#he's actually too autistic to care about gender

[juney-blues]

any time a transfem audience takes interest in a character, there is an immediate backlash to any transfeminine interpretations of that character. Suddenly it becomes popular to interpret them as trans in literally any other way than transfem.

while it's not *uncommon* to see an audience call a character an agender any pronouns genderfuck, you see it a lot more the second someone goes "but what if she was a girl"

[waywardsalt]

i have planned to write a pseudo-essay or some kind of detailed look at linebeck in phantom hourglass and how he can be interpreted as autistic but thats not going very well right now so here are some autistic linebeck headcanons

He has low empathy and as such has a hard time responding very well to emotional situations, but he can take advantage of his lower empathy in situations where empathy could make things harder, like tending to wounds or rationally handling emotionally-charged situations

His coat is a comfort object and he made it specifically to act as a very slight accommodation; it’s heavy and barely lets any light through it, and he can keep all kinds of little things in pockets sewn into the inner lining, but larger objects do make it more uncomfortable to wear at times. It’s mostly good to carry around things to fidget or stim with and can be helpful in trying to recover from overwhelming sensory experiences

He doesn’t usually stim in public, but taps his fingers on tables quickly and tends to rhythmically snap his fingers when excited, and on his ship is more vocal and more willing to stim, even if around others. One of his main stims that he’ll do for no particular reason is that he’ll hold his arm or back of his wrist/hand up to his nose and mouth for the smell.

He masks frequently to please people. His default mask is that arrogant and brave front he puts up for islanders and other he may come across. Usually, if that mask doesn’t work, he tends to double-down because it usually works and, in his experience, dropping the mask has usually gone badly (non masking he’s rude and blunt but more outwardly excited about adventure and his ship and all of that, i consider it where overseas in the game is when he usually isn’t masking. this shifts his arc to be about him learning to stop masking and feel comfortable being himself)

His special interests could include stuff related to treasure hunting but it could really range from stuff about adventuring or the ocean or engineering (relating to his ship) to stuff not at all touched in the game like music. He really enjoys music, listening to it, playing it, and writing it. He also enjoys and is fascinated by shellfish.

When busy or otherwise occupied, he doesn't usually notice when he's hungry. He doesn't have as much of a problem noticing thirst or exhaustion, but feeling hunger is a problem for him, and often leads to him going a long time without eating. On the other hand, he doesn't mind eating the same thing repeatedly and is perfectly fine with blander foods, so handling food supplies for when he'll be overseas for a long time is easy for him.

He knows he's autistic, he's known for a pretty long time, and he has books on it; he also knows that Link is autistic, but doesn't say anything about it and instead waits until someone else tells him. Until (and after, I suppose) Link actually learns that he's autistic Linebeck just makes sure to keep note of what accommodations he might need and if there are any textures or tastes or smells he can't stand. He doesn't have much of a problem helping out during sensory overloads, even soon after meeting him. It's more out of understanding how it feels to not have your needs met and a sort of solidarity rather than actual friendship.

[heartshapedcreaturefromcriptoon]

Um... Suar....

On today's list of fandumb fuckery ... @spaaceinvader

Hello turbovirgin that supports projects with actual TERFS on their team despite claiming to be against them, the lackadaisy icon was your first "Red Flag" here but, uh...

You certainly seem to be invading my "Vivziepop Positive Space UWU 🙏" as it were... Gag me!

So why did you just 'like' one of my posts if I'm not welcome? If Vivziepop is the Britney Spears of The Animation Industry, then I'm Kara Fucking Cunntingham Killyoy, bitch! Like, you literally just 'liked' a post where I told y'all to Leave Vivzie Alone, like? Bitch what? You need a screen shot for that too? Like whaaaaaaaat-TAH?! ya' stupid.

And as if Medrano is as bad as She Who Writes behind The Wiznards or, you know... Ze OTHER birdbrain who's work you claim to enjoy so much? Oh, that was rhetorical, don't worry. I'm about to just block you.

No, but I've always really hated the name "Mordecai"... Now delete your blog, put your phone away, go take a long walk behind the rows and get lost. And fuck off so hard that you'll never "interact" with me again thanks. You're not welcome! :D

NOW STEVE? ANDY? FELLAS? PLAY ME OUT ON THIS ONE!

[beevean]

So there was a pretty cringe interview with the author of delicious in dungeon, and out of the deluge of really insensitive questions she provided this incredible quote which I think should sit framed above the writing desk of every single creative individual in the industry

Link here for anyone interested:

I'll be honest, I only read snippets of that interview, but I was honestly disgusted at the fandom's reaction to her saying "Laios is just a normal guy" - basically to insist that if she thinks he is normal and relates to him, then she too is autistic and doesn't know it.

Bro. You don't have the authority to apply headcanons on real people, especially people you only know from interviews and their work. You are being incredibly rude. Laios is certainly quirky, to say the least, and you are allowed to snicker a little at her insistence that he's just an everyman fr fr, but don't get so entrenched in your fanon that you cross boundaries into basically saying "haha we know better than the writer herself :) in fact we know more about herself than she knows :)"

I guess this relates with the quote you put. Kui, like other mangakas, leave to their readers freedom of interpretation, but they have their own plans and ideas and they're sticking to them. Kui probably didn't mean to write an autistic character, but she's leaving to the fandom the choice to see him as such and relate to him that way - which is what she said she intended them to do!

And about Farcille, ngl, had she canonized it purely because it's the flagship of the fandom, she might have risked a Bumbleby/Whispangle situation, where the two become unseparable from each other. It's good that Marcille and Falin are allowed to be their own different people, but with a strong relationship - actually more flawed than usually conceived, although seen mostly in side material (Marcille's adherence to gender norms that Falin doesn't care about). So yeah, hers is a good approach.

[punkeropercyjackson]

Robin!Duke Thomas headcanons/rewrite because i'm in my feelings about him.If you think Duke's not a 'core Batkid' DNI and take your segregation somewhere else

He's the 5th Robin instead of Damian and The Riddler plot still happened but Elaine and Doug got jokerized during it so Bruce adopted Duke way earlier and he was 11 at the time

He is also trans,autistic,femme and afropunk!!2nd and 4th are canon coding but it's explicit here.Egg cracked pre-meeting Bruce so trans Batdad gets trans Batson gender affirming care like puberty blockers and makes sure nobody misgenders him.His Robin suit is Tim's Btas suit for proper repurposing,though it's adjusted from tighties to shorts and the pants/leg parts are ripped and the gloves are fingerless for that alt look

Alfred loves feeding him sweets and Duke always gives him the most adorable star eyes and thanks him because he may be rude but he'll be damned if he's mean to his granddad(his favorite sweets are lemon flavored frosted animal crackers)

He was pretty traumatized by loosing his parents and resisted Bruce's parentage at first due to it but came to embrace it as ultimately he's still a little boy who needs a parent to love and care for him.Bruce's reveal of his own orphan status certainly opted him to give him more of a chance but like a true Batkid,he never stops rebelling despite his unstoppable love for him

He arrives post-Under The Red Hood(movie compliant)but during Batgirl 2000(less racist and gayer)timeline wise so he bonds with Cass,Stephanie and Tim and they invite him on hangouts with 'the big kids' and Young Justice takes in Duke as an honorary little brother similarly to how Traya is treated as their little sister.Stephanie shows Duke all kinds of cool funky/cutesy/edgy things she's into which rub off on him per black siblings bonding and Cass seeks to protect Duke in addition and in thanks to him for teaching her some stuff about 'normalcy',like introducing her to arts and crafts and candy bars.Duke's Batgirl is not Babs,although they do get along-It's Tam and we'll get to that in a bit

Duke employs his powers in his Robin work and it earns him the nickname 'The Robin Signal' in reference to how often he uses his light to guide citizens to safety after him and Bruce take out the danger

His first solo/Year One Run is 'Robin 2007',literally,to distinct from Tim's run that wouldn't end for two more years.They got a crossover mini ofc ofc and it was called 'Robins 2009'

Robin 2007 had 53 issues and featured the introduction of Duke's love interest,albiet her debut as her own character was a good while before it in Aquaman:Luna 'Aquagal' Vásquez!!Luna is the Starfire to Duke's Robin i.e a black non-human girl who's bubbly,soft and princess-y but also extremely hardcore,well-hardend and lowkey mean and his longtime best friend from his sidekick days he's a slowburn perfect MADE soulmateisms couple with!!Their ship name is Thomquez but they're purely platonic until their mid-teens when new feelings ignite and riple into existense.Luna had her own run,Aquagal 2007 <3 Robin/Aquagal:Pals in Disguise was a super cute jumbo issue too!!(Notes:Luna is afro-argentinian,half atlantean half human and has white parts in black hair in a pattern that make her look like she has a constant moonglow halo on her)

Also Duke ships Stephcass so hard😭He was ooo'ing and making cheeky comments as soon as he figured out what was going on when Tim pointed it out to him and NEVER stops until they actually get together,which dosen't happen until Duke-yes,11-12 year old Duke-is an adult.He gives Cass tips on how to rizz up Stephanie after talking to Stephanie to figure out what would work best(turns out Stephanie really likes goth x pastel dynamic images/videos,mocking cheesy flirty memes,whimsical love quotes and X-Ray Spex lyrics)

Duke owns a walkman Tim gifted him and talks into it as a 'Robinlog' and it pops up frequently throught his entire existense as a character as soon as he gets it.Duke is also a big fan of My Chemical Romance,hip hop and disco music,black indie shit,classical literature(canon),video games,writing poetry and 'cutesy' diy(bedazzling,scrapbooking,homemade stickers,etc)!!As he grows up he takes up solarpunk bit by bit and same with glamrock!

