#hes autistic. i know this because i know him personally.

[themesis]

[mecachrome]

#i wish it weren't taboo to talk about how 814 are literally just an audhd couple... could discuss this for days. does anyone want to

actually yes i would like nothing more this is lowkey all i think about sometimes

HLSDKFHLH i was about to publish my own post but now i feel enabled to write a Longer Response 🧡 thank u guys

2 me 814 is Girl who is so classically adhd it's comical (overt hyperfixations + poor executive function + basically arfid + time blindness) coexists beautifully with Misunderstood autistic girl (too straightforward for other people + pretended to be a car as a child + sensory issues through the roof + consciously masking in every interview) while everyone loses their minds because they should Hate Each Other and be at each other's throats??! and yet they don't because their neurodivergent swag transcends petty team politics 💗

like honestly i think they interact easily because they're both weird & particular in their own ways but their priorities are ultimately the same so why would any of that matter you know? and they try to accommodate each other when they're able to even if it's little things like oscar not eating salmon around lando anymore lol 😭 (i say this as audhd guy with extreme sensory issues and many other Problems and Issues... that is in fact romanze to me. also little stuff like the No Name Drop? moment because yes it's small in the grand scheme of things but to me it's special because it's like... THEIR inside joke and oscar is proving he does enjoy it and cares about maintaining it :') and then when lando was feeling down post-race in brazil he pulled out landinho all on his own <3)

like this is so random but i was just rewatching the logan sexed bit earlier and it's so funny how oscar is just like ??? WHAT. and somewhat annoyed at being grilled about it because in his head he's thinking "it's literally just a show title why are you Willfully Misunderstanding me idg why that's so funny to you are you 5." but with lando there's so much less... idk laughing At each other as if there's some big joke one person is missing out on and more just giggling together because oscar thinks every little thing lando says is funny and because they're equally charmed by each other's particularities. like oscar doesn't mind that lando is super fidgety and respects that he has Depths (saying that lando is a mix of sarcastic/dry, excitable, and serious) while lando has joked that oscar is somewhat robotic before but obviously still revels in wheedling genuine reactions out of him :') like you can see from how they get caught up in their little world while in parc fermé or doing their f1 media duties that they're capable of just focusing on Each Other without a care in the world for other people and they aren't talking just to have content for the cameras...

and like again the whole point of f1 is that it's a media circuit that needs overextended drama to survive as a consumable product but in the end neither of them care to sustain these artificial demands because it's just antithetical to their personalities and how their brains operate... their job is literally just car 🏎

also another thing is how people talk about 814 always twinning but what adds even more dimension to it is basically oscar admitting and being conscious of his mirroring lando's expressions 😭 and the fact that he's always choosing him for interview questions/copying his answers during games! like i think it's sooo compelling that oscar unintentionally latched onto lando as a young teenager in the uk and never really strayed from that because you have a very expressive, larger-than-life lando who is prone to being misrepresented because people don't really understand the manifestation of adhd and then level-headed oscar who is also poorly read because he doesn't express himself "conventionally" taking one look at lando and being like Hmmm yes. i'll mold myself after that. and lando being so happy and open to that dynamic 🧡 does it not move u

[velvetvexations]

apologies, but i'm about to use your inbox as a dumping ground, because i cannot STAND this idea that trans women are uniquely susceptible to "social murder" and that trans m&ms are uniquely capable of perpetrating it

in college, i was a part of a big queer group. at the time i was pre-everything, but openly identifying as nonbinary, and visibly afab. there were about 20 of us in this group, all around the same age (18-22), and a solid mix of genders and expressions. i'd say there was a roughly even spread of genders and gendered experiences, not substantially more of one than another.

at first, everything was great! i had a ton of friends! sure, they socially ostracised a (cis!!) girl, and made it a point to make a second group chat without her in it, and avoided her....but hey, that's justified, she's annoying, whatever. (aside: as a grown adult, i know now how big of a red flag that is, and it'd send me running in the other direction nowadays.) the fact that she was neurodivergent and asexual was probably irrelevant.

