#from the Financial Times no less
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Capitalism won’t deliver the energy transition fast enough . . . There’s too much to do, and given the urgency and the need to get the solution right, this isn’t a task for your favourite ESG-focused portfolio manager or the tech bros. The sheer scale of the physical infrastructure that must be revamped, demolished or replaced is almost beyond comprehension. Governments, not BlackRock, will have to lead this new Marshall Plan. And keep doing it. The western nations that did so much of the damage will have to finance the transition in the developing world — it is astonishing that this idea is still debated. Massive deficit spending will be necessary, not a new ETF. For all the cleantech advances and renewable deployment in recent decades, fossil fuels’ share of total global energy use was 86 per cent in 2000 and 82 per cent last year.
[...]
Either we ignore the consensus of the world’s best scientists and accept an ever-deteriorating climate, or we upend a multitrillion-dollar fossil fuel-based energy system created over decades. For obvious reasons it would be better to decarbonise and clean the energy system, avoiding the trauma of a ever-heating world, while trying to manage the political fallout. But powerful petrostates such as Saudi Arabia and the UAE — in charge of this year’s COP climate conference — won’t go quietly. The transition could put weak petrostates like Iraq in peril. Big Oil lobbyists will fight tooth and nail to stop change and influence elections. Saying the geopolitics of the energy transition will be volatile seems like an understatement.
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*tries to organize my thoughts*
*remembers i'm not in school and therefore beholden to neither heaven nor hell nor any man's grading system*
*joyously shredding & tossing all my carefully arranged 3x5 mental notecards into the air like so much beige confetti. raising my arms in victory, cheering raucously until i accidentally inhale bits of homemade confetti*
(*coughing up itty bits of paper like a cat evicting a hairball with a firm understanding of tenants' rights*) wait wat happens next
#i marie kondoed my thoughts and *i* feel great. but now my stream-of-consciousness has escaped containment#so many innocent bystanders at stake#every time i try to organize my thoughts i run out of plastic bins and have to make a trip to the container store where i get even more dis#racted so. you can't just hand me THIS brain and NO catalogue OR library classification system#and expect me to single-handedly sort through all this nonsense? bad form but fucking form not in my job description#aNYways. formal education sure did a FUCKING NUMBER on us huh#(a number i measure not in gpa or dollars of student debt.#but in the number of therapy sessions & medical debt it will take to recover.)#seriously folks. our education systems are...innately traumatizing for a huge number of students. and we NEED to address this.#the fact that it is culturally common for adults to have anxiety nightmares about school/exams...even decades later?#that is not cute. it is Alarming.#no one--much less entire generations--should be spending their developmental years in an environment of chronic stress & pressure & strain#and yet that is the reality for millions and millions of pre-teen and teenage and young adult students#this isn't healthy and it serves and empowers NO ONE#...except of course the many exploitative educational & financial & debt-collecting institutions thriving from the current balance of power#and of course it's a nefarious and powerful way to sabotage/erase the middle class#which billionaires and the wealth-inequality creators they finance couldn't possibly have any noteworthy interest in whatsoever#it's not like there's an elite group of people with huge financial incentives to drain/steal resources from the masses...#anyways sorry for going all Conspiracy Theory on you.#obviously the billionaires who control the vast majority of our resources and news and political campaign funding#are not tied to every single itty bitty social issue and i'm a silly billy to imply it#please tell elon musk to ignore this tweet i am so subservient and acquiescent#mr musky u r so good at inheriting slavery-built mining fortunes & buying other people's companies#& building rocket ships & fancy cars that do NOT explode/catch fire & also NOT running billion dollar companies into the ground#mr musky u r so talented genius billionaire playboy with 10 kids and ex-wives who find you creepy af babe u r basically iron man
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(clasps my hands) Hi everyone, i'm doing a quick interest check !
