#i also don't know how in character she is either

[sleepynoons]

hi op feel free to ignore everything under - all you need to know is i love your writing *shakes head vigorously*

there are several things i think were immaculately done, but that'd require me to churn out an entire research paper, which i don't have the brain cells for anymore post-finals. so here are some scattered thoughts yep and yap

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i don't gravitate towards mysterious or reserved characters because my personality simply doesn't mesh well with them. in fact, when i was watching wbk, i was always so wary of suo, and felt lowkey a lil uncomfortable with him LMFAO

but strangely enough, i think this discomfort became a very integral and driving force throughout my reading experience. of course, this was already the case due to the violent and dark nature of yakuzas, underground sex work, etc., but emphasizing suo's yandere-ness and how he doesn't shy away from it really completed the tone of the story. also, i feel like i came to terms with suo's character, which i rarely ever experience in general. really, this is all to say that it makes total logical sense in my brain to imagine a route where suo evolves into a yandere, and part of me strongly believes his real background in the wbk manga/anime won't be too happy-go-lucky either (otherwise the alternative would be like him wearing an eyepatch for the shtick bc he's a chuuni??? idrk????).

anyway, the reoccurring theme of redirection in suo's tactics really sealed the deal for me, and i think it was a good way to tie in references to his relationship to his master, the martial arts that we know he's especially good at, and how all of these things he's kinda exploited and sullied to "become a worse person for you." suo being very knowing and intentional is so snakey and creepy but also, i get a lil fucked up when it comes to men who are obsessed, so also incredibly erotic LMFAO i also just want someone to buy me a luxury penthouse out of concern for my safety *sad fist bump*

one thing i did find unexpected is suo's leadership within the yakuza. yes, necessary for the plot, otherwise he wouldn't be able to pull any strings. but because source material heavily emphasizes leaders as individuals like umemiya or sakura or even hiiragi, it's interesting to place suo in juxtaposition with them. not sure if it's bc i don't find suo particularly reliable in general, but i think this fic made me realize that he's still wise beyond his years and very, very ruthless. it's def very telling that, throughout the story, suo resorts to fear to assert power. anyway, i j think it was a particularly interesting detail to add in his role in the succession conflict.

btw, i do like how suo's change and transition isn't fully told or revealed. it's not a story meant for us, as it's a truth really for suo and reader. but even reader can't really keep up with him at times, and i find that dynamic really charming, as sadistic as that sounds. i like that reader is so vulnerable. i like that reader is not afraid to be vulnerable around him in the ways that matter, even when she's aware that he's fucking insane. and i really like that reader is aware of how much it takes to be vulnerable, so she doesn't push him. i think reader restrains herself (un)knowingly, and that's her way of loving him. obv less romantic in real life lol (don't try to fix anyone, been there, done that, lost myself, and still finding myself), but i do like how reader is suo's salvation :,,, even if she doesn't think she's particularly patient, she really is - like girl, Fuck Him Already!!!!!!

(could go on and on about how juicy the friction and tension is between suo and reader but that's for pt 2 hehehe)

this is kinda my half-assed transition into talking about reader, and honestly, my thoughts from earlier encapsulate the general thesis i have about her: she's really a lot like suo, way more than she thinks. i think she operates in very similar ways, just goes about it differently.

i think reader is way more reckless. she's very self-sacrificing. she's very good at putting up a front, even when she's internally low in confidence and self-respect. i think she just wants to be happy with suo, and hopefully, with their other friends as well.

and truly, i think suo has very similar end goals. i just think, with how things turned out, suo made the very calculated yet risky (also aggressive?) decision to do the things that he did. making their underlying principals and values and reactions so oddly similar, from my perspective, is sooooo neat, and it adds more depth to why they go so well together.

also, reader is so brilliantly the comedic relief in this whole thing. usually, in storytelling, it's someone else and is used as fodder. i really like how reader is a lil awkward and bad with timing and everything else, cause it makes the reading experience flow so much better. really helped with the pacing of the story, gave it the character + breathing space needed to process everything. i also just like my readers a little fucking hilarious.

anyway, op, so beautifully written - see you in pt 2 gg

TOKYO VICE | part 1

You knew that if you agreed to move in with Suo, you'd be setting yourself up for a life without autonomy. You also knew that these alarming behaviours were all signs that he desperately needed therapy to process his master’s untimely death. Living with a man in constant grief, who refused to talk about his trauma unless he was making up a lie related to the nation of China, was probably not a good decision. Doubly so when this man was clearly paranoid about losing you, and triply so when he was a high-ranking member of a violent syndicate. Unfortunately for you, you rarely made good decisions. (Or: After joining the yakuza, Suo develops the concerning habit of controlling every facet of your life. This is somehow less worrying to you than your uncontrollable lust around him.)

8.7k words. suo x fem reader. deeply unserious yakuza au. yandere suo (not abusive and reader is into it), dark comedy, a little angst, smut. warnings: borderline sex work, off-screen criminal violence. nsft – no actual smut in this chapter, but there are still graphic discussions of sex. mdni. thank you to @sleepyqinfei for beta reading and to @/cafekitsune for the banner!

sequel to sincerity and this sakura/reader wip

part 2 here

You’re not exactly sure why you and Suo have never fucked.

It’s certainly strange, given that you're pretty sure that Suo has expressed at least passing interest in you over the years, and you have felt a lot of interest in him. (By ‘interest’, you mean that you feel an insatiable lust around him that you fight to ignore on a daily basis.) You can't exactly pinpoint why nothing has ever happened despite this mutual attraction, especially given your profession and indifferent feelings toward casual sex.

You can think of a number of probable reasons, which are separate from those you classify as stupid reasons. The latter class comprises silly concerns like a fear of rejection, fear of abandonment, fear of not being pretty enough, fear of not being good enough, et cetera. All very juvenile feelings—insecurities that you had in your teenage years, the days in which Suo ran around Makochi as a delinquent while you worked an honest job at a bar. (It was a girls’ bar in the red light district, but that's neither here nor there.) Your circumstances have since changed, and those anxieties have since faded. None of them have any material consequence for your current life, so you don't see any point in thinking about them.

The stupid reasons, then, definitely don't have anything to do with why you've never fucked Suo. But you can think of a few, more concrete reasons that may explain it. For one, Suo has been your friend since childhood and it’s generally a bad idea to have sex with your long-time friends. He was also your roommate for a while and it’s an even messier idea to have sex with your roommates. And now, in your adulthood, he’s your landlord in addition to being your boss, which makes him the worst possible person you could have sex with. You could lose both your home and your livelihood if things go south—both severe, material consequences that should theoretically keep your lust at bay.

Also, he's also a member of the yakuza.

Now, strictly speaking—you're not really opposed to having sex with violent criminals. It’s definitely not a good idea, but you don't usually have good ideas anyway. But for the past several years, you’ve been pissed at Suo for joining the yakuza in the first place, which actually does keep your blatant attraction to him in check. You simply dry up when you think too hard about all the feelings of betrayal.

When Suo was on the cusp of graduating from Furin and thinking about his future, you’d grabbed him by the collar and made him promise not to join the yakuza. They constantly tried to recruit from Bofurin, and they especially wanted Sakura, Suo, and Sugishita. You were adamant about chasing them off from Suo and Sakura whenever they approached—you had no need to worry about Sugishita, as Umemiya had already said he shouldn't talk to them, so there was no chance he was going to—and you begged Suo over and over not to join. Delinquency was fine, but a crime syndicate was something else altogether.

Suo seemed serious about it when he said he'd listen to you. He even applied to colleges, talked about maybe becoming a teacher and eventually supporting you so you could stop working in the mizu shobai industry. Back then, he often teased you by saying that you should marry him and be his housewife (or he could be your trophy husband, if you so wished). You thought he was joking, but with the way he always talked about his life after his degree, you wondered if he would seriously suggest it.

Of course, it was most likely just teasing, and you were fine with that. You were simply excited that he'd found a career that would make him happy. Nirei had also been accepted to university at that point, and even Sakura had an honest job lined up on Keisei Street. The future had looked bright for everyone.

Then Suo’s master died, and he lost his fucking mind.

The two of you buried Suo’s master in a Chinese funeral. He had never had children of his own, having satisfied his paternal instincts by picking up strays, and he didn't have much in the way of family in Japan either, so you and Suo performed the shou ling yourselves. One person kept a constant vigil over his body while the other searched on Google for what arrangements should be made next. After all, while Suo’s master had immersed his foremost disciple in his culture, he had never taught Suo any funerary customs. He hadn't thought there would be a need.

Suo didn't cry nearly as much as you, but he was probably in more pain. Your master had trained you a little bit when you were a kid, and he'd taken you in for a while after your parents kicked you out, so of course you were gutted. But he had practically raised Suo, so it was naturally worse for him. More shattering.

You often think about the first night you decided you'd sleep with him in the same futon because he was crying so much. He insisted he was fine, but he didn't complain when you got under the sheets with him and started thumbing away his tears. When you took off his eyepatch, you found, to your astonishment, that he was crying from his missing eye as well. Both of you thought the tear ducts had been destroyed in either the accident or the enucleation, but it appeared that not even that prior trauma could mask his grief over this one.

Nevertheless, by the time of the funeral procession, Suo had stopped crying.

“Master supported us and taught us to stand on our own two feet,” he said as the joss paper burned. He took your hand in his and smiled. “So it'll be fine. We’ll be okay on our own. I'll make sure of it.”

At the time, you had found this very comforting. You didn’t think too much of it, as you had a bad habit of relying on Suo for your emotional stability. His master had raised him to be an emotionally intelligent person, so it had been fine, even though you had a track record of reckless decisions. He’d still exercised endless patience with you. He never once got angry with you, nor did he ever force you to do what he felt was the right thing. Instead, he gently redirected your self-damaging behaviours—not so different from the martial art that he practised.

He disapproved of the run-down and lonely conditions of your apartment, so he spent a great deal of time there and helped make it into a proper home. He didn't like how dangerous your job at the girls’ bar was, so he walked you to and from work every night until you never left without him. He worried when you started having sex with your customers, especially when you began having nervous breakdowns over it (you were, after all, still a teenager and really only interested in having romantic vanilla sex with Suo), so he staged an intervention with Nirei and Sakura. In this way, Suo convinced you that you were loved and protected and didn't need to do something you hated so much. They would get you out if you felt trapped. And you didn't feel trapped, per se, so you left on your own—but it was still only because of them. You promised them afterwards that you'd never do it again.

This was Suo’s brand of kindness as a teenager. He always taught people, guided them away from harm rather than steering them—a behaviour he’d mimicked from your master. Your master, in general, had defined all of Suo’s values and his way of living, which was honest and gentle and conscientious. It was one where he used his abilities to protect the weak and care for his friends. He even kept his spiteful and alarmingly violent tendencies under control, though sometimes he slipped when fighting genuine assholes. But he still tried. He tried because he strived to be as kind as his master—who represented everything that Suo wanted to be in his adult life.

Thus, the death of Suo’s master meant the death of his principles. It changed the kind of man that Suo wanted to be. You don't want to say that he became a worse person, but he absolutely became a worse person.

He especially became a worse person with you.

As it turned out, Suo’s idea of making sure that the two of you would be fine on your own was, well, not really fine. It wasn’t that he became cruel to you, per se. It was more that whenever he saw a problem with your behaviour, his approaches to redirecting it became—put as nicely as possible—heavy-handed.

After your master’s death, you got a job at a high end, yakuza-owned club. Two weeks later, Suo broke his promise to you and joined the yakuza. So I can stay close to you, he explained gently, wiping away your tears as you cried hysterically, but you're convinced to this day that he did it partly out of spite. So a few years later, when you started having sex with your customers again and he tried to stop you, you decided to spite him back. I need to stay on top of the rankings, you'd explained dispassionately. The mamasan said it's fine, and the manager doesn't care. He even thinks it's good for business.

Suo’s response was to simply become the owner of your club.

This move was very extreme, but also very effective. Any customer who so much as brushed against you on the premises was instantly thrown out, and the mamasan started watching you like a hawk to make sure you weren’t going to any love hotels after work. Douhan were off-limits. For the first time since your teens, you became completely celibate—not only because of your new workplace circumstances, but because you simply didn't want to find out what Suo would do if you got together with a man he despised (and he despised every man you dated).

His most absurd play was when he became concerned about your living conditions again. Your latest apartment was too plain, too small, and the area was too dangerous. It didn't even have a shower, and the other tenants behaved concerningly toward you when you went to the bathhouse at night. But the rent was cheap, and it was still an upgrade from your last place, so you shrugged it off when Suo suggested that you move. Even when someone tried to accost you at night, you were nonchalant about it. You kicked the shit out of them in a fight and continued your routine unbothered.

The next month, Suo bought a luxury penthouse and suggested you move in with him.

His offer (command) came with conditions. One of the bigger ones was that you'd let him accompany you out at night if you ever needed to run errands in dangerous places. Or—nevermind, actually. He should really just accompany you everywhere at night. Maybe during the day too. And—ah, there was no way you'd be going to work alone, nor coming back by yourself—you were now always to be driven by someone in his organisation, if he wasn't available himself. Rent was a point of contention, when you asked about it: you wanted to pay at market rate, and he insisted that there was no need to pay at all. He ended up proposing a highly discounted price, which would give you ample financial freedom, but questionable financial independence.

These were insane terms. You knew that if you agreed, you'd be setting yourself up for a life without autonomy. You also knew that these behaviours were all signs that Suo desperately needed therapy to process his master’s untimely death. Living with a man in constant grief, who refused to talk about his trauma unless he was making up a lie related to the nation of China, was probably not a good idea. Doubly so when this man was clearly paranoid about losing you, and triply so when he was a high-ranking member of a violent syndicate. Case in point—he was likely connected to the brutal accident that later befell the man who tried to assault you.

“I'm not sure what you're implying, but at least he didn't die,” Suo said cheerfully when you confronted him about it. Which really meant: At least I decided not to kill him. This was a flag bigger and redder than any other you've ever known, and you consider yourself an expert in red flags. You knew you should run in the other direction.

So naturally, you put your arms around him, tenderly said, I'm sorry I've been worrying you, and then you moved in the next day.

While Suo treats you with endless patience, you have personal limits to the patience that you exercise with him. Specifically, your patience with how he treats you.

You don't mind the lack of social freedom, nor the lack of personal freedom, nor the lack of freedom of movement. You also don't mind living with a man full of intractable trauma surrounding the death of every parental figure in his life; in fact, you'd rather be by his side than not, if he needs to cope with something so painful. And anyway, your friendship is otherwise unchanged if you ignore the heavy restrictions he's imposed on every facet of your life. So that's all fine.

But the celibate lifestyle that he's cornered you into? You simply aren't built for it. Holy shit, do you need to get laid.

