#genuinely this is the only way I can feel this as an adult.
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dondusthefirstconsul · 2 days ago
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Yes Lucilla and Acacius please save Rome!! And holy shit I can't wait to read everything that Acacius has on his heart, all the things he's going to say to the twins. It must be very therapeutic to him to finally tell them exactly what he thinks about them and their horrid ruling of the empire. Yes! Go off Acacius! Also can't wait to read how the twins react.......oh gods.
Speaking of Acacius and the twins, honestly I can't even begin to fathom what it would be like for Caracalla to have a father figure and how he would interact with one. Especially if it's someone as amazing as Acacius. Like you said he's such a strong leader, stern but understanding and caring. From the movie we've seen him delight in irritating Acacius and at first lowkey horny for Macrinus until shit got fucked up and he started viewing Macrinus as a caring father..... Yeah I have no idea what he would act like with Acacius. Can't wait to read about that 😭😭
Oh Geta my love!!! Yes he'll yet be a good leader with Acacius' training and teaching. He likely would begin to understand what makes a good ruler, what kind of virtues a good ruler has and how to act the part. Unfortunately Caracalla has never shown signs of being in touch with reality enough that he could be taught those things. In the script he says something in the lines of "we give them everything, what does she give them?" when people applaud Lucilla so much louder than them. Either he was genuinely oblivious to how they deprived the people of resources and food to conquer more land etc or he thought what they gave them should be enough??
Yes Lucilla would be the perfect ruler if only she could be💔 She's so courageous and so strong and just and righteous. Lucilla truly is the Lady of Rome. She doesn't act with vengeance or malice. She'll sacrifice herself willingly for the greater good Lucilla you beautiful person. Her role in this story is so painful and gruelling. Oh how much Lucilla must see of Commodus in the twins, in their actions and ways, their hunger for power, their cruelty and bloodlust, but also in their desperation for love, appreciation, approval, and affection. Commodus was terrible to her and treated her abhorrently but she still cared for him. Like Commodus the twins wanted to control her and own her, it's a wonder if she has it in her heart to forgive them and maybe even grow to care for them.
And of course there is the matter of Caracalla....... I wonder if Caracalla would learn how to behave around Lucilla. How does one even tell a full grown adult man that you should not behave in such a manner and that some things should not be said out loud. Caracalla has a very unashamed character and does not hide his feelings much. I wonder if he is even capable of feeling shame and guilt? It will get very awkward very fast if he doesn't learn how to respect boundaries. HIS FACE WHEN HE LOOKS AT LUCILLA IS SO oh gods it's so amusing thinking about him behaving inappropriately towards her and Acacius getting mad. I also have no idea how he would learn to see her platonically and familiarly only, given his afflictions. I mean actions can be learnt to control but how can thoughts and feelings be controlled? It's a difficult thing, when one associates parental care and affection with sexual feelings. Something as subconscious as sexuality is not easy to "train away". As much as I find the "does he want a mommy or a mommy? Yes" jokes really funny I also think it's so tragic he's been deprived of parental love so badly that he's started to associate it like this.
Your writing is so beautiful even in such short form 😭♥️ Poor Caracalla, Geta is so mean. I love how dramatic Geta is. He'll never forgive the traitors! Sure you won't baby. (I'm partly joking, he isn't even that dramatic, he's right they were betrayed. I just love when he's dramatic.)
unhinged concept (I'm entering that stage): Lucilla actually does adopt Geta and Caracalla which ruins Acacius's life but also makes him their step-father and they finally get an actual father figure who teaches them how the fuck to hold swords and not be the worst people ever.
and we just cancel Macrinus entirely, which, I don't know what the hell happens to Lucius but that's someone else's unhinged concept to worry about.
And we put Caracalla on a leash because the boy cannot behave. That's no way to treat your mother
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tubborucho · 10 hours ago
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Hey you're like the only mcyt blogger I follow and I genuinely am not into any of that stuff so can you PLEASE explain what the fuck is going on?
first of all, it is crazy to me that i am somehow anyone's only mcyt lmao
I will not go into a lot of details with explanation because it's actually worth like several hours essay video at this point, but as short as i can:
Dream is a minecraft youtuber, mainly known for manhunt series and creating the server Dream SMP. In recent, like, 2(?) years he has been in controversy after controversy, where he was revealed to genuinely be not a good person, very manipulative with his friends and his viewers (<- whixh is why he still has a huge cult-like fan base defending him like their life depends on it). Due to that he's been basically dropped by a lot of other content creators, like Tommy and Tubbo.
Tommy and Tubbo were both part of the Dream SMP and worked closely with Dream in the past. Tommy also looked up to Dream as a mentor and they used to have hours long calls about yt. Tommy was 16-18 at the time. Dream was 21-23.
Recently Tommy started speaking up about all the adults that were not good role models to him during that age, mainly joking about it or on his podcast. Dream was one of those adults.
Now, the most recent drama started because Tommy was having a twitter beef with OTHER creators that had NOTHING to do with Dream, and Dream popped up with a meme that was basically calling Tommy's whole 15million audience an r-slur. Like, he used that slur.
That started a backlash, multiple people were rightfully going What The Fuck. Tubbo was one of those people, starting one of his streams by talking about it. It was like and hour and something long.
That night (for Europe) Dream went on and made a 3 hours long stream talking about all the dramas he has ever had in a completely infuriating way and misconstrued some of Tubbo's words he said during his stream to make it seem like Tubbo was also against Tommy and stuff.
Tubbo then proceeded to react to this 3 hours stream in a 6 hours vod. Being genuinely baffled by a lot pf stuff. During that stream Tommy posted a five minutes video where he addressed Dream. I recommend just watching it, it's very short.
