#he’s actually so cool it’s NAWT funny

[jinkiesmariz]

Nobody talks about how crazy @jurygarroth s art is like jaw dropping ly pretty bEAUTIFULLL such a consistent quality and ouuuuuhgghhjjed I can’t put it into words anytime I see any bits of his work i like Fall to my knees and curl into a prayer because what the hell!!! What the hell!!! Lucy is such a nice guy too like sorry to get sappy on main but he’s so cool and silly and funny and just a pleasure to be around AND this motherfuvker has the prettiest art known to man and some of the neatest MCD headcanons Ive Seen??? Idm im just like on the floor because what the hell hes so cool we should hunt him for sport….

[angeltism]

holy shit will and the others would do numbers on here

[seokjinsonlyone]

now i just wanna talk about jungkook as a personal trainer

like why can i see him falling for someone he helps like not even someone who's like a super fit regular gym goer like let's say you just start going randomly and one day you're trying to figure out how to use one of the machines and he sees you struggling and comes up next to you and tells you how to do it and of course you stop breathing bc this is obviously the hottest person you've ever seen in your life and you are NOT feeling attractive rn but you let him help you with it and smile and thank him when he's done and you think that's the end of it until you go back the next day and he's there again and he spots you out and approaches you makes sure you're doing okay and you assure him that everything's good but he lingers around you a lil pointing stuff out fixing your form when necessary and you understand he's doing his job but you really did NAWT ask for help so you're a lil irritated and that goes on for like 5 business days before you lose the polite smile and are just like "you know what. i GOT it" bc you cannot work out in peace when he is there right around you making you nervous

and he gets it once you start being a bit short with him that he needs to get lost but he's oddly drawn to you and he can't help himself so he says hi when he sees you asks how you are and then goes about his business and you're grateful that he backs off a bit so you can actually focus on your workout but it kinda burn you up to see him helping out other girls the way he was helping you which is stupid bc in your head there's no way he would ever be into you he was just doing his job the only consolation you get is that you still feel his gaze on you as you do your thing like every time you happen to see him he already looking at you and it's actually a good thing bc one day you're doing squats and you overestimate yourself legs are more wobbly than you anticipate and you almost drop the bar but he's there in an instant helping you and your heart is beating fast adrenaline coursing through your system bc that could've been bad and he scolds you for squatting without a spotter and tells you to come find him whenever you need one

so then there's a dedicated two days a week he's spotting you on leg day and it's kinda the highlight of his week and not just bc he get to see what that booty do in them leggings 😭🙏 he finds out in between sets how cool and funny you are and gets a little greedy and mentions how you should book a full session with him and you laugh it off the first couple times he says it but then you realize he's being serious and as good as spending a whole hour with this man sounds you not about to pay for a whole session like you not that dedicated to the gym life and you tell him as much but then he offers to do it for free and you can't help but agree to it and honestly after his workout you think that he hates you bc he tried to kill you and he offers to buy you dinner as an apology which fries your brain bc up until this point you were so sure that he was just being friendly and doing his job but now you're not so sure

and dinner is awkward bc you weren't even sure when you crossed the threshold of being friends much less whatever this whole thing was and you didn't even know what to order like you were out with this super hot personal trainer like were you supposed to order a salad? some broccoli?? you didn't know but then he ordered a really indulgent burger and some fries so you didn't feel bad for following suit but you definitely didn't eat the whole thing even though you could've you had to beat the pig allegations and you were even more confused about what that was when he paid for your meal at the end like was that a date or was he just chivalrous you had no clue and you didn't have time to figure it out afterward either bc life got in the way

and jk felt so stupid bc he wasn't nearly as forward as he wanted to be didn't flirt enough didn't kiss you like he wanted or hold your hand didn't even realize until he got home that he didn't have your number and he wanted to kick himself but he assumed that he would be able to make up for it the next time he saw you except that never came after the first week he thought maybe you were out of town after the second he thought maybe you were readjusting after getting back when it came to the third week and you still hadn't shown up he was worried so he looks up your file in the system and gets your number and he's really not supposed to use that for personal use and he hopes you don't mind but like he can't keep letting time pass like this so he texts you and finds out that you don't mind that he has your number and that you're fine physically at least just stressed and busy and he's asking if there's anything he can do to help and you're like unless you're a pint of ice cream i don't think so next thing you know he's asking what's your favorite flavor and then he's asking for your address and then he's in your house with your favorite ice cream and you're ??????

and next thing you know he's on your couch sitting next to you spoon feeding you bites of ice cream and that's when you're finally like "do you like me?" and he doesn't even try to deny it he's just like "yeah" and you're like okay and you just sit there cuddling him on the couch for the rest of the night while you process this turn of events and you just kind of exist in that state of knowing he likes you for a few days which makes him anxious bc he knew where he was at but he didn't know where you were at like you let him come over and hold you and you talked and laughed and flirted but you didn't say so explicitly so he was ????? until you were walking him out the fifth day after he confessed and when he reached to hug you you cupped his cheeks instead and rolled up on your tippy toes and kissed him like caught him completely off guard so when you pulled away he was all blushy and it made you wonder how someone so big and buff could be such a baby but he was your baby now you guessed you had to make sure though first so you asked "are you my boyfriend?" and he had to make sure first too so he asked you "do you like me?" and you were like "yeah" so he went "yeah okay i'm your boyfriend then. and you're my girlfriend" and he was glad that he could finally focus at work again bc he seriously spent so much time worried about you he was feeling neglectful to his other clients and you told him that you were glad he could focus now but if he treated any of his other clients the way he was treating you that you would kill him and y'all lived happily ever after the end <333

a/n: i blame the last ask and jk's most recent live for this particular rambling

[aztarion]

hiii jez, your sol tag is incredible and i love everything about her!! best aesthetic & best most fucked up vampire bbgirl of all time <3 do you have any interesting facts or random tidbits of lore about her that you are willing to share or link me to? wish to know everything & more about her asap tysm 🥰

whaaaat hi bree!! 😭 that oc tag is so thrown together and unorganised girl youre insane putting yourself through that but omfg its til death do us part now 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

i dont really post writing with my ocs much on tumblr but i blabbered for like an hour here im so sorry in advance i hope its a little entertaining…. tw for ed mention and self harm but its just your regular vtm stuff if youre familiar with the background ttrpg

soledad is her courier alias, she usually goes by that or the inevitable nickname sol, which doubles as a small remnant of her old life — her real name is solona ^^

she is first gen mexican-filipina, grew up in california before moving to arizona

didn’t care for academics much; preferred working with her hands — she dropped out of studies as soon as it was acceptable and went into business training under her dad and older brother as a mechanic

very laidback, easygoing, quietly contented; never had sprawling ambitions or aspirations and she was cool with that (was and is a little bit of a perfectionist with her work tho). this created a wedge with her mom who did nawt like the notion of her only daughter wasting prime years and a pretty face in a dingy garage. (i never get it *exactly* how i want in art & have never found a faceclaim i love, but i kinda picture her overall look as like. a timeless, slightly restless sort of dark beauty; like her eyes are always trying to tell you something in spite of herself, even when she looks totally serene lol)

anyway! one of moms fears are realized — sol ends up with a very noticeable facial scar (semi glasgow smile? mouth to under ear and a little further than that even, cheek just super spliced) due to an accident in the garage. sad! oh well she’s the joker now (or she will be after julian)

wait actually while im yapping about backstory i deviate a little from the game options just to make things more juicy and personal but! to me she first meets julian having to work on his suzuki and they hit it off. pre-night road as mentioned she is very easygoing — easily charmed and is herself charming — they def get along like a house on fire. julian would no doubt mentally take note of her whole roll-with-the-punches, laissez-faire attitude — naturally that just seems like a quality that might come in handy when you bite someone and turn them into a creature of the night. also the attentive, methodical approach she takes to her work, and when needed, her on the spot workarounds — he doesn’t want some dumb unreliable chump childe. and alright bear with him here: so it’s not relevant strictly in terms of her being thee potential great american embrace candidate he may be planning for right now, but man shes kiiiiinda cute and the scar is kiiiiiiiinda badass and its kiiiiinda hot that she knows exactly what she’s doing under the hood.…….Julian’s of course no slouch but he prefers it when others are doing the dirty work for him and she knows her stuff. so he’s thinking yeah this might work out. wait did she just say she plays nintendo too — oh this is definitely working out.

