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h-ayuchan · 1 year ago

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o⟡⃞ ㅤ➳ ㅤ ㅤㅤ　⌯　 ˳꙳˚:

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panthermouthh · 1 year ago

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And I said, “Hello, Satan

I believe it’s time to go.”

#my art #southern gothic #been too depressed to create anything but I’ve made this today #the little rhyme has been in my head for a few weeks #spilled ink #I guess do people still use that tag for poetry or am I old lol #I’ve been writing in my journal pretty much daily and sometimes spitting out little poems like this #not much energy for art #so I’m not gonna pressure myself to keep it up #I’m just gonna enjoy the fact that I made this #I hope ur all well <33 #the devil #by the way this isn’t meant to be fan art of Robert Johnson #but it’s inspired by him and the stories of musicians who sell their souls to the devil #I am still thinking very hard and have mostly drafted a cornstalk fiddle comic #god knows how long it’ll stay in a notebook haha #my comic #comics

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thresholdbb · 7 months ago

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what's the threshold theory

There was a post about how Tom is the only crew member who isn't really affected by the Borg, and there's a theory that he has so much luck because he saw the past and the future when he crossed the transwarp threshold. He saw the past and the future, all of time and space. There's some subconscious part of him that remembers that experience. In fact, Tom refused to play a part in Chakotay indulging Annorax's temporal incursions, probably because a part of him knew nothing good could come of it.

If we extend that same theory to Janeway, some of her wild luck with time travel and other crack plans starts to make sense. She doesn't verbally hate time travel until after the events of Threshold, since it happens in Time and Again without complaint. Janeway has an uncanny knack for time travel, as evidenced every time she deals with it. She hates time travel, but it might be because part of her knows exactly how to manipulate the timeline. She manages to avoid the "inevitable" temporal explosion in Future's End, saving both Voyager and Braxton. She resets the entire timeline in Year of Hell, and no one else followed her reasoning. She pulled it off flawlessly. In Relativity, she senses the incidents are all related, despite it being just one reading that connects them. By the time she's involved, she has a temporal incursion factor of .0036 and a time travel protocol named after her, even if that may just be Braxton's personal grudge. Then there's Endgame, where she intentionally changes the timeline. Up until this point, she has been dragged into time travel, but for the first time, she jumps in on purpose. How does Admiral Janeway know how to get them home sooner in a way that completely avoids the Temporal Integrity Commission? It's because she has seen all of time, and part of her knows exactly what needs to happen so she can get Voyager home and do it in a way that becomes baked into the prime timeline. Maybe she doesn't consciously remember what happened during her transformation, but the experience lives in her mind somewhere, guiding her decisions.

#every day is threshold day #tldr threshold cemented the time travel shenanigans #we're not counting her disparagement of time travel in relativity i know it's technically before threshold #but they've messed with the timeline so much that her past timeline is also changed.#Time travel is funny because the past is the future the future is the past #so while relativity comes before threshold in the prime timeline her timeline has also been changed in a way that it wasn't before threshol #we could chalk it up to a writing oversight but this is more interesting #not to mention her uncanny luck with the Borg which I think ties in as well #it's part of why her instinct is so strong #also the bio neural gel packs but that's a different theory #listen she's amazing with or without having seen all of time and space but she has seen all of time and that must have affected her somehow #those little salamander babies also have all of the cosmos in their mind #tried to explain as concisely as possible but it is part of my overarching theory #she doesn't second guess herself nearly as much following their jaunt into transwarp #I have more but I'm trying to be brief cause it's written up partially in my drafts somewhere and i have some things i need to do today lol #meta #Star Trek voyager #Kathryn janeway #threshold day #did you expect me thresholdbb to not have a serious threshold theory?#listen I can make anything nonsense and turn anything into a serious theory I was known for this kinda bs in grad school #I wrote a 25 page paper on NOTHING once #I wrote a paper about how corn fields were super gay and it made my professor cry I can spin the bullshit it is one of my skills

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zzztlk · 1 year ago

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Im glad the depression is gone! Now have one oc illustration on my desk (tumblr dash) by 5 🥸

Alright Regan be upon ye

#spoilers for like. my next three posts I guess lol #I recently realized how samey my expressions have gotten esp so I've been going back in my draft and redoing a bunch of them #it's much more of a problem with nat who's two modes I've realized were either brooding or tbh creature #trying to put a little more pep in her step. a little whimsy perhaps #Regan #ttbasks

