#final score 3/10
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Brat but its brat again because its still brat thoughts because . Because
Coming back to the top to say that i get kind of nasty hateful in this but like thats par for the course for my brat opinions just a heads up that if youre gonna get offended get those fucking cocks out and start stroking you brat loving masochists
Yung lean 👍
The bb tricks verse goes crazy but the remix is bad
Ariana grande song was ok / good
Might say something stupid is genuinely very bad. The vocals sound weird like it is off putting to me. Like i think the tone shift is very random and doesnt work.
Talk talk remix is good. Can we go back to my place 💥 i dont like the um... piano... that part where its like talk to me in french but like the background production that goes up... just an example of the weird ass production choices that make it different but not good. Not good different. Overall pretty good song imo EVERYBODY JUMP 🔫 🙌
Everything is romantic wtf is going on and who is this for WTF IS GOING ON
Rewind finally sounds like something is happening like at the very least the song makes sense. Im not loving it but its like an actual song. Wait it just started getting weird in a bad way. I dont listen to bladee though maybe thats their thing, i feel like it is SORRY i actually care about you bladee fans
The end of so i is kind of good. wait nevermind it lost it
Girl so confusing remix is still good but like taylor wasnt available even though they have to be around each other ? Ik lorde and her have beef but idc
Just the choices of who she picked to feature on this are so ... it kind of shows her taste level lacking to me... caroline polacheck... ok. Addison rae. ok. no one iconic... no legends were available for brat 2. Gaga is desperate shed fly to groit briteen for this for sure. Dont care if shes in america shut up. Not really a fan but taylor wouldve been really cunty here. no tove lo feature she wouldve eaten it up.
Charli to me sounds like beep boop i am a robort. Its like if good edm was trying to be different but didnt have any good ideas so they just started hitting buttons. To me. Like i just think people who had their minds blown by brat need to listen to more music. Anyways i say this but some of my mutuals loved it, so sorry, and also some of them have great taste usually. So idk. My blog i get to hate.
The whole album is like what if we made it sound bad for no reason AGAIN ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️
Oops i accidentally posted it early. Well now i can stop listening. Im not editing this
#final score 3/10#because i find it to be more insulting than 2/10 for example. not only was it bad it was disappointing
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once again i am saying spotify needs an incognito mode for wrapped. i think i should be able to cordon off the 80000 hours i spent listening to the taylor swift album because i was in the middle of writing 7000 words about it. i don't think that should count.
#i do love TTPD to the point that i've TTPD-pilled myself and now think it's objectively her best album#and renders basically everything but folklore and like 2-3 songs on some other albums irrelevant#(ok 5 songs on red)#and people arguing otherwise are crazy and also will agree with me in 10 years' time#AND ALSO. 2024 became the year i finally had the experience of#Wow Taylor Swift Released An Album Shockingly Keyed In To Challenges In My Personal Life#i did not have a break-up soundtracked by red like so many but this year... this year she and i were really Connected#so i mean it would have been high up anyway for sure#BUT STILL!!!!!!!!#anyway. not as annoying as the year i got rly into the succession & MI:Fallout scores for work purposes#which rendered my top 100 list basically unplayable
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PASSED ALL MY CLASSES YIPPEEEE
#personal#the engineering chronicles#on the one hand how the mighty have fallen etc but on the other. thank FUCK this semester is over#it wasn’t even that bad objectively like if i hadn’t had the musical im pretty sure this semester would have been a breeze. but w the#musical everything was so scattered i never had time to do hw and i had to skip classes to meet w ppl for group projects bc the only time#any of us were available was in the mornings except then the meetings would go later than planned and i wouldn’t be able to make it to#my morning class and. etc. rehearsals till 10 like 5 times a week just did not work on in this regard. BUT WE DID IT <3 scraped a b- out of#physics w my highest test score in that class and will likely end probability w a b#<- he put in my final exam grade (88 🥳) but there are still three labs that need to be graded so technically my grade could fall to a b- or#c+ but neither is likely#still mad abt that 60 i got on the last exam bc if i had done as well on that exam as i did every other exam for this class i could have#ended w a b+ or a- but. whatever i’m just relieved this courseload is over with. even if i will be thrown right back into everything in a#week at least there is this week for me to relax and not feel awful for failing even more classes this year lmao
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Me: I got a 25 on the ACT!
Mom: it won't get you into BYU, especially with your math grade the way it is.
Me: I have a 3.7 GPA, and I can always retake the ACT?
Mom: you're going to need a really good admissions essay if you want to get into BYU.
Me: thanks, mom.
#25 without even studying#so anyways now i don't want to tell her about my AP test score#it's a 3 which means that I passed#but at the same time#I'm always told to do better#and there's no validation there#just do better so you can get into your dream school#like mother. i'm trying!#but do you know what straight a's get me? panic attacks every time i get anything less than an A#do you want to repeat 9th grade where i was told that every second counted towards college and you'd have to hold me#as i cried at 10 pm at night because I thought I wasn't good enough#and it's taken me literal years to finally reach the conclusion that my grades aren't everything and even then i still panic#whenever i get anything less than a C#the math grade was an outlier from a set of horrible circumstances#i finished 11th with 5 A's two B's and a D and you come after me for the D#it's always 'do better; your grades suck' when I have one bad grade#i'm taking 3 AP classes next year because I want to college credit#I was on the honor roll the entirety of junior high#I'm working towards a chord at graduation#maybe one day i'll be praised for everything i've sacrificed just to be good enough#i know that I need better grades and scores for BYU#and I've literally been working my ass off to get into BYU my entire life
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woohoo spiraling out of control right now (what else is new really I've been fucked up and spiraling for weeks now) and trying to figure out reasons not to delete my tumblr and discord and myself along the way
but you know. talking about myself on my blog automatically means I'm attention seeking and fishing for pity right? should just shut up and stick to the news eh, it's all I'm good for :D
anyway if you need me I'll be in the corner reliving the past, coming to terms with reality, and trying to convince myself I'm not the problem despite every indication to the contrary ✌︎︎
#sterechats :)#09:58 pm - this is a bad idea but scheduling it anyway#what's the worst that can happen really? everyone leaves again? nobody talks to me again?#probably gonna delete this in the morning so. meh. not like it matters not like I matter :D#10:29 pm - wow it feels like my head is on fire#like my brain is actually burning and I can't do a damn thing about it#I should be happy right now! the devils are winning! my favorite guys are scoring!#but no! I'm barely keeping it together around my family and praying I don't wake up tomorrow <3#11:00 pm - I need to get out of here#I need to get out of here out of here out of here I can't stay here any more this is killing me#everyone hates me and I need to chew my arms open maybe then everything will make sense#why am I even writing these tags what does it matter#I was so much more in control of myself when I was sh-ing#maybe I should get back to that maybe it'll help I don't know anymore#I just want my friends back but they hate me hahahaha#11:24 pm - wonder how many people are gonna block me after this one#how many people will finally be fed up and leave for good#everyone leaves and I should be used to this by now#here's a truck stop instead of saint peter's (yeah yeah yeah yeah)#11:41 pm - it's friday afternoon/there goes antigone to be buried alive#in the next world I want to be something useful/like a staple gun/or in love#I would fall off a cliff for you/a thousand times and call it a good day#maybe I'm just incapable of being human! maybe that's it!#maybe I'm not even human at all... but something worse instead...#1:22 am - moving the posting of this back from 3 to 6 am#not that that matters and not that I matter but I don't think I'll sleep#and I don't want this to post when I'm awake#I know I'm just going to get unfollowed and blocked and left behind as always#because happiness and good things and friendships just aren't things I get to have really#I just wish people would stop lying and telling me they're different and they'll stay when they're not different and won't stay
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Look.
I have made you a chart. A very simple chart.
People say "You have to draw the line somewhere, and Biden has crossed it-" and my response is "Trump has crossed way more lines than Biden".
These categories are based off of actual policy enacted by both of these men while they were in office.
If the ONLY LINE YOU CARE ABOUT is line 12, you have an incredible amount of privilege, AND YOU DO NOT CARE ABOUT PALESTINIANS. You obviously have nothing to fear from a Trump presidency, and you do not give a fuck if a ceasefire actually occurs. You are obviously fine if your queer, disabled, and marginalized loved ones are hurt. You clearly don't care about the status of American democracy, which Trump has openly stated he plans to destroy on day 1 he is in office.
EDIT:
Ok fine, I spent 3 hours compiling sources for all of these, you can find that below the cut.
I'll give at least one link per subject area. There are of course many more sources to be read on these subject areas and no post could possibly give someone a full education on these subjects.
Biden and trans rights: https://www.hrc.org/resources/president-bidens-pro-lgbtq-timeline
Trump and trans rights: https://www.aclu.org/news/lgbtq-rights/trump-on-lgbtq-rights-rolling-back-protections-and-criminalizing-gender-nonconformity
The two sources above show how Biden has done a lot of work to promote trans rights, and how Trump did a lot of work to hurt trans rights.
Biden on abortion access: https://www.cnn.com/2022/07/08/politics/what-is-in-biden-abortion-executive-order/index.html
Trump on abortion access: https://apnews.com/article/abortion-trump-republican-presidential-election-2024-585faf025a1416d13d2fbc23da8d8637
Biden openly supports access to abortion and has taken steps to protect those rights at a federal level even after Roe v Wade was overturned. Trump, on the other hand, was the man who appointed the judges who helped overturn Roe v Wade and he openly brags about how proud he is of that decision. He also states that he believes individual states should have the final say in whether or not abortion is legal, and that he trusts them to "do the right thing", meaning he supports stronger abortion bans.
Biden on environmental reform: https://www.whitehouse.gov/briefing-room/statements-releases/2021/10/07/fact-sheet-president-biden-restores-protections-for-three-national-monuments-and-renews-american-leadership-to-steward-lands-waters-and-cultural-resources/
Trump on environmental reform: https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2020/climate/trump-environment-rollbacks-list.html
Biden has made major steps forward for environmental reform. He has restored protections that Trump rolled back. He has enacted many executive orders and more to promote environmental protections, including rejoining the Paris Accords, which Trump withdrew the USA from. Trump is also well known for spreading conspiracy theories and lies about global climate change, calling it a "Chinese hoax".
Biden on healthcare and prescription reform: https://www.hhs.gov/about/news/2023/06/09/biden-administration-announces-savings-43-prescription-drugs-part-cost-saving-measures-president-bidens-inflation-reduction-act.html
Trump on healthcare reform: https://www.cnn.com/2024/01/07/politics/obamacare-health-insurance-ending-trump/index.html
I'm rolling healthcare and prescriptions and vaccines and public health all into one category here since they are related. Biden has lowered drug costs, expanded access to medicaid, and ACA enrollment has risen during his presidency. He has also made it so medical debt no longer applies to a person's credit score. He signed many executive orders during his first few weeks in office in order to get a handle on Trump's grievous mishandling of the COVID pandemic. Trump also wants to end the ACA. Trump is well known for refusing to wear a mask during the pandemic, encouraging the use of hydroxylchloroquine to "treat" COVID, and being openly anti-vaxx.
Biden on student loan forgiveness: https://www.ed.gov/news/press-releases/biden-harris-administration-announces-additional-77-billion-approved-student-debt-relief-160000-borrowers
Trump on student loan forgiveness: https://www.forbes.com/sites/adamminsky/2024/06/20/trump-knocks-bidens-vile-student-loan-forgiveness-plans-suggests-reversal/
Trump wants to reverse the student loan forgiveness plans Biden has enacted. Biden has already forgiven billions of dollars in loans and continues to work towards forgiving more.
Infrastructure funding:
I'm putting these links next together because they are all about infrastructure.
