#so I finally finished putting in the images and mustered up the courage to post it

[legendoftherisingtide]

[intro]

Bakugou is a prideful, arrogant person. He holds himself to the highest standard; he is the best and everyone else is simply below him. Everything he has ever done was in pursuit of being number one, shining above the rest. He has to have a perfect victory, he has to be a perfect student, he has to win to save.

He pushes and pushes and won’t let anyone see his weaknesses or his insecurities. He can never lose, he can never fail, he can never show that he regrets or hesitates or that he hasn’t thought everything through. He must never be vulnerable in every sense of the word.

Then why is he standing in the rain.

To apologize shouldn’t be a sacrifice, but it is for Bakugou. To pour his feelings, to admit his wrong, to let down all of the walls he has built and be vulnerable. And in front of his whole class.

He is willing to sacrifice his pride, to fully sacrifice any superiority he could have, to bare his soul and even risk rejection. Because he knows Midoriya is more important. Because he wants him to come home, he wants him to know his true feelings, because he wants things to change. 

Because Midoriya has changed him. Midoriya has opened his eyes; by showing him he’s allowed to be open, that his feelings should be expressed, that he has so much to learn, and so much of that was learned through Midoriya just existing.

He isn’t sacrificing his safety frivolously because he’s expected to as a hero; he is doing it because he has grown. He is doing it because he has finally admitted to himself that he wants Midoriya to be with him and safe.

So I will sacrifice this for you. Not because it will change anything, as much as I want that I know that I can’t just fix all the wrong with just this. And I am willing to do as much as it takes to earn your forgiveness. But I don’t need that from you, not now and not ever if you don’t want that, I just need you to rest. I did so much wrong. And I am sorry for everything. You don’t have to do this alone. Lean on us. You are so strong and being supported doesn’t discount that. You’ve taught me that. 

I hate the rain. But I will brave it for you. 

He would do everything in his power, admit so many things, just to get Midoriya to take care of himself. We see him being the most vulnerable he has ever been in front of people that aren’t Midoriya. He does so much completely out of character, all in pursuit of being there for Midoriya. 

For Izuku.

He finally gets over himself and finally tells Midoriya the feelings he has felt for so long.

He lets go of this idea he is inherently better and finally acknowledges that his hatred for Midoriya has always been about his own shortcomings and insecurities. But he still wants to be better, they are still rivals. He isn’t going to sacrifice that part of him because that is just who he is; he is still going to push to number one.

But now it’s different.

There is verbal and vocal acceptance and respect. Before it was unspoken; their relationship had changed ever since Ground Beta. They were proper rivals, with mutual respect and care, they were actively making each other better.

But Bakugo finally verbalizes it and tells Midoriya, not only is he sorry, but he wants to actually have a proper friendship; he wants to continue to become better and earn his forgiveness. He wants them to push each other to be better, he wants to continue to fight for the top spot, he still wants to be the best.

But when did it become something else? 

When was the turning point when it started to shift from wanting to surpass Midoriya and be the best, to wanting to keep up with Midoriya and stay by his side?

Bakugou has already sacrificed himself for Midoriya before. His body moved on its own; with no hesitation, he would save Midoriya. He has already risked his life for him. But there is a layer to it that I don’t think people talk about. 

He tells Midoriya he shouldn’t try to win this on his own. 

He disguises his concern with an insistence that he’s in it to fight for himself when he initially joins the battle. But it is to fight by Midoriya’s side and support him.

But taking the hit for Midoriya, jumping in the way isn’t just support. This is sacrifice. This is giving yourself to ensure the safety of someone. And it was second nature. 

There are two reasons and both are a sacrifice of something in the moment.

It is knowing someone is so valuable, so great, in all senses of the word, that they must be protected. Bakugou is sacrificing his body and admitting that Midoriya needs to stay alive, for personal reasons and/or for the world. He needs Midoriya to be okay, Midoriya can’t fight alone and Bakugou will do anything to make sure he will be okay. 

But the sacrifice of ideology. 

With every development, he has relinquished parts of himself. When he sacrifices himself he is not only sacrificing his body but is admitting that he can’t do this on his own; he needs Midoriya too. This isn’t him wanting to be better than Midoriya, it’s him wanting to do it together.

Midoriya changed him.

He doesn’t die for Midoriya. He wakes up and just as his last thought was Midoriya, so was his first as he woke up. He runs to his side. People are dragging him back, trying to have him rest, knowing before he even said anything that he would lose his mind over Midoriya’s situation. 

Everyone sees how Bakugou feels about Midoriya.

He sacrifices himself because Midoriya can not die on him. Midoriya has to stay alive. Midoriya has to keep fighting. 

There can not be a world that doesn’t have him in it.

This is the culmination of what has been developing ever since the final exam where Bakugou finally works with Midoriya; the day that win to save, save to win was noticed. Then furthered after Ground Beta where they finally talked to each other and something changed within them both.

But the final sacrifice is the culmination of Bakugou’s character.

He knows what this decision will mean. Everyone screams for him not to. He knows that he is going to die. He knows he will not win this fight.

This isn’t dying for the cause. This isn’t just a hero complex. This is because he can help Midoriya and he will. This is for Izuku.

I will sacrifice myself for you. To give you more time, to give you even the slightest chance of winning. I will sacrifice myself for you because you are who can win. I am going to die. I am going to die and in my final thoughts, I will ask if I will still be able to be by your side.

It is no longer can I beat you. It is no longer can I surpass you. It is can I still catch up to you. It is can I still even be equal to you. He has already sacrificed the idea that he could beat Midoriya, that isn’t what he wants anymore. What he wants is to stay here with him.

I will sacrifice everything I am. I have wanted to be the best. All my life I have wanted to surpass you and everyone around me. But you. I will let that go for you. I let it go in my mind for so long now and I have never wanted to admit it. Is it even possible? Is it even possible for me to catch up to you? Is it even possible for me to stay by your side. I can’t be that anymore. I am sacrificing even that now. I will never be number one now. I will never become the person I always dreamed to be. I will never surpass you. I am forever sacrificing that now. I will die here.  

But can I still be with you?

The sacrifice of his life is him fully relinquishing everything he is, admitting that he can’t keep up, losing all of the progress he has made, letting go of everything that made up his character.

And the last thing on his mind is if he can still be able to be by Midoriya’s side.

He won’t let him go again. 

[watchmegetobsessed]

WILDEST FANTASIES (part 7)

⚫️A/N: SURPRISE!!! i originally wanted to wait a bit more before posting this but im impatient and want to wipe the disappointment in myself for deleting part 6 lol and now that im mentioning it, it would mean a lot if yall could revisit the prev part and engage with it bc i was a dumb moron and deleted the original post at almost 500 notes🥺 so that would mean a lot. but anyways, here is the next part, enjoy!

⚫️PAIRING: Professor!Harry X Reader

⚫️WARNING: sexual content

⚫️WORD COUNT: 5.5k

SERIES MASTERPOST

The food is as amazing as the man that made it. He even lights a candle for dinner and it’s truly the most relaxing time you’ve had in probably… forever. Harry is as smart as you always thought him to be, but not the kind to rub it into your face. He also seems to be mesmerized by the fact that you study math and he keeps asking you questions about why you chose it and what your favorite thing about it is.

“You made a mistake with making me dinner,” you sigh, when you’ve licked your plate completely clean.

“And why is that?” he laughs.

“Because it was good and now I want you to cook for me all the time.”

“Oh, so you want me to be your personal chef?”

“Yeah, definitely.”

“Alright, I’m fine with that. But that would mean spending more time with me,” he says with a coy smile before drinking up the rest of his wine.

“That sounds terrible!” you roll your eyes dramatically.

Standing up from your seat you walk over to him and as if he was reading in your mind, he pushes himself away from the table enough so you can sit on his lap. His arms lock around you and you take his face in your hands before kissing him.

“I’ve had my appetizer and dinner was amazing, now it’s time for dessert, don’t you think?” you murmur against his lips and you can already feel him growing harder underneath you.

“Excellent idea, Miss Y/L/N,” he smirks before standing up, with you in his arms and you gasp, holding onto his neck while he carries you to the bedroom as if you were absolutely lightweight.

He basically throws you to his bed and you can’t help but giggle as you bounce on the comfortable mattress, watching him stand at the end of the bed with such a sexy, sinister smile on his face. It suddenly weighs down on you that you’re actually gonna have sex with him, after fantasizing about it for so fucking long, it’s finally happening.

And you’re more than ready for it.

He takes his shirt off without a word and you finally lay your eyes on his toned, naked chest. You’ve seen part of his tattooed arm, but you had no idea what was underneath his shirts and reality is better than any image you made up in your head.

“Fuck, I can’t believe you were hiding this!” you groan, making him chuckle as he crawls on top of you, his cross pendant dropping to your chest as he kisses you.

“There’s gonna be no hiding tonight,” he groans before grabbing the hem of your shirt and tugging it off of you and suddenly you realize you’re not wearing your lingerie.

“Wait!” you pull back and he looks at you confused. “I need… I need a minute.”

“Okay, is everything alright?” he asks, rolling off of you and he watches you grab your bag from the floor.

“Yeah, just need to do something quickly. Is this your bathroom?” you point at the door and he nods. “I’ll be back in a minute, I promise.”

Practically you tear your clothes off and put on the set so fast you’re out of breath by the time you finish. Quickly fixing your hair you take a deep breath and try to muster up all your courage before opening the door.

Harry is still lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling and when he hears the opening of the door he pushes himself up onto his elbows, but as soon as he sees what you’re wearing, he sits up straight, his greedy eyes raking your body from toe to head.

“And you’ve been hiding this under your clothes?” he asks and you can’t help but laugh. Walking over to the bed you climb to his lap, the touch of his hand on your naked back makes you gasp and you can’t wait to feel it everywhere on your body.

“What would you do if I said I wear this every time I’m in your class?” you tease him.

“Don’t plant the image into my head, I won’t be able to hold the remainder of the classes without a boner.”

Chuckling you just kiss him, your hands exploring his naked torso, loving the way his muscles fit perfectly into your palms. His hungry kisses move down your neck, to your chest, his lips devouring the swell of your breasts, they look exceptionally great in the push up bra so it was at least worth the fortune. Hooking a finger into one of the cups, he drags it down, your breast flowing out of it and he wastes no time to get his mouth all over it, kissing, biting and sucking wherever he can reach. Without even thinking about it, you start grinding your hips against him, feeling his hard cock through the layers that are still separating the two of you.

Harry unhooks your bra so quickly, you barely register it, and then he tears it off of you, baring your whole abdomen in front of his greedy eyes.

“Look at these perky nipples, so hard, all for me?” he asks, palming both your breasts in his hands as your nipples press against his palms.

“Yes,” you whimper, arching your back so you melt into his touch even more. Leaning down he licks and gently bites them both, a moan slipping through your lips at the sensation. Desperate for more friction between your legs, you grind harder and Harry thrusts his hips up to meet your movements, his cock pressing to your cunt perfectly.

Wrapping an arm around you, he turns and pushes you down to the mattress in a heartbeat, kissing you again with so much passion while he gets rid of his pants, now wearing just as much clothing as you are. He returns to your breasts once again, this time sucking on one spot until there’s a mark on you. It won’t be seen in clothes, but it’ll definitely remind you of him every time you see yourself in the mirror before showering.

You’re starting to grow impatient, wanting to feel him inside you as fast as possible and you try to hint it with grinding your hips against his again, but he just pulls back smiling at you smugly.

“Patience, pretty girl. I told you, I want to take my time with you,” he warns you, one hand rubbing your thigh, giving it a squeeze, but you just whine at him.

“But I want you so bad!”

“Begging is appreciated, but you still can’t rush me,” he chuckles, before kissing you again.

He kisses down your neck then, between your breasts and across your stomach, hooking his fingers into the elastic of your underwear, but then as if he changes his mind, he first presses two fingers against your clit through the lacy fabric, making you gasp from the pleasant pressure.

“I’ve been thinking about the taste of you since our time in my office. I need to taste you again,” he growls before finally pulling your last clothing item off of you.

Thinking of the way his mouth felt on you then has been on your mind nonstop and now you’re about to feel it again. He kisses the inside of your thighs, just like he did before, but right when he is about to dive in, a low, annoying buzzing interrupts the moment.

It’s your phone in your bag and you could already kill whoever it is even though you don’t even know just yet.

“Fuck, let me just mute it,” you pant, crawling off the bed to grab it from your bag.

Kostas’ name is shown on the screen and you’re just about to decline the call when you notice you already have a bunch of texts from him, all of them saying the same thing: S.O.S.!

“Damn it, I need to answer, it’s… it’s important,” you tell Harry with an apologetic look and he just nods.

“Sure, don’t worry,” he says, and it’s not the kind of answer when he is just lying to make himself appear better, he truly means it.

“Thank you,” you breathe out before answering the call. “Hey, what’s up?”

“Where the fuck are you? You know what? It doesn’t matter, you need to get home, now!”

“What happened?”

That’s when you hear the deafening crying that’s mixed with screaming. It comes from Ramona and you instantly know something really bad has happened, because the only time you heard her cry like that was when her aunt got into a car accident and she was in a coma. Luckily, Aunt Lydia woke up weeks later, but Ramona was a mess.

“Ramona is about to faint from crying, from what I could understand, they broke up with Dean.”

“What?! Are you kidding?”

“No, so you better get here, because she needs all the support.”

“Fuck, okay… um, I’ll be there soon.”

“Hurry!” he begs before ending the call.

Sighing with closed eyes you genuinely think about being selfish and not going back, but it vanishes fast. You can’t let one of your best friends down when she needs you the most, you just wish it happened some other time. When you dare to look around Harry is already sitting with a knowing smile on his face.

“Go, your friend needs you,” he tells you softly and you’re quick to get on the bed with him, crawling to his lap, hoping he doesn’t hate you entirely now.

“I’m so sorry, I really wish it didn’t happen now, I want to stay so badly!”

“Nothing to be sorry for, okay? I admire how much you care about your friends.”

“But this was supposed to be our time together finally!” you pout at him, part of you hoping he would convince you to stay, though you know he wouldn’t do that.

“We’ll… find another time for us, I promise,” he tells you softly, caressing the side of your cheek until he takes your chin between his fingers, pulling you in for a kiss. “Our foreplay continues,” he adds with a chuckle.

“I’m fucking fed up with the foreplay,” you groan, but then it turns into a laugh. “I should go,” you hum, kissing him again and it starts to go back and forth, kissing each other without making an effort to leave the bed while his hands are raking your naked back.

“Go, because if you stay one more minute, I might tie you to the bed and you won’t leave until tomorrow evening.”

“Is that a threat or a promise, professor?” you smirk at him coyly, but he just smacks your ass, lifting you off of his lap, making you pout at him sadly.

You get dressed and gather your stuff, still so torn about leaving but you know it’s the right thing to do.

“I’ll drive you home,” he tells you when you’re all ready.

“Oh, no need.”

“It wasn’t a question, Y/N. I’m driving you home. It’s dark outside and I don’t want you taking the bus on your own.”

Fuck. He is so hot when he takes control.

So you end up in his car and he gives you a ride home. Your heart skips a beat when you feel his hand on your thigh, making you turn to face him.

“I know you’re thinking how I must be annoyed with you right now.”

“I am,” you nod truthfully.

“I am annoyed, but not with you. Just with the situation. You didn’t have control over it, so don’t beat yourself about it.”

“Stop being so understanding and mature, it makes it even harder,” you groan, but he just laughs.

“Don’t worry, we’ll make up for the lost time.”

“You promise?” you ask as he turns the corner and reaches your street.

“I promise,” he nods smiling. When he parks in front of your building, you lean over and kiss him hard and needy before opening the door to get out.

“I’m expecting a text tonight from you,” you tell him, biting into your bottom lip as you smirk at him.

“Go, before I drag you back into the car and take you home!” he warns you chuckling.

“Is that a threat or—“ you start again, but he cuts you off.

“GO!”

“Okay, okay!” you giggle, shutting the door closed. You wave at him one last time from the door and then it’s over. Another night without knowing what it’s like to be fucked by Harry Styles.

Ramona is a mess.

When you get home, you find her sobbing and crying on the couch, wrapped up in several blankets, Adele playing through Kostas’ little JBL speaker while he is hoarding chocolate and alcoholic drinks to her, hoping she would at least breathe for a moment.

It takes a hell lot of time to get her to speak without hiccupping every other word, or starting to ugly cry at the mentioning of Dean’s name. After a while, you tell her to just call him D to prevent from breaking over and over again.

And then finally she tells you what happened.

Apparently, Kostas was right about Dean’s frequent trips back home. His dad’s health hasn’t been the best, his heart problems have been getting worse lately and he needed help with the family business he started with his brother. Dean has been trying to go back and forth, but it has gotten to the point where he needs to move back to his parents to help them out with the business. That means that him and Ramona would have to go long distance, but that’s the one thing she refuses to do.

“I saw what it does to people!” she sobs. “My parents did long distance for almost two years and they almost got a fucking divorce!”

If Dean moves back home, it means they would live four hours away from each other for over a year, at least until Ramona finishes school. But that doesn’t mean it would be over even after that, if Dean has to take over the business fully, Ramona would have to move there to be with him, but you know for a fact she doesn’t want to live in a little town.

It’s an impossible situation and in the heat of the argument they went ahead of the drama and called it quits, but it’s now breaking Ramona’s heart.

It’s past midnight by the time Ramona basically faints into bed from all the crying. You make sure she had everything she needs by her bed and then let her rest.

“So, where were you?” Kostas asks as he is cleaning up all the used tissues from the living room floor.

“Huh?” You can feel panic rising in your guts.

“Where were you? With an overnight bag?” he asks, nodding at your bag you took to Harry’s and just dropped by the door once you arrived back home.

“Oh, um… just… got a booty call.”

“What? From who? Since when do you have anyone to hook up with?” he asks with his eyes wide.

“Just a guy I met on Tinder, nothing serious.”

“Is he any good though?” he smirks, wiggling his eyebrows.

“I don’t… know yet. You called before we could…”

“Ah shit, I’m sorry,” he sighs pouting his lips. “Hope it happens next time,” he winks at you before heading back to his room.

“Yeah, me too,” you mumble before doing the same.

It’s the first time you’re checking your phone in a while tonight and you’re disappointed to see no texts from Harry. Your first thought is that he is pissed because you left, but that doesn’t make any sense, he seemed so laid back and nice about the situation, understanding that it was out of your control.

So instead of making up theories, you decide to text him.

Y/N: So… not thinking about me?

You send the text and move on with your night time routine, changing out of the lingerie set is way too sad knowing what was robbed from you tonight. It doesn’t take long for your phone to buzz with a text.

HARRY: I haven’t stopped thinking about you since I dropped you off.

You giggle like a little girl. It feels like you’re a teenager again, having a silly crush on an older boy.

Y/N: You’re so smooth.

HARRY: Indeed, I shaved this morning.

You can’t help but snort out a laugh. You’re not sure if he truly meant it as a joke or if he doesn’t entirely know what smooth means as a kind of slang, but either way, you loved it.

Y/N: That’s something we have in common.

HARRY: Gosh, don’t remind me of what I missed…

Y/N: I’m sorry :( I wish we weren’t interrupted.

HARRY: I’ll make sure to make up for the lost time when we can finally be alone.

Y/N: I can’t wait. Might gonna have to write down more of my fantasies.

You run to take a quick shower, thinking about what it would be like if Harry was there with you and he is still on your mind when you return to your room. You’re throwing off the comforter and extra pillows from your bed when your phone starts ringing and you answer it without even checking the caller ID, assuming that it’s Harry.

“Hey,” you coo into the phone, flopping down to your bed.

“Hey, so you’re not asleep!” The voice on the other end is not Harry’s. It’s Zion. Pulling the phone away from your ear you check the screen that it is indeed him. You’re kind of disappointed, but you wouldn’t want him to know.

