#do you not pain to see others die
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I’ve seen a couple Twitter posts regarding recent politics and I just want to say that hurtful conservative rhetoric leads to situations like the death of Nex Benedict and the harmful fates of many other queer people. You say violence has no room in politics yet your words have led to countless attacks on our communities.
Conservative ideals are harmful. Our communities have been experiencing violence for decades yet you yell violence when your star of being an ass is shot in the ear.
I despise politics for many reasons yet they are the direct cause of far too many injustices. Violence is only wrong to them if it’s experienced by them. Not two spirit 16 year olds- not indigenous communities- not queer people. Only if it’s them.
I cannot express my disgust at how hypocritical these people are. You are harming our communities. Don’t even get me started on Canadian politics. Queer people exist, we will always exist. Indigiqueer people exist. WE WILL ALWAYS EXIST.
Trans people deserve to live and deserve rights. Queer people deserve to live and deserve rights. Conservatives with anti-queer ideologies are causing mass harm.
#i can’t even bring my thoughts together with this#it is INFURIATING that they can be so upset about a god awful political leader#but turn a blind eye at the death of a child or entire communities#selfish and awful#are you not human#do you not pain to see others die#can you really not see your hypocrisy#when you cry for trump but grimace at the outcry to free Palestine#when you whine about the left but you ignore the injustices faced my indigenous communities#when you grovel about freedom whilst despising queer people#vile#you are vile#indigiqueer#fuck conservatives#fuck the system#this is an issue for everyone#no child should fear for their life#in any capacity#anti queer rhetoric leads to violence assaults and deaths#i don’t know if this phrases my thoughts correctly#but#fuck trump#i will not pray for his stupid injuries#i will pray for Palestine#i will pray for Nex Benedict’s family#feel free to add on
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consumed by the inevitable
#messyr#you know- I kept thinking: One day. The cage will be open but I feel like I'll stay. Because if I run- I'd wind up dead from their bullet#so I just- tend to- follow as much as I want to rebel and put sense into this fuckass household. I hate seeing the others in pain as well#and it hurts more that it feels like I can NEVER be the one to break this cycle of abuse- when I knew from the start- when I knew too much#but here I am ending up like the rest of them- helpless and unable to do jackshit about the situation. I cant say or do anything at all!#I dont want to end up like them- if anything I want to BREATHE- i want all of us to LIVE without this pain that has existed for generations#I want to help so bad no matter how much I know I am unloved.#no matter how much hate i carry- no matter how much burden- Underneath it all- I'm devoted to them- that's how fucked up I am#i know i'll never be enough. I know how often I think of death and wish it.#But I have a dream to achieve and I am not planning to die until I reach it. Not yet. If pain is where I strive best then so be it.#doodle#vent art#artists on tumblr#bpd#toxic behavior#learned helplessness
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are we ever gonna talk about this
#my posts#my aftg posts#aftg#all for the game#the foxhole court#the sunshine court#if you haven't read the extra content you are in a lot less pain than me#because there's so much. just so much#and this. he kills himself to draw attention to the raven's abuse#AND TO SHOW HIS SUPPORT FOR KEVIN WHAT DO YOU MEAN?????#it happens on the day/night of graduation!!!! which means 2 years post-tkm??? unless the timeline is different in other drafts#just imagine kevin in every draft. but especially in that one#oh my god ohhhhhhhhh my god im so glad we did not have to see that#and at one point nora says jean has complicated feelings about neil and kevin but he was always willing to die for them#???????????? literally wtf
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can the mtt commit more crimes that just murder please i know theyre the MURDER time trio but ppppleasse,,,, please,,,,,,
they'd be terrible to be next to on the highway. horror's going 160 mph amd has long past gone over the speed limit. dust's out for BLOOD and by blood i mean your tires. he's somehow sniping those round rubber wheels from the high moving vehicle with the precision of a master fruit ninja player. if your car explodes or flips over in the process that's not his fault. and then to make matters worse for everyone on the highway killer's in the backseat scratching up the doors and windows of your car with a knife everytime horror gets close to another car and oops he accidentally just disfigured your face also did i mention theyre all drunk during this
