#every section has green bits with the theory and the theory here is basically just like

[bismuth-209]

in the Netherlands/Dutch the majority of name genderings are the same, and there's a lot of overlap in what names are considered normal, and most of the names that look foreign to the average english speaker i think would still be correctly gendered just by vibes

with the exception of Jan apparently being a name that girls can have in anglo countries while here it's the most basic man name, equivalent to John, literally

and Anne being traditionally a man's name, although i was confused to find that out as my childhood best friend was called Anne and she was very much a girl, but an Anne over 70 is probably a man

but those are the only real exceptions i can think of, most of the vibes are the same

anyways, my dad's name is André, and apparently Russian native speakers instictually call him Andrea, because Andre sounds like a woman's name to them, and Andrea is more masculine, which is entirely opposite to how we do it

also a gendered suffix that very occasionally shows up in Dutch is -é being masculine and -ee being feminine, Renee is a woman and René is a man, and a prostitué is a male full service sex worker and a prostituee a female one

identical pronunciations btw. -ee and -é cannot be distinguished by sound

"Why do all gender-bent characters have names ending in -a, that's such a fanfic trope" buddy, the "girl names end in -a" trope is so old that JRR Tolkien invented a Hobbitish dialect of Westron in which "-a" is a masculine name affix, then turned around and "localised" those names to end in "-o" in the published text (e.g., Bilba > Bilbo, Maura > Frodo, etc.) so they wouldn't sound feminine to Anglophone readers.

[waateeystein]

Analyzing Nick Dear's Frankenstein (and why we should move on to better play adaptations)

Alrighty y'all, its the long-awaited Nick Dear Frankenstein analysis post! This post is focusing specifically on Dear's characterization of the Creature, and why it negatively affects the play overall (plus some adaption theory added in for funsies). For additional context, I am an MFA candidate studying theatre, and I did this research and the accompanying slides for a project in my graduate-level theatrical criticism class. Basically this post is the text version of that presentation, with some of the slides included, and the fluff trimmed. There is a fair bit of academic jargon in here, but I tried to make it as accessible as possible!

And with all of that out of the way, the Nick Dear Frankenstein deep dive is under the cut! (And citations at the end.)

CW: Discussions of violence and SA.

Before I get into the script itself (which if you are interested in reading it, a PDF version is easily found on google), I want to introduce a fun adaptation theory which is specific to studying Frankenstein, called "Frankenstein Complex Theory." This theory comes from Dennis R. Cutchins and Dennis R. Perry in the introduction section to "Adapting Frankenstein: The Monster's Eternal Lives in Popular Culture." (A fantastic read that I recommend to anyone if your school or local library has it in circulation.) This introduction introduces the "complex" theory, as well as some really awesome ideas that get used and referenced by all of the authors included in the book.

Basically Cutchins and Perry assert that traditional adaptation theory is simple not enough to properly study Frankenstein and it's innumerable adaptations. One might also assert that Frankenstein itself is an adaptation, Mary Shelley published multiple editions of her story, and one could argue that the original story is an adaptation of other stories like "Paradise Lost." Linda Hutcheon, another academic in the field of adaptation studies who also wrote a fantastic book (cited at the end), talks about this idea of "palimpsestuous Intertextuality." I want to first argue here that the original text of Frankenstein and its adaptations (the "myth" of Frankenstein) are palimpsestuous.

And when I say the "myth" of Frankenstein is "palimpsestuous," its basically just saying that the "myth" (tall green guy with bolts in his neck who is mostly non-verbal, going around killing people mostly without rhyme or reason) is the predominate cultural narrative of Frankenstein's monster, rather than how he actually is in the book. All of the cultural ideas of what Frankenstein's monster is are this giant network which interweaves with itself, references and builds off itself, and constantly creates new things from these connections. The book and it's adaptations are not in hierarchy, one is not implicitly better or more important than another, they all work together to create our cultural narrative of Frankenstein's monster. Thus, palimpsestuous Intertextuality.

But what is this "Complex" theory I mentioned earlier, and what does it have to do with Nick Dear? Well, here is a helpful diagram!

Essentially, every piece of Frankenstein media every created, including Mary Shelley's original novel, are all part of the "Frankenstein Network." The complex, however, is personal, it includes anything from that network that you have personally consumed. Some people have a wider complex than others, but nonetheless, most of us have some kind of Frankenstein Complex (if you're this far in the post I'm assuming you have one lol.) I think Cutchins and Perry really popped off when they created this theory, its a fantastic way of studying/teaching adaptation.

But onto Nick Dear. Why did I just spend so much time covering adaptation theory and teaching you all a bunch of academic jargon? Well firstly, I spent a lot of time on that research for class and I wanted to share. But secondly and more importantly, my thesis for this entire post is that Nick Dear, whose goal with his play was to create an adaptation which humanized the Creature and sticks very close to the novel, created something that was unintentionally more a product of his personal complex and the palimpsestuous "myth" of Frankenstein's monster. He wrote a play that deeply mischaracterizes the Creature, and in turn uses violence and SA for shock value rather than substance.

And maybe this is a bold claim, but I think comparing the plot of the novel (from the creature's point of view) and the plot of Dear's play is a good place to start. And for your visual reference, I created a plot diagram for both so that we can compare the two side-by-side. (Thanks Freytag lol.)

The first thing we can notice about comparing the overall plot structure is that they are indeed, very similar. And this tends to be most people's reactions to seeing this play. That compared to most other Frankenstein media, it is super faithful to the book in terms of setting and characters and hitting important plot points. And I too want to praise Dear for that. I think he was extremely smart about what characters he chose to cut or combine, and the plot points he chose to include. I also personally love that despite the cutting of Walton's character, Victor and the Creature still visit the arctic at the end of the play. Dear made so many great choices with his play, but ends up squandering it his mischaracterization of the Creature.

But how is he mischaracterizing the Creature? Well first, lets look at how Shelley characterizes him in the book, specifically in terms of violence. I argue, that anytime the Creature kills someone in the book, it is a mostly equal/proportionate reaction to the violence done against him. His first murder his killing William, and the subsequent execution of Justine after he frames her for William's murder. All of this comes after Victor's initial rejection of the Creature, and rejection by multiple villages, the DeLacey's and the young drowning girl and her father. Killing William and Justine was his first retribution after all of the rejection and violence against him, which was initiated by Victor creating him and rejecting him in the first place. And this is his only planned revenge at that point, his next move was demanding that Victor create a female creature for him, with the plan to flee and live a peaceful life in South America (whether he actually meant what he said is up to interpretation.) His next murders only come after Victor destroys the unfished female creature. This is when the Creature kills Henry and then Elizabeth. Elizabeth (and arguably Henry) are Victor's partners, and the people he most personally loves. Killing them is direct retribution for Victor destroying the female Creature, who was supposed to be (at least from the Creature's perspective) the Creature's romantic partner. All of the Creature's direct murders are direct mirrors to Victor's transgressions against the Creature. William is killed for the initial rejection and subsequent exiling from society, Henry and Elizabeth are killed for the destruction of his future romantic partner.

Dear takes a different approach in adapting these murders. In his play, the Creature's first murder is not William, but is actually the DeLacey's. After being personally tutored by Father DeLacey for a significant amount of time, the eventual and fated meeting with Felix and Agatha arrives and the creature is rejected by them. Instead of going straight to Geneva, as he does in the novel, he first sets fire to the DeLacey's cabin, killing the entire family inside. To me, this feels like the first instance of spectacle and shock over actual substance. In both Shelley's novel and Dear's play, as the creature learns about humanity and war, he clearly has a distaste for violence and killing. And because of this, I don't understand why the Creature has such an extreme reaction to the DeLacey's, especially in this version where Father DeLacey shows him so much direct kindness, and it is Felix and Agatha specifically who reject him. Why would the Creature decide to kill them all? If Dear wanted to add additional deaths, why not just kill Felix and Agatha and spare Father DeLacey because of his previous kindness? This violence, to me, feels undeserved and does not mirror the violence done against him by this family. From a staging perspective, the visual of the house burning is actually a very impressive collaboration between the set and lighting designers on the giant stage of the National Theatre. But I question why this moment needs to be here, when the rest of the play and it's staging in the premier production already has so much beauty and shock and spectacle. This is also the first moment where I find the Creature unsympathetic, because this action seems overly extreme as a response.

After this moment, the murder of William is different but not too dissimilar in tone to the novel. At it's heart, it is still the Creature's first direct revenge against Victor. After this, our next big departure from the novel is when the female creature is fully brought to life, different to the novel where she is never fully given life. Victor killing her after she has been able to briefly live is a more extreme measure on Victor's part too, which by my own argument, may warrant a more extreme reaction from the Creature. And to be absolutely clear, Victor simply kills/dismantles her, and nothing more. As for the creature's reaction, Henry is a cut character in this adaptation, so we obviously don't see his death. Instead, the Creature kills Elizabeth, but in this version, not only does the creature kill her, he also r*pes her. This is my biggest point of contention with the play. To me, the subtext in Dear's version is that the Creature views both Elizabeth and the Female Creature as some kind of property, and when his property (the female Creature) is taken away by Victor, he takes Victor's property (Elizabeth) away too. Right before her death in the play, the Creature and Elizabeth actually have a really touching conversation, and they seem to genuinely bond. And so when the Creature eventually kills her afterwards, him r*ping her comes completely out of left field. The only explanation to me, is that despite empathizing with her, the Creature ultimately still views her as Victor's property, and needed to take her away from Victor in a way that was more than just taking her life from him. And honestly, it's a really gross interpretation of these characters. And I want to be very clear that I know depiction is not endorsement, and that I also believe there is a time and a place for depicting SA on stage, but this play was not the time nor the place. The creature simply killing Elizabeth is enough to get the point across, the SA seems to have been added for pure shock value, and again, spectacle. One could argue that this action done by the creature is part of his sexual awakening, just as he learns about other aspects of humanity. But again I believe this is not justified by the text of the play, and is written for pure shock value at the expense of another character, specifically a woman. I would call this misogynistic.

And these extreme reactions from the Creature in Dear's play seem to create this hyper-masculinized version of the character and the story. And I think that is a shame considering the original story was written by a woman, and Mary Shelley did a fantastic job of writing a story where the men can exist across a spectrum of masculinity, without needing to be this stereotyped version of hypermasculinity with a desire for sexual vengeance. I mean, Victor creating the Creature is a pretty clear metaphor for motherhood/parenthood, especially considering Shelley's experience with motherhood and the loss of her children and her own mother. And not to say that a cis man isn't capable of writing an authentic adaptation of a woman's story, but here, I think Nick Dear missed the mark, especially in regards to Elizabeth's death and his depiction of Creature/masculinity.

And I don't want to boil this down to, "Nick Dear is a man and therefore his adaption is automatically bad." Because I don't think that's the case, and I think that's an unfair assumption to make. What I do think, is that despite trying to make an adaptation that strove to humanize the Creature better than most other adaptations, Dear instead created an adaptation that fell into the overly-violent monster tropes of the greater Frankenstein Network of adaptations. In essence, Dear may have unintentionally become a product of his own "complex." And unfortunately, that subconscious influence may be partially why we get this interpretation of the Creature, and the unnecessary shock factors added into the story.

So where do we go from here? Chances are, if you see a theatre company putting on a production of Frankenstein, it's probably the Nick Dear version. This was the case for me last October when I accidentally attended a production of this script at a professional theatre company back home in Florida. My hope is that one day we can move on from this script, and find a Frankenstein play adaptation that humanizes the Creature in a way that most audiences (who probably have not read the book) are unfamiliar with, while also not resorting to shock value that dehumanizes the women in the story. My homework for myself beyond this research project, is to read more Frankenstein play adaptations, and specifically ones that are not written by cis men. I think the experiences of women, trans people and disabled people (or obviously any intersection of these communities and identities) could really lend themselves to new and exciting interpretations of the script that bring broader perspectives into context. If you have any suggestions of Frankenstein plays or playwrights who have written Frankenstein plays, I would love to check them out! I also suggest giving the National Theatre world premier pro-shot of Nick Dear's Frankenstein a watch, purely just for the design of the show. Costumes, set, sound and lighting are all really spectacular, and I would love to do an analysis of that aspect of the show one day.

Obviously there was a lot about this show I didn't cover (Cumberbatch, I know), I just wanted to cover the characterization of the Creature at a textual level, because to me that is the most glaring issue with this play. Please let me know your thoughts, and thanks for reading if you got this far!

Citations (I didn't do a great job of referencing these in-text, but all of these sources are great and I highly recommend checking them out!)

Cutchins, Dennis R, and Dennis R Perry. “Introduction- The Frankenstein Complex: When the text is more than a text.” Adapting Frankenstein: The Monster’s Eternal Lives in Popular Culture, Manchester University Press, Manchester, 2018, pp. 1–19.

Dear, Nick, and Mary Wollstonecraft Shelley. Frankenstein: Based on the Novel by Mary Shelley. Faber and Faber, 2011.

Hutcheon, Linda. “Beginning to Theorize Adaptation: What? Who? Why? How? Where? When?” A Theory of Adaptation, Routledge, New York, New York, 2006, pp. 1–32.

Jones, Kelly. “Adaptations of ‘liveness’ in theatrical representations of Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein.” Adapting Frankenstein: The Monster’s Eternal Lives in Popular Culture, Manchester University Press, Manchester, 2018, pp. 316–334.

Pfeiffer, Lee. “Frankenstein: Film by Whale [1931].” Encyclopædia Britannica, Encyclopædia Britannica, inc., 24 Nov. 2023, www.britannica.com/topic/Frankenstein-film-by-Whale.

Shelley, Mary. Frankenstein; or, The Modern Prometheus. 1818.

Shelley, Mary. Frankenstein; or, The Modern Prometheus. 1831.

[sanstropfremir]

Hey, in honor of A.C.E. coming back soon would you mind talking about their outfits and makeup in their Favorite Boy comeback (or really any of their outfits/make up cause their stylists is a god and deserves a kiss on the forehead)? They have some of my favorite styling of any boy group currently. Undercover Byeongkwan in the black and yellow crop top with the pony tail lives in my mind rent free and I’m not complaining. I especially loved the mesh of modern and traditional in Fav Boys.

yes!!!! ok be prepared people this is basically a love letter to a.c.e's stylist, whoever you are please my dms are open i just wanna talk (and maybe also get married, your choice)

(also this is really long because there's a lot of pictures, so sue me)

ok there's three main things i want to touch on here that are all contributing factors in a.c.e aesthetics hitting every time: colour theory, silhouette, and pattern matching. alright let's go!

colour theory

so i won't explain all of colour theory because i’m not as good as i should be with the actual theory, but here’s the basics. colours are divided into groups: primary, secondary, and tertiary. here’s a fun diagram i stole from google:

in centre you have the primary colours (red/blue/yellow), then you have the secondary colours, made from mixing the primary colours (orange/green/violet), and then the tertiary colours are made from mixing the primary and secondary colours (yellow orange/red orange/red violet/blue violet/blue green/yellow green). there are some commonly associated schemes that are known to ‘look good’ to the human eye:

complementary, where you pair two colours directly opposite each other on the wheel (red/green, blue/orange, purple/yellow)

analogous, which is a base colour with accents from the colours directly next to it (red base, orange/violet accent),

triadic - either base colour with accent colours equidistant from it (green/orange/violet), or base colour with split complementary (violet base, yellow green/yellow orange accent)

tetradic - this is essentially a combination of two or more of the previous, usually a double complementary or an analogous triad with a complimentary accent (red/green with red violet/yellow green, orange/blue with yellow orange/blue violet)

now there’s a lot more getting into tone, value, and saturation, but these are the basic hue combinations that we most commonly see. kpop styling sometimes veers wildly from these rules, but they aren’t hard and fast so it usually isn’t a big deal. plus a lot of styling is supposed to be a bit visually overwhelming anyways, so i’m not exactly counting it against anyone. but what makes a.c.e’s styling look so nice, even though it often isn’t that complicated, is that they always stick to a specific palette. like i went all the way back through their instagram and ALL their public appearances are coordinated:

even their dance practice videos, of all things!

this is especially true with their performance costumes:

i'm not saying anything really revolutionary here, most groups get colour matching down correctly, but a.c.e's stylists have really nailed down matching the tone and saturation as well as the hue. here's a couple of examples from concept photos:

complementary - full saturation green base, desaturated red (pink) as accent

analogous - full saturation violet, pink, and magenta with desaturated and black accents

triadic - all desaturated

complementary - full saturation red base, varying degrees of desaturation for accent colours

this is fun, let's do some more! this time from their performance costumes:

analogous (monochrome) - full saturation yellow green, desaturated accents

tetradic (analogous with complementary accent) - full saturation red, desaturated violet/red/blue, desaturated green as accent)

triadic (equidistant) - full saturation red/blue with desaturated yellow, desaturated accents

tetradic (double complementary) - full saturation red/green as main pair, desaturated blue/orange as secondary pair, full saturation yellow as accents

starting to see it? you can do this with pretty much any of their styling; i've watched a lot of their performances and i don't think i've seen a single one that didn't follow a really strict colour palette. (ok there were like two savage stages that were not quite as good, but you can tell the stylist was trying to bring them in line with the current 4th gen styling and it didn't work so it didn't last).

