#for now im just gonna enjoy the game
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4 other applicants have come in clutch for the apartment I'm hunting. If I'm still eligible I'll know tomorrow, but only to be called for a showing, if the others in the queue accept and have better conditions than me, I'll lose it. But my agent is still hopeful. Fingers crossed.
#its not the end of the world if i lose it -- ill just lose time and have to search for another one. i really don't want that but yk.#shit never works out precisely how you want them to#i spoke to my brothers and another kinda viable option is to move to spain for a while and he will drive me and nana#i wouldn't mind but jesus. the hassle. but at least it's warm 💀#oki back to writing my concept slice of a hg called 'the healers hands' but I'll post about it tomorrow huhuhu#i have a few concepts that might turn into a game and some smut baking in the back of my mind as that is what is winning the poll#but i have to be honest. smut is so hard to write rn with everything... don't want to say exactly but#it's just a sensitive topic lmao. ill push through but right now im enjoying writing some cozier flirting instead. some tension. i love it.#hope you're doing well#also anon on smut commissions i will get back to you! hope you see this 💀 im just gonna decide what my main project will be and then!!
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Genshin Spoilers
Okay okay lemme cook for a second.
Anyone else find the blood purity and relations shit weird?
Like what we know now is that Caribert died at age 8 in the creation of the loom of fate. So therefore Caribert has no heir and was also regarded as an illegitimate child by Clothar and that his mother is of Mondstandt origin. So he is not pureblood which is why he was turned into a hillichurl.
We can make assumptions that Clothar had no other children with this woman or if he did, they are still monsters and not able to repoduce, so therefore there are no halfblood heirs of Clothar.
Next I have to talk about race and geography since I’m such a nerd about this crap. So many characters should have darker complexions based on how much sun they get (Sumeru desert, Natlan, and Liyue, PLAYABLE character not just NPCs.) Like if Mualani looks dark compared to 90% of the cast, we have a problem.
So let’s assume Teyvat is a globe and it’s laid out on a flat map for us to see. Let’s also assume that the climate is similar to earth. Let’s assume the equator is around the center so like above most of Liyue and Sumeru. Parts of Mondstandt being based on Italy, it should have a medeterranean climate, therefore melanin, but I digress. Okay so the Sumeru deserts and Natlan are close to the equator. Inazuma would be closer to the South Pole and has a harsh climate hence people not getting sun. (This is also ignoring places like Fontaine which is based on France, where yes, Black people exist in real life, but I digress). The only playable characters with dark(er) skin as well as NPCs are from Natlan and Sumeru (and also Xinyan for some reason).
We also know from Dainsleif, Halfdan, and the Sinners, that they use Norse names. Also Khaenri’ah being underground would mean they got little to no natural light. So it’s safe to assume pureblood Khaenriahs are white as fuck.
With this knowledge, wtf is going on with Kaeya?
We also have to examine how this curse works. If all the non pure bloods were turned into monsters, it’s safe to assume they can’t reproduce. Also judging by Kaeya very clearly being a child in the past and growing up with Diluc, it’s safe to assume that the modern Khaenri’ahns have a normal lifespan (unless being halfblood is what dictates that). It may have diminished or weakened over time, throughout the generations. We don’t know the exact mechanics but we can assume that Kaeya has a normal lifespan. I know Hoyo is gonna try to say he’s pureblood and not explain stuff but logically, no. When he sees Dain he comments “you’re a pureblood Khaenri’ahn” implying that, he, Kaeya, is not that. Also there’s the Sumeru trip when he was young. Assuming that his father is the one with the Alberich surname, which makes sense judging by how surnames usually work, we can assume that Kaeya’s mother was the one who isn’t Khaenri’ahn.
We can assume that the only Khaenrians who could reproduce from that original cursed generation were the ones who retained human form (pure bloods). We can also assume that Kaeya is a descendent of one of Clothar’s pure blood children. He probably had an affair with Caribert’s mother out of wedlock. We can also assume that more blood mixing naturally occurred over time. So either Kaeya’s family has been mixed for awhile and it’s no big deal, or more likely, Kaeya’s father had an affair with Kaeya’s mother out of wedlock. Judging by how dark he is compared to the majority of characters, his Indian inspired outfit for his in-game skin, the trade trip to Sumeru, when he was young, and the geographical proximity, it’s safe to assume that Kaeya’s mother is probably Sumerian (and likely from the desert and Eremite affiliated). I could go deeper into what I think may have happened but for sake of brevity, it’s very possible and likely that one reason Kaeya was sent as a spy and to Mondstandt and not made an heir to the clan has to do with the fact that he’s an illegitimate child.
