#health issues again

[mewguca]

POTS is acting up again so I project on my fave to cope once again

(it's my fault for not taking care of my health properly but hyperventilating because I decided to Stand Up And Walk is still rather annoying and unpleasant)

[sunfoxfic]

We were so close to smoking not being cool anymore. We were so close. Then they flavored it mango and now it's taboo to criticize it anymore. People don't ask if they're allowed to vape indoors, they aren't considerate of people who may have health problems that are triggered by the chemicals or if it just bothers them, people don't care that they're supporting an industry built on corruption and greed, they can't see it draining their pockets and much less their health. We were so close to smoking not being cool anymore.

[bigfatbreak]

"yea I was up late last night"

[canisalbus]

.

[dhwty-writes]

I cast Spiritual Weapon!

I have noticed that I've never really drawn the CR ladies before, so here's everyone's favorite blue tiefling, Jester! Enjoy!

[suhnshinehaos]

my heart dropped when i read the statement that sm put out re: taeil, genuinely the last thing i expected to read today. i’m shocked, disappointed, but most of all- i’m angry.

angry at what he’s done, angry at seeing some fans defend him, angry at those turning this into a gotcha moment to promote or lift their faves up. please, this isn’t just some discussion on the internet- there is a very real victim, a very real woman at the heart of all this. i hope she gets the justice and healing she deserves.

[iliothermia]

Anons are off because I'm done with people lying in my inbox, insulting me, and just piling on. I am one person who is trying to deal with hatred from multiple sides but those sending these messages see themselves as just one person throwing in their opinion because you can't see the other 15 messages I get insulting me for the same thing. I feel like I've been clear about my stance and why I function how I do in my small space online. If you find issue with how I function then please just unfollow me and leave me alone. I'll be offline for a while but I appreciate everyone who's sent me caring messages and things to consider a lot. I'm genuinely disappointed though, that this all comes from me saying I love my Jewish community and I hope they're doing okay- My first message directed at supporting other Jews I've made, after months of reaffirming my care for Palestine. Stay safe yall.

[tinyghostarts]

Been seeing a lot of people online forgetting (or ignoring) that Sam Manson is canonly Jewish despite the show confirming this in episodes such as The Fright Before Christmas (Sam and her family celebrate Hanukkah), Control Freaks (her grandmother's nickname for her is Yiddish), as well as Life Lessons ('Lilith' is the name of a demon in Jewish mythology)

So here's a reminder that Sam Manson is canonly Jewish

[jinxed-sinner]

Look I know Lucifer isn't the best dad ever but I feel like people who say he's a bad dad are purposely ignoring the context of the show. It is very much implied that he thought Charlie wanted nothing to do with him, and Charlie thought he wanted nothing to do with her. Lucifer’s still dealing with trauma from Heaven and his fall and probably will for the rest of time plus he's dealing with what would probably qualify as clinical depression, and simultaneously dealing with trauma, clinical depression, and autistic traits (which Lucifer absolutely has; I do not say, as an autistic person, that Lucifer is a massive autistic mood for no reason) is a fucking NIGHTMARE.

I'm not saying Lucifer shouldn't take responsibility. He should. But he's already doing better than my dad frankly. Lucifer hits me in the daddy issues, I wish my dad made an effort to be more active in my life. Lucifer is fucking trying, and that's better than a lot of people can say about their dads.

[spop-romanticizes-abuse]

can we stop the trend of putting traumatized and mentally unstable characters into romantic relationships as their “happy endings”?

[lunabug2004]

Something I've noticed recently is the difference in which people notice or think/talk about Nancy and Mike's survivor's guilt.

People seem to be much more open to the notion of Nancy having survivor's guilt, also they tend to pick up on it easier, and I think the reason for this Nancy actually kinda demonstrates herself in s2, when talking to Jonathan when she says "Yeah, but it's different for you. Will came home."

Now, Mike feels survivor's guilt in connection to both Will and El, and Nancy for Barb, and the difference between them is that both Will and El actually survive. But the thing that people tend to forget is that Mike saw Will's "dead body", he saw El disappear in front of his own eyes just to not hear from her for almost a year, he saw his best friend's body and mind be taken over by a terrifying monster (who he had just told he wouldn't let happen to him a day or so before). So, yes, El and Will may not be dead, but in any case, esp in Mike's 11-14 year old brain, that doesn't really mean much at all. Mental illnesses don't go away just because the thing that caused them did. I mean, that's legitimately what PTSD is!