Nearly two years without sex has brought you close to another nervous breakdown (there have been few better sources of entertainment or validation in your life), and worst of all, it has made your profound lust for Suo incredibly hard to ignore. Waking up every morning to him in a towel, his hair still wet from the shower and his broad silhouette exposed, tests the absolute limits of your self-control. The contours of his lean and muscled form are distracting enough; coupled with the vivid colours and lines of his irezumi, the sight of him becomes maddening. It is a horrible thing to be exposed to when you haven't gotten any dick nor strap in over a year. It gives you thoughts about him that are overtly sexual, which is bad, as you have materially consequential reasons for not wanting to fuck Suo.

Things with him must absolutely stay platonic. But with sexual frustration like yours, being platonic with him means that you need to get erotic with someone else. A boyfriend or girlfriend is out of the question; you don't want to be responsible for yet another brutal accident. So you instead decide to quit your job at his club and start working on Keisei Street. At least this way, you can start fucking your customers again.

It’s a perfect plan. Suo’s oyabun is very indulgent toward him, and everyone else in the family respects him too. He consequently has a tight grip on his organisation and the territory they control, despite his relatively young age. Not a single person is ever to touch Keisei Street—largely because Sakura is part of Roppo-Ichiza, and Suo is nearly as weird about Sakura as he is about you. Plus, many of his other fellow Furin alumni are in the gang as well. If Suo’s men ever started fucking with people on Keisei Street, it would not only have grave implications for gang relations—it would be personally upsetting for Suo. This means you can fuck all the Keisei Street customers you want, and not get a single one of them threatened or killed.

A pretty brilliant idea, if you do say so yourself.

Suo’s expression doesn't change when you break the news to him. He delicately places his teacup—custom-made from Yixing, just like the matching clay teapot—down on the mahogany tabletop, and he looks at you with a calm smile.

“Come again?”

“I'm quitting my job at Red Dragon,” you repeat. “I already gave the mamasan my resignation.”

“And she accepted it?” Suo asks, in a tone that is so carefully nonchalant that you know it means he is actually furious with her. “How interesting,” he muses. “What brought this on?”

“I've found a better paying opportunity on Keisei Street.”

“I'll give you a raise,” he says easily.

“A raise?” You cock a brow. “The pay is mostly commission-based at Red Dragon. You know that.”

“Then it would be unwise to leave. You have a loyal customer base at Red Dragon. All very rich, and”—his smile grows sharp—“very polite.”

Polite. An interesting word. It actually means: None of them will ever proposition or harass you because they know they'll be maimed if they do. An easy thought to use to your advantage.

“It's loyal but it's small. Everyone who's anyone in this part of town thinks that we’re married. Do you know how hard it is to pull new customers in when they're scared shitless of my yakuza husband? And anyway”—you frown, trying to look as pathetic as possible—“I'm lonely.”

Suo stares. He looks surprised, possibly because you absorb every minute of his free time with silly conversation, new restaurants, and skiing trips. (He likes snow, so you ask for these trips more for him to relax than anything else.) You also text him frequently on days he's working, and he very diligently replies, even if he's in the middle of something like a raid or a hit or brokering a massive deal. Suo still very strictly keeps to his rule of never touching his phone when in conversation with other people—unless he needs to text you.

So his suspicion is fair. Suo is very attentive and doesn't allow you much opportunity for loneliness. In turn, you’ve always been very happy spending time with him, even when it's only him.

“Lonely?” he repeats. “Are you, now?”

“Yes. You work so much,” you complain, which is not a lie, “and I don't have any friends to spend time with when you're gone.”

“You have friends from work.”

“No, I have competition at work. The hostesses are so cutthroat about rankings, they hate me. And each other.”

“You like Shuuhei and Hanzo,” he points out, referring to his men who most frequently chauffeur you.

“Yeah, they're friendly, and they're very funny. I like them, but I can't be their friend.” Suo stares at you, nonplussed, so you spell it out: “They're too scared of you to get close to me. What if it looks like they're trying to fuck the boss’ wife?”

“Hm…” Suo studies you, looking thoughtful. Perhaps for the first time, he's contemplating the consequences of restricting your freedoms and marking you as his. That is to say—maybe he's finally realising that you have no friends and no life.

The beads of his earrings glimmer as he tilts his head at you and frowns. Suo almost looks innocent with that confused face of his. “And how would working on Keisei Street help?” he asks.

“Because all our old friends are there!” you exclaim. “Sakura’s in Roppo-Ichiza now so he’ll definitely be coming by all the clubs. Tsubaki too. And Nirei and Kiryu visit them quite often—and even Tsugeura does sometimes, even though clubbing isn't one of his virtues.” You grab onto his arm, pull yourself close, and give him your most disarming, pleading expression. “Please, Suo?”

“Hm.” He strokes your cheek and looks at you fondly, in the way that one would do with an adorable and slightly annoying kitten. “I don’t think so. It’s not very safe there.”

He isn't wrong. Not only are you untouchable on his turf because of your association to him, Suo has also just crushed all the han-gure and petty criminals in his territory with brutal efficiency. His part of the red light district is, quite ironically, one of the safest places in the city, and certainly safer than Keisei Street.

But undeterred, you point out, “Shuuhei and Hanzo can still drive me there and back if you want. But I don't think it's necessary. Do you really think Sakura would let anything happen to me?”

This is the true brilliance of your plan: capitalising on the fact that Suo is as nearly as weird about Sakura as he is about you. He pauses as soon as you bring up the point, and you can practically see the gears turning. “Well, if it's him…”

“I even texted him about it. Look—here!” You whip out your phone, receipts ready. The corner of Suo's mouth lifts at your obviously rehearsed pitch. “He says he'd make sure I'm taken care of. And he says it'd be nice because he misses seeing us. Can you believe it—Sakura actually admitted that he misses us! Typed it with his own two hands and pressed send! I bet he was super embarrassed about it.”

“Huh. He even used a sticker. I've never seen him do that.” Suo smiles as he reads through the chat. He looks like his old self. You suddenly feel a little wistful, and also a lot bad. This started as a ploy to get laid, but it’s made you realise that you really do miss your friends—and Suo probably does too.

“If I worked on Keisei Street, then you would have plenty of reason to visit,” you point out, feeling somewhat tender.

“I guess that's true,” Suo says. Your heart aches a little bit at the look he gives you. It's a platonic ache, of course. Or at the very least, it isn't an erotic one. It doesn't really make you want to have sex with him anyway. But if you could lean forward and press your lips to his—platonically—then you definitely would.

Suo's civilian friendships are complicated by his double life. Quite unusually for yakuza, Suo’s syndicate insists on using pseudonyms and false histories to avoid anti-yakuza laws, on the off-chance that the police decide to do their jobs and actually enforce those laws someday. Lying for comedy is one of Suo’s greatest passions, so he was happy to manufacture an absurd backstory: his name is Yanzhao, and he learned kung fu in a Shaolin Temple before moving to Hong Kong and working for the triads. He wears the eyepatch because he lost his eye in an altercation with the cops, which he won. By the way, you're his criminally beautiful wife who he met in Macau. The two of you had to leave for Japan since he killed a police officer and now he's wanted by the governments of both China and Hong Kong. Also, he's a very devoted husband, so if anyone lays a hand on you, he’ll kill them too.

Somehow, everyone has bought into this story. Every criminal organisation in the red light district now fears a high-ranking yakuza known as Yanzhao, who is easily recognizable by his eyepatch and tassel earrings, and who is also homicidally obsessed with his beautiful wife.

In some ways, his infamy is convenient. No one wants to fuck with Suo, or with you by extension. But it also poses some issues: Suo has to keep a low profile in areas controlled by rival organisations, or else he might be ambushed. It also means he cannot easily go out and see his old friends. Even though he always masquerades as a civvie when he does, wearing stud earrings and a glass eye, it's still a little risky—especially since he likes to visit the strongest member of Roppo-Ichiza. While Roppo-Ichiza aren’t yakuza, they're still han-gure, so some of its more criminally entangled members might recognize him anyway.

But Sakura himself, bless him, has not put two and two together and figured out that Suo Hayato and Gui Yanzhao are the same person. This is partly because Suo lies very convincingly about his fictional career in the tea industry, but you think it's also because Sakura is so gullible it's endearing.

I use the glass eye now because it's better for networking, Suo had explained before Sakura could interrogate him too much, his voice too smooth and too quick for the other man to get in a word edgewise. My business partners find the eyepatch too silly. The tassel earrings too. By the way, would you like some Baimudan tea? I thought of you when I smelled it—I know you like fragrant things—so I picked some up for you on my last visit to China. I was there for business a couple of weeks ago.

He, of course, neglected to mention that said business involved meeting with the 14K triad.

Despite the enormity of Suo's omission (lie), Sakura is none the wiser whenever he meets with you. He thinks you're just a regular hostess who has freedom of movement and various other human rights, and that Suo’s just a regular guy who isn’t homicidally obsessed with you (a detail of Suo's fabricated life story that is unfortunately grounded in reality). All this to say, Sakura doesn't think twice about mentioning the fact that you have a routine of going to love hotels after work.

Suo, as always, remains calm in the face of unsettling information. He sets down his tea (just tea, without shochu), and politely says, “Pardon?” He's once again using the nonchalant kind of tone that suggests mortal danger.

“She's always going to love hotels after her shifts.” Sakura is frowning at you, pink but scowling. “I thought you said you were done with that stuff. You promised us you wouldn't do it anymore. Suo—are you really okay with this?”

On the one hand, you find it exceptionally sweet that Sakura, after all this time, remembers your promise and wishes to hold you to it. He was so worried about you when you started having those nervous breakdowns as a teenager, and he probably still is. On the other hand, you're shitting bricks at the fact that Suo is now aware of your activities. Because sure, he likely won't fuck with Keisei Street—but you realise, as he stares at you, that you can't be certain of this. After all, your fake yakuza husband has very real homicidal urges.

“Um,” you say. “It's just business.”

“Business,” Suo repeats.

“You don't have to do that stuff to keep good business,” Sakura grouses, unaware of Suo’s carefully suppressed rage. “You're real popular already.”

“Are you?” Suo asks, looking right at you.

“I mean—I told you the pay would be better, right?” you reply, voice oddly high and nervous, and this is when Sakura notices that something is wrong.

“Oh,” Sakura says, looking between the two of you. “Suo, you didn't know?”

“I didn't,” he says. “Actually, she told me specifically that she wasn't going to do that if she worked here.” He turns to you, still smiling. “That's the only reason why I allowed this at all, remember?”

A chill travels down your spine. You did, in fact, commit to a perpetually sexless lifestyle in order to be granted some semblance of freedom: Of course I won't sleep with any customers, you'd said. You know I don't really like doing that anyway. I promise I'll behave! I’ll be out of the clubs and right back home. Sakura said he’d make sure I’ll get to a cab safely after the bar closes and everything!

“Um,” you say again, but this time you have no follow-up.

“Wait,” Sakura demands, “what do you mean by ‘allowed her’? What, do you need to give her permission to work now or something?”

Suo smiles disarmingly at Sakura. Without missing a beat, he says, “Generally no. But we’re dating now, which complicates what she’s allowed to do with other men at her job.”

Sakura spits out his drink. You choke on your spit.

“I… um?!” Sakura’s staring at you, so you quickly recover. This is a mortifying lie, but it's better than Sakura finding out just how batshit Suo has become since his school days. “I thought we were going to keep that a secret, dear?”

“Ah, you're right. Sorry, I got too excited.” Suo gives you an endeared look before turning to Sakura. “We were going to keep it to ourselves unless we got serious about it. But we've been talking about marriage lately, so I thought it was fine to mention.”

“...”

You’re going to have an aneurysm. Why does every cover that Suo comes up with involve a marital relationship between the two of you?!

“Oh… holy shit.” Sakura’s expression is complicated—somehow, more complicated than yours, even though you’re the one getting cornered into a fake engagement. It's unbelievable how shy he still is about this kind of thing. Maybe it’s just particularly embarrassing since he's known you two for so long, you reason. Regardless, he remembers his social cues enough to say, “Congrats, guys. That's great. That's really great.”

Suo gazes fondly at you across the table. “We were thinking you could be our best man,” he adds, and you consider violently kicking his leg.

“O-oh. Uh, yeah! Sure! But what about Nirei?”

“Rather than having a maid of honour,” you say reflexively, used to lying through your teeth for Suo, “we’d like him to be our best man as well.”

“Oh. That makes sense.” Thrown off guard, Sakura completely forgets about the love hotel business. He whips out his phone. “When were you thinking of having your wedding? I'll put it in my calendar.”

“I’m not sure.” Suo turns to you. “What were we thinking again, dear?”

You're going to die. You're going to die and it's a good thing because if you survive this embarrassment, your future will be bleak. As soon as Nirei finds out about this, he’ll want to start helping you with wedding planning, and then it would just be too awkward to cancel things. You’ll have to enter a fake marriage with Suo, which will be completely sexless, because even with a vow of everlasting love, there are still too many concrete and materially consequential reasons for not sleeping with him.

Condemning yourself to a lifetime of sexual frustration, you reply, “I think we were talking about a summer wedding.”

The drive home is awkward.

Hanzo and Shuuhei pick the two of you up. Suo mentioned that he wanted to talk to you and you alone, so they bring the Rolls Royce with the privacy suite. The two of them are entirely cut off from you thanks to the soundproofing, which traps you with Suo, who’s drinking a bottle of oolong tea as the two of you sit in complete silence. You think he's waiting for you to squirm—which you do.

You stay like that for five, agonising minutes before Suo finally says, “So you're sleeping with your customers.”

You swallow. “Yes.”

“For business?”

“Yes.”

“How much do you make?”

You blink. “Huh?”

“How much do you get paid for a single night of work, including gifts that your customers give you in exchange for sleeping with them?”

You're halfway through citing your earnings when you realise where he's going with this.

“So you make less than you did at Red Dragon,” Suo concludes, “and you're very smart with your money, so I know you know that, and you probably went into this knowing that you'd end up at a net loss.” He turns to you, gives you a look so sharp that it almost scares you. All made worse by his civilian disguise, which makes him feel unfamiliar. His glass eye shines strangely in the light, and his scar tissue is hidden by the makeup you helped apply. You wish he'd taken it all off before having this conversation.

“So,” he says, “what’s the real reason you changed jobs?”

Already knowing that he’ll figure you out sooner or later, you admit, “I just wanted to start having sex again.”

Suo blinks. “You… what?”

“I wanted to have sex with people,” you repeat. “I hadn't been touched for nearly two years, okay? I needed to get laid or else I'd go insane.” You cross your arms and look away, suddenly feeling petulant. “I'm sure you've noticed that our arrangement makes it impossible for me to see people.”

He doesn't answer, because of course he's noticed. He’d designed his house rules with precisely this intent. If he accompanies you everywhere you go, then you can't exactly go on dates, and you definitely can't meet people for sex. Not unless you feel like having Suo watch as some anonymous guy fucks you, and you don't. As hot as the idea is, it’s definitely not platonic behaviour, and it would probably trigger the whole homicidal obsession thing.

“Do you like it?” Suo asks, startling you. You look at him, confused.

“What?”