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nicoyarobin · 3 months ago

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#one piece #nico robin #opgraphics #animeedit #onepieceedit #animangaladies #animangaedit #anime gifs #one piece gifs #animanga #wano #opgifs #cleaning drafts #how do you call it when 'I want to gif but don't feel like it'#burn out...?#good thing I have a few unfinished sets that do not require too much work to finish #also if casting rumors about Robin end up being true I guess I'll be burned out for some time...#anyway xD #by me

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wonder-worker · 3 months ago

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Wild how we know that Elizabeth Woodville was officially appointed to royal councils in her own right during her husband’s reign and fortified the Tower of London in preparation of a siege while 8-months pregnant and had forces gathering at Westminster “in the queen’s name” in 1483 – only for NONE of these things to be even included, let alone explored, in the vast majority of scholarship and historical novels involving her.

#lol I don't remember writing this - I found it when I was searching for something else in my drafts. But it's 100% true so I had to post it.#elizabeth woodville #my post #Imo this is mainly because Elizabeth's negative historiography has always involved both vilification and diminishment in equal measure.#and because her brand of vilification (femme fatale; intriguer) suggests more indirect/“feminine” than legitimate/forceful types of power #It's still bizarre though-you'd think these would be some of the most famous & defining aspects of Elizabeth's life. But apparently not #I guess she only matters when it comes to marrying Edward and Promoting Her Family and scheming against Richard #There is very lacking interest in her beyond those things even in her traditionally negative depictions #And most of her “reassessments” tend to do diminish her so badly she's rendered utterly irrelevant and almost pathetic by the end of it #Even when some of these things *are* mentioned they're never truly emphasized as they should be.#See: her formal appointment in royal councils. It was highly unconventional + entirely unprecedented for queens in the 14th & 15th century #You'd think this would be incredibly important and highlighted when analyzing late medieval queenship in England but apparently not #Historians are more willing to straight-up INVENT positions & roles for so many other late medieval queens/king's mothers that didn't exist #(not getting into this right now it's too long...)#But somehow acknowledging and discussing Elizabeth's ACTUAL formally appointed role is too much for them I guess #She's either subsumed into the general vilification of her family (never mind that they were known as 'the queen's kin' to actual #contemporaries; they were defined by HER not the other way around) or she's rendered utterly insignificant by historians. Often both.#But at the end of the day her individual role and identity often overlooked or downplayed in both scenarios #and ofc I've said this before but - there has literally never been a proper reassessment of Elizabeth's role in 1483-85 TILL DATE #despite the fact that it's such a sensational and well-known time period in medieval England #This isn't even a Wars of the Roses thing. Both Margaret of Anjou and Margaret Beaufort have had multiple different reassessments #of their roles and positions during their respective crises/upheavals by now;#There is simply a distinct lack of interest in reassessing Elizabeth in a similar way and I think this needs to be acknowledged.#Speaking of which - there's also a persistent habit of analyzing her through the context of Margaret of Anjou or Elizabeth of York #(either as a parallel or a foil) rather than as a historical figure in HER OWN RIGHT #that's also too long to get into I just wanted to point it out because I hate it and I think it's utterly senseless #I've so much to say about how all of this affects her portrayal in historical fiction as well but that's going into a whole other tangent #ofc there are other things but these in particular *really* frustrate me #just felt like ranting a bit in the tags because these are all things that I want to individually discuss someday with proper posts...

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tagidearte · 2 months ago

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There's something special about Moon being the only side of the DCA who has canonically (gameverse) voiced his counterpart's name ("No more Sun", which yes it's not him directly saying Sun's name since it's a figure of speech, but still) whereas Sun - the chatterbox - only refers to Moon via "he" or "other me". Moon, the quiet one who mostly laughs vs Sun who mostly uses words. Sun, who is scared of Moon, never utters his name whereas Moon clearly has no problem with it. Both of them using "we☀️/us🌙" prior to Eclipse. Moon, whose only opinion of Sun we can infer is "the other me trapped me in light so now I trap him in shadow", vs Sun's whole thing which is profoundly more fleshed out.

