#grow guide

[hinamie]

I'll give them shelter like you've done for me

[schizmogenesis]

Becoming-trichome,

[warren-keplers-funk-band]

every time i want to be absolutely ruined, i just think about the fact that, despite being only five seasons, in-universe bbc's merlin spanned over a period of ten years.

ten years during which merlin dressed and undressed arthur every day. took care of his armour. stood and fastened the clasps when arthur was going out to battle. what imaginably could be more quietly intimate than that?

ten years during which merlin withstood being underestimated, withstood all that he had done for arthur being unacknowledged, just so he could stay by his side.

ten years during which the most powerful magical being in albion chose to stay by arthur's side as his manservant, and his friend. destiny be damned.

that utter devotion, loyalty to each other? arthur's reciprocated loyalty to and love for merlin despite the fact that, in his mind, he was just a human servant who hadn't saved his life nearly half as much as in reality?

I'M DEAD. BOWLED OVER. IN RUINS.

[nelkcats]

Distant family

Danny didn't quite know how to feel when his mother asked him if he wanted to go visit his aunt for a few days. He assumed it was his Aunt Alicia but apparently not, which didn't leave him with much of a choice as to who it might be. He wondered if it was safe to leave Amity for so long.

Later, his mother rectified herself by saying she was more of a distant aunt of sorts, which didn't help the halfa's confusion in the least but he ended up agreeing to it. Mainly because Jazz asked him to take a vacation.

That's how he found out his aunt was Wonder Woman, because sure, why not, Aunt Diana seemed to be just as curious about his existence but didn't tie him up in her shiny golden bow so Danny considered it a win.

Apparently his grandmother was an Amazon that left Themyscira after falling in love. His mom had met Diana when she was separated from her homeland as a sort of united group of exiled Amazons.

Danny wondered what that meant for Jazz's future, at least he had a story to tell Pandora, she would be proud of his origins...probably.

[bruhstation]

can't it even be more obvious thomas. why are you surprised that a sudrian historical site filled to the brim with armor and weaponry that dates back to the middle ages has old people afflicted with the gold dust working around the castle

[lachiennearoo]

How to Make Friends

A more-or-less clear guide on social interactions

Growing up with heavy ADHD and generalized anxiety, it was always a bit hard for me to make friends and socialize. Despite my yearning for friendship, I was always "the quiet one" and "a loner", simply because I didn't know how to approach certain social situations, and it made any friendship I had extremely unstable (except for my sister @vive-le-quebec-flouffi, who was so extroverted and friendly it was literally impossible to escape her clutches of socialization)

As I grew older, I learned through a lot of trial and error what makes a good friendship.

Or, rather... what's the best way for someone to WANT to be your friend (without being superficial or hypocritical.)

Now, obviously, this doesn't work for everyone. But this is what I found helped me the most in social circles (especially online) and I hope it can help others too

LET'S BEGIN!

1 - Be yourself

Now that sounds very cliche and cringe, I know, but hear me out, because my opinion on this is not the same as all those feelgood inspirational movies and ads.

"Being yourself" isn't as simple as it seems. Because after all, what does "self" imply? If someone is, say, a criminal, would "be yourself" mean that they should embrace their sinful side?

No, obviously not.

"Be yourself" is a bit more nuanced, but I'll try to boil it down for you.

It just means "be unashamed of your qualities which you think are flaws". For example, "be yourself" would apply to someone who sees themselves as ugly, or maybe someone with an odd yet unharmful hobby, or a weird sense of fashion, or someone with say a handicap, a speech impediment. "Be yourself" is a sentence for the specific people who have genuine good in them, but are afraid to show it to others because they have been persecuted in the past, or are scared to be. It does NOT mean to accept genuine flaws. "Be yourself" does not include say violent anger issues, an addiction, a recent crime committed, or a generally unpleasant personality. Those are obviously not things to encourage. You can understand they may be a thing that happen to you, and accept it in your life, but that's different from being proud of it or encouraging it.