Okay, another additional note. Ragnvindr is a Norse name, make of that information what you will.
#sorry but I overthink everything#I have autism#genshin impact#Genshin spoilers#kaeya#khaenri'ah#wtf is going on#abyss order#I have questions#I’m not trying to be racist I’m only observing how the game itself uses skin tone#which is obviously a problem because dark skinned people exist in European countries#and don’t get me started on Sumeru and Natlan#im white but genuinely enjoy diversity because if everyone was like me that would be boring#all types of diversity like race gender age ability etc#if they’re gonna take from those cultures they should commit#point is that this is a separate issue#but something is still up with kaeya#im just observing what’s actually in the game#plus the clothes and stuff#like Kaeya’s alt outfit#no way that dude is Norse#also like geographically#if tayvat is similar enough to earth#it’s not gonna be 1 to 1#but you get the idea#when they made kaeya their either had some big lore planned or were just trying to be diverse and are now backpedaling#if he’s descended from Clothar and he’s normal age the curse must have faded through generations#also question where are all the other immortal people from that curse#where is Clothar#unless I missed something
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New game interest unlocked
(crow in bottom right belongs to @patchwork-crow-writes)
#ramarl#phantasy star online#long tag warning lol i rambled#so i was introduced to phantasy star online#i think its safe to say i really enjoy the game#thank you mr crow for showing me this game :D i have new creatures to scribble now#there shall be more of these doodles#i promise you that#meant to post this wayyyyy earlier today but uh#my car broke down :') ....again :')#last week it wouldn't turn on and the headlights weren't working so we were like ''ok this is a battery issue and i need a new one''#because jumping the car didnt fix it#so we took my old battery to a shop and they tested its charge before showing us which new one we should get#but the battery had charge???????? so we went back home to troubleshoot#and then found the hooks(?idk what they're called) that connected the battery to the car had something corroded on them#so we grabbed a can of coke and scrubbed away#hooked the battery back up and bam car was working#so the issue was those hooks#until two days ago when my car didnt work again#looked at the battery again and the hooks came loose; tightened them up and bam car working again#and now at this point I'm scared to go anywhere cause what if i get stranded on my own??#so this morning i said ''alright I'm gonna drive myself to church just to be sure that my car works''#AND WOULD YOU GUESS WHAT HAPPENED#at this point i just wish the damn battery was dead and that i could replace it and move on from this#i know they're a bit pricey but jesus this is exhausting#but i can't just buy a new battery if im not sure that's the actual problem because then I'd have a battery and nothing to do with it#i hate having a car sometimes i just want a bus system#or a jeep#but preferably a bus system#sorry rambles thats a long way of saying i didnt post this earlier because ive been working on my car lol
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I feel like I'm in the middle of crossfire between 'go touch grass' and 'video game projection is my life' people
#i like to talk about my favourite video games like it's serious knowing theyre fictional and its not that deep#wotever im just gonna... continue doing my thing over there 👹#to note: im just surprised that this situation is NOW gaining fronts about something so personal as enjoying video games 😂#both sides not minding their business at all#this was prompted out of this person shitting on spawn astarion and being too dramatic over ascended being god's favourite or something#why is it so deep#but also why not get deep 😂 just dont shit on ppl when u do it#its a good thing that an online community will find menial reasons to dispute against each other👹
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light-hearted scribblings today
#witch hat tag#orufrey#last ones kinda in relation to a line from “kinou nani tabeta” a BL about an ageing gay couple who cook. that shirahama enjoys. of course#cause oru just looks like a stereotypical japanese gay guy and it's endearing to me.#Will we ever learn literally anything about his family and more than one page about his past. Will we though.#i was gonna draw more today but every day. Every day there is baldur's gate 3. even now#i love witch hat kitchen so much. i love waking up and thinking about my gay witches and playin my lil game im glad im alive and safe.