Duke got exactly one year as Batman's Robin.On his one year adoption anniversary,him and Bruce had a fight over a case that scared him so bad he thought he was gonna fire him like he'd done to Stephanie so he ran away in the dead of night,straightup out of Gotham City(he was also smart enough to pack an oversized backpack of essentials to carry with him).He was found as the sun set as he tried to sleep in a cat alley with a family of fat calico cats he'd been taking care of on his lap by a 20 year old Jason,his departure taking place during Volume 2 of Red Hood and The Outlaws,a 2010-2020 release 120 issues run that takes place over 3 in-universe years.They have a short conversation that leads to Jason finding out Duke is his brother and combined with knowing he has nowhere else to go at the moment and Summer's(my dcsona)yapping about him thanks to their friendship,takes him with him to The Fortress,The Outlaws' base.Duke joins the team and finally makes friends his age in the other Kid Outlaws(which includes other black kids of all genders!!)but Jason is the member he's closest to

Luna comes in a significant amount of Rhato issues and even enough to be an honorary Kid Outlaw but mostly sticks to Aquafam stuff to avoid reducing her down to Duke's love interest.Duke isn't forced to kill but is a brutalist in his tactics thanks to growing up beating up bullies,Bruce's training and the influences around him and it scares him sometimes so he vents and asks for reassurance and they all gladly give it to him,including Luna,who tells him:'You could never be a monster or evil,Duke.You'll always be my best friend in the ENTIREST MULTIVERSE.And even if you were a monster or evil?I'd save you.You saved me when i didn't know i needed somebody to be heroes with to go on.I'd go there-ANYWHERE! for you too'Least to say,Duke is pretty sure this is the point he started seeing Luna in a different light(a girlfriend light.From 'I need her' to 'I need her to be my babygirl')(in the aave way.don't be weird)

The Kid Outlaws are a bunch of punk ass kids with a thirst for anarchistic justice,the fall of the crime system and extra thick milkshakes.They got the punk drips(including piercings done by the adult Outlaws!!)and everything and call eachother siblings and Duke is their leader despite being the youngest as he's the most capable and suited for the job.The KO includes Thad so they're kinda a 'sparkly sunshine boy/bad but sad boy' buddies duo and their inhereted powers and legacies are a source of bonding along with just liking eachother as people.Duke calls him 'The Thadman' and Thad had no choice but to warm up to it and Thad gets Duke to try out energy drinks with him and they collect trinkets and graffiti public property together and them and Jason are Prime Earth's variant of that picture of three black trans guys who just got their top surgeries all smiling together with bandages on their upper bodies

Duke and Jason are so inseperable.They do soul bounding over soul/dominican food(their 'this and yap' /hj),help eachother with hair care(Duke has a twists out and Jason is a dreadhead),are inside jokes lockout between them and their girlfriends,share a bed more often than not,play Animal Crossing religiously together and even got matching icons in The Outlaws group chat(set to Aang and Zuko because they're literally them!!'If we knew eachother back then,do you think we could have been friends,too?' is how Duke feels about Robin!Jason to Red Hood!Jason,,,,,).Jason loves Duke so fucking much and can't stop himself from doting on him and hyping him up nonstop and encouraging him to stop holding back his rage and impulses and jumping people for him and stealing/diy'ing gifts for him a lot and Duke does the classic 'i make fun of you to show you i think you're the coolest ever and how important you are to me' little brother moves to Jason and is protective of him back as he feels he deserves it after all he's done for him and will eternally do for him,most of all making him feel secure in his Robinhood(ha!!)

All the overexposure to so much and such intense science-y proterties and magic jazz and trazz caused Duke's powers to mutate from just dark and light powers to straight up reality warping(to add onto them-he still has his og power palette,it's too iconic to leave out).He gets stuck in a pocket dimension for a hot sec but Summer and Jason pull him out with Thad's help as an expert on that situation.The universe was trying to create the New 52 but Duke's Robinhood was stopping it so in a 20 issue arc to symbolize the 20 core Outlaws aka the 'Outlawed Robin Arc',even the slimest posibility of the N52 ever happening is erased headfirst headon by our titulary gang!Including Honorary Outlaw for two and a half months at the time Tam aka Batgyal!She awoke from her RR2009 coma and it lead to escapades of adventures with both Tim and Stephanie and she was given her own mantle by Luke,who thought it was about time she joined him officially and was her secret keeper on her vigilante life and sneak offs to reunite with Duke as her initial only motivation

In issue 39,Jason snarks he was just 'The Replacement Robin' and Duke defensively cuts him off with 'You were always my favorite Robin when i was little!I never even got to see you in action but you're my favorite for good now!' and Jason is struck clueless,completely unable to come up with a response but touched beyond words on top of his shock.And in issue 110,Duke sadly says '.........I was never a real Robin.I've been with you guys way longer than i ever was with Bruce-' and Jason cuts him off with 'Yeah,no shit you were never Batman's Robin.You're The Outlaws' Robin-You're my Robin and you always have been and you always will be' and Duke gets extremely teary but does a toothy grin too as they're happy tears so Jason smothers him in a hug in comfort and Duke's face takes up most of the final page and a text box reads on the same one:'Duke Thomas is happy.Jason Todd is happy again,thanks to him.They're eachother's Robin,on purpose and by choice'

When Rhato concludes(and The Outlaws stay in touch forever),Duke comes back to Gotham to discover Damian's now Robin and literally laughs at the ridicilousness of the situation,quipping he's glad he already had a new mantle in mind and offers him a hat he thrifted when they meet,along with a smile and affection in his eyes.Damian snatches it from him,huffy and embarrased over the unexpected warm welcome by him but appreciate it and liking the hat only in secret(a yellow one with floppy cat ears strings and an edgy styled strawberry charm).Robins and Batgirls(2022-2023)was a helluva run starring Dick,Jason,Tim,Stephanie,Duke,Damian,Maps,Babs,Cass,Tam,Alysia and Nell and Jason's the only one who got thirst trap covers as it should be(Okay that's a lie,there were Stephcass thirst trap covers too LMAO.Faggot rights!!)

Duke has two core runs post-Robin:The Signal(2020-)and The Lights(2021-),the latter of which is his own team!!The members are Luna as Moonguide and his right-handwoman,Kiran Singh from the Wonderfam,Tanya Spears aka Power Girl ||,Jenni Ognats/XS,Mar'i Grayson/Nightstar,Jennifer Williams/Batika,Sin Harper as Arrowette ||| and the team baby,Darla Dudley as Shazam Girl and two upcoming ocs,a black male Star Sapphire who had his heart broken by a white girl💔and an X-Gene mutant from Earth 616 who ran away from their home dimension!!Duke's reputation as Robin proceeds him as it increases the shenanigans both in his civillian life and as The Signal and Thomquez are my fave classic black love tropes:'Thick baddie who stays keeping her mans fed' and 'Cocky ahh and playful but sweet and soft black dude who accidentally comes across as mocking x Nerdy feminine black girl who's not mean but pretends to be annoyed by his flirting with her because she's too embarrased to admit she actually likes him'.They do matching superhero names as adults to show they're married:Eris(Duke)and Selene(Luna)

Naturally,Duke is enrolled at Gotham Academy at now 15 and he mentors Maps when she comes along,including playing his game of Batwingman for her and Damian.Big hit with the GA girlies but unfortunately for them he only likes Luna and dudes who're mean to him(Woah,he's bisexual!I knew that!Also a Sonic The Hedgehog fan and his faves are Amy Rose,Shadow The Hedgehog and Sticks The Badger and he stans Penny Parker and draws gijinka fanart.Before i forget he also had his own youtube channel pre-Rhato and all his subscribers thought he died and he became a Creepypasta-)

And Batburger is his childhood happy place dating back to pre-Jokerization.He still visits Doug and Elaine and met Gnonom in Rhato only to pull a Percy Jackson and be spiteful and tell him off for his abandonment with zero forgiveness but realistically was still sad and hurt over his neglect so he let himself cry when he got back to The Fortress so Jason and Summer took him to Batburger to cheer him up and that led to his first visit to his parents in a long ass time.It and Batburger trips are part of his lifestyle obligatorily bi-monthly now

Oh the Gotham Police still hate him btw.He does all the work they gaslight people into thinking they do and none of the racism and assaults😔

[huboi]

GENSHIN BOYS WITH AN AUTISTIC S/O HEADCANONS (SUMERU BOYS)🌴

character(s) — cyno, tighnari, alhaitham, kaveh, wanderer

reader’s gender is not specified, nor is their race. I always try to make my fanfics as inclusive as possible

tw/cw — none ig, lmk if there are any

note(s) — I made this as an autistic person, however this may not include like every trait of someone with autism if that makes sense. PLS DON’T USE THIS FANFIC TO SELF DIAGNOSE URSELF WITH AUTISM, it’s important to get professionally diagnosed due to overlapping symptoms

CYNO

he would be the perfect boyfriend tbh

like if you have any hyperfixations u wanna talk about? he’s all ears

even if he’s busy playing tcg with someone, he doesn’t mind you talking about your hyperfixations with him

my man can multitask, it ain’t hard

if ur not a big fan of large crowded areas, he will make sure to walk with you in the least busiest parts of sumeru city

if you don’t like loud noises, like the crowded area, he will try his best to make sure he doesn’t bring you to loud areas

if anyone ever makes fun or belittles you for having autism.... he will beat them up/hj

he will mainly use his threatening aura to make them apologies or just make them leave you alone

no one messes with the mahamatras partner and gets away with it

you have comfort foods? he’s learning how to make them. whenever he can’t make them, he will buy them for you

you’re clingy? he loves that, hug him all you want, fidget with his hands all u want, he’s smitten asf

struggle to make eye contact? he’s ok with that too! he’s actually kinda used to it tbh, cause people can barely look him in the eye due to his status

overall, quite protective and just overall rlly loving, doesn’t rlly care u have autism, he still loves u as you are <33

TIGHNARI

when it comes to your sensory issues, he can relate, as a fennec hybrid his senses can easily get overwhelmed, so don’t worry about your sensory issues being a burden, he’s totally ok with it

have comfort foods? he will make them as much as he possibly can, he doesn’t mind how simple they are, he’s making them and sometimes he will buy them whenever he goes to the city

you stim? he will support you with it, if he’s feeling generous, which he usually is since ur his partner, he will let you fidget with his tail and ears, as long as ur gentle with them obviously

have hyperfixations? he’s all ears, quite literally, you can tell him all about whatever it is ur obsessed with no matter what he’s up to, whilst he’s studying the wildlife? he doesn’t mind, whilst he’s patrolling the forest? go ahead

anyone ever makes fun of you or is mean to you, he will sort them out with a good telling off. this sassy fox man will give them the lecture of a lifetime, he doesn’t mind if it’s for u tho :)

collei is supportive as well, she’s even more so understanding than the other forest rangers mainly due to her elazer, it’s not the same in any way shape or form, but she understands what it feels like to be different