costume colours and lighting

this is an important aside in relation to the mvs. whoever edits their mvs is really good at colouring. a big part of colour theory is tone, which is how 'warm' or 'cool' a colour is. it's super important in lighting; the colour wheel is split in half, with yellow through red-red violet categorized as warm, and yellow green through blue and violet as cool. a really easy way to visualize this in lighting is through the light from different types of lightbulbs: led lights are cool toned (they are often slightly bluish), and old style halogen lights are warm toned (they are amber tinged). tones are a thing that kpop videos seem to have a fleeting relationship with; sometimes they're used effectively and sometimes they are not. a big thing that a lot of kpop mvs do is really quickly switch tones in colouring, without connecting the intentions of the colours. here's some examples: ateez's fireworks mv, and oneus' no diggity mv. the fireworks mv has this really weird desaturated balance between warm and cool tones specifically in the interior shots, where they somehow managed to overblow both at the same time, which ends up making it look like they were trying really hard to make a cool tone yellow. you can actually feel your eyes relax in that first shot that takes them outside, because the balance is much more natural. and the no diggity mv.... i love it but it's so chaotic. everything is on high saturation all the time and there's no real limitation on the palette, established connection between colours or arc in the colour story, so the cuts between colours and shots feel more random than intentional. now lets look at some a.c.e mvs in comparision, first: undercover. for starters there's an immediate establishement of red and white/black, with a mild green accent. then it continues to a stronger green/teal, with brown as an extension of red (same undertone). there's a colour shift at the first chorus, where they are in the analogous full saturation violet/pink outfits that i mentioned previously, but they actually desaturate and de-value the hues with edit in order to have it match the tone of the room. the second colour shift is for the second rap break, with byeongkwan and wow in yellow main on black and white backgrounds, but that same level of yellow saturation only appears at the rap break specifically, it's absent from the rest of the mv. and then there's a third colour shift on the last chorus, where they pump up the blue and magenta in order to emphasize the climax of the song.

second, for something a bit crazier: goblin. it follows almost the same pattern as undercover; starting with a strong establishment of red/white/black, but then it jumps into full saturation green and teal as the other main colours. again there's a colour switch at byeongkwan's second rap break, and after than we start to see that deeper saturation blue and pink/purple more, but the main colours are still red/white/black.

ok that's enough about colour, now let's talk about

silhouette

this is maybe a little bit more vague and difficult to describe, but whatever. silhouette is pretty much exactly the way it sounds, it's the overall shape of the body. clothing and body type play equal roles in how silhouette is perceived, but clothing can do a lot to either disguise or transform the body. now there isn't really that much variation in body type in kpop; it's a microcosm of small differences between a lot of very fit people, which has been normalized as "default" by society at large for the last while. i'm not going to get into body politics here, because we all know that kpop dudes are not the median average male body type, but they are for the sake of what we've been socialized to think of as looking attractive so the rest of this is going to operate from that assumption. and when you have five dudes who are pretty smack in the middle of that slight variation (none of them are the largest nor the thinnest, they're all about the same middling height), you've got pretty much free reign to put them in whatever you want and they'll still look hot. kpop styling has a dubious relationship to actual wearable clothing, but it is all costuming so it's not necessary for it to be wearable everyday clothing. but since view in 2015 there's been a dramatic increase in "normal" clothing as performance costume, and the thing about normal contemporary clothing is that it's actually very difficult to style in a convincing way. because it's the trends that the general public is the most familiar with, it's the easiest for them to pick apart where the flaws are. this is all preface to say that there are often common silhouettes that are popular with specific trends. in 2012-2013 there was that sweater tucked into circle skirt with big scarf trend, in the 2007 was like baggy everything and layered tshirts, etc, and 2018-2019 was big colourful patterned shirts. sound familiar? it should, take me higher came out in summer 2018! now there's a debate here (like with most pop culture and celebrity) whether or not kpop is following trends or setting them, and both points are true, but personally i'm of the opinion that kpop is kind of a median between the two; it's not setting trends because it's often taking directly from the fashion industry and/or other popular culture, but it is popularizing them in a way that said trend may not have otherwise. there's a lot of digressions in this section but i'm hoping this will help you see my point.

using take me higher as a specific example, you can clearly see that a.c.e is sticking to a specific silhouette within the group, which is a boxy/loose upper with a fitted lower. which you can see really clearly in this stage, this stage, this stage, this stage, and honestly pretty much every stage for this comeback. sometimes they'll have a slight variation where one of them is wearing a longer shirt, but otherwise it's pretty consistent. this is actually a really common silhouette for them, because it puts emphasis on their specific style of choreo, which is fast footwork. you can see it to the extreme in their main cactus styling, which goes the whole nine yards, fully making their legs the focus and going so far as to embellish them:

this silhouette also shows up for callin', where they're wearing boxy hip cut bomber jackets, and for the majority of the undercover styling, which is cropper military(ish) jackets. and it's shaping up to be similar for higher, so i'll talk more about it when i get there.

they have a consistant look for the goblin stages too, which is hanbok over a tight fitted underlayer. each of their hanbok are different cuts, which you can see with wow's cropped jacket and skirt combo, but it makes the same shape as the others. and in the goblin mv, most of their looks take a traditional silhouette and pair it with modern fabrics and patterns, and combining modern accessories with modernized traditional ones.

sticking to an internal silhouette is not the common mode for most boy group stylings at the moment. there's usually an adhesion to a specific colour scheme, but i have not noticed the same kind of care taken to silhouette. there's usually an adhesion to a member specific shape, but the general shape of the group is not usually as considered. you can see it in ateez's fireworks styling (yes i'm going to use it again, the styling was very weird and i never really talked about how weird it is). in the intro you've got tight pants, loose pants, short jackets, suit jackets, AND a long jacket. and then it's the same kind of variety in the rest of their outfits. if anyhting i'd say the emphasis was meant to be on shoulders, because of the point choreo; and yunho, hongjoong, san, and wooyoung all have some kind of shoulder padding, but that's only half the group. and the stage outfits are not any better. there's the infamous ketchup packet outfit, this naruto themed styling, this inexplicable bdsm football themed styling, and whatever this snakeskin theme is meant to be. it's all over the place! there's some performer specific shapes (hongjoong with the shoulder pads and hip length jacket, san with crop top, yeosang sleeveless) but if you were to just look at the shape of the outfits regardless of colour and pattern, you'd have no way to tell if they were all in the same group.

ok now lastly, let's quickly talk about

pattern matching and texture

this section won't be as long, but i wanted to cover it because even though it's a small and subtle thing, it does a lot in the visual long run. the general rule with patterns is that you don't combine patterns of the same size. this is kind of hard to explain without a visual reference so here's a few examples:

(not my photos, these are from scott schuman's blog the sartorialist)

small check, even smaller pinstripe

mid-size print on pant, large print on scarf

small shirt stripe, mid-size print on tie, mid-large print on scarf

small print on zip jacket, mid-size on scarf, large plaid on jacket

like all fashion and like everything else i've talked about here, this isn't a hard and fast rule, but it does generally look the most harmonious. a.c.e really nails this in the take me higher stages, which you can see here:

(in addition to using different pattern sizes, they're using different colours as well to make it less visually busy)

(bonus! see if you can name the type of colour stories!)

the goblin stages utilize a combination of texture and pattern matching, where the hanbok are a mix of different fabrics (raw silk, embroidered satin, organza) with different patterns, overtop plain underlayers, or when they aren't in hanbok their outfits are very heavily embellished to add visual interest, but are unpatterned fabrics.

in conclusion: good and cohesive colour stories, emphasis on uniform silhouettes and variety in patterns and textures. they also are very specific with accessories, and use them to emphasize key features.

ok! i think that's all i want to cover for this post, because this is already so long. but i've started on the write up for higher already, so i might get into some of my points here in more detail because i'll be talking about one specific thing instead of like......all of it.

[begrudginglytumbling]

Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four,  Part Five, Part Six

Part Three!

...or I suppose technically it’s part two of Part Two since this one will finish up what the other one started.

Shall we return to Grow Up?

(This’ll be long even though I managed to be a little ruthless and cut some of the images.)

We’ll start with the staffroom and finish with the dorm rooms.

I am only assuming it’s a staffroom. For all I know it could be some kind of common room. But they spend a damned lot of time there. They eat. They hangout. They study. And it’s not just the students, so I’m calling it a staffroom.

Anyway! This breakfast bar thing props up a fair amount of leaning, from general side leans.

To the favoured elbow hook lean.

What I find funny about this particular surface is that Bai Yu’s legs are so long that he actually can’t sit ‘properly’ at it. If he sits straight, then he has to lean forward, since his knees are knocking into it. And when he does sit close (his feet aren’t on the floor, since he’s on a stool, so he can sit properly), he has to spread his legs in some form of obscene manspreading fashion that made me cackle and that I apparently managed to not get a screenshot of (and annoyingly I can’t remember which episode it was in).

Right then, on to the table.

Literally.

On to the table.

Because, clearly, Bai Yu can’t resist sitting on a tabletop.

I made a post about it a while ago, but I’m still not over it so, just as a quick break from the sitting - that outfit is certainly a choice of the wardrobe department.

I mean just look at it, with it’s mustard trousers paired with that top, and a lime green tie. It’s like someone threw the 70s at him or something and went with whatever stuck. I feel like it shouldn’t work. But why does it? Is it a Bai Yu thing?

I mean I know he can pull off some slightly questionable fashion choices - that denim on denim look he has as Zhao Yunlan is something I’d normally say isn’t a good idea, but he looks damn good in it. There is also the jacket with the buttons on the back that I’m still questioning to this day. And the time they apparently rolled him in glitter. And, ok, I happily admit that I don’t tend to understand fashion, and I understand even less of Chinese fashion, but, just, how did this choice come about? Pretty much everyone else in this show seems to wear ‘normal’ sedate clothes. Then there’s this guy. With his bright colours, his polka dots on polka dots, and his cravats. Honestly, mixing his outfit choices with his sitting preferences and relationships, I’m becoming convinced that this is just another example of Bai Yu giving his character Disaster Bi energy. The dude ain’t straight, and the dude ain’t gay. I’d say this dude is a Certified Disaster Bi.

Ok, back to the table and Bai Yu’s leaning back in an almost draw-me-like-one-of-your-French-girls manner.

And, like, there is a chair right there.

But nope.

The unpadded table is apparently more appealing for this man’s relatively flat arse than the padded chair that is right there.

I mean, yeah, he makes an appealing picture that’s visually different from everything else going on, but that does not negate the fact he ignored the empty chair that’s right next to him in favour of draping himself over the table.

And look, he can sit at the table as opposed to on it. There’s quite a few instances where he’s sitting at the table in a chair like a proper person. Granted, in pretty much every instance he’s sitting with his legs crossed, because god forbid he have both feet touching the floor.

But of course this table also sees moments where he’s doing something different to the others. Like here. Everyone is standing, he’s sitting.

I think he’s sulking a bit in this one, but still. Different position, different aura, still not supporting his own meagre weight.

And here with his gay little scout-esque neckerchief/scarf thing, leaning back, not sitting properly.

He does this lean back on the sofa too.

The shot is only a couple of seconds long, then he’s standing up, just like in Part Two, where he’s the only one sitting when the Teacher Doctor guy opens the door, and I touched on this a little in the previous part. But I’m really starting to think it might be a deliberate thing that’s quite clever in drawing the eye.

I should probably preface this with saying I know basically nothing about the processes that go into acting and film making. I am however technically a historian by degree and, therefore, fully capable of pulling theories out of my arse which I will then scrabble around to find sources to back them up.

So! The theory is that movement naturally draws the human eye, and if everyone is the same then a scene can fall flat. Sameness is boring, your eyes can flit over it and not take in any details.

Bai Yu?

Bai Yu is a fidget (seriously go watch his livestream videos, he fidgets, fiddles, and wriggles), this movement can be used to his advantage in drawing the eye. That scene up there? He’s not just leaning back, he’s also shifting about. He’s not in focus, but you can be damned sure that movement made my eyes focus on him before I even knew it was him.

And for combating the sameness? Look at the examples above - he’s lounging on the table, different posture to everyone else - he’s sitting while everyone else is standing -  in the previous part he’s standing while everyone else is sitting. I thought at first my eyes were drawn because it’s Bai Yu and, well, he’s a favourite of mine so why wouldn’t my eyes be drawn. But then I realised they would’ve been, regardless, because he’s different. He breaks up the sameness, he stops it being flat. It reminded me of a scene in Pride and Prejudice, where the Bennett girls turn one way, but Mrs. Bennett turns the other. I remember watching or reading a commentary about it, the move being praised. I don’t remember exactly what was said, just that it was praised for being different and adding something to the scene, and it made me wonder if Bai Yu makes similar decisions?

Ok, onto the seating area proper.

He was actually sitting on an armchair properly before this, with both feet on the floor and everything...he looked so uncomfortable. Then he moved to sit on the arm of the sofa, because of course he did.

Y’know, pillows get hugged a lot in this programme, mainly by Bai Yu, but by others too sometimes.

And why sit normally when there’s a perfectly good coffee table in front of you to rest your foot on and make some viewers wince because why is your ankle bending that way? How is that even comfortable?

Just look at it. Barely resting on the table with his other foot adding weight to it.

You make my joints ache, sir.

Ok so technically I probably could’ve cut this one, since he’s just sitting on the sofa, nothing fancy, legs crossed, arm slung over the back as he pulls faces while she’s playing a game - she’s training to be a doctor but has a fear of blood so to get her use to it his character gets her to play fighting games(?) and someone else puts red dye on her hands - but this ends up leading to...

...this.

And just...what? How...?

That can’t be comfortable, surely.

I don’t even...are your joints even real, sir?

If your own joints are twinging in sympathy pain, this is your chance to go give your arms a shake and your body a wiggle before we head to the last section of the dorm rooms. Make sure everything is where it should be to remind yourself that you’re not the broken marionette doll Bai Yu can apparently become.

Right. All shook out? Good.

First stop the girls’ dorms, last stop the boys’.

There’s not much in the main girls’ room, really, just his usual sitting with his legs crossed because obviously the floor is lava and can’t be trusted with both feet.

I’m not sure how much he can be blamed for this one, as he’s technically been thrown into the chair by the little doctor trainee whose character reminds me a bit of Wen Qing.

As a side note, when you’re watching something that you don’t understand the language of, scenes like this can really throw you, because you’re just sitting there minding your own business, when suddenly they’re alone in the room together and Bai Yu’s character is taking off his tie, before striping off his shirt and tossing it on the sofa, and then you’re sitting there like wait, what? When did...? I thought...? What? But then he just gets tossed into the chair and some kind of conversation happens that makes you relax because, yeah, from your vague understanding of the characters, that makes more sense.

Even though he was tossed down, he didn’t actually need to keep his feet on the chair, but of course that didn’t stop him.

He is actually capable of looking comfortable sitting in this particular chair, he even gets to hug a pillow while doing it.

Now then, the boys’ dorm.

He came in, he saw them, he plopped down on the coffee table.

He could’ve sat on the sofa, he could’ve pulled up a chair, but nope. Coffee table.

Obviously, as previously mentioned, the floor is lava, so at the first opportunity he lifted both feet on the table and happily sat on it like an indulgent cat or something.

The sofa.

This sofa is not big enough for a full Bai Yu stretch out, but he can happily curl up on either end.

You could turn him into Bai Yu themed bookends.

Now, from watching Guardian we are all aware that this man is fully capable of embodying the spirit of a cat.

I, however, raise you the spirit of a Great Dane.

I see no difference between these two images.

Also not even this character’s mother can get him to sit properly. She prods him up and shuffles him over, and the first thing he does is pull up a knee.

Y’know how people starfish in bed? Well Bai Yu can apparently starfish in an armchair. He just plops down and flings his limbs out.

I almost didn’t catch this one, it’s part of some studying montage thing, and I thought he was sitting properly since he’s leaning forward, and I can clearly see his slippers.

Then I had a ‘wait, hold up’ moment, went back, and looked properly.

There are no feet in those slippers.

There are no legs attached to them.

So even when you think he’s sitting properly. He isn’t because he is kneeling. And I almost missed this ridiculousness!

Yes, Bai Yu, sit on a bed post that is clearly not meant to be sat on.

This is a moment where he could’ve leant against the wall, but evidently saw even the smallest flat surface as an invitation to sit.

Is that post migrating to places a bed post shouldn’t be migrating to?

Should’ve thought of that before you went and sat on it.

Not only does illness and subsequent surgery give him an excuse to lay on a gurney, it also gives him an excuse to lay in bed!

Apparently being tucked in by other men is also something not entirely unique to Bai Yu’s Zhao Yunlan. That bloke, the roommate that he went on a not-date-but-looked-like-a-date-with-wine-and-everything, seems like an absolute sweetheart and I’m still pissed at what they did in the last episode. It was uncalled for, script writers, uncalled for!

Although, I suppose, in regards to this project, it is kinda ironic that by the end, of the three men in their 'friendship group' of seven, Bai Yu’s character is the last one standing.

