#doesn’t all have to be me helping him
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yeah so this was insane
#i feel like too many people reduce this interaction to jason being like ‘lol same’#but idk :/#this chapter is from jason’s pov#and leading up to it he’s like ‘people keep walking on eggshells around me bc of the the michael varus stab wound’#and he hates it so when he goes on deck to help out with the storm#everyone’s like wtf except for percy#and jason states how much he appreciated percy not treating him like a sick kid#and i feel like it’s echoed in this sentiment where jason could say so many things like#‘you should never feel that way’ ‘im here if you need anything’#but he doesn’t make percy feel alone in his desire to just…. end it all#which ik for some people that doesn’t work but you’re not a character in hoo and percy is dealing with so much guilt#and he can’t tell annabeth bc she’s a main aspect of that guilt#and he doesn’t wanna guilt her more and he feels ashamed and when he describes this he feels weird for feeling it#so having jason this tough guy be like ‘yo i understand it bc i felt the same way#that’s gotta mean a lot to percy#also insane how jason who also struggles to display vulnerability#allows it in one of few times in this moment just so percy this guy he’s supposed to be jealous about#feels comforted and not alone in his guilt and shame#and also it’s just insane how jason’s wanting to kay em ess does not get talked about AT ALL#and just seeing his mom and the pressure of new rome getting to him#like this scene is insane and i’ll never shut up about it#also ignore me i’m just finishing my reread of hoo that took all summer#jason grace#percy jackson#pjo#ashla.txt
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I like how I gave Frida two flags when she only needed one, meanwhile David has to squish both flags together. To be fair, it’s just like Frida to be incredibly organised and bring multiple back up flags, and for David to panic and not do that.
#which direction is his transgenderism? don’t ask me complicated questions#look all I know is that little guy ain’t cis#we as a fandom do make him mtf a lot which is AWESOME#but it’s also really sweet to imagine him as ftm#especially since he grew up with Frida#I imagine she helped him a lot when transitioning when they were little kids#frida is totally the kind of little kid to angrily correct adults misgendering people#David is probably too shy to correct people but frida is not#Hilda probably doesn’t know what being trans is until she moves to Trolberg and she thinks it’s so cool when she finds out#also nb Hilda! I think she uses she/they#she’s just like yeah I’m sort of a girl and I’m proud of that but I’m also definitely nothing close to a girl#like she doesn’t have a preference for either#I could see her using any pronouns other than he#I don’t think she’d use he#idk why#anyways those r just my headcanons happy pride!#hilda#hilda the series#netflix hilda#hilda netflix#art#my art#digital art#fanart#drawing#Hilda (Hilda)#David hilda#Hilda david#frida hilda#Hilda frida
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One of the biggest things that makes me see Leo as trans is absolutely the size of his carapace in comparison to his brothers’.
And I’m not talking about height! I’m specifically looking at his shell here, because when you compare him to the others, particularly Donnie who is nearly the same height as Leo, it’s very clear that Leo’s carapace is much longer in proportion to the rest of his body.
Like - standing side by side, even though Donnie is shorter his carapace ends noticeably higher up than Leo’s does. And I like this not only because it really helps push the idea that Leo could very likely be trans (or intersex!), but it’s also just a fun design difference between them.
(It also lends way to future scenarios of Donnie eventually getting taller than Leo, but sitting down still has Leo being the taller one haha.)
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#trans leonardo#rottmnt headcanons#rise leo#trans leo#it’s like 4 am and I’m having trans leo feelings again sorry guys#totally get if other people disagree with me on this! but it’s always gonna be my no.1 headcanon fr#his complexion the vibrancy of his colors staying even in adulthood his general demeanor and this? this hc is LOCKED in my brain#plus the times Leo’s depicted in pink white and blue throughout the series like I KNOW it wasn’t on purpose but damn if it doesn’t help#(his nails are also the exact same as his toe nails/claws but I don’t super count this one tbh)#(even though it is TECHNICALLY another point in favor of trans leo)#(mainly because all the boys’ nails are very much more humanoid than turtle)#(just like how their tails aren’t really a factor either since we see them only in their baby forms and never again)#I really like the idea that he was a female red eared slider pre mutation#and Lou Jitsu’s dna paved how his humanoid features came out (aka a more masculine build and voice)#but his turtle features are all very much more in like with a female res#love the thought of rise bros meeting og comic turtle boys and Leo being like wait you guys are res too?? but…you’re not colorful……#one headcanon I have is that - you know the cute chirping and stuff we have the boys do?#I like to think that Leo’s chirping actually sounds more feminine to himself and his bros (so he tends to not do it)#idk I love thinking about this hc a lot and there’s no time like four am to talk about it huh?#future scenario has future Donnie going up to future Leo all smug like ah Nardo how’s the weather down there#and Leo’s all like good *sits down* why don’t you join me :)#Donnie: …*sits and stretches his neck out to be taller still*#Leo calls him a cheater but Donnie calls it ‘making use of his species’s advantages’#but yeah basically for many turtles the case is - bigger carapace? female. smaller carapace? male.#so it’s very interesting to take that knowledge and apply it here#did you know one of the turtles that this rule of thumb DOESNT apply to is alligator snapping turtles? male ones are the bigger ones there!#by a big difference too so Raph’s size makes a LOT of sense
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minor spoilers for @mantequillamcwhoremick ‘s fic Chaos Plan, Chapter 20!!
