#his idiot idiot boyfriend

[dsofi427]

*Proceeds to voluntarily shove a metal object into an electrical socket*

She is stuck in an endless loop of being done with him while also enjoying his shenanigans

[bbbbbbbbatman]

Bruce gets accosted by reporters and one of them asks "Is it true that you're in competition with Superman to win Batman's affections?" and he is so taken aback bc what the fuck are they even talking about? There are a million questions going through his head such as, since when was superman into batman? since when was this public knowledge? wtf did bruce say to imply that he was into batman as well? And he doesn't have an answer to any of these questions so he just smiles and says, "No, I'm not. The word competition implies that Superman has a chance, which he does not."

why did he say that? Bruce doesn't know, it just felt like that's how Bruce Wayne would've responded bc what's more Brucie than fighting with Superman for Batman's heart? anyway, upon reflection, this was maybe not the best response in terms of long term consequences, but he's committed to the bit now.

a week after all this goes down, news reporter Clark Kent is caught saying that Batman deserves better than Bruce Wayne, so is a third suitor putting his hat in the ring to win over batman?

[crowlixcx]

[rouge-the-bat]

this is them @ each other. and their friends too

[obsessedwithstarwars]

Question for the DP fandom:

Do you think Danny’s hair turns white when it falls out? It’s technically dead cells anyway but when it naturally falls off his head, do you think it turns white? Because I think it would be hilarious if his hairbrush just has white hair, no black strands whatsoever, and his significant other thought the worst until they know his secret.

[crowleys-hips]

[grimark]

i love how in the first two seasons of doctor who, Mickey Smith, regular human guy who i am led to believe works as a car mechanic, has absolutely unparalleled hacking skills just whenever the plot requires it. first time it happened it was bc the doctor gave him the top secret UNIT password that lets any random dickhead with a laptop fire a missile out of a submarine directly at london. but all on his own he's casually clicked his way into high security military databases at least twice since then. if you were a character on a tv show in the 2000s, just knowing how to turn a computer on was enough to give you hacker superpowers.

[nenestansunsthings]

having svsss au ideas beyond my station

thinking. shang qinghua goes on a mission as a young disciple to some town in fuckoff nowhere and finds himself in the qiu household. and there he finds a young shen jiu, undergoing the plot he originally intended for him and hadn't realised had become real and he's so young oh god hes so young why is he so small what do you mean that part was real, he hadn't kept it why is it real—

and he panics and sneaks him the Fuck out of that house

and he's not sure what to do but surely sending him to cang qiong will fuck up something in the plot and he can't come under even more investigation and cang qiong tryouts dont happen for months anyway and his system would probably never allow it (it doesnt. it would interfere with yue qingyuans story) but shen jiu is refusing to stay anywhere near this place and wants to learn cultivating to protect himself make sure nothing like this ever happens again and sqh panics harder and

calls mobei jun.

okay. on second thought, maybe this was a bad idea. but he stumbles over himself and shushes baby shen jiu's very understandable freaking out and asks his king for the first thing hes ever asked for other than his own life.

is there any way this human child could learn cultivation in the demon world?

[introspectivememories]

im sorry but i choose to believe that tim drake is the most insufferable "my man, my man, my man" girl about bear. he does not shut up about him. steph is cooking smth in the kitchen? oh my man can do that. bear cooks really well. dick triaging some poor victim on an emergency site? oh my man is really good at that. mhmm, bear is on his way to becoming a paramedic. damian building something? oh my man is really good with power tools. have you ever seen him build ikea? it takes him less than an hour. for our anniversary, he built me a coffee table. mhmm isn't he amazing? yeah my man did that. yeah my man, mhmm that's my ma-

[potato-lord-but-not]

Which of the boys is the most dramatic when they get sick? And which of them is good at taking care of the others?

Oscar keeping these three from perishing of a minor cold, we owe him so much

[b4kuch1n]

simulated earth (it does not matter)

transcript

[iwanttobeacheesecake]

.....later?