“No, not yet, you know, I’m kind of a night owl,” you chuckle. “What’s up?”

“I’m having an early birthday celebration on Friday, you know how hard it is to bring anything together right before Christmas so I decided to have it earlier. Are you, by any chance, free?”

“Oh, yeah, I think I can make it,” you nod, trying to think through what you have coming up next week.

“Cool! I can’t wait to see you again. I’ll text you with the details!”

When you end the call you notice that you have an unread message from Harry.

HARRY: You can only write them if I’m the only one reading them.

Y/N: Only one to read them and act them out with me.

HARRY: Correct answer. Now go to sleep.

Y/N: Yes, professor!

The weekend, even though it didn’t turn out to be the way Harry wanted, keeps him thinking for the next few days. He won’t deny, he was devastated when you had to go, he’s been looking forward to spending the night with you for so long and you were so close to finally make your fantasies come true, but he would never hold it against you. Actually he admires you for being such a good friend, being there for your loved ones when they need you the most.

It’s just that he truly can’t stop thinking about you. And it’s not even entirely sexual anymore. Don’t get it wrong, he still thinks about fucking you in every possible position like a million times a day, but there are other thoughts as well. Like how you slept in the night, what you had for lunch, what made you laugh or if you had a bad day. If you thought about him as much as he did. He wants to hear your voice every waking moment, feel your touch and kiss your perfect, smooth lips whenever he pleases. It’s driving him off the walls, it takes all his energy to get him to focus on basically anything.

It’s Tuesday and it’s been a little less hectic than the past week. He has actually had the chance to leave his office for lunch. He has just finished up his last class for the day, students are flowing out of the room as he is packing up his stuff. He doesn’t even notice you walk in, stopping by the door. When he finally glances up and spots you, he can feel his heart skip a beat. You’re wearing light-washed jeans, a pink sweater that’s tugged into the hem of your jeans at the front, a plain totebag hanging from your shoulder, packed to the extent that it seems like it could rip any moment. You look so effortlessly beautiful, not too much makeup covering your pretty face, though he wishes there wasn’t any.

He watches as you push yourself away from the wall and walk closer as the last student leaves the room and now it’s just the two of you.

“Hey,” you smile at him softly, stopping just a few feet away from him.

“Hey, to what do I owe your surprise visit?”

“Oh, just wanted to talk about my final paper for your class, professor,” you smile at him teasingly.

“Is that so?” he cracks a half-smile as he leans against the edge of the desk.

Dropping your bag from your shoulder you quickly walk back to the door and close it before striding back to where Harry is, this time pushing yourself between his legs as you hook your arms around his neck.

“Y/N, this is risky,” he breathes out, but his hands find their way to your hips still, squeezing you gently, as if he is trying to make sure you’re really there.

“Just wanted to steal a moment with you to get me through the day,” you pout your bottom lip at him and leaning closer you press a soft kiss to his jawline. “Are we gonna give us another chance this weekend?”

“I’m free if you’re free,” he hums, his lips coming to meet with your cheek.

“Then it’s settled. I’ll make sure not to bring my phone this time,” you chuckle.

“Is your friend doing okay?”

“She is… coping. Though I think they will get back together. They have a lot of history, too much to just end like this.”

Humming he nods, his eyes wandering down to your lips and though you both know it’s risky to be doing this on campus and in a classroom where anyone can walk in, you still can’t hold yourself back.

Pressing his lips to yours, he kisses you in such a needy and greedy way, you can feel just how much he’s been thinking about you since the last time you saw each other. You return the kiss just as vehemently, feeling him against you bringing you a sense of fulfillment and even though you’re still kissing him, you’re already missing the touch of his lips, knowing you won’t get to do it for way too long.

“I have to go, I have a class in ten,” you sigh, but go in for another kiss just as his hand moves down to grab a handful of your ass, a small moan escaping your lips.

“This foreplay… is getting way too long,” he groans, stealing one last kiss before letting go of you.

Not too willingly, but you grab your bag from the floor and giving him one last coy glance over your shoulder, you exit the room. Harry needs to take a deep breath, knowing he will be thinking about these few moments for the rest of the day, if not the whole week.

Heading back to his office he runs into Nina who also just finished her class, so the two of them walk together through the hallways.

“Are you coming tomorrow?” Nina asks, but Harry just wrinkles his forehead.

“Coming where?”

“Joseph’s retirement dinner? You know, he sent out the invitations weeks ago.”

Now Harry remembers, but so much has happened in the past weeks, he completely forgot about Dr. Kennedy’s retirement. He’s been teaching at the university for decades and he has decided to spend more time with his grandkids after losing his wife two years ago. He is hosting a big dinner to his colleagues to thank the great time he has had working with them.

“Oh, right. Uh, yeah of course I’m going.”

“How was your weekend?” she asks with a warm smile.

“Not how I planned but it was alright,” he admits with a huff.

“How was yours?”

“Had to meet up with my ex-husband, he finally took his stuff he left behind,” she sighs.

“He’s still a prick?” he chuckles.

“Absolutely. But I’m finally free from him completely.”

“Enjoy your freedom.”

“I’m trying,” she smiles bashfully, a blush appearing in her cheeks as she keeps glancing at Harry who is just silently walking beside her, his thoughts still completely stuck on you.

Wednesday morning, you wake up from a wet dream. Chest heaving, your whole body covered in sweat, you were so close to your climax when your phone’s alarm went off.

And of course, it was about Harry.

This dream sets the mood for the whole day. You’re needy and whiny, want nothing else than to be with Harry. And the scariest part is that you don’t necessarily want it in a sexual way. You just want to be around him, be able to touch him. You still remember the intimacy of just watching him cook in his kitchen, sharing some wine and talking. It’s becoming pretty clear.

You’re starting to fall for him and you haven’t even had sex with him.

You’re not quite sure how to feel about it though. This was all supposed to be just a mind-blowing hook up, a chance to get this obsession about Harry out of your system, but it’s starting to grow bigger and you’re not sure if you’re ready for that.

The day goes by in kind of a blur, you keep thinking about your class with Harry, seeing him, getting to just listen to him for ninety minutes. Definitely the highlight of your day. The end of semester is draining you, staying up late most nights to get as much done as possible so you’ll have the weekend free to be with Harry. You’re a bit ahead of your schedule, since you didn’t lose Sunday last weekend. Even though you spent half the day with Ramona in her room, trying to cheer her up just the slightest, you could still squeeze some work in.

You’d do anything to have the most unbothered time with Harry this week. Nothing can ruin it for you.

You’re already in the classroom when Harry arrives, his eyes are quick to spot you sitting in your usual seat. Trying to keep your smile hidden, you move your eyes down at your notes from your previous class to keep you busy, but you can’t help but focus on his moving form you see from the corner of your eyes. Your phone’s screen lights up and you grab it as if anyone could see it even though no one is sitting anywhere near you.

HARRY: A skirt again? Are you torturing me?

Smirking you glance up finding him already looking at you, mindlessly playing with his phone as he is sitting behind his desk. Just as you start typing your response, a girl walks up to him with a few questions about the final assignment.

Y/N: Want to find out whether I’m wearing underwear or not?

Sending the message you have your eyes glued to him. Listening to the girl explaining her questions, he sees his phone’s screen lighting up and he glances there for just a second, but you see him stiffen right away, his darkened eyes snapping up to meet yours. Grinning to yourself you just return to staring down at your notes and let him finish with his student. When she finally walks back to her seat Harry grabs his phone and types his response.

HARRY: You’re being a brat. Gonna have to teach you a lesson.

Y/N: Bring it on, professor.

It’s obvious that Harry tries to avoid looking at you throughout the class, only because whenever his gaze wanders over you, he needs to hold back a smile. Not sure if anyone else notices it, but you definitely do, the way the corners of his mouth curl up as he continues on with his little speeches.

It’s getting impossibly hard to resist jumping his bones. Especially when he leans against his desk, holding onto the edge and you involuntarily bite into your bottom lip as you see the veins on the back of his hands, running up his arms. This should be illegal.

You plan to sneak a few minutes with him after class, but once he dismisses everyone, another professor walks in, telling him something and Harry just nods. You know when he looks your way that he has to leave fast. Flashing him a tiny smile you let him know it’s alright.

After class, you make one last trip to the library, finishing up a paper so you have one less thing on your list for the end of the semester. After a while, you can’t even pretend like you’re working, your thoughts keep circling back to Harry.

What is it exactly that the two of you are doing? It was about sex at first, that’s pretty clear, but since you’ve had to face some obstacles in that department, something definitely shifted. All the craving to be near him, to see him, hear his voice, it’s definitely more than just a physical attraction.

But how does he feel about you? Judging from the way he’s been acting, the cooking, the talking, the little touches, it definitely feels like it’s more to him as well. But he is older, it could be just his usual gentleman behavior he puts up with everyone, not just with you. You remember him saying that he doesn’t do casual, but then he also said that he would do just about anything to fuck you, what if it’s all just part of that?

You need to sort things out. Especially once you finally get to have sex with him, because that will most likely break the dam for you. And now that you’ve been thinking about him for the past twenty minutes, you can’t fight the urge to see him right now.

Checking the time you decide to ask Harry if he is still in his office.

HARRY: Still here, have to finish a few more things.

Y/N: I’ll drop by in a bit.

You quickly gather your stuff and head over to the building where his office is, hoping to have a few unbothered minutes with him.

It’s around seven now, most classes are over and only the eager professors are lingering around campus. The hallway leading to Harry’s office is dead, but you see light coming through the open door and your heart skips a beat at the thought of seeing him. However, as you get closer, you hear voices coming from inside, one belongs to him and one to a woman. With quiet steps, you get as close to the door as possible and though you know you shouldn’t eavesdrop on the conversation, you can’t help yourself.

“Is it okay if I ride with you? My car is at the service,” you hear the female voice and you recognize it as Professor Alvarez’s.

“Sure, no problem. We can leave in about twenty,” Harry answers.

“Great. I’ve heard a lot about this place, they have the best desserts!” she enthuses and your vision blurs from jealousy.

These two are having dinner together? Again? Harry said it was just a friendly thing when you were at his place and he was so keen on disappearing from the house. But you’ve seen the way she looked at him in his office last time when she interrupted your time with him.

“You cleaned up for the occasion nicely,” she giggles. You try to think back at what he was wearing earlier, but it was nothing special, just his usual, has he changed? This has to be a date then.

“Thanks,” he chuckles. “You look nice too.”

Nice? You don’t see her but you bet she looks awful.

No, that’s a lie, she always looks wonderful, she is by far the hottest female professor on campus. Shit, you’re so fucked.

The rest of their conversation blurs because you back away from the office and once you’re far enough from them, you start running. You feel silly for thinking this was more than just anything casual, he is still out there, dating women that are age appropriate for him and probably please him better than you can.

On your way home you quickly send him a message.

Y/N: Something came up, can’t make it.

His reply comes just seconds later.

HARRY: Everything alright?

Y/N: Sure. Have fun tonight.

HARRY: ??

You don’t answer, just put your phone on mute and shove it to the bottom of your bag as you march home, raging and boiling in anger and jealousy.

NEXT PART

Thank you for reading! Please like and reblog if you enjoyed!

[zarnzarn]

Stolitz fic rec!!

||

I'm going to just drop my favorite stolitz fics here.

They run at night by @wearemisfortune

Blitzo is always moving because when his body stops, his mind races. This almost always leads to a terrible fucking idea.

Tonight is no different—but the result will be.

-lovely angst, lovely climax, and it captures Blitz's line of thinking in a serious tone but in a way still feels authentic to the character. And I'm ALWAYS a sucker for the sheer unconditional trust trope.

Junctures by @sluttycrimehat

To everything, there is a season.

-I still am in complete awe of how the author managed to fit so much in such little time. The bit at the end always fucking gets me, I love it so MUCH.

The last general by @curtailed

It's in a month after, with Stolas spent and lying on his side, that Blitzo finally musters up the courage to tell him.

-Hello??? BEAUTIFUL post-harvest moon fic, wonderful vibes, love how well they know each other in this one, the trust is amazing. Love it.

You got everything that I want by @bipridemoth

Stolas can’t recall a time where “love” wasn’t synonymous with “pain” for him.

With Blitzo, it’s not love. So, there’s no pain. Stolas doesn’t let there be pain, at least not emotionally, the physical pain is something he quite enjoys. When Blitzo leaves after their monthly night together, he doesn’t allow himself to feel pain, only anticipation of the next time. He likes that there’s always a next time, even though that’s because of his active incentive more than anything else. But that’s alright, he doesn’t want Blitzo to come see him without an incentive. He deserves favors in turn for what he’s giving Stolas.

-Stolas angst!!!! The angst really is delicious in this one, with just as nice of a happy ending. Blitz is confident about the relationship, which is Wonderful to read and the "I know where this is going" segment had me in TEARS.

Between fairy tales and realities by @coloringthegreyscale

Blitzo's a complicated imp and Striker and Stolas accept that. But what happens when the two worlds he's made for himself collide together for one night? Well...

-Okay, so yes, this is striker/blitz/stolas, but it's so good. All three of them have a lovely dynamic, managing to work out somehow, with powerful Stolas, wonderful Blitz and a HILARIOUS Striker. Go read the series, it's a lot of fun and has many cute interactions that made me smile.

The look by @seireileafy

Blitz has been noticing a change in Stolas.

-It's such a CUTE drabble, I adore when one person can tell the other is pining for them, and the LAST LINE FUCKING GETS ME EVERY TIME-

Instead I made my bed with apathy by @thebooklord15

Just like every night before this one, Blitzo glared at the form next to him, already lulled into the bliss of slumber. He had never meant for things to turn out this way-he’d gotten the grimoire already, he didn’t need this man and from the way Stolas treated him it was clear he did not need the imp either.

And yet.

-Jcjdkafj this one is so GOOD I love blitz being pissed off yet too deep in to stop, and like I've said for others already THAT LAST LINE, PLEASE-

Call and response by anon

It was a love story, maybe.

-short but deliciously angsty, with some beautiful imagery, really nice dialogue, and time-doesn't-exist-in-this-motel-room vibes. Love it.

Shovel proof by @kereea

Octavia tries to give Blitzo the shovel talk. He decides to help with that.

-FUCKING cute, love the Octavia/Blitz dynamic, and it has snappy fun dialogue!! Really sweet.

Reaching out, touching me, touching you by @allmightshipserasermic

Stolas hasn’t been able to preen sufficiently in quite awhile, since Stella refuses to do it for him anymore. Blitzo offers to help.

-PREENING FIC is there anything more I have to say?

The skin you could have by @coloringthegreyscale

Stolas catches Blitzo staring and it leads to some talk, some magic, and a little bit of fun.

-Again, BEAUTIFUL dynamic between the two, lots of angsty tenderness, and lovely body imagery.

Different shapes by @sirdust

“Before the exorcist, he taketh the image and shape of a man.”

Blitz catches a glimpse of Stolas’ human form.

-okay, practically a direct opposite of the previous fic, but SO GOOD, I can't describe it. Love the imagery and their comfortable relationship.

A helluva mess by @stratumgermanitivum

It’s not like Stolas isn’t a hot piece of ass, because he is.

And it’s not like Blitzo’s blind or anything, because he isn’t.

It’s just that there’s pleasure, and then there’s business, and never the twain shall meet. (Unless he finally gets Moxx on board with that threeway, in which case, Blitzo fully intends to christen every damn surface of the office except his precious Loony’s desk.)

-AMAZING, love the pining and denial on both sides it's so great especially since you can tell both sides know that they've messed up. Again, LAST LINE!!

Eat the whole cake (it's what you deserve) by @okoyik

"His Highness is on the phone for you, sir," Moxxie says.

Blitzo makes a face. "Who?"

"Stolas," Moxxie supplies, as if that's supposed to help Blitzo understand. His expression is surely one of complete confusion as he stares at the other imp.

"Who the fuck is Stolas?" Blitzo asks slowly, racking his brain for a face to put to the name.

-

Blitzo's memory starts to slip, and all he knows is he needs that owl that seems to haunt his nightmares to stay away.

-HELLO it's only on one out of four chapters for now but it's already SO GOOD I can't WAIT for the rest!!!

Stand tall, but your hands are shaking by @remymorton

It’s been a month since the Harvest Moon festival. Another full moon night arrived, and after that... Blitz ... He's not well.

-wordless cute comfort, truly very sweet, I love it.

Palaces and souvenirs by @cloudysonder

So Stolas is objectively. Objectively. Attractive. Kinda soft-looking, sometimes. Pretty. Whatever. Fuckin’ whatever. That’s always been a thing. Blitzo knew that, Stolas definitely knew that-- whatever.

"This is not," Blitzo thinks, sounding a little bit desperate even to himself, "some sort of revelation."

His flicks of the lighter get a little more unstable, a little more frustrated.

A clawed hand reaches over and takes hold of the lighter, lighting Blitzo’s cigarette with practiced ease, as if he’d done the same thing a thousand times before (He has, Blitzo realizes).

“Silly Blitzy,” he giggles quietly, giving Blitzo a soft pat on the head before curling up beside him, stretching one last time before closing his eyes to sleep.

Blitzo feels warm.

"This," Blitzo tells himself, and it sounds like a command, "will not be a problem."

-I saw the start of this fic on Twitter and have been following it religiously ever since. It's really a gorgeous fic, three chapters up, with the promise of a Great slow burn, fun dialogue and Octavia & Blitz bonding. The level of denial Blitz is in even as he moves comfortably around every aspect of Stolas' life cracks me tf up.

Can't by @hazbincalifornia

Blitzo realizes he feels something something that he doesn't want to feel. This was supposed to be simple.

-feelings realization fic, wonderful, amazing, lovely, also the exact same way I realized I was gay, funnily enough (girl fell asleep in my lap and I was like oh. Oh fuck.)

Too late to stop by @malkaviancake

Stolas spends some time with his thoughts, realizing that his feelings for Blitzo aren't as one sided as he presumed.

-GORGEOUS vocab, I'm truly very obsessed with it. Like most of these stories, LAST LINE!!!!

Itchy with want, thin on sleep by me

It happens in parts- both falling in love and having his eyes opened.

-I will,, finish this one day, but for now here's a few in between moments before they have The Conversation.

Heaven in hiding by me

Their nights together are good, they always are, both of their tastes lining up to be shockingly compatible, but on the days where they end early and they get to spend some extra time cleaning up in comfortable silence or playful banter- and Blitz would rather take a bullet than admit this out loud- but those nights are pretty great too.

-AFTERCARE FIC, I had to write an aftercare fic ft. Good dom Blitz, Stolas taking care of him in return and a comfortable relationship that they both know is going to cause Problems in the future :)

Love in the bones and sinews of this curse by me

Five times Stolas and Blitz needed the grimoire to break a curse + one time they didn't.

-self explanatory. I tried to make it as funny as possible, everyone bickers a lot and Blitz brings Stolas flowers and gifts, what more could you need?

Life is a curse (love makes it worse) by me

"Alright!" Blitz says, clapping his hands together, "Weapons out, and-"

Half pull out some gun or the other, but half just look at him blankly. Blitz wishes for death.

"Save me from this family," He mutters under his breath, "Okay. Take these then." He passes out the few weapons he'd brought along with him and doesn't ask if they know how to use them because if he hears a no, he's giving up and going back home. "Stick close and talk loudly so the others can hear us. Let's go."

They move out, Blitz taking the lead and the rest forming a circle close behind him, starting up a loud conversation about the neighbour's garden. It gives him enough time to wonder exactly what the fuck he's doing here, in a nightmare world with a bunch of pretentious snobs, searching for his stupid Ars Goetia boyfriend, instead of sleeping in his nice lumpy bed back at home.

-a sequel to the previous fic!!! I had to write some Octavia and Blitz bonding, and accidentally added in a bunch of teenage imps who work for Stolas who imprint on Blitz immediately. And there's Eldritch Stolas, protective boyfriends and found family!!! The whole shebang!!!

