#finally finished that essay!! also

[outlying-hyppocrate]

I DID IT!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK YEAH IT HAS BEEN DONE

[leenfiend]

what's ur type first < prev next >

[robinfollies]

KEEP THE DANGER OUT // KEEP THE DANGER IN

[legendoftherisingtide]

[intro]

Bakugou is a prideful, arrogant person. He holds himself to the highest standard; he is the best and everyone else is simply below him. Everything he has ever done was in pursuit of being number one, shining above the rest. He has to have a perfect victory, he has to be a perfect student, he has to win to save.

He pushes and pushes and won’t let anyone see his weaknesses or his insecurities. He can never lose, he can never fail, he can never show that he regrets or hesitates or that he hasn’t thought everything through. He must never be vulnerable in every sense of the word.

Then why is he standing in the rain.

To apologize shouldn’t be a sacrifice, but it is for Bakugou. To pour his feelings, to admit his wrong, to let down all of the walls he has built and be vulnerable. And in front of his whole class.

He is willing to sacrifice his pride, to fully sacrifice any superiority he could have, to bare his soul and even risk rejection. Because he knows Midoriya is more important. Because he wants him to come home, he wants him to know his true feelings, because he wants things to change. 

Because Midoriya has changed him. Midoriya has opened his eyes; by showing him he’s allowed to be open, that his feelings should be expressed, that he has so much to learn, and so much of that was learned through Midoriya just existing.

He isn’t sacrificing his safety frivolously because he’s expected to as a hero; he is doing it because he has grown. He is doing it because he has finally admitted to himself that he wants Midoriya to be with him and safe.

So I will sacrifice this for you. Not because it will change anything, as much as I want that I know that I can’t just fix all the wrong with just this. And I am willing to do as much as it takes to earn your forgiveness. But I don’t need that from you, not now and not ever if you don’t want that, I just need you to rest. I did so much wrong. And I am sorry for everything. You don’t have to do this alone. Lean on us. You are so strong and being supported doesn’t discount that. You’ve taught me that. 

I hate the rain. But I will brave it for you. 

He would do everything in his power, admit so many things, just to get Midoriya to take care of himself. We see him being the most vulnerable he has ever been in front of people that aren’t Midoriya. He does so much completely out of character, all in pursuit of being there for Midoriya. 

For Izuku.

He finally gets over himself and finally tells Midoriya the feelings he has felt for so long.

He lets go of this idea he is inherently better and finally acknowledges that his hatred for Midoriya has always been about his own shortcomings and insecurities. But he still wants to be better, they are still rivals. He isn’t going to sacrifice that part of him because that is just who he is; he is still going to push to number one.

But now it’s different.

There is verbal and vocal acceptance and respect. Before it was unspoken; their relationship had changed ever since Ground Beta. They were proper rivals, with mutual respect and care, they were actively making each other better.

But Bakugo finally verbalizes it and tells Midoriya, not only is he sorry, but he wants to actually have a proper friendship; he wants to continue to become better and earn his forgiveness. He wants them to push each other to be better, he wants to continue to fight for the top spot, he still wants to be the best.

But when did it become something else? 

When was the turning point when it started to shift from wanting to surpass Midoriya and be the best, to wanting to keep up with Midoriya and stay by his side?

Bakugou has already sacrificed himself for Midoriya before. His body moved on its own; with no hesitation, he would save Midoriya. He has already risked his life for him. But there is a layer to it that I don’t think people talk about. 

He tells Midoriya he shouldn’t try to win this on his own. 

He disguises his concern with an insistence that he’s in it to fight for himself when he initially joins the battle. But it is to fight by Midoriya’s side and support him.

But taking the hit for Midoriya, jumping in the way isn’t just support. This is sacrifice. This is giving yourself to ensure the safety of someone. And it was second nature. 

There are two reasons and both are a sacrifice of something in the moment.

It is knowing someone is so valuable, so great, in all senses of the word, that they must be protected. Bakugou is sacrificing his body and admitting that Midoriya needs to stay alive, for personal reasons and/or for the world. He needs Midoriya to be okay, Midoriya can’t fight alone and Bakugou will do anything to make sure he will be okay. 

But the sacrifice of ideology. 

With every development, he has relinquished parts of himself. When he sacrifices himself he is not only sacrificing his body but is admitting that he can’t do this on his own; he needs Midoriya too. This isn’t him wanting to be better than Midoriya, it’s him wanting to do it together.

Midoriya changed him.

He doesn’t die for Midoriya. He wakes up and just as his last thought was Midoriya, so was his first as he woke up. He runs to his side. People are dragging him back, trying to have him rest, knowing before he even said anything that he would lose his mind over Midoriya’s situation. 

Everyone sees how Bakugou feels about Midoriya.

He sacrifices himself because Midoriya can not die on him. Midoriya has to stay alive. Midoriya has to keep fighting. 

There can not be a world that doesn’t have him in it.

This is the culmination of what has been developing ever since the final exam where Bakugou finally works with Midoriya; the day that win to save, save to win was noticed. Then furthered after Ground Beta where they finally talked to each other and something changed within them both.

But the final sacrifice is the culmination of Bakugou’s character.

He knows what this decision will mean. Everyone screams for him not to. He knows that he is going to die. He knows he will not win this fight.

This isn’t dying for the cause. This isn’t just a hero complex. This is because he can help Midoriya and he will. This is for Izuku.

I will sacrifice myself for you. To give you more time, to give you even the slightest chance of winning. I will sacrifice myself for you because you are who can win. I am going to die. I am going to die and in my final thoughts, I will ask if I will still be able to be by your side.