well it didn’t work out — sol ends up caitiff. julian accidentally botched her embrace 👍 whoops. but he teaches her blood sorcery as soon as possible — she can fly under the radar as a regular banu haqim. so it does work out! the sire/childe bond likely did some heavy lifting in terms of their relationship but sol was still pretty dopey heart eyes for julian in the beginning, like truly thought he was brilliant and funny and followed whatever he said no questions — really trusted him, figured with him being more experienced and so whipsmart and knowledgeable that he was utterly infallible. julian knew best and like didn’t he keep her safe trying to cover for the whole clanless thing……how could he have anything but Good Intentions dot dot dot……

in the decade after julian goes MIA, sol’s entire demeanor takes a nosedive. in the ingame text, julian and d’espine are described as being ‘fledgling-like’ in that they still have that liveliness to them, like a constant subtle Blush of Life effect. sol had that too in the years w julian, but after so long alone and having to maintain that isolation in order to ghost by in both the human world and undead while drugrunning & couriering, she gets cold — corpse and mind. outwardly she’s very composed; there’s little to no animation (no once-effortless smile, not even a ghost of the dimple in her unscarred cheek ! ) but her inner monologue is distrustful, has aged — is honestly a little paranoid and bitter sometimes — and overly nervous where she once would never have been. when julian returns it’s noted how young he still seems in comparison. that doesnt help the grudge she holds

i think her nerves skyrocket even more so when she feels aila stir. while u cant choose merits/flaws in night road like the table top, i feel like she would have the bulimic derangement that causes a kindred to gorge or throw up blood at random after feeding due to stress — she’s literally just THAT internally anxious. the game makes a point ensuring youre well fed on your next visit to tucson’s elysium since you showed up starving at the beginning, but after the office confrontation with lettow asking what happened to aila — which despite going successfully & having an excellent relationship with him — sol still probably LEGS it out of the viper once dove interrupts and ends up vomiting in an alley before jumping in her car🤦‍♀️ so much for paying alexander to acquire blood and making a good impression this time…..what a waste. and u know what Riga probably saw the whole mortifying ordeal too smh

ok im sorry i could talk abt the entire game like this i have so many headcanons

ooh straight up just facts & a little tldr:

so she’s 5’8; long pretty neck, slim hourglass figure with soft heavy curves, distinctly confident arms and legs, various tattoos: depictions of scorpions and snakes, the sun, spanish and tagalog script in black and red ink. she’s around whatever Julian’s human age wouldve been, i guess mid twenties range

is Julian’s Childe but due to a botched embrace ends up caitiff. masquerades as a banu haqim that, when in the presence of more prejudiced vampire society, in turn masquerades as something traditionally camarilla-fronting: malk/toreador/ventrue, whatever. it’s complicated! por los clavos de cristo does she wish she was back in that shitty little garage 20 yrs ago

throws up when nervous; is constantly a little hungry and risking an oops moment but for the most part maintains iron composure — its become a whittled and useful hard shell

learns blood sorcery right off the bat from julian, learns protean from lettow after staking reremouse w him. she usually keeps things clean and impersonal with a gun and deft precision (and elena with more guns!) but she still likes working with her hands: in close combat, especially when it involves other supernaturals, she keeps elena out of the fight and doubles up that weird combo of blood sorcery + protean — is frankly just a messy blur of slit wrists bloody sigils and slashing claws. (ough wanna draw this ugly visual so bad but omg i just know it wouldn’t work out w my skillset rn)

omg i feel like ive gone on forever in a bunch of directions while saying nothing helpp. ill stop here and spare you! thank you so much for asking bree!! :D <3 you have to tell me about your courier now!!

^ us night roading

[photographerstanheight]

FIRST DEAD BODY I'VE EVER SEEN...

THEY LOOK DIFFERENT IN REAL LIFE. THEY DON'T MOVE.

Hi. I'm Adam. Adam Stanheight. 26 years old. He/Him, what else do I say... I got no goddamn clue what I am. Bi? Gay? Pan? Don't give a shit. Women are cool. Men are fucking great. Like all those kinds of people. I'm that one guy, you probably know me, from that fucking bathroom shithole or whatever. It fucking sucked. ...And now I'm here. Posting on some random website I thought was interesting, plus it's full of freaks to make fun of. What will I post exactly? No fucking idea. Cats, photos I've taken, maybe some death threats to Jigsaw... By the way Jigsaw go kill yourself. Old Prick. Anyway. Do whatever. I really don't give a shit, you wanna talk? Talk. You wanna send memes? Send memes. Make sure they're fucking funny. You wanna whine to me about how sad your sorry life is? Go right ahead. I'm not a therapist so I'll probably laugh in your face.

Everyone shut the fuck up we have a fucking art fridge now this is a new addition yes I’m serious

Art 1. (Mr Millipede ily /p)

Art 2. (Aka me kissing billy its canon)

Art 3. (Smiling friends… smiling friends save me…)

Art 4. (Me and the HOMIE!!! A COUPLE OF BFFSSS!!! Unless… WHO SAID THAT!!!!)

By the way look at my cool ass cat. Her name is Mabel.

OOC UNDER THE CUT

Frowns... Hi chat... It's me... Dew... Sighs....... I have been uncovered from the depths of hell.... sad face emoji... but hi :,]

I'm sure all my mutuals will come swarming so i'm not gonna go thru the whole junk ab pronouns or whatnot ugh... he/him just in case. also don't be weird. I am an adult and yeaes ... so yeah if i see age below 18 i will nawt be doing weird 18+ stuff BITES OWN ARM OFF

But heeeeeyyyy, I'm a chainshipping, rustynailshipping and yapping FREAK so i made this to hopefully hang out w chatters... but also i wanna bother the fuck outta apprentices and other people sorry not sorry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Erm.. what else... my writing of Adam will be that he's trans!!!!! Omg ur transgener... That is so cool... He has top surgery but not bottom surgery,, guh... girl queen pussy boss....

AAAAnd I think I'm gonna let a bit of my chaos out so expect poootentially sooome sexual schtuffs?? Yours truly has some sillies in mind as a hypersexual loser like myself... I won't make it his whole personality tho idk :P

How did Adam get out of the trap? I don't fucking know and I am too goddamn lazy to think of it rn. I'll post tho when I actually can think , puts splinters in my eyes

Tags... lame. Whatever yapyap i'm a loser and i like 2 b fan see

|📸| ~ 𝑴𝑶𝑫 𝑻𝑨𝑳𝑲𝑺. - ya boy is yapping

|📸| ~ 𝑨𝑫𝑨𝑴 𝑨𝑵𝑺𝑾𝑬𝑹𝑺. - ask replies ofc

|📸| ~ 𝑨𝑫𝑨𝑴𝑺 𝑰𝑵𝑻𝑬𝑹𝑨𝑪𝑻𝑰𝑶𝑵𝑺. - hes talking to people waoah,...

|📸| ~ 𝑨𝑫𝑨𝑴𝑺 𝑹𝑨𝑴𝑩𝑳𝑰𝑵𝑮𝑺. - he's talking!!!!! just for fun

|📸| ~ 𝑷𝑯𝑶𝑻𝑶𝑮𝑹𝑨𝑷𝑯𝑺. - beginning to roleplays perhaps idk i just like to have them

anyway erm... face reveal!!!!

[mellohiizz]

Heh.... guess whos back to yap even more.... (its glitchduo anon) if this is too long and you dont want to reply thats totally cool however i saw you were interested in ashs character and i just HAD to assist...

(Everything neg here is about the characters not ccs btw, most of it is /aff anyways :3)

Ok so im assuming you know the general gist of s4 which is kind of all i know about it aside from like one or two vods ive fully watched. You also probably know about swagdoons which are the enemies to lovers (sometimes) of lifesteal and they try to kill each other but kiss afterwards..... they are the yaoi ever but ill try to be less insane about them to keep this rant focused

most of my REAL info about ash is from mid s5 and s6 which is when i started watching streams more than the videos, however i know he tries to portray himself as the big scary villain in s4 but honest to god he was apologizing PROFUSELY for the smallest things that guy is NAWT a truly heartless villain although he is pretty selfish and greedy but. Well:

before getting into his character i thought he like fully hated everyone, would never try to help someone else, was a general asshole etc etc but the more i paid attention to him the more i realized that yeah i guess he is those things but there is at least one person he gives a shit about (squiddo) and by god does he care a LOT about her

he also is pretty pathetic actually.... when his peace thing in s5 didnt work out he immediately went back to trying to be evil and selfish in s6... hmm its almost like he reverts back to hating everyone before they think hes a loser hmmm... its also really funny because this guy can BARELY pvp so he's very all or nothing on his dramatic gestures (eg he cant take over the server with pvp so he does it with the wormhole which imo is 500% more impressive, although i dont know very much about pvp)

despite him being pathetic he is def a force to be reckoned with, hes very idle until provoked and the provokation is usually out of spite and malice but that guy will stop at Nothing to get what he wants once he has a good enough motive (and doesnt have collage work)

he also gives me false god vibes but like... hes sort of AWARE hes a false god but does not want to admit it At All. i think its really interesting that the season after he became god he was made a host for a god (he actually confirms hes possesed by the commisioner/overseer/lifesteallord when he talks as them btw absolutely wild) and i think it would be cool if that was intentionally to like. Humble him. Show him a real god, not just an immortal guy with flying powers