This ended up being Much longer than I'd expected, but genuinely every fic up there is really good, go check em out!!!!

[ayuuria]

Yashahime Translation: Animedia January 2021 Issue

Please do not repost this translation without my consent! This includes screenshots of any type and amount. If you wish to share this translation, simply link to this post.

For more information regarding the use of my translations, click here.

I do apologize if some of the translations feel awkward. This one was slightly technical so I had to do some research on the side.

Animedia Education Lecture

You think you know but you surprisingly don’t

Working in Anime

— ­Editing Edition –

A corner where we delve into the work of anime production. This time, we ask Nii Kazuhiro of (share) IMAGICA Lab., who handles the editing for “Hanyō no Yashahime”, about editing!

The job of “editing” is vital not just in anime but also in live movies and tv dramas. People who like films may be able to vaguely imagine the burden of having the big role of organizing the scenes. However, exactly what sort of work do they do in anime production? This time, Mr. Nii Kazuhiro of (share) IMAGICA Lab., who oversees the editing of the action packed “Hanyō no Yashahime”, makes an appearance! We had him discuss editing and the special work process unique to “Hanyō no Yashahime”.

Tell us Nii-san! Let’s learn about “Editing”

Q: What kind of job is “Editing”?

It is a job that manages the flow of the whole film by connecting scenes or shots together. For example, how well a signature move in battle or sports is executed is dependent upon the tempo adjustment “editing”. Other things like scenes where shots are divided effectively by the placement of songs or music in an important work, will always have an editor’s hand (adjustment) involved. Even if the animation is created to flow exactly like the storyboard, a lot of times the timing of those scenes is fine-tuned with editing. Timing is just as important as properly moving images after all.

Q. During what phase of the anime production do you work?

Typically in anime, shots are edited at a phase where the color and sound have not yet been added and is completed as each phase in the production moves forward. Editing takes place before the audio work. Basically, it occurs twice: before voice recording and dubbing (translator’s note: Dubbing here does not mean voice over! Dubbing is the phase where they mix the voicing, sound effects, and music together to match the images). There are many works where color is added after dubbing has concluded, but in “Hanyō no Yashahime”, in order to allow for dubbing with the color, colored images are used as materials when editing. Since the images are colored, we can confirm the fine details with the director and production supervisor and then make adjustments.

Q. How does one become an “Editor”?

I entered a vocational school focused on film making and learned not just about editing but film making as a whole such as filming and lighting. There wasn’t any convenient editing software at the time, so I joined my current company that does film production thinking “Editing is something that can’t be self-taught so I want to learn on the job”. If you want to pursue editing, then you should watch as many different types of films as you can. You can’t notice things in production like direction and the camera angle of a shot if you don’t have interest in it, so I think it’s best to study it for the sake of knowledge.

Q. What abilities are needed for “Editing”?

Communication skills are an absolute must. Especially in animation which has a lot of detailed work itineraries and staff members creating it. To ensure that there are no mistakes, you must ask the director or production supervisor on anything you are unsure of. Of course, you can’t keep asking questions on every single shot so there are times where you will need to understand past productions and make decisions yourself. However, being able to muster up the courage and ask when necessary is important. You need communication skills for that purpose.

The “Hanyō no Yashahime” Production Site Packed with Fixations

— Please tell us the details on how you came to oversee the editing in “Hanyō no Yashahime”.

I had the opportunity to work with Director Satō (Teruo) on “Aikatsu Stars!” and he reached out to me. Since the story was connected to “Inuyasha”, which was broadcasted when I was a child, I felt a lot of pressure at first. While I was nervous when I heard the that main staff hadn’t changed much from “Inuyasha”, I felt “That’s all the more reason I have to work hard”.

— In regard to the editing work, did Director Satō make any demands?

I touched on this earlier in my response to “what phase we work” where I discussed how the director requested “Please have the images close to completion before the dubbing, where the music and voicing will be decided finalized, takes place. I would like to have editing done just before the dubbing as well.” This is what makes this so different from other works.

For example, in action scenes when the image is unfinished, it’s hard to understand the small movements or context. Hence, it’s difficult to take a “Maybe make the tempo like this” sort of editing approach. In typical animes, there are a lot of times where the final images solidify after the sound is completed. When that happens, there’s not much room to make edits for the most part.

However, in “Hanyō no Yashahime”, the images are mostly done before the dubbing so we can make adjustments with the director while matching the images with the voice actor’s lines. I thought it was a good idea. This is a trait unique to this work.

— Was there an aspect that you yourself focused on when editing this work?

While it’s a work with a lot of serious developments, what I focus on during those scenes is the “the interval between emotions”. In live film works, for thinking scenes, the actor’s “thinking act” is included so there’s an interval. However, in anime, the movement simply stops and there are no lines, so a lot of times you can’t measure the interval. Nevertheless, those serious scenes are important in “Hanyō no Yashahime” so I think it’s important to have “intervals” which is what I’m careful about. On the other hand, there are comical scenes, so I’m careful not to destroy the tempo. In anime, the tempo can change if it’s off by 6 frames*

*1 frame = 24 frames per second

The Feeling of Fun in Doing “Editing” Work

— In anime editing, does the work’s genre make a difference?

It does. Lately in action and sport (animes), materials included are not just from the storyboard but also from 3D CG as well, so we’re careful to make sure the connection between that and normal image (2D) scenes don’t feel out of place. When I first started, I couldn’t get the hang of it and was at a loss. The 3D CG portion is done by a different production team instead of the animation (drawing) team, so during my edits I couldn’t visualize the complete final form and fumbled as I worked.

In terms of idol anime, there’s “Aikatsu Stars!” that I worked with Director Satō on, but I was still a novice then… In work that’s geared towards children, I focused on making the tempo of the conversation scenes as steady as possible. If the tempo is too fast, it will end with everything being breezed through and a child will become unable to follow. I remember being careful of that.

— Are there times where you have to edit multiple episodes at the same time?

I mainly only work on one episode at a time. It’s just that periodically I have to confirm and make adjustments on a line-by-line basis in another episode at the same time.

— What part of “Editing” do you feel makes the jobs worthwhile?

In anime, images and CG shots that have been completed at each phase of the process are gathered individually as materials for editing. Updating those materials into one new episode and getting to see the finished product first is what “Editing” is. I think this is what makes the job of “Editing” fun the most. I get a sense of responsibility that I’m managing not only the shots but the entire work as a whole. Also, because I’ve seen the production process, I feel happy and simply moved like “That’s amazing” when all the phases are completed and the whole anime is finished. This is when I feel worthwhile as an editor. Also, I don’t think there’s much opportunity to take part in the production of the character movement and camera work in live filming, so I think this is what makes editing anime fun.

— After going through all the work, how do you feel when you watch the broadcasting of the finished version?

I end up watching it from different angles but when I watch it as a regular viewer, I become happy nonetheless. Of course, there are times where I personally think “I should’ve done this” at the little things. Now with social media, I know the viewers’ reactions in real time, so when there was a huge response to episode 1 with Inuyasha and the others, that put pressure on me going forward (laughs).

The Charm of “Hanyō no Yashahime” That You Personally Enjoy

— Of all the episodes that have been broadcasted thus far, which episode left the biggest impression on you?

Episode 3 where the three heroines (Towa, Setsuna, and Moroha) came together. I got to watch the (voice) recording for that episode and the battle scene was really cool. Also, I was able to properly draw the first conversation between the three so that left the biggest impression on me in that sense.

Then there’s episode 7. It’s the episode where you return to the scene of the three of them that at the very beginning of episode 1. The composition of back tracking up to episode 1 left an impression on me, so even as I was editing episode 7, I admired how it felt like the mystery was being revealed or rather feeling like “I see. This is where it connects”.

— By the way, who is your favorite character personally?

Moroha. She’s fundamentally an energetic character, her skills in action scenes are cool, and the way she seems to mimic the movements of her father, Inuyasha, is entertaining as well. While she behaves in a manner that makes you wonder if she had a tragic past, she’s a character whose emotions are easy to read so that’s why she’s my favorite.

— Including upcoming highlights, please give a message to our readers.

Going forward there will be more episodes regarding the three heroine’s past which I think is a highlight. As I was editing a future episode, I felt “We’re approaching the true nature of the story”. Please look forward to the cool action scenes and the episode where the three’s past will become clear.

[alolowrites]

Masterlist

© All rights reserved—please do not repost, redistribute, or use any of my stories in any other format or medium (i.e. ASMR) or other platforms (youtube, tiktok, etc). Most importantly, please do NOT plagiarize any of my stories.

I will only post my stories here on Tumblr and AO3. If you see my stories anywhere else, please let me know! Thank you!

-alolowrites. 

AO3 Account

Kofi (Tips welcome, but not necessary!)

Updated: 7.22.2021

Recent Stories: Thinking of You (AOT); Gymtleman  (BNHA); 

U.A. Students

Denki Kaminari

Serenade: Your sweet boyfriend serenades for you outside your balcony one night at the U.A. dorms.

Drabbles

Small Competition: Your boyfriend encounters a young boy who has a puppy crush on you.

Eijirou Kirishima

Acceptance: You and Kirishima enjoy a nice date at an amusement park until you relive a painful memory from your childhood. [Warning: Angst; Body Image]

Love Conquers All: You question whether or not you deserve Kirishima after a petty gossip site writes a cruel post about you. [Hurt/comfort]

The Nightly Adventures of a Lost Shopper: Getting lost at night is one thing. But stumbling upon some crazy beating in a musty back alley? Yeah, no thanks. [Mafia AU; Warning: slight mention of blood]

The Precious Diamond on the Swing: The swings at the local park always had a special place in both Kirishima and his daughter’s heart.

Hanta Sero

A Vision Come to Life:  Every artist wants to bring their own paintings to life. Sero is no different after he becomes infatuated with you—a beautiful stranger who exists in his dreams. One night he sees your face and decides to paint you with all his heart. [Painter AU]

Hitoshi Shinsou

A Beautiful Blessing: Someone leaves a mysterious box outside your apartment in the middle of the storm. Fortunately, no one gets hurt. 

Fuzzy Socks: Shinsou loves how short you are and he never, ever lets you forget it.

Hands Off: You’re working at a cantina when a customer gets aggressive with you. Fortunately, your favorite bounty hunter is there to rescue you. [Bounty Hunter AU]

Midnight Fantasies: Shinsou reminds you why you’ll always love him. [Warnings: NSFW; minors do NOT interact]

On The Run: Staying in one place was never a good idea. It was risky and only caused more problems for you. However, an exception was made for Minato—a city under Shinsou’s watch. [Pro Hero AU]

The One Thing You Don’t Regret: Tonight was a night full of regrets, or so you thought.

Workout: You’re trying to finish up your job assignment, but get distracted by Shinsou’s workout routine.

Drabbles 

Abuelita’s Hot Chocolate: Shinsou returns home from work one freezing night. Fortunately, you whip him up a nice cup of Mexican hot chocolate.  

Small Competition: Your boyfriend encounters a young boy who has a puppy crush on you.

Izuku Midoriya

Happy Birthday: It’s your birthday and Izuku surprises you with a cake [Warning: slight angst; hurt/comfort]

The Neighbor from Apartment 512: You have a crush on your new neighbor, Izuku Midoriya, who lives right across the hall.

Witch Doctor’s Orders: Midoriya visits the Witch Doctor after he breaks his arm.

Katsuki Bakugou

Comforting Words: You return to the U.A. dorms following a disastrous date. Surprisingly, Bakugou offers some “comforting words” to you. [Slight sequel to Laundry Night; 100 Followers Special]

Everyone’s Got a Sweet Tooth!: Bakugou hates sweets. You don’t think this is true and begin a mission to discover his favorite candy. After all, you are the brilliant Candy Master who won’t stop until Bakugou’s sweet tooth is satisfied. 

Gold Coins and a Gold Heart: Bakugou is forced to help give out candy at your factory’s annual Halloween trick-or-treating event—costume included. [Sequel to Everyone’s Got a Sweet Tooth!]

Gymtleman: Nothing irks you more than a random guy ruining your workout session. Luckily, Bakugou sets him straight. [Warning: slight harassment].

Juice: Bakugou’s daughter demands juice, but he refuses.

Laundry Night: It’s a Saturday night which means it’s laundry night for you. You try to relax while your clothes get clean, but someone didn’t get the memo and rudely disrupts your self-care time.

Missed You: Bakugou realizes how much he still misses you after seeing you at the Hero Gala. [Secret Santa Fic]

Sleepless Nights: Bakugou can’t sleep ever since the brutal breakup and decides to do something about it.

Drabbles

Don’t Litter: Bakugou hates when people litter.

Piggyback Rides: You ask your boyfriend for a piggyback ride.

Small Competition: Your boyfriend encounters a young boy who has a puppy crush on you.

Mirio Togata

No Capes!: Mirio visits you at work for a lunch date, but plans change when he meets the one and only Edna Mode.

The Helpful Elf: The Hippity Hop Cat toy is the toy on every kid’s wish list this year, including Eri’s. With the toy flying off the shelves, you desperately ask Mirio, the Helper Elf at Hazuki’s ToyLand, for help. And Mirio doesn’t give up, especially when it comes to you. [BNHASanctuary Winter Collab Story]

Shouto Todoroki

A Late Night Promise: Much to your dismay, you share an elevator ride with Shouto after staying late at the office one night. 

Dance With Me: You share a magical dance with the handsome instructor—Shouto Todoroki.

Get on the Floor: Todoroki invites you to his successful nightclub. Meanwhile, you invite the dashing man to join you on the dance floor after catching his eye. [AU]

Drabbles

Piggyback Rides: You ask your boyfriend for a piggyback ride.

Small Donation: The holiday season is a time for giving, especially for those most in need. All month long, Shouto watches you collect donations for a local children’s hospital. One day, he finally musters up the courage to do the same and surprises you with his own small donation.

Tamaki Amajiki

Snow Globe Wonderland: On his way home from work, Tamaki stumbles upon a two things—a mysterious snow globe and you, a dancer who shows him a magical time.

Stolen Glances: Tamaki constantly steals glances at you, his crush, since he is too shy to speak with you. However, this changes one night at a bonfire party.

Heroes

Enji Todoroki/Endeavor

Vete: After feeling miserable in your relationship with Enji, you decide to kick him out of your life. 

Keigo Takami/Hawks

Free Sample: You take great pride in handing out some free samples of tempura chicken. They’re a great way to meet new people—including a certain wing hero who happens to enjoy your free sample.

Late Night Visitor: A mysterious stranger visits your balcony and accidentally leaves behind a priceless jewelry that they stole from a museum. [Crime AU] 

Drabbles 

Crowded Bird Cage: Hawks enjoys having you around. Your pet bird, Sora, is still a work in progress.

Rumi Usagiyama/Miruko

Drabbles

Flying Snowball: One crispy afternoon, you’re minding your own business when a jerk hits you with a snowball. Stupidly, you throw one back only to accidentally hit the fierce pro hero Miruko (also your number one crush).

Shouta Aizawa/Eraserhead

Pocky: You offer a pocky stick to your husband, Shouta Aizawa.

Three in the Morning: Shouta returns home to find you wide awake at three in the morning.

Drabbles

A Cry for Help: A hero finds a little girl crying and helps find her parents.

Taishiro Toyomitsu/Fatgum

Cuddling Through the Seasons: Fatgum’s cuddles never go out of season.

Drabbles

A Cry for Help: A hero finds a little girl crying and helps find her parents.

Toshinori Yagi/All Might

After All These Years: After being apart for six years, you wonder if you are ready to see Toshinori again. [Sequel to The Point of No Return] 

Need A Hand?: Toshinori thought visiting the park would bring him some peace of mind. Instead, he ends up chasing after your dog who stole his bony hand.

Sneezing Through Time: When you’re sick, you end up sneezing to random points in time.

The Point of No Return: Your relationship with Toshinori is put to the test after he refuses to back down from his responsibility for being the Symbol of Peace. [Warning: Heavy Angst] 

Drabbles

A Cry for Help: A hero finds a little girl crying and helps find her parents.

Villains

Dabi

Outlaws and Freaks: Dabi breaks you out of jail on Halloween night.

Regret: You thought sleeping with a stranger would help you cope with your heartbreak. You come to regret this decision months later. 

Sweet Delivery: Dabi decides to surprise you with a sweet gift on Halloween night.

Kurogiri

Creeps, Freaks, and Milkshakes: Google Maps is usually pretty good with their directions. One night, you stumble upon a place where monsters exist beyond the imaginary folktale pages and movie screens. You’re a little scared, but at least the handsome bartender makes some delicious milkshakes.

Tomura Shigaraki

Drabbles

Losing You: Shigaraki laments on his lost love.

Others

Natsuo Todoroki

Drabbles

2:05 Gingerbread Man Cookies: Finals week is in fully swing and you are stuck writing a paper at the library. At least it’s not so bad when Natsuo shares his gingerbread man cookies with you.

Rei Todoroki

Ring Off: Rei finds her happiness again during an afternoon walk.

Yo Shindou

Get Out of the Water: It’s late and you come across a stranger swimming in the water. [Mermaid AU]

Mr. Seat Stealer: There’s an unspoken rule in college about seats—once it’s claimed, no other person can sit in it. Too bad Shindou doesn’t care when it comes to your seat. [College AU]

Hero Camp Bingo Masterlist

Spooky Season 2020 Masterlist

FicMas Fest 2020 Masterlist

[2uselessgays]

Hanzo x Reader - Hanamura

This wretched place. This cursed castle. Two years of rich, livid history lived within these walls, the history of the Shimada clan. 

The battle that changed everything emptied this place. The two brothers - Genji and Hanzo Shimada - It shook the entire district of Hanamura, and ended in one of the brothers, Genji’s demise.

So today, you had come here to pay your respects to him. A worthy friend. Your eyes gazed before the mural that centred the courtyard of the castle. A corner had been cut, saturated in dried blood, the legendary blood of Genji.

As you walk closer to the mural, you hear something… Soft, quiet footsteps, trying to mask themselves. Someone else was here. No, someone was creeping up behind you. You look behind you, but nothing was there. ‘’What was that?"’ You think to yourself, pondering who it could possibly have been. No-one should have returned here, not ever. This horrid place should have been rid of any living creature, not even the omnics dare to go near it - thinking the battle that went on still curses everything that goes near. It should have been burnt to a crisp years ago.

You walk into the courtyard, warm, salty tears trailing down your face because of what had happened. You peacefully sit down against a wall, you grab a canvas and a paint brush and start painting in the castle. Another annual tribute to Genji. You thought everything was fine, and that everything is safe.. Until another sound gets made… It sounds like.. Human footsteps? They really do not want to be noticed, weird. You brush it off as the wind, thinking it was too quiet.. But oh boy, you were wrong. You feel as if someone was watching you. And that’s when it happened - An arrow, it flew right besides your head, gracing your hair. You quickly try to get up, but something stops you. The intruder had grabbed you firmly by the shoulder.

You turn your head and then it happened. You were face to face with the legendary (not) brother, Hanzo. He had grown from his past image. He had a beard now, well kept, and he had a small put atop his head, a ribbon laced around it. You muster up the courage ask him, ‘’Wh-what do you want from me?’’ In a shaky voice, fear betraying your tone.

‘’Why are you here?’’ He asks, sternly. You’re absolutely terrified, shaken up by fear, too much to answer him, and try to run away, but it doesn’t work. His grip tightens, his voice gets more serious, his face angry. His gaze burns deeply into your eyes, wanting a direct and honest answer. He wasn’t going to let you go easily. You weren’t stupid. You finally replied with ‘’Why would you care..? You killed your own brother! Forsaken him, brought immense dishonour to your family, Hanzo. Do you feel no remorse? Why would you protect this place?’’ He sighs deeply. Not answering your question, not saying anything at all. He looks at you, deeply, trying to figure out your intent. ‘’Well? Tell me!’’ You shout. ‘Fuck, why did I say that?’ You thought to yourself. 