How I pictured that one moment in chapter 20 when Kenny spotted Kyle and Stan
#PLSPLSPLS IF YOU ARE A BUNNY FAN GOOOOOO GO READ THIS FUCKING FIC#CHAOS PLAN IS SOOO GOOD#I SWEAR SOMEDAY I WILL MAKE REAL FANART FOR CHAOS PLAN#for now…. this is all I have the time for#my ass DID NOT want to do homework#also pls….. forgive any perspective mistakes……#and just general messiness of the sketch I did this in like 2 and a half hours#I freehanded all of the perspective guides so just suspend your disbelief just a little if something seems off#ALSO YOU KNOW WHAT'S WORSE THAN PERSPECTIVE??? FUCKING *CARS* IN PERSPECTIVE#me and my homies HATE cars /j#poor Kyle is gonna have a worse male pattern baldness than Craig’s dad with the amount of stress he’s going through in this fic#anyways the line was so funny to me I know it didn’t elaborate on it much but I couldn’t help but picture this scene#just Kenny glancing over at Kyle’s house….. only to see his next death if Harris or chaos doesn’t catch him first#shroomer's sketches !#south park#kenny mccormick#kyle broflovski#stan marsh#chaos plan#shroomer's archives: south park#mysterion
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I have a lot of thoughts about this new Wanpre episode but one of them is how much I adore Satoru and Mayu’s friendship. They’re so gentle with each other and kind. I can see real life friend dynamics when I look at them. Satoru is always kind to everyone but he always reassures Mayu (like in Episode 20 when she’s worried Iroha is mad at her) and while Mayu teases him about his crush on Iroha (tease isn’t the right word, prods maybe, I don’t know if there is an existing word that describes what she does. I call it ‘a girl who reads a lot of Shoujo and cares about her friends) she is genuinely very considerate and gives him a space to talk about it openly. And I think they’re so sweet.
#wonderful precure#pretty cure#precure#satoru toyama#mayu nekoyashiki#this is not a ship post#this is a friendship appreciation#I just think this is rare#Precure doesn’t usually have caring platonic m/f friendships#But because Satoru is so kind to everyone all the time#(like in the episode where Komugi runs away he gives her a space to talk)#it makes me root for him because it’s all genuine how kind he is#Satoru’s relationship with others helps me appreciate Satoru/Iroha more#and is probably why I like them
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I genuinely cannot describe how deeply DEVASTATED I am about riz being the only one who can take stress tokens for the others. Yes fig is a protector and will fight endlessly for her friends and I love that about her but there is something about the way riz loves his friends. It’s a more subtle kind of love, but just as relentless and passionate and he will take any burden for the people he cares about and bear the weight of it on his shoulders so they don’t have to deal with it without any hesitation. I am ILL.