In general, Trump's "achievements" for infrastructure were to destroy environmental protections to speed up projects. Many of his plans were ineffective due to the fact that he did not clearly outline where the money was going to come from, and he was unwilling to raise taxes to pay for the projects. He was unable (and unwilling) to pass a bipartisan infrastructure bill during his 4 years in office. He did sign a few disaster relief bills. He did not enthusiastically promote renewable energy infrastructure. He created "Infrastructure Weeks" that the federal government then failed to fund. Trump did not do nothing for infrastructure, but his no-tax stance and his dislike for renewable energy means the contributions he made to American infrastructure were not as much as he claimed they were, nor as much as they could have been. Basically, he made a lot of promises, and delivered on very few of them. He is not "against" infrastructure, but he's certainly against funding it.
Biden was able to pass that bipartisan bill after taking office. The Bipartisan Infrastructure Plan that Trump tried to prevent from passing during Biden's term contains concrete funding sources and step by step plans to rebuild America's infrastructure. If you want to read the plan, you can find it here: https://www.whitehouse.gov/build/guidebook/. Biden has done far more for American infrastructure than Trump did, most notably by actually getting the bipartisan bill through congress.
Biden on Racial Equity: https://www.npr.org/sections/president-biden-takes-office/2021/01/26/960725707/biden-aims-to-advance-racial-equity-with-executive-actions
Trump on Racial Equity: https://www.axios.com/2024/04/01/trump-reverse-racism-civil-rights https://www.bbc.com/news/av/world-us-canada-37230916
Trump's racist policies are loud and clear for everyone to hear. We all heard him call Mexicans "Drug dealers, criminals, rapists". We all watched as he enacted travel bans on people from majority-Muslim nations. Biden, on the other hand, has done quite a lot during his term to attempt to reconcile racism in this country, including reversing Trump's "Muslim ban" the first day he was in office.
Biden on DEI: https://www.whitehouse.gov/briefing-room/presidential-actions/2021/06/25/executive-order-on-diversity-equity-inclusion-and-accessibility-in-the-federal-workforce/
Trump on DEI: https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/politics/trump-tried-to-crush-the-dei-revolution-heres-how-he-might-finish-the-job/ar-BB1jg3gz
Biden supports DEI and has signed executive orders and passed laws that support DEI on the federal level. Trump absolutely hates DEI and wants to eradicate it.
Biden on criminal justice reform: https://time.com/6155084/biden-criminal-justice-reform/
Trump on criminal justice reform: https://www.vox.com/2020-presidential-election/21418911/donald-trump-crime-criminal-justice-policy-record https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2024/05/trumps-extreme-plans-crime/678502/
From pardons for non-violent marijuana convictions to reducing the federal government's reliance on private prisons, Biden has done a lot in four years to reform our criminal justice system on the federal level. Meanwhile, Trump has described himself as "tough on crime". He advocates for more policing, including "stop and frisk" activities. Ironically it's actually quite difficult to find sources about what Trump thinks about crime, because almost all of the search results are about his own crimes.
Biden on military support for Israel: https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/national-security/biden-obama-divide-closely-support-israel-rcna127107
Trump on military support for Israel: https://www.vox.com/politics/353037/trump-gaza-israel-protests-biden-election-2024
Biden supports Israel financially and militarily and promotes holding Israel close. So did Trump. Trump was also very pro-Israel during his time in office and even moved the embassy to Jerusalem and declared Jerusalem the capitol of Israel, a move that inflamed attitudes in the region.
Biden on a ceasefire: https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2024/06/05/gaza-israel-hamas-cease-fire-plan-biden/73967659007/
Trump on a ceasefire: https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/donald-trump/trump-israel-gaza-finish-problem-rcna141905
Trump has tried to be quiet on the issue but recently said he wants Israel to "finish the problem". He of course claims he could have prevented the whole problem. Trump also openly stated after Oct 7th that he would bar immigrants who support Hamas from the country and send in officers to American protests to arrest anyone supporting Hamas.
Biden meanwhile has been quietly urging Netanyahu to accept a ceasefire deal for months, including the most recent announcement earlier in June, though it seems as though that deal has finally fallen through as well.
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I love it when top English students in my class (including me for some god forsaken reason) got the lowest and i mean the absolute lowest score in Thai
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Atlantis Squarepantis
Episode 92: Atlantis SquarePantis
“♪~ Good-bye, Atlantis. We’re Bikini Bottom bound. There’s no place like home! ~♪”
Synopsis: SpongeBob and friends take a trip to Atlantis, a lost city with all of their desires, but encounter some trouble when they destroy their most prized possession. Meanwhile, Patchy gets lost in the desert when his home town goes missing.
Well, everybody, here we are: review number one-hundred. When I first created this blog, I decided I’d tackle one of the movies every hundred episodes or so, including the two TV movies. Since TV movies are considerably smaller than regular movies, I figured this would be the first one I’d take on. Now before we dive in, I must say something about this episode: it is notoriously known as being one of the worst SpongeBob episodes of all time. Frequently criticized for its several musical numbers, meandering plot line, and so on and so forth. When watching this episode, I ultimately had to take into account a neutral perspective when reviewing this episode. Listen, in the past, I feel as though something I’ve done wrong is expecting an episode to be good or bad before viewing, and ultimately I feel that might make my reviews of said episodes a bit more biased. “Atlantis SquarePantis” is an episode I haven’t seen in ages, and really, I couldn’t really trust past judgement of the episode from myself. I am aware that this episode is widely considered to be bad, yes, but ultimately, I have had a few unpopular opinions in the past; might review “Stanley S. SquarePants” in the near future as an example. But nonetheless, let’s discuss my opinions on “Atlantis SquarePantis.”
SUMMARY:
While I did go into this episode with a neutral perspective, the honest truth is simply… yeah, it isn’t very good. I could just end the review there, but listen, is that really what you want to see out of a one-hundredth review? Nah. However, before I go on and give actual opinions, let’s get all the little nitpicks that people blow up way too much out of the way.
“This episode is a Charlie and the Chocolate Factory ripoff!” Listen, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is one of those stock plots that so many cartoons rely on from time to time. This episode is no less a rip-off of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory than say, “Squidtastic Voyage” is to Fantastic Voyage. I might take off a few points for using a stock-plot for the show’s first TV movie, but frankly trying to consider it a rip-off is a pretty lame argument about this episode.
“Why doesn’t David Bowie get a musical number?” Listen, I’m gonna get it out of the way: David Bowie was a pretty terrible person, if my memory serves right. However, once again, while I will take points off for hiring a famous musician in a musical episode and not having him sing, it’s frankly the least of my concerns. When watching this episode, really I wasn’t wondering so much “When will LRH get a musical number?” because the musical numbers aren’t really what I’m watching this episode for. Of course, musical numbers can help episodes go from being good to great, like “Band Geeks” and the recent “Mimic Madness,” but as a whole, they aren’t anything that concerns me much in an episode.
And while there are far too many songs, I mostly had a neutral opinion on them. They’re nothing I’d seek down and listen to, but it wasn’t like “Oh dear Neptune just let it end” whenever I heard one. They’re pretty middle-of-the-road SpongeBob songs that ultimately don’t really bother me all that much.
While all those things are kinda bad, they ultimately don’t contribute much to my overall opinion of the episode. If there’s really a big issue I have with this episode, it’s how little really happens for the time it’s worth. Many of the issues this episode has can be seen in my reviews for an episode like “The Cent of Money” or “The Clash of Triton.” However, I do feel “Atlantis SquarePantis” is a little above those episodes.
For reference, in “Atlantis SquarePantis,” SpongeBob and Patrick are enjoying a nice day blowing bubbles, when they are disappointed with how briefly they last. SpongeBob decides to attempt blowing a long-lasting bubble, but it ends up carrying him and Patrick to a cave, where they find half of the Amulet of Atlantis. They go to the museum, where they find Squidward, Mr. Krabs, and Sandy, who all talk about their dreams in the lost city. Seeing the lost half of the Amulet of Atlantis, they manage to re-join it, and fly through a song-filled bus to the lost city, where everyone gets lost in their desires. SpongeBob and Patrick find the oldest-living bubble and get freaked out when they accidentally pop it, but ultimately it doesn’t mean much because it’s not even the real bubble; but then they do pop the real bubble and kinda piss off the Atlantian guards, and Plankton has a kinda shoehorned in plot about getting Atlantian weapons for unknown purposes. They fly home, missing Atlantis, and yadda-yadda. This plot would be fine for an episode anywhere between eleven and twenty minutes; probably working best as one of those half-specials, along the lines of “Back to the Past” and “Shanghaied.” And ultimately, that’s really the episode’s biggest fault: it just feels… padded out. It feels like an episode that was intended to be much shorter, but was extended just so the show could have a TV movie or get higher ratings or something.
Patchy also gets a subplot that’s equally as uninteresting. Patchy gets stuck in traffic waiting for the new SpongeBob, but ends up realizing his home town of Encino, California has disappeared somehow. Patchy gets stranded in the desert, looking for Encino, only to have weird hallucinations, feed a sandwich to a vulture, and eventually discover the town was shrunken by Space Aliens. Part of me wants to give the highlight of the episode to the weird live-action SpongeBob costumes, but it’s more funny in a “what-the-heck” kind of way than in an actually, legitimately funny way.
What puts “Atlantis SquarePantis” above other similarly boring episodes is that while, yes, the plot is pretty meandering and pointless, it at least enjoys a bit of fun with the medium. A few different animation styles appear in this episode, and while the one in Mr. Krabs’s song feels kinda cheap, and the one in Squidward’s doesn’t make nearly the use of the different paintings it should, it still is a nice change of pace for the series. I actually do really like the art style in Sandy’s song, which kind of takes an ol’ 16-bit SNES look to it, with some surprisingly fluid animation. Might just be personal tastes, though.
The biggest issue with the episode is that it really goes nowhere. Everything ultimately just leads to another anticlimax, but not even really a funny one. So SpongeBob and Patrick popped the bubble, but surprise it wasn’t the real one. Plankton gets advanced weaponry but nope it just fires ice cream. Ultimately, each time it feels a conflict is about to build up, it just kinda ends with some dull anticlimax. An episode with low stakes can occasionally work on, perhaps, an eleven minute-or-shorter level, like “Patrick! The Game.” However, when aiming to create a TV movie, ultimately, having an episode with as little climax as this one ultimately just feels boring. I do not recommend “Atlantis SquarePantis,” no, but admittedly, I don’t really feel that that mad at it. It feels like just a generic kinda dull SpongeBob episode with a lot of padding. None of the padding is really grating or obnoxious, just dull. “Atlantis SquarePantis” is an episode that I can’t really think of much reason to hate with all my heart. Yeah, it’s bad, and pretty dang bad at that, but it doesn’t give much reason for seething hatred. Once it’s over, it’s over, and well, there’s nothing you’re really feeling aside from “did I really just spend forty minutes on that?”
RECAP:
THE GOOD:
“Atlantis SquarePantis’s” biggest strength is that it does manage to have some interesting formats that wouldn’t be shown in your average episode. It’s one of the few things that could make this episode feel “special” when compared to others.
I’ll hand this episode that it did get a handful of laughs out of me, particularly the “I Hate Mondays” gag, but nothing too fantastic.
THE BAD:
The songs, while nothing abominable, are pretty forgettable, and definitely have those rhymes which just feel… forced. You know, the melons with edible rinds, the looking great on the side of a van, etc.
The plot really just meanders a lot. For a 40-minute long episode, it ultimately did nothing that a 22 or even 11-minute long episode couldn’t cover.
Plankton’s side-plot is entirely unnecessary.