Quite suddenly, his demeanour changes. His look changes to that of sorrow, his grip on you weakening. He let go of you, taking a moment to sit at the mural. You joined him, still cautious. “I come here annually to grieve the death of my brother. To reflect on the damage and dishonour I have brought. I did not expect to see anyone else here. Especially for the same reason as I. I will ask you again. Why are you here?”

You swallowed your bated breath, finally deciding to give an honest answer. He seemed genuine with you. You threw your head down, exhaling deeply. “I come here whenever I can to pay my respects to your brother, Genji. He was a dear friend to me. He was there for me when no-one else was. When I needed someone the most. That is why I can never let go of this place. You may see him as a playboy or a laid back fool, Hanzo, but he was far from that. He just didn’t want anything to do with the clan. Is that so wrong?” You say longingly, patiently waiting for an answer. “Answer me, Hanzo. Is that so wrong?” You say, raising your voice once more. You wanted to know so desperately why this man had killed your only and dearest friend.

Hanzo looked at you. With tears in his eyes and remorse in his voice, he spoke, voice barely above a whisper. He couldn’t control his sobs. ‘’I can only apologise, even though it may never change the past.. Killing my brother was my biggest mistake, my biggest regret, my biggest pain. It should have been me who passed away that night. It should have been me, it should have been me! I’m a mistake, I’m a disgrace, I’m a cold hearted murderer. Just because my brother wanted to live his own life away from our misdeeds.. Genji, forgive me..’’ Ending that sentence in tears all over. 

You look at him, angrily, but forgivingly. You realise he truly regrets his misdeed. So you decide to comfort him. You hesitantly wrap your arms around him, gently squeezing, as he relaxes into you, tears staining your skin, saying, ‘’Hanzo, I know you regret your past. And what you did was truly unforgivable. But you have to accept what happened to truly accept yourself and make it onto the path of redemption. The bittersweet release of death will never make up for Genji’s passing. But you can make up by doing good, helping the ones who need help.’’

It was then, that everything started to make sense to Hanzo. He needed you, he could not bear to feel this emptying loneliness any longer. He had to forbid you from leaving him.This feeling was foreign to him. Hanzo did not confess, people confessed to him. It was a new feeling, one he could not cope with. He was too stubborn to admit this feeling would defeat him. You part ways before he could say anything else.

He sat in the bar, drowning his feelings in sake. It wasn’t strong enough to mute everything in his mind. But he could not stop thinking about you. No matter what he did, who he talked to. All that was on his mind was you. He had never felt like this ever before, so he had no idea what the hell to do or how to express these feelings. He’d see you around Hanamura, but did not know how to approach or strike up conversation. So, all he could think of... was going to the castle. Hoping and praying he would see you there again, so he could talk to you. But his attempt was hopeless. You never came, not a single time for 2 months. But he would not give up, he never would, remaining steadfast. Even after these 2 months it was only you that was in this mind. Despite all that, life still went on.

Another month passed.

Another two.

A year had gone by.

The day of Genji’s death had come once again, and he had firm hope you’d be at the castle to pay your respects to the younger Shimada. And there you were, finally after a year. He’d see you again. Except, you weren’t alone. You were with someone. You were holding hands. You embraced that person when you couldn’t hold back tears. He had almost given up completely… Until they left. You were all alone again, so you went back to the courtyard. Back to the exact spot where you met Hanzo. Back to the arrow that was still in the wall. You once again grabbed your unfinished painting from last year and your brushes. 

As you sat down, you started painting the castle once again.. But something was different. There was no sound, not even the sound of wind. Nothing. You sighed very deeply, disappointed that you did not see him.. The one person you wanted to see all this time. When you finished the painting, you heard a voice. The voice said, ’’You have mastered a skillful art. Where did you learn to paint like that?’’ You recognise that voice. With a smile on your face you turn around to see him. He was standing right there. He hadn’t changed a bit. Like he hadn’t aged at all. ‘’I hoped I would see you here.’’ Hanzo said longingly, hoping for a reaction back. ‘’I… I waited a year for you, why did you never come…?’’ You say.

 With a frown on his face he sat down next to you. As he explained everything to you, you got closer to him. To the point you were basically touching each other… Without thinking twice you wrap your arms around him once again, saying, ‘’I’m so sorry. I never knew you didn’t know how to tell me… I should have come to you, Hanzo. I saw you all over Hanamura, yet never thought once to approach, thinking you had better things to do. I regret my hesitation greatly. It’s all okay now, you’ve told me everything.’’ 

‘’Hanzo.. I know we don’t know each other at all. But I genuinely feel like… Like we have known each other for years.. And I just don’t want to leave you again. It hurt so much last time.. So, promise me.. You won’t leave me this time? Stay by my side, be happy with me…’’ You say with a concerned voice. 

‘’I promise.’’ he mutters.

--------------------------------------------------

Hope you enjoyed! Part 2 coming soon.

Posted on Wattpad too.

Written collaboratively by ☆Mod Sakura and ♡Mod Noel

[saltmageelliexiv]

Disclaimer: This story contains sexual/mature themes, please read with caution.

Added note: This story was originally written by @asterixkearn​, who has given me full consent to post on my blog. Please give them a follow; they are not only an amazing writer and roleplayer, but a very good friend of mine.

---------------

"Hold still." 

"I'm trying!..."

"You aren't trying hard enough."

"It hurts!..."

Asterix let out a soft sigh as she lifted her chisel from her canvas of pale skin. "No, it doesn't. It's just pricking you a little."

"How would you know?" The Miqo'te glanced back at the Xaelan woman, letting out a whine as her back began to throb softly, "You don't even have any!"

"Even if I don't have any, I'm more than capable of giving you one, especially a temporary one." She thwapped the chisel against the woman's skin softly, eliciting a yelp of surprise, "And I also know how much they actually hurt - which is to say, very little!...."

"So you don't think it's weird that a tattoo artist doesn't have any of her own?"

"If you wanna look at it this way; I've never had a tattoo because I'm far too invested in making sure all of you get the tattoos you want. I've even given your Madam some of hers."

"I know, I just- Ow!"

"I told you not to move." Asterix brushed off the woman's back, rolling her eyes.

The Miqo'te let out a soft whine as the Xaela went back to her work without delay, the rhythmic tapping of the tribal chisel filling the room, "You know there's machines for this now, right?"

"I do."

"And you don't use them, why?"

"I thought about getting one from the Ironworks, but I'm just more comfortable with my Tebori style."

"Tebori?" She inquired.

"It was a style invented in Doma some centuries ago. And if it was good enough for the ancient Domans, it's good enough for you." The pain finally ceased as Asterix pulled away from her work, nodded confidently to herself as a proud smirk flashed across her face, "Speaking of which..."

The Xaela reached up to a nearby desk, retrieving a mirror in order to expose the Miqo'te's back.

"There. How's that look?"

The Miqo'te's eyes lit up as she took in the sun-like pattern that now adorned her shoulders. Oh, how it glowed, just like the sun, it's candescent orange hue filling the room in a dim orange blanket of light.

"Here I thought the others were exaggerating..." She whispered in delight, "It's really glowing."

"Mhmm. Your aether has been concentrated and brought up near to the surface of your skin, which is reacting with the temporary ink. Think of it like a liquid lightbulb." Asterix placed her chisel on the tray that sat beside her chair, "It should last you about a week exactly, give'r take about half a day. If it starts burning, or the glow becomes disruptive, come see me and I'll settle your skin back down."

"Can do! Thanks, Ast!" 

"No problem. Oh, and...be careful," Asterix playfully flicked the woman's arm, eliciting a hiss of pain from the woman, "The skin will be sensitive for about a day."

...

"Hey. N'ara?"

"Huh?" The woman in question, N'ara, paused, turning back to the raven-haired woman.

"If you don't mind my asking, why did you come to me for this?"

N'ara only tilted her head in response, giving the Xaela a blank stare.

"You mentioned I don't have any tattoos earlier. You aren't exactly a well-decorated canvas either." Asterix rightly pointed out, eliciting a nervous smile from the Miqo'te, "So why the sudden interest? Temporary or no, people don't usually get tattoos on a whim."

"Oh." N'ara chuckled, rubbing her arm awkwardly, "I guess I just wanted a change. Show the world I'm not just any other Miqo'te."

"That's fair." Asterix paused just long enough for her companion to feel a sense of ease before arcing her eyebrow, "...And the real reason?"

"Is it really that obvious?" The Miqo'te asked, deflated.

"I don't have to be that lunatic Hildibrand to see that you've been acting strangely."

"It's..."

"Something I should neglect to mention to the Madam?" Asterix asked carefully. She had never been one for keeping secrets from her dear friend, but there had been times in the past where one of her girls had come to her, hoping for a confidante. 

"No, no!... I've just been preparing is all. One of my friends is getting married this weekend, and she's always been a fan of tattoos like this." N'ara shrugged nonchalantly, "I don't have the courage to get a permanent one, and some of the girls mentioned you could give temporary ones, so-..."

"Well, if it starts fading before th wedding, just tell me. I'll bring the aetherical charge back to where it needs to be." Asterix offered the woman a warm smile, earning a hopeful grin in return.

"Sure thing. So, how much do I owe ya?"

"Free."

"Huh?"

"You're one of Ellie's girls, which means you're family in here. Family's free." Asterix jerked her thumb towards the door, tilting her head in the same direction, "Get going. Your friend'll be eager to see your work."

N'ara seemed in no mood to argue with the woman, only leaping to her feet as she struggled to contain the excitement bubbling violently within her.

"Thank you again!"

She rushed out of the room with a single wave, skittering past the shoji divider that separated the makeshift parlor from the rest of the brothel without delay - that was at least until she found herself impacting against another.

Another very important individual.

"Oh!" N'ara sputtered as she hastily dipped into a respectful bow, refusing to meet the amber gaze of the woman she’d run headlong into with reckless abandon, “G-good evening Madam!..."

"Is Asterix in there?" The woman in question, Madam Eliceyn Birch, idly inquired, barely acknowledging the Miqo'te's presence.

"Yes, Ma'am. She's just recently-"

"Thank you." The black-haired Hyur interrupted without a hint of hesitation. Clearly the woman was in no mood to tip-toe around with her usual formalities, “Why don't you take the rest of the night off?"

"...I apologize, I don't believe I caught that?"

"We're to close earlier than usual tonight." The Madam clarified as she began to toy with the hem of her robe, glancing past the Miqo'te into the makeshift parlor Asterix had carved out for herself, "We have a new client soliciting my services and I've a mind to keep his visit my top priority. As such, I've decided that remaining shut for the night is in our best interest."

"I understand, Madam. Should I inform the other girls?"

"Please; thank you, N'ara."

"Of course. Best of luck, Madam."

She waited for the Miqo'te to scamper off out of view before she turned to enter the parlor, her talon-like fingernails idly tapping against her robe as she hummed quietly to herself.

"Asterix."

Her voice was softer than usual. More subdued. Even so, it still retained enough of it's usual gusto to commanded her friend's attention.

"Huh? Oh, Els. Good evening," The Xaela's replied carried the same lack of enthusiasm as she went about stowing away the rest of her supplies, sparing naught more than a glance towards the Hyur.

"There will be a client arriving in just a few hours that has booked me for the entire night." Eliceyn explained simply as she strode further into the room, only halting her advance once she was no more than an arm's length away from the Au Ra.

"Alright?" Asterix hummed, continuing to put away her tools, "I can watch the place if you need me to. I’ve been meanin’ t’fix-...”

"I'm not finished."

Asterix finally found herself taking pause, rendering her full attention to the taller Hyur woman, "Okay?... What's wrong?"

"He's a noble from Ishgard." Eliceyn continued, idly plucking Asterix's tatau chisel from it's stand to half-heartedly examine it, "The man deigns himself a purveyor of only the finest courtesans, and is traveling here to sample what the East has to offer."

"Well, I might be biased, but I'd say you're one of the finest." Asterix offered the woman a reassuring smile. The sort of smile that seemed to radiate warmth, even on the darkest nights, "Don't tell me you've started doubting yourself."

"Not to worry, he's been assured as to my skill... However-..."

Her hesitation provided Asterix with all the excuse she required to speak up, her tone carrying the same anxiety that Eliceyn felt building up in her chest.

"What exactly has he commissioned you for?"

"The services of both myself and my best courtesan from sunset to sunrise." Eliceyn admitted with a sigh, locking her - suddenly quite determined - gaze on her Xaelan friend.

“Guy that knows how t'party, eh?" Asterix mumbled as her eyes widened, a wry grin appearing on her face as her mind's eye attempted to conjure that image, "And you’re worried you don’t have anyone that would live up to his standard?”

"No. I have someone like that." Eliceyn gingerly placed her hand upon the Auri's shoulder, eliciting a soft hum from the shorter woman, "...You."

Her cheeks growing seven shades darker was about the only response Asterix could muster as she stood there, watching the Madam carefully - almost as if she were attempting to scry through some elaborate ruse or conjuration.

"Do you mind?"

“I’m sorry, I'm just making sure I heard you right." Though she shook her head Asterix clearly seemed more stunned than offended, "You want me to join you as a your second courtesan?"

"Of course. You're probably the closest friend I've got in the brothel. Certainly among my girls. You've taken clients in the past, even if it was more or less freelance - not to mention every client I've seen you take on has left with a grin a mile wide on their face."

"Why me, though? Your girls would be-..."

"Frankly, you're the only one I can turn to." Eliceyn's frown only deepened as she pulled her hand away from Asterix's shoulder in favor of bringing it up to pinch her own chin, "This man - this noble - has traveled from Ishgard. He's paid a small fortune in Gil. I trust my girls, don't doubt that for even a moment, but this...this is different. Far too important to leave to chance. My brothel's reputation in Coerthas could very well depend on this man's gratification. If he suspects for even a moment that the courtesan I select to accompany me is less than exceptional, our establishment's reputation will no doubt suffer."

"Because he'll no doubt speak of his night with other interested parties, and his word may make or break our reputation in a city that's just learning to throw off the shackles of the Church." Asterix paused as she let out a shaky breath, "In other words, the word he brings back of our services may give us unfettered access to the most lucrative developing market on Hydaelyn...just as his word may shut it off forever."

"...I need someone I trust in there with me. Someone that will take pride in the service that they'll provide."

The edges of Asterix's lips began to tilt down, her eyes settling into a soft glare as she stared up at the Madam, sending a fresh wave of anxiety through the woman. 

"Like I said, they're paying a!-..."

It seemed as if a panicking Eliceyn was the extent of the Xaela's will, as her frown suddenly broke - driven away by a veritable cascade of laughter that filled the parlor like a nightingale's serenade.

Was...was she even taking this seriously?!

"Wh-... Asterix?! What?!..."

"I-I don't think I've ever seen you so flustered, Els!" Asterix replied as she finally got her laughter under control, "I'll go and get a shower'n get ready. Should I wear a Doman robe, or just those beads you showed me a few weeks ago?"

"Excuse me?"

"Our client is a noble, right?" Asterix reached up to point at the black rag that covered her hair, "Last thing we want is for me to walk in looking like I've been working in my tattoo parlor all day, right? So... Robes or beads?"

Eliceyn raised an eyebrow, "Robes. Just some loose robes."

It was only once Asterix gave the woman a confident nod that she spoke up once more, her amber eyes carefully watching Xaela.

"You're...sure about this, Asterix?"

"Course. That's what friends are for!" Asterix chuckled as she strode out of the parlor room, loudly exclaiming; "Let's show him a night he'll look back on for years."

What surprised Eliceyn most about the Ishgardian Lord was just how...'normal' he seemed.

She had been half-expecting some doddering old Elezen with more money than sense, sauntering his way into the room talking himself up as if he were the only virile man left in Kugane.

But no. What walked through the shoji, lead by one of the few girls remaining in the brothel for the night, was a rather dashing young man. Even so, he was a slave to his genetics; gracing him with the selfsame pointed features of any other Elezen and a frame lankier than a ladder, with slicked back blonde hair and striking blue eyes that easily betrayed his Ishgardian heritage. 

Blond hair, Ellie idly noted, a rarity in Doma.

What was not so rare in Doma, however, was what the young man arrived garbed in. A fine silken robe of far eastern style, no doubt purchased at some ridiculously inflated price at the markets earlier that day.

And speaking of unexpected developments...

Her eyes were drawn to the woman to sat beside her on the tatami mat, idly playing with a loose section of the covering.

All things considered, Asterix cleaned up well when she wanted to. No longer was her hair stuck in that old bandana, instead in it's usual manner, hanging down past her shoulders. Her sleeveless shirt had been replaced in favor of a tasteful eastern robe that mirrored the Madam's own, tied loosely in a clear effort to expose a tasteful yet significant portion of her torso.

Good. Nothing could go wrong, she thought as she brought herself to her feet, motioning the Xaela to follow in turn - both offering the Ishgardian man a graceful bow as they drew to their feet. 

"Greetings, Lord Fauxmá. I am Madam Eliceyn Birch, proprietor of this establishment," She motioned to Asterix casually, the woman giving a second subdued bow in response, "And this is Asterix Kearn, my dear friend and protege. She'll be assisting me tonight to ensure you leave, having had the most enjoyable experience possible."

"Oh!... Well, I didn't suspect I'd have the company of both the Madam and her personal protege. Here I thought I'd be focused only on the madam and a random courtesan. I've never been so happy to be wrong." To his credit the noble was at least humble in his response, offering back a similar bow as a grin drew to his face, "I must say, this will be a night I shan't soon forget."

"Hopefully not," Eliceyn let a soft giggle pass her lips, before motioning to a small lap-height table situated just a few feet from a rather impressive queen-bed, "Though I'm sure we're all eager to see where this night may lead, might I suggest you rest your weary bones? I'm sure you've heard tell of Doman tea."

"To put it mildly." The Noble chuckled as he strode further into the room - the accompanying girl leaving with a silent nod - plopping down onto one of the cushions lining the outside, "I've been told Doman tea is as if sipping from the gardens of Kugane." 

“You’re too kind." Eliceyn replied as she and Asterix joined the Elezen at the table, "We Domans may have the upper hand in the tea and spice trade, but you Ishgardians are known for their masterful artwork.”

“Nonsense. The Domans have fine examples of immaculate artwork. I sit before two incredible examples, even now.”

Oh, a smooth-talker, Eliceyn chuckled inwardly. No doubt perfected his craft on the gormless noble women of Ishgard.

"It's kind of you to say so," Asterix finally piped up for the first time since the Lord had arrived, "Though I'm often referred to as the artist, rather than the art. I do hope you'll enjoy the fruits of my work tonight."

She motioned to the Madam, who in turn nodded, “Yes, she’s quite adept. She’s given me a few of my tattoos.”

“Ah... So, you've studied in the art of tattooing, Miss Kearn?”

“Oh, I have. I carry what little knowledge I retained of my home with me, but most of my skill, both with a needle and a lover, I’ve learned from the Madam.” Asterix spoke with no small amount of respect - a far cry from her usual snarky self. Thank the Twelve. Still, even if her more polite demeanor was an act; it was certainly clear at the very least that her admiration for her friend was genuine, "I prefer to wield the brush, rather than lay as the canvas. Here-..."

With no small amount of care, Asterix's hands found the opening to Eliceyn's robe, pulling the garment away from the Madam's body gently as Eliceyn turned away from the man - revealing the veritable portrait that the Xaela had inscribed upon the woman's back.

"An example of my work."

"My... Your work is certainly impressive, and, I must say..." The Elezen looked damn near ready to drool at the sight of the Madam, "I've heard stories of your beauty, Madam Bitch, but to see it in person is something akin to a dream."

"With the trouble you've gone through to be here, my Lord, I can assure you that all of this is real."