If I was a ‘they were roommates. Oh god they were roommates’ kinda writer these beds would be a bloody godsend. Just look at the watching and pining potential if top bunk guy was mooning over bottom bunk guy, while top bunk was doing work at his desk, and bottom bunk was sleeping.

The potential, people, the potential.

So that’s it. Grow Up is all done, and I can confidently put this in the column of Bai Yu quirks that become character quirks.

If you want to watch it, it’s available on Youtube, but there aren’t any subtitles. It’s on Dramacool too, but, again, no subtitles and the quality is horrid compared to Youtube.

Considering I couldn’t care less about the main storyline, it’s not actually a bad little drama.

Part One, Part Two , Part Three, Part Four, Part Five, Part Six

[starstaiined]

i’m sending you a lot so you don’t have to if you don’t want to answer them all: 3, 7, 9, 13, 15, 17, 19) (i just really like odd numbers okay). also i have this theory that all numbers are either hard or soft, and all words are either squiggly or pointy (not based on letters, based on how they sound.) using this classification, what would you put five, two, fifteen, the word museum, the word dog, and the word unicorn? -✨

3: What's your favorite memory from school?

hmmmm...okay i have a few, but speech days. particularly senior year, where we got to stay late and we joked around. i loved being able to sit down with the speech kids and help them gain more confidence in their voice and watching them learn to trust in themselves and their skills. it made me feel so proud of them and how far they’ve come. like the run through before sectionals, where we stayed late and my mom dropped off pizza & donuts and we just got to joke around and laugh. 

7: Talk about your favorite tv show as a kid

okay, my favorite tv show that i can remember is winx club. (THE ORIGINAL, NOT THE STUPID NETFLIX REMAKE WE DONT TALK ABOUT.) but basically, girl learns she’s actually adopted and she has magical powers. funky blonde fairy takes her to magic school, where she learns the power of friendship and becomes part of a group. said group of six teenage girls becomes the strongest force for good in the universe, thwarting ancient evils that much older and wiser adults apperantly can’t handle. found family, very ride or die. 

9: Talk about your favorite historical period

i don’t really have one, but i love any kind of mythology for ancient cultures.

13: Write a review for the last book you read

i can’t remember the last book i read, oops 

15: Write a letter to someone your no longer in contact with

hey sunshine,

it’s been a long time, huh? i miss you, you know. it’s been five years, and i haven’t forgotten you or us or the memories. you made eighth grade memorable, and in all this time i’ve never met anyone like you. how’s sunny doing? do you still have him? do you still listen to the message i put in his paw, or is he tucked in a moving box forgotten somewhere? do you still have your yearbook, and the message I wrote in it? or the letter I gave you at your graduation party? 

there’s a lot I want to ask, but even more I need to say. i never got the chance to tell you, but i loved you. i loved you so much, and i regret never telling you. i wanted to, so many times. at the dinner dance i was going to, but then he asked you out and you said yes and you were so happy. i didn’t want to ruin that. so i bit my tongue. and then the trip to the amusement park? where we spent the day running and hiding from your toxic friends and your stupid boyfriend and my worries and my fears? i’ve never felt to free. when we got on the rollercoaster, and you had a death grip on my arm and the sun was framing the blonde in your hair and turned your green eyes gold...i loved you but i swallowed my words because you weren’t mine to love and there was so much on the line. so i’m telling you now, in a message you’ll never see. 

you promised forever, you promised we wouldn’t lose touch, you promised adventures, and then you disappeared when i needed you the most. i sent you a text on your birthday for four years, long after you stopped replying. and i know these things happen, i know it’s no one’s fault, but i miss you. i really do. and i meant what i said. if somehow, someway, you find your way back here...i’d forgive you for everything. 

i hope you’re doing well, sunshine. i hope life is every bit as kind to you as you are to others, i hope you haven’t stopped dreaming, i hope you chase all your dreams and catch each one of them.  and i hope wherever you go, you find joy in the little things. 

17: What’s your favorite city and why?

any big city, i just love the vibes from them. new york, chicago, los angeles...they all have different vibes but there’s just so much life and so much diversity and it’s so much fun to walk through them. (i don’t appreciate the stupid price of living though, it should not be that high.)

19: What’s sole life advice everyone should know?

don’t let other’s opinions dictate your life. be who you want to be, do what you want to do. as long as what you’re doing isn’t hurting anyone, pursue your dreams.  

five: soft

two: soft

fifteen: soft

museum: squiggly

dog: pointy 

unicorn: pointy 

[angelicspaceprince]

Dewey Finn x Youtuber!Reader Headcanons

I’m in love with the whole youtuber au’s atm so here. Have another. I tried. I really really did.

Some notes: Pre SOR the musical, and also Dewey moved out of his apartment and into yours because it was nicer and closer to places he could perform gigs at.

You started up your Youtube channel after a car accident left you unable to continue working at your job

It hit you pretty hard to be completely dependant on one income, but Dewey did his best to make sure the two of you had food on the table and a roof over your heads

Sometimes you had no power, but you made do

You ended up needing to move apartments, having found somewhere cheaper that gave Dewey a little more wiggle room when it came to finances

When you were packing (Dewey insisted you only did light work, even though your back injury had healed as much as possible and you were able to do almost as much as you could before as long as you rested) when you found your old camera

Dewey didn’t know that you knew the stress he was under because of your lack of ability to work. He never blamed you, after all it wasn’t your fault this happened, but you could see that the stress was getting to him

He also didn’t know about your depression, the feeling of being a burden to him and being unable to help even prepare dinner left you feeling useless

Dewey also didn’t know that after you moved apartment, you started a vlog to yourself, documenting all your feelings onto the camera every day when he was at work

It was a good way to let out all your feelings without burdening someone else with them

Which is secretly what you needed

Eventually, your rants and rambles became more structured, you spoke to the camera as if it was an audience and spoke about how having chronic pain controlled every aspect of your life

The fear that came along with it - would you have a flare up in a place where you couldn’t get help? What if you went to the hospital and they didn’t believe you? What if Dewey realised that you were more trouble than you were worth? What if he realised that you were never getting better and you were stuck like this? What if, what if, what if?

You spoke about how you struggle to even sit upright for long periods of time, making it impossible for you to even do desk work

You spoke about the times that you felt like committing suicide because the pain was to much

But most of all, you spoke about your love for Dewey and how well he was doing to help support you in any way he can.

Each entry was deleted after you recorded it, you didn’t have much space on your ancient camera

But eventually, you decided that, to pass time, you wanted to run a Youtube channel, if anything just to pass the time

You told Dewey one afternoon after work when the two of you were laying on the bed, him exhausted after a shift at work

His whole face lit up

“That’s an awesome idea babes! What sort of videos were you thinking?”

Even in his exhaustion, the guy can’t help but vibrate with excitement, hands moving about as you discuss details

You spoke about possibly doing song covers, but you didn’t feel secure enough to do that on the reg and you preferred to talk, not sing.

You decided to start off, you’d do one video a week talking about weird conspiracy theories that you had heard

As time went on, you started making up your own outlandish conspiracy theories, clearly making fun of the main ones that you had already covered

You had a lot of time on your hands to come up with some truly bizarre ones

It wasn’t until a crack vid about how all video games are designed to convince children that the President of the United States is actually a lizard man (Dewey helped with that one) did your channel take off

Someone did a reaction video of different conspiracy theory youtubers and you were on that list

And your channel took off fast

Soon, you started dipping your toes into other genres, started playing video games and talking smack as you did so

You made sure to pick the video games you were horrendous at for comedic value

You spoke openly and plainly about your problems with chronic pain, and how it affected your mental health

As time went on, more people with mental health started to follow and leave comments about how your videos helped them get through the day

That just having someone else saying that they have the same problems as them was enough to make them feel less alone

You decided to take this a bit more seriously after that

It wasn’t about just having fun and wasting your time anymore, you wanted to make this a career

You set up a schedule, videos went up three days a week on a two week rotation

Mondays were Conspiracy Theory and Supernatural Video days, Wednesdays were True Crime and Stupid Story days, Fridays were Real Talk with Video Games and Internet Challenge and Questions days

It was stressful, but you thrive under that stress, each video was perfectly planned and organised and Dewey helped as much as he could

The boy is practically a walking sound board, a lot of your background sounds came from him

Totally makes a theme song for your channel and you snag that up the second he plays it for you for the first time

People always want to see Dewey on camera, but you always filmed when he was at work and he was content to help behind the scenes

When you get Patreons, you feel so happy that you are just able to provide some sort of financial contribution for the first time in over two years

Little did you know that Dewey put that money aside to get you a better quality camera for your birthday

Eventually, you start live streaming on Twitch on your days off, just having a chat during your downtime. You get a Discord and with all of that, you get a few mods to help you out, having a video chat every Saturday afternoon to organise the following week

Whenever Dewey is home, he’s on you like an octopus so they get to see him lounging all over you, playing on his phone as you talk to your mods, occasionally asking for a kiss or if you need anything

They all think its cute as heck and beg you to do at least one video with him

So you do a special for Challenge and Questions day. Both you and Dewey do a bunch of couples challenges, live streaming it for your patreons and edit out the funny bits for the video. You also sing a song together, which made everyone go mental in the comments section

Eventually, Dewey becomes a semi-regular on your Friday videos.

When he starts at Horace Green, he doesn’t tell you anything about it. Just that its a new job

You are confused but trust him to do the right thing

When it all comes to light, you aren’t impressed

You refrain from saying anything, but the whole idea was stupid as fuck, did he really not think he’d get caught?

You are more angry at the lies, however, rather than the fact that he did such a stupid ass thing

When it all blows over, and he starts working there legally, you settle down

Visit him at work sometimes to see how he’s going

Turns out, some of his students are fans because now he can be more open, he won’t shut up about you and has brought up some of your less intense vids for everyone to watch

You decide to make a separate channel that is more kid friendly because “Dewey, you can’t show the kids the episode where I called someone a cunt.”

He forgot about that part

Basically, very supportive, your biggest fan and likes to help in the background as well as appear in some videos because it makes you happy and you both get to jam on camera together

Is also very kissy all the time and each video has to contain at least four instances of him randomly kissing and hugging you, it’s in his contract thank you very much.

[tarithenurse]

The good Villain - 5

Based on the prompt “You’re the villain and you know that you just want the ‘good guys’ to understand why”

Pairing: Loki x Fem!Reader (eventually) Content: Questions are answered but new arise, some not very veiled innuendos, some tension. Loki being a snack and a tease. Completely made up fake science. A/N: Well, last update absolutely gave me some fuel in the shape of reblogs and comments. Thank you very much! ​

Chapter 5

…   Loki   …

To find joy in life, it is important to find happiness in the little things, and although Loki would have appreciated to have been the mastermind behind the squabble…well, it is a delight to watch the Avengers argue amongst each other. The room is heavy with the scent of panic and anger, each new word spewed adding to the roiling ocean of chaos.

“But her vitals are fine.” Banner mutters at the edge of the group, knowing all too well that no one is listening.

If only the witch had been here, Loki muses. On the other hand, she would never have allowed the tempers to get out of control nor for the Trickster to sit calmly and watch the show with a drink in hand. Turning his head, he can see enough on one of the tablets on the coffee table to guess that the Betan has stopped crying. Leaking, she had said, so naïve. In hindsight, it does make sense that she would not recognize tears for what they are.

“ENOUGH!”

Loud enough to shake the glass in the windowpanes, Banner’s shout catches everyone’s attention and though they are still on edge, their concern is due to the slightly green tint of the scientist’s skin rather than the topic of the argument. With a single nod, he signals for them all to sit down and shut up. They do. Oh, can’t have a party every day. It would have been quite entertaining if the Green Brute had made an appearance.

“Thank you,” Banner groans, also collapsing into a chair, “right…now…I don’t care who said what and…’nd shit…” There is an audible gasp from Stark, thickly laced with sarcasm. “Just tell me, someone please, why she’d think she’s leaking?” The question might be addressed to the group in its entirety but the tired (and slightly bloodshot) eyes are trained on the younger Asgardian.

None of them have bothered to learn. “Isn’t it obvious?” Loki allows a tone of mockery to slither into the rhetorical question. “Sirius Beta is so close to its star that the temperatures are hundredfold higher than here…naturally resulting in immediate evaporation of free liquids. [Y/N] has simply…never seen tears.”

The disrespectful scoff is hardly a surprise even if it irks Loki to hear it from this many. And of course Stark is the one to object the theory, as he calls it, by pointing out the alien female’s tolerance to the Midgardian temperatures.

“She’d freeze!”

“Not necessarily,” the tamed growl of Barnes retorts hesitantly, “her…her physiology isn’t like ours and besides…there’ many ways to train or…to condition a body to withstand a broad array of situations.”

The man rarely speaks in large groups, and only then if closely backed up by his faithful friend, Rogers, if the former Winter Soldier voices his thoughts unasked while clearly drawing on his personal experiences. Screw the Hulk, this is far more interesting.

 …   Reader   …

You had not been leaking. You had not been melting.

Despite attempts over the last day cycle, you have not been able to reproduce the crying, and you have a theory it might have something to do with the mental state you were in when it first happened. What else can my body do? Lying flat on your back, you only have to turn your head to see the growing stash of water bottles tugged away under the bed. A simple test is all you need to perform to learn more about water. Is it salty too?

The bottle crinkles in your grasp, remaining slightly out of shape when you loosen the grip after unscrewing the lid. It does not smell of anything, you can barely feel it, as you allow a little to drop onto your finger.

“It’s safe.”

Technically, you do not hear the end of Loki’s statement, too busy squeaking in shock of him and the water sprouting upwards as you involuntarily squeeze the bottle. With a loud splash, it lands on the hard floor, the rest of the liquid joining it as you abandon any remainder of decorum to scramble away.

Safe? “It better be!” To be fair, it does not actually do anything but lie there and reflect the lights above in a shimmering pool.

“As long as you don’t inhale it…or if it’s not too warm,” the sneaky bastard purrs, “you’ll be fine.”

“…what do you use it for?”

There is a moment of silence where Loki stands with his mouth slightly open as though he has never been asked something like that before. Maybe it is a stupid question, but you have decided to learn as much about this phenomenon as you can. Liquids in general does make sense, like blood or lava, so all you have to do is figure out the workings of this.

“It…fulfils a similar function to many lifeforms like salt does to you, I believe. Perhaps you should not drink too much of it, actually.” You eye him but finding no deceit in his eyes decide to observe the topic of the lesson more closely while he continues. “We use it for cooking, bathing, a-“

“Bathing?” Now that is just ridiculous. “No sand?”

“Allow me to teach you, curious one,” he smiles.

It is garishly obvious. Something is making Loki think he has the upper hand or that he will somehow gain from the new arrangement. A careful person would deny him his wish. A person needing a change in a stalled situation has to use the opportunities as they present themselves which explains why you watch a section of the glass wall slide aside, granting him passage to your cell.

Once inside, he walks ahead of you to the niche where the basic necessities can be taken care of – you had recognized the seating arrangement for what it is already on day one. But Loki leads you past that, past the treacherous basin where you had discovered water to come out of a tap at a light touch, and towards an area with a thin glass door.

“See that?” He points to a few nobs and a sort of nozzle-arrangement protruding from above the wall. “That’s called a shower.”

With a fragment of hesitation, he slips off the long-sleeved tunic and dumps it on the floor, baring a surprisingly muscular upper body. Lithe and athletic, Loki is far from the bulky type of his brother or Captain, but he does not have to walk around my bed more than once, you admit with a pleased shiver.

The enthusiasm dissipates, however, the moment he reaches in and (as he calls it) turns on the water. You see the way the drops land on his arm, clinging to the hairs even when he continues to undress. Slight rolls of puckering of his pale skin travel towards his, unfairly nice, shoulder before skating out of sight together with the lines of scarring that prove the legends of Asgardian valor true. Dipping his head towards you, his eyes are twinkling at your attention to his now naked body. Shit, I was ogling.

“Yes, the water is a bit cold at start, but I’ll go in first…find a good temperature for you.”

No sense of modesty colours his cheeks, unlike the Captain’s would in this kind of situation. In fact, the blond, triangular man would mostly likely never get into a situation like this, let alone move in a perfect pace to show off everything. Ooh, that is a lot.

Scrambling to focus, you clasp on to the conversation. “You want me to go in there? With you? Hah!”

You are tempted, at least marginally, when he steps under the water. With his eyes closed, he allows the stream to guide the large hands along his limbs, and you have to battle the basest instincts to turn away and leave the way you came.

Marching into the cell itself, you are stopped dead in the tracks at the sight before you: Loki. Loki sitting dressed and dry on your bed with a shit eating grin lighting up those mesmerizing eyes. How? Sensing a movement out of the corner of your eye, you turn to see an identical figure at the other end of the room. A projection? Whatever the explanation, the Loki you had follow to the shower-thing is suddenly behind you, cold (and dry) hands grasping your shoulders.

“You really think I would let down my guard around you, pet?”

[meteor752]

So...I just watched The Rise of Skywalker

And it was...a movie

Now, if you don’t want it spoiled, then don’t click keep reading, because I will immediately start after that.

Got it?

