#hahah got you again
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What’s wrong? :(
(@director-bridger)
I am just so alone but I don’t care I like being alone my last post was a joke I’m not sad hahahahahaa thanks for being concerned though roman 😸
#hahahaha yeahh#why does nobody in this town like me#just kidding bro haha#seriously though#hahah got you again#yeah..#randy meeks#scream rp
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CLOSETS. WOMEN. WOMEN IN CLOSETS.
Also Suitor Armor Fans hOW WE FEELING?!?!??!?
#Nevermore#Nevermore Webtoon#Webtoon#What a fun lil ep#Fun to see Nurse Dolly again I love doing her stern voice and she’s fed up with everything all the time#Sir were you listening to the instructions#Sir you can’t like do anything come on now it hasn’t even been like two hours since you were stabbed beat hit punched slashed#Yes Prospero whip some sense into him#Ada omg you’re smitten still#I wonder if those names are random or we’ll like see them#I wonder if one of them is the girl we saw in 54#Anyway you got her mad now#Ok Will that’s a pretty volcanic-hot take#Voicing Montresor was kinda fun bc I was kinda tired too and him nodding off came very naturally hahah#Prospero doesn’t hate women good move#AND OMG ANNABEL IN THE CLOSET#LENORE LOOK AT WHAT YOU DID TO YOUR GF SHE’S SO SADDDDD#Well maybe not lenore did that duke and pluto mainly. but still she kinda rejected her before#IN THE CLOSETTTTTT#If next episode is like that one scene in 71 but for a whole episode I’m gonna be so happy#That scene is kinda everything for the posh besties#Funny how this ep is kinda comforting like how Shiloh: 101 is too I freaking love Shiloh: 101#ANYWAY NEVERMOREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE#ALSO LUCIA AND MODEUS FOREVERRRRRRRRR THE MUSIC WAS CUTE
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they should have left august have genuine feelings for day imo like we already saw him kinda disappointed it was not a date with mork... the whole kiss thing felt so wrong they did day (and august too tbh) dirty
to start off, thank you for indulging me with a ltts message 🥰 also I hope this isn't too long, i havent had the time to seriously think about this episode so this is my chance 💓
throughout the episode I began wondering if august was a legitimate contender and the thought bothered me for a few reasons: i had been under the impression the plot isn't really about that; that there would be no space to fit in a love triangle of this size if other conflicts were to be explored and resolved. basically that mork and day would have enough on their plate without august in the picture and focusing on those two would only slow down the development of the main couple. I did find the thought of august's intentions being serious intriguing though, a bit frustrating, yes, but also interesting.
now, I had a bit of trouble understanding your point but im guessing you mean we already saw that day was disappointed the party wasn't a date so we're aware of his feelings and they are not aimed at august anymore? so it wouldn't have been an issue if august just continued liking day because day doesn't like him that way anymore, right? because I get that, it wouldn't have been the first time that's happened on screen haha but also that's exactly why I'm not that fond of the idea. day and august having a mutual crush and that going for a few episodes? THAT I find intriguing, an actual relationship trying to figure itself out while it's doomed by the narrative because it isn't the main romance.
but august having actual romantic feelings for day and stepping aside (because the show wants this couple dealt with by the end of the first half, apparently, and it would have cut him off somehow) would be something both sad and also, in my humble opinion, redundant. I've seen it before, it's just a bummer for everyone involved and I don't need it here.
what the plot actually did was very nice, as weird as it sounds. it gave us a character who loves his mate a lot. I do not doubt that august has strong feelings for day. everyone is pissed at him at the moment, day is hurt because there was pity, mork is angry because there was lack of consideration but that boy cares for day, a lot. i suppose there are feelings of guilt, they were on the court together when day lost his vision and then he didn't contact august for over a year. august probably felt some sort if personal responsibility for day's condition or for his behaviour towards him while they were partners, for the fact day felt he couldn't tell him the truth. so there is guilt and there is pity but also there is affection for a friend, for a partner, for the person alongside which you aimed for your dreams. they have a bond (and im sure people have expressed a lot about their sync and dynamic that I haven't picked up on but a bond is undeniable).