It is no longer can I beat you. It is no longer can I surpass you. It is can I still catch up to you. It is can I still even be equal to you. He has already sacrificed the idea that he could beat Midoriya, that isn’t what he wants anymore. What he wants is to stay here with him.

I will sacrifice everything I am. I have wanted to be the best. All my life I have wanted to surpass you and everyone around me. But you. I will let that go for you. I let it go in my mind for so long now and I have never wanted to admit it. Is it even possible? Is it even possible for me to catch up to you? Is it even possible for me to stay by your side. I can’t be that anymore. I am sacrificing even that now. I will never be number one now. I will never become the person I always dreamed to be. I will never surpass you. I am forever sacrificing that now. I will die here.  

But can I still be with you?

The sacrifice of his life is him fully relinquishing everything he is, admitting that he can’t keep up, losing all of the progress he has made, letting go of everything that made up his character.

And the last thing on his mind is if he can still be able to be by Midoriya’s side.

He won’t let him go again. 

[fictionadventurer]

Everything I learn about Rose Wilder Lane makes me more and more aware that she was a hilariously outrageous person who needs a movie made about her immediately.

After leaving Missouri, she moves to California and marries a real-estate guy who once tried to get her to help him con the railroad.

She gets hired at a San Francisco newspaper known for its yellow journalism, where she does things like writing a series of columns featuring the "real-life stories of a police detective" who, in real life, was a high-end jewel thief.

Her first book is a first-person "autobiography" of Charlie Chaplin that she (after a few interviews with Chaplin) completely made up, and that Charlie Chaplin immediately threatened to sue her publisher for.

Her second book is a biography of Jack London, which his wife only reluctantly allowed her to write because Rose presented herself as "someone who had never written for the newspapers before and needs a chance to break into the magazines." This book was also almost entirely fictional, and her publisher also almost got sued over it.

Third biography is the first-ever biography of Herbert Hoover, also a heavily-fictionalized account. (Doesn't seem to have been sued for this one. Steps in the right direction!)

Traveled as a reporter through Europe (to places like Albania and Poland) post-WWI. (If we want to talk about legal things that she did).

Wrote a book based on Laura's late-childhood pioneer experiences while Laura was writing the early books of the Little House series, and did not tell Laura about it. (Laura was ticked off).

Kept trying to insert a story into Laura's memoirs (and Little House on the Prairie) casting Pa as a member of a posse that hunted down the infamous (and never-caught) serial-killing Bender family (despite the fact that this was historically impossible). (It got to the point that Laura herself told this story to the public as an example of "a true story I couldn't out in my children's book." Despite the fact, I say again, that this was historically impossible).

During WWII, endured a minor incident (it involved one cop coming to her house) where the FBI investigated her as a potential communist based on a postcard she sent that was critical of the government. Turned this into a short story that presented herself as the righteously-outraged American citizen fighting against an oppressive government, and used this to whip up a nationwide media campaign against J. Edgar Hoover for spying on American citizens.

Flew to Vietnam as a war reporter when she was in her seventies.

[mylucayathoughts]

Alex on his way back from Paris is one of the most underrated Taylor scenes in Red White and Royal Blue and I think he did such a splendid job there. It's underrated in the sense that, it's not as talked about as his coming out to Henry scene or lake scene or Kensington palace confrontation scene, mostly possibly because it's so short (about 9 seconds). But it's one of my favorites and it owns my heart 🥺♥️. I even talked about it a bit in my little moments series part 1, but not nearly enough.

To me, this scene was incredibly beautifully acted. Taylor poured his heart and soul into it. I believe he discussed it with Matthew extensively and put a lot of thoughts on his approach to it. He knew, the focus would be on his face and he had to portray the many emotions of Alex perfectly and boy did he deliver!

Alex was seen to be so lost in thoughts on the plane, taking in all the new things that had happened, contemplating Henry and their situationship, navigating all the new feelings that were bubbling up within his chest.

He was thinking about Henry, who had become such a good friend to Alex in such a short amount of time, who listens to him, supports him, reassures him while having his own demons to deal with, his closetedness, unsympathetic grandparent. I'm sure Alex felt heard, connected, loved and at the same time feeling a new sense of responsibility towards Henry, to care for him, to protect him. He was falling so fast in love with Henry. This must have been overwhelming to him in the best possible way. And you can see it in the way he goes from pensive to taking in a deep breath. I love how it shows that he is relaxing and coming to terms with all these new feelings.

And he tears up a bit at the weight of them, the weight of all the good things, the prospect of something much bigger and more beautiful than a hook up. And he smiles, ever so softly, at how happy and at peace it made him feel.

I cropped the photo so that his teary eyes can be seen a little better. This 9 second scene is so important and sets the tone for the rest of the movie. Alex was clearly very serious after this about their relationship. His transition from showing just pure Physical want and devouring looks (at the polo match), and then just having a good time with Henry, discovering little things about each other (garden scene and Paris Cafe scene) to Paris hotel scene where they make love for the first time and him pouring his heart out to Henry, and seeing Henry say all the right things, respond in the most loving way, has been done so seamlessly and all of it culminate in this plane scene. And it's so apparent that Alex is grasping and accepting all of that. It's just amazing to see Taylor portray this with just facial expressions (and not through a convo with a friend like it's sometimes done in movies). Such a well scripted and well acted scene, it was so refreshing to watch 🥰

[adelrambles]

Tips on Writing Bishop

I've been asked a couple times for advice on how to write a good (03-style) Bishop, and I'm well-aware he can be a bit tough to get a grasp on. As someone who's studied him specifically to learn how to write him as accurately as possible, I figured I'd compile some thoughts in case it'd be helpful to anyone else. I know a lot of Rise takes on him are basing off the 03 version, so maybe this could help generate ideas, too. SO!

