#gender discourse //

[craftherpes]

Congrats on having the courage to come out to them, and the wisdom to realize their opinion doesn't have to matter to you. I hope you find better people to love.

Mentioned I was non binary during a conversation earlier this week. Someone I've loved my whole life, who claims to love me, looked me in the eye, face screwed up with disgust, and said, 'You have mental problems - you know that, right?'

You can only see how little their love is worth when you refuse to be what they want you to be.

I will not be bullied into silence. I will not conform.

Why should I be uncomfortable for the sake of their comfort, when they feel free to insult and invalidate me openly, even smugly?

No. No. No. I won't.

To every single person who thinks they get to decide who the fuck I am - or who anyone else is, for that matter - Go. Fuck. Yourselves.

And to anyone else who's facing this kind of bullshit - Don't let them tell you you're the problem. You aren't. They are.

[audhdnight]

⚠️PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT⚠️

The Queer Liberation Library is, as the name suggests, a digital library centered around queer literature. They offer library cards to anyone in any place, all you need in order to sign up is an email address. Then you can access their catalog online or through apps like Libby.

When I signed up I received an email that said there’s sometimes a waitlist, but I should have my card within a week or else someone would get back to me within that timeframe to explain if I had to wait longer. I ended up getting my card after only a couple of days.

Their website is very accessible and easy to use. My favorite features are the button at the bottom of the screen which lets you switch between light and dark mode, and the Quick Exit banner along the top of the page that doesn’t go away regardless of where you navigate on the site.

This is such an incredible resource and I can’t believe I didn’t know about it until very recently. I want every queer person to know about it! They have accounts on most of the major social media sites (such as tiktok, Instagram, even here on tumblr at @queerliblib). There’s also a place on their website where you can suggest books they should add to their catalog.

After you get your card, I’d suggest the first book you read to be Beyond the Gender Binary by Alok Vaid-Menon. It is a short but powerful little book that I think is an incredibly concise analysis of societal gender-based discrimination, and a great place to start a lot of really important discussions. I listened to the audiobook this morning (it was only an hour long, which is a win for my trash attention span) and I couldn’t believe how good it was for so little page time.

I will absolutely be reading the rest of the Pocket Change Collective (the series which Beyond the Gender Binary is part of) and I can’t wait to see what I’ll learn from them.

[invertedfate]

Wait a minute. Toby Fox said Frisk and Chara’s gender is up to interpretation meaning their gender is canonically (error_error)*

Toby has never made any statements regarding their gender, whether it's up for interpretation or not. The game uses they/them and he did correct his fangamer pals on a livestream regarding Kris' gender. I'm not really interested in debating this, though.

[disappointmentthemusical]

"Mainstream gender" as a system of oppression.

Imagine mainstream gender as a line. On one end of the line is "man," and on the other end is "woman" – this is the gender binary. The connecting line itself is representative, loosely, of "non-binary" gender. (I think this image is suitable, and if others disagree, I think that's more representative of how arbitrarily the binary is defined, rather than this image of it.)

This gender spectrum, dubbed "mainstream gender" because it's what the institutions of society use, only applies to certain groups – the group that controls it, really. White people.

Black people cannot access mainstream gender because they are barred from it via hyper-masculinization that borders on animalization. Black men are viewed as hyper-aggressive and predatory. To the white masses, the concept of "soft" Black masculinity is as real as the transatlantic slave trade (i.e., vague notions of it existing, but no personal experience with the implications, so it floats in the periphery until it's brought up again by a Black person). Black women, regardless of how much they lean into "traditional" femininity, will never be viewed as feminine. Black women will always be viewed as loud, aggressive and "man-ish," the latter contributing to transphobia that impacts both black trans women and black cis women.

By contrast, East Asians are hyper-feminized. East Asian men are stereotyped as soft and small and are portrayed as having little sexual appeal (and those who are viewed as sexually desirable are seen as exceptions to the mainstream; sexy despite their femininity). East Asian women are equally unable to escape femininity and are hyper-feminized to the point of infantilisation, both of which contribute to hyper-sexualization and fetishization. The hyper-femininization of East Asian people also lends itself to transphobia targeted at East Asian trans men (recall: the 2016/17 obsession with smol bois).