Dream was actually supposed to come on Tubbo's stream and discuss stuff on call, because Tubbo in general had been very generous at how much benefit of the doubt he was giving Dream, trying to be as fair as possible. Dream backed out, because he started working on a response video to Tommy.
That video is 10 minutes long. It is full of blatant lies and misinformation plus a lot of editing choices specifically made to make you feel for Dream and look at Tommy as just some annoying clown (<- mainly music). Misinformation and lies included stuff like cropping out private messages to use them as proof for otherwise not just unbased but disproved statements, using screenshots of invoices that in fact did not relate to the situation Dream was describing and were paid BY TUBBO for a COMPLETELY UNRELATED THING.
Tubbo is now reacting to that.
I hope this is informative enough, there is genuinely so much going on, I did not mention like 85% of it.
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bunnyinvanilla · 15 hours ago
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hello!! i hope this is okay and that you’re taking requests because i absolutely adore your writing! your relationship with God and spirituality is also really special to me, i love to see how you connect with Him <3
could i please request a comfort fic, perhaps about sweet reader having subdrop and aftercare fluff? or just any sweet fluff with the dynamic you write. i hope you’re doing well, thank you for the wonderful content!!
I saw this req this morning and it made me smile sooo much, thank you for the kind and sweet words bubble bee, im genuinely head over heels over this message <333 im glad you can see through how special my relationship with God is, he’s literally my comfort person and i love showing how much he means to me and how much i love him, he’s so good and kind and caring ૮ ⸝⸝o̴̶̷᷄ ·̭ o̴̶̷̥᷅⸝⸝ ྀིა by the way, i love writing about daddy price in the ddlg setting, id regress all the time with him 🐰
🍼 | ddlg, agere dynamic, sugar daddy dom!john price x sugar baby little!fem reader, pure fluff, laaarge age gap, reader is 21 and john is in his mid 40s, might not be everyone’s cup of tea, but shows what their relationship also consists of.
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you only wanted to be held, loved and protected by a strong, old and gruff man :( and sugar daddy!john price was the best caregiver ever to toy.
you were his little girl, so young and innocent, didn’t want to worry about adult life :( could be his princess in peace n let him handle all the responsibilities that came with being an grown up.
those burdens and life expectancies stilled the moment you sat down on john’s lap, recharging your little self, and basking in your daddy’s attention — he could read you with a single glance, the redness of your cheeks, the way your eyelids grew a bit heavier, your fidgety movements and incoherent mumbles, your clinginess, they all spoke volumes about your needs.
he moved his lips to your temple, pressing a few kisses on top of your head, his mustache was pressed against your hair, rubbing it affectionately “what’s wrong, sweetheart? feeling little, mmh?”
you nodded against his chest, curled up like a lap bunny, your legs swinging over his — you had to act like a big girl outside, just to come back home to him and sink deep into sub space. ૮꒰っ˕‹̥̥̥ ꒱ა
“dont wanna do anything today, sir,” you closed your eyes took a deep breath, enjoying the feeling of his muscular, chiseled chest radiating warmth against your body, his bulging arms holding you close to him.
“have to study, but i just wanna lie down ‘n rest, read my books, watch cartoons n drink hot cocoa..don’t wanna be an adult, it’s tiring, wanna be carefree, live the kind of life God has promised us,” you snuggled your face against his pectorals, and his arm quickly moved to your head, large and warm as it begun to caress your hair, brush it with his bare fingers
“I know, doll face, don’t have to worry about a single thing, sweet girl, just be daddy’s little girl, you have me to take care of you” he pressed another kiss to your temple, and you lifted your head from his chest, pushing your bottom lip out and looking at his lips, letting him lower his head and meet your lips with eager compliance,
you titled your head to give him more access, and his tongue pushed deep into your mouth, pressing against yours, making you pour a soft, delicate whine into his mouth, which he quickly took possession of, devouring it.
he pulled away, your lips only inches apart, his warm, breath caressing your flushed, red cheeks, but you wanted another one, neediness flowing into your body and making you even clingier — you pressed your mouths together again, open mouthed kisses that he accepted with an amused, entertained expression, his sharp, intense eyes never leaving you.
“careful, angel, might give this old man a heart attack with all this affection,” his gruff joke, mumbled roughly, made you giggle against his lips, and you gave him a sweet smile, your eyes as glittery as those sticker sheets you — unexplainably to him — liked to collect.
“can you use your words to tell daddy what you need right now baby, mmh? wanna be my little girl?”
you nodded shyly, your fingers playing with the strap of his watch, “ben n Jerry’s…”
“wanna eat ice cream on daddy’s lap? your favorite flavor?”
“yes daddy, please” you nodded again and gave him your puppy pleading eyes, feeling appreciative for his understanding and deep, gentle love towards you — he was such a fierce, bulky man that only learned how to be gentle with his hands to hold you, his little princess :(
“your wish is my command, my lady, come here,” he stood up, effortlessly carrying you with him and locking your legs around his waist with a single arm, “I’ll get your favorite stuffie, probably wonders where his momma is, mmh?”
(っ˃̣̣̥ -˂̣̣̥ς)
“sleepy,” you mumbled against his neck, letting him carry you with minimal no effort — he chuckled deeply, and patted your butt playfully, “yeah babygirl, nap time after ice cream, so daddy can go do some work stuff, deal?”
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shaunashpmn · 1 day ago
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thankyou so much for the tag!
1. team psychological all the way. i wouldn’t be surprised if they make it more supernatural, but if so i’m hoping they go for something more like the mining theory (which s3 trailers are making seem more and more likely!) than the occult. i just think there’s so much more to explore and enjoy!