(This is a little more of a headcanon but i think its feasable) i think that since his s5 loss, being his first major loss in any season ever, hes lost a sense of self in lifesteal, sitting in his house thats too big with empty walls and emptier reasoning. not to mention hes teamless and his only ally/friend is squiddo and thats not even official 😭😭

so yeah my guy is Going Through It... someone get this man hot chocolate and a warm blanket or maybe a picnic with his Best and Only Friend 🙁🙁

(Oh yea if you want a general idea of s5 onwards and dont have time for streams or really long cinematic videos i would recommend squiddos videos on it, theyre rarely over 15-20 minutes and there are only seven right now so you can get through them in a few days if you're REALLY crunched for time ^_^)

hello again glitchduo anon!! giggles i kind of know some general lore?? but mostly out of things i see on here about it, or like clips/vods i'm able to watch when i have time? so yeah... ash's character is very interesting to me, and honestly, what you said about him aligned pretty well with what i did see of him, but like... not in lifesteal, but the character he played in spoke's unstable videos. bro was literally begging for attention and alliance, and then turned around and BOOM twist villain jumpscare he's actually evil... he was acting off the whole time (ignoring mapicc, probably because he knew mapicc was harder to manipulate, and being very obnoxious about getting close to spoke in particular), so that checked out (sorry, i can yap about unstable for so long, im so insane about it) but yeah, i really really enjoy watching him do his thing, and i want to study him in a lab like a weird microorganism or something definitely was getting the false god vibes too btw from i did see of him in lifesteal (which was mostly just other people's vods) actually the whole being host of a god sounds so interesting?? that's definitely the first time i heard about something like this and i love everything having to do with possessions and stuff like that definitely one of the top characters i actually want to know more about (second close is minutetech i'd say) and don't worry, i really like reading what you send in, it actually helps a lot and it's very interesting!! the moment i opened my inbox and saw a lot of text i was like "oh yeah i know who this is from" (/hj/aff btw) thank you for taking the time to give me more knowledge i guess :33 !!

[opiumsturn]

STURNIOLO THEORY 1/7/24

(did not do capilizations nd punctuaction nor did i check spelling on this cs idc)

Okay now this may seem crazy and so un-true but what if the triplets are quitting?

i do NAWT wanna hear : 'its like u want them too' or 'you guys are getting outta hand this is why they wanna quit' mixaroo type bullshit thanks! ITS A THEORYYYY

Now with everything happening this could 100% be abt The Laura theory but hear me out.

When Chris' acc got banned the first time he mention Laura was the one who got it back for him so what if Laura felt salty if she actually did get fired and got his acc banned same way she got it back. Other hand could be what if they really do quit what if he asked Laura to get his acc banned because he wanted to delete it but knew it would be too obvi if he did so he got it banned instead

Matt- lets start with the tiktok "You'll never find someone like me" this one could be abt Laura because from what we know Matt has not been in a relationship in a while so why would he post a tiktok like that if we didnt know it js wouldnt make sense and he also does not post content like that soo?? now with his videos being gone besides one. i 100% believe there has to be something about that tiktok that means something. i mean why that one? Now there are so many reasons to get rid of Laura but what if one was because they are ready to quit and wont need a manager anymore?.. think abt it

Nick- Now nick has always been on tiktok and is the most active on his own from matt and chris and hes more active on not js tiktok but also ig and snap and he hasnt been on either recently. but back to tiktok why would he remove over 500 fucking posts?! maybe all those post are what show their life as ytbers and if they quit he doesnt want people who dont currently know them to come on his acc and see his past? nick also still has posts w madi but he was also closer w madi so the chances of them still being friends even if Laura is fired is there.

general- Okay so lets talk abt the warehouse. if they cleared out the warehouse for 'new years' then cool right but why? its so random and could have been done any other time. what if they are getting rid of merch because it will be the last ever sold before they quit if they do?.. When they post (mostly matt here) they take it down. If a vid does not stay up no one profits off of it. Their work as in Matt,Nick,and Chris' work only is always in the mix w laura and zstardigital taking their credit as "ours" when its 110% the triplets. what if they are slowly trying to get rid of their yt past to quit?? not to mention chris has also not said a word abt his tt acc? its almost like.. its normal to him? oh and what abt their recent 'disappering' joke tiktok vid. Thats not very funny gangaroo.. no but fr like what if they actually mean it. ik this is insane but im a crazy overthinker.

as in 1/7/24 this is what i have. anything else will be below.

_________________________________________________________

[kurov1864]

Milgram idol au (pt.9)

008 Amane:

WHY IS THERE A CHILD THAT'S HIRED AS AN IDOL????????????????

Okay anyways. She's not active.

Not officially on hiatus, but she doesn't show up a lot. New Milgram fans get very confused when veterans mentions her because they have never once saw her face.

Only in the debut MV, and maybe in one of the Milgram girls subunit songs. She's busy with school ok. Leave her alone.

Ngl it'll be kinda funny if she acts really differently on and off camera. On camera, she's this super calm, determined, bright and cool idol. Off camera she's this smug smartass who sasses the other idols and literally roasts them for lunch.

Amane still gets included in official, official merch though.

She's very active on social media to make up for the lack of appearances. I would think that most of her current fans would find her account through the initial debut link, then get jumpscared when she actually replies to their comments.

Not as well-known or popular as the other idols, so this allows her to sorta act more personal-like? Basically, she acts like a small streamer. Replying to (almost) every comment, being very active on retweeting fanworks, etc. She's grateful and appreciative for any fans that she has, especially since she understands that it's quite unfair to them

Real fans know that she isn't the cool angel she makes herself out to be. Sorry Amane, but your dry messages on Twitter is NAWT fooling anyone.

Feels like there would be an "inner circle" for her fans, where she actually makes fun of them. In turn, they make sure to repay the favor.

Supporting vocalist. Amane's voice would be light, wispy and airy, just like a fairy. But it can very quickly become intense and passionate. Despite her quote un quote, "cool beauty" image (ignoring the fact that this image is usually reserved for cough OLDER cough members), she has a certain fire burning inside her that she cannot hide, no matter how much she chooses to ignore.

I don't think Amane is as close to the other idols due to a) not living with them, and b) not spending time with them

Notable relationships would be a sibling-like bond with Fuuta (meaning he mocks her for being 12 and she mocks him for being a "redhead"), one-sided child-parent duo with Shidou (Shidou swore he heard Amane hiss when he tried to pet her head after filming the debut MV), cordial mentorship with Kotoko (Amane lowkey looks up to her, despite in her own words "being a closeted furry"), and "strictly business" relationship with Es (they send passive aggressive looks towards each other and speak more corporate than Mikoto)

[v1trum]

Always loved adrenaline rushes but it just got more intense when i went an hour and a half no pain meds with 6 broken bones and i literally did not care cus i couldn't feel anything unless i touched it. "I think my arm is broken" and then i pointed at the one part of my arm that WASNT broken 💀

Walking on a broken ankle casually is lowkey crazy and i love being able to say I've done that. I feel so cool when in reality it was the adrenaline making me feel so fucking high

That shit was just as mind fogging at the fucking KETAMINE they put me on later to work on my arm while i was awake (didn't rly work on the pain btw i was tripping balls while shit still hurt like hell ❤️)

Its actually funny tho cus i was in a pediatric hospital so there was a giant mickey mouse painting on the wall that i was staring at like my savior or some shit . He was doing flips (not actually but he looked REALLY weird for no reason)

My dad was watching them do it all from outside of the room and fr said "that looked painful" when he walked back in NO SHIT 😭 THEY LITERALLY TWISTED AROUND MY FRESHLY BROKEN ARM AND ACTED LIKE MAKING MICKEY ON THE WALL DANCE IN MY VISION WAS STOPPING THE PAIN... LIKE NO.. it numbed it a little but that shit hurt so bad it was literally like being too high to be able to say "hey actually stop the meds aren't doing shit for the pain" while they twist around my bones 😭 i got funny stories out of it tho cus i fr said "IS THAT MY ARM???" like i was SO flabbergasted bc i hadn't seen it lifted all day and didn't know they could get it to do that (they did so very painfully but yk)

Yk it actually felt like such a movie ! 🎀 /Hj

It rly did tho. Cus in movies they always gotta pass out n shit and wake up. I didn't physically pass out but i mentally like fell asleep. I was in shock and had NO clue what was happening

I literally woke up in a smoky car in an extreme amount of un-pin-pointable pain while also not feeling anything. The feeling of my face swelling was crazy tooooo

Bloody face n shit i bet i looked cool as shit before i swelled up like a pumpkin 💀

A random cop comes up and says the car is smoking and we need to get out in case it lights on fire so we did and he brought me to the passenger of his car bc i was clearly distraught as FUCK and was NAWT gonna be able to stand straight up 💀

Yk its actually crazy cus i was in that car for 10 minutes but it fully felt like 1 minute at MOST. Also several weeks or months after it happened i remembered how i was sitting in his car and i pulled down the sun blocker mirror thingy and just stared at myself like wow okay am i gonna die or smthn god damn my entire face is swollen and im bleeding a ton holy hell

Also the other day a tiktok made me remember another thing from it but then i forgot again um. Yk!!!