Big Overall Points!

At the core of EVERYTHING Bishop does are two primary motivations. The first: the protection of the earth. What this means to him can get tricky, because it doesn't necessarily mean protecting the people, at least not all of them. But it will be better understood alongside the other:

The second: The protection of his sense of safety. Bishop has been deeply traumatized, and everything he does is born of a want to avoid that pain ever again. In his mind, earth is a safe area, a controllable factor, and anything outside it is a danger that must be eliminated. This is why he will still be willing to put himself and other people on the line in service of this; any sacrifice is worth the greater goal. (It's worth noting, Bishop will claim the first as his motivation freely, but is likely not consciously aware of the second.)

Bishop deals in Big Picture ONLY. Another reason Bishop will willingly throw away anything, including the lives of the people he claims to protect, is that he seems incapable of understanding things on a small, individual basis.

Bishop is a cold personality. He does not have strong displays of emotion. He does emote, but for the most part it's muted, so I recommend using emotional bursts very sparingly. (In my own writing, as an example, I try to limit my use of exclamation marks in his dialogue as much as possible.)

At his core, Bishop is afraid, and his response to fear is aggression. This also makes it particularly difficult to talk him down, if he's put in an emotional state. His response to not being in control is often violent retaliation.

With those basic tenants understood, let's move next to some major personality traits:

Bishop is a controlling personality. This is a direct result of his trauma response. Things that can be controlled are safe, therefore he must control everything. If something cannot be controlled, it's a threat that must be eliminated. If he doesn't know why something happened, he becomes angry (including even when it benefits him.)

Bishop is very low-empathy. When writing him, I try to keep in mind that he cannot put himself in the perspective of others. (Or if he can, he doesn't care to.)

Bishop is a sadist. He gets personal enjoyment from hurting others.

Bishop likes fighting, but only when he's winning. He will quickly leave if he can't see a guaranteed victory.

Bishop is paranoid. This is probably self-evident, but it's the reason he's often so well-prepared even when things don't go to plan.

Bishop genuinely seems to enjoy science. He's shown to be far more lenient with scientist characters than anyone else, and he seems to involve himself in his scientists' projects to a degree. Enough to, at the very least, understand their work. (Given he was the one set to dissect the turtles, it might also be argued he has some medical or biology background, himself.)

Bishop is an opportunist and scavenger. He can roll with failures as long as he can find something to get out of it. If he's presented with an opportunity to stab someone in the back, and he has something to gain? He'll take it without a second thought.

Bishop is deeply self-blind. For all his perceptiveness and strategic prowess, Bishop is not very self-aware in the slightest. He is completely blind to his own hypocrisies, and thoroughly confident in his own righteousness.

Bishop adapts fast. He accepts situations for what they are and acts (Though he may still be angry about them, or what have you.) This is likely a skill developed via longevity; the world around him has changed rapidly, but he doesn't feel out of place at all.

Bishop will take extreme risks and thinks wildly outside the box. Also self-evident, if you're familiar with the plans he enacts throughout the show. He'll put a lot on the line if he thinks the reward is worth enough, and he's willing to go to extreme lengths to get what he wants, even if his plans would be considered crazy by normal standards.

Bishop is persistent. If he wants something, he won't stop until he gets it. If he fails, he'll retreat, make a new plan, and try again. It is very difficult to convince him to back down (and certainly not on moral grounds.)

Habits and triggers I've noted:

Being restrained of any sort puts Bishop in a panic. He is more likely to have an emotional response in these scenarios, and seems to have (an albeit muted) desperation to escape. (See: Leatherhead restraining him in the first encounter; His reaction to being trapped on the surgical table in Head of State.)

When being duplicitous or suppressing a reaction, Bishop will go to adjust his tie. This could possibly be considered his tell.

Bishop seems to have a particular fear of aliens blending in as humans. His slayer project was built around the assumption that this is a common threat. (Worth noting: This makes The Shredder the model of the exact threat Bishop is afraid of. Technically, Bishop himself may also fit the description of a threat shaped like a human.)

Writing considerations:

In 03's narrative, Bishop is EPF and EPF is Bishop. Narratively speaking, any organization Bishop is head of acts as if it is an extension of his will and character.

Bishop is shown to strike fear and/or discomfort into most characters he interacts with. Anything beyond this is an outlier, and will draw a reader's attention.

Dialogue-wise, Bishop is generally succinct and blunt. He does dabble in gloating, though, and especially likes to upset others. If he's given a chance to be mean, he'll usually take it. It can help to consider he has a Mission Mode and a Normal Mode. When it comes to Mission Mode, he gets straight to the point and hates unnecessary talking. Otherwise, he's still not very talkative, but will take the time to make pointed jabs or talk through a plan. A lot of his sense of humor seems to be rooted in how He's Better Than You (And You're Going To Die Painfully.)

It's a common pitfall that Bishop is depicted as seeking out the turtles. In 03, once he gets their DNA, he's done with them. Any encounters after that are incidental. Bishop does not care about anything that won't effect his greater goal. If he's targeting another character, it should have to do with a greater plan.

Bishop is an extremely competent combatant, shown to be able to handle up to 7 opponents at once. For a breakdown on his fighting style check out my other post on that!

Bishop is hard to kill, and oftentimes he accidentally contributes to his own defeat. (The hook from Bishop's Gambit is an example I get a LOT of mileage out of, as a perfect symbol of his self-defeating prophecies.)

We almost only ever see Bishop in the context of his work. While it could be construed that he depersonalizes himself, it's much more clear that the narrative depersonalizes him. As far as we, the audience know, Bishop's work is all that he is.

