#fuck 'supposed to'
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don't be afraid of buying things that make your life easier. don't talk yourself out of it, beat yourself up for being "lazy", or shame yourself for not being able to do things the "right" way so you don't deserve to try it a different way.
if there's a thing out there that can make something faster, more bearable, less painful, more tolerable, anything like that at all, and you can afford it? you have the right, you deserve it, and you should do it.
i've stuck for the last several years with exclusively those detachable sprayer showerheads, because i need to be able to sit down in the bath and it makes the entire operation easier, so i'm less likely to risk a concussion or pass out or wobble and slip.
for the last few years, i've been using one with a little powerwash spray setting and i use it before and after every shower and it keeps my tub and shower cleaner so much longer, which is great because i hate cleaning the bath and can put it off for months, and scrubbing kills my shoulders.
sometimes, whether it's the executive dysfunction, or the depression, or knowing that i become entirely detached from the concept of time when in the shower, if i can't bring myself to get in the damn thing and do a full-blown shower, and i know i'd just be uncomfortable and not clean and still keep putting it off (because i can easily lose well over an hour once in there), i will kneel on my (cushy, quick-dry, memory foam) bathroom mat beside the tub and lean over it to wash my hair and face and maybe soap up to my shoulders. then later when it feels like a way more manageable and shorter task i can do a quick scrub and rinse.
i've bought cbd for when my joint pain makes sleeping otherwise impossible (even though it's expensive) and a work desk that has expandable legs to be a bed desk if i ever need to work sick (i'm lucky to be remote since my job change).
i've bought the screw-top, 40oz, insulated mugs and extra long plastic straws (do not @ me) and the pop-bottom giant cube ice trays all because every one of those helps ensure i drink more water every day (and so does the faucet-mounted water filter).
i buy specific individual snacks that require little to no prep so even when the execution of making a sandwich is Too Damn Much, i can still make myself do some calorie intake.
i talked myself into a cushioned mattress topper to relieve my spine and because it's way cheaper than a new mattress. i bought blackout curtains for our old apartment because the outdoor lights were insanely bright at all hours and made sleep even more elusive.
i've purchased slip on-only shoes or no-tie laces because i hate tying shoelace knots, my hands are less dexterous than ever (and hurt), and because i struggle with time management and it's one small thing to shave off just a little more time so i'm a little less late.
i didn't buy all of these things all at once, definitely. i am, sadly, made of meat and not money.
but i started budgeting, slowly, more and more of whatever amount of disposable income i had after bills towards "thing to make life suck less and not be so hard" and i can't regret it in the least.
i deserve not only small comforts and joys, but also less pain and difficulty, and ways to make challenging parts of life a little more within my reach with not quite as much effort.
so do you.
#chronic illness#disability#but this is not just for disabled people#or those who are of a certain level of Suffering#so don't go telling yourself 'oh well this doesn't apply to me because i'm SUPPOSED to have no issue'#fuck 'supposed to'#reaching for the right tool for the job of living decently and in relative comfort and happiness is not failure it's good sense
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ENTRY LEVEL MEANS NO EXPERIENCE. IT MEANS NO PORTFOLIO OF RELEVANT SAMPLES. ENTRY LEVEL IS ENTRY LEVEL
#HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GAIN EXPERIENCE YOU STUPID FUCKS#I HATE THIS I HATE JOB HUNTING THIS SYSTEM IS ABSOLUTE DOG SHIT
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Annabeth: I, a child, had to earn Thalia’s love, that’s how the world works! I have to earn my moms love. Love is transactional, you gotta be worthy of it first silly :)
Percy, listening to this on the train
#STOP TRAUMATIZING THIS CHILD PLEASE#this is what it’s like when you were raised in a loving home and you find out your friend wasn’t#but they don’t know they weren’t#so you’re like um hey that’s fucked up and sometimes a crime?#you tell them parents are supposed to love you as is without earning it and they don’t believe you#you can hear the therapy bill racking up#annabeth chase#Percy jackson#percy jackson and the olympians#percy jackon and the olympians#pjo#pjo series#pjo tv show#mine#adding on to my tags because some people are debating if that’s how love works#love is meant to be a mutual exchange and something that grows over time between two people as their bond grows#whereas how Annabeth says it#in my opinion at least#she had to do XY and Z to be worthy of thalias love before receiving it#like with her mother#she has to be amazing before Athena is proud of her#vs Athena being proud of her just for being her daughter#that being said I’m not hating on a traumatized child having potentially negative and toxic patterns#more pointing out the comedy of the scene from Percy’s perspective who has a good grasp on healthy vs unhealthy relationships
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Physically? I am sitting in my bedroom. Mentally? Spiritually? I AM DEAD ON THE FLOOR!!!!! THESE TWO HAVE KILLED ME!!!!