ALHAITHAM

this man has traits that are quite similar to autism, so it doesn’t bother him that you have it, he’s supportive in his own way if you know what I mean

sensory issues? oh look, there’s now a pair of noise cancelling earphones for you, how strange, how’d that get there?

people would think that your stinking annoys him, newsflash it doesn’t. in a way he finds it kinda cute, but not in a belittling way if that makes sense

have hyperfixations? he can and will listen to you all day if he has to, and he would do it gladly too

doesn’t mind if ur clingy, he can read his book whilst you hug him on the couch or sum, kills two birds with one stone, he gets his research done, and you get cuddles

he’s actually a huge softy for you but won’t admit it to anyone, not even himself :))

KAVEH

kaveh is amazing, like best supportive boyfriend alert

if you have sensory issues, he can’t really help with the big crowds and loud noise but he’ll try his best to help you cope through it and give you distractions

like if ur in a crowded erea he’ll ask you to talk about your hyperfixations to him. if you don’t have hyperfixations he’ll just ask what you have done today

when it comes to taste sensory issues, he’ll try to avoid eating food that you dont like the smell of cause he doesn’t wanna overwhelm your nose. he will eat said food like that someplace else when ur not around

if you have comfort foods, he sadly can’t really buy them often since he doesn’t have a lot of money, but now and again as a special treat he can make it for you or buy it

clingy? great, he is too, cuddle him all you want, he’s not one to complain. wanna kiss him all over? go ahead, he embraces it

tries his best to understand how you work, he can sympathise with how frustrating things can be when people don’t quite understand you and how you work

you don’t like affection? that’s fine too, he will try to keep physical affection to a minimum as much as he possibly can, he can be affectionate in other ways tho

love language is probs spending personal time together, so that’s enough for him if u don’t want affection too

overall, 10/10 best boy and baby girl, recommend

WANDERER

ngl he’s not rlly the best, but he tries. it’s just really difficult for him to be nice since after all he’s been through, he tries tho, he really does

whenever you’re feeling overwhelmed by large crowds and/or noises, he will pick you up bridal style and bring you to nahidas place, where it’s quiet and no one else is there

like certain foods? he can’t cook, since he was made by ei who can’t cook to save her life, so he will just buy your comfort foods for you instead

want cuddles? it depends on his mood wether or not he’ll comply, if he’s in a good mood, yes, if he’s in a neutral mood, yes, if he’s in a bad mood, no.

whenever you stim, he sometimes watches, other times he looks away, he doesn’t wanna say anything mean to you by accident

if you can’t understand sarcasm, he’ll try his best to not use it around you, but it’s difficult sometimes since he has used sarcasm for so long

if you have hyperfixations and like to talk about them, he will listen, doesn’t mind hearing you talk about your interests, in a strange way it fascinates him, sometimes he asks questions other times he just stays silent and nods his head now and again in acknowledgment

if he ever hears anyone being mean to you, wether that be on purpose or not, he’s finna throw some hands, and he will win. tries not to actually fight them, tries to argue with them. he tries to fight less cause it makes nahida kinda upset

speaking of nahida, she’s amazing with you, like the best person to ever go to. she’s the god of wisdom after all, more or less knows how to take care of you during certain phases, he sometimes actually goes to her for advice on your behaviours and how best to support you, but you didn’t hear that from me

content belongs to @huboi on tumblr, DO NOT REPOST ON ANY SOCIAL MEDIA PLATFORMS WHATSOEVER

[mooshie-blue]

🐻‍❄️CAPTAIN BARNACLES HEADCANONS🐻‍❄️

He doesn’t really know what his sexuality is, he’s attracted to all genders but doesn’t think he’s pan or bi, but he is somewhere on the ace spectrum

He’s somewere in his 30’s

He’s autistic, he stims by patting his sides with his hands and tapping his feet, he likes routine, he’s very particular about his own space, given his profession he does expect some chaos and sometimes writes about his frustrations in his captains log to settle himself down and cool off at the end of the day.

He also has PTSD from both being trapped in an ice cavern as a kid and some of the missions he and the octonauts go on. He did let the Octonauts know ahead of time and asked that they be patient with him when he has a flashback, each of them researched ways they can help him when he needs it. They all communicate with each other. The octonauts are very patient with Barnacles and he appreciates it deeply.

He’s good at taking care of and protecting kids, he’s patient and kind with them, but he has trouble actually speaking with them in a non dangerous situation. Whenever they chatter about silly stuff, he just smiles and listens.

When it comes to romance, it’s not something he thinks about a lot. When he finds someone he likes, he’ll know it. He’s had crushes in the past and has dated before but he’s not really sure how to go about it, he feels like he’s too far behind and too awkward to date.

He has very pretty handwriting, in his free time as a polar scout, he would practice cursive.

He doesn’t usually text, but when he does he sends slightly lengthy messages, he doesn’t like using acronyms like “lol” so he says stuff like “that gave me a good laugh!” Or “haha!” He likes using heart emojis because he thinks they’re cute and send a kind tone.

Despite the fact that Shellington is their main caregiver, the Vegimals also see Barnacles as a father figure. He makes them feel safe, and he’s tentative to them as well. They’re always curious about his hobbies and like joining him, like when he sings in the rain, they like watching his shadow puppet shows, they do enjoy his accordion playing (even if it’s bad sometimes)

Has very dark blue eyes, they’re very big and puppy-like, (think Ballister Boldheart from Nimona.)

His love language is words of affirmation and acts of service, he likes receiving hugs but he heavily prefers if someone asks first (claustrophobia) he also prefers initiating the hugs.

Heavy sleeper during the winter the quietness in the air puts him at ease.

Sometimes as a joke, the octonauts (especially Kwazii) call out, “O, Captain, My Captain!” When they see Barnacles, he thinks it’s funny.

Live laugh love barnacles

[just-a-sleepy-idiot]

Herbert West Imagine: Being your Roommate and slowly starting to care about you

Why is he so cute it’s so unfair. Shout out to @herbert-west-did-nothing-wrong for being an archive of cool Re-animator content and furthering my hyperfixation hoho hehe

Content/Warnings: Gender neutral Reader, Some fake dating, Violence against Zombie animals, Dr. Hill is obsessed with Reader the way he is with Meg in the movie, Swearing, Herbert being addicted to the Reagent like in the uncut version & Withdrawal, Autistic Herbert West

When his unsuspecting Roommate turned out to be a Insomniac night owl his initial plan of secrecy had to be turned around. Or to be more specific, it was rather the very unfortunate moment when you happened to catch him wrestle the Re-Animated Raccoon that tried to claw through his labcoat in the middle of the night when he realized that he couldn‘t get around some explaining. „Get it off me!! Get it off me!“ He yelled, trying to keep the beasts treacherous little zombie hands away from him. „Fuck! Fuck, Herbert what the hell!?“ You yelled back while hurriedly grabbing a towel and trying to pry it off him with that. The Racoon ended up Re-Dead eventually, after an excruciating fight that showed you the extent to how fucking Undead that thing turned out to be. You stared at Herbert in Horror, he was heaving and leaning back against the Operation table he had set up. He was quick to jump and talk to you, „Listen-„

You were this close to demanding he‘d move out as fast as he had turned up that evening a few days ago, when he knocked at your door with the sign you had posted to the Hospital staff‘s board about looking for a Roommate. You were vaguely aware of what he was studying, at least you witnessed how strongly he defended his opinions about Brain death against Dr. Hill, who was the head surgeon of the clinic but also his teacher. And as such the older man was more than inclined to fail Herbert in class over his upfront disrespect. You were somewhat uncomfortable with Dr. Hill as well for a long time, and maybe the fact that Herbert openly disputed against him was part of the reason why you didn‘t turn him off when he turned up on your doorstep.

But he showed you, he proved to you, that the insane claims he was using as his explanation were actually true. His research has led him to revive the dead, no matter the damage the body has taken before, because soon after the wretched beast you had just thought dead came back to life, if that absolutely murderous state it went into could be called life.

You were sat there, next to him and stared at the cadaver. Blood on Herberts shirt and loosened tie, and you in your silly Pyjamas. „Which is why I need your help Y/n.“ Your head turned quickly, „Help you?“ He scooted a bit closer, „Yes! You are the perfect assistant. You are hardworking, we work in the same Hospital and you have no functioning sleep schedule.“ You frowned at that, but well, he was right. „We could do something great, conquer Death!“ He put a hand on your shoulder and you looked him in the eyes for a very long moment. You let out a stressed out sigh, „for gods sake.. ok, alright. This is.. just insane, Herbert, but it‘s the kind of insane that I can‘t just leave be. I‘ve never seen anything like it.“ Herbert smiled, patting your shoulder enthusiastically.

That is how he got himself an Assistant by chance. As long as he could keep you motivated to keep going and pushing through the Horror his research would really benefit from the help you were providing.

You weren‘t as obsessed about working day and night as he was though, which is why you didn‘t react too pleased when he stormed into your room at nearly 4 in the morning to tell you about a new theory he had. He didn‘t really notice how you were snuggling a plushie, or how you had curled up in the moment as he ranted on and paced your room excitedly. You let out a long stretched moan and grimaced at him, “I was sleeping..!” You complained, but he didn’t really listen. Only when you threw a pillow at him he halted, looking at you in offense. “That was uncalled for.” “Apparently it is! I wanna sleep Herbert now gooo” you stood up and shoved him out of your room. “No bursting into my room while I’m sleeping!” He turned around, getting a last look at your sleepy, disgruntled face before you shut the door on him and went back to sleep. Only when he huffed and puffed, walking back down into the basement, he remembered how you have looked sleeping. Curled up like a Pillbug, he thought.

