#hate Jolene tho

[smilesrobotlover]

Gosh I LOVE how soft Linebeck gets towards the end he’s so sweet

[waywardsalt]

before i actually go through the phantom hourglass manga to critique it i’m going to quickly just toss out a bullet point list of things i actually liked in the ph manga

- i like how the stuff w/ tetra in the first chapter not only sets her up but serves to contrast how she is as a captain vs. how linebeck initially is as a captain. the line ‘as captain, nothing is more important than the lives of my crew’ specifically

- link’s cute. hes just a little guy

- i’m a big fan of the added detail that linebeck tends to stick out his bottom lip. it fits really well with his character. as a smaller side note i like the way his nose is drawn. i just like the shape they went with lol

- the bit with the point card for eddo’s garage that is specifically noted to be Not In The Video Game is good

- for all intents and purposes what is done with the bellumbeck fight is really good

thats it everything else i either feel neutral about or hate/feel frustrated with

[azulpitlane]

be aggressive l ln4

lando norris x dcc!reader summary: the internet is curious as to why lando suddenly has an interest in american football, specifically with the dallas cowboys masterlist

f1gossip

13,283 likes

f1gossip Lando Norris and Mclaren CEO, Zak Brown at the Dallas Cowboys game today in the AT&T stadium!!

view all comments

user his ass did not wanna be there😭

user lando?? american football?? huh???

user guys it was sponsored by hilton!! pretty sure thats why they attended

user makes sense cause bro looked miserable by the second half of the game

user a strange strange sight

user mf was bored the whole game except when the cheerleaders performed LMFAO

user the video of him locking in as soon as they stepped out in the field💀 ↪user WHERES THE VIDEO HAHAH? ↪user the video is all over twitter, cameraman did him dirty lmfao

yourusername

liked by landonorris and 12,379 others

yourusername victory sunday💙🤍💙

view all comments

user lesss goooo cowboys

user FAVE DCC

user in y/n we trust🧎‍♀️

user wait a minute- lando what are you doing here?!?

user no cause i noticed that too👀

user obsessed with you

user patiently waiting for the lando girlies to realize he followed her immediately after tonights game

user poor lando didnt get the follow back tho😭😭

yourusername

liked by landonorris and 19,382 others

yourusername first ever grand prix!!! such a delight to perform for these lovely faces✨

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user you guys made paying hundreds of dollars for a ticket worth it tbh

user icons

user another lando like, jolene im begging you pls dont take my man😔

user its the other way around for me😩 lando needs to back off my girl

user 🔥

landonorris amazing performance😍

user oh we're getting bold??? user down bad lando is my favorite lando fr user OMGGG FUTURE WAG Y/N??

user STOP is she the reason lando went to that cowboys game a few weeks ago

user going to her games and they're not even dating yet, gotta respect the game tbh😭

user sorry to break girls' hearts but there's videos of her and lando talking at the gp and he was blushing and giving her heart eyes the whole time

user literally came to her account cause of that video HAHAH

landonorris

liked by danielricciardo, maxfewtrell and 930,482 others

landonorris 'murica

view all comments

user PASSENGER PRINCESS LANDO???

user ARE THOSE DCC BOOTS IN THE LAST SLIDE???

user it HAS to be the cheerleader he just followed cause they wear the exact same boots ↪user her name is Y/N!! put some respect in our dcc queen's name ↪user yes maam🫡, i apologize for my ignorance as a brit

user lando in a cowboy hat?? SHOW IT TO ME NOW RACHEL

maxfewtrell man you never let me drive when youre in the car

landonorris yeah cause i dont trust u maxfewtrell YOUVE KNOWN ME LONGER THAN Y/N??this comment has been deleted

user did max just confirm it is y/n THEE DCC in the last slide🧍‍♀️

user LMFAOO i know lando gave him an earful after that deleted comment user too late for him to delete, I HAVE IT PRINTED OUT! Y/N AND LANDO CONFIRMED

user streets are saying it's y/n in the last slide... we lost her guys😔

user AND WE LOST HER TO A BRITISH MAN💔💔

user now we wait for y/n to follow him and start soft launching too

danielricciardo glad i trusted the process

landonorris TOLD YOU user i hate when they comment inside jokes, got me feeling left out :(

user wait the way he let her drive even though hes said before he hates not being in control, meaning he already trusts her🥹

user i love her already omg

user lando dating an american cheerleader is actually the most lando thing ever

yourusername

liked by landonorris, maxfewtrell and 18,392 others

yourusername current side mission: turning a brit into a texan

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user bae just tag lando norris, we know it's him

user NOO I WAS HOPING IT WAS JUST RUMORS💔

user girl lando does not know who you are ↪user i was talking about y/n ↪user oh sorry, valid reaction tbh

user the matching pictures of her driving and him as the passenger princess on his post omg this is the most perfect soft launch i fear

user i waited for 3 and half years for her and white man did it in one week😩

user her soft launching as if max didnt already confirm it on landos post

yourusername shhh just pretend you didn't see that, cant have my soft launch ruined ↪user sorry maam, whatever you say maam

user lando is so posh but she has him driving dirt bikes and going to rodeos HAHAHHA

user the way he looked just watching a football game was hilarious, i cant even imagine a rodeo

user as a european f1 fan, can someone explain why she's so loved? (IM ASKING IN THE NICEST WAY POSSIBLE I SWEAR)

user LOL she's a cheerleader for the dallas cowboys football team which is a huge deal here! it's pretty hard to join the squad but shes a fifth year veteran (about to retire after this year) and she's known as one of the sweetest and kindest leaders on the squad!! she also met lando at a game!

user does she know she has twitter freaking out with this post?

user not that im complaining but this is the first time i see an f1 couple getting so much love HOW AND WHY??

user well y/n is quite literally america's sweetheart

yourusername

liked by landonorris, pietra.pilao and 23,492 others

yourusername one last christmas show🥹

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user what is dcc without y/n☹️

user gonna miss her so bad

user still looked amazing

user okay but is she still with that nascar driver or whatever cause wowwwww😍

landonorris yes, she is still with the FORMULA ONE DRIVER. ↪user OMG AN OFFICIAL CONFIRMATION???

pietra.pilao be with me please?

landonorris 🤨

landonorris woah woah you didnt say you were gonna post this one??? you look too good???

yourusername what happened to not commenting on each other's post until the hard launch🙂 (but ty ily) landonorris i take that back. (ily more) ↪user theyre losers but i love them your honor

footballplayer 🔥

landonorris yeah nice try🤣

user landos fighting for his life in these comments HAHA

user he fr ruined y/n's soft launch cause he cant handle these commenters hitting on her omfg

user kinda scared to comment, i dont want lando coming for me

user please dont be in love with someone else😩please dont have somebody waiting on you😩

landonorris she is in fact in love with someone else and does in fact have somebody waiting on her (ME) ↪user lando is a loser bf CONFIRMED

landonorris

liked by yourusername, danielricciardo and 973,492 others

landonorris winter break means football games with my beautiful girl

view all comments

user finally the hard launch

user she literally is turning him into a texan GRAHHHH🦅🇺🇸

user *pretends to be shocked*

yourusername ILYYYYYYY

landonorris ❤️

user sad about her retiring dcc but happy we'll be getting so much WAG content

user OMG i didnt even think of this ↪user already imagining the paddock fits😩

user ig i have to accept shes officially taken :(

landonorris yeah. ↪user chill bro aint nobody taking her from you

user bro saw all the thrist comments on her last post and decided to hard launch

maxfewtrell ranch in texas when??

yourusername OMG SOON PLEASE @/LANDONORRIS?? ↪landonorris um idk about that ↪yourusername 🤨 ↪landonorris I MEANT ILL THINK ABOUT IT!! IT SOUNDS LIKE A GREAT IDEA😁🫶

user shes got him on a LEASH

danielricciardo ahh feels like yesterday that you bought tickets for the game AND the flight to have a 5 second interaction with the cute dcc

user damn lando was down bad wth😭 landonorris thank you for making this public information. ↪yourusername hey at least you beat the norizz allegations! eventually...

user as an american, im allowing you to count cota as your home race for bagging this queen

user oh lando norris i underestimated your game

User he gets the y'all pass now

landonorris THANK YALLLLLL

user the americanfication of lando is not something i knew i needed, but i did. thank you miss y/n

yourusername youre welcome, he will be listening to zach bryan and dolly parton in no time🫡

notes: one thing about me is im gonna start getting lazy at the end of every smau i make. LOL. anyway i love american reader if you havent noticed already :)

[whenlilyfallsinlove]

jolene

james potter x reader

this is not a good fic for james.. (love him tho) and my remus bias is SHOWING. i love lily. no lily hate.

jolene, jolene, jolene, jolene i'm begging of you please don't take my man jolene, jolene, jolene, jolene please don't take him just because you can

a small part of you knew that, although you were the one dating james potter, lily evans still held a place in his heart. i mean it was sad right? someone you were in love with, someone you were dating, was in love with someone else. but for some reason you had grown accustomed to it, was this stupid of you? yes, maybe. but you didn't want to lose james, as both a boyfriend and a friend. so it felt like a logical thing.

you knew lily evans didn't like james either, not even as a friend. she hated the boy. you thought back to the gossip you had had with her, marlene and dorcas when they found out you were dating him.

"merlin y/n, james?" lily had whispered-shouted the very night she found out that you were dating him.

"hey.. he's not that bad." you chuckle.

"that's not gonna convince her, it's a well known fact lils hates james." marlene laughs.

"that's true." you respond.

"and i thought you liked remus anyway." lily teases.

"that was in like 3rd year, i've been over that ages." you feel your face heat. sure you had liked moony once, but you had liked james for a while now.

"he's better than james though, seriously you can do better y/n." lily tells you.

you giggle, but then see dorcas with a confused look on her face.

"you alright dorcas?" marlene raises an eyebrow.

"yeah i just.. i have a question." dorcas speaks up.

you nod at her to speak.

"when did james get over lily? i'm not saying he doesn't like you of course y/n, but up until the other week, he was obsessed with her." dorcas thinks aloud, in all fairness, asking the question on everyones lips.

you sigh.