2. teen shauna and adult nat. i love adult shauna and teen nat as well, but i think both of them are such powerful characters and their stories have the most impact in those timelines! shauna’s baby storyline and nat’s recovery/death storyline??? insane. and so compelling
3. there’s SO many! my favourite is probably climbing up the walls for the bacchanal scene bc it’s such an insane choice lyrically (“you know we’re friends till we die • and either way you turn, i’ll be there • open up your skull, i’ll be there • climbing up the walls”) and such a cool way to link in a sort of ‘jackie’s perspective’ as the whole point is that they can now never truly get rid of her
4. i have to say jackieshauna, but in a “not friends, not lovers, but a secret other third thing” way!
5. s2e7. always. there’s not a scene in that episode i wouldn’t call one of my favourites.
6. natalie for sure. it seems obvious and i know it’s likely it won’t be her, but i truly do think it’s the best choice. it’s the only option that truly makes sense to me in the context of the adult timeline - it can’t be shauna, because she isn’t supposed to be winning ever!
7. the scene of them all dancing and partying in the adult timeline cutting into the scene of shauna beating up lottie. genuinely insane. it happens at such a key point in the show and the bittersweetness of the older characters finally reconnecting with their innocence as they lose it in the teen timeline?? heartbreaking. i love it.
8. i have a LOT…but my main one is that van is dying of cancer in episode 10. either that or someone else kills her to end her suffering in some way. i don’t want her to die but i also don’t want them to miraculously cure her! also a jane widdop/laura lee stunt double is credited for episode 10 and i just know someone is dying :( !!
9. i don’t think i’m like any one of them in particular but i’d say somewhere between shauna, nat and taissa :)
10. probably when i was at a party when the s3 trailer came out and i shut myself in the bathroom with my headphones so i could watch it bc i was NOT waiting😭😭
11. shauna wasn’t in the wrong for what she said to jackie and i’m sick of people acting like it was unjustified 😣😣 yes it wasn’t jackie’s fault that shauna felt that way!! but the point of that scene is that it’s not about jackie and shauna’s relationship, it’s about shauna. she’s a teenage girl who has spent her entire life in the shadows and is now in an impossibly horrifying situation that she feels like she can’t even feel scared about because she knows she should just be feeling guilty. she’s going to lash out, and jackie is the obviously the person she lashes out at! again i don’t think jackie deserved to have to take it at all, but i also don’t think shauna was unjustified in letting it out!
tags: @vanpalmerenthusiast @fearsomeandwrong @cassmouse @nattylvr @thechosenthree @stqrca
Starting a Yellowjackets tag!
I want to get my mind off of things so: If you want, answer any or all of the questions below and tag 10 people (or however many you want) who also might want to share! I would love to see what you guys have to say!
1. Are you team Rational or Supernatural?
2. Who is your favorite teen timeline character? Favorite adult timeline character?
3. What is your favorite needledrop?
4. What is your favorite ship?
5. What is your favorite episode?
6. Who do you want the Antler Queen to be?
7. What is your favorite scene in the entire series?
8. A theory or prediction you have about Season 3?
9. Which character do you relate to the most, and why?
10. What is the craziest thing you’ve done in the name of Yellowjackets?
Bonus:
11. What’s your most controversial Yellowjackets take?
Here’s mine!
1. I am mostly Team Rational because I love the way this show depicts trauma but I also love seeing the supernatural side of things through the survivors’ eyes if that makes sense.
2. Natalie in the teen timeline because I love her compassion and softness underneath the front she puts on. Lottie in the adult timeline because I love her internal battle with herself and how afraid she is of her own mind. Misty is a close second in the adult timeline!
3. “Cornflake Girl” playing while Nat sees the mossy tree for the first time, Callie seeing the Adam Martin driver’s license in the barbecue, and Shauna eating Jackie’s ear. It just goes so perfectly with everything that’s going on (especially the elevated piano while Nat and Travis are scaling the mountain and the lyrics while Shauna takes the bite!)
4. LottieNat is my favorite ship I can’t help it Nat and Lottie are my favorite characters so having them together is a dream (TaiVan, JackieShauna, and TravNat are up there, too).
5. 1x09 “Doomcoming” is just amazing and captures everything I love about Yellowjackets. I love when they let the girls go batshit crazy, hoping we get more Doomcoming vibes in S3.
6. I want the Antler Queen to be Natalie because that would show a true descent for her in the Wilderness from being the most morally grounded one to the leader of the group at their most unhinged and primal. But honestly I think that Shauna might be the AQ after all…
7. I think the Jackie-eating scene is the best in the entire show. The “Climbing Up the Walls” song choice, the bacchanal feast flashes as a way of coping with the horror of what they’re doing, seeing them go fully feral for the first time, it’s such a well crafted scene.
8. I know this probably won’t happen but I’m just going to throw it out there that Cabin Daughter is alive and she will be revealed to have been Javi’s “friend”!
9. I relate to Shauna the most because I also admittedly have a bit of an obsessive/intense personality and I, too, internalize my emotions to a very unhealthy degree sometimes. I also grew up being in love with my childhood best friend who is very, very much like Jackie (and now we have been dating for 7 years!)
10. Mine is a mix of going to a Yellowjackets panel and sitting like 5 feet from the showrunners, doing everything in my power to score early screening tickets to Heretic and Companion, and pretending I was sick so I could go home early from work the day that the S3 trailer came out.