#the way that murph immediately volunteered to take a stress token for Kristen without skipping a beat#AND THEN HE TOOK A FUCKING SECOND ONE WHEN THEY STILL ROLLED BAD#something something you will dig until your own hands are bleeding something something#god that quote still haunts me I will never stop thinking about it I swear to god#he works so hard#and he doesn’t ever ask for any recognition or anything in return because just helping is enough#making sure the people he loves are okay is enough for him#this stupid little goblin man makes me want to throw up /pos#he just cares so deeply for everyone around him#i love him so dearly#my silly little fella#dimension 20#fantasy high#d20#riz gukgak#fantasy high junior year#OH AND DONT FUCKING THINK FOR A SECOND THAT IM NOT GONNA TALKING ABOUT GORGUG MOTHERFUCKING THISTLESPRING. BECAUSE THIS BITCH /aff#he’s going to have so many stress tokens by the end of this it’s so unfunny and it is making me unwell#I just. I just want them all to be okay and happy and not stressed and GODS they all need a fucking hug#they’re all traumatized and stressed and stupid and silly and I love them all so so much#eats them#puts them in a blender#throws them into a washing machine and watches them spin around#sobs violently#I’m so ill about them#sorry for the rant#i will be back#and I will talk more I’m not actually sorry that’s mb#the tags are like a whole ass paragraph of text but that’s okay#i just think they're neat
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Paul protec
Emma protec
Emma and paul protec
Paul no protec 😔
#idk why but that first image of him racing to charlotte makes me cackle#oh hey look i still have too much time on my hands#starkid#the guy who didn't like musicals#team starkid#tgwdlm#starkid productions#paul matthews#emma perkins#paulkins#jon matteson#lauren lopez#so we all know how paul refused to help bill with his daughter in the beginning but then goes with him to save her plays out#well you can kind of say he has similar arcs with charlotte and ted#because in the digital ticket you can see him overhearing charlottes conversation with her husband but doesn’t say anything#but when her husband is coming after her he gets in the middle of it#and ted wasnt invited to beanies essentially left behind but then paul goes back for him#im reading too much into it i know#im still sick i have nothing else to think about other than my misery haha
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POV: You’ve been drawing for clients all week, and you finally decide to stop and draw something for yourself. Wyd? 👀
Anatomy practice
That present for your brother
Backgrounds
Hands
♡✨BUSTER MOON✨♡
#Buster Moon#sing movie#sing 2#my art#Do you like his SERIOUS DIRECTOR look? 🤤#what a boss#he produces he directs what doesn’t he do#tell the truth I guess#just kidding#would I like some more Buster? yes please#have a generous helping#I love him so much it’s not even funny#seriously though drawing Buster is like therapy for me#if I have unpleasant feelings and then I draw him then poof all better!#my muse#illumination#illustration#furry#show business#musicals#director#artist
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I was rewatching mouthwashing, and I ended up thinking of the different reactions that Curly and Jimmy had in doing their tasks. How during the scene of Anya evaluating Jimmy and showing dread towards the idea of doing his evaluation, Curly was the one that offered to take it off her hands. He had no issue with adding more to his plate, because he knew - or well, thought, he knew that Jimmy wasn't going to "bullshit" with him since he's known him for a long time. When Anya hands Curly a note from Swansea, Curly goes to check out what the issue is and he takes care of it without a complaint, the only "complaint" he has is how this incident could have damaged the pods. Which is reasonable, those pods are their only way to be saved if anything tragic happens on the ship. However, in comparison to Jimmy being asked to do things, he's passive-aggressive about it. When Anya asks Jimmy if he could help her out with Curly's painkillers, he tells her that people should be worth their titles, specifically using her title as a nurse when she asked him for help and then when she says forget it, since he made her feel insecure, he still goes "Oh no, I'LL take care of it" as if he was doing a chore, a favor for her. Then, there's that part where he blows up at her for things that she didn't even ask him to do - more so the others asked him about it, like the code scanner, him deciding he needed to find the axe for the foam, and then, there's the medicine part (which when she does ask, and she reconsiders - going to do it herself, he takes that away from her). Jimmy complains about the tasks he has to do and he treats it like a big issue, a "woes me" that he has to do this and that - wanting the praise of the capital without actually doing any work. While Curly doesn't complain about it, in fact, he even mentions that he's aware of how well he is doing at his job as a Captain during that cockpit scene with him and Jimmy. If Jimmy only had to do a small amount of tasks to get irritated and annoyed at being captain, while Curly didn't which I feel like encapsulates their personalities. Curly understands what he's doing is a job, it's a responsibility, why would he complain at any point for doing what he's suppose too? Why would he be upset at people asking him to do tasks? While Jimmy on the other hand, isn't used to it at all and it's different to what he's had before and he's realizing that he doesn't actually like doing the work he has too. I just wanted to ramble about it even if it seemed kind of obvious xd
It’s obvious but it is a thing people miss or understate when trying to find parallels in Curly’s and Jimmy’s relationship/personalities.