“Do you enjoy having sex with your customers?” he asks. His voice and gaze are even. Unrelenting. “Does it make you happy?”

You stare at him, a deer caught in headlights. You didn't expect Suo to actually care about whether you enjoyed it or not, and you didn't really expect to care yourself either. But truthfully, you hated it. You simply weren't feeling it with most of your customers and avoided intercourse with all but one. Then in that one case you let someone earnestly fuck you, it was a complete letdown. Possibly the worst sex you'd ever had. You spent the whole time watching the clock, wondering how long it would take, and it turned out that your hookup had remarkable stamina but absolutely no technique. To pass the time, and in an attempt to feel something, you tried to imagine it was someone else who was inside you. You cycled through a whole list of people, including all of your exes, a few of your past customers, every single member of BTS, and then—finally, inevitably—your long-time friend, roommate, and landlord.

To your complete horror, when you imagined that it was Suo who had you folded in half, his cock so deep inside you that you could feel it in your throat, you came so hard that you drenched the sheets.

You lay there afterward as your customer showered, alone in the bed. Normally you'd be getting dressed at that point, but you were too distracted. You kept thinking about what it would feel like to be held by Suo after having your guts rearranged by him—embraced tenderly like you know he would do with you, kissing him platonically like you've always wanted to do with him—and you realised that you didn’t actually want to have sex with anyone else. Despite all your life experience, sexual experience, and job experience—in that moment, you felt like a lonely nineteen year old girl who wanted nothing more than to have romantic, vanilla sex with her best friend, but who was instead having impersonal, disappointing sex with various salarymen.

This was a feeling so disgusting that you’ve decided to never tell anyone at any cost.

“Yeah, it's fine. I guess I like it.” You pretend to study your nails. “Sometimes I cum, which is all I really want.”

Suo keeps staring at you. “That’s it?” he asks, voice measured and careful. You raise a brow, playing dumb.

“What do you mean?”

“That's all you want? Just to get off?”

You gaze out the window, trying not to look at his lips.

“Yes, that's all.”

No matter how batshit Suo gets, he always maintains a certain kindness and maturity in how he handles conflict with you. It's a lesson that he learned from his master, which has perhaps been distorted over time, but remains important to him nevertheless.

If you do something upsetting, Suo is never forceful about getting you to act differently. Sure, he has fucked up ways of either getting you to behave or making you understand the consequences of your actions, and perhaps he has his manipulative moments. It was probably not a good thing that he coaxed you into indefinite house arrest, for instance. But he never threatens you, and he never hits you, and he never disrespects you. In fact, more than anything, he makes it a point to never let you feel like you aren't loved.

So when Suo abandons you after that conversation in the Rolls Royce, you lose your fucking mind.

Suo doesn’t come home in the days following that evening, without any note nor explanation. For the first time in years, he stops replying to your texts. Your immediate thought is that he's been gravely injured or perhaps even killed, which sends you into a panicked spiral. But every one of his men who's come by to check on you has implied otherwise—but I'm not allowed to tell you anything else, anesan, I’m sorry, they all say. And when you realise that Suo is actually fine and he's just playing a fucked up mind game with you, one that makes you feel distinctly unloved, you feel simultaneously heartbroken and apoplectic. The man is not allowed to corner you into de facto imprisonment and then just fucking leave. In fact, if he tries, you might imprison him.

You spend a few days sitting at home and crying over this, as well as torturing yourself by thinking about useless things (fear of rejection, fear of abandonment, et cetera). But eventually, you get tired of wallowing in self-inflicted misery, and you decide to just track your fake husband down. His men have been adamant about not letting you out of their sight—presumably so you don’t fuck any more of your customers, because Suo can be spiteful like that—so you have to be strategic about your plan to find him.

You decide to do it during work. You tap out in the middle of a shift, feigning illness, so nobody bats an eye when you put on the most shapeless hoodie you own and throw on a face mask. Your chauffeurs (handlers) don't notice as you sneak off—and for the first time in years, you walk through the red light district all alone.

It feels strange not to be protected, and even stranger not to be surveilled. You marvel at the unfamiliar experience of complete freedom, and at the possibility of being able to run off and disappear if you so wished. But you don't, of course. Not only do you care too deeply for Suo to abandon him, you're also pretty sure he has your driver’s licence and ID card locked up somewhere. At least you haven't been able to find them, and Suo was oddly evasive about it when you asked. (I haven't seen them, he'd said, but I don't think you’d need either of those things immediately, anyway, do you? And you nodded in response, because it was true that you liked being his passenger princess too much to care about your licence.)

So rather than bolting for the subway, you head straight to your old workplace. The gleaming doors of Red Dragon welcome you as you cross its threshold, and you're greeted immediately by the scent of luxury colognes and expensive cigars—both evoking a strange nostalgia in you. Even the click of your heels against the marble floor feels familiar. You realise that you've missed the place despite its cutthroat culture and its owner’s authoritarian control over you, which you suppose isn't surprising. This club was more or less your home for years and, thanks to said owner, was the safest place you've ever worked.

And being that you feel you've returned to your very safe home, you don't expect it when you're abruptly stopped by the bouncer.

“Can I help you?” he asks, his arm in your way. You don't recognize him, but you see the edges of his irezumi peeking out from the rolled-up cuffs of his shirt.

“Yeah, actually,” you say. “I'm looking for Gui Yanzhao. Is he here right now?”

The bouncer—or chinpira, you guess—bristles.

“You're looking for who?”

“Yanzhao?” you say impatiently. “Eyepatch, tassel earrings? Owner of the club? Probably your boss?”

The bouncer steps forward and reaches for something in his pocket, which makes you suddenly nervous, and also makes you realise that in a hoodie and a face mask, you ordinarily wouldn't be allowed in this club, let alone into the room of its yakuza owner. You're so used to VIP treatment here that you simply forgot.

You take a step back. “Um. I think there's been a misunderstanding.” You lower your face mask, which doesn't help as you've never met this man, and he must be new. You’ll need to complain to Suo about his onboarding process later, if you aren't killed before you can find him.

It turns out that this yakuza rookie has a knife in his pocket, which is not the worst thing he could have been carrying, but is also not the best. You're getting ready to run in the other direction when a more senior member of the gang comes by. He gives you a startled look, which then turns alarmed when he sees his younger brother’s knife.

“Anesan!” he yells hurriedly, and he snatches the chinpira’s knife straight from his hand. His lunge for the weapon turns into a hurried bow. He pulls his colleague—whose face has turned very white in a very short amount of time—into an even deeper one. They look on the verge of prostrating.

“Oh, Yamashita. Hi! Is this guy new?”

“Yes! My sincerest apologies for my younger brother’s idiocy, and his insolence in raising a weapon at you.” There's a sheen of sweat on the back of his neck. “If you would like him to atone, then he would be more than happy to—”

“No, that's fine. I'd really like him to keep all his fingers.” If you have to see a rookie cut off his pinkie today, you think you might actually change your mind on running away. Fuck your documents—Suo can keep them. Surely life without proof of identity can't be that hard. “By the way,” you say, trying to change the topic before Yamashita can suggest alternative acts of atonement, “have you seen my husband?”

Yamashita hesitates at your question, looks conflicted. You feel a little bad for him, and for every other gang member who needs to worry about accidentally offending Suo. You watch him sweat for a full ten seconds before he says, “You can follow me. But anesan, you might find it unpleasant upstairs. I can find someone to drive you home instead, if you'd like.”

You give him a funny look. This was your workplace for a very long time—you can’t think of many things that would happen here that might seriously upset you. “What, is he cheating on me?” you guess.

“What? No! Aniki would never!” Yamashita seems genuinely shocked at the suggestion. “He's crazy about you!”

“Then I'm sure he’ll be happy to see me,” you say, although given that he's ignored your texts for four days straight, you aren't so sure. Regardless, this seems to be good enough reasoning for Yamashita, and you’re taken to the top floor of Red Dragon. You ponder the whole time, on the elevator ride up, just what exactly Suo’s been up to that's made Yamashita this nervous about letting you see him.

Then the door opens, and you’re given your answer in the form of several body bags—all cleanly zipped up and conscientiously laid out in front of the elevators in a single, neat row. A sight that is significantly worse than a rookie cutting off his pinkie finger.

“Oh,” you say faintly. You try not to throw up. “So this is why he hasn't been home.”

“Exactly!” Yamashita replies, beaming. “See, anesan, I told you. He'd never cheat on you!”

Suo is in the lounge of the top floor, which has been cleared of both civilians and corpses for the night. He's sitting on one of the couches, leaning back with his one eye closed, as if asleep. The golden tassels of his earrings are draped over the expensive leather of his seat, intertwined with his dark hair. A cup of tea sits in front of him, steaming. Even this far away, you recognize it by the scent alone: jasmine, probably from Longjing. One of the most expensive blends he has, and that which he saves for days he’s stressed, though he never admits it when he is.

The sight of him would almost look tranquil, except for all the blood on his knuckles and his cuffs.

Off to the side, two of his younger brothers are chatting away. One is pouring cups of some doubtlessly expensive liquor, and the other is smoking a cigar. There's karaage on the table too. You recognize all of this as part of a ritual that some of the guys like to do after a hit or a shootout, not dissimilar to getting ramen or McDonald’s after going to a club.

You catch a bit of their conversation as you approach. One of them holds up the liquor bottle (Isojiman sake, you now recognise from your girls’ bar days, one of the rarer bottles costing around nine million yen) and asks Suo if he wants to join. “No thanks,” he says predictably, “I'm on a diet.” Then he turns and looks right at you—startling you, because you had thought you were being fairly quiet—and gives you a smile so genuine that it reminds you of his Furin days. “Would my beautiful wife like to drink for me, though?”

“No thanks,” you reply, “but your beautiful wife would like to talk to you.”

The two guys clear out to give you some privacy. You’re left alone with Suo, feeling awkward after several days of resenting him for no reason. (You’d rather die than go to therapy, but the whole fear of abandonment thing is probably something you should start addressing.) You don't even know where you want to sit. Eventually, you settle for placing yourself next to him, which is a decision that Suo quickly overturns by pulling you into his lap.

A flutter erupts in your stomach as he settles you on top of him. This physiological reaction is absurd, as not even ten minutes ago, you were trying not to throw up at the line of corpses in front of the elevator. It should also scare you somewhat that Suo’s hands—delicately adjusting your body—are still covered in blood. But truthfully, you can't help but be happy when he makes you feel so loved.

You take one of the napkins on the table and start wiping at his knuckles. Tenderly, in case they're bruised or skinned.

“You didn't call or come home,” you start.

“I thought it would be too dangerous.”

You frown, thinking of all the bodies outside. “Was this a rival organisation?”

“No. They were ours.” He sighs. “A succession conflict. There are a few people who don't like how I'll run things if I take over.”

You nod. Suo is very old-fashioned in his ideals about the yakuza, which you think is an imprint of his master’s influence, and something that appeals to his current ‘father’. He values chivalry. He likes protecting the weak. His filial devotion to his deceased master has now extended to every member of his yakuza family, especially his oyassan. He’s almost certainly the top candidate for taking over after the oyabun dies, but being that part of his old-fashioned principles excludes lucrative projects such as sex trafficking, you suppose it’s natural that some people in his organisation would prefer him dead rather than in charge.

“You’ve never ghosted me during violent conflicts before though,” you say. “I was worried that something happened to you. Or that you were upset with me.”

Suo’s hand drops to your waist, pulling you a little closer.

“They knew where we live. They tried to get to you, you know.” Your eyes widen in alarm, so he cups your face with a palm. His thumb glides along your cheek, and your response is almost Pavlovian: your heart rate immediately slows at the comfort of his touch. “It’s fine. They won't bother you ever again.” The cheerful smile returns. “And if anyone else ever does, I'll handle them too.”

Your heart swells. Enthusiastic pledges of murder are not a healthy sign of affection, but after so much loneliness—whether from the past several days, or the years before that, you aren't sure—you can't find it in yourself to be disturbed. You feel and sound painfully fond when you reply, “I know.”

Suo’s expression dims a little then. “I thought you'd like the space anyway.”

“What?” You give him a confused look. You have never once given him any indication that you want even an inch of space from him. You'd crawl into his ribcage if you could. “Why would you think that?”

“I thought you felt suffocated. You left my club just so you could have sex with other people.” You blink, lingering on his wording. Other people. He continues before you can ask about it, sighing, “You didn't even ask me who I'd give permission to touch you. You just went ahead and decided on your own.”

“...”

You try not to look disturbed. Suo’s apparent wish to control your sexual decisions is news to you, and somehow more alarming than the murder pledge. And even worse—you immediately clench in response to his words. The thought of Suo dictating who does and doesn't get to touch your cunt is… well, your mind is heading in a distinctly non-platonic direction.

Trying to ignore the heat in between your thighs (but at the same time encouraging it), you ask: “Who would you have been, um, okay with touching me?”

“Sakura or Nirei,” he says immediately. “Though only Sakura would be interested.”

“What.” You gape at him, all arousal forgotten. “Bullshit. He would never.”

“Yes, he would.” Suo tilts his head. “Haven't you noticed?”

“I don't think there's anything to notice? And also—he’s so shy, I don't think he'd ever agree even if he were interested!” You give him a bewildered look. “He couldn't even look at us when we said we were getting married, he was so embarrassed!”

“Embarrassed?” Suo stares at you, an amused glint in his eye. “Is that what you thought was going on?”

“Was there anything else?”

He studies you for a moment, clearly entertained but not explaining why. “Well—it’s fine,” he says. “It doesn't matter for now. Especially since he's helping us plan a wedding and all.”

You make a face. “I still can't believe that's the cover you went for.”

“Are you upset with it?” he asks smoothly, and you huff and say yes, but from his sly look, you think he knows it's a lie.

Naturally, you deflect before he can further interrogate you. “So, given that you are now my fiancé, am I no longer allowed to work on Keisei Street and see customers after my shifts?”

You don’t expect it when Suo says, “No, you can.”

You stare. “What?”

“You can keep seeing customers if you'd like. You said it makes you happy, so why would I stop you?” Suo’s brow furrows, his usual calm replaced with concern. “Do you really think I do the things I do to make you miserable?”

Guilt gnaws at your heart. He looks so disappointed. “No,” you tell him. “I just thought it'd make you miserable that I was sleeping with people without your permission.” It is partly why you hid it from him in the first place, after all. You don't like to see him sad—you’re still haunted by the deep grief he was in, after your master died—and also, his misery tends to bring bodily harm to other people these days.

Cognizant of both concerns, you ask, “You’re really okay with me sleeping with my customers? I can stop, if you want.”

“No, it’s fine. I still don't like it, but you can continue for now if you want.”

Suo’s mouth curls—not in a gentle way, as has been his expression since seeing you walk in, but in a way that sets off your flight or fight response.

“I'm sure we’ll reach a mutual understanding soon enough.”