Good

Now that that’s out of the way

THERE IS A CANON LESBIAN COUPLE IN STAR WARS AND THEY SHARED A KISS, I AM DEAD

Sorry I just had to get that out of my system

I am not a movie critic, and for the most part I just enjoy a movie unless it bores me. But I have been saying that I will do this review, and I will, so I will just go over important part by important part.

Good?

Good.

The first scene

This is, hands down, my favorite scene in the movie. The way they introduced Palpatine and that we never really see his face in the scene is really menacing, but still oddly hilarious.

I mean, the man is hanging there quoting himself. He later literally said do it!! I’m surprised he didn’t start to tell the story of Darth plagueise the wise.

Plus, the fact that Kylo doesn’t want to join Palpatine and become his apprentice, but just kill him, is really cool to me. It shows a little different side of his character, that he wants to be his own and not just the next Vader.

Also, after Palpatine saying “I created Snoke”, there’s a blink and you’ll miss it moment of a deformed looking Snoke in a cubicle, so that’s that character's backstory. He was a failed clone all along!

Poe, Finn, Chewie & the Spy

The start of this scene is just pure fluff between our dear space husbands and their mom’s, husband's dog.

The revelation of the spy was cool, but I kinda immediately guessed that it would be either Hux or Phasma.

I really liked the chase scene, plus the banter between the characters. Character interaction is a thing I love in franchises, and this movie does a good job with it

Master Leia

I LIVE FOR LEIA TRAINING REY TO BE A JEDI

The Rey training scene though was...unnecessary, dunno why it was there.

Rey’s always been a kinda on-off character for me. I like her when she’s loose and chill instead of a “badass”. In this movie...I mean she has her moments, but for the most part I didn’t want her there

C-3PO, R2-D2 & BB-8

The fact that BB-9e wasn’t in this movie is a crime

I like Threepio, like most other fans, but he’s just like always been...there for me. In this movie though, holy shit did he shine!

To be quite honest, he was probably one of my favorite characters in it, just because he kept that lightheartedness in an otherwise angsty movie, with some occasional fluff.

What I really like about him is that they made this his movie! Artoo and BB-8 were barely in it, and when they were they didn’t do much, so Threepio could really shine! Literally, he’s made of gold. The latest eight movies he’s basically been bullied by every character on screen, no one really seems to like him (Poe did it in this movie, so it’s still a thing) but they gave him a lot of screentime and I like that!

I don’t like BB-8. He’s mostly there to sell toys, and I get that that’s what Star Wars is all about these days, but don’t make it obvious!! Cough, cough PORG!!!!

Artoo was underused as kriff in this movie. He did basically nothing, despite being one of the franchises most popular characters. My favorite moment in the movie however is when Wiped Threepio And Artoo reunite, and he actually sound HURT when Threepio doesn’t recognize him!! He calls him his best friend okay!?!?

Lando

!!!!

His introduction was so fricking cute! Chewie just went to hug him instantly, because that poor fluffy boy has lost enough!!

Threepio going to explain who he is, and Rey just going “We know who he is!” Is so heartwarming, like he’s a war hero! People idolize him that’s so cute!!!

Knights of Ren

Will get more into them in another section, but look really cool but really underused

Stormpilot, Jedipilot, Stormjedi & Stormjedipilot

Let’s get this over with

All three of the first ships are evident in this movie.

Rey and Poe arguing about BB-8 and The Falcon at the start of the movie...is basically all we get for Jedipilot but what’d you expect?

Poe making Finn general, their banter throughout the movie, the little very unnecessary fight they had, the reunion at the end of the movie-

THIS

Rey: So what were you going to tell me?

Finn: We’ll take it later

Poe: What, you mean when Poe’s not here?

YOU JEALOUS BRO???

Finn wanting to tell Rey something was most likely confessing some feeling for her, but then they survived and yeah, and it was fucking dropped?! Did JJ just forget about that???

Plus, I’ve never noticed this before, but Finn yells Rey’s name a lot.

The reunion hug between the three of them at the end of the movie is what kinda made me like Stormjedipilot. Poe and Rey holding their hands over Finn’s back while he buries his head into their shoulders, like yeah I like that.

Chewie’s “death”

I, to be honest, kinda wanted Chewbacca to die a little here. It would have made Kylo’s turn so much more compelling.

So it is my personal headcanon that Kylo did not know that Chewie wasn’t on that ship, and for a few minutes he actually thought that he, Uncle Chewie, had died. Because I couldn’t be the only one who saw a bit of pain on his face.

Kijimi

I first did not like Zorii, mostly because I thought she and Poe would have had a “relationship”.

Though, when Rey held a lightsaber against her throat, and she just impressively said “Not that it matters, but I like you.”

Gal, you GAAAAY

And also that twice, twice, Poe asks if they should kiss and she dismisses both tries, that I like. Good job movie, god job.

During the raid, you can hear female Stormtroopers, and I think that’s really cool. We’re in movie nine and first now does there exist female Stormtroopers that isn’t Phasma!!

Threepio’s wipe is sad and I liked it, but I feel that they made it a little too sad, considering it was afterwards mostly played as a joke and then they gave him his memories back

Hux the spy

Again, Chewie should have remained dead, but whatever.

I have no problem with Hux as the spy, I was just sitting in the theater mumbling ‘Fulcrum’ while my brother was looking at me weirdly, but what I don’t like is what they did with it.

For Hux just to be shot by some General we’ve never met before is just the equivalent of a letdown, especially since so many people like his characters. Including me, he’s one of the best parts of the Sequels!!

Rey Palpatine

Just so everyone knows, I saw this coming. I mean sure, I still liked the Qui’ra theory more, but when Palps started talking about how he knew who the girl was, then I was just like okay she’s a Palpatine.

What I don’t like is how they don’t talk at all of how this came to be. Like, I don’t even know which one of Rey’s parents who’s Palps child. Who the hell did he fuck?!?!

So yeah, whatever twist, bad execution.

Endor’s Stormtroopers

THIS SCENE IS A PERFECT EXAMPLE OF WHY I DON’T LIKE REY

They often do this in movies. Heroes have to do something, they can’t do anything at that moment so they have to wait, main Hero does it anyways.

IT’S ANNOYING AS HELL

Finn and the Ex Stormtrooper I can't remember the name of’s bonding moment was cute, but I just kept thinking to myself “Are they siblings? Because it wouldn’t be the first time this has happened,”

Finn getting mad at Poe is weird as shit and I don’t like it.

Dark Rey vs Rey

Huge letdown didn’t like it next

Rey vs Kylo, final battle

It was...fine, I guess. I like that Rey fucking stabbed him, that was cool.

Leia dying to redeem Kylo was dumb! I get that they needed to kill her off in a natural way and not just off-screen but come on!

Plus, if you would ask me, Kylo didn’t need a redemption arc. I think he should have died. As a bad guy.

Han Solo And Lightsaber Toss

Han Solo talking to Kylo was cool, though how does it work?? Was it a vision? Luke manipulations the force? Kylo only saw what he wanted to see?

That Kylo just tossed his lightsaber was symbolic and stuff, but a really stupid decision from his part. How are you gonna protect yourself now, huh? THE FORCE?!?!

Rey going into Exile

THIS SCENE WAS FUNNY AS SHIT!!

Just, Rey, thinking that every Jedi goes into exile, when they don’t feel like dealing with it anymore, and she’s fucking right!!! Yoda, Obi-Wan And Luke would be proud!!!!

Luke’s force ghost also has nearly identical hair to Anakin, which is adorable. Dunno how many that noticed that, since the people I’ve talked with about the movie didn’t, but that was literally all I could think about.

Knight Leia

When Rey picked up her lightsaber, my brother beside me was like “That’s Luke’s green one!” And I got mad because that’s not his lightsaber design at all. Know your facts bro!

That Leia was a Jedi is understandable, I mean was Luke not going to train her? But I’ve always seen her that she could use the force, but didn’t use a lightsaber because she’s badass.

I kinda also wanted her blade to be purple? I think it would have fit her much better, as she is probably the most balanced Jedi we’ve had for a while and she’s got a lot of anger that little Skywalker, but blue works fine I guess. Better than green.

Star Wars Endgame

I liked this scene, it was cool, Artoo got something to do, and Finn and Rose riding those horse thingies is an inside joke between those two at this point, convince me otherwise.

Lando And Chewie arriving though, and the First Order stating that they are “just people”, was really beautiful. Cool scene all and all.

Rey and Palpatine

Palps is still quoting himself! He fucking said “Do It” JJ knows what’s up!!

One thing that I’ve been trying to figure out since I saw the movie was what the hell was Palps’ goal? He said for Rey to strike him down (Said the same to Luke, is he suicidal??) and then he would become? Apart? Of her? What?

I’m sorry, but that doesn’t make any sense.

Kylo vs Knights of Ren

So these are Kylo’s guys, right? His inquisitors, per say.

Except these used to be Jedi, his clanmates, his friends.

So why the kriff did they all turn against him like that?? AND WHY DID HE JUST FIGHT THEM BLINDLY DUDE THESE WERE YOUR FRIENDS!!

If I could have changed anything in this movie that has nothing to do with ships, then it would be that at least ONE of the knights would have supported Kylo and not just blindly turned against him.

Though I must say, Rey giving Kylo Luke’s lightsaber through their bond, was pretty badass.

Palpatine steals Kylo and Rey’s bond

The. Fuck.

WHAT KIND OF FORCE POWER IS THAT?!?!

IF YOU CAN JUST STEAL A JEDI’S FORCE BOND, WHY DIDN’T YOU DO THAT WITH ANAKIN AND OBI-WAN PALPS?!?!? HUH?!?!?!

But for real, stupid decision, could have gone without it.

Jedi Rey vs Sith Palps

It was cool, a cool moment, I sat excitedly and whispered to my brother all the voices I recognized, I think Ahsoka could be heard??

...

I looked it up and yeah her voice is there, which means that she’s dead R.I.P Snips.

One of the better scenes of the movie, though I think it’s cheating because of nostalgia and love for these characters.

(I LOOKED UP WHICH THE VOICES WERE, AND WE’VE GOT FRICKING AAYLA SECURA, LUMINARA UNDULI, ADI GALLIA AND KANAN JARRUS!!!)

Reylo

*Sigh*

Ya know, I really hoped this wouldn’t happen. I almost wanted to skip this, and really make all the Reylo fans mad.

But I have to talk about this.

This kiss, should not have happened.

Now if you are a Reylo shipper, that’s good for you, I ship way stranger things than that, but to actually make it canon?!?!

Kylo having a crush or something for Rey? Sure, I can understand that’s he’s pretty much obsessed at this point. But for Rey, badass Rey who is pretty lesbian, to have feelings for Kylo? THIS IS NOT A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP PEOPLE!!

And that they made a toxic relationship canon, but not a gay one, really says something about Star Wars doesn’t it.

Death of Kylo

I laughed out loud during this scene. Not joking, people around me were annoyed. And that his clothes didn’t disappear? Is Kylo a naked force ghost? Did he do that for Rey?

Wait

Don’t answer.

Happy Rebels

The Lesbian couple that kissed was obviously queerbaiting, and you should never praise that, but that is probably all we will get Gays, so let’s just take it and cry on the inside.

Is that Stormtrooper gal Lando’s daughter? Because my brother whispered that to me, and I got those vibes too. Or is she way older than what she looks like and we were supposed to see her as a love interest?

The hug was cute.

Rey Skywalker

I will never accept this as canon ever.

To see the moisture farm again was nice, I liked that.

And for Rey to finally have her own lightsaber, and a yellow one too (I read a fanfic where she had a yellow one, was that like pre-seen??).

But the Skywalker thing...eh.

I would have found it cute if she’d said Rey Palpatine, as if she’d embraced her origin and decided that the name Palpatine isn’t just to be afflicted with the emperor, but also with her, the last Jedi.

Also, did she go into exile? Because damn, those Jedi do that a lot!

All in all, I liked this movie! I wasn’t bored a single bit while watching it, as there was always something going on, and I like when that happens. I don’t think that had happened since Empire with a Star Wars movie.

It isn’t in my top three, but it’s up there, and better than The Last Jedi.

Though I must say, they did take some things from Return of the Jedi and put it in this movie, specifically the ending.

Though I must say, and don’t hate me for this, it was better than Return of the Jedi okay bye

[bearpillowmonster]

Jedi Fallen Order Review

I was going to wait and write this tomorrow but I feel like I have all my notes written down and a solid opinion already formed so I want to just jump into it.

(Non-Spoiler btw) I’m not going to compare this to any other game because every other review I saw said the same thing over and over, The only one I’ll mention is Kingdom Hearts because KH2 is my favorite game of all time so how can I not draw comparisons to it with everything I play. I also want to mention I’ve been playing on the base PS4 model not a Pro, I feel like I have to say that now with performance and graphical based opinions with big games such as this because you might not have the same problems.

I think they changed the way he got caught in the beginning from the trailer because it’s the same scene but different shots, it honestly made more sense because I was playing the game and didn’t even notice the droid watching them while it was much more noticeable in the trailer, maybe it’s meant to be that way so it isn’t obvious to Cal that he was caught. 

Main villain is the “Second sister”, it’s based on lore from Rebels. You would think you’d fight all the other “sisters” considering this is the first place I’ve heard of them (I didn’t watch too much of Rebels but researched it for this reason) but you only fight a couple during the game.

The coats are glitchy in cutscenes, so you should probably wear the basic layer for most of the game, if you want to try and avoid that. You are vulnerable while opening chests so you can’t defend or attack during animations but enemies can attack you. It will introduce the abilities through flashbacks so this guy knew these powers but just cut himself off to hide from the Empire and has to relearn them. At one point it will say “you are now reconnected with the force” and all the abilities will be shown on the skill tree in order to unlock, around this part is the turning point of the game (Kashyyyk/second time at Zeffo) because the opening is fine but the next section gets kind of boring because you have scarce abilities but once you start actually getting into it, it’s fun! I know they showed Kashyyyk in the E3 demo presentation they did a while ago so that was to be expected but it was just a matter of if it was a fluke...it’s not.

I’m pretty sure you lose skill tree points every time you die to an enemy (not falling off an edge or something) which is odd and it’s not like “since the last checkpoint” or “since last death” it’s a bit more than you gain in that time period, I’m pretty sure this revolves around what difficulty you’re on which is also pretty odd but correct me if I’m wrong about that theory. 

I knew I liked BD-1 already but I was a bit skeptical of Cal’s character when this was announced because he could’ve easily been generic but no, I kind of like his character, you can tell the actor went the extra mile partially through how he interacts with BD and everybody else. He’s better than Kanan in my opinion, who if you remember has a very similar backstory as “the Jedi padawan who survived order 66” but he blames himself for his master’s death which is a dead trope that I didn’t care too much to see.

I hate parrying, I absolutely hate it, not just this game, every game, even in Kingdom Hearts, I’ll barely use it because I don’t (usually) play on the super high difficulties where it’s necessary but this game has it as essential so you have to learn a little bit of timing...and wait until you can upgrade your dodge so you don’t have to parry as much. And they will punish you for missing a parry and just trying to slam them (only the more hefty enemies like the ones with shock sticks) because they have a shield meter and if you get hit by them then their shield will start to go back up. 

Some complaints, it takes a long time to respawn and the sliding is a bit off as well because you can control him while falling but he turns at such a slow rate that you might as well not even bother, it doesn’t matter most of the time any way but when it does then it’s annoying.There’s a lot of things that they just kind of brush past explaining, for example, there are these punching pistons that you have to run past and once you reach the end, there’s an opening above but you don’t know how to get there. I tried using force slow and jumping on top of the thing (logical way of doing it) but he doesn’t jump high enough (you don’t unlock double jump until later and it’s a life saver!). There’s a walkthrough for that simple one minute section on YouTube so I couldn’t have been the only one but you have to wall run and then jump off of it, I didn’t know you could wall run to get to higher ledges. Also with story, I wasn’t sure how they were figuring out where to go for some places, they just kind of said “go here!” but they end up explaining that kind of stuff later on which seems kind of pointless in saving it until that point, it would have been just as effective (if not, more) at the beginning. For those who’ve played it, I’ll give you a hint at what scene I’m talking about “Ilum”, if I was writing it, I would’ve made that scene towards the beginning.

Some little compliments are that BD-1 has a back panel that lights up, if your health is decent then it will be green, if it’s not then it turns red, that’s a nice detail “But what about Blue?” Well yeah there’s that too...that’s just for fun. There are also customization skins for BD-1 as well as your lightsaber and ponchos and guess what?! Your ship too! It’s no 13-13 or Project RagTag (there’s no gunplay though) but it’s still a pretty darn good game with some good music tracks (I mean it’s Star Wars though so...)

This game doesn’t have a dark or light ending so you don’t really have to worry about doing anything the wrong way, it’s fun to throw storm troopers off of ledges, not gonna lie, however I will say I feel bad at times. They added a bit of a grey area there because they’ll cower and say “Looks like I’m the last one” “No, stop!” “They’re all dead” “You killed them!” “Just...just leave me alone.” or something along those lines. BD even called me out for lashing out on them once and Cal just says “They just would’ve hurt somebody else.” I was like “Dang” there are some themes going on here that I think they would’ve made a light and dark ending if EA let them, however I’m fine with there not being one (even if it would make the game seem longer). 

