#hes okay now

[a-chicken-with-adhd]

My dog vomited on my blanket today, I am down one cover for my bed. 3/4.

[cartooncadet666]

"Is zat tight enough son?" Dr. Buttocks tied the eye patch tightly on Skeebo's head, adjusting the position of the patch by a bit.

"Yeah... Why is it comfortable though?" He asked, rubbing the patch gently.

"The more comfortable, the more you won't vant to take it off by uncomfort. It's common logic zat my brother makes half ze time." He softly chuckled, which kind of concerned the teenager.

"To be honest, I was expecting more harsh things when I got here. You and Betrayus seem a little more soft than what people say." He remarked, earning a ruffle in the hair by the scientist.

"There's a lot of things people don't know about us son. It's all part of being ze opposite team. Besides, we just expect more from ze older ghosts here, zat's probably vat you heard." Dr. Buttocks crossed his arms. "No vere is my brother with zat jewel?"

"Jewel? I never knew that ghosts smoke-" Skeebo grimaced in a childish disgust. He heard the scientist chuckle, which actually seemed nice to hear, it wasn't like a regular evil laugh, he could tell by that.

"I got your jewel brother... Why are you smiling like that?" Butler had a gem of some sort in his hands, which was grabbed quickly from his twin.

"Skeebo is a very interesting kid, honestly I'm hoping this thing can reveal something about his eye." Obviously, Dr. Buttocks ignored the question that was given, but that didn't stop Butler's curiosity.

As soon as his brother looked away, Butler floated next to the freckled one. "Did you say a joke or something?"

"I guess? I mean he asked where the 'jewel' was and I just asked him if ghosts can actually smoke." Skeebo ruffled his hair a bit, liking how voluminous it was messy.

"O-Oh.." Butler snickered. "I-I see." He looked back at his brother once again, noticing a smile on his face that was very familiar. "I haven't seen him smile like that in ages.." He thought, "How did he do that..?"

"Aha! Here's ze secret of ze eye! Son, your eye just seems corrupted, it may have appeared when you died, something from your life made it change your anatomy!" There was clear excitement in his tone. He rushed towards a cabinet that a little ghost boy was next to, "Excuse me Carter." He rummaged around in the cabinet and pulled out an old blueprint then rushed back to his screen.

Skeebo and Butler exchanged glances while watching the scientist rambling random nonsense, even the little ghost boy started getting curious and watched his foster father mumble away.

"Papa?" He called, "Why does he have an eyepatch?"

"His eye is scary to look at, it's for people's safety, no offense Skeebo." Dr. Buttocks traced an outline on the blue paper and looked towards his screen.

"None taken." The freckled ghost rolled his eyes.

"Can I have one?" Carter asked, "Just for today at least?"

"I'll make you one later okay? I just need to finish zis real quick."

"Okay." He smiled at his response.

"Holy- Uh Skeebo?" Dr. Buttocks looked at the teenager.

"Mhm?" He looked up.

"When you made eye contact with Betrayus and Inky, vat did you see?" At that question, Skeebo just pondered, he didn't exactly remember.

"Umm.. I remember seeing a small door banging and looking like it got closer. I also remember Betrayus screaming the President's name." At that Butler raised his head and stared at the teenager with concern.

The lab stayed silent for a while, the only thing heard was the sounds of machines clanking and shifting on the inside.

"Try and keep that eyepatch over your eye okay? Making complete eye contact with someone could make bad things happen to your ghostly body." The scientist broke the silence, he felt understood when Skeebo nodded immediately.

{Background after Skeebo recovered, and yes, Dr. Buttocks has a baby boy, you're welcome people. Betrayus shouldn't be the only father.}

[artkaninchenbau]

Crocodile finds a strange stray cat an 11-year old Nico Robin (AU where they met 13 years earlier. Robin's been on the run from the World Government for 3 years. Crocodile's 27 and has not set up base in Alabasta yet)

It seems like I have become possessed. By some sort of demon.

Bonus:

[eydilily]

would you bite the hand that feeds you?

[hinamie]

in spite of everything, I had fun <3

[bacchuschucklefuck]

no more fan-ta-sizing about it! everything's already changed~

[paintedcrows]

Holiday Classics

Been thinking about Ford watching the 70s Animated Lord of the Rings Movies... (companion comic to this post!)