Make that three what the hell (I'm probably not done)

[tradetobest]

ahh sorry back again bc i can't help myself... this is all too good...

the idea of willy playing like. distant wingman for mitch is so funny. i can only imagine what their text convos look like, just strings of updates of "auston just walked past but he's going to the gym... i think i heard kniesy looking for you earlier, you should find him" and "you should have seen him today, you would have thought i told him i was kicking puppies when i said you called in" and mitch trying sooo hard to be normal about it bc how do you even approach any of that!!! also, do you have any more willy hcs!! i love the idea of him being so giggly at the front desk <3

i'm literally obsessed w little server trio cc/jh/tz... like i know the three of them will get caught up in some gossip and forget they're working just to get irrationally annoyed when someone asks them for help like they're not At work... jh and tz doing the whole "i'll do it if you do it" ruse about their men and then neither of them ever end up actually doing anything, because that would be too easy... (also, i kinda need jamie angsting over how cute he thinks his server is but also knowing better than to hit on someone who's working and can't say no so he's just pining from afar. not like he'd know what to say to ask him out anyway, but!!) any time jamie comes in tz has automatic dibs on his table, even if he's on the other side of the clubhouse from the section trevor is meant to be managing...

your little woller doodle has me in knots i... his smile is SO cute i can't get over him. best kids club staff member who has ever existed...

please keep coming back i am LOVING this

as for more willy hcs hmm…. willy To Me is like. everyone describes him as the most Cool Likeable Chill guy ever but those subway commercials have him being such a goof so i think the combination of Fun and Chill vibes has him at the front desk most of the time, where he Will charm your wife and he Will also charm you, and where he is also privvy to Literally Everything that goes on. want to know some course drama? ask willy. want to know the relationship status of those two guys who always come to the course together? willy will know it.

also. idk but like. willy has the vibe of someone who would bring a sticker sheet to work and just give a kid a lil sticker once in a while when hes in a good mood. idk. i think thats cute i feel like it would be Fun Chill Willy Vibes to do……

followup i think he also can just Get Away with stuff at work bcs the old course boss just let him do shit and the new one cant stop him. Free Roaming Employee Willy Nylander.

i tried for So Long to draw lil gossip circle cc/jh/tz but it was just Nawt coming out i am SO sorry BUT oh my god the jamie wanting to not hit on trevor at work is so real. jamie just sitting there like Don't Hit On Him. He's Working. That's A Bad Power Dynamic. and trevor is like. *auston matthews lean* heyyyy to him ALL THE TIME just like praying jamie will do something to let him know he's interested....

also trevor like letting the host know to always seat jamie in his section and he WILL sprint across the restaurant to serve him. jamie just watching z RUN towards him. so funny.

THANK U woller was so fun to draw,,, he fr is the best kids club staff

[f14fun]

pixelated love (!simmer x mv1) - chapter 7

synopsis: in which the famous three time world champion max verstappen wants to learn how to play the sims 4. except, he doesn't really know how to. so what does he do, search up a youtube tutorial. low-and-behold, y/n's video is the first he watches.

smau ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ profile | masterlist ⋆.˚✮🎧✮˚.⋆ prev | next | series index ˚୨୧⋆｡

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yourusername posted on her story

yourusername: GUESS WHO'S SEEING HER SUGAR DADDY 😈🌹❤️😏✈️

story replies:

maxverstappen1: Not funny. 😡

yourusername: your sugar baby awaits u 🤤🤤

yourusername: get ready to have a clean apartment 🤑

maxverstappen1: I could use the extra cooking and cleaning help... as well as help with the cats...

yourusername: gotcha babyboy 💦💦💸😇

maxverstappen1: Currently booking you a flight back HOME ticket...

landonorris: Ayeeee get that bag sis 🤑💸🍑😉

yourusername: LMFAO LANDO GTFO

landonorris: Make sure you get that bag and ur kitty purrs too 😈

yourusername: BYE WHO TF STOLE UR PHONE 😭😭

landonorris: If he can make you laugh and giggle, he can make that ass shake and jigg-

yourusername: lando i'm going to BLAWK u 😭

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yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 239,761 others

yourusername: i hope pookie wookie bear has been enjoying time with me as i flex on the haters in my super duper uber-cool outfits (pls like it up, i think i spent like hours on pinterest and in my wardrobe coordinating possible outfits 😭😭💸)

view comments:

user1: ZOOWEEMAMA

user2: ALRIGHTTTT an aesthetic kween 🌟🌟

maxverstappen1: I think that your outfits look very super cool! 👍🏻👍🏻

maxverstappen1: I really like your outfits...

maxverstappen1: You look very pretty, schatze ❤️

yourusername: 🥰❤️

user2: GOODNIGHT LMFAO the boyfriend style commenting has me in tears 😭😭😭

user2: alright walk him like a dog sis walk him like a dog 🐶🐶🐶

user3: y'all forget that y/n actually has a bachelors and masters in data science and video game design... she is actually a woman in STEM who is RICHHHH but acts broke when she plays her silly little video games

user4: WAIT FRRR??? mother has BANK?

user5: yeah wait, literally people need to know more but she basically streams on the SIDE.... like she actually works for EA and SIMS 4 FOR REAL

user5: playing the game, testing shit, that is literally part of her job description

user5: y'all have been subject to this SCHEME i've known ab for years, actually!!

user6: BYE HOW LONG HAS SHE FOOLED US LIKE THIS???

user5: welp she's like 25 now... and she graduated with her masters at like age 21... so it's been six years since her job with ea LMFAO

user5: get PUNKED 🫵🏻

user7: bye so she wasn't lying when she said that she has a collection of dior bags... miss ma'am doesn't even NEED max's bag... she has her OWN

yourusername: LOUD. INCORRECT. BUZZER.

yourusername: i actually still do need max's bag as part of my MASTER PLAN for WORLD DOMINATION HAHAHAHA 😈😈😈

maxverstappen1: So I'm basically just a stepping stool.

yourusername: glad that you see your true worth babe 😘😘😘

georgerussell63: Get wrecked 🤣🤣🤣

maxverstappen1: STFU

user8: speaking as someone who literally SAW them roaming the streets of monaco irl... i'm telling you they actually might be a couple fr fr

user8: like he was always holding her bags, her clothes, just basically all of her shit 🤡🤡🤡

user8: and like i literally saw them at a hella expensive private club i know for a FACT that it's hella hard to get into last minute... especially on a week's notice oml 💸😇🌟

user8: bro and yesterday i literally saw them at DIOR and this man wanted to buy her BAGS ON BAGSSSS fr. ofc our rich mother refused but i SWEAR this man secretly bought her one or smth cuz he was eyeing them with sm intent 🤑🤑

user8: AND I DIDN'T INTENTIONALLY STALK THEM, MONACO IS JUST HELLA SMALL APARENTLY CUZ I KEPT SEEING THEM EVERYWHERE 😭😭😭

user9: are we nawt gonna talk ab how last slide miss ma'am is literally parading around with the ACTUAL FUCKING RING ON HER FINGER 💍💍💍

user9: zoom in y'all, i beg pls i swear i'm not hallucinating man

user10: WOAH WHAT THE FUCK???

user9: RIGHT???

user11: wait she is fr wearing that bigass ring around everywhere damn...

user9: ON HER RING FINGER NONTHELESS????

user12: i literally have no fucking idea what is satire and what's real life

user12: this is quite literally the LONGEST someone has still managed to keep me in the dark yet very much still providing me with sm information

user12: i feel bloody PUNKED 🤡😡

user13: wait ur so real LMFAO 😖😖

user13: maybe like the whole wedding bit is fake... but those emerging feels coming from BOTH of them seem VERY MUCH REAL

user14: ^^ such a good point 😉

user15: guys i don't mean to hyperfixiate (that is the last time i'll say that LMAO) but isn't the last slide a bit too close for "just friends" who happened to meet online first and irl just a few days ago?

user15: BYE ik we can't see it but we KNOW SHE IS DEFFO ON TOP OF HIMMMM 🤣🤣

yourusername: i have that top-dominant-alpha energy no matter where i am 😈👹👺🐺🐺🐺

user16: oh!-

maxverstappen1: Spending time with you felt very Spring Breakers Core!!!