END PART 1

thank you genuinely if you read all that because this is a deranged au and I still can't believe I wrote it sldfkjsldfkj. please do let me know if you enjoyed my yandere suo delusions. sorry there was no smut in this chapter. I promise there is a ton in the next one (probably too much... lol. it's a 10k chapter and literally half of those words are about orgasm denial sldfkjalskdjdf). it's completely written and I hope to edit and have it up by next week!

also here is glossary of terms and world building notes if you are interested!

tagging @kweenkatsuki-fics !! <3

[hadesisqueer]

I’m here to be different from the trolls and actually ask you something interesting. Do you agree or disagree with Miguel and the canon events?

Oh boy. Alright.

I sympathize with Miguel, and I find him a very complex and interesting character who, even though he knows his methods are far from exactly right, genuinely thinks he's doing the right thing and everything for the greater good. But no, I don't exactly agree with him when it comes to the whole canon events thing.

I do think canon events are real to some degree, in the sense that they are things that the Spideys in different universes tend to experience. However, I do not think that they all have to happen and if they don't and things go differently then everything is broken and that dimension collapses. Mainly because the logic behind that is flawed.

Miguel explains that when he took over his dead counterpart's place, he broke canon. But what canon events did he even disrupt? He doesn't explain it. Unless his daughter was Spider-Woman there and his death was supposed to be her Uncle Ben moment, it doesn't seem like he actually broke any canon events at all. But his daughter was a little girl and she likely hadn't even been bitten yet, so it seems unlikely because it like the whole canon things happen after you're bitten. It doesn't make a lot of sense.

You can argue that Pavitr's dimension started unravelling after Miles breaking his canon event, but it doesn't make full sense, either. It seems like it took a while for his daughter's dimension to get destroyed after Miguel allegedly broke the canon, and Pavitr's starts immediately after? Right after the stunt the Spot, a multiversal threat with dimensional powers, pulled? Miles was right, it makes more sense to think that that was the Spot's fault than his.

Also, if according to Miguel, Miles should have never been Spider-Man and his whole existence goes against canon, how come his dimension hasn't been destroyed? How come Prowler Miles' dimension is still there if he wasn't bitten like he was 'supposed' to be? Absolutely no canon events have happened in Earth 42, and-- it's fine, no black holes? And why does Miles even have to experience canon events if according to Miguel he's an anomaly? Plus if we're being technical Peter Parker's Spider-Man already experienced those canon events, all that already happened to one of the Spider-Men in 1610, so why do they have to happen twice, now to the kid who again wasn't even supposed to be Spider-Man according to Miguel?

Even in Gwen's case. That's the most subtle yet clearest example of the fact that nothing really happens if canon is 'broken'. He quits and stops being captain. Which means that a canon event isn't going to happen now, because the police captain that was supposed to die was her father. And now he's not captain anymore. Did something happen? Did a horrible black hole open up and started swallowing everything the moment he said those words? No. Nothing happens. And Gwen realizes that, too. And that's when she fully confirms that the whole 'everyone has to experience these canon events by force or everything will go to shit' is actually a bunch of bullshit. Because canon was just technically changed, and everything was still fine.

Again, I think Miguel truly believes he's doing the right thing. But his logic is flawed and he's too blinded by his own grief and guilt to see that.

[imthepunchlord]

So one of the odd things that stands out to me is, nearly a 180 chapters in, in a manga where we get to see the backstories, families, and home life of various characters, from major to minor, we actually have yet to have anything on Momo and Okarun's history and family.

Particularly, on the topic of Momo's parents (my speculation on what may be going on with Okarun covered here).

For how much time we spend with Momo, at her home, and with Seiko, it's odd that we just have... nothing on her parents outside Momo confirming that they're gone.

I don't remember seeing any pictures on the wall.

There's no talk about them aside from Momo's confirmation about them.

There's no offered memories of them.

Just nothing, not from Momo or Seiko.

Which, I don't know how much it'll matter, but I'm so curious about Momo's parents, who were they and what happened.

And that curiosity led me to a speculation.

I theorize that one or both of Momo's parents were mediums, with Seiko's child following in her footsteps. And they wound up coming across/upsetting a very dangerous yokai that proceeded to take them out, and only little Momo survived because she manifested her spiritual power and fought back or took it out.

And that's how Seiko found Momo when she rushed over to help her family, power awakened, yokai defeated or chased off. And those powers receded once Momo was safe, and with it, the horrible memory is blocked or forgotten.

For now, I feel it's a plausible theory for the fate of Momo's parents, as I feel it can work off what we see of Seiko.

Seiko does know about Momo's power and was surprised by how limited Momo was, as if she was expecting more, which would make sense if she had seen more from Momo in the past.

And we do have Seiko teaching and preparing Momo for the spiritual world.

And Momo does have some knowledge about spirits and how to approach and work around them, which Seiko taught her.

In spite of this, we do have Seiko holding back from fully including Momo. Through the sass and squabbles, she cares greatly for Momo's safety.

Like Seiko holding onto what Momo said as an angry kid for so long, either Seiko is just that petty, or she's using it as a means to put distance between Momo and the spiritual world out there.

And in the latest chapters, despite Momo's situation, Seiko is adamant for Momo to go to school.

And we learn that, while Momo is at school (and safe to Seiko's knowledge), she's looking into how to turn Momo back to normalcy without Momo's knowledge.

If Momo knew that Seiko was going to do this, she would've joined her in an instant.

So I think chances are good that Seiko experienced great loss of her child through spirits/yokai, and got to witness the power Momo has. She does what she can to teach and prepare Momo, but is also trying to keep her safe and have some distance from the spiritual world.

And what makes the most sense to me is the possibility that Momo's parents fell to some powerful yokai, that activated Momo's powers for the first time for Seiko to see.

[eurydicees]

re what they are saying about fiyero on twitter - gosh there is too much stuff. they talk about how uninteresting he is, how his presence has no effect on the leads, how he shouldn’t be elphaba’s endgame and doesnt deserve to be, how they want to delete him from the plot (somewhere along those line), how they want to block anyone making any fiyeraba or fiyero tweets or content and much, much, MUCH more like i genuinely do not understand the obsession?

i of course get not liking him, thats normal about any character lol but the way they just cannot shut up about how they dislike him is so….. like really no one is challenging your gelphie content 😭 we really are not interested to challenge your ship. you really dont need to focus on this guy 24/7 but ig you do you i hope they remain sane amidst all the apparent misery lol

well. you know. disappointed by not surprised. a partial fiyero ted talk under the cut. sorry.

it's like. it's just so frustrating to write him off as uninteresting and as having no effect on either elphaba (or glinda). like guys why is the media literacy not happening right now. also how the fuck would you delete him from the plot???? guys his plan is literally how elphaba escapes dorothy. he's the one who saves her from the gale force, TWICE. he literally sacrifices himself for her escape and its his sacrifice that makes her spiral into "wickedness" during no good deed.

also, fiyero is elphaba's endgame in part because he does what glinda cannot bring herself to do. WHICH IS SO VITAL TO THE ENDING. fiyero is the one who makes all of the sacrifices for elphaba that glinda refused, and he both pays the price for it and reaps the reward of it.

glinda and elphaba have a profound effect on each other, obviously, but it's not like fiyero is left unchanged by elphaba. i dont get where this idea that fiyero and elphaba have no dynamic because like??? that's just not true?????

fiyero goes from refusing to confront the difficulties of life to choosing the more difficult path for the sake of morality and loyalty and love because of elphaba (which is also really interesting given how he's, like, kind of a casualty of war in the book more than he is an actual rebel....mostly fiyero's book to musical adapation is #Rough but that's a cool parallel i hadn't noticed before).

glinda begins to see the flaws in the wizard's society, but she actively chooses to be a part of the system anyway. and she regrets it. that's the whole thing abt thank goodness!!!

fiyero, on the other hand, begins to see the flaws in this society and he chooses elphaba--and the life of rebellion that she's chosen--over everything that glinda admits to being unable to resist.

and GOD. guys that's so interesting. HES SO INTERESTING!!! how are you not interested by all of this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

wicked is such a cool study on morality and what the "right" thing to do in such a world is, and what it means to make the decision to do the right thing vs the comfortable thing. fiyero chooses to follow elphaba and he pays the price, but he also doesn't regret it. glinda chooses the "safe" option--but in the end, even if she chooses good then, she's entirely alone in it all.

and that's SO INTERESTING!!!!!!!!! god. whatever. twitter just doesn't get him like you and me get him, anon.

just. it's totally fine to dislike him! i'm not refuting people's right to dislike him. the nature of fictional characters is that sometimes people will dislike them. like that's fine.

but being incapable of shutting up about how much you hate a character just...it stops being "harmlessly disliking a fictional character" and starts being "you are insufferable to talk to." like sorry you're so miserable about fiyeraba but i'm gonna be over here just having fun because that's what fandom is supposed to be about :)

(also, just a major issue with breaking this movie up into two films released a year apart is that any movie-only fans just don't get the point of fiyero's character. it's kind of devastating. ik not all of the people saying that stuff are movie-only but man. the people who are...im BEGGING you to give him a chance in part 2. literally BEGGING you. fiyero is such a good character. he has so many good moments. let the green girl go lives in my head rent free and if they cut that i'll riot.)

tldr; fiyero is SO neat and twitter is just full of cowards.

[sapphicslaylist]

STP: Thorn Scarring & Disability

I'm going to gently tap the fandom with a stick: scars are not just a simple cosmetic detail which can be ignored/removed "stylistically" or given to make characters "cool." They impact a person's daily life, confidence, and way of interacting with the world, and need to be handled with consideration. Therefore, as a disabled person with background in accessibility, I think it's my turn to cover this one.

Going to specifically address this with Thorn, but it applies to others as well (not just because she's the most blatant example, but also as she's a character who the fandom likes to "heal" by removing all traces of her scars. Going to address what this implicates below).

Some important details:

She is deliberately depicted with heavy wounds of a variety of different depths. It can be assumed that they have been accumulated and left open for a significant amount of time.

We know the ones along her hands are the deepest because of Narrator's remark wherein "[she] picks up the blade, slicing through what little skin remains" of her hands and wrists. It is very likely these are not only permanent, but also have the possibility of muting or eliminating tactile sensation in her fingers either temporarily or permanently. She would therefore interact differently with the world if written outside the context of cannon

Further mobility issues may result from the wounds along her limbs. Because scar tissue is less flexible than normal skin, this would further constrict movement.

Some of the shallower ones may heal, yes. But deeper scars typically fade, but not vanish entirely.

This inherently makes Thorn disabled, and removing her scars IS disability erasure.

And it isn't just about physical disability, either. Witch & Thorn deal with removing stigmatization surrounding feminine beauty, and removing that detail does also impede the body positivity which she carries for survivors. Scar victims, especially people with deep scars are often considered "ugly." This especially applies to women, who are expected to cover them up or face value judgements regarding their appearance. The game does the opposite, by placing her hands at forefront within the kiss scene. The reason the kiss is so important is because people who are "non-traditionally" beautiful are still worthy of love - something which Thorn struggles to accept with throughout her route.

Overall, I think that people need to understand that they're not merely a literary symbol. But even within that context, the message of Thorn's route is that you can't eliminate your past/go back to who you were before, and that's okay. Because even if scars fade, they aren't something we can simply pretend didn't happen. They remain a part of us throughout the rest of our life, but we don't need to keep bleeding in the present.

Anyways! I hope this explains it. And if anyone does want advice on how to write these out, you're welcome to ask me!

[hollowed-theory-hall]

what do you think is going on with the malfoy family tree? it kinda cracks me up how it’s basically just a trunk, like father and only child son all the way down and they *all* look very similar? it makes me wonder if one of their ancestors made a deal with like, an actual demon to functionally clone themselves forever…and a cursory google search tells me Lucious and Abraxas are demon-y names, although this naming scheme doesn’t quite fit for the entire trunk (i realize the answer is probably just jkr getting lazy/not wanting too many characters to account for but where’s the fun in that)

Hello 👋

I think what's going on with the Malfoy family tree is the same thing that's going on with the Potter family tree or the Weasley family tree — that is, JKR/whoever on Pottermore made them didn't bother writing any family tree in detail other than the Blacks (and even the Black family tree is flawed, but more on that later). It's not necessarily that JKR doesn't know what the tree actually looks like, she just never wrote it out where we can find it. This is the Malfoy family tree:

Looking at the tree, it has more Blacks on it than Malfoys. Hell, even among the Malfoys we are seeing, we're not only lacking the wives of all these Malfoys but potentially generations as well, since Armand Malfoy (unless the one on the tree is a second Armand, which is possible) is the name of the first Malfoy that arrived in England with the Normans in the 11th century. Just from looking at it, it's clear the tree is lacking and is not a full version of it.

And the Malfoy's aren't the only lacking family tree:

If we look at the "official" Potter family tree, not only are there many unnamed members and skipped generations, but we are missing some known members, such as, Charlus Potter, who married Dorea Black and is a cousin or brother of either Fleamont or Henry (we don't really know how old Charlus is and both are a possibility).

The "official" Weasley family tree is similarly lacking. Not only is Muriel on it as a Weasley although she is a Prewett, not a Weasley, and many Prewttes actually are present on this tree as if they are Weasleys. The familial relationships are clearly missing. We know Muriel is Molly's aunt and Ron's great-aunt ("Your Great-Aunt Muriel doesn’t agree" (DH)). We know Lancelot Prewett is Mureil's cousin ("For your information, Elphias, my cousin Lancelot was a Healer at St. Mungo’s at the time" (DH)). We know Uncle Billius is Arthur's brother. That both are sons of Septimus and Cederella and that they have more brothers (as implied at the wedding in DH). Similarly unmentioned is that Ignatius Prewett is married to Lucritia Black and that they are likely Molly's parents. None of this information is on this tree even though it's canon in the books and written there clear as day.

Because of this, I just assume that the trees we have are clearly not the full versions. (I actually have my own version of various family trees that I made based on quotes and book evidence + the bit of info we have from Pottermore and the above trees + some headcanons that I usually work with). Also, I'm pretty sure these above trees weren't made by JKR at all. They were illustrated by Jessica Roux who was a Pottermore artist and I don't know how much JKR gave her to work with. So, I take the various "official" family trees with a hefty grain of salt and take book quotes as evidence over them.

This skeptical approach includes the Black family tree JKR made which I believe has mistakes in it. Not only with the ages of Cygnus and Pollux, but it's missing members such as Araminta ("and Araminta Meliflua . . . cousin of my mother’s . . . tried to force through a Ministry Bill to make Muggle-hunting legal" (OotP)) who should be on it (as Sirius points to her on the family tapestry in the books) but she's nowhere to be seen in JKR's tree.

That being said, I don't think the full version of the Malfoy family tree is much different in the current generation. Like, I think Lucius, Draco, and Narcissa are the only Malfoys around when the books take place. But I believe there were more Malfoys in prior generations and they inter-married other pure-blood families much like any other pure-blood family.