It's unclear if Bishop was released from his abduction or escaped. Depending on which you ascribe to, this can have ramifications for his mindset on how to deal with the alien threat. (Personally, because so much of his inability to cope hinges on a feeling of helplessness, I believe he was released. If he escaped on his own power, that undercuts it, somewhat.)

Thematically-speaking, Bishop parallels both his own torturers and his own victims at the same time. He has perpetuated the cycle that traumatized him in the first place by trying to fight fire with fire. (In that vein, I don't think he's capable of understanding that, not seeing aliens as people in the first place, just dangers. Considering how deeply ingrained his trauma is in his worldview and actions, it would probably ruin him, if he were ever able to actually grasp it.)

Bishop and EPF are likely a commentary on the military of the time 03 was coming out. This can be something worth keeping in mind, when figuring out his greater themes in your story, though it can just as well be discarded if it doesn't fit.

Adding to that, Bishop has an extensive american military background. His skills and knowledge will reflect that.

Bishop also plays on and references a number of real-life alien conspiracies. It can be worth digging through conspiracy history to drum up ideas and themes, too.

The ethical and philosophical quandaries of Bishop's body-hopping and humanity tend to not hold too much weight, because Bishop, himself, doesn't seem to care.

If I think of more I'll certainly be adding on to the reblogs of this post! Or, if you have more thoughts, please feel free to add! If you're in the mood for more Bishop ramblings, that's practically most of this blog atm, but this post is a particular favorite. If you're interested in Fast Forward!Bishop, specifically, consider this post! (also read Taking Pawns. slipped in that self-promo, nice.)

[wilhelmsbee]

The never ending battle (being with Simon vs not being with Simon)

[ghostlyheart]

as we approach the start of a new semester i'm sending all the compassion and empathy in the world to students who struggle with procrastination and what I affectionately like to call the Shame Monster that goes along with it. it sucks to always be treading water and feeling like a fraud to yourself and others, especially when it's something you truly care about. if you're always thinking "why can everyone else be responsible and organized but not me," your brain is overgeneralizing. you're not the only person to experience being overwhelmed and stuck. and even IF everyone else balanced their life perfectly, that wouldn't make you a bad person for struggling. if you care about something but keep avoiding it and don't understand why, there is probably more going than you realize. if your physical and mental health are being neglected, then you're never going to be able to accomplish what you want to do because you don't have any gas in the tank. it took me crashing and failing last semester for me to finally admit to myself that i was suffering from some SERIOUS burnout. i had this whole plan for research i was going to do over the summer and all these opportunities i wanted to take advantage of that i couldn't do because i was neglecting to take care of myself. the worst thing my anxious brain told me could ever happen did happen and i'm still alive. i hope that doesn't happen to you, but know you can recover and come back better. also: it's okay to stop wanting what you thought you wanted, or to take a different path than the one you were "supposed" to. don't do things because you think other people expect you to, or because you think it's too late to change your mind. that isn't sustainable. your college experience is for YOU, not for other people. you can do this!

[ender--slime]

i would like to. write an essay of sorts about how people in fandom tend to treat fictional characters of the work with more humanity than they treat the other members of the fandom. callout posts are ofc a big factor of this but generally i want to analyze the patterns that come out of extreme death of the author, harassment towards specific groups or a specific person, and ofc parasocial behavior towards both big fandom names and small fandom strangers. and the way it all shapes the state of a fandom

[mirrortouchedsea]

(CW for Suicidal Ideation)

Hinata’s breath was heavy as he landed the final move of their act. The tinny music playing from their speakers went quiet and the audience clapped politely. It was always the same song and dance as the crowd moved on with their day. A few of them tossed some yen their way but otherwise it was time for them to regroup for their next performance. Yuta knelt down by the hat with some coins and bills sticking out of it, counting their earnings thus far. 

“Hey aniki! We might be able to eat well tonight! There’s like 3,000 yen in here!” Yuta exclaimed. The idea of a filling dinner made Hinata’s mouth water. Oh what he wouldn’t do for even warm noodles not from a cup. 

Hinata turned to grab the iPod from its place on the speaker, choosing the next song to play. He put the phone back and turned the volume up a little more to play over the evening rush. The music started and he and Yuta moved in unison around their little stage, taking in the crowd. There were some regulars that Hinata recognized, the businesswoman who was perpetually tired but always stopped for their performances and a few kids who looked up at them in awe as their parents were trying to usher them away. There were always new faces too, of course people traveled across the country all the time or took new trains or moved cities, but there was something different about the boy with the bright red hair at the back of the crowd. His sky blue eyes pierced straight through to Hinata’s heart and made him stumble when their gaze connected with his own. 

“Hey, aniki focus! We’re almost done, don't fail on me now!” Yuta whispered, carefully shielding Hinata from the crowd as he regained his footing. Yuta was always so quick thinking. Hinata got back to his position and finished up the routine, eyes looking for that boy he had spotted earlier. He half hoped the boy would come talk to them afterwards while they were packing up for the evening, but when he finally saw that shock of red hair, it was moving away with the rest of the crowd. 

Hinata sighed, disappointed. Maybe that boy would come back someday. There was something about him that drew Hinata in. 

Someone bumped his shoulder, drawing him from his thoughts. “Hey, aniki, are you alright? You seem out of it today.” Yuta’s hand rested on his shoulder and Hinata couldn’t help but smile. Wasn’t it supposed to be the other way around, the older brother checking in on the younger one? 

“Hey hey everything’s fine Yuta-kun, don’t worry about me. I was just thinking about that delicious dinner you’re treating us too~” He playfully pushed back on Yuta, the red haired blue eyed boy all but forgotten now. 