user17: BROOOO Y/N HOW HAVE YOU GIRLIPOP-IFIED THIS MAN SO FAR???? 😭😭😭

yourusername: ughhh so true max...

yourusername: just wish we paraded around monaco in a big big pink truck

maxverstappen1: Well... there's always a next time for everything 🤭🤭🤭

user18: WHAT DO Y'ALL KNOW THAT I DON'T

user18: i hate hate HATE being left in the dark y'all 😭

user18: what in the fomo am i experiencing....

user18: this feels like gatekeeping 🧍🏽‍♀️

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taglist: @hiireadstuff @sinofwriting @mehrmonga @the-untamed-soul @glai1023-blog @loloekie @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @sheastri @llando4norris @gwginnyweasley @carmenita122 @ririyulife @pausmoon @ur-fav-ave @eveninggstar @maddie-naps @erin-odonnell04 @rexit-mo @ems-alexandra @si1ver06 @iamred-iamyellow @bibissparkles @percypie @formula1blog @lanadelray1989 @rylieverstappen-sargent @luvsforme @eiaaasamantha @kaysmiles42 @mvaldez7821 @stinkyjax @sweate-r-weathe-r @laneyspaulding19 @mingyusbigrighttoe

some of these didn't get tagged, and i'm having trouble (?) it's being very weird, idk, so please let me know if your name is here and it didn't tag you ❣️

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author's note: ty guys for reading this fic! 😍🫶🏾

god the last twts made me chuckle a bit... n e ways, lemme know what form of media y'all want to see more of (i.e. twts, insta posts, insta stories, txt messages... i just want to gauge the audience opinion, yk?!)

also since we r getting into the nitty gritty detail of the romance aspect, i was wondering if y'all would want to see some prose/writing... rather than just a smau, b/c it's really hard to illustrate romance without all the creepy-ass paparazzi shots 😭😭

i'm also finally back from vaca! i'm still deciding if i want next chap or chap 9 to be the final chapter, stay tuned!

i'm also still a little behind on the taglist (like a few chapters), so if you didn't get tagged, PLEASE please please write your @ below, i'm so sorry y'all😭

comment if you want to be added to the taglist! ⋆.˚✮🎧✮˚.⋆

[sodrippy]

hii it's op anon, i'm at the start of marineford rn :3, where are you? how are you liking it?

sabaody was fun, i love that the strawhats are all enablers to each other, so slay, they should've gotten to wreak more havoc against the celestial dragons

impel down was great! i loved the wacky hijinks and seeing all the little villains return + jinbei seems cool!

i miss my friends thooo this isn't fun anymore :c and i know what's gonna happen soon and am NOT looking forward to seeing that

but roger babytrapping his two biggest rivals is sooo funny to me (ik it's not technically baby trapping but it's funnier to say)

ooh also are there any new characters you really like? c:

HIII ough god marineford................godspeed dude!

saboady and impel down were so fun i really enjoyed both of them! it was great to have some idiocy moments w buggy back and stuff, and yeah exactly the carousel of returning character cameos and everything was neat! saboady was just SO good and i thought the last fight w the pacifistas and kizaru and all were really good like the tension was so high in them even though i knew ultimately where everyone ended up yknow?

no same god i felt the exact same way going into marineford like. i know whats going to happen AND i dont even get to see any of the besties for emotional support?? but we soldier on !

BABYTRAPPING HELP thats so fucking funny yeah youre right its way better to phrase it like that. i loved the flashbacks soooo much like they are so cute and silly and brothers<3 ace really fully tried to kill baby luffy though it made me laugh so much like. he does nawt want you around bud, sorry!

i just finished up dressrosa, which i also really enjoyed! it drags a little towards the end for me but overall i found it really interesting and fun, maybe just bc the setting was quite cool. faves from that arc are viola and corazon i wish we got to see even more of them but obviously the arc isnt about them + theres a lot of random guys introduced in dressrosa in a sort of similar Assortment way as impel down which was exciting, like bartolomeo and cavendish who are just so fucking funny i really really enjoyed them too.

fave 'new' characters are ofc sabo and law. im such a sucker for like, 'disillusioned guy who has a shit family runs away to become a feral dude w a good heart' sort of stories so sabo is my bestie forever. also, lead pipe<3

laws abilities are soooo cool am obsessed w him + the way he is so smart and has really well laid plans...except then luffy happens is so so funny. sorry you are losing everything so badly all the time buddy</3 im really glad hes sticking around i hope he gets to have a win someday...

actually insane to think about how fast everythings moving post-ts i didnt realise it was all SO quick. like from the vague things i knew it seemed like soooo much stuff happens in terms of plot and each arc getting longer that i assumed it took a little while in the story timeline as well but thats not the case at all. i know in general the 'timeline' is very unspecific and fluid (like even just thinking about how the entire pre-ts story takes place over probably less than six months ???? is crazy to me) but i definitely feel like oh shit ok everything is just at hyperspeed now bc its all so Serious, alright !

[angered-box]

[raises hand] i would like to know…about the lads…….

okay so like i'm not gonna try and talk about TOO many but there are a small handful that i can talk about cause i’ve introduced them on here already!! uhhh some are. ocs inserted into canon. because i’m silly :3

I GOT A LITTLE CARRIED AWAY ERM.... and also got embarrassed near the end so i tried hurrying up the last section....

Okok so uhmmm there are some of my oldest ocs i’ve had which would be Wren and Una (and also Xavier but i haven’t drawn him yet so erm.) so like. Their whole story is, ahhh difficult for the most part cause it was created 5 years ago and i was god awful at stories and i’m still trying to fix it so in a summary Wren has adoption papers thrown at him for Una at the ripe old age of 17 because he did not feel right seeing the child of the man he was friends with and saw as a father figure get sacrificed (even if it will help the town not go to shit) because he felt like he needed to atleast give back to the man since he passed. But he takes Una and because of the fact that the town could not kill her the town slowly starts decaying which is kinda fucked up honestly if you think about it. And it’s not like the town can pick someone else it’s kinda predetermined every ten years thanks to the horrific beast that has cursed the town it’s a lil silly👍. But because of that they’re kinda constantly being followed because the town people desperately need Una. So it’s kinda like that for about 5-6 years, Wren is now like 22-23 and Unas about 8 cool? Cool. And for Xavier it’s a lil difficult but he kinda helps them out around that time by taking them in cause he was returning back home to visit his mother (who is very much on her death bed at that point) That's like the most i have for their story i don't have an ending but it gets grim kinda and Xavier is the only human out of the trio that's fun he's also like 25. i don't know what Wren is supposed to be he's just blue, and Una is like half human half sheep demon, i’ve tried to make her appearance like a highland sheep but it's not going so well as of right now lol….

Agh and there’s also my minecraft oc. His name is Box because i did nawt want to come up with a name for him so i just call him that cuz my user on minecraft is the same as here lol… but the funny thing is for him with my silliness he’s basically a retired god. And also a deadbeat parent. Both to his bio children and also like his actual creations he made by his own hands. He stopped being a god because he literally got bored and wanted to travel. He is so avoidant with things and only cares about traveling and tea he’s awful and i love him also he’s old. Really old. And also has fox ears and a fox tail. Did i mention he’s old.

There’s also my dnd character!!!! His name is Ilias and i don’t have a basis of actual lore for him but i loveeeee talking about him. He’s a wood elf who is honestly looks like a sick young tree (he’s like 203 cm tall). You know that image of Charlie from Always Sunny. The pepe silvia scene? That’s his personality kinda but in a more academic way. He is not normal about knowledge, but when is a wizard normal about that shit like actually. He manages to somehow not get insta killed despite having 14 AC and 14 hitpoints…for now atleast. Also he can use infestation, and basically mite blasts people which is really funny. He also manages to get sick about things a lot, don’t let him in a cramped vehicle of any sorts.