(Another drawing! This was originally attempt #1 at drawing stan, and then fiddleford just showed up. Kinda feels like them five minutes after the above acting like nothing happened though, so it works sdjkgkjfshj)
#HEALED FIDDLEFORD HAS ME BOUNCING OFF THE FUCKING WALLS!!!!!!! GIVE THE MAN A BRIGHT HAPPY FUTURE!!! FUCK!!!!!#I don't know how i'm coming off right now#when i say that i've been super manic about them for the past week I really mean it#guys Idk but I think I might be fiddlestans number one fan#I liked this pairing before book of bill and after reading it it only solidified things#IT IS SO MUCH MORE THAN A CRACK SHIP TO ME!!!!!!!!#fiddlestan#gravity falls#anyway this is supposed to be them the next summer#stan is working the shack to tutor soos for tourist season#fiddleford has changed while the twins were on the stan o war#STAN DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO FEEL AT FIRST and they have a lot of shit to work through from their past before they can start making out dksjds#sketchbook#traditional art#pencil drawing#traditional drawing#stanley pines#fiddleford mcgucket#gravity falls fanart
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Tma + tmagp art masterpost
#I’m missing some sketches but there’s a fucking image post LIMIT#mostly posting this for myself so I don’t have to keep forgetting where I put my art. I lose it a lot.#tmagp#tma#the magnus protocol#the magnus archives#Jonathan sims#Martin Blackwood#lady mowbray#Michael Shelly#michael distortion#3rd drawing was supposed to just be a random eye inspired drawing but so many people tag it as Elias it’s just Elias now. sorry.#elias Bouchard#my art#mod post
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i would say that, mentally speaking, i'm in a good place right now! physically of course, the crows continue their chanting,
#'weaving spells with beaks and talons' whatever u wanna call it. sounds like chanting to me#anyway yes. that is a thing that is happening#yes i am aware of it. stop asking.#am i taking steps to stop this thing from happening? how. how the fuck do u suppose i should go about doing that?#yea i've done some dumb shit in my life#no i am NOT about to go INTERFERING with the CROWS
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Honestly, no one is doing it like Vinsmoke Sanji. He's royalty. He's homeless. He's a convicted criminal. He is a damsel in distress. He's a knight in shining armor. He takes down the Government at 10 am then makes a Bouchée à la reine from scratch at 11. He has the empathy of a buddhist monk in the Himalayas. He will beat up a 90 year old. He has never given a fuck, he cant sleep at night cz of how much he cares. He is a ballerina. He sets his legs on fire. He is a slut. He is a virgin. He is a feminist He is a pervert. He's a fashion icon. He wears Alexander McQueen suits to the beach. He has never known happiness. God has personal beef with him.