Talking about s2 specifically for example, even at the beginning of the season, most of the GA already knew that El was still alive, but knew for sure that Barb was dead. The show parallels Nancy and Mike in ep 1, with Nancy crying in Barb's house and Mike looking terribly upset while boxing up toys in his basement. Despite this parallel though, most people I've watched only pick up on Nancy's survivor's guilt. Even though Mike goes on to try and contact El, who he still (mostly) believes is dead, lots of people just go "aw that's sad" or "aw that's sweet" and move on.

Idk if it's just because he's younger, or that, as I said before, the audience knows El is still alive, but it's always seemed to me that people don't take Mike's mental health problems as seriously as they take Nancy's when really, they're in a very similar boat.

[kinokoshoujoart]

scribbles based on my Another Wonderful Life file where i discovered Rock and Nami showing up together at Vesta’s farmhouse late at night on multiple occasions to cause various types of chaos and disturbance and havoc until Marlin and Vesta’s bedtime (which they both announce in unison to kick everyone out) this included

Rock levitating and attempting to rizz up vesta

Nami making a beeline for Celia’s room where she stands around making very subtle remarks (celia isn’t even in her room)

Marlin Enduring

haunting crime scene photos of the shenanigans:

[kryptonbabe]

There's this moment in Young Justice #1 in which Red Tornado compares Impulse, Superboy and Robin to Id, Ego and Superego respectively and first I thought - nice parallel, that is actually a pretty smart and insightful way to look at these characters, particularly on their first solo issue... Then the next panel comes with Superboy's conclusion and...

This is the silliest comic book I've read in a while and I read silver age comics pretty often... you just can't take this seriously and it's lovely for that

Although I'm already a fan of Peter David, the writer of this series, ever since I read his X-Factor books at Marvel, I was still expecting Young Justice to be at least a little bit overrated (due to the absurd popularity of the main characters), but I'm having fun so far, this makes me laugh way more than I thought it would, the hype is real...

It's not a perfect series, nothing ever is and writers really seemed to struggle with what to do with women in these 90s titles (at least for now, in my experience), but still, Peter David writes the goofiest dialogues, smart word plays (and makes surprisingly accurate scientific references, which I do love to read in comics), and it's not without emotional sensibilities too, although the main focus is the lighthearted action and dynamics (for now)

I just wanted to write a little update and register these impressions!

From the first two issues of Young Justice (1998) by Peter David and Todd Nauck

[passionartx]

A few days ago I got cast as Dorothy in my local theatre company’s production of The Wizard Of Oz and I just know this means I’m gonna be hyperfixating on @whotfletamothhyperfx’s @sonicwizardofozau 10 times harder! So I decided to draw their AU Tails design + T-Pup

!Defo check their au out if you haven’t already cause ahhh it’s so, so good! The world building, the character designs, the art, the everything!✨!

[balkanradfem]

Health update

I've been writing this post over and over during the last six months, and ultimately I would decide not to publish it, because I didn't have a good resolution for it! I wanted to come here and write – hey I solved it! I've fixed it! Good ending to the story. But instead it's just been crazy time and actually, I'm not in a great place. I don't expect to get any help or advice – at this point I'm convinced that nobody can help me, but, if you wanna hear my crazy infuriating story about the neck pain, click on 'Keep reading'.

So if you've been following me for a while, you'll remember I mentioned some intense pain in my neck, left arm, and left shoulder, that would stop me from walking, sitting, standing, lifting anything heavy. All I could do was lie down, and get around by bike. It happened after I was carrying heavy bags of chestnuts every day, two years ago, and I just didn't realize it could do me any harm, but I was wrong about that.

I've managed to get a MRI after a full year of waiting, and not being able to walk for more than 15 minutes, and the documents said that nothing was wrong with my neck! I was fine, and my doctor and everyone else decided the pain was psychosomatic and I needed to go to a psychiatrist. But I knew that wasn't it! I've been struggling with psychosomatic pain for 10 years at this point and that's not how it works.