Okay so now we have ocs that i have tossed into games cause it’s funny. So there are two characters who are actually siblings, fraternal twins actually! Uh their names are Kisho and Kuran and both of them are for two different games (Kisho is meant for o.bey me and Kuran is for t.wst but this is not about the games i’m about to infodump their lore because holy shit did i fuck things up for them) So the funny thing is for them while they’re twins Kuran is the youngest because he was born like a few minutes after midnight L. so both of them are capable of magic erm both parents are witches ( i actually intend to draw them soon!) and also like the healthiest bio parents i have ever created it’s so crazy (they almost blew eachother up multiple times as teens because they wanted to practice together <3) the difference is Kisho is actually better though because he stuck with his studies and Kuran kinda is just a “fuck it we ball” type person for magic. Oh also did i mention how they’re twins and Kuran is just a day younger? Yea well i lied. So they WERE the same age until they were 11. In which then Kisho had got pissed off at Kuran and ran off to go hide from him to calm down and uh. He kinda got sent to the dimension. By all means he was missing for like 3 days but when they found him he had aged by 3 years. Oh and also he experienced The Horrors and is never going to be the same again and now instead of them being siblings who did a lot together and managed to be on the save wavelength they’re now so vastly different because of Kishos experiences and also the fact he is very much no longer in the same state of mind. Anyways Kisho is like 20-21 and is currently working on becoming a historian and philologist whereas Kuran is like 17-18 going into fashion design. They have issues and it’s honestly really bad but one just puts everything in a cupboard and quickly closes the door before everything falls and the other pretends that his issues aren’t there. Also Kisho is transmasc YAYYYYY YAYYYYYYYYYYY. (Also because i’ve made art of them before i’ll give a description cause Kisho has green hair whereas Kuran is blonde :3)

(i started skipping A LOT of major things about this character due to getting embarrassed and scared of talking too much but i’m going to show more in the future)

Uh and last one i can kinda talk about would be Akihisa…. Where to start erm… so he’s my silly little rabbit and i torment him. He has the most issues while also like the least. First off he doesn’t live with his biological parents he was adopted ^-^ so like….. essentially . hmmm. Okay so essentially his father came from outside of Japan when he was a bit younger to pursue filming (which he didn’t stick around in but it’s okay) and he met Akihisas mother who was (and still is) a model. So their relationship did not work out but hey they have a kid now. The kid doesn’t have a mother whose permanently in his life and the father is kinda. Yeag. ANYWAYS so the fun thing is his dad was able to get help from his college friend to look after Akihisa because he had to leave (i’m sorry i’m lazy right now and don’t want to give the actual explanation) and this is when the Komatsu family comes in because they basically adopt him. So this family consists of Mrs Komatsu who is Akihisas fathers friend and she’s an actress who mostly just does smaller roles but anyways there’s also her husband who is a literature professor at a local college and then the siblings are Toshiko (eldest), who works as a model agent, and Ikuya (youngest but now middle child) whose actually in a unit (it’s more so an actual band he’s not a idol but you know what i mean) and is the reason why Akihisa wanted to become an idol in the first place. Also when he first went to yumenosaki for the first like two years he had dyed hair, specifically black hair because he didn’t like standing out from his family. ALSO in !! he’s a graduate just a fair. Information. He also was the leader of his ex-unit and it has the worst fucking name you could have everrrrr named something. It was literally called THE ODYSSEY… and also he was like not prepared to be a leader he let his unitmates walk all over him until the very end when the group split. Also one of the unitmates in that group became the leader of the current unit he’s in and it’s obviously a lot more functional now.

 I’m starting to get tired i’ve been writing this document for 3 days and just spent atleast 3-4 hours writing the rest of this. This is like. The bare minimum of a summary for all my ocs and i am so sorry for that…

[borisbubbles]

Eurovision (#34)

34. BELGIUM Jérémie Makiese - “Miss you” 19th place

Decade rank: 69/79 [Above Efendi, below Undisclosed]

Lol remember that scene from Borat where Sasha Baron Cohen attempts to kidnap Pamela Anderson and yells “PAMELA I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!! NAWT!!!!! 😭” while being carried away by her bodyguards? That has always been the first thing I think about whenever I hear "Miss you”. 

Given how anonymous “Miss you” is, it’s almost impressive that it foremost manages to be really fucking annoying to me. Moreover, its brand of “annoying” has *layers*, like a trifle of tepid tedium.

At the core of this Ennui Onion we have the insipid attempt to tell an “I’M FINE I’M FINE I’M FIIIIIIIIIIINE” post-break up storyline through inane “well sometimes i feel sad, but other times I feel just fine I guess 🤷‍♀️” verses. Is Jérémie over this break-up and just pretending to be sad because that’s what’s expected of him, or is he deeply disturbed and Playing It Cool For Appearances? The answer to that is “five televote points, find someone who cares”.

Belgium then further doubled down on their irritatingly pointless story of "Jérémie is fine except for when he isn’t” by making his song pointlessly irritating. Oh WHOA, a Bond Theme opening from Belgium? No way?! A clumsy and forced RnB transition to simulate emotional growth where there is none? So novel! How do we improve that? Why, by sprinkling in some next-level screaming, of course!

The FUCKING screaming oh Qod that’s the worst bit of it all. You have singing, then the vocal show-offery that Anja Nissen and Sheldon Riley are infamous for (but again, belting is FINE, just don’t make it... your main stratagem); and right at the bottom there’s Jérémie squealing fucking NOT-jokes, complete with Unfortunate Singing Face, yes, let’s not ignore the main televote killer in this equation. Jérémie’s emotional range is as hot or cold according to what the shitty narrative requires it to be, which is not how real people emote!  Whoever came up with this song as much understanding of natural progression as Michael Ben David has of consent.

So, it’s almost funny that the entire narrative I just described got fucking nixed in the live staging which chose to solely (SOLELY!) focus on the rhythm instead? I mean, I approve, cuz Melody > Message AND the dancers were pretty talented, but that makes the whole song feel even more pointless and irritating. Why even have this at all! Why not just make a fun RnB song instead that actually COULD have gotten a few more televotes? Gaaaaaaghfgiigfrger!g!

Also, the ballad portion of the song was staged well, and then dancers come on and so do the copious wideshots. Is this yet another example of Belgian staging falling apart due to shitty music or another example of RAI’s fucking incompetence, take your pick. Still, Why doesn’t Jérémie dance along more vibrantly? Why doesn’t he dance along, PERIOD? What’s the point of adding some kick-ass krumping if you’re not going ot use it efficiently? Did Eliot and Sennek really die so Belgium could NOT learn from their past mistakes?!?

All of this amounts to ::checks wiki:: 19th place, a second bottom five televote result with the audience in a row, and a generic Voice Winner’s First Radio Hit, that will also be his only hit ever. I hope you’ve enjoyed by this irritatingly long write-up about this pointless fucking song!

THE RANKING

34. BELGIUM - Jérémie Makiese - “Miss you” 35. NORWAY - Subwoolfer - “Give that wolf a banana” 36. AUSTRALIA - Sheldon Riley - “Not the same” 37. SWITZERLAND - Marius Bear - “Boys do cry” 38. AZERBAIJAN - Nadir Rustamli - “Fade to black” 39. ITALY - Mahmood & Blanco - “Brividi” 40. ISRAEL - Michael Ben David - “I.M”

Lol we advance into the yellow tier with a live that was somehow worse than Omaga’s <3   What a great year. 

[harryfeatgaga]

This is very random and a very long story but seeing the incessant harrassment of Harry's gf & her being so unbothered just reminds me so much of the nonsense I dealt with in high school and I wanted to share 😅 So I'm from a very small town and like we had all gone to school together since kindergarten so when someone knew came in it was always a mad dash to snag them and everyone became so obsessed. So my freshman year of high school there was this guy named Jacob who moved to our school and everyone thought he was sooooo hot and cool and when I tell you girls were doing THE MOST to get his attention. It was actually so embarrassing it was literally like the bachelor or something like he would take a different girl on a date every day and all of the popular girls would post about their dates and it was just 💀💀💀 so anyways it was like the talk of the school like everyone betting on who he was gonna pick and I was like NAWT cool in high school I was like one of the gifted kids who did quiz bowl and shit so I was kinda ignoring the whole thing bc I wasn't in the running but he friend requested & messaged me on Facebook one day and I didn't get attention from guys at 14 so I was like 😳 and ofc messaged back and we talked and stuff and long story short he eventually asked for my number and we started hanging out and ended up dating. And when people found out...LORD. I had girls trying to fight me left right and center. People I had never spoken one word to posting shit about me online, starting rumors, cyberbullying me, harassing me at school, messaging my mom on fb to tell her things about me that weren't true, etc! But I literally found the whole thing so funny and was just like hehehe y'all are just jealous bc I got the man y'all were after without even trying 🤭 you couldn't tell me anything, I was on top of the world! And we actually ended up dating for like 4 years lmao and only broke up bc we went to different colleges and couldn't make the long-distance thing work. So anyways this was a roundabout way to say that this is what they remind me of 😐 and it's just funny bc like they're literally a bunch of high school bullies who think if they're mean enough, the person will break and do what they want but like why tf would she care what a bunch of jobless losers on the internet have to say about her when she's got him like get real babe!!!