Just as the Ishgardian seemed to formulate a response to the Madam's quip, the shrieking cry of a finished kettle from the other room filled the air, prompting Eliceyn to snap to attention.

“Ah, that should be the tea finished. Just a moment." Eliceyn mumbled as she hiked her robe back over her shoulders, before pulling herself to her feet. 

It was a only a few steps before she was in reach of the shoji that parted the room from the rest of the brothel, though as her hand rested against the paper surface of the shoji, she found herself turning back to her companion with a knowing smile, "Asterix, be a dear; keep our guest entertained for a moment, will you?”

“Of course, Madam," Asterix nodded obediently, before she turned to the Elezen, pushing her hair gingerly behind her horns, "Would you mind removing your robe, my Lord?"

Eliceyn was quick to offer the Elezen a respectful bow as Asterix helped him out of his robe, giving the Madam ample time to saunter out of the room, a silent breath of relief passing from her lips; though its silence would go unnoticed, as the noble let out an audible suspiration of his own.

Thank the Twelve she had been able to catch her friend before she had gone off Hydaelyn-knows-where. Sure, she wasn't exactly the ideal companion for a drawn out discussion regarding the geopolitical state of post-liberation Doma, but if you needed someone at your back for anything, she was the woman who would be there - and she would do her damnest to make sure that whatever needed to be done was done.

And if the Elezen's hoarse breaths from the other side of the thin wall were any indication, she had all but certainly tossed all of her proverbial chips in Eliceyn's corner on this particular night.

Still, she idly pondered as she retrieved the teapot from the fireplace, she would have to think about how to repay her friend for kindness. A kindness that would have been shown by very few. 

When she returned, both Elezen and Xaela had long since freed themselves of their garments, the noble's hands drifting along her lithe form to and fro, seemingly without a care in the world, leaving the Xaela to wipe her mouth with the back of her hand as she spared a reassuring nod to the Madam that conveyed a clear message.

'If the man had been possessed of even the slightest hesitation before, that hesitation had long perished.'

"I see my friend is to your linking, my Lord?"

"Without a doubt Madam." The noble seemed all to eager to express that sentiment with more than just words, pulling the shorter woman into a heated kiss, a kiss which was eagerly reciprocated for the fleeting moments it lasted, "She has been so kind as to offer me a taste of her talents; and yet that only stokes the flame of desire I feel for this night to come."

Eliceyn chuckled, gently setting the tea pot on the table, "I see... I'm glad that you approve."

The room was nearly as silent as the Madam went about pulling her garments away. There was hardly any use for them now, especially given that her companions had found it fit to dismiss the thought of clothing so early into the night.

“Tell me, Madam, do you receive many visitors from Ishgard?” The noble asked as he watched - with no small amount of lust in his gaze - Eliceyn disrobe, a smile softening his otherwise rigid jawline.

"Oh, no. Though we hope to change that in the near future," Eliceyn's arms traveled down her front, separating the final binding her robe - which soon found itself laying uselessly upon the floor, "The citizens of Ishgard may not be a common sight in these lands, but you can rest assured that you'll leave these chambers as happy as any Doman."

"Speaking of which, mayhaps its time to experience this Doman hospitality I've heard so much about." 

"In that case, may I interest you in a massage, my Lord?" Eliceyn gestured towards the bed, her mouth tilting to a smirk, "T'would be a tragedy for a muscle in your hips to disobey you on the eleventh hour."

"A massage? I would hope from you, Madam." He brought himself to his full height, unperturbed by his lack of dress as he glanced back at the bed laying in the middle of the room, "Your protege has welcomed me quite spectacularly, but her presence may wait until the main event. I've booked not one courtesan this evening, but two."

Eliceyn offered the man a single nod, turning to the Xaela, who lounged patiently upon the tatami, "Why don't you take some tea, Asterix?"

"Of course, Madam. Say the word and I'll join you." Asterix replied with a small bow of her head, pulling herself to her feet to saunter over to the teapot.

It was barely three strides to the bed, which had been immaculately made by the two women only moments before the Lord had arrived. Or at least, it had been made immaculately after Eliceyn had relegated Asterix to cushion placement after a good 10 minutes and 4 failed attempts at fixing up the poor bed.

Quite honestly, it made her worry for the possible state of the Xaela's bed at home.

"Lay here," Eliceyn instructed as she gestured towards the bed; an instruction that was swiftly followed as the man lay down upon his stomach, letting his eyes drift shut as he waited for the Madam's work to begin.

And waited...

And waited...

And just as if it seemed as if her touch would never come, any budding inquiries were rightly silenced as the noble felt the unmistakable sensation of the Madam's hands against his back, kneading the stiff muscles with practiced precision. It seemed as if by magic that she worked, casting away a weeks worth of travel and stress with a mere touch, all as she whispered softly into his ear, melting away whatever ache - physical or mental - that may have otherwise escaped her notice.

It was a quiet few minutes, the only sounds filtering through the room the occasional groan of satisfaction from the Elezen as the Madam methodically massaged away every knot from his form. Though eventually that would come to an end as Eliceyn pulled away from the man, giving him ample room to rise back to his feet - no doubt feeling quite a bit lighter than he had even minutes before.

"I believe it's time, wouldn't you agree Madam." The noble surmised as the Madam made her way onto the bed, sitting against the side presses against the wall as her attention turned to her friend, idly sipping away at a small cup of the prepared tea.

"I would agree wholeheartedly, my Lord. Asterix," Eliceyn called over to her companion, prompting the shorter woman to rise to her feet, "I assume you've no qualms to receiving our guest first?"

"None, Madam." Asterix replied as she made her own way over to the bed, wordlessly laying herself upon the once immaculate sheets- resting her head and shoulders on the Madam's lap.

"Come, experience the forbidden pleasures of the East for yourself, Ishgardian." Eliceyn whispered as her pale hands trailed down her scaled companion's form, parting her thighs. A soft smile crawled onto the Madam's face as she watched the Elezen's eager gaze quickly fell to it's inevitable destination, "You shan't leave disappointed."

"No," His voice was hoarse, though his advance smooth as his hands joined the Madam's upon the Xaela's pale thighs, "I don't believe I will."

The next few hours were naught but a miasma of frantic lust. Neither women nor noble seemed all to eager for the sun to rise, their sense lost in a tangle of limbs and sheets. Not an inch of skin left unexplored, not a desire left unfulfilled. 

Eventually though, time would march ever forward, and the sun would peak over the crest of the horizon, signaling the end of what had easily become a sleepless night for the trio.

Still, a sleepless night just meant that she and Asterix still had time to get a drink before they retired, right? Right. That's how that worked; Twelve be damned if anyone dared to tell her differently.

"He certainly was spirited." Eliceyn mumbled as she nursed a small glass of wine, glancing over to her friend, who was happily doing the same to a drink of her own.

"Spirited? If you'd told me having my tail in his face dug up repressed traumas about the Dragonsong War, I'd completely believe you." Asterix chuckled, tracing the rim of her glass with her finger, "Remind me to get hazard pay next time."

"Speaking of pay-..." Eliceyn trailed off, hesitating until Asterix drew her gaze towards her friend, "Given the nature of the client, I can wave the usual 10% brothel expense. Is that fair?"

"Nah." Asterix answered simply, sipping her wine.

"No? How much is fair then? 60% of the pay?" Eliceyn arced a brow. Sure, the true prize of the night had hardly been the money, but Asterix never was much interested in profit-...

"I don't want money, Els," Asterix clarified rolled her eyes, letting a grin slip onto her face, "I didn't do it for money. You needed help, and you're my friend. That's all there is to it."

Eliceyn chuckled. She knew exactly what Asterix was playing at now, "That's all, huh? So there's nothing?-..."

"Well..."

Uh huh. Like clockwork.

"...I'll bring him in tomorrow." She replied, eliciting a small squeak of glee from the Xaela, who buried herself with silently fist-bumping the air like an overly-excited child, "I'm sure he'll be thrilled to see you again."

"Yes!..."

"So... Can I count on you in the future?" Eliceyn grinned, waiting for Asterix to settle herself before she continued, "If a situation like this comes up again, I mean."

Her companion's smile foretold of her reply before a word could even leave her lips.

"Course! That's what friends are for!"

[qveensbury]

ch 5: wouldn’t it be nice

summary: another movie night + pining + fluff. a college au iwaizumi x reader fic.

AO3  | just a little oh a little bit | ko-fi

[iwaizumi: are you coming to movie night?]

[you: yes]

[iwaizumi: good]

“What are you smiling about?”

You found Kaede and Noa staring at you.

“Nothing,” you put your phone away.

“I hope you’re not one of those girls who forgets her friends while she’s dating.” Noa crossed her arms.

Heat climbed over your face. “It’s not like that.”

“Yet,” Kaede added.

“Hey!”

“C’mon, ____. You like him,” Noa made an arc with her finger.

You shushed her, “Cut it out.”

“Are you going to confess?” She looked at you.

“We’re not high schoolers. We’re adults.”

“So, what adults don’t confess? They just magically end up in relationships?” Kaede pressed.

You huffed, crossing your arms. “Can’t it all happen on my terms?”

Kaede smiled while Noa shook her head ‘no.’

“As long as you do something.”

The three of you got off the bus near Matsukawa’s apartment and walked the rest of the way.

“Did you invite Sawamura, Kaede?“

“He said he’s got an exam he needs to study for.” She shivered, “It’s so cold.”

“And it’ll only get colder!” Noa mock shouted.

You were happy your friends moved on from the topic of you and Iwaizumi.

You did like him.

You texted him fairly regularly. And saw him after games.

He was starting to be real. Not your version of Iwaizumi: the stoic wing spiker on the men’s volleyball team. He was gaining more dimension the more you got to know him.

You liked him. And it thrilled and terrified you. This wasn’t a high school crush. This was taking shape. It was building walls.

You liked him.

His smile.

How safe you felt when he stood next to you.

His voice.

The way he said your name.

His determination.

All of that didn’t really matter if he didn’t like you back.

“Welcome ladies!” Oikawa opened the door for you.

“Oikawa, let the girls in.”

“Yea, move!” Noa shouldered her way in.

Holding his chest where Noa struck him, Oikawa moved aside so you and Kaede could enter the apartment.

Your heart picked up a little speed when you saw Iwaizumi.

“Hey.”

“Hey.” He looked over you. “Hey, Miki.”

“Hello, Iwaizumi-kun.”

“Mikichi!”

Kaede put her hands on her hips. “Matsukawa we’ve been in the same city for months and you never tried to see me. Don’t ‘Mikichi’ me,” she scolded in contrast to the smile on her face. “You are so tall! Matsukawa!”

“How are you the same height?”

“Shut up! Don’t make me headbutt you.”

Matsukawa laughed and Kaede snorted before joining him. The lack of explanation led you to conclude it was an inside joke.

Throwing an arm around her shoulders, Matsukawa led Kaede into the apartment.

Oikawa ruffled your hair before following them.

The silence sprung up, delicately like foam taking its shape.

“So, is it just the four of you and the three of us?”  

“Yea. Matsun is busy with exams so it’s just a Ghibli movie he likes.”

You hummed. “Sounds like fun.”

“Matsun has seen them all a million times.” Iwaizumi rolled his eyes. “He’d recite lines randomly and it was so confusing at first.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“I’m telling you the truth.”

You smirked. “No way.”

“He’ll probably quote the movie as its playing.”

Giggles rose in response to the mental image.

“I was gonna grab the drinks I brought if you want to bring your snacks.”

You looked at the bag in your hand. “Sure.”

The hallway wasn’t truly big enough for both of you to walk side by side. But Iwaizumi slowed down for you. You shoulder kept brushing his arm.

“Isn’t it weird we’re almost done with our first semester?”

“Yea.” Iwaizumi gestured for you to enter the kitchen first.

“Do you think you’re gonna stay in the engineering department?” You took off your coat and put it on one of the chairs.

“Hmm,” Iwaizumi pulled down cups for the drinks. “We’ll see after this semester’s grades. It wouldn’t be too hard to transfer over and graduate on time.”

“Good luck! I know you can do it.”

He smiled. “Do you know what you’ll major in?“

“I was thinking of art history. I have a professor who could help me get museum internships.”

“That sounds amazing.”

“It is.”

“Hey, um, ____.”

“Yea?”

“Do you two need help bringing snacks?” Kaede asked.

“Hmm, what do you think Iwaizumi?”

“That would be helpful. Here Miki.”

She accepted the cups. “Got it. I still can’t believe you know Matsukawa. It’s so nice to see my friends in one place. Oh! ____, we should host something next semester.”

“Yea! That sounds great.”

Kaede nodded as she left the kitchen.

Iwaizumi opened the fridge and grabbed two bottles. “Lead the way,” he gestured for you to go, not meeting your eyes.

Everyone congregated around the kotatsu. You and Iwaizumi added your contributions to the snacks assembled.

Accepting the can from Noa, you glanced at the open loveseat and took a step towards it. Your eyes jumped back to Iwaizumi who was listening to Oikawa.

There was the option of asking him to sit next to you. Or, sitting next to Kaede or Noa.

But sitting next to Iwaizumi would be your first choice.

You sat on it.

All you had to do now was make eye contact. So, you glanced at him from time to time, alternating between looking at him and your cell phone.

From across the room, you finally caught his eyes. The warm expression on his face was different, new.

You could barely keep the smile off your face.

He inclined his head to this left (your right) in the direction of the empty seat next to you.

You nodded, placing a hand on the cushion.

He smiled, walking over to sit next to you and taking a seat after you moved your hand.

The opening notes of the score cut through what little conversation was left.

“Enough. Time for film.” Matsukawa put the remote on the TV stand before taking a seat next to Hanamaki.

Spirited Away was a movie you’d seen before, released when you were in elementary school. It still was just as magical for you as an adult.

When Chihiro bathed the river spirit, your mind began to wander. It seemed like Iwaizumi had something he wanted to say to you in the kitchen.

I wonder what it was.  You placed your hand on the cushion.

Iwaizumi’s hand brushed yours.

Your first instinct was to bring your hand back to your lap. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Iwaizumi jolt, crossing his arms.

Wait.

Was he trying to hold your hand?

Because that would be…

You took a deep breath.

 Why do I keep screwing things up?

Your shoulders fell. The condensation on your drink followed your finger as you drew abstract shapes on your drink.

I would really like to hold Iwaizumi’s hand. You twisted your mouth.

Chihiro mustered her courage to climb a long stairway.

 What if he thinks I don’t want to hold his hand?

You put your hand back where it was and sent signals hoping he’d understand.

Time weaved between the scenes. You tried to be as still as possible.

 What if Iwaizumi wasn’t trying to hold your hand?

A weight settled in the pit of your stomach. Slowly, you brought your hand back into your lap before wrapping it around your drink. The fizz from your soda gave you a small distraction from the dread washing over you.

“Once you meet someone you never really forget them.”

The dialogue from the movie parroted Matsukawa.

“Ugh, Mattsun! Please,” Oikawa whined.

You giggled.

Iwaizumi gently bumped his shoulder against yours. Returning the touch, you pressed back against him.

Before you could stop yourself, you glanced at him and saw he was smiling. The light from the screen giving off a little light.

It would be better if Iwaizumi liked you back but these moments were worth cherishing regardless.

Dropping your shoulders, you settled back into the chair. Your hand settled beside you.

You were starting to tug on one of the couch’s loose strings when Iwaizumi’s hand landed on yours.

Fire crept up your cheeks.

You turned your hand—

He pulled back.

—over to hold his hand properly.

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw him looking at you out of the corner of his eye.

You smiled.

His thumb brushed your palm.

Tingles shot up your arm.

You squeezed his hand trying to focus on the movie.

You took a big inhale and then a drink to hide your smile.

Chihiro was getting in the car.

The movie was almost over.

Oh.

Pressing your back into the couch, you sighed.

Iwaizumi bumped his shoulder into yours.

You scrunched your shoulders up. Couldn’t the movie last longer? You rested your head against him for a moment.

He squeezed your hand.

Glancing at him, you pouted.

He chuckled.

“What’s so funny?” Oikawa asked.

Someone turned the light on.

You both released each other’s hands.

The pattering of your heart vibrated through your arm and your arm shook as you tried to casually take a drink.

“You couldn’t finish that in an hour and a half?” Noa raised an eyebrow.

You raised an eyebrow back at her. You held the can with both hands to stabilize it.

Kaede materialized with a trash bag. “Clean up!”

Iwaizumi stood up to help and you followed him with your eyes over your can.

 When did they finish the snacks?

Finishing your drink, you stood up to help clean. “I don’t remember the last time I watched Spirited Away.”

“It helps me with exam stress,” Matsukawa replied.

Hanamaki hissed, “Don’t say that word? We’re in a state of post-Ghibli bliss.”

“How are you all getting home? It’s kinda late,” Matsukawa asked Kaede.

“The bus. Noa is sleeping over so we should be fine.” Kaede fastened the bag in her hands. “I think that’s everything.”

“Leave the bag you should head out.”

Noa pulled up the public transportation app. “We have just enough time to walk to the bus stop.”

“Lemme walk you guys to the stop.” Iwaizumi looked from you to Kaede.

“As long as you don’t slow us down,” Noa threw over her shoulder.

You retrieved your coat form the kitchen before meeting everyone by the entrance.

“Wow Iwaizumi, so chivalrous~,” Oikawa said.

“We should go. Thanks, Matsun!” Noa opened the door.

“Good night.”

The call and response circled the small hallway.

Noa led the way descending the stairs followed by Kaede, you, and Iwaizumi. Kaede walked in step with Noa.

“You don’t have to double-check that we’re going in the right direction. Doesn’t any of this look familiar?”

“Not at all.”

“Geez, Kaede. What would you do without modern technology?”

You giggled. Sifting for something to say to Iwaizumi. The desert of your mind was proving not to be fruitful.

Something brushed the back of your hand and you stilled. You turned to Iwaizumi.

He extended his hand to you.

And, you placed your hand in his.

The second time was just as nice as the first.

You wouldn’t mind getting lost to the bus stop.

A/N: title from Wouldn’t It Be Nice by the Beach Boys. alt. title: Your Hand in My Hand So Still and Discrete

[corazonstealer]

Wanted - Eustass Kid x Reader [part 1]

Ahhh I feel like it’s been forever since I’ve last posted so let me make it up to y’all !

Read beneath the cut  ♡

Screaming at the lifeless images repeating and subsequently scratching bold red marks over it filled your life for the past several hours. Diggings harder and harder with the marker, it was only a guessing game of which the paper or the pen would fail first. The paper –predictably once again.

A large hole ripped the darkened sheet putting a pause to your madness, if only for a moment. Tossing it away to pile upon the ever-growing mountain, a new one soon followed and inevitably, the process would begin anew.

Repeating curses to his stupid broad grin began to sound like an incantation. Muttered beneath your breath, the words melted together into an incoherent string. A new language possibly? It didn’t matter as long as the worst was wished upon him.

“Shit.” You didn’t realize when the paper gave way this time.

Brightly marking the wooden table, it would be cleaned another time. With more pressing matters at hand, the page was quickly discarded and forgotten into the pile of gathering trash just like the others.

Reaching for the next, your hand laid empty. Once a high stack within your reach, you grasped at nothing but the air.

Finally taking a solid deep breath, it was the longest pause taken since your frantic bender began. Over taken by the gnawing voice inside, you simply couldn’t stop until it was all over. Bracing yourself to see the result, you took cautious peeks around.

Torn to shreds, your once tight collection lay carelessly upon the floor. Countless hours spent, it was all for nothing. Meticulously collected to protect him, guilt sank your stomach. How could you do this?

As nausea hit in a painful wave, you laid your head upon the table trying to gather yourself.

“Damnit, you’re a Marine, get it together,” you huffed angrily at yourself. Weakness was not an option, but you feared that it was far too late.

Picking up your head, you were faced with the last untouched sheet. The final wanted poster pinned upon the cork board, in between unfinished ship blueprints, was the only one left untouched.