once she was gone from the group, they picked someone else. this person was genderfluid, also autistic and asexual. they did the same thing to her, froze her out until she stopped trying.

she was gone, they picked another. cis gay guy, also neurodivergent. outright threw him out of his dorm room because he had the audacity to have sex when his roommates were on vacation.

i was the next one (for the record.......also neurodivergent, also asexual). and i have to say, bullying when it's the group you've built your social circle around, and when they're people you LIVE with.......it's really, really rough. i had a roommate watch me develop an eating disorder and tell me to my face that i was "appropriating fat struggles." i had people follow me to where i was eating breakfast and make thinly veiled threats from right behind me. they talked to my professors about me; the rumours were so vitriolic that i was kicked from a class outright. there was an entire DEPARTMENT i could no longer take classes in safely. i struggle with all of that to this day, almost a decade later, and i have never received an apology from anyone.

you know who did that? cis people, men and women. trans people, men and women. nonbinary people of all stripes. to me, a "tme" or whatever.

"social murder" is always a possibility when your social circle is necessarily small; it's weird to pretend that queer friend groups never blow up spectacularly, or that the fallout isn't particularly damaging when your other options for friends are limited by who doesn't hate you on principle. but to act like it's along GENDERED lines exclusively, or that it's always worse when it's a trans woman, ignores all other intersections (when in my own experience, it's been neurodivergence and disability that have contributed more to "social murder" in queer friend groups than any identity) and is just.....not just cruel, but maliciously ignorant.

I'm so very, very sorry that happened to you anon. <3 I love you.

[pinbones]

There's two types of people who use transandrophobia to decribe transmascs' and trans mens' experiences:

- Simply specificity, language used to hone in on a specific way being trans affects people who just happen to be men

- As both the above and as a springboard to discuss how societal misogyny, radical feminism, gender stereotypes, and bioessentalism affect all people who can be pecieved as men or masculine by others, and how bigotries compound in meaningful ways with stereotypes and bigotry surrounding maleness and manhood

Like. Half of you are saying "maleness is a hollow experience which is standard, and exists in opposition to gendered oppression, and transandrophobia is therefore when dudes experience misogyny and transphobia"

and half of you are saying "Being percieved and/or transitioning towards male uniquely affects how I am treated, because, for example, how people perceive my blackness or mental illness or kinkiness or femininity is compounded with my manhood in ways that don't usually happen to gender conforming cisperi women"

Which are two fundamentally different approaches to transandrophobia as a concept. One suggests that maleness is a simple downy layer of privilege that coats a person through their male life, and the other acknowledges that a man (or somebody perceived as masculine/male) can experience oppression in ways that those NOT perceived male may not.

Only one of these interpretations is intersectional. Black individuals who are policed more hashly when interpreted as masc know they are risking dangerous experiences when transitioning to male, as has been discussed before on here (to no avail). Male or percieved male people with personality disorders are treated as more dangerous than women with similar symptoms, and are sometiems diagnosed with different disorders entirely based on percieved gender differences. This affects transmascs too, especially considering the already dire state of queerness in psychiatric institutions. Being a male birthing parent is a whole shitshow of transphobia because men are not supposed to give birth, and transmascs are lucky to access related healthcare at all, let alone access it without being ceaselessly misgendered and treated as a stigmatised 'other' to deleterious affects on parent and baby. These are just a few examples, there are many more ways maleness can screw a person over. And that's not to say that female privilege is a thing instead of male privilege, but rather to emphasise that men are not supposed to be minorities. Men are not supposed to be assaulted, men are not supposed to be outliers, men are absolutely not supposed to be trans.

When a man is autistic, he's not just autistic, he's an autistic male, and that makes him more likely to be killed by cops (especially if black). When someone says "you claim you're not ableist but you're scared of the homeless x on a bus talking to xself", they always say the person is a man, because that sounds more significant (and cops think so too). Consider when a person's rape/abuse is considered to not be all that serious due to the victim being male, or when a man's attraction is considered to be more exploitative than a woman's, or when a fat man is considered more creepy/sexist than a thin man or a fat woman. Consider why so many caricatures of evil and creepiness are men with deformities. Consider the fact that men's bathrooms don't have baby changing tables, and that a man may get less support from others after their child's death than the mother might. Maleness can negatively compound with things like minority status, vulnerability, aggression, sexuality, etc. in ways that screw that person over, both in social spaces (such as queer communities that dislike/distrust maleness and masculinity, or how isolation affects men harder), and in more tangible ways, like their rates of suicide and being murdered.

