#he’s potentially the most genuine and open of the boys and I find that really brave and wonderful

[professorlegaspi]

Kitt is the only guy in Celia’s friend group who’s not described as having a mask

[itsclydebitches]

We've all rightly been gushing over Trent listening in on the parent-teacher conference and there are a lot of cool interpretations for why he'd eavesdrop: a crush on Ted, a tendency towards gossip (as seen in "International Break"), the fact that you just can't take the journalism out of the boy, Trent is clearly picking up personal tidbits for the book if the group's initial "Don't print that" worries are any indication, etc. So yeah, it's clear why he'd want/be okay with the door staying open.

Meanwhile, I'm slightly feral over Ted letting the door stay open and what that conveys to Trent.

Based on what we've picked up about his personal life and the direction of this season, we have good reason to believe that Trent was a deeply isolated man prior to Ted arriving. His job makes enemies simply by virtue of the profession itself, especially when you "bring the heat" as hard as he did. Roy flipping the press off at the gala in Season 1 and Nate sneaking out at dark this last episode shows us how journalists are treated on the regular: ignored, dismissed, told to "fuck off" as a matter of course. That's often well deserved, as Roy's two personal stories (Trent's article about him + the response to Isaac's attack) attest, but the end result is still a profession that alienates you from anyone other than your peers. When you're a "colossal prick" in your articles, people hate you all the more.

So Trent at least has other journalist buddies, yeah? Well, not that we've seen. I always think back to that chorus of "--The Independent" in the press room when everyone knew what Trent was going to say and how it... wasn't entirely fun ribbing. I think there's a fair bit of mockery there. Even if others disagree, I doubt that was received well by someone who wears their professionalism as an armor, who takes off his glasses as soon as they're complimented, who was, notably, closeted into his 40s. Trent is a man who is deeply aware of how others perceive him (pointing out his "vibe" feels quite calculated now: highlight what you want people to notice rather than waiting for them to find something on their own) and he is likely to read the worst of most interactions. Cue his shocked, "You really mean that, don't you?" when faced with someone like Ted who is not only genuinely nice, but blunt about it in a way that Trent can't misunderstand, or brush off via denial.

What's his home life like? Married to a woman when he's gay and that's putting a serious strain on them both. He tries to come out and isn't believed. The only other family members we know about are a toddler (who, while lovely I'm sure, can't provide Trent with the kind of emotional support an adult needs) and a father who, if we read the series through Lance's headcanons, may not have been very supportive of his son. Who else does Trent know? Uhhh... other subjects who hate him? Owners like Rebecca who want to use him? A random, potential date that he felt so little for he ditched to get a quote?

(EDIT: I can't believe I forgot to mention the strong implications that Ted was bullied in childhood/as a teenager, based on how he reacts to the whole of the club ignoring him -- resigned but unsurprised -- his reaction to Roy telling him to fuck off after he tries to mend that relationship -- disappointedly awkward "I can't believe I even tried that. What was I thinking?" -- and his body language during the locker room scene -- jumping, furtive glances towards Ted, backed up against the shower stall because shit, he's been in this situation before.

So uh, yeah. Trent may not have had a lot of friends growing up either! That was not the response of a social butterfly, but rather someone who is already very used to being ignored/dismissed/cursed out/threatened, not just within his profession, but within the school-like atmosphere of Richmond's family too.)

I'm by no means reinventing the meta wheel here, but Trent has truly undergone a STAGGERING transformation in Season 3 and the result of that is the reframing of his Season 1 and 2 scenes as, frankly, more depressing than they originally seemed. Seeing him now smiling, singing, gossiping, dressing just in t-shirts, casually snacking, making jokes, letting go enough to be a complete, hyperactive "dork" in front of others... it just hammers home how deeply unhappy Trent was before. How closed off. How closeted--in more ways than one.

So what must it mean to someone like Trent for Ted to leave the door open?

It's not just an open invitation towards community--sit near me, listen in, quietly participate, there's literally no barrier between us--but a staggeringly personal one too. I don't care if a 10-ish year old failing science is inconsequential in the grand scheme of things, the fact remains that letting anyone hear a parent-teacher conference with your ex is a hell of a show of trust. That would mean a lot to Trent in general, this acknowledgement that someone trusts the ex-prick journalist with that amount of personal information, but Ted in particular? Oh boy. Ted is the one Trent betrayed with that article! And yeah, Ted forgave him the instant he learned of it, but Trent himself was obviously feeling a lot of guilt, hence him burning his source and orchestrating a firing. Toss in the fact that Ted, despite being a VERY open man on the regular (I still laugh at his "I don't mind" to Rebecca when over-sharing about Michelle) has in fact denied Trent information in the past. No, I won't tell you that was a panic attack. Yes, I will continue the lie that it was food poisoning. Perhaps for Ted it was less about Trent knowing and more about anyone getting at the truth, but at the end of the day it amounts to the same: there was a time when Ted did not fully trust him and Trent justified that fear by writing the very article Ted was looking to avoid, even if Trent approached that situation with as much grace as he could.

So this moment, beyond the humor, just makes my brain go !!!!!! for Trent. Ted Lasso, of all people, has left the door open for Trent Crimm, also of all people, to hear the messy details of his, Henry, and Michelle's life. He is not at all afraid that this information will be spun in a bad light--Local Gaffer's Son Suffers While Father Plays at Coach Across the Pond--despite the fact that Trent is actively writing a book about him. Trent himself is so unguarded in this moment, dressed only in a t-shirt, playing around with his orange, making little quips. The Trent of Season 1 would NEVER. I mean, I think we see small glimpses of the real Trent back then, especially when Ted amuses him enough to coax his guard down for half a second (Trent's reaction to “Make like Dunst and Union and bring it on, baby!" comes to mind. That's a gesture we're seeing a lot now that he's comfortable around the club), but on the whole he was still so, so, so isolated. No one knew the real him: gay, funny, dorky, inquisitive, longing for companionship and using the artificial 'closeness' of journalism to cover that ache up.

Now? Trent is fully a part of the Richmond community and he knows he's a part of it because everyone--Ted, Beard, Roy, Colin, Rebecca--are going out of their way to tell him that, notably in very overt ways. Trent strikes me as someone who wouldn't fully believe it when he's told someone enjoys his company; the kind of wounded, anxiety-prone person who, if casually invited to participate, would assume they're just being polite and he'd actually be an annoyance to them. Trent needs overt, obvious, beat-you-over-the-head-with-it reassurance, which is why Ted is so very good for him because Ted is composed of THE most over-the-top positivity you've ever seen. (Compare that need of Trent's to Michelle thinking that Ted is too much...) When faced with a defensive journalist Ted says explicitly that he liked spending time with Trent. When faced with a still unsure writer who thinks of himself only as an observer--never a part of the team himself--Ted literally begs with monkey noises to hear Trent's opinions. He's blunt to the point of absurdity and someone like Trent who has likely spent the majority of his life hiding/being told that his true self is inadequate needs that level of constant, neon-light reassurance.

So Ted leaves the door open to a personal conversation, refusing to literally bar Trent from his life. The best part? Colin re-opens the door because he understands Trent and he knows his coach; of course Ted wants him included. Colin asks permission to CLOSE the door, not open it, and Trent is seeing this openness again and again over the course of several months, with each episode bringing him further out of his shell as he slowly unlearns that self-doubt. Yes, please stay, please tell us what you think, please offer your advice, please join our Diamond Dogs, please ask us questions (they're no longer perceived as a threat), please become an integral part of our lives. We trust you and we like you and we want you here.

Everyone's waiting for Trent to catch the door again because, you know, the rule of three, but what if he doesn't need to? What if he's past slipping a hand or a foot through the crack and scraping by on what that gets him? He caught the door before it could close to get closer to Colin. He caught the door before it could close to get closer to Ted. Now they've both kept the door open for him, his presence welcomed from the get-go.

Trent doesn't need to sprint for that opening anymore.

[consumeroflemoans]

For the character break down since he's been in the public conscience, Sunday? Also Aventurine so we have the classic?

I DIDNT SEE THIS ASK OMG

Sunday

- How I feel about him?

Augh I love love love his character so much. He’s such a fascinating exploration of the trauma and grooming that can sometimes come from religious institutions. He’s a deeply flawed person that I just want to see improve

- Who do I ship with him?

Stellar question to ask the multishipper I have a few

Sunheng - This most recent quest really opened my eyes to this ship. Dan Heng and Sunday have parallel plots of redemption. They both have been made criminals in their own homes after doing something they believed was right. Dan Heng is further along in his character arc, so he could potentially help Sunday with his own development, helping him find his own purpose. Also they’re on the Astral Express together now (:

Sunturine - These absolute divas. The conversation between Order Sunday and Aventurine had my toxic yaoi bells ringing. I’ve talked about this before, but they are amazing foils for each other. Sunday is lowkey obsessed with Aventurine’s surface level frivolity, it was even mentioned in his argument against himself. The dynamic of the (metaphorical) straight man x the frivalous flirt is so fun. Also “It’s Sunday, the most handsome man in Penacony” plays in my head constantly.

Sunday x Caelus/Stelle - Now I don’t ship the Trailblazer with a lot of people, but this is one situation where I think it would work. Penacony was supposed to be a vacation for them and it turned into arguably one of the most traumatic experiences of their life. The dynamic between a villain searching for redemption and the one that defeated them in the first place is really fun to explore and I think there could be good angst.

- Non-romantic OTP?

Oh my god Sunday and Robin. Their sibling dynamic brings me life and the newest quest nearly made me cry. Sunday has been so dependent on Robin acting as the light in his life and he’s finally recognizing that he needs to secure his own independence. They love each other so much I hope they see each other again

- Unpopular opinion?

I’ve touched on this before but I don’t think Sunday has changed all that much yet. I’ve seen a bit of discourse surrounding the farewell quest because it’s frankly confusing at times. This quest wasn’t about him becoming a whole new person, it’s about him finally accepting that he can’t change the past. He can only move forward and work to improve himself

- One thing I wish would happen/had happened

Please please hoyoverse I am on my knees give Sunday more interactions with the Astral Express crew. I’m well aware he’s only a passenger but he could have so many interesting conversations with them. I was really hoping the room event had Sunday included. It makes sense why he isn’t but I’m still kind of sad

Aventurine

- How I feel about him?

Obsessed with this character. He’s my husband. He’s my darling little boy. He kicked off the growing trend of us really getting to see the plot from character’s perspectives and I think they did a phenomenal job exploring his trauma.

- Who do I ship with him?

*clears throat* Dr. Veritas Ratio. *the crowd goes wild*

I do think they have a fun dynamic. Once again the straight man character plays well off Aventurine gambling on everything. It’s also nice to see a character that genuinely cares. Someone who can say, no, stop, this is actively harming you. Ratio also doesn’t say that in the most polite way, but I think it makes them fun.

Also Sunturine again (:

- Non-romantic OTP?

Aventurine and Topaz! I really like to think of them as best friends. They’re lowkey bad influences on each other, but they work well together. There’s a lot of fun concepts for workplace shenanigans also with them working together as Stonehearts.

- Unpopular opinion?

I don’t think it’s an unpopular opinion but tbh I’ve seen a lot of people mischaracterize Aventurine as being incredibly reckless. His entire theming is based around gambling but he’s actually an extremely calculating character. He had an intricate plan on Penacony with multiple backup plans to fall back on. He’s very smart with his plans and knows how to make things go his way. That’s why he’s good at what he does.

- One thing I wish would happen/had happened

Proper Aventurine/Boothill team up when. I need to see them take down the IPC together. They’ve both lost their homes, their families, and their autonomy to them. I need this for my soul

[ivymarquis]

The B.A.G. Coalition

Did I use one of my work breaks on my 14hr shift to write this? Yes, yes I did. I also took time out of my day to make sure my introduction to the COD MWII fandom was a crack!fic despite promising angst with Ghost and simping from Price. Both of which are still coming.

Tags; platonic 141 + Reader, crack fic, drinking, weaponization of barrack bunnies, dunking on Graves.

I don’t know how the military works and I don’t care to learn.

You try really, really hard to not fixate too much on the whole being a woman in the boy’s club thing because you’ll drive yourself insane if you do.

You’re good at your job, you’re not getting preferential treatment, and all is right in the world. Your team was cautious, gauging your capabilities but ultimately warming up to you and welcoming you into the fold.

A mission planned with 141 and Shadow company means that Graves is a tolerated interloper into the group.

Everyone is settled into a booth in the corner of a pub near base, a few drinks in as the night wears on. You are finally feeling settled in and like your feet are firmly underneath you and you’re no longer treading water, watching your back as the other 141 assess you.

And it’s the exact moment when Graves asks “Are you seeing anybody?” that you realize you’ve girlbossed entirely too close to the fucking sun.

The table’s reaction is immediate. Your “I beg your pardon?” is muffled by Ghost’s “Sod off, Graves,” Soap’s “She’s been fucking drinking” and Gaz shooting him a look while Price clears his throat with a pointed “Commander?”

Good to know your team has your back because what the fuck.

“Not like that,” you’re not entirely certain if he’s back peddling or being genuine, “I don’t know what it is but none of the women around this base date. It’s like pulling teeth.”

“Really?” Gaz asks. “I haven’t been having any issues.”

Your eyebrow arches, reaching for your drink as you realize there’s not enough alcohol in the world for this conversation. “Yeah no ever since the B.A.G. Coalition was formed, you’re gonna have to download Tinder or something, Commander” You speak without thinking, a look of horror dawning on you that the alcohol has loosened your lips a little too much. Well, shit.