I don't know man, the "no more Sun" line always did things to me. I remember playing Ruin for the first time and getting this... jarring emotion when I heard Moon saying that. It's such a small line but good god did I latch onto it.

#dca #daycare attendant #villain.text #fnaf #I have an entire post on my fandom side blog hidden in my drafts #about the way sun and moon refer to themselves and each other #and it's really fun #sun refers to himself as an I more often than moon does btw #which is probably because of the way moon structures is sentences #moon rarely puts himself as a subject to he barely talks about himself #example: bad children must be found vs I will find you #it's implicit he'll find you but he doesn't say it #you must be punished vs I'll punish uou #you*#he only really says I in the deleted voiceline of 'im putting you in time out'#sun is the one who structures his sentences more 'normally' and tends to speak of himself and has mo qualms with being the subject of his #own sentences #I'm rambling #maybe I'll post that one day #I'm a bit shy #sorry for the typos in the tags I can't correct it on mobile #also moon speaks in a much more childish manner. which I guess can be creepy #but I always found horror things like that cute rather than scary lmao #I am once again so sad they didn't use the dca to prop up vanny/vanessa. how fun would it be to get a line like that from vanny.#telling gregory there is no more night guard woman only rabbit lady. and then he saves her.

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triglycercule · 9 days ago

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horror's about to get his shit rocked i guess but its ok he got to say a cool line. anyways i had this silly little idea :3 horror deserves to be the one inflicting pain onto killer sometimes anyways it can't ALWAYS be killer being sadistic 😒😒😒

#killer got a bit too silly and horror had to put him in line #and by a bit too silly i mean do the wrong thing at the wrong time (when horrors in a bad mood)#i had this idea all throughout school broooo BROOOOO they hate eachother so much why do they stick around #if it were dust doing it he'd do it in silence or maybe rambling a lot of stuff really quietly to himself #but nooo horror likes to rub it in killer's face and oh shiiiit stage 3 RUUUUN #its ok its ok horror dont worry ill protect you with my totally awesome creator powers!#and then they made up and kissed dont worry this was all consensual #dust's bitches get a bit freaky sometimes dont worry it was ALL planned totally not spontaneous #i think this is one of (if not the only) times ive ever DRAWN out my short little ideas #usually i just like. imagine it and then type it out and have to figure out how to make it a hc or rant or wtvr #but i really didn't think i could capture this idea in anything but art. see this is why i dont particularly like my artstyle #this looks SO silly and goofyUGH!!!! if only my art didn't look like an 11 yro drew it #this is totally horrorkiller btw this is ship art :3 #thinking about that five finger filet draft i have again about hrkl FUCK i need to actually edit that one #horror's new design looks so cool here UGH THE CLOAK!!! ITS SO SIMPLE BUT ADDS SO MUCH!!!!#mtt are one big echo chamber of negative reinforcement and improvement #they all learn to not piss eachother off but not because they respect eachother #but just because none of them wanna deal with the fighting or the insults #hey i mean...... if it works it works i guess! don't fix what's broken!#besides it's better like this anyways. what's that? actually be vulnerable and learn to accept eachother? you sound mad #they can get their therapy and positive influences ELSEWHERE!!!! TOGETHER THEY SUCK ‼️‼️‼️‼️#alright time to make some progress on swapinverse :3 i've actually been doing a lot lately!!!!#if i dont finish crash's extra facts section today let's just say that you wont be hearing from me. forever. becaus ill be killing myse #tricule art #maybe i should start the comic now...... :3333 mayhaps #NEED TO FINISH CHARACTER LORE AND THEN ACTUAL STORY AND THEN CAN MAKE COMIC

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valkyurii · 27 days ago

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it’s funny how things have gone full circle with malenia. she was so hated when the game first came out, but then people grew to like her. then the dlc came out and now people hate her again lmao