Like the way people portray it as neither taking responsibility when it is almost split down the middle of Curly taking responsibilities and faults that shouldn’t be his and making himself unequipped to handle the ones that are while Jimmy refuses to handle the responsibilities he has because he wasn’t expecting the work that comes with them.
Not a lot to say but people forget that another thing the game comments on is prioritization of issues and responsibilities and how the guys fail at it in one way or another in the situation.
#this talk of responsibility is more so about me be very annoyed with people acting like Swansea was the most responsible man on that ship#when he immediately takes a break after his intern in stuck in the foam starts drinking the moment he find out the mouthwash is alcoholic#doesn’t tell anyone about the cryopod or explain himself and did nothing about Jimmy either until it was too late#like I’m sorry but he is also the last guy I’d like to hear about responsibility from cause he did just as bad as Curly post crash like he#wasn’t even nice to Anya outside the one conversation we see he was actually just as rude to her as he was Daisuke when they cracked open#the crates and dismissive before hand like I’m getting more mad at the glorification of one guy vs the woman whose doing the most 4 herself#like I get his speech and the recognition of his faults but he still had them and they still were his downfall in the end and part of the#reason Daisuke listened to Jimmy and it’s not his fault that happened but it’s the same way it’s not Curly’s fault Jimmy is like that#but I digress cause people don’t exactly like when we actually discuss the responsibilities the crew mates should’ve and shouldn’t have had#or what they actually did to help cause idk Anya likely would not feel supported by any of them after the fact if they survived like girl#only ever got attention for her problems when they were literally at the worst that’s not helping or taking responsibility like she had to#kill herself to feel some sort of relief also the irony about Curly’s concern about killing herself only#for it to get to the point she actually did because there was no safety for her they all failed her#Swansea would’ve just told her to tell the captain and he’d watch Jimmy and ultimately it would play out the same cause he’s tries to not#get to involved cause he’s old and been through enough already and she’d feel just as unheard like he was closer to Daisuke#and not once after the crash did he really try to steer him away from liking Jimmy which again he points out himself#like I love Swansea and Daisuke but they were just as complacent in Anya’s suffering and Jimmy’s behavior even if they knew less that should#not make them more viable options or it more excusable like crazy conclusions to comes to ig on my part but yall hate#the idea that maybe a major point is that Anya was alone as a woman and overlooked#mouthwashing#ask#mouthwashing game#anon#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing
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Batman Annual #25
Before Talia took him in, before he was dunked in the pit to have his memories restored, even when operating purely on survival instinct, he always split a meal with the other homeless people. It may not have been essential to his survival, but caring about and helping other people when he couldn’t even help himself was just always such an intrinsic part of Jason’s core.
#so much so that it prevailed over basic self-preservation#my guy lost 90% of his cognitive function and he’s still out here helping people in any way he can#my post#new headcanon: that’s why he stole all 4 tires. because he wasn’t just feeding himself in crime alley.#or at least he was planning to expand his work now that he had more confidence in his ability to feed and care for himself#I mean he also isn’t the type to brag about his good deeds yk? we all know he was putting up a tough guy façade when Bruce found him#a mutual asked abt Jason’s white streak so I directed them to hush which ofc reminded me of this book#rather than it being exclusively a pit thing imo it makes more sense for it to be a combination of actual health related issues#like the chronic prolonged mental and physical stress he had to endure coupled with the fact that superboy’s punch kickstarted his body#in ways that are unknown to modern science#and then the pit also had a hand in it (probably??)#(imo). like Talia doesn’t have it. neither do Damian or Ra’s or anyone else who’s been in the pit.#jason todd#dc#batman annual 25#comic panels
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Listening to Ribs by Lorde thinking about a pre breakup Mihawk telling Shanks.
“Your the only friend I need”
And Shanks a man who has always known company and has dedicated his life to having friends/family, doesn’t know how to take that.
Mihawk who intended this as a “flirt” is doing his best looking up through his eyelashes trick.