But not only is mainstream gender a tool of white supremacy, it also (obviously) is inherent to patriarchy (or, patriarchy is inherent to mainstream gender).

The binary is defined and propagated by men. So while all gender rules are arbitrary and constantly changing, "man" is always strictly defined, and the relief of "man" becomes "woman." This is evident both in masculinity being viewed as "gender neutral," as well as the sense of authority men feel over women's gender, commenting on makeup, how women dress, etc. As a result, the gender "woman" is inherently centered around "man."

In de-centering men, lesbians lack the rules to adhere to mainstream gender. That is why lesbianism is often described as a gender experience because lesbians operate on a new gender spectrum, specific to lesbians.

However, different from race, sexuality is not a visible barrier, and it can take work to exit from mainstream gender. Terf "lesbians" are not lesbians because they cling to the relief of "man" to define their gender; they're gay women. Similarly, white lesbians who prioritize their whiteness will continue to exist within mainstream gender. This also explains why white non-binary people are "like that." While they do not adhere to the binary of "man" and "woman," in participating in the system of whiteness, they remain within the confines of mainstream gender.

[tinkerbitch69]

I’m sure this one will attract the terfs like flies but I’m gonna say it anyway cuz I haven’t heard anyone express or discuss this exact take but here goes:

‘biological sex’ categories are just modern day phrenology

Like first off it’s based around the idea that someone’s ’biological sex’ is dependent on the convergence of multiple factors I.e chromosomes, hormone levels, genitalia, etc. But the idea that any of these indicators are inherent to the ‘biological sex’ they are attributed to is disproven by both intersex people and trans people. I.e Many cisgender women are born with a Y chromosome. Trans women with so called ‘male’ physiology can develop breast tissue and estrogen levels on par with someone with ‘female’ physiology.

Now the existence of these traits and the effects on the body is verifiable if disputable, but the modern idea of sex involves the assumption that these physical traits are indicative of someone’s character or capabilities. (i.e high testosterone means someone is more aggressive, high estrogen prevents high levels of physical achievement etc.)

How is this any different from assuming someone’s skull shape says anything about their intelligence?

And the fact that the modern ideas of what it means to be ‘biologically male’ or ‘biologically female’ were formed through deeply racist and violent phrenological research kind of supports this fact. So why do we assume these value assertions about individuals because of their physical traits are in fact true when the others are clearly false (obvs not everyone does think that sadly but generally speaking phrenology is scientifically discredited)

So when people claim we need to acknowledge the ‘biological reality’ of sex, both disingenuously and sincere,

do we though???

Yes we need to acknowledge the fact of generalised physical differences between people but I think we should question the idea that these physical differences indicate anything about a person’s personality, behaviour or capabilities and the validity of ‘sexual categories’ especially.

Side note: if this is like the stalest possible take in intersex discourse I apologise, I am merely a humble perisex trans woman who has engaged in way too many arguments with my increasingly right wing mother about imane khelif over the past few days and thought I should share my thoughts. Y’all are awesome and people should listen to your takes on sex and gender more often 🫶

[bullshit-tqia]

A list of side effects and risks for mtf estrogen:

This is thanks to a friend, she gets full credit for this post.

"Some takeaways: almost none of the studies report that estrogen does anything positive to male bodies, except lowering blood pressure in young people and stopping balding

Essentially most of the articles were freaking out about how we need more high quality data to determine if estrogen is safe or not, but of the studies I went through:"

Risks associated with estrogen use by men found:

Heart Risks: Venous Thromboembolism (VTE): 9 articles

Myocardial Infarction (MI): 5 articles

Ischemic Stroke: 5 articles

Other Cardiovascular Events: 6 articles

Fertility Risks: 6 articles

Cancer Risks: 8 articles

Key Dangers that evidence found in MTF people:

Dangers to the Heart:

Venous Thromboembolism (VTE): Increased risk reported across multiple studies.

Myocardial Infarction (MI): Elevated risk associated with estrogen therapy.

Ischemic Stroke: Increased incidence observed in studies.