11. The male characters on this show get too much hate🫢 I like Travis, Jeff, Kevyn, and Walter (even though his introduction and storyline are rushed and forced). I don’t like them more than the female characters, but I like them nevertheless and appreciate their contributions to the plot.
No pressure tags! (I’m tagging 15 bc I feel like it) @before-it-felt-like-a-sin @baked-potatoes-rule @jackiesnats @deerest-deer @whodoesnataliehave @stilllsage @fairytwles @glitterfairy-21225 @lesbianforlottie @tr4vnat @lauraleetaylor @cassioo @natsboygirlfriend @soapyjackets @pinkkkkat @natgf123 +literally anyone else who wants to!
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0809sysblings · 6 months ago
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maybe this will get rocks thrown at me but i kinda hate when people call the 18+ prisoners "grown adults" as insults and ways to like... shut down any sympathy with them. how because they are "grown adults", they "should have known better". this has just always bothered me. i see it and i have to sit and stare at the wall for 10 minutes.
like. idk. being an adult does not automatically give you skills like Emotional Regulation, Impulse Control, Ability To Learn From Consequences, Ability To Plan For The Future, Critical Thinking, Interpersonal Skills, etc etc. you have to be Taught these things no matter how old you are. if you are not taught these things, and you are not supported in an environment that helps you further develop these things... you just. Aren't gonna be able to do them well.
adults just, typically, have accumulated enough experiences in life to have been able to learn these things. but not every adult has had that privilege. or some adults have had to just shut off the parts of their brain that would allow them to learn these things to be able to function at a basic level.
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icewindandboringhorror · 1 year ago
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sneeping with his legs up over his head for some reason... weird boye
#cats#love the second picture... skrungly sleepy well rested boye face...#since he's an elderly boy now sometimes when he wakes up from a nap he looks a bit scruffy and squinty eyed#Hard to beleive he's like 15 though.. he still looks like a kitten to me.. due to his giant round creature eyes and childlike demeanor#I think it's interesting that like... baby cats are babies. kittens are kittens. and you can tell a cat is like 'young adult' phase#looking from like a few months to maybe 1yr or 2yrs.. but after that they just always look the same to me#a 5 yr old cat is a 10 yr old cat is a 15 year old cat. unless the cat in question is particulalry aged or youthful#I still have so so little energy... it's been icy here this week. like not even FUN but just scary icy even thoguh i lOOOVE the cold#and its my favorite weather. I think it'd be okay actually if I had a woodburning stove/fireplace/hearth thing. literally thats my only#concern with the power going out. I genuinely don't mind stuff like having to go to the bathroom in buckets or cook over a fire or do other#less conveninet things. Its just that if eveyrhtng is electric then you have no way to cook and all of that. well.. and I literally need#background noise to go to sleep lest my ocd sprials become so loud I am slowly driven into maddness.. but a few battery packs or something#and a phone with one downloaded video I could play on repeat is fine for that. I dont need internet. ANYWAY.. so so sad that my fav#orite season ever (winter) is here. and the first cold of the winter is like... just an ice storm that you cant even walk in. I#love like 4 feet of snow where you can play in it and stuff. But just a thin flat sheet of a few inches of ice over every imaginable surfac#is not really playable. the wind speeds are so high and so many trees fall it's actually not that safe to go hang out outside anyway unless#you were in a totally clear open field. which is SAD also because i love ice and high winds. i love to stand out there and get whipped in t#he face with ice crystals and feel like I'm in some dramatic movie or something. but alas.. the threat of being attacked by a falling tree.#I did go out some but again it's like. literallyyou cant walk on it. so I just squatted and dragged myself along the ground lol#One of my stories has a whole section where the main characters are trapped in a deadly cold environment for a week and have to use magic#to survive and etc. etc. so I'm always like.. ouuu.. I should go in the ice.. it's Writing Research actually.. *foolishly gets frostbite*#THOUGH yesterday I went on a harrowing evil journey down a bunch of icy hilly roads to go check on some person's cat because the cat#had been left in the house for like 5 days at that point with nobody to check on them and nobody else seemed to want to do anything#about it (like call all of the neighbors or try to get someone out there) so I just went myself with a roommate who agreed to drive me.#It seemed acting totally normal and I gave it more food and water but.. I am still worried about it.. Apparently the person will be able#to get back to their house tomorrow but.. I dont trust them. But I couldnt take the cat with me because it's like.. a stranger's cat#basically and also no carrier + very skittish.. so I feared if I just tried to carry them bare handed they'd definitely leap from my grasp#and then it'd be like.. sliding on a sheet of ice chasing a cat and so on.. I still think they need to be watched for health issues tho >:|#ANYWAY.... many cat adventures lately... and strange weather... I wish for a normal week without always so many Things Happening.. augh
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slime-hoe · 3 months ago
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I am once again brought down to my knees by the knowledge that Billy Hargrove would 100% vibe with WAP if only because it’s exceptionally vulgar and makes people horny and or embarrassed .
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dirtytransmasc · 16 hours ago
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this this this!!!
they're all genuinely so lucky that Spider is as good hearted and loyal to the Na'vi and the Resistance as he is, because there are very few people in his life actually giving him any reason to stick around. outside of the sully kids, and even then, the whispers surrounding him have seemingly turned Neteyam at least partly away from him, are the only people who value him, genuinely. and even they can't truly out him first, because they are children, his little siblings, who depend on him and have adults dictating their lives at every turn.
no one else has ever valued Spider, outside of convenience. no one bats an eye in his direction, nor a wink of true concern. and within the humans and Omatikayan, Spider is treated like an odd duck. too Human and too Na'vi, but also too little of either, to fit in any where. no one truly wants him. and he doesn't want to be locked up in Hellsgate.