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it's important to keep in mind that RGGS is making games for 1) to make money and 2) the ENTIRE fanbase which is way more broad than just the fandom. Majima is and historically has been the most popular character. the gaiden-style game only just proved itself to have potential. of course RGGS is gonna have Majima headline the second gaiden game. Plus the story jumps off IW so people who boarded the franchise with that entry can pick this up without having to worry too much about previous installments. RGGS wants the game to be successful so these choices shouldn't be surprising (one would think...)
^^^
#snap chats#couldnt have said it better myself friend#unrelated whose car is outside my house i almost thought it was my friends vJEALVKEAJKLJ#ok Related Now but yeah !!#rgg doesnt make fanservice per say but they acknowledge what the community is into and make games with that in mind#i cant for the life of me think anyone was ACTUALLY surprised that yk3 wasnt announced or whatnot#My Personal Theory Again just follows after majima disdain and richardson coming back thats my theory based on observation#its just that the sentiment has blown up THIS much is the real appalling part liiiike oh wow .... mates are Mad mad#i still cant comprehend stopping enjoying a thing or drawing a thing just cause of something like this#but i aint gonna tell people how they oughta feel their feelings are their feelings. i will however say it just a wee funny vELKVEAJ#anyway im outta grapes this is a NIGHTMARE
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hiiii ^^ beastlife fishie analysis. spoilers ahead. etc etc
okay so. the main point of this is simple. I don't think the salmon head cursed c!fishie. Explaining that is the harder part I think. also i'm going to refer to the salmon head thing in e5 as "the incident" from here on out because frankly i think it's funny
Let's start with the incident. The big day. etc. What happened? Why did it happen? Obligatory third questioning statement? Well. She was gifted the salmon head for her birthday by kiwi(or like. someone in the kiwibird system. -bird system. the birds). Immediately upon receiving it she relives parts of season one and fishie herself doesn't really acknowledge it. The other players definitely notice but im not caught up enough in any other pov yet to like have thoughts on that I'll come back to that point someday. Fishie seems shaken, sure, but she moves on so quickly, especially considering what happened just there. 37 seconds of standing frozen, unresponsive. she recovers in 5 seconds. And seeing how she reacts later on to realizing the memory situation--if she was aware that happened, she would probably be concerned by it. She puts it on for a brief second at the end of the party and takes it off immediately. She's otherwise normal -- well. as normal as she is otherwise up to that point. Because that is also how she acts with pretty much any salmon head, even just kiwi herself.
I raise: Episode one, about 8:20 in. The slow zoom on kiwi as the static overtakes every other noise. This is the *exact* same behavior displayed when fishie receives the salmon head, albeit without actual concrete old video footage style flashbacks. In episode two (28:55ish) the same thing happens when she looks at the salmon head in moch's house, but this time there is technically a flashback -- kiwis grave. Fishie moves on immediately and doesn't acknowledge her behavior at all, and, seeing as it is fishie, im inclined to believe that means she does not know she is doing it. Fishie (when alone) will discuss all of her problems in immense, and usually misguided detail (bestie i promise kiwi doesn't hate you???) to the audience and/or herself. I mean she's not alone in episode one, and it is technically presession, and i guess getting struck by lightning is a decent distraction from your problems, but in episode two? She is completely alone. There is nobody with her. She went looking for moch and moch is not there. She still doesn't acknowledge the fiveish seconds she is completely frozen. This happens again and again with kiwi and salmon heads.
And then that leads you to e5. The incident. She's. well. she's doing worse. 0:50. "This will distract me if i leave it up." This is the first mention from fishie herself about how fucking weird she's being, and even then she doesn't seem concerned. I think she does not realize she's being so so incredibly weird about it. If the static and freezing is what's referred to as "distraction" then keeping it in her inventory makes it worse actually so it wouldn't really make sense unless the way it is distracting her is NOT the. well. whatever the fuck is wrong with her (affectionate). After she puts the head on there's the static all the time but for a short brief amount of time she's like significantly more normal and i don't really know if that means anything i just think it's really funny.