ok so theyve all got the classic face WHY DONT THEY ABUSE IT!!!! horror gets to do a little paper mache to cover up his head hole and then wearing glasses. killer i dont know what the FUCK he can do to get rid of his perpetual tears but let's just pretend that theyre conveniently gone for now. and then all dust has to do is put down his hood! anyways identity theft is cool. imagine how much they could totally fuck up classic's reputation with this. set up fake tinder profiles and then scam people for their credit card info/free dates (while ordering every expensive thing) and stealing wallets. walking into various grillby's's around the multiverse and telling terrible jokes. like ACTUALLY bad jokes. and then of course just being a huge piece of shit at the bar. god theres so many things they could do pretending to be classic. which one of us is hikaru looking ahh except the only difference between the three is the color of the stains on their clothes (either gray (dust) black (killer) or red. well faded red (horror))
ROBBERY!!!! ROBBERIES PLURAL!!!??? train robbery gas station robbery bank robbery GOVERNMENT robbery (what would you rob the government for?? documents??? idk) anyways. mtt robbing a train except its just a really shitty plan and they dont know jackshit about what theyre doing. killer's taken over the conductor's cabin and now he is booking it. how fast are trains allowed to go idk but the maximum. anyways meanwhile horror's on the tracks fucking up the rails with his strength or whatever (listen i know he's weak but picking and choosing what hcs i believe in is my art) and dust is there to teleport him away before the train crashes into him and turns him into a trolley problem victim. and then of course that shit doesnt fucking work and the train just ends up flipping over and catching on fire or something (killer survives because of course he does he's killer). and then in the end dust just has to flip the entire train over and they just stroll into the part that actually HAS the money
and then they go out and get ice cream. sometimes the murderers need to take a break from murdering and just do NORMAL crime yk???
#dragging this absolutely ancient draft out of the trenches because i've been having a scene in my head that fits this#i mean not REALLY related to this since its not a crime. more like him reckless abandon of life! their own lives! yeah they die#imagining.... trio driving around in the mountains. dust's driving ans horror's in the passenger and killer's in the back seat because he i#and dust just starts speeding up like...... much more than he really should be in the fucking mountains#and killer points it out and now all of a sudden horror is absolutely terrified LMAOOOO trying to get dust to slow down#and then they crash. but if there's no one more determined in the world killer can always load a save and theyre alive again#and dust is STILL speeding when they come back even with the knowledge that they die and horror's still terrified#but dust just tells him to calm down and loosen up a little bit!!! theyll come back afterwards anyways and they dont even die in pain#and after a few more deaths horrors just like. ugh. fine. you know what FINE ILL GO ALONG WITH IT#he says as he starts laughing along with dust because man!! the feeling of looking out at nature right before they die in a blaze of glory#is GREAT!!!! and then you know something something horrordust have trust in killer to bring them back after they all die#something something horror is willing to give up his usual reservations to have fun with the other two#and its so fun afterwards.... because nobody but them gets hurt!!! dust and horror wouldnt wanna hurt anyone after their au lore#and killer has no reason to in this scenario. so it all works out for them!! the only people getting hurt are them and lowkey they deservei#the sans in the au is probably sooo confused as to why the world is reloading even though theres no human doing so 💀 killer you GOOF#theyve probably all died so many times but only they remember it. soooo cute.... only they get to see each other at their weakest 💔💔💔#killer absolutely abuses the save point when theyre all together i just knowww ittttt sooooo well#he wants everything to continue not restart or go back??? ok but everything IS continuous with these two#not like they stay doing one thing over and over anyways so its not really perpetual. anyways dust and horror would get bored along with hi#if they just kept doing the exact same thing over and over trying to find every possible ending. nahhhh#triglycercule this is sooo unhealthy none of them would do this!! ok well they make each other worse who said it was ever gonna be healthy#screw EVERYONE in the violet banquet discord server who indulged me in my trio waltz dancing in a field of flowers at 3 am. brainrot now...#this scene i described in tags totally happened in my trio meet each other fic btw. just that it hasn't gotten to this point at ALL yet 💀💀#tricule rant#killer sans#dust sans#horror sans#murder time trio#sans au#utmv
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ghost stares at the ceiling, chest heaving in a harsh pant; sweat ice on his clammy flesh and soaked into the sheet he restlessly kicks away.
ears still ringing, his fingertips blindly drift down to trail along his vivisection scar. he half-expects blood to smear in their wake. his own line of solomon, who ordered him split in twain; half of him given to a grieving mother and half left with the grieving to be.