PLEASE HELP ME ALL OF THAT OVER A HIGH SCHOOL BOY IM CRYIJGNJIGNBHJGIKV MY GAWD PEOPLE ARE NUTZZZZZZ

[sweatpeeee]

Love potion AU (part2)

yo yo yo yo yooooooooo

wassup guys, I FINALLY have part 2 ready!!!!! It only took me forever. but yeah! I hope you guys enjoy! Thanks for all the love and support btw! thank you so much for 114 followers!!! genuinely so amazing! anyways with no further adieu, her is part 2 (hey that rhymed lmao)

Warnings: swearing, passing out, Peter being petty, Brad being concerned. and i think that’s it! LMK if I missed anything! :)

  It seemed the peter couldn’t suppress the giddy smile on his face, the boy basically skipping down the hallway with a tiny glass vial closed off with corkscrew twirling between his fingers. The substance glowed blue, but only when it was stirred did the liquid radiate. Peter felt his heart race at the thought of having MJ in his arms finally noticing and loving him the way he’s always dreamed. He imagined walking down the hall with his hand in Michelles as she leaned her on his shoulder, Peter’s ears burned red at these intrusive innocent thoughts that crossed his mind. His pace was fast to his locker, too excited at the power that the little container held. 

“What is that?” Peter felt his soul leave his body at the sudden question from his best friend who was breathing down his neck. Peter spun around gasping and clutching his chest.

“Ah! Ned! What the Hell?!?” Slowly feeling his body untense, his breathing still rapid. 

“What is that” Ned asked again nonchalantly as if he didn’t almost give his best friend a heart attack. 

“Oh, uh… it’s- you know... it’s web fluid-” Of course, Peter’s best friend knew he was lying-not mentioning that peter’s voice goes up six octaves when he lies. 

“You seem to forget that I am your best friend and that I have actually seen what your web fluid really looks like.” The boy with a bucket hat lifted up his brow unamused. 

“God, Fine I’ll tell you- but you have to promise me you wont get mad at me or tell anyone.” Peter whispered while leaning towards his friend. Ned leaned closer too, slightly giddy. 

“It’s a love potion-” The boy mutters, Ned shoots his head up, beyond shocked. 

“ No, No, no, no. I am NAWT letting you do that- nope-” The outburst caused many students to cast their gaze at the two boys, muttering a few insults that the bucket hat boy didn’t seem to pay attention to. 

“Ned, would you shut up??? Just listen-” Peters hands were waving around trying to get his friend to quiet down, “And you promised you wouldn’t get mad!-” 

“No! I am mad!  Because it’s about time I tell you how INSANE you sound!-” Ned began to whisper aggressively with teeth clenched shut, “I mean you cannot be serious! That's genuinely horrible, Peter and I’m deadass disappointed in you-” 

“What’s horrible?” The sudden quiet and soft voice broke their bickering- both boys froze with wide eyes and turned  towards you. Your books clutched to your chest, your fingers picking at your already damaged binder.

“Y/n! Hey! Uh… when did you get here?” Peter’s hand whipped behind his back to hide the substance that would help with his goal to win over a girls heart. 

“Um.. A few minutes ago- what were you guys talking about?” You sensed they were hiding something but couldn’t quite put your finger on it. You simply gave them a confused glance. Ned’s smile was strained but sweet nonetheless, peter sweating buckets next to him. 

“N-Nothing! Nope, nothing at all- just how… uh,” Ned glanced at Peter for any sort of help, the brunette shrugged helplessly, “Just how- how dumb-” Ned lands a pinch to Peter’s forearm- resulting in a wince and yelp from the boy, “-Peter is for not consulting with us about a…. OH- A movie night without us!” Ned grumbled between his clenched yet smiling state, “Right Pete?”

“Y-Yeah! Of course! Caught me ha ha… um yeah I just wanted to surprise you guys- you know what they say…. Surprises never come often!” He clears his throat… His palm sweaty from your perplexed gaze. 

“God, I forget how absolutely weird you guys are. Whatever- uh movie sounds great but I think I won't be able to make it-” You began backing up to head to your first period, unwilling to be around the boy you swooned over. It’s probably best you stayed away to avoid heartbreak. Plus, he was most likely going to invite MJ and you weren’t in the mood to see your crush drool over your best friend, that was until a figure placed their arm around your shoulders. 

“I think she means she can’t wait to have a movie night!” Speak of the devil. MJ dragged you back to the two boys who were still trying to act casual. 

“MJ, please- I really-” You muttered until the curly haired girl cut you off, 

“No, y/n- you can’t bail and expect things to stop being difficult- come on.” She muttered back, “so who’s house?” she smirked. You glanced at Peter, already becoming a flushed mess, his mouth tripping over his own tongue. 

“W-we can go to- to uh- to mine… if you guys want..-” You would’ve thought that stutter was adorable if only the reason wasn’t for your best friend's presence that was making him blush. 

“Cool. 8pm, no later.” and with that, she spins around and heads to class right as the bell rings.    

Y/n felt uneasy the rest of the day- feeling her stomach drop at the sheer thought of going to the movie night just to watch Peter drool over her best friend. 

As the final bell of the day rang, y/n gathered her things and headed to her locker in a hurry- in hopes to avoid her group of friends. She shuts her locker and spins towards the exit, only to run into someone- felt like a brick wall honestly. Looking up to meet the tall figures' eyes to apologize, your eyes widen. 

“Hey, Y/n!” The boy smirked looking down at you, showing his bright clean teeth.

“Oh, Brad- I’m so sorry I wasn’t even aware-”

“No! You’re all good! It was my fault I should’ve warned you or something-” Brad laughed, his eyes crinkling on the edges. You had to admit that Brad was very attractive. He has a strong build and was very kind, he always seemed to be very happy to be around you. Lately Brad has been hanging out with you during lunch or in between classes, He even offered to become your year long chemistry partner. You would even go as far as consider Brad a friend. 

“Well, sorry anyway” You looked down at your shoes before forcing yourself to look up at your eyes, “uh, how can I help you?” You couldn’t help but blush at his intense gaze. 

“Well, I swear I had it at the tip of my tongue but I seemed…” He smirked as he leaned his hand on the locker next to your head- you felt yourself shrink under him, “- to get lost in those beautiful y/e/c eyes of yours. I must’ve forgotten what I was trying to tell you.” your cheeks and ears burned red. 

“Oh god- Brad stop that-” You giggled as you ducked under his arm to walk towards the school doors. Brad followed with an easy strut, of course it didn’t take much to catch up to you- The dude was tall as hell. 

Brad let out a hearty laugh, now walking next to you, “now, you know I’m just teasing you y/n- I love the way you get all hot and bothered when I compliment you.” You just shook your head with a grin adorning your features, “Hey, is it ok if I walk you home?” You look up at the kind boy, happy at the idea that at least someone wants to be around you voluntarily.

“I mean-” right then you feel an arm drape over my shoulder and interrupt your conversation. 

“Hey, Brad! How’s it going dude,” MJ lets go of you for a second and gives him a bro hug. 

“Hey MJ, it’s going pretty good- Just chatting with this cutie. Wondering if I could walk her home today.” He flashed you a grin accompanied with a wink. Your face hot as you avoided MJ’s growing smirk. 

“Hey, you can walk with us- were all having a movie night at Peter’s if you want to come along?” Brad’s face seemed to light up at the suggestion, 

“Woah, hey seriously? That’d be awesome! Well, if it’s cool with you guys? You sure Peter won’t mind?” his brows furrowed in worry. 

“Of course not! Pete’s a chill dude, he won’t care at all.” 

----

“Can someone explain to me why the hell Brad Davis is walking behind us with our y/n?” Peter couldn’t keep the venomous words from leaving his mouth the second they were far enough from the pair behind them. 

MJ chuckled at his frustration as Ned watched with curious eyes as to why his friend was so pressed. 

“Would you relax, he just wants to be near Y/n because he likes her.” MJ bumps Peter in the shoulder with her own, making him stumble a bit with a grunt. 

“Ok but why y/n?” He mumbles

“Woah-” Ned gasps in shock to Peter’s words

“No, no- I didn’t mean-” 

“Peter, you have no right saying what y/n can and cannot do and in who she talks to.” MJ could’ve caused physical pain to that boy with the glare she was giving him. Peter grumbled to himself- knowing his crush was right. The thought of y/n and Brad flirting didn’t sit well with him. 

“Wait- so Brad is having a movie night with us?” Ned peered behind them to see Brad poking his finger towards y/n’s side making her burst in giggles and attempt to push Brad's fingers away.

“No” 

“Yes” 

 MJ and Peter share a glance. The curly haired brunette squints, “what was that, Peter?” Challenging him to repeat his statement. 

“God, fine.” It comes out as a Scoff. He just wanted to get home so he could set his plan in motion. He could already tell MJ was beginning to grow annoyed with him already. 

——

“Shh- Brad, you c-can’t say stuff like that!” Your sweet laughter started to get on Peter’s nerves. His knuckles white as he unlocks the door and pushes in. 