This does not help. At all
#me further pushing my Shanks is really worried about Mihawk’s loneliness agenda#this was supposed to be serious but I couldn’t help myself. I just think mihawk is so naturally sexy he’d be horrendous at intent flirting#it’s just that Shanks is a social guy he loves having a big and ever extending network of friends and family#Mihawk saying he only needs one friend is so heartbreaking to him#but also the abandonment issues are at war because Mihawk said that him#just him he’s all he needs#but also what if he’s not enough what if he can’t live up to it what if he messes up and mihawk has no one#is he really enough to make people stay?#and then there’s also the little goblin brain that’s cradling mihawk in his hands striking him and going “my precious#Mihawk’s just there like why isn’t the flirt working? why am I not being ravaged. see if I ever do that again 😒.#shanks doesn’t even know what he’s lost 😔#one piece#throwing thoughts to the void#dracule mihawk#op#hawkeye mihawk#mishanks#akagami no shanks#shanks#red haired shanks#akataka#mihawk x shanks
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god we need to bring crackfic back. or just short and idiotic ideas that wouldn’t happen but would be funny to read
#i just had a vivid imagination of geralt’s company having a pillow fight#setting and timeframe: september 10ish. in riverdell aka transriver#dandelion hits geralt with his bedroll pillow (a quite flat thing and not very comfortable but what are you to do) for levity#it’s a game of a bygone time. a mild pillow fight is plausible between geralt and dandelion in the short stories#cahir comments . wow … really dandelion … this is so juvenile … i haven’t done a pillow fight since i was 10 … it’s for kids…#dandelion’s response: pillow to the face. immediate vicovarian reaction: dandelion razed harder by his pillow than cintra by nilfgaard#dandelion screams ear-curdlingly (you’d imagine someone was being murdered in this swamp)#geralt (still at this moment in time resentful of cahir) leaps and attacks him with his pillow#geralt and cahir spar with pillows like swords but get to smothering each other quickly#milva (see this is foreshadowing for like two weeks days later) had enough and starts pillowing the both of them#she also had not said literally anything for the past week so this is a surprise that she would involve herself#dandelion hits milva on the ass (with his pillow…) she nearly kills him#geralt and cahir try to save dandelion etc#regis has been watching all of this like 🫤#geralt (better mood now) asks him why he is not getting involved.#regis: ‘what… ought i to be doing’#geralt: ‘helping me smack cahir with pillows’#regis doesn’t even sleep with a pillow. dandelion calls out he probably has an extra on his bedroll. milva screams at regis don’t touch that#regis psychoanalyzes they are relieving their stresses and anxieties in a social bonding ritual involving play fighting#which is likely of primal origin in simian social troupes but i digress#regis reasons he doesn’t have latent quarrels with anyone in the group so it would be pointless for him to join#cahir is like well i like everybody here and i still am smacking dandelion with a pillow 😐#milva reasons just imagine someone you hate on the other end. she imagined beating the crap out of her stepfather 👍#regis still reluctant to join | geralt gets an idea and smiles—imagine the guy who coined the term ‘undead’#wrath of eons unleashed#regis after knocking geralt off his feet with a pillow: am i doing it right ☺️#meanwhile nilfgaardian spy watching them from the bushes:#‘i was going to report on them but it looks as though they’ve all gone insane’#‘or maybe they were like that all along’#the elbow-high diaries
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The way some people characterise Buffy in fics like you described genuinely put me off Buffy fandom for years, it was absolutely everywhere, in Spuffy fics, in faith/buffy fics, it felt like I couldn't read a fic without the obligatory 'Buffy apologises to whoever the fuck for being so mean' and I just stopped, it was so baffling
For real its so weirdly pervasive. It genuinely blows my mind bc I totally get the urge to use your fic to call out a character/plot point you don't like, more power to you. Like I'm constantly imagining rewrites of the scenes where Xander is at his most insufferable but no one in-show is verbalising obvious holes in his bullshit (my big one is that besides a one off line from Buffy that everyone in the show ignores and a DELETED line from Giles is that NO ONE calls him on his absolutely infuriating "I was jealous of Angel being with the girl I like and I'm gonna have the gall to pretend it was bc I saw him turning evil coming" BULLSHIT)
But like. Buffy? You came out of this show and the person you had beef with and want to call out is BUFFY? THE VAMPIRE SLAYER? The protagonist of all time? Bc she's mean sometimes :( people try to apologise for trying to kill her and she's so unsympathetic :( she carries out her responsibility as the Slayer whether she wants to or not even if the person she's targeting is a character I like :( why won't she apologise. why won't she apologise. why does she insist on taking up space. why can't she just be nice all the time. yes my ao3 tag is princessspuffy why do you ask. yeah I know their relationship is abusive but I think Spike would forgive her :)