just for both his broken halves to be rejected.
what did it make him that his mother grieved him more than she loved him? that she begged to be relieved of him more adamantly than she begged to receive him? why did his worth spill out with his drawn blood? why was his pain lesser than hers?
his hand flexes, digging into the raised scar like it’ll part beneath his fingertips to plunge into his mangled insides. no one knows the cruelty of reforming the halved; his name, his being, not nearly as important as his body when he was stripped from himself. no one knows the pain of healing and understanding losing pieces of yourself means losing your value along with them.
how many more pieces did he have to lose before he was halved once more? before his very presence incurred grief so strong it was better to be rid of him than cradle his bloodied remains?
did the infant fight himself? did he age always at odds with himself; his halves never truly whole? he hopes he wasn’t, that he was spared the loss of self; the fear that one may be welcomed over the other.
who will he lose when the inevitable comes? when he’s ripped apart again? simon? or ghost? is it better to be cursed with choice just like his mother or live with an aftermath chosen for him? does it matter if in the end, he convinces himself there was nothing of him left to lose?
his head lolls to the side and the wild buck of his chest slows. he watches johnny beside him, his face lax with the rare peace of sleep; his cheek squished against the pillow, his lips pursed as long breaths escape him.
johnny. soap. never torn asunder but two all the same.
he carefully reaches out and ghosts his fingers along the jagged scar on his chin. even in sleep, he presses into his bloodied touch. he’s never fled his half-flesh, never shies away from his gore as it spills unbidden from his cleaved torso. he holds on where his mother let him go; cups his stomach to hold his insides in place and never minds the blood that drips through his fingers.
simon will never let him become his own solomon and cannibalise himself. he will never let him question which half of him has more value; which pieces he can afford to lose before he’s cast aside.
ghost’s soap. simon’s johnny. his.
whole, in any incarnation.
#yall know the story of king solomon?#and the two mothers who claim a baby is theirs so he orders the baby cut in half so they can each have half of him?#well guess what woke me up out of a dead sleep and demanded to be written?#anyway roba showing simon clips of his mum on the news begging for the safe return of her boy#for the government to do something; /anything/ please she just wants her son back#just for ghost to dig himself out of simon's coffin and she can't bear to look at the man he's become#he's cold and afraid and hesitant and angry and in pain and so different from her little boy that it's just too difficult for her#he's a living breathing reminder that her simon didn't come back from the desert#and ghost has to live with the knowledge that his mum couldn't love him through anything#that maybe if he got himself out sooner if he was stronger or smarter or a better soldier... if he hadn't let simon die...#maybe he wouldn't have changed so much that she wouldn't look him in the eye and see a stranger#if you know anything about me by now you know i love the separation of the self and the person they become around others or bc of trauma#whether thats hizashi and present mic or simon and ghost its one of my absolute favourite tropes#and simon knowing hes become someone else and going home expecting to still be loved anyway?#just for this new version of himself to be rejected?#thats the moment he fractures into ghost#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#we’re a team. ghost team#simon ghost riley#ghost cod#john soap mactavish#soap cod#soapghost#ghostsoap#ghoap#ghost call of duty#cod mw2#cod mwii#save post
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Like they just did that and moved on
#i know they werent the point of the story/other things were going on (al) BUT OMFG#like WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE JUST WENT AND DID THAT?? WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY MEANT EVERYTHING TO HIM???#“oh. ive had enough. yeah. thats all i really need. they gave me everything i could want. hehe. thank you. and goodbye. my friends”#ASDFGHJKL?!?!?!?!??!?!#sorry i cant be coherent about this please understand what im trying to say#“i want the world” “no you want friends” “shit ur right. guess ill die” “okay cool ill yell ur name and then never be sad about it”#do not misunderstand me i absolutely love them i adore them but like do you see what im trying to say#also in the sub (the one i watched at least. idk if they differ between platforms) he says#“enough... yeah. thats enough. i dont need anything more. see you later. my soul... friends”#OUGH#FUCK#thank goodness for fanfiction yknow. i need them in grief and pain but also i need him to live yknow#fmab spoilers#fmab#fullmetal alchemist brotherhood#greed the avaricious#greedling#ling yao#edward elric#im so not okay about them istg#moss' madness
