void that Y/N had been sent out to collect data on.

"James?" Y/N screams over the wind, and Bucky's eyes widen. Even if he didn't hear her voice, he would have known because she's the only one that calls him by his first name. She's done it since they met, and every time he asks why she just laughs and doesn't answer the question.

"Oh, fuck." He mutters, causing everyone to look over at him.

"What?" Alexi asks loudly, never one for subtlety.

"What on God's green earth do you think you're doing here?" She asks, walking up to Bucky. She feels the need to slap her fiancé, hit him with the new ring he got her, but she controls herself.

"Y/N," Bucky starts, turning around and looking at her. The metal arm is reattached, his tactical suit on. When she left his morning he was still asleep, but she did know that something was different lately. This problem they were having with a super human who had insanely terrifying void powers, and they had basically no information about them. She had been so busy that she didn't have time to figure out why Bucky was acting different; she naively assumed that he was healing after his loss. He walks closer to her, trying to keep their conversation private.

"I swear," She looks beyond mad, and Bucky knows everyone is watching them. "I have too many thoughts right now to fully articulate how I'm feeling." She tells him, and he knows he deserves this.

"I meant to tell you," He truly did, but he just never felt like there was enough time. This was conversation that required more tact than he thought he had at the moment. It's not that he was trying to lie to his fiancé, but he knew he wasn't actively telling the truth.

"Are you gonna introduce me to your new friends?" She asks sarcastically, waving at them all around Bucky's body. She recognizes Natasha's sister, Yelena, but that's about it. As she scans the rest of the group, however, she sees another face. "Oh, you've gotta be shitting me." She says, watching John realize that she's locked in on him.

"No, no, no, Y/N, please, just let me explain," He grabs her around the waist when she starts to march over to him, because while he would never underestimate her he also knows that John is a different person with the serum in him.

"John fucking Walker, James? Really?" She yells, loud over the quiet, deserted street.

"James?" Yelena repeats with a small smile, and Y/N turns her murderous glare to the ex-Black Widow.

"Who the fuck are you people?" She asks, letting Bucky turn so he's facing the team and on Y/N's side.

"We're the Thunderbolts!" A large Russian man in a red yells, smiling widely. Y/N blinks, then looks at Bucky.

"That's not our name." He says to her, as if that actually matters.

"Oh my God," She whispers, because she's not sure what's actually going on anymore.

"I am Yelena. We've heard a lot about you, Y/N Stark." Yelena says with a smirk, and Y/N forces a tight smile. She puts emphasis on the last name, because even though they only knew each other briefly, Y/N had met Yelena in the Red Room once or twice.

"Thanks for the introduction. As for the rest of you, except off brand stars and stripes over here, could you please tell me what this is?" She asks, because she figures her fiancé isn't going to tell her now.

"We're a team." A girl in a completely grey suit says.

"Like the Avengers!" The man in the red suit yells, and Y/N turns to Bucky.

"No." He disagrees, and she just nods, eyes closed. "I swear to you, Y/N, I have tried to tell you, but I didn't know if you'd understand. I just, I needed to do something." And she gets it. She knows that he's been having this issue, and she knows it had to have been hard for him to tell her.

"I'm still mad at you." She says with a sigh.

"I know." He smiles, putting a hand on her back and pulling her forward to kiss her forehead. "Now, you should get out of here. We can take care of this." He gestures to the giant Void that was looming in the distance.

"I have to do my job, James, I can't just,"

"You can join us!" Red suit says once more, and Bucky turns to glare at him before Y/N can say anything. She jumps in, not wanting to deal with the threat that is probably going to come out of Bucky's mouth.

"I have a job. But this seems like such a great group." She says sarcastically, aiming it at John, who scowls.

"I am not that bad." He argues, and Bucky has to grab her arm to ensure she won't jump him.

"I don't think anyone has lost a job faster than you fucked up being Captain America, you absolute shit stick." She tells him, which clearly strikes a nerve.

"You wanna talk about losing Captain America? Are we sure Bucky here was your first choice?" John has that smirk that Y/N wants to slap right off his face, but she's not sure he wouldn't kill me.

"Are you kidding me?" Yelena yells over them, and Y/N knows she should feel like a scolded child, but she just feels rage at John Walker. "There's a goddamn Void behind us that is eating people, and you two are fighting over the fact that he annoys you?" She looks at Y/N, who is somehow even more angry

"Yelena, I don't know if you're mad at me because N,-" Bucky is placing his right hand over her mouth, knowing exactly what Y/N was about to say and how she was going to single handedly take this team down. Everyone was very volatile, and he knew that the slightest thing could set them off.

"Please, just let me handle this? I'll see you at home." He is not above begging, and he knows he has to in order to get her home.

"I was sent here for a reason." She argues, because she's not gonna let her man stop her from doing her job.

"By the time you get what you need, we'll have taken care of this. So just go home,"

"Do not tell me-"

"Y/N, please." He finally looks at her with big eyes, and she is trying to hold her ground.

"This is my job, James. Ya know, the job that pays for our apartment." She's not mad anymore, because she knows Bucky just wants to protect her. But she won't back down without a fight.

"What if I pick up dinner?" He sweetens the pot, and she sighs.

"If you're late, Barnes," She threatens, leaning up to kiss him. He smiles at his win.

"I won't be." He has no way of knowing if he'll be late or not, they both know this, but it's the thought that counts. She gives him one more kiss and then walks away, listening to the conversation between the Thunderbolts.

"Who woulda thought Bucky had a sugar mommy." John says, and while Y/N can't see it, she hears Bucky's fist meet his face and Yelena's laugh.

"You deserved that." The Russian man says, and Y/N couldn't agree more.

taglist: @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @one-sweet-gubler @theoraekenslover @thefandomplace @mcueveryday @icequeen1371 @kenzi-woycehoski @multifandom-boss-bitch

#bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes x reader #marvel imagine

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jensthwa · 1 day ago

Text

mountebank chem: epilogue (JYH x reader).

part of the love's an uncharted path universe ★.

SUMMARY:

* 𝐦𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐛𝐚𝐧𝐤: 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞𝐠𝐮𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦 𝐛𝐲 𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐫𝐲. The first time you met Yunho, you knew he was going to be part of the biggest tragedy of your life: the loss of your freedom, of your free will. You didn't know why back then but what you did figure out is that you and Jeong Yunho were going to, eventually and very publicly, date each other at some point. Is that reason enough to hate his guts? Well, of course! Now, when the time comes to fulfill the prophecy, how the hell are you going to pull it off? And, most importantly, what do you need to do to not fall in love with him in the process?

PAIRING: rich!yunho x afab!rich!reader.

GENRE: enemies to friends to lovers.

WORD COUNT: 7.08k

WARNINGS & TAGS: attempt !!! at comedy, dual pov (both yunho's and reader's), use of fem pronouns for reader, the morning after and the day after that. reader and yunho are very in love is lowkey kind of gross everyone, kissing, fluff, dream-talk, yeosang talk too! a little bit of angst if you squint, decision making and finally standing up for yourself is hard and reader is doing their best, soohyun being a good brother and making reader cry, gyuri being a little shit, wooyoung being a little shit, seonghwa being a good friend, happy endings let's goooo.

NOTES: hi everyone! here's the epilogue i promised! like i've said in a few asks that i've gotten, there's a little bit of the next story here, just something so you all have context of it before going in. i don't know when that one is going to be up (i'm not really far along with it) but either way i want to thank all of you for the patience and the wait! i really loved writing mbc:'). this is 100% self indulgent, as all fics should be, and i think i've re-read it so many times that if you find a typo or something that just doesn't make sense, you can blame it on english not being my first language i guess lmao. i hope you enjoy it and if you do feel free to send to my askbox/reblog/type in any feedback or thoughts! <3

POSTED: february 20th 2025.

taglist: @kyunlov, @tinyelfperson, @0115degrees, @daniela-f-uwu, @ultrapinkvoidbouquet, @kyeomooniee, @fairylover68, @sushiinmidnight, @qveenbunni, @calmoistorm, @potatomountain, @svintsandghosts, @lemonkait00, @blue5ummer, @fancypeacepersona, @hyukssunflower, @i-love-ateez, @alsomimi, @e3ellie, @st3ft0n3s, @hotteokkay, @xylatox, @honeybeehorizon, @hwallazia, @mady-66.

masterlist - part one - part two. part three. part four.

When Yunho wakes up, rested and naked, the room is dark.

He turns to the side and the curtains are, of course, down but the thing is that he doesn’t remember closing them the night before.

When he turns to where you’re supposed to be, the bed is made on your side and you’re not there.

Strangely enough, he doesn’t panic. He is sure of what you both have, he trusts you enough to know you didn’t run away from him, from you two, again.

Also, he can smell a mix of coffee and the turpentine-like smell of paint as he gets dressed with his boxers and the slacks he was wearing the night before after picking them up off the floor and going to the bathroom to wash his face.

He pokes his face out to the living space and there’s a make-shift tarp on the floor, the furniture is moved around to make space for you and an easel. You’re sitting down on a wooden stool, painting away and he wonders if he just missed that last night or if he genuinely just passed out and didn't notice this much change.

He clears his throat “Good morning, princess.”

You jump a little, turning your head to look at him and there’s paint on your face and your hand when you wave at him.

“Hi, Jeong.”

“Seriously?”

“What?”

He chuckles “No cute nickname? Just Jeong?”

“Well, that is your name, isn’t it?” You turn back and he catches that you’re pretending to focus on your painting, but you’re repassing the same painstrokes as before.

“We’re going to have to work on it,” he lets out a sigh that turns into a yawn. “Sorry that I slept in on you. What time is it?”

“Around three.”

“In the afternoon?!” Yunho looks around for his phone but he locates the clock in the wall first and he confirms your words. “Princess, why didn’t you wake me up? We could’ve spent the day together…”

“I rather you rest,” you shrug and he takes a few steps until he’s behind you, his hands immediately reaching out to touch you. He can’t help it, he wants to physically fuse into you but he compromises with nature and just massages your shoulders. “You have sectionals in two weeks, right?”

He frowns at the reminder, a tiny smile on his lips a second later.

“How do you know that?”

You stop the brush on the canvas and then look at him again, eyelashes batting with fake innocence.

“I kind of bribed my assistant so she could bribe yours and now your general schedule is on my phone…”

He fakes a gasp and he marvels in the pout he gets in return.

“I needed to know when you were leaving the dorm this week!”

“So you could drop the gift?”

“Mhm,” you say, puckering your lips to ask for a kiss. He pretends to go for it and he truly pats his back for having a little of self-restraint when he dodges you to pretend he just thought about something.

“Oh! That reminds me…”

You huff in annoyance and interrupt whatever he’s about to say.

“How did you know my room number and who let you in?”

“I paid the receptionist and showed him proof that we were together,” he explains like it’s nothing and you huff again, amused this time. “Told him I wanted to surprise you.”

“That’s so irresponsible.”

Yunho reaches the box he left on the coffee table last night, opens it and pulls the polaroids out.

“You dropped this off without any explanation! What are these?”

When he turns around, you’re already painting again and he gets a five second look in his direction before you return your attention to your art.

“Oh.” there’s a smile on your lips Yunho loves, although he’s not sure if it’s because you’re doing what you love or if you got reminded of something. “I was hoping you asked me about it. I, um, stayed at a resort during New Years, in Gangwondo.”

“Is this the first time we spent Chrismtas and New Years away from each other?”

“Not the first time,” you muse and then shrug, “but definitely the first time in a long time, huh?”

“I didn't like it.”

“Why?” You look at him again and he sits on his knees on the couch like a neglected child, looking your way. You seem to find it endearing, because you laugh. “Because you didn't have anyone to kick under the table this year?”

“That has never happened.”

“Liar. Anyway, they have this winter festival that goes all the way until mid January and they have this… Traditional and modern fusion media dance performance that made me think of you. So I took some pictures of the dancers.”

“So you just put them in the box because you took them while thinking of me?”

There’s shyness painting your tone when you reply “Yeah.”

His heart thumps happily inside his chest and he gets off the couch.

“I love you.”

You laugh again “I love you too, Yunho,” and, as you shake your head a little, you look in the kitchenette direction with your lips pointed at it. “I ordered some breakfast that you can heat up or you can give me… Twenty minutes and I can change and we can—”

Yunho revels in the squeak of surprise you let out when he closes the distance, leans in and catches your lips in a short but firm kiss.