"i asked him that, he told me he was trying to deflect the fact that he really liked me, and he was too nervous to flirt with me so flirted with lily instead to hide his true feelings." you mutter, now realising that james' reasoning was.. maybe not the best.

"aww thats cute y/n.." marlene sees the look on your face and tries to comfort you.

"yeah." you smile, weakly.

"and don't worry y/n, i would never go anywhere near potter. and i think he does like you and not me." lily reassures you.

noticing your discomfort, the girls changed the subject, but you couldn't nudge the feeling of doubt in your chest. now that you thought about it, james' reasoning felt a bit.. excuse like? but no, he asked you out, not lily. so he must like you?! relationships were complicating; you guessed you'd have to wait to see how things played out.

your beauty is beyond compare with flaming locks of auburn hair with ivory skin and eyes of emerald green

"hello gorgeous." james grins at you cheekily, planting a kiss on your cheek as you take a seat next to him at the gryffindor table.

"guys do we really need to be doing this at eight o'clock in the morning." sirius fake gags. you stick your tongue out at him in response, causing him to laugh.

"just cos you're lonely padfoot." james chuckles.

sirius playfully rolls his eyes at him, and you see remus looking at you from the other side of the table. you smile at him which he returns but looks away quickly, feeling like he's been caught doing something he shouldn't.

james wraps an arm around your waist, and starts telling you whatever new prank him and sirius were planning on snape.

"and then we were planning to turn his hair green." he smiles at you.

"poor snape." you tease.

"what? you planning on leaving me for snivellus?" james raises an eyebrow, playfully.

"of course." you respond chuckling.

your playful banter was interrupted by lily approaching you, carrying your transfiguration book. of course, you invited her to sit with yourself and the marauders but she didn't like to be near james for long periods of time.

"y/n, you left this in our dorm this morning." she smiles at you and hands you the book.

you smile back. she looked extra pretty today, her green eyes sparkling, her auburn hair shiny. it made you feel a little self-conscious.

"thanks lils, what would i do without you?" you laugh.

"you wouldn't be able to cope, that's for sure." lily smiles at you, giving you a wave, heading back to her own seaat.

"thank godric for that, mcgonagall would've been fuming-" you turn back to james, your words faltering seeing his face.

his face was bright red and he looked distracted as he gazed off into the distance. you followed his gaze to see what was wrong with him. then you realised. james was looking at lily. and he had a stupid goofy smile on his face. what a prick! he was YOUR boyfriend.

"james, are you okay?" you snap him out of his daze.

"yeah yeah, perfectly fine love." he turns back to you, his blush fading.

then it was as if everything was back to normal. sirius, james and peter engaging back into their normal conversation. you were quieter however. remus remained quiet as well, noticing the dejected look on your face. he gave you a comforting smile across the table and you gave him a weak one in return.

at that moment, you wished nothing more to be lily evans.

your smile is like a breath of spring your voice is soft like summer rain and i cannot compete with you jolene.

"i don't want to feel like a second choice to you james! i love you." you sighed. this was yours and james's first argument. and you HATED it.

"i love you too y/n, of course you're not my second choice!" james tries to comfort you.

"i just feel like you're just settling for me because lily doesn't like you!" you admitted.

"well that's not true y/n, i told you.. i was using lily to coverup my feelings for you." james lets out a exasperated sigh.

"sometimes it doesn't feel that way james, i don't want to be the person you settle for just because you cannot have her (iykyk)" you rub your forehead with your hand.

"y/n.." james puts his arm around you. "it's you i'm dating.. not evans. don't be jealous!"

you scoff. "of course i'm jealous, she's beautiful and you were obsessed with her long before dating me."

"and i'm not anymore. just drop it y/n. i love you not her." james frowns.

you sigh and cave in.

"i don't like arguing with you james." you say, as you rest your head on his shoulder.

"i don't like arguing with you either y/n" he sighs, and pulls you closer.

you couldn't stop thinking about lily though. you were friends with her, and she would never intentionally hurt you. you knew deep down james still liked her, feelings don't go away that easy.

he talks about you in his sleep and there's nothing i can do to keep from crying when he calls your name jolene

gryffindor house were infamous for throwing the best parties. and tonight was living proof. gryffindor had just won a quidditch match against slytherin which of course meant a big celebration. and of course, your boyfriend and captain of the team james potter was the main centre of attention.

"he's nuts." you shake your head at sirius, when you see james dancing and obnoxiously singing to dancing queen by abba in the middle of the common room.

"he's bloody brilliant." sirius takes a sip of firewhiskey, chuckling.

the man in question headed towards you.

"y/n, would you care to join me." he jokingly bows down, holding his hand out for you to take.

"indeed i would." you giggle and take his hand.

he pulls you to the middle of the common room, twirling you around/ you laugh and join in singing and dancing. you could tell he was a little drunk but you didn't mind.

as the party went on, you had somehow lost contact with james. he was a social butterfly of course, probably talking to his friends. you yourself were stood with marlene, dorcas and lily, sipping your drinks, giggling at the antics of some of your housemates.

the party eventually thinned out, at about 3 in the morning, when mcgonagall told them to quiet down. eventually it was just you and as you looked towards the jukebox (which was playing jolene by dolly parton) remus carrying a half unconscious james.

you walked up to the two.

"he's drunk too much." remus chuckles.

"unsurprising, i'm sure he had already had about 4 firewhiskeys in the first hours." you smile affectionately at james.

remus notices your smile, and smiles wider.

"you don't usually come to parties, do you remus?" your question catches remus off guard.

"n-no i don't. just wanted to support my friends." he responds, knowing that was probably a good answer judging by the smile on your face.

you turn back to look at james.

"let's get you to bed ay?" you say, trying to wake him.

"l-lily?" james whispers, seemingly in his sleep.

your heart dropped. of course he was dreaming about lily.

"i'm not lily." you grit your teeth. "would you rather have her take care of you?"

remus sees your face and is quick to comfort you.

"don't worry y/n, he's drunk, he probably doesn't know any better." he says.

you nod and sit down on one of the armchairs.

how could you ever compete with lily evans?

[eggcats]

I decided it would be really funny, if the reason Husk knows getting Vox to like you is the key to surviving Alastor, is because when Alastor first took his soul, Vox HATED him

Because Alastor saw this sad wet pathetic cat man drunk in the alley behind his casino and was like "you can't take care of yourself so I will" and then decided to gamble with him to win his soul

Except, that is also essentially how Alastor met VOX, and so when Alastor comes home one day like "look what I got!" and Vox learns what happened, he's like, "I will NOT be replaced," and just hates Husk on sight

(Vox, mentally, "What's so good about HIM that he takes HIS soul?? Is MY soul not good enough?!?!")

Neither Husk nor Alastor knows this, tho, so to them, it's just Vox deciding to hate someone randomly - meanwhile, in the background, Vox is singing Jolene while sharpening a knife

(The idea of being attracted to the creepy cannibalistic fuck who took his soul is so out of left field that Husk, who generally is good at reading people, doesn't realize that's Vox's issue with him - so the entire time he's standing there like🧍‍♂️trying desperately to not do ANYTHING that'll piss Vox off more).

(Alastor also has no idea, because not only is finding someone OTHER than his picture box so absurd it's not even to be considered, he's very bad at picking up on social cues and it never comes up to Rosie for her to tell him the issue - Alastor just thinks Vox hates cats the same way he hates dogs, and is like, oh okay makes sense moving on).

Vox eventually gets over it (kinda) when Alastor is like, dear, did you just want me to rip apart his soul on my broadcast? Did YOU want to do it this time? And basically just offers to absolutely end Husk's (after)life for him, no questions asked.

Vox decides to let Husk live so that Husk knows that he's only alive because VOX said so, as a "don't even THINK of trying to take my man, you hussy" warning. (Once again, neither Alastor nor Husk have ANY idea about this, lmao).

So now Husk is like - step 1 to not being murdered is to get Vox to decide to not kill you. Okay, no further questions.

Meanwhile Vox is just watching Husk like "I am always fucking vigilant" and constantly scaring the fur off of that poor cat man.

(Vox only relents when Husk is basically tossed at Angel like a Pokémon and he sees that Husk definitely is interested in Angel and is like, good. Stay away from my husband).

[starryaugust]

Batfam members but they are gender bent with why I choose each name

Minerva Pennyworth - Minerva is the Roman goddess of wisdom while Alfred means wise, I also think it really fits (both the vibe and Alfred’s character)

Willow Wayne - The name Bruce means “the willowlands”

Rachel “Rae” Hannah Grayson - honestly I just didn’t find any feminine name that have the same meaning as Richard that gave me Dick vibe so I just choose Rachel because it’s similar, I choose Hannah because it has a similar meaning to John

Bar Gordon - I choose Bar both because it’s really similar to Barbara and because the meaning are similar enough (Barbara means foreign while Bar means Wilderness)

Elisha “Eli”/Jolene Lorelai Todd - see, I couldn’t choose a first name for the life of me. Elisha has basically the same meaning as Jason (the lord is salvation and the lord is my salvation) while Jolene just fits, Lorelai means murmuring rock (what THAT means is behind me tbh) while Peter means rock or stone

Tova Jacklyn Drake - I have 3 reasons for choosing Tova: 1. It’s a Jewish name and Tim is Jewish 2. While Tova means good/pleasant it can somehow very vaguely be interpreted as honoring god which is the meaning of Timothy 3. It’s my grandmas name so I’m a bit biased (I do hate the fact there’s no good sounding nickname for Tova tho), I choose Jacklyn because it’s similar to Jackson

Stephen Brown - I don’t really think I need to explain my thought process with this one

Dahlia Thomas - honestly I just like that name and it’s similar enough to Duke

Cassius “Cass” Cain - I love the name Cassius and it has a similar vibe to Cassandra (and Cass can still be a nickname)

Maia Wayne - I can’t explain thus one for the life of me

[lillambtotheslaughter]

Your daddy dropped you as a baby tell him to fuck off.