This episode hardly has any climax. There’s a kinda neat fight sequence with Sandy and the Atlantians, but it’s so brief that in the grand scheme of things, it may as well be just a little more filler, since even it hardly leads anywhere in the end.
VERDICT:
I’m sorry to say, but this one-hundredth review is probably going to be as anti-climactic as the episode it is for. I was expecting something I could tear to shreds, or really just despise with every inch of my being, but ultimately… I couldn’t think of too much to say. There are many small things that are wrong here, but none of them are really wrong enough to fill my heart with rage or anything of that sort. It’s just dull, and forgettable. Really, the only question I should be asking is why watch this when there are multitudes of eleven minute episodes that tell better stories with more humor? Throw together “Married to Money,” “Life Insurance,” “Kracked Krabs,” and “Krusty Krushers” and you’d probably have a more worth-while forty minutes than watching this episode. Really, this is one that is difficult to give a final score to. It’s bad? Yeah. And frankly, it doesn’t really have major redeeming qualities. Ultimately, though I just can’t gather up the anger to rate it anything lower than…
FINAL SCORE: 3/10
Worse than the average 3/10 episode, but ultimately, it was just another boring, inoffensive episode of SpongeBob. A 3/10 is what I’d rate another episode of that sort, and TV movies aren’t held to any other standards. I’d definitely avoid this episode, it hardly does anything in the forty minutes it lasts, but that “hardly anything” can be said for both the good and bad.
THE SIDE-NOTES:
While it did get the same score as “What Ever Happened to SpongeBob?,” how it got the score was in a very different way. While “What Ever Happened to SpongeBob?” had a somewhat compelling story, the humor was lacking, and the episode just felt a tad too depressing to really enjoy. “Atlantis SquarePantis” achieves the score on sheer account of just doing nothing that I can really appreciate, while having nothing loathesome to really rant against.
I guess this still lines up with my “every ten episodes review something infamous” rule.
Time to count down to my review of The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie! Only 100 more reviews to go!
So Atlantis has outgrown the needs for currency and warfare? Heck, they just need to ditch the monarchy and I’d be packing my bags and heading straight for that town.
Just getting back to reviewing run-of-the-mill episodes will feel so weird now. It’s like, “Hey! Here’s a review of a TV movie! And now here’s a review of uh… ‘Wishing You Well.’”
Yeah I’m gonna review “Wishing You Well” next. I got a request for it a couple months back so… yeah let’s do that.
<<PREVIOUS REVIEW: MARRIED TO MONEY NEXT REVIEW: WISHING YOU WELL>>
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Miami Heat vs Denver Nuggets Game 2 Highlights
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#all videos are edited to follow the "Free Use" guideline of YouTube Gabe Vincent scored 23 points#and with a chance to tie#erasing an eight-point deficit going into the final frame. And even then#gilas#Jamal Murray missed a 3-pointer at the buzzer. Murray had 18 points and 10 assists for Denver#jessica sojo#Jimmy Butler and Bam Adebayo each had 21 and the Miami Heat evened up the NBA Finals by overcoming a monster effort from Nikola Jokic to bea#kapuso mo#kmjs#Miami Heat vs Denver Nuggets Game 2 Highlights DISCLAIMER - All clips property of the NBA. No copyright infringement is intended#nba#noypi alliance#pba#the last of those shots a 4-footer with 36 seconds left to get the Nuggets within three. Denver elected not to foul on the ensuing Miami pos#then got down by as many as 15 before reclaiming the lead in the fourth. Miami outscored Denver 36-25 in the final period#they had to dig deep to finish it off. Jokic scored 41 points and was 16 of 28 from the floor#tulfo#while Aaron Gordon had 12 points and Bruce Brown scored 11. Game 3 is Wednesday in Miami. Denver had been 11-0 with a double-digit lead in t#who had a big early lead#Youtube
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❝ darling, j. bellingham. ❞ ┉
⁎⠀┉⠀summary: your boyfriend jude has been nothing but sweet the entire time you've been together. who knew a number 10 jersey with his name on the back would affect him so much?
⁎⠀┉⠀author's note: first lil fic for jude <3. partially inspired by the 3-0 win over greece, but if it happened at wembley instead. really tried with the brit slang, someone pls confirm if it's shirt instead of jersey lol. day seven of my no nut november series.
⁎⠀┉⠀warnings: smut, please do not interact with my work if you are under 18. language, established relationship, trent being trent, oral fixation (kinda), oral sex (69), american writing english people.
⁎⠀┉⠀pairing: jude bellingham x reader.
⁎⠀┉⠀word count: 2.2k.
"You look stunning babes!" Tolami practically shrieked as your approached the cluster of WAGs, her eyes sparkling with excitement. The group of stylish women, all dressed to the nines in various shades of red and white to support the team, were huddled together, greeting each other after several months away at their partners' respective clubs. You had gone all out for today's match, your nails painted in the team's colors and your hair styled in perfectly poised waves that highlighted your cheekbones and the delicate gold hoops that danced against your neck.
"Thanks, love," you replied with a warm smile, giving your friend a quick hug. "I couldn't be caught looking anything less than leng next to you."
You glanced around the exclusive VIP area, your eyes scanning the pitch where the players were beginning their warm-ups. The electric atmosphere of the stadium was palpable, the throb of excitement pulsing through the air. The scent of freshly cut grass and the distant murmur of the crowd grew louder as you and Tolami took their seats.
During the match, your eyes never left Jude. His agility and precision on the pitch were mesmerizing, and you couldn't help but feel a swell of pride watching him command the midfield. Each time he looked up at your section, his gaze searching for yours, you felt a flutter in your stomach. When he scored the game's second goal with a powerful strike from just outside the box, the women erupted in cheers, and you were on your feet, your hands covering your mouth in shock and delight.
After the final whistle, the team huddled together, their faces a mix of exhaustion and exhilaration. The crowd's roar was deafening as the players began to make their way towards the tunnel, and your heart raced in anticipation. He raised his hand up, gesturing for you to wait, and you nodded, your cheeks heating up under the ooh's of the other girls.
Once the team had disappeared into the depths of the stadium, you made your way down to the VIP lounge. The thrill of victory still hung in the air, mingling with the faint scent of sweat and the tang of energy drinks. You chatted idly with Tolami and Megan as you waited for the players to emerge from the locker room, your laughter echoing off the walls. When Jude finally appeared, Trent Alexander-Arnold by his side, your shoulder relaxed in relief.
"Y/N," the Liverpool man called out to you, a knowing smile playing on his lips. "How's Jude holding up with that No Nut November bet? You keeping him honest, yeah?"
You rolled your eyes, unable to suppress a sigh at the juvenile banter that was a staple of the footballers' friendship. "Unfortunately, he's been a saint."
"It's only a matter of time before Trent gives up," Jude said, his own grin spreading as he approached the group of you. "Don't jinx it."
You playfully swiped at him, your eyes lighting up. "You know I believe in you."
Jude leaned down to kiss your cheek. "Thanks for the vote of confidence," he murmured, his voice low and teasing.
As the two of you walked out of the stadium, the cool evening air a welcome contrast to the heat of the game, Jude's hand found yours, his grip firm and possessive. The short drive to your flat seemed to take forever, the silence between you charged with unspoken thoughts. The streets of London were alive with fans, their cheers and chants a distant backdrop to your own private world.
Once inside, you slipped out of your shoes with a sigh of relief, and Jude's eyes followed your every move. He couldn't take his gaze off the England crest and his name emblazoned on the back of your shirt.
"You know, it's weird," he began, his voice a little rough. "Seeing you with my name on your back... it's like you're mine. Like, really mine."
You turned to face him, a smirk playing on your lips. "Is that all it takes to make me yours?"
Jude took a step closer, his eyes darkening. "You know it's more than that, babe." He reached out, his fingers tracing the letters of his surname on the fabric of your shirt. "But seeing you wear this, supporting me with my name on your back, it just makes me want to show you off."
You felt a thrill run through you at his words. You stepped closer, looking up at him with a mischievous glint in your eyes. "What's stopping you, Bellingham?"
Jude didn't need any further encouragement. He pulled you into his arms, kissing you with a hunger that surprised you. His hands roamed over your body, his fingers playing with the hem of your shirt. You could feel his heart racing against your chest, the warmth of his skin melting through the cool material of the shirt. You stumbled into the bedroom, your kisses growing more urgent as you went.
You broke away, your breathing heavy, and looked at him with a glint of challenge in your eyes. "You know, if you want to keep that bet with Trent..."
Jude's smoldering gaze stuck to your face as he peeled the shirt over your head, revealing the lacy lingerie you had chosen just in case. "We don't have to tell him," he murmured against your neck, his teeth grazing your skin lightly as his voice rumbled deliciously down your spine.
With a laugh that was half moan, you stepped away from him, slipping out of your jeans. "You're so full of it," you said, your voice breathless with excitement. "You can't just cheat your way out of a bet. What's the point?"
Jude's eyes never left yours as he shed his own clothes, his eyes dark with desire. "Who said anything about cheating?" he murmured, advancing on you with a predatory grace. "I'm just saying, a man's got needs, and you're looking too good. Who am I to resist what's mine?"
You felt a shiver of excitement run down your spine as Jude reached out, his fingertips tracing the edge of your bra. The anticipation was almost too much to bear, the air between the two of you crackling with sexual tension. "You're insatiable," you whispered, your voice a little shaky.
"Just for you," Jude said, his voice a gruff promise. He cupped your face in his hands, his thumbs brushing over your cheekbones as he kissed you again, deep and demanding. His touch was possessive, leaving no doubt in your mind that he meant every word. Your own hands roamed over his muscular chest, nails scraping lightly against his skin.
With a growl, he picked you up, carrying you to the bed as if you weighed nothing at all. You wrapped your legs around his waist, your body fitting against his like they were two pieces of a puzzle. The bedroom was a blur of movement as you tumbled onto the bed, the soft sheets contrasting with the hardness of his body. Jude's kisses grew more insistent, his tongue exploring the depths of your mouth as his hands moved to the clasp of your bra.
The sound of the fabric giving way was lost in your muffled moans. His thumbs grazed your nipples, sending a jolt of pleasure through your body. You arched into his touch, your skin flushing with desire. "Jude," you gasped, your voice a whimper of need. He broke the kiss, his eyes raking over your exposed chest with a look that seemed to blister your skin.
Without wasting a moment, Jude's mouth found your breasts, his teeth grazing the sensitive peaks before his tongue swirled around them. Your breath hitched, your fingernails digging into his back as the sensation washed over you. "Jude, more, please," you begged, your voice a throaty whisper. Jude's mouth continued its movements as he complied, his teeth tugging gently before his mouth closed around your nipple, suckling with a fervor that had your back arching off the bed.
Jude's hands roamed your body, his thumbs dipping into your waistband to tease the sensitive flesh just above your hips. Your hands weren't idle either, exploring the planes of his back, your nails scraping against the firm muscles as you pulled him closer.
With a sudden jolt of energy, you rolled the two of you over so you were on top, straddling him. "My turn," you whispered, your eyes sparkling with arousal. Your fingers traced the line of his jaw before you leaned down to kiss him, your teeth grazing his bottom lip before your tongue darted out to taste him. His hands moved to your hips, his grip tightening as you began to rock against him, feeling his length grow beneath you.
Jude's breath hitched as you kissed along his neck, your teeth scraping the sensitive skin just enough to make him shiver. He could feel the heat building between you two, the need growing more intense with every passing moment. "Serena," he groaned, his voice thick with want.
With a wicked smile, you slid off him, your eyes studying his face as you reached for his boxers. You took your time, enjoying the way his body reacted to your every touch. Finally, you pulled them down, revealing his hard length. You took him in your hand, stroking him gently, watching his reaction with a sense of power that thrilled you to the core.