I sort of headcanon that both Narcissa and Andromeda (and perhaps Bellatrix) had certain problems with fertility. I mean, both Andromeda and Narcissa seem to me to be characters who would've wanted more children if they could have them. Both place their families in very high regard, especially their children, so it seems, somewhat off to me they don't have at least 2 children each, you know? It seems oddly out of character from what we see of them. Since it's both of them, and they are sisters, a genetic issue with getting pregnant (or carrying a pregnancy to term) seems like a plausible explanation to me.

(I kind of also think Bellatrix has the same issue and that she and Rodolphus tried to have kids and couldn't. Even if you want to go with some of CC canon and have her have Delphini, it actually makes a lot of sense. Like, if she slept with Voldemort thinking she couldn't get pregnant and then did. idk, I find this hypothetical more interesting for them)

[burning-sol]

You know what? I realise why the Sinsmas episode is pissing me off so much, it's because it's juggling so many different ideas that it doesn't spend enough time committed to a single one. Let me just break it down the way I see it...

The first idea we're introduced to is one about Stolas' depression but then when he sits down with Blitz we're introduced to the idea of Stolas' poverty.

The previous ideas are what you think that the episode might focus on until you get hit with the Octavia B-Plot. Okay! A-Plot is about depression and poverty, B-Plot is about Stolas not being able to contact Octavia... (I might be using those terms incorrectly, but you get the idea,)

But THEN you get Sinsmas introduced which is about the idea of indulging in your sins, which is shown to be important to the audience because it's expressed in dialogue, right? Wait, no, it's about Stolas's depression/poverty, okay then....

But THEN you cut to the office and we get a Millie and Moxxie bonding scene, so you think, "wait, is there going to be another DIFFERENT plotline introduced into this episode about their relationship??" AND YOU GET MORE ABOUT SINSMAS, multiple shots about the holiday and the idea of indulging in your sins!! So wait, the idea of Sinsmas IS an individual idea from the depression/poverty point? Or isn't it??

Stolas sobs on the phone, there's a very obvious depression/poverty breakdown, but then we get MORE NEW SHIT introduced because it's about Stolas' cheating. And I understand that that's meant to tie into Octavia's B-plot, but there's a subtle difference between that and THIS that adds another layer of shit on top (elaborated on later).

Which, BTW, I just wanna point out how this idea is contradictory to the Sinsmas idea since CHEATING is about INDULGING in LUST - as is established in your PREVIOUS. IMPORTANT. SEASON ONE FINALE... So WHY would you make a character shame a sin that's meant to be in the process of being celebrated which confuses the Sinsmas idea and was also the CORE of the Stolitz will-they-won't-they before now?? If it was to trigger Stolas' breakdown you already HAD the poverty story beat, this is just needless and confusing redundancy??

So then we actually get to Octavia and we get a scene about the idea of Stolas and Octavia not being able to get in contact with each other - the B-Plot - and followed by her introspective song and the discovery of Stolas' pills. And now we suddenly feel like we're back to where we were MEANT to be, with the Octavia B-Plot taking a pause to cut back to the Depression A-Plot. This builds up tension as we naturally feel the two characters drawn together.

And theeeen it cuts to the I.M.Ps and I'm banging my head against the wall because you're like, "Oh! The Millie and Moxxie relationship idea! This is going to be about them!"

But then OH MY GOD a NEW idea is introduced about Blitz wanting a FAMILY WITH STOLAS. I want to shoot someone because the cheating was a set up for Blitz to fantasise about wanting a family??? Is this meant to be a parallel to episode 1??? Am I meant to feel like Blitz has developed as a character?? In an episode that has been about every character OTHER than Blitz???

And then it's meant to be likeee like about Millie's pregnancy because she wants to kill the family instead of leaving them be, but it's also about Moxxie's relationship with her, but it's ALSO about being "demon enough" (WHATEVER THAT IS, IT'S NEVER ELABORATED ON), but it's also ALSO about Sinsmas.

Okay! Okay, back to the REAL plot except- Wait, Octavia walked in??? Wait, so this plot is now about Blitz wanting a family and he's going to bond with Octavia?? No! NO because they don't have any emotional connection and so there is no reason for this scene to exist if either way Blitz was going to know where Stolas went and Octavia was going to end up there as well anyways.

And can you tell I'm tired of writing at this point? Cus I'm losing my mind. FINALLY the A-plot and B-plot that should have been the center of the episode all along gets a fuck ton of screentime and it's beautiful and it's the peak of the episode.

And theeen it's back to Millie and you think, "Okay, so a big part of the pregnancy plot is clearly meant to be about Millie and Moxxie's relationship based on all the scenes we've gotten between them! That means that Millie and Moxxie are going to have some sort of important dialogue-" And then she WALKS OUT on him and she has her emotional moment with her sister! Which isn't a bad thing but need I remind you she isn't even in the center a FULL LENGTH episode, she's from a SHORT... WHY would you NOT integrate Sallie into a proper episode if she's going to be key to a future INCREDIBLY important plotline??

The episode ends with Blitz and Stolas and the credits roll blah blah blah...

This post is basically expands on some of the points of my post about my first impressions, because I just wanted to give a run down of the structure properly so you can understand why this episode is making me feel like I'm losing it. And I get it, if you put in the effort you can get an idea of how all the ideas were meant to tie together... But it doesn't! It's badly written! It makes me want to rip my hair out!

Ideas are established and then sit there uncomfortably without resolutions to them! Like even the shit. That was meant to be the main shit. The poverty and depression stuff? NO conclusion. Stolas says, "you don't have to refer to me as your highness" I guess?? But like, nothing to show him settling in with everyone else in the celebration to show he's like. Poor? And okay with it? By partaking in the holiday of those that are meant to be "beneath" him? No mention of his medication???

Just!! Okay. To understand the way shit in the writing could have been better, let me list some ways you could change the episode to be more coherent or cut down on redundancy if my points have so far not landed.

Establish Sallie towards the BEGINNING of the episode and her dynamic with Millie, and show how that compares to her relationship with Moxxie, and show WHY she would call Sally instead of talking with Moxxie first. If you're going to make the episode about family btw, this would be the point where Millie could bring up HER family and how much she values them or something in order to establish that as being important. Also, use this to explore what Millie and Moxxie's feelings on having a baby WOULD be, so that if there's conflict there then you have more understanding of why Millie made the decision she did.

Use the actual environment in the background of the montage to show the passage of time instead of it suddenly being Sinsmas. Have demons setting up holiday decorations, in the stores put up discount signs about a "Sinsmas sale!" This makes the story flow more naturally, as well as adds characterisation and makes Stolas' depression more real as he's shown to be so absorbed in his own world he doesn't even realise it's the holiday until Blitz brings it up.

Octavia's phone and the device she listens to music on is the same (I checked S1E2 to confirm it), which causes a sloppy writing issue. Like. If the episode is meant to show Stella is controlling and it's not Octavia's choice not to get in contact with Stolas, then you need to explain why she hasn't called him despite having access to her phone when Stella isn't around. If it were me, I would have had Stella lock it in a drawer that Octavia picks the lock on so she can listen to her music. THEN you can keep the original scene, OR (this is what I would have done) have her check her phone logs so you can see not only how many times Stolas has called but how much time has passed. Maybe this could also be used as another reason to drive her towards the closet as she hides from Stella and Andrealphus. Maybe this could be used as an interesting metaphor about her desire to leave but she doesn't know what she's going to do once she picks the lock on the door... Like how she could call her Dad now that she has her phone but she doesn't know what she'll do when she does... Something like that.

DON'T have Blitz and Via meet up if they're not going to interact. That entire scene is fucking pointless as is and I hate it. Either dedicate a PROPER amount of time and dialogue into making Blitz want to and try to connect with Via, or have them not talk at all. Cut out the whole thing about Blitz wanting a family with Stolas honestly, it's just not well explored enough.

Again with the sloppy writing, the gang did NOT need to stumble into a room of weapons to have weapons. That's pointless. They're assassins, they've been established to bring a stash of weapons with them to fights before. I can think of something much funnier where Moxxie is surprised by Loona's transformation and there's a joke made about her being a noble steed and Moxxie pulls out a sword only for Millie to be like, "Why did you bring that?" And Moxxie says something about how it's a posh weapon cus that's his thing. OR you could have some badass impromptu weapons the gang makes from the ice or they use Sinsmas decorations scattered around. IDK.

Already made my point about Stolas and the poverty idea. Show him settling in with the others during the celebration and him opening up to the idea that he's no longer rich or well respected. The "you don't have to refer to me as your highness" would work if the text bothered to show his mental state properly, instead of him just looking depressed and like he kind of hates everyone there.

Have Blitz PLEASE react to Stolas' depression. Like. Acknowledge it. And share his feelings about it. AND GIVE STOLAS HIS MEDICATION FFS he clearly has clinical depression!! Blitz is sooo head empty in this episode, PLEASE give him more internal thoughts other than :) I'm holding my head in my hands.

And I'm so tired of writing at this point I'm going to stop it there but I hope that was thorough enough to get across my points. And if not then I guess that speaks to how loopy this episode made me that I can't even articulate myself 100% because dear god.

[transtrashpanda]

I really hate how much this fandom ignores Peter as being part of the group because he betrayed the Potters (and when they do include him he's treated like shit), so here are my favorite Peter hcs cause he's one of my fav characters and doesn't get enough attention!!

he's amazing at herbology and loves plants + him tutoring the others in it because he and James are the only ones who give a damn about it (James' mum adores gardening and he helped her a lot growing up)

he is a fiend for green clothes and wears green (sage greens particularly) c o n s t a n t l y

he had braces starting the summer after third and ending in early to mid fifth (he was lucky enough to not need headgear though)

James and Sirius affectionately called him "brace-face" and "tin-grin" during that time

he, James, and Marlene all grew up together and Euphemia's love for gardening got him started with his love of plants (he always takes time to talk to her about his new plants when they all go to the Potter's for the hols and she thinks it's just the sweetest)

probably smoked weed

ok he definitely smoked week

aroace but doesn't have the labels to properly describe it cause it's the 70s

doesn't quite understand gay people (or romance in general but he gets that slightly more) but if it makes his mates happy then it's cool by him!

he and James are the sole reasons Remus and Sirius regularly consume meals

has major anxiety but also a fuck it we ball mentality (one of my favs! it's so fun to play with how they mix for him!! highly recommend)

really fucking funny but doesn't talk much so no one outside of his friends know about his absolute wicked sense of humor

he either remembers every word of a conversation you had with six years ago or doesn't remember even talking to you two days ago. there is no in between and there is no way of telling which you'll get

he probably had a lazy, orange cat who ONLY liked him and Sirius

yum bagels

struggles with words but will randomly say the most eloquent, wise old man esque shit ever and then goes back to stuttering

reads books with Remus and Lily!!

wore green to a quiddich match against slytherin once and James and Sirius stole everything off his bed and hid it from him for a week (he just cuddled with Remus every night)

loves baking and cooking but is pants at it (he's getting better though!!)

can convincingly bark like a dog???

probably cried to Lily a couple times because 'why are his friends so fucking oblivious??'

makes fun of his friends unprovoked, constantly

literal god at chess (only time he loses is when he pretends to while teaching underclassmen)

insanely good at photography!!

asfhgfsfdaaa

I love him sm and have so many more so if you're interested don't be afraid to send an ask :)

[plurapony]

Introjects. Let's Talk.

There are SO many assumptions based on introjects. It seems many believe that in order to have an introject of a character you must know absolutely everything about the character, you must be going through horrific trauma, introjects must be one to one of the character and that is extremely rare to have introjects in the first place.

All of these assumptions are (obviously) BALONEY!

Splits are caused by ANY stress/trauma. They are negatively induced but they also can be for very mild reasons, it all comes down to YOUR brain and whether you have a low or high split tolerance. It simply happens whenever there is a problem your brain needs to fix and none of your parts/alters would fit to role required, your brain will then create a new one! And sometimes it happens to take inspiration from someone that already exists either in fiction or the real world - it's really not that revolutionary, quite simple actually. And I have a hypothesis that autistic people have a higher rate of introjects due to inability to conceptualize but unfortunately no research has been done as of yet so.

For this particular post I want to introduce you to three of our parts. Adrian (he/she), Ash (they/he/she) and Kaya (she/her). All three of these parts are introjects that are based purely on perception rather than what is canon!

Adrian is an introject of the character Rookie from Club Penguin. As we never ventured into the lore of the penguins in the game, our brain made assumptions based on appearance. Adrian's main role in the system is to be silly and lighthearted - to just be unapologetically himself.

Ash is an introject of the character Ashley Graves from The Coffin of Andrew and Leyley. This is a game we have never played and know very little about! However it is a game our wife enjoys and we had seen the image of Ashley a lot. During the time Ash split we were feeling a lot of pressure to be good, to be sober, to work full-time and Ash split to rise against that and remove some of the overwhelming emotions we were experiencing. Our brain again made assumptions based on the characters appearance and that was what worked for us!

Kaya is an introject of the character Kayo Majiba from Machimaho: I Messed up and Made the Wrong Girl into a Magical Girl! We've never read the manga she is from and have only seen some panels, but apparently that was enough for our brain! Still relatively new compared to the other two but we believe she exists to be a pure ball of rage that just wants the world to burn.

INTROJECTS ARE SO NUANCED! They can be exactly like the character they are sourced from, they can be nothing like the character they are sourced from! You can have watched every single piece of media of their source, or watched none at all! There shouldn't be such in the box assumptions made about a category that is so wide!!!

And to everyone out there that has introjects that don't act like the pre-existing character/person they have introjected from, have introjects of a character from a media you have never partaken in, or anything else that goes against the norm of what is assumed about introjects - please never forget your validity. Someone else's misconceptions about how the disorder works will never be a valid reason for fakeclaiming.

Introjects in general! Your existence shouldn't be questioned based on dumb presumptuous opinions online!

[katsdrawlike]

There are many ways this could go around and none of them are good for her character.

There is the chance that Millie doesn't keep the baby; we have a skipable episode dedicated to it and then the pregnancy is never mentioned again.

Sadly, any type of development the poor woman has never ends up sticking with her so it is not so farfetched to think this will also be the case. The only way I can see the writers extending on it is if a) they drag Millie's final decision through several episodes or b) They add more melodrama by having Millie not tell Moxxie about the pregnancy and "handling it" by herself.

I don't really have to explain how keeping your partner in the dark about something like that could be very detrimental for a relationship. It would be so f*cking sad to see the "stable" couple face a crisis like that but I would not shelve it yet considering the writing.

There is also the chance that Millie has the baby and becomes a mother; however, considering Viv's track record when it comes to writing mothers... it doesn't look good either.

Let's take a look at the mother characters Viv has written, shall we?

a) The martyr (Blitz and Moxxie's mothers): We know nothing about them except their painful deaths and how terrible their husbands were. Apart from that, everything about them is a mystery.

b) The B*tch (Stella and Lilith): The jackass whose abusive nature or lack of care for her kids only serves to show how much better a parent the father is. Completely irredimable and if you like her, you are a terrible person.

c) The ignored (Millie's mother): Only shown in one episode, we don't know her name or the relationship she has with her kids, only that she is there.