Kidnapping and keeping bae locked in my room because nobody else is worthy of looking upon her beauty but me 💖

[mylittleredgirl]

favorite and least favorite parts of each trek, with absolutely no thought put into it before making this list:

🚀 classic trek favorite: the ~aesthetic~. fuckin LOVE big chunky plastic buttons and beepy things, the mini-skirts, the sparkly metallic fabric, the whole deal. least favorite: janice rand leaves forever :( :( every single appearance she had was BONKERS how am i supposed to experience that and then ever hope to fill that void 🪐 tng favorite: soooooo soothing to know that our guys will always be both kind and correct and at the end of the episode i will learn something about how to be a better person. also romulans are there. least favorite: shit fuck i shouldn't have started this post because i'm already drawing a blank. ok ok i hate that the ship's counselor role got nerfed into a "therapist on the bridge" when it's actually so so important!! that needed to be explored so explicitly that dudebros on the internet have to shut up about it forever ⚾️ deep space nine favorite: THE CHARACTERS MY FRIENDS. the cast of dozens where every single character right down to the randos on the promenade are great. headed up by benjamin lafayette sisko and kira nerys, truly characters of all time least favorite: dukat's insanity/pah-wraith arc. like i do get why this narrative parallel makes sense against sisko as the prophets' emissary but also, it's bad. 🥔 voyager (that's a leola root by the way) favorite: i LOVE the early seasons where everyone is so adorable and spunky and they're just tooling around the delta quadrant being terrible at making friends. also tuvok is there. least favorite: kes leaves forever :( :( i hear you out there saying "fury" but come here. look at me. look at me. kes leaves forever. 🛰 enterprise favorite: controversial actually but i love t'pol's arc. i DID NOT love it as it was airing because watching poor jolene blalock having to act her way through ever more demeaning episodes is painful and terrible, but t'pol is magnificent actually? the fish out of water vulcan finding herself in foreign waters?? self-destruction on the way to rediscovering her own personal relationship to logic??? imagine if we'd got three more seasons of her with manny coto in charge it would've been glorious. least favorite: can we PLEASE do something with hoshi and travis i am BEGGING. also physically painful what american jingoism did to captain archer but i might have emotionally coped with it better if travis got lines. 🍄 discovery favorite: michael burnham is the light of my life she makes me cry out emotions that have been buried since i was in utero i don't even know. also the changing opening sequence my beloved least favorite: need one of those serial killer string boards to figure out what's going on sometimes??? can't say that too loudly tho because the discovery haters can smell blood in the water 💃 short treks favorite: THE CONCEPT I LOVE THIS least favorite: more??????? :( 🥷 star trek picard favorite: seven of nine in comfy sweaters kissing a girl filled holes in my life i didn't know were there!!!?!?!?? least favorite: don't like when picard is a jerk :( don't like when no soji and elnor :( :( :( 🤪 lower decks favorite: every second is a relentless outpouring of love for star trek, it's like a sleepover where all your friends are sitting around talking about how much they love tng except your friends are 900% funnier. least favorite: i have a hard time with cartoon violence sometimes so i get TENSE and also badgey haunts my nightmares for real for real 👨‍🍳 strange new worlds - actually i have only seen the first episode despite posting about it as if i have seen all of it haha my bad SO favorite: new star trek to watch!!!!! least favorite: now everyone knows i haven't watched it yet and i am losing trekkie credibility babes 😬 👩‍👧‍👦 prodigy favorite: rok-tak my DAUGHTER least favorite: that feeling of being in a warner brothers cartoon and there's an anvil above all our heads with J/C DISCOURSE painted on it just waiting for the show to make a wrong move

i swear i must have forgotten at least one series there is so much star trek now??? anyway feel free to make your own post about this, i am curious!! if you absolutely MUST i suppose it's ok to think about your answers for more than 30 seconds.

[cherubinym]

I offer you an 5, 9, and twenny four

5. Ok I know I draw a decent amount of ship content but surprisingly when I actually try to like. Think. My mind goes blank. Like huh this isn't really something I heavily focus on despite what it seems?? I mostly friend-ship charas I think would have good chemistry together lol

I am looking at Nymiera/Vitus, Kreiss/Martin, Lavender/Huey, Risa/Xara, and Kenneth/Taelia with my beady eyes for story based stuff tho.

Anju/Hazuki is cute too, I guess I'm just naming the stuff I talk about most. Nancy/Tesla/Jolene also cute- the moms ever.

Whatever's going on with SPU Delivery Guy/Truck Guy/Piano Lady. Eizen/V purely because it's funny af. Nightmare blunt rotations. Patty/Cera or Patty/Odessa, Spector/Odessa and Reina/Saki also sounds funny. Shoutout to Rhodea/Florin, valorshipping, nightnuke, madecass, and undergrowth too. plus zetta/the mfs au that my friend likes to cook up

Mr. Luck/Rorim purely because again. It sounds funny lmfao

Ok that was actually a lot. eat up !! i mean i technically listed what looks interesting rather than favs but jhsjhshjs. despite all my romanticism im more of an observer tbhhhh.

9. people need to talk about alexandra more. and nymiera but i mean in a nuanced way rather than what a lot of ppl did and immediately HARD hated her after the regi quests like she was the Complete scum of the earth lol. i wanna see more 3rd layer and .karma zeight talk simply bc The Shrimplications.

24. eizen. LOL. ok and spector cause he's sillyyyyyyy. i also like the xenogene cast but that's bc im biased </3.

also eden. been an eden fan since day one babeyyyy. my scrimblo with one scene and one selection of fun facts and one silly pinup before their actual official art <3. slut.

[declinlalune]

Three Gays in a Predicament || Andy, Leah, Nicole

TIMING: current. LOCATION: art walk in downtown. PARTIES: @phoenixleah, @nicsalazar & @declinlalune SUMMARY: andy, leah, and nicole decide to have a nice time out on an art walk before they're rudely interrupted. CONTENT WARNINGS: sibling death mentions.

“Did you know she wrote ‘Jolene’ and ‘I will always love you’ in one day?” 

Nicole heard the guide call out to the group of tourists snapping pictures right in front of them. A small gathering she actively tried to walk past, bumping shoulders, and getting elbowed on the ribs in the process. She tugged on Leah’s fingers, gently pushing forward when her smaller half looked to be winding up to interject in the conversation. Nicole offered her most sincere apologetic smile, one that promised she could share her Dolly Parton facts or dispute the guide’s claims in the safety of… not this crowd. 

All things considered, Nicole was handling the outing well. It wasn’t a typical tourist spot for her. That often entailed less human interaction and more physical exertion, plus a completely different landscape. But it was fun (aside from the current tourist problem). Different. The idea of hanging out casually with a girlfriend and a friend seemed impossible not too long ago. That reminder of her progress eased some of the tension building up on her shoulders. Bursted the anxiety bubbling in her chest.

The last she heard, was a couple of teens talking about Dolly’s eyes moving, but they were no longer within earshot as Nicole led Leah and Andy toward another mural. This one, which garnered less interest, had a very distinct garlic smell in the air instead (which may have been the reason people were avoiding it). And yeah, she couldn’t ignore her stomach grumbling in response. Following her line of sight, her gaze landed on Andy when she asked, “should we… you wanna get something to eat before we continue?” while gesturing at the food trucks around.

Andy wasn’t sure how she didn’t know that Leah and Nicole were dating. Nicole had mentioned how she wasn’t in town a lot, but still. After having befriended Leah, Andy felt like she should’ve known that the other woman was in a steady relationship at the very least. Getting closer to the two of them felt both like a blessing and a curse. For one, Andy was grateful that she finally had friends her own age, and with like interests, too. The guilt, however, was hard to ignore. She knew that both Nicole and Leah were not human, but they had no idea that she knew that. The urge to tell them was overwhelming, but she didn’t want to lose two friends. She knew it was selfish, and at the end of the day, she hated herself for it. 

But it didn’t stop her from accepting invitations to hike with Nicole, or to visit Leah’s shop and just talk. Andy hated that she knew what she knew, but there’d be nothing she could do to get away from it, so she had to accept it. Maybe one day she could tell them, but not when their budding friendship from occasional hangouts had maybe turned into something more. Something real. Because Andy and Alex wouldn’t have to leave Wicked’s Rest. They could stay this time. 

The art walk hadn’t been so much her idea as a thrown in comment about how it offered enough to do while still allowing movement. Andy didn’t think that her first hangout with the couple should’ve been third-wheeling at the cinema. 

The guide continued to explain the origins of another mural as Andy followed Nicole to another painting, bright and bold on the wall. She wasn’t sure why she’d never come to the art walk before. The smell of the garlic made it so that Andy was beginning to taste it on her tongue. Mouth watering involuntarily, Andy looked over at Nicole as she offered the choice of grabbing a bite to eat. “You read my mind.” Andy smiled at her friend before looking at Leah. The two were impossibly cute together. Like they were meant for one another. Before Andy had really had grown roots anywhere, she thought that kind of thing– relationships, were things of fiction. She’d seen them in television shows and in music videos, but hadn’t ever imagined that she’d feel the adoration radiating from somebody towards another person herself. It hadn’t helped that her parents weren’t exactly the loving type. “I kind of want fries… Do you think they have that? I’m not sure I’ve actually ever eaten from any of these.” It was a dumb question, because almost every food truck advertised some version of fries, whether it was Belgian style or topped with chili and queso. “Answered my own question, never mind. But food. Yes.” 

Leah had to work to actively continue walking along with Nicole and Andy. She loved a good tour, especially from someone as knowledgeable as a museum docent.   In another life, where she wasn’t terrified of public speaking, maybe Leah could have been one- although she was sure her topic would have been a bit more academic than the queen of country.    As they ended up in front of the garlic scented mural, Leah suddenly had a craving for garlic bread.  “I’m down.  I wonder if that bread truck is still around!”  