[forgettable-au]

PROLOGUE

FORGETTABLE-AU (Page 1-9)

AND SO IT BEGINS!

[CONTINUE] [MASTERPOST]

[seagull9111]

as a fandom we need to talk about how funny this scene was

romans: *nervous*

nico: *enjoying himself*

[sugarlywhispers]

the sudden thought of bakugou katsuki sending an audio to his s/o while at the gym, where he speaks IN BETWEEN GASPS AND GRUNTS AND EVEN GROWLS BECAUSE OF THE AMOUNT OF WEIGHT HE'S LIFTING WHILE ALSO TALKING ABOUT WHAT YOU WOULD LIKE FOR DINNER AND SUGGESTING MEALS OR PLEACES TO GO IF YOU WANT AND THEN HE SAYS, "Ugh... whatever you... mmh... want, baby, it's yours..." AND HE EXHALES FUCKING SEXILY AS THE SOUND OF THE WEIGHT DROPPING IS HEARD.

— I'M DYING HELP.

[noisilyscreechingsong]

Damian is de-aged to a baby and lost in Gotham. A magic user hit him with some kind of spell. His legs don’t work as well and he has trouble walking. That’s when a man appears and squats down with a tilt of his head.

“Yea, you are definitely not supposed to be out here, little guy.”

Damian glares at the man, early twenties, stubble along his jaw, ragged clothes, and dark bags under his eyes.

The man turns his head to look at the brick wall.

“Are you sure?”

And now he was talking to a wall. Curses. Of course he would be found by a crazy person.

The man suddenly hangs his head with a deep sigh. He regains himself quickly and stands. Moving closer to put his hands under Damian arms to lift him to perch on his hip.

Damian squirms to get down but refuses to make a sound. The last time he opened his mouth like this it was a pathetic baby sound. He couldn’t let this man see him like this.

“Looks like you’re coming home with me, little guy. I can tell you’ve got some spirit in you. Good, you’ll need it.”

Not ominous at all.

Damian stays with the man, mostly because he couldn’t physically drive a car, but also because he was almost always with him. The man would talk to air at the most random times. Obviously a schizophrenic. But Damian had to admit this man, Danny he comes to find out through a neighbor baby talking at him, has been genuinely trying to take care of him and take care of him well. Well, to the best of his abilities anyway. 

He feeds him organic purées that don’t taste half bad, except the carrots, that one was unacceptable. Danny cleans him regularly despite his crappy apartment and makes sure he is dressed appropriately for the weather. He makes an effort to take him out to the park to play in the sandbox or just walk around discovering ‘new’ things.

Damian doesn’t need a parent, he outgrew the concept when he was five and technically he already had one, but he could tell Danny would make an excellent father. Some mistakes can be overlooked compared to the effort he was putting in.

The only concerning thing was the talking to thin air. It took Damian an embarrassing amount of time to figure out the reason Danny was visiting all these random people and the graveyard. (Sometimes he will set Damian down to ‘play’ in the grass at the cemetery. It was quite odd.)

He was talking to ghosts. It wasn’t thin air or imaginary friends, no it was actually dead people. The reason Damian actually believes this is for two reasons.

One, Danny shows true results. Damian observes closely whenever they visit a ‘client’ and Danny always has accurate information despite never looking up or researching anything going in.

Two, he never calls himself a medium or psychic. He doesn’t boast about his ability to see ghosts. He does what he does to help the ghosts move on to the other side. Closure is what Danny always says. Closure for the family and the victim. In Gotham, there are a lot of victims.

Damian adjusts to his new life with Danny. It’s been five months and he’s getting used to being small and vulnerable. He’s allowed to be messy and whiny and childish. Danny never scolds him like Mother did. The man has never hit him or raised his voice at him and never expects anything from him. He encourages his progression to speak and walk, but doesn’t expect the best out of him.

It’s… nice. A good break if anything.

They are at the park when one of the bats spot him and pauses. Danny is blowing bubbles into the air and Damian tries to pop as many as he can. It’s a silly game with no clear rules, but Damian finds it entertaining nonetheless.

“Hi there! Is he yours?”

Dick Grayson wears a bright smile, but Damian can see the tightness around his eyes.

“Huh? Oh, yea, this is Damian,” Danny answers.

He had written it with the wooden blocks Danny had given him one week in. Danny took one look at the name on the ground, laughed loudly and ran with it.