No matter what direction they take... Millies is screwed

Ranting about Millie's pregnancy

The whole "justify the cheating because they're gay" critique is debatable, since it's not exactly confirmed if the ex-boyfriend did cheat. But the "Millie getting pregnant because Vivienne doesn't know what to do her character" critique is pretty valid.

The so-called hints throughout the season that supposedly show that Millie could be pregnant can just be easily interpreted as "Millie just being Millie", it's just her nature to be THAT mad, or THAT wholesome, or whatever. Not in any way shape or form was there any foreshadowing of this twist.

Not only is it such a lazy twist because of the lack of foreshadowing beforehand (please prove me wrong if there actually is), it also shows that Vivienne doesn't understand what made Ghostfuckers such a good episode for Millie.

Brandon Rogers while writing that episode knew that he didn't need to pull such a lazy narrative decision for one of the most underused main characters in the show just so critics could shut the fuck up. No, instead he understood that what Millie simply needed more screentime. Easy peezy lemon squeezy, just flesh out her character, show us her backstory a little bit, make sure she serves an important part of the episode and isn't just "Moxxie's wife." all the time, that she is really one of the most important people in Blitzo's life.

Brandon knew all he needed to do for Millie in that episode was make her matter, simple. Vivienne doesn't understand that. She'd rather make one of the laziest and overused plot twists to the most underused main protagonist in the show just so us critics can shut the fuck up about Millie being done dirty all season, but that's exactly what Vivienne did anyway because of this.

No foreshadowing whatsoever. Lack of understanding of why Ghostfuckers was such a good episode for both the stars Blitz, Millie and I.M.P as a whole. Lazy as Garfield ahh twist for the most underused main protagonist in the entire show. Overall, boring, disappointing, lazy, and maybe even annoying. It's clear Vivienne pulled this out of her ass just to wrap a weak bandage around the wasted potential of Millie this season.

I might watch one or two episodes of Season 3, but I have zero faith in it being good, because Lord have mercy on Vivienne handling this lazyass plot point well.

Thanks for reading my rant on why I don't like what Vivienne did to one of my favorite characters in this dumb show. This is J levels of being done dirty, but hey, at least Liam Vickers is a much better writer than Viv anyway.

[cryinhell]

No one asked, but here's my updated top ten hellaverse ships (both canon and not)

10) Stella x Striker

What can I say? I love an evil couple. I think these two look pretty hot together, and it's interesting how Striker seems to respect Stella despite hating blue bloods. These two aren't canon, but I wouldn't mind if they were

9) RadioRose

Despite having mixed feelings on Alastor, I think these two are just so cute. Either as a couple or just queer platonic partners, I don't care. Rosie seems to be the only person to make Alastor genuinely smile, and she's the only one who can touch him. There's a special bond there I really like

8) Verosika Mayday x Wally Wackford

So this is the biggest crack ship on this list, but I think in theory, it's so cute. I really want Verosika to be happy, and Wally, despite being a bit of a scammer, is really sweet. I'm totally cool with Verosika ending up with Barbie as well, but I slightly prefer Wally. I wonder if they will have more interactions in future episodes.

7) Fizzmodeus

Is this controversial? Probably. I know Fizzarolli and Asmodeus are so loved in this fandom, so putting them at number 7 is awful...but they aren't my favorite. I do like them, and I think they're really cute! I just have ships I like more, but that doesn't take away how sweet these two can be. Sometimes obnoxiously sweet heh. So yeah, no disrespect to these two

6) M&M

So these two were at first kinda meh for me, but over time, I've grown to love them. They have a pretty healthy relationship, and I always hate when someone bothers Millie for marrying Moxxie or saying Moxxie isn't a good enough husband. These two clearly love and respect each other and clearly grow together with every episode.

5) Staticmoth

Like I said, I love an evil couple. Valentino is a monster, and Vox is deplorable. That doesn't stop me from loving them as a couple and thinking they are cute. I think they both should die, but also would be sad cause come on, they're cute together.

4) Cherrisnake

I love Sir Pentious, I love Cherri Bomb, so obviously, them together is a fun pair. I shipped these two before the show came out and was so excited to see Pen having a crush on Cherri. They kinda remind me of the early versions of M&M, but they need a lot more time. Cherri isn't ready to accept love, and Sir Pentious is well...in a different world. I can't wait to see these two develop and become an actual couple.

3) Adamsapple

So this and Lucilith could be here. Lucifer being happy is the main objective, and its Adamsapple is so fun. They clearly have a history, and there's a lot of feelings. If Adam comes back in season 2, I'd love to see this be fleshed out. I doubt they'd be a couple, but maybe friends? Who knows. I'm fine with this one not being canon, and just something fun in the fandom

2) Stolitz

Stoltiz is pretty important to me because it really got me involved in the fandom. I've been watching Helluva Boss since the beginning, but episode one of season two had me from casual watcher to actual fan. Blitzø is one of the characters I really relate to, and Stolas is just a really well written character. I love the development of these two and they are worth waiting for. I really gotta draw some fanart of them because they are everything

1) Huskerdust

Are you surprised? You must be new. These two are my everything and all time otp in the Hellaverse. I've talked so much about why I love them, and I will continue to do so until I can't any longer. Angel and Husk are not only my favorite characters individually, but their growing friendship and eventual relationship are just so ughhhh. I love these losers, and they will always be number one.

Thanks for reading my nonsense

Have a good one 💜💜

[qilingxiong]

四樓的天堂 | Heaven on the 4th Floor (2021)

One drama has crept into my life during the last days of 2024 to become my favourite one I've watched this year, and I barely know how to start talking about it. But let's give this a go anyways.

Heaven on the 4th Floor (四樓的天堂) is a Taiwanese drama starring Anthony Wong, Hsieh Ying-xuan, and Fandy Fan. I would call it mostly slice-of-life with some melodrama, as there's no strongly focused overarching plot. Rather, it follows a cast of characters and the struggles/hurdles in their lives they have to face, all of whom are helped/guided by the something all of them have in common— seeing a tuina masseuse named Tianyi (Anthony Wong).

I don't quite know how to describe the way this show develops, as everyone's arcs separate and overlap at different times, but I would say Heaven at its core is about healing. First and foremost about healing the relationship one has with their body and oneself, but also those with other people, with the past, and with the present-day world around someone. There's some interesting juxtaposition between the physical healing Tianyi can offer his clients, and the mental healing Hsieh Ying-xuan's psychologist character provides for her own, with a look at how one cannot do the work of the other. Some characters are recurring throughout the show, others you get to watch take a step forward in the span of one episode, but eventually, no one remains where they were at the beginning.

The character who has the most growth throughout all this, in my opinion, is Fandy Fan's Yuzhou, a young graffiti artist. It's by meeting Tianyi that he gradually manages to stop hiding from the past, but also start looking with hope toward a future, and find a way to be better in tune with himself, his body, and the art he creates.

Aside from healing, Heaven is also about loss, and how someone reckons with it. Past loss (the disappearance of one's loved ones, the yearning for something you never got to have), present/recent loss (the death of a family member, the ending of a relationship), and loss that inevitably lies ahead (the destruction of one's home and the fight to resist it, even if it's all in vain). Characters war with their grief and are forced to find ways to release and gradually accept it, and while my heart ached for different people at different points in time, it was beautiful to watch.

I cannot stress enough that with all this combined, Heaven is one of the most cathartic pieces of media I've ever seen. I cried an unexpected number of times, from the beginning of the show to the end, and it was never, ever in a bad way. The three leads especially did a truly incredible job bringing the viewer into their lives, taking them along for the emotional ride, and I wish all the actors had won awards for that (only one of them did, but she truly deserved it).

Production-wise, I also adore the quality of this show. It's somehow very soothing to watch, visually, and the accompanying soundtrack made me tear up several times. I had to shake myself out of a daze every time I took a break from watching; it both felt like I'd run a marathon, but also had been sitting still, head quiet, and had had someone tell me not to worry about anything else in the world for a while. (It also made me feel more physically present in my body. My shoulders haven't been un-tense in years, and I think thanks to Heaven I'm going to have to do something about that.)

In addition, this isn't the main focus of the show, but queerness is worked into it in wonderfully ordinary ways. There's more than one queer character and a trans character who show up in this, and one protagonist who is either heavily coded as or possibly explicitly aroace spectrum, depending on how much you read into it. Her arc ended up being one of my favourites; the show deals with her relationships lining up with aroace experiences in a way I haven't really seen onscreen before.

Overall, I'm absolutely going to rewatch Heaven in the future, when I feel that I need to return to that story. If you want a grounded, very character-driven show to get gently lost in for a while, this is it.

(Though admittedly, I know this drama definitely isn't going to be for everyone. It's a little bit sleepy-going, and not everyone is interested in or is braced to deal with the emotions of the story. Normally even I'm not, but here I am. However, if you're interested, here's the trailer for Heaven on the 4th Floor:

And I don't tend to do this, but I'm also going to toss out two tracks that sound how this show feels, to me: In My Breath Again from the soundtrack of After Yang, and 披星戴月的想你 by Accusefive. Sit with those for a while and see what you think, if it helps you decide whether to watch or not.)

Note: Unless you have Taiwanese Netflix, you're gonna have to jump on the pirate ship to find this show. However, as far as I'm aware there have never been English subtitles made for it on any site, so if you can't read the Traditional Chinese in the episode raws, then you may have to sit this one out for the time being.)

[autisticlalna]

hm.

ruby stream today was fun! but there was... some weird. and by weird i mean lore hints.

the one that came up a few times is that their armor has new names! their elytra is back to being Lightning Rod (Rue misplaced it for a while), but the sillier names its armor had, and Rue's work uniform, is now Past, Never, Present, and Future.

there was also a comment made about how she was using very specific colors to trim them with. Past, the helmet, is blue. Present, the pants, is purple. Future, the boots, are red. and Never is untrimmed on suggestion from chat, but was going to be either black or white.

sighs. opens Clocktower transcript.

Sapphire: It’s the… past. The future. The now… and the never. Four concepts of time! Just like the four directions. North, south, east, and west. You should know, don’t you.

once again: Cherruby's getting put in the time blender. that's been noted for a while now, but now that he's awake again we're getting more confirmation on it.

there was also a couple other things! Anathra showed Ruby and Doovid around Icekea's break room, and Ruby paid a lot of attention to the clock and compass on display for decoration purposes. especially the clock. normal Ruby behavior at this point tbh, but worth taking note of.

what isn't Ruby behavior is... whatever happened between them and Dr. Tube when they briefly showed up to stop Ruby and Doovid from clowning around in Acacia. first we get Ruby staring at them and saying they remind her of someone-- this could be the whole clone thing, but Ruby immediately in-character clocked them as being Tube, not Trog, and being mysterious about them reminding her of Trog would be weird considering they're both very aware of each other by now.

after fae leaves is when we get the part i don't know what to do with yet besides gesture at it.

Bye Tube! Much love! Ah... Never gonna say b- uh, got to say bye to my own Tube. Hm.

look. Cherruby has been weird ever since che got untubed. there's whatever happened with Endbyco on Avid's stream (link includes the convo abt Sapphire but not Endbyco being sus about "normal kingdom behavior"), there's whatever happened with cher and Yellow in Viking's episode, and now there's this entire interaction with Dr. Tube. Cherruby being weird is very "fork found in kitchen" at this point but, man, what is going on.

now im thinking about my original theory way at the start where Cherruby's mimicry is bleedover from other timelines where she was partnered up with other people. there's definitely some kind of timeline bleed with what's going on between her and Viking. this feels more advanced than that, though.

[sillyfudgemonkeys]

Avatar (Love Interest) Fight: Kavik, Rangi, Katara, Asami (and why Rangi would win)

Based off Kyoshist's video. (and I know I went a tad ham in a comment thread of my own on the video, but I wanted to clearly and fully and long winded-ly explain my thoughts here)

Basically I wanna analyze who is most likely to win in this fight, and I'mma be honest. It's probably Rangi. Like other fights there's a lot of factors and it could go a few ways. But not here, I really think it's Rangi.

I'm not being biased, I love my girl but I don't think she's infallible. But in terms of what she's up against vs what we know of her skills, she has the best chance of winning. (mostly going to talk about key big feats of Katara/Kavik/Asami and then explain in detail how Rangi is a hard counter for either their best feats)

But let's define the setting from the video. (heavy spoilers for Kyoshi novels, light and nonspecific spoilers for the Yangchen Novels as best as I could, and spoilers for ATLA/LoK show and comics if applicable):

Fighters: Kavik, Rangi, Katara, and Asami.

Setting: Ba Sing Se (Lower Ring) (note, showing a different picture than what was in the video, note it's very cramped)

Things that are NOT specified: What time of day is it? Is it a full moon? Does Asami have her glove? What version of the characters are we looking at? Do they know they have to fight? What's the weather?

The picture shown of Ba Sing Se in the video was day time. So we'll assume that, which means no full moon. But I will consider the effects of the fight if there IS a full moon at the very end of this post.

We'll assume Asami has her glove, like she usually does. We'll assume "peak" for the characters that we know of. So S3+!Katara, LoY!Kavik, SoK!Rangi (pre-stab), S4+!Asami.

As for if all 4 know they have to fight each other? I'm assuming yes, it'd be weird if only 1-3 knew but the others didn't.

What's the weather? Picture showed a normal day (aka no rain).

(I'm in the middle of re-reading the comics so I might be spotty on using that info, I apologize in advance if I missed something TT0TT I'm mostly focusing on the base shows/novels)

_______

Trouble for the Waterbenders:

Ok, already starting off and it's not looking the best for our Waterbenders. Unlike the Avatar+their love interest duo fight (which was next to the ocean iirc), the WBs don't have unlimited access to water. Be it big body of water, or even plants to take from, it's the lower ring so it's probs pretty desolate.

(note that I'm making after writing all this: going back through ATLA, we know there's at least one fountain in the lower ring I believe? I think that's where Zuko is residing, and upon looking into an ep of LoK I did see a flowing river in the city somewhere. So they do have some vats of water but maybe not as much as the middle/upper rings)

I don't think it'd be an insta win for them even if they did (I have evidence hold on! it's in the bending prowess section), but this really puts them at a severe disadvantage. And they need all the help they can get.

If it's the day time, then they also have less of an advantage compared to Rangi. Not by much imo, but it's something to note. Not going to make it my center of my argument, but it should be stated.

Ok so the WBs are lacking water. We'll assume they can find it, but it's most likely not as abundant as they'd like. Plus Katara and Kavik now have to fight over the resource.

In terms of the better waterbender? It's Katara. In terms of the better physical fighter (hand to hand) (and also probably physically stronger maybe a dirtier fighter?)? It's Kavik. Who gets control of the water? I'm....thinking Katara, but I think she'll have to work for it considering his strength.