And then we all know what goes on during the incident i'm not analyzing this video frame by frame. um. i could. but i am not going to right now. And then she has the conversation on the table with kiwi where she like is normal for 5 minutes. Like genuinely the most. i guess stable? fishie's thought process is is like in the moments directly after the incident. She is immediately understanding with the antikiwi situation, they come to an agreement that they're like. okay now. "thank you for everything and im so sorry i couldnt do more" / "it was short, but it was nice" "i knew what i was getting into when i married you" etc etc and then they kind of rush it at the end because people won't stop dying. But then fishie is fishie and takes it in the complete opposite extreme (from. um. whatever was wrong up until now. to "oh kiwibird must secretly hate me because" and then there's no real good reason she's just like that) and it's also an issue. And i think the season two memory thing is also a part of that but this is so long already and so i'm not going to get into it rn. So bringing all of this back to my original point: the salmon head was not the cause of the curse(?) because she's been so weird all the time forever and the salmon head thing was just like. an effect. of whatever went Wrong(tm) in the season transition. like the head was a vessel to Be Worse about it but i feel like it would have worked with any salmon head she got her hands on and that it happened to be kiwico was a coincidence and also that the head wasn't cursed at all there's just something deeply wrong with fishie s3 in general and uh yeah 👍
I'm so sorry this is so disjointed i had a thesis statement and everything. alas
#whisp whispers#fishie beastlife spoilers#since i had to rewatch videos these tags will serve as going insane about details i missed that were irrelevant to the post#i could make a whole thing on the parallels between fishie and bree. 'at least im not the only one with a troubled love life' yeah i guess#this is taking me ages to finish because if i think about beastlife fishie too long it genuinely spikes my heart rate#i think there's something wrong with me#fishie and bree both leaping at the oppurtunity to trade with their exes is so funny to me#someone should do indepth research about the way fishie interacts with dingo because i haven't been paying attention to it#by 'someone' i mean me because i'm the only one who can do that. other beastlife fan if you see this. holds out hand do you want#to make an analysis post with me .......#i appreciate kiwi trying so hard to do bug facts because bree's moth take is toooo insane for him. we can yes and the alien bit he draws th#line at incorrect moth facts though#'im neutral this is just fascinating' <-really funny in retrospect#*this is also taking so long forever because i keep distracted by whatever the fuck is wrong with everyone that i can't remember how to lik#put things into words#for what is a housewife without a house and no longer a wife?#'sorry guys it's just gonna be a lot of decorating today' YOUUUU. YOU. (<quote from beginning of e5)#ratchelor pad guitar riff is horrid on 2x speed. never do this what i'm doing right now#one of my irls is still in awe of the 6person boogie kill (or rather how nobody noticed fishie preparing the 6person boogie#is it boogey or boogie#does oku falling off a pillar and dying in the middle of fishie lore also count as a fishie proximity death#fishies curse is that people won't stop dying in the death games#also hiiiii fishieeeee you said you enjoyed analaysis. um. this one went a little off the rails i think and is more theory than analysis#posting this and disappearing off the face of the internet. cringe is dead but like. i mean you get it
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Just a small unasked-for update, since I said I'd update in a week and it's been almost two
Because this is how I have spent the majority of my free time last week
Not even done, re-written 5 different scenes, haven't done a re-read over half of it. I'm so deep in the trenches with this one there is so much baked in here... I hope you guys like a million random scenes that don't *have* to exist, but do.
(Also like 3 hours of that Firefox time is "research" aka watching baseball for this chapter)
#im starting to grow concerned that im overwriting#i mean i should have been concerned awhile ago#but. idk its not like theres any actual rules#i can have fun with them right...#im guessing most people just enjoy the dynamic and arent like. eager for this thing to have a climax and a conclusion#but if im wrong maybe i should stop writing chapters this long lmfao#cos a chunk of it really can just stay in my head...or i can cut#but i kinda assume people just wanna read it all#i guess we'll see!#ok im gonna try and finish this thing now#i est. i still have like 2k words to add... lol#what was i saying about overwriting?#ok it will probs get easier when im not trying to write scenes alongside a 4.5hr baseball game#ok bye#sugar daddy au
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casually glancing at the new mcsm fandom and seeing drama that makes me go???? theres drama for THAT now?????