“Do you mind if I say hi? He’s so cute.”

Danny looks puzzled by the request but ends up shrugging his shoulders, not seeing a problem with letting a stranger get close to Damian. (Damian knew Danny’s intense eyes were watching Dick’s every move. He was very protective like that.)

“Sure.”

Dick squats down to search Damian’s green eyes. Damian stares back just as intensely.

“Hey there, Damian. My name is Dick.”

Damian gives him a flat look at Dick’s terrible introduction.

“Grayson.”

Although with his little baby teeth not fully in it sounds more like ‘way-shah’.

Relief flashes across Dick’s face and he gives Damian a reassuring smile. It’s not as reassuring at he thinks it is. It promises to bring him home and restore him to his original age. Damian doesn’t know if that’s what he wants anymore.

Dick stands and gives Danny some imaginary excuse to leave quickly. Damian watches him go and so does Danny.

“Funny guy, huh Dami?”

Damian doesn’t respond and Danny notices his change in mood.

“Come here, little guy.”

He knows what Danny is going to do and willingly goes. He is pulled up into the man’s lap and held between two surprisingly muscular arms. Danny’s hugs are nice and warm. They aren’t too tight like Dick’s nor are they stiff like Bruce’s. He never thought he could enjoy human contact, but Danny has been showing him things about himself he didn’t ever know. Turns out he does like hugs and playing airplane and when Danny runs his fingers through his hair when he’s really sleepy.

“Let’s go home a little early today, huh? I’ll make spaghetti and you can be as messy as you want,” Danny promises.

Damian hums. Yes, that sounds nice.

That night Batman comes in through the window. Damian is waiting.

“Damian,” Batman whispers.

“Bah-mun.”

The flat, unamused stare is what gives him away.

Batman lets out a breath silently and reaches into the crib Danny had gotten him.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you.”

Batman jerks into action, twisting to face Danny who had appeared suddenly. The door behind him is still closed.

Batman stays quiet, silently studying the man before him dressed in pajama pants and a worn t-shirt.

Danny tilts his head as he does the same. Damian has never seen the man so serious. He silently worries for the man. He didn’t want him getting hurt to unnecessarily protecting him from his father.

“I’d have to break your arm if you tried to do what it looks like you’re doing.”

Danny says it so plainly. So simple.

Batman straightens.

“He isn’t yours.”

He doesn’t say Damian is his. He doesn’t claim him as his own. Just that Danny shouldn’t have him.

Damian silently agrees because technically he’s right. He doesn’t deserve Danny. He can’t keep playing house like he’s an actual baby. But Damian is also selfish and over the last few months has been taught that it’s okay to ask for things he wants even if it’s not inherently beneficial. The stuffed dog he sleeps with every night is proof of that.

So Damian says nothing.

“He is now,” Danny answers simply like there was no other answer to such a statement.

“He needs to go back to where he belongs.”

“Over my dead body,” is the immediate response.

They stare each other down until Danny scoffs.

“Don’t think I’m not petty enough to fight you, Batman. I’ll fight anyone who wants to take him from me. Damian is mine.”

When Batman tries to forcibly take him, he ends up with a concussion, a blood nose, and two broken arms. Red Robin finds him in a dumpster the next morning.

The story continues with Damian learning how to be a child his age, Danny protecting him and doting on his brilliant son, and the Batfam’s frequent failed attempts to kidnap Damian back to them.

[egophiliac]

should've just let Vil be the one to fly, it would've gone SO much easier. 😔

also HEY how are everyone else's pulls going, because I have had the most RIDICULOUS luck, seriously, halloween magic is 100% real

[zillychu]

I decided Danny needed a fire core AU where the portal accident blew up the entire block, condemned all of Amity, and was left to haunt it for 100 years before Sam and Tuck find him 🥰 for enrichment

[demaparbat-hp]

There is no such thing as personal space between them.

[lefthandarm-man]

COUNTDOWN TO STEVE'S 106TH BIRTHDAY posting my favorite steve things to celebrate!

day 2: randomly serving cunt

[aleatoryw]

we poke fun at obi-wan for saying "sith lords are our specialty" and then getting his ass kicked by dooku, but in fairness, he was at the time the only person in living memory to have actually killed a sith. he showed remarkable humility honestly.