(Something about strength between waterbenders (because I find it hard to measure the strength of chars sometimes esp with how some of the franchise feels inconsistent). We see Katara wield a tidal wave against the Southern Raiders, not as big as what Kuruk does with his Avatar state (or what Roku does in base against his master), but still. Then Kavik is able to hold a giant blob of water in the air with an adult woman in it, for a long period of time. All while Yangchen heals them. And is able to wield a giant amount of water (enough to douse a giant warehouse fire and fight back against opponents). So maybe strength with bending vs strength with muscles isn't always connected, but I'm not sure. It should be noted tho. Anyway!)

Both have the ability to utilize their own body's sweat as a weapon. Kavik has also used his own spit in combat.

But there is a big disadvantage to all of this. If they have to resort to using their own bodily fluids in a fight, they probably aren't lasting long (you need your bodily fluids to survive!). It's a last resort sort of thing, and/or used more in espionage than hand to hand.

Combine this with Rangi and Asami, a bender that always has access to their bending, and a nonbender who doesn't need to worry about it. Rangi and Asami can just go on the attack while the there two have to worry about their element as well as sharing it.

Hand to Hand fighting:

That's fine! They can always fight hand to hand! Except....Kavik and Katara may be at a bit of a disadvantage still...

Kavik's noted to not be the best fighter, but he wins what he needs (that being said, he is still a fairly strong and capable wrestler). He's great at using his strength to scare off enemies (see warehouse and giant arm plank thingy). He does seem able to handle non-benders fairly well, esp if he has water, and lots of it, at his disposal (again see warehouse fight).

Katara's a great fighter, but it's her bending alone that carries her, not hand to hand. Her hand to hand isn't as up there like a Kyoshi Warrior, or a FN academy student, or Asami and her self defense.

If it came down to hand to hand between those two, I think Kavik is gonna win.

BUT, compare either of them to Asami and Rangi?

Asami has taken the best self-defense classes since she was young. And she's kind of insane. TT0TT She's able to disarm a grown ass man and use his own weapon against him. She's nimble, fast, and can dodge punches fairly easily and wait until she gets an opening to either disarm or use her glove. But the craziest thing is her flying scissor kicking (probs not the right name for it) a fucking guy on a motorcycle and flipping him off before landing easily (she flips over a speeding motorcycle that's coming at her... twice!). She has the damn strength to pull a metal bar (that's screwed on, I think it's "shoddy" but still) out of the wall, and can knock a grown man out with a single karate chop to the back of the head. Like I don't think she needs the glove, the glove just makes her that more dangerous.

Even if Kavik (it's just a wrap for Katar tbh) can overpower her with his strength. He'd probs have to grapple her. But that's assuming he can get his damn hands on her (she's very slippery). And if he can't, even without the glove she could probably knock him out.

(I wanna say Asami knows chi blocking, but I have to keep reminding myself Equalist!Asami sadly does not exist. I don't think she knows chi blocking, but that could've REALLY helped her in this fight...siiiigh girl go learn it please TT0TT Crossed out this section to indicate it's a side thought that has no bearing on the rest of this piece, but it should be noted)

The only one who can give each other a run for their money in hand to hand is Asami vs Rangi.

Rangi's a fucking psycho in her own right. Army brat, graduated school at the top of her class, and completed her military training early (plus most likely trained by Hei-Ran, one of the best firebenders the world had to offer at the time). I know I love to fling the nepo baby allegations around with her, but she has quite a pedigree in her own right that she earned. She is stated to be proficient in many weapons on top of hand to hand. (god help anyone here if she grabs a sword)

She trained Kyoshi, and the Kyoshi Warriors' combat is heavily based on her own fighting style (KW, iirc, only lost to one enemy and it was FN Academy students, aka their cousin school you could say). Tbh I wouldn't be surprised if the Dai Li also had some of her moves too because of the training they got from Kyoshi.

Her greatest feat was taking on a grown ass, mountain of a man, who was roughly twice her size. And she fucking just.......man-handled him. TT0TT She easily toyed with that motherfucker. He may not have been an uber elite trained guy, but he was a brawler (a killer too).

Like if the guy did land a clean punch, it'd knock someone out (we know because it did to Rangi). "Oh so she lost" no. She let herself get knocked out (she was making a point to Kyoshi). She woke up just in time to not die, and to snap his leg like a twig from the ground she was laying on.

"So she can't tank heavy hits." Haha. Yeah she can. We know she can tank heavy hits because of her fight in SoK with Koulin. Her, Koulin, and their superpowered not-fire punches. (we'll come back to that in the bending part)

Rangi is strong, she can dodge, and she can easily use her opponents weight against them. Kavik can probably outpower her (TOTALLY off topic, but not: would love to see these two in a giant table flipping contest....I think we would all enjoy it...esp YC and Kyo...Listen Rangi is STRONG but I dunno how strong compared to Kavik TT0TT so we need this for "science" I mean.... yes for science *cough*), but he won't be able to utilize that strength. Even if he does, she most likely can and will throw it back at him. If he grapples her...well..unlike Asami, she has bending. I can see her doing what he did to a man with his spit (she's burning his eyes or she's gonna superheat a limb I just know it, he's dropping her if he touches her).

Now her against Asami? I don't know. It feels like they have a similar fight style. Using the force of the opponent against them, or dodge until the right time to strike. Physical strength, Rangi probably hits harder (see Koulin fight), but both are scary strong because remember Asami just....pulls a metal bar out of a wall and flings a grown man around with her legs while he speeds towards her on a vehicle jadsfjal;f (note: judging by body type, Rangi is probably more buff and/or ripped than Asami, Rangi's body type is more similar to Korra, though she is probs around the same height or taller than Asami).

Now it could go either way imo. Rangi has a few tricks up her sleeve, she can use firebending, and not only in a way that will burn Asami (see Koulin fight), just that it'll make her hits that much harder and faster and more nimble. But, if Asami can tap her with the glove? 🤔Hmmmmm..... So about the glove....

Only Firebenders can do lightning redirection. Not that Rangi knows that, buuuuuut she has to have some resistance to it because she's a firebender. It's how they can survive lightning going through them like that, they are literally bending it through their bodies which is why other benders can't do that, ergo they are probably more naturally resistant. (this resistance is probs one reason Kyoshi was able to survive all those hits besides just the armor and where she got hit, and how Zuko took one to the chest while only partially/barely redirecting it.... Aang was stuck in the sky and got hit in a really bad place all without redirecting and/or him ignoring his firebending side may have been what killed him. So it may not do a LOT of heavy lifting, but it's still better than not having it like a non-firebender would).

Lightning is just super powered electricity. That glove pumps out electricity..... BUT it's probably not pushing out the same power as lightning tbh. Just enough to stun someone.

Basically, the glove won't kill but will knock you out. If Rangi naturally resists lightning, then it's possible it may not knock her out. BUT it's also possible that if she does get knocked out, she'll wake up fairly fast (she did that after getting clocked in the face with a fist the force of a truck).

(oh dunno where to put this cause I just realize: one thing that's interesting in how Rangi fights. Multiple times she'll feign leaving herself open. Only to for her to strike at her most deadliest or it just be part of her ploy: she lets the guy hit her on the Lei Tai and then she breaks his leg, she pretends to wobble with Koulin only to knock her tf out when Koulin charges, she takes her time inhaling when fighting Yun then unleashes hell itself on him...just.....hmmm... a tactic she could use against the others, hard to tell if your winning and should take the shot when it could just be a trap...just wanted to throw it out there for food for thought)

Terrain Advantage:

"I know you're going to say there's not a lot of water, but Katara spent a few days in Ba Sing Se so that says a lot more than the other characters! She's at least familiar with the city. The only other person maybe getting close is Asami but she spent most of her time in the upper ring!"

*laughs* Oh you sweet summer child. Rangi probably knows the most about the damn place:

Having a plan to take out Ba Sing Se probs means.....they know the layout fairly well. TT0TT

And this is BEFORE the FN went full imperialist (that stared over 200 years later with Sozin) ajlfklsdja So FN over here just Batman contingency planning the entire world for the love of the fucking game back then I guess jaksfdjal ("Maybe they were always planning" I don't think so tbh, but let's not get into that here, that's for a different post TT0TT)

And with what we know from ATLA to LoK (and even comments in the Kyoshi novels), is that Ba Sing Se and the Earth Kingdom in general are the slowest to change. So even if we're looking at this being ATLA!Ba Sing Se, or even the one from LoK! Ba Sing Se is probs similar to what Rangi learnt in school. (plus I'm pretty sure that "plan" they mentioned is a reference to when Iroh tried to take over so....yeah...still a viable plan even Aang era years later)

Now the area is probably cramped. Asami is probs used to the tight spaces because she grew up/fought in the city. Katara can probs make due cause she's used to being on the run and thinking on her feet with the change of terrain. Kavik is accustomed to cities and keeping his head low, as well as fighting in them. Rangi is Rangi (she can probs fight in an area with 1000 sq ft or 10 sq ft).

We're assuming this place is crowded, but regardless if there's people in it or not, it's still a cramped area.

Kavik is probably the best at evading and having people lose his trail. He most likely is the one who can and should be able to get the drop on people.

Right?

Well, one slight issue. Kavik (and probably anyone else who attempts to cover his trail like him), have a weakness. The sky. "But there's no airbenders in this fight and no gliders." Well....Rangi.

She knows, no, INVENTED Jet-stepping. It allows her to stay in the air and even hop from rooftop to rooftop with ease. Yes she can't do it non-stop. But the rooftops in the lower ring are REALLY close together. So she'll probs be ok. And regardless, she has the best advantage. She has the aerial perspective and can easily get a drop on anyone.

And god help the poor bastard she gets the drop on. She can fall out of damn bison, and land a punch on the ground that shatters stone and leaves a hole where her fist is (her surprise attack on Yun). TT0TT RIP anyone's skull after that (and yes she WAS aiming for a skull when she did that).

So not only would it be hard to evade her, she could get the drop on anyone. AND the fact she's literally "an elite warrior trained in escape and evasion." If anyone needs to pull back and succeed? She's the one doing that. If anyone tries to hide or run? She's probably tracking them down. She knows the place better than anyone there, and can use it to it's full advantage.

tldr; Rangi has the best advantage with this terrain.

Surprise attacks:

Everyone benefits from a surprise attack on someone. Kavik and Rangi are the most likely to be the one's to pull it off. Asami both needs a surprise attack to make her fight easier, but she also needs to do it without revealing what her glove can do.

That being said, Rangi is....a tad weak to surprise attacks. Ok, to be FAIR, I'm pretty sure everyone on this list has been ambushed, followed, and had some kind of surprise attack on them (so no one is infallible here). But it feels like a running gag for Rangi so I wanna address it. TT0TT (it's important to address when it comes down to "who's able to sneak attack whomst" and their ability to do so)

That being said, there's context to each. The first time Tagaka laid a trap and lulled them into a fall sense of security (dumb move team TT0TT) and surprised them.

Then she's drugged from a distance (No one expects the Yuyan Archers and their darts! *looks at text* damn it doesn't allude to them? I though it did oh well, no one expect shirshu venom then!) with shirshu venom and captured. She was not aware of their presence (and if it IS Yuyan, then yeah....they should be in the FN TT0TT)

There's Kyoshi sinking her in the ground in SoK (divorce arc 2!!! *w*), Rangi can't really dig herself out in a timely manner. *cough* good thing she's not fighting any earthbenders here. >w>

Yun burrows and stabs her while she's in the air (she was IN the AIR, he basically air/water spouted his way up but with Earth, the hell is she suppose to consider that?! plus she was trying to watch Kyo's back, the damn distraction! TT0TT)

But that's the thing, it's all things she wouldn't expect: surprise ambush by waterbenders from below, darted by shirshu venom, her gf betraying her tiny trust ;w;, and an earthbender bending like a waterbender into the fucking air and at an insanely fast speed.

They were all scenarios where she was caught completely off guard. Either because the situation was non-combative when she was ambushed (venom/Kyoshi), OR the opponent pulled out a crazy ass move so fast she didn't have time to react. (note: Rangi can handle a burrower, she saved herself and Kyoshi from a shirshu, it's just the combo of her looking out for Kyoshi and Yun pulling out a new move that countered her jetstepping and did it so fast that pulled her up short)

Now remember when I said "does everyone know if they have to fight each other?" (which is also assuming they know what the other looks like for them to do that). Because they should, it doesn't make sense for only some to know and not others. And the reason I bring that up is because.....Rangi knows. She knows 3 other individuals are going to try to knock her out or kill her. She's on high alert. It's going to be A LOT harder for them to get the drop on her. It's very unlikely they can (she's probably going to go airborne and the rest of them won't be expecting it!)

Not impossible, but I don't see Kavik or Katara pulling out a Yun level surprise move (water spouts are high level but I think more commonly known, but not earth spouts, so Rangi would probs keep an eye out for that unlike with the Yun fight). Regardless, she doesn't have Kyoshi to look after, so she is probs just 100% focused on this whole thing (cause part of the reason Yun got her was because she took her attention away to warn Kyoshi of what she saw rather than react).

Anyway, back to Asami (to finish up the surprise section before going to the bending part). If she isn't careful, and lets the others see what her glove can do, she's in trouble. Benders have an advantage of distance. The second she realizes she can't close in, she's cooked. They will (and should) be keeping their distance from her.

So to summarize. Rangi is the most stealthy, followed by Kavik. With everyone knowing they have to fight each other, she'll be on high alert to anyone trying to ambush her. This is assuming any of them realize they should try to look topside for her. Otherwise, she'll probs just use her vantage point to locate and pick them off.

Bending Prowess (aka the section where Asami can sit and rest, RIP my girl u_u):

Katara and Rangi take the cake in terms of bending prowess.

Kavik is decent, proficient, and even knows some advanced and specialized moves. But his are mostly for spying and espionage (from what I remember, sorry baby boi ;w;), but it is still important to note. He's still strong (able to use his tentacles to pick up giant, multiple stacks of plywood and swing it around like a GIANT bat iirc). He can carry heavy amounts of water too, and can bend it even down to a very small particle (small droplets and such). He is at least crafty in what he does as he is strong. But as he says, he admits he can and will lose fights if he needs to (but he's also able to win fights but...we don't know the circumstances to all of that)

....I don't think he's winning against a better waterbender or a insane firebender (a firebender who probably has an ability to probs make him experience PTSD, Koulin fight yeah yeah I'm getting to it).

Both Katara and Rangi are prodigies in their own right. Masters of their elements even at young ages (tho I don't think Rangi is called a "master"? but when Roku graduated school he was considered a master of Fire, and Rangi graduated early so she is probs a master too, it's probs a prerequisite to graduate tbh). Both are sifus to the Avatar. Both have access to or created specialized bending moves in their field.

So in terms of bending, who wins? Katara or Rangi?

Rangi. It's Rangi. I'm sorry but she.....she's winning. "But-" no it's Rangi. "But Azula-" That's not how you spell Rangi. "But Azula is probably better than Rangi!" A potato and a tomato are not the same, that's not Rangi, next! "Silly, Rangi is not better than Azula." I didn't say she was. "But Katara beat Azula, so she should beat Rangi!" No, that's not how this works.