“We can stay in all day if you want to.” He says and you kiss his lips one more time.

“Okay,” you seem happy to have that option so he sees the moment you make the decision to not push going out at all. “There’s some clothes for you in the walk-in closet. I ordered them when I ordered all of this,” you point at the mess on the tarp and the floor, “I figured you might need them.”

“Thank you, my love.” He whispers and he pecks your lips before reaching for your nearly empty coffee cup.

“There’s also one for you in the—”

“I want this one,” he says, a sly smile on his lips and one of his hands returns to your shoulders to massage them.

He takes a look at the canvas for once and he notices that, what he thought was a solid background color and some structure, has actually started to look like the view in front of you both, with the Namsan Tower in the back.

“What about the CD?”

“Hm?”

“Your gift,” he reminds you, “there’s also a CD.”

“A mixtape, with songs that make me think of us.”

Yunho blows some air and he doesn’t have to look down to see you’re frowning at the sound “You’re a romantic.”

“Do you want to die?”

He laughs but doesn’t address the threat at all. Instead, the focus is on your art “The painting of us and the kids is beautiful,” he can feel your skin under his palm heat up at the compliment and it makes him smile. “This one is too.”

“It all just flows so much smoothly when I don’t have to think about work or being home,” you admit, your body relaxing into his when he takes a sip of the cup and brings it around for you to do the same. “I want to stay here, with you, forever.”

“And we can,” he murmurs into your head, leaving a kiss on your temple a second later. “If that’s what you want.”

“I want to move out,” you say, your tone full of wishfulness and Yunho takes in a breath at what that could mean for you, “I want to quit my job.”

“And what do you want to do for work, then?” He asks, already supporting the decision. “You want to paint?”

You shake your head, looking up at him, a wishful glint in your eye “I want to be an art teacher.”

“Oh?”

“Do you want to work for your father?”

“Not in a million years, I— Princess, don’t get mad for what I’m about to tell you, okay?”

You turn in the stool, looking up at him with an inquisitorial brow until he crouches down on the floor to meet your eye.

“My plan has always been to pretend to work and go along with him until I graduate college. Then, I want to move away. I want to… I don’t know, get disowned?”

Eyes widening, you take in a sharp breath and then cough into your hand.

He offers you the cup so you can take the final sip out of it.

“It’s part of why I went along with the PR relationship in the first place.”

You nod and he gulps, staring as you get lost in thought for a second.

“Why would I be mad?”

“Because I sort of planned to use you?”

“Not really, though. You wanted to use the relationship they threw us into?”

“Yeah.”

“That’s understandable, then. I… I understand.” This time, you’re the one gulping and he opens his mouth to say something but you beat him to it. “I, um, I’m not sure if I actually can go against my parents wishes and never see my brother again, Yun.”

He shakes his head. “If you think for a second that Soohyun is going to give a fuck about your parents feelings, you’re wrong. I… Me and Gunho are not as close as I want us to be, you know? But we talk about things.”

“Yeah?”

“Sometimes,” his laugh lasts a few seconds only and then he clears his throat. “If there’s something I'm sure of, princess, is that your brother loves you with all his heart. If you want to step away from the family business, from your parents, he… He’ll understand.”

You nod again.

“And I’m not saying any of this because I want you to do the same things I want to do but I—”

You interrupt him “What do you want to do?”

“Huh?”

“Do you want to work as an engineer?”

“Yes,” he breathes out and you smile, “but I also want to dance. Have an academy, maybe, but I need money and experience and a name.”

“You already have a name.”

“I need to make a name for myself, princess,” he explains and you nod like you already knew, because you probably did. “Get a stage name, maybe.”

“Ha!” you laugh and he raises his eyebrows, amused by your reaction. “Maybe… Yunho the rakehell? Yunho… Oh! Yunho the bitchl—”

“Stop that!”

It seems like that joke is never to die down and he’s glad, he’s glad that he doesn’t take genuine offense in it anymore and he’s glad it makes you laugh in a way he wants to record and play on repeat forever.

Grabbing his face, your thumbs brush against his cheeks and he can swear he has never felt so at ease until now. This, waking up and going out of the room to find you doing what you love. You, looking at him with some much love, it's hard to believe it took you both so long to leave your pride behind and work it out.

“You are worth it, Yunho,” you whisper and he knows right away you’re referring to the fight you both had at the office, “and I have no idea how we’re going to make it, but we are. Of that I’m sure, my love. I trust you,” you brush his hair back and off his forehead, “I trust us.”

He holds your face as well, the pad of his finger passing over the dry paint on your cheek.

“I trust us, too.”

Before he can react, you’re smooching his lips again and he melts into the encounter, the passion of last night bleeding into his movements once again and painting him red when he gets on his knees and pulls you into his lap in a smooth motion. You yelp and laugh and then you moan into his mouth when his hands find your ass and his fingers dig into it through the jeans you’re wearing.

Huh.

You’re wearing jeans.

They look so natural and good on you that he didn’t even notice it’s the first time he seeing you in jeans.

“Again?” You ask, already winded and clinging onto him for dear life in a way that makes him laugh. He pulls back and finds you shyly smiling at him but it doesn’t really help your care that he can see right through the act.

“Can you blame me?”

“Yes, actually.”

“Y/N…”

“It was a joke,” you grab his shoulders to shake him to no avail and then before getting up you lean in to kiss his cheek in a manner so sweet that makes him all giddy, like a fool in love. Maybe because that’s what he is. “Take a shower.”

“Take it with me.” He says, without thinking about it but one hundred percent meaning it.

“I already showered.”

He makes sure to scrunch his nose and make a funny face “Did you really?”

It’s not really a surprise when you turn around from your painting and swipe your brush across his mouth.

“I smell amazing and you smell like shit. Go and shower, Jeong.”

He enjoys ticking you off a bit too much. Either way he laughs, the taste of paint on his tongue when he does and, when he gets up and goes to the bathroom, he hears the soft sound of your giggle and his heart feels full.

And then you get him back like ten minutes later, by turning off the light in the bathroom and almost giving him a heart attack at the sudden loss of it. He breathes out an exaggerated sigh and, when you turn them back on, he turns around and watches you through the glass divider.

Unfortunately for you, the glass is frosted from his chest down, but you lean against the marble counter and eye him suggestively nonetheless. He continues with his shower as if this is the most normal scenario ever for the two of you.

It feels like it, anyway.

“Can I help you, princess?”

“Tomorrow I’ll go home,” you start, not a question or a request, but a fact. “I’ll go home and I'm going to sit with them all at dinner and let them hear what I’m going to do from now on. They don’t need to know that I’m going to take classes—”

“You are?”

Humming, you nod once and then twice after a second of looking at the floor, determination in your stare when you look up at him again. “I’m going to get a bachelor’s in art education, maybe just art first. It’ll take time but…” You shrug.

“But you’ll be doing what makes you happy.” He finishes for you.

“Yeah,” you return softly, “and I'll be detached from my family’s hip eventually.”

“One will argue,” he says, closing his eyes to avoid shampoo to get into them, “that you’re already pretty independent.”

“While doing my work and my brother’s work, sure,” you smile, “but not when it comes to living on my own.”

An idea crosses his mind and colors his cheeks, so he hums “You’ll be lonely.”

“I already feel that way at home… But I do love the idea of having a space all for myself.”

He hums again and then wipes the water from his eyes to send you a look.

“How much do you love it?”

“Jeong,” you say, laughing when you finally get what he’s suggesting, “we’re not moving in together.”

He pouts.

“Yet.”

He smiles at you again.

“Besides,” turning around, you let out a tired sigh when you catch the paint on your face and then you open the faucet to clean it off, “then Yeosang would miss you too much and he’ll blame me. I don’t want your friend to hate me.”

“He would never—”

You don’t let him dismantle your excuses “What is he up to with that documentary, anyway?”

He closes the shower and reaches for a towel the next second, not even bothering fully covering himself up when he gets out and you send him a look through the mirror, one he can’t decide if it’s in reproach or if it’s charged with something else. Probably both.

But he plays coy and tries his best to answer your question as he secures the towel around his hips.

“He’s doing this documentary about dance, he’s been working on it for a while. Obviously I’m the star of it,” he watches you roll your eyes and he bumps your arm with his in retaliation. “But my co-stars are taking all of his attention now. It’s kind of annoying.”

“And he finds them— your co-stars I mean,” your eyes roll again, “at the club?”

Yunho barely helps the laugh that spills out of his lips.

“No, um, that’s a completely different story. He keeps saying that he needs to film this one girl for the documentary but we all stopped believing him when he almost got beat up for filming her,” he explains, his hands brushing his wet hair back, “and he went back to do it again anyway.”

Your hip connects to the countertop again, your back to the mirror “So he’s in love?”

“I don’t think so. I think he’s… Intrigued.”

“Is she an exotic dancer or something?”

“What?”

“What?” you return, shrugging, “nothing wrong with stripping for a living.”

“I know, that’s not what I meant—”

“Do you have something against strippers, Yunho?” Your eyes narrow at him.

“N-no, of course I—”

“Oh, you don’t?”

“Princess…” He breathes out another laugh, a nervous chuckle this time. “Stop teasing me.”

Your frown slowly breaks into a smile and he shakes his head in disbelief.

“But you look so cute when you’re flustered!”

He stops messing with his hair to grab your hips and make sure you have nowhere to go, trapped between his body and the cold marble behind you.

“I’m not cute,” he says, low, almost in a whisper, “and I showered.”

“Yunho… Are you not hungry at all? You have to eat something.”

He wants to laugh again but he stops himself, his hands roaming your front and slipping to your legs when he kneels a little “Hm, I’m starving.”

Gasping when he kisses your middle through your shirt, you push him away with feign distress written all over your expression.

“Jeong!”

He gets back up again “What?”

“Are you going to be this much of a troublemaker when we live together? I have things to do!”

He stops, his hands holding your hips still and then you gasp again when he tugs and presses you against his body.

“You said when.”

You gulp “I know what I said.”

“You’re making plans for the future and I’m in them.”

“Well,” you titter with a nervous glint in your eye, but your chin is up the next second, “you know what? Yeah. Yes, I am, because I love—”

He presses his lips against yours before you finish your sentence and when he pulls away you push on his chest again.

“Annoying.” You say but you don’t mean it and he laughs, his arms going around you before you melt into his embrace fully.

“Do you want me to go with you?”

“Tomorrow?”

“Mhm.”

You think about it, he can feel you thinking as he rocks you both from side to side “No,” you finally say, in a whisper and then your next words come out firmer. “No, I need to do this on my own. I would love to see you later tomorrow night, though.”

“Hm, I have practice and then I promised to help Gyuri move in with Wooyoung but I can tell them that I’m in love and busy.”

“No, no,” you pull back, smiling a little, “Can I… I mean, I can help.”

He smiles as well “You want to?”

You nod.

“She has a bunch of shit but San is moving most of the stuff because, partially, it’s his fault she has to move, so.”

“Hm, how so?”

“Gyuri and his girlfriend live together, for years now, and now they want to move in with each other so Gyuri is forced to live with the embodiment of mischief while she finds an apartment she can afford.”

You laugh “I don’t think it bothers her that much.”

“Why?” He frowns and, at his question, you give him an incredulous look. “Why?”

“Baby, oh my God.”

He lets you go and you push him away fully, getting out of the bathroom.

“Do you know something I don’t?”

“Figure it out, dummy!”

He’s truly, genuinely and utterly confused, but the smile on his face hardly goes down as he watches you sit down in front of your painting again, from the bathroom door’s threshold.

And his heart aches for the pain you’re probably going to endure the next day.

When you enter the code to your front door, bag in hand, it’s almost lunch time. You didn’t let them know you’ll be returning today but you’re sure the way your suitcase falls at the dining room’s entrance is enough to alert them. Soohyun jumps a little, your mother lets out a scream and your father looks up from his phone slowly, gives you a look, and then looks back down.

“Oh, great, you’re back. Y/N, next time would you please let me know when you’re showing up so I can schedule your appointments accordingly— Kim Y/N!”

Your mother's scandalized scream is not what surprises you. What surprises you is the hug Soohyun gets up to give you, a tight squeeze that you smile into and then make a face at when he pulls away.

“You look beautiful,” he whispers to just you. “Don’t let her tell you otherwise.”

Nodding, you finally face your mother whose jaw is almost hitting the floor by now. Your father, as usual, is unbothered and tapping his fingers against the glass of the table, impatiently waiting for his food.