“The what?” Graves asks incredulously.

You panic, reflex having you turn towards Price. “Please get me out of here,” you plead with him.

“Oh no can do, Sergeant.”

You cling to your glass like a buoy. “I’ve said too much,” you whisper.

“What the hell is the B.A.G. Coalition?” Graves asks again.

Taking a long draught of your drink, you steel yourself for both this conversation and the potential wrath of the bunnies now the open secret was out.

“Have you… noticed how the barrack bunnies don’t have anything to do with you?”

His eyebrows draw together. “Guess I never bothered to worry about it. Not like they’re hard to find,”

That last sentence had some teeth to it that you did not appreciate. Especially coming from a man who’s managed to piss off an entire base of them. “Hey now, I love the bunnies, you gotta be nice to them,” you admonish before remembering yourself and quickly adding a “Sir”.

The alcohol has your mind drifting away from the question at hand and going slightly to the left- still focused on the bunnies, but no longer directly leading to the coalition.

“They do important work and make my life easier when some guy is being obnoxious and won’t leave me alone,” you elaborate. “Also most of them are really nice and I don’t blame them for having a type and staying focused on it. I admire the commitment and tenacity.”

“Wait who was bothering you?” Price would hone in on that part.

“No one anymore, after I weaponized one of the bunnies and pointed her in his direction.”

“You…. Weaponized a barrack bunny?” Soap sounded out the idea, clearly having some image of a tactical assault bunny in mind.

“Yes I did. It was absolutely incredible. Poor guy never saw her coming- it was like watching a lioness take down a wounded gazelle.”

“A bunny battalion,” Gaz sighs into his drink, his pupils damn near in the shape of hearts at whatever image his brain was conjuring.

“What the fuck do barrack bunnies have to do with this coalition you’re talking about,” Graves tries to redirect the question.

Shit. Right.

Like, you get why he’s confused. From his perspective at least. Tall, blonde, conventionally attractive with a southern drawl most girls would go gaga over, not to mention the commander of Shadow Company. He should be having women chase him from all over. And here he was with no bitches and getting zero play.

And yet none of those attributes were actually indicative of him like… being a good person. Graves soured you like 3 day old sweet tea. There was something both saccharine and bitter about him all wrapped together even if you didn’t know for sure what the problem was.

“You did something to piss off the bunnies. I don’t know what and frankly I'm afraid to ask. Like, I thought maybe some supreme pick me bunny would rise from the ranks and make her move anyway but they have made a united front. It is both impressive and terrifying,” you’ve got just enough alcohol in your system that fuck it, let’s tell a superior officer a little something about himself that he clearly doesn’t know. “And the rest of us noticed. So it slowed the not-bunnies rolls too.”

There’s a beat of silence before the lightbulb clicks in Ghost’s head and he is busting out laughing. You don’t think you’ve heard him ever make that much noise even when he’s grousing out orders.

Gaz is the next one for the lightbulb to go off, verbalizing what B.A.G. stood for to a stupified Commander (and equally stunned Soap and Price).

“It’s Bunnies Against Graves!”

[icycoldninja]

Perhaps writing the DMC men catching the reader singing to herself when she thought that she was alone while hanging clothes out to dry

She’s not exactly shy but she’s not exactly bold either, just somewhere in between but for singing…deadass not wanting to sing anywhere publicly, which results in her awkwardly sitting in a karaoke booth with her frunk friends hyping her up and she’s just “-_-“

So when they said they’ll be out to get groceries or go on a mission, she takes this time to sing to herself:

1/ Dante: Would That I - Hozier

2/ Vergil: Brooklyn Baby - Lana Del Rey

3/ Nero: La Vie En Rose - Edith Paif

4/ V: I’m a fool to want you - Frank Sinatra

Yeah, OK. Here ya go.

Sparda boys + V x Singing!Reader headcannons

¤ Dante ¤

-Dante knew you were pretty closed off in terms of singing, as whenever he took you out for karaoke nights with the rest of the DMC crew, you would just sit in the booth, watching as he and probably Nero screamed their drunken heads off.

-He assured you just couldn't sing or were just too nervous to do it in front of others, and he respected that.

Then he happened to walk out on you singing to yourself while hanging up your laundry.

-"And it's not tonight Where I'm set alight And I blink in sight Of your blinding light Oh, it's not tonight Where you hold me tight Light the fire bright Oh, let it blaze, alright

Oh, but you're good to me Oh, you're good to me Oh, but you're good to me, baby"

-Dante was stunned to hear you could sing like this, and ended up stealthily following you outside when you did your laundry, just to hear you sing.

-At some point he couldn't control himself any longer and decided to sing along with you, nearly giving you a heart attack.

■ Vergil ■

-Vergil was never one to be nosy, so if you choose not to sing around others, then that's your problem, and not his.

-He doesn't make any assumptions or anything about why you choose not to sing in public, because he genuinely doesn't care.

-He can't sing to save his life, but would sooner die than have you know that, so he'll keep his mouth shut.

-At one point he walked outside, where you were hanging up laundry, only to find you belting out some tunes.

-"Well, my boyfriend's in a band He plays guitar while I sing Lou Reed I've got feathers in my hair I get down to Beat poetry And my jazz collection's rare I can play most anything I'm a Brooklyn baby I'm a Brooklyn baby

Ta-da-da-da-da-da-da Ta-da-da-da-da-da-da Pa-ta-da-da-da-da"

-Vergil has to admit, he's impressed. He's not gonna follow you around to hear your singing, but he will leave the window open so he can quietly listen in without fear of getting caught.

□ Nero □

-Nero enjoyed singing himself, though he only ever showcased this ability when Dante dragged him out for a get-together with the others, where he would inevitably drink too much beer and lose his self control.

-He won't pressure you into doing something so potentially embarrassing, so whether you want to sing in front of him or not is entirely up to you.

-He is a little bit curious, however. Do you have a hidden talent that you're too nervous to show, or do you suck really bad?

-He happened to be taking a stroll outside when he caught wind of singing that wasn't coming from a pair of speakers. It was coming from a person, and that person was you, singing Edith Paif.

-"Des nuits d'amour à plus finir Un grand bonheur qui prend sa place Des ennuis, des chagrins s'effacent Heureux, heureux à en mourir"

(Translation from Google: Nights of endless love, a great happiness that takes its place. Troubles, sorrows fade away. Happy, happy to die)

-Nero didn't understand a word of what you were saying, but that didn't matter cause your voice was epic as hell.

● V ●

-V doesn't sing, since his voice isn't exactly made for that, but he would love to hear you sing.

-He is a tad bit disappointed that you don't want to sing, but everyone has their aversions and such, so he let it go.

-He happened to be passing by the open kitchen window, outside of which you were hanging up the laundry, and heard your singing for the first time.

-"I'm a fool to want you I'm a fool to want you To want a love that can't be true A love that's there for others too"

-V was pleasantly surprised that you'd decide to sing outside, doing such a mundane task, and was also quite happy since his wish had finally been granted.

-Since he happened to love the song you were singing, he couldn't help himself and began singing along, startling you with his raspy, mummy-with-a-sore-throat singing.

[pipipyuni]

hii! could i request a lo’ak x fem!metkayina!reader who like just absolutely LOVES his hands. like, will just hold his pinky whenever he feels bad about it, and genuinely just thinks it is the coolest thing? (bit strange ik but anyways 😇) <33

With These Hands, I'll Give you the World

wc: 1105

gender: fem

cw(s): none! all fluff

pairing: lo'ak x metkayina!reader

an: shimmy shimmy yay shimmy yay shimmy ya--anyway, i love lo'ak!!

content can be read below the cut!

All Lo’ak wanted to do was help out a little around the village, really. What he wasn’t expecting was to run into you, the pretty daughter of a fairly well-respected fisherman, much less for you to ask for his help.

He’d seen you around before, sure, but he never really got the chance to actually, well, talk to you before. Between his swimming lessons and other misadventures, he hadn’t found much time to explore the village.

So when he finds you struggling to pull in what seems to be a fishing net, he can’t help but want to offer his assistance.

“Need some help there?”

Your head jerks toward him, eyes wide with shock as your mouth hangs open dumbly. With flattened ears and a downcast gaze, you offer him a small nod, moving over to make some room beside you on the net.

He finds the evident blush on your cheeks adorable despite his own cheeks being set ablaze. It’s only when you turn to him questioningly does he clear his throat and turn his gaze back to the heavy net.

Three tugs is all it takes for the two of you to pull the net from the water. It’s full of flopping fish and the occasional seaweed, but your eyes sparkle with joy nonetheless.

“Thank you so much!” Your smile is blinding, rendering Lo’ak almost speechless if not for the small choked hum of agreement that falls pathetically from his throat. He raises one of his hands to bashfully rub the nape of his neck–a habit he picked up from Neteyam in their younger years.

Your gaze follows his hand, and you gasp once your eyes land on the extra finger. He freezes at the sound of your gasp, trailing your line of sight back to his hand. He can feel his jaw clench as shame bubbles deep within his gut. 

He didn’t choose to be born different, and if he did have the choice, he sure as hell wouldn’t have chosen to have extra fingers of all things.

Though, he can’t help but feel sad at the thought of losing yet another potential friend.

Stupid fucking pinky. What kind of name is that anyway?! Who in their right mind–

“No wonder you’re so strong!”

What…? He snaps his scowl away from the sand only to find you beaming and practically shaking from excitement. Your eyes are so wide with curiosity and bright that he feels as though even a thousand suns pale in comparison.

“That’s so cool! Sometimes I wish I had an extra finger… It would help with weaving, I think? I don’t know. Maybe it does, maybe it doesn’t. Do you weave? I like weaving, it’s relaxing! Especially nets, they’re my favorite. They’re just so easy–oh, Great Mother, am I rambling again? Father says I have a problem with talking too much when I’m excited.”

Upon noticing his silence, you bring your hands to your mouth in order to stop yourself from uttering another word. 

Oh no, had you offended him?! That wasn’t your intention, truly. How inconsiderate of you! The poor boy has probably heard enough about his hands, and there you go, most likely furthering his insecurity!

Through your admittedly dramatized inner monologue, you fail to notice the slow flick of his tail, or how his ears flatten against the side of his head, coated with the same purple hue that dusts his cheeks. 

“You think they’re cool?” His voice is barely above a whisper as if he’s afraid to ask–like his ears had lied to him, or something of the sort. There’s a glimmer in his eyes that you can’t quite place.

Infatuation? Adoration? 

Regardless, you nod fervently, smiling brightly despite your flushed and strained cheeks. Lo’ak watches your reactions carefully, the shame in his gut blooming into something lighter—something that catches his throat and clenches his heart painfully.

Cute. The thought returns at full force at the sight of your smile. His mouth parts, a small smile unintentionally tugging at the ends of his lips. He brings his hand from behind his neck, flipping between his palm and the back of his hand.

“Yeah…I guess it is.”

Your giggle is a symphony to his ears, and for once, Lo’ak feels seen as more than the boy with demon blood, or Toruk Makto’s son.

Before you part, the net of fish carefully thrown over your shoulder, Lo’ak catches your free wrist.

“I, uh, never caught your name,” he unintentionally tightens his grip around your wrist as he waits with a bated breath.

“[Name]… My name is [Name].”

—

Bonus:

Alone, and in the safety of his family’s marui, Lo’ak finds himself staring longingly at his pinky fingers. 

“...Lo’ak!” Kiri stands in front of him, her hands planted on her hips as exasperation paints her features. Seeing her brother finally look up from his hands, Kiri lets her hands fall limply to her side, softly sighing as she takes a seat by her brother on the floor. “I’ve been calling you for at least two minutes, skxawng.”

She looks down at her hands, inspecting them, just as Lo’ak had been doing just moments prior. There’s nothing off about them, to her, at least. With pursed lips and furrowed brows, she turns her gaze back to her brother. Once again, she finds him staring longingly, though, this time it’s out a window. 

Kiri smirks knowingly, “So, who’s the unlucky person?” She grabs his shoulders, shaking him lightly. Lo’ak brushes her hands off, a scowl pulling on his lips as he hisses at his sister. Kiri’s smirk falls into a soft smile at her brother’s sudden bashfulness, pulling at his downturned cheek, earning yet another hiss from him.

Swatting her hands away, Lo’ak blushes, “No one!”

“No one, huh?” She points outside the window at someone. At you. “Then why were you staring at her, skxawng?”

There’s a beat of silence between the two before Kiri stands, stretching her arms above her head before ruffling Lo’ak’s hair, “I was going to ask if you wanted to swim, but it’s clear you’ve got things to sort through on your own.”

“You aren’t as slick as you think, little brother.” She winks, snorting slightly at his wide eyes, “Buut, if you want my advice, I say go for it. I’m pretty sure I heard Tsireya talking to her about a crush…”

“You were eavesdropping?!”

She leaves promptly without answering his question, sticking out her tongue playfully one last time before she’s fully out the door.

Once again alone, Lo’ak stares at his hands.

…Maybe his extra fingers were a blessing in disguise.

©pyuni 2022 — do not copy, steal, repost, or translate any of my works on tumblr or any other site

[masterlist]

[beomgyuslilracha]

the ceo's son ✧.* [ pt. 5 ]

⊹ pairing: choi soobin x f! reader

⊹ genre: strangers to friends to potential lovers (?)

⊹ warnings: very mild swearing again. the absolute smallest of angst, i guess ??