Jude's eyes rolled back, his hips bucking upward as you touched him. "Fuck," he muttered, his hand coming up to cover yours, guiding your movements. "You're killing me, babe."
Your smile grew wider as you leaned into him, your breath hot against his skin. "Good things come to those who wait," you sang under your breath, your teeth grazing his earlobe. You kissed a trail down his chest, your tongue tracing the lines of his abs before finally reaching his cock. You took him into your mouth, the velvet heat of your lips wrapping around him, your tongue swirling in a way that made him groan.
His hands tangled in your hair as you took him deeper, your movements deliberate and teasing. He could feel the tension in his body winding tighter and tighter, the urge to push you down and fuck you senseless growing stronger with every passing second. "Babe, hold on," he ground out, his voice tight with restraint. "Sit on my face, 69. Wanna taste you."
With a light giggle, you complied, straddling his head. The scent of your arousal filled the room, making his mouth water as his tongue found your clit. You gasped, your movements faltering as you focused on the delicious sensation of his mouth on you. Your hand stroked him in time with his tongue, the sound of your moans mixing with the wetness of your desire.
Your body began to tense, your movements growing more frantic as you felt the orgasm building within you. Jude's hands gripped your thighs, holding you in place as he continued to devour you, his tongue flicking and swirling in a pattern that had you seeing stars. "Oh god," you whispered, your voice a hoarse plea.
Jude felt your thighs tighten around his head, your body shaking with the beginnings of climax. With a triumphant groan, he pushed his tongue deeper, feeling your muscles spasm as you came. Your hips rocked against his face, your tongue still working his cock. The sensation was overwhelming, and with a final, desperate stroke, he too reached the edge, his body tensing as he released into your mouth.
You sat up, swiping your tongue across your lips, a smug smile playing on your face as you turned to face your boyfriend. Jude all but whimpered as your mouth fell open to reveal you had swallowed him completely. With a giggle, you watched as Jude lay there, his chest heaving, his eyes closed in bliss.
"All this over a shirt?" you teased, your voice filled with a mix of satisfaction and amusement.
"It's not just the shirt," he murmured, his eyes finally opening to meet yours. "It's knowing that you're mine, that you're supporting me in every way possible." He reached up, his fingers tracing the outline of your cheek, his thumb brushing over your bottom lip. "That I'm the one who gets to take you home after games like this."
The words sent a thrill through you, and you leaned down to kiss him deeply, tasting yourself on his lips. Jude's arms wrapped around you, pulling you closer, his hands roaming over your body in a silent show of strength and possession.
Your bodies were slick with sweat, your hearts pounding in unison as you broke away, panting for air. Jude rolled you over again, his muscles flexing as he positioned himself above you, his cock still hard and demanding. "Round two?" he asked, his voice a seductive purr.
Your eyes widened, your chest heaving with the aftershocks of pleasure. "You're unbelievable," you whispered, but you didn't protest as he nudged your thighs apart. Jude's gaze was intense, his eyes dark with lust as he settled between your legs, his cock pressing against your entrance. You felt the heat of him, the promise of more pleasure, and you wrapped your legs around his waist, urging him closer.
#&. cassie writes.#&. nnn masterlist.#jude bellingham x reader#jude bellingham#jude bellingham fic#jude bellingham smut#jude bellingham imagine#jude bellingham x black reader#jude bellingham fanfic#jude bellingham x you#black!fem!reader#x black fem reader#black!reader#black!oc#x black reader
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Post Tension | Charles Leclerc x McLaren! Reader
Summary: Back in the same country, Charles realises that the most important thing isn't winning; it's that he was wrong.
Warnings: Swearing, female reader, Verstappen! Reader. Tooth-rotting fluff.
This is the final part!
Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3
Main Masterlist
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YourUserName just posted
liked by arthur_leclerc, kellypiquet and others
YourUserName something in the orange tells me we're not done
7,956 comments
User 1 excuse me, miss thing?!?!
User 2 not miss verstappen posting this on media day when charles and her were spotted in the background of each other's interviews
francisca.cgomes that silhoutte pic is serving 🔥
User 3 just me or does that bear have a ferrari hoodie on
User 4 he is not the love of your life. he is literally just a guy. hit him with your car
→ User 1 nah 'cause does anyone else think charles would run her off the track if she got ahead of him again
→ User 5 wtf that's his girlfriend? he wouldn't try and hurt her
→ User 6 he did push max in a puddle once
lilymhe @ alex_albon why don't you buy me this stuff
→ alex_albon because you don't support McLaren
→ YourUserName excuse me?!?! what is this betrayal
→ lilymhe @ YourUserName i can explain
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User 7 mum and dad putting those cheating rumours to rest
User 8 y/n a stronger woman than me because i would've keyed his car for implying i was sleeping with my teammate
→ User 9 actually it was arthur who implied that
→ User 10 don't drag baby leclerc into this. he was fighting in the trenches alongside us for his otp
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scuderiaferrari just posted
liked by pierregasly, carlossainz55 and others
scuderiaferrari P4 and P8. A strong weekend for the tifosi 💪
tagged: charles_leclerc, carlossainz55
6,459 comments
User 9 i can't decide what i want to ride more
User 10 scoring some points in azerbaijan. well done, team
charles_leclerc why are you not posting the photos of me being #1 wag
→ YourUserName because this account doesn't post papaya, liefje
→ charles_leclerc no excuse
→ lilymhe because you are not #1 wag, clearly i am the only wag for @ YourUserName
→ charles_leclerc defamation
→ YourUserName @ lilymhe you tell 'em, bby
→ alex_albon i leave you alone for two seconds and you're stealing my girlfriend again
User 11 be still my beating heart
mclaren just posted
liked by charles_leclerc, georgerussell63 and others
mclaren P3 and P5. roll on the points for team papaya (ft mclaren's #1 wag)
tagged: YourUserName
7,321 comments
mclaren we apologise for interrupting your regularly scheduled papaya posts with a splash of red but you'll never guess who this racer was looking at to make him smile like that
→ maxverstappen1 sickening
→ charles_leclerc i am honoured to be awarded such a prestigious title by team mclaren
→ landonorris does this mean i can stop pretending to like y/n now?
→ charles_ leclerc @ landonorris no
→ YourUserName @ landonorris no. you're my emotional support pookie
User 11 so proud of our papayas. they did so good this weekend
User 12 i'd let y/n hit me with her car
liked by charles_leclerc
victoriaverstappen couldn't be prouder of you! 💕
maxverstappen1 just posted
liked by victoriaverstappen, kellypiquet and others
maxverstappen1 a disappointing dnf but very pleased for the less-famous verstappen 🧡
8,066 comments
redbullracing still made us proud. we'll come back stronger in france
kellypiquet well done y/n. p was cheering you on
→ YourUserName tell her i'm coming over for a pizza party soon! 🥰
YourUserName i swear he loves me really, guys
→ charles_leclerc well he threatened to run me off the track if i didn't fix things so i'd say he does
→ maxverstappen1 for legal reasons, this is a joke
→ YourUserName ah, so that's why you apologised. not because of your undying love for me
landonorris feel like that should say the more talented verstappen
liked by YourUserName, charles_leclerc
danielricciardo don't let this fool you. the man was close to tears when y/n was p1 with just one lap to go
→ danielricciardo and then cried when her tire burst
→ danielricciardo and then cried when she finished p3
→ maxverstappen1 i'll sue you for defemation
→ User13 the Grid seemed to have learned a new word this week
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YourUserName just posted
liked by landonorris, maxverstappen1 and others
YourUserName ik houd van je
tagged: charles_leclerc
6,124 comments
charles_lecerlc je sais
→ YourUserName never going to let me forget that one, are you
→ charles_leclerc no
→ maxverstappen1 no
→ danielricciardo no
→ landonorris no
→ arthur_leclerc no
→ pierregasly no
→ victoriaverstappen no
→ lilymhe no
YourUserName how about everybody get off my dick
→ YourUserName my only friends here are the lovely ladies thirsting over my hot boyfriend with me
→ User 14 you tell 'em, honey
charles_leclerc just posted
liked by landonorris, redbullracing and others
charles_lecerlc as the people on twitter say, i would let y/n hit me with her car
8,593 comments
maxverstappen1 my eyes 🤮
→ charles_leclerc look away! i was going to block you for this
→ maxverstappen1 block me forever
YourUserName wow, not even a tag.
→ charles_leclerc everyone knows who you belong to, mon amour
→ YourUserName yeah, the guy who invented ice cream
→ landonorris @ charles_leclerc at least you know what to do if the racing thing doesn't work out
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Thank you for all the support shown on this series. I never expected such a response when I posted my silly little fic.
I've had so much fun making these. I have a few more ideas coming up but not loads so if you have any, please do request and I'll try my best to do them justice! <3
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Tag list: @mehrmonga @luvsforme @lemon-lav @missenclod @halleest @formula1mount @k4marina @evie-119 @letmeseeyougotowork @sleepybrokenmelle @eiaaasamantha @tinyhrry @janeholt3 @allywthsr @callsignwidow @raizelchrysanderoctavius @prudyhoo @valentinanappipage @leah-also-known-as-creatoronwp @delululeclerc @e-nonsense @scott-mccall-could-lift-mjolnir @butterfliesflyaroundmymind @bloodyymaryyy @kqliie @lifeless-firefly @woozarts @silverxxs-world @personwhoisther @eugene-emt-roe @anthonykatebridgerton @qualitygiantshoepsychic @entr4p3 @carpediem241108 @forevercaffeinated-lee @xyzstar @theendofthematerialgworl @geniusalpaca @chfiosr
#formula 1#f1#formula 1 smau#f1 smau#formula 1 social media au#f1 social media au#social media au imagine#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 headcanon#formula 1 one shot#formula 1 fluff#formula 1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 drabble#f1 headcanon#f1 one shot#f1 fluff#f1 x reader#charles leclerc#charles leclerc imagine#charles leclerc drabble#charles leclerc headcanon#charles leclerc one shot#charles leclerc smau#charles leclerc fluff#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc x verstappen reader#max verstappen
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YEAAAAH girlboss ibara is finally mine 😭💖
#you may say 'finally? theres still three days of the event left' and yeah true#but lets put it this way: i just got this card and i have 2.78 million event points LMAO#ive been making my merry 3/3/3/10 way through the map and finally cleared day 30#(okay some days i just did 3 bp on all songs of a day bc some of the missions make it so#you cant get a good enough score on the 4th song for the 10bp to be worth it.....)#i can finally autolive for the rest of the event except for the starry lives <333#i havent read the event story yet bc manually playing so many songs every day takes a lot of energy#so i can finally get to that!#hmmm also since theres 3 days left and only 222k more event points i need to get i can safely say#that as long as you have at least a copy of the bonus 4* and 3* cards and your cards are good enough#to get a score of over 3 million on songs of any color you can definitely get both of the 5 stars without dia#next time i want to get both of the 5 stars i should do it with no bonus to see how close you can get......#and guess what the next tour event is the antique market one so i obv do want both lol so there you go#if i can do it with less than 2k dia i will already be happy
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Indycar crash course
(For this all I’m just going to use 2024 as an example)
I hope this is helpful feel free to ask any questions!!
1. Teams/drivers
* There is no limit on how few or many drivers can race for a single team.
* Most teams have 3 cars but some have as low as 2 and others have as high as 5
* Drivers don’t have numbers, the cars/teams do (ex: David is car #66 but will change to #41 when he changes to Aj Foyt racing)
* Additional Teams/drivers will come in for the Indy 500
2. Circuits
* circuit types – from road and street circuits to short ovals (one mile or less) and long ovals, often referred to as superspeedways.