“Why do you mutilate yourself like this? And without notifying your team, nonetheless! We’ll have to… Get you some hair extensions for the shoot that you have—”

“No.”

She pauses, her jaw ticking and her eyebrow raising in warning. A few months ago, the mere thought of upsetting her would’ve sent you into a panic attack. Now, you stand your ground and curve your lips with pride, lift your chin up with courage and hold the handle of your suitcase a little tighter because you need it, because your hands tremble a little.

“Excuse me?”

“I said no,” you repeat yourself and your tone gains you your father's attention. “I’m sure the public can survive a haircut, mom. Can you?”

“Kim Y/N do not talk to me like that!”

She steps your way and your brother steps a side, giving you a wide eyed look that can only mean a here she goes again and you purse your lips to stop yourself from nervously laughing at it.

“You cut your hair, you leave for three months and come back all… All chubby,” oh, my god, “and you dare to speak to me that way?!”

The mention of your weight does send a little panic cruising through you. It has your father huffing from his seat and your brother snapping his head rapidly in your mother’s direction, a frown creasing his eyebrows and you can tell he’s about to say something but you stop him with a shake of your head.

And then you laugh.

You taste something bitter in your mouth and you can see the exact moment she notices her words are not affecting you the way they usually do.

“I think it’s time I move out,” you start, with a tiny, sardonic smile on your lips, “and I also think it is also time you think about the way you speak to me, mother. And I think you,” you turn to your father, “need to think about all the times you allowed her to talk to me that way.”

Your dad looks up, raises his eyebrows, hums and then looks back down again.

“Sure thing.” He says.

“What is happening right now?” your mother asks, a nervous chuckle coming out of her and after that she moves her hand, dismissing your point and turning to go to her seat again. “You’re talking nonsense. Go upstairs and wash. You’re obviously not having dinner, I hope.”

She’s always doing it on purpose, bringing you down like that on purpose, but right now? Right now she craves vengeance. You notice it in the way she looks for your reaction when she looks up.

“I am having dinner. Not here, not with you, not anymore.”

Your mother sighs, rubs her forehead with her thumb and her index “Kim Y/N, I beg, stop terrorizing me and—”

“She’s moving in with me.”

You turn to Soohyun, he gives you a look to signal you to follow his lead.

“She’s a little bit too grown up and independent to live under your roof still, mom. Dad?” He asks and your father looks up. “Don’t you agree?”

“Well,” your father cleans his throat, his back hitting the back of his chair as he thinks it over, “she is capable of being on her own. Besides, her room can make a wonderful office for you, dear.”

“Her room is staying hers because she’s not going anywhere!” Your mom stands up again, voice dark and tone painted over with something you’ve never even heard before. Not coming from her, at least: Fear. “Why do you suddenly want to move out? Is there…” She closes her mouth and then gulps, breathing out a laugh the next second. “Are you running away with someone, Y/N? Is that it? Did you fall in love on your little trip? You’re promised to someone!”

“Promised? I am not promised because we’re in the twenty-first century, mom!”

“To Yunho, Y/N! Don’t be stupid and tell your little fling to get lost!”

“Mom…” Soohyun warns but she laughs again, indignant.

“What? She knows this already. How would the Jeong’s feel if—”

“I don’t care what they feel!”

Your voice resonates in the room, it shuts everyone up, it makes your mom take a step back and your father blocks his phone, finally interested in what’s going on.

“I am with Yunho.”

Your mother smiles a second too late at what you said and opens her mouth, but you interrupt whatever nonsense she’s about to spew out.

“I am with him but not because you or his mother planned it. I’m not trying to fullfill your little fucked up fantasy—”

“Y/N!” She gasps at the cursing but you continue nonetheless.

“I am with him because I love him. I love him and he loves me and we are together because, against all odds, we ended up bonding and finding comfort and solace in each other. We made the choice, we did,” you insist on it, to let her know that it doesn’t matter if you two being together is exactly what she wanted, the final say is on you and Yunho alone. “I have something you two could never have and that’s companionship and true understanding that’s not rutted in power or in money. He… He made me realize we’re so much more than this.” You move your hands in the space between you and the rest of the room and your father hums a bitter sound in return.

“This,” your father gets up from his seat, hands going in the pockets of his dress pants and eyebrows raised with a sardonic edge to them that pisses you off, “is your family.”

“I know and that makes it worse,” you nod and the slow anger showing in his expressions grows just a tad bit more, so you go on before anyone else can interrupt you again. “Here’s what’s going to happen from now on, dad; If you want me to, I’ll keep working at the company, but Soohyun's responsibilities are solely his from now on,” you turn to your brother and he gives a fake pout but then he nods. “My job is simple, my job should allow me to focus on what I really want and, once I get what I really want, I'll make sure to find someone who can fit my spot so seemingly you won't even notice I'm gone.”

“I thought that what you wanted was to work for this company, Y/N.” Your father says.

“I thought so too,” you murmur back to him before shrugging, “but now I’m not so sure.”

A bit of pregnant silence passes. The air feels thick now that you told them your terms, your plan or what you allowed them to hear of it anyways. Like you told your boyfriend, there’s no need for them to know that you want to take classes or teach.

You’ll just do it. No need for their approval.

But your mother still grasps at the control she had on you three months ago. She holds on to it, desperately and, if you were someone else and the situation was any different, you would probably admire the strength it takes to stay this egotistical and delusional until the end.

She doesn’t seem to understand that her only daughter is running away from her. You’re not sure she cares, either and it hurts because, deep down, you expected to walk off with redemption on her side.

Sometimes, there’s no redemption at all from the people who hurt you.

And that’s also okay.

“Are you done?” She asks, looking around. “Are you all done with this nonsense?”

Taking in a breath, you try to tell her that what you said it’s what’s going to happen but she is not having it.

“No,” her finger is up and you raise your eyebrow at it, which gains you a raise on hers in return. “No. You’re not looking for a replacement and no you’re not moving out. That’s insane, Kim Y/N, that’s—”

“What’s my favorite color?” You interrupt to ask her and she stops, opening and closing her mouth while searching for an answer. “What’s my favorite sweet?”

“You don’t have one.”

“I do, I actually have two. What’s my favorite book? Movie? Song?” You turn to your dad this time. “What’s my favorite marketing strategy? Do you even know that one?”

Silence.

“You don’t know me enough to want to keep me here. I understand why you might think you do, but you don’t. Because, guess what? I’m an adult.”

Your mother opens her mouth and closes it again when you shake your head.

And although you’re not speaking to her anymore, you keep looking at your mother straight in the eye and you’re able to catch the exact moment she realizes she lost.

She lost.

“I’m an adult with a paying job and savings you didn’t need to know anything about. So you either take it or leave it. Dad?”

“You want me to decide now?”

You let out a bitter laugh “You can do whatever you want. Just know that I’m not settling for anything else but what I told you. I can either train someone or you can fire me and I can look for a new job,” you explain, “but either way I’m out of here.”

Your mother sighs and then mutters under her breath, but you catch it “What is everyone going to say?”

“I don’t care,” you tell her again and at the response she looks up, startled, like she didn’t expect you to keep going. “Now, I hope you have a lovely lunchr.”

You’re positively shaking when you step into the hallway and through the front door again, with your suitcase in your hand still and no actual plan on where you want to go. Maybe back to the hotel?

Mind reeling, it finally registers the fact that your mother turned to your father and pleaded him to do something for the sake of the family's image just before you stepped foot outside of the house. It was a screech of don't let her go, do something! laced with clear selfish concern.

You feel panic rising, closing your throat up and you feel lost, lost in what you just did, lost in what it actually means for you.

“Hey, hey.” Soohyun catches up to you quickly, his keys in his hands, his breath jagged like he escaped your mother’s claws because that’s probably what happened. “Sell out! You needed to signal me when you wanted to leave, dumbass!”

His eyes linger on your trembling hands when he takes the suitcase from you and you do your best to steady them.

“You didn’t have anything to eat.”

“I know. Where are you going?”

“To… I don’t really know. Yunho’s dorm?”

Soohyun laughs.

“You have a house, you know.”

“I think I’m very much homeless right now. I’m getting trapped and probably thrown in a cell if I go back inside.” You swallow tightly as the realization washes over you. “She’s so mad.”

“My house,” he clarifies, rolling his eyes. “I told them you’re moving in with me, didn’t I?”

“Soohyun…”

“I meant it,” there’s something soft in his eyes before he turns to open the main gate so you can both walk up to his car. “You can stay with me. Like you said, you’re grown and I won't have to look after you anymore.”

“Pfft,” that brings out a genuine laugh out of you, “anymore.”

“I remember running behind you in the garden because you couldn't keep still the second you learned how to walk!”

You look at him with a pout as he opens the trunk, throwing your bag in it without any care in the world.

Like an older brother would.

If your eyes turn watery, you make sure to swallow back the emotion before he can figure out why.

“Can I have my own room?”

“You have a room there already,” he admits, shrugging. “I mean, I thought about you when buying the apartment. Guhno usually stays there but I’m sure he can take the couch when he comes over and— Aw, Y/N!”

By the time he closes the trunk, you’re already crying. A little, enough for him to notice it.

“I don’t want to hear it. Open the door.”

“I’m so telling Yunho you cried!”

“Leave him out of it!” You push his shoulder, quickly getting into the car when he unblocks the doors and he does the same. “He’s staying over whenever he wants, by the way.”

Soohyun laughs, his eyes wide when he turns to you “Not a chance in hell, Kim Y/N.”

“Okay, then your boyfriend is not staying over either!”

“I don’t have a boyfriend!”

You muse, trying not to laugh “I’m telling Gunho oppa you’re denying your love to my face.”

Your brother lets out a sigh and then you squeak when he pulls your hair, playfully, before looking at you with the most sincere stare Kim Soohyun has probably given anyone ever.

“I’m really proud of you, kid.”

Pouting again, you look away and through the window as he pulls out of the curb and into the streets, the house you grew up in quickly fading into the background and your heart thumping hard against your ribs.

“Are you crying again?”

“Ugh,” you turn to him, tears running down your cheeks and a smile pulling at your lips, “you’re so annoying.”

Your clothes are now in your room at Soohyun’s (and yours) apartment, in the walk-in closet. Your brother's taste is nothing short of luxurious and obnoxious and the room is decorated in a way you would never think of decorating it but he swears he has someone who can fix it for me if he wants to.

He forgets that you already know Seonghwa but it's okay, because when you show up at Gyuri’s old apartment, you make sure to find him to tell him just that.

“I've literally told him that we both know Yunho and each other. Wasn't he the one who gave you my number?” Seonghwa asks, mouth hanging open a bit in surprise.

“He did, yes.”

Seonghwa huffs in amusement and you shrug a little “Well, do you want me to work in your room?” He asks after a few seconds and you smile, considering.

“I think I’m going to do it myself, Hwa.”

At the nickname, his smile widens and he nods. You think he’s about to say something else, however your attention drifts from your newfound friend and your eyes search for Yunho in the middle of the room, on the floor, as he takes a piece of furniture apart.

He’s wearing a dark grey crewneck that makes him look so deliciously good you can’t barely help your staring. There’s not one ounce of shame on your body and you’re sure it shows on your face because Seonghwa laughs besides you.

“So I didn’t paint over the tree,” he says and you frown, turning to him, “but I take you reconsidered my point anyway?”

“Oh, shut up.”

“It’s not going to happen,” the mockery in his tone while he tries to make an impression of you doesn’t offend you because you can see the intention behind it and it makes you laugh, roll your eyes and close your arms over your chest, like a child who just got caught. “It’s not going to happen, my ass. Look at you!”

“So I was wrong, who cares?”

“I do, I love being right.”

“He does,” Wooyoung comes into view from the kitchen, a drop of sweet doing his temple and into his cheek that Seonghwa wipes away like it’s nothing. “But I can say I called it first, remember? I’m never wrong.”

“You most certainly are,” Hwa says and you laugh at the expression Wooyoung makes to his friend, offended. Seonghwa turns to you. “He’s wrong most of the time.”

“Okay, that’s it, you’re helping me with the weird spice rack she insists on taking.” Wooyoung takes his elder arm and pulls, making you laugh and Seonghwa gasps.

“You’ve been working on that all afternoon!”

“She installed it herself so it’s all wonky, Hwa.”