⊹ wc: 3.3k

summary: you've been an intern at c company for roughly over four months now - directly under the ceo as his assistant. everything was going perfectly: you were saving up money to attend uni next year, and you knew that you were under the ceo's good graces to receive a great recommendation when the time came! in fact, he took a liking to you so much that he'd often joke that he wanted to set you up with his son.

at least ... you thought it was a joke.

the night already felt dreadfully long.

you had only been out of the apartment with chaewon for maybe half an hour, but you wished more than anything to just go back and hide yourself under your covers.

had it not been for your best friend's insistence, you surely would have been staring desperately at your phone all night - waiting for a certain someone to finally talk to you.

your hand reached to your back pocket ... then your other pocket ... then through your purse. where was your phone?? in a small panic, you began searching every crevice you could manage only to come to the realization that you had completely left your phone at home.

what if soobin was messaging you?! what if he wanted to see you like he said-

no, wait.. he didn't actually say he would. he said if he 'wasn't busy'.

"hey, y/n!"

chaewon's voice suddenly called for your attention, finally drawing you from the dark depths of where your mind was quickly leading you. you noticed a boy following beside her, and you assumed this had to be the 'great guy' she told you about.

"this is my friend, wooyoung! we met last year during a contemporary dance class."

you smiled shyly, shaking the boy's hand while chaewon introduced you both. you couldn't help but to note that he was most definitely more attractive than you had originally expected.

you figured maybe chaewon was trying to oversell her friend to raise your expectations ... turns out he surpassed them anyway.

"alright, you two go ahead and get to know each other while i go get the tickets for everyone!"

with that being said, leaving you two alone, chaewon walked off to the rest of the friend group that you all were here with tonight.

originally, chaewon had suggested setting you up with wooyoung for a date with only the two of you that night. after expressing how nervous you'd be if you were left alone with him, on top of the fact that you weren't entirely ready to go on a solo date, she changed the plans to a group movie date instead.

although, she still devised her own arrangements to ensure that you and wooyoung were alone together for the majority of the night.

"so contemporary dance, huh? that's interesting," you commented, hoping to strike a conversation before any awkward silence could settle.

"yeah, i'm really fascinated by dancing. believe it or not, i actually wanted to become an idol for a while, since i just loved the feeling of being on stage," wooyoung explained to you, his smile growing contagious as he spoke. you could tell that he was genuinely passionate about the subject and not just talking about it in an attempt to impress you.

"really? well what happened?" you asked him curiously.

"ahh, nothing, really," he shrugged, using one hand to scratch the back of his head awkwardly. "i auditioned and auditioned, but i never got scouted or picked up by any companies."

though you could tell that he was trying to remain nonchalant about the matter, you got a deep sense that the memory still saddened him as he thought back to it.

you opened up your mouth to speak, hoping to find something comforting to say to cheer him up, but was interrupted by chaewon calling to you guys.

"hey, so bad news," she started, though you could tell that she was so obviously fighting a smile. "we couldn't get seats altogether, so, if you guys are okay with it, these two seats in the back are up for grabs?"

you exchanged looks with wooyoung, both of you holding a silent conversation about whether or not the other was okay with the sudden conditions.

you knew that this was an all-too purposeful set up conducted by the mastermind, chaewon, herself, but you had to at least pretend not to know that in front of wooyoung.

"i don't mind, if you don't," he stated, looking at you for the ultimate reassurance before accepting the tickets that chae was still waving in front of the two of you.

"i don't mind," you finally smiled in confirmation, looking back to quickly and silently shoot daggers at your devious friend.

she, of course, pretended not to notice.

wooyoung took the tickets from your friend's hand before suggesting the two of you get your refreshments for the movie. chaewon made sure to flash you an exaggerated wink, sending two thumbs up while you and wooyoung walked away.

you made a mental note to smack her later.

"i can get the drinks if you get the popcorn," you offered, your hand reaching into your purse for your money.

"hey, don't worry about it! it's my treat," wooyoung was quick to stop you, pulling out his own card to hand over before you could even get the chance to look for your own. "you can get the next time, yeah?"

... next time?

you felt your cheeks warm slightly, a little shy at the insinuation that wooyoung already wanted to see you again. he was nice, yes, and definitely cute, but you didn't feel that the few minutes you've known each other was enough to already plan a second outing together.

you did with soobin..

you shook your head to quickly get the thought of him out of your mind, not wanting to think about him.

at least, not now.

"so what do you do?" you suddenly heard wooyoung ask, looking up to see him handing over an empty theater cup to you while he grabbed the large bucket of popcorn.

"oh, i'm currently interning at c company," you told him, walking together to the beverage fountains to get your drinks. "i'm trying to save up money to attend uni next year to complete my degree."

wooyoung then went on to ask you about your major and what you wanted to pursue afterwards. from there, he asked about any hobbies you were into. after a brief mention of music, he then began questioning about your favorite songs and artists.

you couldn't help but to smile while you spoke with him, genuinely flattered at how sincerely interested he was in learning about you.

unfortunately, you couldn't help but to feel a twinge in your heart, unable to help yourself from thinking back to the first boy who made you feel this way.

for not wanting to think about a certain someone, he sure knew how to keep popping into your head any chance he got.

trying to ignore all the thoughts swirling in the back of your head, you and wooyoung eventually found your way to the back of the theater, fully prepared to settle and watch the film together.

"don't forget to silence your phone," wooyoung whispered to you playfully, not wanting to speak too loudly over the previews so as not to disturb anyone around you guys.

"oh, don't worry about that. i forgot my phone at home," you pouted, watching as he pulled his own out to silence it.

you never realized how reliant on the device you truly were until you had to go an entire evening without it. not to mention it was also driving you mad that you couldn't figure out if soobin had eventually messaged you at all.

what if he tried to make plans after all and you weren't there?

suddenly, wooyoung chuckled and had slyly slipped his phone into your hands, causing you to look up at him pretty confused.

"here, then you should put your number in so i can call you later to make sure you got it back."

you were blushing profusely, yet you were still slightly hesitant. meeting his eyes momentarily, you eventually typed your number into his contacts - you figured it couldn't hurt to do so.

it wasn't that you didn't want to talk to him, he truly seemed like a great guy, but you couldn't help but hear that voice in your head yelling at you that it was wrong. everything about tonight just felt completely wrong.

you had to fight to push your thoughts aside, choosing to exchange smiles with wooyoung briefly before sitting back to focus entirely on the movie. you did not want to distress yourself thinking about anything or anyone else.

although, you realized at some point that if someone were to ask you what the movie was about, you would have absolutely no idea what to tell them. truth be told, you couldn't pay attention to a single minute.

all you could do was think about the boy beside you ... and the boy you wished was beside you instead.

as the two of you sat in the darkened room, you couldn't help but compare. you didn't feel the butterflies the way you had with soobin. you didn't feel the tension the way you had with soobin. you felt no electricity between the two of you .. the way you did with soobin.

you glanced down at wooyoung's arm taking up half the arm rest. there was no pull. you didn't want to hold his hand the way you had desperately wished soobin would hold yours.

you hit the back of your head onto the chair, having to refrain from groaning in sadness to draw any attention to you.

why did you want soobin so bad??

if today taught you anything, it was that soobin did not hold the same feelings for you the way you felt for him. in fact, you learned that soobin wanted absolutely nothing to do with you anymore.

you glanced back down to wooyoung's hand.

trying to completely distract your wandering mind, you casually placed your arm beside his. it took about 5 seconds total before wooyoung's fingers began to mindlessly play with yours, and perhaps about another few seconds before your hands were intertwined together.

it didn't feel the same. not even remotely close.

you missed soobin.

after the movie was over, you and wooyoung were walking down the theater stairs together discussing the movie - your comments remaining as vague as possible, considering you didn't pay attention to a single moment past the title screen.

you mainly smiled in amusement, listening intently as he explained to you which scenes were his favorite and what he thought of the ending. when he asked for your opinion, you merely just agreed with him so as not to have to go into specific details.

since your eyes were trained on the boy beside you, you only barely caught yourself as you ran into someone else exiting one of the theater pews.

"oh, shit, i'm so sorry," you quickly apologized, stumbling slightly and bumping into the complete stranger.

"you're fine, no worries," the stranger, a boy with a very attractive wolfcut, told you. "are you good?"

you opened your mouth to answer, but was cut off by wooyoung grabbing your attention. "y/n, come on, we're falling behind."

you smiled at the stranger and his friends, apologizing once more, before following behind your date, accepting the hand that he was reaching out for you. it still didn't strike the same sparks as it had with soobin, but you at least felt some sort of comfort from it nonetheless.

the two of you met up with the rest of your group outside the theater room - unable to help yourself from noticing chaewon's proud, mischievous smirk once she spotted your hands together.

"so we were all just talking about grabbing dinner together. are you guys in?"

wooyoung looked over at you, raising his eyebrows expectantly as he waited for you to answer first.

if you were being entirely honest, you just wanted to go home. you wanted to be in bed. you wanted to pathetically wait by your phone for the boy you really wanted to be with to message you.

"yeah, i'm in!"

you surprised yourself with your own answer, but, thinking about it, you remembered that chaewon was the one with the apartment key anyway, and she most definitely wasn't going to hand them over.

"great, then i guess we're all going," wooyoung smiled adorably, his hand squeezing yours gently.

yeah.. great.

after collectively agreeing on a barbecue place not too far from the theater, chaewon then suggested that everyone should split cabs on the way there. her reasoning being so that all of you didn't have to crowd a bus and risk annoying any of the other passengers.

to no one's surprise - or, rather, not to your own surprise - it was you and wooyoung that conveniently happened to be left out and paired to ride together.

"you sure you're up for going?"

you looked over at wooyoung in surprise, seeing him look at you with genuine concern. you were starting to realize that you probably weren't being as subtle as you hoped.

that's when you started to feel guilty.

you were acting so hung up on a guy that didn't feel the same way about you that you were ruining a wonderful evening with a great guy right in front of you.

"of course i am, i'm sorry," you apologized.

"i can take you home, if that's where you'd rather be?" wooyoung told you, opening the door to the cab that had just arrived for you both.

the rest of the group all took the first couple ones to the restaurant, which left you and wooyoung to wait a bit longer in order for another one to arrive. chaewon was not kidding when she said she had a diabolical plan to get you two alone for most of the night.

to be quite honest, you were truly impressed by how she could pull all of this off.

"i'm starving, actually," you tried to joke, wanting to lighten the mood and not personally sabotage the rest of the evening. "you can take me home after."

wooyoung's little smile grew even wider at your words, watching you as you entered the cab first and shortly following behind you. he gave the driver the address to the restaurant before looking back over at you with his bright smile.

if nothing else, you could agree that wooyoung was really sweet. he was kind to you the whole night, and he put so much effort into getting to know you. you felt horrible for having even compared him to soobin when he didn't deserve that.

the least you could do was continue the night with him and genuinely see where things ended up. whether the two of you ended up just as friends or maybe something more.

you couldn't possibly know until you gave him a chance.

a real chance.

・❥・

"it's all part of the game! this just means-"

"screw your fucking game, yeonjun! your stupid plan made her stop talking to me!"

back at the dorm, soobin had been yelling at yeonjun for ruining his life for the past half hour. that wasn't without punching him for the first 15 minutes the second he arrived.

yeonjun had been casually lounging on the couch, not at all prepared to be attacked so suddenly.

"well, if she hadn't left work early, i promise things would've turned out differently," yeonjun tried to speak in his defense.

the two of them were arguing back and forth continuously - yeonjun trying to explain how everything was still 'going to plan' and soobin calling him all the curse words in the book for ruining everything he had built with you up until that point.

up until this morning, soobin had fully believed that his relationship with you was actually going somewhere great. he thought maybe there was a chance that the feelings he felt for you could possibly be reciprocated.

but what if he was wrong? what if he was reading the signs from you completely wrong?

then, to make it worse, he stupidly followed yeonjun's terrible advice to ruin, not only a potential chance of something more, but your entire friendship as well.

"now she won't even answer me," soobin sighed, throwing himself onto the couch in despair. "one day of following your advice, and now she won't even talk to me."

yeonjun had begun to say something, but quickly shut his mouth whenever soobin suddenly shot up and answered his phone after a single ring erupted throughout the room.

"hello?!"

yeonjun rolled his eyes, wanting to gag at how obviously desperate his friend was.

"hey, soobin, quick question. what was your girlfriend's name again?"

soobin felt his entire body drop, never hating the sound of beomgyu's voice more than in that moment. he would've hung up on him then and there if he wasn't intrigued by the random question.

"she's not my girlfriend," soobin shot a murderous glare back over to yeonjun before continuing. "and her name is y/n. why?"

"see, that's what taehyun said, but it's funny because i thought it was-"

"just get to your point," soobin groaned, already wanting the pointless conversation to end.

there was a brief muffled sound before it was suddenly taehyun's voice that came through from the other end. "we ran into y/n."

soobin's heart began to race. his eyes were widened and he suddenly didn't know what to do with his hands, legs, or the rest of his body. "did you talk to her? did she say something? did she ask about me?"

"why would she ask us about you? she doesn't even know who we are."

he felt pathetic for the realization. taehyun was right. why the hell would she ask random boys she didn't know about someone she didn't even know they were friends with?

pull it together, choi soobin. seriously.

"well, what happened? why are you telling me this?"

a brief muffling sound later, and suddenly it was kai's voice on the other end of the phone. "we think ... she may be on a date right now."

soobin didn't quite know how to describe the feeling he felt just then. it was physically painful, for sure. he couldn't even feel his heart anymore, as it practically stopped. he was also pretty sure he was about to, quite literally, throw up. and had he not known any better, it felt like all of time stopped entirely.

he was drawn back to reality a minute later.