The next day he found that the lack of sleep had not really made you forgiving towards him when he tried to tell you about his findings. He clenched and unclenched his fists nervously, frowning as he tried to figure out his next step of action. Herbert never needed to prove himself to anyone or be particularly likeable to make it to where he was now, his work spoke for itself. So he genuinely didn’t know how the heck he was going to fix something that was well.. a person. He needed you to be cooperative, and pissing off his only assistant was not very beneficial to his work.

When you came home, Herbert was already sat there and stood up quickly. „Look,“ you already looked at him pretty much pissed, much like this night while you threw him out. He came forward and firmly held out a plastic bag, neatly wrapped inside was a piece of your favorite cake. „No more bursting into your room while you’re sleeping.“ He said, lowering his head without breaking his continuous eye contact. „Is that.. how did you know I liked that?“ He nodded, „See I‘m not always listening but my brain is always taking in information.“

You took the bag and raised your brows, a slight smile on your lips as you took out the cake. „Alright.. I accept.“ you said, putting down the cake to go into the kitchen to get a fork. „So what did you find out?“ He smiled as well, clapping into his hands and starting to explain it all. You came back with two forks. You made Herbert try some too, as it turns out he is more a dark chocolate kind of guy, and he makes a face when he finds things too sweet that makes you giggle.

Herbert was always eager to go back home and experiment after work, the days were Dr. Hill taught were especially agitating to him. „I feel like every minute I am forced listen to this man it’s diminishing my brain capacity.“ He complained every time. Those were days were he stayed in the lab until the sun rose, and listen, throwing stones in a glass house and all but this was too extreme. You noticed he was still up when you woke up to pee. Did he even eat dinner? You spied into the kitchen, no trace of dishes.

He was scribbling down a new variant to his substance he had thought of, it was brilliant! This would solve at least one of the major problems you had been encountering in your experiments, he couldn’t wait to put the chances into action and see how the reagents power changed. Herbert lifted his gaze without fully looking up when he heard the familiar creak of the wooden stairs. „You need to see this Y/n.“ He bickered you closer. He was surprised to find a plate with Pancakes in his field of vision. He looked up from them to you. You were in a different set of silly pyjamas now. „You didn’t eat. How are you gonna save me from Zombie Goldfish if you faint?” You joked and reached for his notebook to read his new results. He stared at you for a while, then said „Why do all of your pyjamas look like that.“ „Hey!“ “Also by now I deem you capable enough to bring down a Zombie fish yourself.” “That is the sweetest thing you ever said to me Herbert.” He shot you a look over his glasses.

Though, he ate the pancakes when you left and they were good. You didn’t make them too sweet. Judging from the way you giggled at his reaction to the cake you must have had remembered. Hm.

It was another night, another period of labwork he was up to with you. You were replicating the reagent for him into smaller, portable versions you could take into the Hospital to begin and document the reactions to human bodies with low dosages. You poured some of it too quickly and a cloud of poisonous gas errupted from the glass, you nearly fell back trying to evade it- your chair already tipped over and you closed your eyes, but the crash didn’t come.

You looked up, still holding onto the glass for dear life, and saw Herbert looming over you from behind the chair. He had swooped in and grabbed it from the back before you could fall. Why did this somehow feel.. close, the way you looked up at him that way. The way his knuckles turned white from gripping the chair, and the way he frowned down at you. You eyed his face. “You should avoid dying before I perfected my reagent.” He said, still holding you. Your feet dangled in the air, you put your head further back. “Don’t worry, I would come back as a ghost to haunt you.” “Why would you do that?” You raised your hands up to his face, cupping his cheeks, surprisingly gently. “I wanna spook you once, not see you as composed as you always appear to be.” Herbert swallowed, his eyes flickered over you for a moment. Your fingertips were warm against his skin. Why were you.. your lips parted in a smile. He cleared his throat and carefully set your chair down again.

“You really need safety googles, let me see if I have an extra.” He looked through his stuff, finding his thoughts trail off. He paused for a moment without noticing, briefly letting his eyes flicker around without really focusing on something. When he found them he turned around and gave them to you for you to try on. “Do I look good?” “You look safe. That is good.”

A week or so later you were both at the Hospital, working as usual. Herbert went to your station to discuss your next test subject, he happened to find an older man who was sure to die soon of his illness that he intended to try and Re-Animate. If the bodies weren‘t registerested in the Morgue in the first place it couldn‘t be traced back to the few with the authority of entering it, aka you. So if he just waited until the patient died and took his chance before anyone took the body he would make for a perfect test subject. When he arrived at your station he looked around for you, only eventually finding you cornered against a door by none other than the most dimwitted person in the Hospital; „Dr. Hill, I really need to be getting back to work..“ you said and tried to walk past him, but he blocked your way with his body.

„Now Y/n there‘s no need to be in a rush, I‘m sure someone will handle it. Surely you‘ll have some more time for me to discuss dinner.“ „Well.. um, like I said, I‘m sorry but I‘m already getting something with Mr. West tonight.“ The older man rolled his head back for a moment and laughed spiteful at the mention of his name. „Yes but you are rooming with.. Mr. West, so you will have plenty of occasions to eat with him. But you see, I am a very busy man and my company is high in demand. You should prioritize me making time for you.“

Herbert saw the way you smiled, and from what he had learned about body language over the years he would most likely interpret this as a sign that you were flattered and comfortable with his invitation- but there was something that went against that deduction; Your eyes. Either way he didn‘t look people in the eye or he did so to an extent that was considered staring. But he had seen you smile, at him, at the cake he got you, at the note he left on the fridge that said ‚Leftover Dinner left, Bag of Eyes right! Do not accidentally microwave‘ so he knew what you looked like when you smiled. And.. you weren‘t smiling with your eyes right now. You always smiled with your eyes, did that mean that your expression was simulated? Were you in distress?

He approached swiftly, clearing his throat to get Dr. Hill to turn around. „I shouldn‘t be surprised to find out that your ignorance isn‘t limited to your scientific research, Dr. Hill, but here we are. Y/n, I need to discuss something with you.“ You were more than happy to use the moment of Dr. Hill‘s bubbling irritation and slip past him and next to Herberts side. „Mister West.“ He said through gritted teeth, „It seems like you are compensating your inability to surpass me by taking something from me in reach, but let me assure you that a Roommate isn‘t as important as a Lover can be.“ When he said the last words he looked at you with a smug smile, not even hiding that he thought of himself as your suitor. You looked horrified.

„I agree. Now if you‘ll excuse us, it’s 3 PM and therefore Y/n‘s Lunchbreak.“ Herbert held eye contact with Dr. Hill as he put a hand on your back and led you away. The older mans eyes widened in disbelief at the implications of him agreeing, of the way he put a hand on your back when you left. „Are you saying you are-?“ Herbert didn‘t stop to listen and made you follow his pace as well. Did he just hugely imply that he and you were affiliated? Yes. Did he plan to do so? Certainly not, but it just happened to be the perfect split between pissing of Dr. Hill and helping you out of the situation and potentially even future attempts like these. How wonderfully efficient.

„Now, I wanna show you the perfect candidate for our-„ „Herbert“ he looked at you, eyes flickering over your features as he rapidly noticed a change in your expression. Your cheeks were reddened, your lips slightly pressed together. The redness even extended to your ears. „You are embarrassed. Or flustered. Which is it so I know for future reference.“ He observed and you blushed even more.

„Now the whole Hospital is going to think we are a Couple!“ He shrugged his brows and led you further through the Hospital, you whispered as a colleague walked past. „Potentially, since Dr. Hill is more concerned with spreading misinformation anyway than working.“ He paused, „Ah, I did not account for the possibility that you already have a crush on someone here. If they heard about that it wouldn‘t be to your advantage.“ „Yes, I mean, I don‘t but- now we gotta act like it in front of him too.“ He hummed in acknowledgement, well, surely that wouldn‘t be too hard.

He had you meet the man that he meant to Re-animate if everything went according as planned, you inspected him and gave Herbert a look. It was doable, his body was weak so in case of aggression he could easily be restrained for both your safety, and lastly the man had decided to donate his body to science anyway after his passing.

„I think I can ask to switch shifts to his station and make sure the beeper doesn’t go off once he passes.“ You said as Herbert walked you back to your station, „Then you distract the nurses while I get the body out in a Wheelchair.“ Herbert added and you nodded, slightly nervous about the whole thing already. Bringing a full human back to life.. was it even possible to conserve the refined parts of the human brain and personality or would it operate like the animals as well that he brought back?

You reached your station. Herbert surprisingly took your hand in his, your eyes widened yet you didn’t resist the gesture. Reaching out, he did that a lot, he does in when he fails to verbalize what he wants to communicate in an emotional extent. But people usually react with.. a leap of faith, and trust in him when he does this instead. Touch, hold onto their arm for a moment. And he reaches out for your hand now and you trust him, you let him.

„Listen, Dr. Hill is watching us.“ He said, and you blinked, eyes darting to your hands as you suddenly understood his gesture for what is meant- an attempt at portraying romance.

Your hands were warm, almost beaming with heat. It wasn’t uncomfortable.

„Would you consent to me pretending to kiss you for the sake of proving our lie. He isn’t close enough to actually see if our lips touch.“

You squeezed his hand and slightly stepped closer, breath hitching. „I consent.“ He studied you, sighing and wetting his lips. The way he looked at you, if he reciprocated eye contact at all, was always intense and yet this was.. as if he was actually taking in much more of you. Not just reciprocating a gesture to an intense amount, but actually looking at your face, all of it. Why did he feel his pulse raise? He took another step towards you and closed in- until there were centimeters left between your lips. Your noses slightly brushed against each other, your breath gently fanned over his skin. Both of you had closed your eyes, Herbert felt your hand on his chest clenching slightly onto his shirt. You radiated warmth, why did he want to have you even closer than that?

He stepped away again, opening his eyes. For a second he saw you, with closed eyes and a reddened face.

„I think that will suffice for a bit, depending if Dr. Hill has enough audacity to flirt with someone who is supposedly already committed.“ He concluded, straightening his glasses. He felt weird, somehow.. anxious? Anticipating? Frustrated? Disappointed? Hm. Hard to tell.