“Eustass ‘Captain’ Kid,” you ran your fingers over his name as you read it aloud over and over. Gently caressing his face, your hand began to shake. Surging excitement lasted for just a brief moment before anger over took any rosy thoughts.

Superficially clawing at the image, you ultimately couldn’t muster the courage to tear it down. Laying your head down once more, anger shifted onto yourself.

Clearing his throat, he softly knocked upon the open door. Initially hesitating after witnessing a bit of your moment, the blond-haired man did so as he was directed.

“[Name]?”

You quickly bounced up to your feet. The voice, heard often over the past few months, could only belong to one.

“What did you hear?” You demanded to know as you cleared your wild hair to face the man who always was covered.

“Nothing that I could understand,” although a merciless pirate, he was far too honest, always.

Your overactive nerves calmed a bit. The tight subconscious grip upon the desk loosened as you released. “Sorry, can I help you?” You tried to divert, hoping that no question about your behavior would be raised.

Despite a wondering look surely present behind a dark mask, he chose to direct the simple message that he was initially sent for. “Kid wants you to come over.”

“Absolutely not.” You sternly replied without a second to think about it.

A moment of deafening silence wafted over after your response. Usually one to rush over on his call, it was unexpected to say the least.

Mulling over your firm rejecting words, he was unsure of what to tell Kid.

Although both of you knew that a rejection would never stop him. You’d soon have to face him whether you’d like it or not. Barging in after destroying everything and all to be unfortunately in his path, he’d drag you out against his will.

You deeply sighed, knowing that this would be a bad option for all involved.

“What did he mess up now?” Despite mentally agreeing to go, you wanted him to relay the annoyance clearly labeled upon your face. Arms crossed and a sour look, all would be recalled to Kid. Although he wouldn’t care, it was best not to fully give into him.

Despite the man’s covered face, you could easily read the dreaded look of ‘everything.’

You ground your teeth, chewing upon wanted cursing words before sighing. “I’ll be there soon,” you reluctantly gave up. Harshly rubbing your pulsating temples as it was the last thing that you wished to currently do.

He nodded, slightly relieved as Kid would not run a muck unnecessarily. “I’ll let him know.”

Caught up in focusing your jittery figure, he caught first glance at the unusual mess. In the time that he knew you, one thing was clear. Cleanliness was of high priority often getting on the crew’s case at any small spilled mess.

“What’s this?” He simply couldn’t leave without an answer.

As he tried to reach over, you frantically jumped in between. Showing not an ounce of fear, the possibility of being discovered was more fearsome than the man infamously known as ‘The Massacre Soldier.’

“J-Just woman things, you wouldn’t understand,” you quickly spit out the first excuse to come to mind. A vague excuse good enough for your male dock co-workers, hopefully it would be enough for him as well.

Quickly accepting it without further question, he backed up. Raising his hands innocently up, he didn’t want to be further involved. “I’ll let Kid know,” he reiterated as he stepped out.

“What the hell did you fuck up now Kid?!” you harshly yelled a loud as you boarded his ship. Hours after loosely promising, you forcefully dragged yourself aboard lazily lugging along your tools.

He appeared not a moment after appearing from behind the larger center pillar. Irritation loudly bouncing his brow-less structure to your late brash approach. “You’re lucky that you came, I was getting ready to go get you.” A sadistic grin raised his expression ever so slightly as he pondered on the sight.

Words meant to strike fear, they only made your heart skip a beat. He was going to have you no matter what. Shaking off the bubbling feelings, you tried to hold a strong exterior.

“Yeah yeah, what’s wrong?” you tried to look away from him as you brushed him off not giving him the answer that he wanted.

He scoffed, sharply whispering to catch your diverted attention. “Over there,” he hitched a thumb back behind him to point out the broken railing. Be it the result of a drunken scuffle or done so on purpose, he wasn’t going to stand around and explain.

You sighed as you looked at the mistreated split wood. Chunks of the tinted timber scattered upon deck and surly some long gone sitting at the bottom of the sea. His pattern was all too predictable as he had ruined something else again.

“I’ll be done, soon,” you emphasized as you spoke beneath your breath in a quick pass past him. Keeping your head down, you avertedly made no eye contact with him. The quicker that you’d be done, the quicker that you could leave you repeated.

Undisturbed for several minutes, you were surprisingly allowed to work in peace. A few steps here and there didn’t dare to disturb. The entire ship felt heavy, as if all could feel your uneasy woes. Simply looking to finishing, you’d be home soon.

Unfortunately, the calm didn’t last for long. Catching glimpses of the hovering man, he couldn’t stay away for long. A feathered coat outlined a dark shadow, he couldn’t possibly hide; it wasn’t like he wanted to anyways.

The definition of shame was unbeknownst to him as he tried to reach for your pert bottom. Bent over hard at work and perfect for his picking, he couldn’t resist.

You quickly jolted upwards, pushing his hand down with the leveler before he could get his desired handful. “Don’t you dare, unless you want to lose you other hand,” you scowled at him firmly standing your ground.

The crew abruptly paused in their steps to the sound of the brewing scuffle. Standing around to witness, they nervously awaited for their Captain’s response to being out right rejected.

Boiling a rumbling laughter, he broke the growing silence. Taking hold of your thin wrist, he pulled you up to him cackling in your face. “Those are some big words coming from someone I’ve heard begging for more.”

The crew looked around, whispers and looks exchanged before they all agreed on one. Erupting in laughter, they followed Kid’s bout joining in on the fun at your expense.

Nothing but the crude men’s laughter filled the area. Unable to clearly think, your fists tightly balled to their non-stop track. Your knuckles whitened, shaking with rushing anger before ultimately relaxing as your attitude shifted.

No words to combat but a simple chuckle unexpectedly passed your lips. Slowly growing joining in, no one was left out.

Shifting concerned looks, the crowd slowly stopped. Unsure of what was occurring, all including Kid, silently waited for a reason.

Wiping the collecting tears from your eyes, you shook your head. “Funny, because I’ve heard the same from you,” you didn’t back down. Without skipping a beat, his own mix of humiliation was tossed back at him.

Growing wide-eyed, the crew quickly dispersed needing no second word. Final prayers for your safety, they couldn’t stay and watch the aftermath that was to unfold.

His once tight grip upon your wrist loosened. Finally set free, you dusted yourself off to continue. No care for his silence as you were just relieved that he had finally shut up.

“Now if you’ll excuse me,” you angrily huffed as you walked away ignoring the silence.

The clinking heels of your boots upon deck stepping away drowned out as a familiar sound rang from behind.

You paused in your steps, a mere moment to think about it the source –knuckles cracking.

“What—”

 The past few hours were a hazy blur. Lost in the fog of non-concrete memories, you were unsure of what was the strange feeling brewing.

The place reeked of old liquor, the blankets were scratchy, and the water droplets of an almost closed faucet grew quickly annoying. You tossed over hoping that it was all just your imagination.

“Turn that off,” you sleepily muttered to no one in particular hoping that every bit would just go away.

Alerted from your voice, the unknown body nearby scuttered around. Jumping up from their seat, the voice heard faint from outside of the room signaling that it wasn’t just in your mind.

‘Captain…’

‘Awake…’

You managed to catch a few words here and there. As much as you wanted to rush up, your body wouldn’t allow. Slowly shaking awake, you sat up in the small space allowed to rub your eyes to the new area.

Yet before you could be left for too long to question, a familiar body cautiously stepped in. Barking at the one tasked to watch over to leave, the door shut behind sealing you both inside.

The once cemented snarky look upon his face replaced by a newfound expression –concern?

“Kid?” You squinted trying to make sure that you were truly witnessing it.

He didn’t allow you to further speak. Cupped tightly into his body, you were left speechless. The reason for his tender touch didn’t matter. Solely the warmth of his arms wrapped around you and his lips upon your forehead, you tried to savor the moment.

A few things he angrily murmured, allowing you to make sure that it was truly him. Unable to go long without berating, at least somethings made some sense.

Despite his ill words causing a light tickle upon your skin, an overwhelming wave of sleepiness weighed you down. Struggling to remain awake for any longer, you fell into him.

He tried to shake you awake. Receiving a few frustrated groans as a sign of life, he returned you back into his waiting arms.

Only when alone and you surly asleep, he floated by a few apologies. Anguish and relief lining his vice to your safety as he squeezed tighter as if his errors would absolve.

Unknown to his own strength, his hold became uncomfortable. Although he meant well, at least you thought, he spurred you from your desired sleep. You tried to move, even just an inch, he wouldn’t allow. “Ki—”

“I love you…”

[thornsuntitledtrash]

old art of mine, been redoing stuff and stuff. I’ll post some of the old stuff with the new stuff. I have saved drawings all over my room and computer.

Surface life

    Image 1; Red walked into his favorite bar for a much needed drink and finds a new face. Sitting on the bar stole was a woman, drinking shots left and right. She pause for a moment. pulls out a hand full of crushed $20′s and slams them on the bar table.

“6 more, please and thank you.” a little loader then what was intended. Chillby turned his head.

Chillby look at her and sighed, “....As I said before, I cant leave so many drinks on the bar top....but i will take your money. ”Chillby smiled and took the money and began making her drink.

“ugh fine, just easier to line them up and drink it with out waiting for the next one.” She said in a drunk whisper. She lean back a bit and closed her eyes.

Red sat down on his stole. The bar was slow tonight, a few customers here and there. Even a few humans in the far back table. Which is rare, but if they have the cash Chillby will gladly take it. As long as their not starting trouble. This being a monster bar and all. You get the Dumbest humans making the Stupidest  comments. Some raciest some borderline looking for a fight.

Chillby walks by and passes the woman her drink and walks up to Red, giving him his mustered without even asking.

“Hehe Thanks Chillby, been just die-en for a drink.” Red smiles and starts to drink. He hears a small snort from the woman two seats across from him. Her free hand holding her face head turned away, blocking his view of her. Chillby saying nothing walks off to attended to other customers. Clearly not in the mood tonight. Red smiles. He will leave Chillby be for now. He found a new distraction for the night.

He eyed the woman, dirty blond hair. She was a little on the short side. 5′2 or 5′3 maybe, but every human is short compared to him. She had on a gray button top with no sleeves, and a large magenta colored sweater that started at her upper arms going well over her hands and ending along her hips. To him it looked like on of those sweater dresses. Or it could be on XXXL sweater, either way she looked good. Her legs were long and curvy, covered in black knee high socks.  Red whistled to himself. ‘Nice’. He is a leg man, and those are some nice legs. Head still turned away from him but now looking at her drink. He seen a few good looking human woman. Though none would give him the time of day. Which is no skin off his nose. He-he!. But this Chick looked different, body wise.  She gave off the feeling, ‘ I don’t care. Leave me to my drink. Don’t bother me. ’ type of feeling. Not in a real rude way either. Also there was something about her. Something that he couldn’t put his finger on about her. She seem different from the humans across the bar. If anything she seem more similar to Monsters then human.

Come to think about it’s not the first time he had this same feel before with a human. Walking down the street he would past someone and not really paying much attention think it was a Monster but then turn and see a human. He shrugged it off and go about his way. Another time would be when he and Boss was shopping in a isle of can goods there was a spill. Chill Sauce, I think. Boss yelled that there was filth in the Isle. 3 seconds we both felt something, magic in the air. Boss thought it was an attack and was preparing his own attack so was he. We turned to see a human Employee run over and pause she said, “what spill?”. Boss pointed to where the spill was and there was none. The next Isle over someone yell back, ”Sorry!”.... but how did they get to the spill past us to the next Isle over?. We went to the next Isle and saw two humans talking, a Man scolding a child about being more careful when holding glass jars. Boss walked off making a comment on at least these humans have cleaning standers. Red followed thinking nothing of it after that.

Taking a big gulp of is mustered, Red looked at the woman finishing off her 2 out of 3 colorful shots. taping the last 1 with her finger. He decided. he wanted her attention. He didn’t know why. Maybe to see if her face matches the body he was admiring from two seats over. Getting up he walked over and sat down in the stole next to her. She somewhat laugh at the not intended pun earlier. Maybe that will get her attention now.

“Hey, haven’t see ya here before. I would buy you a drink but it looks like ya got it. Looks like 2 down and 4 to go.” Red says finishing the rest of mustered. She turned her head and looked at Red. ”Sorry had to ‘mustered’ up the courage to ask.” Hmm not bad. Not bad at all. Round face, full pink lips, pale skin, and her eyes. Icy blue eyes with a hint of violet. Her eyes looked relaxed could be drunk.

“..... Ha-ha, 6 down and 4 more to go yes. 1 more if your still interested in buying me a drink.” Maybe not drunk. She didn’t seem drunk if anything, just tipsy.

This went on for about 30 minutes. Puns flying and a little flirting here and there. Red had down 4 mustered bottles and she finished off her 4. He got her the drink he promised. Red found he was have a good time. She appeared to be have a good time as well. At some point they were interrupted by the humans at the table. Making rude comments about Monsters and Magic.

“ Hey Monster Stick to your own Kind.” one of human males yell out. His face clearly disgusted at there display. Which to be far was just talking. Nothing more.

Red was getting ready to tell him to shove it but was cut off. “I don’t think he should he has been great company. Plus if u have a issue here’s a tissue.” The woman he had been talking to tossed a balled up tissue there way. The turn back to Red as if nothing happened. “By the way you never introduce yourself.” she said to Red with a laid back smile. She was right I never did. Lets  fix that. he he.

“ Ha!, your right. The name Sans, Sans the Skeleton but you sweetheart can call me Red.” Smiling Wide, Red put out his hand for a handshake. Her hand held his. He noted that her hands were small and warm. Cute.

“ Well Red nice to finally know the name of the person i have been talking to for half an hour. My name is -”

“ Hey what’s your problem you into Monsters or some shit!.” The same human called out. “ Bet she is one of those types. yea? Like’s the danger thrill right!” Getting everyone attention in the bar. though there was only just them, Red and her at the bar and a 2 humans at a both by the door and a Monster bear looking out the window from his seat.Oh and Chillby not looking happy. “ If you looking for fun tonight just come on over. We will give you what your looking for.” He pulled up his shirt. showing off his broad chest. His Buddy's cheered.

“ Your safe will use. We have what you need, Skin for one!.” the male to his right call out show off this arms. The other was cheering his friends on recording with his phone. All 3 looked looked to be in there 20ish. All of them Drunk.

“Pf-ft hah hah haa!, who comes to a monster bar and is racist and ignorant of the people around them.” She turns her head to them looking bored. Her smile gone and eyes narrowed. “ You know what......there is a lesson here. Its people like you who get on my nerves. You say stupid things to get a rise out people. Thinking that if they do something I got friends, that got my back.” She sipped her drink and leaned on her other elbow. “ Whats wrong? can’t hold your own? Have to show how ‘manly’ you are by insulting others? or Show off what ‘little’ you have?” Clearly not interested in the their display. “if anything it’s cowardly. and I hate cowards.”

Red was a little taken a back. Chillby was just about to walk over and most likely throw them out. When there was a feeling of magic in the air like an magic attack was readying, but it was off it felt more like magic tension or-

“Chicken Shit...” She said pointing a finger at the first offender who made the first rude comment who started this. Magic came from her finger. Orange and Purple magic shot from her finger out it to the human male. There was a flash then a poof. In his place was a....

“..........bak bak”

“Dude! What the Fuk!!” said his buddy to the left

“ He’s a Chicken!!, A fuckin Chicken!!!. The other said dropping his phone.

Chillby, Sans, The Bear Monster and the other 2 Humans starred eyes and eyes light wide. Some Shocked that a now chicken is where a man once stood.

“ Not a chicken really but a rooster. I was going for Chicken ‘Shit’ but I’m a little more then tipsy. But I got results.” She got up and went to the door after downing the her last drink.

“Hey! What the fuck lesson is there to learn.!. Your braking the law using magic us normal Humans. Fucking Mages!” He scream looking at his now chicken friend.

“....Oh right the lesson. Um mm, don’t mess with People and keep your opinion to yourself. Plus this is a magic zone. Where I can use magic. Anyway he will change back in few.” She made it to the door then paused. “ Almost forgot.” She turned to Red and smiled and said, “ The names Yvette.” She left.

Tada!!! old art with story. The next image is just trying out faces for the sans and pap’s. The other image will have a story later on. Ill post it next maybe.....^w^/ Hope my spelling and storytelling is understandable.

[baroquefaolchu]

He sits alone in the dead of night at his desk, scratching away with his quill on the parchment. He does not write with speed, but with purpose. A steady scratching, a tap here and there to punctuate each sentance. His hand cramps but he does not slow. The sky is clouded over, the barest light of the moon can be seen glowing through. But his source of light is his lone candle. Freshly lit, though his work nearly finished. The work too important to complete in the dark. And too urgent is the need to wait till morning light. A few minutes more and he is finished. He sets down his quill, his ink jar nearly empty. Very carefully it is read over in the light. Caring not to smudge the still damp ink. After a time he sets it down and lets out a sigh, massaging his aching hand and rubbing his dried eyes.

"its done" he says, to the air around him. It answers back with its accepting silence. He stands with a groan, stretching his ached back. He is not yet a old man, but he feels the pains of age creeping in now more than ever. He carefully puts away his implements careful around the parchment. When sure the ink has dried and words set firmly in the page he rolls up his work tenderly and seals it away for passage. It is not a long walk to the commons house but he does not wish to take any chances. Safely tucked and sealed away, he prepares himself for sleep. There are not as many hours left in the night as he had wished but he will take what is left for him.

Freshed for sleep he lays in his empty bed. Head aching, eyes tired, but sleep does not find him quickly. He thinks back to his journey here, to this time, to this event. All the events that lead to this moment. And worst of all, all the lives left behind to reach this point. A tear creeps out his closed eye that he quickly wipes lest the air sees and chides him. A final prayer he murmurs before drifting off to sleep with his sorrow.

"Rest well my brothers, you were not forgotten"

With that his conscious disapears to the astral and his body left to idle.

The world beats but for a moment and a voice calls his distant mind from the darkness.

"EZRA!"

With a start his eyes open and bolts up, looking around for the source. Scanning the room he sees nothing be the capricious air at first. A second passes, another, fearing his childishness he musters the courage to speak.

"is someone there?..."

"EZRA! DO YOU BLIND YOURSELF WITH MINE IMAGE NOW?"

He turns toward the window where the sound echoed, what he took for the dark glow of the moon he now sees the visage of the boy, nay the man he once knew as Henry. A blue pale light coming from him, a clear specter. And a container for the pained guilt now flooding into him.

"h-henry... why ar-re you here? now? you-you..."

"Died? why yes Ezra i DID pass. long ago now it seems. Left bleeding out on the steps of the church of our revolution. Dead and gone, and rotted away I am now to nothing but bone and hair. And yet here you are, living and breathing. Sleeping so peaceful. Tell me Ezra why are you not down in the MUD and the DIRT. ROTTING WITH YOUR BROTHERS AND ME?!?!

the specter rose as he spoke growing closer and louder as he reached the end of his words. the air heaved around him with the effort to hold back his rage and force.

Ezra, shooken, seemed to find a spark within himself, if for a moment.

"you would rather me dead? they had cannons and guns and men further than the city walls and you would have asked me to stay? to die with you? Do you think i turned tail at the first sign of trouble? i held my post, i stayed to the eastern wall. but the north and the west fell! the orders would have us fall back to the city center to be trapped like rats and die like fleas! we lost, with no hope to be had, with hardly a drop of blood from them. you would have me stay to watch you die in my arms?

Ezra having found his voice had rose to his feet. He did not approach the specter but instead faced it. eyes determined.

"would you deny me that comfort Ezra? is that such a hard boon to grant? to have the last feeling i have on this earth be the embrace of a beloved friend instead of the cold rotting from my heart to every inch of my body. Is that such a chore?" The specter nearly wept, the air seemingly sucked away at his heat but a moment before.