“Hey! It’s technically our money so I’m not treating you to anything!” Yuta scowled but the smile in his voice was obvious to Hinata. 

“Hehe, then dinner’s on me! Say ‘thank you aniki!’” 

--- 

It was a week before Hinata saw the red headed boy in their audience again. He had all but slipped his mind, but those striking blue eyes were impossible to forget. Yuta was introducing their next performance which allowed Hinata to take a better look at the older boy who had made his way to the middle of the audience. He was tall and what Hinata could see of his outfit seemed ill-fitting at best, along with a headband holding his hair away from his eyes. 

Hinata scrambled to his position as the music queued up and let his instincts take over. Every so often he found himself glancing at the red haired boy, trying to see what he thought of their performance, but his face revealed nothing. 

Why was he so focused on this one boy? It’s not like they didn’t have strangers who watched them sometimes, and none of them had caught Hinata’s attention quite like this boy. He really couldn’t be much older than Hinata, maybe 17 at the oldest. Was he an older brother too? The boy’s eyes made contact with Hinata’s and it took everything in him to not look away. 

Once again however, Yuta snapped him out of whatever trance he had been in and everything was forgotten. 

“Are you really okay aniki? You’ve been out of it a lot recently…” Oh how it pained Hinata to see the concern on Yuta’s face. Nothing was even really wrong per se, but Hinata was distracted nonetheless. 

“I’m fine, Yuta-kun. Geez, can’t your older brother have some peace?” His mouth ran faster than his brain and he immediately regretted it. Yuta’s face flipped through several emotions; hurt, confusion, exhaustion. It wasn’t like him to hide things from his brother, so why was he doing it now? “Whatever, let’s get some dinner. My treat~” 

“It’s our money!” 

--- 

The boy continued to make appearances at the twins’ performances on the street, becoming something of a regular but disappearing before Hinata could flag him down. Hinata wasn’t even sure what compelled him to want to talk to the older boy, but he wanted to say something. He had even noticed that the boy seemed happier and his clothes fit a little better, not like they were just the first thing he grabbed out of a donation pile. 

Finally, after almost a month of trying to say something to the boy, Hinata saw him walk up to their hat on the ground and drop a few coins into it. 

“Thank you!” He said, walking up to the boy. “Hope you enjoyed the performance!” 

The boy froze as if he wasn’t expecting to be greeted like that. There was a slight flush to his face. “I-it’s nothing, don’t worry about it. You uh…you were great?” The boy seemed unsure of how to reply, though Hinata was happy with the compliment nonetheless. Maybe… 

“What brings you here? I mean--agh, sorry! I just mean…I noticed you don’t have a regular schedule?” The words were practically falling out of his mouth and Hinata wasn’t really sure what they were doing. “Like you show up a few days in a row but then go three weeks without stopping by at all!” He was just digging a bigger grave for himself! Great! 

“Ah uhm…I’m not from around here.” The boy scratched at the back of his neck. Maybe Hinata should back off. 

“O-oh, yeah of course. Duh. Are you visiting family or something?” 

“Not quite. I really should get going though. See you…later?” 

“Yeah, see you later.” 

“Hey Aniki, are you coming or not? The food’s gonna get cold!” 

“Coming!” 

---

It was almost a month before the boy appeared again. In the time between, Hinata had come up with a million different ideas for what his life was like. Was he a delinquent who skipped school to hang out on the street with gangs (how scary! But he looked strong enough to fit in)? Or was he a runaway from a city far away, somewhere Hinata only dreamed of visiting like Okinawa? Maybe he had a bad relationship with his dad and ran away, a thought that Hinata hated to admit had crossed his mind more than once. Or maybe he just passed through the city on the way to somewhere else. That seemed to be the most likely option, especially if he couldn’t come very often. 

When the boy did finally show up again, Hinata had to hold himself back from practically jumping him after the performance. Something looked…different about him though. His eyes seemed more tired? Like he hadn’t been sleeping well. Hinata thought of a fight he had with his dad a few weeks ago that made it hard for him to sleep and thought maybe this boy was the same as him in that regard. 

Hinata decided to wave him down after the performance, hat in hand (they had done pretty well! It felt heavier than normal and even without counting everything, they’d probably have enough for breakfast too). 

“Hey! You look tired, are you--did you want to get something to eat?” Please say yes please say yes please say yes--

The boy’s mouth opened, then closed, then opened again. Did Hinata mess up? Oh he overstepped and now there really wasn’t any chance of getting to know him. Why was he so interested in talking to the boy anyway? Hinata had been asking himself that for a while now and he still had no answer. 

“I…I can’t. I need to go.” The boy turned and ran off before Hinata could ask more. He just kept messing up, didn’t he? Maybe he really was just a burden to Yuta and their dad and the restaurant owner. He shouldn’t have been born and Yuta would’ve been better off--

“Aniki! Sheesh, get your head out of the clouds. How much did we make?” Yuta grabbed the hat out of Hinata’s hand and quickly counted out the coins and bills. “Woah! We could eat a whole five course meal with this…” 

“Think with your head a little Yuta-kun. We’ve got breakfast paid for if we don’t blow it all tonight!” 

Yuta nodded before handing the hat back to Hinata. “So, my pick tonight?” 

--- 

Hinata signed the note, trying his best to keep the tears from dripping on it and smudging the ink. After his blunder with the red haired boy, he hadn’t shown up to their performances for over two months. Hinata was certain that he had messed up and was too forward. He didn’t even know the kid’s name! Why did he think the two of them could ever be friends? 