#NONE OF YOU DESERVE HER. SHE SAVED EXISTENCE AND YOU SAY SHE SHOULD HAVE SMILED MORE KILL KILL KILL#anyway. normal about her.#buffy summers#buffy the vampire slayer#im not a spuffy hater i love their mess but spike is easily the most common Why Wont Buffy Be Nice To Him i see#even though SPIKE loves her bc she DOESN'T let him off easy#'im a monster but you treat me like a man' was about the kiss in intervention#he hit on her and helped her fight and played nice with the scoobs all season#but he was clearly doing it to GET something and buffy is obviously completely unresponsive to that#but he lets himself get tortured almost to death for buffy and dawn and doesn’t seem to plan on telling them about it until buffy tricks him#THAT was real. the first real selfless good thing he did for her. AND SHE KISSED HIM FOR IT.#buffy has IMMENSE capacity to forgive people who she can see are actually trying#she just has zero patience for coddling self pitying murderers bc she learned from her first boyfriend#if you choose to do wrong she'll stop you but if you choose to do right she SEES that and she remembers it#she responds to action not words. you are what you do. and even if you're a monster#if you try to do the right thing she'll treat you like a man
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More doodles! I’m extremely ill abt jfkonfucius atm, thye make me lose my mind
ALSSSOOO omg these four images together rlly show how inconsistent my style is 😭 Confucius looks different in ALL of them
#art#clone high#clone high season 2#clone high confucius#clone high joan#clone high jfk#clone high harriet tubman#clone high frida kahlo#clem draw something ch related that doesn’t involve Confucius challenge level impossible#I can’t help it he’s just too silly not to draw over and over again#they’re looking at topher in the second image#jfkonfucius#jfk x confucius#HC Confucius despite having raw spaghetti noodles for arms is actually pretty strongn jfk LOVES to be picked up#so Confucius will pick him up n carry him around ALL the time#I love them they make me go insane#also small topher bus cameo as autism creature#topher is SOOOOO autism there’s no way he isn’t
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i seriously need more narumi and mina moments because just imagine the relief mina felt when narumi joined, similar age to her and was also considered a prodigy in the force.
to have someone to share the burden of the defence force’s future with must’ve felt so freeing. because before he joined it was just her, age 18, being told that she was going to change kaiju extermination with her exceptional synergy with firearms. and she was so, so scared.
narumi doesn’t have the kind of skills or talent for long range combat like she does, but he’s also a top candidate (despite his behavioural issues- which aren’t much of a hinderance anyway) and mina doesn’t have to carry the burden of the future alone anymore
(although she’d never admit, given she probably views narumi as someone completely shocking i just think it’s so funny how she stood there like O_O when she first saw him)
like i LOVE seeing the contrast. mina who was sent onto the battlefield for the first time and was deathly afraid vs narumi who was sent out and immediately took action because that’s how he always lived (fighting)
and now they’re the top two strongest captains in the force and they will be the ones to lead the new generation..
#egg boils#IM SOOO BONKERS SORRY THEYRE MY FAVES I WANT THME TO HAVE AN IMPACT ON ESCH ORHEF SO FUCKING BAD.#consider this: narumi teaches mina to be less serious. to stop holding onto the burden of others and her team mates and Fight because she#wants to. hold onto ur weapon clench ur teeth because you WANT to be here and protect lives and not because You feel like you have to ashir#and mina teaches him abt team work and yes you can work along but And maybe having to consider ur team members IS burdensome for u but isnt#it nice to have someone watch ur back? for someone to Help you narumi#please please show me how they’ve influenced each other I KNOW DAMN WELL THEY HAVE. I INOW IT. matsumoto please.#i will never be over mina and how genuinely AFRAID she was#ashiro mina my absolute beloved#narumi tells mina to stop being so freaked out all the damn time because you have your team mates don’t you?! always talking my ear off abo#about team work but you can’t even trust your own comrades?!#mina tells narumi that HE keeps acting recklessly because he doesn’t trust his team mates either!!! they’re perfectly capable too#ohhhhh i’m sick im sick i want mina to knock some sense into narumi and vice versa i want them to be the reason they trust their units to#SUCH a degree now. i want them to be the reason why they stand for their men so strongly (narumi immediately pouncing on no.9 when he showe#kikoru isao’s face. mina’s anger and appreciation when her unit stood their ground against no10.#mina#narumi#kaiju no.8#they’re my top two of course i’m making this shit up. i need it so bad bside please please please#i know she grit her teeth and got used to be alone when she subjugates from the roof top but CONSIDER narumi the delinquent but extremely#capable recruit being the one to show her how to live less in fear#i need a tag for them#don’t be stupid#okay that’s it that’s my tag#kn8 spoilers#sorry again. tagging for myself#narumina
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thinking about todd and his resolve toward… not quite isolation, but being alone in a room full of people again. he goes along to the study room to sit on his own and do his homework, he sits at the poets table and follows along with what’s being said while keeping quiet, he goes to the meetings at all but doesn’t necessarily contribute (in fact, if you watch him when cameron is telling the story ‘from camp in sixth grade’, you can see that he recognizes it before any of the other poets but doesn’t voice it until they all have). he’s not alone, necessarily, if you want to get technical about it, he’s just lonely, and he’s generally okay with that. he doesn’t have friends and that’s fine, he doesn’t participate in class and that’s fine, he doesn’t have a relationship with his family and that’s fine—he could live without any real connection and he’d have been, more or less, fine.