#i mean it’s hardly surprising given what we now know #she did all that awful shit and wasn’t even charmed #like i see people talk about how stupid miquella is because of this plan to essentially trap radahn #but that also makes malenia look stupid af too #‘go to caelid and kill radahn so i can marry him’ ans she was like sure #miquella wanted the one guy in the lands between who loves war and fighting to be his consort for his age of peace and compassion…#what a genius he is.#makes me wonder why he even needs some heavy weight to keep order for him when he can just charm people into submission #was radahn just there as a ceremonial position?#oh wait i forgot miquella thinks he’s super kind so that’s why he wants him #miq learnt about the gravity magic horse thing and swooned #honestly still can’t get over how incredibly stupid the twins look after the dlc #i think people like to imagine malenia was charmed just because it makes it all look slightly better on her part #like they are just making excuses for her #but holy shit the fact she was all but willing to fucking die so miquella could bag radahn..#what a thing to die for lmao #and he was apparently present after the battle? but didn’t do anything to help either radahn nor malenia?#instead he was helping a random redmane?#he obviously knew malenia had bloomed but ultimately didn’t care i guess #kind of like ‘oh well if she’s still alive when I get back i’ll deal with it then’#honestly wish miquella had just died in that cocoon at this point #tbh he doesn’t really do much in the dlc anyway they could have made it more about messmer and marika #hell bring melina into it please that would have been more interesting at this point #we didn’t need the dubcon incest plot micheal you could have left that one in the drafts #i gotta get this out of my head it’s driving me nuts #seriously need to move on from this game for my own sanity

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icewindandboringhorror · 7 months ago

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boy in silly sitting positions compilation

#cats #I especially like the last one where he just has one single paw poking out of that box for some reason lol #I still have costumes to post and like a billion other things.... grr... constantly failing at staying active on social media aughh #I think because currently my Main Focus is on trying to get my game done and stuff.. which basically just means sitting and writing all day #so there's not much to post about. Though I know the Good At Social Media thing to do would be to post about the #writing and share progress and talk about the game and characters or whatever to try to build interest or something but that is SOOO weird #to me.. I could maybe get it if it was like a tiny tiny discord groupchat of playtesters with like 5 people in #it.. But something about talking openly about things before they happen is weird to me?? Like presumptuous feeling or something #''oooo guess whats gonna happen LATER!!!'' like.. how do you know.. what if it doesnt. what if you dont finish it. what if its not the way #you think it's going to be. what if something changes. etc. Like I literally avoid movie trailers and game trailers for the same reason ghj #Even if it's not ME doing it it just feels... weird.. Maybe it has to do with my OCD and how I just don't like talking about ''future''#things in Certain Terms. Like if I was going to say ''Oh yeah sure. come over to my house in a few months''. I would have to follow it up #with like ''HOPEFULLY you can come over to my house in a few months'' or 'They'll come over in a few months MOST LIKELY''. Because just #stating that something will happen matter of factly takes for granted like.. what if somehting horrible happens and I DONT have a house #in a few months? or what if something bad happens to me. or to the person coming over? I can't ever DEFINITELY say with 100% certainty #that one could ACTUALLY come to my house in a few months. anything could change. So I have to allot for that in my phrasing. hbjjkn #There are a lot of situations where you're expected to just Assume Things but for some reason that bothers me. My brain literally does not #even Assume the most basic things.. like how do *I* know that just because it's someones birthday that they want to be wished a happy #birthday? what if they dont? everyone is different and has different preferences. I should check with them first. or wait until they public #ly announce that theyre accepting birthday wishes. I have to allot for all 5034859069 rare possibilities at any given time and never take #anything for certain. etc. ghjbjhbh.... ANYWAY.. I have been feeling a bit sick lately as usual.. but still slowly making progress on some #things. Moslty I need to edit costume photos. make sculptures. and work on the game. Going back reading some of the old writing from like #2018 and suprisingly I don't have to change that much of it? In fact I like it mostly. so that's good. I would be very interested if I were #playing the game myself. Though that doesnt mean much since my tastes are so niche lol..#Still really want to clear some of my million tumblr drafts as well... alas and aughh and ooughh and so on and so forth. Between all of my #evil appointments other such things...why cant I have one billion dollar to retire into relaxed hermit artist life of no stressors.. bleas

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kingofthering · 6 months ago

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After being started on the 29th of September 2023, the "Every Rosquez Podium" series will finish tomorrow, on the 2nd of June 2024.

