#i don’t consider myself a feminist but i feel like

[pro-birth]

Simone De Beauvoir should be to feminists what Sigmund Freud is to psychologists: important to read from and learn about for the context of the modern field but fiercely detested for their sexist BS infiltrating our society.

[vexingwoman]

genuine question regarding the "women are female people" post. trying to understand the radfem mindset because I don't agree with y'all on most things, but I understand your need to find safety and acceptance within the patriarchy's oppression/danger. I am female but not a woman. I was never socialized as one either. I feel like biological socialization piece goes out the window in my case. Biologically yes, I am female, but socially no one, including myself, would ever view me as a woman or place me through the same social oppression that women face, nor will I experience or have experienced any of the good parts of womanhood. I feel no desire to, because despite sharing the same biology, we are not socially the same. I feel like, in this experience, theres a stark divide between the social category of "women" and biological category of "female." What is your take on this, I'm curious?

The crucial issue here is that you’re conflating women and femininity. You say there’s a difference between women and females, when you instead mean there’s a difference between feminine women and non-feminine women. You believe women are socially constructed, when you instead mean femininity is socially constructed.

The only way you could think that your non-conformance to femininity indicated that you were not a woman, is if you believed femininity was innate and inseparable from women. This is not only an unabashed display of bioessentialism, but a reinforcement of the same sex-based roles and sexist stereotypes that gender ideologues purport to be defying. 

In case you don’t know, the concepts of femininity and masculinity were created solely to enforce female subjugation and male domination (elaboration here). Therefore, nothing is more misogynistic or in direct contradiction to the radical feminist goal of gender abolition than claiming women are defined by the very social construct created to subjugate them, rather than by their biological sex.  

I’ll be honest, I feel increasingly irritated and hopeless every time I receive these messages of “I���m not a woman because I don’t conform to society’s sexist, outdated idea of what women are.” How can you not see how backwards it is to believe your conformity to a demographic’s harmful stereotypes is what determines whether you belong to that demographic? In what other circumstances is this ever the case?

This is a genuine question: why is it so hard for you to acknowledge that you’re a gender-non-conforming woman? Why must you go through all these mental cartwheels and act as though being a woman is contingent on how others view you, or how you socially conduct yourself, or what degree of oppression you face? What benefit do you see in defining women by the social construct of femininity (hierarchical, prescriptive, arbitrary) rather than defining them as female (non-hierarchical, descriptive, concrete)? 

Much of my frustration stems from the knowledge that radical feminists and gender ideologues actually hold similar views on the concepts of women and men, until they diverge at one crucial, irreconcilable point: 

Both radical feminists and gender ideologues acknowledge the existence of regressive stereotypes attributed to the sexes. But where radical feminists seek to remove the stereotypes from the sex, gender ideologues instead, quite stupidly, seek to remove the sex from the stereotypes.

In short, I still consider you a woman completely deserving of access to women’s spaces, because being a woman does not, and should not, have any other prerequisites other than being an adult, a human, and a female. There are not, and should not be, any behaviors, aesthetics, feelings, or non-biological characteristics that determine whether you’re a woman. There are no gendered brains; there are no gendered souls. Being a woman is an innate, neutral, and non-prescriptive reality, no different than having freckles or brown eyes or hooked noses.

[ramblings-of-a-detrans-woman]

Why I will never support the radical feminist movement, as a detransitioning woman.

note: this is not meant to be any sort of hit piece or slander, I respect every feminist, even ones I disagree with. This is just my reasoning for why I do not like the radfem movement.

For a bit of context, I’ve indentified as trans since I was 12. At 18, I’ve decided to live my life as a lesbian woman, and i’ve never been happier with that choice.

Now, being a young trans man, I interacted a lot with pro trans content online (of course I did), and so of course I’ve heard about radical feminism. A passionate branch of feminism that takes a unique approach to women’s rights- deconstructing gender entirely. It sounds wonderful in theory, because of course gender is oppressive, most notably of women. I would know, being one. Even when I was trans I had to worry about being out at night. I even got chased once, and a man attempted to lure me to his truck another time. It’s brutal. But radical feminists devote their activism to ending this in a straightforward, logical way.

So why do I, a woman who has experienced both misogyny and transphobia, not support that? I feel that this is a good question for both trans allies and radfems alike to to ask. Knowledge is power.

Well, I’ll be direct. Radfems are some of the most depraved people i’ve ever met. I know, that sounds like a lot, but there’s no other words I can use that don’t perfectly encapsulate my experience with radfems. It’s depravity.

For weeks, I was harassed by transphobic radfems. Radfems, who are insistent on their love and support for TIFs aka trans men. It’s strange then that they would be so cruel towards one, wouldn’t you say?

Detransition is hard enough. It’s difficult to tell family that you were wrong. It’s difficult to reconnect with my gender. Hell, i prefer the term detrans over cis just because i have such a disconnect from my gender. So why do I have to deal with transphobic radfems sending me gore and death threats?

Thankfully all of the accounts doing this seem to be deleted or repurposed. But it’s only a matter of time until a new account is made just to send me an ask telling me to kill myself or a message about how much of a loser i am.

It’s this reason alone why i’ll never be a radfem. They’re just sick people. They don’t want liberation for women, they just hate trans people. It’s not even thinly veiled, their accounts are fully based around how horrible trans women are.

The truth being, trans women aren’t bad people at all. It’s easy to think they are because the news and media cherry picks some of the worst ones, but every community and minority group has bad people in it. some of the sickest people you could imagine, really. yes, they can be trans. but does being trans make you a sick person? does it turn you into a predator? no, it doesn’t. it just means you’re trans. trans or not, it’s up to men to be mature and take accountability for their own actions that they consciously make. a cis man is as capable to walk into a women’s room as a trans woman is.

if radical feminists cared more about women and detrans women, i could consider getting along with them. but sadly, all these passionate and dedicated feminists care about is hating trans people with a fiery passion. and i’ve been a casualty. it’s very difficult for me to sympathize with radfems when they’ve upset me to the point that they have

let me make it clear that gore and death threats don’t upset me, i’m not easily offended. So it’s not the threats that make me angry. It’s just the principle. The fact that radfems are spending their time scrolling reddit for gore pictures to send to fellow women instead of supporting us makes me SICK. it’s heartbreaking to picture a woman, raped and beaten by her boyfriend, and a radfem standing in front of her, readily available to help, but choosing to yell at a passing detrans woman. It’s really sad.