* From what I have seen most Indycar drivers like/prefer ovals
3. Chassis and engines
* Dallara is the exclusive chassis supplier for INDYCAR. The chassis is made of carbon fibre, Kevlar and other composites, and weighs approximately 770 kg.
* Chevrolet and Honda are the two engine manufactures in the series and supply competitors
4. Tyres
* Like Formula 1, INDYCAR has a sole tyre supplier. But instead of Pirelli rubber, INDYCAR uses Firestone.
* Firestone provides three types of tyres for road and street courses, and one for ovals. On road and street courses, there is the ‘primary’ black tyre. The ‘alternate’ red tyre is a softer compound that allows for higher speeds but wears faster. A grey sidewall tyre is used in wet weather conditions.
* On ovals, only the ‘primary’ black tyre is used and if the rain falls at this type of circuit, Indy cars will not take to the track.
5. Aeroscreen
* In Formula 1, the teams have the halo. In INDYCAR, the aeroscreen is a ballistic, canopy-like windscreen anchored by titanium framework surrounding the cockpit.
6. Race weekend format
* The format of race weekends changes from race to race, however the most common is that Friday consists of two practice sessions – one in the morning and one in the afternoon.
* On Saturday, there is a morning practice session followed by qualifying in the afternoon.
* Sunday is race day and it begins with a warm-up session at road and street courses. However, on oval circuits there is no warm-up session.
7. Pit Stops
* Unlike Formula 1 where 16 team members assist during a pit-stop, just seven members of each INDYCAR team are permitted go ‘over the wall’ to execute a pit-stop.
* Team members include: four tyre changers, a fueler, a person responsible for the air jack (to raise the car to change the tyres) and an aeroscreen assistant to clean or pull a ‘tear-off’ from screen to help the driver’s vision.
* Each crew member is required wear a firesuit and helmet for protection.
* Indy cars refuel at each stop and drivers pit depending on the length of the track. In the 10 seconds it takes to fuel the car, all four tyres are changed.
8. Point scoring
* Points are awarded for all finishing positions in INDYCAR.
* First – 50 points, second – 40, third – 35, fourth – 32, fifth – 30, sixth – 28, and so on, going down to just five points for the lowest finishing position in the field.
* Bonus points are awarded for: pole position – 1 point, leading at least one race lap – 1 point, and most race laps led – 2 points.
* For the Indianapolis 500 and the final race of the season, points are doubled in those races.
TEAMS (as of end 2024 season)
1. AJ Foyt Racing
* 14 Santino Ferrucci
* 41 Sting Ray Robb
2. Andretti Global
* 26 Colton Herta
* 27 Kyle Kirkwood (logan’s friend !!)
* 28 Marcus Ericsson
3. Arrow McLaren
* 5 Pato O’Ward (McLaren reserve driver)
* 7 Alex Rossi
* 6 Nolan Siegel
4. Chip Ganassi Racing
* 8 Linus Lundqvist
* 9 Scott Dixon
* 10 Álex Paluo Montalbo
* 4 Kyffin Simpson
5. Dale Coyne Racing
* 51 Katherine Legge
* 18 Jack Harvey
6. Ed Carpenter Racing
* 20 Christian Rasmussen
* 20 Ed Carpenter (ovals only)
* 21 Rinus Veekay
7. Juncos Hollinger Racing
* 77 Romain Grosjean
* 78 Conor Daly
8. Meyer Shank Racing
* 66 David Malukas
* 60 Felix Rosenqvist
9. Rahal Letterman Lanigan Racing
* 15 Graham Rahal
* 45 Christian Lundgaard
* 30 Pietro Fittipaldi
10. Team Penske
* 2 Josef Newgarden
* 3 Scott McLaughlin (twt icon)
#indycar#indy 500#f1#formula 1#logan sargeant#ls2#david malukas#pato o'ward#kyle kirkwood#josef newgarden#arrow mclaren#mclaren
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omg being a composer SUCKS lol, its literally just working your ass off for an intensive competition that calls for the randomest instrument combinations and insanest requirements known to man, which means you DONT have a piece that fits those requirements, which means you have to write something new FROM SCRATCH in a very short period of time only for you to not even win loool and then you have a Very Specific piece that doesnt fit in any other call for scores lool
#man this 2023 is the year of entering ALL CALL FOR SCORES AND COMPETITIONS#okay maybe not all because some of them have lik 70 dollar entry fee like come on man. come on#also some of them ideologically ARE INCOMPATIBLE#but anyway you get the idea#i mean if we try to be positive i guess i'd say that at least those intensive composing sessions DO make you improve#sometimes. sometimes you just present a garbage#anyway regardless of where i am and where i am not successful in these submissions#i actually have A LOT to compose anyway. bassonist asked for his piece.a sextet asked for a piece as well. and i still have to finish#my horn piece. WHICH i finally got to complete my second draft of today!#might need maybe 1-3 more drafts before its Done Done though. oh god. feeling a bit overwhelmed in this chilis#for like the past week ive been doing quite well. been quite productive and working during the day. but that doesnt stop me from#losing my absolute shit every night because im like AA AI HAVE SO MUCH TO DO AAAA#i need to calm down#i have a trio that is technically done but it could be better but i never got to revise it properly.and theres a call for scores i could#submit it it thats due january 10#so this weekend im going to revise it like a madman. i am DETERMINED to send something in#i think that pressure will make the trio a lot better#maybe not exactly where i want it to be because its going to be a job i do only in a weekedn#but hey!#i bet on monday its going to be so much better than it looks today
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Part 11: Free Fall
Masterlist - Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10 - Part 12
How many nights did you wish someone would stay? (Lie awake only hoping they're okay?)
(In which an angst writer makes her comeback in more ways than one)
Pairing: Paige Bueckers X Azzi Fudd
Themes: Angst, Fluff if you squint?
Words: 8.0K
TW: Swearing (that's probably it?)
A/N: Hello my lovelies <3 Y'all are the sweetest people ever for being so patient with me but it's finally here! I'm hoping that I don't put y'all through this again but it is almost finals season so...fingers crossed. While you read this chapter, I'd like y'all to keep in mind how much you love me and how much y'all wanted a new chapter and of course my favorite phrase: for the plot! I tried to edit but I hate reading my own work back and so it's not as thorough as it should be and there's probably typos so lemme know. As always, let me know what you liked, what you didn't and what you'd like to see next. Have a lovely week my angels!
May 2025
It’s her first ever WNBA game -Dallas Wings vs Washington Mystics- and the first thing Paige notices as she steps onto the court is that the two courtside seats right by the Mystics bench are empty. The sound of music streaming through the speakers clashes against the raucous crowds; the lights are dimmed and there’s a riveting thrum of energy swirling the arena in anticipation for a generational talent’s professional debut. Paige has spent the days leading up to her first game immersed in basketball. Since training camps, she hasn’t let herself think of anything except how to make sure the ball went through the hoops, how to make sure the person in front of her didn’t score, how to win.
It’s easier that way. Because then she doesn’t have to think about how empty and cold her bed feels at night, doesn’t have to think about how much she craves to press call on a number she knows she should have blocked, doesn’t have to think about how the pieces of her shattered world are barely bound together by a tape of pretend. Paige can’t think of any of that and so she’s spent every second awake, clearing her head of all potential distractions and focusing on preparing for this moment.
Except, the moment is here now.
And all Paige can fixate on is the empty courtside seats.
The memories come back to her in waves; the two of them in those seats, pressed together -as close as it could be acceptable for their façade of best friends to be- as they weaved dreams of it being their turn on the professional stage. If she listens closely, Paige swears that amidst the chaos, she can still hear the echo of a promise that had once been made casually in conversation.
“When you play here for the first time, I’ll be right here cheering you on. Every single time.”
Another broken promise.
The truth is that the last few weeks as much as it’s felt like Paige is walking on a carpet of roses, there have been countless sharp thorns woven through the petals. She’s tried to avoid them -focusing on what she had, instead of what she’d lost- but they’d found a way to perforate through her skin anyways. And Paige knows she’s bleeding but she can’t scream, so she swallows the pain away instead. Memories of the past are piercing her feet and it feels like she’s leaving a trail of it feels incomplete without you behind her as she navigates the journey through her present, stepping towards a future that would be nothing like the one she’d imagined when she’d been a naive girl sitting in those courtside seats.
The courtside seats that are empty tonight.
Really it’s exactly what she should’ve expected. And there’s something so final about this moment, like the last flicker of a candle that had burned in secret. Paige hadn’t even realized she was still holding out for something but as she drags her eyes away from the seats and towards her father and brother who are practically vibrating with pride, she can feel the tautness of the string that she’d held onto. Because she hasn't told them; hasn’t told anybody about the breakup.
Something about vocalizing it had felt just a little too real and Paige had evaded any potential situation that would warrant her having to reveal the tirth. But it hits her now, looking at those damn empty seats that should've been -in another life would’ve been- filled by her other family, that the words she’d been too scared to say out loud -for fear of them being enshrined into reality- had already probably been spoken into existence by someone else. And it hits Paige now, that maybe she’s desperately holding onto a rope that has already been let go of.
“You good Bueckers?” she whirls around to find Arike looking at her, eyebrows raised in concern.
“I’m fine,” Paige lies; she’s gotten so incredibly good at that, “just thinking a lot of thoughts.”
Arike nods in understanding, “fair enough. But you got this dude,” she reaches out a hand to squeeze her rookie’s shoulder, “whatever you’re thinking, when you get on that court, none of it’s gonna matter. All that matters for 40 minutes is the game and that we come out of it with a win. You gonna help us win Paige?”
“That’s the fucking plan,” Paige smirks, earning her a matching one from Arike before the shooting guard saunters onto the court, ready for tip-off.
All that matters is the game.
Paige sucks in a deep breath, letting herself look over at the courtside seats one more time. This is her reality now. There’s no point in waiting for a regretful phone call or a surprise midnight knock on her door because it’s not going to happen. She feels a sense of hollowed acceptance as she finally turns away from the seats, plastering on a confident smile as she takes her place in the Dallas Wings starting five. And Paige is faced with the same truth that she’d learned at a far too young age; that people would leave her but the game never would.
***
Dallas wins the game by 17 points. Paige’s statline is 21 points, 6 rebounds and 8 assists with 2 steals and a block. It’s a respectable statement from the rookie and her teammates are overjoyed. She’s surrounded by them as they celebrate winning their first game of the season and there’s a sense of hopeful excitement about how the rest of the season could go. Her eyes go over the top of them to find the cute Dallas local reporter that Paige had befriended shooting her a congratulatory wink and she blushes a little bit, looking away bashfully. In the distance, Paige can make out a small crowd of people decked in custom Wings #5 jersey, whistling in excitement. Despite the home fans, their celebration still echoes around the stadium and the loudest cheer comes from her brother who stands next to her father, both of them beaming with pride. And It’s almost enough to prevent her eyes from wandering back to the empty courtside seats. Almost.
***
It had seemed like a good idea at the time. With the quick transition from the college season into the draft, Paige hadn’t had found time to go home inbetween. And so when the Wings had been making hotel arrangements for DC, she’d opted to stay with her dad and Drew in Maryland instead. But as she stands in the doorway to her bedroom, staring at a wall filled with pictures that are an ode to the past - collages that are practically a shrine to her broken relationship- Paige finds herself longing for the cold, unfeeling exterior of a foreign hotel room.
Paige’s life can be split into two parts. There’s the Before Azzi and then there’s the With Azzi. And the truth is that there isn’t much from the Before Azzi left in Paige’s life. Every inch of her current life has been touched by the brunette, illuminated by her presence and now, it’s tainted by her absence. Especially in Maryland. Since she’d met the Virginia native, the DMV area had always been synonymous with the Fudds for Paige and she can’t remember a time when she’d been here -when she’d been in this bedroom- and not had plans to see them- to see Azzi.