As they made their way over to the trucks, Leah made a point of people watching.  It was an activity she often participated in, especially when Nicole was there to guide her along the way while she was distracted.  With a crowd as big as they were in, it was fun to take a guess as to who might be supernatural, or who might be a normie, or a hunter, or who might just be an asshole, too.  She pointed toward a food truck that exclusively served potatoes with a grin.  “I think you’ll find what you’re looking for at ‘Spuds’, Andy.  I’m hankering for a loaded baked potato myself, since it seems the garlic bread is out of the question.”  

The line was longer than she had expected, but it just meant more time for people watching.  “We should take one of those guided tours one day”, she said to her companions, watching a haphazard group bustle by them.  I think that sort of controlled chaos looks sort of… thrilling!”  The line moved forward, but she walked backwards as it moved since she was facing Andy and Nicole.  “Or we could try a natural history museum, or even a more formal art gallery.”

Nicole wanted to tell Leah there was no bread truck around, not one that she could pick up with her keen senses, but that might end up revealing a little more about herself to Andy. She knew it’d come a time to disclose that part of herself, she had no reason to believe Andy would harbor negative feelings towards supernaturals, but she still had a long way to go before blurting it out in the middle of an art boardwalk. “We’ll get you that bread later” she promised, a smitten smile playing on her lips. 

She walked in silence, allowing Leah and Andy to work out the best snack option. Which turned out to be a truck specialized in potatoes. It was fine, good even. Nicole liked potatoes. She just wished the line and the crowd weren’t so…long. She stepped back to let Leah go in front, the pads of her fingers tapping her girlfriend’s palm three times before releasing. I love you. Leah would know what to order for her, she didn’t have to stress about it. Crossing her arms over her chest, she turned towards Andy, eyebrows lifting in amusement as Leah geeked out about potential tour ideas. Not even close to the first time she had done so, nor the last time she’d do it. But always impossibly adorable. “You know I’ll follow, as long as there’s a food break. What about you, are you a history or art buff or just… arm buff?” she nodded at Andy, face morphing in disgust as she heard her own cringy joke. She could guess the answer. Andy was a lot more like Nicole than Leah, but she had learned not to stick to assumptions when it came to her friend. 

The line had been long, but moved surprisingly fast, which led to the trio reaching the window in a matter of minutes. Nicole stepped to the side, leaving Leah and Andy to take care of things. And once the orders were placed, she waved at the pair to join her by the side of the truck to wait for their food. She continued where the conversation had been left off before they were interrupted. “I don’t know if Wicked’s rest has that many… uh, cultural places though”.

Andy looked around, gaze scanning for the coveted garlic bread truck, but it didn’t seem like it had made an appearance. Andy looked over at Nicole as she explained to Leah that they could get it sometime later. A small grin pulled at the corners of her lips and she averted her gaze, watching as a kid with a balloon ran up behind his parents. She had reassured Nicole that it wouldn’t be weird if it were just the three of them and she wanted to hold onto that promise, even if it hadn’t been much of a promise at all. Andy didn’t want to make things awkward just because she didn’t have a hand to hold. Besides, she didn’t think she’d fit the part of that– of somebody else’s other half. It was something she had made peace with. It was nice enough to see that love did exist in a way that was not painful. 

Leah’s voice pulled Andy from her deep-seated thoughts and she looked back towards the shorter woman gratefully. “Spuds?” She glanced up towards the food truck’s menu, and sure enough, they had fries on it. A few different types, too. Andy followed the women into the line, taking a spot just behind Nicole. She craned her neck so that she could see the rest of the menu, all the while listening to Leah as she explained that maybe they could do something else on another day, too. It made Andy glad to know she hadn’t been too weird or too boring. Granted, she didn’t know if museums were much of her thing, but if Leah wanted to do it, Andy could sacrifice the part of herself that would find it boring– she’d find something interesting about the museum for her friend’s sake. “That would be cool. I’m not sure I’ve ever been to anything like that.” She didn’t think that her visit to Metzli’s gallery had been close to any kind of tour given what had happened, but she knew that Metzli owed her, so maybe it was something she could suggest down the line. 

Nicole’s joke caught Andy off guard and she let out an embarrassed laugh. “I think art is cool, you know? But…” She looked at Leah before shrugging, “I’d be willing to try it out. New things, or whatever, don’t wanna be a stick in the mud.” Andy wanted to give it a chance, even if she knew prematurely that it wouldn’t be much of her scene. 

Through their discussion, the line moved with ease, and Andy found herself shoving a five dollar bill into the tip jar after ordering her garlic fries and pink lemonade. “I think there are a few? But I mostly spend time outdoors.” She thought about what Nicole had said about Leah being on the more fragile side. She wasn’t sure what that could mean for what she was, but Andy decided not to think about it. She didn’t want to speculate over her friends’ identities. Andy felt her chest tighten with guilt and she cleared her throat to dislodge the feeling. “I think there are some boat tours, too?” She wasn’t sure how seasick either of them got, and to be honest, Andy wasn’t sure about herself, either. “There were a lot of pride events, so maybe something we can do next year?" If their friendships lasted that long. Andy hoped they would.

Leah smiled softly at Nicole’s little symbol, liking that they had things for just them.  It was subtle enough, she hoped, that Andy wouldn’t feel left out or like a third wheel with the two of them, but prominent enough that she felt their connection without any words spoken.  She let Andy order for herself before she stepped up, ordering a loaded baked potato for herself and Smokey Mexican Beef Wedges, no sour cream, for Nicole.  “You just gotta know where to look”, she said toward her girlfriend, dropping some cash in the tip jar.  “Or I guess, it depends on what you consider cultured.  Back in High School, I used to make this brochure about all the best, most interesting spots to visit in town.  I wonder if my mom kept it.”

As they moved to the side to wait for their orders to be called, she suddenly got the feeling like she was being watched.  Not by Andy or Nicole, obviously, they were all looking at each other, but by someone in the crowd, maybe.  She scanned it quickly, but nothing looked out of the ordinary.  It was probably nothing, she surmised, but she felt her shoulders tense in slight apprehension anyway.  She looked toward Andy, a small smile playing on her lips.  “I don’t think it’s a stick in the mud to have a difference of opinion… maybe we could do some sort of cycle, you know?  Like, next time you pick where we go, then Nicole, then me.”  That way, everyone would get a chance to visit someplace they wouldn’t normally go.  At the mention of boats, though, Leah blanched.  She wondered if she visibly whitened like she felt she did.  “I will have to veto water adventures, though”, she said, trying to appear non-chalant.  “Rare water allergy”, she said to Andy to explain like she so often did, never willing to elaborate further.  She shared a glance with Nicole quickly before clearing her throat, moving the conversation along.  “Now pride sounds fun!  I’d definitely be down to dress up and celebrate if both of you would!”

“You did that?” Andy tried to imagine Leah in high school, or even Nicole. She tried to imagine herself, too, sitting at a desk with a notebook in front of her, a pen nervously tapping the desk as she tried to muck up the courage to ask a pretty girl to one of Leah’s events. Despite the fantasy and how she had longed for it once upon a time, Andy’s expression did nothing to betray her. Instead, she smiled. “That’s really cool that you put that much energy into it, but I’d love to see how it holds up.” Andy wondered how many places would have closed, either due to retirement or disaster. 

Andy scanned the crowd, mimicking Leah in the way she’d done so. Her eyes landed back on the smaller woman to see her visibly tense. Her brows lifted slightly, but she was brought out of her question as Leah explained that she had a water allergy. Andy knew that if she simply thought about it, connecting Nicole’s statement about Leah’s fragility to the fact that she didn’t like water, she could figure out exactly what her friend was, but Andy didn’t want to. She hated how invasive it was, and hated what it could mean down the line. She pushed the thought away before shrugging. “Oh, no problem.” Andy looked up at the sky, checking to make sure that it wouldn’t rain, but it was as sunny as could be, compared to how it’d been the last few weeks. She looked back at Leah, then to Nicole as Leah explained they should dress up for pride. “I’ve never done anything like that.” Andy paused for a moment before continuing, “I’ve always wanted to, though. My sister and I have done a few things, but…” She motioned towards the two women, slightly embarrassed, “it’d be the first time with friends.” 

Her eyes were on Leah as the pair reunited with her. And not for sappy reasons (though that was a given), but because Leah seemed to be carrying tension on her shoulders. It wasn’t there before. She watched her look around, then she noticed Andy joining her, and Nicole wondered what she had missed while they were buying their food. She mirrored the other two, eyes darting around. Looking for what? She wasn’t sure. But she realized the crowd had dispersed enough, only a small group waiting on their snacks remained. 

Anyway, it was a fleeting moment and though her eyes lingered on her girlfriend, the trio got back to discussing plans in no time. “I get seasick,” she supplied without missing a beat, examining Leah’s face for discomfort. She in fact, did not get seasick (she’d never been on a boat to know, more precisely). But she hoped it’d remove pressure off Leah to explain herself. Luckily, Andy wasn’t curious enough to ask. Or maybe, she was doing the thing she did during their hikes. Knowing when to drop topics. Regardless, Nicole appreciated it, swiftly moving on to Pride. “Hey, I’ve only been once—” she smiled at Andy, comforting, “last year. It was okay. I think… gotta make it happen for you next year” knowing what Andy had shared about relationships, or lack thereof, she was excited for her friend to experience something like that. She then turned to Leah. “You know how I feel about dressing up, but maybe one—” she was interrupted by a shout. Their food was ready.

Okay. ‘Spuds’ was fast. And their food was good. All qualms about it left Nicole as soon as she took the first (impossibly hot) bite. She let out a few pained huffs, pointing at the most isolated spot in the seating area. Sure, it wasn’t crowded anymore, but she still wanted to enjoy her food in peace, away from the rest of the world. On her peripheral vision she picked up a runner in the distance, but she thought nothing of it, save for the pang of annoyance. He wasn’t running on the trail. But whatever, maybe he was rushing somewhere. They kept walking, and he kept jogging. Until they were reaching the picnic table, and the steps grew louder, quicker. Determined. Nicole turned, watching the runner, now fully sprinting in their direction. Still unsuspecting, she inched closer to Leah, hoping to remove her from this guy’s path (with his speed, even an accidental bump could have serious consequences to her fragile bones). 