There are tangible ways in which transitioning to male can negatively affect a person's life even if you remove (hypothetically, not really possible) the transphobia element, and these also constitute as worthwhile topics of discussion. If you think maleness is the lack of gendered oppression, then you're not intersectional in your feminism at all. If your life as a male is genuinely sunshine and rainbows (apart from the transphobia if trans), then good for you, genuinely that's great, but not everyone lives in a radfem fantasy world.

Being unable to tell the difference between men talking about mens issues/liberation, and right wingers talking about oppressing women more, isn't feminist. It's ignorant and antifeminist. (MRAs don't care about actual mens lib, and are actively worsening it because they are sexist and opposed to gender lib. You guys know that, right? That male and female liberation aren't oppositional or binary, but the same gender liberation that is entirely oppositional to patriarchy?)

These men and mascs talking about issues facing men aren't ignorant womanhaters who deny misogyny and want ultraprivileged men to be coddled, they are good faith members of your community with experiences just as varied and valid as yours. Treat them like it.

[cyberkamis]

i think the reason rui smiles like :3 instead of :) like a normal fucking person is because when he was a kid he always needed to smile for photos but his autistic ass didn't know how to do that properly so he did his little autism smile which just so happens to make him :3 and at some point he accidentally unlearnt how to smile and now his normal smile is :3

[sol-consort]

Easy to forget that Jaal IS living his fantasy of "hot aliens come knocking at your door to whisk you away on space adventures in their technologically advanced alien ship"

Like we're the aliens this time around, coming to his home planet, getting him on a spaceship with a variety of hot aliens. In a single day, Jaal's life took a turn for the harem anime protagonist road.

This is a full on monsterfucking fetish to him, we are the monsters he wants to fuck.

And he's an alien enthusiast. He was writing "alien x reader" on angaran Wattpad since he was a teen.

[vaguely-concerned]

lucanis truly has a near terminal case of burned out golden child syndrome. caterina fucked both of these kids over so incredibly bad with the dynamic she enforced there, with illario being labled the perpetual fuckup kid where lucanis 'could do no (would never be allowed to do) wrong'. the way he admits in the first coffee date scene that the only thing that happened when he showed he could carry the weight of expectation was that more weight was added makes me so sad. you can hear it in caterina's voice in his intro mission that she's incredibly proud of him, but this is clearly a leandra and hawke situation where that pride never translates into relief or resolution or unconditional warmth or understanding or anything that really helps.

[imkazz]

saiki k is a golden anime.

i finished season 1 just now and. i have feelings. copy pasted from discord as a ranting to @peapodsinspace but i have to recommend the anime now.

i feel like the genre is comedy anime but. there are a lot of dark undertones to it. this is a teenage boy and he has to suffer every single day for powers he doesnt want. it impacts his everyday life and all he wants is to be normal but he doesnt know what normal is despite it being right in his face.

he pushes these people away but they continue coming after him. like real friends. normal friends.

they think of him and like him no matter what he does or acts or anything and. he loves them right back. he does things for them and they try to do things despite the fact that it typically goes wrong or he knows what theyre doing. he doesnt even care that he doesnt get acknowledgement because he doesnt want it.

so like.. i have to mention his friends. kusuo gives them grief constantly. always dissing them, always using their thoughts against them (such as teruhashi and her dislike for kids and bowling). because he can hear them. saiki kusuo not only gets his ideas about them from how they act and what they say, but also by what they think and that is a huge teller because they dont think anyone is listening. this is a private space that kusuo cannot even escape from whether he wants it or not and he is forced to hear and see whatever they think. ive joked about how he is always in gossip but. he literally cannot get out of it because he is such a kind person, that he wants to help.