the thing about when he says “i can take care of myself just fine!” is that he isn’t really wrong, you can infer that he’s been doing it his entire life anyway, it’s that ‘taking care of yourself’ isn’t the same thing as really living or being happy. todd’s an introvert, certainly, and even as he gets closer to the group he defaults to sitting quietly in the background, but he’s also denying himself community out of fear not introversion. todd isn’t friendless because he’s an introvert, although that definitely plays a part, he’s friendless because he pushes anyone that might want his company away. if anyone has every wanted for his attention in the first place. (neil’s unwavering interest in him is unique (even when it comes to the rest of the poets, who are fine with todd coming along and joining the group, but aren’t really hellbent on him being there in the beginning) and his refusal to accept it is a direct result of being so lonely growing up.)
there’s obviously something to be said about the implications of his parents neglect, and the more than likely fact that he grew up friendless, and how those both play a part in in him being so skilled at dodging social interaction/being so avoidant of it, but by the time we see him in the movie he’s all but accepted his fate as being alone his entire life. he’s already accepted being the family disappointment, and he’s already accepted he’ll never amount to anything, and he obviously doesn’t like it, but he’d have managed living with that knowledge without the confirmation that it was all wrong. would he have been miserable? almost certainly. but he’d have managed. he’d done it for that long already, anyhow.
#and like obviously it’s BAD in the long run and his isolation IS only making his life worse but… genuinely he’d have been alright#all things considered#it’s super interesting to me how it’s neil who starts the domino effect of todd’s life becoming Less Shit#both by beliving in him and putting faith in him that he’s never seen before and refusing to let him hide away#but it isn’t a savior moment on neil’s part#and i find it so odd when people frame it as one#todd is like… actively irritated at him in that scene 😭#neil is right that todd needs to get out of his shell and put himself out there and Believe in himself#but todd can’t accept it yet because he can’t see what neil sees in him yet and doesn’t believe it exists at all#and it frustrates him because unlike everyone else neil REFUSES to give up on him#and as far as todds concerned it’ll be for nothing#as far as todd’s concerned neil isn’t a savior or a hero in that scene he’s an annoyance#a necessary one in the grand scheme of things but an annoyance all the same#i think people forget that just because todd DOES want to break out of his shell (‘don’t you think you could be?’ / ‘no! i… i don’t know!’ +#‘come on you heard keating don’t you want to *do* something about it?’ / ‘*yes* but…’) doesn’t mean he knows how or believes he actually CAN#todds autonomy can be taken away from him a lot (ironic) and he can be twisted into someone with no opinions or thoughts or whims +#outside of neil but that isn’t really the case#and a part of that blame lands on the movie because todd doesn’t get explored a lot but there’s still evidence of him being his own person#he’s not a yesman and he tells neil when his ideas are stupid (keeping the audition from his father) or he just doesn’t personally agree +#(the entire ‘no’ scene) and he functions perfectly well when neil isn’t around and while they aren’t focuses +#there are short scenes where todds alone or scenes that start eith them apart that make it clear they aren’t attatched to each other +#in the way people can often write them to be (that is in the trenches if the other is missing)#this post and all these tags are my long winded way of saying FUCK the codependent anderperry thing some people subscribe to it makes me#mad#neil’s goal is to help todd grow into himself and become his own person and find his identity more than anything#and todd doesn’t need neil to hold his hand to do literally anything and everything he’s a normal guy with anxiety#come on guys#dps#dead poets society#todd anderson
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