#i could rant in tags bc ive been here since 2015 lol but i shant#(in the fandom since the game came out but not always active in the fandom esp not recently bc i dont like some of the drama recently lol)#also cmon yall we have like the same 3 rotating flavors of drama. most of us r adults now we gotta act like it stop getting mad abt ships -#- and what color suspenders or hair clips we like best lol just let ppl enjoy stuff#be cringe be free#“im not gonna rant in the tags” <-- rants in the tags lol
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Everyone be proud of me
I am eating dinner 👍
#speculation nation#u know when ur feeling bad enough u wanna do fuck all or like the most self destructive shit ever#and ur tryign to reign in the 2nd urge so ur just sitting there zoning out#i wanted to just go to bed. but i am eating something first.#i dont want to eat. i should be hungry but im not. but im still eating.#not gonna bother with the video game today bc itd probably just make me stay up until 6 am again and i wouldnt even enjoy it#emotions cut off bc it was the only way to calm down etc etc u know the drill#tomorrow... will be gentler. i'll make sure of it.#and for now. i am eating this leftover biryani. whether i want to or not.#negative/#disordered eating/#kind of lol. whatever
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Well that happened. That was a DLC.
#i havent even finished it yet but i got to the final boss phase 2 so its basically done#but uhm yeah#i have so so many thoughts (i wanna try hold em off til i beat the final boss - i want to read the lore) but basically:#music: 10/10 incredible as always#gameplay: 9/10#<- the new weapons the AREAS bro the areas some of the best in the game#and tbh most of the bosses i found fun#they are far from perfect (except you rellana girl i love youuuuuu) but most of them are great#<- final boss not included because i only just got to him today and tbh its like#fine ig but i KNOW its gonna be like messmer aka rip my frame rate#story: 5/10#why were the side line npcs better stories than the main crew#the main crew individually were honestly solid but the dlc as a whole really idk#im not sure how to describe it but the story is kinda just... there#tbh i knew miquella was gonna be a bastard i didnt believe that miquella the kind stuff for a second#and tbh hes a complex character#but idk its liek the whole story was about him but i feel im so lost on what was actually going on#so overall: i wanna say 9/10 even though i didnt vibe with the story i had so much fun with the dlc as a whole that it was worth it for me#i feel like from passing bits ive seen thats an unpopular opinion but idgaf i enjoyed it#now i need to go stare at rellana art and finish my tarnished riku piece#best part of the dlc was the drip actually the drip was peak#and a certain weapon#i could probably name drop it but its my new fav weapon its just a classic i love it to bits#elden ring spoilers#uh just in case
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old drawing I never posted. i like these two freaks, I should draw them more
#rubin#skironir#oc#rukaan#humanization#skironir is fully on board with the murder for the record. She likes rubin because he loves to kill people and she thinks it's cool and fun#someone warned her when she was like human-nineteen (im not sure how to translate caribou ages to humans LMAO could've been#anywhere from 19 to 25ish) that there was a weird loner freak eating out of the garbage and threatening people with knives and she went#'damn thats crazy. hes kinda hot. im gonna be his friend'#rubin (also approximately the same age as her) was like 'ive never had a friend before and im not going to start now. fuck off'#and then failed so hard at not having any friends that he fell in love like an idiot and now he's stuck with her forever and she can't get#rid of him. which works for skironir because she would be very sad if she did get rid of him#im not sure im gonna keep the she/her pronouns for skir. in all the stuff i've written for the deer game with skir i use he/him#but rubin using he/him pronouns in the mg!au also trips me up a bunch because i keep being like this is girl rubin he's a girl i made him#into a girl and now he's a girl. and then i get lost in the pronoun weeds LMAO#you undrestand#anyway i enjoy them a lot#very straightforward characters. they roll into town. they cause problems. they kill someone. they leave#i should make magical girl katjaana straight up just a dude. for balance. a dude who uses she/her and turns into a magical girl also#or maybe i could go full tuxedo mask with her.... idk#joke
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I just wanted to apologize to my classic whotuals for all the dead boy detectives spamming, but it's also important to me that you guys know two things:
a) I've become aware that a lot of what appeals to me about dead boy detectives is, on a kind of conceptual/thematic level, the same stuff that I love about my favorite eras of dr who, and 6b in particular
And I tell you this not as an advertising tactic but as a genuine PSA for anyone following me because:
b) Being me & having realized this, I know I'm definitely gonna wind up posting some unnecessarily long-winded analysis/comparison, pop it in the main tags for the sake of organization on my own blog, and subsequently confuse a hell of a lot of people there who either have no idea what I'm talking about or simply don't view either piece of media in the same light as I do to begin with
So I just wanted to reassure everyone that at least you're not suffering alone, as I will soon be inflicting the reverse bait-and-switch upon others!