Please only respond if you would consider becoming a patron of mine! I want to see what site people would prefer the most and where my audience is. :-]
As for rewards, I have many ideas! From regular WIPS of all my work (school, commissions, boothing, etc), to Livestreams (If my internet allows it), to timelapses, etc! Also commission discounts :-)
#I'm kind of having a lot of financial anxiety right now but also have many goals in my life#So I'm deciding to really buckle my seatbe;t and ask the questions now#ourgh maybe i should have timed this for the americans. please pass this around if you know someone who likes our art I guess u_u#also!! If you have anything you want to see from us please leave a suggestion! I have ideas but maybe you have better ones#After this poll I might host a different poll on who would possibly become a patron ..#or possibly use the answers from this as my interest check on who would subscribe t all ^^"?#also i did the math. patreon and ko-fi would genuinely pay me the same thing. ko-fi doesnt take a cut but paypal's fees are GIGANTIC on kof#to the point where it doesnt matter ?? did you guys know that geez#patreon does take a cut but paypal's fees with patreon are less so >_>#thats why this interest check matters! I want to know who of you prefers what platform to see creators on :-)#mod stuff#EDIT ON THE MATH: everything i said is not TRUE.. Patreon would be a total of 10.9% and Ko-fi is a total of 7.9%! around those no's!#I did the math after talking to a friend who uses kofi for tiers and i did not know some information beforehand lol#polls
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next month me and my grandma are going to visit my godfather who lives in Spain, but instead of being excited (it's gonna be my second time abroad in my life) I'm anxious af, because even though I'm an adult I live with my parents and I need to tell my father about it. normal parents would - y'know - be happy that their children have opportunity to visit another country, but instead he's gonna be insufferable about it, because it's my mom's side of family and he despises my uncle. but what is he gonna do? kick me out of the house even though he promised that as long as I'm studying or working I don't need to worry about such thing, humiliate me as usual, tell me that I'm childish and spoiled or make my mom's life a living hell again? I'm aware of the fact that the longer I'm putting it off the worse his reaction is gonna be, but I'm just not mentally able to tell him that, because I don't know how he will react. I don't need any money from him, I don't have to use my phone during this trip (I dunno how the roaming and stuff work), I just want to be sure he's gonna behave like a proper human being towards my mom and my siblings when I won't be at home and not act like a total asshole while talking with me about it.
#i know that at my age i should be more mature and handle such situations better but as long as he's the way he is it's impossible#why can't both my parents be normal#and the fact that i wasn't able to get any summer job this year isn't making it any better because i know it's gonna be one of his argument#(czaicie to że nawet do żabki mnie nie chcieli. dosłownie emotional i brain damage)#'you didn't work so from where do you get the money for that'#don't worry definitely not from you because you can't even pay for my monthly train ticket to college#and at the same time have the audacity to call me dumb for commuting there instead of living in that city#while knowing that neither me nor mom can afford renting anything without your help#(okay i'm a bit exaggerating in my mom's case but she earns much less than him and he still makes problems with literally anything#even buying food even though he's in a very good financial situation and there are times when my mom has to make everything work all alone#because he's getting mad at her out of nowhere and only pays the bills that fortunately aren't that bad in our case)#(and unfortunately the bills include my telephone subscribtion because all of our numbers are in some kind of special offer where you pay#much less for one number when they're registered for one person so it's another problem in this situation because when i offered paying for#mine he refused and probably it'll be his another argument for becoming mad that i dare to spend time with the part of family that cares#about me unlike majority of his relatives)#i hope that at least when academic year starts i'll be able to get any part-time job on the weekends so i can save up more money#although i'm not sure if i'm gonna move out in the nearest future. i mean he's fucking insufferable and toxic but i just can't leave my mom#and especially siblings there even though i can't even fucking protect them from literally anything. at this point i'm just powerless.#there are times when he tries to change for the better but then he starts creating problems on purpose and everything is coming full circle#and the sole thought that my little siblings would tell me that i just ran away from this problem is fucking killing me.#niedziela wieczór i humor niegituwa. zawsze kurwa kurwa coś.#chuj idę słuchać myslovitz#pau.txt
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has it really been only one week since my last therapy session. feels like it's been a month
#in that time i have a) learned i will be kocked out of my apartment in less than three months time#b) come out to my sister with moxed results#c) realized that i need to look into buying an apartment instead of just renting somewhere new bc it actually might be more feasible#learned so much about the whole process. spent so many hours googling and looking for places and learning abt it all#oh and i had a research article/book chapter get published somewhere in all this#anyway this week i have four apartment viewings two financial advisor appointments and a realtor appointment. also work#at least I'm off work from next week until december#I'm dyig scoob
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Actually, on the topic of the baby fever. God it's so frustrating. Bc when I was like 14 ish I was Adamant that I never ever wanted kids. And my dad said smth around the lines of "that'll likely change" (probably from his own experience with this) and I was like NO. it WONT.