(something to remember, Katara wanted to fight a 2v1 against Azula, so she probs wasn't very confident in their chances against her. If she didn't have that one plan she thought up on the spot, she may not have won)

Katara was a hard counter to Azula, but Rangi is a hard counter to Katara (Azula obvie didn't know how to deal with that ice wall). Rangi does well against waterbenders (to note: Rangi does poorly against earthbenders, but they be playing some dirty tricks! D:< always using her biggest weakness, Kyoshi >_> Kyoshi was right, damn, Rangi would be invincible if not for her love for Kyo....which is why she got stabbed TT0TT)

"Katara was able to freeze Azula during Sozin's Comet! And this is Azula! A blue fire firebender, the hottest fire! Blue is hotter than white! So she's hotter than Rangi! (lol, wordplay). And it's Blue fire with a Comet buff!" Yeah, Azula couldn't combat that. Rangi could.

Rangi did it on a normal damn day, and it wasn't a small ice block like Katara bent, her ass got pulled down into a giant fucking iceberg! Yeah, that first time she got ambushed? Those bastards laid in wait to pull her ass into an iceberg (oh I know Kavik is getting flashbacks when he did something similar, how did they not freeze?! he almost did! don't worry baby boi I'm still wondering too, maybe we can figure it out together later u_u)

You wanna know what Rangi did? She and her mother (who had one not working arm, fyi Rangi just had cuts on her face), not only fought the waterbenders that took them under. The fought back, won, and firebent their way out while saving a chunk of their men. Then went on and kept fighting.

(Tbh, Rangi is probably the one who beat Tagaka. We know she had the power to knock the woman clean on her ass from a distance because she did. And if not her then she tag teamed with her mother. And no it wasn't a 2V1. It was 2vmultiple. They were facing a mini army of waterbenders WHILE fighting Tagaka, and must've won because they managed to captured her TT0TT And Tagaka was a pretty powerful waterbender too!).

Again, this was ALL ON A NORMAL FUCKING DAY! (see my Hei-Ran vs Atuat post for more :'D because I like talking about that feat they did)

So, Rangi was able to do all of that. On a normal day (aka no Sozin's Comet buff). With "weaker" firebending (based form orange-ish and not blue). In a GIANT LAND-SIZED ICEBERG (aka not a lil water wall). Surrounded by the enemy and their native element (aka why I think Kavik and Katara being near a body of water or rain wouldn't make THAT much of a difference, Rangi has proven to be able to withstand being smothered by a waterbender. See? I told you I'd get to this part! yeah yeah still need to talk about the Koulin fight).

Azula either slept through the class that taught you to be a fucking monster (I doubt it), or Rangi is just that fast on her damn feet (she is, she literally invented Jet-stepping on the fly, pun intended!).

I dunno if Rangi could beat Azula. Lightning bending is OP and hax back in the day/pre-LoK (even then it can still knock someone out). I don't even know if she could beat Xu (who is A LOT faster than Azula or Iroh with their lightning, at least pre-comics Azula I think?). But I do know she has a skill set that counters what Azula couldn't beat! :D

"So that's it? That's all you have to go on?" Well yeah, I think that's enough tbh. But if you want me to keep going I can. Remember the screenshot above? Preparedness carries the day? She probably knows a lot of waterbending moves. Like what to expect, maybe how they act. That kind of thing. She operates Kyoshi's flame like a waterbender in a fight against Yun (not the first time Kyoshi thought of Rangi having waterbending type movements). She also tries to teach Kyoshi airbending....she technically failed but this is more her having a vague understanding of it. I wouldn't be surprised if she knows that stuff so she knows what to expect when hit with it.

Airbending would probably be harder for her cause you can't see it, and thus she'll have a harder time dodging....But she's not fighting an airbender. She's fighting two waterbenders (a bending type she seems comfortable against) and a non-bender (and Rangi's proven she can throw hands just fine without her element). In a terrain she is familiar with. With abilities that give her a lot of different upper hands.

Other (insane) abilities of Rangi (just to finish this off):

The fastest person there. No she really is. Powered by gay and fury. And that's without a fire boost! She literally Rocket Powered Naruto Runs in the FN palace at one point. (the only person that could keep up is Katara but she needs water, and even then Katara could just barely outpace Azula during the comet and that might've just been luck. Because in older fights Katara can barely/doesn't keep up with Mai/Ty Lee in fights)

Might have mentioned it above, but I'll repeat it. She is QUICK on her feet. She reacts to openings quickly. She thinks of things quickly! She notices things quickly!

Again, her flying. No one is catching her ass if she decides to run and regroup. TT0TT

Combustion punching. Oh yeah. This. This is the punching that she and Koulin do when they fight. This apparently normal in the after hours of the academy for midnight brawls (not horrifying at all :D). It's not combustion bending per se (doesn't go a distance), but it deals a combustive blow when it lands on impact. (probably the punch she aimed at Yun's head when she fell from the ground tbh, mixed with actual flame). It deals heavy damage, she can take it, and just seeing her whip this out is grounds to probs scare Kavik (IYKYK).

She as access to the uber white flame. No her base fire isn't white, but after 3 breathes she can unleash it. Remember how big the flames got for firebenders during Sozin's Comet? Specifically during the last Agni Kai w/Azula vs Zuko? Yeah that's Rangi's special move, but white flames instead of blue or orange (more powerful than orange, but not as strong as blue). It's literally hell incarnate. It disintegrates anything that it touches, and it is BIG and it goes FAR.

She can both take potshots at someone while being in the air (she can't stay in the air forever, but it still an option).

Not insane, but she probably has a lot of knowledge on waterbenders. Just from being around Kirima and Atuat (and maybe what her mother may have told her/learnt from Kuruk, since his team seemed to be keen on sharing between bending arts). She knows just how deadly and accurate Kirima is capable of (even being able to walk on mist!) And then she probably watched how Atuat was able to preform miracles on her mother and train the Avatar in a month.

Tldr; Rangi is a force of nature and a terrifying opponent, let alone her being pissed off when fighting too. She has her weaknesses, but none of the opponents are ones that can exploit it.

This is why I think Rangi would win. Katara is her biggest issue, but I think she could beat her. Kavik and Asami would still put up a good fight, but they'd probs get overpowered. u_u

"Ok but Silly, you didn't talk about Katara's healing! Or plant bending or-" It either won't be much help in a quick combat scenario (healing), or it's not applicable or useable (bloodbending/plantbending). I can see Katara stealing water from produce in the market square. But there's not a lot of plants in the lower ring from the looks of it to utilize plant bending. Rangi might not give her a chance to heal, and I don't think she can heal herself that fast....and healing won't work out much if you are knocked out TT0TT (I'll talk about bloodbending down below).

"Ok, so what would need to happen for her to lose?"

The person who can best surprise attack her and have her stay down is Asami, there's still a good chance that glove will knock her out. But that doesn't mean she can't get back up (same for the other's, but one combustive punch to the head will knock you out cold or kill you tbh).

I mean, Lao Ge is right, a rock to the head can work wonders for knocking one out or killing them. Same can probs go for ice too. Or loading up a waterwhip with a rock inside it.

But this assuming they can get the drop on her or hit her with a good windup.

They could gang up on her. The only issue is HOW and WHY? Did she prove she's the biggest threat? I feel like she would be a lot stealthier than that (she's proven to be able to stealthy while infiltrating a prison and that probs meant fighting too all while being fairly quick an efficient, from what we gather from when she broke into a prison). If anyone is going to take someone out silently and cleanly it'll be her. She's more likely to silently pick them apart, and she has the skill set.

The only way this works is if they get information ahead of time to team up against her, or she's unaware that she's in a battle royal (which makes no sense).

I think the key for a team up is if Katara and Kavik somehow overcome the urge to steal their resource and decide to share it. (cooperation is what Watertribe/waterbenders do best). But.....I can also easily see them not trusting the other and thus not fighting side by side. And even if they team up, again, Rangi fought off an mini army of daofei waterbenders and Tagaka on a damn iceberg surrounded by water/ice and apparently won. I think she can handle a 2v1 waterVfire TT0TT (girl ain't normal I swear)

The only way I see a realistic way of her losing is with Katara, specifically:

Bloodbending. Katara can win if she bloodbends. Now some issues: 1) No full moon here, 2) does she even want to do that (she's uncomfy with it from what I remember except for revenge/survival, but let's pretend she's down for it), 3) non-waterbenders can still resist bloodbending if they are determined enough (ex: Mako against Amon, probably the better bloodbender).

But, bloodbending is not an insta win. 1) there may be a range (aka they can stay out of her range), 2) Asami knows about bloodbending (maybe it's common knowledge about Katara or Korra told her, but she also knows about it because of Amon and Tarrlok). So if she can convince Kavik and Rangi to help take her out it might prove that it's more of a giant target she put on her back.

Kavik and Rangi can easily still hit her outside the range. And maybe they can distract her long enough for Asami to attempt a sneak attack (or at least the attempt will distract her before she gets blasted). But then with Katara taken out, they realize very quickly they have to fight Rangi and rip. u_u

Maybe Rangi backs off and lets them duke it out amongst themselves (let them have some spotlight, plus I'd like to see Kavik vs Asami. I can see him doing his evade maneuver and then surprise attacking her. Or she bodies him in a hand to hand fight).

But...uhh....yeah. Anyway, this is why I think Rangi would win considering the setting (and what we know of it), the people involved, and the abilities of everyone there (that can be utilized). (Katara is a close second after Rangi I think tho).

[clarasghosts]

I haven't seen the wwdits finale yet, and based on what I've read about it (critical praise, fan complaints, and some plot points), I don't know that I ever will. one thing (but not the only) that annoys me is this insistence that "nothing ever changes", like that's somehow been the theme of the show all along. but the truth is that didn't become the theme until season four. things very much did change in seasons one through three. guillermo was always a dynamic character from the start of the series, and the discovery of his van helsing side affected members of the household and created tension, ultimately leading to growth and a changing role for him in season three (which seemed to be largely retconned in later seasons). nandor was weary of his long life, which propelled a story arc leading to him leaving the household to travel. after guillermo's arc led to them becoming the new vampiric council, nadja took to power and ambition, and looked forward to what she might be able to do as she rose in status. laszlo's discovery of colin's impending death changed how he behaved toward colin, leading him to do the unthinkable - lie to and separate from nadja in order to take care of a newly birthed baby colin.

these were massive fucking changes in the lives of the characters. season three ended on the note that nothing would be the same. nandor believed he'd been abandoned, nadja was heading to england where she would be in a greater position of power, not knowing her husband had left her at the last moment and trapped guillermo into accompanying her.

and then the start of season four deliberately ignored all of these conflicts and stakes. nadja wasn't actually mad at laszlo. nandor wasn't mad at guillermo or laszlo. baby colin was still there, but by the end of the season, that wouldn't matter either. nadja's vampire council storyline was thrown away with a quick line and brief flashback.

I get that they probably didn't have the budget for something huge abroad, but some close-up exterior shots in some of the older streets on the east coast could pass for some english town, and the rest could be interior shots. the characters could even return to new york without immediately erasing all the conflicts set up at the end of season three. the only real answer for what we ultimately got was bad writing.

I often see people complain that the show went downhill after jemaine left, and I think that's always been more in terms of humor than plot because the season three plot built directly from the season two plot (in all honesty, the humor has been fine for me personally). to me, the writing started to decline after stefani left, and the writers that remained all got hung up on their own egos.

sometimes I wonder what happened behind the scenes. why did stefani leave? she's listed as the co-writer for the season four premiere (which is the start of what I'm complaining about here), but was already no longer an executive producer (no longer had creative control) and then disappears from the writing credits altogether. and, whether related to her or not, I've wondered what led to the writers deciding that, not only would nothing really change in the household going forward, but that the audience should feel foolish for believing things would change. after the disappointment of the writers just throwing away the season three finale, the audience was willing (largely) to go with whatever happened next, embracing marwa's character. only for that to be thrown in our faces by the end of the season. then came the mystery behind guillermo's failed transformation and laszlo's experiments, only for the latter to be dropped as if it never happened.

I don't understand the critical praise for this all being so clever, when it's really just the end product of writers who can write funny scenes and good individual episodes, but largely don't seem able to write actual arcs or plots. it's not just threads never getting resolved, it's also threads never connecting. it's not clever to consistently have no larger vision of what you're writing or not be able to maintain a long and cohesive plot.

[cogentranting]

So the announced cast list is:

Matt Damon, Tom Holland, Anne Hathaway. Zendaya, Lupita Nyong'o, Robert Pattinson and Charlize Theron. (Variety lists them in that order). So here's my thoughts on who's who.

Damon- Odysseus. He seems to be the one billed as the star and he makes more sense as this than Pattinson or CERTAINLY Holland.

Holland- Telemachus. He's the one who's the right age in that group and I don't really know who else he would be that would be cast already.

Hathaway- Penelope. Age fits. Nyong'o probably isn't gonna be playing Tom Holland's mother. And she fits the Penelope vibe better than Theron.

Pattinson- I'm thinking Antinous or Eurymachus (whichever gets focused on as the main suitor). That's the next most important male character, likely to be cast early. He's also the right age (smack in the middle between Odysseus and Telemachus; old enough to have been pursuing Penelope a while and see Telemachus as a kid but young enough to have not gone to war with Odysseus). Also possible that hes Eurylochus or another member of Odysseus's crew that Nolan wants to bring a little bit forward, but I think the suitor is more likely.

That leaves us with 3 women: Zendaya, Nyong'o, and Theron. Our main female roles remaining are: Athena, Circe, and Kalypso. (Also Nausicaa, Eurykleia, and like... Arete or Helen or Melantho)

Lupita Nyong'o or Charlize Theron seem more likely for Athena than Zendaya. If Variety's order corresponds with billing then I'd say that puts Nyong'o as Athena.

Zendaya is the weird one. Nausicaa or Melantho seem to be the characters as written that would most call for someone like Zendaya (that is to say, a woman half Odysseus's age). But also... neither of them is important. Certainly not top 7 Odyssey characters that you would cast first. She's too young to be Arete or Helen or Eurykleia. She could be either Circe or Kalypso though. Either of those, following the epic, puts her into a romantic/sexual situation with Odysseus and that's weird if it's Zendaya and Matt Damon. I don't feel good about that. However, you COULD remove that aspect of the Circe storyline without altering the story too much. (Also, not to suggest Zendaya and Tom Holland being in a movie together means they have to play a couple--they don't, obviously--but there are some later stories in the mythos where Circe marries Telemachus.) So I think Zendaya being here probably means some sort of narrative change: either a minor character being expanded or a somewhat different interpretation of Circe (or maybe Kalypso).

Theron I think is definitely playing a goddess. Which one depends. Of our female cast she's got the most menace, so whichever fits that role best. So it depends on how you play Circe and Kalypso.

Okay Chris let's go!!