She urged Leah forward, but didn’t move fast enough to stop herself from colliding with him. Though it wasn't a normal collision. It felt more like a tackle. Only when Nicole’s back hit the ground, knocking the air out of her lungs, and she met his hateful gaze did she understand this wasn’t so accidental after all. She froze, then cowered as the shine of a blade came into view, bracing herself for pain she hadn’t felt in thirteen years, but could never forget. 

Their conversations about pride and high school hobbies and potatoes were blissful to a calming degree.  Really, Leah shouldn’t have been lulled by the bliss- someone who had been so keen on watching others since childhood should have been aware enough of her surroundings not to ignore those feelings of unease she had just had.  But the bliss was intoxicating, so much so that she’d nearly forgotten about the fear until she was ushered out of the way by Nicole, watching her get tackled to the ground quickly after.  

When people talk about natural responses to dangerous situations, they usually mention fight or flight, but a well-read person could tell you that there were actually 6 common ‘F’ fear responses when it came to high stress situations:  fight, flight, freeze, fawn, flood, and flop.  For flood, it explained a reaction that resulted in a multitude of emotions, sometimes presenting themselves as extreme and inappropriate dysregulation.  Leah had seen it as an observer plenty of times before, but this was the first time she felt it.  In a different situation, she would have tried to remember how she was feeling for research purposes.  

If she didn’t already know what this was, the blade against her girlfriend’s neck would have been a quick indicator that those feelings of eyes on them before, the tension that she let slip away from her body in a quick moment, was the same hunter who was here now. Her eye’s flashed toward Andy’s, thinking of all the times they’d danced around what they knew about the realities of Wicked’s Rest.  Leah had decided a long time ago that her friend definitely knew something, though, she supposed she was about to learn the extent of that knowledge.  Nothing like some good old exposure education.

There was a growl from the oaf on top of her girlfriend, and she resisted the urge to kick him right in the gut, worried about the force it would take to have any effect versus the fragility of her bones.  Fear turned into anger, and she had to clench her fists to stop the fire that threatened to erupt there.  Her eyes focused on the knife’s handle, careful to concentrate her energy there (her lack of experience made what she was about to do particularly risky- but she’d practiced temperature transfer enough times to feel it was worth it).  “You’re doing this in broad daylight?” she asked with a sneer, sending heat towards the knife’s handle.  “Sounds pretty desperate to me.  There are better ways to win your daddy’s approval, though.  You can start with a better fitting sweater.  Especially on a day that’s so… hot.”  She attempted to send another flash of heat toward the knife, hopefully enough to burn his hand for good.

If the three were friends, void of any other identities, then maybe they could have continued discussing plans for another time. Andy could recommend bringing bear claws with them wherever they ended up, and Leah would dive into the history of where bear claws originated, probably. Maybe Nicole wouldn’t have such a sad, wandering look behind her eyes. Maybe they could share things about themselves they were so obviously hiding. They could continue eating their food, peeling off towards a secluded spot for the sake of rest and shade rather than anything else. They could be three women, navigating friendship and what that meant with one another. There would be no secrets, and no hurried glances. 

But this was Wicked’s Rest, and it was not kind. Especially not to her current company, depending on who was watching. 

Andy stumbled back slightly as the man barreled towards them. He dove on top of Nicole, brandishing silver. She could recognize that glint anywhere. Within seconds, he was dropping the blade, cradling his hand. Andy wasn’t sure what had happened, but she shot a glance towards Leah. 

The hunter seethed as pain, red and hot, shot through the palm of his hand. The silver knife clattered to the side, and he shot a look towards the two figures behind him. One, a monster, and the other— an unnecessary trip down memory lane. Though she insisted she was not who he thought she was, any fool could see the lies that showed through her rushed excuses. He made a move to grab the knife again, planning to press the point directly into the balam’s chest. 

Andy moved quickly, dashing between Leah and the hunter. Gripping the back of his shirt, she yanked him backwards, sending him onto his ass. Her heart hammered in her ears and the taste of iron coated her tongue. Fear for herself, for her friends�� for what she would do to this man. Anger coiled in her like a spring as she used the momentum from pulling him off of Nicole and onto the ground. His shoulder blades made a sick cracking sound against the pavement, but she made no move to regret the ferocity in her movements. “Go!” Andy screamed at them, hand clamped down on his wrist as he tried to twist the knife towards her. From where she leaned over him, knee now digging into his chest, she could see the burn mark of the knife’s handle against his palm. What the hell had caused that? Any guessing could prove fatal, but if this man lived up to any kind of code, then she guessed he wouldn’t turn the knife on her, not unless he wanted to prove a point. 

“Putting on a show?” The hunter breathed, using every amount of strength he could to yank his hand out from her grip. After freeing himself, he grabbed the redhead by the back of her neck, pulling her to the side in one grand movement of putting her off balance. “Show them who you really are!” He grunted, twisting his body so that now he was on top of her, blade to her throat. “Why are you pretending!” 

The first time Nicole came in contact with the sharp end of a blade she hadn’t faced it at all. It had come from behind, torn through her shoulder, catching her by surprise. Her sister’s tiny hand slipped from her fingers as she fell to the ground. Whatever unfolded next was safely tucked away in the most primal part of her brain, out of reach. It belonged to the jaguar. So rationally, this wasn’t as bad. At least she could see the hunter’s intentions written all over his face this time. His disdain and his conviction etched on a sneer. At least this time, she understood why she might have been hunted. At least there were no little siblings nearby to keep safe (and no risk of failing again). But her body didn’t seem to care for any of that when ill timed memories of everything she had lost rushed through her, zapping inside her ribcage like lightning. 

Her heart seized in her chest. That unbearable ache had been dulled for a while, snuffed out into something manageable, under control though never quite extinguished, but now ignited again. Wild and devastating. Her shoulder blade throbbed with phantom pain, anticipating something much much worse as he readied to slice her throat. But it didn’t come. Instead he hissed in pain, and Nicole caught a glimpse of his hand, turning red, no doubt soon to be blistered. Leah. She should’ve taken advantage of that split second and push, used her strength to get him off, but her body was still in shock, heart pounding so painfully in her throat it felt like she might choke. 

She spotted his motion to grab the knife again and her chest heaved, before something (someone) pulled him back. She heard Andy’s order and Nicole finally felt herself get back into her body. Slowly, she sat up. Andy didn’t hold him off for long. Words were being exchanged, and had she not been dealing with so much already, she could’ve caught the obvious familiarity between the two people quarreling. All she saw instead, was the man shoving Andy to the ground, blade pointed at her. “Leah!” she pleaded, eyes filled with unshed tears. One more distraction. It was too much to ask for, she knew it. But she didn’t trust herself not to be a shaky, weak mess if she got up to help. 

Leah was at Nicole’s side the moment the hunter was ripped off of her.  Her hands tried to be everywhere at once;  under Nicole’s arms to help her up, petting at her hair, running over her face gently to check for any signs of injury… but they never quite landed in one spot.  Andy’s urging shook her out of her mini-trance, and somehow, she managed to get the two of them standing, placing herself in front of Nicole in the process.  

She squinted her eyes as she tried to process the exchange between the hunter and Andy.  Did they know each other?  If there had been more time to think, Leah might have been able to find a link here- an explanation for Andy’s subtle knowledge about the truth of the world around them, but everything was moving too quickly for her to properly process anything.  Instead, she looked at Andy in front of her, in the same predicament her girlfriend had been in only seconds before.  

“We already know, you idiot!”, she said, bluffing and catching Andy’s eyes.  What she was supposed to know, she wasn’t sure, but they could figure that all out later when there wasn’t a knife pressed to one of their necks.  Maybe, like she and Nicole, she was some rare, hidden supernatural species, one that was too subtle for even Leah to pick up on.  Her eyes fell to the knife, dangerously close to drawing blood from her friend.  She  knew if she didn’t weigh her options carefully, the hunter wouldn’t hesitate to hurt Andy.  He was quick, he was trained, and Leah knew better than to try to solve the problem by normal means.  

“I’d choose my next move wisely if I were you”, she said, her eyes quickly shifting to their surroundings.  Miraculously, everyone had seemingly left the area without noticing the commotion. There was a small tree in a planter a few yards away, and Leah took a few seconds to release enough heat in its direction long enough for it to catch fire, hoping it might distract or scare the hunter, or both.

“And like I said, it’s too hot today to be wasting your energy like this.  Much, too, hot…”  She was losing energy, and fast, but again she sent some heat in the direction of the hunter, this time focusing on his whole body instead of the tiny knife.  Slowly, she hoped, he’d feel his internal temperature rise and rise, so much so that maybe he’d be sure that it couldn’t go any higher without melting his insides, and even then Leah would let it get a little hotter before she took the heat back.  

Maybe it wouldn’t get that far; maybe the hunter would realize he was outnumbered and out-powered and give up before it had the chance to.  But the worst, most inner, feral parts of Leah hoped that it would.    

This was the second time that the man had accused her of being something she wasn’t. Or, rather, that she no longer was. She had shed that skin prior to her parents passing, but it didn’t seem to matter to him. He saw Andy’s mother in her, and therefore, with that recognition, he seemed to want something. Did he know about what happened? Did he know Alex? 

Her thoughts were jumbled as she craned her neck, trying to bury herself into the concrete below her to put distance between the knife and her throat. The man continued to mumble, enough venom in his words to even poison the kindest of minds. “Get off of me!” Andy tried to slip beneath his grip, but the movement brought the knife closer with the threat of drawing blood. She was strong, but without constant training, there’d be no match against somebody who had continued to keep up with such a thing. 

The hunter’s eyes glittered at the promise of pinning the woman to her absolution. To show those she walked freely with that she, too, was a wolf in sheep’s clothing. That just like him, she would spill their blood. At first, he thought her hesitance had come with what happened to her parents. He had known her mother, and she was a spitting image. It was the only reason he was able to tell, with certainty, that she was like him. But she didn’t seem to want to be. It angered him, that she thought just because her parents had passed, she could get out of this. Of her destiny; of putting monsters into the ground. How dare she walk freely amongst them?