She takes a hesitant step inside, eyes gliding over each photograph and it’s like she’s being transported through time. The memories are as vivid as ever, bursting with color as they ellipse her mind. Paige can picture every moment like she’d lived it yesterday. She can still hear their laughter echoing through the air, can feel the softness of their hands -their bodies- brushing against each other, can still taste the lingering sweetness of their lips meeting halfway as they breathed silent promises against each other’s skin.
A silent sob wracks through Paige’s body as she brushes her fingers over the most recent image of them from December -the last photograph she’d had time to print out. It’s one that Drew had taken of them in the kitchen- Paige propped up on the counter and Azzi in between her legs, one hand on the counter with the other resting right against Paige’s heart. Neither of them had even noticed the little boy, too wrapped up in each other; they were in their own world like they often had been. Azzi’s head is thrown back in laughter -probably at some ridiculous joke her girlfriend had cracked- and Paige has that goofy - just for Azzi- grin on her face as she gazes at the brunette with nothing but adoration.
The picture is from barely six months ago but they look so young to Paige, so innocent, so naive, so fucking happy, so completely unaware that in a couple of months, one hesitantly spoken word would dissolve that happiness into a puddle of rubble.
No.
She thinks that one simple word is destined to echo through her ears, like that unpleasant screech of nails scratching against a chalkboard, for as long as she still has the ability to hear. Paige hadn’t even really heard it at first; it had been said so softly, so quietly, so brokenly and she’d barely seen Azzi’s lips move. For the briefest moment she’d tricked her mind into believing it was just the sound of the wind around them. But then there it was again.
Louder.
Stronger.
No.
Paige’s hands instinctively clasp around her ears, fingers tangling tightly through her blond hair, because she can still fucking hear it. Here in this bedroom, where every corner still holds a little part of Azzi -holds a little part of them- the sting of rejection is louder than it’s been since it had first hit. Because it’s not just the pictures. It’s all the little pieces of them they’d left scattered over Christmas break, thinking they’d come back to it together.
It’s a set of Azzi’s earrings -one Paige vaguely remembers picking out for her when they’d gone shopping a couple of weeks before- placed delicately on Paige’s dresser. It’s the pink sweater -that neither of them are sure who it originally belongs to but like most of their clothes, is basically a shared item at this point- haphazardly thrown over a chair. It’s that stupid book they’d started reading together -Paige lying across her girlfriend’s lap, toying with her curls as Azzi read the story out loud- still lying on the nightstand, waiting to be finished.
Despite being alone in her room, Paige finds herself rapidly shaking her head. Because she can’t do this. Can’t spend a night in this room that had barely ever been just hers, had always felt more like theirs. She can’t sleep on that bed, no when her last memory of it is being tangled in the sheets with Azzi on a cold wintry morning, their legs intertwined with each other as they’d giggled to themselves in between languid lazy kisses. And maybe it’s pathetic of her but she can’t find it in herself to unmake the bed, not when her last memory of the two of them in this room is her leaning against the wall, shamelessly checking out her girlfriend as Azzi neatly made the bed, chiding Paige for the nth time on the importance of tidiness.
“When are you gonna learn how to make your bed,” Azzi had sighed.
Grinning, Paige had wrapped her arms around her girlfriend from behind, slotting her face into the crevice of Azzi’s neck and brushing her lips against the patch of skin, “I know how to make my bed. I just never have to because I’ll always have you to do it for me.”
Except for the last few weeks, Paige has had to make her own bed and she fucking hates it.
Breathing sharply, Paige slowly backs out of her bedroom, gently pulling the door shut. She leans her forehead against the cool mahogany frame, trying to calm herself down. There’s been a nonstop dull ache in her chest since that night but tonight feels different, like the cold hands of the past have managed to dig under her ribcage and squeeze her heart -something sharp digging into her arteries- so hard that it hurts just to exist. Paige gives herself a couple more seconds, creating half-moons as she digs her nails into her palms, before she finally pulls away from the door, heading towards her brother’s room down the hall.
“You know you really should start knocking before you come into my room,” Drew says with a mock annoyance that’s betrayed by his large grin, as Paige slips into his room, “I’m almost a teenager.”
Despite the heaviness that’s still lingering between her lungs, Paige suddenly finds it a lot easier to breathe. Her little brother’s bedroom is dark, save for red LED lights and dim glow of the TV. Drew is reclined on his bed, gripping a white gaming controller between his hands.
“You’re always gonna be a baby to me Drewski,” she teases, stepping towards him to ruffle his hair, laughing when he ducks her hand and shoots her an irritated glare in response.
“Not the hair,” he whines and then groans as his eyes flicker back to the screen, towards the game he'd been playing, “damnit Paigey you just got me killed.”
“Hey hey hey, don’t blame me for your incompetence,” Paige chides.
Drew rolls his eyes, before reaching over to hand over the other controller, “you wanna play?”
Paige shakes her head, gently pushing his hand away, “nah I just-” she chews at her bottom lip, shuffling her feet with uncharacteristic nervousness, “I was just uh- just wondering if I could stay in here tonight? We could have a sleepover? Like old times? Just you and me.”
It’s heartwarming the way her little bother’s eyes light up -like he’s still the little boy that used to fit perfectly in Paige’s arms, not almost a teenager who’ll eventually be taller than her- as he nods excitedly, scooching over to give his older sister space on his bed. Paige crawls gingerly onto the bed, hesitating for a second, before she lays her head on her brother’s lap, curling into herself. Drew is warm and inviting and familiar and for a second she almost forgets that serrated pain shooting through her nerves. But then it all comes rushing back and Paige has to swallow harshly to keep herself from giving into the fresh new set of tears that are re-emerging on her waterline.
“Paigey,” Drew whispers softly as he runs his finger through her delicate blonde hair, clearly sensing something’s wrong, “are you okay?”
“I’m fine Drew,” she means to keep her voice strong but it comes out as broken as she feels.
“Paigey,” the little boy’s voice is more worried now, “should I call Azzi?”
This time the whimper escapes before Paige can stop it as she tightly closes her eyes. She knows her brother means well; knows that Drew doesn’t really remember Paige without Azzi- doesn’t remember a time before his sister knew how to heal without the brunette’s touch. He’d watched Paige celebrate all her victories with Azzi and he’d seen the same girl hold his sister in all her tragedies, putting her back together every time she broke with promises of you’ll have always have me. From the moment Drew was old enough to understand his sister’s feelings, he was also perceptive enough to understand that Azzi was always what she needed, no matter how she was feeling. And it’s still true, Paige thinks; she wants nothing more than to say yes, wants nothing more than for Drew to call Azzi, so Paige can tell her how much she fucking misses her- how much she fucking needs her.
Perhaps it's pride or maybe it’s fear, but Paige doesn’t say what she wants. Instead she vigorously shakes her head in her brother’s lap, “n-no it’s fine. I’m fine. It’s late and Azzi’s busy-”
“Azzi’s never too busy for you,” Drew says indignantly, “I’m gonna call her.”
“Drew stop,” Paige’s voice is much firmer this time as she wraps a strong arm around her little brother’s knee, stopping him from moving, “we’re not calling Azzi.”
She could tell him now. After all, she’s going to have to when he inevitably asks why he hasn’t seen Azzi -why he hasn’t seen the girl who’s been a part of his life for more than half of it- in so long. But even though the words sit scratchily on the tip of her tongue, she still isn’t quite ready to spit them out; isn’t quite ready to confront reality.
“Why not,” petulance coats Drew’s tone.
“Because I’m fine and I don’t need- I don’t want to talk to her,” Paige lies.
The little boy scoffs, “you always want to talk to her.”
He doesn’t know the way that simple sentence turns the cracked pieces of Paige’s heart into dust as she tightens her grips on his leg, “Drew please- please just let it go.”
“Why,” Drew argues stubbornly, “why can’t we call her.”
“We just-” Paige’s voice breaks, as she scrambles to wipe her tears before they can wet her little brother’s shirt, “we just can’t okay?”
And there must be something in her voice -the anguish that no amount of trying is able to hide- that Drew pieces together to understand that this isn’t a battle he can win, no matter how much he and Paige might both want him to. The young boy slowly droops his body back to its reclining position, his fingers returning back to Paige’s hair as he begins to stroke her head again.
“It’s gonna be okay Paigey,” he whispers with all the hopeful innocence of a blissfully naive little boy, “everything gonna be okay.”
And god does Paige want to believe him. But the courtside seats were empty tonight. And she’s in the DMV with no plans to see the Fudds- to see Azzi. And she’ll never know the ending to that stupid book on her bedside table.
She wants to believe Drew but Paige isn’t sure how anything’s ever going to be okay again.
***
May 2033
It should be a joyful moment -the three most important people in her life congregating together- but instead as Paige quietly observes the scene in her living room -Drew silently seething, Azzi fidgeting nervously with her thumbs and Stephie babbling away amidst it all- she feels suffocated by this heavy gray cloud of apprehension lingering above her head. If she’s honest with herself, she’s been on edge for a couple of days now, since training camp had begun to be precise. Since she’d moved to the Bay Area, everything else in Paige’s world had been eclipsed by Azzi and Stephie. The mother-daughter duo were all-consuming and if she’s honest with herself, Paige had been more than happy to let her thoughts -and her heart- be consumed by nothing but the two of them.
It had been so easy to forget everything else and the tentative verbal three-way deal she technically had with the Valkyries and the Liberty had pretty much ceased to exist in her thoughts. That is until Angie Davis -the lynchpin in this agreement- had been selected, just as everyone had predicted, to the Valkyries. The Stanford PG had shown up to training camp with a shy smile and an eagerness to learn that all the rest of the vets on the team had warmly embraced. But all Paige saw in the girl was the ticking time bomb of a decision she’d forgotten she’d have to make. And it isn’t just the reminder of the decision that has Paige feeling at unease; it’s why she has to make this decision in the first place, the reason behind why she’d agreed to this deal in the first play, why she’d been so adamant for Talia to make sure she didn’t get stuck here.
Eight years ago, Azzi Fudd had broken her heart and Paige has spent every moment since, trying to collect the shattered pieces and reassemble them.
And the last thing Paige had wanted to do was give Azzi the hammer to smash her barely fixed heart again.
That’s what it had felt like when Talia had first brought up the Valkyries offer. It wasn’t that she and Azzi hadn’t been in each other’s orbit the last couple of years -it was impossible not to- but since the breakup, they’d never been around each other long enough, never quite been in the right situations, for that opportunity to present itself again. But Paige had known that if she came to the Valkyries, it would be an inevitability. That belief had only been strengthened the day she’d visited the Bay Area. She’d been adamant from the second she’d gotten on the flight that she couldn’t be persuaded to join Golden State, no matter how much she respected the organization and how well she’d fit into their system; no matter how much she adored the city and its love for her favorite sport.
But then she’d met a little girl who had an identical smile to the one that had held her captive since she was fifteen and barely knew what love was. And if Stephie with her doe-eyed wisdom that Paige would look great in purple wasn’t enough, then there was Azzi. Paige had expected Azzi to tell her to decline the offer. In a way that’s what she wanted; the masochistic need to feel the sting of that rejection again so she wouldn’t be tempted to burn herself in the fire again. But the brunette had done the opposite and Paige had known by just how quick her resolve had succumbed, that she’d been right to fear the inevitability. And it was that fear that had prompted the verbal agreement with the Liberty; an escape plan she’d forgotten she’d devised.