august tried to be a better person, a warm one, someone day doesn't recognise. he tried to be everything he wasn't before because thats what he decided day wants and needs. the night at the bar he was already feeling bad about leaving day to hang. on a side note, while the episode was airing i ran to check whether the cast was there that night and if it was on the same arm. it was. august didnt lie and im paranoid lmao anyways
the scene was crushing for mork and us, sure, but it was also very hard for august. he had had an accident, he couldn't contact day and still went as soon as he could after midnight. when he heard the confession he ran which honestly felt like an appropriate reaction - indicating he was there would make day embarrassed and pretending to come in later also wouldn't work because his partner who recently came back into his life with shocking news after ghosting him for a year suddenly confessed he's in love with him. while he's exhausted and hurt. of course the kid needed time to process what the fuck is going on! and he came back the very next morning, ready to make things right.
the issue stems from the fact he had no clue what right is, his underdeveloped brain told him to be a better friend than before but it went too far off in the direction of that thought and landed at "be what he wants you to be to a T" which includes, well, a romantic interest. and that's just not something you can force but alas, earnest, stupid august tried to check off everything on the "make day happy" list.
that boy ran off crying (I would too if mork glared at me like a maddog but still) because he kissed and got kissed by someone he didn't want such contact with ( the reciprocated kiss was A Lot for him) and then realised he'd hurt the person he wanted to satisfy in every way. his words indicate he didn't intend the kiss to be just one, that he wanted to actively change the way he feels about day, that he considered being his boyfriend. I figure he truly realised that was not an option while the kiss was happening hence why the second one had him running away again.
we know august is impulsive and earnest, his intentions were coming from a good place but he couldn't plan to save his life. he acts with his heart and so he was relying on falling for day till the end with no backup plan. it's either that or he knew before the kiss and intended it to be a single gift and I can't tell which is worse. in any case he was aware of the big possibility him and days weren't going to work out so his actions were majorly irresponsible.
the kiss had me screaming NOO literally and then the second one nearly had me gripping my hair, idek what sounds I made from the beginning till the end of that scene but "felt wrong" is something I can understand though it didd feel wrong but maybe not in the way you mean?
i didn't know nor suspect august's intentions and thought process so the kiss felt real to me and though I was against it as an avid morkday shipper, I didn't think that narratively it was bad. day was done dirty a 100% (though he gets mork acting on his feelings finally so..glass half full..?). let's not forget that mork actively supported day's perception of the situation as flirting - not his fault, that's what august was doing after all - but it's something that made the fall that much worse. day was getting hyped up by mork the way he was by gee ABOUT mork before that. he gets affected by his friends' opinions because he relies on them to read the other's body language and intentions. so there is this feeling of helplessness not only because of the pity that guided august's actions but the fact he couldn't assess the situation himself. so yes, for this and many other reasons, day was done dirty by every definition of the phrase.
but as for august and the plot I'm not so sure. august as a character is, to me, much more interesting as this confused and, frankly, unintelligent young man whose heart seems to be in the right place..? but whose actions are totally misguided than if he were, let's say, a good guy finally acting on his crush after years. I suppose he could've stopped before the kiss and told day the truth and maybe day would be a bit disappointed but definitely more forgiving and less heartbroken..
but then how would we see that day can help mork tame his anger with just a touch of the hand? and we needed an act so grotesque that would lead them to have a conversation that makes mork want to scream "I do not pity you, I haven't pitied you for a second, you are so strong and smart and loveable, i love you, how could you ever focus on a nobody like him when you are everything, you deserve so much more, how could you not know that, why did i ever let him near you, i should have never allowed for this to happen, i love you so much god I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU" (yes thats what those eyes at the rooftop said, idk what yall heard.)