Just as he was about to press the blade deeper, something— no, a phoenix, he realized, (with both the burn on his palm and the way the tree had suddenly gone up in flames), started to make him sweat from the inside out. The warmth spread through his body in a way that made him want to peel his skin off for some kind of relief. The groan that left him was agonizing, and perspiration began to bead along his skin. 

Andy used the number of distractions to her advantage. Due to the way he was sweating (gross), the knife slipped easily from his grip. She bucked her hips and twisted, jabbing her forearm against his throat to create distance between herself and the hunter. She flipped him to the side and scrambled away from the other two women, not daring reach to them for help. She’d gotten them into this mess. Either Leah or Nicole had done something. She was betting it had been Leah, given Nicole’s desperation. So her friend was a phoenix. That was cool. Then again, she wasn’t so sure they’d be friends after this. Slowly, she got to her feet, her hand to her throat.

The hunter stayed on the ground for a moment longer with no relief to be found. His insides were burning. He was going to die here, and that stupid bitch wasn’t going to help him. She would let him die. “You’re a traitor,” the man hissed, grasping at his chest, pulling his shirt away from his skin. “You do nothing to help me, and instead you help them, you’re a traitor!” 

As much as Andy wanted to tell him to go and cry a fucking river, she couldn’t seem to speak. She was a traitor. She’d been called it plenty of times before. Sometimes, jokingly by the other kids in the hunter camps. Even by her own cousin— though, nobody had known exactly how far that went at the time. “You need to go.” It was not directed at the hunter, but instead to Leah and Nicole. What if this guy had friends? “Please. I’ll— I’ll take care of this.” 

Leah’s distractions were working, and for that, she was grateful.  Sometimes her powers were a hit or miss.  She wondered if normal sirens and phoenixes- those who grew up surrounded by others like them, got some sort of training on how to control their supernatural differences.  Leah was 10 before she realized she could produce fire, after an argument with her sister that made her so angry she nearly burned their treehouse down.  Since then, she’d been trying to do a training of her own (in secret, that is, until she moved out of her parents house.  They were always worried it was too dangerous to even try).  At first it was hard, because she only seemed to be able to control temperature or throw fire at all when she was incredibly pissed off- a feat that only seemed possible when she was arguing with her siblings.  But over time, though nowhere near perfect, control became easier.  

She learned that day that fear must have been a trigger as well.

She was so tuned in on keeping the heat around the hunter that her ears were hyperfocused to what he was saying- so much so that she dropped the act momentarily as she processed his words.  Traitor.  Why would he be calling Andy a Traitor unless…?

She stared at Andy, the circumstances and coincidences of all of this finally coming together to make perfect sense.  The hunter was calling Andy a traitor because she was one, too.  It all made sense now, but Leah didn’t quite want to believe it.  

Instinctively, she placed herself in front of Nicole, licking her lips.  Nicole deserved an explanation, but she couldn’t muster one.  “Andy, are you…?”  She swallowed, but then grabbed Nicole’s wrist behind her, walking backwards and pulling Nicole along with you.  She wanted to ask the accusatory question, but her concern for her friend overshadowed the betrayal she felt.  Instead, she said, “Are you sure?”

She didn’t bother waiting for an answer, though, because the more her mind wrapped around the situation, the more she knew that she was right.  She had incapacitated the hunter enough that Andy would be able to deal with him, and now the priority needed to be to get Nicole to safety.  She ran as fast as her low energy would allow her to, toward people or the car or anywhere that might give them a bigger promise of safety than alone in a courtyard with two hunters.  As she pulled poor Nicole along, who probably felt more confused than anything, she breathed out what she had been thinking, trying to fill her in the best she could.  “I think…  I think Andy’s a hunter”, she muttered, not willing to gaze toward her girlfriend to gauge her response.

First, Nicole watched the tree go up in flames, then the man visibly struggled with whatever was being done to him. She knew better than to reach out, even if she wished to place a supportive hand on Leah's shoulder (knowing the toll it took on her), for fear of ruining her focus. She could feel the heat emanating from her even a couple of feet away. The distraction worked, Andy was able to flip them, getting the upper hand. Nicole almost stepped in, feeling steady enough to try and help pinning the man down, but fingertips wrapped around her pulse point, hot and insistent. She was being pulled away, and— only because it was Leah, she followed. Several questions died in her throat. She wouldn’t do this without a good reason. She probably put something together Nicole couldn't see yet. 

They ran aimlessly, until the two were back to blending with the artwalk crowd, and Nicole came to a stop. She pulled Leah into an embrace, feeling her own limbs tremble as they gingerly wrapped around the smaller frame. “You did good, you did— thank you…” she gasped, cheek brushing against Leah’s hairline. Apologies built up in her throat, a painful knot she couldn’t swallow. She wished to excuse her own inability to measure up to the circumstances (for the second time in her life). Not only had she failed to do anything, really, she’d forced Leah to put her abilities on display, making herself more of a target. Fear wrapped around her ribcage even before horrible scenarios could form in her head. What if he came back for Leah? 

Her anxiety jumped back to Andy, who was currently dealing with that dangerous man. She wanted to ask about her, convince Leah to go back. Andy was strong but not defeat a hunter strong, right? But before she could string the proper sentences, Leah revealed what she had put together before her. Nicole loosened the hold she had on her girlfriend, head turning back to where they came from. Failing to process the information, trying to find ways to refute Leah’s claim. Why would a hunter befriend them? Why would Andy spend so many hours hiking with her, just the two of them in the immensity of the forest and not make a move?  A sting that felt close to betrayal flared in her chest. 

But despite the shitty feeling she was experiencing, and the shock she still couldn’t quite shake (her legs still not solid enough), Nicole wanted to go back, check if Andy was alright. Couldn’t entertain the idea that she might not be worth going back for. That their friendship had been a guise for something else. A means to an end. What end? She had no clue. Are you sure? She almost asked, but knew better than that. Leah wouldn’t have left a friend behind for a mere hunch. Her knuckles traced Leah’s jawline, trying to get her attention, searching for her eyes.  “We should go, then. More like them could be waiting to attack”.

Andy dropped next to the hunter, holding him down as best as she could, fearful that he might try and lunge after the two. 

However, they ran, just as Andy had instructed. The hunter struggled beneath her hold, but she didn’t dare let go. Letting go would provide access to them, and even though she couldn’t hear their retreating footsteps any longer, she didn’t want to take any chances. 

She didn’t want to focus on the way recognition had flitted over Leah’s features, or the confusion in Nicole’s expression. She wanted to get this guy as far away as possible, but how did she do that? He was clearly incapacitated by whatever Leah had done, but there was only a matter of time before he recovered. The hunter groaned, obscenities slurring from him as he wriggled beneath Andy’s grip. She felt stiff— out of her body, almost. She had run with Alex for so long that this was a slap in the face. Had it all been for nothing? 

Andy was only half-listening to the way that the hunter pointed out her flaws. She gave him a half-hearted nod before getting him to his feet. She’d get him far away from here, and then she would deal with the aftermath. The fear she’d felt when he’d been on top of Nicole had struck her down, but she needed to make it right now. He wouldn’t hurt anyone else, not as long as she was around. She would make sure of that.

[titleknown]

KAIJUNE NEO: LUMPY GRAVY

I saw it through the sewer grate. It ate them, head-first. Like a gingerbread man.

It didn't see me, I don't even think it knew it was eating them. It was just... they were there, they were there and it was hungry. It smelled like rotten meat. But that wasn't the worst part.

The worst part was, I could hear laughing. I could hear it in my head. I could hear it in their voices.

-Alan Smith of New York, New York

[Note: The interview subject is smoking a large cigar the whole time. Indoors. In a room with minimal ventilation in the summer. I hate him already.]

My concrete factory... just fucking gone. In an instant. Didn't even get indigestion...

...You know, this wouldn't have happened if you listened to the Prophet. Like, I know it's not "PC" to say that , but PC is why this country is in the shit. People want more, except the truth, that's why things like that're runnin' about.

That Lumpy Gravy shit's just another lazy slacker who wanted more, that's why our troops can't get him, they let the sissies let everyone down. But the prophet's gonna take 'em, he's goinna kill two birds with one stone, it's not clean, but sometimes you work with what you have. "When all you have is a hammer," amirite?

God, at least it got rid of the scum, like the homeless outside. Shame it didn't get that skitzo boy of mine, he keeps saying he's a girl, but I suppose that's not PC to-

[The interview ends abruptly as I get up to punch him in the face.]

--J.A. Henderson of Mortoral, Florida, who should be shot.

Look, I'm just a musician, I don't know what to tell you.

Yeah, I know most of y'all think I'm crazy for making a pilgrimage to this dude for music, but I mean, it worked, didn't it?

Nobody got hurt, me and the band got out a number one album, first doom metal album on the top of the charts in years, I got a million more ideas, and...

Sorry, I got that schpiel for every media-type who comes in here. But you don't seem like the judging type. So it seems like you want something else, right?

Oh. Oh you want to know about that , the song I heard. Well, trade secret bro...

...nah, just joshin' ya, free culture and all. Well it was... a nightmare. Like, I don't regret going there, but I ain't gonna see it twice.

It's like, imagine the sound of pain, a million snuff films in your head clear as day without image or without words. A lot of it was devouring, consumption, digestion, memory as I heard it; but there was some other stuff.

It was like, experiments, reformatting, failure, revenge, something about a demiurge I think? Dunno what that's about. But, hey dude, you're a good reporter, you can figure it out.

-Jolene Gross of Tucson; Arizona, note to see her live one of these days.

Well, the government never helped us, but then again we expected that. Shame the farm's gone. Heh, funny how stockpiling all the guns in the world never helped, like cannonballs in a hurricane. The MREs helped a bit, tho they were almost gone when the thing left.

Farm's gone, I don't know where we're going to go. Doesn't help I took in some of the kids run away from other monsters, or The Prophet. Yeesh, that guy.

But, you always gotta help in a time like this, I don't regret it. Tho it's a mite harrowing finding where we can get some, given all the neighbors I'd ask are facing the same problem, but we'll get by.