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here together
#lobotomy corporation#lobcorp#lobotomy corp spoilers#lobotomy corporation spoilers#abram lobcorp#i didnt know that the song that plays during day 48 ending is called 'here together'.#couldnt hear it well because i typically have my sound low (sensetive to louder sounds) and also the dialog fucked me up#so when i pressed on it to hear it. to actually listen to it. then to see the name and remember what it Looked like#i got teary eyed. sorry.#it happened quite. afew times when finishing this shitty thing#i was thinking of how camren's not quite corpse looked as if it were reaching out to him inside the container#how it looked as if she had wings. abrams words. the line from one story that was--#something like 'we were hoping it was just one big prank and she would hop out fro. around the corner with a smile on her face'#how do you move forward when all you think you cause is pain? when everything else youve done only brought to bring people you love to thei#downfall and demise inside agony and fear as they lay dying. none of that was merciful. none of that was just. they were told to carry on#her dream and he views as if all he had done was to become cruel and wasnt fit and never even began to finish what she started.#it was so striking to me. the language he used. sleeping. alseep. waken. when all the others never sugarcoated it#in lobcorp they always said it straight. 'suicide' 'killed' 'dead'. but he used something far more.. peaceful? kind in wording in a way.#softer. describing death as if it were a merciful thing. an end that suits them and not something to be afraid of. to just... sink. to slee#to be with carmen again. to put everything to an end#the place they built with their hands. to have it just... stop. not in a way of repeating and staying in the moment#but of a permanent end. to 'sleep'. to die. to just.... stop. forever. to see no more. to do no more#to not be able to do Anything for when ever he had done Something it just cause agony. cruel hands partaking in acts he so deeply#regrets. everything is just regret. it sounds nice. to move on. to just move forward. but how can you move forward when all you think you#bring to those you cherished and couldnt leave behind is pain?#ill likely move this somewhere else as well. ive been meaning to talk about abram#the rest as well actually. mostly just the few final days w abel adam and abram since i am STUCK ON DAY 49#oh dear i uh typed a lot in the tags. oops
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Every time I drink wine I am will graham looking down at a shot hannibal and we have become each other and he is bleeding out and I am savouring the moment by drinking wine the way he does and I gloat like god often does and he takes the violence the way I did every time he violated me and he almost dies from a distant form of violence but what ultimately really kills him are my hands the way I said I’d do it anyway who wants another glass
#all I’m saying is that this scene was a metaphor for gay sex. hannibal was literally penetrated by the bullet#the details are insane actually#their looks have obviously turned into each other with will all clean shaven and in a button down while Hannibal wears a shirt and informal#blazer#but the way the scene is shot#the angle and the light#wills face being so dark cause we can see the darkness in him#hannibal accepting the pain the way will die when he took a saw to his skull or literallt any other time#they’re turning into each other do you understand they became each other#also most intense eye fucking I’ve ever seen on telly or in real life#also will asking Hannibal if god gloats in Digestivo (or dolce? I forgot)#and then gloating as hannibal is in obvious pain and bleeding out#they should’ve fucked nasty but tbh this was more fun to watch#the way will did*#hannibal#nbc hannibal#hannigram#emmys thoughts on hannibal#mads mikkelsen#Hugh dancy#wrath of the lamb
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pissed about the dark brotherhood ending since 2011
#wdyfm they all die. wdym.#that’s my FAMILY!!!!!!!#AND WHEN YOU GO INTO THE SANCTUARY AND SEE THEM…. AUGHHGHHHH ITS SO PAINFUL EVERYTIME.#veezara (i think) on the tree outside…. istg i saw red#AND THERES NO OTHER WAY TO DO IT. YOU HAVE TO LET THEM FUCKING DIE#ik astrid sold me out but she’s basically my mom. idc#and ARNBJORN?????? guy#god*#skyrim#tes#dark brotherhood#bg3
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tonight on thinking about homura and madoka.