Quaritch is the first person, the first adult and authority figure, in his life to just. accept him. want him. give two shits about him. and he's terrible about it. Quaritch is a very fucked up individual, and even if he's doing his absolute best, it's always going to be displayed in fucked up behavior. but he was trying. he was trying to be better for his son, in his own ways. he accepted his son. he showed interest in his son's interests. he protected him. he loved him. he allowed him to stay within his home just a little while longer. he was merciful for him. he was never too much or not enough. Q never expected him to change, never asked if of him. he allowed him to deny his name and paint himself blue and wear what he wanted and carry his bow and speak his language. without question.
no one else has done a fraction of that for Spider.
and Spider gets to feel genuine parental love for the first time in his life (that he can remember). he's hooked. even if he hates that man in the end. he's hooked. he's 16 and in so much pain, mental, emotional, physical pain. he's been unloved so long. unloved children harbor genuine scars in their mind. in their hearts. their bodies don't develop correctly. their nervous system is fried.... and for a moment, such a short moment in the grand scheme of things, that pain is dulled. relieved. Q did that for him.
I can't blame him for having that sliver of mercy for him. I can't blame him for not being able to watch the one person who has truly given a shit about you die, to metaphorically drown him yourself. I understand. how could you not?
and that puts every adult within the Eastern resistance to shame. they all failed a child so badly, that Miles Quaritch has outdone them. they've essentially become a self fulfilling prophecy in terms of making Spider "into his father" (cause that's how they'll likely try to view Spider saving him).
I hope he gets to stand by his decision. I hope he gets to be angry. I hope he gets to show that he is just as loyal to the Na'vi as he always has been, even if he can't look any of the adults that treated him like a monster or a burden his entire life in the eye with an ounce of true respect. I hope he can find someone who actually gives a shit about him, and deserves to have him in their lives (aka. not Jake. fuck his son for a son bullshit. stay away from my kid).... do I think any of that will happen next movie? no. but I'll hope despite it.
I find it deeply depressing that every adult in Spider's life had children, yet he was never anyone's priority. every adult he could and most likely attempted to match in to. the adults he remembered as the closest things he had to parents since birth (Jake and Norm, even if they weren't acting as his parents, because Spider, genuinely, would not know better). down to his actual foster family (the McCoskers). essentially went out of their way to de-prioritize him.
like I'm not faulting them for having kids, for having a family. but Spider was their first priority. he didn't need to be adopted by any of them, per say, but he was their responsibility. he was their orphan, Jake especially, considering he was the chief of his people, but Norm as well, seeing as he's a prominent figure head of the clan/Hellsgate.
the McCoskers took him in, but over the years, as they had their own children, he was more and more neglected. he was now no longer his actually appointed guardians priority. and that only gets worse and worse as he ages until they become outright abusive (Nash does anyway, cause thats what I'm gonna call violently kidnapping his, throwing him in a room and locking him there, and trying to kill all of them, him included, when they run away. as abuse. and I'll get back to the whole "you have to turn yourself in to the RDA" x2 speech from Jake in a second). they also didn't really accept his culture. with their resentment towards the Na'vi brewing, Spider most definitely faced some heat for being more of the forest than of humans, in terms of culture.
3 times over, Spider came first and was put last. put last by parents who know damn well how much love, time, care, and attention a child needs. who should be able to see when a kid is being neglected. who dialed to advocate and protect him from neglect (instead of calling him a stray).
he was a child and they were his advocates. all three parties failed in their duty as advocates, to protect Spider. to ensure he always had a loving home that made him their priority. that fulfilled all his needs, not just the physical ones. but all put their own families first, and abandoned Spider to the scraps of their love, time, and affection.
imagine being Spider, an orphan who can't even mention his birth parents and is always treated like he is the physical rebirth of his father's sins by half the people around him. every adult in your life has kids and seems like they're such a good parent. you watch their kids being loved and tended to and having a steady home. they receive love and affection constantly. but your fosters pay less and less attention to you as they have babies. and now your a stray to the man you look up to so much. and the man who probably taught you how to put an exopack on has less and less time for you. no one has time for you. you're no one's child. no one's priority. just a stray. a nuisance. and you don't truly belong anywhere.
no one was putting him first. children need to be someone's priority. psychology. they need it.
and then the RDA returns. the McCoskers leave, Spider is expected to leave everything he has ever known, to join the very people he hates and has been trying so hard since he could understand what it meant, to prove that he wasn't like them. Jake, the man he once looked up to, was telling him to leave. sending him away. stripping him of the little amount of family he could somewhatly claim, that being his siblings.
once again, Jake is his chief, should be looking out for him. not even as a father, per say, but as his duty to Spider as his chief. a chief should never be sending away his most vulnerable ward, a child he should consider his own (as all of his clans children should be one with his own children), to the opposing enemy force.
this happens again when they're running away, Jake tells him ever more directly to hide in the forest alone until the RDA stops shooting at everything that moves and then turn himself in so he can his own children could run. once again, putting him last, instead of protecting all of them.
then for a year, Spider has no family. no one. the McCoskers are gone and no one has stepped up to bat for him. he's 15/16 and alone. his the big sibling to the Sully's. those kids are all he has, but they aren't really looking out for him. he's looking out for them. cause he's the oldest. that's just how it is. he is one with the clan. lives with them. does chores. watches out for his siblings, the whole nine. but Jake isn't doing his duty of watching out for his ward. he is once again giving and giving and giving, and not receiving.
and then he is taken, he is taken, and while Jake may not have had the means to go back for Spider, or been able to take the risk of going back for him, he abandons him without a thought for his safety, and puts his children first. it's the language and attitude be poses towards the situation that is wild to me. he has every right to be worried about his children, but he could not spare Spider an ounce of concern, even knowing the danger he was in, and is more concerned about him spilling details then anything else. Spider is, once again, not his first, second, or even third priority. he is a means to an end. a necessary loss.
people only care about Spider when there's nothing else they can put before him.