Gyuri screams from behind a pile of clothes. You can't even see her even though you know she's standing up. “It is not wonky, Jung Wooyoung!”

Pursing your lips so you don't laugh at her predicament, you watch as Wooyoung silently communicates to Seonghwa that the space rack is, in fact, wonky and then you jump a little when arms close around you from behind.

“Stop complaining, Woo, you're going to have the pleasure to install it however you want later.” Yunho's voice is close to your ear and you hug the arms that hold you, melting into the embrace.

Gyuri laughs sharply when she registers what he said and Wooyoung makes a face at your boyfriend “I hate it here.”

“Sure you do, Wooyoung.” You nod at him, joking even though you don’t know him that well, and Seonghwa joins the tiny laugh you let out at the face Wooyoung gives you.

“I truly did not need a new addition to the group if I was going to get bullied by them as well.”

You fake offense, laughing a second later and Yunho swats a hand on his friend’s shoulder as he passes by you both and into the kitchen again. Seonghwa rolls his eyes before following Wooyoung into the kitchen as well.

Yunho breathes out, his lips finding your cheek “How are you feeling?”

Turning to him, you smile a little. You know he’s asking about what went a little earlier today.

“I’m good, baby,” you whisper back, leaning in a little and kissing him tenderly on the lips. He reciprocates but when you pull away you can see the concern in his eyes. “I promise. I already knew how she was going to react.”

“Me too but that doesn’t make it any less fucked up, Princess.”

“I know,” letting out a sigh, you turn to the living room again and the corners of your lips lift at the mess. “But I’m out of the house and I’m alright now.”

“My mom texted me to congratulate us.”

“Oh?” You don’t turn to him again but your eyebrows raise in surprise. “Did you answer?”

“No,” he breathes out a laugh, “but I should.”

“We can’t run from them forever, Yun,” you feel him nod against you and, finally, you turn around completely to face him. His hands find your waist, his lips curve as he watches you over and you do the same. “Also, you’re banned from my house.”

His smile drops.

“Huh?”

“Soohyun doesn’t want you sleeping over.”

“What did I do?”

You hear someone laughing behind you and Gyuri comes into view a second later “You’re the official boyfriend now, Yunho, you lost your sleeping over privileges.”

“I never had them to begin with!”

“Well—” The sound of glass breaking stops her in her tracks and she goes a little pale at what it means. “Call the police, I’m committing a murder and then turning myself in.”

And then she disappears into the kitchen as well. Faintly, you can hear Seonghwa laughing. You hold onto Yunho, fingers threading softly into the strands of hair on his neck.

“They’re not helping us when we move in together.”

Yunho laughs.

“When we move in together we’re going to hire professionals.”

“Exactly.”

“And Seonghwa can do the interior design of the main part of the house but we can handle our room and studios by ourselves.”

“Mhm.”

There’s that slight glint of concern that crosses his expression again when you take in a deep breath, but you shake your head so he can let go of it.

“We’ll be okay, Yun. We are okay.”

You watch him swallow tightly but then he nods. There’s a lot you both should be concerned about right now but, as you hear Wooyoung scream from the kitchen and a loud smack against the wall nearest to you, you both silently decide to be in the moment.

It doesn’t really matter what hardships you go through, as long as you’re together.

“Against all odds,” you insist, “we’ll be alright.”

I love them and I'm so sad to let them go but hey! that's life! If you read all the way down hear, thank you so, so much. Don't be afraid to go into my askbox to make comments, suggestions, etc! I will take everything into account for my other stories. Thank you!

#jeong yunho x y/n #jeong yunho smut #jeong yunho x reader #jeong yunho imagines #jeong yunho #yunho fluff #yunho fanfic #yunho smut #yunho x y/n #yunho x you #yunho x reader #jeong junho fluff #ateez fluff #ateez icons #ateez x reader #ateez #ateez fanfic #ateez fic #ateez reactions

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be-xkyy · 2 days ago

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Hello! Since I read your Yandere stories, my head began to ask these questions, how many children do our yanderes want to have for us? Would they get a little jealous when our babies are feeding from us?

Hii Dear Anon!

First of all I'm glad you liked my content, thank you! And secondly, your question is very good Anon, although this will be a bit short, I hope you like it! 🖤

How many children would the yanderes have with reader? Would they be jealous of their children?

Tagging list: @kthehoeforfictionalmen ★ @dreamlessnight ★ @riawrld ★ @darkuni63 ★

Yandere Farmer Link

This man definitely wants lots of kids, five or six at the very least and about nine or ten at the most, I think he'd mostly prefer to have boys (since he thinks they're easier to handle) but he wouldn't mind having one or two girls, he has a big farm so he doesn't worry about space and he makes enough money from the cattle and crops to support them all.

As for being jealous of his children when they're breastfed or jealous in general, I don't think so. I honestly don't think he's the "Stay away son, she's mine" type but he also wouldn't let you have much time with the kids especially if they're boys since if you spoil them too much he thinks you'll make them "weak" and "mama's boys" which he doesn't want, so when they learn to walk he'll take them with him to do the farm chores.

"The kids are coming to work with me today. What if they're three and four? That's the perfect age to start getting to know everything, don't question me."

Yandere Cowboy Link

He would want at least 3 children, two boys and a girl, although he might want more, depending on his mood.

And regarding getting jealous when watching his child eat or in general, I think he would get a little jealous, although he would try to be playful and downplay it, saying things like "He's a little chubby, don't you think you feed him too much?" Or "Look, it's 1 PM, isn't it time for a nap? Come on, son, it's time to sleep." Of course you don't let him take the baby away, it's not his bedtime yet.

"Baby doll, when I was a child I was fed and put to sleep at any hour even if I didn't want to, and look at me, everything turned out fine!"

Yandere Dilf Link

This poor man wants to have two girls, two little princesses that look like you, he already has one son so you'd rather have girls but he doesn't care if one is a boy or if they both end up being boys (although not having a daughter that looks like you would break his heart) he's one of the few yanderes that promises to have only two children and keeps it. He doesn't force you to have more even if the ones you give birth to aren't the gender he wanted.

Well now I don't think he would get jealous of his children while breastfeeding, rather I think he would touch the baby's head while breastfeeding even leaving kisses on its chubby cheek, although seeing you breastfeeding might excite him a little (he has a thing for tits and milk, okay?) but he wouldn't try anything at that moment on the contrary he would try to hide it.

"You're so pretty little girl... look at that little nose and those round cheeks... you're so precious sweetheart... just like your mommy"

Yandere Sugar Daddy Link

Another one who wants to have two kids, only he wants to have a pair a boy and a girl, no more kids, just two. Not one more, not one less. I think he would have favoritism with his girl and the boy would be more attached to you as a result.

He would get jealous, he doesn't even want to hide it, although he would be more mean if the one you were breastfeeding was the boy, he would stare from the leather chair right in front of you, watch you rub the baby's head while he eats and make comments like "You don't rub my head when I suck on your boobs, don't rub his head either" or "You know there are high end milks on the market made from breast milk, why don't we try giving him that instead of your milk?" if you scold him or look at him the wrong way he would throw up his hands in surrender and say in an offended voice.

"Hey! Don't look at me like that! You should be grateful that I care, that brat will make your tits sag!"

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drdemonprince · 2 days ago

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do you think it's worth it being nonbinary if you dont have like, body/physical dysphoria? Ive been identifying as nonbinary since i was 14 and when i was in high school it was great, i had my little liberal bubble queer friend group, and the rest of the school didnt pay much attention to me. My mom accepted me in the "i dont get it but whatever i dont want you to stop talking to me so i guess ill go along with it" sense, which while not perfect, its fine. But last september i started studying engineering and. Its really not going well. Like 85% of my classmates are straight guys and they range from thinking nonbinary people are cringe (and therefore they make fun of me when i walk by) to being extremely transphobic (im very scared of some of them.) And ive been trying to make friends with the girls in my class, and some of them are nice, but i can tell they also dont like that im nonbinary. One of them literally told me "i get that being a woman is hard, i dont like having periods or the ways guys look at me either, but you dont gain anything by denying yourself". So. I kind of think about that nearly every night now. Doubting whether im really nonbinary. And it really doesnt help knowing that basically every girl here either thinks that or just straight up thinks im gross and weird, ive literaly heard one of them go 'what is THAT doing in the womens' when i walked past her from the bathroom. I dont like going to class much.

Im thinking of detransisioning, i guess. I never started taking hormones (good luck getting those in eastern europe lol), so I could easily start looking like a cis girl again. These will be my coworkers and bosses, i cant live like this until i retire. i want to have fun uni experiences too. And ive been thinking so much lately about why im even doing this. Its just a few words that people call me by. Theres nonbinary people who use binary pronouns and pass as cis, i could be one of them and just not tell anyone that im actually nb. but on the other hand, it feels like im giving up on the trans community if i do this. Giving up on activism. Im sure im not the only one in this situation, if i detransition ill be letting them down completely. I dont want the next generation to be as fucked as this one. Also i came out very publicly to my entire class (i wanted to find other queer people to be friends with, i hoped that would do the trick maybe. I was so naive and stupid) and it will be so fucking humiliating to go back on that and im scared ill do all that and theyll keep treating me the same anyways because im already "tainted" by transness. So i would let so many people down for nothing.

The one other trans friend from my high school friend group solved this issue by paying more than ten fucking thousand euros per year to study in the netherlands btw. The exchange rate to our currency makes it somehow even worse than it sounds. Hes probably going to be able to start taking hormones before he gets his bachelors. I wish my mom was that rich :|

First of all, I want to say that I am so sorry anon that you are facing so much fucking exclusion and harassment. That kind of treatment pushes a lot of trans people into detransitioning, and it is brutal, and that this experience can happen to nonbinary people who are not on hormones but have otherwise transitioned is something that does not get acknowledged enough.

I can't tell you what you should do in your situation, because no outcome is great. But I think you might find some elements of this article from Kier Adrian Grey on ceasing their use of they/them pronouns (among the cis public!) interesting. They're an "ex anarchist" and a bit of an anti social justice dogma kinda person so I don't agree with them on many things, but I did like this point that they made:

"Hear me out: maybe the best way to understand they/them pronouns, within the context of a pluralistic democracy, is as a subcultural norm, a way for LGBT people to show respect for one another within our community. That sense of belonging I felt when I first found queer spaces was profound, and if using gender-neutral pronouns gives someone that gift, I am all for it. "But I do wonder if we are setting people up for hardship when we tell them that they should hope for, expect, or insist on they/them pronouns being used by everyone they encounter, and that they will be emotionally injured every time this fails to happen. In my thirteen years, misgendering was rarely malicious, and yet it still fed into a wounded identity and a suspicious worldview."

I don't think that what Kier has written about their experience applies to even most nonbinary people, and if taken too prescriptively by the wrong people it could be an awful dysphoria cope that leads a person to some pretty dark places. But! For someone whose feelings about it all are like Kier's, and whose life experiences have given them similar perspective, I think there is something to it. It's true that thinking a great deal about how one is gendered by others is crazy making and sometimes isolating, and if that's the sole way in which one's transness interfaces with the world, it's not always to the person's net benefit.

Here's the full piece:

I will say that based on all you had to say, anon, it would be a lot better for you if you could get around a lot of queer and trans people! What you're struggling with is not being seen and appreciated for who you are, and all the cis people undermining you are driving you crazy and making you doubt yourself. I'd MUCH prefer if you could find more local queer community or relocate if necessary to feel more appreciated as you are.

BUT if you find yourself resonating with this author's points and it feels like only being out to other trans and queer people would be good for you, that is okay to do. That isn't "detransitioning," it's being choosy about whom you trust. And many of us navigate those decisions. I'm not out as trans to everyone I meet! Most people just think I'm a cis guy. The big difference between you and me is that I have medically transitioned (and if you want to, I recommend ordering some hormones on India Mart!!!). You have some choices here about how much information you give to other people, how much you trust people who are incredibly ignorant, how much you will expose yourself to harm by making requests for treatment that might not happen, and how to build the community you need to survive this awful transphobic reality.

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mingoooossii · 2 days ago

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Y. Ga Min headcanons.

Kdrama: study group

Warnings: fluff, messy writing??(not exaggerating) not really structured

A/n: word vomit basically. i had LOT of thoughts so yeah it's messy (i wanted to write a lot more but i stopped myself) 🫥 I hope it's readable atleast but anyways I love ga min he's so adorable. also tagging my pookie @slytherinshua

Words: 755

⊹ ࣪ ˖ Before dating.