"i'm not proud of it, but beomgyu suggested we follow them. so now we look like complete freaks just for you. i hope you're happy."

and he truly was. suddenly he didn't hate his friends as much as before.

except yeonjun. this was his fault in the first place.

"send me the address, i'm on my way."

soobin immediately ended the call and began to grab his coat from where he had left it on the couch. had it not been for yeonjun physically stopping him, he guaranteed he would've been out that front door in seconds.

"woah woah, wait a minute! you're not actually going to her date, are you?" yeonjun questioned him, feeling every possible confused emotion there was. his lovesick friend could not be serious??

"yes, that's exactly what i'm doing. now let go." soobin had to practically pry yeonjun's hands off his coat before being able to put it on properly.

as he began to rush to put on his shoes, he finally stopped whenever he noticed yeonjun doing the same. "what are you doing?"

"i'm coming with you, what do you think?" yeonjun looked genuinely surprised at his question - as if what he was doing should've been the most obvious thing in the world.

if soobin had to have one say on who should and shouldn't go with him, he was more than definitely sure that yeonjun would be the absolute last person on this earth that he'd allow to go with him.

on top of that, he did not want your first time meeting his friends to be in a situation where three of them were stalking you and the other was the actual person you were messaging today.

"why would you want to come with me?" soobin found himself asking.

"oh, so the other three idiots can be there, but i can't?" yeonjun scoffed, crossing his arms and pouting.

"yeonjun, i'm sorry, but-."

"look," yeonjun stopped him. "if you're going over there just to embarrass yourself, then, one, i need to be there for you when you need me. and two, i also want to watch."

soobin rolled his eyes at yeonjun's last reason - almost having been fooled by the first half.

not even bothering to say anything else, knowing it would be pointless, he finally got to rush out the door to wherever you were.

it was true that he absolutely had no idea what he was going to do or say, but all he knew was that he needed to see you.

previous | masterlist | next

a/n:

OKAY SO much sooner update than normal, but it's a little day-after-valentine's gift! i hope you guys continue to enjoy my series <3 it means so much to me to read all of your love and support !!

also i kept fighting with who i wanted chaewon's friend to be, and i just want you all to know that a wheel roulette chose wooyoung for me.

personally am not too proud of this one... i don't think it's all that great, but i needed to get this out in order to work on what i really want to happen next.

(btw, a small secret: fluff is coming soon, i promise)

~

taglist:

@sha-aesthic @wccycc @yjusei @ihrtgyu @strawberrydaichi @seodami @sparkswhoz @o934pm @dongmeiii @cannedturtle @intrrverted @fanfangying1304 @n0tprettybutt1red @human-misery

[ bold = couldn't be tagged :( ]

[bluedalahorse]

I’m kinda curious about this tbh, for the ask game: 14

Ok comrades, it’s blasphemy time.

(I say this with levity. Growing up as a lefty Episcopalian, I learned that engaging in a little blasphemy from time to time was a healthy way of practicing one’s religion. Likewise I find that part of my supporting Wilmon and loving YR also involves me investigating Wilmon alternatives every once in a while. I think it helps me consider what Wilhelm and Simon mean to one another uniquely, and not just generally. So consider this deconstruction an act of love for the show’s main ship.)

Sigust

In my opinion, Sigust has a lot of untapped potential, mainly in the realm of crackfics and AUs. There’s just too much they have in common (dad baggage and ambition, especially, but also curly hair) for me to not be interested in an enemies to lovers dynamic there. AUs might be the best place to explore them in a serious way, since I think I’d have reservations shipping them in a world where August still does the video. @sillyunicorn does delightful things with Simon and August! You should all compliment her.

Siyub

On the softer side, Simon/Ayub could be a darling Friends To Lovers pairing with a lot of possibility. It’s not the kind of thing I’m good at writing (I’m not a big friends to lovers person, really, but I did once write it by accident in my original writing) and I’d be fascinated to see someone else attempt it. I think it’d be an ideal pairing for the people who came away from S3 deeply concerned about Wilhelm as a future partner for Simon, and thinking Simon deserves better.

Consider this: Right before they’re about to start high school, Ayub develops a chill little crush on Simon. He’s quiet about it at first, wanting to understand his own feelings before saying anything. He’s close to saying something, just to clear the air. But then Simon’s going to transfer to this fancy boarding school, and starts talking about his plans to leave Bjärstad, and Ayub decides to keep quiet about his feelings because this side of Simon is a little unfamiliar and strange to him, and he wants to protect himself.

Meanwhile, Simon goes through the plot of YR, but stays broken up from Wilhelm at the end of the series. And then he moves away to Göteborg. Ayub thinks his feelings have faded at this point, and he and Simon are back to friendship. They’re keeping in contact with one another on weekly video game headset dates. But then they start to open up about new developments in their lives… and confide in one another… and ok they fall in love. Over the headset. Or in some other way.

Alternately, all of that but they end up in a QPR at the end of the story. I’m okay with either!

I want to go to bat for Siyub because I feel like Ayub rarely gets shipped romantically and/or sexually with other characters on the show. It’s possible it happens more than I think—I don’t read much wilmon-centric fic so it’s possible it’s happening in subplots than I know about. But he is genuinely one of the sweetest dudes on the show, on a show where most of the boys are mean, and he should get more dates. He should. SIGN MY PETITION.

That reminds me, I gotta try writing an Ayub/Felice one-shot at some point. Speaking of…

Willice

This one intrigues me, actually.

Every once in a while I see people put forward the idea that Wilhelm and Felice getting together and staying together would have been something Hillerska was cool and chill with, especially since it’s a more “hetero-presenting” pairing. I don’t know if I’d 100% buy that. The rumors about their kiss seem to benefit Wilhelm more than Felice at first—the guys cheer Wilhelm on for “hooking up” with her, while the girls gossip about Felice behind her back. In addition, it’s also an interracial relationship, and we know from Meghan Markle’s IRL experiences that European royal families kinda suck on that front. I can see Kristina and the royal court liking the idea of Felice of a high school girlfriend, but not wanting him to settle down with Felice long-term. There’d be a lot of interesting conflict to work with there that’s just as engaging as the conflict Wilmon faces in the show.

Something else I think about a lot with Wilhelm and Felice is the pressure they both feel to perform Traditionally Gendered Interactions. In a universe where Wilhelm and Felice fall in love with one another, what if… they discover their relationship is more sexually gratifying when they break away from those Traditionally Gendered Interactions? What if secret kink is involved in that? How does that contrast with the prince and princess image they’re projecting to the world? (In short LET FELICE DOM WILHELM. Or something.)

I don’t know if I see Willice happening in a fully canon compliant universe. But it makes an interesting little AU or experiment.

Fic Option A: Somewhere in the Large Hadron Collider, Wilhelm from Earth 1, who is in love with Simon, meets Wilhelm from Earth 2, who is in love with Felice. They have a conversation or switch places or something and plot ensues.

Fic Option B: Simon/Wilhelm/Felice as a poly triad. @heliza24 asked about favorite polyships in another of the asks I got, so to be continued.

Nille

I mean sure, why not. I don’t see it lasting but it could be an interesting exploration of both characters’ relationships to the closet.

Willexander or Alemon

Shipping either of the boys with Alexander leads to some juicy canon divergences.

Consider a world where Simon leaves Hillerska after his first term and stays broken up with Wilhelm.

Second term, Alexander comes back because his dad donated money. He’s super friendly to Wilhelm because he’s sure it’s August who threw him under the bus. They start to hang out, and then fall for one another… but oh no, will Wilhelm be able to reveal the truth of what he did?

Alternately, Alexander stays expelled, Simon stays away from Hillerska, and they meet up later as adults. Simon and Alexander end up confronting the fact that Alexander was sold out to protect Simon. I’m not entirely sure what the mood is here but you can take this a thousand places.

…

Okay that’s all for now! Thank you for letting me go down this strange and heretical road.

For those who wanna keep playing along, the asks are here. I’ve already answered 3, 5, 6, 7, 12, 14, 15, 16, 17, 20. Currently working on 4, 5, 6, 8, 10, 11, and 18.

Or you can send asks to other folks playing! I can’t wait to see others’ answers.

[thelaughtercafe]

Muted Memories Chapter 2

Tea Type: Milk Tea

Potential Triggers:  Verbal and physical abuse, dissociating as a trauma response, nondescriptive murder, descriptive threats(not at reader).

Pairing: Issac Foster/F! Reader

Length: 4k+

Summary: Library explorations, and meeting new characters, fun for the whole family!

A/N: Chapter 2 is here!! Excited I finally got this done!! I’m not fully happy with the way it turned out but after messing with a few other ideas, I decided to go with the one I wrote while genuinely triggered since it felt the most raw and real.

I’m okay now; emotional flashbacks just really suck. Do not recommend lmao. Hope everyone enjoys and please do leave feedback! Always excited to hear from my readers on what they think!! ❤️

The rest of the day was easy once Zack dragged you back. Ray had thanked him in a reverent tone, to which the bandaged boy had only ruffled her hair fondly. They really were close. You hadn’t been expecting him to do the same to you however and it showed as you ducked your head to hide your burning face in Ray’s shoulder a moment. She giggled at your embarrassment and pet your hair. 

You all sat down and ate after that. Ray was attached to your side the rest of the morning, constantly either hanging off you, holding your hand or hugging you. She seemed touched starved, though given you were as well you easily obliged and accommodated her. You had to go to the library after breakfast since you no longer had a laptop and Zack had declined your offer to come, saying he had “better shit to do”. 

You shrugged him off but again reminded him to take anything he needed and disguised Rachel in one of your big hoodies before heading out. When talking about how well they were known they said their popularity had been dying down and they’d come here since it was so out of the way, hoping to find a forever home.

The air was a little chilly so you were glad you’d bundled up Rachel, however you were left shivering a little, given your other hoodie was still being repaired. You’d torn a noticeable hole in it on a rushed run out one day and the mender was blind; a friend Mr. Takamata had met and grown close to, and you had as well in turn. You wouldn’t give your business to anyone else despite the longer wait times. His job was always impeccable. Maybe you could get it on the way back, if he was still open. 

“Alright, to the library! We’ll go grocery shopping tonight on the way home and I’ll make dinner.”

“We’re gonna spend the whole day there?”

Rachel sounded excited at the prospect and you hummed in agreement. 

“Yeah, as long as you don’t mind. I need to do some school work and print out an essay. After that I figured I could show you some of my favorite books and maybe bring some home for Zack too.“

"That sounds fun but…mm…" 

Ray sounded happy at the prospect but trailed off and seemed conflicted, looking at the ground as she walked. 

"What’s wrong?”

“Oh I suppose it’s okay if I tell you. Zack can’t read.”

You blinked at that. He was around your age wasn’t he? You supposed you shouldn’t have been surprised. He clearly had a lot of inner trauma in addition to the physical. 

You smiled down at Ray though, swinging your held hands cheerfully. 

“I’ll get him some anyway. He doesn’t have to learn if he doesn’t want to of course, but I’d be more than happy to teach him. Even if he doesn’t, I like to read aloud anyway so he can enjoy it that way if he’d like.”

Ray gave a contemplative hum. 

“I don’t understand why you’re so nice to us. After everything we’ve done-”

You heard her voice crack and quickly stopped walking, gently pulling her aside and crouching down to her level to allow the other people milling about to pass. 

“Hey, hey! You keep sayin’ that, but from what I’ve seen you two are both damaged, but have been kind to me. It’s like I told Zack last night too…I’m lonely, sad as that may sound. So…no more apologies, okay? I’m happy to give you both a place to stay and let you have a fresh start. Mr. Takamata gave one to me…it seems only right that I should do the same.”

Ray threw her arms around you and you hugged her back before moving to stand. 

"Now, how about that library trip?”

She beamed up at you.  

“Let’s go!”

—–

You couldn’t help but sigh in relief as you both entered the library. It was cold, now. The wind had really picked up and you were already dreading the 20-minute walk back home when it’d be colder tonight.

Maybe you ought to stop by Reginald’s place on the way back after all. Now that you were here though, you had to put your game face on. You had two essays and one story to work on. Your only fun elective this semester was Monsters in Literature. Best teacher too; he reminded you of Robin Williams in his enthusiasm and inspiring words. You had a vague outline of ideas for the story and you wrote often, but creating original content was much harder than the fanworks you were used to. 

The essays were honestly easier. Everyone was always surprised when you told them that, but essay’s were really just cramming as many words as possible to get a simple point across most of the time, and given you enjoyed writing, even if it was boring as sin it was at least easy to bullshit. 

You observed Ray as you put your bookbag down, wanting to get her set up before starting. 

“You’re around 14 right?”

She nodded. 

“15, now actually. As of a few weeks ago.”

“Oh! We’ll have to celebrate. I’ll pick up some overtime, make sure to remind me to get a cake this weekend okay? Just in case my memory goes kaput after all this school work.”

She giggled and nodded happily as you mimed passing out. 

“Do you know what kind of books you like hun? I can get you set up in the right section and then get started here.”

She gave a carefree shrug. 

“I didn’t read much. Too noisy before.” 

Seeing the way her eyes went dull again you got to your feet and held your hand out to her before she could go too deep into her memories.

She took it and you led her into the adjoining room for Young Adult Fiction, not acknowledging the fact that she trembling with anything more than a soothing thumb rub. 