hopefully those reading this can take my words into consideration and use it to improve yourselves or your community (if you’re a radfem). i love womanhood and being a woman and i would love to share that joy with my sisters, but i just can’t when these issues i’ve experienced are in the back of my mind. I want radical feminism to be a safe space, a place where sisters can go to talk to women, relate to women, cry with and support women. but so far, the only love and support i’ve received has been from the trans community. that speaks volumes.

i am going to post more about my experience with finding my womanhood again in the future, so if you’re a detrans woman yourself, trans ally or not, consider following me :) i’d love to build myself a little community

[transgenderteensurvivalguide]

up until recently i ran a pretty popular radfem blog (stay with me, this ask is in good faith) but after i took a social media detox, i realized i don’t share those beliefs anymore and in fact i might be trans myself. i just kind of abandoned the blog, but i’d feel bad if i didn’t tell my followers what happened. i’m scared of telling anyone because i feel like i’d be a bad feminist if i transitioned. (i know, you can be trans and a feminist just fine, but that’s just the kind of thing radfems tell you.) even worse, i’m scared of posting about it on my main or radfem blog because radfems and trans people by and large hate each other (obv), and i’m scared to mention i’ve been in both groups because of the hate i’ll get

Lee says:

When I first started as a mod, I would have told you that you need to immediately post on all your blogs to disown the transphobic beliefs you had previously expressed to try to make up for the harm that you may have perpetrated as a radfem.

Now that I'm a little older, my feelings on the topic have shifted a bit. Before anything else, I think you need to slow down and make sure that you ensure your own safety and mental health.

If you believe that revealing this change to your followers could result in backlash online that would affect you emotionally, it's crucial to prepare by turning off anonymous asks and muting notifications from social media apps.

You should also make sure you have a non-online place to turn for support. If they used to be your community, you may feel like you've lost online friends, so make sure you don't become too isolated. Instead, lean on your IRL connections and seek support from trans-friendly people in your community.

You may even want to consider looking for a therapist-- questioning being trans can be difficult for anyone, and adding a layer of internalized transphobia doesn't help.

When you're ready to share your feelings on your blog, you should write a thoughtful post explaining your journey. You don't have to justify your identity; rather, focus on your personal growth, how your views have evolved, and how you came to understand yourself better. Acknowledge the complexity of the situation and that you're still learning.

These people were once your buddies and there's a chance you may be able to make some of them question their beliefs too if you don't lash out at them and trigger that instinctual defensive us-versus-them mindset, so I would try to keep a friendly tone even while noting that you no longer support them.

So thank your followers for their support and engagement over the years, but tell them you aren't comfortable staying part of their community now that you've realized that the beliefs underpinning the group are doing damage and you are trying to unlearn that type of thinking.

Gently challenge any misconceptions you once held or promoted. Clarify that being trans and feminist are not mutually exclusive and that everyone deserves respect and equality, regardless of their gender identity.

If you're comfortable, share resources that helped you on your journey. This could be educational materials, support groups, books you found helpful, or contact information for trans-supportive LGBTQ+ organizations. If there's anything you'd recommend to others who were once in the same place as you were on getting out, this is the time to share your advice.

Understand that reactions will likely be mixed. Some followers may feel confused, betrayed, or angry, while others might be supportive or even share their similar experiences. Remember, you're not responsible for their reactions and you don't need to respond to them if you don't want to argue and they aren't willing to have a respectful conversation.

Be clear about your boundaries. Let your followers know what kind of comments you're willing to engage with and that hate or harassment won't be tolerated. You can even stop engaging with the account altogether if you don't think you can deal with the hate that you may receive.

You don't have to post about this immediately. Again, it's okay to take as much time as you need to feel ready. It's okay to wait until you're in a safe and stable position before making any announcements.

If you do post about it and get hate, remind yourself that you're doing the right thing by letting go of that community, and that you're not only making the right choice for your own life in allowing yourself the freedom to explore your gender identity but you're also doing the right thing overall since you're now standing up for the trans community (late is better than never!) and no longer encouraging transphobic narratives.

If you feel that your current blog is no longer a space where you can express yourself authentically, consider starting a new blog or platform where you can write freely about your experiences and beliefs. Or just get offline altogether-- your digital detox is what started this, so maybe it's healthy for you to continue it for a while!

If you tell someone "I support trans folks" and they send you hate, that person is not your friend anyway. This is an opportunity to meet nice people who you can be yourself with. I would really encourage you to connect with IRL activists who are actually regularly volunteering and doing something concrete for their community if you have the opportunity.

When I was in high school, I volunteered at my local library's teen advisory board, and when I was in college I volunteered at a local hospital and through my college. This weekend I'm starting training for volunteering in-person for my town's emergency preparedness group which also does things like help to unload trucks for the food pantry, and I also volunteer remotely for two organizations online.

I'm really pushing for you to get out and volunteer (online or IRL) because I know one draw of the radfem community is feeling like you're an activist and that you're supporting women's rights and protecting and defending women. And it is important to support women's rights and protect and defend women! But there are other ways to do that beyond running a hateful blog attacking trans women.

I have a friend who works at an organization for survivors of domestic violence, for example, and she works with volunteers who help staff events, answer the hotline, etc. You can look around and see what local initiatives there are in your community and if you can't find the thing you're looking for you can start a group yourself or look online and join a national or state-wide cause that you care about, like pushing the legislature to support access to abortions.

Giving up the radfem community doesn't mean giving up feminism, and this is a good opportunity for you to take a look at your own time, your values, and think about how you can take this chance to start working to be a more effective feminist. Not everyone has to be an activist, but if you want to be one, think about how you can start doing good in a way that will actually affect people in a positive way.

I've also often been involved in doing events like conferences and workshops and panels IRL from my time in high school to the present day to try and educate folks on the community, but I also know that sometimes you need to take a step back and prioritize yourself. If you think you're not ready to jump into making change that's also okay. Just join something. A soccer team, a book club, anything hobby-related, to have something else to do and talk about and think about and stay tethered to feeling part of something.

Remember, it's okay to grow and change. You're not betraying anyone by being true to yourself. It's a courageous step to admit when your views have changed, and it's an integral part of personal growth. Be kind to yourself during this process.