• you two started off as just classmates (one that he admired)

• you were pretty, kind AND smart!!!

• how could anyone not like you??

• though that admiration soon grew into something more

• the way his heart tightens a little whenever you meet his eyes

• or the way he couldn't help but let his eyes linger on you even during lessons

• he couldn't figure out why (might even conclude that he's sick)

• i feel like he wouldn't even realise that he has a crush until Se hyeon points it out (bless his soul)

• *short circuits*

• at first, he wouldn't know what to do (he's only been interest in studies his whole life, don't blame him-)

• but i can see him be more shy around you after that

• he tries to be discreet but fails

• exposes himself without even realising it 😭 (are we surprised)

• he's just a cutie, okay?

• also wouldn't think of the possibility that you might actually like him back???

• you most definitely confessed first (after all the hints you've dropped, you got impatient)

• surprised that you actually like him back (but is also very happy)

• he'd want to be the absolute best boyfriend to you 🥹🥹

⊹ ࣪ ˖ In a relationship.

• after getting together with you, he'd want to be romantic

• the kind that makes you swoon at every step

• takes inspiration from mangas (we're talking about GRAND gestures, it's just so amazing to him)

• but eventually gives up after a disapproving talk with Se hyeon (and an even more disapproving glance from Ji wu)

• he's trying his best okay :((

• but he's actually more charismatic than what he gives himself credit for

• the type to make you shy with his actions which he doesn't even consider as romantic

• unintentional rizz??

• notices every little thing about you

• you got a haircut? he notices and compliments you

• you got a new hair clip? he buys you several cute ones saying it would fit you

• this also applies to his memory btw

• he'd remember the little things you'd say (even if it's not that important to you)

• because it's important to him

• also crazy eye contact

• yes he'd be shy but nothing beats his eye contact, it's just so important to him

• doesn't realise how much it flusters you 🫠

• loves affection

• hugs, kisses, headpats whatever it is he LOVES it

• but he does has a soft spot for headpats or just you simply running your hand through his hair

• he has insanely soft hair so it kind of became your habit to touch his hair whenever

• the first time you did it, he was kind of baffled

• but after that he began to love it and even crave it (your hands were just so comforting)

• so please give him headpats!! (or else he'll stare at you with his boba eyes until you do, yes this is a threat)

• though he, himself is somewhat on the shy side with affection, he loves to hold your hand

• like i said earlier, he finds your hands warm and comforting so he feels at ease whenever he holds your hand

• he also likes it when you compliment him

• definitely the type to think back on it before giggling to himself (he's so cute help)

• study dates are an absolute must!!

• loves it when you help him with his doubts (definitely stares at you with his shiny eyes when you explain something)

• he gets to spend time with you and study at the same time, it's perfect to him.

• he's not really the type to get jealous

• though he does have his moments, he trusts you so that's what matters

• but he won't hesitate to step in if he sees that you're uncomfortable in any way

• tries not to get into a fight but absolutely will if it's necessary

• will introduce you to his mom pretty early on in your relationship

• he'd be a bit worried about it, thinking she's gonna disapprove

• though she wasn't exactly ecstatic when she found out, she wouldn't express it

• but she'd end up liking you after seeing that you were a positive influence (and you made him genuinely happy, so that's all that matters to her)

gen taglist: @mayflyfr

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wlwsoccerfics · 3 days ago

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Approved(HannahHamptonXBronzeReader)

A/N: Hope you enjoy this little OS.

Summary: you tell your sister that you are dating Hannah.

"Babe do we really have to tell Lucy?" Hannah asked, sitting on your lap. Pouting softly.

"yes we should tell her! I mean i am pretty sure she knows already! We have 'sleepovers' in my room every night! And we were attached to the hip at Camp! So i am certain she is aware we are more than besties!" You answered and kissed the pout away.

Probably everyone knew you were more than Friends because you literally are always together. Both, Day and night!

"okay that's true! We are not exactly settle about it!" She admitted.

"exactly! Besided have are you scared or Lucy or why is this such a big deal to you?" You asked her. She was biting down on her bottom lip.

"well Lucy can be scary!" Hannah stated.

"wait really? I don't think my sister is scary! Protective yes! But scary? I don't think so! Besides you don't plan on hurting me so you have nothing to worry about!" You Tell her, kissing her gently. She kissed you back. Things got a bit more heated and intense. But that was cut short when both Lucy and Millie stood in the doorway of the livingroom.

"get a room!" Millie said and chuckled softly. Lucy was laughing.

"so when did you want to officially tell me that the two of you are an Item?" Your sister asked while you and Hannah pull away from one another.

"Lucy! I am dating Hannah! Have been for a while! Now it's official!" You told her. Hannah blushed softly.

"yeah what she said! I promsie you Lucy i will treat her with respect! No worries!" Hannah answered.

"didn't expect anything else! But that goes both ways! I know y/n treats you like that as well. It has been obvious for a while, that you are more then just Friends." Lucy said with a soft chuckle.

"yeah like everyone knows you are together! Cause for Friends with benefits you are way too close as well!" Millie told the two of you. You blushed a bit at the words of your Team Captain. Yes you also play for Chelsea.

"thanks for the insight of what we look like to Others!" Hannah stated. You laughed at that.

"yeah thanks Lucia, thanks Millie!" You replied.

"you are very much Welcome!" Lucy told you, grinning softly.

The four of you ordered some Chinese food and watched a movie before you went upstairs to your room with Hannah.

"the walls are thin! So keep it down!" Lucy yelled upstairs.

"f*ck Off, Lucia!" You yell playfully, hearing Millie laugh at that.

You cuddle up with Hannah after the two of you put on some oversized T-Shirts. Putting on a Podcast on your phone.

"that was an interesting Talk!" Your girlfriend spoke up, you smile at her, playing with her fingers.

"yes it was. but it went quite well!" You replied, happy with how this turned out.

"agreed. It went really well. Didn't expect that!" Hannah said.

"told you that people already knew! We sucked at hiding it!" You answered with a giggle.

You talked for a little longer before falling asleep. You didn't even hear Millie leave because the two of you were out like a light.

#hannah hampton x bronze reader #woso request #woso x reader #woso fic #chelsea reader x lucy bronze #lucy bronze x bronze reader #chelsea reader x chelsea women

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innerchorus · 2 days ago

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are there differences between shapul and esfan? theyre the same character to me.

It took me a while to figure out how I wanted to respond to this mainly because it sounds like something my partner would say to antagonise me but let me give it my best shot.

I do think there are some differences between them (and I will of course mention those in this post) but I think it's more interesting to answer this question by looking at why these two characters are so alike, and specifically why the fact that they are so alike doesn't mean they are merely cardboard cutouts of each other and is vital to understanding them as characters.

First, while Shapur created a strong impression and is an important character to myself and many others, it's worth noting that he appears in relatively few scenes in the manga. That's enough to glean some info about what he's like as a character, but we don't get to spend as much time with him as we do with the main cast. Maybe that's part of why you feel this way.

We do, however, get to see a bit more of his younger brother, Isfan.

When you say that Shapur and Isfan are so alike they seem the same to you, my first response is pretty much "well, what did you expect, given the circumstances?". It's clear from the outset that Isfan wishes to follow in his brother's footsteps.

Here he is in Chapter 59, freshly arrived in Peshawar.

Straight away we learn he wants to avenge his brother's death and offer his service to Prince Arslan in his brother's stead.

From Chapter 64, right before his fight with Gieve.

Here we learn that not only did Shapur save Isfan, he actually taught him. The novels even mention that 'while his brother served as a military general in the royal capital, Isfan became an agent of the royal capital and stayed in his hometown to guard it,' so even before we meet him in the manga, Isfan was stepping into a role that had previously been occupied by his brother, a role that Shapur had trained him for.

It's very clear that Isfan looks up to his brother, idealises him and aspires to be the kind of person he was, not just in a military sense but also sharing his morals, viewing loyalty to one's country and protecting the weak as far more important than riches (as stated in Book 12 of the novels, this is something Shapur said that Isfan adheres to as well). Is it such a surprise that after being so closely taught by Shapur and clearly modelling himself on him, Isfan seems so like his older brother?

That's really why I think saying they're 'the same character' feels reductive, because the reasons why they are so similar tell you so much about them.

And despite Shapur appearing in only a few scenes before his death, the same thing works in reverse. When we meet Isfan, we also learn more about Shapur. I don't think there's any need to list it all as that's not really what your question was aimed at, but I hope you understand my point.

The two brothers do seem to share character traits (they can be hotheaded/rash, as seen with Isfan's fight against Gieve, him rushing hastily to attack Chassum Fortress, and in Shapur throwing down his helmet at Atropatene after learning the king had fled, and particularly in his rescue of Isfan where he rushed alone into the snowy mountains to save him) but again, they're related, sharing the same father. So it's not really a surprise. This does, however, also highlight a difference between them, one that comes down to age and experience.

When we meet Shapur, he's in his mid 30s, and a Marzban, one of the highest military positions possible in Pars.

When we meet Isfan, he's around 20, and although he's clearly got some combat experience he's not at his brother's level just yet. And while they share some traits like I outlined above, while Shapur likely had the age and experience to moderate his reactions a little bit (see how he backtracks after his initial outburst at Atropatene, and defers his conflict with Kubard for another day which never comes), Isfan doesn't, and on certain occasions (like rushing ahead at Chassum) his inexperience shows.

I also want to cover character design, because I think it's a deliberate choice by Arakawa to have there be some resemblance between the two but not have them appear totally identical. One, it highlights that Isfan has a different mother (the manga appears to give him her lighter hair colour), and two, I think it indicates that Isfan isn't just Shapur v2, he's not meant to be just a carbon copy of his brother. Maybe that's also why we haven't seen Isfan wield a spear, Shapur's weapon of choice.

That those visual differences highlight the difference in their birth circumstances feels important. Shapur was born into high status as his family's heir. Isfan was born to a enslaved mother and if not for Shapur's actions his father would have allowed him to die simply to pacify his wife. While Isfan now occupies the same privileged position that his brother grew up in, it could easily have been different.

Those circumstances (Isfan and his mother's abandonment in the mountains) also lead to a distinct difference between the two, which is fighting style. Okay, we don't see much of Shapur in combat but he's clearly a classically trained Parsian warrior. This is likely the nature of the training he gave Isfan, too. But Isfan has an element that is unique to him, something that wasn't influenced by his brother but relates to wolves.

In his fight with Gieve, Tanaka describes Isfan's movements as 'wolf-like' and in both the novel scene and Arakawa's manga adaptation, Gieve is surprised by Isfan's movements (specifically the kick seen below) which depart from orthodox swordsmanship with the unpredictability of the wild.

I don't think we would've seen Shapur pull a move like that!

Yes, I know it makes no sense for Isfan to have these wolf-like traits when the actual contact he had with them was very limited, but I'll forgive Tanaka this conceit because it's fucking cool okay?

Anyway I hope this satisfactorily answers the question. I'm aware I am very (very) into these two characters and not everyone will be as interested in them as I am, but I hope some of the the points in this post were of interest. Hopefully I didn't forget anything, I didn't get a chance to proofread!

#arslan senki #the heroic legend of arslan #shapur #isfan #before Isfan's debut I joked about his design being like Shapur but with one braid but actually that would have been Bad #(and then we got a flashback to Shapur with one braid lmao)#anyway I tried really hard to avoid veering into headcanons here #oh and also it really feels like Isfan's responses always bear a trace of Shapur's influence #like when he immediately kneels in Arslan's presence after his duel with Gieve #his reaction is in part due to the strength of his brother's loyalty to the royal family causing him to feel regret and shame #but things were different for Shapur #because even if he looked up to his father he went against the wishes of his parents to do the right thing and save Isfan #(maybe I shouldn't bury this in the tags but I wrote an entire essay already)#(please think of it as a bonus)

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badnewswhatsleft · 1 day ago

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total guitar #174 april 2007 (part of a feature on signature guitars)

transcript below cut:

JOE TROHMAN: Washburn Idol WI26 Interview by Henry Yates

How long did it take to develop your signature model? "It took a good six months and I went through three or four prototypes that were vastly different to how the guitar actually turned out. I went into the workshop originally, but by three months into the process I was on tour so I had to do a lot via email. I can't say I was the easiest person to work with. My ideas changed as the prototypes arrived. But once I saw the final guitar I was pretty happy with it."