#argentina 2019 is in the drafts #I'll have to figure out what's the best time to post it tomorrow #and then we'll start the fave podium poll I guess #maybe do the mabio podiums next #this was a total of 144 gifs #which is a not and not that much at the same time #but I don't wanna know how many hours I spent on them #(too much definitely)

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sysig · 13 days ago

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Challenge level: Impossible (Patreon)

#Doodles #Spoiler alert: I was in fact not normal about it lol #You can tell those first two are old by comparison for how short my hair was at the time lol #From back in July! I guess I just hadn't been drawing myself much there for a bit huh #As for that last one I swear I Promise I drafted this in September it's not a reference I'm just actually genuinely Like This lol #I didn't choose this life etc. etc. lol #From the top!#Burst of inspiration wherever could that have come from hehe <3 What could've happened in July that made me want to draw I wonder hehehe #Bit funny considering I fell off posting - not like the inspiration stopped! And what I Did draw was Very lol #I still have some of it in an ever-present photoviewer because I like being able to look at it at any point <3 #Still inspired! Still want to do more studies!! So pretty ♥♪♫#Sleepy thoughts - I had my Pkmn Diamond/SoulSilver field dex/guides for all of like two months and then they were packed up again #And this was Before the Pokemon burst! Sheesh sheesh #I love my field guide dexes they're so neat and well-made ahh #I have got a couple craft projects still back-burnered - those papercrafts to do with Pokemon are still on the list!#A little Pokedex-notebook is so fun.......And I have Pokemon stickers that I could put in it or on it......ah........#I do want to! I will at some point the energy will return to it eventually #Alright so the main course lol #Went fabric shopping for plushies because yes I Am determined to Make Thing! Another that's been a bit backburnered - but I will!!!#I do still really want to it's turned out pretty good for far :) But while I was shopping!!#We did the usual small talk thing with the store employee like ''Oh what are you buying this for'' that whole back-and-forth #So I explained that I was making plushies and needed the tear-away stabilizer to draw the embroidery outline on #In my head I was being very tempered because while /I/ know that I'm making a Max plushie not many people are familiar with him (wrongly so)#Lol #So we continued and he was like ''Oh cool I've made some patches with embroidery :)'' so I asked of what and he lead with CotL's crown #And then-#Look Zarla's work was Already on my mind with Max as my project I was in a Delicate Way already do you really expect me not to talk about it #The answer was no and he walked away with a Vargas recommendation in his pocket I hope he enjoyed it lol #And I got my fabric and started work on Max's face it's fine it all worked out in the end it's all good it's great lol #I Was encouraged to come back with my finished project so that's on my to-do once I get him in a presentable state haha

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james-spooky · 2 months ago

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this is a test

#i’m bored i just wanna see how many words i can put in the tags like will it just keep going on forever or will they stop me like i know th #the tag limit is 30 ok so the iindividual tag limit is 140 characters that’s actually so rude i wanted to keep going forever and see how lo #g this could be but i guess we can do this 30 times ok what the flip should i talk about hm i was playing the guitar today but i rage quit #ause the song was hard and hurting my fingers! ermmmmm it was sunny ok this is boring let’s think of more exciting things to type hmmm acco #ding to all known laws of aviation- jk i’m not doing the bee movie script but can you imagine i think that would be funny hmmmmm words i lo #e podcasts so bad that’s a fact no one has ever know before my blog definitely isn’t all about audio dramas the people are definitely not a #ready aware of this jesus christ this is only the seventh one of these this is actually quite a lot of space i underestimated how much i ha #e to type btw there’s probably spelling mistakes in here somewhere or autocorrect has been annoying but i cba to retype anything so i don’t #care lolllllllllllll how do you feel about oscar malevolent i feel a normal amount actually (lie) yk what i really miss sam and colin alrea #y like i’m actually not okay i really hope we hear from sam again in s2 and also colin ngl i hope ur in the computers soz or not dead miss #im like a bastard my paranoid it king ok erm im running out of things to say um heartstopper s3 was crazy good i cried lmao i love gay peop #e so much it’s crazy i hope it gets renewed for s4 i need to reread the comics lowkey and the books they’re all so talented for being so yo #ng it scares me ngl !!!!!! the tmagp hiatus is getting to me slightly like february in reality is soon and not that far away for how podcas #ts go but seriously how am i supposed to live until then without knowing what happened. please colin be alive. ive only just realised i can #use fills stops. sorry that’s made everything a bit messy. i should’ve been doing this before. whoops. anyways. hi mutuals i love you all s #much i hope you enjoy my rambles and shitposts cause i enjoy yours very much! never think you’re being annoying i literally don’t care be a #annoying as you want posts as much as you want i am ur biggest fan <3 im getting a bit fatigued from typing like my mind is blank basically #now it’s just turned into a. stream of consciousness but i don’t really have any thoughts to put here idk if we’re halfway ermmmm omg it’s #lmost halloween how crazy is that time is flying by i kinda forgot it was october lmao. it’s wild how it’s basically almost christmas. like #what. that’s illegal. how is it wintertime again. what the flip. i miss summer already take me backkkkkkk. i hope my phone doesn’t crash or #smth cause i’ve not saved this as a draft and i cba to do any of this again. maybe i should save it. ok i will when i reach the next tag bc #ok it stopped me but i’ve saved it and holy jesus it’s a lot of text im just sat here giggling there’s really no point to any of this other #than me being bored sooooooooooooooooo (imagine if i just did the letter o for every character wouldn’t that be crazy) so wait there’s 140 #haracters and 30 tags so what’s 30 x 140. someone hurry. i haven’t done maths lessons in two and a half years i’ve forgotten everything wai #let me get the calculator app ok im back it said 4100 characters so. i dont know how many words that roughly is but its. a decent amount. o #what the flip why am i wasting tag space with maths. i hate maths. my screen time has been actually soooooooooo bad recently like damn some #one put my phone in a block of ice please joshua gillespie style. my mind is running out of things to say. do i talk about myself. im james #im 18 which is weird cause wdym im an adult go away. ive run out of facts. i love podcasts and procedural dramas that stupid firefighter sh #w is my life unfortunately. i think chappell roan should be the queen of england instead of king charles. i dont like having a king cause #ho needs men in power not me. ok um this is the last tag equal rights for all. yolo. the time will pass anyways! thank u boredom ok bye gn:

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moe-broey · 3 months ago

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Some. Sort of spectrum. From most likely to least likely.

And by kitten-pile I mean This

I'll put a transcript under cut for easier reading! 🫡

How Likely Are They to Kitten Pile?

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Mirabilis: "are you tired..? do you need a break...? ohh we could take one together..."

If she likes/trusts you even a little, she wants to cuddle about it!!!

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Sharena and Peony: "Okay! 💖 Yay! 💖"

Shari: The only thing stopping her is social conventions -- making her MORE likely to jump at the opportunity!

Peony: Learning social awareness as she goes, and is surprisingly good at it?

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Triandra: "Aren't we a bit old for that...? But... even so..."

Embarrassed, conflicted, but feels strangely nostalgic at the notion...

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Plumeria: "I'm not so petal-soft that I'd resort to such INDECENCY, I mean even if your intentions are Pure USE YOUR HEADS YOU FOOLS!! Girl, the IMPLICATIONS!!!"

Desperately wants to join the kitten-pile, but her Issues and Pride gets in the way.

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Moe: "aw, so cutes!"

Generally touch adverse, extremely picky even with the people it likes/loves -- everything is entirely on its terms.

#fire emblem #feh #STILL. DRAFTING. IT FEELS LIKE. concetualizing. ect.#but this vision was So Strong. and is honestly Such a way to parse each out.#like... mira craves warmth and comfort... i think she esp likes cuddling w peony bc it feels like a mother's touch #esp the discrepancy in body types i'm going w here. i really wanna draw them together actually...#meanwhile LONG. LONG STANDING HC. about sharena being v physically affectionate even touch starved #and having to learn boundaries the hard way. i also think a huge difference between her and peony actually #is that peony always had someone to cuddle with (mira!!). so peony never had to 'outgrow' it the way shari had to #which may have led to peony being a little more adjusted actually??? i also am v much playing w the idea #that peony is like min maxed. she's surprisingly socially aware/emotionally intelligent #BUT. she still has huge blind spots due to her seclusion and mostly only interacting w kid mortals (in the dream realm)#and i esp think she fails to see the complexity in situations. ect ect #triandra. boy do i have lore about triandra. but you can take a guess. i'll leave that up to you.#AND PLUMERIA. OH MY GOD PLUMERIA. i can just TELL she's going to be an EXTREMELY FUN chara to write #she basically writes herself. looking deeper beyond the obvious sex repulsion/intimacy issues #she's a stubborn jaded 'too cool for this' older sister. who is WAY more protective than she will Ever Admit.#LIKE... I AM THINKING ESP HOW SHE TREATED MIRA IN THAT TT SIDE STORY.#the way she was looking out for her. tri is absolutely plum's most trusted confidant and therefore #the person she's most vulnerable with. but even then. she's still protective of mira and i bet even peony if she had trouble #(granting. they're on the same side). AUGH AND ALSO THE WAY PLUM IS STUCK IN HER WAYS TOO....#I DON'T HAVE COHERENT THOUGHTS. but the way plumeria Is just resonates so deeply w me...#mirabilis #sharena #fe peony #fe triandra #fe plumeria #moe tag #summoner oc #my art