„Ah.. yup! Um, maybe it works!“ You said, swallowing and bidding him goodbye until work ended. And Dr. Hill actually walked past you that shift without saying anything else, purposefully not acknowledging you as it seems.

You felt anxious about going home that day, not really knowing what has changed exactly that made you feel that way. What did you expect to happen? Nothing actually.. happened! You did not kiss, this shouldn’t feel so Sitcom-ish. And yet-

you came home, the kitchen light was on but you didn’t see Herbert. He must be home, he was always tinkering with something as soon as he was free to do so after work. Sometimes he didn’t even wait until then, but right now there was no light coming from the basement. Only from his door, and that was unusual. You never even saw that man in a pyjama once! As far as you were concerned he had an identical set of clothes to sleep in. ‚I can get behind wanting to revive the dead but that is just weird Herbert‘ you once told him, to which he replied ‚at least I don’t sleep in something that is patterned with geese‘ which really only showcased your point.

„Hey, do you wanna eat something?“ You asked, not straightforwardly showing your concern. „Y/n..“ he muttered, and you frowned, now opening the door. What you saw was a very distraught looking Herbert, rummaging through his things with the small fridge he kept in there open as well. „Fuck- there are no probes in the right stage!“ he howled, hands shaky and room disheveled. „What are you talking about??“ he turned around but didn’t look at you, his eyes darted over the room panicking. „I can’t.. inject any of them at this stage this is..“ his breath hitched, you were putting the pieces together in your head. He was talking about using it on himself, and judging from the erratic state he was in he was physically addicted to it. He was pale too, the withdrawal must have kicked in a while ago. He behaved both impulsive and weakened. There is.. something you needed to do. He sat down on his bed, fidgeting and running his hands through his hair. „It keeps me awake, keeps my mind running.“ That didn’t even sound unlike him, it made sense for him to try and find a way to ditch any kind of the human experience he didn’t like. He did it with death so why not sleep too while he was at it.

„That means you‘ll go to sleep after a while, once your body gets exhausted enough from the withdrawal.“ He nodded, you sat down next to him on the bed. „The Hospital doesn’t have a the tools of dealing with the specific addiction you’re dealing with right now and we don’t have any reagents that are ready to fix either so.. I‘m gonna stay here ok? Monitor you so I know you‘re safe. I‘m gonna fetch that terrible Novel I‘m reading right now to distract you from the pain with a different kind of pain, hold on.“

And he let you do so- listening to you read the book to him while fidgeting nervously and running a hand through his hair or over his arm as he tried to let himself be distracted by what you were saying.

You kept reading to him until 5 AM, Herbert was still struggling but getting more weaker by the hour. He frowned and closed his eyes here and there to rest a bit, visually displeased to be requiring that sort of thing. He muttered that it was wasted time he could use better, but his physical agony seemed to find a bit of relief in this. ‚You were usually asleep now‘, he said when he noted how tired you were at this point, ‚you should just go to bed.‘ He didn’t understand how stubborn you were on staying with him to look out for his safety even though he assured you he was fine. You were nearly drifting off to sleep yourself, resting your eyes as well when he asked „Why do you even care so much?„ Your answer was murmured as your consciousness slipped, „Because I care about you“ your head sunk more against the bed frame behind you since you both resorted to sit at the end of his bed.

Herbert stared at you, frowning once more but slightly bewildered. He was important to you? Personally? Your lips parted as slumber caught you fully in mere moments after those spoken words. If it wasn’t for what you said.. he would have never even thought about wether he reciprocated what you felt, but somehow he found that- he did care about you too. He had cared about your distress earlier and went to resolve it without fully acknowledging why, despite being highly agitated just by the thought of exchanging a word with Dr. Hill. He cared about your opinions on his Experiments. And he even cared about how you felt about him, and it wasn’t even fully based on the necessity of having you as his Assistant. He pressed his lips together.

Herbert straightened his glasses and looked over to you again. With a sigh he grabbed the blanket and put it on top of you, covering you up to your shoulder which made you intuitively sink further into the mattress. He crossed his arms and closed his eyes for a bit as well, fully keeping his stern expression as he slowly fell asleep as well without noticing.

For the first time in a long time he fell asleep again, and for the first time in a very long time he wasn’t alone.

I was literally non stop writing this since I watched the movie a few days ago. I would love to write more for him or maybe even write a part 2 of this? If ppl like this and want me to I‘d love to hear what you have to say. Comments get me motivated and keep the hyperfixation running

[salty-croissants]

I’m literally in love with your stuff. Can you maybe to Bullfrog and Rayman with an autistic reader?

Thank you for the request ! 

I’m so happy you’ve been enjoying my writings , it really means a lot ❤️

I gotta say I was a bit worried about not doing this one right … I did put a few things that I personally find relatable as someone who is autistic myself , thought it would be nice to include is all , I hope this works ! 

Details : use of gender neutral reader ; 

established relationships ; 

no warnings needed 

Bullfrog 💚 

So , this frog man ? He loves you unconditionally , and he just really wants you to know that he will always accept you and your unique traits , even when you feel insecure about them …

< I … I don’t know , Bullfrog … sometimes I just feel like all I’m doing is being a burden to y - > 

< Non . Don’t even finish that . 

You’re the most wonderful person I have ever met , y/n , and there isn’t a single day in which I’m not thankful for having you in my life . > 

< Really … ? > 

< Oui , mon amour . I long for nothing more than being with you . > 

< *sniff* > 

< Oh - Are you alright ? I’m so sorry , I didn’t mean to make you cry - > 

< Heh … it’s okay … I’m just really happy . 

I love you so much ~ >

  Bullfrog loves listening to you enthusiastically going on and on about something you’re passionate about , especially when he’s not having a good day : 

just hearing the sound of your voice is so , so very comforting to him … if he could he would sit beside you for days , his attention reserved for you and you alone . 

< … and what’s even more awesome is that there is actually a really subtle easter egg hidden in the background which changes the entire narrative for that charact - 

… wait , how long have I been … ? >

< That is very interesting my dear ! 

Please keep going , j'adore le son de ta voix ~ >

< Aww - > 

Your adorable expressions when he showers you with compliments …

Bullfrog can’t even begin to describe how happy they make him ://)

If being around people gets too overwhelming , Bullfrog is quick to pick up on that and he’ll immediately get you someplace more quiet , willing to do whatever it takes to make sure you’re comfortable and safe … 

< Is this really okay ? I’m so sorry , it’s just … it was so crowded and loud in there , and I … >

< Mon cher , there is no reason for you to be sorry … let’s just stay here for now , then if you wish to try and go back in we can do that , or we can always go back home : I assure you , you’ve already done more than enough tonight … I am very proud of you , and you should be too . > 

And if one day something starts making you very , very anxious ? 

Well , no matter what the reason is and no matter how small it might be Bullfrog is going to stay close to you to help you out in whatever way he can .

< I’m so sorry for making you put up with me like this … you already have so much to take care of , and this … is just dumb . > 

< y/n , ce n'est pas te supporter , you know that .

I want to be there for you , the same way you’re always there for me …

I promise you , we can find a way out of this , you don’t have to deal with it on your own . > 

< Thank you so much , Bullfrog … you’re amazing ~ > 

< Ce serait toi , my dear … I’m truly blessed to have you by my side ~ > 

Rayman 🧡

Saying that you mean a lot to this man would be an understatement …

You mean absolutely everything to him , so you better believe that Rayman will always be careful about all the things that could potentially make you uncomfortable , remembering them all very accurately .

< Here sweetie , hold my hand for a moment … > 

< Oh - okay , but why ? > 

< We’re gonna need to pass through that crowd over there , it should be quick but I don’t want you to get overwhelmed by having many people and loud noises all around , so let’s just stay close until we get through … > 

< Thanks Ray … just … don’t let go , please . > 

< I would never . > 

All the effort Rayman puts into making you feel as comfortable as possible no matter where the two of you are … it never fails to warm your heart . 

If anyone even remotely says something mean spirited about you … 

Ohh boy , he’s not going to let it slide .

< Uh , excuse me ? WHAT was that about my partner ? > 

< Ray , honey , it’s okay … > 

Yeah , Rayman is definitely very protective of you , and he will defend you with no hesitation if anyone dares to try and make you feel inadequate in any way . 

Rayman loves listening to you talk about whatever topics come to your mind while he’s working …

It actually helps him focus quite a lot , and he really never gets bored of seeing how happy you look when info dumping about something you’re passionate about .

You’re just so pretty ! He can’t get over it …

If you tend to lose focus to the point of forgetting to take care of yourself , Rayman has got you covered : he makes sure to remind you to eat and drink water often , even leaving little notes in places where he knows you’ll find them …

“Important : remember to eat today ! <3”

“If you’re reading this … get a glass of water !” 

His devotion to you is nothing less than adorable … but then again , you’re the person he cares about most , the one that showed him kindness without asking for anything in return , so now ? 

Rayman deems it only fair to repay that kindness in his own way . 

[authormars]

If you ever get tired of sharing DiaLuci HC and Shenanigans, tell us about your Lucifer HC/Scenarios. Share some crack HC's too! Those are also really hilarious.

(P.S. can you share some Lucifer hc's...?)

I mean, you know I love Lucifer headcanons. He is my fav and my hyperfixation

For about 100 years after the fall, Lucifer was rebelling against everything his father made him. That included being prideful and siding with the demon prince, but that also included him being a woman for about 50 years until he was like "I am not a woman" and then he had a gender crisis when he realized he didn't actually know what he was.

Lucifer is autistic (though he's very good at masking) and his hyperfixation is birds

Lucifer does actually need glasses, he just wears contacts most of the time. Diavolo thinks he looks very cute in his glasses.

Lucifer, like a bird, cannot see glass. Unlike Mammon, however, he has the common sense to watch where people are going. If he sees that others are avoiding somewhere that he thinks has nothing there, he'll avoid it. Unlike Mammon who thinks "SHORTCUT" and smacks into glass

Lucifer is still heavily traumatized by being forced to train to be an archangel from an early age. He has episodes I call Humility episodes where he'll agree to anything and let you walk all over him because he views himself as worthless.