“Here’s the YA section. All kinds of scenarios and characters here- I recommend reading the back or inside of the flap and then just picking whichever one sounds interesting! You can always just go based on the cover if you’d like a more randomized experience though. This is still my favorite section honestly; if you need any help with the words or have any questions don’t be afraid to ask me. Feel free to get comfy, and if anyone that’s not me comes up to you, come get me or yell my name if you get scared, I’ll be just in the other room.”

After making sure she was okay you left her, happy to see she was already hesitantly beginning to explore. 

You sighed in resignation, sitting down and cracking your neck.

No more distractions, time to get your work done!

—–

The day passed quickly, with Ray occasionally coming over to ask for help with a word she didn’t know but it was a rarity and she was already on the 2nd book in a supernatural fantasy series when you were finished. You playfully took it from her to check the title. 

“Ooh Maximum Ride hm? That’s a good one, haven’t read it in ages. One of my favorites at your age too. Let’s bring it home with us huh?”

She nodded eagerly, a big grin on her face as she made grabby hands for the book, and you obliged, quickly grabbing the 3rd and 4th one as well. After a moment’s hesitation you grabbed 2 more for good measure, one for you, and one for Zack. You know how you were as a child and better safe than leave the poor girl on a cliffhanger. Luckily the librarians and you were already well acquainted given you came to volunteer to read to the kids here when you weren’t in school. It was a quick affair to check the books out and you were on your way. 

The essays had given you no trouble and were already sent to your professors…but that damn story had you completely stuck. You knew the general concept you wanted was dealing with possession of some sort but you couldn’t figure out who should be doing the possessing. It was the idea of being out of control you wanted to tap into Such a primal fear so underexplored by most monsters. 

It was still freezing oh God- you shivered as you and Ray made your way home. She looked at you worriedly and you could tell she was going to offer you the jacket but you patted her head. 

“I’ll be okay- gonna s-stop and get my m-m-mended one before groceries after all.” 

You sped walked and reached Reginald’s in record time, who luckily was just about to close up. 

“Reggie, please tell me you have my coat finished?”

Your eyes and voice were pleading and when he reached out to touch your arm in greeting he recoiled, frowning in fatherly disapproval. 

“Young lady, what on Earth are you doing out here in this cold without any protection?”

He sighed heavily and easily made his way back inside, holding the door open for you and Ray. 

It was the same as always, not a speck of dust in sight, but homey and most importantly, warm. You held your hands to your lips and warmed them. You could’ve cried when after a few moments Reginald came out, coat in hand. 

“Oh thank you so much! I’m in your debt! Here-” 

You went to pull out your wallet but at the sound of rustling Reggie tsk’d and shook his head. 

“No need, sweetheart. Can’t let ole’ Takamata’s daughter freeze now can I? How’s about you introduce me to your little friend here and I’ll call it even.”

You smiled fondly and sighed in defeat, slipping your dark burgundy coat over your t-shirt and zipping it up.  

“Fair deal! This is Ray, her and her older brother Zack will be staying with me from now on. They broke in and I couldn’t just turn away hungry people, especially a young girl like her. You know how Mr. Takamata was, he’d roll over in his grave if I didn’t help!”

The lies merged with the truth and Reginald laughed heartily, while Ray looked at you in disbelief. She surely expected you to give them fake names or backstories but there was no need. To lie effectively, you just had to be confident and believe what you were saying. 

“True enough!! Well, nice to meet you little lady, call me Reggie hm? Here, this hoodie feels too thin-”

“Reggie!”

He ignored your exasperated voice and before you knew it he’d tossed a small lilac coat and large black one your way and was shooing you out despite you protests. 

“I’ll hear nothing of it! Consider it a welcoming gift! Now get!” 

“Thank you Reggie. Really.”

He waved you off and patted Ray’s head before walking off. You smirked fondly and turned to look down at Ray. 

“Welp. How’s about we just get something hot and head on home? Zack may get worried if we’re out too much longer.” 

Ray nodded cheerfully. 

“Sounds great to me! I’m starved! That man was really nice, I hope we see him again soon.”

You giggled at her enthusiasm, opting to get pizza at the place right down the hill so it wouldn’t be a long walk. 

“Me too. I’m sure you’ll like him even more as you get to know him. He’s very kind. He has a service dog named Bucky, I’m sure you’ll get to meet them both again soon.” 

You held the pizza and Zack’s new coat, while Ray got the soda, garlic knots and the pepperoni pinwheel you caught her drooling over in the display case. 

You walked through the door with her on your heels, grinning and calling for Zack as you entered. 

“Zack we’re ho-”

Your voice died out at the sight in front of you. You couldn’t breathe. 

Why was he…here?

“Chris?”

That cursed name escaped your lips, bile burned your throat as he smiled and took a step closer. You went to back up, the door still open and remembered Ray and the fact your hands were full. 

Where was Zack? Didn’t matter you had to get Ray to safety. But she was already entering behind you, and setting the food on the table like he wasn’t there. She came over to take the pizza but you were in shock.

“The one and only!” 

His smile twitched, but you knew behind the mask he was seething as Ray began pulling out the food and setting the table. 

“Pizza night hm? Funny. I haven’t gotten my pay this month yet, I trust you have that ready for me?”

You just stared at him in stricken fear. The door was closed but you still felt just as frozen.

“…What are you doing here? How did you find this place?”

“Oh here? I’ve known for years, pet.I just…”

His smirk turned to a sneer. 

“Loosened your leash a little. Now, if you won’t give me what I want, you’re surely not fit to raise a child here. Maybe I’ll take her home…give her a proper enviorment. I mean, she didn’t even greet me properly. You know what happens to impolite children, don’t you?”

You didn’t speak up but you moved your body to block the way to the kitchen, motioning for Ray to run with your free hand, but she was completely oblivious. Your eyes steeled a little, but your voice was still that of a terrified kid. It didn’t matter that you were older now, it didn’t matter that you thought you were getting better. 

Suddenly you were a frightened child all over again. 

“I won’t let you have her.” 

You flinched at the feeling of a hand on you and looked down to find her gripping your hand, tugging you lightly towards the table.  

“Dinner’s ready. Come eat.”

Her eyes had gone dead, and she was pointedly ignoring Chris. She seemed very dissociated; probably a trauma response from her own family, if you had to guess. You realized your other hand still held the black coat and tossed it on the couch before reluctantly letting her take you to the table where you sat down. She sat too, and began eating while you looked numbly down at your plate. 

You heard the chair slide back as he sat at the head of the table, beginning to dissociate a little yourself but maintaining your hypervigilance. You felt shaky and scared, aware of every move he and yourself made. He began to eat, completely unbothered. 

You’d finally felt safe, away from him. Thought he was oblivious and finally mostly out of your life, save the monthly payments. You should have known you could never beat him. That he couldn’t cope with the loss of control. 

Now one of the first people in your life you allowed yourself to care for was at risk. It was your fault for not safeguarding against this possibility and the only reason you weren’t spiraling was because you knew you had to keep Ray safe. 

“What do you want?”

Your voice shook, but it was low and even, in hopes of being non-threatening. 

He was nonchalant as ever.

“You’re going to protect me, and let me stay here. I’m only hiding here because some psychopath showed up at my place.”

Your breath hitched and you looked up in fear as Ray jumped to her feet.

“Zack!?”

You hopped up quickly and wrapped Ray in your arms to shield her, and quickly mustered a lie. 

“Shh…shh…Zack isn’t here sweetheart.”

“That’s the second time I’ve heard that name. Who is he? Is he staying here too?”

“He’s her older brother. When she gets scared she seeks him out- I’m not the only one who got traumatized.”

Your mutter was bitter and under your breath but he caught it. 

He always heard it. He stood and you held Ray tighter. You just had to last until Zack got here. Keep him placated. You trembled- God why did the shakes never stop around him?

“Talking back? Pathetic. You’re shaking like a damn leaf. Whatever. You’ll always be a freak.”

You swayed as the familiar insult caused an emotional and partially visual flashback, hearing faint words, catching glimpses from the back of your mom’s car. She was inside getting groceries. 

“You’re such a damn freak- those bullies at school were right about you. You’re really nothing but a freak. Everything you do is freaky-”

He’d used variations of the word till you were hyperventilating upon your mother’s return. You couldn’t hide it fast enough, but his mask was right back on. Told your mother he was “getting you used to the word.” Ha. She’d harmlessly shared the bullying you’d confided in her about, having no idea you intentionally hadn’t told him because she didn’t know any better. 

But your Mother isn’t here now. 

Your shaking stopped and you took a deep breath, steeling your own mask. You straightened from hugging Ray and glared at where he stood by the chair he claimed. 

“I don’t care what you do with me, but you won’t hurt her. I’ll never let you abuse anyone else I care about again.”

He threw his head back in bitter, sadistic laughter and you acted quickly, grabbing her jacket in one smooth motion and rushing to shove Ray outside, with a simple command before slamming the side door shut and locking it, tossing the key out there with her so she nor Chris could get her back inside. 

“Find Zack and stay hidden if you can’t!”

She hesitated, meeting your eyes and you smiled at her, trying to make her feel secure only to yelp as something slammed hard on the back of your head, sending you to the floor. You vaguely registered the picture and glass surrounding you, and the sound of Ray crying out your name in panic. The picture of you and Mr. Takamata lay near your face and you smiled weakly.. 

“…Sorry, Dad. Looks like I won’t be able to fulfill my promise after all.”

Your head felt wet and warm, and your vision was getting murky. You felt dizzy, trying to stay conscious. Chris was yelling, but for once…you felt serene. No fear. No constant hypervigilance. No more masks. But…Zack. Where was he? You never got to give him his new coat…

Darkness took you under. 

—–

Zack burst into the door with a loud bang, wild eyes scanning the area. He’d been searching frantically for the bastard all day and was exhausted and starving after a long day. He’d been planning to pick up the following day when he arrived, only to hear an unfamiliar male screaming curses. 

Zack didn’t consider himself a protective person. He’d grown up most of his life alone and fending for himself. Ray was an exception to the rule, and he thought he’d never find someone he wanted to protect again. Till he met you. He didn’t know you well. Didn’t even fully trust you yet, honestly, always wary to give trust. But he saw something of himself in you. Plus, you were horrendously naive and so, so in need of protection. 

This bastard seemed the best place to start. 

To see him in his new home, where he finally felt safe? Zack was anything but happy. The man froze after kicking you on the floor. Zack spotted Ray with tears swimming in her eyes as she screamed behind the back door, before rushing to meet up with him, heading around to the front once she saw him. 

Things moved quickly after that. 

Zack had the man by the throat, sadistic snickers leaving him ceaselessly as he held him against the nearby wall because if he didn’t laugh and scream he was going to do something else and he vowed to never do that again. 

“You’ve got 3 seconds. Talk.”

The man, if he could be called that, was near pissing himself in fear but Zack felt none of the typical satisfaction. Just rage, simmering under the surface along with his want to rip the slight smirk he saw tugging at the asshole face whenever he glanced at your crumpled body. 

“I have no problem with you, alright!? I don’t know what you want- if you want to kill her she’s all yours, but I haven’t done anything! I’m an upstanding citizen, I swear!”

“So lemme see if I got this right. You come into my house, trash my place, hurt my family, not only fucking up their heads but physically too and you think I’m gonna let you walk outta here?”

Zack threw his head back in magical laughter at the thought; it was the funniest damn joke he’d ever heard. At that, Chris finally snapped and threw a punch, facade dropping in an instant, but Zack held fast, vaguely noticing Ray walking up next to him a look in her eye he hadn’t seen since they were trapped. 

“God you’re a freak just like her- no, you’re some kinda monster! Guh-!”

Ray stabbed hard into his stomach, making the man gurgle on his words. He looked down in shocked horror and Ray was impassive. 

“You hurt her, so I hurt you.”

He cursed at her too. 

“You little bitch!! You’ll never get away with this, I’ll make you pay!”

Ray shook her head in disappointment.

“There’s no fixing you.”

She waved before turning her attention to you.  

“Bye bye.”

Chris opened his mouth to snarl at her again but Zack was done playing games. He had more important things to do. He glared, shaking the man before beginning to drag him outside and into the forest, talking casually.

“Pretty sure we got unfinished business buddy. See I’ve got a sharp knife, and I’m curious how many pieces I can cut off before you bleed out. Shall we find out together?”

“No, no God please!! Have mercy!”

“Shut the Hell up!”

His shout was one of anger as he tossed the man down and kicked him hard in the ribs, paying no mind as he screamed in pain. 

“That’s what I caught you doing to the woman who let us stay here! I don’t know why she’s afraid of you, but after tonight she’ll never have to fear you again. Nothing should scare her more than me. I won’t let you have her. I refuse. Her fear belongs to me. Now do the whole damn world a favor and DIE!”

His last word was a guttural roar of anger and when the man was finally dead by his hand, Zack crumpled. He didn’t know why, or how. His body was shaking and his bandaged were wet and it wouldn’t stop. He didn’t like it at all. This feeling, the way His mouth made sounds out of his control. It felt like…he’d killed his demon a second time, but this time it wasn’t just his. It was yours too. He found…he liked the feeling. More than his usual kills. This was more…liberating. He took the time to let whatever was happening run its course as he dragged the now dead piece of meat into the forest and buried him with the very shovel you used to do as he had, but for someone you loved rather than loathed. Love. Still such a foreign word and concept to him. He shook off his thoughts 

But now he needed to make sure you stayed alive long enough to hear him gloat. He could worry about the oddness of “feelings” later. Ugh. He shuddered. Feelings. Gross. 

He bit down a smile as he made his way back towards the house, seeing from the window that Ray was already patching you up, one of your textbooks open next to her. 

Maybe whatever he felt for you and Ray though, wasn’t quite so bad. 