"you would ask me to watch you die in my arms with your blood on my hands. to scar your image in not just my mind but in my eyes too. So that i may never forget your suffering face as my hands stutter to hold in your life so long as i live? tho i think i wouldnt have suffered that fate long as i was to be QUICKLY sent to follow you! Or was that not your hope? did you wish to have the meloncolly joy of my death before yours? Perhaps you wished to see my head split open by bullet to see what my mind truly looks like. Or maybe you wished to bathe in the blood of my body before yours so that they mingled closer than ever. then again you may have just wished to see my body SHATTERED by cannon fire into so many pieces so you could wear me to your own coffin. IS THAT WHAT YOU WANTED HENRY!?"

Ezra, without thought had strode forward. Chasing his ghostly fellow back. The specter having backed away unwittingly taken by the refrain. Ezras breathe heaving, the air held still simliarly shocked at the explosive force of the words just spoken. Henry, having shrunken from the blast slowly pulled together his measure again.

"So death was too good for you?"

"death was too kind" Ezra spat back, turning his heel and taking a few steps away only to slump towards the wall.

"i...I morned you, all of you... Would i could, i don't know if i would not go back to let my blood join the mud with the lot." His voice now wavvering "i loved you all so much. my brothers, my sisters. To know you all died that day, to see all we had done in vain, to be snuffed out like the meagerest candle in the wind..."

The wind outside gusted for a moment, creaking the home, but the air inside did not stir, listening with intent.

"Henry i have missed you all, the aching of my heart never stopped. I did not catch an enemies bullet that day but your own had never left my veins." Turning back now to henry, ezra saw a softness in those seethless eyes. "i never forgot our purpose, i still fight for it to this moment. Tomorrow...tomorrow i push into law what we fought so hard for. what you all bled for. to make sure your lives were not in vain....and to redeem myself for having let your lives feed the plants in the gutter."

"Ezra...you still hold the candle?"

"i never let it go, i kept it lit with my own flesh when no wick remained and became a torch. I let the flames feed on me as sure as the fires of hell. I could not let the darkness win again when your pyre was so bright... I don't ask you to forgive me, i ask that you wait for me. My body will yet enter the ground but not until i have seen the fires sustained for all the kindling you all gave. Please, find peace, know the day was lost but i will win the war for us. Save a place for my body beside yours at the table of the holy. I will join you. But not yet..."

Henry stared for a minute at the wet eyes of Ezra. Counting the tears with the measure of breaths as some tempo to the flow of life.

"Do not forget us Ezra...your heart is our last drum, and we march to its finale beatings. for all our hurt...we do not wish you harm, only the comfort of your love once more. Send us a kiss now and again. So we know you still bleed our blood.

with that the air moved in and closed to darkness. Ezra awoke in his bed covered has when he laid what feels like moments before. but there the sun could be seen shining its light through the cracked curtains. Shaking the sleep from his eyes he rose and prepared himself for his day in the light. On his way out he grabed his parchment, checking again it still remained safe in the container. Sealed again he stepped out of his home and took in a deep breath. He looked to the sky and let a single tear roll down his cheek. the air whipped by him but for a moment taking the dropplet off his face and into the sky for his brothers to accept a somber kiss.

[bookaddict24-7]

NaNoWriMo Tips & Tricks

(Image source is here.)

The beginning of December marks the end of NaNoWriMo, this fierce writing whale that we all try to overcome by the end of November. For years I have either watched others around me stand up to the challenge, or I have joined in and ended up failing, or backing out less than midway through. 

Confession: I never thought I would actually ever complete a NaNoWriMo chalenge.

Another Confession: This year was different. 

I want to share some of the tips I used (by accident or by pre-planning) that helped get me through this month, even though I worked a lot of holiday hours (holidays begin extra early in retail) and I was trying to keep my reading at a decent pace (this can perhaps be put into question). 

I don’t have rules--these are not things you HAVE to do to succeed because everyone does things a little differently, but I guess you could use them as a guide. To be completely transparent: I didn’t realize most of my own personal tips were working until the month ended and I was at the 50k mark. 

1. Time management. 

A lot of authors and writing gurus say that you should write every day. Being a person who has spent the last 2+ years in a weird writing rut, I can tell you that this rule is kind of bullshit. It’s rules like this one that made me start to think that maybe since I couldn’t muster up the courage or creative mind to sit down every day to write, I must not be a writer anymore. 

While granted that this rule isn’t a must for the year-round writer, for a NaNoWriMo writer, it’s an unfortunate MUST. Unless you’re like Sarah J. Maas, who can write 30k words in one day, I don’t recommend skipping too many days. The more days you miss, the more you need to write to catch up, or keep up. It’s more of a suggestion so you can maintain your stress levels low. 

2. Set Goals.

Before NaNoWriMo began, one of my best friends showed me this awesome post about how one could separate the number of words they need to write per day in order to reach 50k in one month. While at the time we didn’t realize that we would have the same goals on the actual website, it helped to mentally prepare myself for the challenge. If the website is still showing the daily goals, I strongly recommend jotting down how many words to write per day to reach 50k. It’s surprisingly manageable. 

3. Dedication. 

I can’t tell you how many times I said to myself, “I’m not going to write today. I’m so tired. I can’t.” But then I would sit at my computer after a late shift at work and write my daily goal. I have found that when you skip a day, or you give yourself too many excuses as to why you shouldn’t write on that day, then it becomes a slippery slope. I don’t know how it is for anyone else (and I can’t talk for anyone else but myself), but I tend to quit when too much time has gone by. The best way for me to remain dedicated to what I’m working on is by forcing myself to do what I need to do every day. 

4. Be Reasonable. 

To play devil’s advocate to the last tip: don’t overwork yourself. If you genuinely are exhausted, like falling asleep on your feet or just mentally done with the day, then reconsider your writing session. I remember a couple of days ago, I began writing before bed. I had just finished a late shift and I was exhausted. As I wrote to meet the daily goal, I found myself writing half asleep, waking up, and having to rewrite the sentence again. 

Be reasonable with yourself. Sleep, eat, drink lots of water, and remember to breathe some fresh air. Go to work/school/social events and let your mind focus on other things.

5. Be Determined to Finish. 

If you go into the challenge thinking or somehow knowing you won’t meet the goal, then there’s a greater chance that you won’t make it to 50k. Believe in yourself and your skill, because sure others may be cheering you own, but you’re your best cheerleader (to be a sappy tree). Believe you can, work towards it, and watch the word count climb and your goals become more attainable. 

6. Partner/Friends

If you know someone else who loves to write, or who has been thinking about doing NaNoWriMo, then ask them if they’d like to be your partner in crime. There are some people who lose themselves to the challenge, but there are others who just can’t seem to get into it, or have trouble keeping up with the goals or with the motivation. 

One of my best friends and I started the challenge together and we motivated each other to keep going. Her asking me if I’d written yet and her knowing what it felt like to work on something like NaNoWriMo helped me because someone else knew what was needed to succeed. Sometimes you need that extra push or reminder. Also, this is bad to say, but the guilt of having to say, “No...I haven’t written today...” if I hadn’t written was another motivating factor. 

7. To Plan or Not to Plan. 

Everyone writes differently, or else we’d have the same novels floating around. Much like with writing, everyone has a different approach to how they write and/or prep for NaNoWriMo. 

Truth time? I didn’t plan. At all. 

But then again, I’ve never been much of a planner. 

I kind of knew where I wanted my story to go, so I felt comfortable in that knowledge. Sometimes when I sat down to write I knew exactly what scene I wanted to work on because I’d been thinking about it all day. I’m a fan of picking names on the go, letting the story take me down unplanned paths, and kind of watching things develop on their own. When I start planning a story (which I did for the first novel I ever completed), I usually plan it by chapter and sometimes it fulfills that desire I have to write things down, but almost always the desire dies with the planning. 

This book has been years in the making because it touches on so much of my childhood and things I went through, so I didn’t really need to plan that part. But I still let the story take its own life because I see my novels as sentient beings who have the power to choose how they will come around. 

8. Remember that Your Word Count Might be Different from NaNoWriMo.

Imagine my surprise when I put in the chapters from Scrivener (the writing app I use on my Macbook, which you can buy in the App Store) into the NaNoWriMo word count verifier and I had written 400 words less than I’d originally thought! I’m glad I checked days before the final day because I would have been seriously pissed. 

This isn’t a big tip, but a reminder to double check and verify your word count every day. 

9. And with that, Check Your Word Count Every Day. 

I can’t even begin to state how much it helped me to see the progress every day on the NaNoWriMo website. It’s one thing knowing you’re writing towards this goal, but it’s another thing entirely to watch yourself getting closer to reaching it. 

10. It’s Attainable.

I used to believe that I could never do this. I thought I would take forever because of the type of writer I am. Hell, I never thought I’d ever write so much again. This goal is attainable. It may seem impossible or over the top, but it can be done. 

Granted, 50k is perhaps the length of a contemporary YA novel, but it is a huge goal to reach whether you’re actually writing a 50k novel, or a 100k novel. My book isn’t done yet, I’m missing abut 10-20k words before I can confidently say it’s done. But I don’t think you need to have it completed by 50k. You just have to reach that goal. 

You can do it. It’s a doable goal. 

Hopefully this helps you all with your writing! Sometimes I also think it would be a good idea to practice during the year. Set goals for yourself daily and within reason, and try to meet them! 

Happy reading!

[todaydreambelieversfic]

Author Spotlight: ItsNotEasyBeingQueen Day 4

Day 4:  Recs!

Oh, where to begin???  There are SO many wonderful fics out there that I cannot possibly reference them all. What’s funny is that every fic I’ve listed below is quite long – and I’m mostly a one-shot writer.  I am not sure what that says about me!  

Rec #1 – “Callaway Place” by @sunshineoptimismandangels https://archiveofourown.org/works/8791888?view_full_work=true https://www.fanfiction.net/s/12265808/1/Callaway-Place

Such an AMAZING piece of writing.  Take out the names “Kurt” and “Blaine” and this fic stands as a work of completely original fiction, perfectly suitable to be published as a novel or to be made into a movie.  Kurt and Blaine meet in a very unusual way as children, then find one another again as adults, becoming ensnared in a world of magic, mystery, and mortal danger.  I can recall stopping whatever I was doing to read each chapter as soon as it was posted.  This story is riveting from start to finish.  I wish I was as talented and creative as this author. You needn’t look much further than the Prologue to get drawn in:

The numb feeling in his chest was morphing into something else, not the steady fear he’d been running on, but something strong, something driving – it was morphing into anger. He walked up the old creaky stairs to the third floor, breath coming a little faster.

Blaine stood in the middle of the large open room, his muscles tense and his body trembling from head to toe. He clenched his jaw and balled his fist staring resolutely at the tall full length mirror in front of him. The twining vines of its frame radiating with a burning light, the glass heaving inward and out like the lung of a living creature. The only mirror in the house not broken.

All Blaine had ever wanted was to be rid of this thing, to run as far away from it as he possibly could. Now, he was staring it down like an enemy he was about to meet on the battlefield. Every instinct he had was telling him to run, to flee, to leave this place behind him for good. Instead, he took a step closer. And another. And another.

There were a myriad of small golden lights floating on the other side of the glass, swirling and swarming around calling to him. It wasn’t necessary; he didn’t need an enchantment to know what he had to do. At this point he’d do anything. He reached out an unsteady hand towards the glass, pressing his fingers and then his whole palm against it. The glass was warm and pulsing, and it had a give to it in a way that glass really shouldn’t. Blaine shuddered and closed his eyes, drawing on all the courage he had. Then, he opened his eyes and pressed his hand harder against the glass; his hand started to sink in, like moving through thick mud.

Blaine wanted to scream, but he stuffed it down, pushing forward until the mirror had engulfed his arm up to the elbow. Blaine cleared his throat trying to sound steady, “I’m coming Kurt,” he promised and then took a step forward, the mirror pulling him through to the other side.

 Rec #2 – “Heartstone” by @sunshineoptimismandangels

https://archiveofourown.org/works/4124506?view_full_work=true

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11309971/1/Heartstone

Yes, I realize I’m dedicating two of my recs to the same author, but you asked for my favorite stories, and it just so happens that she penned two of them.   (Don’t complain too much – I tried picking two others from memory and realized both were her stories, too.  Apparently, I have a fanfic type.  I’m choosing fics by two other authors, though, to spread the love.) Again, this fic has a supernatural element, and the author creates a completely unique world into which she deposits Kurt and Blaine.  Under a curse meant to spare his life, Blaine endeavors for decades to recover that which would restore his humanity.  Fate has, unbeknownst to either man, tied Kurt and Blaine together in a tale of mystery and fearful creatures that seek to destroy Blaine.  Seriously – stop reading my drivel and go read this story.

I had a terrible time choosing an excerpt to post here.  I think this gives you a good idea of the quality and tenor of the writing without giving away too much plot:

Blaine lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling and waiting for his alarm to go off. He tilted his head, finding images in the fibers of the ceiling paint, a face, a castle…

 A monster.

Blaine shut his eyes to rid his mind of the images of a fanged creature staring down at him; his alarm clock went off, and even though he'd been waiting for it, it made his heart rate spike as he sat straight up in bed and slammed his palm on the alarm to shut it up. He'd been having nightmares again, worse than usual, his mind dredging up the most evil of his memories, red eyes glaring at him in the dark and screams of pain.

 Blaine got up from his bed, swallowing deeply, and walked over to the mirror that hung above his dresser. He moved it to the side to reveal the safe in the wall and worked the combination until it opened. Inside, was the source of his nightmares; they'd gotten worse since he traded Felix for this vial. He pulled it out and held it in his hand for a moment, the heat inside warming him a little, but still making him shiver. He put the vial down on his dresser top and went to get ready for the day.

 He'd had the vial for a few weeks now but hadn't done anything with it. He told himself that it was because he didn't have everything he needed for the ritual yet, which was true. It was also true that Blaine hadn't been trying very hard to get what he needed. That changed today, though; he had an appointment late that afternoon to get the piece he needed in order to finally use the heartstone remains. He should be excited, elated even, but he couldn't muster it.

 Mostly he felt… worried. Worried about what he would find out, worried about where the new information he gained would lead him. Away from New York? Towards facing the truths that have been chasing him most of his life? Away from Kurt? The thought of Kurt surprised him and he pinched the bridge of his nose trying to concentrate. He chided himself; he couldn't give up on what he'd been working towards almost his whole life just because of a pretty boy with a pretty smile that made Blaine feel… made Blaine feel for the first time in too long.

 Blaine stared at the clothes hanging in his closet while wearing only the jeans he'd slipped on after his shower. He never thought much about what he wore, but today he wanted to look nice, at least as nice as he could; he was probably seeing Kurt this afternoon and he didn't know when he'd see him again after the ritual. Blaine sighed; all of his clothes were various shades of black and gray and when did he become so boring? He ended up picking out a sweater that could conceivably be considered navy, layered with a crisp gray button up underneath, and resigned himself to looking as put together as he could.

 On his way out, he grabbed the vial and stuck it in his coat pocket. He wasn't foolish enough to leave it behind. He kept it in the safe at night and on his person at all other times. He may hate what it was and what it represented, but he knew he needed it. It felt heavy in his pocket, like it was dragging his whole body down. The more Blaine thought about it, the more he wasn't sure he should even meet up with Kurt today; wouldn't it be better just to fade from Kurt's life like he'd never been there? That thought made his chest unexpectedly tight.

 Kurt was the first friend he'd allowed himself in some time, he wasn't sure why'd he'd made the exception for Kurt, but he had. He considered Kurt a friend and the thought of him warmed Blaine's cold world. If he'd been someone else maybe he'd let himself have more than friendship with Kurt. He was smart, and attractive and inconceivably patient with Blaine. Still, it was a moot point now, now that Blaine was going to perform this ritual life was going to change. It had to.

 He'd have one last cup of cinnamon coffee with Kurt and then close that chapter of his life. He could do that. Blaine gulped as the cold wind picked-up outside. He could do that, right?

 Rec #3: I Won’t Let You Down by Mrs Criss 2012

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/10671690/1/I-Won-t-Let-You-Down

https://archiveofourown.org/works/2259336?view_full_work=true

Another favorite author whose work I admire is Mrs Criss 2012.  “I Won’t Let You Down” is a beautiful, emotional, often angsty romance between an older (age 27) Kurt and younger (age 16) Blaine.  Before you get potentially turned off by the age difference, let me assure you, this is a fic about true love and compassion and finding out that the person you’re meant to be with might surprise you.  The age difference is thoroughly discussed and is a logical part of the story.  Blaine’s family moves in across the street from Burt Hummel.  Kurt, who lives in New York, comes for a visit, but is a hardened version of the boy he used to be.  However, the young, unhappy boy across the road is just the person to make Kurt become the best version of himself again.  It takes a loooong time to get there, and Kurt’s horribly maddening sometimes, and Burt is quite the watchdog papa bear protector – of Blaine – but it’s all so very worth it.

This excerpt may be a spoiler (so sue me), but it’s one of the best first (well, technically, second, but you have to read it to understand that) kiss scenes ever.

"That was your first kiss?" Kurt asks, stricken.

Blaine doesn't speak but gives a small nod, looking down at his shoes as the rain runs from his hair.

"Oh Blaine," Kurt says sadly. "You...I...I'm..." He is fully intending to apologize, but when Blaine looks up, pain and anguish painted across his face, Kurt is overcome. Surging forward, he closes the gap between them and claims Blaine's mouth in a hungry kiss. The feel of Blaine's wet hair sliding through his fingers only makes him press their bodies closer together, and then suddenly Blaine is kissing back in spite of himself, his hands fisting the front of Kurt's sweater and tugging him unfathomably closer still. The feel of their lips together is better than either could have ever imagined, and every ounce of frustration, anger and desire manifests itself in a kiss which neither ever wants to end. 

The initial passion gives way to deep longing, and the kiss becomes romantic and loving. Tentatively, Kurt dares to taste with his tongue and when Blaine moans softly in his throat and opens his mouth wider, Kurt feels himself growing hard immediately. They keep kissing, right there on the corner of Blaine's driveway in the pouring rain, with Kurt's hands framing Blaine's face tenderly until eventually they slow. Even then they are both reluctant to part, dropping sweet kisses to each other's lips as gradually Blaine allows an ear splitting grin to take over his face. 

"You have no idea how desperately I've wanted to do that," Kurt whispers, his eyes still closed as he presses his forehead against Blaine's. "I just..." He goes back in for more and Blaine responds willingly, his hands on the small of Kurt's back this time, pushing their groins together. It becomes Kurt's turn to whimper, and his soft groan is immediately swallowed by Blaine who runs his tongue into Kurt's mouth once more. This time, when they break it is to fall into a deep, long hug, and yes, Blaine does fit as perfectly as Kurt hoped he would.

He holds him tight and allows himself to be held in return, noticing how although Blaine might be young, and relatively small, he is manly and firm against him, and just the feel of Blaine's arms around him make him feel safe and secure.

Rec #4 – Angel in a Red Vest by @dontbefanci

https://archiveofourown.org/works/3143186?view_full_work=true

I just read this on a recommendation from another reader and I was blown away. Blaine is a firefighter who meets Kurt, a volunteer disaster responder.  It’s masterfully written, romantic, and utterly heartbreaking at times – and I read the whole 100k+ fic in two days.  (My eyes may never be the same, but it was totally worth it.)  It’s all so good and hard to parse up, but here’s a little early scene to whet your appetite:

“Is, um…is there something else I can do for you?”

 “Yes.” A blush crept up Blaine’s face as he smiled, his eyes darting away from Kurt’s gaze and back again. “Kurt, I actually came by for another reason.”

 “Oh?” Kurt tilted his head in question unable to hide his grin. Not only had Chief remembered his name, but the way he said it, as though it curled in his mouth like a ribbon of candy. Kur…t.