And then eventually, age 21-22 ish, I admitted that Okay, I still don't want to have my own kids, but someday maybe I'll adopt...
And Now, 27 years old, I got the general baby fever on occasion. It Did fucking change. And I don't know if I actually WILL bother with having my own kid (I still don't want to go through the hassle and massive body changes). But god. I do see a fucking baby and feel that stab of longing. It's almost like my damned hormones betrayed me or smth. Maddening!
I shall simply write fanfic about it.
#speculation nation#pregnancy ment/#honestly though i hadnt felt the wish to have my own until after my dad died#and i realized just how small our family is getting. and just felt this stab of NEED. to continue the line. continue the family.#my family's fucking dying around me i need to add to it. need more family. yknow?#so i dont actually know if this is. because of hormones or because of grief or What#but it was enough for me to put the hysterectomy idea on hold. bc id been genuinely considering it back in like. april? or so.#but then this happened and now im like. fuck dude. i dont know. but the uncertainty's enough to keep me from doing it.#yeah i dont wanna deal with periods anymore. but also. i need more time to decide.#i think no matter what i do want to raise kids someday. once im more stable (financially and emotionally)#but whether thats adoption or putting myself thru fuckin body torture. well i'll just have to decide. later.#maybe the deciding factor will be my own body aging lol. if i wait too long. my body will decide for me. who knows!#i Have thought about what id do if i got accidentally pregnant. especially relevant back when i was sleeping with a trans woman#and used to be id abort no hesitation. but well. i mean abortions illegal here anyways rn so id have to go to another state#but if i decided it i could make it work. it's not That far of a trip.#but. when i thought about it. the concern was less about the theoretical baby. and more about finishing school.#thinking 'man itd be fucking awful to finish school if i got pregnant right now'. but not. hesitating over the baby.#if i was out of school and relatively stable and i got accidentally pregnant. then. well. Maybe.#so me doing my dad vash au where he gets accidentally pregnant and goes all in with it#thats me. sorting out my feelings on it i guess. putting them somewhere.#idk. it's a lot to think about. i dont want to condemn a child to my genetic problems. but at the same time...#i dont know. To Be Decided Later.
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Aaah. So it's neverending huh.
#my dad had been bugging me about getting a raise for months#it took me a while to actually find who to email to ask and how to go about it too.#but i did it! and i went from 19$ to 20.72$#and i was happy with that#and originally i wasnt going to tell my dad but he wasnt letting up about it and when i told him the numbers#he was dissappointed.he told me he spoke to people working from another company and they make 25#this was while i was stuck out on the supposed to be a hike but was actually hunting trip#now i just feel bad about it again. and i cant get my good feeling back goddamnit#i know its out of love/concern because hes very financially very successful and its tough seeing your kids work so hard and still be poor#but hey im now technically making 40 cents less than your daughter whos a doctor.#you graduated during a time where universities had skip days and they were less focused on proper essay formats#you also had living accommodations where apparently you could make your whole rent in a week of work#you also didnt need to pay for internet the way we do#you also had rrsp matching and Christmas bonuses and health insurance and company retirement funds#you had days off. you ask if i get a certain holiday off. like i havent worked full days christmas eve and boxing day the previous 5 years#also gas probably wasnt 80$/week just to go to and from work#and thats if you work and live in town#we had a phone call and he brought up my wage again this morning
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made an online order and forgot about duties AGAIN like please please please dont be bad. please im BEGGING YOU FEDEX
#had to pay 60$ for a shirt once… 40$ another time for smth that weighed less than 2 lbs….#theyll put it on ANYTHING from the states but my sword from france got in with no duties or questions asked#t#anyways its out for delivery. terrible financial decision but its smth ive wanted for ages
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I'm being forced to visit my abusive grandma to deal with my childhood traumas and grow up as person(already ended crying and visiting the clinic because of that) so with that said
What is it to be an adult for you ? One of the expectations is for me to be able to become an adult since I will be 23 when I get back so...
