#hi clock :)

[wasabi-gumdrop]

local ladies man’s signature move totally useless against autistic monster enthusiast. more on Kabru’s fumble era at 6

[hinamie]

9 / 266

[the-raindeer-king]

Imagine Simon's mom doesn't die with Tommy and Beth. Maybe she was out of town, or at a friend's house, and Roba's men were sloppy and missed her. Anyway, so it's just Simon and her now, and because he blames himself for what happened, he's pulled away from her.

He pays her rent, even if he wanted her to live in a nicer apartment complex. And he visits during her birthday and Mother's Day, and sometimes just randomly stops by. But he never stays very long, and he doesn't tell her a lot about his new life. It's a very one sided relationship, but she tries to make the best of it.

And then you move in next door, during one of Simon's deployments. You feel bad for the sweet lady that lives next to you. She never seems to have much company, and you take it upon yourself to befriend her, spending more time in her apartment than your own.

You learn about her ex husband, her sons, the tragedy, and most importantly, you learn about Simon. And you hate him. Mrs. Riley (she insists you call her Sarah) is such a lovely woman, and it's clear how much she cares about her living son, how hard she's trying to keep their relationship alive.

It's the second Mother's Day after you move in when you finally meet Simon. Your relationship with your own mother is complicated, so you've opted to spend the day with Mrs. Riley. You'd gotten her a small present, and had planned to spend the day drinking wine and watching historical romance movies.

You're thoroughly shocked when you knock on her door, and a man answers. Six feet, built like a brick house, but under his scowl, you recognize Sarah's eyes.

“You must be Simon.”

His scowl deepens, but before he can say anything, Mama Riley is pushing past him, pulling you into her apartment to fuss over you.

She apologizes for not telling you sooner, but your plans will have to be rescheduled. Simon's back early, and she can't waste a precious second.

You're understanding. You've listened to her worried rants, given her space to cry over how things have turned out. You know she loves spending time with her son, even if the visits are short and he doesn't talk much.

Simon doesn't miss the way you glare at him. There's a fury in your eyes, even as you cheerily wish his mother a happy mother's day. For a moment, he wonders if you're a spy. But that thought is quickly diminished, when you verbally eviscerate him at the door.

You're quiet, not wanting to upset his mom, but your anger is clear. It may not be your business, but Mama Riley is your friend, and you adore the older woman. And you cannot stand by while he treats her like this. She loves her son so much, and he needs to step up and try harder.

As you're chewing him out, Simon's already head over heels, planning your wedding as the seconds tick by.

(A/N: You can read this as a stand alone piece, but I did write 3 more drabbles (four in total!) for this! They're all on my blog under the tag mama riley au. Thank you for reading!)

Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

[foldingfittedsheets]

I think it was about a month into dating my betrothed that I first turned to them and said, “You smell hungry, want to get some lunch?”

“I what? I smell hungry?”

“Yeah, like, the empty smell. Aren’t you hungry?”

They were, but it was hard for them to accept smelling a state of being. After a few weeks of me pointing it out right before they realized it themself though they asked, “What does hunger smell like?”

“Bad.”

“That’s not helpful.”

“It’s like… an emptiness that goes past the mouth? Bad breath is more upfront but hunger is like you’re smelling stomach acid, it’s all the way from an empty belly.”

They started smelling my mouth in exaggerated silly fashion but eventually they did start to recognize it.

They’re now very smug when they get to use the skill back at me and inform me that I’m hungry.

[rottmntrulesall]

DEFINITELY my two favorite sins

I would pay with my life savings to see these two kick the shit out of Mammon

[mxmarsbars]

third time’s a charm!

[cherriiramen]

Whenever I think of the Harley/Joker queer besties dynamic, I picture this

[its-kinda-snowy]

Dan! Dan- stop fighting me- I have just made an incredible leap in our serum you must see it.

[wolfythewitch]

Do you think Jesus ever felt homesick. Do you think he missed his mom

[hyunpic]

HYUNJIN ꕤ STAY HIDEOUT

[shepscapades]

For those begging for dbhc mumbo angst, unfortunately (?) this is just about as bad as it gets for him (as far as I have planned, anyway). All I can think of when it comes to dbhc mumbo is how silly goofy pathetic he is so for now he gets spared from serious angst <3

(doc, on the other hand, gets closer and closer to combusting the more he gets to know everyone)

also, a bonus below the cut bc scar is no better :]

[hinamie]

i don't normally participate in these redraw challenges but it's megumi so i'll make an exception

[lotus-pear]

god i love skk sm i wish gay ppl were real :(

[drawballa]

ModernAU Jayvik! I repeat, MODERNAU JAYVIK!!

[scyllas-dogs]

HGGFSSSDHGXX- ur Zeus x Odysseus content is keeping me going aaaaaaaaa- god(s), Zeus catching feels for this lil’ jackass n then being sad when he goes back to the people he actually wants to be with is so juicy mmmmm- love that kinda thing hehe drama, drama everywhere >:]]]

zeus actually somehow retains negative rizz when he cant figure out how to seduce someone

[mxmarsbars]

clethimpdubs

heavily inspired by this post by @/JUJUBAMP4 on twitter i saw it and had a vision