Whether or not you end up identify as trans, you still will be doing the right thing by separating yourself from that community. I know it may be difficult because they were a place where you felt supported and part of a movement, but I really believe that you're taking steps in the right direction by letting go of that ideology and just living your life!

Followers, if you have any experiences unlearning toxic beliefs please reply with your advice for anon!

[queer-teens]

🌈Queer Teens

Who are we?

We are Queer Teens, an organization which seeks to create a friendly and inclusive space for queer and feminist youths to express their ideas. We are primarily based in Shanghai, China and organized by a group of high-schoolers. However, even though we are a LGBTQ+ Youth organization, we strongly encourage diversity in age and nationality (which is why we also got on Tumblr!), so please join us if you want to!

What do we do?

1. 1v1 counseling for queer teens

If you are ever in distress about your identity or lack of understanding from people around you, feel free to just send us a message and we will try to communicate with you! Our email is queerteens.cn@gmail.com. Be aware that none of us have undergone training and offer this help from an unprofessional perspective. Seek professional help if necessary. 

2. Recommend queer theory and feminism books

Members of our organization are reading as many books as we can to recommend some books we like! We will recommend books about queer theory or feminism in the future!

3. Express our own ideas!

We may regularly or irregularly post blogs about our discussions and conclusions! Feel free to comment below and start new discussions! We may also organize online conferences in the future, but that’s not decided for now. 

4. Be the bridge between Chinese queer teens and Tumblr queer teens

As we all know, the existence of the Great Firewall of China prevents Chinese queer teens from going on Tumblr and many other more inclusive online spaces. In addition, China itself is not particularly welcoming towards queer people in general, not to mention queer teens. Thus, we will bridge the gap by sharing stories and connecting pen friends (through e-mail). More details of this activity will be mentioned later!

Why Queer Teens?

According to a study conducted by Johns et al. 2019&2020, LGBTQ+ youth are more than 4 times more likely to commit suicide than their peers. The Trevor Project even estimated that at least 1 LGBTQ+ youth every 45 seconds in the U.S. alone. Teen mental health is a serious issue we should consider, not to mention the increased risk LGBTQ+ youth endure due to bullying, discrimination and lack of understanding due to their queer identity. 

I myself, one of the admins of this blog who now writes the paragraph, am a high-school non-binary lesbian currently living in China. I have found using Tumblr liberating from my rather conservative environment. China is not very accommodating towards lesbians, and it’s even worse for people questioning of their gender. When I had gone to the school counselor(luckily, our school has one) to attempt to talk over my identity issues, I was treated like child “poisoned by the woke west”. My gender dysphoria around my breasts were brushed off with “they weren’t that big to begin with” and my dislike of culturally feminine words’ use on me was also not treated with understanding. 

After that unsatisfactory experience, I want to create a platform where queer teens can share their experience and talk to each other with understanding that we share. I want a place where we can express our own ideas in an inclusive environment, and for Chinese queer teens to be able to contact openly queer teens from all around the world without the limitations of the Great Firewall of China. May Queer Teens grow to become this platform. 

What can you do?

1. Share stories of yourself

Askbox and submissions are always open. Anonymous submissions are welcome! We may translate your content to post to Chinese platforms so please inform us if you don’t want that to happen.

2. Recommend books that gave you new insight

Our members are currently reading feminism and queer theory books for future recommendation, and we greatly appreciate your opinions!

3. Express your ideas through asks or submissions

We aim to create an inclusive space for queer teens around the world, so please be polite in discussions. TERFs, homophobes and trolls will be blocked.

4. Seek help from us if you need to

The aforementioned non-binary lesbian admin usually runs this blog (Yes I am unfortunately chronically online). If you want to talk, send me a message and I will overcome my social anxiety to help you at all times. Be aware that none of us has gone through professional training and it would be better to seek professional help if needed. 

5. Join us!

If you are interested in running this blog with us together, we’re glad to make our community larger! We are still just starting up, so things may be a bit messy. Otherwise, we’ll happy to accept new participants!

[littlemisssatanist]

on the topic of me being team green

a bit of a different post for me, considering what my blog is, but i was honestly so offended at being called a misogynist i made a fresh google docs page and typed out 1634 words of me ranting.

is there a real reason to post this? probably not, but i felt the need to establish myself as team green, considering all the posts i've been liking and commenting on lately. (if you are team green, and you see this, feel free to be my friend. in fact, i am begging you to be my friend. i have no tg friends and i need to see the light).

beware, typos and repitition are probably aplenty.

Whenever I see people talk about being TG, I always will see TB stans in the comments saying something along the lines of “Oh, you must be a misogynist, then.” And you know, it never happened to me until a few days ago when I commented on a TikTok post about Rhaenyra beefing with two-year-old Aegon. Someone replied to me, saying that I only brought it up because I’m a misogynist.

And. You know, I’ve been insulted before. I’ve been called ugly, stupid, immature, whatever whatever. But I honestly can’t think of a worse thing for someone to say to me, that I’m a misogynist. I know this isn’t that commentator’s fault, because they obviously don't know me. But the irony of calling me a misogynist when I am the most misandristic person to exist on this earth. I pray for the downfall of men daily. I make fun of them. Whenever I see an AITA post on TikTok, I am immediately on the woman’s side, regardless of what she may have done. 

It’s because I distrust men to a certain degree. You know what’s different for ASoIaF, though? It’s not real. It’s all fiction. TB stans will come on the internet daily and complain about TG existing, calling us misogynists, elevating the conflict between us to that of a literal genocide. Are y'all delusional? Are you guys stuck so far up Rhaenyra’s ass that you can’t tell reality from fiction? 

Y’all love to preach about how Rhaenyra is the number one feminist girlboss of Westeros, without realizing exactly how exactly you’re falling into the trap. You uphold a woman because she’s the heir, meanwhile she steals Rhaena’s and Baela’s inheritance in order to put her illegitimate sons on the throne (which, btw, is treason). But of course you guys wouldn’t care, because you like to think Rhaenyra is the exception to the rule.

That’s the thing. She’s only the exception because of her father, the king. After Viserys dies, she suddenly finds herself back in the same patriarchal world that y’all love to claim she’s trying to overthrow, that she’s trying to change. 

I don’t hate Rhaenyra because she’s a woman. I hate her because she’s a stupid woman. She knew exactly what it meant to be a woman in Westeros; she gets forced into an unwanted marriage (and even in that she gets far more freedom and will to choose than other women), she is undermined for being a woman, and others view her as unfit to rule. I would sympathize with her if she did absolutely anything to change that whatsoever. 