My doctor has been giving me vitamins and telling me it's a vitamin D deficiency, and not knowing what else to do, I humored her and took vitamins. I've been trying all kinds of exercises I would find online, which were all extremely painful for me to do, and took days of recovery, until finally, one exercise worked and moved the pain away from my neck. It was now in my head, so if I tried to walk, or sit, or lean back while sitting down – my head would experience waves of pain. If I persisted, then I would end up in bed, paralyzed in pain for days. But I could now lift stuff with my right arm, and I was so relieved to be even a little bit better, not having that constant pain in my neck was a blessing. When I told this to my doctor, she decided that 'pain went away on its own', which I tried to debate but she didn't listen.

Afterwards I tried going to a private physiotherapist, to see if I could get at least any more information, and I was scheduled for a treatment of massage, electrotherapy, ultrasound therapy and traction. When they did traction, I felt something move directly in the place where the pain was, I was shocked! Next few days I could actually sit normally, and I thought I was saved – but then I made one wrong move with my left arm, and the pain came right back, devastating me. I went again, thinking maybe the second time will fix me, and asked about what traction usually solves – I was told it was a nerve impingement. But the doctors said I didn't have it, because it didn't show up on scans, and I didn't have pins and needles in my fingers.

However I did suspect I still somehow had an impinged nerve. My second attempt at physiotherapy did not work, but I now had more information – traction on my neck definitely helped the first time. The exercise that helped my neck previously, was also traction! Traction is basically stretching out your body in a way that your head, or one of your limbs is being pulled away from the body. And I wanted to try it on my left arm, which was at that point, almost completely unusable; not only it was so weak it couldn't pull a power cord out of an outlet, but it would hurt severely if I tried to lift even a bowl. I found instructions online on how to do traction on my shoulder at home, did it DIY style, and – my left arm gained power back. It was still painful to lift heavier things, it was still not 100% usable, but I could lift a bowl and pull out a cord with it. 60% of its problems were resolved, in about 10 minutes. I was both relieved and angry. To think something so simple could resolve so many symptoms and nobody even thought to mention it for me to try? It was devastating. At that point my left arm was unusable for a year and a half.

Another thing happened after I freed my left arm – I started experiencing extreme pins and needles, not only in my fingertips, but even at the top of my head. I now had all symptoms of nerve impingement. I realized later, that I had pins and needles the entire time, but failed to register or notice, because I had them for the last 10 year because my blood pressure is so low, all of my limbs are numb at all times. I thought some base level of pins and needles is normal and didn't think to report it as a symptom.

So with this new knowledge, I went to my doctor and explained that I could still have an impinged nerve, but nobody caught it because I failed to report the tingles, because I thought they were normal, and nobody asked me about blood pressure. I still couldn't walk, or sit, or stand or carry heavy stuff. So she redirected me to a private physician who dealt specifically with nerve impingement, he was expensive but he could fix it.

So I went.

The guy didn't want to hear me out, but immediately asked for the MRI, which I gave to him dejectedly, because I was told they show nothing. He looked at it for 2 minutes and located the impinged nerve. It was between my 6th and 7th vertebrae, trapped inside of my spine. He showed me on a toy how the nerve gets compressed every time I sit, stand, walk, or lift anything heavy, and how any of these motions would send horrible waves of pain trough my body.

I was blank with shock. There was clear evidence of nerve impingement on my MRI scans, but the documents said everything was alright? I asked why didn't the doctors at the hospital catch this, and he said they just don't look at it in such detail. He reassured me he has a painless therapy that can resolve this issue in a few weeks and that I don't have to be worried about it. It was expensive but I had been at this point, saving money and desperate to the point of being willing to give up my savings just to get free of pain – the pain was destroying my will to live.

I'm going to warn you that this is where things will take a bad turn, and just writing this down makes me mad.

The therapy was not painless. It was electric therapy first, then I would be put on a machine that pulls my head away from my body, but at an angle that was extremely painful to me. Then they would put me to lie with my head pushed forward, another angle that hurt me so much I was slowly starting to sob while it was happening. At one point I nervously said I had a question, and was immediately shut down with 'you can ask later', by that same guy. I was told it would hurt for the next few days but then it would get better. I'm used to pain but I had to take pain medicine as soon as I got home. It was unbearable.