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bibuckleykinard · 5 months ago
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how many times do we need to learn as people that irony and hyperbole can be harmful because 'jokes' aren't easily distinguished from genuine thoughts and feelings until we stop rewarding people for speaking or posting about violence
like even if you're joking/don't actually believe that/think whoever you are insulting is bad/immoral/fictional therefore deserves it - ad hominem attacks always do more harm to the people who share those characteristic then the individual you intend to cause harm to or discredit
#discourse#long post#its genuinely erased so much of my enjoyment of 911blr knowing i have to check accounts or risk seeing bullying/hate#l like its an odd feeling to know that so many people in the same fandom as you actively hold hate or find hate funny against your communit#like tired of people saying others are too sensitive because we dont want to hear or see a person say they want to hurt themself or others#like sorry i put in the work everyday to not let my mental health backslide and to enjoying being alive and accept my queerness#while others seemingly have not#and i know the content i post/share is not all in the same circles as that certain blog and i hate that it still grinds my gears but#its so frustrating to see the cruel glee people have#saying things they would never say to anyone's face irl and only to other blindly devoted/similar bullies#like do these people realise that they are on a razor's edge between 'ironic jokes' and just outright bigotry and threats - like do they#literally the only thing seperating That and conservative bigots is that the bigots are honest about their hatred towards minorities#like a lot of people in the fandom seemingly still need to deal with a lot of intenalised homophobia/racism and just outright hate-#especially regarding queer men and men of colour#because i can not be emphasise enough#It is NOT GOOD OR HEALTHY to be a fully grown adult that actively derives joy from the idea of enacting hate crimes#like you can hate tommy you can want him off the show even want him to die like weird but go off#but its such a next step to unprompted talk about [a character i dislike/hate/dont ship/disrupts my fanon endgame] in derogatory ways -#with rhetoric that straight up is out of terf/rel. right/homophobic/racists bigots and evokes violent hate-crimes......#well i feel sorry for those people cause what a miserable life to spend so much of it unable to enjoy your own life that you target others#anyways I know this is too long but I'm just a very tired man who has studied history and education and working with kids i have seen it -#too many times- harmful words coming from harmful environments or creating harmful actions and thereby perpetuating the cycle of violence#also not super relavent but as Latino Australian i am genuinely appauled at how many people have in their bio they are also Australian-#while actively liking/reblogging and engaging with post that find homophobic violence a funny haha joke - as if activist in our country -#aren't actively trying to dismantle homophobic and transphobic laws regarding issues like conversion therapy#like I know professors that actively got fired for being gay while teaching in religious education context - and its still happening!#so for people to forget so quickly what progress has been made and how much it took and how easy it is to loose - disappointing#(and its the same people who wanna pretend mardi gras is nothing but a party as if 78rs didn't risk their jobs/safety/lives)
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gibbearish · 1 year ago
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btw its interesting the way james tries to imply that like. well the videos that have plagiarism are the ones our dumb stupid annoying patrons requested about bad topics that didnt deserve to have the effort put in to covering them well so basically its fine. like obv thats interesting on its own but moreso the fact that he doesnt actually /say/ it, or like. give a list of the videos hes referring to, just says "those videos are very clear on which ones they were" i think as a nod meaning like "yknow the ones everyones talking about". unless what hes meaning is that like they put a note in certain videos saying "this video was requested by a patron, we here at james somertom incorporated do not espouse these views" which seems unlikely to me. idk methinks maybe it's because there is indeed a lot more than people think and with all the buzz he's not sure which ones have been discovered yet or not, so putting down a solid list that missed some would look like he was still hiding things whereas putting down a fully sourced list would be admitting to wayyyy more than anyone's found yet
#which is ironic too bc if he genuinely did want to prove he understood what he did wrong and that hed changed thatd be the way to do it#yknow like a full list of every single source including ones no one has found on their own or /can/ find anymore would a) be taking full#responsibility and b) make people less likely to always be like 'youre still hiding something'#which in turn makes me super think hes still hiding a lot of somethings#also cant go without stating that the 'request a video topic' thing was only for $100/month patrons after 3 months on that tier#like fucker these people gave you THREE HUNDRED DOLLARS AT LEAST and youre trying to blame it on them??????#no one forced you to make 'let patrons pick video topics' a reward dude like. hello????????#shit dude even hbombs highest tier ($10 for anyone wondering bc he doesnt see his audience as a money machine lmao)#just says you can vote in polls about future topics#like that makes complete sense to me as a version of this‚ the most dedicated audience members get a say in the future of the#channel while the creator still gets overall control of the direction#also 'patrons who gave me fuckloads of money asked me to make videos on topics i didnt like so i plagiarized those' is i think uhhh#worse than just 'i plagiarize everything without remorse' frankly?#like at least with the second youre just a general shitbag but the first where youre a shitbag specifically to the people#majorly financially supporting you rather than just like. be an adult and say 'hm i dont feel like that topic really works for the channel‚#do you have any other ideas?'#or dare i say even perhaps yknow. doing what other youtubers do in similar situations and find ways to tie that subject#to what they usually talk about is just. wild#course that last one would take actual creativity and aint that just the crux of the issue#james somerton#or i say cannot go without stating i should say cannot go without restating kwnrkabdkwbrn