I think you shouldn't need to confront your trauma Like That to grow up as a person tbh i'm no psychologist but it feels counterproductive. Abusive people should be put behind you, not at your side. Stay safe, and stay strong, bestie, i'll be keeping you in my thoughts🫂
As for me, being an adult is a subjective thing. I'm not sure? I think "responsibility". Having more of them, and being okay-ish at keeping the strings together. -ish, i emphasise. Nobody can keep all the strings together, but trying your best is part of it. You gain a bit more independence, but you end up losing a lot of that freedom you gain to responsibilities. But i'd still say adulthood comes with additional freedoms. I hope the expectations placed on you aren't some shit like "get a (good) job" or "become fully independent, financially and otherwise" bc for me that's awfully individualist and might not be feasible for every adult (like, a disabled adult might not be able to keep a job that is exhausting, whatever "exhausting" might mean to them - could be the medical profession known for a lot of overtime and sleepless nights, could be an office job where you have to stare at screens that cause eyestrain for too long etc etc).
But i think it does include some independency. Dependant on the person. YMMV. I think i'd leave it up to the individual to define, beyond the biological "maturity/end of puberty" or sociological "minor/adult" divide
#like for me adulthood comes with independence (emphasis on the financial) because for me i don't think i'll be able to#feel like an adult for as long as i'm dependant on my parents#but i can't say ''emotional maturity'' bc i think there's something wrong with me on a psychological level#and i mean this unironically and seriously#that genuinely prevents me from achieving that emotional maturity and still makes me feel emotions like a toddler#(like best i can do is control my reactions but then i just have my tantrums when i'm alone and tend to take my feelings out on myself)#for me it's about enjoying the freedom of planning my own day and week bc my parents control(led) my free time#(present tense bc they still do when i come home for holidays)#stuff like that. i think in that case for me adulthood is about the separation from your parents/parental figures#separation thru identity happens during puberty i think#so i guess it makes sense that that emotional and physical separation and changing of the dynamic#from dependant/supporter to more or less equal individuals would be the end of puberty and onset of adulthood#it's a philosophical debate i think#what're your thoughts on it?
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Anthony Ainley guests as medical specialist Josef Kerston, a doctor but also (shock!) a villain, in The Adventurer: The Bradley Way (1.4, ITC, 1972)
#fave spotting#anthony ainley#the adventurer#doctor who#the master#ainley!master#classic doctor who#itc#1972#the bradley way#perhaps villain is a little unfair; it's briefly established that Ainley's doctor is a genuine medical professional whose involvement in#the villains' plot is because of pressure being applied on his family behind the iron curtain (so... does Gene defeating the#baddies plan get Ainley's family killed?? who knows‚ but i can't imagine it would lose Mr World's Greatest Everything any sleep)#he may not have been The Master yet but Ainley was a fairly regular face on tv at this point in his career. earlier in 72 he'd been a#co lead in ATV's spy thriller Spyder's Web‚ as well as recently guesting in high profile series like Elizabeth R‚ The Shadow of the Tower#and Out of the Unknown. he'd even recently made film appearances‚ with strong roles in The Blood on Satan's Claw and Assault#really this was his busiest period; by the time he was making Dr Who Ainley was more or less financially secure and didn't need to work#(famously he just absolutely loved being The Master‚ and it was more or less all he did from the 80s onwards until the end of the classic#series secured his retirement). i can't honestly say that he attacks this role in the same way as he did the Master‚ but then it's not much#of a part all told; he's just there to be doctorly and occasionally suggest sinister things are afoot. but always nice to see him pop up
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me and the generic extra strong Tylenol and the pure rage in my system