Y’all love to say that she’s so iconic with her dragon scenes, but what did that really accomplish aside from showcasing she is unfit to rule? She has three illegitimate sons who look absolutely nothing like her. Even if Viserys was on her side, everyone knows that they are bastards. Like, at least Cersei’s bastards looked like her. Rhaenyra was a white woman with white hair married to a black man with white hair, and her first three children are white boys with brown hair. Girl, if you were going to have bastards, at least do it with someone that bears at least some resemblance to your husband, or yourself. She purposefully made it harder for herself.

And for those of you guys who will bring up something about Laenor being gay. I genuinely don’t know how to tell you this, but if they truly cared about keeping up appearances, they would have had children. I say this as a queer person myself: If I were in Laenor’s shoes, I would have children with my coverup. Afterall, that’s what a coverup is for. And also: I could find nothing about Laenor being infertile. 

And for those who will also bring up Laenor accepting the Strong boys as his own, I literally couldn't care less. Everyone and their grandmother could see that those boys were bastards. Laenor accepting them and Viserys being delusional doesn’t change the fact that they were illegitimate, and everybody knew it. Secondly: Rhaenyra would need to admit the boys were bastards in the first place for anybody to claim them, something she did not do. In fact, she went so far the opposite way, I wouldn’t be surprised if she managed to delude herself that they were legitimate. 

And this I don’t understand. How do you shoot yourself in the foot, not once, not twice, but three times, with three obvious bastards, knowing that people would oppose you, people already oppose you, and still think yourself fit to rule? Every decision Rhaenyra makes is so stupid, it’s almost mind blowing to me. To live in Dragonstone for years while your father, the king, is sick (in which case, btw, the heir is supposed to step in to rule). Instead, we see Alicent ruling the kingdoms from behind the shadow, because Rhaenyra does nothing but live out a couple of years of bliss and comes back to King's Landing expecting everything to be handed to her. She does absolutely no politicking, absolutely nothing in order to sway the lords to her side. Should she be so surprised, then, that she is met with such resistance? 

Y’all TB stands love to call TG misogynistic because we don’t worship your perfect little dragon lady, as if her uncle-husband isn’t Lord of Fleabottom and grooms and rapes her from a young age. As if Daemon hasn’t called women whores and bitches, and his first wife, Rhea Royce, ‘Bronze Bitch.’ Like, is that not disgusting to you? Y’all love to preach about how Daemon loved Rhaenyra, as if he didn’t choke her the moment she disagreed with his methods. As if his first instinct everytime is anger and death and war.

(In case y’all couldn’t tell, I am extremely anti-war. I am under the impression that if you can’t solve things by talking it out, then you are definitely not mature enough to be ruling a kingdom, and Daemon is one of the most immature rapist misogynists I’ve ever had the displeasure of seeing).

(As an aside, I am not blaming Rhaenyra for her relationship with Daemon. Yes, I do find that most of her actions are stupid, but I cannot deny the fact that she was groomed and raped by him-- yes, raped, because she was a child, and children cannot consent. That is in no way her fault, and Daemon is the one responsible for this).

Y’all praise Rhaenyra for her maternal instincts while simultaneously hating Alicent for hers. Of course, an eye for an eye is unreasonable and far too much, but a son for a son is totally reasonable and to be expected. Rhaenyra protecting her children is being a good mother, but Alicent (rightfully) assuming that her children would be persecuted if Rhaenyra ascended the throne is her being a jealous bitch. Y’all blow her “sweet sister” line so much out of proportion, saying that she wouldn’t have killed her siblings if they just came over to her side. As if Alicent’s children, Alicent’s family, would choose Rhaenyra over her. Because “Helaena was the only good green” and “if only she just joined Rhaenyra”. Why would she ever do that? Because Aegon was a bad husband? The show literally stated that he only ever laid with her when he was drunk, because he couldn't do it otherwise. Obviously neither of them sought any pleasure from it, but they are still family. Helaena only had Aemond, Aegon, Daeron, and Alicent. Why would Rhaenyra ever be worth what her family is worth to her?

On a similar note, TB stans will constantly say how “oh, I feel sorry for younger Alicent, but not older Alicent.” As if Alicent wasn’t a 14 year old girl groomed and abused, as if she wasn’t twice pregnant by 17. As if Alicent wasn’t a victim doing her best in a world specifically designed against her.

That’s the difference between her and Rhaenyra. Both were victims to a much older man, but Rhaenyra considered herself an exception. Alicent had no choice but to be the bad guy, and despite how much y’all love to ignore it, Rhaenyra should have done the same. “Oh but Alicent was jealous of Rhaenyra!” Like you wouldn’t also be jealous of Rhaenyra? Rhaenyra, the perfect little princess, loved by her rapist daddy the king, who had everything handed to her on a silver platter. Would you not also be infuriated by her attitude, the entitled way she views the world? I’m sorry, but if your “strong female character” needs every other female character to agree with her, then she’s not that strong. Or a girlboss.

In conclusion, Rhaenyra sucks and is a terrible role model. True feminists love Alicent Hightower. Also, negative comments will be deleted, bc yk what is so fun about the internet? You can block people. I know, crazy concept. If you don’t want to see me or other TG on your for you page, consider blocking them. That tends to get rid of the thing you don’t want to see. I will also be doing this to anyone who thinks they’re smart enough to argue this topic with me. I do not care, hope your day goes terribly. <3

Btw, please never call me a misogynist again. In fact, you can call me Little Miss Misandrist, because there is no universe out there where I side with a man over Alicent Hightower. Or any woman at all, for that matter. 

(Except for maybe if the pickings were between Rhaenyra and Criston. If you’re one of the media illiterate TB stands who consider Criston to be an incel, you should also go ahead and block me, your stupidness is draining my brain cells).

Stay mad, xoxo.

[happysleepyhypno]

Hiii everybody!!

Thanks so much for 100 followers 💕😵‍💫💕

I figured now would be a good time to introduce myself! 

You can call me Happy, or Happy Sleepy.  I am a bi, non-binary hypno switch in their late twenties.  I loooove getting stoned and watching / making hypno content 💕

You can use any pronouns you like for me!   