i believe the charm of this scene and this whole conflict is that no one there is acting out of malice. it's just people doing what they think is right. mork stepping aside was not the right move technically but it fits his character and the plot as well. imo august wasn't done dirty, he was made interesting and also he isn't a bad guy. he did some really harmful shit but by the end of the scene i didn't feel an ounce of malice from him. there could still be love between the two but one that's not based around day walking on eggshells and one that doesn't rely on august to be something he is not. when they arent forced by the outside to be in close proximity and make things work, when they can just tease each other comfortably without taking all of the other's happiness and well-being as their own responsibility, thats when they could have a nice casual friendship with a lot of appreciation for the other. i believe him and day would reconcile at some point in the future when day is ready to forgive and august is ready to stop running.
#this turned into an august defense essay huh#last twilight#ltts#morkday#im sorry if i sound too..whats the word defiant? like i am hardly against your points#i think they are very valid in the sense that we all have dofferent views of our beloved characters and we want different things from shows#truth of the matter is that if the story went the way you envisioned it i probably would still like it! im just satisfied with what we got#i say im tired and then write for like an hour jesus#thank you for this again <33 hope its comprehensible im not checking hahah
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it's hackathon week next week and there are so many things i need to do (passport renewal, accommodation stuff, dental appointments, packing for flight, chores, etc), so i apologize if i'm kind of inactive or off in this blog or discord!!
#rin rambles#cw vent#tw vent#i'm ngl i'm starting to stress out haha#eating is such a pain sometimes i wish they invent a pill you can just take and it'll give you all the exact nutrients you need ugh#i keep forgetting to have dinner for the past 4 days n haven't had the energy to wash my hair for 3 days now#but it's fine we good we're chugging on#i'll hopefully have some time to breathe on the weekend since monday is a ph#but my god i'm dreading the hackathon sm haha#mostly bc i have never talked to the people assigned into the team with me AND everyone is in US timezone#so i have to stay up late from night to morning to collab with them#and i really don't like that haha but what can you do when it's work :))))#and then there's the new landlady's shenanigans...... i dont want to think about it.............#lets try not to get your paranoia make you break down again meirin#anyway#that got venty real fast i better put a warning#sorry for the negativity lately i'm just so tired#venty............. venti......... hey guys what do you call it when venti vents- /smacked#there now that wasnt all negative hahah
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well. happy new year then, i guess. genuinely don't recall ever being this unexcited on a new year's eve skljdfhs i guess 2023 really took it out of me somehow but. here's to 2024, i'm excited to spend it in this fandom and with this wonderful community <3
#2024#happy new year#literally only got up to kiss my partner who is equally non excited#and get a chocolate pudding#and sat back down again to continue drawing hahah#at least you can't go wrong with chocolate#that's a good start#personal
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hahaha hey you guys guess what. you'll never believe it. got the guy who's in charge of my fraud case on the phone and he was like "who'd you give one-time security codes to yesterday" and i was like "the guy who called me from the fraud department after they noticed a weird login in florida??" and he was like "that was the fuckin hacker. you got got. IDIOT!!!!!!!!!!" i handed my entire savings over to a fucking guy on the phone on a silver platter. like some kind of fuckin rube. bro