#Every once in a while I think. It’s not too bad home. I’m over dramatic. It’s not bad and it won’t be bad when I go home and never been bad#Then actually think and remember#I shouldn’t have been hit as a small child. I thank god that my parents stopped that with me.#But also. I should have been taken seriously when I went To them with concerns and shouldn’t have been brushed off.#But also to be a 14 something year old and to realize your parents aren’t in love is a crushing feeling#Since that must have been when. 13-14. Appa passed. Pandemic times. I’m sure my father. Since this would have been the last time I saw Appa#We went down to visit. Dad didn’t go he had work. He sent us off. I remember sitting in the passenger seat by mom in driver#Dad praying for our safe travel and for him going in for a kiss and the moment of hesitation and unwant from my mother#And the awkward silence and the way everything seemed to just shift to the side#That was summer of 2019. My first time realizing my parents weren’t both in love happened when I was 13-14.#I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.#And going to college has me feeling so guilty. Like I fucking ditched my siblings? The kids I raised as a child myself?#(I had to go. I don’t know if my scholarship would have held I don’t know if my financial aid would have held. I couldn’t have waited. )#(I would have likely done something bad to myself. Genuinely. If I weren’t able to be here. If I had to stay. I wouldn’t survive that.)#my siblings are fine. They have no responsibilities. My sister is manipulative. They will manage. They want me to get the education I need#They aren’t going to have to use their own college money to pay to be able to eat because the parents won’t feed them for the summer#I went into college with at least a couple hundred less than I should have. Because I had to parent. I had to feed my siblings.#And I had to pay to fill the gas tank on my father’s gas eater truck. We couldn’t be home because of the selling home situation.#I had to do something to get us out and to feed us but I didn’t get paid back for anywhere near all of it#I don’t regret it. But a kid shouldn’t have to pay for them and their siblings to live.#But then I remember the dread I have for returning ‘home’ for the breaks. I don’t know what I’m going to do.#If I can’t work all of the breaks then I either won’t be able to pay next semester#Or I’ll have almost no money in savings. Like nothing to my name. Can’t buy gas. Can’t do anything. Can’t buy food.#Unless the next scholarship stuff I’m doing pulls through. But I’m willing to work the whole break just to get away from either house.#I want to violently shake my parents and get them to comprehend#Father you have dropped 260$ into my bank account in the last two weeks. Why could this not be earlier in the semester.#Why couldn’t that be in the time and fashion you FUCKING PROMISED for helping me pay my schooling?#You have money to spare. Stupid. Why couldn’t you help like you promised.#Mom you fucker. I get that you are kinda with a new man now. But you’re leading yourself into a relationship with a man you said yourself#You don’t want to date because he wants to move away with his sister and because he hates it here
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it must be weird to work at the mint. like I spend all day at the Machine That Makes Money so that I can get paid with the money that I made today
#my musings#i'm sure they don't actually get paid from the bills that were freshly printed. those bills are sent out to banks and financial institution#and the workers are probably paid with checks. or in the modern times maybe even electronic bank transfer#Regardless!! I'm sure whatever the workers at the mint are paid it's less than the quantity of bills they produce
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Thank you for everything you do for PL women. You are the bravest PL warrior ever o7
Happy to serve o7
I like things but I don't like when said things have obvious misogyny so I usually end up going "FINE. I'll fix it MYSELF."
I love adding detail to underwritten female characters 🥰 makes the "11 year old shonen fan who would latch on to any passing woman in her animes like a stray puppy because there was no main character with her gender" in me very happy.