That's all! continue w ur scrolling <3
#i hope this is clear but im REALLY not trying to be like coy or intriguing here#this post is not remotely intended to convince anyone to watch dead boy detectives on the grounds that it's similar to 60s who#in ways which i've conveniently failed to elaborate upon & so you'll just HAVE to go see for yourself#(firstly bc when i want to sing something's praises i will upfront & unapologetically)#(& secondly bc im not super into telling people to watch things in general unless they're actively seeking a rec)#honestly this (now very overhyped) future post of mine is going to be more about like#me recognizing i have A Type when it comes to stories/underpinning narrative backdrops in fiction (if thats not too pretentious)#and much less of a 'well if you like x then you'll definitely love y bc i do & we all enjoy things in the same way & for the same reasons'#and i find it funny that nobody will care - bc it'll incomprehensible to all but about 5 people who have the full context#& half of those 5 will probably still disagree w my perspective/interpretation of one or both -#but im gonna do it anyway bc what else am i supposed to do w these thoughts! keep them to myself??? dont be absurd#that said though if you are debating watching dbd and would like to chat about it to push yourself in one direction or another#im happy to do so! especially if you have questions about it in relation to some other shared interest you actually did follow me for lol#im always game for that sort of thing & yes i am of the opinion that its a good & fun & rich show all on its own
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i am like. disastrously bad at rain world i think
#pers#im enjoying myself a LOT im still having fun chipping away at progress but its Not a game im skilled at#i gave up on undergrowth and am headed through chimney canopy now trying to make it to pebbles#and just am completely stuck at the save room closest to the wall. i keep almost making it to the gate but not quite#ive got remix turned on to casual which is making it easier but still. its a hard game!!!!#i think thats a good thing overall i think its using its difficulty well#it just means that its gonna take me another 15 calender years to finish it and ill just pick away at it for a while
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hi ive officially finished omori
#i love this game so fucking much#i think this may be the first time i genuinely liked the entirety of a piece of media#i think this may be the first time i genuinely enjoyed and loved the entirety of. a Media#it (stephen king) is kinda up there too but omori is just. Its not objectively perfect of course but to me its real fuckin close to that#its like its Made for me#i just. god i fucking love this game. i love everything about it if i cld get into it blind again i wld do it#omori#my post#im just gonna lie down now
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can't stop thinkimg about modding games
#yapfest in tags...#.ctxt#modding games lowkey makes me feel productive...........#what happened to just enjoying and playing the actual game.#lol im going around in circles in my game library on what game to mod next#i restarted my sims 3 mods folder again after playing enderal a bit (i also added an enb and SMIM to it.... no more !)#(once i add in one mod i will eventually add more but i can limit myself ! i will enjoy enderal in its purest form ! enb doesnt count.....)#jokes aside im enjoying enderal a lot. legit cant believe it's a '''mod''' wtaf#anyways now im looking into minecraft mods again#i'm gonna add a bunch of mods - brick it - troubleshoot then play for like 2 hours then move onto the next game in rotation to mod.......#......... anyways i have so many unfinished games#i started hades 2 and disco elysium a few months ago#oh god also bg3.. i finished act 1#did a bit of act 1.5 (or the bit after) then never opened it again bc i couldn't be arsed to do a certain fight back then LMFAOOFOSO#idr how long ago this was but it was before they won goty and that major patch they dropped then too#fohhhh i remembered i finished the main quest for cyberpunk bc of phantom liberty n i just never got around to playing that and version 2.0#mainly bc i didnt want to update cyberpunk and my mods LMFAOOO#brain so silly sometimes bc i want to play the game but then i dont wanna play#also i think it's the exhaustion i (quickly) get from consuming the story LOL#maybe thats why i enjoy sandboxes and those brain-numbingly replayable shooter games....#damn i yap a lot in the tags#hiii#:3#trailing thoughts#idk if it's the term for it i cant remember anything#do i keep this in the drafts for myself or nah#goodnight gang...
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