#grow journal

[krysmcscience]

I have some questions about karaoke night, Alex Hirsch. Very Important Questions. Which I will happily scream at a poor hapless baby triangle who can have no answers for me, and possibly also does not have object permanence yet.

Follow-up that is I guess suggestive, but let's be real here, Bill's a fucking triangle:

Dude slipped right into his birthday suit, lmao

this is so stupid :D

Anyway, I don't care what anyone says, this brilliant individual knows what's up - Bill is absolutely way more of a monsterfucker than Ford could or ever will be, full stop.

[turndecassette2]

[crowleaf]

Day three and seeds haven’t germed 😔 I’ll give them up to another week before calling them unviable

[solarpunkidealist]

9/11 - saw first pistils on the 5 gal pot! Fed both heavy with Epsom salt two days ago and now fertilizer, mostly bloom. Haven’t pH’d the water in a while. It’s hard to get it right with drops. Looks like soil mix was magnesium deficient for growth in the 5 gal but I didn’t realize for a very long time due to the fact that the 1 gal is fine and getting very tall. I thought it was nutrient or light burn. I’ll try to find kelp to add in for my next grow. I think I’ll try to do one 5 gal over the winter with topping twice.

[liefst]

from blossom to pie 🍎🥧

[alleviated-griefcase]

The majority would most likely agree that making amends and accepting to yourself that you are not able to fulfill or continue being capable of doing things as you previously could do so effortlessly on the fly. But now those tasks are nearly impossible to do presently.

It’s one of those life’s hard cups to swallow.

Life’s changes…

Hoping for some better waves in the swell.

[389]

[nenoname]

Journal 3’s references to Stan

Post-Weirdmageddon

“I bristled at the idea of sharing my accomplishments with anyone. I shunned my brother for one dumb mistake, and I shunned Fiddleford for having the nerve to try to stop me from dooming the world.”

“I just couldn’t get over the idea of myself as the lone hero.. and it was Stanley who paid the price.”

“Trust shouldn’t be given unconditionally, but it should be given a chance to be earned. There is strength in having the humility to work with and sacrifice for others- a strength I now realize was in my brother all along.”

"Stanley Pines was the man who saved the world, not me. I spent so long thinking he was a selfish jerk, and he turned out to be the most selfless man I've ever met in any dimension. If I'm totally honest, I must admit that he's a hero and I'm... a hero's brother. And I'm okay with that.

Thank goodness he is recovering his wonderfully twisted mind. And I vow to spend the rest of my days making things right between us... If only he gives me a chance."

“When Stanley and I were kids, we would often read tales of the Sibling Brothers- about two boys who dedicated their lives to exploring mysteries together. With a new anomaly to investigate, I’ve been thinking about those tales more and more lately.”

"Dipper is no longer my apprentice, and Fiddleford has a genuine career as an inventor ahead of him- so I think it's time for the Pines Twins to join forces again. At least, I hope so. I haven't discussed my idea with Stan yet. But if I know my brother, he will jump at the chance to find "money and babes.""

"The path before us is clear. And it looks like this:"

“I had suggested to Dipper that because of all the misfortune caused by them, we burn [the Journals] in the last campfire of the summer. Mabel, Soos & Stan all seemed very excited by this notion.”

“You hold a record of one man’s folly and the kindness of a family that saved him from himself. It’s never too late to learn that growing old doesn’t have to mean growing up.”

Other sections: Pre-Portal, Post-Portal, Lost Journal pages + Ford's letters

[darkpoetrynprose]

“Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give, but cannot. All that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow part of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go.”

― Jamie Anderson

[technofeudalism]

i've got one more wall of text in me for today. i'm sorry, but hopefully this helps more people than it annoys.

i understand the concerns people have about social media being captured to technofascist oligarchs and i share them.

however, and you can call me a boomer for this if you'd like, i am way more worried about the fact that we are watching a scarier replay of the 2016 hyper-normalization of Donald Trump already being carried out in mainstream/establishment news outlets.