Lucifer has a need to be perfect. He considers scars to be imperfections. Because of this, he constantly has an illusion spell going (which I briefly mention in my fic Jealous Boy) to hide his scars and pact mark.

Lucifer has a peacock tail that's black and red and gold, but it's often hidden so it doesn't get in the way.

If you want more, feel free to ask. If you have a particular situation you want to see, ask it! I will write any request in my asks, even nsfw ones bc I don't care

[sophie-frm-mars]

Liberal Dissociative Amnesia

The Cass Review is the most discussed political topic among trans people in the UK right now. The 388 page report by Dr Hillary Cass examines the gender services available to young people in the UK and concludes that young people are being let down, gender services need to be taken out of reach for trans people under 25 and a new system which urges avoiding transition at every turn needs to be created which will refer people at age 25.

I just watched Michael Walker on Novara Media say "I think there are some very difficult questions here that I really don't know the answer to", and I find myself baffled by statements like this. I did actually understand in watching what specific questions he thought were "difficult", and I think someone could probably answer them pretty effectively to a standard he was happy with if he had a well informed trans person who he trusted in his life. The problem is, the whole segment was presented with as much equivocation and both-sidesing as possible, this constant air of "what if"

I feel like I'm observing a dissociative amnesia that people like this run into when discussing something that people they can easily see are bigots have declared to be scientific and complicated and requiring serious scrutiny. The Novara team understand the broad wave of anti-trans attacks happening across much of the world, particularly America and Britain, right now, even if they won't necessarily call it genocide - so why does this story exist completely devoid of context? Why is it suddenly time to ask "difficult questions"?

Walker wonders out loud about people on a spectrum where at one end people would have always been cis under all circumstances and on the other they would have always been trans, and in the middle of course are people who might transition if it's easier and there's less stigma. His point as far as I can tell is that somewhere in there it could get TOO easy to transition and then people will do it and regret it. Do I need to bother saying this is why we have informed consent?

It's like the people trying to wipe us out are playing Simon Says with the most progressive of our liberal media. The progressives can see bigotry for what it is most of the time and then somehow suddenly it becomes ✨special science bigotry ✨ and, perhaps because there's an institutional weight behind it, perhaps because it claims to be a serious study, or perhaps just because of the aesthetics of intellectualism the progressive journalists mysteriously forget about the whole wider context of transphobia around the world and have to apply rigorous journalistic standards to it.

"There's social contagion!" "No that's bigotry"

"They're just undiagnosed autistic people!" "No they're trans AND autistic"

"They're coming after the kids!" "No, that's age old queerphobia"

"✨Simon Says ✨ there's social contagion!" "oh well this warrants very careful discussion, I need to think very hard about this before taking a side here, it's a toxic culture war debate and we must remain ✨rational✨ when discussing issues like this..."

[grison-in-space]

Reading Men Who Hate Women (Laura Bates, 2020) at the moment. She's talking about the manosphere: the massive online communities of men who congregate to talk misogyny, ranging from PUAs to MRAs, incels and MGTOW. These aren't new topics to me—I've been following this off and on since watching Gamergate kick off—but Bates handles them well and I think this book could serve as an introduction if this is a movement with which you're not familar. By the way, it's been a decade since Gamergate this year. Isn't that a kicker?

(Incidentally, I first ran into the concept of incels way before I think many people did: when I was still on AVEN, c. 2006-2007ish, I remember a few occasions where users ran into incel communities and brought them to our forums to ask: is this like what we're doing? Is this like us? Consensus quickly solidified on the direction of "no," each time, not least because asexuality dialog at the time was extremely clear about divorcing desire from action, and it was very clear that the desires centered in that community were very different than the ones people in asexuality spaces were untangling.)

Bates handles the topic with grace, compassion, and a deep understanding that I really wish more writing on radicalization or terroristic networks used: people in real pain, who are struggling in pitiable circumstances to do their best and clearly need more support, can also in their pain be truly dangerous to others. Hurt people hurt people. Compassion for pain suffered is important—you can't understand recruitment without understanding that—but you also have to understand that pain, fermented in darkness, can create deadly poisons. Pain isn't essentially holy or cleansing or cauterizing. It doesn't accomplish anything good by existing. If we can relieve it, we should—but we should follow harm reduction principles as we do so, lest pain be allowed to multiply and fester.

What gets me is that in 2017, in the wake of the Google bro "manifesto," I spent a feverish week writing what wound up being a 20,000 word rebuttal studded with what eventually totaled 100+ peer reviewed citations. It got quite a bit of reach and covered ground ranging from effects of testosterone on behavior, the concept of effect size in sex differences, basic statistics, the ways that humans treat people differently based on their perception of gender, intersex trauma, and whether feminists care about men's problems (yeah, actually, and they should).

I released that piece, changed up my name and fannish presence—my long time pseud was tangled all over the piece's genesis—and hunkered down for the reprisals. I expected harassment and vitriol. It never really came: I ignored the comments on the post, after a bit, and I held boundaries on what I was willing to pay attention to. But by and large, I had no direct consequences from the Manosphere.

Perhaps the piece was too long (although I got many comments from people who read it and found it useful, and I included an index). Perhaps it was simply that I included a headshot of myself, with uncharacteristic red lipstick and characteristically buzzed hair, and cheerfully discussed throughout that I was butch and queer: sometimes I confuse people who are very focused on bioessentialist sex differences, because I don't fit their paradigms in the slightest.

About six months later, James Damore attempted to frame his incredibly poor decisions in light of his Asperger's, and I did get a couple dudes on social media presenting me with this information apparently in the hope that it would shock or embarrass me. I immediately pointed out, acerbically, that I'm equally autistic and that he was making us look bad, and they melted away again into the background. It wasn't really the well of terrifying anger and obliterative fury I was expecting.

I find myself reading these stories in Bates' book and thinking about the internet I grew up on: AVEN by 2005, WrongPlanet the same year, listening to people on the margins talk about their fears and hopes and dreams and theories about themselves. I find myself thinking about narratives and meaning, the stories we tell ourselves about who we are and why.

I'm certainly not the first person to worry about radicalization of young autistic people, especially autistic men. Not even close. Paradoxically, it's a group of people for whom an understanding of intersectionality is crucial: young disabled men often alienated deliberately from conceptualizing themselves as disabled, without the tools to understand why life is hard and painful and never seems to reflect their experiences, trying to construct understanding beyond one's singular, isolated defective wrongness—which is what's left, if you take community off the table.

(Have I mentioned how grateful I am that so many autistics are trans spectrum? Imagine if we weren't, and if I didn't have so many transfeminine sisters funneled along those same currents and drifting closely enough alongside to understand. My sisters, so many of whom are out there living and modeling better ways to understand and participate in gender as a social activity: by figuring out what is most comfortable for you, understanding that comfort for one might be agony for another, and taking steps to shape your own life into a fashion that wells forth the most peace and joy. It's a message we all need to hear, but that is a group of people I hear singing so loudly from my place in a different wing of the choir, and I love them for it.)

I don't have answers. As is, so often, the case these days, I have only grief and love, and the determination to build better structures where my own hands reach. I had intended to direct my career, once, to undermining the entire concept of "good genes" models of evolution and explaining how their convoluted connections to natural phenomena are better explained by other, more direct motives. Since 2020, I've been moving in a new direction—but what precisely it is, I'm not sure.

Sex differences is certainly a piece of it, though. Even if I find myself often enough writing that it's not enough to know a sex difference in one species to assume that another will reflect a similar relationship: we should study sex differences in animals, but we really shouldn't assume that humans will have the same ones or work the same way. I suspect this won't be the first time I tangle with that community. I suppose it depends how much authority I can accrue as protection first.

[shentheauthor]

I cannot resist, but headcanons on the Harbingers' types? Like what they would like in a S/O? 🤭

Crabsolutely, friend

Gender neutral s/o, no content warnings

Pierro:

Someone calm

Preferably smart too

Like someone he can play chess with

And just drink tea quietly with

This man needs some peace in his life lmao

Please braid his hair, he is touch starved and needs affection, but he’s old and he can’t say it out loud

Capitano:

Someone who can protect themself

He will def protect you, but when he isn’t there, he wants to know you’ll be safe

Also, he would love a sparring partner as well as a romantic one

If you can keep up with him, color him impressed

I also feel like he isn’t much of a talker, so if you’re cool with just hanging out in silence, he will be drawn to you

Dottore:

A test subject /j

It would actually probably start out that way 😭😭

If you can hold an intelligent conversation and keep him amused, tho, he will stop trying to experiment on you

He will explode with joy if you ask him about his work

And if you listen and remember what he says? Whipped

Basically a good listener and someone who doesn’t mind his psychopathic tendencies lmao

Hell if you’re a bit of a murderous gremlin yourself, he’ll be even more into you

Bc then you can do horrible fucked up experiments ✨together✨

Columbina:

Someone cute who can sing duets with her

She wouldn’t mind whether you’re loud or quiet

She can put up with both

She isn’t super picky about partners, but a good singing voice is a green flag for her

She’d already be intrigued if you aren’t afraid of her, but if you don’t underestimate her either, you’ve definitely got an interested columbina on your hands

Arlecchino:

Probably someone interested in her work

She has high standards tho

Good listener, can cook, willing to adjust your schedule for her, good with kids, but also willing to harshly punish subordinates, etc

She wants someone like her

But maybe a bit nicer lmao

Pulcinella:

Like Pierro, he prefers quiet people

Someone willing to help him deal with stress without adding onto that stress

Also he wants someone good with kids

He will bring his partner with him to visit family and friends, so a social person is better

Just someone he can be quietly domestic and soft with

Gilf moment Fr

Scaramouche

I’m never gonna stop including him and Signora

Anyway tho, he wants someone quiet, but he will actually be somewhat pleasantly surprised if you talk back to him

You’d have to be careful, but he will like you if you can keep up with his rudeness and clap back without fear

Bonus points if you’re strong. He doesn’t want to “coddle” his partner, so he wants someone who can take care of themself

He would also want someone who can read him well. Understanding his moods is a must.