I’m just here to try to make fun stuff and get better at making hypno content.  I will make and share content for whatever I’m feeling at the moment, but what I’m into includes some taboo stuff.  

Consider this a warning that this blog will share hypnotic and erotic content that is inappropriate for minors, and content that may be harmful for those with photosensitive epilepsy.  This blog may share content that sexualizes misogyny, forced feminization, forced gender transition, and forced gender detransiton.  This blog may also share Bambi/Bambi adjacent content and similarly intense hypnotic content.  Please engage at your own risk.  If you don’t like it, please just move along.

 - - serious IRL type talk below, if you’re not in the right headspace for that, skip down to the row of heart emojis- -

For your comfort and safety, I want to state explicitly that I am doing it all for the kink, especially the pro-misogyny and detransition content I share.  IRL I am a feminist who most people perceive as a cis gay man, and I was assigned female at birth.  

Coming of age into a misogynist society as a girl/ closeted trans person broke my brain, and now I think that playing around with misogyny between consenting adults is hot 🤷‍♀️  

In this day and age, I strongly believe that women and trans people deserve to fully relax and fully engage with their sexuality when they have the bandwidth to do so.  Relaxing and letting go in our private lives is necessary in order to stand our ground in a world not made for us.   

So keep dropping deep here, letting go of your worries here, so that you can keep surviving out there.  They make this world fucking hard for us, but we will keep going.  

I love you.

anyways… 

💕💖💕💖💕💖💕💖💕💖💕

here’s a run down of what I’m into and what you’ll see on this blog:

💖

-Being horny for all genders

-Hypnosis

-Mind control

-Feminization

-De-trans feminization 

-Misogyny kink

-breeding

-cock worship

-bimbofication

-intox kink (420)

-praise kink

-dom/sub

-bondage

-cnc as it relates to hypnosis/ mind control 

-pet play

-light age play

❌

-bodily fluids (excluding cum)

-extreme pain or degradation 

-gore and vore

-incxct 

-non-hypnotic cnc

-hypnosis where the idea of it being permanent or harmful to you irl is a central theme (exception for if it’s framed as a fantasy)

-pxdo/zoo obviously 

My inbox is open but I probably will not reply consistently!  Would LOOOVE feedback on the files I make of ideas for future files! 

Thanks for dropping by!

💕😵‍💫💕

[pokegyns]

Reclaiming “TIRF”

now i won’t say i personally call myself a tirf, and i absolutely respect the choice of any radfems who refuse to call themselves tirfs because that sounds like radfeminism centers trans people, i believe transmascs deserve to feel safe & respected within feminist spaces, as radfeminism (despite being heavily misrepresented) does have a tendency to mistreat transmascs & dismiss their struggles, as well as pretend dysphoria isn’t real/cannot ever be neurological. gender critical transmascs & their allies should have the right to reclaim the term tirf, similarly to how radfems who aren’t actual transphobes but have been called terfs have the right to reclaim the term terf. true nuancefems, who can be critical of gender whilst still not being discriminatory to trans people.

i understand that a lot of radfems who aren’t close-minded on trans topics call themselves terfs in an ironic way, to mock tras when they start with the harassment. but we also have to keep in mind that there has been a slow, but rising trend of conservative women co-opting our terms. they are downright right-wing & bigoted. they often tend to also target intersex women, detrans women, black & brown women– and generally everyone who they can call a “dirty male invading (white) women’s spaces”. their ideology is built on vulgar materialism, eurocentrism & white supremacy. they support transvestigating, and they want to achieve their goals of “total female protection” through invasive measures such as inspection of genitals. we shouldn’t jump to say “this never happens”– it does. mainstream tras often protect horrible people within their community, fearing that even simple criticism of “their own” will destroy their reputation, when it would actually improve it. they refuse to outcast those people, while outcasting others who merely disagree with them on an ideological level. this proves their corrupt immaturity & inability to conversate with understanding & nuance. we shouldn’t be like them. we need to outcast the genuinely hateful people, and show that they have no place in our community. they aren’t our allies. while i don’t believe that women can systemically harm trans women (i do, however, believe they can systemically harm trans men, though in a very very limited way, but the focus should be directed at cis men & not at them when talking about antitransmasculinity), women can definitely be hateful & still perpetuate & uphold bigotry & discrimination. these people also often use ableist slurs & call disabled people sensitive when they call them out, as well as using fetishistic slurs against trans people, especially against transfems. they often use conservative talking points & portray trans people in a weird & derogatory manner, mocking surgeries & bodies.

on the other hand, there are a lot of women who aren’t intersexist, racist, or otherwise bigoted– but they still tend to be close-minded on trans issues. they are often 100% anti-transition under every circumstance. i don’t believe ostracizing & outcasting them would be productive, as they often are detrans women who empathize with dysphoric people, but because the affirming-model harmed them, they harbor a lot of pent-up anger & express it in an extremist way. we should be conversating with them & exchanging opinions, but we still should be very careful not to harm the trans people in our own community & we shouldn’t force one-on-one conversation if the trans people in our community feel uncomfortable with that. i myself used to call myself a terf, but i feel quite uncomfortable with that, being trans myself– although i’ve been called one on multiple occasions. nowadays, simple things such as acknowledging biology & sexuality are considered terfy, it’s laughable.

i felt aversion to the term “tirf” for a little while, as there has been a recent boom of liberal feminists realizing that militant feminists are starting to mock them, so they started co-opting feminist branches. some of them call themselves intersectional feminists, although intersectional feminism is not its’ own school of theory. others call themselves marxist feminists without reading any theory, as they believe it’s simply the trans-inclusive alternative to radfeminism. some of them are starting to call themselves radfems, but they are always extra careful to preface that they are trans-inclusive. of course, libfems don’t give a damn about dysphoric people– they just weaponize our pain & scream “choice!” at everything they encounter. they are simply afraid of being mocked by feminists. there is, however, a portion of tirfs who are generally just afraid of being judged by tras. i do not think they can be considered real radfems (even if they express otherwise radfem views; anti-porn, anti-sw, anti-beauty industry, etc.), as radfeminism is inherently gender abolitionist, but we need to be welcoming to them, as they are usually nicefems whose fears should be understood. a lot of us were once in their position. being mean to them is counterproductive, we should let them go through their own journey of peaking.