Other Cardiovascular Events: General cardiovascular disease risks

Dangers to Fertility: Impacts on spermatogenesis and testicular health, with some studies noting fertility preservation in a portion of trans women.

Dangers to Cancer Risk: Potential increased risk for breast cancer and other hormone-sensitive malignancies. Dangers that are suspected based on know qualities of estrogen:

Cancer Risks: Potential increased risk for specific cancers beyond breast cancer, such as papillary thyroid cancer and other hormone-sensitive malignancies.

Liver Toxicity: Concerns regarding hepatotoxic effects and liver integrity due to long-term estrogen use.

Cardiac Arrhythmias: Suggested increase in the rates of cardiac arrhythmias in some studies, although direct causation remains unclear.

Gallbladder Issues: Potential association with gallstones and pancreatitis, but more research is needed for conclusive evidence.

Long-term Bone Health: Uncertainty about how long-term estrogen use affects bone density and overall bone health.

Psychiatric Effects: Speculation about possible mood changes or psychiatric effects, though this is often individualized and not well documented.

Metabolic Changes: Concerns about changes in metabolism and body composition, including the risk of obesity, but conclusive links remain to be established.

On regaining fertility after estrogen:

After an average of three years on estrogen, ony 40% of trans women will still be fertile. After discontinuation of hormones, 66% will get their fertility back (with the span of the study), and most of the people observed had impaired semen quality after stopping. The contributing factor may be the age when hormones were started, with older people being more protected.

But hey, I'm just an alarmist.

Sources:

https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0090429519306302 https://www.cell.com/cell-medicine/fulltext/S2666-3791(22)00422-0 [1:12 PM] Bock, M. E., et al. "Incidence of Venous Thromboembolism in Transgender Women Prescribed Estrogen." Clinical Chemistry, vol. 65, no. 1, 2019, pp. 57-66. https://academic.oup.com/clinchem/article/65/1/57/5607952.

Keshavarz, M., et al. "Spermatogenesis in Transgender Women." Journal of Clinical Endocrinology & Metabolism, 2020. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0090429519306302.

Bhasin, S., et al. "Estrogens and Tumorigenesis." Prostate, vol. 79, no. 9, 2019, pp. 1027-1033. https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1002/pros.23322.

Kearney, T., et al. "Prostate Cancer in Transgender Women." JAMA Network Open, vol. 2, no. 7, 2019. https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jama/article-abstract/2820386.

Kley, M. A., et al. "Estrogen and Testicular Health." BMC Urology, vol. 18, 2018, p. 68. https://link.springer.com/article/10.1186/s13256-018-1894-6.

Chen, C. L., et al. "Cardiovascular Risks in Transgender Patients." American Journal of Physiology-Heart and Circulatory Physiology, vol. 324, no. 4, 2023, pp. H674-H688. https://journals.physiology.org/doi/full/10.1152/ajpheart.00299.2022.

Lee, D. L., et al. "Hematologic Complications of Estrogen Therapy." Annals of Internal Medicine, vol. 167, no. 1, 2017, pp. 46-55. https://www.acpjournals.org/doi/full/10.7326/M17-2785.

Van Kesteren, P. J., et al. "Long-term Cardiovascular Risks of Hormone Therapy." Circulation Reports, vol. 5, no. 4, 2023. https://www.jstage.jst.go.jp/article/circrep/5/4/5_CR-23-0021/_article/-char/ja/.

Naderi, H., et al. "Risks of Cardiovascular Disease in Transgender Women." The Journal of Clinical Endocrinology & Metabolism, vol. 104, no. 8, 2019, pp. 3505-3514. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0890623820301295.

Mehta, A., et al. "Estrogen and the Liver." American Journal of Gastroenterology, vol. 115, no. 1, 2020, pp. 15-23. https://journals.lww.com/ajg/fulltext/2020/10001/S2417_The_Skinny_on_Estrogen_and_Liver_Fat.2417.aspx.