[rosetheocto]

Hey! If you'd be open to it, I was interested in hearing your thoughts on any Failtopia pairings that you particularly enjoy and the reasons you do? Whether they be platonic or romantic-

YESSSS I HAVE AN EXCUSE TO YAP ABOUT CHARACTER INTERACTIONS YWUAJSJEJJEJR!!! OKAY!! So idk how put together this is since there is a mix of my typing when I’m super tired + typing when I just woke up so I’m praying that what I’m saying makes sense LMAO. TLDR: I really like failtopia’s characters

So starting off with what is probably the most popular dynamic in this series: Bo and Erica!! To say they’ve both Gone Through It is an understatement, and them both finding comfort and safety in each other is amazing to me!! Like. Erica’s had so many people die on her and the reaction to finding out that was nearly impossible to lose Bo was just. Flawless. Can’t believe Dan improvised that. And Bo was sent to just kill Mar and work for Screamith but Erica was pretty much the start to her letting her true self shine and developing an actual attachment to The Incident!! It’s so awesome how Dan has wrote them. we love our gay level 6 “friendship” girlbosses ‼️‼️

Mar and Orion have also gone through a handful of things before the series begins, and the relationship they develop as the series progresses is pretty dang interesting! as much as the fandom focus on EriBo as a romantic thing, more people need to talk about how Mar has explicitly shown he has a crush on Orion. MULTIPLE TIMES. The idea of Orion opening up to Mar after he lost his wife and Mar opening up to Orion after his time as the Dark Curse and AGGHH I love these two so much and the way they interact every time they’re on screen is amazing. old man yaoi

I imagine C!Failboat and Erica as exes. like they dated for like a week and were both mutually like “that was awful let’s just stay friends”, They had a bunch of small interactions together (especially in S1) and I like them being friendly towards each other, Erica finding a friend in C!Fail was a pretty good step for her arc! I also think the idea of C!Fail and Erica being childhood friends in non-Miitopia AUs very intriguing!! Any content of those two interacting (that isn’t romantic) is always a nice thing to see!

Taking a break from the more popular relationships/friendships in this series, we have Deko and Joker!! For two characters that barely interact in canon there’s a lot you can do with them! They’re just two anime boys trying to survive in this weird party. I have a lot of thoughts on them but I just can’t form it aghahajsjjs but the main one is that they aren’t alone in what they’re going through, and no matter what backstory you use for Joker it still has a lot of potential!! I’m sure people can explain this one better than I can I just really like this rarepair!! while on the topic of Joker, shoutouts to his friendship with Lanc!! You can’t convince me Joker didn’t have a crush on them. Just watch their interactions in Karkaton and you’ll probably get what I mean lmaoo

I just need to mention the sisters!! even if they aren’t sisters by blood, Chi and Erica both have the energy! Chi being the thing that really gets Erica out of her “I hate everything” phase in both seasons needs to be talked about more. They bring out the best in each other I swear,, again I promise I can talk about them more my brain just isn’t giving me the words rn, but I think Gnome explains it best!

While on sibling dynamics, Bill and Shrimp is so great to me. Like. Bill helping Shrimp out not only because he likes her music, but also out of the genuine kindness of his heart is so sweet to me!! They’re so nice every time they’re on screen together and it’s fun to see them battling by each other’s sides!! plus the matching outfits in the finale was also a great touch :]

I’ve mentioned these two before, but Bill and Chi are criminally underrated imo. Like. They’re the only members of the Incident who have just recently turned 18, Chi’s literally Bill’s mentor after he changed jobs, and their dynamic is just so fun to work with!! Bill’s more mature and ‘normal’ while Chi is Chi and will set things on fire For Science and I think scenarios where they’re together are really fun to come up with!! Same with Shrimp and Chi!! The sister dynamic they have is also super underrated, like they’re a Fire and Water duo!! I think there’s a lot of things you can do there :0

look I am more than aware these two have never interacted but that’s cuz Dan is a COWARD and knows that Bo and Lanc being in the same room would lead to so much mayhem lmaoo. Out of everyone in The Incident (apart from Chi obviously) I see Lanc getting along with Bo the best! a lot of stuff I have for them is pretty based on fanon but you can’t tell me they wouldn’t gossip about the lastest drama with the party and the outside world. I swear they’re besties, they relate to each other, just hear me out. I also think Rose and Bo can be great friends and they really have a LOT in common!! Princess who faked their whole identity gang ‼️‼️

I love Erica and Rose just being each other’s biggest hater, it’s my favorite thing ever. it’s canon that Rose only shows off for Erica to prove to her that she’s better than her and that’s amazing to me. They’re both just so done with each other lmaoo (also the headcanon of them each other’s gay awakenings is perfect)

I think Friend and Mar interactions could be cool!! Like for starters they had some pretty huge connections to Hank they could bond over. also I find Mar being canonically a demon mixed with the headcanon of Friend being an angel very fun!! I also think Friend and Erica could be fun to see, especially with Erica’s past as a Cleric!! shared jobs and trauma!!

Mar and literally any FailFleet member can be funny I think, like we already have the Neksdor Three obviously, but I think an ACTUAL Bob and Mar reunion will lead to someone getting beat up lol, everyone in the S1 Squad would all have very different view points on if Mar deserves to be forgiven or not, or if he’s a good leader, etc. and I think that there should be more done with that!!

Orion’s friendship with the rest of The Incident is also a very important part of why the party is the way it is!! There’s absolutely characters with awful relationships to their dads, fathers that are barely around, or just never had a parental figure at all. I LOVE that Orion was able to fill that void for those party members, and he does a damn good job at it too!! And of course the parallels he has with Erica is great, both are stubborn warriors with a lot of baggage, but also have a lot of differences, like their views on stuff like becoming a healer!! Orion being like a mentor to Erica is great. also shoutouts to Slapo, we love her. I think her interacting with other members of The Incident is also something that’s needed more!!

Speaking of fathers, scenes with Chat and C!Fail are downright hilarious! Chat’s insanity mixed with C!Fail’s attitude always leads to some crazy thing going down! Chat with anyone really is always a treat, since they’re way more than too much to handle most of the time, and seeing how everyone reacts to their shenanigans is always gonna be fun!!

Smuk, Rose, and Bob’s relationship is just perfection. Bob obviously crushing on Rose is so great to see when they have scenes together and Smuk basically proposing to Rose (but not really) with that ring is also cool!! And of course we gotta mention Smuk and Bob’s bromance in Greenhorne, those two were inseparable a lot of the time I swear, I love them a lot, I’m praying if we get S3 we have those three come back (along with Petunyawn)

Deko’s friendship with both Chi and Lanc is vital to his arc!! Similar to Erica, he had gone through quite a lot before S1 and traveling with them got him to warm up to them and helped him get better control of his powers!! Lanc and Chi being absolute goofsters while Deko has no energy is VERY amusing!! also Deko, someone who was experimented on, being paired up with two soon-to-be scientists is vile lmaoo, why do you do this Dan /pos

SPEAKING OF THOSE SCIENTISTS!! If you thought I wasn’t gonna bring up Lanchi at all then you’re wrong. These two. These two are my everything. They’re undoubtedly my OTP!! There is quite a handful of canon evidence (in both seasons!) that point to Something going on between them!! I’d list them all out rn, but imma save that for another time, so I’ll just stick to saying everything I like about them!! The way Lanc and Chi just bounce off each other is insane. I swear they can read each other’s minds sometimes, they actually just share a braincell!! Lanc being all nervous in the Finale and Chi comforting them,, and ofc Chi being inspired by Lanc to switch jobs in S2 is just GAHAJJJJW I LOVE THEM!! They’ve been living rent free in my head since 2021 and I can’t get them out even if I tried!! EVERY SINGLE INTERACTION they have can be read as romantic. I refuse to believe they’re just friends lmaoo

[jasper-the-menace]

Hey, since you're interested in scorpion biology, I thought you'd be interested in the idea of... intersex Chima scorpions! Well, sort of.

There's a specific character that's been bugging me a bit. Scutter is kind of the scorpion equivalent of a centaur; he has two torsos, one anthropomorphic, and another of the scorpion body. With scorpion anatomy in mind, it's easy to reach the conclusion that Scutter's reproductive organ would be heavily altered because of his body, making him intersex to a certain extent.

I hope this makes sense. I'm trying to look for possible trans rep in Chima characters (like in this example). What do you think of this idea?

Oh friend, you don't know the essay you just inspired.

You Opened This Can Of Worms, Now Lie In It

Some important bulletpoints before I get going, just to get all of my followers on the same page:

Disclaimer: I am a transgender nonbinary perisex individual. This means I am not intersexed (to my knowledge), I don't identify with the gender I was assigned at birth, and I don't identify as male or female. The closest thing to describing my gender is literally "no".

I am a strong advocate for making as many characters transgender as possible, regardless of "realism". That's why, in my own writing, half of the Scorpions are retroactively transgender (though they don't understand gender on the whole and most of them would probably be nonbinary if someone took fifteen minutes to explain gender, variable social constructs, and the concept of genitalia tying to gender roles) and also Razar is too on account of I said so.

Being intersexed does not inherently mean being transgender. There is a lot of discussion and individual choice between intersexed people about whether or not they're part of the queer community. It's a very individual thing, and I am not part of those discussions on account of not being intersex myself.

When it comes to humans and other beings with a level of sentience and sapience, the term "hermaphrodite" and its derivates are considered slurs. When talking about animals, hermaphrodite and its derivates are scientific terms. So in something like the Legends of Chima series and other humanoid-animal media, the proper term is "intersexed". (I noticed you used the term "intersex" in your ask, and I appreciate it!)

I know too much about scorpion mating and birth.

We're talking way too much about genitalia and gender tonight in regards to fictional characters.

I am genuinely delighted that you decided to drop in here to discuss this, because boy howdy do I have a lot of thoughts about transgender headcanons/representation and scorpions specifically! Scorpions are just. So damn cool.

Note for my fellow arachnophobes: There are no images attached to this post, but it's really easy to find videos of scorpions doing various things on YouTube, which is actually how I've been studying them.

Scorpion Sex, Mating, and Genitalia

Scorpions of both "genders" have genital opercula (singular: genital operculum), and their asses run up into their tails. In order to mate, they don't just do like horses. No no, buddy, they have a really weird, specific method!

In order to start wooing his potential mate, the male scorpion will lock chelae (pincers) with the female scorpion, and they will start to "dance". The male scorpion will drop a sperm packet onto the ground and lead the female scorpion over it. If the female scorpion is down, she'll basically squat and absorb the sperm packet into her body, which is then followed by a "mating plug" to keep it in while it does the fertilization thing.

(It's important to note that the courting process also contains "juddering", aka the male scorpion doing the dance that the stickbug meme did, and may also contain clerchical "kisses". Honestly, pretty romantic for an arachnid. And possibly tail-rubbing and sexual stinging. Scorpions are very kinky!)

(It's also important to note that some species of scorpions have been reported, though not reliably, to reproduce through parthogenesis.)

Post-coitus cannibalism has not been scientifically seen in scorpions, so the male scorpion is generally safe as long as he scadoodles.

Gestation in some scorpion species can last over a year, and different species can have anywhere from 2 to 100 little scorplings - the physical size of the scorpion is not necessarily tied to how many babies they'll have.

Also, scorpions give live birth!

The baby scorpion is essentially folded like a Fedex package and launched out of the womb. It will then unfold and climb on top of the mother to make way for its next sibling. These will hang onto the mother until their first molt, which happens as a group and launches them into the juvenile stage. After this, they will still stay with their mothers until their carapace finishes hardening and gaining color, at which point they hunt prey on their own and will wander off on their own terms.

Hey, Jasper, That's Pretty Fucked Up, But How Does This Tie Into Chima?

I'm getting there, hold your centaur scorpions!

This is where we get into the worldbuilding of the Legends of Chima series, the Character Encyclopedia, and our poor boy Scutter.

See, the Legends of Chima as a series is very much a product of its time. There is some rife ableism and questionable word choices in regards to the Crawlers (and Sir Fangar, but this isn't about him). According to the Character Encyclopedia, Scutter is "less evolved". There's a looong history of racism in using phrases like "evolution" in regards to other humans, so taking that and applying it to an animal world leaves us with some very strange dissonance, because it's used in Chima to mean animals turned into a more humanoid form by the Chi.

Because really, what is the Chi? It's a magical substance that, depending on how you read it, could be the animist spirit of the land (I say, as an animist myself), or it could be drugs. Or it could be any number of other things! I know one person who writes Chi as the blood of dead gods, which is metal as fuck!

Ultimately, it depends on how one is writing the Chi that makes the usage of phrases like "less evolved" more or less questionable than it was intended. We're all dragging around the corpse of a Lego theme across our writing desks anyway. And the way I go about answering the question of "what is Chi" is definitely different from others. (Again, see the dead god blood part.)

The question of whether or not the Scorpion Tribe, namely Scutter, would count as intersexed relies on 1) defining intersexuality in regards to genitalia arrangement (scorpions don't have penises and vaginas by default; and the Wikipedia article on scorpions just uses "genital orfice" or "genital opercula"); 2) determining if the Chi has magically changed how genitalia works for Scorpions (admittedly, I do this because I didn't want to have to use the term "genital opercula" over and over); 3) determining the humanization extent of the Scorpion Tribe as you write them (I lean more towards human than you do, just from what I've seen of your work); and 4) deciding if such terminology even exists in Chima.