[arsenicflame]

It's a time-honoured tradition- every time Sam comes across Izzy (and Ed) in their travels, he asks Izzy to marry him. And every time, Izzy turns him down.

At this point, Sam is asking more for the sake of it than any belief Izzy will ever say yes, a remnant of childhood dedication touched with 30 years of heartbreak and regret- though even now, a small part of him still holds out hope. Sam's promises have only got more extravagant over the years, from a job as his first mate, to a captaincy, a fleet at his command, a whole fucking island if that's what Izzy wants- but he knows it isn't though, not really. If Izzy was ever going to agree to marry him, to leave his life and go with Sam, it wouldn't be for anything Sam could offer him. Izzy never did care for flashy shows of wealth, for a ship or to be captain. The only thing that ever mattered to him was loyalty given, and loyalty shown in return. 

It all comes to a head after Stede left and came back, after Izzy lost a toe, lost his leg. Sam hasn't seen him since before things with Ed started to really slide off the rails, before stress permanently set into the lines of Izzy’s face. So, when he sees a dishevelled man with a hoof for a leg in a no-name port, he doesn't even consider the idea that he might know him. It's only when he turns towards him, and Sam catches a glance at those oh too familiar tattoos, he realises this is Izzy, his Izzy, that stands before him.

Knowing Izzy's discomfort with pity, he doesn't treat him any differently than he would in years gone by, positioning himself in Izzy's line of sight before approaching and sweeping him up into a bone crushing hug. 

“Israel-goddamn-Hands!” he exclaims, as Izzy grumbles back a begrudging “Samuel-fucking-Bellamy”, a tradition almost as old as their friendship itself. Izzy might not hug him back, but he can’t keep the corner of his mouth from twitching, just for a second.

(If Sam holds Izzy a little tighter and a little longer than usual, well. That's his business)

By the time Sam lets go, most of the crew has appeared in the town square, drawn in by the commotion. They may have given Izzy his leg and welcomed him as one of them, but still there’s an underlying tension, with nobody quite ready to set aside everything that happened before the Kraken. Seeing him cosying up to an unknown man sets everyone on edge, unsure whether to come to their first mate’s aid, or to assume that they've been betrayed once again.

When Ed sees that the yelling was Sam, his hand goes tense where it's held in Stede's. He knows the routine, has seen it more times than he can count, but as he watches them part he realises that this is the first time in a long time he's unsure of what Izzy's response will be.

Knowing that something’s different, knowing that Izzy's feeling vulnerable already, Sam doesn't go for the same flashy proposal he’s been giving for years. He doesn't promise Izzy the world, he doesn't cause a scene (or, any more of a scene than he already has, anyway). He looks at the fractured man in front of him, takes his face in his hands, and says the exact same thing to him he said when they were little more than boys. “Israel, I have to ask you. I know what you'll say, but I have to try. Come with me. Marry me and sail away with me. I'll keep you safe”

And Izzy… hesitates. He glances over at Ed, at Stede, and says to Sam “...We’re staying in port for a week. Ask me again then”

That's the moment Sam knows there is something deeply, horribly, wrong. He's not just looking at an Izzy who got seriously injured in a fight and is struggling to cope, this is something so much bigger than that- and that Ed has something to do with it. Izzy wouldn't even be considering leaving if he didn't. Whether it was negligence or something more sinister, Sam doesn't yet know, but he intends to find out.

[cosmicrzy]

still love this show soo much

[bornwholocker]

Phoenix Wright, the only man to somehow be too gay for the arts

[fartshitpiss]

whatever you do don't think about Wade dancing to You Sexy Thing by Hot Chocolate in his boxers in the kitchen. and definitely don't think about a sleepy Logan coming in rubbing his eyes and grumbling about the music being too loud and waking him up. and for your sake don't even consider how Wade would slide over the hardwood in his socks, spatula microphone in hand, and force Logan into his choreography