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mcybree · 4 months ago

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Im doing a lot of thinking abt why roleplaying feels different/less natural for me in beastlife s4 in comparison to s3, and i think it’s because there’s ways i know i should be feeling (based on the perception of my character— when i was fresh out of s2 nobody knew enough about my guy to have opinions) vs how i am feeling. I’m catching myself thinking, “it wouldn’t make sense for my character to [blank],” and it’s like… what do i mean by that. what do i mean that this feeling im having in-session “wouldnt make sense for my character” to feel? It might be surprising to other beasts who know me for one thing and expect consistency, i guess?? but in s3 i just acted on feelings and then shit happened. what. why am i trying to enforce a character that does not exist when the strength of mcrp lies in its improvisational nature. I didn’t write this guy on purpose, why am i trying to write him now

#i suppose its both the perception + higher investment from myself #I care about this story greatly now #and want it to be “good”. But there’s only so much control i have over that #Its not my job to break down the themes of the narrative and try my best to make it cohesive im here to play games and dramatics #My favorite mcrp narratives werent written on purpose. they literally just happened naturally #Imagine if i went into elysium after death thinking “how do i properly conclude my character arc”#And not “This will probably land us a conclusion. lets ball”#I think there’s also more pressure because my character is universally seen as a bad guy now so im like. ohh #What if i make him too sympathetic on accident and everyone thinks im weird irl about it #Bitch youre roleplaying with cubes. who give a fuck……#sorry for posting like you people know what im talking about btw #But i also just think mcrp is rlly interesting #beastlife #<- i guess. I use it as an organizational tag but its funny that there’s a “maintag” now #Still using it for organization though idgaf #Unrelated but I got a good scott ask earlier today in my drafts that i just remembered #The forgetter #Ftr i think its good to be somewhat narratively aware but the way i typically do it is in an entertainer sense #and not a serious serious mode writing sense. i am much more comfortable with one of these over the other #which would be why playing s4 feels a bit unnatural for me at times #not to say people who do go into mcrp with this mindset are like. wrong. it just does not work for me i think

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dawnthefluffyduck · 4 months ago

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Sunday doodles

#you ever just *puts feet on the wall*#or sit upside down off the side of your bed #i saw a post earlier this week I've been trying to find about fearing god #i read it but didn't have time to share my thoughts and i forgot to save it to my drafts so i lost it #anyway they talked about fearing god in service today #the overlap of related events like this scares me all the time #like... i know this stuff just happens and they had this sermon planned for months and it's coincidental #''but what if god is actually real and this is him trying to talk to me? what if he's trying to move me back on track?''#that's something i can't help but think #i'm starting to think I'll never know what is real and whether there's a god and if i really am setting myself up to burn in hell #i have to make a choice whether to leave my friends and hide who I am and go back to the church #or be myself and enjoy my time alive knowing what could be waiting for me when I go #I know that sounds extremely dramatic but it's something I think about a lot #it's one thing for someone to have never gotten to known God #but some say that the one unforgivable sin - the only thing that can keep you out of heaven forever...#...is knowing god and accepting him in your heart but then turning your back on him #I've done those rituals; been baptized and taken communion and said the famous prayer #if that unforgivable sin is true then I guess i've already made my choice; there really is no going back for me haha #damn right that god is scary lol #not tagging the game because I monolouged too much lmao #doodles #sunday doodles #depressing sunday doodle posts have arrived once again #dw im chilling today just lost in thought #was able to put in pto so i get the day to reflect on the very important things 21 year olds think about #things like ''what could've been'' and ''how do i want to draw my next fluffy boy''

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