Some political operatives on the right, who saw mainstream media coverage of Trump’s first term as overly hostile, say the way the press covered Trump’s first term unwittingly did him a favor.   “I do expect that the media coverage will be a little different in tone,” one national Republican strategist told The Hill this week. “Not because the media is all of a sudden planning on being more objective and less biased, but because they probably finally recognize that their over-the-top hysterical coverage has done nothing but help Trump politically.”  

there are many reason this freaks me out worse, but i can sum up a couple of them.

the rhetoric this time is a magnitude more insane and suddenly alarmingly expansionist. logic would suggest this would justify an even more critical evaluation from the media that they are seemingly neglecting to provide.

the public, thanks to total dereliction of duty by the Democrats, are far more geared up for fascist shit than ever, but are totally ignorant to how this is going to happen (concentration camps)

speaking of the Democratic party: following a series of humiliating, high profile L's, the party finds themselves leaderless and less popular than they've been in 30 years at the worst time. when asked to name the leader of the Democratic Party, 49% of registered voters couldn’t name a person or said “nobody.”

before i continue, i know that there has been a dramatic decrease in people who get their news from traditional media and instead rely on social media, podcasts and the like. that makes sense. people aren't watching cable news anymore, chiefly because fewer and fewer people under the age of 30 even have cable TV and they definitely aren't paying for a New York Times subscription.

but what people fail to consider is that the "news" people consume via social media is often rehashed or half-baked, word of mouth versions of reporting conducted by the mainstream media or the journalists who work for them. there are still journalists working for these publications who take advantage of the increased exposure podcasts provide and go on them to talk about their writing.

people hear the same stories at the end of the day, but the way the issue is initially framed when the story first "breaks" and how it is approached by other outlets who follow up on it is significant. it's a lot less work to have to clean up and suppress news on your platform when the news is already favorable to your cause.

think along the lines of a massive disinformation campaign emerging from one outlet, social media being thrown into a complete frenzy and the only journalist who knows the truth from another outlet hesitating to speak out because of threats from his publisher to keep outrage revenue high or, perhaps more ominously, to directly serve the interest of the fascists in charge.

the US media has always been servile to whims of corporate interests because... well... they are owned by the corporate interests.

but up until today, i was holding out some sliver of hope that even if the NYT, for example, wasn't taking up antifascist actions, they would hold onto a tiny bit of reliability as a further watered down version of itself. an increasingly rare, delicate weapon against misinformation on social media, as opposed to being another tool wielded by fascists on aforementioned social media to grow legitimacy and manufacture consent.

then i saw this. my feeling is now that if the New York Times can't even write a headline - with THAT photograph underneath it - that says in plain English "Elon Musk Makes Nazi Salute Twice at Trump Inauguration," then there is going to be a frightening decrease in quality journalism being funded by mainstream outlets coming.

if you are not sure what to do and you want to be well informed, i have two suggestions. the first and most important, most difficult one that is a skill hard to master, is to develop decent media literacy and an ability to derive context from history.

the second is to build a network of trustworthy local, national and global sources that you can count on. ideally, they would be completely independent and free from editorial oversight or corporate control.

here are some of my recommendations. all of them are flawed. never rely on one source. do not immediately accept something as the truth from any single source. everyone is capable of accidentally getting a detail wrong, or even deliberately misleading.

Dropsite News - ran by Ryan Grim, Jeremy Scahill

The Intercept - sadly running out of money, alleged CIA ties

Democracy Now! - more center-left, better domestically

Jacobin - wide variety, sometimes shitty takes, Alex Press is great

The Grayzone - this one is controversial (mainly just to liberals) and they make no qualms about being committed to reporting from an anti-imperialist view of the world

Black Agenda Report - perspective from Black leftists. founded by Glen Ford (RIP), a Black Panther and accomplished investigative journalist

Hasan Piker - hate him, love him, neutral, doesn't matter. he's the largest independent political commentator on the left (by far), covering news and misinformation 9 hours a day. you can think he has shit takes, but he's still a reliable source and has been insanely accurate with his opinions

The Majority Report - been around forever, Sam Seder & Emma Vigeland are amazing, once home to the incredible Michael Jamal Brooks (RIP)

Breakthrough News

Labor Notes

Ben Norton @ Global Political Economy

Caitlin Johnstone (AUS)

these are just what i could come up with but there are many more if you do a little bit of digging using these as a baseline. just remember that the source ultimately is irrelevant and will have it's own biases. it is up to you to separate fact and fiction.