And on top of all of that, Yuta had become more and more distant from Hinata, as if Hinata just existing was dragging him back from his full potential. Yuta would have been better off as an only child and maybe Hinata deserved this life. Thirteen years living with their father, who had treated them as nothing but monsters, blaming them for their mother’s death and everything bad that had happened since, Hinata had resolved to run away. He’d make his way to the mountains and maybe he’d find someone willing to help him or maybe he’d slip into an endless sleep. 

Dear Yuta-kun, the letter had started. I’m sorry that I’m leaving like this, but I know that I’m just a burden to you. I’m sorry for that. I wish I had more to say but I just want you to be happy and maybe father will treat you better without me. I love you. 

The other letter, already folded and placed on the table, was much shorter, addressed to his father. 

Dear Father, I’m sorry I couldn’t be a better son. Please don’t take this out on Yuta-kun, it was my decision. 

The less words he spent on that man, the better. Hinata folded Yuta’s note and placed it on top before quietly exiting through the front door. 

---

Everything was cold. Hinata slumped against a tree, head between his knees in a last ditch effort to keep warm. Sleep should come soon and he could painlessly move on, at least that’s what he hoped. He barely registered someone approaching him, but didn’t look up. 

“Hey.” The voice was vaguely familiar, but where did he remember it from? A warm hand shook at Hinata’s shoulder. 

“‘M fine.” The words were barely a whisper. The other voice grunted before walking away. It was another minute before Hinata felt something drape around his shoulders and a cup shoved in his hand. Whatever was in it was steaming, warming his fingers. 

“Drink.” The voice said. And he did, the tea was very, very bitter. That voice… 

Hinata looked up, meeting a pair of bright, sky blue eyes. That’s where he recognized the voice from. Did he…live? In the mountains? The boy seemed to recognize him too. He was wearing a headband and what looked like very warm clothes that Hinata wished he had. Hinata finished the tea, trying not to focus on the flavor. It helped at least, in warming him up a bit. 

“Why are you here?” The boy finally spoke again. It sounded like he was unsure if he should be mad or concerned, or both, but he offered Hinata another cup of tea, which he accepted if only to warm his fingers up. He pulled the blanket closer around his body. 

“I…ran away.” Hinata looked downward, as if admitting this out loud was a cardinal sin. The boy gestured for him to continue. “I guess I just…I was dragging my brother down. I’m not really talented at anything like he is and I’m the reason our dad sees us as monsters. He shouldn’t have to deal with a brother like me.” Hinata wasn’t really sure why he was spilling this so easily. The boy was a good listener though, hanging on every word Hinata spoke. Was he shaking? He’d never admitted this out loud before and it felt oddly freeing to say it to someone. 

He waited for a response, anything to chase away the uncomfortable silence Hinata had created with his confession. He really fucked up, didn’t he. He should have just kept that to himself like he always did instead of burdening a stranger like this! 

“I…” The boy started, barely audible above Hinata’s racing heartbeat. “I’m glad you’re alive.” He sounded unsure of his words. Was he just trying to be nice? Of course he was, how else do you respond to a kid telling you something like this? 

“You don’t have to pretend.” 

“I’m not. When I saw you singing and dancing…I think I realized something--” The boy cut himself off, the suddenness of it making Hinata look up. A moment later he heard his brother calling out from the woods behind him. 

“Aniki! There you are!” Yuta tackled him to the ground, squeezing Hinata like he might just blow away in the wind if they weren’t careful. “You scared me! I can’t believe you’d do something like that!” 

Tears pricked at Hinata’s eyes again. “I’m sorry, Yuta-kun. I’m really sorry.” He buried his face in Yuta’s jacket. His nose started to run, from the cold or the tears he couldn’t tell. 

“You aren’t a burden to me. I don’t know what I’d do without you around Aniki!” Yuta pulled back, hands gripping Hinata’s shoulders. “Promise you won’t do something that stupid again.” 

Hinata wiped the tears from his eyes, sparing a glance where the boy had been. It was as if he had never been there at all and Hinata had just hallucinated the whole interaction. He looked back at his twin brother. “I promise.” 

“Now let's get you home and warmed up. Where’d you get this blanket anyway? It doesn’t look like one of ours.” 

“I…” The boy had been real, and he told Hinata he was glad he was alive (even if his explanation was cut short by Hinata’s brother rushing in). “I guess I just found it. There must be people living nearby or something.” 

--- 

The chatter of the night club died down for the night as everyone was getting ready to go home. Hinata’s feet were sore from running around, but it was satisfying to be back in a restaurant like this. It reminded him of his childhood working for the Chinese restaurant with Yuta. 

Rinne, the leader of Crazy:B who had wanted to get closer to Hinata, and by extension 2wink, slid a drink down the bar. It looked like a horrible mix of syrups and club soda, but one sip was all it took for Hinata to drink it all down. 

“Great job tonight Hina! You’re a real natural at this stuff.” Rinne was washing the other glasses behind the bar now as Hinata finished the rest of his soda. 

“Yuta-kun and I used to work in a restaurant so it comes pretty naturally to us!” 

“That so?” 

“Mhm!” Hinata slid the empty glass back to Rinne, who quickly dumped the ice and washed it before tossing the towel over his shoulder. The entire week they’d been working the club together, there had been something bugging Hinata at the back of his mind. “Hey, Rinne-senpai…did you ever watch our shows?” 

“Huh? ‘Course I have, vice prez wants us to work together so I’ve seen a few of ‘em.” 

“That’s not what I mean. I mean like…back when Yuta-kun and I did street performances.” 

Rinne paused for a moment. “Why’re you askin’?” 