Even Second Sister has a bit of a thing going on where it’s questionable about her point of view, it’s almost a grey area. 

Quick-fire round:

-Be careful, if you heal at a save point then it will also respawn enemies (you have to pick “rest” first before it does that).

-The creatures are harder than the troopers tbh.

-There’s a character called Mari Kosen on Kashyyyk which sounds a lot like “Ikari Gozen” which basically means ‘rageful female warrior’.

-I was worried about even buying this game because of EA’s track record (I almost bought Battlefront 2 before the whole debacle (Thank goodness I didn’t!)) and I didn’t want to chance they mess it up somehow after launch it getting good reviews, but I can confidently say that I don’t see any way they can do that now, should be no need to worry.

I’m not going to spoil it but the ending (though in line chronologically and could have messed with the timeline) seems kind of one sided, there are a bunch of things they could have done and while the decision they made makes sense, is it the best? I personally would have liked to see a bit more, it seemed a little short to me. I want to see what happens to these characters (which is a good thing) maybe there will be a sequel or extended universe book/comic (there’s already a prequel one with Cere) There are some really great moments in this game, I’m tempted to give it a solid 8 because of the high it ended on but I’m going to lower it a little due to the slow start being annoying. 7.5 / 10 Now EA better make more quality single player Star Wars products without stupid monetization schemes, this one was a success.

[the-truth-behind-redacted]

Dome’s Way Home

Dear Locket, Entry 5

While it's not exactly the most thrilling for me, it's now blatantly clear to me that there is more than the Sp-Tem(s) exist in this place. I also have reason to suspect that they are sentient on some level. Of course, the word I could be looking for is sapient but I have no way to check even if it is. The flashes of explosions break the field of vision and the calls of many different things echo above. It's very clear to me this is a war front and not some happenstance battle of two giant beasts. What worries me is that I'm slowly moving forward to that locations though it's angled off from my path.

However, the main fear I have about this is that war is an organized institution, or however you would describe it, and it requires some form of societal structure. I'm not saying it has to be advanced or even something like ours but a group with a unified reason to fight against another is near textbook war. This should go without saying that I am by no means at this point an expert of how things work here so for all I know this is a territory battle between two apex preditor groups that just because of the very alien way of these beings has caused me to confuse it for war. Hell, what the fuck do I know?

Way before I reached my current position where the battle is as clear as it is now, I decided to do a few other tests. The first one was just for documentation, however embarrassing it may have been, of testing sexual functions. I covered in either my first or second entry that many psychical functions don't affect me. This being the need for sleep, lack of fatigue, food and water, and the need for restrooms. Also, besides the auto weapon, no physical strain has been happening to me. This left one obvious bodily function that I needed to test while inside this undefined place.

To make a very uncomfortable story short, the answer is yes. I did feel an increase in body temperature during the progress as well as self-lubrication. Climax also happened with the excretion of climaxal fluid. Thought this was a humiliating process an interesting thing to note after is that I did feel a form of physical fatigue after climax. This, however, has made it clear that my bodily functions are still working, they just seem to be in a form of suspended animation until some very exact stimulus activates them. Why sexual stimulation is one of them, I don't know but it's very strange to me. That is to say, slightly more strange than literally everything else that's been going on.

Now on to the real reason why I'm writing this entry, I have found some semblance of a civilization in this deranged world. I call it a semblance because all that's left seems to be shattered domes that I can only guess served as some sort of shelter. This is built in the center of a mass of intersecting paths which only seems to suggest that these paths weren't built. They just seem to have been here beforehand. That would explain why these paths just stretch on endlessly without any seeming purpose or reason of existence.

There's something unspeakably horrific about this. It all seems so humanoid. Of course, it's not like any human structure I've seen but once more drawing back from old history, there was a group of people known as Esca-to. They were a group of nomadic people who lived in frigid temperature. I'm not quite sure how one would live in the cold without technology but they survived there for hundreds of thousands of years, supposedly. Then again, there wasn't a climate on Gee-Gerotous that could be considered cold. It is pretty temperate all over.

Anyways, the Esca-tos lived in the upper Northern Hemisphere of the planet Earth where it was mostly fridged. There was a lot of ice and snow that covered everything. Well, because of the climate in these areas, there weren't as many basic building resources. So instead of wood or clay, they used compactable snow. These igloos basic structure featured a dome of compacted snow with a relatively small crawl space for a person to get in.

Now, this information is the only common beliefe from what we have. Ancient historians disagree about much of this, especially the condition to why Igloos were the common form of housing, if they were even the common form of housing, if the Esca-tos were even the pioneers of this form of housing, and much more. Hell, there isn't even an agreement if the word Igloo was even used to refer to these housings. This is just the current working theory. It's hard to be 100% about anything if you don't have an active site to investigate, which brings me to this ruin (though I don't think snow would preserve well over thousands of years).

The site was massive, and I'm still quite impressed with how many different paths intersected in this one area to create as much space as it has. Many of the domes have caved in over time. In total there are 13 large domes and it's hard to tell how many smaller ones existed. It seems that before whatever was here simply abandoned this site, many of the smaller destroyed domes were piled together. Of the small domes that still exist there are about 15, only slightly more than the big ones. I guess the ones that weren't destroyed when they left are now the ones that caved over time.

It's important to mention that the terms small and big are absolutely relative terms to each other. I'm a decently sized woman, 5'8 (173cm), and the "crawl spaces" open up to well over my body size. If I was to estimate the size of the entire platform this was made on is about 5.5km*6km. The size kept within each of the large domes are larger than what most usual household sizes are from my world. Each large dome could house many families with enough space to segregate each family with walls to allow privacy. However, looking at some of the basic structures found in the domes that haven't completely collapsed suggest that they were used to only house one being.

The most intact large dome had only the entrance collapsed and some of the very center of the ceiling which fell into the housing. It took quite a while to move much of the mysterious crystal substance which seemed to compose everything in this world. Upon entering the first thing I saw was a bed structure. For the first time ever it was something that wasn't purple! Drape over a rectangular base was a golden "fur." Touching it wasn't comfortable at all. The fibers were like needles and I did puncture the tip of one of my fingers. If I die from an infection because of this, I'm going to be pissed. Well dead but I'm going to be pissed while I die that is if suffering doesn't consume me which it most likely will.

Carefully pulling it off saw what was underneath. The case was hollowed out and there was some kind of comforter. It was seamed together with a hardy pelt. It did bend and flow like a pillow but it wasn't quite as soft. I made a knife as a tool from my weapon, which only took a bit of focus, and cut it open. I pulled out what looked to like scales. Their color was a glistening velvet, green, and sea blue. They were surprisingly malleable. Each segment was lined and seamed together.  Honestly, it looks now a bit more like a sofa than a bed but it really doesn't share a similar look. Maybe if I flipped it but it's just a crystal flat surface. I don't understand its design.

I glanced around the room and much of the furniture was very much overside for me. Many of the chairs were like the oversized bar stools that go up to your waist. These were quite a bit larger, going up to my chest. I lifted myself up onto one and looked at the desk. There was an assortment of little nick-nacks. An object I recognized was an object to represents the physical property for every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. Known to us as the Casacal's Formation, named after the physicist from the group that uplifted our civilization to our current technological level, it has a set of objects evenly held together and lined up, in which one pulls one side of the formation letting it go and collide with a part that is resting which will cause the other end to launch out, pull back, and hit the resting part of the formation causing this to happen until one stops it or friction drags to a stop. Here, its called "Newton's cradle."

Another object was some weird singularity. Contained in a black tinted glass container, there is a swirling mass of energy that expands, contracts, and then condenses again in a flash of light before separating into two other masses of energy colliding and begin the cycle again. On the base on which the glass sphere containing the singularity it's labeled as "Matter Apperation Separation Cycle." It certainly doesn't seem to be scientific like Casacal's Formation as it didn't seem to be any kind of natural source causing the separation and recombination of the energy contained inside. There is also a warning on it saying to be careful when handling. I can only assume because the energy could cause massive damage if broken. I decided to put this in my bag in case I need a makeshift grenade.

There were three other objects on the desk. Two of the items seemed to be a computer. At least that what I think it is. Another object is a complicated assortment of in grove details, crystals that aren't purple (I'm sure God doesn't even know where the fuck those came from), and a broken set of what appears to be wires. Looking at what I would assume to be the computer tower, there's a massive empty section inside plus a bunch of other things that look like this world's tech. There's another object that looks like what I would think are fans. They are weird inserts with tubes running into them that have slits that air could pass through.

I don't know for sure but it all seems to be intact. All that appears to be damaged is what I would guess to be an internal power source. Near the possible internal power source and a possible computer tower is what could possibly be a monitor. It is really fucking big and very flat and has some kind of thin film screened over what reflects back as, what else, purple. I can see myself in its reflection and boy have I seen better days. This isn't important!

This old thing (I assume it's old) has really sparked my interest. Hopefully, somewhere around here there are instructions about this thing or at least manufacturing notes. Actually, wouldn't manufacturing notes be rarer than basic instructions of the product? Oh god, I'm beginning to treat this journal like it's a person that can answer my questions. I'm losing it. FUCK, focus you, dumb bitch. Alright, beyond the rest weird furniture that is around this place there doesn't seem to be anything else of interest. There are still quite a few other locations for me to check out. For now, I'll cut this and do another entry on the rest I find in the other caved in domes. I'll also check the crystal piles as well.

[belphegor1982]

New story! A little Don Camillo one-shot, set (roughly) between 1951 and 1957, my first foray into canon time for these guys. Hope you like!

Summary: Both Don Camillo and Peppone have a bone to pick with a trumpet player. Music has charms to soothe the savage beast, but what about the priest and the mayor? (on FFnet/on AO3)

THE TRUMPET OF CONTENTION

In the Lowlands, music, like a few other subjects, is something to be treated seriously.

Giuseppe Verdi is, of course, rightfully revered, and his name and works are one of the very few things that can make everyone – be they Red, Green, White, or Black – reach an agreement. It’s not even a matter of having culture or education: people pulled out of school as kids still know their Nabucco from their Trovatore. Folks will come by the music gene through blood, and you’ll find entire families passing down names like Radamès, Ofelia, Ernani, or Desdemona.

The Pedrettis were such a family. Iago Pedretti had a good voice for bel canto, his son Corrado played the bass drum, and when his daughter Leonora started to show interest for the trumpet, the little girl quite naturally found a place in the town band. She was singularly gifted, and before she was twelve years old, she could be found playing among the more experienced musicians on days of important events, wearing proudly her own bright white shirt and a cap that looked a little too big for her head.

The Pedrettis were so proud that, every time the band played, the whole family – grandfathers and grandmothers, aunts, uncles and cousins – went out en masse, all wearing their Sunday best, to see Leonora and her trumpet. They turned up for everything: town festivals, religious processions, political events, and so on and so forth. When Peppone was first re-elected as mayor, the band followed him and his staff on foot from the Communist headquarters to the town hall; as they crossed the main square, only a dozen metres from the church doors, the Pedrettis were first in line to applaud, even though every single one of them was a staunch anti-Communist and the band played Bandiera Rossa and L’internationale.

Don Camillo had watched the proceedings from the rectory door with his arms crossed, jaws clamped on his half-cigar, glowering at the blatant provocation. Afterwards, he went to the Pedrettis and protested to the paterfamilias.

“How can you let that little girl play for the Communists? Festivals and processions are fine, but not this Bolshevik propaganda!”

Pedretti was unperturbed.

“Reverend, musical talent is apolitical. As long as my little girl plays well, she can play whatever she likes within the limits of the law.”

Don Camillo bit his lip and left it at that. The day after he went to see Peppone in his workshop.

“Listen,” he said with a stormy glare, “the band aren’t half bad even though half of them are lunatics who still think Stalin is a decent person for some reason; they can parade in front of the church playing their nonsense as much as they like if they don’t mind having their bottoms kicked from here to Moscow if I catch them. But that little Leonora Pedretti is an innocent and I won’t let you recruit children for your Party.”

Peppone looked up from the motor he was working on and met Don Camillo’s eyes with a scowl of his own.

“I’m not recruiting anyone from the band. That kid is good with a trumpet, that’s it. Nobody’s making her wave a red flag around.”

“You’re right. She just plays the red flag song. Next time I’ll need music I’ll just hire the band from Molinetto. I hear they only play for funerals and processions.”

Peppone exploded. “Even you wouldn’t dare to do something so vile as that!” he shouted. “Just because you’re miffed I got re-elected –”

“Why on Earth this town picked you again knowing what you’re capable of is beyond me,” said Don Camillo huffily – especially as himself had, in what he considered a moment of weakness, voted for Peppone. “But no, your election in itself has nothing to do with it. The problem is that you and your henchmen are making a thirteen year old lass play music that could get her excommunicated, with her none the wiser!”

“If the Pope wants to set the Spanish Inquisition on people for playing music, that’s your problem, not mine! And I’m not the conductor, that’s old Gianelli’s job!”

“It’s the official town band! As the mayor and the boss of the region’s Communists, I’d say it’s your problem!”

They were nose to nose, sleeves rolled up, glaring daggers, and God only knows what would have happened if the sound of a lone trumpet, soon followed by a few other instruments, hadn’t reached them at that very moment.

It was rehearsal time for the town band and all windows were wide open to the cool evening air. Both men recognised the solemn tones of “Un dì, felice, eterea” from Il Trovatore. It worked surprisingly well, even without voices.

“Verdi will always be Verdi,” remarked Peppone quietly after a while.

“Yes he will,” said Don Camillo who had a lump in his throat.

They exchanged sheepish glances, feeling rather ridiculous now that the heat had died down. Then Don Camillo remembered exactly what had got him so worked up; but he shook his head.

“Look,” he said, “hear me out. We both know that the child has talent and Gianelli will soon be out of his depth because he only knows the basics of trumpet playing. She’ll need to study music seriously, in the city.”

Peppone nodded gravely. “I agree. Problem is, I know the Pedrettis. They’re poor as church mice. They couldn’t pay for music school even if they worked every second of every day for a hundred years.”

They stared at each other while the music drifted in on the breeze. Peppone put down the wrench he had been clutching and scratched the back of his head.

“I can have a whip-round around town,” he said eventually. “The Pedrettis aren’t very popular with my lads, but this is about making sure that a child of the people gets a decent education and a future. And we’ve all heard her play Verdi. Imagine what she’ll be capable of with a proper teacher!”

“I’ll convince the landowners to chip in,” said Don Camillo. “It won’t be easy, but I’ll wager they’ll listen to their parish priest. Besides, I can just point out the fact that she’d no longer have to play that garbage of yours.”

Peppone clenched his fists. But he breathed deeply and held out his hand.

“All right. Let’s see if the two highest authorities in the village can’t make this work,” he grumbled.

In the distance, the band struck up another song, faster and more spirited. Don Camillo shook Peppone’s hand heartily and walked away with a beaming smile while Peppone went back to his motor, humming along absently as he worked.

So it was that the town band lost a trumpet player, and little Leonora Pedretti went to the city to study music. An older cousin put her up; she paid for room and board by doing small odd jobs and delivering packages, and worked hard on both music theory and practice.

Leonora was not the first local child the village had helped on the way to higher spheres; it was rare, but not unheard of. The entire town contributed to the school fees: tenant farmers who barely had ten lire to rub together, die-hard Communist workers who called the Pedrettis ‘reactionaries’ and all kinds of unpleasant things, and even the rich farmers who found it easier to part with one of their limbs rather than money.

Such is the power of music. Politics often work their way through people’s heads; music always works through their hearts.

Years passed, bringing hot summers, hard winters, and one disastrous flood when heavy rains made the great river break its banks; people mostly waited till their houses were clean and dry before tearing each other apart over politics again. Elections came and went along with the years, and Peppone was re-elected mayor once more.

Through all that, the town folk cherished one of the real apolitical constants: the knowledge that their little trumpet player in training was doing a good job. The cousin she lived with wrote regular letters to her parents with news and the progress she made, until one day Leonora sent her own letters, because she had found a place she could live in by herself.

The few people who had the occasion to go to the city and hear her play all came back with reassuring words: the girl was good. Seeing her in the brass section in such deep concentration that she sometimes went cross-eyed justified all expenses and sacrifices. Her trumpet blended in perfectly with the rest of the orchestra, not a single note out of tune, which is the thankless fate of musicians without solos: to be essential, but easily overlooked threads in the big tapestry of orchestral music.

And then one day, as they combed through Leonora’s newest letter, Pedretti and his wife found a word that made them peer at the paper as though with a microscope. A word that was incongruous, fantastic, and truly and utterly foreign.

Jazz.

Their little girl wrote about learning to play jazz music.

The word was far from unfamiliar, of course. People listened to the radio, which often enough did feature music not composed by the classical masters. But in these parts, where land had history written in the blood of generations of farmers who lived and died on it not so differently than their parents had, and where the great river stretched out in the sun and in the mists, carrying hundreds of years of dreams, tears, and laughter with its mud and its pebbles, novelty and any of its potential contribution had to be weighed and studied before being allowed to become familiar.