Miller, L. J., et al. "Venous Thromboembolism in Transgender Women." American Journal of Health Promotion, vol. 78, no. 18, 2022, pp. 1674-1680. https://academic.oup.com/ajhp/article-abstract/78/18/1674/6264946. Smith, C. R., et al. "Bone Density in Transgender Patients." Journal of Bone and Mineral Research, vol. 37, no. 4, 2022, pp. 643-650. https://academic.oup.com/jbmr/article/37/4/643/7516770.

Tam, D. Y., et al. "Implications of Estrogen on Cancer Risk." Frontiers in Endocrinology, vol. 12, 2021. https://www.frontiersin.org/journals/endocrinology/articles/10.3389/fendo.2021.718200/full.

Gupta, A., et al. "Estrogen Therapy and Pancreatitis." The American Journal of Cardiology, vol. 125, no. 12, 2020, pp. 1836-1842. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0890623820301295.

Johnson, J. E., et al. "Long-term Effects of Estrogen on Metabolism." Cell Medicine, vol. 9, no. 4, 2022. https://www.cell.com/cell-medicine/fulltext/S2666-3791(22)00422-0.

[willowbilly]

There's that interpretation of transfemininity's very existence being an implicit repudiation of patriarchy because to transition from the male gender is supposedly itself an inherently feminist act that socially, physically “detracts” from maleness and therefore subverts the rule of male supremacy. The corollary to this belief in personal relinquishment of the masculine as moral activism is that of transmasculinity supposedly reinforcing patriarchy, because for one to transition toward the male gender is to commit an inherently anti-feminist act, “detracting from” or “repudiating” femaleness. By the same logic, one might say that to transition outside the gender binary is an act that personally opposes it and thus patriarchy at an even more radical level than does transitioning exclusively to the binary female gender. 

Hopefully one can see that this is all just politicization of identity. It is not the actual truth. These meanings are constructed and applied. All transgender people transgress assigned gender and so may be said to subvert cissexist patriarchy. One may make the choice to politicize one's own identity, but the gender identities of others should not automatically be construed as political statements in and of themselves. Personally existing need not be activism. One is not more or less feminist purely on the basis of one's gender identity/modality/presentation. 

Gender transition is morally neutral.

[butch-reidentified]

maybe if you stop harrassing transpeople maybe people won't hate you as much! :)

ironic to send this on anon like a coward and thus contribute to the nonstop harassment radfems get just for being feminists, while in fact I've never harassed a trans person - or any person - in my entire life (I've never even sent an ask on anon before!), only been harassed while minding my own business. yall NEVER stop harassing feminists even when we aren't even talking about you. funny how i got this at the same time as this other anon. this you harassing me or just a fascinating coincidence?

my feminism isn't even focused on the gender identity ideology (GII) discourse, my primary focuses are helping women escape abusive relationships and heal from them, fighting for women preyed on by the sex industry (including intervening in situations of attempted trafficking), forging feminist networks to get access to abortion to every single woman/girl possible no matter which state they live in (hopefully internationally someday too), lesbian liberation, un-erasing women's history as much as possible, consciousness raising & building female class solidarity, female separatism & making more women aware that it's a thing & doesnt just mean moving to women's land, and much more. the fight of feminism vs GII is soooo far down my list of priorities, and has never once led me to harass any human.

in fact, I've ALSO done way more irl direct action for trans people than any of yall who harass me on here - probably more than all of you combined. check the link in my pinned post for more on this actually here you go, I'll make it easy for you. I have done and still do a LOT for trans people in need. I am more beneficial to trans wellbeing than you internet slacktivists who harass me and call me a transphobic bigot. get off your ass and try doing even a tiny fraction of the work I've done for trans people, you pathetic, cowardly hypocrite. lmfao

[lord-of-the-margins]

Recent thoughts on Transgenderism

Tumblr, I think it’s time we approach the gender talk.

I’ve been very angry at liberals since about 2022. Before that (2019-2021) I was terrified of them. I grew up as a liberal in a very liberal area. I knew one moderate conservative. All I’ve known is liberal perspectives and ideologies for most of my life. I went to Evergreen State college for years (super senior). I lived in the epicenter of woke.

I’m not going to be a liberal ever again. Being around a lot of liberals, like in a city, makes me nervous. That’s how bad things have been in my little world. All the bridges have been burnt and every knife has somehow found its way into my back. I’ve since taken them out and re-calibrated my expectations.