It’s hard to get him to open up, but he would really want someone willing to love him completely without leaving him

Abandonment issues go brrr

Sandrone:

A puppet

Like literally

But if she had to choose a partner who is a normal human, she would want someone who doesn’t care if she’s possessive

She is kind of a yandere, so if you’re into that, she is into you

Bonus points if you’re willing to cook for her

She forgets to eat a lot, and someone who takes care of her would be appreciated

Also, if you’re interested in her work

The way to an autistic’s heart is through the special interest /srs

Signora:

Someone who will love her unconditionally

Someone who doesn’t treat her like a monster

Someone who isn’t afraid of her

She would also love someone strong and smart

Preferably witty too

Like if she can have a healthy banter with you

Her type is Rostam, but if you aren’t Rostam, that’s ok

A strong and protective partner is perfect for her

She can take care of herself just fine, but the feeling of being cared about is unmatched

I miss her so much raaaahhhh

Pantalone:

He would want someone who lets him spoil them

Genuinely

He will lavish you with gifts if you will let him

ALSO, intelligence is a must

He doesn’t have patience for dull conversation

If finances bore you, he actually doesn’t mind

He knows everyone is different

As long as you don’t steal from him, he won’t care

Someone who cares enough to help him de-stress after work is a green flag

He would also love it if you can cook or sew, and is actually open to learning your hobbies if they interest him

Please play board games with him, he’d be so happy

Also he wants a good listener who will hear him ramble without complaining

Tartaglia:

Do you like kids?

Are you open to learning to cook?

Can you spar with him and provide a challenge?

If the answer to all of these questions is “yes,” congrats, you are exactly his type

He doesn’t care much about looks, he really just wants someone who’s fun and loves his family

Extroverts are perfect for him

He would prefer a partner who’s okay with drinking, bc Snezhnaya go brrr (literally)

But if you aren’t comfortable with that, that’s okay

Definitely the most fun to be with if you’re outgoing, so he would want you to be adventurous too

He would also like talkative people, bc then he can listen to you ramble <3

Rule #1 tho: don’t be afraid of him. Treat him like a person, not a weapon

He doesn’t mind being a weapon, but if his partner is soft with him and doesn’t demand anything, that is ideal

I love him sm

I love doing these lmao. It’s kinda cringe, but it’s self indulgent and I like exploring their characters like this

I’m probably gonna create an ask blog specifically for this sometime soon

[nebulapaws]

So, I've been in the middle of a few brainrots lately, and I ended up making a Warrior Cats AU for JJBA, because I'm cringe but I'm free 🔥🔥

I ended up with these designs, and a little bit of information for the characters as well :D and...a fic outline, so that's really fun. I happened to have grown up on furry one piece (Warrior Cats) and I'm sure that's. very obvious LMAO, so I had a LOT of fun with designing and writing Something. I also have a buncha extra doodles too, I guess. I have Buccellati and Abbacchio done, too, but I want to make a separate post for them. Feel free to indulge in my autistic rambling below the cut;

I decided to call this series "Stelli Fortuni", and I sorta slapped it somewhere in the middle of Warrior Cats canon--so there's canon warriors here--because I'm not about to make new clans and the story in Warrior Cats is really interesting and I want to play around in it and I've decided to do that through my autistic little lens, ok?

Part 5's arc would take place in the beginning of the Power of Three (Outcast, specifically) and end during Sunrise.

Also, imagine that Link meme--it's my sleepover and I choose the ___ ? yeah, It's my AU and I choose the culture, and I say these cats have traditions because they're a friggen cat society and also they have sexualities and gender too. this is MY au and I say they're WOKE

(For Giorno, I know the art says Goldenwind, but I changed it last minute because I found the new one fits better).

Giorno - Goldenwish (Riverclan) LaPerm

Small and plump curly furred golden tom with turquoise green eyes. He's quiet and always seems poised. Nobody really knows where he came from, just that he appeared one day in Riverclan's camp as a kitten. Leopardstar decided it'd be best to take him in. It certainly didn't escape her notice that he's got the same strange starkissed mark on his shoulder that Silverfish and Shinekit do. That being said, Giorno has an unusual affinity for plant growth and a kinship with nature.

Buccellati - Stickyfig (Riverclan) Egyptian Mau

Large, lithe white tom with small black spots that look like tadpoles. He's wise, thoughtful and always stands tall. Even as an apprentice, he's always proved to be reliable and he's quite well liked through all the clans. That being said, he's got quite the weird side, as well as a caring and fatherly side. He, along with Tigerfoot, Violethaze, Mandarinflight & Houndsight appeared at the lake during a stormy night. Only Leopardstar and Mistyfoot know why they were out in that stormy night. Starclan has gifted Stickyfig with the uncanny ability to cut through almost anything, a power he uses sparingly.

Trish - Softrose (Riverclan) Turkish Van

Slender rose-ginger and white she-cat with soft green eyes. When she's first allowed into the clan, she's quiet and reserved. She only (hesitantly) talked with Stickyfig and Goldenwish, but later she unwinds a little. She won't admit it out loud, but she's unsettled by the idea of a full prophecy--that would end in lives being lost--hinging on her arrival at all. At first, she truly doesn't even want to be in the clan. Along her journey with the rest of the gang, she warms up to them and, by the end, decides to stay in Riverclan. She's been blessed with the ability to soften anything.

Mista - Tigerfoot (Shadowclan) Caracat

Bulky and well-muscled brown tom with a striped backside, tufted ears and muddy brown eyes. He has six toes on both of his large front paws and five on the back. He's also abnormally large for a cat, and his clanmates joke often that he has wildcat blood in him, or that he must be some kind of mountain cat. This actually isn't that far off. The cats he arrived to the clans with were all cats from a backyard breeder that tried to make domestic wildcats--Caracals, Servals Leopard cats, etc. He doesn't like to think too much on it--he's here now, right? He's devoted, loyal, and very lack-a-daisy. He trusts his physical strength more than his cleverness--but that's not to say he's unintelligent, far from it. Unlike Violethaze, he's quite devout in Starclan, believing that they guide his paws and that, as long as he's true, he'll be safe. Lucky, even. While, at first, it might seem like he's the only "chosen" without powers, he can talk to animals directly. He's bonded with six unruly birds.

(Those birds are, if you're curious, Kingfisher, sparrow, bluejay, mourning dove, woodpecker & a european robin).

Fugo - Violethaze (Shadowclan) Silver-spotted f1 Savannah

Sleek, lithe and a little gangly white tom with unusual silver spotting like a leopard's and fiery violet eyes. He's extremely impatient and short tempered--it's a wonder he became a medicine cat at all. That being said, he's incredibly knowledgeable and good with medicine. He's not just knowledgeable on cures, either, he's also quite knowledgeable on poisons and venoms. He's weary and his clanmates think he's quite prickly and hard to get along with, but Tigerfoot thinks he's the funniest person ever to annoy. His biggest secret is that he has the ability to control illness and disease, which is why he'd such a good medicine cat. He can give what he takes away.

Narancia - Mandarinflight (Thunderclan) American curl

Medium sized calico tabby top with an orange face, tufted and curled ears, and wide and bright violet eyes. He's energetic and passionate, and fiercely skilled as both a warrior and a scout. Out of the band of unique looking cats, he's the one who could pass The Most Normal. When he was younger, he almost died of an eye infection that occurred due to the conditions of the mill--which lead to the group's escape to find help. He was only a kitten at that time, and while he pretends it doesn't affect him it does. He can't see very well out of that eye. He feels like it's his fault that they're all seperated now, but he also doesn't dwell on it much. He's got the ability to jump unusually high for a cat his size and build. He could climb an entire oak tree in a matter of seconds, and he has incredible vision.

Abbacchio - Houndsight (Thunderclan) Maine coon

Silver tom with a dark grey stripe along his head to tail tip. He has two toned eyes, and sallow silken fur. For a cat as young as he is, one would think he carries a moon of sadness across his back. He's very low energy and doesn't engage with his clanmates much. It's hard to become his friend, he's prickly, defensive and tired, but once you do you find that he's quite a loyal and wise, if not old, soul. In addition to being saddled with the guilt of The Horrors (his friend dying for him), he's able to communicate with the dead spirits that show themselves to him. They're able to guide him, but never fully interfere.

I wanted to give them abilities like they have in the show, but abilities that sorta made sense within in the context of Warrior Cats. Though, that makes me wonder, if these powers are supposed to fill in the space that Stands leave behind, does that mean Lionblaze, Jayfeather and Dovewing are examples of in universe canon Stand Users? /silly

This AU is entirely for fun and to get me into writing longer stories that I'll Actually finish. I basically grew up and learnt how to read and write with Warrior Cats, so this is kind of exactly my element. With NaNoWritMo coming up, I'd like to actually try to complete the challenge this year, since writing takes a lot of spoons for an unmedicated ADHD person. That being SAIID it's also perfect drawing inspiration too. Not to brag, but I've drawn so many.....memes. I've yet to draw anything serious, they always end up memes, I'm sick.

Here's some of those;

and as a bonus, I guess, here's an extra (outdated, I changed the design) doodle of how I think Mista would sleep as a cat (ft. Goldenwish and old Violethaze design)

anyways, I'm having a TON of fun with this. I'm not entirely sure if anyone else likes this Specific Niche like me, but I'm having fun so who cares, right?