[kitkatpancakestack]

Don't forget

when you feel the sun on your back

to turn around

what's dead is dead and

the light is telling you:

"Only better things ahead."

—from a note I found that I wrote to myself when I was younger

[plaidos]

god there’s something deeply wrong with me i’ve been bit with the social games bug. for some reason my womb is telling me i need to play animal crossing for the gamecube and like. complete it. what the fuck is wrong with me. first stardew then sims 4 now this. who am i. who am i

[strawberrystepmom]

ngl being a kid was so hard for me bc I had such big feelings all the time and didn’t know what to do about it

[crowleaf]

Gonna try to germinate some decade-old bagseed.

I have some feminized seeds but I'm not confident in trying to grow them, not after the last attempt died before it even sprouted true leaves. And when I'm not sure I understand how to use coco coir yet.

So if these germ, any of them (trying three right now but I have a shit load more), I'm just gonna toss them into miracle-gro and see what happens.

I've done it before, years ago, and the results weren't bad considering my lack of grow light, the very limited sunlight available to a plant I had to hide, and a potting medium most recommend against for growing cannabis. It ended up being male, though, so the whole endeavor was kinda pointless.

These will probably end up being males too, if they're even still viable (I've had them stored in an empty pill bottle for years, but not exactly in very temp-controlled places). But who knows! Maybe one of them will surprise me. Either way, I just want to see what happens.

[solarpunkidealist]

9/7 they’ve sexed! Both girls. Plants are huge with the 5 gal still a lot bigger. Hopefully flower is soon, I’ve nearly run out of height

[thoughtsbysofi]

Who’s Parenting Who? Remember, You’re Their Child, Not Their Savior.

Your parents are not your responsibility. They never were.

There’s a phenomenon I’ve been noticing lately—call it the parent trap, if you will. It’s what happens when kids grow up feeling like they have to parent their own parents. Maybe it’s because they saw too much, too soon: the overdue bills, the endless hours at work, the stress etched into their mother’s face. And because kids are wired to make sense of things—no matter how senseless—this one thought starts to take root: It’s my fault. This is because of me.

And it doesn’t help that some parents—whether they mean to or not—fuel the guilt. “I work this hard so you can have everything,” they’ll say. “I do it all for you.” Sure, it sounds noble, but let’s be real: to a kid, it’s less “noble” and more, Great. I’m the reason they’re miserable.

So what does the kid do? They start carrying a weight they were never meant to bear. They don’t want Mom to feel overworked. They don’t want Dad to seem defeated. They want to help, to fix it, to be the reason their parents are okay. And before you know it, you’ve got a 14-year-old with the emotional load of a 40-year-old.

I picture that kid putting on their dad’s oversized shoes. They’re stumbling around, tripping on the laces, but they’re trying. Oh, they’re trying. They’ve convinced themselves they can handle it. But the truth is, those shoes? They don’t fit. They never will.

Fast-forward a few decades. That kid is now an adult, still carrying that same weight—guilt, obligation, a constant need to prove their worth. They think they owe their parents for everything. For raising them. For providing. For existing. They can’t shake the feeling that they’ve got a tab to settle.

But here’s the thing, and I need you to hear this loud and clear: You don’t owe your parents for being born. Your existence is not a debt.

If I could pour a martini and sit down with that grown-up kid—now drowning in oversized emotional baggage—I’d say this: Your only job was to be a child. That’s it. Not to be their therapist, or their savior, or their financial planner. Yes, show gratitude. Yes, be kind. But no, you don’t need to give your life away just because they gave you yours.

Take off those too-big shoes. Drop the backpack stuffed with guilt, shame, and the belief that you’re responsible for everyone else’s happiness. It was never yours to carry.

Everywhere you go, people are walking around carrying something—shopping bags, tote bags, emotional baggage. But the truth is, you don’t need to carry what’s not yours. You’ve got your own life to walk through, and trust me, that’s enough weight for anyone.

So here’s to giving yourself the freedom to breathe.

-xoxo