What makes the perfect electric guitar, and how close does your signature model get? "I like something that's function over form. I have a lot of really old Les Pauls at home, so I've always liked a bare-boned guitar. You've got two pickups, two volumes, two tones, a pickup selector and that's it. At this stage in my life, I'd say my Washburn is perfect. It has a very thin body, but when you plug it in it sounds awesome. It plays well, especially given how much I jump about. I don't feel dumb holding it."

Did you know what you wanted when you were approached to make a signature guitar? "At first, I was surprised that somebody wanted to make a guitar with me — I felt like only one in a million guitarists got to make a signature model. I went through a load of weird ideas before going with something classic that would be a real road warrior. I also wanted to keep the price down, so that kids can afford it."

Be honest, how important was it that your guitar looked kick-ass? "I think 'classic' is the word, but I guess people do come up and tell me it looks cool… The fret inlays are keyholes. We had keyholes on the From Under The Cork Tree inlay — it's the idea of the all-powerful, all-watching eye, like on the one-dollar bill."

Have you ever popped into a music shop and tried your own guitar? "I hope to be able to do that. The plan is that people will be able to buy exactly the same guitar as the one I'm playing live. I think that's the cool thing — when someone buys a Slash Les Paul or a Scott Ian Washburn, they want that exact guitar, so I think you've got to make the guitar you sell the same as your own or you're kinda cheating."

Finally, is there anything you'd change about your signature model? "Right now, it's perfect. I think next time around I might try to make something that looks a bit more vintage — in Tobacco Burst or something — and try to get the vibe of a Les Paul Custom. I think I'll play it for a very long time. I played it all through our last tour and nobody expected it to be this good. Even my tech was surprised!"

#time capsule #read the charts #joe trohman #fall out boy #media blitz

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organic-bloodbath · 7 hours ago

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Knife Princess - Part 4

Chishiya x Reader

Summary: You and Chishiya reunite with your friends – and also the King of Spades.

Warnings: Heavy angst. Hold my hand. It's sad.

A/N: I'm sorry.

Part 1 ♡ Part 2 ♡ Part 3

♤♡♧◇

You and Chishiya had ended up into an old thrift shop of sorts. It had been raining very heavily earlier, so you had gone inside the first building you were able get into, just to get to the safety from getting completely soaked.

You helped yourself with some new clothes hanging on the racks, not wanting to stay in your wet shirt and shorts and catch a flu – like that was your biggest problem here.

"So, what do you think?" you asked, holding two shirts, one in each hand. The other one was pastel pink and the other dark green. "Which color suits me better?"

"Green," Chishiya said, not giving it much thought as in thinking the answer was obvious. "Pink is too girly for a badass like you."

"You think i'm a badass, hm?"

"I know you are, i've witnessed it with my own eyes," he confirmed.

"I'm touched," you smiled and pulled your old shirt over your head, feeling Chishiya's gaze lingering on your upper body. A playful smirk spread on your face. "You know, it's rude to stare when a woman is changing her clothes."

"Can't help it when you're doing it right in front of me," Chishiya stated, having no shame looking at you now.

"When we get back home," you said when you had changed into new clothes, "what do you want to do first?"

Chishiya was quiet for a moment. "I haven't given it much thought. Getting home always seemed to be so far, no matter how much we progressed through the games," Chishiya answered, furrowing his brows a little. "What about you?"

"First, a long hot bath," you sighed, already daydreaming of all the bubbles and warmth embracing your body. "Then, have a fresh and delicious, homemade dinner. Something else than expired protein bars or having to hunt down food by your own hands."

"Sounds almost too good to be true," he smiled. "Your expectations sound a little too high."

"I hope you'll join me though," you suggested.

"The bath or dinner?" he asked, lifting his left eyebrow in amusement.

"Both," you said and wrapped your arms around his neck.

"Perhaps," he mused and was about to grab your waist until you looked over his shoulder and your eyes widened. "What?"

You pushed him away and walked to the back of the room to an old gramophone record player.

"Oh my gosh. Does this thing work?" you asked, brushing the dust off its surface.

There was pile of old records next to it which nobody had touched in ages, probably in years by the looks of it. You started going through them, one by one. Chishiya only looked at you, leaning against the wall, without interrupting you. He loved seeing you so excited about something and only watched you in awe.

You ended up pulling one of the records in your hand, admiring its cover on the front and back.

The gramophone was old, definitely one of those vintage items. Chishiya had never used one of those but you seemed to know how it was supposed to work. As you pressed the needle gently on top of the black record, it started playing music. It was a slow song. You looked into Chishiya's eyes and smiled, excitement clear on your face, which made Chishiya suspicious.

"Chishiya," you said slowly and took his hand, pulling him towards you. "Dance with me."

"What?"

"Dance with me."

"I don't dance," he refused and shook his head, trying to subtly back away from you.

"Come on, just one song," you insisted.

"Y/N, i don't-"

"Come onnnnn," you groaned. "Don't be a buzzkill."

"I'm not-"

"Take my hand," you commanded him, not taking a 'no' for an answer.

"Y/N, i really don't-" Chishiya started but the sad and pouting look on your face made his heart melt a little. He let out a deep sigh. "Fine. One song."

He didn't look happy but you didn't care, you'd get the grumpiness out of him in no time.

Chishiya took your hand in his, putting his other hand on your waist. He was stepping on your toes as your bodies moved together, trying to stay in sync, which made you laugh.

"Don't laugh at me, i'm trying," he mumbled, looking surprisingly concentrated on his steps but still failing.

Chishiya knew that if Kuina and the others were here to witness this moment, they would definitely make fun of him, he could imagine the picture in his mind. Chishiya didn't get embarrassed easily, if ever, but stumbling on you and looking like a disaster of a dancer managed to make him a little embarrassed if there was anyone to see him – other than you.

"It's cute," you chuckled. "Now, spin me."

Chishiya let go of your waist, spinning you around under his arm. He then pulled your body back against his, your back against his chest, his arms around your waist. Chishiya let his chin rest on your left shoulder.

"Look at you, you're a pro after all," you praised him.

"I suppose i have many hidden talents," Chishiya hummed.

"Yeah? Name a few more of them," you challenged him.

"You'll have to find out later."

"I see you want to act all mysterious," you smirked.

"Can't be too predictable."

"That you definitely aren't," you agreed. "I have many hidden talents too, you know."

"I'm sure you do since you keep surprising me over and over again," he said and lifted his brows.

"Good."

Both of you fell silent for a while, only looking into each other's eyes. He was still holding you behind your back, squeezing you tight against him.

"Can i ask you a question?" you asked. "Like, a serious one?"

"Hm?"

"What really happens when we get home? Like, between us. Everything's going to be different."

"Well," Chishiya said, looking away from you for a second. You turned around to face him better now. He turned his gaze back to your eyes. "What do you want to happen?"

"I don't know," you said shyly. "I want to have you there though. I don't want you to leave."

"Hm," he hummed. "Well, i don't want you to leave either."

"For real?" you asked and bit your lip, reaching to put a strand of his blond hair behind his ear. "So, you admit you like me?"

"Do i need to say it outloud?" he asked. "My actions of kissing and holding you aren't enough?"

"Come on, admit it," you smiled. "Sometimes people might kiss someone but doesn't genuinely like them."

Chishiya took a deep breath. "Fine. I like you, Y/N."

"Doesn't sound very convincing," you teased, narrowing your eyes.

"It doesn't, hm?" Chishiya asked. "What would convince you then? Want me to take you on a proper date?"

"You make it sound like you are obliged to do that."

"Trust me, i'll never do anything i don't want to do," he promised.

"So, you do want to take me out?" you asked, slight blush creeping its way on your cheeks.

"Unless it involves dancing," he corrected and let out a laugh. "You saw how bad i was at that."

"I wasn't thinking about that but now i do want to go dancing with you," you smirked and played with his hair a little more. "And you weren't that bad."

"Anything else," he insisted.

You let out a dramatic sigh. "Fine..."

"I do enjoy your company," Chishiya confirmed. "So, i don't really mind what we do, but dancing is off limits."

"What do you enjoy about my company?" you teased him.

"Everything," he whispered with a warm smile which made your cheeks feel warm.

You weren't sure when the music had stopped but it was suddenly completely quiet in the background.

♤♡♧◇

You walked forward next to Chishiya, not really knowing what your exact destination was right now.

"So, when i was –"

You were interrupted when you noticed a familiar figure in the distance. Both of you stopped and only looked at the person ahead of you for a moment. A relief washed over your body for seeing a familiar face.

"Arisu?" you gasped.

"Fancy meeting you here," Chishiya said.

"Y/N? Chishiya?" Arisu asked, genuinely surprised.

"I had a pretty good hunch that you were still alive," Chishiya admitted to Arisu, who eyed Chishiya for a moment.

"You're a lot less grumpy now," Arisu commented, making Chishiya laugh.

"That's on me," you smiled, proud of yourself.

"Less grumpy, huh? Well, we've been through hell of a lot." Chishiya slowly walked closer to Arisu, hands in his pockets. "Can i admit something to you?"

"Yeah?"

"Well, i–" Chishiya started, but was interrupted by a gunshot, which made all three of you flinch. The gunshot was aimed at Chishiya, who now fell on the ground, red spot growing on his white hoodie. Chishiya was holding his stomach, leaning on his elbow on the ground.

"Yo!" someone shouted in the distance.

"Chishiya!" you shrieked in horror, instantly kneeling down next to him. Arisu pointed his gun towards the person who was approaching you now.

"I thought i'd never see you again." Niragi pointed a gun towards Arisu. "I'm so fucking happy."

"Niragi?" you mumbled in disbelief. He was the last person you expected to see anymore, thinking him and Aguni had burned with the mansion. "You're alive?"

"Why do you sound surprised? Can't get rid of me that easily," he responded with a smirk.

"Should have guessed," you said, rolling your eyes.

"What, you're not happy to see your dear brother, hm?" Niragi asked. "I sure missed you so much, little sunshine."

"I'm so happy to see you, dear brother who shot me twice," you responded sarcastically.

"I shot you?" Niragi asked, furrowing his eyebrows, genuinely confused.

"At the Beach, yes," you spat and crossed your arms on your chest.

"You sure it was me?" Niragi narrowed his eyes. You just gave him an annoyed look. "Fine, you want me to apologise or something?"

"That would be nice, sure."

"I mean, you look alive and well so no permanent harm done," Niragi shrugged. You sent him another poisonous look, making him roll his eyes. "Alright, I'm sorry."

"Mhm," you hummed, not satisfied at all but tired of dealing with his attitude. You eyed him from head to toe. "You look a little crispy."

"This is what fire does to human flesh, sunshine," Niragi said back sarcastically, the tone matching yours. "Anyway, let's begin – our own murder game."

"Our own what now?" you asked, sure you hadn't heard him correctly.

"Not that there's anything else for the three of us to do here." Niragi glanced at you and winked. "You're sitting this one out, sweetheart. It's just between us guys."

"You want to start a game between the players?" Chishiya asked, even him sounding surprised.

"The three of us are the same. Social outcast. Losers. Yet we still want to know how it feels to be alive," Niragi explained, but then he coughed and spat blood on the ground by his feet. "I don't have very much time left." Niragi wiped his mouth on his sleeve. "Do me one last favor. One more game."

Chishiya and Arisu glanced at each other.

"Come on, I thought you guys were my bros!" Niragi groaned, raising his voice.

Niragi threw a gun for Chishiya, who stepped forward to pick it up.

"Sounds like fun. Arisu, what do you think?"

"What do you mean?" Arisu looked as lost and shocked as you.

"Come on, i know you have a bone to pick with me. Might as well deal with it right now."

"Chishiya, what the hell is wrong with you?" you whispered to him and grabbed him by his shoulder, turning him to look at you. "Put that gun down right now, don't start messing with Niragi."

"Y/N, it's okay," he assured you and turned back to Arisu and Niragi. "We can settle things once and for all."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Arisu shouted.

"Come on, where's your gun? I know you got one," Niragi said to Arisu.

"There's gotta be another way to do this," Arisu insisted.

Niragi was tired of waiting and shot towards Arisu, but missed. Right that second Chishiya pushed you behind the car so you'd stay out of the way and not get put between the shooting.

Niragi was soon standing on top of one of the cars, doing some sort of dramatic speech. God, how much you wanted to throw your knife through his eye right now. But you didn't.