Jazz was considered music, of course, but not ‘serious’ music. It was good enough for city people or foreigners – in other words, people who lived further along the country road – but not hard-working people who rose with the sun to feed the pigs, tilled the earth, or worked dairies, and then went to bed with their bones aching more every night.

The Pedrettis kept the letter and didn’t breathe a word to anyone, but soon enough, the word got out and ran throughout the village and its seven frazioni like an overexcited puppy. Unfortunately for the Pedrettis, it turned out that a lot of people had a lot to say on the subject, and much of what they had to say concerned young Leonora and the supposed lack of moral fibre in her upbringing. Nobody could agree on which would have been worse: the fact that a good, decent country girl, whom they’d known since she was little and who had received a proper Christian education had abandoned Verdi for the sirens of foreign music – or if that same girl had dyed her hair and gone around wearing make-up and short skirts.

Those whose opinion on the matter ranged from asking how bad it all could be anyway and not caring one bit what a person did as long as they were happy were sadly few and quickly drowned in the mass of gossip.

Chatter grew and grew until Leonora came back to her parents’ for a few days of holiday.

She had grown from a skinny child into a long, sprightly girl who walked with calm certainty and didn’t talk much. Her hair was intact, a little longer than it had been, and she wore no make-up at all. The folks who were still unsure about which of jazz or make-up was worse quickly made up their minds and decided on the former.

Leonora mostly stayed at the family farm for the first couple of days and to all intents and purposes remained blessedly unaware that she and her trumpet were all the village could talk about these days.

Since it was one of the few subjects which transcended politics, the more vehement critics soon referred to their own moral authority: the reactionaries and the little old ladies complained to Don Camillo, the Communists to Peppone in his capacity as the section’s secretary, and the others to Giuseppe Bottazzi in his capacity as mayor – which meant Peppone pulled a double shift. He was mightily annoyed about it all.

On one hand, it irritated him to no end that imperialist America had ruined yet another honest Italian girl, luring her with its newfangled ways and flashy… what exactly he hadn’t figured out yet, but knew he would have to if asked. And he couldn’t swallow the fact that a musician, after studying and playing masters like Verdi or Puccini – but mostly Verdi – could just move on to something so different as simply as that. It felt like a betrayal.

On the other, he had always had an argumentative streak, and seeing all those people finding fault in one girl bothered him a little. Leonora Pedretti wasn’t a political adversary and she hadn’t chosen to shoulder any kind of authority at all: she was only a trumpet player. And not even the kind to want to play Giovinezza or La Marcia Reale, either.

It was all very complicated, and Peppone didn’t like complicated.

In the end, he shoved his hat on his head one morning and went out to town.

It was market day on a fair, bright morning, and people flooded the main square. Peppone pushed through the crowd and the stands to get to the church parvis, where Don Camillo was sitting on his usual bench near the rectory door, reading a newspaper and smoking a half-cigar.

“Listen here,” he said, planting his fists on his hips, “what have you been telling your church biddies about that Pedretti girl?”

Don Camillo raised his head, looking curious.

“What do you mean?”

“There’s been no end of whiners and complainers knocking on the People’s House and the town hall lately telling me I should do something about that blasted affair. The Communists I can handle, but some of the others were your crowd and I’ve had it up to here.”

“Comrade, you’ve chosen to run for mayor and somehow you got elected,” said Don Camillo, going back to his newspaper. “It’s only natural that people will look to you to sort things out, God help them.”

Peppone was beginning to see red.

“When the girl was in the town band, she played the people’s music and you couldn’t stomach it. Now she’s not in the town band anymore and she’s playing American propaganda garbage! How do you like that?”

Don Camillo folded up his newspaper and rose to his feet.

“And what’s it got to do with me?” he asked in a dangerous voice.

“You’re the one always defending ruddy America like it’s a bastion of decency against the big scary Reds,” shouted Peppone, “and meanwhile the same America turns our girls’ heads and corrupts them until they forsake Verdi for some so-called music nobody can understand unless they speak English!”

“Reds never scare me, big or little!” bellowed Don Camillo, and he gripped Peppone by the lapels of his jacket.

Peppone grabbed him by the front of his cassock and roared, “I’ll see about that!”

Blood boiled, the pressure was off the charts, and blows would probably have started raining any second from two pairs of hands as big as shovels, when a loud, discordant noise sounded all around the square.

It was a noise like a duck getting stomped on, and it was just absurd enough to make both men freeze.

The market stand owners and the people around them had left their shopping to watch something potentially more interesting, namely a brawl between the mayor and the priest; but they all froze, too, and turned to the point of origin of that awful sound.

Young Leonora Pedretti was standing in the middle of the square wearing her Sunday dress and a defiant scowl on her face. In her right hand was her trumpet.

She breathed deeply, raised the mouthpiece to her lips, and began to play.

Later on, when people could reflect on it calmly, they realised things were missing, like a clarinet, a piano, some percussions, and maybe a double bass. But it was of little importance.

Music rose out of that little trumpet, a melancholic melody, like someone determined to keep hope alive through tears. The music – thin, bordering on reedy – trembled and tensed but always landed on its feet. It was a sound that tore a piece of your heart while telling you you were allowed to cry over it. Then Leonora segued into another song, more cheerful, cheeky even, with little high notes that sounded like winks, if winks could be turned into sound. It wasn’t mocking, however, but rather invited you to share a joke. The number was short, and soon gave way to a third song.

This time the trumpet was gentle and warm, the notes ample and clear, and the melody flew into the blue sky to the great river shining under the sun. And the people on the square heard, in the silence between breaths and in the quiver that punctuated the notes, the voices of men, women and children not so different than they were, who played and sang about hope, freedom, loss, joy, grief, their faith in God and their own great river that flowed majestically to the sea, carrying hundreds of years of blood, tears, and dreams not so different than their own.

Leonora held the last note and slowly lowered the trumpet, her face crimson from neck to hairline. She cast a last long look at the square full of people and walked away without a word. Everything she meant to say had been said.

Peppone and Don Camillo had loosened their grip on each other during the impromptu concert without quite knowing when or how. They both kept staring at the spot Leonora had been half a minute after she left.

“…Well,” said Don Camillo eventually in a voice that shook ever so slightly, “that wasn’t Verdi.”

“No, it wasn’t.” Peppone ran a hand across his eyes and fumbled for his handkerchief.

They looked at each other, opened their mouths to add something, but both realised at the same time that they, too, had said everything they meant to say.

They both took off their hats to each other. Don Camillo returned to his bench, still looking dazed, while Peppone went back home the long way, along the road on the main dyke, where he could see his great river and watch the sun wink on the muddy waters.

After that memorable market day, when Don Camillo received a complaint about girls who were no better than they should be and played music they should not, he threw out his arms and said, “I don’t know if it’s the Devil’s music. All I know is what I heard, and what I heard was so beautiful that I don’t believe God would leave it to the Devil.” And the crucified Christ on the main altar smiled, because he was right.

When the same people went to Peppone, he crashed his enormous fist on his desk and shouted, “The next wretch who says anything against that bloody trumpet goes through the window and learns to fly. Do I make myself clear?”

“Daddy,” his youngest boy asked him that very evening as his father went to give him his good night kiss, “what did that lady play the other day, exactly?”

Peppone vaguely sensed that the question had some importance; he thought long and hard before answering in a tone of finality, “She played the trumpet, and she played it well.”

“That’s it?”

“That’s it.”

And, as it turned out, he was quite right.

THE END

Thank goodness for music. The world would be so much darker, colder, and poorer without it!

Translations/Notes:

Red, Green, White, and Black: respectively Communists, Republicans (anti-monarchist, anti-clerical, and anti-fascist party, which was still left of the political centre at the time), Christian Democrats, and Fascists.

Radamès is from Aida; Ernani is from the eponymous opera; Desdemona and Iago are from Otello; Corrado is from Il Corsaro; Leonora is from Il Trovatore and La forza del destino; Ofelia stands out, being from a lesser-known opera (based on Hamlet) and not from Verdi.

Don Camillo voting for Peppone in his first re-run as mayor is a reference to one of the short stories, "Ancora il fantasma del cappello verde" (the ghost with the green hat again). The "ghost" is Peppone, who sneaked into the church in the middle of the night to pray for re-election and inadvertently left his hat behind. At the very end of the campaign, when it looks like he's going to lose, he makes an honest speech, straight from the heart, in which he asks his citizens to treat the election as a verdict on how good a job he did… and wins by a landslide. Don Camillo later admits to the crucified Christ on the main altar that seeing Peppone like this, sad and lonely, moved him so much he voted for him – and he's confused and furious about it.

I must admit fumbled with the chronology a little bit. Peppone's first re-election was in summer 1951, and the terrible flood from the Po river (some of it depicted in the second Don Camillo film with actual news footage) happened in both the real world and the "Little World" a few months later, in November.

Giovinezza (Youth) was the official hymn of the Italian Fascist Party, regime, and army up until 1943; the Marcia Reale (Royal March) was the official hymn of the Kingdom of Italy from 1861 to 1946. Both were usually played with the other, and both were forbidden after World War 2.

(If you liked, please consider leaving a comment so I know I’m not just shouting in the desert - not that I mind, but it gets lonely without someone to share it with!)

[ghostmartyr]

SnK 99 Thoughts

This post brought to you by liberal stealing from The Mincing Mockingbird: Guide to Troubled Birds. Because why not.

If you don’t think the ending tagline couldn’t be greatly improved by the addition of Gurren Lagann’s narrator, you are wrong.

So if this month was meant to make me think that everyone in that audience doesn’t have a gigantic destruction flag planted squarely in their midst, well, I’m clearly getting all the wrong signals.

We’ve got significant people from a bunch of major governments come to call. The higher up Marley soldiers that the people who actually run Marley don’t like are chilling. The Warrior kidlets have great seats. The parents of former Warrior kidlets have great seats. There are reporters. There’s a grand reclassification of a lie to an audience ever ready to redirect their Eldian fears and hatred. The current Warriors have been awayed from the premises. People from the East Sea Clan exit before the production even gets started. Willy is manning the stage.

All I’m saying is that if something were to go horribly wrong and a collection of mangled bodies appeared in the place of the crowd, it could be done without causing severe problems for either side of the conflict that we’ve come to know. The most significant losses would be the successor kidlets, and when it comes to the timeframe likely to be covered by the immediate plot, that’s close to irrelevant.

Except as meaningful emotional trauma for the current Warriors (plus Falco), who have ever so conveniently been removed from the audience.

The tension in this chapter points to something exploding, and I... really don’t feel comfortable pointing to any one side as the cause.

In one corner, you have Willy going to pieces over exposing a truth that his family has kept secret for a hundred years. Arguably, that’s a great reason to feel nervous. In the presence of Suspicious Happenings, it becomes one more tally.

In the adjacent corner, you’ve got a prominent member of the East Sea Clan coming to say hello to Willy before his performance. Despite the nation having the most noted interest in not being friends with Marley in the past, Miss Kiyomi is a quality of guest who is free to enter the green room at will, and implies knowing exactly what Willy is up to, and considers some combination of his behavior brave.

Then immediately leaves before his show starts.

In yet another corner, which is actually the nosebleed section of the show, Magath is expecting reports on anything unusual, and absolutely no one is calling the sudden departure of every single present Warrior unusual. Or one of the East Sea Clan peeps leaving early. Or Reiner straight-up vanishing with a Warrior candidate.

In a corner that is actually another basement, Eren is destroying what’s left of Reiner’s stability. By far the easiest corner to make sense of, but sense making is not for the early portions of this post.

Meanwhile you’ve got one faction definitely up to some immediate shady business, because you can’t really say dropping people down a hole is the act of a friend. Unless you subscribe to the Itachi Uchiha school of friendship, in which case, A+.

All that combined leaves us with a terrified circus master, and every prominent piece of plot significance being rushed away from the stage. With three of the available four Marleyan Warriors being collected in holes. The only one not in a hole is closest to Magath, as well as the brother of public enemy number one.

If something were to go wrong, the only Titans not in holes and known to be in Marley are the War Hammer and the Beast.

What gets interesting is that Eren is undeniably the party responsible for Reiner being in a hole, yet the obvious Marley counters to Eren and everything he stands for do absolutely nothing about preventing more Titans from finding themselves in holes. The page where Magath asks for reports on anything unusual, even the smallest detail, is accompanied by Willy stress drinking, and followed directly by the isolation of their Warriors.

Not a single person from Marley finds the departure of their Titans from the production worth commenting on. Pieck and Zeke both have marks of hesitance at complying with their instructions, but absolutely no one on the side they’re supposed to be signed to expresses any concern.

Even though they’re expressly looking out for anything unusual.

I like the idea of Paradis folks continuing their love affair with basements, and I think it would be neat if they’re responsible for Galliard and Pieck’s situation just because we’d get to see Our Heroes in action for the first time in ages, but... no one in the Marley chain of command finds this weird?

Their most powerful weapons get carted off on the night of a declaration of war, and it’s not worth a comment?

Blaming Marley for everything is really easy most of the time, because they’re generally up to no good. In this case, the only thing that’s stopping me is Eren’s involvement. Yeah, no one raises any alarms when Pieck, Galliard, and Zeke make their exit, but there’s also been no one casting suspicious looks at Reiner’s absent seat.

It seems like a really easy thing to claim that whatever happens next, Marley wants their A-listers carefully out of the way, but that would include Reiner. If they are involved, not knowing where Reiner is would be a major concern; you don’t drop people down holes unless the next move is going to be dramatic, and as wonderful as improv is, a lot of great drama works best if you know where your cast is.

Which introduces another fun question: Do the powers that be know where Reiner is?

The baseball mitt from last chapter at least planted the seeds of possibility for communication between Eren and Zeke. If (and the strength of that if is still in question) they have been in contact, and Zeke knows what Eren’s plans are for Reiner, in theory, Marley knows where all the major players are.

Zeke is Magath’s golden boy. He’s also Eren’s brother. He’s in the unique position of having ties that could make him privy to both sides’ tactics here.

He is also, as previously mentioned, the only one not in a hole.

I have no idea whose plan is winning out here, but the sense I get is that there is some kind of “I know you know I know you know” hustling going on, and someone is planning to take advantage of the openings that the other side’s plan leaves.

Basically, the one thing that can be said for certain is that someone is plotting a thing. Too many pieces have been moved too deliberately.

You’d think pinning the blame for a war that hasn’t started yet on a person you’ve never met would be enough for one night, but where’s the fun in that.

...I guess I’m already close enough to that to dive right in, so yeah, in the non-conspiracy theory section, Marley still continues to be horrible!

Like. Let me see if I have this right.

Diet Reiss’ production is all about revealing the true story of the island’s origins. It did not come about purely through the strengths of the Tybur family and Helos, but by the grand design of Karl Fritz.

Karl moves a whole bunch of Eldians off to Paradis and quarantines them, leaving behind a threat that is a total lie, because he’s actually sworn to peace.

He’s the true hero of Marley’s liberation, and so deeply ashamed of what his people have done that he offers up complete surrender to any of Marley’s decisions involving his people. Because his people have no inherent right to life, and he has the right to offer their lives up as part of his personal atonement--though in the meantime, if Marley could hold off a bit on killing them until he’s dead, that would be super rad.

Essentially, continuing the theme of bad parenting, we enter the names of the fathers of modern society, because wow were you all about grand gestures that don’t mean a damn thing and screwing over lots of people because it was easier than fixing the base problems.

Following that, though Willy leaves that part of the story out, Marley proceeds to tarnish the good name of the one Eldian King who helped them for the next century. While reminding all the good little Eldian children that the island is pure evil, and they should do their very best to not be like that.

Yeah, the shocked looks on the kidlets’ faces are depressing.

And of course, the reason Willy is explaining that they’ve spent a hundred years lying about the island is because, hey, the island may have started out a totally chill utopia, but in recent years, the ~*evil*~ Eren Yeager has stolen the power keeping it that way, and now the island’s back to being a real threat that we’ve absolutely gotta do something about!

So enters the latest chapter in Marley being terrible.

This makes my head hurt.

“Surprise, King Fritz was the good guy all along, and we were lying about how dangerous the island was!

Except now we’re not lying and it’s back to being dangerous.

Burn the witch.”

It’s like the boy who cried wolf, only the boy is also a wolf, so are the poor sheep, and really, however it plays out, any peasants unfortunate enough to listen to the boy wolf’s warning are going to get eaten alive. As are the wolves standing on the wrong side of the property line.

The point is, I hope this story ends with Willy being disemboweled.

In other news, Annie’s dad qualifies as one of the better parents we’ve seen solely because he actually cares about his daughter being alive.

Seriously, Reiner’s mother is terrible. She’s so pleased for Bertolt’s father, dying with all of the comforts Marley has to offer because his son dies a noble death as a teenager, and tries to extend that compliment to Annie.

Lady, as far as you know, you’re talking about dead children that your own selfishness condemned. Your son is a basket case thanks to trying to make your life better while you were too much of a coward to do something about it yourself.

(It is more complicated than that. I am not in the mood to care.)

Just... what the heck. A parent caring about their child living should not be noteworthy. The fact that Mr. Leonhart’s honorary status means less to him than his child should be a normal thing, and it isn’t.