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shadyhouse · 5 days ago
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#i need a good reason to not kill myself because the world feels so fucking hostile right now and theres nowhere i can go to safety#my bank account is Seven Hundred And Thirty Dollars in the negatives. i have bills coming up this week. i have no hours at my job#i went to a job interview yesterday for fucking taco bell THATS how desperate i am. and im not even 100% sure if im gonna get it or not#and if i do get it my life will be miserable and i wont have time for anything else in my life im like actually terrified#i have so much Trauma from shitty unstable jobs for my whole adult life that it just feels painful to think about#i cant afford to live i cant afford to be homeless either#i should just die like genuinely im at the end of my rope i dont know how much longer i can keep doing this#im so stressed im so overwhelmed its so difficult to work on art because of this#my life is actively crumbing away beneath my feet the last thing i want to do is draw pictures#but i have to. i have no other choice i Have to#the world is better off without me in it OBVIOUSLY. like all i hear about constantly is how much trans people dont deserve to live#i shouldve considered this before i decided to be born the way i am#i never asked to be born into this. i wish i never was. i wish i wasnt alive right now#i dont want to live i dont want a life i dont want to keep on going if its just going to be like this all the time#i hate feeling this way because of MONEY. I HATE MONEY. MONEY ISNT REAL UNTIL IT IS REAL AND THEN ITS EXTREMELY REAL.#money is only real for poor people and thats what ive learned in my time on this earth#btw im not okay and nothing anyone can say to me will make me feel better because theres no fucking point in anything#i got denied for food stamps and welfare also btw lol like im doing everything i can to improve my life but everything sucks and is hard#and i dont have a safety net and im falling and falling and falling and im about to splat hard on the concrete#i have to do laundry and clean my room and make breakfast and work on art and all of that while knowing i cant pay my bills#i dont know why suddenly it feels impossible to do fucking anything. like theres no other choice but to suffer#it feels like the world is ending and Yes im having a catastrophic breakdown right now and i just need to shout into the void#i'll feel better after i eat but i need to get dressed first and i have no clean clothes so i have to do laundry#but i have to collect my clothes off of the floor and i have 0 energy bc i havent eaten and im stressed and fucked up#UUUUUGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH DIES#things could absolutely be worse right now but this is about as bad as they can be before that happens. lol
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skitskatdacat63 · 7 days ago
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Why does every aspect of my life keep combining today!? I decided to rewatch Hunchback of Notre Dame(1. The opening and Hellfire constantly haunt me, 2. HOW THE FUCK DID THEY GET AWAY WITH THIS FILM) I digress. I also watched Amadeus today so I'm like, HUH WAIT WDYM TOM HULCE IS IN THIS TOO!? And I don't know how to feel about the fact that I recognize Paris/Notre Dame so well purely bcs I've been playing ac unity every day 😭😭😭
#aghhhhhhhhh im so rambly today ignore me i just wanna talk abt everything and anything#the ac thing is so bad tho i dont know how to feel 😭😭#this movie obv takes place all around notre dame and i keep feeling like. deja vu#hey wait ive climbed up this tower before....ive been in this church before...#but only in my silly video game djjfkfkf#omg they namedropped some location in paris too and im like. i literally could point this out on a map 😭😭#OKAY BUT SERIOUSLY ASIDE FROM THAT I DONT GET HOW THEY GOT AWAY WITH THIS FILM#frollo is so...bro how is he a disney villain 😭😭 how is this a children's movie#its funny my moms like ah i hate that film. but i was playing some clips for her again and shes like fine. its not bad.#but her reasoning was bcs she thought: this isnt for children#but when i watched it as a kid i didnt think that at all. but watching it now im like HOW?!!?!?!?!!.#but that aside i kinda hate the way children's stuff today is soooooo bland and unchallenging#bcs this movie confronts such ADULT ideas but i was literally none the wiser. thus can enjoy it both as a kid and adult#man....frollo is so fascinating. i dont wanna say cool cause hes genuinely sooooooo fucked up#but his design and how he is as a villain is just so cool and im just so shocked they got away w this#i wish kids movies could be this fucked up again LOL#the frollo parts make you forget its even a kids movie 😭#his design tho is it too cliche of me to say he reminds me of a specific habsburg emperor-#also the tom hulce thing i was like YOURE KIDDING what a strange coincidence#catie.rambling.txt
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swagging-back-to · 6 months ago
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not sorry. i extend very little sympathy and patience towards tras who are underage, and the only ones who do get said sympathy are TIFs. but again. it's MICROSCOPIC levels of sympathy.