After a while, Usagi arrived to the scene, silencing everyone. Everything happened faster than you managed to comprehend the situation.

Another gunshot was fired, making Chishiya fall on the ground on his back, having taken a second bullet into his body now. Niragi had meant to shoot Usagi, but Chishiya had decided to step in and sacrifice himself or whatever the hell he was thinking of doing. In return, Arisu shot Niragi.

"Chishiya!" you and Usagi shouted in unison.

"Why did you do that?" Usagi cried.

"I wanted to do something that was a bit out of character," Chishiya stated, trying to smile a little bit.

You, Usagi and Arisu surrounded Chishiya, all of you worried about him.

"No, no, no," you whimpered, more to yourself than to Chishiya. "This can't be happening right now."

"Y/N, calm down," Chishiya said, looking directly into your eyes. "I'll be alright."

If Chishiya died from bleeding out right now, you'd actually go and kill Niragi with your own hands.

"Oh, and by the way, Niragi!" Chishiya shouted with a smug grin on his face now. "You're going to become an uncle."

Niragi looked at him for a moment with a puzzled expression on his face, glancing shortly towards you, until his face darkened. Your eyes widened as well, not expecting Chishiya to drop the bomb like that.

"You knocked up my sister?!" he shouted, trying to get up but he was too wounded from the wound Arisu caused at him. The tone of his voice was so angry and harsh that he would have definitely attacked Chishiya with his bare hands if he was able to.

"Wasn't my original intention," Chishiya shouted back. Normally he would have been terrified to shout anything like that to Niragi, but he had already shot Chishiya twice anyway, so what did it matter anymore?

"So, what? You're a couple now?" Niragi scoffed. "Going to build a nice little family in the suburbs or something?"

You rolled your eyes and was about to say something back, when you heard more shooting coming from the distance. This time, it wasn't Niragi.

The King of Spades arrived, dressed in a long black cloak, shooting every person in his sight.

Everything became a huge chaos. People were running away from him left and right. You spotted Ann and Kuina running towards you.

Soon, someone drove over him with a car, setting the car in flames. People started to cheer that you had won, the King was finally defeated – but they were wrong, very wrong. Because the King rose from the flames like a phoenix, throwing his cloak away and finally revealed his face.

It was only a man. One man who nobody seemed to defeat. He had a long scar across his cheek and the look in his eyes was colder than death itself. There was no emotion in his gaze, only the crave for more death until every single person in this country was gone except him. He was dressed in some sort of bulletproof vest, so it would be useless to shoot to his chest.

Both Chishiya and Niragi were bleeding out on the ground. You kneeled down in front of Chishiya with wide eyes when the King had gone our of sight for a moment. His white hoodie was being dyed in red on his stomach which he was holding with his hand.

"Chishiya, i-"

"It's okay, Y/N," he assured you and smiled. "He didn't hit any vital organs."

"Are you sure about it?" you asked, more worried than ever before, and cupped his face in your hands. "I can't let you die here just like this. Tell me what i can do, please."

You tried to put your hand against his wound, but he put his hand gently around your wrist.

"Hey, you were shot twice and survived, i can do the same." Chishiya smirked. "By the same man too."

You looked at him in the eyes, finding nothing funny or even slightly amusing about the situation.

"I'll go and help our friends, okay?" you said and brushed his face with your thumb. "Promise to live for me."

"I promise," he nodded.

You looked into his eyes for a little longer, genuinely afraid for his life.

"I'll be back soon."

You took his face in your hands and kissed him, keeping your lips on his longer than before. You didn't want to let go, you wanted to stay like this for much longer but you knew you couldn't.

Then, you walked away from him, on your way to help your friends to beat the King. You were unharmed, for now, so you couldn't just stand or sit around doing nothing while others were fighting back.

But Chishiya wanted you to stay. He didn't want you to go after the King, because there was a high chance that you wouldn't return to him unharmed anymore. But he knew you wouldn't let your friends be alone in the fight.

"So," Niragi started awkwardly when you had been out of sight for a minute or two. "Didn't leave banging her for one time only?"

"We had a few rounds."

Niragi laughed. "You're definitely not his usual type."

"Yeah? What's her usual type then?" Chishiya asked, slightly curious.

"You know, toxic assholes," he shrugged. "Not sure if you're any better than that though, but they were atleast taller and more... masculine looking."

Chishiya didn't respond to that. He already knew you were too good for him. How could he deserve someone like you? You two weren't in an exclusive relationship together, there had been no conversation of you two being a couple – would you move on from him when you'd get back home? Back to your own friends in your real life?

You had talked about what was to come between you, just a little bit, but it was a different thing to talk about it and have it actually happen.

When you would escape this world, you wouldn't need Chishiya to protect and take care of you anymore. What if he had been only a short comfort to you, being able to feel safe during these games, trying to avoid death at all cost?

He didn't know what he wanted from you, truly wanted, but he didn't want you to leave him alone, no matter what kind of part you would play in his life. Lover, partner, friend – he'd take anything, as long as you were there.

"If you break her heart, i'll actually kill you," Niragi threatened. "Like, i won't hesitate at all."

"Oh, i don't doubt that at all," Chishiya admitted with an amused smile, which started to fade sooner than it got there. "And i would never do that intentionally."

"Do you love her?" Niragi asked, narrowing his eyes.

Chishiya was silent for a moment and looked into his hands, furrowing his brows.

"I do care about her. A lot," he admitted.

Had he gone as far as fallen in love? He didn't know. He hadn't loved a woman before, like truly loved with all his heart, so he wasn't sure what it felt like. Was it love? Surely not.

Niragi eyed him for a moment. It was awkward to talk about his feelings with Niragi. It felt surreal for having a conversation like this alone with him and not have him pointing a gun at Chishiya's face.

"Hm," was all Niragi mumbled. Chishiya couldn't tell what he was thinking by the look of his face, and he preferred to keep it that way.

♤♡♧◇

The plan was to lure the King towards the pharmacy and cause an explosion there. Aguni had joined in as well – of course you should have known he wouldn't die that easily.

Your heart was beating faster than ever before, you were completely terrified but you had to be brave to save yourself and your friends – to finally end these games and get back home.

You stayed in the shadows, walking slowly from corner to corner until it would be your turn to make your move on the King.

You had a gun in your hand as well, shooting towards the King but you missed. Eventually, you ran out of bullets, you hadn't had a lot to begin with. You quickly pulled one of your knives from your boot and threw it towards him, managing to pierce his shoulder instead of neck which you had originally aimed for, intending to break an artery. The damage of your knife on him was pathetic. He calmly took the knife off, threw it on the ground and looked like the wound didn't even sting at all, even though the blade was covered in blood.

When he was facing you, you tried to jump behind a corner to hide yourself for a second, but before that the King managed to shoot you as well, three times on your abdomen. You had the urge to fall on the ground but you managed to stay up. The King turned away from you, and now you gathered your last strength and threw your second, and the last, knife towards his neck – now managing to hit the side of his neck.

The King was about to shoot you again to end your life for good, but right then Aguni jumped in to attack him, making the King forget you momenturaly. You took this as a chance to escape and tried to get out of there as fast as possible. You had no weapons or energy to fight with anymore.

You weren't able to move very fast and soon collapsed on the ground, holding your bleeding stomach.

When Chishiya saw you crawling towards him, his eyes widened and panic took over him. He shouldn't have let you go to the fight. Of course you wouldn't survive the King – none of you would.

"Y/N," Chishiya breathed out. "Y/N!"

Chishiya wouldn't be able to carry you, not this time. He couldn't go and pick you up, he couldn't even get up himself.

You couldn't crawl any further, you didn't manage to reach Chishiya like you had planned. You stopped next to one of the cars, but it wasn't the one which Chishiya had been leaning on.

Chishiya saw blood on your shirt and hands, terror taking over his body. He stood up, slowly, legs feeling unsteady under him but he had to get to you. Chishiya held his stomach as he took slow and tired steps to you.

Chishiya sat next to you, heart beating fast. He was barely able to breathe when he lifted the hem of your shirt and saw your bare stomach. Three gunshots on your abdomen.

"I'm so tired, Shiya," you mumbled.

"It'll be alright," Chishiya assured you, but he didn't come off as convincing at all, how his voice was shaking and trembling. He took off his hoodie, trying to wrap it around your waist. Anything to slow the bleeding, but he knew it wouldn't help enough. Still, it must be better than nothing. Chishiya pressed on your stomach, making you wince.

"Ow, that hurts," you mumbled, making Chishiya to try to be more gentle.

You laid down on your back, your head now on Chishiya's lap.

"I don't feel so good," you mumbled, your eyelids feeling heavy.

"You're not closing your eyes right now," Chishiya commanded. "You'll stay with me, okay? It won't be long anymore."

You looked in Chishiya's eyes and gave him a small, a bit sad smile. There was going to be no medical treatment for you any time soon, you were bleeding out and it wouldn't take too long anymore to start to be on the edge of dying.

"Thank you Chishiya," you whispered. "The weeks i've spent with you have been wonderful and i'm so glad i met you."

Chishiya's eyes started to water. He didn't know the last time he had cried. Had he ever cried? He didn't remember. But losing you, having you die right in his arms, was absolutely breaking him.

"Y/N, don't talk to me like this is going to be our last moment together," Chishiya said, almost a threatening tone in his voice.

Chishiya pulled you up so he could hold you in his arms, you sitting between his legs and your head resting against his shoulder. He had his arm around your back and waist, holding you like a mom would hold her baby.

"Shiya, i'm bleeding out," you whispered, a tear rolling down your cheek. "There's nothing you can do anymore."

"No, Y/N, we've come this far, you're not giving up on me when we're almost finished with the games and on our way home," Chishiya said and cupped your face, making you turn your face towards him. "We'll be okay. We'll get back home and we can finally spend time with each other without being afraid of death all the time. We'll do anything you want. I'll take you out, a real date just the two of us. I'll- I'll cook food for you. I'll make us sushi. I'll buy you flowers, if you want. I'll even take you dancing. I'll -"

He was talking so fast you had a hard time to interrupt him. "Chishiya," you mumbled and lifted your hand to cup his cheek, not realising your hand was covered in your own blood and you were leaving a print of blood on his skin. "Shut up."

"You can't leave me alone," Chishiya whispered. "You can't."

Not when i just got you. We've barely even started getting know each other.

"It's okay," you whispered.

"No, it's not," Chishiya gritted between his teeth.

"Shiya," you whispered, furrowing your brows and wiped a tear off his cheek. "Are you crying?"

Chishiya hadn't realised he had let couple of tears run down his cheeks.

"No," he mumbled. He never cried, he wouldn't cry now either, but still the tears were forcing themselves out of his eyes.

"Don't cry. I don't want to see you cry."

Eventually, the fireworks started, covering the entire dark sky all over the city. You looked above you to the fireworks, a smile on your face.

"It's nice to die during fireworks. I've always liked them," you said quietly.

"No. No, stop. Don't talk like that," Chishiya said seriously. "We'll get through this. We'll get back home."

Then, a loud announcement was repeated to you twice.

All surviving players will be presented by two choices.

Players can now all decide whether to accept permanent residency in this country or decline it.

"I want to go home," you said, a tear falling down your cheek. "I decline. Please, take me home."

"I'll take you home, i promise," Chishiya insisted and planted a kiss on the top of your head. "We'll both go home."

"I just want you to know that," you started. "I know we haven't known each other very long, but if there was a person meant for me, i think it would be you."

Chishiya wanted to tell you how much you meant to him. How much he had started to care about you, but the words were stuck in his throat.

"Y/N, i-"

But your eyes had already closed. Your body was limp against his.

"No. No, wake up," Chishiya mumbled under his breath, his eyes wide, then raising his voice. "I said wake up!"

He was shaking your body to get you to open your eyes, as if you were taking just a short nap. But you weren't asleep, he wouldn't be able to shake you awake anymore.

"Wake up," he whispered in disbelief, barely able to hear the words himself.

Chishiya held your head, trying to find your pulse on your neck but his hands were shaking so much he had hard times to find it. And he felt nothing. He had taken care of your injuries, able to patch you up, but now? He could do nothing. He felt absolutely useless.

The games were over. All of them. You had survived so many games but passed away right in the last second. Right when you would have only a few steps left to get back home. The door was right in front of you.

I love you. He never managed to say those simple words to you. He didn't even fully realise it until you were already gone. I love you.

"I love you," Chishiya mumbled against your forehead.