and he gets to see all sides of them whether they show it or think it. kaidos letter. kaido defending yumeharu. hairos determination. yumeharus dedication. teruhashi and her utility of her own abilities. nendo with his mom and job and how he threw away millions of yen to save a drowning kid. kusuo is always there to see any part of that, and he gets a more in depth experience while choosing friends. should i mention that all those examples are things that kusuo didnt use his powers to observe? they were all things that he used his normal senses to find out or watch or overhear. it is very important to both kusuo himself along with the audience that he didnt use his powers to watch them be themselves and nice in all those situations as a normal teenager.

and i find it important that over time, and these experiences cumulate, that he slowly figures out that these are good, genuine people. sure they can be weird or perverted or cunning, but at the end of the day, they care about him and it only comes out so blatantly when they plan a surprise party specifically for him.

because many of us (hopefully) have wondered. what is inside our friends minds? and saiki has the answer. and he can see that they mean well. he may not understand most people and their emotions, but he knows some basics. and perhaps that could be enough to get him to live normally.

not to mention kuniharu and his convo with kusuo... despite some of the grief i give the man for constantly demanding his son do things for him, he knows his kid well. that convo is totally the pinnacle of their entire relationship, kusuos feelings, his friends.

kusuo mentioned that he doesnt tell his parents about new powers in fear they will demand more things and become lazy but. they care about him and know him. they understand his aversion to friends and know when to help him out or to push him to be around them.

he aided in that surprise birthday party but he also encouraged kusuo to go to his party that his friends threw for him. and he overhears that conversation without his telekinesis. because they actually know him and they all agree upon it. its not as in he is looking into their minds. he hears them through the door.

so he cant come to the conclusion that it was just a private thought that nobody wanted to voice aloud. no, they all agreed upon it. and they all verbally agreed to be nicer. just as his dad had said they would

it was weird seeing saiki kusuo smiling like that because he isnt one to do that and his friends know him well enough to know that (despite the fact kusuo avoids them!!) and they can all agree. they were all very happy to see kusuo smiling but they knew it jsut wasnt right

every time that kuniharu sneaks off to meet with the real saiki k they want, he is always trying to get kusuo to join them as himself

he is always encouraging his son to go hang out with his friends and he is still ready to go along with what kusuo wants. he was probably ready to go back to them after that last convo if kusuo still declined. but his words definitely got to kusuo because there arent that many people in the world who can understand kusuo so well

i know ive made fun of this but everyone around him sees him all wrong in their minds. they see the damsel in distress eyes or the idiot circle eyes. they hear a high pitch and weak voice. but not his parents. kusuos dad actually knows who he is and accepts him and loves him and encourages him to live out his dream of being normal by telling kusuo about what being normal is really like. to have friends who love you and go out of their way to try and make your day. kuniharu has to 'lecture' kusuo in order to get him to understand that the reason he was staying away was not because the classmates were 'bullying' or 'being annoying' from the kindness and love of their own decisions. it was because kusuo was scared of hurting them or disappointing them or even for them to abandon him.

and of course, that is a very common teenage feeling!! the fear of disappointing your friends- of course its normal!! saiki kusuo is a normal kid with not so normal powers attached to him.

[iridiss]

something something about autism masking and how it relates to Mystreet Garroth’s character development. something about how Mystreet Aphmau “Has Never Masked Her Chaotic Audhd Once In Her Life” McGee influences Garroth to crawl out of his posh boy shell and goof off and run wild

[thefrogdalorian]

I think on this fine Saturday afternoon it's a good opportunity to take a breather and remember that there are really no ethical paparazzi pictures. Every single one is inherently exploitative.

Just because photos were taken on a movie set, when someone is 'working,' does not make the practice any less invasive and creepy. Imagine just going about your day, doing your job and having some weirdo snapping pictures of you to sell without your consent for others to endlessly repost online.

There are thousands of pictures of your favourite actor online already. Plenty taken with his knowledge and consent. I'd really like to see more of them on my dash, rather than the creeper shots.