Speaking of personalities... let's talk about that

2 - Be kind

Now when some people hear that, they think it means "always smile no matter what, always look happy and positive, always agree with everyone just so you don't hurt their feelings, and never cause any drama", like you're Deku in My Hero Academia or Steven Universe in his titular show.

But that's... not quite that.

Obviously, kindness is something you use to help people feel better, to cheer up, and feel happy, and obviously to be kind, you need to have compassion, heart, empathy, and always put yourself in other people's shoes regardless of who they are. But it is not necessarily all-encompassing.

There's a rule that I think anyone learning kindness must learn. It's that sometimes, kindness means to be firm.

Not mean, of course. Not judgmental, not insensitive. Don't insult anyone, don't belittle or patronize anyone or make them feel inferior to you. That's still very rude and that's not what you want.

But what I mean is that sometimes, if you know that a person's actions towards something are wrong, especially if it's towards someone else, you must be able to point it out, and act accordingly. Don't just stand there and agree with them just because you don't want to hurt their feelings. You must still be able to know right from wrong. Kindness just means you won't be an ass about it, it doesn't mean to stay silent.

Hey, that brings me to point three!

3 - Show your own opinions

If there's one thing people hate just as much as meanness, it's those who stand by and do nothing about it.

Regardless of if you agree with them or not, if you say absolutely nothing when genuinely bad behaviour is happening, out of fear of "starting a fight", you are actively making the person who is being attacked feel alone.

I remember myself, when I was bullied in the first two grades of secondary school (11-13 years old for those who don't know) for "being ugly", I was told by my mother (who was friends with other kid's parents) that some of the kids "didn't hate me" and "didn't agree with the bullying". And I asked her "if they don't hate me, why won't they talk to me?" She never managed to answer that one. And it broke my heart, because outside of my sister, I had no one else.

Don't be like that. You may be scared of acting, but you know who would be grateful if you did act? The victims. And isn't their opinion of you much more important than the opinion of someone who acts with hatred and bigotry?

If you see someone suffering injustice, or even just hear someone who has a rather harmful opinion, don't be scared to tell them that you disagree. Obviously don't be an asshole about it, stay civil, but if you voice out your opinion, you will be seen as someone who stays true to their beliefs and is brave enough to stand up for them if the opportunity comes.

There's obviously much more that comes with social life (nonverbal cues, sense of humor, timing and mood), and I don't know everything (I'm just some random québécois girl on the internet). But I hope this was a bit more helpful. I did have fun writing this, at least. So I guess that's better than nothing!

[4-diamonds]

they'd be so toxic together

[cienie-isengardu]

Sokka's sexism

Sokka’s sexism from the earliest episodes is an interesting case, because the Southern Water Tribe, at least from what was presented to us on screen, doesn’t seem to operate that much on gender roles? Especially when compared to the Northern Water Tribe?

I mean, yeah, warriors (men) went to war, while women, children and the elders stayed at home. But as Hama’s story shows, when Fire Nation attacked Southern Water Tribe, both female and male benders were fighting against invaders arm to arm and it seems like they were the actual first line of defense there, not the non-bender warriors.

In contrast, during siege of North Pole, in the final of Book 1: Water, we don’t see any female bender helping defend their home except Katara, who was involved in protecting Aang when he was in Spirit World.

Since all the waterbenders were captured from the Southern Tribe, it makes sense that non-bender warriors stepped in and got involved with war, while the kids and elders were left under women’s care.

Another example comes from “a ceremonial test of wisdom, bravery and trust”, known as ice dodging. As Bato explained, it is a rite of passage for young Water Tribe members and in their village “done by weaving a boat through a field of icebergs.” When a child turns 14, their father was supposed to take them to ice dodging, so they could earn their mark. Though the episode itself was focused on Sokka’s ceremony, Bato never specified it as something that boys alone should do and not only Katara (girl) but also Aang (outsider) is allowed to take part in the ritual. Once Sokka proved himself, everyone of their group got a mark, as a sign they passed the test. Interesting thing to note, since Bato did not specify it is a rite of passage for boys alone, it suggests girls were expected to know how to sail in boats of the Southern Water Tribe. Of course, again, war didn’t allow to continue this tradition as men (Hakoda, in case of Sokka & Katara) left to fight against Fire Nation.