#IT IS OK THOUGH I HAVE BEEN SORTING IT OUT#account is LOCKED DOWN! card is DELETED! fraud paperwork has been FILED! i have requested a fraud alert AND credit freeze#from the NATIONAL CREDIT BUREAU!#a friend of mine is taking me to MAINE next saturday to go to the BANK! i sent an email to my landlord asking if i can pay rent by CHECK!#i went to my other bank and deposited my BONDS! so i have some MONEY! to pay RENT!#i also got a new debit card from them. and made sure i could use my old checks.#i also bought some STAMPS while i was out and a BIRTHDAY PRESENT for a FRIEND#now i am going to start switching over some auto deposits#so when i get my paycheck on tuesday i will actually get it.#i feel so STUPID but i think i have done all i can to fix this. i am feeling better about it#by next weekend i will have my money again. it's all fine#and hopefully next time i will not get got so easily. lol.#anyway dont get got by people pretending to be your bank i guess. i did think it was weird how many questions they asked but..#they ALWAYS ask lots of questions at the bank!!!!!#i got a text message FROM the bank saying they would be calling me soon and then the next call was from the scammer#and then like a half hour later got one from the bank and was confused bc they'd just 'called me'#anyway. it'll be fine. scary for a while but at least i have things i can do to make it better. it's all good#genuinely feeling like i ought to take out like a thousand bucks cash and keep it in my desk to replace my bonds tho tbh hahah#just in case something like this happens again. you never know. what would i have done if i DIDNT have those yknow#ok thank u all for being along on this journey with me
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it was wretched at the time but admittedly it is very funny that following a link pitched explicitly as 'hey, if you feel self conscious about your body, here's a whole gallery of Normal Women showcasing the incredible variety of perfectly healthy, normal bodies, so you can see that you're perfectly normal too💕' is how I found out that what I have is in fact a deformity
#me-- age 22 or whatever-- scrolling with increasing worry: huh... haha... none of these really look like me yet hahah... hm.. huh.....#[reaching the end where there is another link to a smaller gallery of examples of abnormal bodies] ................ s. surely not hahahh‚‚‚#WOMP WOMP#anyway I made peace and mostly got over it years ago so it's very stupid and annoying that the last couple of years have been Issues again#get over it!! whatever!!! you also wish you were shorter and had green eyes but too damn bad so just get over it!!!
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Another thing about Drayton that I've latched onto is his line about how 'you don't want to see me ugly cry' when you battle him. It makes me wonder how he'd cry exactly.
I'm torn between two types. One is that he's the sort to get really quiet when he cries. Just suppressing it full force, shoulders shaking and tears just sliding down his face. In private too cause it's not cool to be caught like that, and maybe he'd grab a pillow or something to muffle sobs but after like 5-10 mins, it's like a switch flipped. He calms down, washes his face and proceeds with his day normally. Sidesteps any and all questions about why his eyes look red rimmed and puffy.
Another is that he is an ugly crier. Just full on sobbing, snot and tears going down his face. Trying to wipe away but it just keeps coming. Kinda lashing out at people who try to get close or comfort him. He hates feeling this way, hates having others see him like this but it's just too much to pretend that he's fine right now. When he's calmed down, just rough scrubs to his face and then quick exit, ignoring people calling out to him.
Now what would make him cry like that is the big question haha
Oh bet he represses everything, and I mean every single thing lmfaoo
But I also imagine him being a mix of both in a way, like, he doesn't show it to anyone else ofc, he would never ever cry in public, that's so uncool in his words, but once he's alone it just,, it's a gradual thing, it builds up y'know, it's like the feeling of anxiety, where your chest feels tight and your throat feels dry and you can feel every nerve in your body almost pulsing just beneath your skin, and suddenly every little problem starts to pile up on him, until it reaches its peak and he just,,, tears up, tries to stop them, trying so hard, so hard he's trying so hard why can't they see that I'm trying and until he starts to really ugly cry, like, his chest hurts y'know, broken sobs echo within the room as he tries so hard to calm himself down, until his pokemon come out to try and calm him, until he lashes out on them, until he falls to his knees, falls to the floor, his Dragonite nuzzling close to him, hoping it's enough comfort without really hugging him, without having to risk him panicking again from being held too tight
And they wait for him y'know, wait till he's the one reaching out for them, wait till he's the one clinging to his pokemon, holding them tight, closer, impossibly closer, at least they won't leave him
Ofc, his process is still slow, after his tears were shed, he'd just,,, sit there or lie down and look up at the ceiling, letting the last remnants of his tears to fall before he takes a deep breath, let's it out, and sits upright again, chuckling to himself, saying shit like "well, that was something, huh?" And after he makes sure he looks presentable, he goes on his day as if he didn't just cry for almost thirty minutes