Still, I have gender issues. They’ve gotten a lot better. And gender shit is still consuming society for no real reason other than to spread misery it seems.

Because of how horrifically poorly liberal society handles the issue of transsexualism and transgenderism, I’m scared to share the new insights I’ve made regarding gender dysphoria. The way the left fetishizes and commodifies mental illness is truly disturbing. The teenage impulse to commandeer and mimic mental illness for attention is never discouraged at any point. Not even in fully grown adults.

If I tell you what I’ve discovered, I’m afraid you will destroy yet another portion of the DSM in a misguided attempt to validate me. It is not validating. You are harming people. I needed the DSM to figure out what was happening. I needed psychologists to push back on my impulses. I’m glad they did. They can no longer do so without fear of being slandered as transphobic.

I look at the work you’ve done on behalf of the trans community and it reads as a collection of demons trying their best to fix society.

So yeah.

I like Tumblr for reasons other than politics. I don’t really want to talk about politics on here all that much. But this national gender dysphoria the younger generations all seem to have is hard to ignore. It can also be offensive. I’ve felt as offended by Zoomers and Alphas trying to be inclusive as I did from Gen X trying to hurt my feelings. So that’s been a fun little discovery I’ve made about myself and the world. Maybe you just can’t escape it. It’s part of life either way. And if you’re fucking around with gender, it’s inevitable. Maybe constant offense needs to happen just to make this demented form of self-expression that less attractive. Because a trans identity is not an attractive endeavor. It doesn’t make for attractive men and women. If you must do it, you need a thick skin just to look at yourself in the mirror let alone to hear what anyone else has to say about it. It’s signing up for a lifetime of disappointment and can only be explained through mental illness.

To conclude, what I found behind the mental illness was even more mental illness. Given liberals’ inclination to celebrate, imitate, and capitalize on mental illness, I don’t think it would be wise for me to tell you about what I did to make the pain of gender dysphoria go away.

What I will tell you is that I had to recognize that I suffered incredible abuse growing up. Truly exceptional abuse. I’ve been studying books on the matter on and off for about four years now. I had to learn a lot of new things and it was very overwhelming at first. It changed how I saw myself and even how I view reality. It’s been quite a journey.

None of the resources I used were made by anyone in the trans community. None whatsoever. All the people who helped me wrote their books in saner times. Your big gay trans social justice movement didn’t help me one bit. Just like feminism has never really helped me personally. Because exceptional people don’t need a parade to get their foot in the door.

Whenever I get close to woke people, I get nervous. I’ve gotten better at sensing that malevolent energy. Since I grew up with it, it took some time to suss it out. It took a massive fuck up, followed up with sticking to my convictions, to feel about fifty knives in my back before it finally sank in.

A lot of damage has been done and yet there are people under the left’s banner I could still care for. People who make uplifting art that has truly helped me. If I hadn’t found them, I wouldn’t have bothered writing this. So I guess this is for the innocent, the clueless, the kind.

I would only consider seriously talking about gender dysphoria with the public if and only if the DSM once again recognizes transsexualism and transgenderism as mental illnesses and the American Psychological Association allows its practitioners to discourage transitioning.

[neuropoppins]

I’m putting together questions for a new series of online Autistic Interviews and would love your help! The interviews will be based around Autism, Gender, Gender Critical, Gender Ideology etc

Let’s make this a collaborative effort and show the world what we really think! 

You don’t need to be autistic to help at this stage

The institutions, Gender Clinics and Autism Organisations are not asking enough questions and it’s leaving a gaping hole. Let’s do it ourselves! 

What would YOU like to see in the interviews?

What questions do you find yourself asking? 

What questions do you wish the institutions were asking? 

What questions do you think you can contribute answers to?

What are you concerned or confused about?

How have you have been affected by gender ideology? Have you been through gender distress and are now gender critical? How did you become GC? How have your beliefs changed? What have your experiences been regarding talking about autism and gender?

What experiences do you come up against and feel challenging to engage with due to lack of knowledge?