#i was also a tra as a minor (~10yo to 14yo)#and yet i never said even half the shit a lot of these kids are spewing with their whole chests.#i never hated on terfs; made rape jokes; made death threats.#I barely ever even argued with terfs bc i AGREED WITH THEM even as a tra. the only thing i disagreed on was how they went about it#(i felt like they were 'too mean'. now that i am a radfem i see we arent mean enough.)#i never in my life shared countless anti terf memes. never had a DNI.#never spammed terf tags and spaces.#never sent hate anons.#so yeah#i do genuinely judge kids who do this because i WAS ALSO A CHILD and i NEVER did this shit even at the height of the trans ideology#worming its way into the government and law.#people need to understand that children can and SHOULD have morals. just like adults.#you shouldnt need to be told 'hey this is bad' to know thats bad. if you have morals then you simply just know.#i tried to go vegan my entire life. would refuse to eat animals even when i was 4 years old. went officially vegan at 11 when i realized i#wouldnt die without animal protein (and even if i did i was sick of funding animal murder)#no one NEEDED to tell me to do that.#my morals simply did not agree with killing and eating other living beings.#so kids who are willing to do all this shit? yeah. thats ust a reflection of their innate morals. not even joking here either.#i work with kids.#i know how downright cruel they can be and not just in a 'im socially inept and have no filter yet'#but intentionally cruel.#intentionally heinous. and tiktok exposure only makes it so much worse.#so yeah if you are a minor and i go on your account and i see dozens of terf-hate posts?#i AM judging you and i feel zero sympathy for anything coming your way#and i do genuinely hope they wither away in shame and regret when they get older#I didnt even do any of this shit and yet i still feel ashamed and remorseful for the stupid tra shit i spewed (mostly about how#sex and gender arent the same. that was the HEIGHT of my trans rights activism. that's barely 1% of what these kids are saying.)#like i understand where theyre coming from and i get why theyd buy into the trans cult; but that does NOT excuse their behavior.#rudefem
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silencingspellsongs · 1 year ago
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begging people to adopt the idgaf mindset i think if we all just developed a lil idgaf energy it would lead us to nirvana
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Do you ever read a post where someone is explaining a pokitical thing and from the way they're saying you know with absolute certainty 1) they got their info from a tumblr post and have never actually followed up on how feasible that information actually is to act upon (they may not even have checked if it was CORRECT, but when they do they have clearly not looked into how easy or hard it may be to follow those instructions with a positive outcome), and 2) you know WHICH tumblr post they're quoting because it is basically a copy/paste of it, and 3) it was YOUR goddamn post and the thing they are saying is entirely counter to the point you were making when you said it to the point that you genuinely wonder if they just like. Memory-holed the entire context once they saw that one itty bitty point.
It's like the motherfuckiny dating apps all over again. I do not want people to love my words if they are not actually willing to do the work of understanding them! Didn't your kindergarten ever make you play Telephone to teach you how heresay falls out????
#sometimes i feel like a prized 12 point buck and everyone is desperate to give chase so they can skin me and wear my pelt in memorium#the luxury of being seen is rarely extended to those we perceive as confident/constant in their sense of self#the path of being a child who was constantly told i was making people uncomfortable and alienating my peers#only to immediately become an adult who everyone perceives as so together that they are just Like That With Everyonr#brennan said something like this in the disection of a recent misfits and magic episode about sam (character)#and how he (as evan) realized that the charm and specialness she gifts to everyone around her means that no one ever really gifts it back#and how that fundamentally felt transcendent and revelatory for evan as a turning point idea#he'd spent so long never trusting others feelings of care for him that he couldn't see how he was bulldozing right into and over sam's own#insecurities about whether or not she is worth loving or is special in the same way#and then they had some back and forth about like#sometimes when you develop the skill of relateability and pacification#you disappear so deeply into it that no one notices you're gone - even you yourself - until it's too late#it put to words a lot of the like#gap. that i've always felt between me and others. this insistance on elevating or pathologizing me depending on where they feel the need#to be in relation to me#while having absolutely zero awareness of my actual positioning in relation to them#i have found that they way i interact with others seems to give the impression that because i am being 'genuine' and 'open' about myself#that ALSO means that I am sharing the whole of me.#and when i talk about destigmatization and shame and people work really hard to be like. aware of the edges of me to carch me embarrassed#like if they can prove that i don't 'admit' something it's because i'm ashamed as opposed to considering that maybe they don't have the kind#of relationship with me that would warrant the sharing of it#because i'm willing to talk i am no longer allowed privacy or it's treated as incongruous#but like. i am different people for different people and they are all authentically me but they are also about faciliting the version#of the other person that matters to me to be able to spend time with. i'm not going to bring the parts of me that put you in a bad mood#or aren't comfortable/safe for you. also probably not going to put those things out into the open world as a mixed company conversation#i don't know where I'm going or where I came from here but i think the point is just that I think there's melancholy in seeing when#you also don't know a reliable way to be seen in turn
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flippedorbit · 3 months ago
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i’m gonna be so for real, if things don’t start changing for me in good ways i will be disappearing off the face of the earth
#Rasp Rambles#vent#my mental health is already in a shitty state and i am already considering multiple different ways to end my own fucking life#suicide mention#like i’m genuinely hanging on by the thinnest fucking thread only because i have friends that care about me. i don’t want any of them to be#sad about me dying. i’d say the same for my family but i don’t they ever have really given a shit about me so what does it matter.#i’ve been forced to be the perfect; quite child my entire fucking life and that was never good enough. i had to be kind and respectful#even though none of the adults in my family ever really were that to me. and the ones who were didn’t stay that way for long. it truly#sucks so fucking badly that i can’t get away from any of them. i don’t have a job because mental health issues; some physical health issues#and my lack of drivers license and car. i can’t financially support myself. i never get to fucking leave the house and go anywhere but the#store or my grandparent’s house with my mom and sister. i have ONE irl friend who i’m not even sure considers me a friend because#we haven’t gotten to hang out much since i graduated in 2023. i have practically no fucking support system in the physical world.#i don’t get to do fun things i enjoy that aren’t internet related besides drawing. but artblock and general depression are doing their#damn best to prevent me from even enjoying the creative process at all. one may think its difficult to feel lonely when you’re living in a#house with at least one other person but its fully fucking possible apparently. for me at least. i really wish my mom would actually get me#a therapist or psychiatrist i can see in person but we all know that’ll never fucking happen because again; she doesn’t fucking care enough#to make any actually helpful attempts to get me medicated for whatever the fucks going on in this stupid head of mine.#sorry for being incredibly fucking depressed and mad at 3am. it will happen again unfortunately for all of us.
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