i still personally feel levels of aversion to the term tirf, but if more actual nuanced radfems start using the term, maybe it will boom into some unexpected rising branch of nuanced radfeminism. radfems who, despite not actually being transphobic, can feel free to call themselves “terfs” in a mocking sense, as i believe it’s harmless. we shouldn’t mimic mainstream tra behavior & lock ourselves up in another echo-chamber, except this time instead of it being a tra echo-chamber it would be a magical tirf echo-chamber or whatever. shouting “op is a terf!” would just bring about unnecessary alienation. it would just remind me once again of the times i felt pressured to repress my beliefs & add a “terfs dni!” disclaimer every time before making a slightly-more-than-mainstream feminist point. but we should still be careful of making the trans people within our own community feel safe, and not letting actual genuine transphobes (so, not gender criticals & gender abolitionists & homosexuals, geez, i mean the actual hateful transphobes) in our spaces. i feel the term “terf” is not a good enough descriptor anyway, since the people who co-opt our terms to make bad faith (often conservative) points are not only discriminatory against trans people, but also people of color, intersex people, disabled people, detrans people & often also gay people. we can call out hate & bad faith points without alienating ourselves from our community, and we can outcast horrible people within our community without using meaningless terms to throw at them, the very same terms that are used against us 24/7 anyway as well.

– mod zoroark

[femsolid]

I have a confession. I’ve considered myself a radical feminist for almost a decade. I try to abide by my feminist values in every area of my life, from what media I consume, the friends I keep, refusing to date men, never dressing uncomfortably, no makeup, speaking up for women, volunteering, etc. But despite all of this, I think I am going to get plastic surgery and I feel really guilty about that. The thing is, I am frequently called ugly by strangers when I go out, despite grooming myself well and dressing competently. I was also bullied in school of course, but for some reason I get worse abuse as a grown adult. Groups of people, usually men and teens, will harass me in the street, even when I’m in my car, calling me hideous, telling me to cover my face with a bag, stuff like that. Lots of people have told me I look better with a mask on. The other day, I was volunteering, and a small child talking to his mother mentioned that I had an ugly face. Even my friends, when I had them, would overtly pity me for the way my face looks.

I honestly can’t take it anymore. I need the comments to stop, I am not strong enough to deal with this whenever I try to go out and do something with myself. I don’t even want to be pretty or anything, I just want to be average, unremarkable. I hate the idea of giving money to a plastic surgeon and putting my face in their hands, and my parents will also be ashamed of me for doing it, but I have to do something because I can’t live like this anymore.

I know going through with this will be hypocritical so I guess I will have to stop considering myself a radical feminist, and that hurts too. But I’ve hit a breaking point. I need things to change, now, and I’m willing to take the risk and throw away my values if it will grant me a chance to make the comments and stares and abuse and pity stop. I just can’t take it any more.

We all make compromises in life. I'm an anticapitalist, yet I work for a corporation because I need a roof over my head and food on the table. You think women should not care about their looks and that plastic surgeons exploit women's insecurities, but you want to get plastic surgery so that people stop harassing you. Ultimately, we are humans. And we are living in a world that doesn't necessarily share our values.

There are a lot of people who are mocked for their appearance in the world. People who look unusual, people who have a certain ethnicity, fat people, hairy women, disabled people, etc. We're not all going to the plastic surgeon, obviously. Most of us live as we are. I think it's money you could use for better things. I think it's not worth risking your life. And I think the only work you need is in not valuing the stupidity and cruelty of idiots who are not worth it. Obviously, it's your life, and you decide what you do with it. Cosmetic surgery is legal, unfortunately, so if you want to do it you can.

[the-heartbreak-prince]

Being a genderqueer radical feminist is the most confusing shit ever.

I don’t consider myself trans, I have gender dysphoria, but transitioning implies I wish to change my gender, I just want to be free of gender. I’m more butch than anything else

I feel like I’m the only one who can acknowledge problems in the trans and radfem communities. I see that acceptance ONLY can cause problems, but I think those problems are highly over exaggerated by reactionary terfs. Select few horrific trans people are often chosen and spread around to represent every trans person.

It’s impossible to address trans topics without nuance. Each trans person is different, making legislation virtually impossible.

[femconstellation]

Pinned - about me!

Hello! I’m CJ, and I am a radlearning feminist. I have considered myself a feminist for years, but was pretty much brainwashed by liberal feminism for years despite always feeling iffy on libfem’s views on topics like porn and prostitution. I only started calling myself a radical feminist in the past couple of months, so please forgive me if I’m not well-versed on radfem lingo and phrases. I am also still educating myself on a lot of topics.

I am 21, I don’t shave, I have almost completely stopped wearing makeup (I only stopped wearing makeup the past few months but I havent done it as a routine in over a year), and I have been attempting to be more vocal about my boundaries with misogynists (and as an autistic woman, I tend to be a pushover without realizing).

I am autistic and a lesbian. I also have a small yuri manga collection :)

I don’t call myself a terf, but I won’t coddle a male who believes himself to be a woman.

My asks are open! I also want to clarify that because I’m autistic, I struggle with wording. Be patient with me!

[vexingwoman]

do you ever have those moments of guilt for what you believe in? I was crypto until someone outed me in real life, and the way I’m completely shunned is making rethink everything I thought was true. I can’t tell anymore if I really am just a common bigot or if everyone’s gone insane. I wish there were more resources for “terfs” who have been outed against their will. It’s scary, and the community *never* talks about what to do.

It seems pretty stupid to feel like a bigot for believing in sexual dimorphism but hey. If someone said the sky was green and berates you for thinking otherwise….wouldn’t you just start thinking the sky is green. Or at least wanting to.

Yes, in the beginning stages of my peak, watching women who I considered highly intelligent defending this sexist nonsense constantly made me doubt myself. I used to contact some of these women with my ideological concerns and ask for their input, because back then I was still convinced there was surely something I just wasn’t getting. I still had hope that someone could offer something other than circular definitions or uselessly obscure non-answers, but they never did. Every single person I attempted to have this conversation with simply stopped replying when I rejected their sophism and pressed for actual clarifications.

There was this one non-binary female I was debating who said, “No matter what you think, we will always continue to exist” which was so contrived I could only roll my eyes. But then I kept thinking about that statement and why it didn’t sit right with me. I realized it was because despite how much the TQ+ community declares that gender is a social construct, they fail to see their gender identities as something contingent on that social construct. 