Because escaping had been the last thing on Paige’s mind the last few weeks.
All of Paige’s fears and apprehension had seemed to take a backseat the moment Azzi had smiled -hesitant but real- and said she was ready to try, the moment Stephie’s tiny hands had fit perfectly into her own.
But she can feel it all coming back now, bubbling to the surface and threatening to spill over like lava, wiping out this paradise she’s been in with Stephie and Azzi. It had started with the reminder of the Liberty deal but it’s Drew’s presence -his scowl directed at Azzi that feels like one of a brother still betrayed on his sister’s behalf- that had heightened it. Her little brother’s anger, and the genuine hurt that lingers behind it, feels like a dark reminder of Paige’s own heartbreak.
Suddenly she feels like she’s 23, playing her first WNBA game and instead of celebrating a solid debut, she’s sobbing in her little brother’s lap over the girl who had walked away.
“Miss Buecks,” Paige looks down to find Stephie crawling into her lap, “are we ready to order the pizza now?”
The little girl’s arms wrapping around her neck eases some of Paige’s discomfort as she smiles down at Stephie.
“I’ve been ready for ages. You were the one yapping away,” she teases.
Stephie pouts, “I don’t yap,” she turns her body towards Azzi, “Mama I don’t yap do I?”
Azzi’s own tense body seems to relax a little as she smirks at the two of them, “you definitely yap Stephie-”
“Mama,” Stephie protests, looking betrayed.
“But not nearly as much as your Miss Buecks yaps,” Azzi’s eyes twinkle with mirth as Paige splutters, jaw dropping open with mock offense, “between the two of you, it’s a miracle my poor ears haven’t fallen off.”
“Just for that I’m not adding veggies to the pizza,” Paige sticks her tongue out, causing Stephie to giggle and Azzi to roll her eyes at the display of immaturity.
Paige slips out her phone, pulling up their usual pizza place on doordash and quickly plugs in her memorized orders for everyone in the room as Stephie gets herself comfortable on the blonde’s lap. The five-year old leans her head back against Paige’s chest, who instinctively wraps her free hand around Stephie’s waist, keeping her securely in place.
“So uncle Drew,” Stephie says with a grin, slightly leaning forward as she addresses the man sitting rigidly on the edge of the sofa, “did Miss Buecks yap a lot when she was younger too.”
“Be careful how you answer that,” Paige warns with a good natured glare in her brother’s direction, trying to lighten his mood.
It works to an extent as a small smirk slips onto the edges of Drew’s lip, “oh she was a chronic yapper.”
“What does che-ronic mean?” Stephie asks, scrunching her nose in confusion.
Drew laughs, eyes glittering with mischief, “it means she didn’t know when to shut up.”
“Drew Thomas,” Paige guffaws, “you’re supposed to be my little brother, protecting your older sister’s honor and all of that.”
“Hey,” Drew raises his hand in surrender, “my older sister taught me to never lie, especially not to children.”
“Did you really talk that much?” Stephie asks, turning to Paige with wide eyes.
“Don’t listen to him Stephie-bean,” the blonde says, brushing her hands through Stephie’s curls, “it’s all bullsh-”
“Paige,” Azzi hisses immediately as the older woman bites her lip to stop the curse word from escaping.
“Bullsharks,” Paige amends, “fake news. False advertising. I was a calm and quiet kid for sure.”
Drew snorts, leaning back into the sofa and Paige lets out a soft sigh of relief at seeing her brother relax. Her eyes flicker over to Azzi, feeling a sense of calmness when she sees the younger girl’s nervous fidgeting has stilled and there’s a tentative smile on her face.
“You weren’t calm or quiet,” he says pointedly.
“Was too,” Paige argues stubbornly.
“Yes you were,” Drew presses, “Stephie if you don’t believe me, ask your Mama,” he turns to Azzi, “tell her Azzi. She literally yapped your ear off into becoming your friend.”
Azzi blanches, clearly shocked at having been so cavalierly addressed, and even Paige is a little surprised by the expectant “agree with me look” that Drew is giving the brunette after having spent the last moments practically glaring at her. But really it probably shouldn’t be that surprising. Because Drew and Paige are cut from the same material and letting Azzi into the folds seems to just come naturally to both of them. And it’s so familiar to when they’d all been years and years younger -two college students and a little boy - so familiar to the countless nights spent in Minnesota and DC and Connecticut where several silly arguments like this between Paige and Drew had ultimately ended with them both turning to Azzi -the forever moderator- in hopes that she’d side with them.
She’d always sided with Drew -much to Paige’s chagrin, though she’d been secretly enamored by the relationship between her girlfriend and her brother- and this time is no different as Azzi shakes off the shock, replacing it with a cheeky expression.
“Didn’t shut up for 14 whole hours,” she laments, her voice filled with teasing but she smiles at the blonde as if she’s reminiscing it, reminiscing the moment that began it all for them and Paige can’t help the hopelessly sappy smile she gives her in return.
“14 hours? You talked for 14 whole hours, Miss Buecks?” Stephie’s eyes are comically large as she echoes the number.
“Of course not,” Paige defends, eyebrows creasing as she glares at the other two adults in the room, “this is bullying. Stephie,” she whines, nuzzling her head into the little girl’s neck, “they’re ganging up on me.”
“There there Miss Buecks,” Stephie says diligently as she pats at the older woman’s cheek.
“We’re just telling the truth,” Drew shrugs.
“Exactly,” Azzi nods solemnly, “the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.”
She grins, reaching her hand out for a high five and Paige watches as Drew raises his own hand, ready to reciprocate. For a second it feels like everything is coming together; like the past could just stay in the past. But then he stops midair. The easy smile fades from his face and the previous tautness comes rushing back. He pulls his hand back, turning away from Azzi, who’s face slowly falls back. The lightheartedness from mere seconds ago is replaced by the tension from before and that burden of all that’s happened between us returns as a heavy weight pressed against Paige’s heart.
“Paigey used to yap a lot,” Drew says slowly, “like I said you couldn’t get her to shut up and then one day,” he pauses, angry eyes darting towards Azzi, “one day she just got quiet- she shut up- she stopped yapping all the time.”
“Why?” Stephie asks softly, her tone a mixture of concern and genuine curiosity.
Paige’s arm tightens around the little girl in her lap as she shoots her brother a pleading look, “Drew-”
“Because someone-” there’s so much venom in the word that it makes Azzi visibly flinch and Paige wants to soothe away the creases forming in her forehead, “someone broke her heart. And it took years- it took years to get her back to normal, to get her yapping again. To get my sister back to who she was.”
There’s pindrop silence as Drew seethes at his own words and Azzi rapidly blinks back tears, until Stephie turns around in Paige’s lap, tiny hands cupping the blonde’s face as she tries not to let her emotions show in front of the little girl.
“Someone broke your heart?” Stephie looks so upset by the idea that Paige wants to vehemently deny it, “how could anyone break your heart Miss Buecks?”
She means well -just a child concerned for one of her favorite people- but she has no idea of the dagger she’s just twisted in her own mother’s heart as a faint whimper escapes Azzi’s lips. Paige opens and closes her mouth, hopelessly looking at the brunette who’s digging her fist into the sofa, despair embedded all over her face.
“Stephie-” Paige tries to say.
“Don’t worry kid,” Drew cuts in instead, his voice steady and firm, “it happened once but I won’t-” his eyes burn with fire as he looks at Azzi, “I won’t let it happen again.”
“Stephie,” Paige says quietly after a moment, her gaze transfixed on Azzi whose doing her absolute best not to let her emotions show in front of her little girl, “sweetheart how ‘bout you show Uncle Drew around the house.”
“I don’t want to see the house,” Drew says petulantly as he stubbornly crosses his arms over his chest
“Yes. You. Do.” Paige grits out, trying not to curse when her younger brother rolls his eyes at her.
“C’mon Uncle Drew,” Stephie says cheerfully as she slips off of Paige’s lap and reaches a hand out for the man instead, “Miss Buecks has a really cool house and maybe we can go steal some of her cool clothes.”
Drew sighs but he’s not immune to Stephie’s infectious energy. A hint of a grin sneaks through the cracks as he accepts the little girl’s offer. Stephie starts to pull him towards the staircase but the perceptive girl stops for a second in front of her mother, a cautious look on her face as Azzi musters up a grin to mollify the little girl's concern and Drew adamantly averts looking at the other woman.
“Go on bean,” Azzi urges softly, keeping her shaky voice under control, “go show him the house.”
Stephie nods before gently pressing her lips against Azzi’s cheeks, eliciting a deep breath from her mother, before she practically drags Drew towards the staircase, already speaking a mile per minute.
There’s a pause, filled with a combination of the quiet rumble of Stephie blabbering upstairs and Azzi’s uneven breathing. Then the tears that the brunette had been trying so hard to barricade behind her eyelids starts cascading down her cheeks and Paige almost trips on her own feet as she moves towards her. She falls to her knees in front of Azzi, gently brushing her against her cheek, before wrapping her hands around her tightly formed fists.
“Baby don’t cry. Please I hate it when you cry,” Paige whispers softly, pressing her forehead against Azzi’s, “he’s just-”
“He’s right,” Azzi cuts her off, shaking her head.
“Az-”
“He hates me-”
“He doesn’t-”
“He does,” Azzi presses, her tears falling faster now, “and he should. Paige I did break your heart,” they both flinch at the blunt statement, “and he doesn’t trust me because of it and he hasn’t forgiven me for it. I haven’t forgiven me for it.”
“Baby,” Paige echoes again, unsure what else to say.
“Have you forgiven me?”
The question lingers in the air as Azzi looks expectantly at her and Paige stumbles over her words, trying to find the right ones. She doesn’t really know how to answer the questions; hadn’t been expecting to be confronted with it tonight. Paige wants to say yes; she wants to take away Azzi’s guilt so fucking bad. These last few weeks had been so perfect, Paige had convinced herself she was over what had happened almost a decade ago. But if she’s honest with herself -if she’s honest to the memories of every night she’d spent sobbing into her pillows, missing the girl in front of her and resenting her for walking away- Paige doesn’t really know if she has forgiven Azzi.
“Paige?” Azzi ask again, her voice breaking on the one syllable.
Paige’s face crumbles as she looks at the girl defenselessly, “ Az, I-”
The doorbell rings at the exact moment and Stephie comes excitedly barrelling down the staircase as the two women scramble away from each other, trying to compose themselves.
“Miss Buecks, Mama,” the younger girl hollers, “pizza’s here.”
Paige looks at Azzi who’s rushing to wipe away the remnants of her tears. She opens her mouth, desperately willing herself to find something, anything that could offer the girl in front of her some comfort; that could take their relationship away from the precipice of this cliff they’ve somehow found themselves on. But the right words don’t materialize and instead Paige closes her mouth and turns away, slowly heading towards Stephie as Azzi’s question continues to wreak havoc in her mind.
And she wishes she could rewind the clock and freeze them where they had been just a couple of hours ago, freeze them in a moment where the past hadn’t weighed so heavily on the present. But perhaps the past had always been there and they’d simply just done a marvelous job ignoring it. Except tonight, they can’t seem to ignore it anymore.
***
Paige thinks pizza has never tasted so terrible in her life. The mood at her basically unused dining table is numbingly sober; even Stephie has stopped her chatter, the little girl clearly picking up on the tense atmosphere around her as she quietly nibbles away at her slice of pizza. It’s in stark contrast to the innumerable dinners they’d had in the last three weeks; the three of them -Paige, Azzi and Stephie in between them- at the table or the counter or sometimes even the couch, raucous with laughter and smiles. Paige doesn’t understand how moments can shift like this; how last night could have been filled with giggles and grins and tonight is filled with nothing but a silence filled with too many unspoken words.