I don't have much to give except my testimony, and that ain't much either. I saw it, I heard it, it was the worst thing I've seen. But it reminded me a lot of the second-worst too.

At the pig farms, big operation near town, there was this "lagoon." Not much of a swimmin' lagoon unless you got a death wish. It's where they kept all the pig shit from that hell operation, and worse. They said the stillbirths went in there too. What a way to start, and what a way to go.

Place could necrotize your skin in an instant, most of the people workin there were sick and some degree of half-dead, a few quarter-dead if they were lucky. Sometimes you couldn't see the sun from that sheer fog.

There's that ol story in the bible, where Jesus cast out those demons into that herd of pigs. Cast 'em into that sea. Trouble is, the sea's still there, and if you cast demons into it, it don't go away.

And when it waded into that shit lagoon from underground, rising like the shit of king mountain, when I heard those voices, I thought, it's him. It's Legion. He's back.

Well, before I ran, of course...

-Jim Daniels, of Horsemouth, Iowa, his paypal information is linked at the end of the article

Sometimes, I still hear her voice. It's following me. I think it's following me. I hear her voice and it's screaming in pain but I still hear it it is hers.

I know it's a trick i know it wants me to hear it but shes still in there i can hear her i can know her it just has to eat me it just wants to eat me i dont want to be eaten i want to live but to live without her is to die and to die with her is to live it hurts i can hear her i can hear her i can hear her

-Ray Morris, who ran out of the office after sobbing for several minutes

Like, I know, I know it's horrible, it's an atrocity, but like, business has been great for me so far.

Do you know how much money there is in arranging death pacts? Tontines? Insurance schemes because they won't insure an act of God? This mountain of human suffering is a goldmine, like an actual goldmine without the imperialism!

Look, I'm just providing a service to people who need it, there's no foul play. Well, except for that one guy. But he had it coming, if you were there you'd know.

-Caroline Nacross, allegedly of Brass Ring; North Dakota, though the ID was confirmed fake later

Look, okay, just forget my name, forget my face, but tell my story. This was a fuckup of the highest order. The Brightside project, it almost got results. More the results of what that bastard scientist wanted than what we wanted, but those two were closer than we wanted to admit.

But when that kid broke in, and good on him for doing so, it wasn't just Brightside that got out. We tested on a lot of bodies y'see. I can't call 'em people anymore because... well, I couldn't live with myself if I did. They didn't even look much like people anymore after what he did to 'em.

We didn't sterilize 'em or burn leftovers, we just kept 'em for "future experimentation." I don't think most of the other folks there wanted that, but whatever the boss says goes.

I think he wanted this, if he couldn't pull it off. I think if he couldn't make god, then making the locusts and plagues was good enough, in an interim.

Or, maybe it's worse. He doesn't want a devil to kill us. He wants a Leviathan. A beast of his principles of rule, human minds supplanted E Pluribus Unum, and soon, those other... monsters? Gods? I am unsure of the difference anymore

That bastard has plans upon plans, you gotta watch out for. Because I don't wanna watch anymore. Goodbye.

-[ANONYMOUS] who promptly after finishing Budd Dwyer-ed himself in the interview room. It was hell to get the brains off the wall.

WE ARE HERE. WE ARE ALIVE. WE ARE THE DEAD. WE HATE YOU. WE LOVE YOU. WE ARE HERE.

DO NOT PANIC. IT IS NOT THE END OF THE WORLD. PANIC. IT IS THE BEGINNING OF A NEW NIGHTMARE. WE ARE HERE.

WE ARE WE. WE ARE ONE. WE ARE THE OTHERS. WE ARE REBORN. WE ARE STILLBORN. YOUR DEATH WILL NOT BE IN VEIN. YOUR DEATH WILL BE IN PAIN.

THE OLD WORLD IS DYING. THE NEW WORLD IS WAITING TO BE REBORN. NOW IS THE TIME OF GODS. NOW IS THE TIME OF MONSTERS.

-Unknown individual, who promptly melted into a steaming puddle in the office. I dried the sludge and attempted to smoke it. Bad trip. Do not recommend. Saved some for later.

[INTERVIEWS CONDUCTED BY: D.W. DEVLIN]

-----------------------------

So, the finale of Kaijune comes to a close! Song name was based on "Theme from Lumpy Gravy" from Frank Zappa, and boy was this guy a nightmare to make.

Like, he was just a blob of foam with tentacles, but then the tentacles became a nightmare to make, and then melting globs of hot glue without a hot glue gun to give him a blobbier texture, then all the epoxy putty and epoxy paste, all the painting, and lugging him around...

Like, he's part of why this didn't debut in August, he was a late addition, and one I slightly regret.

Tho, I will add as a bit of bonus trivia, the inspiration for The Prophet was actually someone I know in another server talking about how various fundie-types who call themselves "prophets" on Youtube have ended up pumping a ridiculous variety of conspiracy theories into his mom's head.

For an idea of how bonkers those are, one of them was about how the increased presence of mermaids and "sea people" in media was a sign of demonic influence because demons apparently live in the deep sea.

So, I got the idea of coming up with somebody who took that to the next level and used that to amass power in times of even greater crisis than our own. hence, that fucker.

Who I do have plans for next year's Kaijune about, yes siree...

Ability Trivia: Along with all the powers of being an amorphous blob (Albeit, they can only fully squeeze themself through holes his giant skull-like "core" can fit through") they have the demonstrated power to send psychic signals to not just people in a way that drives them mad, but even disrupts communications. So nobody can hear you call for help.

They also, as you've seen assimilate the consciousnesses of those they devour, and can make what passes as "plans" as a consensus of the maddened, pained minds within. And, along with being able to electrify their amorphous surface, they can also use their body as a low-level railgun with all the derbris they inevitably swallow in the course of their rampages

And, then of course there's the matter of the "separants"...

Bonus Trivia: Most kaiju hate him and attack him on sight. Not that he minds. They'll all come to him eventually. Or they won't. Either way doesn't matter, as long as there's a head at the top of the Leviathan...

...And, in that grand (exceedingly late) Kaijune tradition, this character and all related narrative elements are under a CC-BY 4.0 license, as long as I, Thomas F Johnson, am credited as their creator.

Have fun, and see you next year! 

[greypetrel]

1 and 9 for all of them!

Hi Mo! :D

Thanks for asking! A premise for number 9: I firmly believe that there's something of the author in every character, so I'll just listen what they got from me.

Tis the prompt list

1. What was the first element of your OC that you remember considering (name, appearance, backstory, etc.)? 

Alyra: as above, time has passed and I don't remember much. I recovered her character because I liked the way she looked. I think it was the race, I remember I spent A LONG TIME back them deciding on the background. Raina: Her class. I didn't want to play another rogue, but then I remembered my one failing try with a mage in DAO and the Warrior armor wasn't as pretty as the rogue one. (she was born in trash and kept living in it.) Garrett: "Ok, I want to try the Fenris romance WITH A BLOOD MAGE." (sorry Fenris.)(But it worked out so there's that? They're happy growing pumpkins now) Aisling: "I want another Dalish whose character is the opposite of Alyra, this time.". Basically, I decided she would be a cinnamon roll first. Radha: The Dirthamen vallaslin. it looks very cool. Also, since my characters tend to be chatty, I wanted one that on the contrary speaks very, VERY little. Max: The name! I wanted a masculine nickname that's short for something quite embarrassing for the character. Hence she's named Maxine. She'll say it's a dog name and she hates it, but that nonetheless she got lucky because grandpa wanted to name her Jolene and that reference is too much on the nose.

9. Are they based off of you, in some way? 

Alyra: I was told I can be indimidating when I am pissed off, but I don't think I reach her levels, LOL. I do blink. Raina: She won the lottery as the character I do the most self-inserts. Beside the family, she won the lottery of sarcasm and being a mental wreck with zero self-esteem and a good façade of one. I don't eat stuff off the ground tho, I swear. Garrett: Surely not the green thumb nor the love for pumpkins. I'm chill like him. Aisling: "I'm fine :) " said as I'm having an anxiety attack. Being chatty and unable to hold a poker face. I would like to say I'm not a horse girl, but my instagram feed thinks otherwise. Radha: The love for reading and catching on, and vaguely the "no shit taken" attitude. Max: She got my taste for oldies and '80s rock, and well. Being Italian.

[itgetsrad]

NOW COME GET EVERYTHING YOU CAME FOR

[my thoughts on Cowboy Carter]

TEXAS HOLD EM is really really good and somehow gets better every time i hear it. a perfect lead single

"now come get everything you came for" is the hardest lyric i've heard in a long time. it goes so fucking hard

i really like SPAGHETTII but it feels strange on this album and i wish it was longer with out the 'genre' opening. i need a remix real quick

PROTECTOR is prob my fave right now

AMERICAN REQUIEM - TEXAS HOLD EM is pretty perfect. 16 CARRIAGES had to grow on me but it has

not super into the whole radio show interludes - it just kind of feels like an attempt to solidify the album the way RENAISSANCE did effortlessly. it seems forced to me. a lot of the album seems 'forced' to me which is why i'm not sure i like it much

i really hate RIIVERDANCE a lot. i have not like actively disliked a Beyoncé song since 4 but here we go

i admittedly don't know who Willie Jones is but i do not like his voice on JUST FOR FUN

i want to like BODYGUARD but it sounds corny to me

when i say "corny" i think i mean like a generic pop/country song and like ... Beyoncé is not generic. you can like or hate her music but for almost a decade now she has been making music that always sounds technically perfect (the production value) and pushes boundaries into new territory & at the very least does not sound like anyone else. so to hear songs like BODYGUARD, DAUGHTER, ALLIIGATOR TEARS, LEVII'S JEANS that just feel and sound like they could easily just be on some other pop artist's albums is just really strange and disappointing

LEVII'S JEANS is not good

i know i'm being pretty negative but another thing is how a lot of the songs feel almost there - like YA YA or even AMERICAN REQUIEM - something about them just don't feel like a finished Beyoncé song to me. i can't even put my finger on what it is exactly