If it wouldn’t permanently break Reiner (save that for the things that actually are his fault), I’d be in favor of Karina being disemboweled as well. She’s the only one who’s gained anything out of Reiner’s mission, and she’s happy to take advantage of the spoils even though it’s ruined her kid.

Though to be fair, it’s entirely possible that she hasn’t paid Reiner enough attention to notice that.

Speaking of Reiner!

I do like the opening flashback, bringing the old man up again.

Annie and Bertolt can’t help but dwell on some of the unpleasantness they’ve seen and caused, but Reiner avoids thinking too deeply about it until it slams into him like the Armored Titan slams into walls.

Today, playing the role of the Armored Titan, we have Eren!

Playing the role of walls, the much acclaimed, ever loved, sanity of Reiner!

Yeah, that’ll go well.

Eren’s done his homework. He’s already injured, so restraints won’t stop him from transforming if he needs to, and the massive destruction that a transformation from either one will cause means that he can get his point across without violence getting in the way. If they fight properly, people will die, so play nice.

(For the record, unless he’s fallen off the deep end worse than anticipated, I don’t think he ever intends to harm the people he’s effectively taken hostage. Eren’s always cared about life. Removing that during a timeskip is cheating of the highest magnitude. More to the point, though, Eren’s chosen a threat that requires absolutely no follow through to be effective. Reiner cares about life, too. It’s pure psychological torment, but the only one hurt by it did sort of kill his mother and thousands of other people.)

Reiner’s expressions this chapter are a gift. He’s terrified out of his wits, confronted by a ghost whose memory put a gun in his mouth, and no part of that strain gets kid gloves.

My favorite part, though--well, if I’m honest, there are several favorite parts to this show.

The first one is Reiner’s response when Eren tells him that he’s here to do the same thing that Reiner did.

There’s a lot to be said about how Reiner deals with being a fundamentally moral person who has done a long string of terrible things.

The summary is, “Not well,” but this whole sequence is such a dang microcosm of why Reiner’s head ends up snapping.

He serves Marley. He does his best for them. He protects his home, his family, his comrades. It’s his duty, and everything outside of that isn’t something he needs to think about. He puts it best when he transforms on top of the wall. He doesn’t know what’s wrong or right, but he’s going to see his mission through to the end.

Except Reiner likes to hide his own moral complexities from himself.

He’ll go along with whatever Marley’s plan is. With distinction, even.

But the second Eren says that he’s going to do what Reiner did, there’s only one response. He’s shaky, scared, and horrified. Because what he did to Eren’s people is an abomination. Reiner can’t even grasp why someone would want to do something like what he did.

Eren understands Reiner’s choices better than he does.

He is not gentle about it, and he’s not kind, but Eren gets what Reiner’s lost in the storm of his own conscience.

“You guys were trying to save the world.”

I think somewhere in the last four years, Reiner forgot that he meant that justification. The things he’s done have practically destroyed him. There isn’t any apology or action that can make up for it. He’ll stick to his mission, because he’s a Warrior, but outside of that frame of reference, there is no escaping the horrors or guilt.

(So work really hard at sticking to that mindset.)

But when he first joins the military on Paradis, he states his intentions clearly.

He’s here to save humanity.

Whatever he’s done, and whatever will come after, he means that.

It just so happens that what comes after is so horrible that I don’t think he can bear to connect what he’s done with anything like good intentions.

Eren still can.

He spends the whole chapter sending Reiner to a place that he would very much kill himself to get out of, and he’s still the one who looks at Reiner, and the awful, horrible things Reiner has done to his life, and say that it was born of good intentions.

Reiner hasn’t had the luxury of that kind of understanding. Ever. He can’t get it from himself, because his heart or mind would break at even having the conversation. He’s not going to get it from his friends, because one’s dead and the other mostly hated him before he left her behind. All that he has is memories he can’t share, and guilt that no one around him could even begin to understand.

And Eren might not be okay with any of it, but he sees the one kernel of good that is torturing Reiner, and he acknowledges it. They’re both between a rock and a hard place, and they’re trying to save the world.

It’s a more generous description of what Reiner’s done than he would ever be able to offer himself, even believing it, and for a second, I think the fact that Eren sees that gives him a sliver of hope.

He can’t keep it, because Reiner is damaged beyond belief, but for those few moments, he has someone who understands the best of him.

Best ship or best ship?

Naturally, they’re both still on opposing sides, Eren has just been announced as the world’s Worst, and Falco is watching this all quietly screaming, but hey, something went sort of okay and people aren’t yet dead.

Tune in next month to see that changing.

Oh, wait, I don’t think I did proper justice to Falco’s experience.

There we go.

[duggardata]

Update:  When Will SiRen Tie The Knot ?

Previously, I predicted that Josiah + Lauren would marry on June 8–9—but that was using March 5, 2018 as their engagement date.  (That’s the day Us Weekly reported the news.  We didn’t, and still don’t, know the exact day Si proposed.)

Since then, a strong theory has emerged that SiRen got actually got engaged in February, not March—specifically, on (or just after) February 23, 2018.  More on that after the jump...  But, assuming it’s true, how does that effect their wedding date?  Let’s take a look.

TL;DR—

Friday, May 25, 2018 looks promising.  If SiRen says “I do” on that date, that is the closest they could come to having an engagement that’s both exactly average and exactly median.

The Mean ± 1 SD Range and Median ± 1 MAD Range overlap from May 15—June 5, 2018 which includes the following weekends:  May 18 (Bride’s Birthday)–19, May 25–26, and June 1–2.  All are probable!

Based on the data, it’s 95% Certain that Josiah + Lauren will tie the knot between April 28—June 18, 2018 (Median ± 2 MADs).  (The Mean ± 2 SD Range is slightly shorter.)  The included Fridays and Saturdays are:  April 28, May 4–5, May 11–12, June 8–9, and June 15, plus the dates above.

Personally, I’m guessing May 18, 2018.  It’s Lauren’s birthday!  How cute would that be.  Also, it’s far enough before Kendra’s due date to avoid an issue, there. 

What Makes You Think Si Proposed in February ?

Somewhat recently, Anons on @keepingupwithfundies​ astutely pointed out that Jessa + Ben were wearing wore the same clothes in their congratulatory videos for Gideon’s birth and SiRen’s engagement...

Intrigued by this, I followed–up, re–watching all the videos, and discovered that the Vuolos were also wearing the same outfits in both videos...

IMO, this strongly suggests that the Vuolos and Seewalds recorded their videos to Joy + Austin and Josiah + Lauren on the same day—which, in turn, suggests that Gideon’s birth coincided with Josiah’s proposal.  But when, exactly?  Well, we know for sure that Gideon arrived on Friday, February 23, 2018, at 3:39 PM.  After that, on Monday, February 26, 2018—the day that Counting On Season 7 premiered—PEOPLE exclusively announced Gideon’s birth.  Then, on February 27, the Duggar Family posted their typical slew of videos, congratulating Joy + Austin.  Finally, a few days later, on March 5, 2018, Josiah + Lauren announced their engagement—again, doing so on a Monday.  As with Gideon’s birth, video congratulations went up the following day. 

So, basically... If the Vuolos and Seewalds recorded their congratulations back–to–back, as their outfits suggest, then we know SiRen was engaged by 2–27–18—the day Gideon’s videos came out.  Personally, I think they recorded them the day of Gideon’s birth.  Gideon was born at 3:39 PM, which leaves plenty of time to record the video that day.  Also, in the past, Duggars have definitely recorded videos the day–of—doing so, e.g., for JoyStin’s and JoKen’s wedding.  So yeah, I’m using February 23, 2018 as SiRen’s engagement date, for now.  While I’m not 100% sure, it’s a good guess based on the information I’ve got!

Let’s see how this effects their probable wedding date...

With A Feb. 23 Proposal, When’s The “I Do” ?

As y’all know, we’ve got six married Duggars on our hands—Josh + Anna, Jill + Derick, Jessa + Ben, Jinger + Jeremy, Joy + Austin, and Joe + Kendra.

Here’s a chart, showing how long each couple was engaged before marrying—

Note—So far, every Duggar has said “I do” on either a Friday or a Saturday.  For SiRen’s wedding, I’ll assume that trend will continue.

Minimum

So far, Jessa + Ben’s engagement, highlighted in green, is the shortest—only 79 Days long.  If SiRen wants to beat this record, they’ll have to marry on or before May 13, 2018.  That’s a Sunday, so let’s say Saturday, May 12, 2018.

Maximum

On the other extreme, Joseph + Kendra had the longest Duggar engagement to date, at 105 Days in length.  If Josiah + Lauren wed on Saturday June 9, 2018 or later, they’ll beat Joe’s record.  (Note—June 8 or 9 was my original predicted date, based on a proposal date of March 5, 2018.  It’s not my guess anymore!)

Mean (Average), Probable Range, Outliers

Doing the math, the mean (average) Duggar engagement lasts ~92 (91.833333) Days, with a standard deviation (SD) of ~11 (10.8) Days.  Assuming that Duggar  engagement length is normally–distributed, we’d therefore expect most (~68% of) Duggar couples to marry 81—103 Days after the proposal.  Further, there’s a <5% chance that a Duggar will wed <70 Days, or >113 Days, post–proposal. 

If SiRen has a Duggar–average (92–Day) engagement, they’ll marry on Friday, May 25, 2018.  For them, the 68% Probable Range begins on May 15 (Mean – 1 SD), and ends on June 5 (Mean + 1 SD).  Those are both Tuesdays; since the wedding will almost certainly happen on a Friday or Saturday, that makes all of the following dates probable—

Friday, May 18, 2018  (Lauren’s Birthday!)

Saturday, May 19, 2018

Friday, May 25, 2018  (Mean Date)

Saturday, May 26, 2018  (Forsyth’s First Anniversary!)

Friday, June 1, 2018

Saturday, June 2, 2018

Extending to ± 2 SDs (70–113 Days), on the assumption that SiRen will be like 95% of Duggar couples, we can safely say they’ll marry between Friday, May 4 and Saturday, June 16, 2018.  As such, the following dates are also possible—

Friday, May 4, 2018  (Shortest Engagement by 9 Days)

Saturday, May 5, 2018  (... by 8 Days)

Friday, May 11, 2018  (... by 2 Days)

Saturday, May 12, 2018  (... by 1 Day)

Friday, June 8, 2018  (Tied for Longest Engagement)

Saturday, June 9, 2018  (Longest Engagement by 1 Day)

Friday, June 15, 2018  (... by 7 Days)

Saturday, June 16, 2018  (... by 8 Days)

If SiRen fails to marry on one of dates listed in these three, bulleted lists, they’ll be an outlier.

Median, Probable Range, Outliers

Let’s try calculate this again using a different ‘central value’—median, instead of mean.  A median resists high and low data points, so it’s more accurate than an average in some cases—namely, if your data is really scattered and irregular.  It isn’t really, here; however, it’s still fun to calculate things multiple ways!

Looking at the data, a median Duggar engagement lasts 90 Days.  Calculating a normalized median absolute deviation (MAD)—which works exactly like the SD, but for using with the median—the result is ~13 (12.602) Days.  As such, we can be pretty sure (68%) that the Duggars will marry 77—103 Days after a proposal, and nearly certain (95%) that they’ll wait at least 65, but fewer than 115, Days.

Applying this to SiRen, their median wedding date (Proposal + 90 Days) would be May 25, 2018.  (Nifty, that’s the same day we got with the average!)  Further, we can be pretty sure that they’ll tie the knot within the Median ± 1 MAD Range, which runs from Friday, May 11—Tuesday, June 5.  With the Friday or Saturday Rule, their probable wedding dates are—

Friday, May 11, 2018  (Shortest Engagement by 2 Days)

Saturday, May 12, 2018  (... by 1 Days)

Friday, May 18, 2018  (Lauren’s Birthday!)

Saturday, May 19, 2018

Friday, May 25, 2018  (Median Date; Mean Date)

Saturday, May 26, 2018  (Forsyth’s First Anniversary!)

Friday, June 1, 2018

Saturday, June 2, 2018

Finally, the Median ± 2 MAD range (65–115 Day Engagement) is April 28—June 18, 2018.  Thus, the following dates are possible, but not probable—

Saturday, April 28, 2018  (Shortest Engagement by 2 Weeks)

Friday, May 4, 2018  (... by 9 Days)

Saturday, May 5, 2018  (... by 8 Days)

Friday, June 8, 2018  (Tied for Longest Engagement)

Saturday, June 9, 2018  (Longest Engagement by 1 Day)

Friday, June 15, 2018  (... by 7 Days)

Saturday, June 16, 2018  (... by 8 Days)

If Josiah + Lauren don’t marry on one of this section’s three, bulleted lists, they will be an outlier.

Personally, my money is on May 18, 2018.  It’s a bit fast, like SiRen seem to be, and it’s right in the normal range.  Plus, it’s Lauren’s birthday!  (Which is not just cute and sweet, but also better PR.  Better to marry a 19–Year–Old than an 18–Year–Old!)  Finally, Joe and Josiah are close, so I think Si would try to schedule the wedding around Kendra’s due date, at least sort of.  May 18 seems like the ideal compromise:  It’s a Friday just outside of prime wedding season, it’s right in the typical Duggar range, it’s Lauren’s birthday, and Kendra won’t yet be full–term.  May 18, it is!

[bunchofrosies]

How To Get An A* In A-Level Psychology

Hi All!

So I feel like this is something a lot of people doing Psychology will ask me when I tell them I got an A*. Some people have told me “You’re so smart, of course you got an A*”, but really I did so much revision for Psychology, and so I’m going to give you guys some tips on how to do the same. So, to give you guys some background I studied AQA A-Level Psychology on the new reformed A-Level. At AS I got a B, and at A2 I got an A*. So while this blog will mainly be for people on the AQA specification the advice I give can help people on other exam boards too! So the specification is split into three papers in A2, each each paper as a different set of topics that are examined on. 

Paper One: Social Influence, Memory, Attachment and Psychopathology.

Paper Two: Biopsychology, Research Methods and Approaches. 

Paper Three: Issues and Debates, (Three options which will be chosen by your school mine were: Gender, Schizophrenia, Aggression).

No matter what topics your teachers choose the advice I give you will be relevant to all. So let’s get started

Pick the right text book

The CGP revision guides are a no go for an A*. They are far too basic, and barely have any evaluation. The text book I mainly used was the Oxford text book with the cat on the AS and dog on the A2. These text books are incredible, they have so much information, and lots of practice questions. Alongside that the Illuminate Publishing ‘green haired girl’ and ‘pink haired girl’ revision guides were good for some areas. For example, the green haired girl book had AO3 for the ‘role of the father’ which were not in the Oxford text book. However, with the Illuminate books their AO1 and AO3 are in nowhere near enough detail to be able to achieve an A*, and therefore should be added to when you do your revision from the Oxford text book. The links for these text books will be below:

Oxford - AS and Year 1 Textbook

Oxford - A2 and Year 2 Textbook

Illuminate - Year 1 Green Haired Girl Book

Illuminate - Year 2 Pink Haired Girl Book

2. Exam Technique

Firstly, within exam technique I will share what I did in each exam in terms of timings and order of answering questions. In every paper I did all the shorter marks first, and when I encountered any question with eight + marks I would do a quick bullet pointed plan on it and then move onto the next shorter mark question. Then at the end I would go back and do the essay questions. This is a clever technique for a number of reasons, most people usually do the shorter mark questions in a very quick time and therefore by doing all of those first you can see how long you have left to write the essays. For example, in one paper you may have two sixteen mark essays and an eight mark essay, and you may have thirty forty five minutes left in the exam, that way you can allocate fifteen minutes for each question, which even that may be excessive. Having as much time as possible for essays is extremely important as these are the biggest chunk of your marks, and you get more marks for quality over quantity. 

Make sure when you answer essays you follow this structure:

A small AO1 section - do not go over the top with the amount of AO1 as this is only six of sixteen marks in a big essay. 

For AO3 always signpost with statements such as ‘A strength of...’, ‘A weakness of...’ and ‘A limitation of...’. 

For AO3, follow the same structure of each paragraph

Signpost: Introduce the point and clearly state whether it is a strength, weakness or discussion point.

Make relevant evidence or explanation: use a study or explanation to evidence your point.

Explain in relevance to the question focus: link the evidence back by explaining how it shows a strength or weakness of the theory.

You should aim for each essay to have around four paragraphs of AO3, however if you do not have the time to do this DO NOT try and squeeze a small paragraph in that is unexplained properly. The mark scheme emphasises the quality of evaluation and therefore having two very well written and relevant AO3 is much better than having four tiny and generic evaluation points. 

3. Revision

In terms of revision for Psychology I did mind maps from the Oxford books, and I did these once in lots of detail in different colours. I then wrote the essay for that topic. For example, if I had just done the mind map for ‘Types of Long Term Memory’ I would then write the essay for that, with AO1 written in one colour, AO3 strengths in another, weaknesses in another and discussion in another. Then I would condense these down into essay plans with bullet points to summarise each paragraph. I did this for every single topic.

I also made posters for the studies, on these I would very simply state the participants, the procedure, and the findings of the study. This made it so much easier to memorise the exact statistics for the studies. 