#no one can be you CUNTJI#his duality his consistency#let's go kingji#One piece kinda goated with this king#one piece sanji#black leg sanji#vinsmoke sanji#sanji#one piece#hmm i can see the tags where many of yall are saying sanji isnt a vinsmoke#i havent really reached that far in the show im starting impel down next so idk all ik is it's supposed to be his family name#so im guessing his family is fucked up thats why u ppl are so worked up im not surprised tho all sexy ppl have problematic families#kuroashi no sanji
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i hate you ai art i hate you "unalive" i hate you youtube premium i hate you twitter 8$ checkmark i hate you nfts i hate you therapy app advertisements i hate you non-chronological timelines i hate you instagram reels i hate you subtle tiktok filters that cant be turned off i hate you family bloggers i hate you ads on true crime episodes i hate you facebook i hate you vr glasses on chickens i hate you dystopian social media
#sorry but genuinely sometimes i feel like we live in a fucking dystopia#i get ads of chat bots designed to look like cute girls who will listen to your problems and it. god#its so unbelievably strange in some indescribable way#how am i supposed to explain that the word unalive makes me want to tear my hair out#vent#rant#idk
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Fucking CRYING IM USING THAT PHRASE FOR EVERYTHING NOW
#My brother in ra what the fuck am I supposed to do with this?????#*gestures to all my trauma*#memes#meme#funny#haha#joke#jokes#mizismiz
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#bwark#pkmn leaks#can we stop labelling a bunch of devs as terrible for literally just writing mythology that didn't even make it inti the game and wasn't#supposed to be seen by the public#esp the people naming and shaming the person who wrote them like jesus christ there's literal doxxing going on rn can we be mature#and like i said last night we have our own fair share of fucked up fairy tales and folklore in the west#so this discussion is giving the vibes of ''anime is uniquely perverted unlike our pure and innocent western animation''#like why are we singling out japanese mythology here lmao#ofc you're allowed to be uncomfortable with the leaks. i am and im definitely glad they were scrapped. but can we also be mature about it#it literally is not as big or horrible on gamefreak's end as people are making it out to be#it was scrapped for a reason. it was too much for this video game for children. can we move on or are people gonna make the same unfunny#joke about it#ask to tag?
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when this movie comes out i might actually die.
#shadow the hedgehog#sonic movie#sonic movie 3#sonic the hedgehog#my bf decided to drop the trailer on my head like two hours before i have to go to CLASS how the fuck am i supposed to be NORMAL#shadow t hedgehog!
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can the cost of living like... chill
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he's so crazy we can't take him anywhere 😭🤣
#how atlus felt making the black mask design by far the most visually disturbing horrific thing witnessed by human eyes#what the FUCK is he wearing. what is that fucking OIL SPILL#didnt even BOTHER looking up a reference bc it was so hideous i didnt want to see it again.#“a persona users outfit reflects their desires and the manifestation of their persona” IS LOKI SUPPOSED TO BE A FUCKING ZEBRA???????????????#I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE THEY DID HIM SO DIRTY#ONLY GOOD THING ABT HIS OUTFIT IS THE SEXY SERRATED SWORD THAT COMES WITH IT#anyway i genuinely dont give a fuck if this isnt the canon design i refuse to draw that one#there is no way this bitch was the one behind all the mental shutdowns he looks like he cant even hold a sword 😭😭 stupid femboy twink😭😭#anyway i digress i loved watching his sanity rapidly deteriorate as he got the deer in headlights stare when he looked at you#anyway akechi flopped with this one 0/10 don't come back like this again#imagine dying in this fit not even the flames of hell would burn hotter than my unadultered rage 💀💀#persona 5#persona 5 royal#p5#p5r#goro akechi#akechi goro#lotus draws
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The guy at the bar: Are you two gonna fuck or fight?
Wade and Logan, few hours later:
#they couldn't decide i guess#one more before i go to sleep#deadpool and wolverine#honda odyssey#deadpool & wolverine#wade wilson#logan howlett#deadpool#wolverine#poolverine#deadwolf#deadclaws#the honda odyssey#oh i need to use this tag now that i discovered it#the honda hatefuck#they fucked in the honda odyssey#I'm crying this is also a tag now lmfaooo#I'm still laughing at this cuz this was supposed to be a joke but these screenshots literally look like they're fucking 😭😭😭
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Thurston's Orange Peel Theory
#this is exactly why i'm upset you fucking moron#this is not what a brother and sister are supposed to do
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pov you are jorge rivera herrans 5 minutes after causing your fans severe psychological damage
#WHAT THE FUCK#WHAT THE FUCKKKK#ODYSSEUS. ODYSSEUS WHAT THE FUCK.#THAT SHIT MADE ME EMOTIONAL. HELLO. *HELLO*.#epic the musical thunder saga#HOW AM *I* SUPPOSED TO SLEEP AFTER THAT. HELLO. HELLO. WHAT THE HELL.#epic the musical
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