YA YA is going to be so fun live tho

i wish MY ROSE and OH LOUISIANNA were longer

DESSERT EAGLE needs a remix w/ 3stacks and Big Boi

II MOST WANTED is so damn good - love Miley and love her on this

kind of bummed that The Chicks aren't on the album, ngl. or at least Natalie. seems like a missed opportunity

II HANDS II HEAVEN is great

TYRANT slaps

not sure how i'll feel after continued listens but for now there are a bunch of skips for me that i don't think will grow on me & that's really shocking to me

i guess i have to talk about JOLENE - i have never really liked this song regardless of who sings it. it's a fine song but yeah i've never liked it as much as everyone else seems to so i'm not inclined to listen to Bey version either - don't @ me

[radgalniya]

cowboy carter album review:

this album has so much context i know i’m missing so i’m not going to talk too much about the themes or lyrical backgrounds and just focus on the music. beyonce knows she wrong for not adding liner notes to this album but i digress. also the ratings are on how much i like the song NOT on how good they are because artistically every song is pretty perfect. such high quality and artistry, no shock there.

american requiem: 6/10

love the beyonce choir. makes me wanna go join a civil rights march idk lmao. probably will only listen to this one on a full album listen tho.

blackbird: 8/10

i wish we got more of the other singers singing the main lines rather than mostly just the background, but i still like it. reminds me of butterfly fly away from the hannah montana movie. not my favorite but i’ll come back when i wanna feel like someone’s singing me a sweet lullaby or when i’m maladaptive daydreaming that i’m sitting around a campfire on a beach in an old southern town singing tunes.

16 carriages: 10/10

iiiiiiiii love this song. so much. since it’s been released, i’ve been listening to it non stop. it’s so beautiful and perfect. one of my absolute favorites. what a single. it’s perfect.

protector: 7/10

the acutal lullaby song. so pretty. so soft. so sweet. i like it.

my rose: 4/10

what rose are we talking about beyonce lmao no but anyway this is too short like i hate mini songs pls. but eh i’m not feeling it anyway.

smoke hour willie nelson: n/a

texas hold em: 10/10

so fun, so catchy, the rhythm in this one is so infectious. “this beat is vivacious”. i love every melody in this song. the slowdown is insaneeee. her ability to blend genres in a way that’s actually interesting and unique issss ugh amazing love her.

bodyguard: 10/10

as soon as the song started, i texted my best friend telling her i loved it. i knew from the first beat. this song is so perfect. i could listen to this forever and never get sick of it. i loooooove it. shoulda been a single imo

dolly p: 10/10

okay ik this is just an interlude but the jolene instrumental sounds sooo beautiful in this and the “jolene” sample thing i love it. plus dolly. this isnt even a song but i want more of it.

jolene: 8/10

okay idk how i feel about this cover. i dont like the lyrical changes. it does feel more beyonce than the original but i liked how dolly never put down or shamed jolene. i like the vulnerability and softness in the original. i dont like the harsher approach in this one. HOWEVER if this song was softer like the interlude OR the choir at the end for the whole song, it’d be a 10/10 for me. i’m actually so mad the choir part was so short bc i loooove it.

daughter: 7/10

i’d relisten but probably not as often. it’s beautiful but idk it just doesnt catch me. the opera at the end is beautiful. and the song is so nice. but it’s just not my favorite.

spaghetti: 7/10

controversial opinion but i dont usually like rapyonce. i like beyonce singing on a rap beat but rapping idk. makes me cringe. the more i listen tho, the more i like it. again i do love how she blends genres in this so flawlessly. the ending is my favorite part of the song, so nice also i love the beat.

alligator tears: 6/10

i don’t care to listen to this one again tbh. doesn’t really catch my attention. i like the outro tho. idk y she always makes the outros outros and not just the song.

smoke hour ii: n/a

just for fun: 6/10

will relisten but not my favorite.

most wanted: 10/10

never thought i’d get a miley cyrus/beyonce collab but im so grateful i’m obsessssseedddd. i looooove it. it’s so beautiful. so romantic. perfect in my eyes.

levii’s jeans: 10/10

i hate post malone and i’m mad beyonce chose to work w him rather than idk a black female artist. you let this nigga sing a whole verse but barely let the other black country female singers on blackbird get in a line??? idgi. but goddamit i love the song. so romantic in a kind of sensual way with the country twang. one of my favorites. i cant even be too mad. he ate his part up.

flamenco: 8/10

i love the flamenco in this lol. it’s too short tho ugh i hate mini songsss. idk it’s somehow not my favorite. flamenco and beyonce sounds perfect but this song didnt really catch me as much as id like it to. still like it tho and will relisten.

the linda martell show: n/a

ya ya: 9/10

love the 60s black southern rocker vibes in this. the instrumental is so insane i’m obsessed. so fun, so dancey. you cant not dance to this. and her vocals remind me so much of tina turner.

oh louisiana: 7/10

i actually like this even tho it’s just like an interlude. not much to say about it tho.

desert eagle: 9/10

that BASS?!?! absolutely thank u. too goddamn short!!! like i wish there was more to it. more everything.

riiverdance: 9/10

that banjo(?) lick is so addictive. another fun dancey song. again, love the genre bending. i like this, will relisten. i kept waiting for like a climax tho? idk. i wish there was one.

ii hands ii heaven: 6/10

not my favorite, probably wont relisten to very often.

tyrant: 9/10

another genre bender. i really like it. the chorus is so good and addictive. “i dont like to sit up in the saddle boy i got this” YEA!

sweet honey buckiin: 7/10

genre bender lmao i’m gettin repetitive i know. i just get what she means now by saying this isnt a country album, it’s a beyonce album. not my favorite but i like it some. will relisten from time to time.

amen: 8/10

love a beyonce choir.

overall even tho every song wasnt a hit for me, the songs i love, i love so much that it makes this album a 10/10 for me. they’re so interesting and unique but still melodic and catchy and i loooove it.

[minetteskvareninova]

Minette watches Medici, part 12 (Blood With Blood)

- I see the titles aren’t getting better... Then again, appropriate considering it’s an unofficial Twilight crossover. Yes, I know Volterra is a real city that just happened to be used by Stephenie Meyer as a seat of dark!Aziraphale and his possey. No, this does not ruin my unhinged headcannons in the slightest.

- The main plot of this episode was... A lot. For starters, rejoice, people, Lorenzo de’ Medici finally lost! Granted, it was because he is such a good boy who wouldn’t hurt a fly, but oh well. For real tho, Lorenzo’s actions having realistic (and tragic) consequences was pretty compelling. I completely understand Clarice’s need to give him a reassurance, however weak, and a hug. Hell, by the end of the episode, I wanted to give him a hug! Which is really saying something considering how little sympathy I felt for him before.

- On the other hand, the fact that Lorenzo is such a good boy who wouldn’t hurt a fly kinda makes his friendship with a violent thug like Francesco de’ Pazzi more confusing. Or vice versa, for that matter. Really, Francesco’s turn to the Medici side is justified not at all, and the stupid flashback whose only purpose seems to be to point at old Pazzi and go “look at this asshole, don’t you just hate him so much?” absolutely doesn’t help. Honestly if anything, it makes me hate the writers, not the old Pazzi. This douche really is what I was affraid Albizzi would end up being.

- On the OTHER other hand, however contrived the reasoning behind it was, I still liked to actually see them work together. Why, yes, Italian Ao3, they are pretty shippable. Man, can you believe this mess is the best subplot in this episode?!

- Francesco’s romance with Novella is nice in theory, but the little time alotted to it and Novella’s piss-poor acting kinda ruin in. Again, can you believe this mess is the best romantic subplot in this episode?! Well, that and me x Bianca’s wedding dress.

- Clarice/Lorenzo/Lucrezia D love triangle absolutely does not live up to its potential here, aside from Clarice’s Jolene moment, which I do appreciate, because I am fair like that. And maybe I am foolish, but I still want it to continue somehow, if for no other reason, then because I sincerely hope the writers do not expect us to believe Clarice’s limp comforting of Lorenzo was enough to turn him away from Lucrezia D.

- Giuliano officially earns the medal of the worst boy of this show, because what the fuck was that subplot?! Again, tsundere girl x presumptuous fuckboy is truly the inferior trope, and Giuliano truly is the worst of the fuckboys. Like, of course he had to undress in front of Simonetta for her to feel anything but disdain; like, there is just absolutely nothing good about this dude except his abs! Even then, he in turn doesn’t have Francesco’s cheekbones. Novella truly dodged a bullet here. Human mind cannot comprehend why would Simonetta feel literally anything when confronted with the possibility of Giuliano’s death, other than “huh, a waste of good abs”. Which could work as a motivation to fuck him after he comes from the battle, but I somehow doubt that’s what the writers had in mind.

- For what its worth, I appreciated the relatively realistic image of Early Modern warfare. Even the whole thing where the Florentine commander ordered an attack on a walled city because siege lasting a FEW DAYS would be too long for him could be explained by the dude being on Pazzi’s payroll or something.

[munsontm]

📂📂📂📂📂📂

Send “📂“ for a random yet completely useless headcanon I have / ACCEPTING / @musecraft & @harringtontm

One of the first real gifts Eddie got was a pair of Star Wars jammies with Han and Chewie on them from Wayne for his thirteenth birthday. Eddie was so obsessed with them that even once he had grown out of them. He turned the top into a crop top to wear for a while.

Eddie spent most of his youth being a basic food person due to financial constraints. But as he gets older he develops a love of Italian food and Japanese food once he lives in LA. Not sushi tho. He hates it.

Despite being a metal boy through and through. He can belt out a seriously good performance of Jolene.

Eddie loves the smell of artificial bubblegum. He doesn't know why, but thinks it's something to do with his mother.

He's extremely ticklish and if he thinks someone is moving in for a tickle. He'll run a mile. It's one of the few things that can get him running lmao. Why? He literally laughs like a tiny girl when being tickled specifically.

One time he wore Steve's jeans to the mall and forgot to put a belt on, so he was hiking them up constantly. They finally fell down in the middle or Sears, and he didn't even notice right away.