Chishiya held you close against his chest until the fireworks stopped.

♤♡♧◇

A/N: Before you yell at me — this isn't the last part.

Taglist:

@audiiix

@valexqpt

@moonchild323232

@lizxoxeth

@crazzzyyyy

@spencersoneball

@queenofviolenceandnerds

#chishiya imagine #chishiya alice in borderland #aib chishiya #chishiya shuntaro #alice in borderland x reader #aib imagine #alice in borderland #alice in borderland imagine #chishiya x reader

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queerprayers · 2 days ago

Note

i've grown up in quite a secular family, never went to church etc, and only in the past couple of years started celebrating serbian orthodox christmas with my mum where we attend part of the christmas eve mass. i want to get to know christianity a little better, and i know ur lutheran and not orthodox but i was wondering if u have any tips for just. starting somewehere? it feels very strange to sit down and think "Im Going To Pray" when ive neither done it nor seen anyone do it before, but i want to explore a bit, if that makes sense. your blog is very nice and calming i feel like you might have some insight :)

Welcome, beloved!

Prayer is quite strange sometimes and Sitting Down and Doing It does not come easily to most, especially if you didn't grow up doing that. I'm honored to be asked and I have a few thoughts.

At some point as a kid I was taught the acronym ACTS—Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving, Supplication. I was told a prayer should contain these elements. And I don't technically disagree; I think those are all good necessary things. If you want a formula, there's a formula. But I always found "I pray because I can't help myself. I pray because I'm helpless. I pray because the need flows out of me all the time- waking and sleeping" a much more real description of prayer.

We're told to pray always, without ceasing—prayer is something to bring with us. It is to be in relation with the God who is Love, who knows our suffering, and who hears. To pray is to be heard—and to listen in return, even if what we receive may be holy silence.

Mass is a prayer, one the Church does together. Liturgy is where I learned most of the prayers I say, where I first chanted the psalms. I learned to read in church. Even once a year, it shows us many parts of prayer—it fulfills the acronym, sure, but attending services has shown me that prayer can be somber, joyful, certain, wondering, penitent, musical, silent. We can also think of things prayer can be that we don't want to replicate—Jesus talks about hypocritical ways of praying, of calling attention to oneself, of "heaping up empty phrases."

It doesn't always look like Sitting Down. There are not always words. I sit down (or lie down, depending) and pray at certain times—this was a hard-won habit, that still doesn't come easy—but it's easier for me to use my own words in the woods.. You can be anywhere, and be doing anything. You don't have to commit to a form—do it a little bit differently each time. Ask a question. Confess something. Picture someone you love in your mind, and feel that love. Look at each person on the subway and wish something for them. Set a timer on your phone to spend five minutes tentatively thinking about God—this is a prayer that can be more deeply felt than all the books in the world.

Whatever strangeness or embarrassment there is in addressing an unseen being, in coming to the Universe with your one quiet voice, it is the strange embarrassment of caring, of attempting what seems impossible, of being earnest about this whole being alive thing. The uncertainty of a new relationship, the doubt of whether it all matters, the unfamiliarity of learning a new skill. But you can do strange things, new things, vulnerable things. Love is continuing movement, and each step takes more bravery. You need communication with Love to live in it.

Of course there are countless people who do not purposefully pray and yet show more love than I could ever hope to. God has met many, and sustained many, without their ever asking, sometimes without them ever knowing his name. But the asking is another kind of love, and I am one of the many who devote myself to even slight knowledge of his face. You have all you need to join me—because you have God.

The need that flows out of you, all the time—the draw you feel to start—is a prayer already. Really, there is no start—only a joining of a current already in motion. A dipping into a well that never runs dry. Others have the words, if you don't. I learn the psalms because, for all my poetry, I can't say it all, and never as perfectly as they do—and because it's a connection with centuries of voices. The practicing of the divine hours is another connection.

But really, putting aside the walks in the woods and the going to church more and the acronyms and the metaphors—how do you pray on purpose? Ultimately, there is no better answer than the one Jesus gave: Go into your room, shut the door, and (without an earthly audience, without looking a certain way or believing a certain thing) pray to the secret, listening God, in whatever language/version you have,

Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, forever and ever, Amen.

You've never done it or seen it before, sure, but it's built into you, to need this. Once you've done it, you will have seen it. Once you've seen it, I expect you'll realize you have done it before, without noticing. You don't have the words, so they have been given to you. You don't have to believe wholeheartedly each word—that comes later for those of us who grow up in it, and it can come later for you, too. Start in the somewhere you have been placed.

The first thing we learn how to ask for as babies is the result of every prayer: being heard. So cry out.

<3 Johanna

#asks #i'm not formulating a god/breastfeeding metaphor at the end there but know one exists #anyway good luck i'm on your side! you make me happy!

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rainbowboy33 · 14 hours ago

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I heard someone knocking at the door of my house... When I opened the door, I saw a beautiful hunk with a gorgeous smile on his face...

"Hi Dad...", he said...

He saw my surprised look because I didn't recognised him...

"You can't remember me, don't you... I am your son... You had a date with my mother Sandra... 20 years ago... And you have put me inside of her cunt... And here I am..."

"Sandra... Sandra... Oh wait... Sandra... Yeah... That girl who treated me with another guy while I thought that she wanted to share her life with me... I never knew that I had knocked her up... But I see that I did a very good job..."

"Thank you Dad..."

"But, tell me... How did you know that I am your Dad? And how did you find me?"

"Well, mom told me that she found out that you are gay. That's the reason why she left you for that other guy... My step dad... He was not happy when I told mom and dad... ehh step dad that I am gay too... They told me that it would be better when I should go to a college in another part of the country... They also told me that it would be better when I would not come back to them as soon as I had started a study somewhere else in the country... And so... I am going to live and study here in this city. I found a small room that I rent now, and last night, I went to a gaybar for a nice drink. And I had a chat with a guy who told me that he knows you and he could give me your address... Because I told him that I would love to find you, hoping to see you... And finally, I did find you... That was a very big wish that I had since years... I hope that you are not angry that I want to get to know you..."

"Ohhh... Ofcourse not, my... Son... But... Come inside and let me be the Dad you want me to be... Wwwooowww... I have a SON... You don't know how happy and excited I am to know that I have a son... What is your name, by the way...?"

"Oh... Yeah... Ofcourse... I am Randy..."

"Wwwooowww... Knowing that I have a son makes me... How do I say that... Happy... Excited... And PROUD... And knowing that my son is gay too... That is really special too... My son, who is gay and really good looking..." But I am sorry to hear that you are not welcome to see your mother and her husband anymore..."

"Thank you Dad... But I don't feeling sad that they don't want to see me anymore. Because I don't like to know people who don't want to accept me the way I am. They are not worth to get the love that I love to give to people who are happy with the way I am..."

"Well son... Then it is even better that you have found me..."

"That's the same as what I am thinking, Dad... And knowing that my Dad is gay, and a beautiful and very good looking man too makes ME proud too... Knowing you is making me much more happy then losing the parents who doesn't want to see me anymore...

"Now I know that I have a beautiful son, I would love it when you are okay with me to come over to live here with me... Then you don't need that room anymore that you are renting now... Together as father and son under the same roof... That is a much better decision... I have a room which is empty... There is only a table and a chair in that room... We can make it your room if you like... Then you have a place where you can study... I know that it is a very small room, but it's better than nothing..."

"That sounds great, Dad..."

"I was just thinking, I have a nice king size bed in my bedroom. You can also share that bed with me ofcourse... Then that small room will be your study room, and also a place for you when you wanna be alone in a private moment..."

"Wwwooowww Dad... That sounds even better... I think that it will be very exciting to sleep in the same room and the same bed as my new found Dad, who will be my hero from now on..."

"Oh boy... Randy... You're making me blush..."

A couple of hours later, we went to that room that he is renting to pick up his belongings. We decorated that small room as his study room, and we put his clothes in a walking closet in that same room.

"Okay son... I think that it is time to make some food... What would you like to eat?"

"Maybe we can order pizza..."

"That sounds good son..."

Later that night I told Randy that I was going to take a hot shower. While I was enjoying the hot water, Randy came into the shower room as he wanted to share a nice and hot shower with me... While he was getting out of his clothes, I couldn't keep my eyes off of him... Wwwooowww... What a beautiful guy with a beautiful body... A big strong muscled chest with gorgeous nippels... I was getting excited with this gorgeous guy who was sharing this hot shower with me...

I wrapped my arms around his muscled body and hold him in my arms... Feeling the strong and hard muscles in his body made a muscle between my legs rockhard...

"Ohhh Dad... I am so happy that I have found you... And I am even more happy that you want me to live here with you in your house..."

"I am very happy too son, and also that you've accepted my invitation to come over to live here with me..."

"I can feel that you are happy, Dad"

And after saying this, I felt his hand around my rockhard boner... My own studson was playing with my rockhard boner... And as if I was in a trance, I started to fuck his hand...

At once, he turned around and pressed his lips at my lips and pushed his tongue deep inside of my mouth for a good and exciting French kiss... And boy... He knew how to kiss... Then he took his tongue out of my mouth and looked me straight into my eyes... And I looked deep inside of his beautiful eyes and was proud and happy again to have him here with me...

Then he went on his knees and wrapped his lips around the head of my big uncut fuckmeat... And as a prof, he started to suck as if he was a dick addicted... It felt as if I had won the lottery... He knew how to suck dick... And I knew what he wanted... My creamy daddyspunk deep inside of his stomach... Faster and faster he bobbed his hot lips over my incestdick... Yeah... That is what my dick was from now on... A big fat uncut incestdick that was sliding in and out of the throat of this horny twinks who came as a wonderful surprise into my life as my own son... He started to suck me faster and faster as if he could feel that my daddyspunk was boiling deep inside of my ball sac... And then I was ready to give him what he wanted... I took his head in my hands, pushed myself ballsdeep inside of his throat, and dumped my spunkloads deep inside of his stomach...

"Wwwooowww... That was fantastic son... You gave me the best blowjob I had in years..."

He stood up and pressed his lips at my lips again for another deep French kiss... While his tongue was dancing with my tongue, I could taste my own spunk that I just dumped inside of his mouth...

Then he turned me around, went down on his knees again, took my bums in his hands and pressed his tongue against my cunt muscle... He let me feel this was not his first mancunt that he started to eat... The feeling of his tongue, which was going deep inside of my daddycunt, made me groan as a horny slut... Yeah... That is what I wanted to be for him from now on... A Daddy incestslut for my hot horny studson... Then he stood up, placed the head of his 10 inch uncut fuckmeat against the entrance of my fuckhole, and plugged himself with one push deep inside of me... Wwwooowww... He really stretched my daddycunt to the maximum and started to fuck me hard and raw as a brutal fuckdevil... I could feel how his spunkgun squeezed my prostate with each thrust... And automatically, I pushed myself backwards against him to get him as much as possible inside of my fucktunnel... A felt myself as a horny spunkslut who was riding the hottest and horniest twinkdick that I could get... And then... It felt as if his monster started to grow bigger and harder inside of me...

"Ohhh Dad... Your cunt... So exciting to fuck.. I can't hold it anymore... FUUUUCK..."

And with one last thrust, my son started to dump his spunkloads deep inside of me... It was as if he saved gallons and gallons of creamy spunkloads for this exciting moment... Wwwooowww... When this is the start of my life together with him, then my life with him is gonna be a life in Heaven...

"Wwwooowww Dad... This was really awesome... I never thought that I could get the possibility to fuck my own Dad... I never thought that I could dump my spunkloads deep inside of the guy who is my own wonderful Dad... I hope and pray that this will not be the last time that we had a hot fucksession with each other..."

" Be sure, my sweet Randy, that I am even more happy to know that you are going to share your life, my king size bed and my sex addiction with me... Fuck your mother and her husband... From now on you belongs to me, your Dad who is really happy that you went to search for me..."

"Fuck my mother and her husband? Yakkk... What a discusting idea... There is only one person for me I wanna fuck... As much as possible... And that person is you Dad... Only you... I love you, Dad... I really do..."

"I love you too son... For the rest of our life... And now... Let's go to our bedroom for another fuckparty... This time I wanna taste YOUR creamy spunkloads..."

This all happened about six months ago, and we both are still happy to share our life with each other... We love to fuck and suck whenever we can... And we both know one thing for sure... Incest between Dad and his son is the best we can get... 🍆👌👉💦💦💦💦😛

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