And don't get me started how disseminating these pictures directly leads to people going to said sets. What starts off as admiring how good someone looks has real world implications.

No, hanging around a movie set and disrupting people doing their jobs is not harmless fun or a way to show your appreciation.

If you hang around a movie set, you are a stalker.

Don't tell me that it's okay to take your online admiration for someone offline. You may admire him but he does not, and will never, personally know you. He will never be your friend/boyfriend/daddy. He is a stranger.

The only way meeting your favourite actor is going to happen is at a convention or maaaaaybe a movie premiere if you're incredibly fortunate. You know, places they appear specifically to meet fans (or not in the case of premieres, where the purpose is to promote a movie. Which is also completely understandable if actors don't stop. You are not owed an interaction).

Of course, you cannot help it if you randomly run into someone you admire in the wild. Even then, consider that they probably won't be all too thrilled to be approached in public by a complete stranger. It's up to you to gauge the situation, but remember there is a person at the heart of all of this.

Boundaries and respect are a kindness which deserves to be extended to each and every human being regardless of their looks/talent/fame/wealth.

Fandoms blur those lines a little too often for my liking and I think just scrutinising what you're interacting with, or what behaviour you could be possibly falling down that slippery slope towards is nice to do every once in a while.

I mean no malice with this post and it is not directed at anyone in particular. It's something I cannot help but feel strongly about because I've seen this destructive cycle time and again in fandoms over the years. It's not healthy and it makes us all a little bit more disconnected from our humanity for it...

[nyupuun]

my truth

[naivety]

okay i need feedback from the autism mentall illness website um. this is going to read like an AITA post. brother vs half-sister (who are currently my dependents do to their own individual disabilities + ptsd/depression) spat i will skim the details on but i'm worried my sister will discount my take since i'm not autistic myself so. am i crazy to call it ableist to look at an autistic person (23) who is clearly going through it dealing w long term depression, a world that doesn't give a shit abt him, unemployment, very self-isolated and burnt out barely leaving his room because the world is an ableist dumpster fire with zero opportunities for him, and then bring up childhood abuse he's suffered and his diagnosis as reasonable factors on top of this to worry he'll [checks notes] abuse my cat just to hurt me or even worse have a breakdown and kill me and his other sibling in a violent episode, a train of thought i probably wouldn't even be having were he not [checks notes] mad at me for the first time in my life?

like i don't have any other read on this kind of fear-based characterization other than ableism. like those are very real things in his life but she never points out any current violent behavior, of which there are none, only the one (1) instance of him lashing out when he was like 14 and Officially Diagnosed Low Empathy she thinks is a concern and Hateful Looks toward her since he stopped getting along with her, that's it. i tried explaining to her why i, someone who's lived w him his entire life, can vouch for how unlikely he is to do anything like that, especially when it's again not based on anything he's actually currently doing except for isolating in a way that is much more indicative of him potentially being a danger to himself than anyone else, and being cold towards her specifically, and i thought she had let it go, but when i brought it up off-hand in a conversation tangentially related, she continued to defend and justify her Concern about the potential directions his behavior could lead to because [checks notes] other people in similar situations have lashed out and killed their entire families according to. true crime books or videos she's watched on youtube as far as i'm aware. ignoring the fact that her and i have had the same or Worse childhood abuse and have acted similarly isolated in the past, or for her literally just as currently as him, and she's not expressed any worry past or present about either of us doing anything like that, in my opinion obviously because i haven't cut her off due to our differences like he decided to. like am i big sibling biased because this is pissing me off so bad.

[woobifykamukura]

ghdsfkjghdsf is that a common thing?

I don't really get how he'd be misdiagnosed anyway; it would need brain scans, especially since it's so rare at his age, and if anything it would have been misdiagnosed as other conditions for a while. Only going off cry-stars here- I have no expertise myself- but she's said that can happen and there was a recent case in Japan where a young guy's dementia was mistaken for depression for ages.