Low-key tho but other than being compared to his fam, I think his academic record would kinda haunt him, cause like yeah, he knows he's a strong trainer, he has no doubts with that, but he knows he's struggling w class and while he's so chill abt it, repeating his school year kinda messed with him a bit. Maybe that, and maybe the whispers abt him too ofc, how he knows other people doubt if he really wants to be a Dragon Master like Drayden and Iris, he is from a family of Dragon Masters, so why isn't he making more of an effort to become one? Idk but yeah hahaha
#speaking of i was supposed to post smth last night abt dray and iris too but i got so tired i forgot cbndnd#now i really forgot what its supposed to be lmfao#but damn tho w his cool kid persona he really gives off dave vibes hahah#idk its just that i know despite how he is he cares a bit too much but never ever shows it#bc emotions will only hurt you more yknow so he keeps it all in#idk i think that while hes good at hiding his emotions hes so shit at handling them#like w kieran he knows itd mess w kieran if he gets beaten again by the player#and how kieran doesnt like being called ex champ anymore as hes apologizing to drayton#but idk i think hed be the type to hold grudges bc yeah hes shit at handling emotions#he means well yknow its all fun and games for him#but sometimes payback is payback. and for him payback is fair#pokemon hcs#an ask and an answer#anon
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Happy Mother's Day!
To all the mother's out there on Simblr, I hope you have a beautiful day! To celebrate, I thought I'd share some of the new mothers that have popped up in my story/gameplay since the new infants showed up!
SimDonia Royal Family
Lillian, Alvin and their twins - Paola and Paolo! Their children's names were inspired by their honeymood trip to Monte Vista (where the twins were concieved lol). The happy family live in a beautiful Monte Vistan inspired Estate in Hallow Slough.
Rosalie, James, Stephanie, and James Jr! The family likes to enjoy a laid-back life and is not in the public eye too much because they're home enjoying their family! They live in a manor in Ophelia close to water so James can always be able to fish.
Katrina, Adam, their son, Thomas, adopted daughter, Stacy, Kara, and Katrina is pregnant with twins! Although they were the last to wed, they wasted no time expanding their family. The couple always wanted to adopt and have a big family. Soon, this family of 5 will be a family of 7! They live in a very eco-friendly estate with it's own farm.
The Wu/Kealoha Family
May, Mateo, their adopted son Evan, Mateo Jr. and Tyler! Mateo is a Sulani conservationist while May continues her career in interior design although she hasn't worked a lot since the boys came. Honestly, adjusting to being parents has been hard for them as they try to find their balance. May always wanted to adopt which she did and she also wanted to try for a girl, but the couple agreed that three is enough.
Eva, Tanner, their irish twins, Edgar and Allan their adopted daughter (Tanner's niece) Hannah! Also in Sulani, the couple live a hectic life! Starting with adopting Hannah after Tanner's sister passed away from narcotics. Soon after the couple found out they were pregnant, and then just 10 months later another bundle of joy joined the family. Eva's influencer career is currently paying the bills while Tanner struggles to get his degree while managing a family. But, he's hopeful that he will have a degree and great job very soon.
Rylee, Lawrence, and their twins Melany and Savannah! The face of Black Excellence are Lawyer Lawrence, Professor Rylee and their adorable twin girls! Rylee's parents have been super involved which has helped a lot. Lawrence is definitely hoping they will eventually try for a boy, but they are currently content watching the girls learn and grow.
#simdonia#mothers day!#look at all these bbs!!!#I should post some gameplay#bc I've played with all of them and lots of cute things happen!#maybe one day#also i'm not sure how katrina got pregnant again#turned off neighborhood stories after the first round of kids#but she said let me do what I want#then had the audacity to have twins!!! lol#obv I have less gameplay shots of that fam hahah#you can also see my slight makeovers on folks#when I played may and mateo I was so sad#their relationship has tanked#hopefully they will work it out
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Madame Web may be a ridiculous movie but it has one thing all the past mcu movies don't: good cinematography.