They depict their gender identities as something innate, something they are born with, something comparable to being black, disabled, homosexual, or any other demographic that would continue to exist independently of social constructs. That could be why you’re so doubtful; you’re being made to believe that rejecting trans ideology is the same as being racist, ableist, and homophobic, when in reality it’s more similar to rejecting religion, conservatism, conspiracy theories, etc. You are not rejecting a person, you are rejecting an idea—a regressive and harmful idea at that. 

I also think it’s objectively observable that trans ideology has far more overlaps with homophobia and misogyny than radical feminism does. Ie., trans ideology asserts that if you’re feminine, you must be a woman. Homophobes and misogynists assert that if you’re a woman, you must be feminine. Both of these groups are upholding the same sexist stereotypes, just in reversed ways.

On the other hand, radical feminists don’t believe femininity has anything to do with being a woman at all. Anyone who is intellectually honest can tell who the real bigots are. Unfortunately, trans ideology is anything but intellectually honest. It relies on deceit through word-play, circular definitions, and sophism because intellectual honesty would reveal how unsound, sexist, homophobic, and regressive this ideology actually is.

[banishedchildofeve]

,, warning, a rant post,,, mentions of s*x work and p*rn in our society below.

A girl at my work asked me why I wasn’t agreeing with her as she and another workmate of ours discussed modern feminism. I was listening, to be polite, as there was nothing else much to do and no customers, and not saying anything. I’m usually quiet at work, but she seemed to take offence to my silence, as if I should be interjecting into the conversation to express how much I agreed with her.

I told her that I don’t believe modern feminism is always a good thing, and before I could even explain myself, she gave me a horrid look and said “right, because it’s easier to do nothing and get all that male approval, isn’t it?”

It was mean and I blinked at her, affronted and confused. Usually people let me explain when this topic comes up and I voice my opinions, if I have to, as I like to not cause conflict. Normally, I explain how I feel, very politely, about issues that feminism has brought up for women like the normalisation of abortion, contraceptives and dangerous hormone-changing pills, not marrying or even trying to find love, ‘sex work’ being seen as powerful etc etc.

I usually use my example of “girlboss” culture to help people understand how I’m not trying to be hostile or anything, but this workmate didn’t even let me and walked off to go talk to the manager who we’re all really good friends with. The other workmate I was with looked confused too and she joked about the awkwardness of what had happened, and I brushed it off but on the train home I was thinking about it again.

I was thinking about how often wives, mothers, homemakers and nuns/sisters/friars etc. are looked down on, often by feminists because they aren’t some business woman who only wears tight office-chic blazers and gets drunk every weekend and posts bikini pics. I thought about the young girls who dream of homemaking and wifehood, and the women who choose it over a career, and who are sort of viewed as pathetic or weak or ‘old fashioned.’

I’ve been told firsthand that my dream of being a mother isn’t good enough and how I “need to decide on a real career path,” or “something other than that, at least.” I’ve been made to feel small or stupid or that I’m offending all the women across all the generations who worked hard for our rights.

And this hurts, because I love women. I look up to who I consider to be the best feminine influence in all of human history, Mother Mary, daily. And I felt confused as I thought, because isn’t it all about choice?

Why is my choice less valuable than hers? Why is my choice to abstain until marriage, not drink coffee or try this pill or that drug or this drink something that I should be embarrassed about? Why is my modest mufti day outfit at school earning me stares and causing snide remarks? Why are we bringing up girls to believe that being a p**n star something empowering, something to do to “make a quick buck.”

Why are we letting young and influential girls believe that their worth comes only from their body, their aptness at reeling in boys, the size of their boobs, the way they dress and how many drinks it takes them before they’re throwing up at a house party outside on the lawn?

Why are we letting men, husbands, boyfriends believe that their wife/girlfriend/fiancé’s body is something that they can both benefit off if they just film that one video, or take that one photo? Why is it okay for a man to watch p*rn while his wife sleeps next to him?

Why is “she has an OF,” an insult, or something that takes away from her worth? Despite the fact she doesn’t feel beautiful unless a man is complimenting her body? How is this her fault? What could she have possibly done? She’s been taught that her body is all that guys care about. She believes that if she doesn’t do this act or send that photo she is wasting his time, she’s not worth his time.

It makes me sad. I hear younger girls talk in the bathroom at work while I’m in their cleaning or whatever about how this boy sexted them this, or how this other boy’s invited her over to his house on this time and how she’s been watching tutorials on how to … well, you know.

It makes me feel sick. These girls don’t know the danger they’re in. They’re being raised in an online world where it’s trendy to wear tiny shirts and post photos of your butt.

Most of the girls I overhear talk of things like this look 14-15.

This is not their fault.

They’re not to blame. It’s the world we let them indulge in. It’s a world where they’ve seen and heard and tried so much before they’re even able to legally get behind the wheel of a car and drive. Before they’ve even taken a proper exam at school.

When our frontal lobes detach, we become so ignorant to danger. Teenagers drive fast, do drugs, dance on the railings of bridges above highways and believe they’re invincible. It’s natural, sure, to an extent. But this is the time when so much can go wrong. Innocence cannot be returned.

I hate to think of how many girls will realise just how groomed and shaped they were by this toxic culture that surrounds us as a society later on and wish they hadn’t done this or that.

I want to protect these girls. I want to comfort them and keep them from these horrible, evil ideologies and that fuel harmful industries and create dirty, satantic fetishes in which people profit and people enjoy.

I want the girls who only dream of marriage and having kids to be safe and protected. I want girls who think it’s cool to smoke cigarettes and steal their parent’s booze to be safe and protected. I want the girls who dream of being billionaires and dating 40 men to be safe and protected.

Young girls are so influential and I wish there were better role models to show them that there is life and beauty and comfort and promise in the life that is ‘old fashioned’ and ‘anti-feminism.’

There is new life in Christ, always, of course. But I really wish the evil didn’t get there first.

I want to raise my own daughters in a world where it’s not okay to watch p*rn and use social media and consider sex work “empowering.”

I want girls and women to see that their worth does not come from how they look; but from within. From their heart, from their charity, from their kindness, from their humility, from their love of helping others, from the words they choose each day.

Of course this means we must make changes now, and step by step, starting with ourselves and our behaviour and headspace and habits. Changing for good can change others for good, inspire good, produce good, spread good.

Our daughters are relying on us.

Okay rant over, God bless all who read this. I hope you’re okay.