Later, when Sokka and Katara reunited with their father, Hakoda did not try to send away Katara nor relegate her to just a medic job during the invasion. In Northern Water Tribe episodes, we learned that teaching for waterbenders there was defined by gender - women were allowed to learn only how to heal, while men how to use their bending in fight. Hakoda, nor Bato nor other of their warriors even for a moment questioned Katara’s presence on the battlefield nor the presence of women in the ranks of their allies like a blind, 12 years old Toph or the female water benders from Swamps or female(?) soldier from Earth Kingdom

And during battle, Katara did not fight in rank with other soldiers, she first alone secured Appa during submarine attack, then alongside her brother and father took down guardhouses - Hakoda himself told her and Sokka to attack one when he took down the other one

showing how much he trusted his 15 years old son and 14 years old daughter while ordering them attack on Fire Nation adult soldiers hidden in well guarder place.

Later, when Hakoda got seriously injured and Sokka temporary took the command of their forces, we could see that Hakoda relied on Katara to follow his troops and not ever once tried to send her back “to safety” or argued she should leave him behind, as often it happens with heroic (male) figures. Quite the opposite. When Katara offered him to “wait here if you want”, Hakoda firmly said “I want to press forward with the others”, which meant his daughter needed to come with him directly into an already ongoing fight (even if they stayed more at the rear of their army, they were still on battlefield).

She and her brother, alongside with the youngest members of Invasion, were forced to flee on Appa once the battle was lost, but no other adult woman was included. During Zuko’s coronation, when all war prisoners were released, in the background we could again see the female character(s) from Swamps.

And let's not forget how impressive Hakoda was by Suki when she single-handedly captured the warden at Boiling Rock prison and did not try to stop her from fighting against Ty Lee alongside Zuko and Sokka against Azula.

Understandably, we have no idea how the Southern Water Tribe and its culture looked like before the war, even arguably, the characters themselves may not have a clear idea due to growing up in dire times. But my point is, Hakoda and Bato, the two main adult Southern Water Tribe’s warriors that Avatar: The Last Airbender allowed us to know more about, have never shown any direct sexism toward Katara or other female characters. And though Sokka was the oldest boy at their village, there is no reason to think women did not hunt in absence of men, because one person would not be able to provide for a whole community 24/7. Also, as Hama proved, the Southern Water Tribe’s waterbenders were capable of fighting and their gender did not play any vital role the way it happened in their sister tribe at North Pole. 

Of course, Fire Nation’s repeated attacks affected residents of South Pole and their living conditions but from the little bits the show gave us, I think it is correct to assume if Sokka grew up with Hakoda around to guide him as he should, his behavior would be different from the sexism and dismissive attitude toward Katara or Kyoshi Warriors. For one, logically thinking Southern Water Tribe’s warriors need to do all the cooking, sewing and keeping their camp clean all on their own during war so it is not a “girly job” but a vital part of a warriors skills to survive and ensure their equipment is in the best condition. But Sokka doesn’t know it, because there is no one to teach him the importance of those skills. All Sokka had was father’s farewell words to cling to - and I’m not sure if Hakoda truly expected his son to be able to protect Katara and the village in his absence, or he just tried to make Sokka feel a bit less depressed about being left behind. You know, by giving him purpose and a Big Important Job to focus on and to feel needed and trusted. 

Which leads me to think that Sokka’s sexism is not rooted in Southern Water Tribe’s culture itself, but in his own insecurity and pressure of being the oldest boy in the village. If girls could be warriors - and be better than him - it would put into question all his self-worth, purpose and the trust given by father. Once Sokka met Kyoshi Warriors and later all the skilled girls, it challenged him on a very personal level, but he accepted the truth and moved on and alongside, finally became a true warrior and a man. 