#just bc of that i've enjoyed it more than y'all led me to#bc yeah it's kinda lacking#but in the same sense that most superhero movies are#and the acting is lame as fuck#BUT the cinematography got me actually WATCHING this shit the whole time#and also i love anything spider-related at all#i'm hoping for a second one#and i hope it's just as bad HAHAH#just to piss all of you off#like i was watching endgame and infinity war before this one and i see no difference in how one's ridiculous dialogues and plotlines are +#better than the other's. they've got thanos monologuing 10 times without killing him. that's just. ridiculous.#so as far as superhero ridiculousness goes#this was pretty spot on#just really bad deliveries. like. REALLY bad.#the vfx was absolutely terrible tho#but i mean... for an origin story#it wasn't half as bad as i expected#then again i really liked the photography#maybe i was just thirsty for some good photography in a life action superhero movie bc last ones i've watched are all GREY#madame web#tp
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.
#when the american exchange student#who was in your 10th grade class for one semester#who was uncomfortably religious within your own sensibilities#but who you ended up following on insta years later#and has grown into a super interesting park ranger in the rocky mountains area#and now posts pics of her and her friends smoking and being relaxed and chill#and you start to reconsider you friendship with her YEARS later#and end up having a vicarious#fascination and intrest in#and there is no way you’d ever meet again but you still remember the last time you saw each other#and you really start to wonder how it’d be to meet again#sometimes i wish that i already han a reason to go to the us#and then be able to send her a message and let her know i was in the area#idk it’s suuuuch a unrealistic idea#but she posts a lot and i feel like we could get so along now#we got along really well before too#but she was so stifled by her christian convictions#hahah hanna from colorado if you read this hello#i wish i know how to reach out again#you made an impact on me for some reason
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So uh... what are some animated indie stuff that you like to watch?
For me its satina, humans b gone, and the june archives (technically an arg but ehh)
LACKADAISY.
Yeah, it's just a pilot. I have to admit I don't watch a lot of indie animation (hard for me to get into new things; I was technically never in the Helluva fandom either, my friend just wrote a lot about it so I followed along the first season). But I've been a fan of this webcomic for the past few years, so latest pointless drama aside, I'll stick up for that one until my dying breath. It's a goddamn masterpiece, I'm super happy that the Backerkit has made two million, and I remain hyped as all hell for the first season.
I also simp really hard for one of the characters. Crushes tend to help me stick around.
I've watched the Satina pilot and the first episode, though it was a long while back. I think I enjoyed it. Has any more of it come out yet?