Her eyes flicker over to Azzi, who’s making a concerted effort to keep her own everted from both Bueckers siblings. The brunette’s question from before feels like a loud horn blaring in Paige’s ears, one that she can’t seem to find the off-switch for no matter how hard she searches for it. They’re barely a couple feet apart, sitting opposite each other with Drew next to Paige and Stephie next to Azzi, but the width of the table feels like it stretches for miles. Paige misses the warmth of Azzi’s body pressed against hers, misses the sly brush of their hands before their fingers would inevitably curl around each other’s underneath the table where Stephie couldn’t see.
“Miss Buecks,” Paige swallows, trying to shake off the feeling of is this us crumbling again, as she diverts attention to Stephie who’s smiling at her with that cheeky grin that means she wants something.
“What’s up Stephie-bean?” Paige asks and she’s convinced there’s magic in the little girl’s existence because despite the tightness she still feels in her chest, having Stephie close feels like a reason for her to breathe through it.
“Can I have a soda?” Stephie asks, using the palm of her hands to frame her slightly tilted face as she juts out her bottom lip in a pleading.
Paige grins, ready to concede as she often is with the little girl but Azzi speaks first, “no soda Stephie.”
Stephie pouts, “why not?”
“Because I said so,” Azzi says bluntly and Paige is taken back by the sharpness of it.
“Mama please,” Stephie begs, “please, please, please.”
“No Stephie,” there’s a warning edge to Azzi’s tone but Stephie doesn’t pay much heed to it continuing to plead and the irritation on her mother’s face -clearly exacerbated by other things- gets more and more apparent.
“Please Mama. Pizza just doesn’t go down right without soda,” the little girl argues, “can I please just have a little bit. Just a teeny tiny bit Please, please pretty please please-”
“Stephie, no” Azzi repeats, pinching the bridge of her nose as Drew and Paige exchange nervous glances.
“Stephie, yes,” the little girl argues, stubbornly crossing her hands over her chest.
“Ste-”
“I want soda. I want soda. Please, please, please, plea-”
“I said no Stephanie,” Azzi all but yells, startling Stephie into being quiet and making both Drew and Paige flinch. The little girl is wide-eyed for a second -not used to anything but her mother’s normally gentle way of dealing with her occasional brattiness- before her lips begin to tremble and big fat tears begin to spill down her cheeks. She scrambles out of her chair, beelining towards Paige and climbing onto her lap as she burrows her face into the blonde’s neck, wetting her shirt with tears.
“Shhh, shhh sweetheart it’s okay,” Paige whispers to the little girl, gently rocking the two of them back and forth as she strokes her hair.
She glances at Azzi, who’s adamantly looking, her face stone cold but regret gleaming in her eyes, “Az-”
“No,” the younger woman says immediately.
“C’mon,” Paige says exasperatedly, “you don’t even know what I was gonna say.”
“If it’s about giving her a soda, I don’t wanna hear it,” Azzi warns, “you can’t just give into all of her demands all the time, you have to learn to say no and she needs to learn to hear it.”
“I hear you but Az it’s a Friday-”
“Paige-”
“A tiny bit of soda to start the weekend can’t hurt. In fact,” Paige smirks down at the little girl in her lap as she coaxes Stephie’s face out of her neck so she can wipe away the tears on her blotchy red face, “I think a little soda to start the weekend is probably good for you.”
She feels her heart soar when it makes Stephie giggle, letting out a couple teary hiccoughs in between as she clutches onto Paige.
“I think so too Mama,” the little girl echoes, looking back at her mother with a timid grin.
“Give in Azzi,” Paige matches the pleading smile on Stephie’s face as she turns her focus onto the brunette, “she deserves a little treat
“I know what she deserves. I think I know what’s good for my daughter,” Azzi says steely and Paige feels something cold squeezing through her ribcage, “no soda Stephie. End of discussion.”
My daughter.
The thing is Paige doesn’t even really think she has the right to be upset over Azzi’s statements. Really, it’s nothing but the truth. Stephie is Azzi’s daughter and Azzi definitely knows what’s good for her daughter. So why does it sting like this? Why does it feel like little shards of ice piercing into her heart, leaving deep gashes that have her whole body feeling like it’s freezing over? Paige knows why, knows that these past weeks had been enough to trick her mind into believing the mirage that Stephie was hers. But now Azzi’s flicked her fingers against it causing the whole fantasy to come crashing down and Paige feels herself slowly getting buried under the rubble of it.
“Right," she says softly, trying to keep her voice steady, “she’s your daughter and you know best,” she ignores the tinge of guilt in Azzi’s eyes as she turns to Stephie who looks like she’s ready to protest again, “you heard your Mama Stephie. No soda tonight.”
“But Miss Buecks-” Stephie whines.
“No sweetheart,” Paige says gently, shaking her head.
The little girl narrows her eyes before letting out a frustrated groan as she slips off of Paige’s lap. She loudly stomps her feet, glaring at all the adults in the room before she angrily storms upstairs. It’s so unlike the usually even-keeled little girl that Paige thinks it’s probably a reaction to the tension she can sense between the adults. Her eyes drift over Drew -who’s chewing at his lips in a similar manner to how his big sister often does- before locking with Azzi’s and she feels that familiar guilt of there’s always collateral damage for our mistakes pooling at the pit of her stomach. The brunette breaks eye contact first, letting out a heavy sigh before she follows behind her daughter and Paige lets her face fall into her hands,
It feels like everything’s in free fall, like during an earthquake when everything shakes and the books -the complicatedly tangled stories of the past and present- go flying from their shelves. Paige rubs at her eyelids, trying to make this helpless feeling go away. Her fingers are coiled tightly around a rope, just like they had been on that night eight years ago and just like that night, she can feel the tips of them starting to bleed. She can feel Drew’s gaze fixated on her; can tell he’s contemplating whether to say something or not. Swallowing, Paige pulls her face out of her palms to look at her brother, a decisively defiant expression on her face.
“Something you wanna say?” she asks him, cocking her eyebrows as if she’s daring him to speak.
Drew hesitates for a second before an almost identical expression crosses his face, “what the fuck are you doing Paige?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Paige replies airly.
Drew narrows his eyes at her, “seriously?”
“Seriously,” Paige shrugs.
“This was supposed to be a temporary arrangement Paige,” Drew says, ignoring the way his sister flinches at the reminder as he drops his voice lower so they can’t be overheard, “you were supposed to be with Golden State for one season, hopefully win a championship and then you’d be off to New York at the end. That was the plan but clearly all of that has gone flying out the window. You’re getting attached to this city, this life, to them.”
A barely believable “of course I’m not,” flutters weakly off of Paige’s lip as she blinks rapidly at the accusation.
“Oh for fucks sake,” Drew curses, “Paige your bed looks like it hasn’t been slept in, in days. There’s almost no groceries in your fridge or your pantry. From what I saw of the garden, it’s basically been left for dead. Your closet is half empty and it sure as shit isn’t because they’re all in the laundry because as Stephie puts it, Azzi says that their laundry basket is three times heavier than it used to be with all your clothes.”
“I-I don’t-” Paige stutters, “that- that doesn’t- doesn’t mean-”
“It’s been two months -if even that- two months Paige and I think you're in even deeper now than you were the last time,” Drew spits the last two words out bitterly like their flames on the tip of his tongue and the sparks of it singe Paige’s skin.
“That’s not- I’m not-” she tries to justify but it sounds hollow to her own ears.
“You are,” Drew says exasperatedly, “what are you gonna do when she walks away again? When she lets you go again, what are you gonna do Paige?”
Her little brother isn’t cruel but Paige swears she’s never heard anything more aimed to hurt than these perfectly directed arrows he’s launching straight at her heart. The defense of she’s not going to leave me stays stuck in her throats, battling against the harsh thoughts of she already has that are taunting her.
“She- I- you- this- I don’t- you can’t-” Paige doesn’t even know what she’s trying to say; she feels like a fish spluttering outside of the water, desperate to breathe air that seems to kill her the more she inhales it.
Drew looks away, his face crumpling slightly, a mixture of sadness and guilt gleaming in his eyes, and Paige can tell that he hates himself a little for being the one to cause her this torment, the one to make her face the darkest possibility of her reality.
“I was there Paige,” he says softly, “I was the one who watched you break in ways that I didn’t even think you were breakable,” his voice snaps, “and I was the one who watched how hard you had to work to put yourself back together. I don’t wanna see any of that again.”
“Drew,” Paige whispers.
“And it wasn’t just her,” Drew continues, “you lost her family too.”
Paige gulps at the reminder, “they were still there. They came to games. They were at my wedding.”
Drew shakes his head, “but it wasn’t the same and you know it. You lost her and you lost them and this time,” he bites his lip, like he wishes the next words weren’t sitting on his vocal chords, waiting to spill out, “this time, if you lose her, you’ll lose a lot more.”
“What do you-” Paige heistates, unsure if she even wants to ask, “what do you mean?”
Her little brother pauses, mouth opening and closing like it’s painful to speak, before his eyes drift towards the stairs and Paige feels her heart sinking even before Drew says the words she knows he’s about to say.
“You’ll lose her daughter. You’ll lose Stephie.”
“No,” the whispered syllable is out before Paige can even stop it, “no, no, no, no-”
“Paige-”
“Stop it Drew,” the blonde says louder than she wanted to as she clutches at her heart, trying to keep it whole as the tears overflow over her waterline.
“Stop what Paige? Stop saying things you already know deep down but are choosing to ignore? Is that what you want me to stop doing?” Drew asks harshly.
“Drew-”
“There’s a reason you didn’t want to commit to the Valkyries and you know it. There’s a reason you only wanted to be here for this season.” her younger brother says firmly.
“I know,” Paige whispers, “I know.”
Drew’s eyes soften, “stick to plan Paige. Let the Liberty be the end goal. You’ll be in New York by the end of October.”
Paige bites her lip so hard, she can taste that morbid taste of iron on her lips as she opens her mouth to say something. She’s not sure if it’s to argue with Drew or to agree and she doesn’t get a chance to find out. Instead there’s a sharp intake of breath and then a quiet, timid voice laced with accusation and Paige feels the blood drain out of her body as she slowly turns around to find Stephie and Azzi -their faces ashen with identical expressions of betrayal- staring at her.
“Miss Buecks, you’re moving to New York?”
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100% of the gold medals won by Brazil in the 2024 Paris Olympics were won by WOMEN!
Brazil has closed the 2024 Olympics with a total of 20 medals, including 3 golds, 7 silvers, and 10 bronze medals. Out of all 20 medals, 13 of them involved women (12 all women’s events, 1 mixed event), and all 3 gold medals were won by women!
The first gold medal was won by Beatriz Souza in +78kg judo! She beat the Israeli athlete Raz Hershko for the gold on August 2nd, and this was her olympic debut! She also guaranteed the bronze medal for mixed team judo by winning her fight, switching the score to 4-3 and beating Italy for bronze.
The second gold medal was won by Rebeca Andrade in the gymnastics floor event! She beat none other than Simone Biles (!!!!) for this medal on August 5th. Not only this, but she is now the most decorated Brazilian athlete in the history of the Olympics with a total of 6 medals.
And finally, the last gold medals were won by the beach volleyball duo Duda Lisboa and Ana Patrícia Ramos on August 9th when they defeated the Canadian duo. They didn’t lose a single game during their entire campaign, and were the only team to remain undefeated.
Besides this, Brazilian women also won silver medals in football and surf, and bronze medals in street skateboarding, two different judo events, boxing, and volleyball. This was the first time ever in the Olympics that team Brazil sent more female than male athletes, and they brought home not only more medals, but all our golds!
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