“Oh, it’s nothing. You just reminded me of someone who used to watch them.” 

“Well I’m sure whoever it was is proud to see you singin’ and dancin’ on stage.” Rinne had come around the bar and stood next to Hinata, ruffling his hair. “Let’s get goin’ or I’m never gonna hear the end of it from Niki-kun.” 

[kvvkee]

fma manga page redraw by yours truly :) edward is such a little diva i adore him

[outfoxt]

me staring at my own reflection: hey ferb! I know what we're gonna do this weekend!

[velvetjune]

i played the remastered alan wake a while back and am replaying the original on steam, and, honestly, they’re so similar, I couldn’t tell which is which if you held up comparisons. ive come across reviews about the game looking outdated and bad (mostly compared to other releases in that time), but the original looks great and I like the hazy dark lighting for both this and awan

[cr1ms0n4nd-ac3]

Hello Hello and greetings my friendzies!!

Welcome to my very long post of my new and ever Sleep Token predictions!

Where this post can tell either each of them that may or may not happen before Europe-UK tours, during Europe-UK tours or after the tour is done! Or whatever, could be anything!!

And just to let you know, none of my predictions will ever come true for the ST fandom.

But if it did come true, nor some predictions did managed to finally make it come true- then I suppose I consider this a win—! :D

Now let's get this started!!

New predictions start here!

↓

Okay, let us predict of what new songs are gonna be in the setlist, but I'm not just gonna simply guess in simple words.. I'm gonna guess the new songs in the setlist with my new light color concept!

And some songs too that will soon return! But with new extra light color? Who knows!

Let's find out!

New Song Predictions:

The Apparition -

By in very popular demand, it seems that ST fans wanted the song The Apparition to be in the setlist. But if it's in the setlist..

What will the light color be?

To me, at the beginning of the song. It starts off with simple white light color. While it goes up.. the particle lights being light-greyish. Until it fades as the white color turns to red. And the particles turn from light-greyish to white and red at the same time! And when the "Why are you NEEEEEVVVERR REAAALLLL!?!" happens. Red, Yellow and White lights and White particles shine shine!! And then it slowly makes it to Red at the end of the song..

Cool right?

Are you really Okay?

I'm not sure if this is really by popular demand, but all of us will be very emotional about this song in the setlist lmao- Espera Vocals too!

Now, for AYRO..

The beginning of the song having this yellow-whiteish color. Then the lazer lights show up as white color once again. But when things pick up the pace.. White color and Blue lights! And then the end finally became light-orange-ish white for the "Please don't hurt yourself again". Yeah, you're welcome for being emotionally destroyed-

- Distraction.

Distraction... Oh do I want Distraction to be in the setlist. Yes I do!

And I know just the light color concept to be if it's really on the setlist!

The beginning having the cyan color, while it turns into blue but still repeats the pattern! However, the white light particles are shown too and the lazer lights becoming indigo! But as the part "It's too late for me" happened, it turned into Red at first. But it soon slowly fades to Blue, foreshadowing Descending/the person's descend. The repeat part of "its too late for me" repeatedly turns from Red to Blue, and at the end.. it turned into Blue instead.

And for bonus, Espera Vocals! :))

Descending -

I think we all know that we want Descending to be in the setlist.. so what will the light color be?

During the Beginning, the lights becoming very blue, symbolising its descending deeper into the ocean. And then the light particle and lazer lights had the purple color. It went being the same until the lazer lights turned to cyan. And the end? Lazer lights turn cyan while the particle became red.

Representing that we had finally descended.. down deeper and ever.

Telomeres -

I feel like the song Telomeres having the vibe of blue(beginning), cyan(middle part) and indigo(IV's solo and at the end) will bring me into tears of joy- Because yeah.

TPWBYT is the Ocean/Depression Album after all. Also Espera vocals go yummy YUMMY!!

High Water -

A very very blue and indigo vibe lights here, and then it turns to pink at tge end, by foreshadowing the next last song for Missing Limbs!

The last song's light colors are really beautiful tho..

Drag Me Under -

Green and White lights for the song that first emotionally destroy me. ESPECIALLY THE ESPERA VOCALS AUGHHHHHHHHH...!! <:(((

I remember I watched that live version video on Youtube. And I thought having the color of Green and White will suit this! Also the lazer lights being Red for the near-end! :)

Gods -

This is also by popular demand, so here is my light color concept on this!

Red lights and White/Red particle lights/lazer lights. And I believe that this is gonna be foreshadowing the third last part for TMBTE, and this is what I LIKE TO SEE!!

Give -

Pink lights and Purple spotlights and light particle, the Falsetto vocals for Vessel will so ascend us fr-

Take Aim -

I'm so not ready if this song is gonna be in the setlist, ONE EMOTIONAL THERAPY FOR US HEHE, Now to me for the light color concept..

White(beginning and end, and also the lazer lights, light particles and spotlights having the same color-) Blue(middle part) and Red(near end) colors represents Happiness disguising itself as Hate/Toxicity. Which is why I would love to see this song at Live. What do you all think?

And for the bonus... Calcutta!

Orange at the beginning, the lazer lights appeared as light orange, then the solo part turns to orange yet again before it became Light Orange at the end! With light particles becoming blue..! Hehe,,

Alright! The first part is done, now it's time for the second part..

Songs that'll return again with extra new ones!

But as I said before, I am still gonna guess the new light color concepts. So I hope you're ready for this!

Aqua Regia -

Same purple and white lights! We already seen some live videos about it, so I think it'll be the same!

Vore -

Same green color too! Again, we do see it in live. So I think it'll remain the same.