If we doubt Komaeda's FTD it can only be via doubting his honesty imo (but I still think he's telling the truth). I also love seeing analyses of him through the lenses of other disorders as comorbid instead of alternative diagnoses- especially autism, but I've seen interesting takes wrt OCD and BPD too- but canonically I feel like bvFTD, extreme post-traumatic stress and political radicalisation adequately explain his issues.

TO BE FAIR it probably isnt As common as i think it is, i just saw one reddit post thst explicitly claimed the FTD was a misdiagnosis and that it totally makes way more sense for komaeda to have autism and bpd, and a surprisung number of people... agreed? for some reason??

which i need to state for the record a) i am autistic myself and b) have absolutely zero problems with headcanons, even if they arent ones i ascribe to personally

what i DO have a problem with is people erasing canon neurodivergencies and/or erasing traits CENTRAL to a character in order to square-peg-round-hole the headcanon THEY have as the most correct one

"nagito has ftd and was autistic before that?" cool! neat! seeing how those two disorders being comorbid with each other could be really interesting!

"nagito does NOT have ftd, the devs were wrong, they actually wrote an autistic character and didnt realize it" stop talking.

this is very like, misanthropic i guess but after SO MUCH SHIT ive seen it just speaks to an unwillingness to empathize with or relate to anyone that isnt exactly like you. and you cant just headcanon real people around you with Misdiagnosed Autistic (most.... times....) so this pops up in fiction

like. i am autistic! i also have two (2) personality disorders, and neither is bpd. this has led to a non negligible amount of autistic people completely stereotyping my other disorders as evil in order to prop themselves up ("i thought i was a narcissist/sociopath, which wouldve been awful, but really i was just autistic! phew!!" with implicit, sometimes EXPLICIT value judgements being made)

i have had a friend i had in real life, to my face, say he didn't believe i had either personality disorder and really i was secretly just autistic

...if we had been better friends, maybe he would've known me well enough to know that that's almost... comically untrue. lol

so in my opinion there do exist a certain minority of autistic people who see autism as the only neurodivergency that Matters, or at least the one that matters the most. and the only way they can feel any sympathy for anyone else is if they are also autistic

and i know this is a minority! and i just see it a lot because i am an autist in fandom and a lot of other autistic people are also in fandom! AND that this is a mindset prone to ANY minority- most people think their Problem is the Worst Problem, it just... happens. however i am just as irrational and prone to biases as anyone else and ive chosen this as my completely irrelevant hill to die on

that one reddit post made me so goddamn mad bc of All This PLUS its double insulting when someone says "i have a special interest in psychology!" as a way to say theyre extremely knowledgable, and doing genuine analysis with the lens of "i am looking at the text and trying to make an objective diagnosis" and then STILL DO THIS!!! because they have this veneer of "im just a guy asking questions" before diving right into a weirdly consspiratory subset of "everyones an idiot about mental health except for ME"

...which tbf i dont think that about myself. i am very good at writing a wide variety of mental illness due to a combination of research and life experience BUT i could really only tell you like. actual non-surface level FACTS about aspd and to a lesser extent, npd. because thats what i chose to focus on. there are far and away lots more people that know more about me about other things, and im fine wit that

i am however also aware of this extremely hyperspecific social phenominon. and thus it is my burden to bear. my mountainous molehill.

also r/danganronpa just fucking sucks like in general. every time i see a kokichi opinion there i get a little closer to pulling the trigger. i think the real moral here is reddit is garbage and should not be used for anything other than product reviews

(also fwiw i agree w ur personal take at the end, with a lil bit of ocd tendencies that like, started off manageable and nowhere near diagnostic level badness, since things he might do to manage his cycle and even the constant thinking about it are very much reminiscent of obsessions and compulsions. but ftd in of itself can cause ocd symptoms so after that it got... worse. thats my personal take on it ^^)

[stellewriites]

really fucking grinds my gears how my dad knows just how to make me feel fucking guilty for putting up boundaries and saying no

[an-evil-tomato]

The hermits: omg etho he's so cool and mysterious wow

Me, watching etho for the first time: oh this man just has autism

[autistic-beshelar]

ah yes dungeon meshi, the manga where an autistic man gets repeatedly bullied by people he thinks are his friends and not a single person supports him