<3

(i wrote this awhile ago and just let it sit in the drafts. sorry it isn’t structured well. i was getting v emotional when i was writing this oop lol. i’m not here to have arguments, i hate arguing and it’s even worse online w literal strangers. i just am so sick of all this evil and damage being disguised as “pro women” and “feminism” and to speak out against it is to sound like a woman-hater, which is the last thing i am. the last thing a girl my age could ever be smh).

[annabtg]

I thought your answer on jily and whether or not they were in love or if it was abusive super interesting!

Personally I’m not the biggest jily fan but that has more to do with the main tropes being used that I tend to find tiring and outdated. But Ive been trying to get more into it recently and it’s been hard finding fics I enjoy because they are either too snape bash-y or feel anachronistic in how they portray the relationship. When im reading jily I actually prefer the writer to lean into the outdated tropes instead of trying to make it fit the modern readers ideas of appropriate courtship behavior, because otherwise it doesn’t feel authentic to me. Specifically it bugs me when they make James a super feminist that would never ask Lily out more than once (I don’t think he’d recognize that as sexual harassment as a teenager boy in the 70s). I get that this is popular fanon right now but it’s been hard to find a fic that doesn’t have this.

So my question is do you have any jily fic recommendations that fit this description (minimal Snape bashing and time period accurate)?

Hi there!

By your wording, I'm not sure if by "time period accurate" you mean fics where he actually asks her out a lot. The beginning of your post seemed to imply that, even though I would argue that it's not the only time period accurate headcanon. Indeed, there are plenty of reasons someone in the 70s may not have repeatedly asked a girl out - from his ego being bruised by her first rejection, to he actually took no for an answer and that doesn't necessarily mean he's a super feminist icon. Not everyone who takes no for an answer is. :p

You may have more luck with old-time fic, tbh - the "ask her out a million times" trope was much more prevalent then, and people were not as feministically aware :p though Snape bashing was much more common. I actually feel that in most newer Jily canon fics Snape is portrayed as a well-rounded antagonist, rather than bashed.

So I'm going to start with some oldies:

I recently read Commentarius by @bcdaily and, while I wouldn't say I got the perfect 70s vibe from it (more like the 90s - it felt very accurate to the way I grew up), I enjoyed seeing in it a portrayal of James that I think most people wouldn't dare write today for fear, exactly, of him not being feminist/respectful enough to Lily. I won't get into details to avoid spoilers. (Very long and incomplete, but considered a classic.)

I also hear The Life And Times by Jewels5 features an immature James who grows up throughout the fic, but I haven't read it so I couldn't tell you myself. (Also very long and incomplete and considered a classic.)

If you enjoy the idea of James being an outrageous little shit for comedic effect, you might enjoy Procrastinator-starting2moro's fics. I haven't read Obsessive Lily Disorder since 2006 so I can't say I remember it very well but the title should give you an idea of how insistently he asks her out in it :p though there may be some Snape bashing in it.

For more recent works, I will gladly recommend everything by @nought-shall-go-ill, who creates the most atmospheric depictions of 70s/80s UK, and also likes Snape and enjoys nuanced portrayals of Jily.

Other writers whose portrayals of James I thoroughly enjoy and who do a great job of presenting James as the little shit that he is include @annasghosts and @ohmygodshesinsane.

And to finish with some self-recs, anything in my James Potter Is A Little Shit tag should be a good bet. I would give a shout-out to my older fics Birthday and Fascination, and my newer ones Written In History and Drunk With Power as the ones you may enjoy the most. And I'll gladly tout readers' favourites The Great James Potter and Mistletoe Mishaps as examples where James is respectful to Lily in ways that I feel are natural and reasonable for the era, all while he's still a little cocky shit.

Hope this helps! Happy reading!!

[girlgerard]

something about last nights show specifically just felt so personal and vulnerable and intimate. but not in a timid way. in a loud and proud and "i'm not scared anymore" way. in an encouraging way. "BE WHO THE FUCK YOU ARE" because its the most powerful way to fight back in this world

something i’ve been talking with friends about over discord is that gerard’s demonstrated so many times he’s really really terrified of like. appropriating communities he’s not part of. obviously they’re white so they do it anyway but in issue’s of feminism and the trans community they’ve always used extremely careful language to not. take what they think they don’t deserve? like for example i remember this interview from 2016 where a woman asked him do you consider yourself a feminist and he gave this really winding answer where they were like ‘of course i support it more than anything but i can’t call myself the title because i’m not a woman and have never experienced what a woman goes through and i don’t deserve such an honor :((‘ which obviously. not how that works BUT that’s how they think of things apparently sbejfbejf.

anyway they did that with the trans community too. they couldn’t shut up about how much they loved trans people from 2014-2015 like they talked about it every single HA show. but he never used language that included himself besides that one time they said ‘we’.

but this tour. this tour feels the opposite. not only are they including themself in the language but they’re literally dressing as traditional ig ‘feminist icons’ like joan of arc and jackie o and most importantly they’re not explaining it. if this was an ally moment he’d let us know. it just feels so warm idk. again i have a fever so please excuse me if this makes zero sense

[kiefbowl]

Why don’t you consider yourself a radfem?

I've answered this before probably more in detail, but idk if I'll be able to find it quickly. but anyway:

I'm not one who feels compelled to have a super specific label for all my ideological beliefs

I feel like if you want to claim a label you have to be pretty sure and fairly knowledgeable. I don't want to half ass call myself a radical feminist. I'm comfortable admitting I might not know all that much about it as opposed to, say, feminism in general.

there's so much to explore with feminist thought, and so much we could still create together as women. I feel like I'm young and exploring. I'm still learning! so feminist feels comfortable to call myself, anything else feels like putting on a show

the secret fourth reason is that I don't want to contribute to the idea that "real feminism" is radical feminism, and "fake feminism" is liberal feminism, and then that's it. radical feminism and liberal feminism are two schools of thought within feminism, and are not the only ones. people on here will call things that aren't feminism "libfem" and then also have very liberal ideas themselves, so it feels like it's undermining the authenticity of feminism as a worthwhile scholarly pursuit for women because there is a habit to short-hand these ideas as identity markers rather than, you know, a theory or philosophy or social analysis worth studying critically. like, as a little self-exam, what is liberal about liberal feminism? if you don't know you need to go do some reading :) that should be exciting, yay! :)