But looking at Scutter and going with the assumption that the back end is fully scorpion... No, I wouldn't count him as intersex by default. Intersex implies landing between the two human biological extremes (which, as we all know, is not as cut-and-dry as high school biology taught us), when really he's kind of a secret third thing (a Scorpion who probably doesn't have either a penis or a vagina).

(Of course, there's also what you said, paraphrased to my own wording: the Chi may have just decided to fuck up this poor man's genital situation and do a half-ass job.)

That's not to say he can't be trans. I mean, I made Scorm and about half of the Scorpion Tribe trans already. That's also not to say they're not all trans by default, considering scorpions without the ability to think wouldn't have the concepts of genders anyway.

Okay Jasper, So How Do You Write Him?

So, here's the thing. I'm aromantic-asexual, and I also write smut and, to a lesser extent, romance, which means I think about fictional character genitalia too much. But thinking about Scutter has left me utterly baffled.

On one hand, I usually write the Chi as a magical animist force of the land of Chima on the whole, and part of that is that the Chi tries to get everyone on the same playing field, physically speaking, which is how we get retroactive transgender man Scorm in my Tales of Chima series.

On the other hand, look at him. Look at him. He's a centaur arachnid. I know he can pass the Harkness Test, but I still feel weird thinking about his genitalia. If I go with my theory of the Chi giving everyone penises and vaginas at random, then I don't want to think about how much that would get in the way for the poor boy! On the other hand, his lower body is still mostly scorpion instead of, well, Scorpion, so who's to say he doesn't have a genital operculum?

Too Long, Don't Want Details About Scorpion Sex

Alright, spoilsport. Here's your TLDR:

It genuinely depends on what the Chi does in your version of the story and how bad it fucks up. It depends on how dedicated you are to scientific accuracy. It depends on how much you want to think about scorpion genitals.

And being intersex is not necessarily trans rep, unless it is, unless it isn't. I'm not intersexed, so I'm not going to say what that falls on myself. There is an intersex pride flag that was created by Morgan Carpenter in 2013.

Trans characters can exist outside of being intersexed, you don't have to conflate the two in order to have transgender representation. Just hit the characters with the Transgenderinator 5000 Beam. Fuck realism, this is a series about walking talking animal people. Who's going to stop you? The fun police? Transphobes? Eat them.

Further Reading

Start at Wikipedia and go from there through its sources for anything of particular interest:

Intersex flag (in case you're curious about it and its history, which can also launch you into further reading about humans being intersex)

Scorpion (morphology section)

Scorpion (mating subsection)

Scorpion (birth and development subsection)

So, uh, yeah! Thanks for coming to me with these questions, it's really touching that you value my thoughts this much, and I love talking about my boys and scorpions and the complicated web! I apologize for any errors or too-crass sections, because I wrote most of this in one sitting after playing wayyy too much Skyrim today.

~Jasper

[bibliophile-in-training]

A Plebian's Review of the Last Voyage of the Demeter

I don't do reviews normally but I have many thoughts I wanted to share after recently watching this movie. In general, I did enjoy this movie and I thought it was a fun watch. As someone who read Dracula and enjoys most modern Dracula stories I would watch it again if it came on. (6/10)

Non-spoilers:

It took some liberties with the source material. Combine the recent Poirot movies with modern vampire lore and that's what you should expect, not something strictly adhering to the novel. Not necessarily a bad thing, but if you're enjoying dracula daily just know this isn't really that.

On that note, Dracula bibliophiles aside, it's a pretty good movie on its own. It's suited for modern audiences and won't confuse them with Stoker's vampire lore (ex. what can and can't kill a vampire, what powers Dracula has).

It had pretty gory moments that you may not be prepared for if slasher movies aren't something you watch. Also, check out doesthedogdie bc there are a lot of potential triggers.

The lighting for this movie was really good imo. There was a strong contrast between day and night which awesome, but you could also still actually see what was going on in the dark. There were a couple times when Dracula was in a shadow and you couldn't really see him but it was for effect as opposed to trying to be "realistic" (looking at you, GOT).

The design for Dracula was cool and they do play into him getting stronger and scarier as he continuously feeds.

The Captain is not the main character (in contrast to the source material's Captain's log). Here, it's Dr Clemens we follow and we get an occasional Caltain's narration from the log.

If you like Until Dawn and other titles from Supermassive Games, you'd probably enjoy it. Dracula's design, the kills, and character choices feel like you're watching a playthrough. Not to mention there are a lot of close-up shots of characters in the same way Supermassive Games does.

Spoilers under the cut:

The Good:

The cinematography was pretty good. I particularly liked shots that followed through the ship to the cargo hold where count bat boi was sleeping.

They also filmed the gory scenes really well, and one scene that stood out was when one person who's become a thrall bashes his head through a door and then slides his nose along the splintered panels as he looks up. Impactful to say the least. They didn't pan away and leave it up to our imaginations but went all in and I applaud it.

Things were recognizable from the novel (names, events, some vampire mythos). I was genuinely surprised that they marked Dracula's coffins with dragons and kept that he slept in dirt, since modern audiences probably wouldn't have known about these things. When we (modern audiences) hear "Dracula" we think it means "vampire" as opposed to "dragon", and we would likely expect Dracula's cargo to be velvet-lined coffins.

The opening scene (finding the ship at Whitby & the wagon train of the coffins) had me immediately invested and excited, and I was already looking forward to this movie (I chose it over Barbie lol).

The Captain's actor was phenomenal. He went all out when he was grieving Toby's death and he really didn't have to but I'm so glad he did. While the character itself wasn't consistent, the actor made it believable. He was strict and kind when he was sane, he was frantic and distraught when he was insane, and his moments of grief and hope were all palpable. Good choice.

"Oh my God it has wings" When I say I LAUGHED SO HARD

Honestly there were a lot of funny moments. Some were genuine to cut the tension and help build characters but being ND and desensitized to horror I don't know if I was supposed to laugh at some of them, like when the cook's dingy knocked against the side of the hull. And when vampire Toby jumped up.

The use of knocking was a cool addition. I enjoyed when they used it like when Toby was in trouble and when Dracula was messing with the two dudes on deck.

One of the key things of Dracula's personality is that yes - he can kill you in 10s - but he won't because he's a sadistic bastard that enjoys drawing it out and playing the wager to see if you'll die of fear before he can bite you. They absolutely captured it. Homie is purposeful in how he terrifies his victims before giving them a gruesome death.

I think the model ship they showed at the end was the original model ship for the Demeter in the 90's Dracula movie (or at least a nod to it), which is how this movie was started apparently. Nice touch.

The Grievances:

Dr Clemens was a mary sue. I'm sorry, there's no way around this. Man has bad main character syndrome. I can accept a black man fighting tooth and nail to graduate Cambridge top of his class and struggle in a world that won't see his abilities because they won't look past his skin color, but on top of that he's an astronomer, a sailer, a strategist, a detective, and everyone immediately falls in love with him? Hell, he cured Toby's [1] grief over losing his lifelong friend (Huck, the dog, who was MUTILATED) and [2] guilt for all the animals dying because it was his responsibility to take care of him, and [3] fear for whatever unknown thing did this, with a headpat and "sometimes shit happens and you can't do anything about it".

He took one look at Anna, Dracula's beef jerky ration, and immediately went "she has an infection, she needs a blood transfusion", then proceeded to give her repeated transfusions over several days and he was totally fine. Up running around and fighting vampires meanwhile in reality he would have been bedridden from lack of blood and possible complications from the procedures.

Also, why is he the only clean person? Everyone's covered in grime and blood and dude looks like he just walked out of a proactive commercial. Even when he's floating in the middle of the ocean for days with an open neck wound he looks like he was just in the shower. Compare it with the Captain's burns and the first thrall's face after banging the through a door and the dissonance just pulls me out of the movie.

Keeping him alive just to sequel bait. Just. Why. Hollywood, it's okay to kill your protagonist. 1912 did it really well. Plus, I personally wasn't invested enough in this character to want to see a sequel following his vendetta with Dracula. We already know about Jonathan and Van Helsing. You can make movies that stand alone. It's okay.

If you want to sequel bait why don't you have him delirious from being lost at sea for several days and end up at the asylum with Dr Seward and Renfield? That would actually be cool and you could still have Dracula show up to taunt him.

Also, in regards to Anna, while I think it was a cool idea to use her for lore dumping and as a surprise for the audience, I was disappointed with her. She had the potential to provide a lot of info and help fight Dracula but instead she had to be the "strong independent woman". I don't hate this trope (think about Ripley in Alien, or any of the women in the original novel) but it wasn't done well here. While it's cool to see her gain confidence and wield a gun against count bat boi I was really hoping she would provide more info like his weaknesses. She says "he ran out of food in my country" but we know this isn't *literally* true because we see people at the beginning. It's the fact her people knew how to keep Dracula away that he ran out of food and he decided to try greener pastures. You could bring up HOW they did that (religious tokens, garlic, silver, etc.).

Also when she does try to give info about Dracula it's still vague and meant to be mysterious. Bruh, you are locked on a boat with this monster and you know your only hope for survival is to flee or work together to get rid of him. Why are you not giving as much info and details as possible? Because that's what the script said bc the writers wanted to make dracula look cool by relying on the characters to say it? Okay.

This movie relies on a lot of telling instead of showing. It's like they don't trust their audience to pay attention or understand what's going on. The only time I legit felt they showed and not told (lol) was when the Captain asked if what happened to the animals could be transmitted to humans and Dr Clemens lied and said no. You could see in the actor's face the inner monologue of telling the truth vs preventing chaos. It was nice and gave more info about the character than him actually yelling his life history at the first mate.

It also suffers from the writers trying to make every scene be memorable. There are too many times characters say things because it sounds cool or would be good in the trailer rather than because it makes sense for the character to say that.

Honestly all the characters fall flat for me (besides the captain who's character is treated like a pinball). They're all archetypes rather than people. The protagonist. The independent woman. The racist drunkard. The child. The religious guy. The guy that makes obscene jokes. The only names I know are Toby, Dr Clemens, and Anna. Bc they get said a lot as opposed to me actually caring about them.

On that note, I am definitely biased because I loved the Captain's log from the novel, but I wish that this was from the Captain's pov, culminating in him tying himself to the wheel and dying from shock or exposure like in the book. Then Whitby.

On that note, I am still upset that they used modern vampire mythos yet again for Dracula. In the book the Captain dies after being taunted for days by Dracula after tying himself to the wheel, only possible because the rosary in his hand protects him. It's a noble but horrific sacrifice made of fear and a duty to not let the evil on the ship reach land. In this movie, however, he reaches the wheel and dies because the rosary has no power over Dracula (it's also how Toby dies).

Oh, also the sun kills vampires. How do we know? Because occasionally some people turn into vampires, but only when it's convenient for the plot (looking at you, Anna). Why don't they use this against Dracula and dump the dirt box they know he's sleeping in during the day? Who knows. But they wasted a lot of potential to play on the audience's expectations (rather than giving into them) by using Dracula during the day. Y'know what's scarier than a vampire picking off your crew at night? A vampire picking off your crew at ANY time when you only expect it at night because SURPRISE sunlight just doesn't let him crawl in lizard fashion.

Are you seriously telling me Dracula sustained himself off of Anna for several weeks, and then decided to slaughter the crew mere days before the boat docked? Yes, he was weak bc of it but I don't think the director knows how blood works (see Dr Clemens's transfusion issue). Also, if that's the case, how did Anna not suffocate in her dirt box for hours on end for weeks? Just fill the other 48 crates with dead people and say Anna was the last caprisun in the box and it would make more sense.

Also, why have their last hurrah be the day before they reach Whitby? It made the movie seem too fast; it felt like it only took a week to get from Transylvania to England. Why not find Anna early on, then disperse the crew member deaths across a couple weeks like in the novel? It would help with the suspense and you could have the Captain tie himself to the wheel then let us experience the time passing after he dies so the audience has a moment to sit with the deaths and feel hopeless. Bc that's what the role of the Demeter is, story-wise. It's supposed to make us afraid of Dracula and feel hopeless in his presence. Not give us hope and make him into our rival we have the possibility to get revenge on. That's what our dear friend Jonathan is for.

Dracula never takes human form. Why do all adaptations refuse to give him his bushy mustache? COWARDS.

Okay, he *sort of* takes human form. But they really just put him in a waistcoat and top hat then expected us to believe that showed he was cunning. You literally said he's both man and beast then only show the beast. One of Dracula's main appeal is that he's clever and his sadistically human traits are the only thing preventing him from immediately ripping you to shreds. And he can pass as human, so he could be anyone. Yet we only see the beast part.

While this movie was fun to watch, it comes off more as a gruesome drama or action movie than a horror. I never really feel any suspense or dread. Compare it to Alien which had the same situation. Alien did such a good job of making you feel scared and claustrophobic when you're surrounded by the vastness of space (in this case, the ocean) and being hunted down by an intelligent monster. I was watching this to see how Dracula killed people rather than seeing how they struggled to survive.

I can believe this movie was in production hell not just because of the writing but some errors. In one scene, the Captain's burn is on the right side of his face but there's a close-up cut and suddenly it's on the left side like someone flipped the screen. And this is just one error out of a couple. No Starbucks cups tho.

It sounds like I don't like this movie because of all of my nit-picking grievances, but I really did like it. I think my issues are just because my expectations were too high going in. I was expecting a loyal expansion of an underappreciated segment of a classic novel, which is really rare these days. And a *suspenseful* horror.

I see why Guillermo del Toro and Stephen King suggested it. It's pretty similar to their stuff, just more fast-paced. So if you like that stuff and Until Dawn I think you'll really enjoy it.