#asks answered#is Salad Fingers indie animation? I've watched all of Salad Fingers to date#then again I'm not really ''into'' that either. though it's fascinating in a gross horrific way (complimentary)#I've always been into more studio-made stuff. WOY. Invader Zim. Gravity Falls. Villainous before the first season#not that it fell off after that I just never got around to watching it#I'm kinda lazy when it comes to new media hahah#I guess you wouldn't call Happy Tree Friends indie either? though with that one I was more about fanon than canon#I apologize if this is an underwhelming answer. I tend to hyperfixate on a select few completely unrelated things#and Helluva just so happens to be an indie show on YouTube#I think I also watched- CLIFFSIDE. The Cliffside pilot. that never became anything either huh#I've seen some nice opinions around on Long Gone Gulch so maybe I'll give that a shot too#aforementioned friend is into Murder Drones nowadays. which also is famously great. I'll have to check it out#and add to that the stuff you mentioned#see this is why I never get around to anything. my fun-things-to-watch list is unfathomably long and I get choice paralysis#admin talks
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Been a bit since I posted but I want everyone to know I started crocheting and now my cat has a mat and she now sits exclusively on the mat. She also gained like a billion pounds but y'know how it goes
#free paw pics too yall are spoiled#anyway my only excuse for not posting is that i dont need an excuse#but i also have a second excuse you wanna hear it?#do you?#i bet you do but what if i didn't tell you?#what then?#JK HAHAH i love dumping all my bs in the tags so my excuse is called i have ocd and love video games#the minecraft to red dead redemption pipeline seems like a myth but i have learned it is very real#oh yeah my cousin also got in a car wreck after egging the local sheriff's daughters car and will never walk the same again and then -#- my uncle got arrested for dui and other stupidity because he got so upset about losing his car lot insurance that he drove off -#- into the woods where a shady cop was just... out there for some reason and because hes stupid he mouthed off to the cop#he then proceeded to ask to stay in jail because he had 3 different ex girlfriends trying to bail him out and could have fought outside#you cant make this shit up my family is wild#anyways thats where ive been (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.)#animals#cats#petblr#cat life#cat lovers#catblr#cat#my cat#cat photos#sleepy cat#cat pics#pet cat#calico#calico cat#cute cats#cat pictures
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I respect your opinions and especially the way you defend your right to express them online, I don’t support people trying to shoo you away from the fandom in such horrible ways, but that one post you made about “me” on anon trying to support the artist that wanted to start making YouTube videos is kinda hurtful. I didn’t have any ill intentions and wasn’t trying to imply that their queerness is the ONLY thing that’s interesting about their takes, it was just that: a few simple words of support meant for specifically this person, that I thought of while typing that anon ask, I knew they won’t interpret it the way you do and didn’t see any problem with it. I’ve been following this artist for years and I really liked them as a person (they even used to be my tumblr crush) and as a creator, and yes, the fact that they take into account less common interpretations (aka lgbt headcanons) is ONE OF THE THINGS I appreciate about them. I feel like you overreacted too much and projected onto“me” things you have been resenting about people who hurt you and claimed they did it for righteous reasons. Just because I share their enjoyment of “queer interpretations” of my hyperfixation doesn’t mean I hate cishet people and think their interpretations are automatically “lesser”. I even distanced myself from certain people in the fandom BECAUSE I saw how hypocritically they treated you and it made me feel unsafe in this space. Sorry for accidentally digging out this post that you made about “me”, not suspecting that the anon that angered you isn’t one of the people who dogpiled you and that maybe they even enjoys some of your content. I don’t want to start drama with you, I just got jumpscared by realizing that you’re talking about ME in one of your opinionated posts and, I admit, felt personally attacked for things I never even meant to imply. I’m just as autistic and chronically online as you and take petty and unimportant things personally. I don’t want to be your enemy is what I’m trying to say. Have a nice day!
It was very surprising to wake up to this, and thank you so much for reaching out about this. I will add the post about my reaction for the context:
This is true that re-reading this post now sounds like I've made some very strong assumptions about you. You told that artist to make their own lore videos because "we need more queer voices in BB/DS/ER analysis videos", and the way I interpreted it? ...yeah the post IS here on how. I don't want to vague, so here for anyone who doesn't know what we're talking about, witness my anger in all its ugliness. /srs "Projecting" my own bad experiences, as well as just a very unlikeable trend I do see in the fandom, is an understatement: I straight up assumed that you were possibly one of the people who at least agreed with slander, and yes, my already pre-existing paranoia has grown x4 times stronger after all the stalking and harassment. I don't think there is a way to heal and go back on always assuming the worst unless I distance from the fandom for a year or so, but unfortunately, engaging in a special interest is a bit too crucial for me as a person. It is like if I have a poor eyesight and special interest is my glasses, and sure as hell 'irl fandom group' is not a thing in my city, or even country, so
All this is the context to specify that I can't promise that "now I've learned my lesson to never assume something about strangers online and will never do it again :333". Because this is just too late. I'd say that "at least I should not post these assumptions publicly", but by coming to me to talk about you've healed a grudge that has been bothering me, whereas if I just kept it in private I'd still feel angry. So, in the end, posting it publicly.... helps? Because it found you, even if odds were small, kinda like tossing bottle in the sea and it actually being picked up by someone.