#........................................dude#head in hands#ALMOST A HUNDRED FUCKING TIMES SHE WAS TRAPPED IN THE LOOP ALMOST A HUNDRED. FUCKING. TIMES#god#they give me so many emotions#theres something about doomed timeloops where over and over again you have to watch the one person you gave everything to save#die over and over and over. and you just have to get back up again knowing that you wont be able to save them#but you get up anyways and you try again even as you slowly lose yourself to the point they dont even recognize you anymore.#they barely know you at all. but thats okay because it was always for them anyways so who cares if they dont know you as long as theyre saf#it was always for them. because they were everything. and without them you are nothing at all. even if they dont know you.#at one point they did. at one point they loved you. and it was everything.#and holy FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKk#you guys I could talk about homura for hours#SHE SPENT 12 YEARS IN THAT LOOP. 12 YEARS.#GUYS. SHE WAS 14 YEARS OLD WHEN SHE MADE THE WISH. 14. SHE WAS 14 FUCKING. YEARS OLD.#i love homura. she is my daughter she is aksifhmkjhsngkjnhajfsjkgnskjgh#augh. doomed yuri. my doomed daughters. they just wanted to protect each other. and it cost them everything.#pmmm#raven rambles#theres a pattern here. you see. you see how my favorite characters are always the ones who only live for one other person#to the point it kills them. it leads them to kill. they felt unconditional love for the first time and it is their death.#they know it is. and they walked into hell willingly but they couldnt die. not if there was a chance they could have that again.#not if there was a chance the one who loved them could be safe from that pain. do you see. theres a fucking pattern here#they'll watch themselves become someone they hate but someone who might be able to save them this time. do you understand#augh. okay I'll shut up and go to bed#Im just having Emotions tonight ig
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Blankie time we share body warmth and the bad dreams bounce back and crash into a wall and die <3
Blankie time💙🖤
#my stuff#asks#i extremely rarely sleep without my necklace and this is why. every time i have horrific dreams that leave me soaked in adrenaline#i was trapped in a stairwell with one entrance barricades and the other was a door i had to keep closed with my body#and there was a horde of zombies behind it trying to get in#i fell asleep holding it shut and dreamed about how i got there. the people i saw go from human to ravenous monster#whenever i have these dreams i’m not scared of pain or body horror#i’m scared of the hunger i see in their eyes. I’m scared that the only way to stop them is to kill them in an extremely difficult way#sometimes they can’t die at all#it so very clearly reflects my fear and distrust of The Population At Large as an autistic and trans person#anyone could turn on you. you have to protect those you love or they will turn on you too.#i always dream like this when i’m stressed and it doesn’t help the situation#i do not fear being devoured and i do not fear coming back. i fear i will be made into something that can only do evil#often in these dreams i get eaten and reanimate with my mind intact and then have to Convince the others that i’m infected to avoid#to avoid being completely devoured#so yeah. autistic masking isn’t taking any toll i’m sure#burying myself in the blankie for ever and ever
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I don't like drawing furries with digitigrade feet on otherwise human body plans like you CANNOT convince me that it looks functional as a permanent means of support and locomotion. You just can't. No fun allowed plantigrade those feet
#Looking through art fight bookmarks at things I will Not be drawing because it will be a miracle if I catch up on revenges in 36 hours.#Seeing 'digitigrade optional' and whooping and hollering with glee. Maybe next year.#I think it looks ok in stylized art styles but it's like a weird sort of thing where the more otherwise realistic/better executed the#overall anatomy is the more jarringly off the digitigrade feet look to me#When I do that drawing other people's characters I'll usually lay it out like a human standing on their toes so it like. Looks feasible but#the human body is just so not built to perpetually support itself like that. I know this from experience because I habitually#toe walked as a little kid and developed joint pain and had to wear leg braces... The results are harrowing#Your furries are gonna have joint problems like crazy they're gonna die so badddddd#(not serious furries aren't real draw whatever the fuck you want. But I Won't)
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i will stop posting about sv one day ( a lie ), but cryingggg over this set they released because a.) why'd they have to do dodo so dirty like that by putting his artwork from like ten years before with yout.arous ... full on you vs the guy she tells you not to worry about looks rn but b.)
... that second image of them all in the son, how happy calm and replaced they all look.someone made lich.t a flower crown and im going to loose my head over it for weeks.
#❛ ♡ › jupiter : 𝐨𝐨𝐜.#waaa you can tell its coming to an end bc so much is being released.#i need everyone to know i would die for this badge collection ... fr please give international buyers an opportunity#i will be hounding ebay for this----#but i saw this earlier and was seeing whats included and i just. dont do dod.o DIRTY ... youtar.ous outshining at the end there rn ...#but the other picture. i need it without the sample so badly. so i can have it on my blog ... somewhere....#i say everyones calm but ku.ro looks so pained.#hes calm btw. he had the calmest years of his life like for 500 years and had the same expression /j#seeing mis.ono again makes me so happy. pls if someone is looking for a sv muse id kill for a mis.ono around. his and mik.unis dynamic mean#a lot to me <3
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steve meeting a young tony rotten with grief after december 16, 1991 and thinking "oh. he's like me."