The Love You Want -

Again, same pink lights and we did see it in live videos! But since Euclid already had the pink color, I think TLYW will have the new light color for purple(beginning), orange(near-end) and blue(end!) Who knows, we'll had to find out!

Fall For Me -

Oh god... That song broke us, and if this song is gonna return. I know just a concept for this:

At first, the beginning having the white color. But when the part "OH GOD I WISH YOU WERE HERE!!!" happens, it slowly turns from white to indigo-blue.. and that's pretty much it-

Mine -

I feel like any of you must have miss this one, I think they'll go off for the blue(beginning), cyan(middle part), and indigo(end)colors while the light particle or lazer lights were white! I really hope this will make a return..

Bloodsport. -

Honestly, we see this at live videos. So I know damn well they're going for the red color lights. The song still brokes me when I cover it with my flute- 🥲

Sugar -

Pink, Red and Blue lights. That's all I can say for this.. And since it is also in popular demand lmao- XDD

And for the bonus.. Nazareth!

Same colors honestly! I think maybe you all will have an light color concept u like to tell me! I hope to hear this again someday!! ^^

Next up, Events!

Events from Europe-UK tours and something else new may or may not happen anytime soon,

So here is mine!

While you reblog to add yours too!

1. The Summoning Shenanigans becoming even more unhinged and more worser than the US tours:

More Chaos? Equals Worse Chaos?Sure! This is getting even more worser than the US tours anyway because we all had a bad but good feeling about this lmao— Just imagine Vessel wanting to play with the new mic once more, which makes III so pissed off! And I think Vessel will pretty much bother IV next in more chaotic and worse ways lol- XDD

2. More Appreciation!

New audience? Equals more appreciation! As long as they don't go too energetic or too wild..

3. New looks? HELL YEAH?!?

Honestly, I don't think we'll get new looks for each band members.. but I think we'll had to see new subtle changes! In either IV, Espera, Vessel or III! We'll had to see then. Also, IV and III having new outfits... the two either bought it for themselves or just got it for no reason- The edits and the aura is gonna be so fire if this really happens!! AAAAA I WANT TO DREAM THIS!! ✨✨

4. Vessel and IV's voice improving.

Imagine the screaming vocals for the two, the growl vocals for the two, even the falsetto vocals for VESSEL.. Damn well I know I want them to take care of themselves.. so I think their voices will improve so much if they really did it! No wonder why all of us wanted a live album- me too! I would listen to it all day like Ghost's RITEHERERIGHTNOW live album. xD

5. New hats?? New outfits?? New sense of style!!

I'm pretty sure I'd seen some posts of them will be getting new hats soon.. I think the same in my opinion! I feel like now I want III to wear wolf ears and II wearing dog ears hehe- oh and the outfits, the new style?? OML I CAN FEEL THE GREATNESS FOR THE BOYS!!! :DD

6. Will Vessel finally talk? Yes, No, Maybe, or probably?

I'm pretty sure I made a post about my dream prediction last night.. honestly, I don't think we'll be seeing him talk again since we last saw him talk.

But imagine the courage he gets, to thank us for the genuine respect and support for what we had shown him! THAT will be sadly emotional for us.

6. III talk in 2024!

More III talk, MORE LOUDNESS!! It'll probably never happen tbh..

7. The Offering Zoomies be like "BARK BARK!!!!"-

Probably we'll see more offering zoomie moments.. specifically the "TAKE A BITE!!!" part at the near end- bro sounds like an aggressive dog too!

8. New pictures from ADAM!!

Oh boy, I can tell the pictures are gonna be awesome as hell!! I mean, the high quality is sooo fitting like- ✌️✌️

9. Lore implication from the other new interludes? Y not?

I mean, surely the new interludes had some different meaning. But if we get the other new interludes WHICH HAS NEW LORE..

It's detective time folks!

10. Either someone in the ST band gave an emotional speech, or idk.... But that will be a great change of pace.

11. New live light colors!! In probably each song or songs that'll return, I already typed a lot from my new songs prediction so y not!!!

12. We are gonna have a Sleep Token ARG if there is some cryptic stuff happening, and it's up to us to solve it!

Done, and also-!

13. NEW LIVE ALBUM, NEW SONG, NEW EP, NEW COVER OR WHATEVER.. GIVE US SOME NEW CONTENT ALREADY RAHHHHHHHH

14. The lights having new details! I really wanna see how this turn out!!

Bonus: A Sleep Token ARG is about to happen soon. ( I am INTENSE as hell rn. )

Okay, in my honesty and my..not-so great predictions inside my head.

I had a very very VERY VERY VERY SO VERY intense feeling that as soon as the Europe-UK tour ends. I feel like we are about to see an ARG happening very soon, so you must know this.

I remember I've seen some 1 year ago posts of anyone trying to find out the Rune Words when TMBTE covers were teased before the official release. It went well but honestly, this year of 2024 tho. Another ARG is gonna happen and I can feel it.

Imagine the teasers, the cryptic posts, the new puzzles, and even cryptic messages on each posts or..whatever! It's gonna be like the TØP lore ARG but THINGS ARE GETTING EVEN MORE CRAZIER!!

And I know it may not happen soon, but still...I can feel it, and i'm getting more tenser than ever...

—

...AND, it seems you had made it to the end! :DD

My god it took like.. not one, but 10 HOURS to type all of it. All because of school, all because of loss of motivation and energy, all because of slight burnouts BUT I DID IT! HAHA LET'S GOOOO!!

And I swear, if some of my predictions were right.. tag me and remind me right now, and I am gonna squeal in happiness.

That is all.

Have a great day/night. ^^

[cherry-bomb-ships]

When I finally start making youtube videos its over for you bitches