What the hell is so funny? Of course this plan is going to be ruined with them constantly giggling and flirting- 

“Yo- Pete! Is it chill if I use your bathroom?” Brad's voice reaches Peter as he slings his backpack next to the door, just the thought of Brad staying at his apartment, eating his snacks and flirting with his y/n- he stops himself, he must be getting too protective over his friends. 

“It’s fine-“ he mutters before hearing a door close in the direction of his bathroom, Peter crouches to the movie cabinet, scanning every CD for hopefully a star wars movie, “finally some peace and quiet around here-“ 

“You ok Pete?” Your soft voice startled him- his head spins to his right- meeting your soft gaze. 

“Y-yeah it’s all good.” Hoping she didn’t hear his relief of Brad's absence. 

“Are you sure? You seem really tense,” Peter couldn’t find an excuse, looking around for one until his eyes landed on MJ laughing about something with Ned. Y/n noticed, “oh… is it because of MJ?” Her mood drained, all that talking with Brad distracted her from why she really didn’t want to go over for movie night. 

MJ…. 

That has to be it- yeah, that’s why he’s irritated. He doesn’t want things to go wrong with MJ. 

He nods slightly. Y/n lips part, words she’s been itching to say about to leave her mouth before- 

“Hey, y/n! Check out this puppy wearing a lion costume!” Brad was holding up his phone in your direction. You glanced back then smiled at Peter and turned towards Brad. You smiled as the video played, a little smiling pout rested on your lips, Brad gazed at you- one would call them heart eyes, Peter would call it disgusting. Brad looked at Peter and winked. 

God this guy is insufferable. 

———-

30 minutes into Back to Future, Peter unwillingly agreed to watch after a stern glare from Ned, and Brad was quite cuddled up to y/n. Peter had no idea why he was acting the way he was, he just didn’t trust Brad to take care of her and treat her right, he seemed like a player to Peter. Peter shook the negative thoughts out of his head before deciding that he should now start setting his plan into motion. 

“Anyone want a drink?” Peter stood, straightening out his jeans. 

“Yeah I’d like one,” Brad nodded, still watching TV, then shifted his eye’s to Y/n, “ What about you, Y/n?” You looked up at Brad and smiled, a small nod. Peter could all but roll his eyes. 

“Ned? MJ?” His eyes silently pleading that his crush says yes. Ned nods, MJ contemplates then shrugs.  

Peter nearly runs to the kitchen, pulling out the glowing vile from his pocket. Setting out 4 cups, pouring in some kool-aid he made earlier in the morning. Slowly he lifts the pitcher, filling 3 cups generously except for the fourth one. He pops open the tube with the chemical, remembering distinctly what Mr. Strange had told him. 

Absolutely no more than 3 drops. Any more than 3 drops and we’ll have some serious problems. Do I make myself clear? 

“Just 3. No more than 3, you got this Peter.” Peter focused intently on the tube, watching as the liquid dripped…

One…

Two…

Thre-

“Yo! Peter! You good with those drinks?” 

Four-five-six….

Peter could’ve screamed. He could’ve ripped his hair out. But there he stood with his jaw on the floor, with a cup full of, not 3 but 6, drops of the enchantment. Brad came strolling in, grabbing the infected drink and a clean one- 

“WAIT BRAD- DONT!” Peter nearly trampled the guy- making Brad jolt and spill some of the drink in his shirt. 

“Jesus Peter! What the hell is your problem??” Brad set the cups down on the small table in the living room with the girls as he made his way to the restroom. 

“What happened?” MJ was about to get out of her seat to check out the noise. 

“N-nothing! Nothing!” Peter peered at his friends, meeting with concerned eyes, ”It’s all good! Brad just uh- he spilled some of the drink on his shirt- Hey Ned I need assistance-“ Peter spoke through his teeth, attempting to reassure the girls. Ned looked around confused as well as the two girls sharing perplexed glances. 

“Code Death Star” he harshly whispered- 

Bed shot up out of his seat and rushed with Peter to the kitchen. 

“What happened???” Ned whispers while he  avoided the puddle of kool aid on the floor. 

“Brad happened! I was just putting in the drops like Mr.Strange told me, then Brad scared me and 6 drops slipped in-“ 

“6 drops?!??” Ned was quickly muted by Peter's hand slapping over his mouth. 

“Shhh keep it down, dude-“ 

Ned rips Peter's hand off, “Dude we have no idea what that could do! What if she pukes for the rest of her life?? What if it does the exact opposite of making her like you?? What if she dies-“ 

“I don’t know what it could do! We just need to make sure that no one touches that drink!” Peter then sees from his peripheral vision, his spider senses going haywire, a Y/n stuck with a grimace on her face. 

A red cup in her hand. 

No… nonononononono- don’t tell me-

“ No offense Peter, but this shits disgusting- tastes like medicine if you ask me.” You gag lightly, “god- it’s got a horrible aftertaste too- I swear you’re out to kill me Peter” you giggle. Walking past them and throwing out the cup. 

Peter found this anything but funny- Neds eyes went wide- absolute shock ran through both of the boys. 

“What? Is there something on my face?” You began rubbing your cheeks and your lips. The boys staying stoic, “guys…?” You began getting worried.

“H-how much did you drink?” Peter's voice is 6 octaves higher, taking slow cautious steps towards you.

“I- I chugged it-“ Peter then grips your wrist and as if the whole world stopped, you could only see Peter. Your feelings increase ten fold. suddenly you feel absolutely dizzy. Your legs tremble at the sheer touch of his hand on your wrist, he’s tugging you towards his room and your head keeps spinning, you place your hand onto the wall for balance before being dragged once again. Your blurry vision sees Brad barely exit the restroom wiping his shirt- then glancing at you- eyebrows furrowed.

You shut your eyes tightly, hoping it helps with your focus, blinking rapidly. Your body grows hot- like you’re running a fever, but your feet and hands are freezing. You can hardly hear anything as Peter's distant voice soothes you, probably telling you to sit on his bed. You started falling into a state of drowsy sleep despite his voice sounding distressed.

 You pass out. 

“Shit! Shit shit shit shit!” Peter was Whimpering and shaking your shoulders, pulling your eyelids open only to see the white of your eyes, iris rolled back, “oh god, please wake up Y/n! I need you awake!” Peter's heart was in absolute anguish, he felt a deep hole in his chest, he couldn’t breath. 

Panic attack. 

Ok, ok fuck- Ohmygod is she dead??? This was a mistake, god what the fuck did I do??? Fuck fuck fuck ok ok you need to calm down- what the hell am I having a panic attack right now??? ok ok 3 things- what can I see? Uh ok ok…. 

Peter glanced down at your unconscious body and started taking deep breaths. 

Ok ok I can see y/n’s…. smooth skin- uh I can… I can- I can see her favorite hair tie, I can see uh… her star wars shirt… ok good ok uh 3 things I can feel- 

He grasped her limp hand. His breaths are already regulating. 

I can feel her hand- a-and her pulse! Oh thank god I can feel her pulse….her bracelet. 

Ok and I can hear her breathing! I can hear cars outside, I can hear the movie from the living room. 

His heart rate goes down significantly. He’s at ease now. Ned barges in, startling Peter. About to speak before his eyes stop dead on an unconscious girl on Peter's bed. 

“Is she dead?!?” 

“No! No she’s ok! She’s just passed out!” Peter couldn’t bring himself to move from you- your hand still grasped tightly in his. He felt absolutely horrible, he’d never forgive himself for this. He only prayed that you woke up soon. 

“What’s going on?'' Brad's voice in the hallway, Peter runs to his door, holding it close to his body to stop Brad from looking inside. 

“Nothing Brad, mind your business-“ 

“No Peter! I don’t know what the fuck your problem is with me, but all I know is that you’re a sketchy little dude with some serious problems- Now I saw y/n and she didn’t look well- let me see her.” Brad attempted pushing open the door but Peter kept his grip on the door. His spider strength came quite in handy. 

“She's fine dude- she wasn’t feeling well so I took her to my room so she could rest!” Brad only glared down at Peter. His deathly stare was nearly intimidating but Peter wouldn’t cave,” I think you should go home.” Peter didn’t even try to hide the venomous tone this time. Brad was really getting on his nerves. 

“You’re up to something. Hiding things. And I’m sure that whatever it is you’re hiding,” Brad nods his head, signaling to you behind Peter, “you don’t want her finding out.” Brad slowly walks backwards, eyes never leaving Peter, “I’m on to you, Parker.” And with that Brad turned around and left the apartment, slamming the door. 

He sighed in relief, turning around to his best friend. 

“So now what?” 

————————————————————

aaaannnnnnnndddddd THAT’S part 2 errybody! Thanks for the love and support and I’ll do my best to get part 3 up sooner! 

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