#stony#stevetony#tony stark#steve rogers#was thinking about this charming man which of course sent my brain on a spiral#like what if steve and tony met right after howard died#how would grief taint the way they see howard and the way the see each other?#like i feel like both tony and steve repress their emotions but in like wildly different ways#tony needs something else to drown it out#i think it's no coincidence that he enters his “playboy” era in his twenties quite literally right after howard and maria die#he wants to feel anything and everything but the pain#and then STEVE#steve simply does not acknowledge his grief#he's doing just fine thank you. is there anything he can do to help you. anything at all. (anything to forget)#and just like this steve and this tony seeing each other and finding the perfect (toxic) distraction 💖#not the healthiest dynamic but it's fiction so who cares#marvel#mcu
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watching Gladiator feeling like a wife who’s sighing over her beloved who was put in prison for a crime he didn’t commit. free my husband
#he wasn’t guilty#he didn’t deserve any of it#i would throw myself at the judge’s feet and beg for his life like in a dramatic movie#anything for him 😭#gladiator gives me 1000+ emotional damage every time i watch it#no other movie makes me so happy yet so sad#it just guts me every time#seeing him lose everything and just give up 😭😭#and then be mistreated and abused and mocked and forced into horrible situations#but continuing to be noble and honorable#and doing his duty even when all he wants is to die and be with his family#and when it seems like there’s some hope but then he’s betrayed again 😭😭😭#and his death#the staggering the pained breathing the soft smile when he sees his family waiting for him#I WANT TO DIE I CAN’T TAKE IT ANYMORE#maximus let me love you all the days of my life#let me love and comfort and hold you#i would be so good to him :(#i just love him so endlessly and so painfully#gladiator#text posts#russell crowe#maximus#gladiator 2000#maximus decimus meridius
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I kinda really hate how I've been treated throughout my life
#Entire life of abuse and neglect and mistreatment only to always be told none of it happened. To the point where I really struggle with#thinking that I made it all up or that I'm overreacting or faking or playing the victim constantly#I honestly try my best to move forward and I want to be happy. I see absolutely zero point in wallowing. Others can if they wish‚ but I wan#to enjoy my life at some point. I think I've gotten better the past year- In great part of my dearly beloved- but it's still so#deeply difficult. Interactions so commonly feel like a trap and there is the perpetual sense of being watched and monitored#I often feel like a prey animal that is cornered and my only options are to take it in fear and die or to lash out and hurt the other party#I think I'm not as mean as others in this system though LMFAO. I'm not like Roxas who once compared a friend of ours to our parents during#an argument.#<- Not to say Roxas is a bad person. He's a severely hurt and traumatized kid who kinda only knows how to lash out to protect himself#Sighs. It's complicated. I do not wish to be someone angry like Roxas or Lexi. But they actually talk back and stand up for themselves. And#the system as a whole. Whereas I fawn and take it and then wonder why I always want to kill myself 24/7#I don't really know how to speak up for myself because it really feels like every single time I do (Or just voice an opinion confidently in#a group) it goes horribly wrong and people get upset and angry with me#And then people being angry at me causes major fucking spirals because it reminds me of my mother and then I start feeling like I'm going t#be fucking berated and have a metal crate thrown at me again 😭😭😭 Or get kicked out of the car or given the silent treatment etc etc etc#Which is a me problem I need to get over my fear of people being mad at me because it's an inevitable fact of life but. Hashtag severely#traumatized and still actively being traumatized by multiple parties#And also being in my own head and existing is very fucking harmful! Being in a mind that is so aggressive and destructive... It's difficult#to just 'get over' my issues‚ you know? So whenever they come up I try to just isolate so I don't cause any issues#<- Unless it's my histrionic stuff acting up. Then I'm complaining like hell because it feels actually fucking painful to not be receiving#attention during those breakdowns#Anyways! I kinda fucking suck and hate myself right now and want to kms. But that's how I am 24/7 so whatever#tw suicide#⛪️
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