[inhelluv]

❛⠀Famished 🫀

fic Hannibal Lecter × OC [ chapter 1 ]

tw for fic: cannibalism, horror, nsfw, gore, smut;

A woman needs to go through a tough psychological evaluation before she can get the freedom she longs for, but her 'psychiatrist' seems bent on bringing out the worst in her.

At some point during her adolescence, Rose was officially deemed a lost cause. On an ostensibly tranquil morning, one could find the girl bloodied in front of the principal’s office because she had violently bitten a classmate’s ear during a fight, or perhaps because she had stabbed another girl with a pen.

For reasons unknown to her, Rose was almost always angry. She would be angry at people for being happy, angry for being underestimated, and —mostly— angry for being alone. Even if it was her own fault.

The girl concluded that there was a 'monster' inside her, something evil that had possessed her body. Perhaps like Jekyll and Hyde?

Well, whether in the orphanage or at school, people always avoided her like the plague, and Rose certainly preferred it that way. At some point, she was committed against her will to a psychiatric facility; the girl despised that place, feeling like a caged animal time and again.

Rose had to learn to contain herself, to behave, to pretend she felt nothing in order to finally escape from what lay within her. She passed all the tests, swallowed all the pills they gave her, and smiled whenever it seemed necessary. Her last challenge now was a... psychiatrist?

Hannibal Lecter, some sort of renowned man who constantly aided the police in capturing psychopaths, serial killers, and other types of criminals. People like the thing 'inside' her.

( . . . )

"Rose? Are you ready?" whispered the nurse who accompanied her, standing before the door of the beautiful office of her unknown evaluator.

She glanced briefly at the policeman in the corner, standing tall and awaiting the potential 'outburst' that Rosa might have.

"I am."

The door opened. Rose couldn't contain her surprise. She had imagined her psychiatrist to be an old, bald man, perhaps grumpy and repulsive like the others she had met.

What she saw before her was a tall, elegant person in a suit, kind and curiously handsome. He smiled upon seeing her, and something in her chest resonated with the feeling of danger.

"Miss Rose, I presume. Please, come in," he said in a velvety tone, gesturing for her to enter.

A few seconds of silence passed.

"Are you Doctor Hannibal?" Rose asked, raising an eyebrow as she saw him blink softly.

"Most of the time, Miss."

Did psychiatrists really need to be so enigmatic? A genuine doubt arose, and she pressed her lips together to avoid saying anything petulant in front of them.

Once they were alone in the room, she sat in the chair, feeling the strange sensation of danger resurface.

"I read that you had some incidents in your youth. You bit off a classmate's ear..."

"I was angry. I regret what I did."

"Oh, you regret it?" Hannibal looked at her, a short smile on his lips.

"Do you find this amusing?" she asked, her gaze narrowing involuntarily.

"I do."

"I regret what I did back then," repeated, almost as if affirming it to herself.

He resumed reading, subtly curling his lip to one side, remaining silent as he tapped his foot lightly on the floor.

"You ate the boy's ear."

"I vomited seconds later."

"But you tried."

Rose gritted her teeth, clenching her fists in irritation. She had already said she regretted it; why did he keep bothering her with something that happened years ago?

"What kind of session is this?!"

"I want to help you, Rose."

A simple response, adorned with a smile from someone who gazed at her like a sage. They remained silent for the rest of the session, staring at each other in silent scrutiny, she had no idea what was going on in his mind, while Hannibal Lecter seemed determined to uncover what was happening in hers.

How was she supposed to convince him that she was sane?

( 🫀 )

It's been a while since I last wrote a fanfic, and I thought I could mix my little obsession with Hannibal into this project.

English isn't my first language, so please excuse any mistakes you might see in my writing T - T

[moonspirit]

I know most of your nsfw asks are aruani, but what would you think of a Very Not Healthy Poly relationship between the Alliance pre rumbling.

Like

Post S3 Eren making EMA poly a thing, but bcs he's pulling away and he's not as open, both Armin and Mikasa are suffering due to lack of emotional bonding. After a while, Mikasa starts trying harder while Armin gets a small breakdown due to it being only about sex.

Jean having both the looks and the reputation, and using sex as a coping mechanical while adamantly refusing to admit it is a coping mechanism.

Connie having genuine rizz and Sasha having her 300k+ slowburn with Niccolo.

Jearmin happening after Armin hatefucking Floch after a really low moment w Jean doing the actual aftercare.

On the other side of the ocean Reiner having many people jump at him for his honorary marleyan status, women specifically for the marriage benefits, but Reiner being unable to actually do it bcs of all the blood that won him the reputation.

Bonus if EMA started w Eremika just going at it while Armin was in the room till he mentioned it and then they invited him to join.

Just, really fucked up sex dynamics between traumatised teenagers w no access to therapy

[N/SFW]

Ahaha, hello and no problem, all ideas welcome~!

Veeerrryyy intriguing tho! I don't have much trouble imagining this because 1. It's not healthy, yes!! And 2. These kids have been through way too much to not resort to the easiest way to forget everything and feel good - sex.

I've said it before, but sex can be a profoundly deep ritual to go through, it has the potential to transcend visible boundaries of tangible emotion. At the same time, sex can also become one of the easiest things to turn to in times of weakness. Given the multitude of issues our characters have, it's possible to picture them depending on sexual pleasure as a means of consoling themselves from various lows.

EMA are a whole other level of unhealthy tho. Eren's emotional distance and bottling up, Mikasa's fear of ruining everything by asking for what she really wants and Armin's self-doubt and insecurity over his place among them. Man, I can imagine any kind of poly relationship between them (particularly one that's sexual) teeming with awfully unhealthy vibes. In a way sex becomes the closest thing they have to proper communication - it's easier to express things via body language than putting them in words, a thing that's especially a problem for Armin because he's not bad with words and would really like to receive verbal reassurance... but unfortunately, the other two are terrible at it. And at some point, when the sex too, grows obsolete for obvious reasons, it's just plain suffering because nobody's getting what they want.

Ugh, pain.

Jean really seems to me (and this is a personal hc of mine) to be someone who is very aware of his appeal and his attractiveness, wants to use it for his own pleasure, but is unable to really find any satisfaction from it. What he craves is some deep emotional connection, something that is precious and treasured. Casual sex, then, is only a temporary way out of the despair of not having such a relationship, and offers him a few minutes of high while sending him to the ditch right afterwards.

Jearmin tho? Oh boy. I can see Armin giving in to hate sex tendencies with Floch lol, what with how he can become self-destructive at the hands of someone who doesn't really appreciate him or take care of him - in fact, that's an heavily abusive relationship that can also be hard to get out of. But Jean being the one to deliver aftercare to Armin, telling him the real things he needs to hear and comforting him, melting away the lies and cruel words he just received at the hands of Floch, seems to me to be the one tiny shred of wholesome-ness in all of these terribly unhealthy relationships lol.

Pre-rumbling Connie's the only normal one here. Really. And Sasha really does deserve her fairytale romance with Niccolo ft. Plenty of food (this was gold haha xD).

When it comes to Reiner though. Really nice point you make about him not being able to get it on with the people that flock to him because of his sins - I've never thought of it that way! It makes sense tho - he's a deeply guilty character, shouldering nearly all of (if not entirely) the weight of RBA's mission on Paradis. He has a conscience, and maybe he will think he doesn't even deserve the small pleasures of the flesh because of what he did. The denial is a punishment he inflicts on himself.

You can't forget Annie and Pieck tho. They too carry so much of trauma. More so Annie, who is touch starved, has never been loved or cared for, has only been used for her lethality, and was forced into a mission she had no desire for. I see her hungrily devouring any kind of emotional connect she gets, especially if that's sex, since it's easier as mentioned before. She's really not good with words either, so yeah, sex to offer some temporary relief and make her feel like she's actually something more than just a weapon of war.

The same for Pieck. Among all of the warriors, she's always seemed the most sensible to me, pragmatic and grounded in reality. She, more than anyone else, knows her place in the world, as an Eldian, as a warrior, and as a shifter. With Annie gone, she probably had nobody to really "talk" to or become close with, and while I see her recognizing that sex isn't the solution for her loneliness, she's still a human and a young girl at that; for a few minutes during the act, she feels connected to someone. And who can blame her for that?

A lot of wonderful potential for character exploration here ._. Thank you for sharing!

[dykecubes]

Sorry for talking about four year old discourse but

Now that I’m on the topic of the old as fuck tommyinnit lesbian discourse and I went back and rewatched the clips and almost all of them are literally just like.

Yes they’re jokes but they’re all jokes about questioning one’s gender and sexuality and finding solidarity and community among queer people, and while, yes, they are most likely just jokes there are also moments in them that feel genuine, in the first one where his chat calls him a lesbian and he pauses for a second before deciding not to follow that train of thought on stream he seems to be seriously considering it for a moment before saying “no, let’s not think about that on stream”, another quote he was cancelled for was (verbatim) “I don’t know if I’m a lesbian, I know it comes with time and you have to figure it all out but I don’t know if I could be, if I qualify, I sure hope I do”, and in the “I get lesbians” clip he immediately follows it up with “I love ‘em and I understand them”

Honestly from my perspective as a lesbian the latter two are really sweet sentiments to me and felt relatable

I want to make it clear I will never be a truther for any content creator I’m just saying this to make a point but if he had actually been questioning his identity like he jokingly implied through these clips what a fucking way to ensure someone never so much as thinks about coming out of the closet again, in that moment where he got that message in his chat calling him a lesbian something seemed to click for him, even if it was a joke or he played it off as one he was suddenly confronted with the possibility that he could just be a lesbian only to immediately be confronted later that day with thousands of people telling him he’s a terrible person for being a man and so much as thinking he could maybe be a lesbian. What if it had turned out that these weren’t jokes? What if in those moments he had actually genuinely questioned his identity, even if it was just for a moment?

We’ll probably never know but regardless the response to these moments are almost exactly the same as why I hid parts of my identity in queer spaces, for the longest time I hid my pronouns and gender identity on twitter and tiktok especially because you’re “not allowed” to be a lesbian and identify with boyhood or he/him pronouns, or further back I hid my lesbianism all together because lesbians and asexuals are opposites

There’s also something to say about how people in theory believe that you shouldn’t assume someone’s gender/sexuality, yet the possibility of a person online who isn’t open about their sexuality potentially being queer is a fundamental impossibility for them

Idk, I’m probably thinking far too much into this but the tl;dr is I don’t think we should be harassing boys en masse for wondering if they could maybe be dykes

[ad-hawkeye]

Man after reading the previous ask i just wanted to commiserate a bit.

Even though lukerosa is my otp since launch, i’ve always been most charmed by artem, who was so awkward and sincere and sweet. I adore how supportive artem and rosa have been of each other from the very beginning and in any version of events i like to imagine that they grow to become close friends and partners-in-crime-fighting. Their immense mutual respect and admiration is just a great foundation for a relationship.

Now, I have more of an attachment to the pre-1st anniv cards because i’m a sucker for mutual pining, but i’ve enjoyed the post-anniv cards too because it felt like a natural progression of their relationship. To find out that the writing quality for artem’s stories eventually gets worse and worse is very disheartening. When the writing starts out amazing but becomes terrible later on, it is always worse because it feels like a betrayal.

I’m going to keep playing ToT especially since he’s not my only fave, but I really hope the writing gets better again, artem deserves only the best, most tightly-written, and consistent characterisation. And I hope even more that his soon-to-be-announced 3rd anniv card is good — if it can redeem the previous bad cards… well that’s the dream.

Thank you for reading! I hope you’re having fun despite all this :)

so i was going to answer my asks in the morning (it's been a long day for me!) but this ask was literally the sweetest thing i have ever read, i had to respond asap ;_;

as a fellow lukerosa enjoyer (their interactions are always such a treat!!! they're the best genre of childhood friends to lovers due to that eight year time skip and the draaaama that comes with it. i still think about luke's personal story 4 to this day i SWEARRRR), genuinely thank you for the kind words, it really means a lot!! 😭😭

i totally agree with your thoughts on artem's earlier cards, you took the words right out of my mouth :,,) we're also on the exact same wavelength of the pre-1st anniversary cards - they're my absolute most cherished favorites. entwined fate, lost gold, sickness and in health, skadi, railroad, first birthday, aaaa..... some of my absolute favorites.. the original personal stories 1-4 are my favorites across the board too (my favorites definitely being artem's and luke's !!)

gosh yeah i think that's why i'm so upset! i genuinely and truly adore artem as a character, and i adore his older cards. this is to the point where i used all of my saved s-chips on the previous select-an-ssr banner to get his railroad card instead of his second anniversary card!!

to make it even more baffling, i haven't noticed a quality drop like this in the other boys?! if anyone reading is a fan of the other three, feel free to correct me if i'm wrong, but luke, marius, and vyn's cards all stay very consistent personality and plot wise imo. i can't help but wonder if something happened to artem's writing team?? the writing literally feels so different, i can't explain it. it's like. a lack of understanding of his charm. they dont understand why people liked him, or any of the more nuanced aspects to his character and his dynamic with rosa.

i miss them being Best Partners with artem's dry sense of humor and rosa cheering him on over the most mundane of a shit (like posing against a wall HAHA) and them taking their time and artem opening up and becomimg genuine friends who make jokes and tease each other and the strong mutual respect and consent and ;-;;; sniff

and aw thank you for the kind words!!!! i hope you're having fun too!! wishing for an absolutely touching card for lukerosa as well :) <3 year three has fantastic potential for some prime hurt/comfort angst and fluff for those two!!