After the second therapy, the pain got worse to the point where I was completely bed-bound. I was struggling to do my job, had to take breaks to lie down on the floor every half an hour. The pain was worse than it was in the start – my neck hurt again, I couldn't use my left arm, I even developed new symptoms of pain while walking, pain I've never experienced before! Feeling panicked and worried, I called them to report my awful condition, because they had a rule that if you don't come to therapy, and you don't cancel it the day before, you have to pay as if it happened. So I called, and I told them my symptoms were getting much worse, asking if I should still come to therapy as scheduled, thinking we would maybe try something else since this didn't work?

And I got told... god I need to calm down, this is still insane to me. I got told 'okay don't come anymore'. And that was it. They were like 'we can't help you anymore don't come bye'. I remember just pure panic and dread hearing that, I understood they were getting rid of me because the therapy didn't work. In desperation, I later called again and asked if I could schedule another appointment because I was in so much pain, and they said 'in 6 weeks, and then you can only have another every 6 weeks and no sooner'.

I thought at first, okay, I'll wait for 6 weeks. I need help. But two weeks later I realized there's no use. The therapy put me in a state much worse than initial, how could I go back for more of that? And these people were completely apathetic. I lost all of that money, only to have my state worsen to the point where I would start crying from how much it hurt. I was breaking down.

Eventually I came to my limit of how much I can endure and I decided to go forward with a back-burner plan I had devised in my head, but didn't go trough with before, because it was a little insane. I knew now how the traction machine worked, and I knew that traction in the past, would help me, and this one didn't because the head-forward angle was just catastrophic. So I decided to diy it. Make my own contraception that would do the exact thing but at an angle I felt comfortable with. Is that smart? Is it not experimenting on myself when I'm already in such horrible state? Well. That's what it is. But at least I won't do as horrid of a job as those 'private professionals' who did this to me.

So! The pain is not resolved. My own efforts are ongoing, it's kinda painful, I'm hacking it, trying to figure out the correct intensity, angle, and all other stuff, trying not to think about how insane I feel trying to diy something as serious as this, but listen. I need hope. I have nobody left who could help me. Doing nothing is sending me spiraling. I need to be trying stuff out, and everything that has helped me to this point, have been my little diy, learned-from-internet tricks. Maybe it will work, maybe I'll learn something. But I need hope. I know the healthcare system cannot help me because they documented there's nothing wrong with me and I can't disprove it. And I am so sad.

I had to give up all of my hobbies, my crafts, I couldn't go on with weaving or knitting, I barely did any sewing, gardening became painful and I can only do it in small increments. If I don't resolve this, I won't be able to live my life, I won't be able to build anything. All my dreams will fail.

Oh and if you're wondering how was I still able to forage in the forest if I can't walk – I hacked it. I can walk for 10 minutes, but then I have to lie down. And in a forest, I just can lie down anywhere. So I would walk for 10 minutes, then lie on the forest ground, just look at the trees and the birds for 10 minutes, so pain would go away and I'd be able to walk a little again! And forest has soft mossy composted leaves ground that didn't trigger the pain so badly, if the impact of walking is gentle, then I can walk a little bit longer.

I stopped talking about this issue because the mere thought of it can make me hopeless and depressed, I was avoiding thinking about it, or talking about it, to not make myself upset. I sometimes managed to forget about just endlessly playing stardew valley and pretending things are fine. And I thought it would get resolved by now, I was so hopeful that the therapy would help. I had all of my knitting supplies ready, I had collected some new dandelion stems to make baskets of, I was so excited. But I'll just have to hold off on everything, hopefully not indefinitely. Isn't it crazy that I've now had a nerve trapped inside of my spine, sending pain trough my body for 2 years? And I only found out in the last 4 weeks but then it was immediately made worse? Insane stuff. Life isn't supposed to be like this. I don't think anyone was meant to deal with crazy stuff like that.

[hamletshoeratio]

Can y'all just be you know normal Marina Thompson for like 5 seconds? Because christ, the sheer Misogynoir that some of you spread about her character is insane and you don't even realise it.