I am still sorry for hurting you so, it is not a normal situation. THE lesson I should carry from it is, "maybe the person I am assuming things about thought the rest of the context was self-explanatory". You already feel unsafe in the fandom like you said, and I really regret that I've added to this anxiety (even if by different reason and context). I used to love that artist a lot and they were crucial part of my enjoyment in the fandom. Hopefully they did start to make videos, though. We do need more people to do analysis, just that, the identity of the one that does them should never matter. By your message you meant that thanks to that, their analyses would be able to feature readings like transgenderism and gay feelings, when people that do not experience either would simply most likely not read them in the story, and it should have been obvious from the start without an explanation. But you know how it is 🤝 autism, right.
I still value that you found me approachable enough to address the post directly and explain, and I am sorry. It is a no brainer that I no longer have hard feelings. You helped me with this a lot, but I don't have a way to help you back besides declaring my assumptions 100% invalid. I hope this will still work.
#ask replies#fandomry rambles#personal#(ish)#I don't know how to apologise because every time I tried and did feel genuine they got picked apart for detecting the signs of-#-'not taking accountability uwu'. again WHO I am explaining this to? you literally just said you saw how those people think hahah#but yes that taught me that dissecting the situation (for lack of better term) is more helpful than trying to undo the harm#I know I can't take back the anxiety you've endured because of my overreacting. it is now set in history however small moment.#and I do feel bad about it.#but I am glad that you addressed it directly in my face. okay on anon actually but you are genuine so it counts.
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NEVER!!!! *runs away w/ hat*
MY HAAAAT- :(
#hey hey hey! a ask!#marx#marx kirby#well- the secret about my ears are out and now I'll never get my signature hat back#...luckly i got many more of the same hat!! HAHAH ADHD AND FORGETTING WHERE YOU PLACE THINGS WINS AGAIN#YOU THOUGHT THAT WAS MY ONLY HAT? YOU FOOLS I HAVE HUNDREDS!!!
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I will quite literally probably never accept that anyone likes me romantically
#whimsy whispers#whims woes#I already don’t believe anyone likes me generally but like#the only times people have liked me I’ve ended up dumped#the only time someone has shown interest in me first it was as I mentioned in the tags of my prev psot: a mutual who kept sending anons#saying they had a crush on wnd was in love with me while pretending they didn’t send them#before finally admitting it was them and then being weird about it#or people flirting with me as a joke and then it’s like hahah my feelings are a joke to you (this hasn’t happened in a while so I never got#the chance to go ‘hey can you not flirt with me as a joke it kinda hurts a lot!’ which is good because I didn’t wanna have that convo#maybe they got from my reluctance to participate that I didn’t like them doing that idk#I have never brought it up with them and as long as they don’t flirt with me as a haha funny joke again I never will#actually in middle and high school a few ppl showed interest in me but I never like felt the same way towards them#just like#my attempts at romance do not end well as I said I get dumped a month and a few days is the longest both my actual relationships lasted#oh weird men who were my customers also use to flirt with me when I and a job which was uncomfy because i was working and was forced to be#polite and I couldn’t tell my managers because they didn’t care!#uhhh anyways I do not believe I’m ever going to be in a loving relationship and it sucks#but I also guess it’s for the better because I probably wouldn’t ever believe anyone who says they like me in such a way anyways whne I#hardly believe anyone platonically cares for me either#I think a relationship with me is destined to fail and would be toxic because I’m clingy and have trouble being loved#delete later#this is a dumb psot but most my woes posts are!#so I’ll bury it under posts and forget about it and then delete it when I remember it exists#sorry again remembering that one mutual and just noting everything else made me go ‘huh im going to die alone aren’t I?’
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