And I find it indeed an interesting case, as Sokka’s sexism and dismissal of girls is not necessarily stemming from the culture he is part of, but rather is the effect of not knowing said culture & pre-war history of his Tribe. And of course, from his own insecurity. 

[justaz]

merlin raised by druids and being The Androgyn, you ponder it for a while and painstakingly come to the conclusion that you're staring at a woman. blink. you're looking at a man. long, luscious hair that morgana and gwaine are jealous of. pretty eyes and full lips. sharp cheekbones. uther's teachings that echo in arthur's mind and have been quieting over the years going dead silent the moment he sees merlin.

[shift-shaping]

I just don't think spoilers for the first six hours of a game that is probably going to be ten times that length is an issue. Like sorry to the people for whom this is a world-shattering problem I guess I'm just built different.

[gummi-ships]

Kingdom Hearts 0.2 Birth by Sleep - A Fragmentary Passage - Depths of Darkness

[tenofmuses]

I just saw a TikTok just now about “how to become a witch,” with a list of steps for beginners to follow. The first two things on the list were to buy books on witchcraft, and then to buy a bunch of materials. So here’s me reminding you that you don’t need to buy anything to become a witch. Sure, buying the tools is fun and all, but it isn’t a requirement to getting started. Witchcraft is a spiritual practice, not a consumerist hobby.

[kanrix]

I've read some of your posts (I love your art by the way) and as a Clay simp I have to say I HATE ARTHUR PUPPINGTON MY GOD, AS MUCH AS CLAY HAD BEEN A SPOILED BRAT YOU CAN'T JUST IGNORE A FCKING CHILD AAAAAcbsknx The old man needed to mature instead of seeing a 12-year-old as competition

I get Arthur puppington but this old man should be upset at his wife not at the 12 year old who's been sheltered, spoiled and tricked into believing everyone should kneel down for him his whole life, that kid literally does not know any better

[puppetmaster13u]

have a very early wip of a tea party :>

This is @phoenixcatch7 's Possessed Doll Au

[solargeist]

It hurt in the beginning, but it hurt much MUCH more later on. You aren't even really aware that things are happening to you. They are subtle like that. After all, They have had the chance to prefect this process down to almost the second of becoming like Them.

Unfortunately, the perfected method is very painful. You feel it in your bones. Just a dull ache that makes you think of growing pains as a child. Something that once was easy to do; no longer works for how your body is structured (like climbing a tree or how when you used to cry, it would always be with tears that made your face too hot).

The shift from bones to being in your muscles would seemingly happen over night. Tendons feeling too rubbery and bendable and cartilage always became brittle. The nosebleeds became normal, and you are reassured that it is normal. (After all, it is to them.)

Eventually, it buzzes under your skin. Sometimes it feels like a phone vibrating under anywhere that might have blood, but then others it's impossible not to think of their being insects just under the first layer. (There are no bugs in the End. You know that. At least, you haven't seen any Endermites...) You hear it in your ear drums. Your teeth rattle ever so slightly in a way that makes your jaw hurt. The perpetual motion makes stomachs easier to upset and falling asleep almost impossible.

But eventually, after sitting too long in discomfort, you find out the meaning of these sorenesses. It is so much easier to mold something if it has been made pliable. They desire to bend, to snap, to stretch you as far as you'll go and then go farther.

Watchers are massive things in their fullness. Large and hulking creatures that can blot out the sun at their full hight. But one simply does get to being that size naturally. No, they had to be pulled up; spines and fingers being elongated, arms and legs extending out, and smiles made even wider to show more teeth.

The smile is why Grian doesn't ever bother having one shown. He hates to remember hooks pulling at his cheeks.

-Phantom

The way you go from DMing me to put him in a microwave, to this, is always fascinating, really, a littol gift to me 🫶

I think the Watcher holds his hair back when he’s sick, or gently rubs his back when he’s sore, even though it’s their fault he’s like this!!

[your-local-bookworm]

Remember when growing up was .... exciting?