4. Past Papers/ Specimen Papers

Now once the learning has finished this is when you start doing past papers or specimen papers. It is vital to do ALL of them as similar questions can come up each year. And to make it less daunting having done all the essays already you can just test that you know the info by making an essay plan for it but then not writing the essay if you don’t want to. However do have at least one attempt of each paper in timed conditions, as timing is what most people struggle with.

You should aim to mark your own work as well and try and work out what the mark scheme asks of you. And be a harsh marker. Don’t do the “Yeah, I was gonna put that” be harsh and be honest. 

5. Learn Research Methods

Research Methods is 40% of your marks. This means that even though it has its own section in Paper 2, it comes up on every paper... In my Paper 1 that I did in 2017, the entire Social Influence section bar two shorter marks were research methods! And one that I would definitely revise loads is statistical tests, make sure you learn when to use them, I did this through posters and flashcards. 

6. Videos

On the day of my exams I went onto YouTube. I never do intense revision on the day of exams, I try to chill out, I might test myself a little bit and discuss things with my friends but I very rarely did any note taking or anything intense. Instead I watched videos on Tutor2U, their videos on last years AS papers examiners reports were so informative as were their revision videos. I’ll link them here but watch them at any stage of your revision because they are a good way vary how you revise. I’ll also link some other channels which are good for watching if you want to revise in a different way, but make sure you don’t just watch the videos, take notes or repeat what they say. Make sure it sinks in.

Tutor2U

CrashCourse

So, the most important thing to remember is that as long as you put in the work you will get the grade you deserve. Whether that’s an A* or a C, if you worked hard then well done!

I hope this helps everyone and if you have any questions that I haven’t answered please don’t hesitate to send me a message! 

Whoosh,

Rosie :)

[hopefulfestivaltastemaker]

December 13, 2020

My weekly round-up of things I am up to and thinking about. Topics include Faster Growth, Fairer Growth; cities and pandemics; the learning effect; the hydrogen economy; and the Great Stagnation.

Faster Growth, Fairer Growth

This is the title of a new piece by Brink Lindsay and Sammuel Hammond, of the Niskanen Center, outlining their policies. I’ve always liked the Niskanen Center, and so it is nice to see so many ideas in one place. So now I am going to nitpick.

In the section on housing, I like how Lindsay and Hammond take a more broad-minded view of the problem than just to blame the NIMBYs. “The problem, rather, is that the current structure of land use decision-making gives massively disproportionate influence to those narrow interests [NIMBYs].” They praise recent moves by Minneapolis and Oregon to liberalized zoning, as well as possible upcoming federal moves. The section is not nearly as broad-minded as it could be, failing to address the space vs. speed tradeoff with automobiles, remote work, the role for housing subsidies, among other matters.

The section on decarbonization is all right. It starts out with the theory of pricing externalities, which is a good libertarian introduction to carbon pricing even though the Niskanen Center doesn’t identify as libertarian anymore. They make this statement, which causes me some worry:

“Accordingly [to the learning curve theory], we endorse well-designed mandates and subsidies that accelerate the deployment of clean technologies as an important additional component of sound climate policy. Furthermore, public financing of supporting infrastructure for clean energy deployment — for example, electric vehicle chargers and CO2 pipelines — can also help to accelerate the rollout of new technology and associated learning-curve effects.“

This is true in theory. The problem is that defining “well-designed” is devilishly difficult and an open invitation for undeserving companies to seek subsidies. As described below, I’ve at least made an attempt to justify subsidies quantitatively, albeit highly incomplete. There is no such attempt here.

The immigration section is good on its own terms, but it contains this statement: “Expanding immigration can help to compensate for demographic trends that are highly unfavorable for growth“, followed by description of said demographic trends. We come so close to making the case for explicitly pronatalist policies here, but the authors stop short. It’s not clear to me that expanding immigration, even if there is political will, will be any easier than increasing the birth rate, and immigration as a source of population growth will only be available for a limited time because the demographic trends are worldwide.

This statement made me very happy:

“We therefore reject the misleading distinction between developing and developed countries, as if the United States has reached some kind of end-state. On the contrary, economic development is a process that never ends, and without proactive diversification, even frontier economies can fall short of their full growth potential.”

In the section on infrastructure, the authors zero in on NEPA as expanding to the point of making it expensive and time-consuming to build infrastructure. Infrastructure is a complicated issue, and there isn’t (at least to me) a clear explanation of why costs tend to be high in the United States. Misuse of the NEPA process is one of several explanation that are offered. I would offer labor law, overuse of consultants, and mission creep by public agencies as other plausible explanations.

There are many other sections that I don’t know enough about to comment on. But overall, I think the document is worth a read for anyone who is interested in Niskanen’s work.

Cities and Pandemics

There was an article this week by Christian Britschgi on the outlook for cities in light of Covid. The article was a major feature for Reason magazine, and I think Christian’s first one. Anyway, it is a survey of a wide range of issues that have come up for the health of cities this year. It explicitly addresses the role of automobility and remote work in a balanced way. The article is well worth reading.

Pricing the Learning Effect

One question I started addressing this week is whether and how the learning effect for technology should be priced. It is quite a difficult question and I am still far from having a satisfactory solution.

The learning effect is, essentially, if a given technology is built, the price of that technology should go down. The learning rate is how much it goes down. Wright (Theodore Paul Wright, not the Wright brothers) first developed the concept in the context of aircraft costs. Chen, Samadi, Reeves et al., Hax and Majluf, and Goldie-Scot have good overviews of the concept, with Samadi focused on energy production and Goldie-Scot (of Bloomberg New Energy Finance) on lithium-ion batteries. Since the price reduction helps everyone, perhaps the learning rate is an external benefit that merits a subsidy. We can then try to calculate that benefit.

Learning curves are an important part of the clean energy analysis and a major justification for the investment tax credit and production tax credit. So it is important to get the numbers right. I dislike the handwaving that occurs that learning curves justify any and every subsidy for favored technology, but they do justify some.

For my effort, I assumed that learning curves would reduce the cost of a technology in the future but would not lead to any additional deployment. This is probably a fair assumption for a mature technology, but for immature technologies (and for deciding which ones are mature), more careful analysis is needed.

One of the nice features is that, when there is more deployment of a technology, two effects occur that cancel each other out. More deployment means that the learning effect is diluted, so (in the case of energy technology) there is less reduction in terms of cents/kWh, but that reduction is spread out over a large amount of deployment. As long as the learning rate holds constant, the learning benefit will also remain constant. Of course, I don’t have a good idea of how accurate the constant learning rate assumption is.

I estimate that there is about a 1.1 cent/kWh benefit for solar PV, 1.2 cent/kWh benefit for offshore wind, and 0.2 cent/kWh for onshore wind. Due to the bespoke manner in which most of the world builds nuclear power, a negative learning rate has been observed, which means that costs should go up with more deployment. I think a negative learning rate is absurd, but I can’t justify any positive learning rate for nuclear power so I assume zero. One of the promises of small modular nuclear reactors is that construction can be more standardized, so a positive learning rate will be possible. The same effect could be achieved by standardizing construction like France and South Korea sort of did.

It’s not clear how much of this benefit is actually an external benefit that merits subsidy, since individual providers capture some of the learning benefit. So the above figures might be considered upper bounds of the justified subsidy from learning effects. Additionally, for a mature technology, building of one thing means that another thing (probably natural gas or coal) won’t be built, which means they won’t benefit from learning effects. Should there be a tax to reflect how natural gas and coal will be made more expensive? Keep in mind, the learning subsidy is distinct from greenhouse gas reduction subsidy.

As mentioned, I am unsure how to deal with less mature technologies. It could be that building more solar PV reduces the cost, which induces most solar PV to be built. Does that justify a higher subsidy? I’m a bit doubtful, since the second round of PV will presumably be subsidized as well, and we don’t want to double-count benefits. But for very immature technologies, like ocean energy, the calculus may be different.

Hydrogen Economy

I also spent some time this week on the hydrogen economy (sections on Hydrogen, Ammonia, Methanol, Synthetic Fuels, and Methane). The basic idea is that, for decarbonization or energy independence, we should use hydrogen or hydrogen-derived fuels for a portion of transportation, industry, and residential and commercial heating. I won’t go over all the details, but I did find a few interesting things.

First, hydrogen from electrolysis (green H2) may have lower emissions and be more “pure” for having avoided fossil fuels, compared to hydrogen with carbon capture and CCS (blue H2), but green H2 is significantly more expensive and hence carbon mitigation costs are higher. I estimate a mitigation cost of $67/ton for blue H2 and $402/ton for green H2, based on IEA figures. The latter figure is too much, but the former figure sits within mainstream ranges of the social cost of carbon and could be a basis for starting a hydrogen economy now while we wait for electrolysis costs to come down.

I was surprised to find that comparable costs for ammonia and methanol are lower, only $13/ton carbon abatement cost for CCS (based on the same IEA report) and up to $150/ton for electrolysis. I thought that to make ammonia, you had to make hydrogen, so the abatement costs of the two should be the same, but perhaps I am misunderstanding something. Similar figures hold for methanol. Ammonia and methanol have a big advantage in that they are easier to transport and use as fuel compared to H2, and as we speak Australia is considering a big ammonia export terminal for exporting renewable energy. They are both suitable for transoceanic container ships, which cannot be electrified directly.

I don’t have figures for synthetic fuels with CCS, but synthetic fuels from electrolysis remain prohibitively expensive for mass production. In the United States at least, it seems that all methods of synthetic methane are prohibitively expensive as well due to low natural gas prices, though coal gasification for methane and methane-derived products is fairly popular in East Asia. Coal gasification, and other forms of gasification, are topics that I want to know more about.

All in all, I’d have to say that figures for hydrogen economy are more promising than what I thought when I started this exercise. Ammonia and methanol, and products using them, look like the most promising routes to go. Ammonia is good for load balancing and perhaps a superior alternative to HVDC that I haven’t seriously considered, methanol can be blended right now into the gasoline supply like ethanol, without modifying engines, and both are good for transoceanic shipping. There are a few gaps in my knowledge that I need to fill, though.

Great Stagnation Revisited

A few weeks ago, I noted some of the “New Optimism” writings which view the world as being on the cusp of a more rapid advancement in technology. I complained that there was a lack of rigor, that New Optimists didn’t have a good explanation of why, or even if, stagnation was occurring in the first place and what if anything is different about the current period as opposed to the recent past.

There is a piece this week, which Tyler Cowen linked, making similar arguments in a much more articulate fashion.

Yes, there is some neat stuff happening in the technology world, like the mRNA vaccine, Starship development, AlphaFold, quantum computing, and renewable energy, among others. But I don’t see this year’s developments as anything fundamentally different from the past few decades, and I see the structural reasons for stagnation intensifying if anything. And so until I see some rigorous evidence to the contrary, I’m afraid that I think the stagnation hypothesis holds.

[transientpetersen]

A little something about morality. Enough of my life has been spent working with mathematical structures and other theoretical constructs that the patterns of thought trained for those modes have bled through to other parts of my life. Morality is a core facet of life and its been shaped by the math just as much as the rest.

Generating complete mathematical proofs taught me more about skepticism than any other experience in my life. So often on the road to proving a theorem you will encounter the thought "it would be really convenient for this logical structure if fact X held". You can see how all the pieces fall in to place given the solidity of X and X probably has a certain internal plausibility and if X just held in truth then you could move on from this proof to something more relaxing (you may or may not have an unhealthy amount of animosity toward the proof built up at this point). It's tempting to write your first line "it's trivial to show X holds", sketch out the rest, and hope you've kicked up enough dust to pass - I've encountered my fair share of "proofs" using that structure. The sticking point is, it is mathematical maturity not to take the easy route of hope and instead to demonstrate the rigour required to generate a complete sound answer. And there's a reason for this. Your intuition in this area is untrained and often you discover (forging ahead) that you cannot prove X. After a lot of sweat and a pinch of luck you discover the counterexample or contradiction inherent in X that renders it false - the true proof proceeds along other lines.

This general lesson is useful. Convenience or wishing will not make a thing true and intuition should remain tempered with humility. This was actually one of the nails in the coffin for my religious inclinations. So many doubts and questions are answered if religion X is correct in its foundational claims but that has no bearing on whether X is true (only that its comforting). If you're honest with yourself then you cannot use that reasoning from most convenient world.

The next lesson comes from complexity theory. Sure complexity theory is an offshoot of the study of algorithms and so carries the faint stigma of applied mathematician to the theoretician but, stigma aside, it is a deep field full of interesting structure. Far more than I can render here so let's focus on one part. Complexity theory separates problems into an infinite leveled hierarchy depending on how hard the problem is to solve. In general, a problem is on level n+1 of the hierarchy if you can solve it when given access to a magic box that instantly solves any problem on level n. This simple picture is somewhat complicated by the fact that we don't know yet whether there are truly infinite levels or whether the structure collapses to some finite number of sets. This uncertainty is a source of some unease within the community.

Personally, I hold that the hierarchy is infinite because I believe that any universe where this is not true is simply not perverse enough to resemble our own. If my faction is correct then it is a point of mathematical correctness that there problems where its strictly easier to recognize a solution than it is to generate one (that one might also generalize, good writing and good editing are parallel skills but the first seems strictly harder than the second). By way of canonical example, its easier to verify given variable assignments to any random boolean equation than it is to generate those boolean assignments from scratch (verily, humans must earn their truth assignments by the sweat of their brow). This is the lesson I want you to learn from this section: when you see someone present an argument or a position and you compare it to your world view in a away that makes the argument seem both completely revolutionary and completely obvious, you have to step back and give them credit for locating that idea in the first place. This is a non-trivial amount of work. Conversely, when you recognize a particular solution to a general problem, give yourself a pat on the back because you've done something real.

An aside here, I realize that the spirit of the second part clashes somewhat with the lesson of the first part. All I'll say is that it all rounds down to humility and a conviction that issues we don't already recognize as easy almost certainly reduce to something intractable.

Let's talk about solvable. Wait, first a second aside - this is the true power of quantum algorithms. There are methods to use the uncertain nature of quantum bits to to quickly search the entire space of possible solutions and with high probability locate the exact solution to a given problem. It feels like magic and will revolutionize our world when engineering catches up to theory.

Let's talk about solvable. In particular, what do you do when the problem you wish to solve lies in one of the higher levels of the hierarchy, the levels we can't reach? Unless you're prepared to spend ungodly amounts of time on it or you get insanely lucky then you don't get to know an exact answer to the particulars of the problem. You *must* reframe it in a way that allows for an approximate answer, in effect transforming the question into a cousin living lower on the hierarchy. You're being forced to compromise, the universe is built to make you use heuristics. This is important - it's not about heuristics being quicker, it's about exact methods not being able to give you answers at all. Integer programming looks a lot like linear programming but it is in fact significantly more difficult in the general case. The structure of the universe means you must think in probabilities and in error bars and ponder trade-offs, in short the judgment no one asks of an oracle.

An event occurs in front of two of us. I know what I witnessed. And I'm almost certain that you didn't blink. And it's highly probable that you know I witnessed it. And its pretty likely that you think I think you witnessed it. And so on, with a little bit more uncertainty creeping in at each moment of recursion. This sad state of affairs is fine for the most part because usually the stakes are so low. But ask yourself how much more you'd care about common knowledge if your life depending on my having witnessed precisely the same event as you. We hear about that failure mode in the context of criminal trials all the time. Building shared knowledge requires enough work that it's used in the bureaucratic filter for asylum seekers and green card applicants. When you see one person able to get a group to agree on one particular interpretation of facts, remember that you just witnessed something hard. True common knowledge is infinite levels of recursion in the stack and it is impossible. For every situation, there's a point where the probability on the next level is too low for confidence, it's just a question of whether you calculate that far. And the probabilities deteriorate faster the more people you add.

We started with some fairly basic math truisms and moved through some hand-wavy logic constructions, let's end with something obscure. Communication is not free. If I want to learn about something that's happening far away or coordinate some communal action, I have to rely on messages that take multiple hops to reach their destination. We still have not mastered error correcting codes for common speech, much less methods for achieving better clarity in communication (case in point, how nonsensical most of this post reads), so your messages are going to get altered en-route. Beyond that, you're still the victim of the network. The effort/uncertainty of message sending defines a finite limit in the number of hops that we can use and still feel confident in the response. There are certain pathological graphs in which the vast majority of nodes believe thing one but when polling only their k-distant neighbors will come to believe that thing two is actually the majority belief. This is beyond government censorship or Overton windows, this is about never being able to know whether your mental image of society is accurate or if you've just been deceived by the structure of your communication.

It's the end and you're feeling cheated because I didn't say much about morals despite promises in my very first sentence. Morality as we understand it today is a bunch of ad hoc, best effort responses to a set of questions that were poorly defined in their original contexts and which haven't altered to match the multiple ways our social world has changed. If you've read the above then you realize solutions are hard and solutions to problems with many parts are harder. Social solutions addressing problems involving many people are worse and pro-social solutions are monumental. Answers are always going to rely on guesswork, methods need to be able to be executed under uncertainty, and if you think a general code of behavior is easy then you're wrong. You must cultivate judgment because the universe is not built to let you offload your thinking to some perfect algorithm.