 “I was wondering…if you would like to join me for dinner one night this week.”

 Their eyes locked and Kurt no longer had to worry about hiding the hitches in his breath. He completely forgot how to breathe. But, he found his voice, if not his ability to speak properly. “Sure. That would…yes. I’d…I’d like that.” Smooth, Hummel.

 “Good. I’ll um…I need a way to contact you?”

 “Oh. That might help.”

 They exchanged numbers, through their phones and Blaine pocketed his as he stood pausing in the frame of Kurt’s office door, another blush sweeping over his cheeks. “So. I’ll call soon?”

 “That would be great. And, come back by. I know Dot wants to meet you.”

 Blaine’s stance stiffened, zippering back up into Chief mode and he smiled tightly. “Will do.” He nodded and winked and disappeared out the door as swiftly as he’d come in.

 And Kurt? Well, Kurt let out a whoosh of air, breathing properly for the first time in about ten minutes. “Oh. Mygod.”

 He stared at his desk, the papers on it, his to-do list over and over again, not able to start on anything, irritated with his school boy behavior. Really now. It’s a date. You have dates. You even have dates with handsome men. What IS your problem?

And he couldn’t answer even himself; his face remaining heated and flushed until he finally pulled himself out and it and focused on his volunteer email list to announce an upcoming training.

And then the door opened again.

It was Blaine, rushed and unable to make eye contact.

“Hello again.”

“Yeah. Hi. So. I wimped out just like I promised I wouldn’t.”

“Pardon?”

“Look. I’m not normally this ridiculous, but um…” He stepped in all the way and leaned against the door frame, nervous and wide-eyed. “You entrance me, Kurt Hummel. What are you doing for lunch today?”

Kurt laughed. Hot and adorable was an amazing combination on any man and here it was, standing right in front of him. “I was just going to grab something up the road. Would you like to join me?”

“Yes. Please.”

“So, is this in addition to or instead of…?”

Blaine started to answer and stopped, measuring his words. “In addition? I just didn’t want to put it off and talk myself out of it.”

“Is that a habit of yours? Talking to yourself?”

“No. Yes? Probably.” Blaine blushed and stopped talking, looking away. He started and stopped two more times, finally giving up.

“Well.” Kurt looked down at his desk, collecting his thoughts that had scattered all over the place. “Shall I pick you up at the station?”

“No. My invitation; my ride.”

Kurt nodded and smiled. He’s even adorably polite. I might die. “Noon is fine.”

“I’ll…I’ll see you then.” Blaine grabbed for the door handle, missed, tried again and succeeded. “And, I won’t bother you again until then. Promise.”

“You’re most definitely not a bother.”

[missmeikakuna]

Vocaloid fanfic- The Librarian and the Maybe-Bisexual Bookworm Ch. 1

This is a fanfic I wrote for Vocaloid Amino for a previous Pride Month and thought I'd post it here. Rated: T Fandom: Vocaloid Relationship: Yukari x IA Relationship Type: F/F Description: Yukari is a hardworking student who manages to balance her studies with her relationship with a boy. Things start to change when she meets her high school's young, beautiful new librarian IA. Yukari asks her to help her find a lesbian-themed novel like one she's read and all goes well until she realises she might be more like the characters in those novels than she thought.

Chapter one: Self-discovery is like finding a book in a new genre.

The library was quiet as usual, and Yukari couldn’t be more mad.

Exams were looming over everyone. Or maybe just her since no one was here studying. No groaning over a difficult question, no asking friends for help, not even distracted chatter about the latest meme. It was just her and the librarian.

Yukari brought a chunky book to the back of the room and rang the bell. She would wonder how anyone could hear its tiny tinkle, but then she remembered that no one was here to drown out the sound with inane conversation.

The room was so quiet that the next sound almost caused Yukari to drop her book. In the room behind the librarian’s desk, dozens of books thudded the ground. Yukari heard a squeak of pain.

A moment later, a woman who barely looked older than Yukari opened the door and made her way to the desk, straightening her uniform and wiping the books’ dust off her shoulders. Her blonde, almost pink hair was so long that Yukari could only see a part of it as the rest of it disappeared behind the desk. Her smile was small but somehow dimples were visible on her chubby cheeks. Despite those cheeks, the rest of her body was so thin she seemed more like a wisp of light than a real person grounded in this reality. Her unbelievably pale skin added to this impression.  Her big eyes were the colour of harvestbells and the more Yukari described this girl in her head, the more she realised that she was standing there staring at this person she was 55% sure didn’t really exist.

“Sorry for the wait. Are you looking to borrow a book?” 

Maybe she did exist.

The woman’s voice caressed Yukari’s ears. The library was designed specifically not to echo and yet the woman’s voice seemed to echo on its own. It was high-pitched, but less in a nasal way and more in an operatic way, though even in this empty room it didn’t sound loud enough to fill a theatre.

Yukari gulped and looked down. “Uh, I was actually wondering if you had any recommendations. I’m looking for a novel similar to this one.” She raised her head. “I’m still doing school work, I swear! I won’t read it until after exams are done.”

The woman’s giggles embraced Yukari. “It’s okay. I won’t judge.” The woman’s eyes somehow managed to grow even wider. “Oh, and, uh, I’m kind of new here. First day. I don’t really know enough of what’s here to make any recommendations.”

“Oh, um…. I guess I’ll just...” Yukari said, throwing the book in the returns box and galloping away.

“Wait!” The woman called out. Yukari did as she commanded. “Um, what did you like about this book? I could recommend something I’ve read and see if it’s here.”

Yukari’s cheeks changed from the paleness of ghosts to the bright shade of poppies. “It was… a strange book. It was about a Japanese woman meeting an Australian florist during World War One. I… I’m not gay or anything, but I was wondering if there were any other books about a romance between two women. You don’t see that too often, so it stood out.”

The woman grinned. “You’ve come to the right person! I’ve got loads of books like that in my collection.” Yukari clenched her teeth to stop her jaw from dropping. “Do you want to read another historical lesbian romance or a lesbian romance about flowers or maybe just a regular modern lesbian romance?”

It took Yukari a moment to process what she was asking as the frequent casual use of the word ‘lesbian’ threw her off.

“Oh, uh, I don’t mind.” 

The librarian leaned over her desk to get a good look at Yukari. “Hmmm…. I think ‘Rentica’ by Ikamusume Hunter would be a good fit for you.” She typed into her computer and frowned. “... and it’s not here. Sorry. Oh, um…” She lowered the volume of her voice despite no one else being there. “You could always borrow it from me. Come here after exams are done and I’ll lend it to you.”

Yukari nodded. “Thank you, miss…”

The woman laughed. “You can call me IA.”

When Yukari headed back to the table she was studying at, she heard a beep on her phone and saw a message.

Hey babe, wanna hang out tonight ;) - Roro row your boat

Yukari smiled. Roro still hadn’t changed that punny text signature even after his grades in English started slipping. She remembered the adorably awkward time he tried to explain the joke to her in Japanese.

Her smile dropped when she looked back at IA, who was struggling to keep the pile of books in her arms balanced kept dropping them.

Yukari passed all of her exams, though just barely in home ec. She headed to the library after getting her marks back.

IA chuckled and rubbed the back of her neck. “I forgot to bring it. I guess I should have been more specific about which date you should have come here. Would you be able to wait until the library closes? We can head back to my place and I can give it to you there.”

Yukari’s cheeks reddened. “Is that allowed?”

IA tilted her head to the side like a dog failing to understand a command. “Why wouldn’t it be?”

Yukari grinned her concern away. 

After IA locked the library entrance, she led Yukari to her old car with bits of paint missing. Yukari pushed the take away boxes off her seat. 

IA smirked at the wheel and sped to their destination. Yukari had to hold onto the door to keep herself from accidentally ramming into it. 

IA’s house was a tiny apartment with piles of books on the floor. She somehow knew where everything was and found ‘Rentica’ with ease. It was a thin book with a ghost silhouette filled with a floral pattern on the cover.

“It’s a romance between a working woman and a strange woman she thinks might be a ghost but doesn’t know for certain. Enjoy.”

“T-thank you. So, um, I’m sorry if this is rude, but I didn’t expect you to have a car like that.”

“Oh, I like to save money wherever I can. Books don’t grow on trees. Well, actually they technically do, but not direct…. Anyway, I hope you like the book. Do you need me to drive you home?”

Yukari shook her head. “My boyfriend lives near here.”

IA had an expression Yukari never imagined seeing on her. Her smile was still there, but it was smaller and didn’t show her teeth. The outer corners of her eyes were creased and her eyebrows were furrowed. 

“Oh. Of course. I, uh, hope things go well with him.”

Silence followed. Yukari froze for a moment, then bowed and left without saying a word.

She rang Roro’s doorbell and when he didn’t open the door, she kept pressing the buzzer over and over again.

When he finally opened it, and he only partially opened it, Yukari giggled. He was wearing pyjamas that were way too big for him and his cotton candy hair was a mess.

“Good morning,” she said with a smirk.

Roro glared at her. “You saw me at school today.”

“So, uh, can I hang out for a bit?”

The boy looked behind him. “I don’t know if this is a great time. I’m kinda watching a show and it’s getting really good. You can watch it with me if you want, but it’s near the end so you might be a tad confused.”

“It’s okay. I’ve got a book I can read.”

“You came all the way here to read a book?”

Yukari chuckled. “I was already doing something near here and thought I’d drop by.”

Roro opened the door wider. “Okay, I guess.”

When they got to the living room, Roro sat down on the couch and Yukari sat on a beanbag. For the first few pages of the book she kept getting distracted by the dialogue on the show, but after that she was hooked.

She started to pick up on a few similarities between the characters and her and IA. The ghostlike girl had a similar physical description to what IA looked like and was incredibly friendly. The main character didn’t look like Yukari but had the same love of books. She was also a little shy, spending a good chunk of the story trying to muster the courage to talk to the other woman.

The writing was simple and Yukari managed to get through half of it before Roro finished his show. In fact, it just stopped after she reached the book couple’s first kiss.

Roro slid down the couch and sat next to Yukari, kissing her on the cheek. She turned her head and kissed him on the lips.

Soon enough tongue was added and both people’s breaths became louder. 

Something strange happened. After a while, Yukari forgot who she was kissing and thought about the kiss scene in the book. 

For a while she felt as if she was kissing a blonde woman with pale skin.

When she returned to reality, she pushed Roro away. Her head was spinning and her breaths quickened almost to the point of hyperventilation. 

She covered her mouth, trying to push the image of IA out of her head. She silently swore. She was familiar with these heart palpitations. They were the same as when she first started having feelings for Roro.

“Um, I… I have to go.”

“Why? Did I do something wrong?”

Yukari shook her head. “I’ll see you at school.”

She ran out of the house with her book. She raced home on foot despite knowing the long distance ahead of her.

‘I’m not a lesbian. I’m not a lesbian! I like Roro! What the hell’s wrong with me?’

When she finally reached home, she jumped on her laptop and searched, ‘how to know if lesbian’. She found a lot of stories that didn’t fit her own. Most of the girls online had always felt different but couldn’t put their finger on why. They told stories about having a boyfriend they felt nothing towards. And some of them said they had crushes on female celebrities and classmates when they were as young as eight years old.

However, one person’s advice struck a chord. ‘If you’re questioning your sexuality, you might not be gay. Consider the other labels out there, such as bisexual, asexual and pansexual.’

Such as bisexual, asexual and pansexual.

Such as bisexual.

Bisexual.

Yukari’s entire body shook. She didn’t even need to look into the other sexualities, although a tiny logical part of her thought she should. She found the word and that word made tears fall down her cheeks.

She pictured her parents towering over her, shaking their heads before disappearing. She imagined Roro crying. She could see her female classmates shuffling their chairs a few inches further away.

However, after a few seconds of sobbing she smiled. She felt as if she had been welcomed into a club. This weird girl crush may have been just that- a crush, and given her pre-existing relationship a forbidden one- but a discovery about herself was still a discovery. She felt like she had stumbled upon a book in an entirely new genre.

Yukari opened her book from where she was up to and read the rest of the story, kicking everyone from Roro and her other classmates to her parents out of her mind. It was just her and the ghostlike librarian.

[danaspamm]

Crimson Part 2

When visitation hours were over around 9PM, I went home that night with tears falling down my eyes in the front seat of my mom’s car. I didn’t speak to her the whole way home. The doctors said it could take three months for the wound to heal so he would have to give up football for the rest of the season and pretty much give up his livelihood for the next year.

I went straight to my room and closed the door, changing into shorts and a t-shirt to sleep in, then turning off my lights and climbing into bed, putting in headphones and listening to something to try and put myself to sleep, but the thought of Anon lying on the concrete with a gunshot wound kept playing on repeat in my mind.

The box that Anon had given me sat on my nightstand, untouched. I didn’t plan on opening it until he could witness it.

When I finally fell asleep, it was 1AM even though I was wanting to go to sleep as soon as my had touched the pillow.

As I woke up, the cold, dark clouds left grey light flowing through my window. I checked the time. 3PM.

The hours flew by as I continued to listen to music through my headphones and stared up at the ceiling, occasionally closing my eyes and trying to fall back asleep while the cold air from the fan pressed against my arms and head. I didn’t get any messages the whole day and when I tried to check Instagram or Snapchat, all I saw was how sorry people felt for Anon and how they were so heartbroken over what happened to him even though half of the people who were posting weren’t close to him.

I finally got the courage to get dressed for the day and get my mom to drive me to the hospital.

I knocked on the door just like the day before and walked over to his bedside. He was sleeping much like before. HIs father and sister had left, supposedly at home

My hand pushed his hair back, the softness of it drifting over my palm. His eyes slowly opened and made contact with mine. No smile on his face. Just a look of dullness and boredom.

“Hey.”He whispered, pulling the sheets over him and sighing, “I go home tomorrow.”

He was finally smiling and my heart was filled with reassurance and content. ~=~ “What were you thinking when you got shot?”I mustered up the courage to ask as I rested my head on his shoulder.

We were sitting on his couch in the living room and watching Lifetime movies while his mom Wass making dinner in the kitchen behind us.

“I was thinking of you…Naomi and my parents and how they would deal with it. Too many things to count, really.”

(I like the name Naomi….It’s cute)

His mom was walking around the kitchen and pulling things out of cabinets. The only thing I could think of was how hard she was working to keep her son happy while he was dealing with the traumatic event. I stopped by to check on him after school had ended and tried to keep his mind off of things.

While his dad was at work, his mom would sometimes ask me to redress his wound because it was “just too painful to look at.” I didn’t blame her for saying it. She was right, it was painful and it was even harder to watch as he looked over at me with a dull look in his eyes.

I sat on the bathroom’s countertop and watched him as he lifted his shirt up, then started staring at the wound in the mirror. Almost as if he was examining it and trying to connect the dots of something I wasn’t quite sure of.

“That’s pretty,” I paused, “morbid,” I whispered. Taking out the first-aid kit, I pulled out the necessary creams and medical tapes that the doctor had told him to use.

“Here comes the fun part.”He bit his lip.

Tears started forming in my eyes for a moment, but I was quick to wipe them away without him noticing. My chest felt heavy and light all at the same time.

“Why are you crying?”

Busted.

“I don’t know.”I laughed, wrapping my arms around his torso, attempting to pull him closer. The warmth of his chest radiated onto my cheek. I could hear his heart beating. Small waves of tiredness fell over me as I rubbed his back, “You’re the one who’s supposed to be crying, not me.”I chuckled and pulled away.

Once I had re-dressed him, we both left the bathroom and went to his room. Trophies and various pictures lined his dresser that stood against the plain, white walls of his bedroom. His bed was covered with navy blue sheets and grey pillows-firm, but soft enough to sink your head into.

I sat next to Anon as he played video games, occasionally putting my hand on his knee or pushing my hand through his hair as an attempt to comfort him. He rejected me and politely moved my hand away. He’d say something along the lines of, “I’m trying to focus.” Or, “Stop being so nice.”

He’d been playing online with friends from school and every time someone had been defeated, I would hear loud screams of other players coming through his headset, or Anon would become aggravated, but end up still playing anyways.

“I think your mom’s done with dinner,” I said, quiet and timid. He didn’t respond. 

He obviously didn’t hear me, but I continued watching him play for a few more moments.

“Anon?”I said a bit louder. He moved one cuff of his headset from his ear and hummed.

“I said I think your mom’s done with dinner.”

“I’m not eating.”

“You have to eat, I don’t want you to stave.”I tried to remain sweet and kind.

“Well, if you don’t want me to starve…”He smiled at me and lightly kissed me on the cheek, saying a quick goodbye to his friends and turning off the console.

We walked to the kitchen and saw his mother and little sister fixing themselves plates of food. Anon went to the cabinet to pull out a plate, but was stopped by his mom, “I’ll get it, sweetie. Just sit. You too Y/n, you’re still a guest.”

I smiled politely and sat down at the table next to Anon, arms crossed in my lap.

“Dad’s home!”Naomi lit up with a smile and raced to the door, bouncing up and down as her father approached the door, unlocking it and stepping inside, taking off his shoes as soon as he reached the wooden floor. He hugged Naomi and set his backpack, filled with documents and work files, onto the couch.

We said hello to each other with a small smile and a wave.

As Anon and I ate, his unoccupied hand would hold mine. The conversation between his parents was about the drama at work or how school was going with Naomi. Nothing about Anon came up until things got silent.

“How are things going with you?”His mom asked.

He hummed a little bit and struggled to come up with an answer. 

“When can I do football again?”

The question left his parents shocked and quiet. I’m assuming they didn’t want to break the news to him in front of me or his sister since the thought of him not playing for the rest of the season would simply shatter his image of the perfect life he wanted to have. To Anon, nothing was better than winning a football game and looking up into the stands with triumph and waving to his parents as they had bright smiles on their faces.

Their kid was successful. Their little boy was doing something he loved and was accomplishing so much.

“I don’t know. We’ll have to ask your doctor.”

Things got quiet again.

“I’m finished with dinner.”He said quietly, giving his mother a blank stare of disappointment. Of course, it wasn’t her fault.

“You can leave your plate, I’ll wash up after.”His father said.

I followed after, not saying anything to make the situation any more awkward than it had to be. I went to Anon’s room. He was laying down on the floor, the lights off, a shadow of blinds cast on his face. He was linking his hands on his abdomen and staring up at the ceiling.

“Are you dead or something?”I stifled out a laugh, then immediately realized my mistake,“That was a stupid joke…"

“I’m just thinking for a little bit. I’m fine.”He sighed and closed his eyes. I laid next to him on my side, staring at his cheek while he had tears building in his eyes. His sadness was too devastating to watch, so I looked out of the window and listened to him sniffle. The street light was flickering and the dark sky had yet to be filled with stars.

“Why do you still hang out with me?”His voice cracked.

“Because you’re cool. We talk about what games you like, Stranger Things, I support you and you support me. I like you.” I hesitated, then took his hand from his warm chest and interlocked it with mine, “Why? I-I mean, like…I don’t want to be a bitch, but do I not make you happy?” I questioned.

“A lot of things don’t make me happy, but that doesn’t mean that you don’t. Trust me, you’re not doing anything wrong.”He got quiet, then opened his eyes again, turning to face me. The tears had slipped down his eyes that were red and had his bottom eyelashes stuck together.

“Aw…Don’t cry. I don’t like seeing you upset.”I moved closer to him and let his head rest close to my collar bone, then put my hand on his head, stroking his hair and shushing him

“I’m sorry.”He breathed heavily into the cloth of my shirt.

“Don’t be sorry. There’s nothing to be sorry about.”I whispered.

The night ran on even though we both had school the next day. For the next few hours, we laid on the carpet of Anon’s bedroom floor as he quietly cried himself to sleep, my head cradled in his hands. The shadow of his blinds remained on his face and my chest burned with a nervousness that had been building up through the course of that weekend. Soon, I was crying too.

And even sooner, I was asleep.