What are your personal insights/experiences with autism, gender, masking, social differences, identity, alexithymia, dysphoria, sensory, society, connection, autism spaces/community, bullying, relationships, support, comorbid conditions, mental health, OCD, trans/detrans…. Anything!

What topics are important to explore?

What current Q&As are out there that you think need challenging or reframing?

What do you think you can give to the conversation? 

Let’s put these questions into the interviews and then out into the public and see what comes back, since the organisations aren’t doing it. Gender Critical Autistic Voices are not being heard and I want to create a space where our voices can penetrate the conversations. Once I’ve put the interviews together autistic people will be able to attempt to answer these questions themselves, provide their unique insights and share their stories - we have a plethora of life experiences that should be added to the discourse. We will all have different ways of looking at it and by getting our voices out there we can create new paths for conversations 

I want these interviews to be a collaborative effort - let’s see what we can come up with! 

Feel free to put suggestions in the comments of this post

Or if you prefer, DM me or email me at neuro.poppins24@gmail.com

Share this post to reach more people

Follow for updates and notifications when the interviews begin

Have your say! 

[sophieinwonderland]

can you PLEASE stop tagging your dumb bullshit “syscourse” posts with lgbt tags. i’m begging you.

I mean... when you put it like that...

I think I'll do it more.

This was a post directly about how the "sysmed is transphobic" talking point harms transgender systems by branding transgender systems who have been harmed by sysmeds as transphobic.

This topic is every bit as much of an LGBT issue as it is a syscourse issue.

[audhdnight]

You need to come to terms with the fact that there is nothing that makes men and women inherently different. Nothing. There is not a single characteristic that you can point to and say “yes that is a man thing and no woman does it” because there will always be exceptions, and a lot more of them than you think. Any time you try to separate the two (say for example in a discussion about reproductive rights) you exclude cis women with physical differences, trans women, intersex women, and yes even men who belong in the discussion as well.

There are boys that “look like” girls, girls that “look like” boys, non-binary people that look like one or both, and people who do fit in the gender binary but look like neither. There are girls that are also sometimes boys and vice versa. There are people whose gender fluctuates a lot and yet never lands on “man” or “woman” at all.

There is no separation of gender beyond what you as your own person decide your own gender is (and if you don’t want to decide that’s perfectly fine too). The more you accept that, the less you’ll police others’ identities and expressions, the more accepting you will become, and the better for it.

[casperz-xs0ulz]

I fucking hate how us bigender people are always characterized as men who have a weird kink for being also women, its harmful to all of us, especially amab bigender folks. and it erases any other type of bigender person. it is not a fetish or us wanting a penis and a vagia. we are men, women, both or 2 other genders at the same time! we are not some gross perverted men.

[eternitylarva]

anyone who says shit like "only lesbians/wlw can understand wlw fully so its obvious when a man is writing it" is fucking insane btw. men writing women is a thing but there is no gender essentialism in genres or romance dynamics. you are lost in the sauce. my best friend is a man and we co-write the best yuri on this planet together.

[modgod200]

This might be a controversial post, but fuck it.

I think the only people who are qualified to talk about the other gender’s experience are trans people. Unless you have lived as that gender, your opinion of their experience is based solely on other people’s accounts and/or your own biased observations of what their experience must be like. I have never been a woman. I do not know what it is like to exist as a woman nor do I know what it is like to be treated as a woman, and if I tried to picture life as a women based on what I have seen or heard it is not going to be an accurate representation of being a woman. The same way that if you have lived your entire life as a woman you do not understand what it is truly like to live as a man. You look like a dumbass if you talk about how the other group will “ never understand what it’s like” to be your gender and then act like you have perfect encyclopedic knowledge on the other’s lived experiences.

Trans people are the only people who truly understand how the world treats both men and women, and I find their accounts and insights about their experiences to be absolutely fascinating. Hearing trans men’s accounts about being a man has opened my eyes to some of my own experiences that I have never really examined because I thought it was a universal fact of life instead of a gender-specific experience. And hearing trans women’s experiences on being a woman has helped me understand a little bit better how a woman’s experiences differ from my own because they actually have a man’s frame of reference that they can compare it to and explain it with.

[hyggehooligan]