Anyways, I also have designs for characters outside of Part 5, I'm just especially abnormal about part 5. This AU also changes a lot of key events in the main WC story, like Leopardstar dying earlier, Mistystar also dying earlier and there's more like. traditions and world building than what we get in the actual books (Like, I want to add little festivals, special funeral services for fallen leaders, pilgrimages that medicine cats have to take, etc.) because I think it'd be super fun

Anyways, stay tuned gamers I'll probably not shut up about this /silly

[silvers-not-home]

my lame fucking autistic rambling

here's my massive stupid autistic rant about life series characters and my head canons for them

literally everything i'm thinking about is going on here im not even processing it im just typing sorry for any typos there will be many😭

this is also for my two (2) mutuals who i care for very deeply kiss kiss hug hug <3 /p /gen

okay it's the morning so i'm gonna continue this thumbs up emoji

starting off strong with mr grian minecraft himself (oh wow what a surprise /s)

he tried piercing his own nose in highschool. like. he was THE teenage dirtbag. sneaking out, drinking, smoking, shitty garage band that got nowhere (yes the bad boys was a garage band you c ant change my mind), mcr, pierce the veil, paramore, sexuality and gender crisis, "i know a guy", shoplifting, skipping class, you name it be probably did it with jimmy and joel during freshmen-sophomore year

pearl is his sister, jimmy and lizzie are his cousins (older cousins i should specify. him and pearl are twins but she's the older twin) and they went to the same high school. he met joel through lizzie and jimmy and joel and grian all clicked instantly

joel would stay at jimmy and grians place so much to the point it was like a second home to him and they would all hang out in the basement. joel stayed with his grandparents and helped them out a lot but they passed while he was in his bad boys phase and so he just stayed at grians place a whole lot during his depression (don't worry he's fine now just a little fucked up but they all are)

grian and pearls parents were kinda really shitty (yes i'm also counting yhs lore fuck uou) his whole life and so they got taken by cps and they lived with jimmy and lizzie's parents. and they were much better until he went to japan and all that shit happened (iykyk)

sam made him really realize that like. "oh my fucking god i'm gay. and it's for a damn sociopath. fuck." (that's like half canon)

he and taurtis DID hook up every tuesday thumbs up emoji

his wings didn't start growing in until AFTER senior year (so post japan/yhs incident)

the yhs holds a ceremony thingy for all the people that passed during all that shit and he goes every year and still has rowens glasses and ran into taurtis one year and it was awkward as HELLL but like. it wasn't an awful experience neither of them knew what to say. especially taurtks is bc by then grians wings had already fully grown in and his ass DID NOT recognize him💀

oh yeah also the four of the cousins are all winged animals so grians a parrot, pearl is a moth but like she's one of the super fluffy one (i forgot what they're called), jimmy is a canary (for obvious reasons), and lizzie is a flamingo because. fuck it (also half canary too it's from their mom) but she doesn't have as many features as the others

they all grow feathers (except for pearl) when they're stressed or feel a heightened emotion and have the little winged ears. they still do have actual ears but they grew in behind they're human ears and pearl has the little antennae things on top of her head. lizzie's kind of blends into her hair since yk. pink on pink and they're more folded then fanned out(?) if that makes sense?😭

jimmy was an early bloomer while grian was a late bloomer (i'm talking about wing/feather wise)

also some little sexuality/gender headcanons those are always fun :3

grians definitely trans masc and mlm (he/him anything else gives him dysphoria)

jimmy is THE bisexual demiboy icon (he/they)

lizzie is also bisexual (she/they)

pearl is a NONBINARY LESBIANNNN SHOUT OHT YO ALL MY NONBINARY LESBIANS WOOOO (she also uses any pronouns that would be considered feminine/androgynous or basically just. anything other then he/him/anything masculine)

mumbo is ace and omni (they/he)

scar is pan and a demiboy (all pronouns. like seriously he's collecting them like pokémon cards)

tango is bi and TRANSMASC WOOOO SHOUT OUT TO ALL MY TRANSMASC PEOPLE OUT THERE (he/they/flame)

martyn is transmasc and unlabeled. he doesn't want one/or thinks any is fit for him but is on the aspec (he/him)

scott is just. gay. goddamn fa- (he/him)

also just thought abt something grian jimmy and joel all had matching (infected and now faded) stick and poke tattoos that read "bad boys, today, tomorrow and yesterday" but that last part is faded completely since they ran out of pen ink halfway through and jimmys mom came home and they didn't wanna get in trouble (also yes their tattoos are in the same spot as each others it's on the right side of their chest) and let me TELL YOU. lizzie makes fun of joel TO THIS DAY about that tattoo and she likes to trace the words with her finger sometimes when they're cuddling, humming their old songs (he hates it but she still thinks it's absolutely adorable)

grian and mumbo are middle school best friends and he knows everything that happened to grian when he was in japan

grian, scar and mumbo all went to the same high school and mumbo and scar tried making a baking club called (you're never gonna believe this) the buttercups but grian was supposedly "too cool for that fairy shit" but would hang out during lunch with them and go to the meetings and help buy the ingredients and also help bake with them for extra credit and so would jimmy and joel. for extra credit of course

tango, mumbo and impulse were all in the computer club and coding club in highschool. doc was their teacher and cub was the senior teachers assistant trying to get early college credit

jimmy had the FATTEST crush on tango while they were in high school (yes they all went to the same highschool shut up) and tried impressing him by "making" a robot (mumbo made it and gave him the remote and told him to push two single buttons) and he pushed them in the wrong order and it short circuited and it almost exploded. he got suspended for a month and the only reason he didn't get expelled was because tango said it was his and it was a project. he complemented "jimmys" robot and said it had nice coding and a bunch of other nerd /aff terms that didn't make ANY sense to jimmy (that was his way of confessing but jimmys too stupid /aff to understand it at the moment so tango thought he didn't like him back) and when jimmy was talking to grian and joel about it they were yelling at him about how "JIMMY YOU IDIOT HE LIKES YOU BACK" and "WHAT'D YOU SAY? YOU SAID YOU LIKED HIM TOO RIGHT?" to which he (of course) responded with

"NO?? I DONT SPEAK NERD JOEL HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW??"

also tango wears a feather jimmy gave to him as an earring and has kept that earring since they started going out which was like sophomore year or smth like that

they also had an exact conversation to joel before lizzie asked him out (and she also proposed too fight me)

i can go on for HOURS about those three but i'm gonna a do stuff about martyn now because. omg. he drives me CRAZY

also just realizing how most of these are just high school head canons. sorry (no i'm not)

everyone in school always thought that the bad boys were the mean bullies bc they wore leather jackets and studs and cuffs and blah blah blah but in reality they were just the dorky, socially anxious losers that were loud in class because they all adhd. not because they were asshole

martyn and scott were the ones you had to worry about (mostly scott actually but martyn would be a passive aggressive bully)

those little twits had an actual burn book. martyn. the almost loser that pierced his own ears, causing them to get infected but refused to take them out because he wanted to match with his fellow mean gill and wore anime shirts to sleep and doc martins (only because they had his name in it dont praise him he was a loser /aff) wrote "annoying dorks" in the burn book page dedicated to the bad boys. he had NO ROOM to talk and i find that hilarious bc him and jimmy were actually really close and he ate the page. yes. he ate the page in front of scott's face after an argument to prove a point and scott has never respected another person more in his life

i also felt like it was important that martyn and scott got voted prom king and queen

martyn LOVES necklaces, rings, bracelets. he has a matching necklace and/or bracelet with all his four (4) friends that consisted of scott and the bad boys. he still has them as an adult and holds onto the charm when he misses them which is all the time (i love martyn angst evil laugh)

ykw fuck it he still wears the necklaces and tucks them under his shirt, he asked everyone else if they still had theirs and it either broke or they lost it

EVERYOEN EXCEPT FOR JIMMY BC THEY WERE CHILDHOOD BEST FRIENDS AND HE WEARS IT UNDER HIS SHIRT TOO FUCK YOU I LOVE THEM

and for anyone curious it was a dog bone that is split in half and it like one of those magnetic necklaces that you have to get uncomfortably close to eachother for it to work

okay that's enough for tonight bc i have things i need to do tomorrow and thumbs hurt and it threw in the morning and i've been typing for over an hour straight good night cleveland *proceeds to stay online for another hour*

[drdemonprince]

thanks for saying what you have about covert incest. I have this memory of my dad that I won't even type out cuz it's just horrible and I haven't been able to determine if it actually happened or if it's a memory of a dream I had but part of me thinks the former cuz I don't think I could've imagined something so horrible. and he died recently and I was determined to find some kind of physical evidence that it really happened but when my mom was moving she got rid of most of his stuff before I got there and I've been so pissed about it but not able to tell her or anyone why and it just reinforces my upset toward her cuz if it really happened then she didn't protect me and goes out of her way to protect him instead but in reading your posts I'm starting to think that whether it actually happened or not doesn't matter, the feelings are there and they're real and I ought to just treat it as though it really happened. anyway sorry to be vague, this has just been a huge weight on me and I feel like finding your blog on here has been such a blessing, especially cuz this has been weighing on me even more lately cuz I've been identifying as a butch lesbian for awhile but have been wondering if I'm actually a bi trans man and have been wanting to explore sexual experiences with queer men to find out if I'd enjoy it but have been really cautious about it and haven't really tried anything yet cuz I'm scared of what it might bring up in me and I'm autistic too so the whole dating and hookup thing is scary to me even without this memory shit and idk if queer men would be interested in me anyway. but yeah I'm gonna explore those resources you shared when I'm ready and I just wanted you to know you're making a difference even through sharing your experiences on your tumblr blog. and also just wanted to confess all this to somebody so thank you for that too

<3 thanks Anon.

Your feelings and traumatized reactions are real, and your vague sense of a memory almost certainly signals that Something was not Right in the dynamic with your father, and you can stand by that and care for yourself as someone whose boundaries have been trammeled upon even if you never get to know the exact facts of what happened. So much of childhood disappears down the memory hole, and there is no easy accounting for it, but as a therapist once wisely said to me, if a person has a fracture that's consistent with a violent attack, you can often see the effects and care for them even if you can't know exactly what happened there.

I'm glad you're feeling open to the idea of exploring your own sexuality and gender identity, too. There are absolutely queer men, both trans and cis, who will be interested in you, and you can move at the pace that works for you. Remember there are no rules to queer sexuality, that's the whole point -- so you never have to try anything you don't want to do. You can have a rich, fulfilling sex life with men that never involves PIV, if you aren't interested in that, or that is completely dependent upon a kink dynamic that isn't directly sexual. or you can just put yourself on the grindr grid and find some guy who wants to give you a massage or eat you out all day. There's so many kinds of very eager people out there, and so you can be as selective and as firm in your boundaries and vetting as you need to be! There's every kind of person out there. I have some guy in my Fetlife DMs right now who only wants to shave my body; another who only wants to jerk off while watching me smell leather. The world is abundant with funny little opportunities.