#on that note i think non binary kids deserve financial compensation from every cartoon they've ever seen#but i disgress#how does one write a character as compelling as Claire but then refuse to give her ANY screentime how tf does that happen#like if Claire was my character I would at least add a scene where she gets to the future and realizes she's going to die#why does Dimitri finding her body get animated but Claire arriving in the future only get a passing mention hmmm#Claire would be far less ignored by fanon if she wasn't ignored by canon#anyway happy Flora Friday everyone! I'll see if I can take the time to draw her today :3c#mutuals#another-clive-blog#pl spoilers#professor layton spoilers#<-because of the tags
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life is bad and i’m filled with rage
#bumbles (bee mumbles)#i’m thinking about my dad and my grandparents and extended family#how all of them knew we were being abused neglected and did fucking less than nothing#how my grandpa was supposed to be providing financial support and we only learned after he passed away that he ignored my grandmas will#i just keep thinking over and over as i’m struggling with my life emotionally and financially#like things could have been better if there had just been… a a small amount of kindness#or ppl actually doing their jobs#it doesn’t even have to do with how bad things are right now#but sometimes i get so fucking bitter about how things could have been#i keep thinking how much i wish my parents hadn’t had so many kids#how i wish i had never been born#that there was no reason i was born#that i’m just another fucking piece of trash in a hoarders collection#that i’m loved more as a possession than a child#idk why i’m here#i didn’t ask for this#i’m so angry and sad#i feel like every time i stand up someone pulls the rug out from under me and gets pissed that i lost my balance
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I kind of want to try making mead or ambrosia 👀
Obviously not right now because I have Shit To Do; but maybe during the summer after I’ve moved
#alcohol mention#Apparently you can make mead out of honey and I love honey so of course I have to try it#I want to make more food from scratch so I can reduce my plastic consumption#because my ten-year goal is to convert to a completely anticapitalist zero-waste lifestyle#Just for me… I don’t put pressure on anyone to do the same unless they’re well-off and being ridiculous about their consumption#Except for maybe encouraging people to switch to reusable water bottles if they’re in an area where the tap water is potable#(like where I live)#or flaunting my canvas shopping bag that I got for 5 dollars at a hardware store whenever possible#Okay I guess I do push people a little bit#But it’s all reasonable things directed at people I know are physically mentally and financially able to do those things#or I’ll just casually mention microplastics and pollution in conversation as a “fun fact”#But I’m not ridiculous about it with anyone but myself#I hold myself to some weird standards that I don’t hold others to and I’m fine with it#Obviously it’s the corporations’ faults that everything is the way it is and no single person can make a huge difference#But if everyone does one thing to help the planet; then it might buy us some time to change the system#There is also the issue of supply and demand; if more people reduce plastic intake then less plastic will be produced#But again: it’s very hard to be ethical in this society. EVERYTHING enjoyable is packaged in plastic and it sucks#(ok not literally everything but consider: most candy is wrapped in plastic and clothes have plastic tags and chips are in plastic#sushi is in plastic containers and meat is in shrink wrap or styrofoam and most modern chewing gum is a byproduct of vinyl#toys are packaged in plastic etc. etc.)
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#so for the last like. as long as i can remember. ive had a shit sleep schedule#mostly like sleep all day and stay up all night kinda shit#but i got sick/burnt out recently and slept for almost two days straight#and somehow it reset my sleep schedule to something normal#like i went to bed at 10pm and woke up at 5am for the last few days#and i havent had to nap#and the not needing to nap is really fucking with me#like im used to waking up. feeding my dog. and then napping until i go to work#i should be napping rn. but im not tired#i dont have to get ready for work for another four hours and ive already been awake for three hours#i went to the coffee shop and to walgreens. im in real clothes instead of pajamas. i did a load of laundry#im laying in bed (its so hot i might be dying) and i just. dont know what to do with my time#im probably gonna do some cleaning and packing because im moving in two months#idk im just feeling some strange type of way because for the last few days ive been. alive#instead of sleeping my life away#its so strange. i got sick. slept for a few days. and now my biggest problem is just fixed? and i can have a life now?#its 70 degrees today and the world is my oyster. what should i do?#i have a list of chores im gonna do. i might walk to the coinstar machine so ill have money#yeah i want to do that cuz im in the negatives in my bank account but i want to get a cool drink before work today#my dad texted me this morning 'noticed your bank account is overdrawn for the second time this week. whats going on kid?'#which is such a sad text to get because i know im broke. thanks dad. lets pls ignore my financial hardships#if you want to make my dad less sad hmu for my venmo /hj#anyways ill probs do that today. get some cash so i can get a frozen lemonade from wawa or something#yknow that post thats like 'seasonal depression seems fake until its 50 degrees in march and it feels like you took a party drug'#i think thats partially whats happening here. its 70 degrees and sunny and my systems dont know what to do with that#i hope youre all having a great day that you dont sleep through. i love you!!
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